#but it will be within your boundaries and likes and nothing that would be uncomfortable :3

[chibishortdeath]

Ok, I’m sick of seeing only Netflix posts lately so I’m ranting about Simon lol

Unfortunately I had some nice paragraphs written for this but tumblr crashed while I was writing so this is my second time making this post (TwT)

TL;DR with the rant under a cut for easy scrolling, I am deranged and have studied all of Simon’s outfits, here’s some fun tidbits and I guess kinda a guide about his fashion sense :3

Oh boy, where to start XD. Castlevania has a lot of intricately detailed usually gothic and/or visual kei inspired fashion designs, usually with some amount of historical accuracy, thanks to Ayami Kojima, that the series is known for. But before this, the character design style was very different. From the very 90s shonen anime inspired Richter, to Christopher being deadass shirtless in a skirt at one point, to John Morris being in basically casual clothes, there’s a lot of variety in it.

Well, being the silly Simon super fan I am, I’ve studied all his outfits a ton over the years I’ve been a fan of the series and oh boy they are INTERESTING :3. I’ve noticed a lot of elements are consistently reoccurring, specific to him, and some are very much not specific to him lol. Anyway, just trust me on this one, overanalyzing the closet of an NES barbarian to be able to make new outfits for him is FUN >:3c.

So, I’ve seen him not wearing pants thrown around as a joke before, but it’s actually the truth! Besides the Haunted Castle wedding suit (an outlier that should not be counted lol), I actually have never run into a design where Simon is wearing full length, proper pants. The closest he ever gets is black tights in Simon’s Quest and occasionally shorts, but on that topic, shorts aren’t even his most common choice! Let’s look at some of his oldest designs:

This one is really hard to tell, but based on the angle of the lines, the shadows, and context clues from other art for CV1, I don’t know if that’s actually supposed to be shorts 💀💀💀!

In both his cute little manual doodles and his almost more adorable teeny 8-bit sprite, his outfit is a belted tunic of some sort! So like, the equivalent of a really tiny dress or a long shirt XD. And really, his cover art design is kinda just a more detailed version of these. They both have a distinction between a top and bottom part of the upper half, they both have big belts, they both have the tall boots and arm guards, they both have teeny skirt part, and Fun Fact! They both have red in the hair! I color picked a nice high res scan of the CV1 cover art, and yes, there’s red in his hair!!! It’s like a nice mix of dark reddish blond, it’s a very fun hair color :3.

However, that’s not where CV1 ends in tunic vs shorts debate:

THAT’S A SKORT— DO YOU SEE THAT DISTINCTION BETWEEN THE HALVES, ONE IS DEFINITELY A PANTLEG LMAO. So yeah, skort Simon is also a thing thanks to this particular magazine scan lol, thus leaving us with the possibility that it is both a skirt and shorts on the CV1 cover that he’s wearing X,,,,D. Never change, Simon, never change.

Besides the tunic, there’s some other interesting details to his CV1 era designs! :D In a lot of depictions he has this neat cape, something that returns in some Simon’s Quest art and Smash Bros lol, but he’s never shown wearing it in game. What’s interesting is that Trevor actually gets a cape in his game’s opening as well as Christopher in Belmont’s Revenge if I’m remembering correctly. It’s very neat seeing Simon character design details rubbing off into other characters :3. I like to think lore wise that it’s the same cape that’s been passed down to Simon from those two.

He also has the headband! Iconic! But have you noticed the little ball shapes at the ends of the tails? They’re either knots or, infinitely cooler option, beads :D!!!!!!! And I wouldn’t be surprised if they were because that leads me to another design: X68000–

Now this one is one of my favorites :3. It’s kinda like a forward facing version of his original design but with some new details! And his headband gets this cool lookin, intricate distinctly metallic design on it, something I’ve seen a lot of artists simplify to a general crescent moon shape. But it is kinda similar to the shape on his belt buckle, something that I still have no idea what it’s even supposed to be. Also, his arm guards and the thing at the end of his necklace (which may or may not have vampire teeth on it, they could just be metal spikes though) are similar; it makes me wonder if it was an attempt at a tortoiseshell pattern? Filigree? Whatever it is, they’re all matchy matchy about it.

This design also gives him the staple left shoulder pauldron, of which has these huge stitches holding it on and an added belt that connects to his other belt armor. Get used to belts, he has a lot of those X,,,D. What’s really neat about this one’s belt is that he has both a hilt for the family sword but also one for the whip on the other side, and they’re on the wrong sides for drawing the weapon properly 💀💀💀💀. Which is also funny considering his CV1 cover art has the sword on the other side, which is kinda wrong too? Who knows, maybe he’s ambidextrous and just doesn’t care what sides they’re on lol.

The biggest thing I can say about this design though is that a lot of these accessories and armor pieces look homemade, like as if he just took teeth as a trophy himself and strung them on a cord or made a shoulder piece and put it on an already existing belt he had. Adding onto this, there’s also the possible beads on his headband and the cords around his boots (which could be an attempt at a certain actual historical type of shoe that I cannot remember the name of for the life of me rn, in which case would make these not boots and actually corded shoes with very nice big fluffy socks hehe, I am forcing you to imagine him with big fluffy socks—) and yeah! I can see him making his stuff on his own :3. Which is so cool! I love this idea so much, it makes for a lot of things to imagine him doing hehe. Also gives him a hobby??? Yeah :)

No indication of if he’s got shorts or not in this one, maybe I’ll count how many have skirts or shorts and put that at the end of this lol.

But shorts get another point again cause we’re looking at Chronicles:

Oh Chronicles. Well, the first thing I wanna mention is that, this is Ayami Kojima’s design for him, so here we are seeing a very interesting mix of the visual kei style and 80s barbariancore in a way that honestly slays (figuratively and literally). And, surprisingly, there is something historically accurate about this design, and it’s not what you’d probably expect. Based on the width, material, cross rivets, and the buckle on the front, Simon is wearing an actual dog collar. Like, for dogs. Like it’s dog armor used primarily for hunting dogs I just— Again, never change Simon, never change 💀💀💀.

We also see Simon preferring to put his armor on his left side again with the torn in half coat. It’s also somewhat similar to 1600s coats, not really of any specific country in fashion that I can tell, however the sleeve being that short is not accurate, leading me to believe that he probably tore that off too lol. Very Chrom Fire Emblem of you, Simon, and another example of him D.I.Y.—ing things. The basic elements still stay similar to past designs. Shorts, distinct upper and lower half of shirt, belts, armor on said belt, sword and whip hilts, arm armor and tall boots (shout out to the heels on this one), and armor on the left, unfortunately no headband though. But that distinct bottom half to the shirt part of his outfit in this one is defined with… a corset? Yeah!!! That’s a corset!!! Though the proper name for the time period might be a stay or a girdle, but Simon is straight up wearing a belt over a corset. And said corset over a coat. Half of one. Don’t question him—

But the main entries to his 80s bara-barian half of the wardrobe, let’s get to some knightly aesthetic outfits, of which he does have a good amount, starting with SCV4:

Simon’s knightly outfits are usually a similar silhouette as his original tunic look, just in metal this time and in various colors. SCV4 has his armor as gold on the cover, blue on the Japanese cover and manual art, and green in game! And they’re all pretty much the same with mild variations. On the cover art, his shoes are corded sandals with nothing under them, but in game and in most other artwork they are these metallic boots with the classic X shape of the cords baked into them. Some art gives his middle belt armor section this cross with snakes on it, which is an odd thing to be referencing here. It’s either a staff of Mercury, usually associated now with medicine but was an alchemical symbol before that, or something else I can’t find any info on. There’s also a big ab window because these are all proper half shirts lol. Straight up a metal breastplate with nothing under it, a pretty bad idea tbh 💀.

All in all, these are generally really simple, but there’s one more thing before I stop talking about SCV4:

I LOVE this design. It’s this really nice blend of the older CV1 era style and the metal armor of the later ones, very cool. Shout out to the eye creases and the dead stare shadow over his eyes too, they really conveyed the effects of witnessing the horrors well lmaoooo.

Again, tunic, belt, arm guards, headband, the usual, but, speaking of symbols, there’s something about this one that’s been driving me nuts forever: I cannot find out what that symbol on his paldrons and belt buckle is!!! It’s this upside down triangle with a bent rectangle missing the bottom line over it and it LOOKS distinctly intentional, but I can’t find it or what it means anywhere!!! I tried searching through lists of alchemical symbols, religious symbols, nothing so far has been close (TwT ). Regardless, great design, definitely in my top 5.

And what else is in my top five? Oh yeah babey, it’s Simon’s Quest time:

Ah, Simon’s Quest with his fuck ass bob and the stolen Ravenloft image— but unironically, that armor fucks fr. Again, similar silhouette! If there’s any take aways from this post, it’s definitely that Simon is a little shirt, little pants kind of guy. A severe lack of long sleeves and long pants legs until now, and even then, these are skin tight. Heck even his boots(????) are vacuum sealed, just look at those fabric creases by his ankle!

Now, it’s honestly really hard to tell if his “gloves” and “boots” are supposed to be in some parts metal due to the shading on them and the base armor being very similar. I personally like to depict the forearm and calf parts as metal and the hand and ankle parts as not, but eh. Like most things regarding Simon, I suppose this too is up to interpretation XD. There’s some variation in color in some scans having the underclothes be white, dark blue, or black, and the armor be any range of red to purple to brown too. But towards red and black is probably the most accurate due to his sprite being those colors.

But this is a shockingly rare case of Simon being fully covered in one of his outfits, and I’m inclined to think that there’s probably a reason for that. Not only does he have a rotting curse right now and drawing straight up gore on the cover of an NES game was just not an option lol, but he’s not letting his guard down anymore after being hit. Which would also explain the sudden change to all metal armor as that can’t be cut through as easily as leather.

Speaking of all metal armor, oh I looooove the detailing on his. The gold accents to his byzantine (a nice in between color of red and purple, a color that is also reused in Smash Bros again in the middle corset section of his outfit) are what I would call stylized floral patterns, kinda in the way that fleur de les don’t really look exactly like flowers but still are supposed to represent one. Not sure what kind exactly, but possibly some sort type of angel’s trumpet? Very neat regardless. The gems inlaid in it are all green on top and around the belt, but the center belt buckle is bright red. It’s a very jewel tones color scheme!!!

Well anyway, if tumblr will let me have more images, I’d like to show off a few other random examples of outfit elements he’s had before I close this off with something :3

This was a pretty recently found scan of Simon wearing get this: a pleated miniskirt. Probably Roman armor inspired, as some of his other magazine scans have depicted him as such. One ad for SCV4 and another (live action even) for Simon’s Quest has him even wearing like a Roman helmet and everything, it’s odd. Add helmets to the list of things Simon might wear. Hmm maybe I should make a tier list of things based on how often he’s worn them…

Moving on!

This one goes for the bold choice of giving Simon not only an expected tiny belted tunic, but side slits on the legs! And uh um a little too much detail but uh— It’s also this kinda white, kinda bluish, kinda silverish color? Add this to Simon’s color palette I guess lol.

Which reminds me that I didn’t mention colors very much until now whoops. Throughout all of hie designs he primarily seems to wear neutrals like various browns, greys, and metal tones. But he also has a lot of color. Like as in there’s enough different colored designs to make a whole rainbow of Simon outfits. Common combinations like dark green, gold, and wine reds; blue and silver; brown, gold, orange, and kinda purplish greys; etc etc. And his HAIR. Oh boy, would this guy love modern hair dye X,,,,,D. He’s had it various blonds, reds, browns, even black at one point, blue, green, unnatural red, pink, and in one concept design white! Personally, I like depicting it as a nice in between of red, blond, and brown, it encompasses the most I think.

The final thing I wanna mention is the Smash Bros design, which I unfortunately can’t show because I’m on mobile and have met the 10 images limit whoopsie— (_ _ ;). This design is really a good culmination of a lot of elements. Not really definitive or anything, but very good :3. And it has something I didn’t mention earlier that I’ve noticed in some Simon designs: random belts or metal around his upper arms and thighs lol. The Smash Bros design in particular has the arm band things on both sides, Chronicles has it on the not half coat one, but this is another thing I’ve seen other characters (Christopher in particular, but his are just gold rings) have. The leg thing is less common, but yeah, that exists lol. Thank you Simon for uh bending two pieces of metal around your leg…? It’s cool XD. The corset also makes a return, as well as, once more, the same basic silhouette with the armor only on the left side, the belt armor pieces, etc etc. He’s very particular about that—

Well, anyway, Simon definitely has a vibe going on, but here’s a brief summary of things he seems to like:

Skirts, tunics, long shirts, and shorts (and skorts I guess), but nothing past about half his thigh, generally over the knees.

No long sleeves or pant legs (unless it’s tights when absolutely necessary).

Armor primarily to the left, unless it’s metal, in that case usually a full plate or paldron set.

Belts, hilts, belts on his arms, and neck, and hanging off of things, and legs, yeah belts—

Boots/tall socks, corded or not, and something on his forearms or wrists.

Headband! Seriously out of every Belmont he is the most dedicated to these lol.

Necklaces and beads and other little accessories and adornments are also cool.

Alrighty then, have fun Simon-ing and I encourage you to look through his or other characters’ designs and pick them apart a bit sometimes, even if it’s just through what’s on the wiki :3. If anything, I think it’s a good exercise in character design and consistency! But yeah, I wrote all this late at night and can’t think of anything else rn. If I do I’ll do a sequel I guess hehe. Either that or I might rant about another character hmmmmmmm—

[thatnonameuser]

What would malleus/sebek/silver do if MC said they don't mind them, but Lilia makes them super uncomfortable? Let's break up a family 👐

So you know how some terminal momma’s boys are completely and utterly blind to whatever their spouses go through despite the fact that they are vocal about how clearly uncomfortable they feel because of how their in-laws treat them? And when they’re confronted with the Ultimatum of ‘it’s either them or me’  and It’s kind of like that.

Insert the dilemma.

First, Malleus would not take your ultimatum well…

Malleus loves Lilia and asking him to let go of his only remaining living parental figure, who might I add was the one of the two major triggers to his overblot, is going to send him into an emotional turmoil that’ll go over as well as a hurricane that rains fire. 

He would do literally anything to make you love him in turn, nothing was impossible to him. But much to his This is impossible for him. Either he picks you and has to lose his father, or picks his father and has to lose his chance of having your love back. His horn could be chipped or completely intact, regardless the weather is going to be gloomy for a few weeks as he mulls over his decision. 

He’ll try to argue some compromises. Compromises like ‘Lilia still travels for long periods, so you won’t have to deal with him everyday’, or ‘He’ll make sure that you don’t interact’ but as you refuse him more and more, sticking to your guns, he starts to feel very powerless because he can’t choose either of you. 

Until he isn’t. 

Let’s not forget Malleus is the fourth strongest mage in the world. That comes with the disadvantage for you of him being limited by only his imagination. If you won’t be happy with him if Lilia’s around, why not just get rid of that problem by, simply, erasing your discomfort from your memory?

Then he wins and has the best of both worlds, you and Lilia and no more of that unnecessary choice. Isn’t that great?

Silver’s a little worse off here, having to pick between the fae that raised him, who up until you he loved more than anything in the world; and you, the person he loves more than anything in the world and will continue to love more than anything in the world. 

Obviously, he’s going to be upset. Not angry, just upset. Being forced to pick between his father and you is a choice he doesn’t want to make, because he loves you both and doesn’t want to lose either of you. 

So insert common gaslighting technique called ✨Downplaying ✨

Listen, Silver is a green flag yandere that’s slowly turning into a red one. But if you put him in the middle of a war between having an unwilling you and his dad or having a willing you alone, he’d rather have both instead of one. 

So instead of picking sides, he’s going to justify it by saying that it’s not as bad as you think it is. Lilia’s the one he went to about advice for wooing you, so whatever his father is doing that creeps you out Silver will justify that it’s just Lilia trying to help him show his love for you. He’ll make excuses for his father all day long if he has to, Silver’s not giving up either of you if he can help it. 

Oh, and by the way, he’s going to tell Lilia about this. Expect that Lilia is going to be less hard on you, not just because Silver asked him to but your cooperation makes Silver happy, so he’ll give you that inch. Don’t try to take the mile. 

Sebek isn’t upset, more outraged.

His utmost respect for Lilia makes him believe that he knows best, so the fact that you’re discomforted by his presence to the point where you don’t want to be around him is a sign of disrespect so blatant that he can’t stand it. 

Strap in for a 2+ hour lecture about you should be honoured to be even his presence, because who do you think advised him on how to give you the love and respect (within the already too broad yandere boundaries but still) that you deserve. 

Look, Sebek is aware of your discomfort. If it’s so bad that it’s something that’s going to threaten your relationship together then, he will separate you in a way you might not like.

That is him locking you in his dorm room, and not letting you out. You won’t be able to interact with Lilia if you can’t ever be in the same room as him. And while he’s going to hate doing it, he will bite his tongue and ask Lilia to stay out of his dorm just to make you happy. 

Bonus~

Lilia thinks that your attempts at getting rid of him are amusing. He knew they were never going to work, they tell him about everything and when they’re too blinded by their love for you to actually take you for themselves he helps them with that too.

So obviously when they came to him for advice, or rather raving about how disrespectful you were being for Sebek, about how you were willing to be with them if he wasn’t around, he would of course give them whatever advice they’d need.

But for once, Lilia doesn’t feel as if this is something to punish you for. You’re young and since you don’t mind being around them if he’s not there, perhaps it’s just because you’re hoping for a different type of love to bloom. And what would be the point of all his efforts if he didn’t give you time alone for a garden to be seeded. 

Of course, he’ll advise his boys as such and he could stand to travel again, to give you and whoever you were paired with the privacy you needed, but don’t expect him to never return. He wouldn’t mind returning to the sound of a newborn crying.

[esotericbluntbaby]

HIIIII i love your writing style so bad, i came on here to request something and then i see you doubt your own writing which is crazy cuz they're all good!!! can i request hamzah and reader in something worse than a situationship so she brings out like someone attractive along at a party or something (it could literally be a gay man that offered to help her idk) to see if it'd make him jealous and it actually does. IM SORRY if you get too mant jealous hamzah requests but i just yearn for him, PLS have angst in the beginning 😭😭🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼.

worsened aches

hamzahthefantastic x reader

description: though toxic and envious, you realize that your situationship had to have gone through the worst in order to better itself for the sake of you and hamzah.

mentions: angst (expect it at this point), yearning, posessiveness, toxicity in a situationship out of confusion, she/her pronouns, both hamzah and reader are equally mean to each other so hopefully it cancels out, a guy making you uncomfortable and grabbing your hand, a fight scene, happy ending, sfw for the most part

listen to partynextdoor while you're reading lol. specifically make it to the morning or resentment but honestly any will do <3

--

"you're literally fucking crazy- what are you talking about?"

you and hamzah were currently going at it like two players on rival teams. though your relationship, or lack there of, was toxic and overly complicated, you both stayed in the same rooms you fought in because of the loneliness that consumed the both of you. obviously, arguing wasn't fun, nor was it ethical for the sake of your mental health, yet, bickering with someone else was somehow better than spending your nights alone and depressed.

you met hamzah because of how loud he was. you were, and still are, his neighbor who moved in a couple months ago. getting annoyed of the lack of sleep, you decided to march over to his apartment in the same manner that the guardsmen stomp in front of the royal palace; they had the queen to defend, while you had your sanity to fight for. over time, the friendship and simultaneous rivalry stemmed from that night and bloomed into the situationship you have right now.

you and hamzah technically aren't anything; technically, you and hamzah are nothing more than just friends who occasionally act coupley to fill the voids that call you to jump out of windows and balconies. you both were lonely, creating a seemingly win-win situation. he comes over whenever he needs someone to cuddle at night, or more than cuddle, and vice versa. it's been a system that's worked out for about eight-ish months now.

as all situationships do, it was bound to crash and tumble like hurricanes over the ocean. over time, the lack of a label caused more problems than einstein could sold. neither of you had a complete understanding of the boundaries you each wanted, nor did either of you want to risk creating a more serious problem than what it seemed to be by talking about it. so, over time, resentment built itself up within the foundations of the connection between the both of you as communication began to settle in the roots of the ground it was built on.

the night started alright; it was simple making out, occasional pecks on the cheeks and forehead, and constant physical touch. he even bought you food and fed it to you while you two sat on the couch and watched comfort movies. your presence was enjoyed as much as his was. it was normal that whenever hamzah was over, you'd completely lose sight of the bad parts of the connection you have after any part of him would touch you. however, the mood quickly changed when hamzah answered the call of another girl while on your couch. watching his smile expand at her words as you were cuddled up right beside him caused a pit to grow within your chest. it felt wrong. technically, given that you two were friends, it wasn't; however, the fact that he was all over you two seconds before you both heard the ringtone was, in fact, wrong. you moved away, distancing mountains and seas between you two on his couch, as eventually the call became silent and he hung up. you wouldn't speak to him. growing annoyed, he forced you to speak, to which you called him an asshole for "damn near flirting with a girl in front of you." thus, his gaslighting begun.

"hamzah, what do you mean, 'what's wrong with me?' what's wrong with you?"

he scoffed, "fucking nothing. nothing even happened- i have no clue what you're talking about. why are you making something out of nothing?"

"that's so fucking mature. you told me to talk, didn't you? or did i just make something out of nothing again?"

"oh my god, that's not what i meant- dude, why are you even mad? it's not like i did anything."

you raised your eyebrows, "my head was literally on your lap while you were flirting with her."

he slowly emphasized his words, "i wasn't even flirting with her."

"you made your voice deep like you were fuckin' neil degrasse tyson, are you joking? and what the hell was she saying that was making you laugh that hard?"

he put his hands up in defense, "it's not a big deal. so what if jess called me and i laughed when she told me a fuckin joke? it's not that deep."

your body felt like it was rising in temperature, "you're actually such a liar- we both know that it was that deep, bro. that's literally how you laugh with me."

"why does it matter if that's how i laugh with you?" he made a noise between a laugh and scoff and looked back at the television, "it's not like we're dating."

he was right. you weren't dating, so you can't be upset. you knew you mostly wanted that reassurance that he wouldn't find someone else while messing with you on the side, though you assumed that hamzah wasn't like that. you've had the run down of a bad dating history and horrible ex's and, yeah, hamzah was kind of bad. however, hamzah was bad in a way where at least it was to your face, unlike the infidelity and lies in your past relationships. unlike them, the worst that hamzah would do was get defensive over an argument or say something that was a little too mean on accident because he was genuinely just speaking his mind. honestly, the touch and treatment he gave you during the times you weren't bitchy towards each other evened out the slight toxicity; actually, even surpassing it. however, this was too far. this was a lie and you knew it. it was a lie that he specifically told to hurt you on purpose.

sure, maybe you could've gone a different direction with confronting him and maybe you were too aggressive with your accusations; but at the same time, you were also hurt that he would do that in front of you, as your head rested a couple of inches away from his heartbeat. the intimacy of the setting the both of you were in was overtaken by a green bogeyman; envy in its personified form.

the room fell silent as he kept on watching the movie. he only looked at you when you sniffled from tearing up so much. you guys have argued in the past, but never have you cried in front of him; this was vulnerability that you allowed to seep through you like sunlight seeps through the roots of a plant.

his attention was now fully on you, "are you crying?"

"hamzah, i want you to get out of my place."

"wait-"

you stood up and began to walk through the door, "let yourself out the door and don't come back. i'm done."

--

three weeks without him had passed and you were an emotional wreck; a wreck that was so bad that other cars on the road had to stop to see it for themselves. throughout the stages of grief, you were currently on the acceptance stage. you hadn't left you apartment ever since that night out of fear that he'd be leaving his, next door. a couple of times, you heard the knock that you two made for each other to signify that it was the other person at the door. with each knuckle to the wood, a pang in your heart thumped harder and with more rigor. luckily, it only lasted a total of a week before he stopped coming over.

since any romantic encounter or even simple things around your house reminded you of the man next door, you were going to continue to rot in bed whilst watching horror movies. however, the plan was quickly changed when rey, the gay man you met at a club a couple of months ago, decided to text you.

rey :p

5:42 pm | hey boo

5:42 pm | i haven't talked to you in forever

5:42 pm | how r u?

you

5:43 pm | im horrible

5:43 pm | u rmbr the guy i used to talk to u about

rey :p

5:44 pm | the one that was ur bf but also not ur bf?

5:44 pm | like the one that u showed me a pic of and i said he had the same eyes as central cee

you

5:44 pm | yeah

rey :p

5:44 pm | what'd the bitch do

you

5:45 pm | he was genuinely being an asshole

5:45 pm | he literally picked up the phone right

rey :p

5:45 pm | mhmmm

you

5:46 pm | it was a girl

5:46 pm | i was laying my head down on his lap

5:46 pm | and i guess she was the funniest person in the world or smth bc he was laughing his ass off like a fucking idiot

rey :p

5:46 pm | bro hell no

5:46 pm | r u serious

5:47 pm | r u okay

you

5:47 pm | bedrotting lowk lol

5:47 pm | haven't gotten out of my bed in like a full three days

5:48 pm | idk i guess i js miss him

rey :p

5:48 pm | it's reasonable

5:48 pm | im going to a party tn

5:48 pm | come with meeeeee

5:48 pm | maybe u just need a distraction

you

5:49 pm | idk rey

rey :p

5:50 pm | go get dressed and pls shower dont be stinky

5:50 pm | ill pick u up at like uhhhh 8ish

you

5:50 pm | fine

--

you were two drinks down when rey was only tipsy from one drink. being the designated driver, he didn't want to overdo it; yet, he reassured you that he'd take care of you throughout the night. you were simply enjoying his presence; however, given that it was his friends' party that he was going to, occasionally you were left by yourself leaning on walls or sitting on couches and getting up when a couple started to make out on the leather right next to you. after a while, you began to regret going; the more you were alone, the more you thought about how hamzah would be towering over you like some sort of bodyguard in order to make sure that nobody spiked your drink.

as you were zoned out and thinking about him once again, you suddenly came into focus when rey went up to you and gave you a side hug. confused, your eyebrows furrowed as you looked up at him.

"are you thinking about him again?" rey asked, taking another sip of his seltzer.

you sighed, "is it that obvious?"

"if you wanna go home, i can take you. i'm sorry if i pushed you too hard to go out- i just didn't want you to stay home crying over some boy."

"no, yea, i get it. thank you, really, maybe i just needed to go outside. are you ready to go home?"

"i was just gonna drop you off and come back."

you didn't want to seem like a burden; rey was only trying to help you with coping. to have to drive a whole thirty minutes just to drop you off and come back seemed like too much to ask for; after everything that happened with hamzah when it came to begging for communication and reassurance, you hated seeming like you had too much to ask for. so, you took a deep breath and began to brave the waters even more; this was new territory for you that you were now forcing yourself to become familiar with for the rest of the night.

"no, it's okay. i'll stay- i kinda don't wanna be alone," you half-lied.

he put his hand on your shoulder reassuringly, "are you sure?"

"yeah," you sipped the vodka cranberry out of your red solo cup, "i'm sure.

"well," he began to give you a hug with his back facing the front entrance, "if you do wanna leave, tell me."

you hugged him back, "i will. thanks, rey."

unwrapping his arms from you, he walked in the direction of the party as you still stood near the entrance. however, you soon realized that his body was blocking the very sight you tried your best to avoid; hamzah was standing right in front of the doorway, dressed in one of the outfits that made you weak. standing with his friends, his hard expression fixated on you as he realized that some other guy was on you the way that he was. you locked eye contact, sensing the tense gaze he scorned towards you. you decided that it was time to go to the bathroom.

--

sitting on the cold tile for about twenty minutes helped ground you to the reality of your situation. you came to this party hoping to escape the emotions that he made you feel after basking and bathing in them for the past three weeks, however, the same guy appeared right in front of you at the worst time possible. you could go one of two ways: go bother rey and make him drive thirty minutes to and back from your house just to drop you off, or to stay in the bathroom.

considering that someone knocked on the bathroom door as you were pondering, you decided to choose neither of the options and chose a secret, third one: to stay so that rey can enjoy his night.

leaving the bathroom into a relatively empty hallway, you felt an odd stare as you walked past a tall man holding a beer in his hand. you heard and felt his heavy footsteps right behind you, trailing after you in the dark area. you started to walk quicker towards the end of the hallway, reaching the entrance to it that led to the living room where a couple of groups of people were.

"where are you going, pretty lady?" you heard from behind you.

you ignored him, finding his remarks uncomfortable and weird.

you felt his breath on your neck, "y'know, it's rude to ignore a man who's interested in you."

"leave me alone," you sternly demanded.

"what, are you a fucking prude or something?" he asked, grabbing your wrist.

"what the fuck? let go of me, now," you warned as his grip on you tightened, causing your heart to drop all the way to your bladder.

suddenly, he was being pulled off of you and pounded into by someone's fists so fast that it could possibly beat the speed of light; you could tell by the way that the figure punched that it was hamzah. you didn't even see him in the room before he was on the floor with the man from the hallway. you stood there, motionless with worry for hamzah's physical being, as people attempted to intervene and pull hamzah off of him. you watched as hamzah was pried off of him by martin, scolding him and asking him what he was doing. luckily, the man simply left the area and hamzah went into the bathroom, alone.

luckily, the room went back to the usual conversations relatively quick, since it lasted a couple of punches thrown in by hamzah; in addition, a couple of people were staring at you as you yelled at him to let go of your arm. you didn't know how to feel. what if he didn't get him off of you? would you have gotten assaulted? or even worse? however, those thoughts also simultaneously existed with thoughts of how hamzah got there so quick and why he just pummeled a guy into the floor, even after you two weren't on good terms. nevertheless, you went against your goal of avoiding anything hamzah-related and walked to the bathroom.

knocking on the door, he took a minute to turn the knob. he saw you in front of him and gazed at you with an expression that you haven't seen on him before; a mixture of everything felt tonight and, possibly, for the past three weeks. you got a good look at how his eyebags were more protruded as if the skin had a second layer. his eyebags mixed with the lilac and ruby shades mixed in led you to believe that he was struggling to sleep; it was as if you were looking at a mirror.

"can i come in?" you asked.

though you realize that this is stunting your ability to heal, his voice was comforting, "yeah, sure."

he sat down on the closed toilet, as you sat down on the rim of the bathtub besides it. he stared at his hand, bruises and redness already forming on his knuckles, as well as an open gash on his ring finger. you got up from the bathtub rim and crouched over to the cabinet below the sink, watching his eyes linger onto you as you searched for something to clean out his would and wrap it. taking out a roll of bandage and wound cleaner, you sat back down. you gently took his hand in yours and began to clean his wound.

"this might hurt," you mumbled.

you squeezed the wound cleaner as he winced, a sour expression with his eyebrows scrunched on his face apparent. you began to wrap his hand, trying your best to be as gentle as possible. you still felt his eyes on you, like you were a puppet performing in front of an audience.

you broke the silence, "are you drunk?"

"what?"

"y'know, have you drank anything since you got here."

"oh- no, no i haven't."

you ripped the end of the bandage off, attempting to tie it onto his hand, "so, you beat his ass completely sober?"

he chuckled, "yeah."

"it was stupid."

he gave you a look of disbelief, "what?"

"hamzah, you could've hurt yourself! what if he had a knife on him or a gun or just something-"

"you're telling me that i'm stupid for getting a guy, who was clearly making you uncomfortable, off of you?"

you sighed, "no, hamzah, you're not stupid. i'm saying that your actions were stupid because you could've gotten seriously hurt and i don't want to be the reason you're in the hospital. i don't want you to get hurt at all."

"well, would he have done it?"

puzzled, you tilted your head to the side, "who?"

"the- fuckin- the guy you were with- him- would he have done this for you?"

a chuckle of disbelief escaped from your throat, "why does that matter?"

"i saw him hugging you and shit, he should've done what i did- where was he when you needed him? why'd he let you go to the bathroom by yourself?"

"why does it matter if he was hugging me, hamzah? why does it matter if he left me alone?"

"because if you're gonna replace me with him, he has to be better than me!" his voice got slightly louder, causing you to jump, "fuck- if we're not together anymore, you have to find someone that could take care of you as well as i did or even better."

your eyes squinted with annoyance, "hamzah, you literally just said that we were just friends. what are you talking about 'we're not together anymore?' you were the one who said that we weren't ever together."

"i fucking lied, okay? i lied. i fucking lied to you because i can't handle the fact that you wanted more and i- i just- i can't be enough for you," he rushed as the information in his head that he wanted to let out was twice as fast as his words, "i wanted more too. fuck, i wanted more so fucking bad- you don't get it, but i'd be selfish if i just took you all for myself even if i couldn't give you everything that you deserve."

emotions began to implode within your chest, "are you serious? you could've fucking tried or, better yet, you could've just talked to me, hamzah! genuinely, what the hell are you even talking about with that 'i couldn't give you everything' shit. i don't want everything, i just wanted you."

your breathing became heavier as tears began to flow out of your eyes once more, mirroring the scene at your apartment that lead to this very encounter. though you laid in bed for three weeks, you didn't cry once, not ever since the time you last cried in front of him. every single fear was running rampant in your head from speaking to him with such vulnerability. yet, you soon realized that there was no point of holding back. he was already watching you intently and listening to every single word you were saying, gazing at you with longing eyes that yearned the longer you were sat in the bathroom. there was no turning back now, so you decided to tell him everything that you've been feeling and thinking in the past three weeks of agonizing heartbreak with one, singular sentence. with breaths heavy within your chest and tears now streaming down your face, you let go.

"hamzah, i just want you."

in that moment, hamzah saw the heartbreak in personified, human form. he watched you crumple apart in front of him like balls of paper about to be thrown into a trash can. hamzah went into the situationship with the thought that it would be the best possible outcome; the outcome where there's no mess to clean up, nor promises to keep, nor expectations to maintain. the situationship was, in his eyes, a way to keep you both from being hurt. knowing that his very intention was to not hurt you at all, as he watched you crying your eyes out in front of him, finally caused the the realization that he was supporting the very cause he was against.

hamzah didn't know what to do, yet, he knew he had to make this right for the sake of you, him, and the connection between you two.

hamzah lifted you up onto his lap, unsure and hesitant, watching your reaction to his actions. watching the tears on your face slowly stop sliding down and your breathing get slightly lighter, he believed it was okay. he wiped your face with his thumbs with such gentleness to it; in hamzah's mind, he has broken you down to the point where there's cracks in your skin, so he was trying his best not to shatter you completely. after gazing at your eyes with a sympathetic, longing, and apologetic stare, he gently brought your face closer towards his. he closed the gap between you guys' lips, a wave of nostalgia and comfort overtaking the vulnerability that was just in the room. over time, the kiss got more desperate and aching. your lips chased after each other as your tongues moves synchronously with the same feelings of past despair and hopelessness. your hands were roaming up and down each other's bodies as if it was meant to be explored by each other; as if you were both artifacts meant to be excavated. it lasted fifteen minutes; the passion radiated from you guys' bodies even after you stopped kissing to breathe. hamzah was the first to speak.

"i know you came here with a date, but i can't take it anymore. i need you in my life, baby, i need you back and i need you back now. the past couple weeks i haven't been sleeping or eating or doing anything besides just sitting there and realizing that i'm a fucking idiot. i never liked the girl that i was on the phone with and i blocked her right after i left your place, that night. i don't even know what i was doing and i shouldn't have even picked up in the first place- i should have never said we were just friends. i was lying. i was a fucking liar and you can do whatever you want to make me pay for that. you can slap me as hard as you can or burn my hoodies or anything, baby, just-please forgive me, i'm sorry. i'll do anything to have you back in my life-"

you cut him off with a slow, gentle, and lingering kiss, once again. pulling away, he admired you like he was in a trance that he wasn't willing to be broken out of.

"i'm not dating rey. he's here with another guy."

hamzah looked puzzled as he rubbed loving circles onto your thighs, "what?"

"he's gay."

"thank fucking god," he let out a sigh of relief, "i think i felt my heart genuinely shatter when i walked in on him hugging you."

you laughed, "you were that hurt over it?"

"of course i'd be. it's you."

"yeah, yeah, don't flatter me," you teased.

hamzah's expressione turned serious once again, "baby, please come back to me. i'll make it all up to you if you let me, i promise. i don't care how long it takes or what i'll have to do. let me prove to you that i can take care of you."

your expression also became serious, "it depends. are you taking care of me as my idiot neighbor who occasionally comes over to do things that friends don't do?"

you asked the question expecting him to answer that he'll do better than that, however, he surprised you once again.

he took your hand and kissed it, "no, i'll take care of you as your boyfriend, if you'll let me."

--

authors note!

hi guys this is so late i am going to bed goodnight!

[joyceyayo]

Stanford & Stanley Pines NSFW alphabet pt. 2

A/n again, ts is dirty asf so heed this warning

M = Motivation (what turns them on,

gets them going)

Ford: Definitely intelligence. Nothing turns him on more than when you correct or prove him wrong about a topic he thought he knew everything about. Something that if anyone else were to do, he’d be highly annoyed.

Stan: he honestly doesn’t know. The weirdest shit turns him on, like you doing laundry or blow drying your hair, he was told the spontaneous erections would fade with his youth, and that was partly true. But with you, he finds himself just going about his day, and then he is filled with need for you just from witnessing a mundane task.

N = No (something they wouldn't do,

turn offs)

Ford: To be honest, I think he, unfortunately, would reel it in if you called him daddy. He just never identified with that and finds the connotations odd. He’d think about it way too literally.

Stan: do not touch his ass, please. He doesn’t even want to elaborate; if you ask him to, it makes him uncomfortable. You respect this, as there are many other, better things to do with him that he’d enthusiastically jump at. I don’t think he’d mind anal on you, though 😭

O = Oral (preference in giving or

receiving, skill, etc.)

Ford: Oh, brother, don’t get me started. Ford's general preference is to eat you out. He’ll spend a good while doing it, at least 20-30 minutes, building you up so that it's life-changing when you finally come on his face. Though that’s not saying, he’s against your lips around his shaft. It’s one of the only things that will make him really moan loudly.

Stan: Stan will NOT get his face between the legs of a girl he is not dating. He’s gotta know where that thing is going. But when he gets down there, you’re in for it ;) A bit hypocritical again because he doesn’t care where their mouth has been; he’ll take a blowjob within 15 minutes of meeting a woman.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow

and sensual? etc.)

Ford: Slow and steady wins the race, he says. But he’ll do a sprint at the end. The most sensual lay you’ll ever have.

Stan: very rough and speedy with it, rutting into you. You never mind it, though, as he’s good at it. And he always found a way to be romantic despite this.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies,

how often, etc.)

Ford: He makes his schedule and determines that he will take the free time to turn you out. He likes to take his time with you; usually, your foreplay lasts about an hour. He’s up in age, so a little time to get him going does wonders.

Stan: when he was younger, he would go crazy for fucking a girl he’d just met in a state he had just arrived at behind a bar for 10 minutes. And if you’re with him in his younger years, you get your fair share of that energy, trust me. But as he got older, he saw the value in long lovemaking sessions. He took his time with each curve and gave every inch special attention, something he could never do with those quickies. But even in his older years, his soul will leave his body if you quickly ride him while he’s pulled over in the Stan mobile. And he doesn't see that going away.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment?)

Ford: he wants to make you happy and is willing to try anything in the bedroom once. And you will have risky sex if you like it. But he can also place boundaries on what he really can’t be doing. He enjoys vanilla, mundane sex. And doesn’t see the appeal of fucking your lifelong partner in the Greasy’s Diner bathroom.

Stan: Again, he loved to experiment when he was younger, but now he likes to stick to what he knows. Which is a lot. But he also just wants to see you happy, and if it’s sexy, he’ll do it.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they

go for? how long do they last?)

Ford: one, but there’s a good amount of foreplay. He likes to make you cum and warm you up before he fills you. And he makes that one round count, making you lose your mind in those 15 intense minutes.

Stan: he can still do at most two if you’re down. But he’ll be winded. If you’re with him when he’s younger, then he’s wild asf, having insane stamina.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use

them? on a partner or themselves?)

Ford: he owns toys. But he prefers to make them and has only bought them to see the technology inside to replicate. When he makes his own, he can personalize precisely what will make you feel good, and he blows your mind every time. There’s a quality in his toys that you can’t get with store-bought ones, and you appreciate this luxury.

Stan: he never really owned toys and doesn’t see the appeal of a vibrator. He says it’s nothing he can’t do with his hands, and you can’t disagree. But if you wanted to experiment with one, he’d gladly oblige.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

Ford: he’s very sweet during sex and doesn’t like to hold your pleasure over you head. He just wants to make you feel good and associate him with that. But he’ll jokingly tease you if you’re overly eager, but he won’t hold out.

Stan: he will tease occasionally if he’s not desperate enough, though oftentimes, he is. But he’ll knowingly go painfully slow while removing your clothes and kissing down your body. But he’s just too lazy and needy for you to go past that.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what

sounds they make, etc.)

Ford: I wouldn’t say he’s loud, but he’s a lot quiet. And his noises are closer to soft whimpers and moans than grunts. Though he does occasionally let one of those out

Stan: he is very loud; I imagine a lot of dirty talk. But he groans and grunts like crazy, making it known how good you’re feeling for him.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for

the character)

Ford: is constantly making little gadgets to make your life and hobbies easier. He unconsciously observes you because that’s what he does all day and applies that to whatever side project he’s working on

Stan: not even really a headcanon because it’s known this man is STRONG. But he lifts you with no problem and always does it. Like you’ll be doing your own thing, and he’ll lift you off your feet and bring you wherever, usually the bedroom 😉

X = X-ray (let's see what's going on

under those clothes)

Ford: very lean and chiseled from years of combat, and grey hair sprinkled everywhere. I imagine a little happy trail and well-trimmed but a good amount of curly hair around his dick.

Stan: has broad shoulders and a bit of a beer belly. He also has a lot of hair, especially on his chest and down his arms. He probably has unruly pubes but nothing anyone can’t get past.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex

drive?)

Ford: It was higher than he ever knew after he met you. He always was so interested (in the same way he was interested in anomalies and such) in the way couples were seemingly addicted to each other and couldn’t keep their hands off. While he only really thought about sex when he met a nice girl. But once he met you, he understood. He wanted to fuck you day and night and couldn’t get enough.

Stan: very high. He almost devours you when he isn’t able to have you for over 24 hours. It’s almost unnatural for a man of his age to be so sexually driven all the time, but the comments are never-ending. He’s always willing to take you to the bedroom…. Or the shower, or the car, or anywhere

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep

afterwards)

Ford: he doesn’t sleep a lot. So he usually gets you any amenities: tea, coffee, extra blankets, and a cuddle. But he usually likes to admire you sleeping naked on the sheets.

Stan: right after. Like a light. After he comes, he rolls over and maybe has the rest of his beer or a cigarette. But he usually pulls you onto his chest and knocks right out.

A/n lol I tried to make this one quickly so enjoy

[noxturnalmoth]

What Could Have Been

Summary: Silco, the Eye of Zaun, the Industrialist, was first and foremost a son of Zaun who wanted his motherland free. After an altercation in which his adopted daughter shot him in a fit of rage, he is left dying while the world goes on without him. His life's work and ideals soon trampled to nothing as his memory fades from the world. But what if he was saved?

Warnings: Canon violence

Word Count: 8,744

Masterlist: here

Chapter 3 - From Ruins

It was hard for Silco to not fidget and be uncomfortable at the prospect of letting his daughter and his old life go, it was understandable for the man who tried desperately to have it all to let go of all that he built. Of the one whom he loved. And he was cold, trying to find his way in the dark, walking way ahead of you so the light of your waning candle can't illuminate his way. In a way it was commendable, his determination in healing and rebuilding on his own, but it was also way too reminiscent of your own refusals at each and every proposals for help. You two were two sides of the same coins, one frigid and sharp, the other searing yet soft, and no matter how clipped his words could be the understanding you had of him only grew, and so did the care. At first it had been because he was a Zaunite, but as he shared your life it came to be because you genuinely wanted him to finally own something, build something, that would remain. Something that'd make him happy. Because underneath the wit, the short sentences, the cold shoulder, the narrowed eyes, the tense face and the semi permanent snarl, you could see a glimpse of the man he could be.

It was always for simple things like dinner ready for you after work, your appartment cleaned in your absence, a glass of alcohol and a cigarette set on the table on longer days, and when you woke up in the mornings your body was always covered in a blanket. You didn't know whether it was to appologize for his words and behavior, to show he did want to change or out of gratitude for you respecting his boundaries and saving him, but you'd wager it was a little bit of everything. So in kind, you'd take time to get his shimmer when it ran out, made him breakfast, always were patient when you saw him struggling with kindness, and always respected his need for a certain distance unless he approached you first. It was a song and dance you were used to in a way, most of the Undercity were hurt and fearful, and befriending any of them could prove complex, it was something you even did with yourself. Struggling to be kind, to rest, to respect and even appreciate yourself was a sad truth you had to live on the daily although you were more than happy to give that treatment to others, Silco struggled with both and so the dance was that much slower. More like careful steps approaching a small animal that a waltz.

But as the second month of his presence in your life passed, as his body was done healing, you found yourself not minding the pace. You didn't know whether you could earn his friendship or not, yet you knew that he was warming up to you from how he came downstairs to eat with you in the mornings and evenings instead of eating alone, because his voice echoed more often from within your quaint home. No matter if his tone was the same no nonsense drawl, he spoke more and it's all that mattered. But you could see that he was getting antsy, the books you had in your bookshelf almost all read, the appartment cleaned all too often and you found him switching from the armchairs to the couch, the kitchen, the bed and pace himself into the floor. So you decided that since he wished to stay you could introduce him to a more productive way to spend his days.

"Silco, I was thinking."

"Don't hurt yourself." His rumbling words make you scoff.

"Very funny mister One Eyed Wonder. Anyways, I've noticed you were going a bit stir crazy, so I was wondering if you'd like to come to work with me. An extra pair of hands would be more than welcome."

And it was true, having to prepare everything in advance all the time yet still have to move to get the necessary materials as you soldered, chiselled, hammered, smelted and more, was time consuming along with the deliveries and taking care of the counter. You knew about Silco being an ex miner from words on the streets as a child, describing the leaders of a new revolutionary movement as "diggers", yet one of them being as thin as a sheet of aluminum. As the movement grew and so did its influence, Silco was no longer seen as a "dirty little thing" but as a stubborn, determined, infinitely clever, agile, fast and deceptively strong man, using his body frame to overtake any enemy undermining him. You guessed that he should have retained a bit of his strength, if not from his past, to keep himself ready for a fight that could happen at any moment.

"And what would you have me do exactly?"

"Take orders, help me deliver them, look at the ledgers, it would help me to have all of my focus on smithing and i'd be able to make stuff quicker and better. At least consider it, it would do you good to get out of here and do something."

"You'd have me work with people? You do know that if anyone of my previous..." He pauses. " ...collegues..." The word is said with bitter disdain. "Discovers I'm here, they'll come to wreak havoc."

That was indeed a possibility, the Chem Barons sniffing his trail from a whisper in the street and coming to get him, for good this time. But if that happened you knew that their goons would have nothing against you, barely trained buffoons with an empty brain the lot of them, that much you knew from fighting them. And Zaunite pride, thank Janna for it, would prevent them from trying anything like mercenaries for someone like Silco. Because although he had lost his empire, he was still more astute and way more intelligent than them, and he was still strong, that much was guessed from his grabs on your throat and hands when he had first woken up, and that had been when he was at his weakest so you couldn't fathom your strength now. Plus your little hole in the wall community was loyal beyond expectation, you knew that they'd understand and welcome him if he pulled his weight.

"I know, but I also know that they'd still be too scared of you even after your fall from grace." You reach inside your pocket and pull an eyepatch, a leather triangle doubled with some soft fabric on the inside while one long string escaped its upper right side and the bottom angle to be tied around his head. "I'm no seamstress but I made you this at work during lunch"

He hums in surprise, this teal eye growing darker as his lid falls to cover half of it. He inspects it, hands brushing the leather and strings, caressing the inside of the eyepatch and bending the item to test its durability.

"Do you think me that unsightly?" His voice clips.

"No. I'm just scared the heat and fumes would make your eye hurt. I know you kept your eye out as a symbol and a method of intimidation but you have no need for it anymore, you can prioritise comfort over your façade Silco."

You sigh and lean yourself on your elbows and smile a little bit with a tilt of your head.

"Plus the eyepatch would make you look rugged in my opinion." You huff out a laugh. "Beware the tall blacksmith's assistant, they say if you take away the leather covering him, his gaze will steal your soul." You muse teasingly while wiggling your fingers, your first attempt at such a quip leaving you slightly nervous at how he would take it.

But instead of the scraping of the chair and his retreating form upstairs like you expected, you see silco put on the eyepatch, a scoff shaking his chest. And after properly tying the knot behind his face, he slides a hand through the crown of his head, placing strands that had fallen out of their usual slick back in their original place.

"Maybe so. But the grey flesh would still scare people away."

"I don't think so. Everyone's got scars here Silco, no matter how they look or if they're visible at all." You reassure softly, smile growing at seeing him don your contraption. "Plus makeup would melt in the heat, trust me I've tried. It would look patchy and horrible after a good half hour."

He nods, his hand brushing through his hair again. His good eye narrowing once more in thought. His old clothes had been discarded, the blood ruining them, he was wearing some clothes you that had been given by your landlord, his oldest son growing much taller than this before he moved out. They were simple and classic Zaunite fashion. High waisted black cargo pants with a thigh harness on his right leg, combat boots, a cropped maroon turtleneck sweater that missed its left sleeve and showed part of his stomach, a fingerless glove covering the rest of his arm up until half way through the bicep. The covered arm also harboring a fingerless glove yet only wrist high, his chest adorned with a harness that surrounded his ribs and upper stomach in two belts with a strap on each side stretched vertically to reach the lower belt behind him, passing through the upper one. He had a cropped leather jacket draped over the back of the chair he sat in, it closed with belts and the collar was a similar maroon to his shirt. All in all, he looked less like a Piltovan like before and more like a classic Zaunite, if anything the new clothes fit him even more, made him look younger. It was as if you had gotten a glimpse of Silco's younger self without needing to look into the past. Dark hair peppering with streaks of silver at the temples and a few on the crown of his head, the eyepatch hiding the fire and ash of his left eye, the few wrinkles, his eyebags and the marred side of his face in a discolored, fleshy gray were the only clue of his age being any different.

And they looked good on him if you said so yourself. And so you did.

"You don't look half bad for an old grump." At least in a way that wouldn't feel like pity or a slight to him.

"You're one to talk, you reek of sweat and look like a drowned Sump rat." You chuckle at that and tilt your head "touché" escaping your lips to agree with the man, but you feel your technique has worked. His shoulders were a little more relaxed, a little taller, as he crossed his legs, a cigarette now held between his lips as he slid the packet to you.

"So when would you have me come in?"

"When do you want to come?"

He hums pensively, lighter flicking to let the flame nip at the end of the cylinder held in his mouth, a deep inhale following as you take a cigarette of your own and light it aswell.

"Tomorrow?"

"It works for me." You exhale, a ring of smoke floating above you as you tilt your head back. "Thanks for the meal by the way."

He didn't seem like he ate much, but after two months together you realized that he probably didn't have much time for it aswell as sleep, and the meals and rest he got here were the best he had gotten in years. His natural coldness melting down to a simple façade and letting you think about the wonders of a stressless life. Now your own was not stress free at all, so many hurdles with orders, missing materials, broken equipment, plus the deliveries, rent, and people always asking for you to fix things at their homes and prices for materials always climbing. But you know that Silco had the weight of the entire city of Zaun on his back as the leader of the Chem Barons, but also of his own territory, and shimmer creation and export, aswell as god knows how many other schemes along with the constant target on his back and a child. He probably hadn't known a real meal or night of sleep since forever, and you're glad that the metaphorical new him indulged in those, enjoying larger meals and longer nights. And you don't know how or why, but he cooked pretty well for a cantankerous old man, but then again he did have a daughter. Which made you smile at the thought of him preparing meals for a small blue haired girl, the kid sitting near him and talking his ear off or humming as he cooked.

"What are you smiling about, pet?"

"Ew. Never call me that again." You make a face and snort out a laugh. "And nothing, just happy you're less of a grouchy fossil."

"I'll choke you in your sleep."

"That's underhanded." You lean forward on the table, eyes gleaming. "Coward."

"Pissant."

You act offended and look at his narrowed eye, shining in something you could almost call mirth. "I thought you were a gentleman!"

"We've both established that man is gone. Plus I'm just calling it how I see it." His lips stretch from their usual natural sneer, a small cocky smirk adorning his face. "You're a pissant, so I call you as such. What else should I refer you as?"

"Your hero, your knight in shining armor, the Sump queen..." You list jokingly and he rolls his eye, legs uncrossing as he stubs out his cigarette before he stands up, sauntering to the stairs as he always does when he goes to rest. "Night, Silco."

He hums back, a hand lifts in a lazy wave as he climbs up the stairs and you roll your shoulders, lazily smoking the remnant of your own tobacco, the taste and smell relaxing you. The rest of the night is a blur then, a shower, and throwing yourself on your couch, your back groaning aswell as the furniture, two months in a row of this sleeping arrangement was wrecking your back but the man did deserve rest. A revolutionary from his teens to his...how old even was he? "Maybe I'll ask him one day" you think to yourself, curling up on your side away from the window. You disliked sleep, you wished you didn't, but your nights were always filled with the smell, taste and sight of blood, the loud cheering, the monochrome colors cut by splatters of red. Your head was your own personal hell, custom made to welcome you in your sleep or whenever silence struck you, your mind slipping down the slippery slope. It was always an experience, falling asleep. Your apprehension kept you from sleeping, nerves thrumming with stress and fear yet your body sinking into whatever it was you were sleeping on because of exhaustion. Yet you needed to sleep, and you did, only a handful of hours, no more than five each night since as long as you could remember. You take a deep breath, sending the thoughts away, eyes now screwed shut to try to fall asleep as soon as you can.

Faces flashing with cockiness, then fear, then horror, then nothing if a face was left at all, hands raw and stained with blood, your own or theirs you didn't know anymore, everybody looked the same on the inside after all. But sometimes you wondered if you did, or if a void was left behind, maybe everything was rotten? It would explain why you were such a mess inside. A sigh racks through you as you try to empty your mind again. Tomorrow you would bring Silco to the shop and he would help, that was something to look forward to. It meant there would be less silence, and more clients if you two worked well enough. It also meant Silco would be back out in the world, and maybe in danger, although you want to hope it wouldn't happen but you never know in Zaun. Would he like the people there? Would the people like him, forgive him for his past actions? They had taken you in, bloodied and frenzied, and gave you a home, but would they extend the same kindness to someone as infamous as him? Would they see he's trying?

As your thoughts spiral once again, you don't hear deliberate footsteps walking towards you, then there was a small sigh and warmth that ripped apart every thought swarming your head. And as silly as it was, that simple feeling, no matter what it was, brought enough calm to your mind for you to fall asleep. Later waking up with a startle, a gasp slicing through the silence like a cleaver through meat, you realize a blanket is layered on top of you, the neon lights of Zaun illuminating your living room slightly through the window alcove showing how neatly you were tucked in. You wrap the blanket around you and waddle to the kitchen, preparing coffee and taking the full pot with you to the pillowy seat nestled in the window's arch, a sort of couch that you used every morning when nightmares shook you awake. That's all you do each morning before Silco wakes up, it's all you've always done since you escaped really, forced to bear the heavy silence spurring on your thoughts, jumpstarting your spiralling as you tried and failed to keep yourself from disassociating.

"You're up early." You startle and almost punch Silco

"I always am." You sigh, looking one last time to the neon lit city and its claustrophobic rocky walls and ceiling before staring at the man behind you, turning as you do. "Coffee?" You point to the pot sitting with you in the alcove and he nods, leaving for the kitchen and coming back with a mug in hand. The same one he's been using since you two got into your new rhythm of life, which was about to change again today.

"Do you get any sleep at all?" He asks, nodding in thanks at his now full cup, your legs curling under me so he can sit down, you shrug, your heavy eyes finding his teal one, still covered in the eyepatch.

"Slept with it?"

"Yes, it's quite comfortable and it gives me more peace of mind knowing I won't scratch my eye with the pillow or sheets in my sleep."

You sigh in understanding. "I should've made it a long time ago then. Sorry Silco."

He hums, hand softly flicking the air in a lazy "don't worry" wave. He looks outside, his eye softening just a moment before he takes a sip of lukewarm coffee, sitting up and walking to the kitchen to get started on breakfast. You look at him confused, breakfast was usually the meal you prepared but he seemed almost adamant to make it as you shuffle to the kitchen.

"Silco, just go sit, breakfast's my turn."

"Not anymore. Go get ready, you look nothing short of dreary."

"Ouch." You mumble, bringing the blanket closer you you and narrowing your eyes at him before shuffling upstairs, changing into your clothes for the day, discarding your pyjamas in the bathroom as you brush your hair and splash some cold water on your face. Breakfast was ready by the time you came back to the living room, folding the blanket to put it over one of your armchairs before walking to the kitchen. Breakfast went by quickly and soon you were walking to the shop with Silco in tow, the man observing the houses, shops and alleys you passed, the few rare people out at that time nodding their greetings at you two, eyes narrowing inquisitively at Silco. You explain that you waking up this early was almost a blessing in your job, it left you time to get the hearth to the right temperature and check your tools and material in peace before the clients arrived. He quickly followed your orders, making lists of everything you pointed towards, carrying boxes back and forth in the shop, forge and in the back.

When the clock struck 8 a.m you opened the metallic blinds outside and flipped the little "open" sign, getting immediately back to work and working with metal and flames to create strong tools and appliances, fixing broken parts and objects. With Silco at the front you had to yell over the top of your incessant tinkering to explain that he was your new assistant, the man introducing himself politely to everyone in flurries of progressively more annoyed words.

"Good day sir/ma'am, I'm Silco. It's a pleasure to meet you."

Everytime the question of who he was resounded again you couldn't help but giggle at the tensing of his body before he took a deep breath and introduced himself yet again, the man glaring at you before going back to taking orders. You left him in the shop to buy your lunch, letting him get some alone time after a busy morning.

"You're a madwoman. Genuinely. Silco? I thought you were more clever than that." These words were repeated to you in every way, shape and form as you walked to your favourite stall while surrounded by a group of people, and sighing you turn to Oleg, a miner working in the deepest recesses of the fissures.

"Listen, I know it seems like a bad idea but he was a dying man, I saved him and told him that since he lost everything he might as well do something better of his life. And he is doing just that, so I don't get why you're getting on my case when all of you have done the same to me." The little crowd of clients following you stopped as you glare in their direction. You know it was somewhat different for Silco, yet it was the same. The only thing separating you was the fame you harbored when you started your new life. "You saw a girl with blood and flesh clinging to her hands like seafoam to the shore and you took her in with open arms. I'm not asking you to trust him immediately, it would be hypocritical knowing how infamous he was, but by Janna give him a chance like you did for me! He was who he was but he lost it all, he is the Eye of Zaun no more, he's just Silco and he's a Zaunite like all of us."

Your hand rakes through your hair as you expell out a sigh, your words ringing through the now silent street. Your steps taking you away from the group as sound found its way back little by little, people nodding at you but what you saw wasn't a greeting, it was the subtle sign of respect accorded from one trencher to another when they did something right by the book. It was a symbol that had you preening as you went back to the shop with a warm bag in hand hanging from the crook of your elbow.

The bell rang as you entered, walking towards the back where Silco was, leaning his elbows on the table as he sat on a chair, one hand holding his hand up as his eyes looked over your ledger, his eyepatch discarded on the side.

"Food's here." His eyes drag lazily to you before closing the book, straightening up on his seat while you get to your own, placing the hot meal on the table. "How did the morning go, are you holding up alright?"

"It's more...social, than I'm used to." He sighs and thanks you for the meal, taking a couple of bites before his eyes drag back to you and his good eyebrow raises.

"Are you?" He must be referring to your thrumming body, shaken by your swiftly bouncing leg. "Sorry" is uttered softly and he shakes his head in dismissal.

"I'm f-" His eyes narrow and you huff, shovelling some food in your mouth to calm down, taking your time to chew. "Alright, alright don't get on my ass. Janna. Just a few people buzzing around me uncomfortably as I went to the market."

"It was about me wasn't it." His voice was softer, his eyes looking at you invitingly, coaxing an answer out of you as you nod. He looks to the side, his bites getting slower as he thinks. "If it's too much of a hass-"

"Shut it." His face snaps to you as if you'd slap him, face confused and nearly offended. "You're not a hassle Silco, I've made that clear. They've taken me in, of all people, so you shouldn't be that big of a deal either, infamous or not." Is mumbled before you knock back your drink, finishing the rest of your meal. "You're doing your best, that's all I'm asking. And if it ain't enough for them, then they'll have to wait. End of story."

He huffs, the closest thing you could get to a laugh from him as his eyes glimmer in the neon light, the teal ice melting and the orange flames flickering when he looked at you. A small smile grew on your face and your shoulders slumped after a deep breath, your eyes enough to tell Silco that it'd all be alright.

"We both knew people wouldn't necessarily accept you, I gave them a push towards the right way and now they're gonna have to see the truth for what it is. What use is there to dig a deeper grave for a dead man?" You add as you retrieve the containers, throwing them in the trash before washing your hands.

"And you'd let them think you a bad person just because you've taken me in? For as long as it takes for them to accept me if they even do?" His voice calls out from behind, getting closer as he leans on the small counter next to the sink, next to you.

You hum, nodding softly while you wipe your hands. "Who says I'm a good person Silco?" You pat him on the shoulder, the contact making his body stiff from tension as you walk back to the door, flipping the sign yet again to open for the afternoon.

The rest of the afternoon was spent similarly with Silco working up front with the customers and you slaving away in the forge, quipping in whenever you could. Silco didn't look quite as bothered to introduce himself as he was this morning, and although he was tense you could only guess it was from the amount of people he talked to. Your shop provided for anyone that needed it from miners to contractors, doctors, and even children and parents. Not only from your hole in the wall but from the surrounding neighborhoods aswell, people coming from near and afar for a good service at a reasonable price, your honesty and hard work earning you a loyal clientelle. And as days passed the tense looks and whispers exchanged at Silco's presence at the register, sat down pouring over orders and ledgers, finally starting to make space for longer greetings, a few "how are you"s and weather talks before getting to business. Your week being based off of the workers' schedules Sundays and Mondays were your days off, Tuesdays to Fridays were in the shop and Saturdays were delivery days. The first one Silco was a part of was barely spent explaining at all, the man knowing the Undercity's Entresol, Fringes and Sump levels quite well from his youth, albeit you did show him a few safe enough alleyways to cut through. When you had to deliver a couple of steel toe guards to the mines he did ask to be left out, and you complied, knowing better than to shove someone back in a place with so much meaning so early on in their healing process.

Silco's help in the shop reflected in the work you did, you could focus more on your craft and thus make and fix pieces faster and better than before, the man dealing with numbers and orders quite masterfully. Saturdays were spent split apart after the second week, delivering quicker and more efficiently so you could bow out earlier. The clients whether at the shop or in their own homes began warming up to him, striking up amicable conversations in the streets and at the shop; and he warmed up to them too his voice lacking the bite it had at first, the social situations no longer bothering him and even being welcomed by him. At home the rhythm was pretty much the same, you cooked in the mornings, he did at night, you'd share a smoke and a drink and then head to sleep after a shower. But it was comfortable, almost homely, and your talks now were more than a couple of exchanged sentences like they used to be but more like full fledged, hours long conversations. And so with the responsibilities shared between the both of you, you could finally plan your little sabotages again, taking infos as you passed in the streets with your ears focused on as many conversations as you could, same in the shop although the noise you made in the forge made it harder for you to listen in.

Shimmer production had been stopped, that much you knew, yet you heard Margot stormed the warehouses and started redistributing the liquid at the highest price, capitalizing on Silco's death. You would have bet on Smeegle doing that sort of thing, but he died. After the whole fiasco, the remaining four barons had fought over who would get which share of the pie; but Renni had die on a terrorist attempt at the newly made Councilor Memorial in Piltover and Smeech was apparently killed by Jinx, if what the rumors said was true. Which left only Margot and Chross from the old regime.

Margot had apparently suffered great losses due to the grey appearing back in her HQ, but dealt with those losses quite well by balancing them with heavy profits at her brothels. Chross himself had been rather silent, you saw his men sometimes during deliveries, listening as you passed by. The man was rounding up troops to take as much of Zaun as he could before new Chem Barons could rise to the top, although it seems like a few already were making their way there.

One in particular named Renata Glasc, one of the rare Zaunites to harbor a last name. While you couldn't do much to thwart Chross, especially since his men were one of your best sources of information, you definitely could for Margot and it would definitely help you for Silco's treatment.

An injection could only dampen the pain and stop the rotting for so long before the metabolism flushed it out, a day to be exact. So you would have to look into that, while you weren't a scientist, Samira could help and in exchange for new material and tools that you could provide. The shimmer shipments would come in the last part of your plan though, as you needed to set a few things up beforehand. Margot's manpower had been divided between the losses in the gang wars, the losses due to the grey, and the remainder of her people either working or moving said shipments.

But you were only one woman, so everyday after Silco turned in for the night, you'd nurse another drink, smoke escaping your lips as you took a drag from yet another cigarette as you mulled over plans, the map of Zaun stretched before you and your unoccupied hand scribbling on a notebook. And every night you'd get little sleep, as much as when Silco was not present in your life, but you still woke up with a blanket laid on top of you while wondering how the man even did it everytime like clockwork.

You disliked having to hide it from him, priding yourself in honesty will do that to you, but you decided to keep up the lie just a bit longer as he got used to living here as his new self, refusing to burden him with your own fights. The first night you left, you had rushed through the sewer systems to listen in to a meeting, a smoke bomb covering sights as you took out each member present, taking the plans that were laid on the table.

The second night was soon after, hurrying on the roofs to interrogate a handful of women that had been very cooperative once you had mentioned ruining their faces, the bread winner in women working in the environment they did. And slowly you made Margot panic, more members placed at what she thought were important outposts, until the shimmer warehouses were a reachable goal for a "one woman army" such as yourself, leading your revolution silently against those who didn't give a care about their fellow Zaunites.

"Where are you always going so late?" Makes you tense slightly, and as you turn towards Silco's voice you see him leaning against the table and you sigh.

"Don't sneak up on me, please." A hand is ran over your face tiredly.

"I wouldn't have to if you didn't keep things from me."

He almost growls, his voice dark and so were his eyes. You knew it was because he felt betrayed, and you felt bad for lying to him, you really did. But he was a man who worked towards a revolution in his life only to have it be taken from his hands violently each time, you didn't want to worry him or bring back memories he's rather forget. It felt silly, protecting this battle hardened, intelligent veteran of a man from things that could hurt him in any way, but you couldn't help it. Just like you couldn't help yourself in trying to help Zaun in every small way you can, or even Silco by getting enough shimmer to last him longer and maybe even begin to try and find him an antidote. It was just hard to hide or to reveal because you both prized loyalty and honesty, but you also knew he would feel like you're taking pity on him and get angry whether at you or himself.

"I don't have much time for myself anymore, so I just take a walk. I can't sleep usually, so I thought that instead of being restless at home I could just tire myself out." You sit next to him. "I'm as used to this as you are Silco, but I wasn't given the time to breathe until now. Which is partly thanks to you and your hard work, thank you for that."

He tilts his head to look at you and nods, seemingly letting go of the subject. "Do you have a dagger?"

Your head turns, gaze catching his and a small smile softens your face as you shake your head and he sighs, reaching to the band on his thigh and retrieving his own.

"If you're going out, at least don't be stupid." That would be the closest to "stay safe" but you'd take it, the words dripping with much more care than you'd expect from him. But then again, in this new life of his that he is building up from ruins of his past, you were his only constant aswell as the one who saved him. Now whether he acted like this simply out of gratefulness or out of a true need to connect, you didn't know, and it was more than okay.

Weighing the dagger in your hand for a moment you pocket it with a small "thanks" and nudge Silco with your shoulder teasingly.

"I'll stay safe and sound, don't you worry. Don't sleep too late, okay?" You utter softly, beginning to walk towards the door.

"Hypocrite." He scoffs.

"Fossil." You throw back, looking over your shoulder as he scoffs, walking away from the table with a nonchalant wave as his goodnight.

And with that you were out, heading towards the warehouse where all the shimmer had been transferred, your little stunt making sure that they put all the stock in one place, the cold air of Zaun nipping at your skin as the neon lights provided ample lighting and enough shadows to hide. As you arrive you know that your preparation hasn't been in vain, there are much less goons than there should be in such an important spot. So silently you make your way around, analyzing the rounds they made, the unsuspecting women going down one by one, quickly and silently with each of your punches. Once the outside was cleared you dragged the bodies out of sight and slipped in, the inside was much more protected and it could be a problem. So you retrieve a bolt from your pocket, throwing it away from you in a blind spot that would allow you to take out some of the lackeys. Once they bite at the bait you slip between cases filled with shimmer containers and rid yourself of the handful of them.

This warehouse was not a big one, enough to accomodate what was left of Silco's shimmer stocks after stopping production and destroying part of his supply, some of the rest having been pillaged in his absence. That meant that it was easier to take the goons down but also that there weren't many hiding spots or enough space to keep yourself safe in case you got ambushed or found out. You hide between cases as another group comes in to check on their comrades and make quick work of them too. Sliding behind a handful that was posted around an exit you catch one, dragging her back in the shadows as you constrict her throat, using the alert when her collegues couldn't find her to slip behind each of them and continue your silent takeover.

No more groups were left, all the bodies now piled and hidden away in the shadows as you place small handmade bombs made of old metal sheets, nuts and bolts, and some explosives given to you by miners, around each corner. Around nine of them were now placed, the radius of one explosion being enough to detonate the ones next to it who would detonate the rest.

But as you opened a crate, ready to pocket as much shimmer as you could before you ran you heard noises. Four last group of lackeys had remained, switching after a certain amount of time with one of those which you had beaten so they could rest. The calm contentment of a job well done replaced by panicked annoyance.

The one thing you wished would not happen, happened.

The ambushers were quick to recover from the shock of seeing you and rushed to you, possibilities of escape gone as you fight your way through a horde of very angry, leather clad women. Whips were flailing you, clawed fingers dug in your skin, but you fought back with punches and kicks strong enough to break bone and bites that had your jaw aching and their blood spilling.

Your brutality was more than they could handle, using their whips to drag them to you, their sharp nails digging into their own flesh after a well place attack. But no matter how strong you were, it was one woman against two dozen and the sheer number made up for their lack of battle intelligence. The last three pinning you to the ground by the legs and shoulders as one was straddling you, beating your face black and blue, letting the torture continue.

As your vision darkens, blood filling your mouth and nose at the relentless assault, you remember the metal object in your pocket. So you act as if you were putting up a fight, fidgetting as your hand inched closer to your pocket, spotty vision getting spottier, breathing getting harder. But then your hand grazes the dagger and with a flick all was over. The woman above you choking on her blood as she held her neck, the one at your legs kicked after she releases her hold a bit out of surprise, and the one holding your shoulders stabbed in the head.

Getting up you inch closer and drop to your knees, straddling the lackey left stunned, and run the dagger in the middle of her forehead, the poor girl twitching before everything goes silent. Ripping the weapon away from were the blade was currently stuck you fell backwards, wiping it on your jacket from all the blood before shoving it back in your pocket as you took deep gulps of air.

Your vision was coming back but you knew that you looked like a mess without even seeing it, expecting bruises, hand shaped marks, claw marks and whip burns aswell as a black eye. Your nose was definitely broken, but all your teeth seemed to be intact, even through your bloodied mouth, your tongue and cheeks were chewed and needed care though, just as the rest of your body did.

So with a groan you slowly got up, deciding not to overstay in case a new group of lackeys appeared out of nowhere. Pocketing as much shimmer as possible you shove some in your coat, in your pants, even in your shoes and shirt, before pulling the pin on the center bomb. After a good twenty seconds, you are close enough to hear the first explosion and all of those that followed but far enough to not get hit, the bright burning orange turning purple from the shimmer, ground rattling at the force. Your form retreating in the shadows of alleyways as voices shouted at the noise and burst of bright light, limping out of the area as fast as you can without hurting yourself more than necessary. Although it was hard when your whole body felt like it was drowning in a vat of acid and your spine was turned into powder, you still dragged yourself home, silently yet heavily climping up the stairs, walking drunk on pain as you fumble with your keys.

You close and lock the door as softly as possible and move to the table, taking out all the shimmer vials within your clothes, dropping your coat on the chair before you drag yourself to the bathroom for a very painful yet deserved shower. Barely standing up you look at your reflection on the condensation covered mirror. "I look like death" you think scoffing before putting on your underwear you reach for your kit, the same one that had helped you keep Silco alive four months ago. And coming out of the warm bathroom you begin to drag yourself to the alcove.

"I see your walk has gone well."

"Shit."

There he was on the couch to your left, arms draped over the back of the seat, his legs crossed, the orange eye glowing angrily in the dark just like the tip of the cigarette he took drags off ever so often. You sigh, continuing your walk there, tensing in pain at each step, each breath, a wheeze escaping you as you sit in the pillowy alcove, refusing to look at or talk to Silco out of shame. And just as you opened the heavy chest to begin treating your wounds, two frigid, porcelain like hands catch your wrists. Silco sat down next to you, back to the window and began perusing through your medical material, pulling out bandages, ointment, hydrogen peroxyde and a cloth.

"Don't move." He commands, calm yet louder than thunder, dark and gravelly. He moves to the kitchen where you see him prepare a basin, and boiling water, cutting it with cold water in the basin before taking it aswell as another cloth and walking back. The cloth was wrung and as you looked at him, tilting your head in confusion, he moved it to your face. You took the hint and closed your eyes, appreciating the very hot towel's feeling on your bloated and bruised face.

"It helps with bruising, stimulates blood flow." You nod, too ashamed to voice anything. Rustling is heard and your left forearm burns, he was caring for your wounds. "You lied."

"I did." You say finally, unable to appologize as you knew you probably broke what little trust he had towards you.

"Explain everything. Do not gloss over any detail." His voice is low, grip strong against your hurt body, but you nod. Explaining everything in great detail, from how you've started your acts of rebellion up until tonight. You wanted the old Silco dead, wanted the last of his empire to crumble so he could be free. You needed the shimmer to help soothe his pain, needed to thwart any Chem baron's plan to take over Zaun after his death. Your voice growing angry and frustrated as you get into a rant.

"They're self-righteous, narcissistic, power hungry freaks that just prove to the Pilties we are what they see us as. They steal from the mouths, hands and soils of their own people for Janna's sake! It's disgusting, and it is even more so because of how profitable it is to them. They do just like Piltovan nobles, councilors and scientists do to us, and because of them we're reduced to even less than we were before. So I fight, I fight against those who betrayed us, whether it is the city of progress or our own flesh and blood."

His grip got softer as you talked, the stinging of the hydrogen peroxide soothed by the slow gentleness of his touch.

"I want Zaun to belong to the Zaunites. The ones that die for simply existing here, the ones that work their ass off to provide for their families and themselves while the sycophantic, self-absorbed, self-important monstrous Barons and Piltovans profit off of their suffering. But I'm only one woman, so I plan and I plan to create small annoyances that could or could not be great setbacks in their plans. I do that because I believe in the dream you once had, but I don't believe in the violence and manipulation you used to get to the point you were at before. So I fight like a Zaunite, I think like a Zaunite, I follow the Zaunite code and I help my people day in and day out no matter in how, no matter what. And their gratefulness is why I still fight even if things seem impossible."

You take a deep breath, shaking as tears escape your eyes from beneath the hot towel.

"Janna, I just want to be free! You leave a prison to get in a bigger and crueller one, it's not fair! And no matter how much you crawl and grovel, no matter how much you climb and fight, you always end up at the same spot because of those disgusting...fucking monsters! And it's all a goddamn game of monopoly to them as if we weren't the ones paying the price of their foolishness." Your breath is heavy, chest moving up and down in anger before the cloth is ripped from your eyes, face held between long fingers by the chin.

"And yet you still fight?" You nod, your eyes finding his and not finding them angry, it was something deeper, sadder. He was looking both at you and through you, like a ghost of the past was breathing down your neck. "And do you think what you're doing is good?"

"I told you, I'm not a good person."

"That wasn't what I asked." His grip on your chin tightens momentarily to bring you out of your spiral.

"I do what I believe is good." You sigh deeply, back relaxing against the alcove. "I know the lackeys are most likely people doing this to save themselves or their families. It doesn't feel any better to kill them, even if it gets easier. But they work for someone evil, and by proxy they do evil things, so I get rid of them. I do the same with enforcers. I know I can't save Zaun, even if I desperately wish I could. I just help provide our people respite, and that's all that matters to me."

He nods pensively, hand leaving your chin to continue wrapping you up. Dipping the towel in the hot water again before placing it on your face.

"You say you aren't a good person, but your morals are more sound than mine have been in over a decade. There is no pure good in this world, and although there is some evil most of what exists is colored in shades of grey."

His hands brush against your clavicle, a silent question. You nod and stinging begins from your chest at is ministrations.

"I had forgotten that the normalcy of these shades of grey didn't make you any more righteous. And from someone like you, I became who I am...who I was. Blinded by rage at the world against what they did to our people, and to me. Your kindness is a form of rebellion in itself in a world where many end up like me." His voice is soft, almost barely a whisper as pain surges from your stomach area, the stinging from hydrogen peroxide burning your flesh. "The people here like you, you're honest, you work hard, you're gentle. That's more than what any of us are usually given. Revolution is never done without blood, even if you feel guilty remember that, at the very least, you care for the other trenchers unless proven unworthy and never hurt an innocent."

Your fists clench and so does your jaw, lips pulled downward in a weak snear.

"You don't know that."

"Did you want to?" You shake your head, leaning backwards after because of the searing migraine crushing your head. "Were you forced to?" You hesitate, yet nod slowly, the hands wrapping up your middle tucking the bandage neatly. "Many of us end up killing at least once out of necessity. If you were forced into a cycle of violence where that necessity became a daily occurence, who can fault you for fighting for your life? You did not chose to be there, your opponents most likely did. They lost, you lived. That's all there is to it."

His hands touch your waist and twist softly, you obey his silent demand, your back now facing him.

"Where are you from?"

"The Sump." What the rough mumble you managed to let out.

"Keradon?" The name of your old handler had you grabbing your crossed legs, nodding grimly. "Were you the one who killed the poor bastard?" Another nod, one of your hand picking the towel on your face and throwing it in the basin, rubbing your face afterwards. "He organized fights to the deaths, and you were just a kid, you had no say in this. You're no monster, look behind you and you'll see what a true monster is."

You shiver, exhaustion and anguish eating away at the last of your energy as pain rattled your body, delicately manipulated in Silco's hands.

"You did good tonight. Just like it seems you've done good in the past decade. You're strong, and what you do is good, but do not play the hero."

"You were one, once."

"We both know that time has passed long ago." The last of your wounds are covered and cared for and after feeling a shift behind you, you're suddenly lifted, the blanket from your armchair wrapped around you as Silco carries you up the stairs. Careful as he places you on the bed, he goes to leave afterwards before your hands grab at his, his teal eye widening in confusion as his eyebrow furrows.

"Not to me."

His head tilts in question, his body coming to sit next to your laying form.

"I think you're still a hero." Your eyes find his, blurry gaze drowned in teal currents before being consumed by orange flames as you smile as much as your bruised cheeks allowed you to.

"Everyone gets lost at some point, the most important is that you come back home."

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[paintingwhiteceilings]

❃First Dates with Seventeen❃

I am back from the grave and come bearing delulu gifts. I should have been working on my thesis, but today was rough, so I decided to fantasise about romance instead. It is to make up for my non-existent love life; here is to being perpetually single!

Scoups/Seungcheol

❀ This man goes all out for the first date; nothing is too expensive for him as he wants you to feel like a queen at the end. Coups will rent out a theme park for the two of you within a heartbeat the moment you mention that you love roller coasters.

❀ That being said, he strikes me as someone who loves to combine luxury with pampering, doing something that is very relaxing and allows you two to focus on getting to know each other through deep conversations. Coups will probably take you to an expensive and exclusive restaurant, paying a little extra to sit in a more excluded area where no one can interrupt or overhear you.

❀ You two end up talking until the restaurant closes, barely paying attention to the Michelin-star meal that gets served. After you get kicked out, he will not want to let you go just yet, asking you to go on a walk to "digest the food."

❀ He definitely would be the type of member to invite you over to spend the night together, either to continue the conversation or to explore the relationship more physically. However, he would only take the next step if you make the first move or clearly verbalize to him that you want to. Of course, it is because Coups is respectful of your boundaries and it is absolutely not due to him being way too nervous to initiate anything himself.

Jeonghan

❀ Jeonghan strikes me as someone who would take you on a cosy date. Similarly to Coups, he would focus more so on conversation, preferring it over getting to know each other by doing an activity together. Still, as he doesn't want to come over as someone who only invites you over to his place to Netflix and Chill, he does put a lot of effort into the date. 

❀ Jeonghan would probably create an indoor picnic, setting up a bunch of pillows and blankets for you two to comfortably lay on. The dress code: pyjamas; it is all about being super comfortable. It would remind you of the many sleepovers you used to have as a child, but more romantic. You two would play silly games, talk about everything and nothing, do some facemasks together and eat so much good food. It would be such a blast. 

❀ He would not make a move on the first date; he already was quite bold by inviting you over to his place for the first date, and he doesn't want to make you uncomfortable. Unless you decide to kiss him, he will keep a respectful distance from you the entire time. The most he would do is hold your hand to do some pseudo-palm reading he found online. 

Joshua

❀Welcome to the best date of your life. Joshua is the best dater in the world, and nobody can convince me otherwise. This man would walk straight out of a fairy tale book with him in the starring role of Prince Charming. It would not be above him to hire a horse and carriage, snuggling up together as you ride through some magical fairy tale forest, with both of you dressed to the nines. 

❀ Still, Joshua strikes me as someone who would plan a crafting date; he would either take you to a pottery class or take you to make some bracelets. Joshua would suggest that you both make something for the other. It is quite a smart move on his part; you would have to continuously ask the other questions to figure out their design preferences. Plus, at the end of the date, you both will have a keepsake to commemorate the time you spent together.

❀The only thing this gentleman is kissing is your hand as a greeting. There will be no handholding either; he will only accidentally touch your hand when he hands something over to you. You would have to go on at least five dates before he even considers kissing you. He is a good Christian boy (who fears the wrath of God).

Jun

❀ Jun is too socially awkward to have a date that is conversation focussed. He needs something to distract you from his rambling and the painful silences. Instead, to avoid running out of conversation topics, he decides to do something fun together, where he can be in his element. He is taking you to a petting zoo.

❀ Although things are painfully awkward at the beginning of the date, his shyness immediately vanishes when he spots all the rabbits and goats running around the petting zoo. He might (accidentally) forget you are there for a moment as he pets a sheep that keeps sniffing at his shoes. However, he will enthusiastically start introducing you to all his favourite animals upon remembering you are there, too. Turns out, this particular petting zoo is his regular spot. 

❀ He would 1000% compare you to his favourite chicken.

❀ Will this man touch you during or at the end of the date? Absolutely not. He will ramble on and on about all the cute animals once he is comfortable, but if you do as much as graze his arm with yours, he will go back to painfully shy Jun, and you would have to place a guinea pig in his arms to get him talking again.

Hoshi/Soonyoung

❀ Although Hoshi becomes the most chaotic person alive once he is comfortable around someone, he would be painfully shy during a first date. He has to do something with you because he can't stand the awkward silences that he will inevitably let fall. Thus, to no one's surprise, he will take you to do something incredibly active. Hoshi spent so much time trying to come up with something unique, but in the end, he settled for something that made him feel comfortable, namely a one-on-one dancing lesson. 

❀ It genuinely would be so much fun. At first, Hoshi is incredibly shy, barely touching you to correct your posture, blushing whenever meets your eyes. As time goes on, he slowly becomes more comfortable and daring, interacting with you and touching you more boldly. The dancing grounds him, reminding him that he's got this and that he is in his element.

❀ Still, Hoshi reverts to being shy when the music ends, now panicking over every single time he has had to put his hand on your waist to steady you. He wouldn't be able to make it through a single sentence without tripping over his words as he gets haunted by flashbacks of the times his bold, performing self touched you. So yeah, he is mortified by his actions. 

❀ Needless to say, he wouldn't be kissing you goodnight.

Wonwoo:

❀ He would be another member mortified at the thought of having to keep a conversation going during a date. Wonwoo took his sweet time with an actual plan for a date; he didn't actually expect to get this far. Thus, he has been bothering Mingyu to help him out with date ideas that would not highlight his introversion. On Mingyu's advice, he decides to do something that he is good at and would enjoy. He takes you to a gaming cafe. 

❀ Whether you are good at gaming or not, he makes sure that he has a list of fun multiplayer games for you two to play that aren’t too complicated. You have fun running a restaurant together in 'PlateUp!' before he convinces you to play 'It Takes Two' together, using the story to create a wholesome and romantic atmosphere. The best part is that the game is too long to finish in one playthrough, making it easier for him to ask you out on a second and third date. It gives you plenty to talk about, too; how can you not discuss the Cutie the Elephant scene? 

❀ It would all go so well, all until he has walked you to your door. He gets so nervous about potentially kissing you goodnight that, instead, he shakes your hand, all businesslike, telling you it was a good one. It takes him a solid five seconds to realize what he is doing and for him to turn bright red. Luckily, you find it funny, agreeing it was a good one. He was ready to drop all contact with you and change his entire identity if you hadn't laughed. 

Woozi

❀ It isn't that Woozi is incredibly nervous about your date; he is actually very much looking forward to it. However, he genuinely does not know what you two can do together, as he literally never leaves his house. The members aren't much help either; they either make fun of him for finally deciding to go outside or tell him to do some wild activity that he really can't imagine doing. They keep reminding him that he can't bring you to the gym or bring you along to the studio as he works. Apparently, that isn't romantic. 

❀ It is Jeonghan who surprisingly helps him out by recommending doing a movie marathon or binge-watching a series together. Jeonghan even helps him decorate the living room with candles, making it all nice and romantic. Not that the atmosphere would be very romantic, though; you decided to put on a Marvel show, and now you are having a lore-heavy discussion trying to connect all the stories. You two even brought out a notebook so you could draw a mind map of the different plot points and storylines. 

❀ Despite all the romantic lyrics that he writes, Woozi wouldn't know what to do when you tell him you have to go. He is overthinking everything as you get up to grab your coat and get ready to leave. Should he walk you home? Should he kiss you? As you are about to close the door behind you, he would muster up the courage to ask you what he should do. Woozi is very embarrassed about it, but he would rather risk looking stupid as he asks you how a date is supposed to end than end up doing the wrong thing. 

❀ Well, answer wisely. 

DK/Seokmin

❀ DK is way too excited to be going on a date with you. In fact, he has so many date ideas that he decided to do all of them at once, in one go. It might not be the best idea, but DK is not thinking clearly. He is too distracted by his enthusiasm, only thinking about how he gets to go on a date with you. You should be concerned when he asks you to bring multiple outfits; each outfit fits a different date activity. 

❀ The date starts out fun as he brings you to the zoo. You spent some time laughing at the monkeys and taking pictures together at the animal cut-outs. However, after not even an hour has passed, DK is already dragging you to the next activity he has planned. In one date, you guys visit a waterpark, do a scavenger hunt, go bowling and go ice skating. It is honestly not surprising that when DK leans over to talk to you, he discovers that you have fallen asleep during the movie. He realises that maybe he asked a bit too much of you and guiltily lets you catch up on some sleep. 

❀ DK is genuinely convinced that you never want to see him again, being incredibly quiet as he walks you home. When he voices as much, you surprise him by kissing his cheek and telling him you had fun, though you would prefer maybe not to do five activities during one date. He will not shut up about it during dance practice for weeks. 

Mingyu

❀ A date with Mingyu really depends on who he is taking on a date and what he thinks would fit that person best. He is such a people person that he will come up with a date idea that is fun for the both of you. If he gets to decide, though, I can see him choosing between two widely different date ideas, depending on his mood.

❀ On the one hand, I can see Mingyu opting for something romantic. For instance, I can see him inviting someone over so that he can cook for them. He would have you seated across from where he is cooking, trying his hardest to impress you with his cooking skills. It would be such an intimate setting: just you two, sitting in the quiet kitchen as the evening grows darker, chatting as you sip your glass of wine. The food would be delicious, and the flirting unrivalled. 

❀ On the other hand, Mingyu strikes me as someone who would also love to go on a lighthearted and fun date, focusing on having a good time together. There wouldn't be anything sensual about it; you two would be cracking up the entire time. For some reason, I can see him taking his date to play mini-golf. Not only would it be hilarious every time one of you launches the ball in the wrong direction, but it would also give him an excuse to touch you as he tries to 'help.' 

❀ Mingyu would definitely end the date not so innocently if you give him the okay sign. And, let's be fair, chances are that you would; he is too fine not to and after all that flirting...

The8/Minghao

❀ Minghao would put a lot of thought into the date, even going as far as planning it before he asked you out. Minghao is painfully aware that you make him nervous and that he can't afford to slack on the date activity; at least when there is an awkward silence because he doesn't know what to say, you would have something pretty to look at. Thus, he makes sure to go over his plan at least five times, asking the other members for second opinions that he will ultimately disregard when he goes with his original idea. 

❀ All in all, his first date ideas all have something creative and peaceful. He wants to create an atmosphere that is relaxing and fosters deep conversations. He, for instance, would opt to organize a painting date where he will show off his painting skills, taking you to a scenic nature look-out where you can spend your afternoon eating the food he prepared in a picnic basket, chatting as you try to capture the beautiful forest scene in front of you. 

❀ Another first date that I can see him taking you on is stargazing. Minghao would prepare a ton of cosy blankets and pillows that soften the hard ground you otherwise would have had to lay on. Instead of pointing out existing constellations, you would try to come up with your own. It would be so serene with the silence only broken by your conversation, held in soft, quiet whispers. If the moment is right, he would lean in for a kiss, hiding the redness of his face in the dark of the night. 

Seungkwan

❀ Seungkwan initially felt so much pressure to organize the best date ever. He has his reputation as 'one of the funniest members of Seventeen' to uphold and wants you to have an amazing time. Similarly to some of the other members, Seungkwan has several different first date ideas that he would choose from depending on his date and mood. Mostly, I can see him doing something very active as it would help him focus less on his nerves and more on being in the moment.

❀ Seungkwan would, for instance, take you on a hike, using it as an excuse to have deep conversations as you enjoy the beautiful, warm summer day. He loves to walk and talk, using the hike to grow closer. You two would bring along some food, stopping at picturesque scenes to enjoy lunch as you share your life stories. 

❀ I can also imagine Seungkwan taking you to see a volleyball match or to play volleyball. He adores the sport and would probably want to share his love for the game with you. Despite being incredible at ball games, he would be incredibly gentle with you, making sure that you don't accidentally injure yourself. Plus, he gets to show off his incredible skills. 

❀ He would be another member who is too shy to initiate anything physical. It would be on his mind constantly, but he wouldn't get past his overthinking thoughts. He will keep a healthy, respectful distance unless you decide to initiate skinship.

Vernon

❀ I can't, for the love of me, imagine Vernon on a serious date. This man's entire vocabulary consists of memes, and I am sure he will get inspired by some wacky internet post to do something weird. Instead of doing something romantic or typical date-like, he would go for something outside the box. Sure, he loves movies and could do a cliche movie date, but where is the fun in that? 

❀ After watching a popular ghost-hunting video, he decides it would be a good idea to go on a ghost-hunting date together. He even bought specialized ghost-hunting tools so that you could communicate with the spirits. It is a bit of a waste of money; he probably will never use them again (unless you are not utterly horrified by the end of it and would want to go on another ghost-hunting date). Most people wouldn't consider an abandoned prison romantic (and neither did you), but at least it is a fun, never-been-done-before first date. 

❀ You now made a new friend, a ghost called Dave, who apparently likes pizza, that the spirit box picked up on the second floor's hallway. Another ghost, who kept repeating the words 'toilet' and 'cereal', decided to briefly join your date when you walked into one of the cellblocks. Overall, you don't have conclusive proof that ghosts exist by the end of it, but the date went well. 

❀ This man is oblivious to date etiquette; when you ask whether he wants to spend the night, he thinks you are asking him whether he wants to spend the night at the abandoned prison. You might be regretting that you asked as you now are terrified, trying to sleep in a sleeping bag next to a knocked-out Vernon on the cold prison floor.

Dino/Chan

❀ Poor Dino does not know what to do with your first date, paralysed from fear at the thought that he will do something stupid. He has been staring at a wall these past few days, racking his brain as he tries to come up with something to impress you. Part of him wants to ask his members for help, but Dino knows that if he did, they would never let him live it down. 

❀ Inspiration, however, strikes him over dinner the day before you are supposed to be going on a date. Dino is running around like a headless chicken, trying to plan whatever he can in time for the big day. Unfortunately, it takes him hours to arrange everything, forcing him to stay up well into the early hours of the next day. Hence, when Dino decides to close his eyes for just a second, he completely sleeps through his alarms. If it hadn't been for his members waking him up, he would have also slept through your entire date. 

❀ The good news is that the members texted you to let you know in advance, and that you are gracious enough to still agree to the date. The bad news is that Dino's hard work has been for nought as the reservations have long passed. He feels incredibly guilty, but you reassure him that things like these happen.

❀ Instead of letting the mishap ruin the date further, you convince him to join you at the local playground. You spend the entire afternoon running around, playing games from your childhood and going down the slide. Your dinner consists of some snacks from a convenience store. It is wonderful.

masterlist

[lila-lou]

✨Paris - Pt. 2✨

Summary: The season 5 premiere of The Boys in Paris, which you were so excited about, became a dreaded event when you found out your difficult co-star Jensen Ackles would be there. Despite your best efforts to avoid him, Jensen's presence was present even at the post-premiere celebration. A few drinks too many led to a troubled night in your hotel room that left you torn and doubtful about your feelings.

Pairing: Jensen x Reader

Warnings: 18+ only! Smut, language, cheating, Jensen being a dick

Word Count: 5182

A/N: No hate towards anybody. It's just fiction.

English isn’t my first language, so please be lenient. 💙✨

It had been two months since that night in Paris, and although you hadn’t heard a word from Jensen, your mind was consumed by thoughts of him. No matter how hard you tried, you couldn’t forget how good he made you feel. The intensity of your time together lingered, an unshakeable memory that overshadowed even your time with Antony.

You hadn’t told Antony what had happened, afraid that it would ruin the fragile relationship you were building. You liked Antony a lot. He was kind, caring, and definitely boyfriend material. The sex was great, too—gentle, affectionate, and satisfying. But the night with Jensen was something else entirely. Jensen was something else entirely. He had ignited a fire within you that you couldn’t extinguish, no matter how hard you tried.

You found yourself repeatedly checking Jensen’s Instagram profile, eager to see something new, some hint of what he was up to. But in the past weeks, he had posted nothing but one picture of him and his wife, accompanied by a cheesy line that made your eyes roll. Hypocrite, you grumbled, tossing your phone aside in frustration.

“You said something?”, Antony’s voice broke through your thoughts as he emerged from the bathroom, a towel wrapped around his waist, his hair damp from the shower.

You forced a smile, shaking your head. “No, just thinking out loud”.

Antony walked over and sat beside you on the bed, his hand resting on your thigh. “You’ve been distracted lately”, he said gently, concern etched in his features. “Is everything okay?”.

You hesitated, the weight of your secret pressing down on you. “Yeah, just… work stress, I guess”, you lied, hoping he wouldn’t press further.

He studied you for a moment, his eyes searching yours. “But we’re on break”, he mumbled, his confusion evident. “What work stress?”.

You quickly scrambled for an explanation, grasping for the nearest truth. “It’s about the script”, you said, which wasn’t a total lie. “Soldier Boy and my character are supposed to actually get together in the next season, which implies a lot of… disturbing sex scenes”.

Antony’s brow furrowed, his concern deepening. “Disturbing how?”.

You sighed, grateful for the slight shift in focus. “Just… intense stuff. The writers are really pushing boundaries, and it’s been hard to wrap my head around it. It’s not the easiest material to work with”.

Antony started to get dressed, pulling on a pair of jeans and a t-shirt. “Oh, come on, honey”, he said, his tone both comforting and dismissive. “Jensen never made a woman uncomfortable on set. He’s known to be the easiest guy to shoot scenes like that with”.

You felt a pang of guilt and annoyance at his words, but you forced a smile. “I know, Antony. It’s just… it’s not about him. It’s about the content and how intense it is”.

He shrugged, giving you a reassuring smile. “It’s ‘The Boys,’ Y/N. All the scenes are intense. You knew what you were getting into when you took the role. But you’re an amazing actress. You’ll get through it”.

You nodded, feeling the weight of your secret pressing down on you even more. “Yeah, you’re right. Thanks for the pep talk”.

Antony finished getting dressed, smoothing down his shirt as he spoke. “Speaking of”, he mumbled, almost as if he was hesitant to bring it up, “Ackles is in town this weekend. He asked me to grab a drink, and… I thought… maybe this is the perfect start to make this official”. He pointed between the two of you, his eyes hopeful.

Your heart skipped a beat, panic rising in your chest. The idea of facing Jensen again, especially in such a setting, made your stomach churn. But you forced yourself to stay calm, to not let your inner turmoil show.

“Official?”, you echoed, trying to keep your voice steady. “You mean, you want to introduce me to Jensen as your girlfriend?”.

Antony nodded, a smile spreading across his face. “Yeah, exactly. I think it’s time, don’t you?”.

You swallowed hard. “Yeah”, you said softly.

Antony beamed, leaning in to kiss you softly. “Great! I’m really excited about this”, he said, pulling back with a smile that only made your guilt heavier.

You forced a smile in return, nodding. “Yeah, me too”.

As the weekend approached, the anxiety within you grew. You tried to focus on your work, immersing yourself in the script and preparing for the upcoming scenes.

Finally, the night of the meet-up arrived. You spent extra time getting ready, hoping to project a calm confidence that you didn’t feel. Antony was his usual cheerful self.

As soon as you stepped into the bar, you spotted Jensen engrossed in his phone. Your heart rate quickened, and you took a deep breath, trying to steady yourself. Antony, oblivious to your inner turmoil, led the way to the booth where Jensen sat.

When Jensen looked up and saw you, his eyebrows shot up in surprise for a brief moment before he quickly masked it. He stood up, greeting Antony with a friendly hug. Then he turned to you, his expression carefully neutral as he pulled you into a quick, tense hug. The contact sent a shiver down your spine, and you could feel the tension radiating off both of you.

“Wow”, Jensen said, stepping back and forcing a smile. “Never thought you’d show up with Y/N when you told me you were bringing your girlfriend”.

The three of you sat down, and Jensen’s gaze lingered on you longer than it should have, a subtle intensity in his eyes that made your heart race. “So, how long have you two been dating?”, he asked, his tone casual but with an undercurrent of something more.

Antony beamed, clearly excited to share. “About four months now”, he replied, his smile wide and genuine.

You saw Jensen quickly doing the math, a flicker of realization crossing his face. He knew instantly that you were already seeing Antony when the two of you were together in that hotel room. The knowledge seemed to settle over him, adding another layer of tension to the atmosphere.

“Four months, huh?”, Jensen said, his voice carefully controlled. “That’s great. You two seem really happy together”.

Antony nodded enthusiastically. “Yeah, we are. It’s been amazing getting to know Y/N. She’s really special”.

Jensen’s lips curled into a knowing smirk, and he leaned back in his seat. “Yeah, Y/N is pretty amazing”, he said, his tone dripping with a mixture of genuine admiration and something more intimate. “In fact, she’s amazing in so many ways”.

You felt your cheeks flush, a mix of embarrassment and frustration bubbling up inside you. You shot Jensen a warning look, but he simply raised an eyebrow, his smirk widening slightly.

Antony, oblivious to the underlying tension, laughed. “I know, right? She’s one of a kind”.

Jensen nodded, his eyes still locked onto yours. “Absolutely. It’s rare to find someone who can be so… multifaceted”.

Antony, always the joker, took a sip of his drink and smirked. “You know, Jensen, I’ve been reading the upcoming scenes between Soldier Boy and Y/N’s character. You better keep your hands to yourself now”, he said, laughing.

Jensen’s smirk didn’t falter, but his eyes flickered with a hint of something darker. “Oh, I’ll behave”, he replied smoothly. “I’m a professional, after all”.

You forced a laugh, trying to ease the tension. “It’s just acting, Antony. Nothing to worry about”.

Antony chuckled, completely unaware of the storm brewing beneath the surface. “I know, I know. I’m just messing around".

Jensen leaned forward slightly, his gaze still locked on you. “I promise, I’ll be the perfect gentleman”.

The rest of the evening continued in a similar vein, with Antony joking and chatting, while you and Jensen exchanged loaded glances, the tension between you thick and palpable.

Eventually, Antony suggested heading home. “It’s getting late”, he said, stifling a yawn. “Ready to go?”.

You nodded, eager to leave. “Yeah, let’s go”.

Back at your apartment, Antony kissed you goodnight. “I had a great time tonight”, he said, smiling. “Thanks for being so amazing”.

“You too”, you replied, forcing a smile. “Goodnight”.

With that, Antony left, heading to his own apartment since he had an early interview tomorrow and didn’t want to wake you up in the process of getting ready. He wasn’t even gone for ten minutes when there was a knock on the door.

You were already in your short silk pajama set, preparing to get some sleep. Thinking Antony might have forgotten something, you opened the door, a playful grin on your face.

“I thought you were too tired to get down and dirty”, you joked, expecting to see Antony. Instead, you were met with Jensen’s intense gaze.

Jensen leaned against the doorframe, a smirk playing on his lips. “Well, I guess I’m not as tired as your boyfriend”, he countered, his voice dripping with innuendo. “Seems like I can still rise to the occasion”.

Your cheeks flushed at his words, but you crossed your arms over your chest, trying to maintain your composure. “What the fuck are you doing here, Jensen?”, you asked, your tone sharp with annoyance.

Jensen didn’t wait for an invitation; he stepped inside, closing the door behind him. His eyes roamed over you, a predatory gleam in his gaze that made your heart race. “I came to talk”, he said, his voice low and teasing. “Or maybe to remind you of a few things”.

You huffed, rolling your eyes. “Remind me of what, exactly?”.

He took a step closer, his smirk widening. “The fact that you let me fuck you when you were already seeing Antony”, he said, his voice dripping with smug satisfaction. “And then you have the audacity to judge me about my wife”.

Your eyes widened, a mixture of anger and guilt bubbling up inside you. “That’s different”, you snapped. “Antony and I weren’t serious back then”.

Jensen raised an eyebrow, his smirk not faltering. “Is that what you tell yourself to feel better about it? Because, from what he said earlier, it sounds like for him you two had been pretty serious even back then”.

You felt a flush of shame and anger rise in you, your eyes narrowing. “You don’t know what you’re talking about, Jensen. You don’t know what it was like”.

“Oh, I think I have a pretty good idea”, he countered, stepping even closer until he was looming over you. His eyes darkened, and you could see the anger simmering just beneath the surface.

“Deep down, you’re just a hypocrite”, Jensen hissed, his voice low and filled with a barely contained rage. “You judge me about my wife, but you were already with Antony when you spread your legs for me. What does that say about you?”.

“Don’t you dare talk to me like that”, you spat, stepping back but finding yourself pressed against the wall. “You don’t know anything about me”.

He laughed bitterly. “I know enough. I know you’re the kind of woman who can’t make up her mind. You want to have it all, don’t you? The stable boyfriend and the exciting affair”.

You felt your anger rise, but you forced yourself to stay calm. “You came to me, Jensen. I didn’t chase after you. You were the one who made the first move”.

He laughed bitterly again, his eyes narrowing. “Oh, please. Don’t act like you didn’t want it. You didn’t seem to mind when you were moaning my name like there were no other words in your fucking vocabulary”.

You took a deep breath, trying to keep your composure despite Jensen’s provocation. His smirk was infuriatingly smug, but you refused to let him get under your skin further.

“Wow, Jensen”, you retorted, your voice dripping with sarcasm. “You seem to have an inflated sense of your own charm. I hate to break it to you, but not every moan is a declaration of undying love”.

Jensen’s smirk widened, clearly enjoying the banter. “Oh, come on, Y/N. You can’t deny that I left quite an impression”.

Rolling your eyes. “More like a stain that’s hard to get rid of”.

He chuckled. “Is that so? Tell me, then, why are you blushing?”.

Your cheeks burned, and you shot him a glare. “Because you’re insufferable”.

Jensen chuckled again, shaking his head. “Admit it, Y/N. You fucking loved it”.

You scoffed, trying to brush off his comment. “Don’t flatter yourself, Jensen”.

He raised an eyebrow teasingly. “Too late for that, isn’t it?”.

Jensen stepped closer, towering over you, his presence almost overwhelming. His eyes sparkled with mischief and something darker, making your pulse quicken.

“If I touched you now”, he whispered, his voice low and teasing, “would I find you fucking soaked?”.

You clenched your teeth, trying to ignore the shiver that ran down your spine at his words. “You’re delusional if you think you have that effect on me”, you shot back, trying to sound confident.

Jensen’s smirk only grew wider. “Delusional, huh?”. He moved even closer, his hand brushing lightly against your hip. “Care to prove me wrong?”.

You swallowed hard, your body betraying you as a wave of heat pooled in your core. “You’re impossible”, you managed to say, your voice trembling.

He leaned in, his lips just inches from your ear. “And you’re avoiding the question”, he murmured. “What are you so afraid of, Y/N?”.

You took a shaky breath, trying to steady yourself. “I’m not afraid of anything”, you lied, knowing full well that the truth was the exact opposite.

Jensen’s hand slid down to your thigh, his touch sending sparks through your body. “Then let me”, he whispered, his voice seductive and commanding. “Let me see just how much you’re pretending”.

You hesitated, torn between anger and the undeniable pull you felt toward him. His fingers brushed the hem of your shorts, and your resolve wavered.

You were unable to move, unable to speak. Jensen’s presence was overwhelming, his touch intoxicating. The words you wanted to say died on your lips as his hand moved with agonizing slowness, slipping beneath the waistband of your shorts. His fingers traced a delicate path along your skin, each touch sending shivers through your body.

“Jensen”, you breathed, your voice trembling with a mix of fear and anticipation.

His eyes locked onto yours, dark and intense. “Tell me to stop”, he whispered, his breath hot against your ear, “and I will”.

But you couldn’t. Your body betrayed you, leaning into his touch, craving more. Instead of words, a soft gasp escaped your lips as his fingers continued their journey, slipping under the thin fabric of your panties. The heat of his hand against your most sensitive skin made you shiver, your knees threatening to give way.

Jensen’s fingers moved slowly, savoring the moment as he explored your most intimate places. He traced the contours of your skin with a delicate touch, as if committing every detail to memory. His fingers dipped lower, gently parting your folds and sliding through the slickness he found there.

The sensation was electric, sending a jolt of pleasure straight through you. Jensen’s touch was both gentle and commanding, his fingers tracing lazy circles around your clit, teasing and tantalizing. Your breath hitched, your body responding to his touch with a mind of its own.

“You’re so wet”, Jensen murmured, his voice low and filled with satisfaction. “I knew you would be”.

You shivered, a soft moan escaping your lips as his fingers continued their slow, deliberate movements. He stroked lightly at first, drawing out your anticipation, before increasing the pressure just enough to make you gasp. The pleasure was immediate and overwhelming, your body responding to his touch with a mind of its own.

“Tell me how it feels”, he whispered, his lips brushing against your ear. “I want to hear you say it”.

“It feels…”, you struggled to find the words, your mind foggy with pleasure. “It feels so good”.

He smirked against your skin, his fingers never faltering. “That’s what I thought”.

His fingers continued their slow, deliberate movements, each stroke drawing out your pleasure, making you crave more. He circled your clit with a maddeningly gentle touch, sending sparks of pleasure through your body, making your hips buck involuntarily.

“You like that, don’t you?”, he whispered, his voice low and seductive.

Jensen’s whispered question hung in the air, his touch never ceasing as he continued to explore and provoke. You tried to muster your composure, to push back against his control, even as your body betrayed you with every involuntary twitch and moan.

“I hate you”, you managed to gasp out, the words more breath than voice, laced with a desperate attempt at defiance.

He chuckled lowly, the sound dark and alluring right next to your ear. “No, you don’t”, he murmured back, his breath warm against your skin. His fingers skillfully continued their dance, pressing just a bit more firmly, pushing you closer to the edge.

“Stop”, you whispered, half-hearted, your hands gripping his wrists not to pull away, but to keep him exactly where he was. “You shouldn’t be doing this…”.

Jensen’s other hand gently cradled the back of your neck, his thumb brushing soothingly at the base of your skull. “But you want me to”, he countered softly, his voice both a taunt and a promise as his fingers maintained their maddening pace.

Each stroke seemed to draw a line between pleasure and your fraying willpower. “You’re awful”, you accused, the words choked out amidst shudders as waves of warmth spread from the epicenter of his touch.

“And yet, here you are”, Jensen teased, pressing a gentle kiss to your forehead, a stark contrast to the boldness of his other hand. His touch became even more insistent, his pace quickening slightly, coaxing another moan from your lips, this one less about your verbal battle and more about the physical sensations overtaking you.

“You make it so hard to think”, you admitted, the fight draining out of you as pleasure built up, threatening to wash everything else away.

“That’s the point”, he whispered back, his lips grazing your ear. The simple admission was enough to unravel you further.

As the pleasure crested, your grip on his wrist tightened, your body tensing, ready to tip over into the abyss.

“Jensen”, you breathed out, your voice a mix of warning and plea.

He didn’t stop, didn’t slow, his movements both deliberate and attuned to every reaction of your body. “Let go, Y/N. Just let go”, he urged, his voice as compelling as the motions of his hand.

And then you did, your world narrowing down to the explosive sensations that his fingers wrought, cascading through you in waves of intense release. You cried out, a sound that mixed your frustration with your release, and for a moment, nothing else mattered—not the complications, not the consequences, just the overwhelming tide of pleasure that Jensen had promised and delivered.

As you slowly came back down, panting and spent, Jensen’s arms enveloped you more fully, holding you close in a gentle embrace that felt like a soothing balm after the storm. His hand stroked your back gently.

You rested your head against his chest, feeling the rapid beat of his heart beneath your cheek. Your breath slowly steadied, the aftermath of your climax leaving a languid warmth in your limbs. As you nestled closer, you couldn’t help but notice the prominent bulge pressing against your thigh, evidence of Jensen’s arousal straining against his jeans.

You lifted your head, your eyes meeting his. There was a raw intensity in his gaze, a mixture of satisfaction and unfulfilled desire. His control was slipping, the restraint he’d maintained fraying at the edges.

“You’re… hard”, you murmured, your voice still breathless from your recent release. It was a statement more than a question, an acknowledgment of the tension that still hummed between you.

Jensen’s lips quirked into a half-smile, a glint of mischief returning to his eyes. “I’d be worried if I wasn’t”, he replied, his voice low and rough. His fingers traced slow, lazy patterns on your back, but his eyes never left yours.

You felt a surge of boldness, a desire to see him come undone as completely as he’d unraveled you. Slowly, you slid your hand down his chest, your fingers tracing the hard planes of his muscles, feeling the warmth of his skin through the fabric of his shirt. When you reached the waistband of his jeans, you hesitated, your eyes searching his for permission.

Jensen’s breath hitched, his grip on your back tightening slightly. “You don’t have to”, he said, though the hunger in his eyes told you how much he wanted it.

“I want to”, you whispered, your voice steady despite the thrumming of your pulse. Your fingers deftly unbuttoned his jeans, the sound of the zipper echoing in the charged silence of the room.

As you reached inside, you felt the heat of him, the hard length straining against the fabric of his boxers. You wrapped your hand around him, feeling his sharp intake of breath, the way his body tensed beneath your touch.

“Y/N”, he groaned, his voice a desperate rasp as you stroked him, your movements slow and deliberate. The control he’d held over you was slipping away, replaced by a vulnerability that only made your connection feel deeper, more intense.

With a determined look in your eyes, you tugged gently at the waistband of Jensen’s boxers, easing them down over his hips. As the fabric slipped away, his arousal sprang free, hard and ready. You took a moment to appreciate the sight, feeling a thrill of anticipation and satisfaction at seeing him so vulnerable and wanting.

Jensen’s breath hitched again, his eyes never leaving yours. His hands rested on your shoulders, his grip tightening slightly as you wrapped your hand around his length, your touch deliberate and teasing. You stroked him slowly, your thumb brushing over the sensitive tip, feeling the slickness there.

He groaned deeply, the sound resonating through his chest.

Slowly, you leaned forward, your lips parting as you took him into your mouth. The warmth and wetness of your mouth made him gasp, his hips bucking slightly in response.

You worked him with a deliberate rhythm, your movements slow and sensual, taking your time to explore and savor every inch of him. Your hand moved in tandem with your mouth, stroking the base of his length while your tongue swirled around the tip. Jensen’s reactions were immediate and intense, his hands tangling in your hair, his breaths coming in ragged gasps.

“Fuck, Y/N”, he groaned, his voice a mixture of desperation and pleasure. “That feels so good”.

You continued your slow, deliberate pace, enjoying the way his body responded to your touch, the way he seemed to unravel beneath you. Each moan and gasp from him spurred you on, driving you to take him deeper, to push him closer to the edge.

Jensen’s groans became more desperate, his hips moving in sync with your mouth. He glanced down at you.

“Finally using that dirty mouth of yours for something good”, he teased, his voice a strained whisper.

The remark sent a spark of defiance through you, and you responded by gently biting down on him, just enough to make him gasp. The reaction was immediate—his grip on your hair tightened, and with a sudden, possessive urgency, he pushed his hips forward, sliding himself deeper into your throat.

You gagged slightly but adjusted quickly, letting him take control as his movements became more forceful. Jensen’s breath hitched, his hands firm on your head as he guided you, his pace becoming more frantic. “Fuck", he groaned, his voice rough with need. “Just like that”.

His words fueled your desire to please him, and you relaxed your throat, allowing him to thrust deeper. The intensity of the sensation was overwhelming, but you relished it, your hands gripping his thighs for support as he moved.

Jensen’s moans grew louder, his body trembling with the effort to hold back. “I’m so close”, he warned, his voice a desperate rasp.

You hummed around him, the vibration pushing him even closer to the edge. With a final, shuddering thrust, Jensen let out a deep, guttural moan, his release hitting you in powerful waves.

Jensen’s body shuddered with the intensity of his climax, his grip on your hair tightening momentarily as he rode out the waves of pleasure. As he began to come down from his high, he looked down at you, his eyes still dark with desire. He gently pulled back, allowing his length to slip from your mouth.

His hand cupped your chin, tilting your head up to meet his gaze. With his thumb, he pressed down on your bottom lip, opening your mouth slightly. “Let me see”, he murmured, his voice still thick with arousal.

You opened your mouth wider, showing him the evidence of his release pooled on your tongue. Jensen’s eyes darkened further, a satisfied smirk playing on his lips. “Good girl”, he whispered. “Now, swallow”.

You obeyed, closing your mouth and swallowing his release, the action sending a shiver of satisfaction through you. Jensen watched you intently, his thumb brushing over your lips as you did. The intimacy of the moment was palpable, the connection between you both deeper than before.

“Perfect”, he murmured, his thumb gently tracing your jawline. He leaned down, capturing your lips in a soft, lingering kiss, tasting himself on your tongue. The kiss was tender, a stark contrast to the intensity that had just passed between you.

Jensen pulled back slowly, his fingers still lingering on your jawline. He looked down at you with a satisfied smirk.

“You know”, he murmured, his voice low and teasing, “you might actually be worth all this trouble after all”.

The sting of Jensen’s words lingered, and you couldn’t shake the overwhelming sense of guilt and regret that crashed over you. You pulled away from him, unable to bear the closeness any longer. Without a word, you turned and walked quickly into the bathroom, shutting the door behind you.

You stared at your reflection in the mirror, the emotions swirling inside you almost too much to bear. Your hands trembled as you reached for your toothbrush, squeezing toothpaste onto it with a shaky grip. You began to brush your teeth furiously, trying to scrub away the lingering taste and the disgust you felt towards yourself.

A few moments later, the door creaked open, and Jensen stepped inside. He rolled his eyes at the sight of you furiously brushing your teeth, his expression shifting from concern to annoyance.

“Really?”, he said, his voice dripping with irritation. “You’re brushing your teeth? That’s your solution?”.

You paused mid-brush, meeting his gaze in the mirror, feeling a mix of anger and shame bubbling up inside you. “I feel disgusting”, you snapped, spitting out the toothpaste and rinsing your mouth.

Jensen crossed his arms over his chest, leaning against the doorframe. “Yeah, but brushing your teeth isn’t going to wash away what happened”, he said, his tone teasing but with an edge of frustration. “You think a little toothpaste will fix this?”.

Tears gathered in your eyes, blurring your vision as you glared at him in the mirror. “Do you have to make everything a joke, Jensen?”, you choked out, the hurt and guilt overwhelming you. “I’m trying to deal with this the best I can”.

His expression softened slightly, the irritation in his eyes giving way to concern. He pushed off the doorframe and stepped closer, his tone gentler. “You really are a delicate little flower, aren’t you?”, he teased softly, but there was no malice in his voice.

You sniffled, wiping at your eyes with the back of your hand. “Don’t mock me”, you whispered, feeling vulnerable and exposed.

Jensen placed a hand on your shoulder, his touch gentle and his gaze almost soft. He looked at you with a mix of concern and curiosity, clearly trying to navigate the storm of emotions swirling between you.

You sniffled again, your voice barely above a whisper. “Why didn’t you just stay away, Jensen?”.

His brow furrowed in surprise, and he tilted his head slightly. “You’re blaming me now?”, he asked, a hint of incredulity in his tone.

You shook his hand away, feeling a surge of anger rise within you. “Leave me alone”, you hissed, your voice sharper than you intended as you brushed past him and walked out of the bathroom.

Jensen stood there for a moment, clearly taken aback by your reaction. You could feel his gaze following you, but you didn’t look back. You made your way into the bedroom, your mind a whirlwind of conflicting emotions. Anger, guilt, and a deep sense of confusion battled for dominance within you.

You sat on the edge of the bed, your hands trembling slightly. The silence between you and Jensen was thick with tension, and you could hear him moving slowly out of the bathroom, his footsteps hesitant as he approached.

“Y/N”, he began, his voice softer now. “I didn’t mean to—”.

“Just stop, Jensen”, you interrupted, your voice breaking. “Just don’t come near me again”.

Jensen rolled his eyes, frustration clear on his face. “We work together, Y/N. We can’t just avoid each other”.

“Then keep it fucking professional”, you shot back, your voice trembling with emotion. “Outside of work, I don’t want to see you. I don’t want to talk to you. Just stay away from me”.

Jensen’s jaw tightened, and he took a deep breath, clearly trying to control his temper. “Fine”, he said, his voice cold. “If that’s what you want”.

You looked away, feeling a mix of relief and sadness at his words. “It is”.

He lingered for a moment, as if he wanted to say something more, but then he turned and walked towards the door. “I’ll see you on set”, he said.

As the door closed behind him, you let out a shuddering breath.

You sat there for a while, the silence of the room enveloping you, trying to sort through your tangled emotions.

———————————

A/N: Please let me know what you think.🥰

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Part 3

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Taglist: @suckitands33 @jackles010378 @spnfamily-j2 @cheynovak @anacarolinadasf @winchesterwild78

[alieinthemorning]

Mission Accomplished [Caleb]

Content: Major Character Death, Angst, Written Before Caleb's Official Release, Reader-Insert

Pronouns: None

Note: I see Caleb within the childhood friend trope. Anything outside of that makes me uncomfortable, so I won't be engaging with it in any sort of way.

Reblogs: Let me know that you enjoy my work and want to see more, so don’t forget to like and reblog (and comment in the tags. I love seeing people’s rambles in the tags)!

This work’s concepts, plot and original characters are my own which means I do not allow any sort of creative theft nor do I allow my work to be entered into any sort of A.I. bots. Thank you for respecting my space and boundaries

Wanna support me? Here’s my Ko-Fi!

“It doesn’t have to be this way!” You had your gun aimed at him, body trembling in palpable fear.  

Caleb frowns. This was the hunter of the UNICORNS Alpha Team? He holds back a sigh of irritation. Caleb is privy to most things concerning you, and your placement in the UNICORN Alpha division was no feat made by your own merits. You were placed there by EVER’s discretion, and it is honestly a miracle that you haven’t died already. 

This time he does sigh. You truly are pathetic. He wonders why he truly was created if this was all he ever had to go up against. 

You were nothing more than a failure. 

Your voice cuts through his thoughts. “Please, Caleb!”

Your plea makes him pause. He takes a moment to think about what was most likely your very simple thought process. 

You probably were caught up in all the memories of your time together. For you, they were special, to him, it was nothing more than a mission. You were caught up in a false him that never truly existed, and now you were begging for him to “go back to normal”. Unfortunately for you, while you were dying and being sheltered by memory lost. He was forced to live out this hell. 

So, even if the two of you did run away together it would just end up with you both being dragged back to hell to do this damned song and dance all over again. However, only he would be alive for the descent. And what would be the point of that when he has two functional legs to carry him there?

BANG

“Subject 001 has been terminated.” 

“Copy. Bring it to the drop-off point.”

Caleb lifts his gaze from your lifeless body to the cloudless sky. He shifts his cap forward to shield his eyes from the onslaught of rain.

A mirthless laugh bubbles to the surface. “It’s a terrible day for rain.”  

I had a whole other homecoming fic planned, but his trailer blew that shit straight outta the water, so y'all are getting this instead :)

I hope this hurt.

Feral shit incoming later at the usual place tho lmao

Ko-Fi | Masterlist

[sunny-mercya]

Red Water

Poly! Billy Loomis and Stu Macher x FTMale Reader

Fandom -> Scream 1996

Requested by -> Anon

Masterlist

Warning: Mention of Period and Blood,

The clean water, with a bit added soap, in the bathtub, once scorching hot—frogging up the window and mirror, leaving glistening droplets on the tiles behind—had long ago turned cold—creating goosebumps on the naked skin and the red water couldn't be any redder anymore, a strong smell of iron lingering in the air.

The first two days—in your monthly week of still remaining Period, a deadweight to endure till it could be finally removed—were always the easiest to manage with barley any pain nor blood, but once the third day hits the mark, it comes crashing in like a unseen flood.

Skyrocketing high waves of pain, so unbearable and uncomfortable that not even four pills of heavy dosed painkillers seemed to help—letting you go into a hysteria of crying and screaming, wanting nothing more but to stab yourself into the stomach and ripping out that reminder of former—of something which you never were to begin with—anatomy still existing inside of you.

And with the pain, so comes the blood and it surely was way more blood than it should be—causing still a great worry for your older siblings, Doctor and Boyfriends—because the amount of blood you're losing within the next three days—when your period has their actual start—could be almost considered of needing a constant transfusion to keep you stable.

So you thought, because sometimes it seemed to help, a good hot bath could soothe your pain—but today it just didn't work and so you continued to lay in the bathtub till the water turned cold and became a murky smelly red.

~~~

»[Name]? Did you fall asleep in there?« Billy knocked on the bathroom door for a third time, annoyance mixing with worry—as you had been in the bathroom for over four hours now and that was never a good sign to begin with.

Billy thought, when you had announced, hours ago—in a small barley audible whisper—you would take a bath, he could do a quick grocery trip—but like said before, that was hours ago and now he's back in your home and you're still in the bathroom.

Billy knocked again, hand sliding up to the doorknob, ready to burst in—if the door is locked, which shouldn't even be—and for once ignoring the boundary of respecting privacy.

It wasn't like Billy or Stu hadn't seen you naked, just not completely nude as it was always only your chest—which after your breast surgery, you liked to show proudly and with a good amount of self confidence and love—and sometimes your and only your ass, when Stu felt like being a naughty silly little shit—and nothing more, after all you had made it pretty clear to them how much you valued the privacy of your body.

»Still no response? Maybe he really did fall asleep?« comment Stu, leaning against the wall and arms slightly crossed.

»Sleeping in cold water for damn four hours? I don't think so. [Name]! We're coming in now!« Billy turned the knob, opening the door and once the ironing smell comes into his nose—Billy was close to recoil, holding back a gag.

Of course Billy had seen blood before, knew that irony smell well, but this was something else—this smell was more foul and more intense, leaving a taste of disgust behind.

»Pff, looks like the red sea, doesn't it?« Stu snorted a bit at his own joke, getting hit in the stomach by Billy within minutes later.

»Not funny Stu. Not the damn time.« gritted Billy out, glaring at Stu slightly—pushing the lanky tall frame of his boyfriend a bit out of way.

»[Name]? Still with us?« Billy asked, getting near the tub, crouching down and poking a finger at your cheek.

You didn't respond, reacted at all, even though you heard your boyfriends very clearly, you just couldn't answer—brain feeling numb and tongue tied up.

Billy sighed out through his nose, dunking his hands into the murky red water and under your armpits—practically fishing you up and out of the tub, waiting for Stu to put the bathrobe around you, before carrying you into your bedroom.

~~~

The texture of the bathrobe and towels, which grazed your naked skin—especially your ass—felt rough and unpleasant, not so soft as they once were before.

There was no other choice of way though, with the heavy bleeding you do, your older sister had long ago established the rule—after you had stained all your underwear, pants and a lot of bedsheets into a mass pile of red colour—that you have to lay on these large towels and wear—when at home—a bathrobe, because you could stain them as much as you want—as your sister didn't need to wash so often than (or rebuy bedsheets and clothes again)

What's even worse to feel, besides the rough texture, is the knowing flowing wetness of blood—which you could practically feel dripping—down there, making you grimace in discomfort.

Stu, not completely aware of your distressing situation—because that's more Billy's area of knowledge—pressed the two hot water bottles a bit harder onto your stomach, believing the pain is the reason for your grimacing face.

»Did he already took painkillers? Maybe we should add up to like ten, maybe than those cramps are going down,« Stu mused out his thoughts, perking up when something akin to an sniffle or small cry like sound emitting from your lips.

»Sometimes, Stu, I'm really question your ability of mind.« Billy looked absolutely done with Stu's nonsense, raising a brow—scowling in slight annoyance.

Stu had the mind of a gutter, when it comes to human senses and the ability of emotional intelligence (and empathy)—but when it comes to mathematics, physics and science, he's a real genius for such subjects (Billy find absolutely boring)

»Just saying, doubling the medications might do wonders of reduce« shrugging his shoulders, Stu turned his attention back to you, grinning brightly he leaned down—pecking your lips.

There was no doubt though, that Stu was way better in showing affection than Billy—as Stu is more extrovert, a people and party person.

Billy shook his head, taking also a seat next to you—forcing a straw to your lips, knowing very well that you have to stay hydrated and having to intake more sugar into your bloodstream, otherwise you would collapse and being send to the hospital.

»C'mon [Nickname] drink up.« Billy said it like a command and when you took a few sips, Billy praised you with a compliment of „Good boy“

Some week in the months might be hard, but with two Boyfriends, like Billy and Stu, at your side—you knew you're in good hands as these two make sure that you're feeling good and comfortable, treating you like a prince.

Simply because, if you can give them love—showering them in a bliss of affection—they can give you comfort in return.

[twst-drabbles]

Jamil 14

Summary: He attempts to close the distance and yet always pulls away at the last moment, as though trying to protect his heart from anymore hurt. You guess you’ll have to make the first move, just so he knows you don’t mind if he seeks you out for intimacy.

(In a monster lover mood. And in a Jamil mood. So, Sanctuary Jamil is gonna get the kiss he’s been craving.)

Honestly, if there was anything that Jamil wanted, you’d probably give without a second thought.

You didn’t mind when, in the kitchen while preparing for dinner, Jamil drifted his tail around your walking space. You didn’t mind when, in a fit of sputtering laughter, Jamil leaned his weight right on your shoulder and shuddered in a breath. You didn’t even mind when Jamil touched the tips of your fingers.

You didn’t mind at all. But, Jamil keeps retreating. You wouldn’t have thought anything of it if it weren’t for that. His pauses, his hesitation, his pulling back, there was something tender growing within Jamil. And this tenderness scares him. Or, perhaps he’s scared that this tenderness would frighten you? Well, either way…

Jamil’s tail would twitch then slide right back behind him. Jamil’s would gasp right next to your ear and stand up away from you. Jamil’s hand would stiffen and drift away from you.

You didn’t say anything solely because Jamil would never say sorry. He wouldn’t acknowledge it, preferring to ignore it altogether. You’re not immature, you know not to take any hurt from this. All this was not made with the intention to hurt, it’s the result of Jamil being hurt and scarred.

So you didn’t push for anything. You didn’t turn around and demand Jamil acknowledge anything, because you know this familiar and you know that he would retreat fully into himself. You don’t care for a tender heart by exposing it to the one it beats for most. You wait, you beckon, and you lead.

“Come here,” you didn’t grab at Jamil’s hand, you lightly tapped at his finger tips and let go just as easily.

“Oh? Do you need me for something?” His speech was entirely normal, but his gaze was focused on his hand. He was quick to recover.

“Nothing that will take too much time,” you opened the door to your bedroom, “I know you have quite a bit of cleaning to do.”

Jamil spine straightened just a bit. He’s been in your room plenty of times and yet, whatever is going on in his head, it made him stiff. You chuckled as you walked in with him, and Jamil’s eyes refused to settle on your face. His very small, almost shuddering, fond sigh reaffirmed what you suspected. He won’t run off and hide.

“Take a seat,” you gestured to your bed after sitting on it, “I want to do something.”

Any other person and you’re sure Jamil would ask for specifics. You know he hates nothing more than being involved in things that he doesn’t have the details for.

But he sat without question. You don’t dare assume that he did that out of ignorance or pure blind trust. The darkness of the room, the close pressing of your shoulder to his, the intimate privacy and just your tantalizing vagueness, you’re very sure Jamil suspects something.

But he’s still afraid. Afraid of crossing this boundary that he probably thinks you have, of permanently changing this easy back and forth that allowed Jamil peace of mind. Did he think you would be disgusted by his affection? That he would one day go too far and you’d snap him back into reality with an uncomfortable and apologetic smile?

“I’m going to be selfish, for a moment,” you brushed your hands on the sides of Jamil’s face. You felt him jump but he didn’t wretch himself away. Rather than reach in and yank his feelings out into the open, it’s better to frame it as though you’re the one that wants more, so that if something horrible happens, Jamil can blame you all he likes. “Do you mind?”

His eyes were wide and his breath almost gone. Then he calmed down, settling into the rhythm you’re trying to lead him in. His eyes calmed from their frantic shaking, his lids lowering as he lost himself in your hands.

“No,” his words were a whisper, afraid to break this moment as you guided Jamil to lean closer, to press his forehead against yours, “If you want to be more selfish, then you can take my entire being. I won’t mind at all.”

“Don’t regret it, then,” and you lightly closed the distance, dropping a light peck just to test the grounds of what’s too much and what’s not for Jamil.

You were worried for nothing. In his eagerness, Jamil jumped forward and pressed further into the kiss. You had to pull back to laugh for a moment before pulling Jamil right back in. He must have been holding back too long. How cute.

You’ll let him indulge for as long as he wants. You adore him too much not to.

[juniperdugong]

Perfection Pt.4; Nightfall

Waking from a nap in Mingyu's arms leads to some awkwardness. You get that new phone he's been talking about. Oh! And he breaks into the morgue. Surely, this ends well, right?

Pairing: mortician!mingyu x corpse!fem!reader

Genre: Mortician!au, Horror!au || Fluff, Crack, Romance, Angst || Inspired by Frankenstein and other undead media

Warnings: Mentions of death and corpses (Nothing in-depth and nothing intended to disturb) || Mentions of suicide || Necro-romance, aka romantic attraction to a corpse. || {Please let me know if there are other warnings you would like me to add}

WC: 4.6k

Songs that inspired this fic

Series Masterlist

Rousing from your nap you let yourself follow the warm embrace that held you. Falling into the crook of the neck of the person beside you, holding them tightly, inhaling their scent, and finding the utmost comfort in it. Mingyu. The only memorable smell that has been able to invade your mind like a drug since you've been alive. Snuggling ever closer you smiled gently into his chest-

Wait. Hold on. In your waking daze, you hadn't even processed what was happening right now. Arms? Around you? Mingyu's scent? With apprehension, you raise your head and your fear is confirmed. Mingyu. Is. Holding. You.

Startled you push against his chest, attempting to create any type of distance as your face is getting as hot and red as a coil stovetop. But Mingyu's arms are trapping you in place.

The sudden movement stirs Gyu, his eyes lazily opening to meet yours. A grin meets his face before he's suddenly being shifted across the bed. In your surprise, you can't help but shove him with a strength you did not intend.

"Shi- I'm sorry- I-" You're suddenly rushing for an explanation. "It's okay- I mean I'm sor-" And he is too. "No, I didn't mean to fall asleep-" "I…Well, I did mean to give you a hug. I'm so sorry though, we talked abo-" The two of you are suddenly giggling at the string of confused statements that neither of you is sure makes sense. A nice silence washes over after the amusement but you're mind quickly turns, I should probably leave, the thought crosses your mind and you gather yourself and stand up.

"I didn't mind you sleeping in my bed, y/n." Mingyu looks up at you as he moves to sit on the edge with an expectant stare. He wants you to stay. Wants you to want him as badly as he wants you right now. And you do! But the talk from last night solidified something within you, you need time to stretch just a bit more to make this feel right, to make it feel deserved. Playing with your bottom lip between your teeth you decide to leave the room. Before you go Mingyu reaches out to you, his hand lightly gripping your wrist begging you to come back to him, but you resist, telling him that he should change out of his day clothes before dinner. He hits the bed as he falls backward, watching as you close the door. You both leave the situation unsatisfied.

The rest of the day goes by in still awkwardness. The idle talk that usually has both of you engrossed has suddenly become dull and tense. This is what you were talking about. This is the needed tensity that must come with getting to know one another, the hurdle of being uncomfortable with each other. It can't always be easy comfort and conversation, unfortunately.

It's killing Mingyu, it's killing him to the point of wanting to go back and erase what he said, erase what he did. The overstepping of a boundary is a serious thing and he's been beating himself up over it. It isn't like you said anything to spur this on and it's not like you look uncomfortable next to him, in fact, it looks rather normal other than the absence of jovial talk between you two. His jaw is tensing as he thinks about what to do, how to solve this pit of worry in his stomach. And it doesn't go unnoticed, his fingers are fidgeting with the spoon in his hand and he hasn't taken a bite in several minutes.

"Gyu?" The nickname snaps him back to life, "Hmm?" "You okay?" "Huh? Oh, yeah I'm okay, I'm good." He mulls it over a million times in his within a split second. "Y/n?" "Yeah?" "I'm really sorry." "For what?" "For…" his shoulders slump, "Crossing the boundaries we set last night. I shouldn't have hugged you. I'm really sorry. You said you wanted to slow down and that was the complete opposite."

The way he's staring at the ceiling like a child admitting something warms your heart. He was thinking about that this whole time? You didn't know what was causing the teeth-grinding unease between you two but it definitely wasn't because he hugged you to sleep. You hadn't even thought about that part, if anything, you falling asleep on his bed was what you thought this was about.

"Mingyu, it's okay. I forgive you." The biggest weight sloughs off of him as you say that. "I thought you were mad at me if anything…" "Mad at you? Why would I be mad at you?" "I went into your room when you weren't here and I ended up taking a nap on your bed…" You're flushed with embarrassment as you recall what you had done. "I-" he wants to tell you what he did before, that he doesn't mind you sleeping in his room, that he wants you to sleep there...with him. But the thought of crossing the line again tolls on his mind. "It's okay, I really didn't mind at all. Like I said the first night it's more comfortable than the guest bed" he gives an amused hum.

With the air feeling a lot lighter you both go about the night time routine that you've established over the past 2 nights. Before bed Mingyu knocks on your door to tell you goodnight and for some reason, the act just feels so innocent, pure, and adolescent. Blushes adorn both your faces afterward, like some lovesick teenagers, hearts beating like drums until night takes you.

The next day is rather uneventful. You wake to an empty house again, Mingyu leaves another note to remind you to eat, and you do what you can in the way of cleaning (Not that there's much you can clean in an already spotless home). The only off thing was the additional ask in Mingyu's note.

"I'm heading off, forgive me for not waking you to say goodbye. Like yesterday I made you some meals in the fridge, please eat them well! Also, if you wouldn't mind being ready by the time I come home, I want to get you that phone that I wrote about yesterday. Have a good day, y/n :)"

With a lack of things to do to keep you from boredom you decide to get ready hours ahead of time. Carefully picking out an outfit from the clothes you and Mingyu had picked out during your shopping trip. Makeup, in your case, was a must! At the very least to make you look less…gray and well dead.

You sat in front of your vanity trying to recollect how this process goes. The process is almost like meditation, trying to dig deep enough within yourself to remember how to make yourself look and feel good.

Sat in front of a bathroom mirror you stare at yourself. The dark circles under your eyes have further sunken since the last time you allowed yourself to look in the mirror. The tear stains are evident in the darkened corner of your eyes. You look sickly. A scornful look pains you as you look at yourself. You hate this. You hate you. How did it get to this point? This amount of self-loathing and isolation? Your body is a monster, not made to be loved by anyone but yourself. Who could even love you?

The memory strikes you like a dagger to the heart and mind. Tears trickle down your cheeks.

That was the day before you passed.

The day that you decided that you weren't long for this planet.

How things would change in a matter of a week and some change. Dying might've been the best thing to have happened to you. It allowed you a chance to live again, as ironic as that might sound. Kim Mingyu gave you the chance of a full life, a life with him.

Staring at your face in the mirror those terrible thoughts plague you again but this time you don't allow them to define life or death. You stare and you see the memory of Mingyu and you at the vanity, talking about taking things slow, the way his hand caressed your shoulder, his eyes all on you. No, you don't have to hate yourself in this life too.

Mingyu comes home and is immediately greeted by the sound of you in the kitchen. He celebrates quietly that the house isn't silent like yesterday.

You're washing the dishes from a rather late lunch; Getting ready took longer than you'd like to admit with the sudden memory that had come back. Standing by yourself humming along to an unknown song with Mingyu's apron hanging a bit longer than intended on your body, he stares in awe. How could you be so perfect? So unaware that you radiated such happiness? After taking in the scene he saunters into the kitchen.

"I'm home~" "Oh! I didn't hear the door. I should've come to greet you." You're scrounging around for a towel the moment you see Gyu. "It's fine, I came in quietly in case you were sleeping again" He smirks to himself as he grabs the roll of paper towels and hands it to you. "How could I sleep knowing that I had to be ready?" "I don't know, you slept pretty soundly yesterday. Maybe it's your hobby…" You scoff at him and lightly punch at his shoulder. "You ready to get that phone?"

You guys head to the phone company after quickly gathering your stuff. Getting in Mingyu's car you remember that the last time you were in here was when he was taking you from the morgue. The silent drive that was full of contemplation and nerves. Now the car is filled with music and ease, Mingyu's hand gently tapping along with the drums as he drives. "As my memory rest but never forgets what I lost~ Wake me up when September ends~" Gyu sings under his breath and a content smile grows on his face as he glances over and you're steadily bouncing along as well.

The process itself was rather swift. The man at the phone company had taken you through all the newest models of phones and the latest deals on phone plans. The only interruptions or questions made were when Mingyu perked up to ask about unlimited data and messaging, somewhere within that he had also mentioned that he only wanted the best for his "Wife". The statement caught you by surprise but it seemed like Gyu had no issue as he just continued to nod along with the man as he signed the papers and handed them to you to sign. In the end, you were able to get a very good plan and the latest Galaxy Z flip phone.

The entire ride home you thought about Gyu's words, his mention of you as his "wife". Had that been a mistake on his part? You choke on the lump in your throat as Gyu speaks.

"Do you like it?" "Hmm?" "Your phone, do you like it?" He looks at you as he stops at a red light, your confusion amusing him, "If you want we can always turn back and get something mor-" "Oh no this is completely fine, great in fact! Very cute!" "Thank goodness! I thought we were actually gonna have to go back for a second" he laughs. "I don't know if you mind but I took the liberty of putting my number in when you were signing papers." "Don't mind at all, makes it easier for me." He nods and turns up the music. "Just give me a call or text me whenever you need to…or want to. I'll always want to talk to you." He says nonchalantly, not taking his eyes off the road. "I will definitely do that. Don't mind if I spam you, right?" "Never. I'd enjoy each message even if you wrote things out letter by letter." You smile and give a curt nod as to signify you're actually taking that into suggestion.

You spend some time customizing your phone before you sleep. Occasionally letting your mind drift off and thinking about what Gyu had said earlier his "wife", you smile at the thought.

Hovering over Mingyu's number, the only number on the phone currently, you think about what you want your first message to be. You think about texting him about what he had said before but honestly, you've had enough awkwardness for a while. Before doing anything too hasty you decide to change his name, "Gyu", and realize that you don't have any pictures of him to add to his contact.

- Hey Gyu, it's y/n - Still up? - Yeah Fixing up my phone - Ah okay - You mind sending me a photo for your contact? - {Picture}

Your heart flutters at the sight of him in his bed, cuddled up with his sheets. You have to stop yourself from grinning too hard as you copy his pose. You go the extra mile of making him your lock screen, if he brings it up you resolve to tell him that you haven't any other pictures. You lay in bed staring at your phone for an eternity before sending Mingyu a quick "Goodnight, hope you sleep well and wake up rested for work tomorrow!", quickly shoving the phone away and trying your best not to dwell on whether or not he responds tonight.

Ding…Ding…Ding

The sound of notifications on your phone wakes you, squinting at the bright screen you see Mingyu's left you a few messages and attempted to call you once.

- Thank you, I did sleep well - How did you sleep? - Are you up? Incoming call… - I guess you aren't - Message me when you wake up, please - I made you pancakes for breakfast and some rice and steak for lunch - Please eat before snacking - I'll try and call you again during my lunch break

You can't help but smile at the attentiveness Gyu shows you. Still hanging onto your sleepy state you get up to go and get ready for the day, not before shooting Mingyu a good morning text though.

You turn on the TV as you sit with your pancakes in hand. The morning news goes through the usual, weather, accidents, etc. You don't pay it any mind until the end, shit. Is it Friday already? Suddenly your head is spinning.

Tonight is the night that you and Mingyu had planned on going to the morgue, FUCK, and you haven't even begun to rewrite your suicide note! The stress makes you pace around the room. DING

- Morning! - Glad you slept well - A bit busy atm - I'll call you during lunch, we should talk about tonight.

Of course, Mingyu remembered. Not that you didn't want him to but it bothers you how comfortable you've been, enough to let time slip and the days sneak up on you. You should've been at least a bit on edge about this but in truth you hadn't thought about it much since you and Gyu's talk. Your time since then has been filled with nothing short of romantic drama and complicated feelings, you didn't mind that in the moment but now you realize that there were MUCH more pressing matters that could've used your attention.

You have to drag yourself to get a pen and some pieces of paper slumping down as you begin to think about what you had written in your note. The memories are not at all pleasant. The crying as you slaved away at a piece of paper meant to be your last words to those you loved and cared about. You remember hiccupping as you wrote it, the tears at one point clouding your vision to the point of no longer being able to see the paper clearly. You're half sure that the messy blotches smeared the ink of the sentences meant for your family but as you recall all of this you find it hard to recapture those feelings. You don't feel that despair anymore, not since you've been reawakened. Not since meeting Mingyu. Not since his proposal. None of the despair followed.

Even still, the words come to you, albeit not exactly in the same way they were in your original note, but this is meant to be a somewhat edited version anyway.

As you finish with you're piece you start to have thoughts of your old life. You still can't will a majority of the memories of that lifetime to come back to you but a wave of sudden sadness hits as you think about who you were and who you knew back then.

The memories of your few friends and the family that you kept contact with feel more like a distant mirage, like a movie you saw years ago and remember parts of. Their faces are obscured by the veil of life and death. You wonder if any of them would show up for your viewing. For a moment you entertain the thought of going yourself, seeing those people dressed in black, and attempting to remember what was. But you shun the idea as quick as it comes; No one can know that you're alive. More than causing complications within yourself, it would cause utter chaos at Mingyu's doorstep and that is definitely not what you want to happen.

Lunch rolls around and you hear a ringtone that, in time, you will become all too familiar with. Mingyu's caller ID lights up your screen to Facetime him. You answer as you pull out your food from the microwave and set up your place at the coffee table, simulating how you and Gyu usually eat meals.

"Y/n! Good afternoon!" "Hey, Gyu! How has your day been?" "Busy. Our Tech, Chan, misplaced things in the prep room. Thank goodness I caught it before I started using the embalming machine-" Gyu continues to tell you about all the morbid details of his latest client and you're amazed that a topic like this comes to both of you naturally and without discomfort, I guess there is some common ground in death that both of you tread on.

Towards the end of Gyu's lunch break, you both breach the meat of what you were supposed to talk about. "So tonight…" "Yeah, I've actually already prepared my letter, thankfully I didn't use any fancy stationery so it was quite easy-" "Oh! You did that already?" "Yeah, there wasn't much else to think about or do" "I see… Sorry, I should've been there." "What? No-" "It must've been hard to relive writing that, y/n…" "I- It was. But trust me! Having you here might've made the process much more emotional." "Yeah, but at least I would've been there to wipe your tears…" He says it under his breath but the flush that creeps up tells him that you heard him loud and clear, "But thank you for doing it in advance. Gives us some more time to decide how to break in-" "Don't call it breaking in!" "That's what we called it last time!" he laughs as you do, "Okay- Not breaking in but still not exactly doing what we're supposed to, I don't know what you would call it." "We're just going to the morgue to fix some things… It's not bad is it, Gyu?" "Bad? How do you mean?" "I mean- I don't know- It feels like we're doing something illegal but it's my note? And it's my body? I don't know…" "Listen, y/n. I don't think there's any laws about a person changing their own will and testament. If anything I'm probably the one in heaps of trouble here. I tampered with a dead body, am technically breaking and entering, and under some circumstances, some could say I stole you-" "Stole me?!" "I'm just saying! The story from an outsider's perspective could sound more criminal than romantic." "People have no problem with Frankenstein-" "Right… You're like my own little monster and I'm Victor-" "Watch it…" "Sorry sorry" you both giggle at the mention. "You think our story is romantic?" "Well- It's supposed to be. The handsome mortician falls in love with one of his clients? Sounds straight out of a messed up romance novel." You give an amused hum in response.

"But getting back to what we were talking about-" "Right." "We'll go to the morgue around 9-ish?" "What if they ask why you're there that late?" "Hmm I don't know, I'll tell them it's a rush job for a client's family?" "Okay, then what are you telling them you're there for again?" "Remember? I'll tell them I need to pick up a client's possessions." "Right right- Is that how that works?" "Not at all, usually you guys come with a bag of your things or your family brings clothes and stuff to put you in." "Woahhh grouping me in with the corpses now?" "No- Wait- I didn't-" You laugh as he facepalms and shakes his head. "Okay okay, then while you're doing all of that, I'm just waiting?" "Yep! Keeping the car warm and running for a quick getaway-" "This is not some sort of heist, Gyu…" "It sounds like one a bit… But! As long as the guard doesn't know me and doesn't want to bother me with chit-chat then we should be smooth sailing~" You nod your head in response.

The call ends abruptly as someone knocks on Gyu's car window to tell him to get inside. He apologizes profusely over text-

- So srry!!! - New client - I'll see you whne I get home!

He begins to type "I love…" but stops himself and immediately erases it.

Don't be afraid to text me, please

You smile as the messages roll in, sending him a thumbs-up emoji in response you settle back into the quiet of the house.

When Mingyu gets home you're resting, mindlessly flicking through different channels.

You hear the door open and jump to your feet to meet him at the entrance. Your jaw almost dropped at the sight of him, you've gotten somewhat used to seeing this handsome man around you, but as he opened the door the sunlight crept through lighting him from the back you could almost believe he was some sort of angel.

"Something catch your eye?", he smiles as he catches you staring. "Hmm? No- Welcome home~", as he takes off his shoes you open your arms. It shouldn't be too out of place to hug him, right? His smile grows ever brighter as he enters your arms, a heavy sigh leaving him and he relaxes into you. He needed this. The stress of the day, the plans, the awkwardness, all of it relieved the moment you initiated something. He would say his mind is clouded by you but that just doesn't sum it up, it's more like you clear the entire sky in his mind, and he feels it as you hug him.

Night comes all too fast today and dinner is rushed as you both nervously banter till it's time to leave. You didn't have to be punctual but the clock did feel like some sort of time bomb as you counted down the minutes in the car. You can nearly hear your own heartbeat in your ears as you drive.

Mingyu turns on the radio to relieve some amount of tension, "It'll be fine.", you think he's talking to you but his heart is beating just as fast, the adrenaline reminding him of the night he woke you, save for the romantic parts. You rest your hand on his knee for some assurance as you enter the parking lot.

"Here's the note, Gyu. Be careful, please. Run back to the car if you have to." Your words are the only thing that lessens the anxiety rising in him. "Okay. Sit pretty for me? Don't freak out, the hard part is done for you. We'll get a late-night snack after this okay?" You nod, both of your eyes wide with a rush that only each other's words can seem to calm. Like a hawk, you watch as Mingyu goes up to the door.

The morgue is located on the first floor of the hospital. Thankfully Mingyu can avoid worming his way through the halls of the entire facility as there is a special exit door made to transport bodies as well as let through any personnel that works in this department. Gathering his courage with a few deep breaths he firmly knocks.

A young man meets his eyes as he opens the door. "May I help you?", relief comes over him as he doesn't recognize the boy, should make all of this much easier, he thinks.

"Yes, hi. I'm Kim Mingyu. The local mortician." He shows the kid his I.D. as proof. "I came by to pick up some things left behind from a current client of mine." "I'm sorry. I don't think I'm allow-" He begins to shut the door but Mingyu holds it open with his arm.

"I know Joshua. The- umm- coroner. I know the head coroner. He said I could come by and pick it up." The boy looks tentatively. "How do I know I can trust you?" "Haha like someone would want to steal corpses or something ha-" He stares back at Mingyu with an unamused and slightly frightened look, "Sorry, bad joke. You should be able to look at some of the papers-" He points past the boy to the file holder on the wall, "It should say transporting to the mortuary and under the care of Mortician Kim Mingyu, or something like that."

The boy turns around, stealing occasional glances back at Mingyu to make sure he doesn't get through, he gives him a compliant smile and nods in return. It takes the boy a minute as he goes through several files before returning. "Okay. Sorry about that." "All good, all good. May I?" "Oh yes! Come in."

You watch the back and forth, a part of you wishing you had told Gyu to call you on his phone while this went down, just in case. The guard opens the door further and after what feels like an eternity you see Gyu disappear into the morgue.

Now in the clear Mingyu goes about the morgue without worry. He's scanning rooms left and right for a box of patient belongings, maybe a shelf dedicated to it, just looking anywhere he thinks your note could possibly be.

He enters the fridge room, a room lined with huge refrigerators, carefully temperature kept to store bodies until they are transported to him or another funeral home. The thought crosses his mind that maybe they have a special containment fridge or something similar for things used to identify the cause of death. He begins to carefully read the taped labels of each fridge, quickly moving on if he doesn't find what he's looking for.

In his ministrations, he isn't able to hear as a set of footsteps walks through the halls nor does he hear the opening of the door.

"Mingyu?" Startled he straightens up and backs away from the fridge, "Wonwoo- What? What are you doing-" "I can ask you the same thing…" They both look at each other, Mingyu like a deer caught in headlights and Wonwoo with utter confusion befalling him. The expression on Mingyu's face proves that he's here with some sort of motive but before Wonwoo's able to ask any questions a screaming pierces through the air.

"HELP SOMEONE!! HELP!"

They both rush out to find the security guard kneeling on the ground in front of the door, holding it wide open, completely distraught as he cradles your unconscious body in his arms.

A/N: Hello, my loves! I had a hard time writing this one, usually scenes come to me rather easily but whewww not with this one. And this is barely edited ;-; Anyways, please comment and reblog if you liked this part! It really does encourage me to continue with this series. And my inbox is open if you have any private comments or just wanna chat! Have a good weekend babes!

TAGLIST (open): @jjin-kun @mydolle-dd

[thefishermansharbor]

Hear me out pook M6 with a reader who specializes in earth magic think flowers plants etc RAAAH‼️‼️‼️

The M6 with an S/O who specializes in plant-based magic!

The arcana x GN!Reader!Headcanons

Muriel the outsider:

In all honesty, Muriel will be the most appreciative of your gift out of everyone. He loves the forest, and he loves you. Now those two things combined. He’s overjoyed!

He decides that your magic would be useful, and invites you on his weekly trips around the forest. It’s actually quite cute, he makes it into a romantic hike for the two of you. 

If you decide that you don’t want to take care of the forest with him, or that it’s too strenuous for you, he’ll respect your boundaries and admire your magic from afar instead. 

He does ask you for help on certain things, but he’s always considerate of how it will affect you, and if it’s a want or a need. 

Muriel will also openly admit to you how impressed he is of your skill. If you’re feeling particularly insecure that day, or he just feels like complimenting you, that’s his go - to for compliments. 

Asra Alnazar:

At first, he’s unsure of how to react. He tries to figure out how it works in comparison to his own magic, so that way he can help teach you effectively. 

He also, much like Muriel, does take a minute to admire your magic every now and again. As a fellow magician, he understands how hard magic is to do - and yet you make it look so beautiful and simple, he really is in awe of not only of how effortlessly you do it, but how pleasing you make it look.

He won’t ask you to do anything. He doesn’t want to strain you, but he wants you to know that he admires it - so he’ll give you pointers on your magic but also compliment it.

As a fellow magician, he’d also like to learn some of your plant - based tricks. How to make a flower grow, or how to get a vine to contort to another shape, so he’ll ask you how you manage to do certain things. 

He’s very proud of you, he says it every now and again but it’s hard to explain how proud he is of you and your unique magical skills. 

Nadia Satrinava:

She finds it intriguing. She wants to know how exactly it works. It’s more of a study than admire thing. 

It surprised her at first. She didn’t know much about any magic, let alone that there were specific types that could mean and do different things for different people. She finds it a bit confusing, but once she gets the hand of it - she asks to study it. 

She loves watching you work your magic. She thinks less of the magic, and more of you. There’s nothing she respects more than hard work, and watching you perform your talents is something she’ll never get sick off. 

She has too much self - respect to ask you for a demonstration out right, but it crosses her mind every now and again and she uses repetition as a soft suggestion to try and get you to do it. 

Nadia also tries to think of how your talent would benefit her. She’s not too shy to ask you for favors, but like Muriel, she stays within reason and doesn’t want to make you overwhelmed or uncomfortable with the amount of tasks she asks of you.

Portia Devorak: 

She finds it so cool! She’s literally sweating when she first sees it, first of all - it’s so hot to her to see you work, second of all, your work is so majestic and amazing to her! Bonus points if you give her a flower that your magic made, she’ll literally swoon over you. 

She daydreams about doing it to. She may be the slightest bit jealous of your tricks, but she doesn’t let it get in the way of praising you. She does really wish she could do it too, just thinking of all the pranks and schemes she could cook up with magic like that. 

Portia is one of the very few who isn’t expecting or asking you to do something for them with the magic. She’s completely relaxed about you doing in your own time, and doesn’t ask or pressure you to do it when she wants you to. 

Whenever she talks to anyone about you ( which is often ) she’s sure to mention it. She wants everyone to know just how awesome you are, and just how lucky she is. She’s not shy about praising you around other people. 

She gets curious - and asks lots of questions about what you can do with the magic, if there’s any cool things you can make, change, or do. She won’t make you show her, but it’s one of the things she’s most curious about. 

Lucio Morgasson:

Incorporates it into his flirting and pick - up lines. It’s really cheesy, but it’s also very sweet and shows that he puts at least some effort into flirting and doesn’t just re-use whatever he told to his last partner. 

He loves the feeling of you showing off to him, it makes his chest puff up with pride whenever you demonstrate to him. It makes him feel special, and like you care a lot about him. He really likes it. 

Whenever he gets bored of doing paperwork and you’re in the room, he’ll ask you to show him a trick or do something in the background to just give him some white noise and something to focus on while he works. 

He also uses your magic as a party trick - Lucio’s known to be a wild party animal, and he’s practically beaming whenever you agree to show off your skills to kick the party up a notch. 

A lot like Portia, he wishes to do the same, but he’s too proud to admit it to you or ask for lessons and just lets that jealousy sit in his mind. Sometimes when he’s on his own, he waves his hands around and pretends that he’s casting your magic. 

Julian Devorak:

His first reaction is that it’s incredible. But later on, he starts to connect it to his work and wonder if there’s anyway it could help him in his medicinal studies. There’s been plenty of plant based cures in the past, couldn’t there be more now? 

He won’t outright ask you, but he takes a little notebook and scribbles notes in his unintelligible handwriting whenever he sees you do your magic. 

He does keep it in mind, and will get you plant - based gifts and knick-knacks because he knows that you’ll know what to do with them. 

Whenever he thinks of you, he pictures you in nature because of your magic. If you ask him what he sees when he thinks of you, he’ll say something along the lines of “ you looking perfect in a field of tulips.” 

He has certain theories about connecting your work to medicines, but he feels a bit guilty that all he can think of when it comes to your talent is how to connect it to his work, and thus doesn’t bring it up to you too often.

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Thanks for the request! I hope this is what you wanted, but it's un-revised so there may be some mistakes. If there is, just let me know. Have a great day & summer and request again any time.

[pastanest]

Daryl Dixon x she/her!reader

A/N: set in Alexandria, no spoilers of events, just one character who lives there

For Your Hand

From the moment Daryl strolled into Alexandria with one hand holding yours and the other holding a dead opossum, he had made a statement, and everyone in Alexandria had understood it loud and clear. In truth, Daryl had not thought much about the deeper meaning behind his statement, he simply wanted the crowd of strangers to understand that you were under his protection and he was very capable of handling pests. In his own way, the gesture was very sweet and because you knew him so well, you took it as a compliment. 

Anyone that had looked at you and seen you as an easy target or - god forbid - available, had quickly been set on the right path upon seeing the large hand that held yours and the way in which you partially hid yourself behind what you had accepted to be your guardian angel while others saw an unpredictable, animalistic, territorial wild-man, and you didn’t mind that description, either. There was only one person in the crowd of strangers that had been stupid enough to misinterpret the display and, instead of taking the “back off” message and following suit, took it as a personal challenge.

Deanna’s eldest son, Spencer, was the furthest thing from your type you could have conjured up if you were to try. Clean cut, smooth talking, clearly views himself as charming; the perfect salesman in a time where nothing would ever be sold again. But, you were never one to be impolite without good reason, which was something Daryl admired about you from day one. Being naturally standoffish, he could not understand the warmth you immediately offered every person you met, including him, until a person gave you a reason to treat them differently. As ridiculous as you thought Spencer’s attempts at wooing you were, he had not overstepped a boundary or acted inappropriately. He remained respectful and would accept your refusals at every turn, but would approach you again in no time from a different angle, trying out some new sales pitch on you. It became an inside joke within your group, everyone laughing and rolling their eyes when they saw Spencer approach you, and because you had made it clear to Daryl you had no interest in the guy and he trusted you wholeheartedly, he saw the humor in it, too.

That was, until yesterday, when you went to Daryl nervously to tell him that the previous night, after Daryl had left to check the traps he’d set beyond the walls - not wanting to rely on the community’s food just yet - and Spencer took it upon himself to knock at your door. It was very late by the time your soulmate and protector had left your home, meaning it was no coincidence that Spencer was around when he left; he had been waiting for Daryl to go before he made his move. While the conversation he approached you with was nothing out of the ordinary for Spencer, you were made uncomfortable by the way in which he had snuck around Daryl. It meant he understood that your boyfriend would not approve of his intentions, and that raised alarm bells for you.

Listening intently to your explanation, Daryl nodded only once, scowl already darting around Alexandria until it landed on the idiot that had dared make you feel uncomfortable. Fixing his icy glare on him, Daryl finally answered you.

“I’ll deal with ‘im.”

He considers running over and tackling the guy to the ground then and there, but decides against it in favor of a better plan, the thought of which leaves a smirk curling at the corner of his mouth for the rest of the day.

Daryl makes the executive decision to stick to you like glue for the rest of the evening. While he is not always at your side, he is never more than a few feet away, smoking a cigarette while you chat to someone else, helping you with your daily tasks, leading you over to his bike and having you sit on it while he works on it for absolutely no reason, solely to relish in the disdainful expression he catches on Spencer’s face from the corner of his eye when he stands up and you swoon over your greased up wildman. He ensures that, for the duration of the day, Spencer has no opportunity whatsoever to get you alone, for your sense of safety and his own personal enjoyment. 

Much like the previous night, Daryl spends the evening with you in the house you share, the two of you enjoying each other’s company, cooking up what he retrieved from his traps the night before, laughing and joking around like a married couple in the suburbs. As ironic as that description is, considering the state of the world and Daryl’s general opposition to that kind of dream, he cannot deny that when that kind of dream involves you, it brings the softest smile to his face and the lightest dusting of pink to his cheeks. 

Around the same time as the previous night, Daryl takes his leave, kissing you goodbye at the door and swinging his crossbow over his shoulder before heading for the gate. This time, though, he intends to trap a different kind of pest. Instead of going to the gate, he turns left down a different street, then left again down another, then left one final time, between some houses that bring him right back to yours. There, he finds Spencer jogging up your porch steps with some flowers clasped in his hands. Daryl scoffs, approaching silently to stand at the bottom of the steps and right as Spencer lifts his hand to knock at your door, his voice cuts into the silence of the night.

“The hell you doin’?” His voice is quiet and gruff as ever, but the way Spencer’s stance stiffens tells Daryl he has already succeeded in making the younger man shit himself where he stands.

Clearing his throat, he turns to face Daryl, trying lamely to hide the flowers behind his back. “Daryl! Hey!”

Taking a drag of his cigarette, Daryl tips his nose, gesturing to the flowers. “Those for (Y/N)?”

Accepting that he has been caught in the act, Spencer can only nod.

Daryl nods back at him. “She don’ like ‘em, she likes pink ones best.”

Spencer’s eyes widen. “O-Oh…”

Dropping his cigarette on the ground, Daryl puts it out with a single drag of his shoe. “Course, ya’d know that if ya cared enough t’ ask ‘er, but ya dont. Every time ya talk to ‘er, yer tryna persuade ‘er that yer her dream guy, but ya know nothin’ about ‘er.”

Spencer frowns at this. “Hey, man, I never meant to-”

Daryl waves him off. “Save it, I’ve known what you were doin’ since the firs’ time I saw you lookin’ at ‘er.”

Spencer’s frown intensifies. “You knew and never tried to stop me? Isn’t she supposed to be yours?”

Daryl smirks at the idiot’s poor attempt to get under his skin. “Glad ya know that, at least. Never stopped ya ‘cause (Y/N) never asked me to, she didn’t wanna be impolite an’ as long as you stayed respectful, I would’ve had no problem laughin’ at yer attempts to get ‘er. Ya crossed the line las’ night, so ‘m stoppin’ you now.”

Spencer sighs, feigning defeat as he hangs his head and walks slowly down the steps, not meeting Daryl’s scowl as he passes him. “I never meant to make her uncomfortable…You win, man.”

At that, Daryl scoffs again. “She ain’t no damn prize to be won, asshole.” Then it’s his turn to jog up the steps and stand at your door, intending to guard it until Spencer is out of sight. 

Unfortunately, Spencer’s ego just won’t let him leave without taking one last jab. Looking over his shoulder from down the street, he calls out.

“I hope someday (Y/N) realizes what’s good for her and chooses someone that will actually fight for her!”

For a moment, there is silence, because Daryl allows it. He watches the silence lull Spencer into a false sense of security, waits for the victorious smirk to appear on his face, and then lets that smirk disappear at the sound of a crossbow falling against your porch. 

The steps towards Spencer are silent, but he turns to face the fast approaching wildman with an expression of a deer in headlights. Once only a few feet separates them, Daryl stops. 

“Ya think I won’t fight for ‘er?”

Spencer clears his throat. “W-Well, I just meant that you haven’t-”

Daryl shrugs, interrupting him. “C’mon then, gimme yer best shot.”

Spencer’s jaw drops. “Wh-What?!”

Daryl crosses his arms over his chest. “C’mon, man, you wanna fight for ‘er hand or whatever, go for it. I got all night.”

The sound of your front door opening pulls Daryl from his current conversation immediately. As soon as his eyes land on the sight of you, stepping out onto your porch, his scowl softens into the loving smile that only you can bring him.

“Daryl? Is everything alright?” You call out to him, your concern for what is unfolding between the two men obvious by your tone.

“Everythin’s fine, almos’ done here!” Daryl calls back to you. 

Seeing your expression relax makes his heart sing, even from afar, but it doesn’t last long. A look of alarm flashes across your face and you’re quick to point behind him. 

“DARYL! LOOK OUT!”

Scowling, Daryl turns around just in time to duck out of the way of Spencer as he lunges for him, sending him stumbling. The moment Spencer is steady on his feet again, Daryl closes the space between them with a swift right hook to his jaw, Spencer landing on the ground with a thud. Standing over him, Daryl shakes his head.

“If ya wan’ed me t’ fight for ‘er, only had t’ ask.”

With that, he steps over Spencer as he sputters blood onto the gray street and rolls onto his back, staring up at the night sky in total defeat. Meanwhile, Daryl strolls over to you so casually, as though he hasn’t just made the most chivalrous and impressive display for your hand you have ever seen. Playing along, you hold your hand out to him and as he ascends the porch steps, he takes hold of it and gently kisses your knuckles, the two of you chuckling at the ridiculousness of it all, but both feeling heat rising in your faces at the intensity of your feelings towards each other, following such a gesture.

Hand still in his, you tug him as close to you as you can bring him and lean up to place a chaste kiss on his lips. You can both feel Spencer’s eyes on you as you do, bringing amused smiles to your faces, but a chaste kiss is the most PDA either of you want to give him the satisfaction of showing off. Leaning down to pick his crossbow back up, Daryl swings it over his shoulder, and you are quick to instinctively brush his hair from his face as you admire him in all his glory.

“My knight in shining armor.”

—————

taglist:

@ruinedbythehobbit @iamburdened @evilbabyelf @of-storms-and-sadness @crossbowking @spidergirla5 @jodiereedus22 @thanossexual @captain-shannon-becker @cordialgargoyle @romanoffs-bitch @daryldixonandfrogs @just-always-tired @pillowjj @the-musical-doodle @likeablevillain @irrelevantyettopicalusername @notquitecannon @alyisdead @polkadottedpillowcase @twdeadfanfic @wishingtobeforeveryoung1994 @sigynlokiem @courtnytrash04 @thatwrestlingfan91 @buttsology @prettylittleblog13 @milariskanavasi @whatanicepanohthatsjustme @your-new-mom @daryls-angell @lilzebub @amaroho @bakedcrispss @yes-sir-hotchner @wasted-years @kpopandharry @madshelily @datidixon @dumandbass @savageneversaw

[tenjikufag]

Different.

Osamu Dazai x Male Reader

-this one took awhile! Sorry! Not sure if this is what you thought of but I hope you like it anyways.

-hurt/comfort(?), angst, toxic attachments, sui/ideation, manipulation, drabble (not a concise oneshot)

What happens when Oda survives, therefore keeping Dazai confined in the claws of the port mafia and held within the endless roulette of that life?

-He’s possessive. Protective, he will not allow you any leeway when he has told you something with concern for your safety.

When he thought Oda was going to die, he knew he would leave and that he would take you with him whether you liked it or not- in this frame of mind, he would not grown to know better than to force you into things.

Force you into this dynamic with him, he desperately needed you to live. For as long as he was stuck here, so were you. Of course, his depression and ideation never went away but it was far more volatile and pointed towards others, not towards the harm of himself.

“If you go, I’ll do it in your bedroom so you know the repercussions.”

“Do you really want me to confine you? I have no problem with that, if it means you’re safe.”

Such phrases rang in your ears like a persistent alarm, trying to wake you from the ‘insanity’ he had deemed you had. Why would you want to subject yourself to a danger that would take you away from him?

He thought this was a selfless act of his, holding you close with an iron grip whenever you were assigned missions without him.

You did have a job to do, you weren’t a random port mafia member- you were a “big dog”, had your own team to work with and look over.

Dazai had other things to do, but he became messy with his work. With haste, he would finish his own missions and leave ends not yet tied, strings loose for the others to clean up after him.

Just to get back to you.

—

“You can’t keep treating him like this. It’s selfish Osamu, it’s not fair to him.”

Odas voice cracked, the bitter liquid and feeling of unease around his friend burned at the end of his tongue and eased in his throat.

Dazai has not been a good friend ever since, not that he was the greatest to begin with but.. he distanced himself from Oda and Ango which is odd, but he deemed them too easy to fall from his grasp. But he knew you would be in an arms reach at all times, emotionally and physically he knew he could prevent you from meeting any similar fate to his friends..

“How is it selfish to keep my partner safe?”

Ango only glanced at Oda, uncomfortable with the nonchalant tone that their friend had gained.. Dazai wasn’t the most stable or even sensible person to begin with but this pushed boundaries that they had yet to see from him.. and they’d seen everything. They knew everything. They knew him.

The bar door opened, a faint jingle from the door handles bell notifying all patrons of a new person.

You came into view, warmly greeting your friends and taking the empty seat beside Oda, putting him in between you and your partner. Ango, not wanting to be apart of this quickly paid his tab and apologized to you for having to leave..

Dazai watched intently as you ordered your drink, and watched with hawk-like eyes as the bartender poured it, making sure there was nothing slipped into it or anything wrong with the drink.

“Y/n, come sit over here.”

Ducking over Odas shoulder to hear Dazai better, you nodded and switched seats.

Dazai stood up, letting you take his seat only to rest himself in your lap.. you huffed and tried to push him off but he didn’t budge.

Oda was no stranger to his friends outwards affection towards you but this was a bit odd..

“Oda, how’s the wound healing?”

You poked his chest, he sighed and pushed your hand away.

“It’s fine, not as bad of a scar as I expected..”

Humming, you took a sip from your drink and continued conversing with your older friend, Dazai only periodically chiming in.

He listened to the way your heart beat in your chest, how you breathed, how your skin became flush with each passing drink. He knew your blood was flowing, your heart was pumping, he knew you were here.

You were safe.

You were his.

“Osamu, we should get going. You look tired.”

His visible eye drooped, weighed with the washed anxiety of you not being present. The male nodded, Oda mentioned staying for another drink before heading out himself, leaving to two of you to go on your way.

—

“You were late.”

His grip tightened on your arm, making you wince. He laid beside you on the couch, eyes widening at your sound of pain.. quickly he stripped you of your shirt and noticed a large wound on your arm..

“It’s nothing-“

“Don’t you tell me it’s nothing. You were late, who did this? Where were you? Why did this happen? Who sent you to do that?!”

Dazai shook in fear, it was truly nothing but a flesh wound and would heal on its own without intervention but for someone to dare wound you without any form or repercussions that he would know about?

It was unacceptable.

“What would I do if you didn’t come back?! You can’t do this to me!”

He cried as if it was a life threatening wound, collapsing ontop of you- shaking in fear with your arms wrapped around him.

“Calm down. I’m fine. I’m here, I made it back.. you made me promise, right?”

Nervously, you laughed at your partner.. you didn’t want to deal with being at the end of his breakdowns, this is why you hid these things from him.

You’d become secretive as a defence for not only his sanity but your own.

You had to hide a lot from him since the incident. It was no longer a relationship to escape from that part of your world but instead a direct extension because of how he’s changed.

There would never not be blood on his hands when it came to you. He’s murdered many in cold blood for you, whether you knew about it or not.

He was going to keep you from any sickly dead fate, it was his purpose.

Until he decided he had enough, then he’d decide your fate together.

[chaotic-archaeologist]

got a question for ya regarding sex and online safety.

Background; I am an adulty adult. I have been able to and have voted in more than 3 elections. [I know you take interactions with minors seriously]. I am also ace and autistic. as a result I have never felt the urge to date and I normally don't mind having friends close by.

However, I also just moved for the 4th time since 2019 and would like to meet people.

So I downloaded Grindr. already got my first dickpic lol. I have also been chatting with a fellow who I like and would like to be friends with and I also wouldn't mind exploring my kinks with people... but I have never had to worry about safe online sexy stuff before so I don't know the basics beyond normal internet safety.

What do I do‽‽‽

Okay first, thanks for clarifying the adulty part. This is an awesome question, and here's the advice/steps that I personally follow for situations like this.

Have your first meeting in a public place. Go for coffee or ice cream or lunch or dinner or whatever. But don't meet them alone. This way, if you get uncomfortable with anything that's happening, they're much less likely to continue with that behavior after you attempt to extricate yourself.

Make sure there are no expectations. Plan not to have sex on the first date/meet up. Grindr often tends to ignore this rule since it's very hookup centric, but you're absolutely within your rights to insist on taking things as slowly as you want to.

Don't rely on the other person for transportation. If you choose to meet someone, get yourself there and plan to get yourself back. Walk, bike, drive, public transportation, unicycle, it's all good. But there's much less room for pressure if you're not depending on them for a ride home. This segues nicely into my next point:

Do not tell them where you live. At least, not right now. Plenty of people on Grindr are willing to "host" meaning you can come to their place. That's fine for them, but I err on the side of never giving anyone my address until I've had a thorough chance to assess their character and meet them a few times.

Tell someone where you will be. Let someone who cares about you know that you're going out, where you'll be, and what time you expect to return. Establish a time to check in when you're going home/if you choose to extend the meeting. There are also apps like Noonlight that can function similarly.

Be careful about what you consume. If you're going to enjoy and mind alternating substances, be very, very careful. This goes for anything from getting drinks at a bar to any and all of the recreational drugs on the market.

Be prepared for a little bit of awkwardness. Meeting someone in person is often very different than chatting online. If the conversation is awkward or halting, that's okay. Give it a little time (but also don't be afraid to trust your gut if it's telling you something is wrong).

Communicate clearly. If you have any needs—which can range from an allergy, not being able to stand for long periods of time, needing them to speak loudly so you can hear them, safety concerns—the best way to get those met is to be upfront. You don't need to disclose the reason why you need something if it makes you uncomfortable, just state what you need. People worth spending time with will respect that. The same thing goes for your wants.

Use protection. Maybe this isn't applicable for you specifically, but I think it belongs on this list. Condoms. Dental dams. Gloves. Someone on an app telling you they're negative for any number of things is not an actual guarantee they're not lying to you. Not wanting to use protection (not just for anal/vaginal intercourse, but for oral sex as well) is a huge red flag. Decide in advance what your boundaries are and stick to them.

If it sucks, hit da bricks. Fundamentally, you owe this person nothing. There is no consequence for saying "you know what, I'm not feeling this and I'm going to leave." Be as polite as you want to, but put yourself first.

At the end of the day, the only thing you have control over is you. How you react, where you meet this person, what you do—that's what you control. Hopefully any meet ups will be fun and relatively safe, but just in case, set yourself up for success by maintaining what control you can.

From one adult to another, these are all suggestions rather than rules. Many people on Grindr choose not to follow various ones, and that's fine. Take some time to think about what you're comfortable with and make your decisions accordingly.

Also, best practice for someone sending an unsolicited dick pic (if you don't want them) is just to block that person. But sending a return picture like this one is a hilarious option.

-Reid

[yandere-dark-cupid]

I don't know if you do Yandere alphabet, so if you don't just ignore this. But if you do can you do some of RF or Hunter Wally please.

Bun Anon 🍞~

Ok. Coming right up. Also decided to do RF because my boy's birthday just recently passed. So here you go 💕

Warning⚠!⚠: This fic includes unhealthy relationship dynamics, mentions of death, mentions of inhumane experiments, and a yandere. If you are uncomfortable with those concepts, just move along and ignore it.

P.S.A 📢: Do not glamorize nor romantize yanderes!!! It is ok to fantasize about them, but putting them on a pedestal is the last thing you would want to do since they're so harmful. They are walking red flags for a reason.

Yandere RF Wally ABCs...

A- is for... Affection: How does he go about affection and how intense does it get?

Walden isn't an affectionate person by any means. Kind of the opposite. But I can see that he probably wouldn't mind being on the receiving end of it unless he's busy. Then he'll be annoyed. But hey, at least he isn't the type to force you to be affectionate with him and vice versa.

B- is for... Blood: How much blood is he willing to spill for you?

He doesn't mind it and is willing to spill as much blood as he needs to get the desired results. So here is your healthy reminder. Walden works in a murder facility. Hell, he even runs it. So seeing blood and getting involved with it won't phase him. He's desensitized by it. But on another note, there is a likely chance that he might put the offender to good use. Perhaps by turning them into palatable colors or a stepping stone the further the field of science….

C- is for... Cruelty: How does he treat you once they're in his grasp and does he mock you about the predicament you're in?

Look. Walden is many things, but an asshole isn't one of them. Intentionally speaking that is. So he wouldn't make fun of your.. circumstances. He's at least one of the more aware Wallys. So he knows what he's doing is very wrong and he isn't ignorant on the fact that you are not happy in the slightest about being trapped by him and with him. And he doesn't want to make you feel any worse than what you're already feeling by adding lemons to open wounds by mocking you. As for you being in his hold, he'll be firmer with you. But other than that you won't be treated any different than when you were free.

D- is for... Darling: Other than kidnapping, what else would he do against your will other than the former?

Nothing else really, since Walden already has you. Which is already enough. He isn't forceful of you when it comes to personal boundaries. He at least respects you on that front.

E- is for... Exposed: How much will he show his heart to you, how vulnerable will he get with you?

It is no secret to anyone who knows about Walden that this man has a family road trip full of baggage. With that baggage comes very tall and sturdy walls that box his heart. So to say the very least, he's not going to open up to you. It takes time for Walden to let down those walls. Even if you are within his grasp by force, his heart is still boxed up just by lesser but still very strong walls. But don't worry, you'll have plenty of time to break down those walls because as far as him abducting you goes all you will have is time to burn on your hands.

F- is for... Fight: What will he do if you fought back against him?

Walden won't be amused to put it lightly. He'll be irated. Since he doesn't tolerate disobedience in the slightest, especially the rebellious type. But he'll give you some lead way since again he's very much aware that what he's doing is messed up and you are with it your right to fight back. But once he's tired and reaches a certain point, that's when punishments come into play....

G- is for... Game: Is this a game to him? Does he enjoy watching you try and escape him?

No. I've already discussed in previous points that Walden doesn't fuck around, especially after a certain point when his tolerance has run thin. So you trying to escape does not bring him any pleasure. Besides, it's not like you can escape him anyway. Your chances of escape are very low since he has all your needed necessities under lock and key and the Factory is built like a fortress. So really it isn't fun for either of you.

H- is for... Hell: What was you worst moment with him?

The first major punishment you've received from him. Like I said before, once Walden is tired enough and he has no more grace to give he's going to stomp out that defiance right out of you. However, I'm not going to go into too much detail about how he did it since that is reserved for a later point and a potential later fic. Just know one word. Green.

I- is for... Ideals: What future does he want for the both of you.

Walden wants to be your spouse and you his once you're well adjusted and is more willing to sign a marriage certificate. Children are a gray area, especially with his past experiences of being a parent. But he hopes that one day it's as much of a possibility that won't fail just like the last ones. But for now, he's satisfied with having you with him. Besides, he knows that those ideals are very far-fetched in the future.

J- is for... Jealousy: Does he get jealous easily? If so how does he cope?

Listen. Walden isn't a jealous man. A controlling one yes. But a jealous one, no. He knows that he has a lot of traits that many people can appreciate and like. He's handsome, wealthy, and quite brilliant. The only way I can see him getting jealous is by being confronted by someone who is your type while he isn't, that's when he gets jealous. How he deals with that jealousy is usually the default answer. Which isolates you from that person if he hasn't taken you or if that doesn't work force the person that got him jealous in the first place into the large pile of bodies that rots underneath the Factory's working cogs.

K- is for... Kisses: How would he act around you?

Walden won't act to different from how he acted before the abduction. This only difference is that he's oddly more strict with you now that you're under his thumb care. Yet oddly enough, if you haven't been taken by him yet is still under his control he's somewhat more open and almost expressive with you. It's kinda strange and confusing.

L- is for... Love letters: How did he approach you? How did he go about wooing you?

The likely chance is that he met you when you were one of his workers since that's the default answer. But Walden was always cold and professional with you, that was until you began to melt his walls. Which caused him to warm up to you a bit more and cruise off a smoother and slightly more casual dynamic together. As far as wooing go. Once most of that professionalism is chucked into the grinder, he begins to show his interest in subtle ways. In only ways, he knew that you would understand. Like slipping you things he knows you'll enjoy, checking up on you a bit more than usual, etc.

M- is for... Mask: Is his true colors different from the one he shows to others?

Kind of, but not really in a way. His colors are just a bit brighter with you since he's more open with you. This very slightly contrasts with his dullness. But at the end of the day, he's still the cold but blunt Walden with you, he's just brighter with you because he's warmer to you.

N- is for... Naughty: What punishment would he dish out to you when you're acting out of line?

It depends on what offense you've committed. If it's something minor, then the penalty will be minor. Then again I did say that Walden will give you some leniency for a time. So even then he won't punish you often during that time. However, I also said before, that Walden won't take defiance well once he hits the wall. So after a certain point, he combats your defiance with more serious punishments other than taking away the things that keep you occupied. That punishment is, Biochemical warfare to be exact. Since he's a scientist and he's in charge of a secret government facility, finding something nasty to not only keep you more compliant but also knock you back into line won't be to hard. But on the fly chance you did something you can't come back from; like escaping and managing to avoid him for a long time, this can lead to a BAD ENDING all around.

O- if for.. Oppression: How many rights would he take from you?

Your financial freedom and will also dictate your social interacts, once you've earned your socializing privilege when you gain enough of his trust. Other than those two, nothing else.

P- is for... Patience: How much lead way does he give you.

More than what you'd expect from him given his short temper. But that's only for a limited amount of time. Because after the adjustment period, Walden's patience will be reduced by half from when he's taken you. That's if you've been defiant with him that is.

Q- is for... Quit: If you die, leave, or successfully escaped; What is he to do if that happens?

When Walden gets you, do understand he is hanging by a last strand. So if he were to lose you by any means, he's going to snap. And depending on if you are indeed still around and are not boxed up underground when Walden gets to you it won't be nice.

R- is for... Regret: Does he feel remorse for what he's done and would he ever set you free?

I would say yes, but then I thought about it… Yeah, no he's not sorry for what he's done. This Wally has already lost so much, so the minute the opportunity of him being selfish for change he'll take it. Because he's never felt feelings like this before of such magnitude; even with the little past experiences he's had, and once it fully sets in and he likes it… He's decided that he's not going to lose it. So even though he's very aware that what he's doing is messed up, he's gotten to the point were he doesn't care therefore he isn't sorry about what he did. As for setting you free, I've already established that he doesn't want to lose you at all. That includes from his grasp too. But what he would do however is once he trusts you and you're well adjusted in your new life, he'll give you some of your mobility back. But you'll still be on a leash though.

S- Is for... Stigma: What brought about this side from him? Was it his childhood, curiosity, or?

Walden's childhood did play a key part in his development as Yandere, as most of his traumatic and sad past has. But I'm going to say the leading causes of this were his damaged psyche and his track record of losing people he held near and dear to him.

T- is for... Tears: How would he feel about you screaming, crying, and/ or isolating yourself from him?

I don't think Walden would comfort you if you shout and weep about your predicament. He understands that what he's done isn't right in the slightest and is a pretty messed up thing to do. Walden also understands that he isn't the best person when it comes to comforting someone, and that's in a general sense once you take his yandere-ness out of the equation. On top of that, he's very much aware that he's the last person you would want to see during this time never mind seek comfort from. Even as a stoic person and he ultimately isn't remorseful for what he did, that doesn't stop him from feeling some level of sadness upon seeing you very upset. He also can't deny that a subconscious part of himself does not like the thought of causing you any distress and loathes it. So he does the best thing he can do. Leave you to your own devices ( albeit, still under his sharp eye though.. ) to process everything by yourself. Also as far as isolation goes, he wouldn't do anything about it. Sure he'll be annoyed and agitated by this choice sometimes, but he's not going to do anything. Since he knows that you'll come around eventually. Especially when it comes down to your needs being met.

U- is for... Unique: What makes him different from the standard Yandere?

Not much to be honest. The only thing I can think about is that there is a higher chance that Walden won't kidnap you because he has control over most of your assets. By that point he won't see the need to keep you under lock and key. So as long as he has a lot of control over you where you won't get froggy and leap away from him, than he won't fully commit to the kidnapping bit.

V- is for... Vice: What weaknesses you can use to your advantage to escape him?

Walden has very few weaknesses you can exploit to get away from. Especially since he's very powerful. The one weakness I can see you can use to get away from him is a child(ren). But that could work only if you coin it against him first and you know exactly how to do it.

W- is for... Wits end: Would he ever hurt you?

Besides, when it comes down to some of his forms of discipline, Walden won't intentionally. But the only exception to this is when he snaps and falls a BAD ( well really worse ) path, and then his intentions will shift to hurting you.

X- is for... Xoanon: Does he revere you, does he worship the ground you walk on? To what length would he go to win you over?

Walden isn't one of the Wallys that would worship you. But if there is any accomplishment(s) you are proud of, he'll celebrate it with you. Also, there are no lengths he wouldn't go to have you. It's no different from what he does for his job to get whatever results he wants. The only difference is the reasonings behind them. So if he has to pay for a certain thing that you always wanted he will gift it to you; no matter how expensive it is, he will do just that. He has to get rid of a pesky co-worker that won't just leave you be, then they will be given the sudden demotion to test subject. Really the lengths he would go to for you aren't super far off from what he typically does for work, it's just more personal if that makes sense.

Y- is for... Yearning: How long would he ache for you before he snaps?

A fairly long time. Since it would take a while for you to get close to Walden and it would take even longer for him to fall in love with you. I'll give it.. 4 years to be generous.

Z-is for... Zenith: Would he break you?

No. Well, kind of? He would.. crack you if that makes sense. Enough to keep you compliant yet still somewhat yourself.

First post since my return back from shadow realm and it's about my husband 🙂. Other than that I'm pretty proud of it. I am doing Yandere Alphabet now if you're wondering, so feel free to request that if you want. Also, do any of y'all have any anime recommendations because I just cleared out my list, so feel free to send that in my ask box if you have any. But other that that, I hope y'all are having a wonderful day. Until next time My little tainted Angels, see you soon 💜❤💜 ~