#but it always squicks me out when i see someone say he was a GOOD father

[starboundsingularities]

hi i have. so many thoughts on this i hope you don't mind.

before saying anything i will preface this with three things:

i have not played through or seen investigations yet. i have heard a few things about it but for the most part the flashback case does not play a part in this. neither doe the anime, for similar reasons.

i am inherently biased. i see a lot of my great grandmother in manfred von karma's behavior, and my great grandmother was, to my understanding, abusive to me. so i'm very predisposed to saying that manfred von karma was abusive to his children as well, simply due to the parallels

this is in no way meant to be mean to the op, and do not send hate to them or i swear to god i will Get You. from my understanding they asked this not because of their own personal opinion or to prove any point but simply because they wanted to hear other people's opinions on the topic and this was an easy way to do so, as it invites both sharing of a base opinion and of your reasoning.

that being said, he was definitely not a good father. it's a very complex discussion, but i feel very confident in saying he was not a good father in any way.

it's comically easy to say he wasn't a good father figure to miles. his whole reason for taking him in was solely to twist him against everything he had wanted and then ultimately pin the blame on him for his father's death. his entire reason for taking him in was a petty revenge plot, because killing his father wasn't enough for him. that alone means that he couldn't have been a good father, regardless of how well he may or may not have treated miles in the time between the dl-6 incident and turnabout goodbyes.

however, his treatment of franziska is much, much more complex. i don't doubt that he cared for franziska, however i doubt he was a good father figure to her, either. even looking at how she acts, it's clear she has so, so many issues stemming from the standards he pushed onto her. she's unable to accept failure, no doubt due to the standard of perfection she was held to. she seems to see most, if not all others as beneath her in some way, which is likely again due to her upbringing. she was no doubt always being told that as a von karma, she had to have been better than others. even if not directly, simply being told that a von karma had to be perfect would no doubt instill a similar belief. after all, nobody can be better than perfect. i would love nothing more than to go on further, but doing so greatly risks this becoming mere projection. i've spent ample time with my great grandma, who similarly only accepted perfection from me, and it left me with a whole slew of problems. she managed to give me a superiority complex and an inferiority complex at the same time.

however, i don't think that he intended to be a bad father, at least not to franziska. he likely fully believed that he was doing what was best for her, leading her to success and perfection like that which he believed he had achieved. simply leading her to carry on a legacy. and i do truly doubt that he was "comically abusive" or whatever term people are using. no, i do not believe that manfred von karma regularly beat his kids, or did not love them at all, or whatever people are saying. i believe that he truly did care for them in some form, or at the very least cared for franziska. and i do believe that he did nice things for them. i doubt they ever had to be told "no" when asking for something, i'm sure he gave them everything they could want, at least in a material sense. i'm sure he took them out places whenever possible, and i'm sure they enjoyed it. that does not negate bad parenting though.

at risk of projecting more, i would like to briefly discuss my great grandma. she loved me very dearly. she told me such often, and the rest of my family told me they had never seen her as close with anyone as she was with me. she took me out all the time, i went swimming at least once a week in summer, she took me to karaoke often (which is a strangely specific parallel to have), she gave me nearly everything i asked for. she had a big house, we had a lot of toys, a lot of movies, nearly everything i could want. and it was fun. i enjoyed it.

but she mocked me relentlessly for any mistake. i stopped taking singing lessons because i couldn't sing well enough to fit her standards. our relationship ended entirely because i couldn't play a song flawlessly on the piano after a week. when i was sad, or upset, i had to take extra care to make sure she never noticed, or i would be called a crybaby. when i was trying to avoid her, she found me anyways simply to mock me. if i recall correctly, one day i was hiding in the basement because i was upset and she stormed downstairs to tell me i had a fat ass and force me to run on the treadmill. we hadn't even been arguing about it. i told my great grandfather once that i was scared of her, and not to tell her i said that. she found out anyways. i don't even remember what she did. i just know i was more scared after. if i ever told her i didn't know something, she would continue to grill me on it until i cried, then mock me for crying.

she loved me. she thought she had my best interests at heart. but despite all the good times, and despite her attempts at spoiling me, she still traumatized me. and many, or at least all of my friends, would agree that she abused me, even if not physically so.

and i feel that having manfred von karma as a father would be a similar experience. perhaps not the exact same. most details would be different. but i believe the overall feeling would be similar enough.

(the poll is just a decoration i just want to read manfred discourse)

[lipglossanon]

With Devils Inside Me

꒰ ͜͡➸ ꒰ ͜͡➸ ꒰ ͜͡➸ ꒰ ͜͡➸ ꒰ ͜͡➸ ꒰ ͜͡➸ ꒰ ͜͡➸ ꒰ ͜͡➸

Dark Stepdad!Leon S. Kennedy x Virgin fem!reader

For the anon who asked for virgin reader! Leon is very dark in this compared to my others so I hope you like it!! 🫣

Warnings: 18+ minors DNI, dark Leon, stepcest, creeper Leon, mean Leon, dirty talk, unprotected sex, creampie, oral (f receiving), Leon has a dark breeding kink, unwanted pregnancy kink ? not sure how to label it lmao

Not proofread ✌️

Title from Christmas Kids by Roar

part ii

꒰ ͜͡➸ ꒰ ͜͡➸ ꒰ ͜͡➸ ꒰ ͜͡➸ ꒰ ͜͡➸ ꒰ ͜͡➸ ꒰ ͜͡➸ ꒰ ͜͡➸

The new husband your mom acquired while you were gone over the summer is a huge surprise to you. You stayed with your dad over the course of few weeks since he’ll be gone on a business trip during your birthday. So here you are now, standing at the arrival bay in the airport closest to home waiting for your mom. You wave when you see her, but you also notice the tall, muscular man standing directly behind her. 

“Honey!” She smiles and pulls you into a hug, “oh it’s so good to see you again! I have some big news to share.”

You smile confusedly as she grabs the man’s hand. Your gaze moves from their clasped hands to his face, feeling a thrill of surprise at his dark blue eyes staring straight at you. 

“This is Leon! We eloped a few weeks ago,” she gushes, showing you the new ring on her finger, “he moved in with us so no worries on having a new room,” she titters, completely missing the heated way his eyes drag down your body.

You smile awkwardly, “Oh uh that’s great, um, congrats mom. A-and it’s nice to meet you, Leon.”

“It’s so nice to finally meet you, sweetheart,” his low voice gives you goosebumps, “your mom talks about you nonstop.”

“Oh, stop, I do not,” she giggles, patting his wide chest, “can you grab her bags, Leon?”

Your mom links your arms together as Leon brushes past you to grab your luggage. You catch a whiff of his cologne then your mom is tugging you along, chattering about her summer and why she wanted to keep her new marriage a surprise for you. 

“I hope you had fun with your dad, honey,” she sighs happily, “I know how much you miss him.”

You smile softly, “Yeah, we had a great time. He said when he gets back from this trip that I can come stay for a while again.”

“Oh that’ll be nice,” your mom coos, patting your cheek. 

She leans in a little closer, “I know it’s not the same, but Leon’s around now so—“

“Mom,” you cringe a little, “I don’t even know him that well and—“

“But you will,” she states firmly, “all I’m saying is he’s so excited to have a daughter in his life. He said he’s always wanted someone to take care of.”

Your eyes cut back behind you to see Leon scanning the airport as you three walk out; feeling your gaze on him, his eyes snap over to you. He tilts his head and gives you a strange smile. Hurriedly, you drop his intense gaze and face the airport exit. You feel anxiousness fizzing in your chest at his behavior.

“C’mon, once we get home and you get settled, you’ll see how nice it can be.”

After that first day back home, you make sure to avoid being with Leon—alone or otherwise. His vibes are off as your friends would say. He’s always staring at you, no matter what you’re doing. You’ve subtly brought it up to your mom, not wanting to make things weird cause Leon hasn’t actually said or done anything to you. Well, outside the niceties of things like ‘how was your day?’ or ‘dinner’s ready’. He’s perfectly normal, but something about him just squicks you out.

Unfortunately, you can’t avoid him forever. Your mom rarely travels for work, but there was an emergency at a satellite branch in the next state and so she packed up her bags, kissed you on the cheek, and bid Leon goodbye at the door with a hug and a kiss. The door closing felt like the lid on a coffin snapping shut. You felt small and alone.

Leon watches your mom pull out of the drive and then turns to face you, “Guess it’s just us, huh sweetheart.”

You laugh nervously, “Guess so.”

His unnerving blue eyes just watch you with that strange smile hovering over his mouth. 

“Well, I’ll go get started on dinner. I’ll call you when it’s finished,” he walks past you to the kitchen, brushing his fingers along your arm, “don’t be late, sweetheart.”

You hold your breath until he’s out of sight and then let it go in a shudder. Walking over into the living room, you curl up on the couch and put some mindless show on the tv. You scroll through your phone, browsing through your friend’s updates and random news until the hair on the back of your neck raises. You jerkily turn your head to look behind you and see Leon leaning in the doorframe, staring—always staring—at you.

“Was just about to let you know dinner’s ready,” he smiles crookedly, eyes empty, “wanna go wash up while I set the table?”

“S-sure,” you clear your throat and shakily stand on your legs, “I’ll be there in sec.”

He hums and turns back into the kitchen leaving you to anxiously make your way to the bathroom to wash your hands. You gaze into the mirror and see your wide eyes peering back, anxiousness written all over your features. You pat some cold water on our cheeks and dry them off. Cutting off the light, you head back over to the dining room.

You frown as you see your normal seat is empty; Leon has you sitting beside him, where your mom would usually be. You walk over to the seating arrangement and jump when Leon brushes your arm.

“Here,” he murmurs next to your ear as he pulls the seat out for you.

“Uh, t-thanks,” your voice shakes as you sit down.

His fingertips graze the back of your neck as he situates your chair. You shiver and lean forward, pretending to fiddle with your glass. Glancing from the corner of your eye, you see a smirk flicker over Leon’s face before he schools his expression. You can feel your heart in your throat.

“I hope we can get along the few days your mom will be gone, sweetheart,” he speaks, his voice low as he sits down next to you.

You give him a weak smile, “I-I’m sure we will.”

He hums noncommittally, ignoring the food on his plate to take the hand you have closest to him.

“You’re trembling, pretty girl, you feeling okay?” His voice is all rough concern but his eyes are wicked.

You softly try to tug your hand back, but he has it in a firm grip.

“Oh uh, yeah, I-I haven’t been f-feeling too well. Think I got a headache,” you wince a little as he squeezes your fingers, “maybe I should go lay down or something.”

You watch with sick fascination as you see his demeanor shift from lax to alert. His eyes are dark and his lips twitch into a smile.

“I think that would be best, sweetheart. C’mon let me take you to bed.”

You stand up quickly, nearly tripping over your chair, “Ahh, no I’m fine really.”

You laugh but it sounds a little manic even to your ears, “I uh I’ll be just fine, but thanks.”

He frowns at you and stands from his chair too. You feel cornered but try your absolute best not to show it. 

“I really think I should help you, sweetheart,” he looks at you with hungry eyes, “you know, I’ve always wanted a babygirl to take care of.”

“O-oh? Mom m-mentioned you always wanting t-to have a d-daughter to take care of,” you smile shakily, swallowing at the way he’s tracking your every move.

The smile is slow to overtake his features, but it makes your heart rabbit in your chest.

“She did? Well, I did say babygirl. I guess you could infer daughter from that,” he chuckles, no mirth in the sound, “always wanted a pretty girl of my own, a sweet babygirl who just needs daddy to take care of her.”

You can’t hold back the gasp as you push away from the table and back into the living room, not taking your eyes off of Leon.

“Aw, don’t be that way sweetheart,” he coos, slowly stalking forward, “you can’t imagine how lucky I feel at finding your mom; I almost dumped her, but then she springs your picture on me. Such a sweet little thing, but sadly wouldn’t be back til the end of the summer.”

He continues to slowly follow you as you make your way to the front door, afraid if you turn around and run that he’ll grab you.

“So I bid my time til that sweet looking girl comes home. And if I fix it to where I’m more of a permanent figure in her life, all the better,” he smirks, “no offense, sweetheart, but your mom is only a means to an end.”

Your eyes are wide and panicked, darting to the couch you can see where you left your phone not thinking anything of it. 

“Well as much fun as this is, think it’s time to wrap it up,” he pauses and rolls his shoulders back. 

You turn and run for the door, but Leon catches you in next to no time. Wrapping his bulky arms around you, he easily lifts you from the ground. You scream but it’s cut short as he moves one hand to cover your mouth.

“Nuh uh, sweetheart,” he clicks his tongue, “I’m afraid none of that.”

He scents your hair and groans, “So fucking sweet. Now I’m going to ask you something and you better answer me honestly cause it can get very nasty very quick.”

You nod your head, tears leaking from your eyes blurring your vision.

He chuckles, “Good girl, god I knew you’d be perfect. You a virgin, baby? Daddy needs to know how to treat you.”

Sobbing harder, you nod.

You feel his hold tighten around you, “Fuck. I’m just the luckiest daddy in the whole world, huh.”

Your legs kick as you feel yourself hyperventilating. Twisting your head you try to move his hand, nostrils flaring as your breath quickens. 

“Shh, shh, baby, it’s okay,” he soothes you, “I’m going to move my hand but if you try to yell, I’m gonna be very upset.”

Nodding you agree, tears and snot running down your face. He moves his palm away but doesn’t let up on the hold he has on your waist. You breathe in a deep, gasping wheeze trying to calm your racing heart.

“There’s my good girl,” he pets your hair away from your face, “now we’re gonna go upstairs. I’ll put you down once we make it to the bedroom.”

A sob slips past your lips but you don’t do anything to fight his hold as he carries you upstairs to his room—the room he shares with your mom. A whole new slew of tears stream from your eyes, breath hitching on every exhale. He enters the room, shuts and locks the door behind him with an actual lock and key. You feel defeated looking at the heavy ornate lock. 

He walks over to the bed and sets you down on it carefully. He tucks the key away in the nightstand, eyes watching you watch him. 

“Don’t even think about it, sweetheart,” he pats your cheek softly, a hard look in his eyes, “it won’t end well.”

Sniffling, you nod yes.

“Good girl,” he purrs, eyes glinting, “really such a sweet, perfect girl for daddy.”

He slips off his shirt and jeans leaving him bare chested in a pair of briefs. You hate yourself for gawking, but you’ve never seen him in such a state of undress. His abs flex as he shifts his jeans down his thick thighs; you drag your gaze down further and see the outline of his cock filling out his briefs. God he wasn’t even hard and he’s already so big. A sick thrill of arousal pulses in your clit. Flushing, you can’t stop staring at his muscles flexing as he folds his clothes and sets them aside.

“C’mon, baby, let’s lay down to help with that headache,” the low timbre of his voice makes your nipples tighten.

You use your palm to wipe your nose and then dry the tears off of your face, feeling disgust war with your arousal as you lay down with Leon pressed along your side.

He doesn’t do anything more than hold you, running his fingertips over the bridge of your nose, across your cheekbones, then lightly across your lips. After a few minutes, your muscles start to relax in his hold, the heat from his body seeping into your thin shirt and shorts. 

He tugs you closer until you’re tucking your face under his chin. His hands now running up and down your back, broad palms soothing you. 

Without consciously realizing it, you sigh and press closer to him, nuzzling into his neck. 

“Such a sweet girl,” he rumbles, chest vibrating against yours, “gonna take good care of you, sweetheart.”

You’ve cried all the tears you can and numb acceptance has taken its place. You don’t want to make things worse for yourself so you nod. 

“Okay,” your quiet voice mumbles in his neck. 

Surprisingly, this is the most he does to you for the rest of the evening. Just pets you softly and murmurs praise into your hair, dropping a kiss every now and then to the crown of your head. In some dark, messed up part of your brain, you’re preening under the attention. 

You’ve always shied away from attention that boys gave you; always told they’re only ever out for one thing. Your friends have come to you with tales of heartbreak or horror stories of how their boyfriends treat them. To have this older man so obsessed with you, wanting to take care of you, makes you ache with want at the same time it frightens and disturbs you. 

The argument that dark part of you has put forth is what can it hurt? Your mom will eventually come home and this whole thing is going to fall apart for Leon. Why not indulge in this sick fantasy while it lasts? Let him take care of you just to see what it feels like.  

You fall asleep on him like this, pulled under from the thoughts swirling in your head and Leon’s steady heartbeat in your ears. A loud buzzing sounds in the quiet and the warmth surrounding you disappears. You reach out and only touch empty space. 

Groggily, you raise up on your elbows to look around. Leon is talking softy on the phone on the other side of the room. You shiver, missing the warmth of his arms. Rubbing at your eyes, you stand up from the bed. Leon’s eyes narrow at you and he walks back over to your side. 

He pauses for a second as he sees you pull back the covers and then climb back into bed. 

“‘m cold,” you whisper to him, pulling the blanket up to your chin. 

“Let me call you back, okay? Yeah, you too. Bye.”

Setting the phone down on the nightstand, he tugs the covers up and slips underneath to lay next to you. 

“Sorry, baby, had to take a call,” he smooths a thumb under your tired eyes, “didn’t know you’d get cold.”

“S’okay,” you mumble, letting him wrap his arms around you again, enjoying the warmth they bring. 

“Such a good girl,” he praises, “I wonder if you can do me a little favor?”

You hum in reply. 

“Can you call me daddy, sweetheart?”

Your breath hitches and that dark part you keep hidden is excited at the prospect. 

“Yes, daddy,” you whisper, a hot flush of arousal making your toes curl under the covers. 

“Good girl,” he kisses your forehead, “such a good girl.”

He continues to kiss you, pressing one on each cheek, on one of your ears, across your jaw, and lastly on the corner of your lips. 

“Daddy,” you whine, eyes fluttering in embarrassment as you squirm from the attention. 

“Shh, babygirl,” he coos at you, kissing the other corner of your lips, “let daddy treat you for being such a good girl.”

Your hands press against his pecs, not pushing or pulling him away, as he kisses across your face again. His lips move closer and closer until he’s ghosting them across your own. With your bottom lip trembling, he presses your mouths together softly. 

You mewl and lightly scratch at his chest. This time he kisses you heatedly, tongue dragging across the seam of your lips. You pull back, eyes widened in surprise. 

“Uh uh, sweetheart, don’t be rude,” he tsks at you, eyes narrowed in disdain.

“I’ve n-never kissed anyone,” you duck your head, “I h-haven’t done anything.”

“Baby,” he croons, hand coming up to cradle your jaw, making you look back up, “I’ll show you, teach you what daddy likes best.”

You clench your thighs together, “Okay daddy.”

The side of his mouth ticks up in a grin, “We’ll go slow, don’t want to scare my sweet girl.”

Warmth pools low in your stomach. 

You’ve already decided on letting this thing happen between you two, so steeling yourself you whisper, “I’m not scared, daddy. We don’t have to go slow.”

“Oh?” his hands drag down your body until they settle on your lower back, “such a brave girl huh?”

You nod, biting your lower lip, “I can handle it.”

His cold, blue eyes crinkle at the corners when he smiles crookedly, “You will one way or another, sweetheart.”

Expecting him to push for more, you’re surprised when he just goes back to kissing you. This time you let him slip his tongue inside your mouth; it’s so hot and wet, it makes you whine, rubbing your thighs together. He lets his hands drift from your lower back down to cup your ass and pull you flush against him. He pulls back for a second then greedily licks back into your mouth when you chase after his lips.

You pant against his mouth, trying to copy what he’s doing, letting your own tongue slide against his into his mouth. He coaxes you to taste him, stroking your tongues together before pushing yours back into your mouth, chasing after you to eagerly plunder your mouth. A low whine builds in your throat and his grip on your ass tightens, his hips rolling into yours. 

He grabs your leg and hikes it over his hip, pressing up against you more intimately. You pull your lips away and moan at feeling his half hard cock pressed against your cunt, feeling the heat even through your thin shorts.

“Like that, babygirl?” He grins at you, swiping his thumb over your swollen lips, “we’ll get there, don’t worry.”

Your eyes flutter as he rolls his hips into you again, grinding against your damp center.

“Got you so wet already, sweetheart,” his eyes drop down to your splayed thighs, “already soaked through your cute little shorts.”

You feel embarrassment clawing in your chest, “S-sorry, daddy.”

“Don’t apologize, honey,” he coos, “just means daddy’s taking good care of you.”

He rolls you over onto your back while he raises up, “Let’s get you out of those clothes. You can’t be feeling too comfortable with it rubbing against that sweet little cunt.”

You gasp and press you palms to your face as more wetness fills your panties.

“Oh I know,” he chuckles, low timbre making your clit pulse, “take off your shirt too so daddy can see your tits, babygirl.”

You whine but do as you’re told, hands shaking as you pull your shirt off and fumble with your bra. While you’re doing that, Leon’s slowly tugging your shorts and panties down your legs. Your thighs are wet with slick, pussy throbbing and leaking.

“Mmm, good girl,” he praises, dark eyes taking in your trembling thighs and wet cunt, “got a juicy little pussy don’t ya, sweetheart?”

“Daddy,” you whimper, closing your thighs as you put your hands down to cover yourself. 

“Uh uh,” his eyes narrow down at you, pulling your hands back with one hand while opening your legs with the other, “daddy’s looking at your hot little cunt, so behave and sit there, baby.”

You feel more slick dribble from your hole at his mean look and dirty words. He lets go of your hands and you tangle them in the sheets. Your hips jump when he strokes his broad palms across your legs and up your thighs, pinning them down.

“Daddy just wants a little taste, sweetheart,” he hums, dipping his head down and kissing your hip bones, “wanna see if you’re as sweet as you look.”

When he swipes his tongues through your wet folds and across your clit, stars spark behind your eyes as you cry out.

“Sorry, baby, didn’t get a good enough taste so I’ll have to do it again,” his dark eyes watch you hungrily.

Even though you know what to expect this time, it still sends white hot pleasure pulsing throughout your cunt as he laps at your slick hole and throbbing clit. You moan and thrash your head, fingers gripping the sheets tightly.

“Mmm, you taste so good baby, knew you would,” his slick shiny lips hover over your clit, breath teasing across the sensitive bud, “want daddy to keep kissing your pretty pussy?”

“Y-yes, daddy,” you choke out, hips arching against the hold he has on your thighs.

“Good, so good for me, honey. This virgin cunt hasn’t been touched has she?” He thumbs across your clit, “you ever play with your cute pussy, baby?”

“No, I don’t— it’s embarrassing,” you whisper, eyes watering.

He groans, pressing a sloppy kiss to the hood of your clit, “Don’t worry, daddy’s gonna show you how to feel so good.”

He kisses your pussy lips, running his tongue through your wet folds until he’s pressing his face fully into your cunt. His tongue thrusts in and out of your leaking hole as his nose rubs against your clit. Feeling so much at once has you moaning loudly, heels digging into the bedding not able to move from the firm grip Leon has on your thighs.

He groans, the sound vibrating in your cunt making you scratch at the sheets before shakily grabbing onto his hair. His eyes flicker open and stare at you, pupils blown so wide you can barely see the blue. He greedily laps up the slick dribbling from your clenching heat. He presses his nose firmer against your clit and moves his face back and forth, rubbing his chin against your spread pussy lips while his nose bumps and grinds against your sensitive clit. 

“Daddy,” you mewl, petting through his blonde strands, “feels good.”

The whispered praise makes your heart race with anticipation and nerves. Leon pulls away from your pussy, face wet with your slick. 

“Yeah?” his gravelly voice makes you shiver, “seems like this juicy pussy needed some attention.” 

You whine, hips bucking, “Y-yeah, daddy, needed your attention.”

“Mm,” he hums, eyes dropping back to your throbbing clit, “she sure does. Gonna taste you some more, babygirl. Then we’ll see if daddy can fit some fingers in you.”

Gasping, your back arches. 

“Then he’s gonna taste those pretty nipples that are so hard for me,” he rumbles, “think I’ll give’em some love while I finger this tight kitty.”

“Daddy!” you feel slick gush from your hole, wetting the sheets, arousal burning hot in your blood. 

“Baby did you cum?” His dark eyes look back down at your thighs, a mean chuckle leaving his mouth, “god, you’re so easy sweet girl.”

 With a groan, he goes back to shoving his face into your cunt, tongue eagerly lapping into your fluttering walls. It feels like your orgasm never wanes, only continues to climb higher and higher until you’re crying out and cumming a second time against Leon’s tongue. 

When he finally pulls away from your oversensitive pussy, his lower jaw and chin are coated in your slick. 

He runs a thumb across his lips, tongue licking the excess slick off, “Taste so good, babygirl. But as much as I wanna stay down here, I really need to feel you cream your virgin pussy on my cock.”

Dread and elation make you feel dizzy with nerves, hands shakily running through your hair, “I-I’m nervous, daddy.”

He smiles at you, all sharp teeth and hard edges, not even trying to instill any comfort in you, “It’s okay, baby, daddy’s gonna make you feel so good. You’re gonna want my dick all the time.”

He moves up to lay between your spread thighs, mouth eagerly latching onto a hard nipple. He slips a finger inside your tight cunt and slowly thrusts it in and out. You cry out and scratch at his back. He swaps to suckle at the other nipple as he continues to loosen up your clenching hole. 

“Open up for me, baby,” he murmurs against your breasts, lazily sucking marks into your skin, “just relax and feel good.”

You squirm, but settle against the bed with a low moan; Leon takes a moment but then slips another finger into your pussy, using both to gently stretch your hole. He pulls his fingers out to spread your pussy open, mouth suckling at your puffy nipples. 

“D-daddy,” you gasp, eyes wide as you look down at him. 

Leon slowly circles your swollen clit, teasingly dragging his first and middle finger down to your leaking hole. He slips them in just a little and then drags the wetness back up to slide over your pulsing clit. You whine and buck into the feeling, guilt and arousal swirling through your thoughts. 

“Your mom called earlier,” Leon’s voice pulls your attention down to his serious gaze, “said she’ll be gone all week, baby. That I need to take care of you.”

He presses a kiss on your areola, lips dragging against your hard nipple. Your pussy leaks more slick out onto his fingers, dizzy with the thought of being trapped in this house with Leon for a whole week. 

“Told her it would be my pleasure,” he smirks at you, feeling your walls clench down on him, “daddy’s going to take very good care of you, sweetheart.”

Too many thoughts and images of Leon and you at home, all alone, flitter through your hazy mind. You’re sick excited at the prospect—all the things he’s going to do to you, things you want him to do to you— it leaves you dizzy and breathless. 

“Daddy,” you sigh, eyes drooping, “so good to me.”

His eyes narrow at you before a slow smile spreads across his handsome face, almost gleeful at your new tone, “Of course, baby. You’re my sweet, sweet girl.”

The tension in your body melts as his fingers continue to thrust and rub against a spongy spot in your cunt that makes you whine and roll your hips down into his hand.  Leon notices and his fingers speed up from their slow, steady movements to rough strokes until he slips his fingers out to rub against your wet, swollen clit. He pinches lightly before tapping his fingers wetly against the bundle of nerves then goes back to rubbing your clit softly. 

You mewl when he stops fingering you only for Leon to dip his fingers back into your pussy and scissor you open. Moaning, you lift your hips off the bed to angle your pussy to fit his fingers better. Having Leon take you apart across his marriage bed is making you feel dirty and desperate. 

“Good girl,” he whispers to you, eyes watching your blissed out face, “almost there, sweetheart.”

Leon goes back to mouthing and sucking at your breasts, his other hand moving down to rub and flick your clit as he stretches you open. He fucks his fingers into your soppy cunt a few times then takes his hand away. 

“Noo,” you whimper, eyes watering in frustration, “daddy, please.”

“Shhh, babygirl,” he soothes, lifting himself up until he’s kneeling over your naked body, “daddy’s about to make you feel so good.”

You watch as he slides his underwear off and tosses them to her floor. He then grabs his dick in one hand and presses the head to your leaking hole. Tears slip from your eyes as he pushes more of his fat cock into your virgin pussy. He groans, stilling to give you time to adjust and stretch around his dick. 

He brings a hand to wipe the tears away from your cheeks, “Doing so good for daddy. So wet and tight. Gonna love popping this cherry, baby.”

You whine up at him, head feeling cottony from the arousal swallowing your thoughts. He presses more and more of his cock inside your tight cunt, making you hiss from the pinching displeasure when he breaks your hymen.  

Your nails break skin, digging your fingers into the muscles of his biceps. 

“God, that’s it,” he murmurs down at you, stormy blue eyes practically black with want, “this virgin pussy’s all mine now, sweet girl. Gonna stay that way too.”

You only gasp and pant, eyes rolling back in your head as he keeps bullying his cock deeper and deeper into your cunt. 

“That’s right, baby,” he coos mockingly at you, “just need me to take care of you, show you what you need.”

He grinds his cock deep into your spasming walls, the fat leaky tip kissing the opening to your womb. You whine, static filling your brain at the pain the head of his dick causes as he keeps pressing against your cervix. 

“Daddy, h-hurts,” you wheeze, voice thin and reedy, “too much.”

“Hush,” he growls, a low rumble in his chest, “you just have to get used to it. Daddy’s gotta be this deep to feel good.”

Your legs kick out and he settles his weight down on you more, pressing your body firmly into the mattress. His pelvis pushes onto your swollen clit making you buck upwards with a low cry. 

“There you go,” he praises, slotting his  fingers with yours so he can press your hands above your head and hold them down, “just gotta train this cute pussy to take daddy’s cock.”

He chuckles as he noses along your hairline and drops a kiss to your forehead, “And look at that, you take daddy so well.”  

You blearily look down your body and see the bulge in your lower belly; you watch as Leon pulls out halfway and the bulge disappears before reappearing when he pushes back into your cunt. 

Your head drops back down to the bed as you moan loudly, tears streaming from your eyes as the pain and pleasure blend into a kaleidoscope of feelings. 

“Daddy,” you hiccup, “daddy, d-daddy.”

“I know,” he purrs in your ear, smoky and dark, “daddy’s going to cum in you, baby. Give you a little brother or sister. Wouldn’t you like that, sweetheart?”

At those words, your pussy spasms around his throbbing cock; you hiccup a sob as tears slip down your face, “C-can’t, that’s w-wrong, daddy.”

He licks the salty trail of tears on your cheeks as buries his cock into your pussy again making you squeal at the sharp pleasure.

“Aww my stupid sweet girl,” he huffs a mean laugh into your ear, pressing his dick as deep as he can inside you, grinding it harshly against your cervix, “just so fucking dumb. Daddy does whatever he wants.”

With a throaty growl he presses all the way into you, bottoming out in your wet, silky heat, “And you’re not even on birth control, sweetheart. So if I want to give you a baby, it’ll be easy for it to take.”

His thick cock splits you open, pussy greedily sucking him into your body as you cry harder because of Leon’s treatment. That dark part of you loves how he’s treating you—using you, breeding your pussy how he wants. 

You draw a deep shuddering breath, hands clawing at his biceps, “Noo, daddy, can’t—“

He’s thrusting into you still, making you feel split open. Your cunt feels raw and overstretched, his cock bullying deep into you on every thrust to the point it feels like your cervix will be bruised later.

“Knocking you up would be perfect, baby,” he growls burying himself balls deep and stilling, “keep you tied to daddy for the rest of your life.” 

You keen high in your throat, a broken moan slipping from your lips as your walls flutter and grip Leon’s cock. Clit throbbing with wanton disgust at how hot that makes you feel. 

He goes back to slow deep thrusts, dragging his cock all the way out until his fat tip is spreading your hole open then rocking deep into your cunt; you can barely breathe with how deep he’s fucking you, tears still slipping from your eyes. 

Leon moves each of your legs up over his shoulders, ramping up his pace to drill his cock harshly into your squelching pussy. 

“So fucking juicy, babygirl,” he pants, hips humping down into you roughly, “just listen to that fucking pussy cry for me.”

His pelvis presses onto your clit just right with every thrust while he rails you into the bed. You feel your orgasm ramp up with every thrust and slow drag across your swollen clit. 

Your thighs spasm where they’re pressed against Leon’s shoulders and your toes curl as your orgasm starts to hit you; a tidal wave drowning all your senses, your pussy clamping down on his cock like a vice. Your blood rushes to your head, dampening any noise, as you thrash underneath Leon’s body; a low, keening cry from your panting mouth has Leon growling in satisfaction. 

“Good girl, so sweet for me baby,” he groans, grinding himself into your clenching hole, “so god damn tight.” 

You choke out a moan, hands squeezing onto his until your joints creak, feeling overwrought as you keep cumming around his cock. 

“Fuck,” he hisses into your ear, hips stuttering, “going to make me cum early, sweetheart. Squeezing me too fucking tight.”

He presses your hands down into the bedding as his hips rabbit into your puffy cunt; half a dozen thrusts like that and he groans, cumming deep in your raw pussy. 

“So good,” he presses a wet kiss on your cheek, “love filling you up, babygirl.”

He drags his mouth from your cheek to kiss you, tongue licking into your panting mouth. You kiss back messily, feeling his cock kick and throb as he steadily spurts rope after rope of hot jizz in your pulsating cunt. 

Leon’s dick finally starts to soften and he slowly lets himself slip out of your wet heat. He sits back on his haunches and watches hungrily as his cum leaks from your hole, pussy looking swollen and puffy.

Your brain is empty, sick satisfaction radiating from your used body. Whimpering, you lay there as Leon swipes his fingers through the mix of cum and slick dripping from your cunt and feeds it slowly back into your drippy hole. 

His empty smile makes you feel small as he pets your hair back, “Daddy’s going to take such good care of you, baby. I promise.”

[jrueships]

Biggest squicks with the nba fandom?

squick?? AW, that's a cute word!!!! im stealing that now, thank u anon! for squicks in the fanfom.. hm um probs colorism towards dark skins & its unseen seen effects . i feel this way toward Fandom in general and life lol. U'll see it everywhere of course.. huzzah..

anyways yea. i feel like the nba should have a way bigger Fandom on here as a sport, i mean. At least bigger than some. The players don't wear a helmet so u can see their emotions, their expressions! Everyone's taking high quality pics up close! The ball isn't the size of a pebble going 50 mph like in hockey lol. There's no helmets!!! U can see them!! Like! I love it! I love seeing faces! I love football but it's the celebrations that rlly make it, esp when it's a pretty wr who u just know is gonna take his helmet off and do smthing funny for the cam!

But that's also probably why it doesn't have a big tumblr Fandom .. u can see their faces .

Even if u couldn't, u'd eventually see most of them aren't white so. Yea .

And abt the colorism aspect, most of the players that do have a big Fandom are light skin. That's why im not the biggest fan for 'all x positions are x' bcs i feel like that's a big thing in football where all qbs are bttms. Which is funny, and i can see it! Im not trying to ruin ppls fun! But when u see how a majority of qbs are usually white for most of history.. and the ones that aren't get some attention if they look like Tua .. but if they look like lamar jackson.. good f'ing luck trying to find bttm fics for that even tho dude's got a bbl . Even tho i believe in switch supremacy for a lot of ppl (lamar included), i feel like i gotta fight for more ppl like lamar even being able to bttm at all.

Meanwhile ppl like luka or Joey b are just automatically always bttms bcs. Yea. They're 'pretty', so u just gotta apparently. But ppl will say jrue holiday is pretty! But does he have any fics at all of him bttming? Nah. Don't gotta for him. Hm. Wonder why ( I know) .

And with the rise of biracial nepo baby kids in the nba, some of them rlly gravitate to the pg position bcs it's like the head of the machine, and they think they can run that well with all the experience of their pops. So all pgs being bttms are kinda just gonna turn into that qb scenario where it's all light/white pgs are bttms and the other guys can be included thru spoken word sometimes but Def not on paper. And I hate saying this bcs i feel like a Debby downer or smthing. I'm not even trying to call out anyone or anything, it's rlly just a personal vent noticing thing that i can't point out specifics to, i can just say I've felt things.

Ppl go into Fandom to have fun! I'm not trying to police shit. This is all personal venting. But like im here to have fun too, and when u happen to be able to notice more stuff, u kinda just. Notice it. And it doesn't feel fun

And I'm not saying they're totally ignored, dark skin ppl in media. We're def modernizing somewhat . But when dark skin ppl usually ARE included, it HAS to involve a lighter sided person. And it's usually the lighter person bttming and the dark topping. And like i can get it, u know. Sometimes it's just the personality dynamic where the appearance happens to have that! But sometimes the appearance seems to overwhelm the personality aspect, or the personality just isn't showing that strength in the fic and it starts to feel. Weird.

I'm not saying all ships where the lighter one bttms are bad tho. I'm not. But I am saying that it fucking sucks to always have to fight hard against 'absolutes' when the absolutes are always against u . Like. Idk. When i had a luka ship with dennis (a black player whos not lightskin) and mentioned how Dennis was a bttm and all a sudden i got an ask abt how luka can't be a top . Like. Alright man.

U know, cus it's like. U'd never get someone defending idk. Jaren like that. Unless ure me Lol. But that's the thing, like it always has to be me or smthing against the world which is fucking stupid bcs i hate that thinking. It's so selfish! Which makes it less fun to be in the Fandom sometimes bcs it feels even more isolated in an already isolated space sometimes. But that's a personal thing. Anyways

Yeah. It's just tiring sometimes.

It's like the only ships that have white/black player where the white guy is a top.. the black guys GOTTA be a power bttm or SMTHING to explain it like. We have to explain why our beloved princess white guy isn't bttming to idk some black dude lol. But if u reverse that then the white guy bttm doesn't have to be a power bttm bcs no one blinks an eye bcs it already makes sense to them or whatever. Lol.

Lol ..

[shreddeddescent]

OKAY!!!!

okay. so. i want to share this for anyone who is like.... cool about this worst case scenario bullshit i keep talking about. i think im writing it kinda good or at least in a compelling way, and honestlyyyy i just wanna post shit to be like hey. im having fun with it, and i think its really interesting to see how it all turns out. i think its been fun every other time ive posted about it, you guys seem to like it, but this is the part that will come off the most weird. if you dont know, ive tagged all previous things in this timeline as #wcs (worst case scenario)

so i think yall get this is like. the fucked up timeline. but like that its the going to be okay timeline too.

to explain more about it if you dont know, lets just say like. shredder did the fucked up thing he wanted. i think ive made that clear in previous posts about this. shredders dead now. they had to deal with the consequences of what he did to them. if the implications of that squick you out its totally fine. if youre not sure what i mean, im sorry. you DO NOT need to read further. but theres nothing specific about it here, this is just alllll the result of that. the results will be made clear by the end.

they went to big mama's hotel to get help from her with said consequences. its been dealt with. theyre now just recovering, being normal kids, still going to therapy. they're coping. but big mama's help always comes with a cost, but they havent figured out what that cost was yet.

so like. its been fun to explore in writing. IF YOURE WILLING to hear me out about all the fucked up shit turning out okay, feel free to read further. even if it sounds weird. i hope everyone can just be like.... respectful.

this doesnt have to be canon to the rest of my au, but if youve enjoyed it when ive talked about it....this is a big reveal shit for that timeline. if you are cool about everything im implying so far.

if youre not, again, you dont have to read forward. this isnt mature rated or anything, its just the implications of what the characters have been through are dark.

but the characters are going to be okay. and this right here is the reason they will be.

okay? okay. please be fucking nice.

missing context would be: raph saw someone in their room the night before, but he thinks he made it up. donnie also saw what he thinks was a ghost.

they went out for breakfast, and raph saw a turtle yokai he couldnt help but chase to the elevator who said her name was jennika, but she really wouldnt look him in the eye. and then they all discussed whether shredder had another experiment done before they existed.

questioning their origins, donnie and mikey scout the pool for recon as leo and raph come back from their joint therapy session with big mama.

--

The elevator door opened and they stepped out into the pool area. It seemed to be a rooftop pool, but the elevator had felt like it was going down. The view was the highest they’d seen, and yet the air was warmer than it had been in their room. And there was no wind, unlike their room.

They looked around and spotted their brothers, Donnie was sitting on the edge of the pool with his feet in, looking at his phone, while Mikey was doing laps.

Leo grabbed Raph’s arm and the two of them wandered over.

“Hey guys.” He said. “How’s the mission going?”

Donnie looked up and looked around. “No other turtles spotted here.”

Mikey jumped out of the water with a splash. “Yeah, just old people really. I don’t think they liked us.”

“You were doing cannonballs, that's why.”

Raph wandered over to the edge of the roof, resting his hands on the railing and staring out at the city. It was so high. Higher than fathers tower was. In fact he could see Foot Tower in the distance, dwarfed by this view.

He was above it. He was beyond it. But god were they ever high.

He felt Leo walk up behind him. “I hate this view.”

He sighed and nodded. “I’m surprised I don’t feel sick. I hate heights.”

He felt him step beside him and press his shoulder against his. “I know what you mean… it’s like it’s not a real height. There’s none of that wind whipping in your face. Like a big realistic dome with a view.”

Raph nodded, squinting out at the view. “The feeling of the window was freezing.. like ice. And here there’s no wind at all.”

“Me and Slash got Big Mama to tell us there’s some kind of cross dimensional portals between the floors.. that there’s protection magic around the floors. I wonder if something broke the one by our window.”

Raph tapped his fingers against the railing.

“Maybe…”

“You okay..?”

He looked up at him nervously.

“I’m… scared, honestly.. and I’m not sure why.”

Leo smiled down at him. “We’re gonna be okay. We got this, partner.” He held out his fist for a bump.

Raph ignored it to give him a tight hug.

Leo rubbed his back lightly and looked back over at the twins.

“Should we get the raisins out of here? Or do you want more recon?”

Raph sighed and let go. “I think I’d like to stay out of the room for a while. Try and relax.”

“Didn’t bring a bathing suit. Mikeys got those shorts, but you’re wearing jeans.”

Raph shook his head and looked around at what other yokai were wearing. Some were in bathing suits, others looked more naked from what he could tell.

He wasn’t sure if he was comfortable being naked though, shell or not.

“Maybe I’ll just sit.” He said as he spotted a lounge chair to the side.

Leo walked past him to go talk to the twins again and he watched them. He felt like a mom again. Out with her kids. At least he didn’t look like Splinter this time. Bathrobe and all.

It was about noon and the sun was shining, so it was getting busier the longer they stayed out here. But he just sat in the warm sun and let himself feel calm, he watched Mikey try and splash Donnie to coax him in, watched Leo strip down to his sweatpants to wrestle with their baby brother in the pool.

At some point Donnie wandered over to hand him his electronics and he smiled at him.

“You wanna get in?” Raph asked him, surprised.

He shrugged. “Might as well live in the moment for once. It is a nice day, and we’re not too weird here.”

“You want me to help you with your braces?”

“Nah, I’ll need them. I don’t care if they get wet.” He pulled his hoodie off and Raph stared at him. He never went anywhere without something on his chest.

He was surprised how weird it felt to see him like that in public. Donnie was somewhat round like Raph, but had more masculine features, for a turtle. But no muscle definition. Even in the cage he’d been wearing his hoodie. But he was feeling more free right now. Maybe this place was good for them.

Donnie pointed at his phone and headphones.

“If you don’t wanna join, you can like... Read or listen to music. There’s free wifi here.”

Raph hummed and put the headphones on.

“Thanks Donnie…”

He shrugged and made his way into the pool to try doing laps. Which for him was holding the edge the whole time.

Raph eyed the phone and looked through his music. Not much he recognized. He found Queen though, and decided to play that and close his eyes. Letting himself be a turtle basking in the sunlight for about 20 minutes.

He sensed someone sit near him and opened his eyes.

A tall furry lion Yokai was in his sunlight, looking down at him.

And suddenly he felt uncomfortable.

They seemed to be talking to him so he pulled the headphones off.

“Huh?”

“I said kinda a weird look for the pool. The jeans.”

Raph looked down at himself and back up.

“Yeah. Wasn’t planning on coming to the pool.”

He gestured over to his brothers with his head.

“Those your kids?”

Raph furrowed his brows and looked over at his brothers. They seemed to be having fun splashing each other.

“Kinda, yeah?”

“Huh. That one your… husband?”

Raph felt his face flush as he looked over at Leo.

“No, that’s my brother.”

He raised his brows and smirked. “So you’re a single mom?”

‘Female female female!’

His body felt cold despite the heat from the sun.

“Sorry, bet they dragged you out here without a bathing suit. Shame, you look like you’ve got a good figure…”

‘You’re going to get assaulted again!’

His heart was pounding in his chest. He looked in Leo’s direction desperately, needing someone to help him.

“Hey kid.” A deep familiar voice behind him said as he felt a hand on his shoulder.

The lion looked over him nervously.

Raph watched as the backside of a tall muscular turtle stepped into view, shielding him from the Lion’s gaze. They were wearing flowery swim trunks.

“That’s my son you’re talking to. He’s 17. Do I need to call security?” The voice said angrily. “Or are you gonna fuck off?”

Raph tried to quiet his beating heart. He felt like he might throw up. He felt like Slash might jump out.

And yet… This turtle made him feel safe.

“U-uh no problem man! My bad!” The lion quickly rose up and left. And the turtle took the chair and sat down beside him.

Raph looked at him nervously.

Broad shouldered and maybe 30 years old, his skin was a dull light green, his plastron wide and pointier than Raph had ever seen. Thick legs and strong arms. He looked tired but smiled warmly at him with wide, kind eyes.

“Are you okay?”

Raph stared at him nervously, pressing his hand to his chest.

“I-I might be having a panic attack…” he said softly.

The turtle reached out to offer his hand.

“You want me to count for breathing?”

Raph nodded quickly, taking his hand.

“In one two three four… out one two three four...”

He closed his eyes and followed the turtle's instructions. After a few minutes he felt okay again and stared down at the hand in his.

Two fingers. Their hands were so similar, but his were much larger.

He looked up at his face. He’d seen those eyes.

In the dark.

“It’s.. it’s you.”

He grunted softly in affirmation.

“You keep trying to get into trouble.”

Raph stared at him hard. He wanted to look away but he was terrified the man would disappear.

“What.. What's your name?”

“Kirby.”

“W-why are you following me? Why were you…”

“I just said you keep getting into trouble.”

Raph felt his eyes water as he stared at him.

“I-I’m not trying to, I thought I could just… be out in public, but I guess I’m too much of a s-slut…”

Kirby winced and leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees and holding Raph's hand in both of his, staring at him so kindly.

“You’re not. People always want to take advantage of you. I’m sorry, it’s not fair.”

“W-why do you know that..? W-who are you..?”

He shook his head. “Just someone who cares.”

“D-do you know Jennika..?”

He laughed. A familiar laugh. “Yeah. We know each other.”

“Why… why did she cry when she looked at me?”

He shrugged. “She’s got complicated feelings. Hard to explain.”

“I-I’m not scared of you. I should be, I don’t know you…”

“You kinda know me though.” He said, a weird glint in his eye.

Raph grunted and stared at him frustrated. “Why are you so vague and annoying?”

He laughed and shook his head. “I don’t know. Ah. Leo’s noticed. You should be fine now.” He pulled away from his grasped hand.

“Hey!” They heard Leo yell from the edge of the pool.

Raph didn’t turn. He watched Kirby bolt up and give him a salute before disappearing into the crowd, he presumed to the elevator.

Raph just stared blankly at the space he’d been.

Leo sat in front of him, dripping wet and waving his hand in front of his face.

“Are you okay?! Did he hurt you?!”

Raph looked up at him and shook his head slowly. “No… h-he… uh, saved me..? There was.. a guy trying to…” he closed his eyes and winced. “He saved me.” He looked back at Leo, who looked worried.

“What did he say? Did you get anything out of him?”

Raph rolled onto his back and stared at the pool.

“His name’s Kirby. He says I keep getting into trouble. He pretended he was my dad to make a guy leave… I.. I felt really safe.”

Leo groaned and lay back on the chair. “What the hell is going on…?”

“I-I didn’t want him to leave..” he whispered and held himself. His heart hurt.

Leo looked at him sadly. “Raph..?”

“I-I knew him… h-he said I knew him…”

Leo frowned and rubbed his neck. “Maybe it’s like.. You said he pretended to be your dad. Maybe it’s not pretend. Maybe he’s our real dad. Maybe he’s our dad, and Jennika’s our mom and that’s where we really came from.”

Raph looked up at him. “Jennika wasn’t female… she.. she had a plastron like you, not me. Her tail was long. A-and dad.. dad was so clear our human stuff is his… They couldn’t have made us.”

He sighed. “Let’s just imagine we get to come from somewhere better though, yeah..?”

He looked up at him sadly and nodded.

“O-okay…”

“Do you want to go back to the room..? Cuz we can go…”

He looked over at the twins and saw they were just splashing each other. It looked fun.

“I.. I wanna join, but…” he looked down at himself. He couldn’t swim in these jeans. It was naked or nothing. And he couldn’t do naked.

Leo smiled and bumped his shoulder.

“Trade pants. These are fine.”

Raph blinked and shook his head.

“Then you’ll be in wet jeans…”

“Eh, it’ll dry.” He picked up a rolled towel from a rack nearby and held it up in front of Raph as a privacy barrier.

“C'mon, you go have fun for a minute.”

He groaned and relented, unzipping his jeans and pulling them off. Leo dropped the towel on his lap for privacy and quickly undid his wet sweatpants and passed them to him. Raph put them on, they were a little snug and too long but it was stretchier than the jeans. Leo put the jeans on and smiled.

“See? Easy. I’ll watch the stuff, you go swim.”

Raph eyed him nervously and unzipped his hoodie.

He wondered if Yokai had weird gender rules even without nipples.

He tried not to let it bother him, Leo was being nice and it would be a waste to make him do all that and then just chicken out.

He tossed the hoodie on the pile and decided to jump in.

He let himself float on his stomach for a while, feeling the refreshing water and the sun on his back. He probably looked like a corpse.

He felt someone jump on him and whipped around, seeing Mikey had decided to clamber on his back.

“Raph’s here!” He cheered and hugged him.

Raph laughed a little and shoved him off. “Careful, I’m not that strong a swimmer.”

He looked around. Leo waved at him from the lounge chair.

Someone splashed him and he turned, seeing Donnie holding on to the side of the pool.

Raph beamed. “Oh? We’re doing a splash off now?”

Donnie yelped and started swimming away.

Raph laughed and chased after him, Mikey was cheering from the center of the pool.

“You can escape Donnie! Kick those legs!”

Raph caught up and waved his arm at him, causing a big splash to hit him in the face.

“Nooooo!” He cried dramatically and pretended to sink.

Raph laughed and dove under water, grabbing him around his middle and standing up straight in the shallow end to carry him over his shoulder.

“I caught you!”

Donnie shrieked and laughed, pounding on the back of his shell. “Stoooop!”

“I’ll save you!” Mikey rammed into Raph who dramatically threw Donnie into the deep end.”

And then Donnie didn’t come back up for too long.

“Shit.” Raph dove down and saw him sinking, he grabbed his arm and swam up, dragging him back to the shallow end of the pool and stood holding him up.

He was sputtering and struggling to breathe.

Raph held him against his chest and climbed out of the pool with him and patted him on his back.

“Cough it up, you’re okay.” Raph tried. He was trying not to freak out and placed him on the ground to sit.

He was still wheezing

Someone touched his shoulder and he turned to see a sweet turtle face smiling sadly at him. “I can help.” She said as she pushed him out of the way and waved her hand in front of Donnie’s chest.

She was gaunt. Her arms and knees were wrapped in some kind of bandages, and she was wearing a strange one piece swimsuit on top that fit around her shell. The shell looked too big for her body, slightly off center.

She waved her two fingered hand from chest up to his nose, and a floating bubble of water came out of Donnie’s mouth and then dissipated on the ground.

Donnie stared at her in awe. “W-water bending?” He was panting and taking croaky breaths.

She laughed a little and smiled, confused.

“I don’t know what that means. Simple magic. Are you okay?”

Donnie was clapping himself on the plastron, trying to breathe without croaking. She rubbed his shoulder.

Raph looked between them. Their skin was the same deep blue green. She looked like she could be his older sister.

“I-I think I’m okay…” he glared up at Raph. “Why would you throw me in the deep end?!”

He kept staring at the woman.

She turned to look at him and gave him a sad smile. “His knees aren’t strong enough to keep himself afloat. Maybe with some practice.”

He kept staring at her. She was his height, and much thinner. But she had the same flat plastron and short tail.

“…how do you know that?” He asked.

She laughed sadly and looked down at her own limbs. “Experience.”

Raph looked down and realized that her feet weren’t actually on the ground. She was hovering 2 inches above it.

Donnie seemed to follow his gaze and his eyes went wide.

“Are.. you the ghost?” He asked quietly.

She turned to look down at him and rolled her eyes. “Do I look like a ghost? I’m quite corporeal.”

Donnie looked up at her frustratedly. “You know what I’m talking about.”

She tapped her chin in thought. “Do I?”

He groaned.

Raph put his hand on her arm gently.

“I.. I know you…” he said quietly.

She turned to look back at him with sad eyes.

“We’ve never met. I’m Venus.”

“I’ve… never met another female turtle…” he couldn’t help but say.

She tilted her head sadly. “No.. I guess you haven’t.”

“I-I’m sorry…” he said suddenly.

He didn’t know why he was sorry.

She laughed a little. “You don’t have to be sorry, it’s not bad to be female.” Then her eyes got sad. “But I guess that’s to be expected…”

Donnie shot up and stepped between them.

“How are you floating? Is that like something you were born with or can you learn? Does it help with weight distribution? Is that why you do it? If I could do that I bet it would help. Oh but then you wouldn’t be exercising your knees…”

She blinked and sighed playfully, placing a hand on her hip. “You are too inquisitive.”

Raph stared between them. They had the same snout. The same smug look on their faces.

“Venus…” he said softly.

She turned to look at him. She saw something in his eye and winced, looking away.

“Anyway, I’m glad you’re okay, kid. Don’t go swimming where you can’t stand up, and keep a brother with you at all times in the water!” She saluted and seemed to float away.

Raph wanted to chase her but he just… let her go.

Donnie groaned and looked at him funny. “She could have taught me magic! Bones don’t hurt magic!”

Raph looked down at him sadly, he knew there were tears in his eyes and Donnie’s expression confirmed it.

“Raph what’s wrong..?”

“Sh-she looked just like you…”

He scoffed and folded his arms. “Hardly. She was thin and agile.”

He shook his head and reached out to touch Donnie’s snout. “She had your snout.. your skin.”

Donnie was looking more nervous as Raph looked at him. He pushed Raph’s hand off him. “She can’t have been my mother. Shredder would have seen her as useless damaged goods. Maybe there’s just.. turtle yokai out there who come in such variety that she somewhat looked like me.”

Raph rubbed his arm. He was right, if she was chronically in pain like Donnie, and small and female like Raph… she would have been dead to their father.

“You’re not sure though…” Raph said. Donnie was making a face.

He sighed. “Hereditary illnesses are a thing, I suppose. But I don’t think she was old enough… unless she was… you know, younger than us when it happened.”

“Which Shredder would never have done, obviously..” Raph rolled his eyes and hugged his arms, turning away.

“Sorry…” Donnie mumbled.

He sighed and looked over. “I’m sorry I threw you in the deep end, I wasn’t thinking about that. I was thinking ‘don’t let him crack his head’ more than I was thinking ‘he needs to hold on to the edge to stay up’.”

Donnie shrugged and leaned against him. “I get it. We’re not used to pools and stuff. Thanks for jumping in after me.”

Raph smiled and rubbed his back. “I mean it would be shitty of me to let you drown don’t you think?”

Donnie grunted and nodded. “Extremely shitty cuz it would have been your fault yeah. Still. Thank you.”

“Are you as done with pool time as I am?”

“Yeeees..” He whined. “Need to recharge.”

Raph laughed and nodded, giving his head a kiss. “Okay.”

They wandered back over to Leo and towelled themselves off, Leo stared up at them questioningly. “How did the recon go? I hope that was what the FAKE drowning was?”

Donnie rolled his eyes as he was letting Raph rub his back dry so he could put his hoodie back on.

“Unfortunately that was a real almost drowning. I am fine, thank you for asking.”

Leo winced and stood up. “Shit, sorry. Are you okay?”

“Fine. She literally water bended the pool water out of my throat. And she was FLOATING! Did you see that?” He couldn’t contain his excitement.

Raph pat his shoulder and decided he should collect Mikey while Donnie got him up to speed.

He turned to the pool and didn’t see him.

Mama turtle went in overdrive.

“Mikey?” He called out, darting between people in the crowd.

The more he looked the more worried he got.

‘Idiot, you almost kill ONE brother and LOSE the other?’

He groaned and smacked his head. “Shut up Slash.”

That was new but he couldn’t blame him.

He did a lap around the pool and saw the backside of a turtle behind the bar to the side. He rushed over and realized this turtle was bigger than him.

“Jennika.” He breathed.

She turned in surprise and he could see Mikey behind her, smiling up at him.

“Oh, hi Raph!”

He whimpered and rushed forward, ignoring her to grab him around his shoulders.

“Where did you go! I was worried!”

He grabbed his arms and pushed him back.

“I’m fine! I made a friend, see?” He held his hand out to Jennika, who was standing awkwardly beside them. She was wearing a big white t shirt and baggy trunks.

“Sorry, you… guys were distracted and I wanted to make sure he was safe somewhere…” she barely looked at him.

That hurt for some reason.

“Thanks…” he stood back up, keeping his hand on Mikey’s shoulder to make sure he knew where he was. “I.. sorry, I shouldn’t.. assume things but. You’re… not female like me, are you..?”

She blinked and shook her head. “Uh… no. I used to be… sad. About that.”

A new emotion came over him and he gave her a look of awe.

“Are you… trans..?”

She gave him a surprised look. “Is that… okay?”

Raph could feel his eyes water but he smiled big. “I… I’ve never met a.. I mean, you’re a turtle like me, and you’re.. trans too! A-and that.. makes me happy, I-I don’t know.. sorry, I’m not… not trying to be weird.”

She smiled and shook her head, her eyes were wet too.

“No, it’s not weird, I really get it…” she rubbed her arm. “I didn’t know uh…” she coughed and shook her head. “No, I guess I’d always hoped you were. I didn’t understand myself.”

Raph was confused by her words but kept smiling at her.

“You’re beautiful.” He told her. He didn’t know why he felt the need to tell her that. It was overwhelming seeing someone like him out in the world.

She stared at him with a shocked smile. Tears were rolling down her cheeks.

“O-oh…” she sniffed and then laughed, rubbing her eyes. “F-fuck, can I hug you? Th-this is a lot but..”

Raph reached in instantly to wrap his arms around her. He just wanted to make her feel as happy as he felt seeing her. She was taller than him and thicker up top, but she was just a beautiful turtle girl to him.

She seemed to be crying above him as she held him back.

Mikey wandered over and smiled up at her. “See, she’s a friend Raph!”

The two of them parted and Jennika got down on her knee to idly punch his shoulder.

“You’re a good judge of character, but you still shouldn’t run off with people. Not here. There’s bad guys here. Only trust turtles, got that little man?”

He made a determined face and nodded. “Got it.”

Jennika then leaned in to hug Mikey. It looked like a bone crushing hug. Mikey just took it and tried to hug her back just as strongly.

Raph looked between them. They looked.. so similar. She looked like if Mikey had been well loved as a child and grown up strong.

The idea was making him cry again.

“Jennika!” They heard a voice call out.

Raph looked over and saw Kirby again. He was standing by the elevator and waving her over, he looked frustrated to see Raph again, and maybe a little sad.

Jennika looked up and wiped her eyes. “Shit. That’s my brother, he’s gonna give me a talking to…” She muttered slightly annoyed.

Raphs eyes snapped up at her. “Kirby’s your brother?”

She winced and rubbed her neck. “Uh, it’s been nice talking!”

She shuffled away.

Raph was shaking suddenly.

“W-wait!” He started to run but they both looked at him inside the elevator with a sorrowful look and then disappeared.

And he dropped to his knees.

Mikey put his hands on his shoulders. “Raph? What’s wrong? Is it the voices again?”

But his head was silent, save for a ringing in his ears. He stared at the elevator blankly. It opened again and they weren’t there anymore.

He wasn’t sure how long he was staring, he knew Donnie and Leo had wandered up holding all of their stuff, and it took the three of them to lift him off the ground.

“What happened, Raph?” Leo asked gently as they walked his body towards the elevator.

He just stared inside. He hoped to god they’d just reappear and let him ask the burning question on his mind.

He couldn’t say this out loud until he knew.

The elevator door closed and it was just him and his brothers again.

‘You’re right.’

He whipped his head around to look, but realized the voice was Slash again.

“W-what do you mean I’m right?!”

His brothers looked at him funny but he paid them no mind.

‘You know who they are. And you’re right. Big Mama told me the first time you let me out, she wasn’t gonna crush the eggs. She said we’d never see them again. She lied.’

“B-but that makes no sense Slash! Th-they’re too old! I-it’s been a week!”

‘I don’t know. But you know that’s who they are.’

Raph slammed his head against the wall and shook it hard.

“N-no!”

Leo grabbed his shoulder and looked him in the eye. “Raph. Talk to me. What happened?”

Raph looked around the elevator in a panic. Mikey and Donnie looked scared of him, scared of what was happening.

“I-I… not here… I-in the room..”

He didn’t want anyone's secret eyes on him right now. He couldn’t trust Big Mama. Leo was right. Why had they bothered to talk to her at all today? They were better off on their own!

The door opened on their floor and they quickly rushed back inside their freshly cleaned room. Raph checked every room, every cranny. The windows were closed and no one was hiding in the corners.

After his panicked rushing he sat on the freshly cleaned sofa and tried to calm his breathing.

His brothers all stood in front of him in the conversation pit. None of them wanted him out of sight.

“Raph.” Leo said sternly. He looked up and saw them all staring at him with worried eyes.

He looked between them. He took a deep breath and closed his eyes. “It won’t make sense. But nothing here does. There’s.. magic and portals and dimensional travel…”

“At this point no theory is too out there.” Donnie said.

He opened his eyes and looked at them all seriously.

“They’re our kids.”

[skaruresonic]

Honestly, as fun as it was to go "Jesse what the fuck are you talking about" at the absurdity of fandom tourists who refused to engage with canon in good faith, it still felt like people explaining the nitty-gritty of how and why Freemance "didn't count" as pedophilia were giving the antis too much ground. Like they were implying there was a point that any given HL ship could be considered too problematic to defend.

As someone who ships Valhoun, which could arguably be considered more problematic than Freemance in this system of moral checks and balances by mere virtue of Barney actually being in his forties or so (although even that is debatable tbh), as opposed to Gordon's Schroedinger's Creepy Old Man Status, needless to say, I found the whole thing ridiculous.

To me it doesn't really matter even if Gordon was 47, because Half-Life exists in a context where real-life social mores don't apply as stringently. Humanity is on its last legs and Eli wants grandkids, yo. I have argued in the past that age gap squicks would likely lessen out of necessity following the Combine's breeding suppression. People need to procreate in order to repopulate the species, after all, and beggars can't be choosers. Kleiner said "get busy fuckin' or get busy dyin'" for a reason.

However, I'm not terribly keen on Freemance because Gordon's blank-slate status means I'd have to make up his characterization in my head, and it just doesn't seem worth the effort. I always feel like I'm shipping a dozen different versions of Gordon rather than Gordon himself. He also... just doesn't react to Alyx, making their chemistry incredibly lopsided. At least Barney goes "Eugh" when Alyx teases him about "not being an animal person"; Gordon just presumably stands there like :I when she cracks her Zombine joke.

Despite lifting somewhat in recent years, fandom has an ironclad "Barney is Alyx's uncle/big bro" fanon, which is just as annoying as "Shadria is incest" because it basically sprang out of nowhere. Canon seems to imply that Barney and Alyx are acquaintances at best, not terribly familiar with each other outside of their faintly overlapping social circles. Kleiner is honestly their only link. Barney, in fact, has less reason than most other older male characters to be considered one of Alyx's honorary uncles. At the very least Alyx suggests the possibility Gordon may have seen her once as a child; no such equivalent exists for Barney. The idea he babysat her is also hilarious considering he never even directly addresses Eli in HL2. On top of that, there's the issue of infantilizing Alyx, which I could rant about for hours. Yes, Valhoun may be just as "fanon" as Uncle Barney headcanons, but that doesn't mean I'm not thinking in terms of the series' overarching context. I view Valhoun as a sort of push-pull dynamic between Barney and Alyx, duty stifling love and placed inside a pressure-cooker of sexual repression. Hot. Plus, there's that forbidden fruit aspect of rebel/Metrocop lol. And while I would in a perfect world like to see the two be together, given HL's bleak world, realistically, I don't see it working out. Not even in an "Alyx dumps his ass for Gordon" kind of way, necessarily, but in a "they break up out of fear for each other's safety but there are still lingering feelings if they gaze in the other's wake for too long" kind of way. I have also argued that all three major HL ships bear imbalances. Valhoun does not suffer the experience gap that Freemance and Freehoun would; Barney and Alyx would have shared roughly the same life experiences under Combine rule that Gordon lacks.

[dufferpuffer]

Do you think the whole “alpha horny werewolf” trope works with how you see Lupin and his sexual interactions? (Like are there certain times in the month where he could fit this trope? obviously he can’t do it alot of the times because of his health/strength). If so, how do you think he feels about this? Does taking a more dominant/aggressive role make him feel weird after? Does he like it? Does he feel shame? How do you think this plays out with him and his partner? How would he approach initiating sex during these times? How does it differ from how he normally behaves? (Sorry a lot of questions lol)

Erm, Ahcktually 🤓☝ wolves don't even HAVE alphas I don't like the 'alpha werewolf' angle for Remus. I think being a werewolf DOES slowly change his body - because it changes Greyback's - but Remus fights that to seem nonthreatening. I really like his movie werewolf design - because it looks like SHIT. Can't even grow a full pelt of fur… he looks weary and sick, enough that a dog is a decent fight even full of adrenaline at moon-rise.

He isn't a wolf in sheep's clothing as much as he is a sheep caught within the body of a wolf. A passive people pleaser. He never gets worked up at anyone for anything.

He pities Greyback, who bit him at 5 years old, and sympathizes with him.

He doesn't get angry at Severus for revealing his secret - he accepts it, and is so well-versed in scurrying off that his entire packing process is streamlined.

When he AGREES with Sirius' point during a heated argument he doesn't help him - because it would mean going against others in the room.

What does he do instead of argue with Harry…? He shoots one hex - and is GONE. zoom. Harry only see's the ends of his tailcoat.

That's the angriest, most emotional we see him: Coat-tails flapping around a corner while he runs off to sulk. He doesn't wanna argue, he doesn't wanna fight - even about important things. He wont stand up for people. He has no backbone.

I said all that... because Im sick of seeing buff dom Remus Because I think there is a distinction to make: I do think werewolf-brain seeps in at the edges of the Full Moon, the day or two before especially. But its not Alpha wolf. Its just Wolf. Dumb dog. Instinct. desire. Food yum. Head hurt. Sex good. He doesn't have an 'Alpha' bone in his body... apart from his partners ;) I don't think he becomes a drooling idiot (without help, anyway) but he is more likely to do what he wants. Which he never does. He always leaves the last piece of cake for someone else. Wolf brain... doesn't think of someone else. Cake yummy - I eat. It's not that he doesn't care, it's not that he is angry - its that he has stopped worrying. He isn't being dominant - just a little more insistent and shameless. I have a HC, a theory, that your Patronus is based not on who you are as a person - but who you are when you're at your happiest. Remus' is a Wolf. He hates it - I think because he hates the fact that he is happiest when he is a wolf. He stops worrying, stops being overly polite... and allows himself to just be himself, without filter.

How do I think he feels about wolf-brain...? He is so meticulous about how he acts and appears - he thinks it is embarrassing. He is always appeasing people, so forgetting that and just living in the moment feels like he is doing something wrong... Intimacy is a good time to practice being a little greedy. If he is encouraged to follow his instincts like this, and nothing bad comes of it... I think that's incredibly healing for him. Its a necessity. The more times he can let loose a bit, close his eyes and do whatever normal or weird shit comes to mind in the heat of the moment - trust that everything wont go wrong if he follows his heart... good therapy. ...Did I seriously write all this just to say 'Remus is not Alpha, Remus is Good Boy' And if you meant Alpha as in that Alpha/Beta/Omega... I have no idea, sorry. Not my cup of tea. Squicks me out along with 'soulmate' stuff.

[love-is-a-pearl]

Oh, lmao yeah my bad I forgot to mention there were a lot of ships in there. I sincerely think everybody is paired is someone, but I opt to ignore the romance in favor of storytelling and character dynamics. I'm sitting there going "alright. make things worse. make relationships complicated, write ten different kinds of them and then write how they're mended." It's a study on writing to me but I forgot not everybody sees fics that way lol. Some of the things that stuck with me were the conversations adult characters have with each other, but if that content and (definitely more than one pregnancy) is a squick, that's so fair to avoid it. When I was a kid, I used to read those "spy AU" fics a lot LOL, I think my first Pokemon fic was one and it was a Pearlshipping one too. I'm not much of a shipper to begin with, so I'm very easily convinced by others. Ikari tho...Paul is too mean for that, I don't even know where the "troublesome" nickname came from and why it turned into a term of endearment XD It sure is hard to find fics without the main 4 pairing tho huh? Back to relationships tho, since you're on that anime rewatch, if there's any instance of say...oooh, like that episode with Lance and the Gyarados? Ash tried to use the friendship speech to talk Gyarados down, and Lance had to teach him that doesn't work all the time. I think a list of stuff Ash learns from others could be fun. You already got one with the Snowbelle City badge. I've seen a lot of good Ash fics that respect his personality for what it is, and good adults (like Kukui) coming to understand him. Brock and Misty too, I think this thing fics do when they touch upon their family situations and their personal growth is always fun. Hard to write, but really good. I've got one anime only thing you might like, and its this tribute video, type "Pokemon Bonjour Au Revoir" into youtube :3

No worries! And you're absolutely right about seeing ships as character explorations! I am trying to get out of my comfort zone and try other fics since there are some VERY GOOD ones out there that I don't know about because I insist on staying on the ash/dawn; ash&dawn; dawn/zoey or aro ash tags :v

Is not that I hate Ikari, is more that.. If I'm going to read Ikari then it should be from someone whose OTP is Ikari if that makes sense? Not the "this is a pokeshipping fanfic and I need Dawn to be with someone because of compulsory heteronormativeness" yknow? I think I've said it before but.. if you have no strong attachment for a ship, dont include it in your fics... It feels like following a checklist and it's irritating when characters personalities are twisted to make a ship work instead of idk just using those characters by themselves.

Main ikarishippers actually have very cool ideas from what I've seen in the wild (aka fanart). It just bothers me a LOT when every single living being is paired with someone in fanfics... BEING 👏 SINGLE 👏 IS 👏 NOT 👏 A 👏 SIN!

And yeahhhh QAQ there's always a 90% chance Dawn will end up with Paul in Pokeshipping fics, Kenny in Amourshipping and Chloe in Journeyshipping. And I just... ughhhh please please stop, she can be single i beg you Dawn is not going to steal Ash if you leave her unsupervised I prommy orz

Ohh that's a cool idea! There's indeed lots of instances he learns something that he takes with him for the rest of the anime but is easy to miss. Not to mention the other way around (people learning from him) that some absolutely deserve to be remembered and talked about more (Gary's Electivire using his tail just like Bayleef uses her vines my beloved)

And yeah! Fanfics that explore platonic relationships really need more attention. Is one thing the anime rarely focused on but when it did it was really good (Mallow's relationship with both her father and mother is something small but so special to me. I would love more explorations of that family and how she feels having to take the role of mother so young and how she wanted to just have people around her appreciate how much she sacrificed when doing that)

Ohh, thanks for the rec! That was such a GORGEOUS animatic! Is a very cute homage to the OG series indeed!

Leaving it here for anyone who wanna see it btw

[arttrampbelle]

villains have nuance.

FFS VILLAINS HAVE NUANCE!

There are layers to them.

Good,bad,noble,and absolutely despicable.

And if you wanna talk about how human a villain is. Especially if they are dark,tragic,and complex.

Then you need to talk about the characters positive traits as well as negative.

I tended to see this with some people be like this with frollo.

Ok so there is many media of him. But everyone is more familiar with the disney version. (My fave)

But even then all media,or at least some fans hot takes. Gets lost is translation of the main point of his character.

He is a victim of his own beliefs. Not nessicarly the religion. As the archdeacon is a kind man but is presumed catholic. But he doesn't do those things. So no,it's not the religion.

No frollo is a victim of a cycle of abuse. His mentors and potentially as a protege he was abused or instilled with legitimately the fear of god.

He lashes and takes it out on others because he has no real healthy outlet. He also more than likely would be not allowed or presumed by his own beliefs (more likely because again he was taught that by someone. Who? It's isn't said i believe but you can make something up. As this is a work of fiction after all) to enact in courtly love or gestures. And if he did,it would have to be away from public eyes but he feels the eyes of god and mary always on him. His neurosis and anxieties and fear got to him. (Again it's not that he isn't allowed per say. But he feels judged. Ironically he is also too....a judge. But that aside. He could participate in courtly love....if he got over himself)

He feels potentially the people needed a firm hand because he felt that way worked for him (it did not) this also is apparent in his relationship with quasimodo.

However there is things that he showed that is noble or kind. He always made sure quasimodo was fed,bathed,cared for. And only lashed out when he was angry or felt like he was being judged himself. His obvious decline in mental health and fortitude suffered really. Thus showing his darkest side.

(And if dude just jacked off we wouldn't be in this problem)

But even through it all. Frollo knew,he knew what he felt wasn't good. He didn't think he wa sin the wrong. But he didn't feel himself right either. And prayed god would forgive him for what he felt he must do (frollo you really didn't need to do that my dude).

Again going by my lovely knowledge and love of villains.

He got his comeuppance anyways. At least in the disney version.

So for others to add more context,their own hcs,or to play with the narrative a bit. Is fine to me.

Because

1. He's fictional. He ain't real. And we aint talkin bout irl people. (I know there are some people out here like that,but he's not real. And people need to understand that and know it's ok.)

2. He canonly got karma for his deeds. (And it was beautiful!)

3. People are allowed to explore and Express themselves. (Especially when it comes to art. Not all art is fucking rainbows. Sometimes we like to explore the dark and macabre)

4. Even for those who wanna explore and enjoy things i personally do not agree with about the characters. (I.e certain ships,hcs,etc) i still find it fascinating to see what people come up with. And to each their own. ♡

And if you have a problem with people like myself or others genuinely exploring a dark tragic villain character and adding more or explaining said nuance and complexities.

Then you don't need to look, It's as simple as that. You cultivate your own online experience. So yeah.

I know some find him squick(rightfully so) but i find him fascinating(and the late tony jay voice absolutely delicious. R.i.p).

I love judge claude frollo. And for fellow frollo enjoyers,i enjoy your work too. ♡

[marshmallowprotection]

Hey there Kait^^ I was wondering if you can give me some insight into your perspective of the question I've been asking myself.

It's about sexual intimacy, therefore I'll keep it simple. But, of course, you can explain and elaborate as deeply as you like.

I've been thinking about SE Saeran and how he would receive/persuade something sexual in his relationship. If he would ever try persuade it in the first place.

There would be a chance for one of them to try going further at some point, right?

How do you think would he respond to such indication? Would he avoid the topic? Or would he be the one doing a step when feeling more comfortable over time?

Anything to the question, please let me know about your pov. Because this is really a tricky thing to figure out for him.

I tend to not go into detail about these topics on the blog since everything is safe for work here. So, let's go over this with a very generalized response.

So, when I'm working with Saeran, any of them for that matter, I write with the notion in my head that he's a Biromantic Demisexual. I have always seen him that way. He isn't that invested in sexual intimacy but romantic intimacy is fine by him once he trusts you as a person. He won't go out of his way to seek a physical act like sex on his own terms.

Romance is hard enough as it is for SE Saeran because of how he feels about himself. He just can't stand to see the person looking back at him in the mirror. The person looking back at him is a real monster who has done things with his hands that he can never be sure will be forgiven. He is wary of intimacy with others for a good reason. What if he slips up and hurts someone again? Emotionally? Physically?

He can't do that.

He won't do that.

Sometimes, he thinks about sexual intimacy but more often than not, it's just something that squicks him out. There's a pull he feels but it's not something he wants to explore. His trauma is too much for him to imagine getting into a relationship to being with, much less one with sexual intimacy. It'll take months if not years for him to be able to feel okay with loving someone... or even being loved by another person. It won't be overnight.

This man would struggle with receiving verbal affection from the get-go... and everything that comes after that is going to be just as hard... it's not personal, either. He might know very well that he has feelings for you as a person, but he's not going to be able to voice that for the longest time. You'd have to be the one to broach that topic, and even then, he needs time and space to decide if he's—

If he's even okay being in a relationship with someone.

He's not going to seek out sexual intercourse. He's already going to avoid verbal intimacy! So, what does that mean in regards to what that means once he does get into a relationship? It means that you will need to take your time with him. You need to go slower than you think with him. Work your way through his comfort levels day by day and that will do a lot of good.

Getting him to smile after a simple "I love you," is a huge milestone. Getting him to say "I love you, too" is like reaching the top of a huge mountain. Brushing your fingers against his for a moment when you walk is another step in the right direction. Actually holding his hand for the first time is like seeing the sky for the first time. Hugging him is like.. you just tasted ice cream for the first time.

Kissing him is like discovering something that people thought was long gone from our eyes. Every step of intimacy is a challenge for his heart. One step forward can feel like two steps back. He has to brace himself every step of the way because each time he reveals another part of himself... it feels dangerous and he can't breathe... but being able to love you openly and willing is what motivates him to be okay with it.

If you want to have sexual intercourse with SE Saeran, it's going to come very deep in your relationship. Be warned that even if he does consent to intercourse, it might take baby steps to get to full-blown penetrative intercourse. Sexual intimacy can make you vulnerable in ways that Saeran might not have even realized when he said it was okay to share that moment with him.

Many people don't realize how vulnerable sex can make you if you're not prepared for your feelings, both emotionally and physically. You need to be gentle with yourself and know when to say "Keep going", or "We need to stop".

So, consent is key, a safe word is crucial, and your patience matters. If you respect and love him, this should be no problem. On the other side of this, if you don't want to have intercourse with him because it isn't something you want in your relationship, he's fine with that. His world doesn't end with sexual intimacy. He is content with a life with you that lets him curl into your embrace on a blanket with the warm sun kissing his cheeks.

Talk to Saeran about your feelings on the subject when you think you're ready for it. If you want sex, take your time, and if you don't want sex, that's just fine by him!

[jennawynn]

Chronotrek TNG Part 3

Season 2 Episode 2 to 9

2- ugh I am really not liking Pulaski.

3- I love that Geordi's Data's ride-or-die.

4- Was this comic supposed to be actually funny?

Recently I went to a 'neurospicy' meetup where we discussed neurodivergent identity, common behaviors, and media representation. Data is often lauded as one of the first, most recognizable, and most relatable of this representation, even if (and maybe because) he wasn't meant to be. This episode features a few things that we specifically spoke about, even though it wasn't about him: he studies humanity as though he is not part of it. (Several of us, myself included, were scholars of history, psychology, anthropology, sociology.) he over-analyzes his own behavior compared to that of others to try to fit in and act in a manner that aligns with what is expected or what makes others comfortable. (masking) he does not understand many types of humor, though he does tend to understand wordplay and logical humor.

One of the most pertinent topics we covered in this hour or two long conversation was how often what we say is mistaken for a joke. That we accidentally perform observational humor by stating something that we notice and someone else finds that funny. We might even become known as funny people... and that being mistaken for funny is the best possible outcome of the situation since the alternative is being labelled rude, out of touch, ignorant, etc. At the end of the episode, it is suggested that Data's timing is off, to which he replies "My timing is digital," and everyone chuckles. He then realizes the connection to the origin of that humor and tries to capture the same lightning in a bottle immediately turning everyone off. It was one of the most relatable things I've seen in all of Trek.

5- I really do like how they portrayed disability in TNG. Geordi's the most obvious example, but here they also have a Deaf character who speaks through his chorus. I have some concerns about how his translators are treated as extensions of himself rather than individuals with jobs (do they have rights? do they have time off? do they get to have relationships of their own?)

and unlike many recent shows where people with similar or parallel identities never actually get to discuss their similarities or differences, Riva immediately discusses his disability with Geordi. Do you resent being blind or being dependent on your visor? No, because they're part of me and I'm happy with myself. There is a little bit of a wish that they also showed someone who maybe had a different mindset, but I suppose in this universe at this time, anyone who didn't see their disability as part of themselves and instead as something that happened to them could have had it fixed. As always, it's nice to get a wider variety of experiences rather than only focusing on one... but if we can only have one, the one that adds to acceptance is preferred.

The way he was coming onto Troi was squicking me out, though I think it was because she seemed to be uncomfortable with it... and later I think it was more because there was an 'audience'. Once his chorus was dismissed, she became more comfortable with it and therefore so did I.

And there's Pulaski being a dick again. Twenty percent loss is NOT almost as good. That's an incredible margin of error when you're talking about sight! It is interesting to know that Geordi has chronic pain associated with his sight, but I think she was being insensitive to how he might feel about it, just assuming he'd want 'normal' sight.

6- Well this one's dated from the title alone. They've definitely been doing a lot of work to humanize Data and set up the arguments I know are coming in The Measure of a Man. This whole season seems to be reinforcing the idea that Data is both machine and something more.

"He is different, yes, but that does not make him expendable or any less significant. No being is so important that he can usurp the rights of another."

Beyond the obvious allusion to disability, neurodivergence, and race here, I'd like to point out the second sentence coupled with the fact that in 2x1 when Troi was discovered to be pregnant, almost everyone immediately suggested termination of the pregnancy means that the Federations is pro-abortion rights.

7- a force field? Have those words ever been used on Trek before? it sounds out of place.

Pulaski told Data to pilot the shuttle without telling him why. He should have been given the courtesy of informed consent. She just assumes he can't be affected, but she doesn't actually _know_ this for a fact, just as she didn't know the children were infected/carriers/the cause of the problem. Then, when she is stricken, he has to go with her, and honestly? should probably have been left there with her. To let him come back before they'd figured out the cause could have been dangerous. So she effectively sentenced him to quarantine on a planet FOREVER without telling him what he was getting into... because she doesn't consider him a person.

She has Bones's fear of the transporter. From @jbk405's replies earlier, the Doylist take I understand is more trying to make a New Bones for TNG, but the in-universe Watsonian explanation implies that medical professionals might know something about transporters we don't... and that could be interesting (Dr. M'Benga aside, I suppose, since he's keeping his daughter in there forever)

8- Riker on a Klingon ship. I almost wish it had lasted longer.

9- I think I've said pretty much all I need to say about this in the leadup. I do think the "why don't Starfleet officers all have to replace their eyes with cybernetic implants" is an excellent point, and I definitely saw the things he was packing as being foreshadowing for the trial later. I was expecting to see the same kind of uno reverse gotcha that we saw in Strange New Worlds with Una's trial. It was interesting to see it take the direction it did, spurred by a real life Black woman equating a fleet of Datas with disposable people and slavery. It was a nice touch to have her prompt that discussion instead of it being someone whitesplaining slavery to a Black woman. And I think Picard's reasoning is entirely in keeping with the Federation's goals.

To strip Data of his personhood would be a step backwards for the Federation, and I'm glad they went the other way, though I think that's how they should have phrased the actual question. Whether he is alive, sapient, sentient, etc. is not actually what they were after. They were trying to decide if he should be given the rights of being a person, which especially when you have several non-human races is a more important question than whether you are human.

[merchantarthurn]

i dunno man. this reaction to the finale squicks me out so much. i am deeply uncomfortable with people acting like it would have been better if adrien was told everything on the spot (eventually? yeah. right then? god no), or that gabriel was textually redeemed, or that the writers weren't aware that gabriel had done wrong despite them actively avoiding having him take ladybug's offer (which would have been far more like a redemption than what he actually did - violently reject her path and took his own in the end. like be serious)

i say this as someone who has been worried for a while about how they would handle gabriel as a clearly abusive man. and as someone who has been emotionally, socially and financially controlled and threatened by my own father (the height of it being when i was adrien's age, isn't that wild), but as in adult still struggles to call it abuse because like. sometimes your dad is horrible but you also have good happy memories with him. and a couple of weeks is not enough time to fully accept your dad did you harm and should have known better - especially after he fucking dies - and that's the case regardless of whether he's considered a hero or a villain by everyone around you. adrien expressing admiration to his father is not only consistent with his desire to see his father improve (because shockingly with the kind of abuse gabriel was up to, adrien was always going to hope for the good he saw in him to prevail. that's just how it feels) but is also not guaranteed to last - we have no idea how adrien will process his father's abuse alongside the grief he's also processing????

like i guess this finale made me so emotional, specifically that last part, because fuck if it didn't speak to something that felt pretty emotionally real. at least to me, as someone who can see a snap shot of my life in this family relationship. and to see people boil that down to "urgh the abuser got away with it" is kinda agonising honestly (not to mention everyone collectively losing their wit and forgetting that like... time exists, and shit changes? idk maybe the monster-of-the-week seasons broke people's brains or something).

just... like goddamn when i think about what i wanted re: dad like... what i wanted was to be safe and happy. if that happened by dad being gone and/or him never being 'punished' for the hurt he caused me then like... would i fucking care? the hurt is over. even as im still disentangling myself from him that's still all i want. i don't want my dad to face justice, i want MY justice - and that's to have some fucking peace!!! i am deeply glad they let gabriel die rather than find some way to save him so he's out of adrien's life, i am deeply glad he did it in a way that wouldn't entirely devastate adrien, i am deeply glad marinette chose not to tell him.

like. i get that so many people do not understand the complexity of recovering from this particular abuse-flavour (because there are many) but. justice is for the victim. justice prevents future victims. it's not justice for me to prioritise exposing gabriel over protecting adrien's happiness? the desire ive seen expressed to expose adrien to all of this and rend him apart is pretty goddamn ghoulish in this context - if you wish to explore that alternative, write a fanfic instead of insisting the only morally good way to resolve abuse is to further traumatise the victim of it

[gikairan]

Man.... my dad's family.... 😵‍💫

So my dad has been really estranged from his entire family for most of my life. He had a sister and brother, both older than him (And both have now passed). His brother specifically cut all contact with the rest of his family (And finding out he passed during Covid was.. a trial to confirm). But i'm not sure why he and his sister didnt contact each other for ages - i think it was about my aunts husband? I think my mums called him a paedo in the past, which... uuhhhhh... yeah.... fair enough for cutting contact.

Anyway, close to 10 years back now my Dad got back in contact with his sister. Or, mostly, his sisters daughter. My cousin, N.

It feels weird calling her my cousin because IM closer in age to HER children than she is to me? Like, mentally i think my cousins-once-removed as my cousins?

Anyway theres 3 of them - A (M), J (M) and E (F). I dont know which order theyre born in. I barely know A, i somewhat know J and know far more about E. Theres... a reason why that is.

Anyway, Js getting married next year and its at some... rural cottage/ converted farm?

And the last time he saw him, he said hed make sure to get my family (parents, me, sisters) somewhere to stay AT the cottages.

Well today i find that someone decided the sleeping arangements would be.... me and E.

And i guess the point is theres 2 women with no other +1s, so stick them together.

And when my parents heard about it, they were both pretty pissed.

See, uh... E is... uh.... hard to deal with. The way my parents described it was... me and her are two opposite ends of the spectrum. You literally could not find 2 people who are less alike.

And the idea of having to spend 2 nights with her is Well its my idea of hell.

I dont know if theres an actual diagnosis, but theres a suspicion she probably has some kind of personality disorder? I dont want to say this in a bad way, and i know she kinda cant help it. But she almost cant see how her actions might impact other people around her, and has a severe reaction to not being the centre of attention. I get the impression shes got pretty poor impulse control?

..... And shes very hypersexual. Which is not me judging. Its just that im ~*~SEX REPULSED~*~ Like, everyone is welcome to do what they want with their body and with whoever they want. The thought of it being anywhere near me makes my skin crawl and kinda activates my flight or fight response.

So someone who potentially has poor impulse control, and is quite free with her sexuality.... is not the best person to sit in a room with someone actively squicked by even the most vanilla of shit. (theres also the possibility that, if shes in a relationship when this wedding happens, shes going to have one of her fits over not being able to sleep in the same room as her partner)

And, look, i dont talk about anything to do with my sexuality with anyone i know in real life. Including my family. I dont want to deal with the awkwardness of it all, having to explain what the hell i am and what it means. its easier online? But i can figure my parents probably realise i dont have a lot of interest in this stuff. Given im 32 and never talked about a relationship, lol.

My parents now have to deal with the awkwardness of telling N that "no, this arrangement isnt okay". Especially because they know N will say "oh she'll be fine". ..... Because she always does. And i get its her daughter? Shes the most used to E, and what shes like. ... but this is a wedding where shes not the centre of attention. My parents, and me, know shes going to act out? Because shes done it basically every time ive met her...

And i get N probably doesnt know ME that well to realise id probably be VERY uncomfortable around E. But she does also talk with my parents a lot?

But, i dunno, can you really be that blind to how your daughter acts (or so used to it) that youd think her sharing a room with anyone (shes not in a relationship with) was a good idea? 😵‍💫

And, like, i do want to stress nowhere do i want to sound hateful, or not understanding. But she, as a person, is someone who feels almost specifically tailored to be the opposite of me in every single way. And i simply cannot get along with someone like that! I can act friendly with her in small doses, but that does not mean i get along with her? It means im acting nice around family....

And this very thing is making my parents not want to go to this wedding. And its kind of a shame because J seems pretty well adjusted? And i dont want my parents to miss out on something fun. But they also dont want to deal with E, even if i pull the card of "oohh nooooooo, i cant afford this" as a way to wriggle out of it.

[shenzuns]

KNOWING YOUR PARTNER WELL CAN POTENTIALLY MAKE WRITING TOGETHER A LOT EASIER. REPOST.

name.  kiwi  !

pronouns.  they  /  them  (  +  she  /  he  )

preference  of  communication.  uhhh probably... IMs or discord  ???  i give out my discord as much as i can, but i’m very bad at talking to people BHDFDJF

name  of  muse.  shen qingqiu, or shen yuan depending on who you get acquainted with...  first  ?  it’s very verse dependent, if you meet him when he’s transmigrated then it’s shen qingqiu bc by that point he’s given up his old identity as  “  shen yuan  “

rp  experience  /  how  long.  good god i’ve probably been here since i was like... 13? so...  8 years disgostang

best  experience.  shitposting  !  that’s literally all i do on a daily basis anyways, but my best rp experiences were when the community would kind of get together and do silly shit on the dash. i don’t see much of that anymore at all now lol, unfortunate  !  oh, and, in character games were THE shit like...  i still try to get those going when i can bc there’s nothing more fun than muses meeting each other for the first time to yell at each other about being the imposter or something.  also, when you kind of have a group of people who are in a specific verse, and matching urls, and just idk very community based things were always my type of beat  !

rp  pet  peeves  /  dealbreakers.  i...  don’t really have many actually  ?  it’s quite litchrally the basic principal that people have been touting for years, read rules  (  please god, i know he acts like a straight guy but my man is gay as all hell Do Not approach him romantically if ur muse is fem aligned  ), don’t try to play god without My permission, don’t forceship unless i say it’s cool cus i love forceshipping with my breasties, don’t... tell me what my muse is... or how he could be  /  act like... man.  uhhh, probably also like, feeling as though i have to diminish how powerful or mean a muse is otherwise me and someone’s mun will get off on the wrong foot like...  i’m sorry i don’t control my muse’s power level it’s on UR muse to not instigate a fight if u Know my muse is strong man.  uhhh...  when people complain about posting too much ooc like ok just say u don’t want to have fun or get to know the ppl behind the screen.  also, it kind of squicks me when ppl are like ‘oh ur character isn’t super canon’ like i already have phobias, don’t add to that man  ---  also canon divergencies exist.  and then other stuff is just stupid shit like, if we’re shipping and there’s no reciprocating amount of effort put in it just tanks me, and like.  fighting over ships too lawl like, i get if toxic ships aren’t ppls cups of tea but that doesn’t mean u have to kill someone over it  (  this does NOT include actually problematic ships, yall are adult enough to get what i mean here  )

fluff,  angst,  or  smut.  all i guess  ???  my fatal flaw is liking angst and smut but being too much of a baby to write it out and  /  or talk about it.  like, i’m very bad at writing angst but it’s all i give my muses so I Want To Learn.  and, re: smut i’m... weirdly shy  ?  which is funny bc it’s horny thoughts 24/7 here but i just get anxious and lock up even though i want to write smut. it’s fucked up and evil and i’m the bearer of the curse SFNFKMSF

plots  or  memes.  boooth...  i say tentatively, LIKE i’m kind of bad at plotting is the thing.  i prefer discussing character dynamics and then discussing how things can go from that.  also, s.qq is kind of difficult to plot with i’ve come to slowly realize  ???  but i also Have to plot with him to get anywhere, so u see it’s a pain.  BUT I LOVE MEMES i thrive on memes, it’s the best way i interact  !  i do try my best to send in stuff and i adore getting things in return  (  i’m just slow as fuck but i always smile when i get asks  )

long  or  short  replies.  UHHHH...  it really depends but i’ll be real, i talk too fucking much when i write SHDSFMKFDKM a bitch doesn’t know how to shut up and s.qq is an overthinker so he’s very introspective  (  TOO introspective u might say  ), so while i love the idea of short replies...  it never really works out that way for me </3

best  time  to  write.  man.  who even knows w/ me at this point LMAOO probably night though that’s when everything’s quiet for me and i can vibe, or like.  the early hours of daybreak.  but idk when my motivation, creativity and social battery are up there is usually when i start writing again

are  you  like  your  muse.  KIIIND OF  ???  my friend’s and i like to joke around that i’m kind of a shen yuan at times, i actually really latched onto his character BECAUSE of his neurosis but.  i dunno, i’m not as logic driven as he is, nor am i as stilted emotionally  /  with my affections.  so, yes and no  !  he can be difficult to write sometimes because of how different he is from me, i think.  i’ve never written a muse like him before, so it’s definitely a challenge, but a fun one  !  i also think it’s pretty natural to take on muses similar to you or put parts of yourself in a muse, bc how else are you supposed to understand them on a deeper level yk  ?  it helps with getting into a muses mental imo.

tagged.  @oftwilight​  thank u sybil, ily  !  <3

tagging.  @junshang​,  @feiyuie​,  @mellodiies​,  @kuurtaa​,  @chiheru​,  @hymnblood​,  @fuxian​,  @suender​  &  if ur reading this that’s it. ur tagged, @ me i want to see  !

[tennessoui]

I’m obsessed with all your fics and you but the a/b/o fic with a pregnant obiwan is killing me I love the floof so much

so happy you like the roadtrip au as it's one of my favorites too!!!

have about 2k more because youre awesome <3

(squick: a/b/o)

They’re somewhere in eastern Ohio when Anakin clears his throat and turns down the music. Obi-Wan’s back in the front seat with him, munching on a stick of beef jerky he’d never in a million years eat if it hadn’t been the most appetizing thing in that last gas station. Obi-Wan hates these cravings, can’t make sense of them at all, seeing as he hasn’t even eaten beef in fifteen years.

Anakin had just laughed and bought five different flavors, just to make sure Obi-Wan had something he liked.

All the rest of the food is in the back on his nest, which makes Obi-Wan a little grumpy because the only thing that should be on his nest is him and Anakin, but it’s not like there’s anywhere else for the food to go. Obi-Wan needs all the room in his seat to stretch out his legs, and if they put the food in the trunk then they’d have to stop every hour or so for Obi-Wan to get out and get it, which wouldn’t work at all, because Anakin doesn’t like it when Obi-Wan leaves the car, even if it’s just to walk around the side of the car to the trunk.

So the food is in his nest and Obi-Wan is coping with that intrusion fairly well. There’d only been some light pouting about it before Anakin had offered to keep it beneath his feet, but that would be too dangerous to even really consider, and Obi-Wan had shut up. His alpha would just be stupid enough to try it, too, if he thought that’s what he really wanted.

But. Obi-Wan’s munching on a long piece of beef jerky like it’s a carrot, and he’s thinking about what sort of things he should be eating for the sake of the baby, when Anakin turns down the music and clears his throat.

At first, Obi-Wan thinks this is because this is his music hour, and Anakin is just tired of listening to it.

But the alpha is tapping nervous beats on the steering wheel, not in time with the song at all, and it makes Obi-Wan pay attention.

“So you never told me what this alpha was like,” Anakin says, staring straight ahead. “This...uh.”

“Set,” Obi-Wan supplies.

Anakin’s proud jaw flexes and he purses his lips as he changes lanes. No one’s coming from behind them and they’re not about to pass anyone, but Obi-Wan’s a terrible driver, so he’ll give Anakin the benefit of the doubt.

“Right,” the alpha says. “Set. You never told me what Set was like.”

Obi-Wan takes a bite of his jerky so he doesn’t have to respond right away.

The truth is, he doesn’t particularly remember what Set had been like, other than surprisingly eager to get into his pants. He’d smelt vaguely like leather and rain, but what in Seattle didn’t smell vaguely like rain?

He’d looked like Anakin in the low light of the bar. He’d had the same jaunt to his nose, the same thick eyebrows. Almost--but not quite--the same color of hair. He’d been an alpha who looked like Anakin but looked at Obi-Wan the way Anakin never would.

And that had made Obi-Wan indefensibly weak.

“Ah,” he says instead of saying any of this. “I…”

“Never mind,” Anakin decides just as suddenly as he’d spoken. “You don’t have to tell me. If you don’t want to.”

“It’s not that I don’t want to…” Obi-Wan trails off, unsure of how to continue. Anakin’s tense on the other side of the car, and his scent is heavy and everywhere. “It’s just that we didn’t....ah.” He clears his throat and looks out the passenger window. “We didn’t talk much.”

The car swerves just slightly. Anakin must be tired. They’ve been on the road for nine hours, with the frequent stops calculated in.

“I think we should stop soon for the night,” Obi-Wan proposes when Anakin makes no move to say anything else.

“You didn’t talk much?” is the alpha’s reply. The tone is unreadable.

Obi-Wan blinks, his hands finding their way to his belly as he looks over at his alpha. Unreadable usually means angry when it comes to Anakin, but Obi-Wan doesn’t understand why.

“You just...what, you just saw him across the room making drinks and that was enough? Skilled with his hands, was he?”

Obi-Wan inhales sharply. They’ve been friends for so many years that they’re comfortable enough around each other to make jokes about their sexual preferences and partners. But this isn’t a joke. This has teeth and Obi-Wan’s already feeling sensitive. “I just...I was lonely,” he mutters, turning his body away from the alpha. “He reminded me of something, I don’t know. He was sweet. And clever and he made it clear what he wanted.”

Anakin draws in a breath, but Obi-Wan doesn’t particularly want to hear anything else. “I want to be done for the day now,” he tells the alpha as a blue sign with the next exit’s hotel options flash by them. “Please stop at the next exit.”

For a second, Obi-Wan isn’t sure if Anakin will, but the alpha surprises him by slowing down and taking the exit.

It’s nothing special, the motel they find. Feeling a little bit angry and childish about it, Obi-Wan demands that Anakin stay in the car while he goes and gets them a room. His alpha’s nostrils flare as the tendons in his neck stand out, but he agrees.

Good. He can stink up the car with his pheromones while Obi-Wan gets things done. Typical alphas.

Despite what Anakin seems to think will happen if he lets Obi-Wan out of his sight for longer than five minutes, the attendant at the hotel gives him no trouble at all.

“And would you like a single or a double?” the woman asks, staring at her computer. Obi-Wan falters.

He wants to say double, because he thinks it’s necessary to reestablish lines and boundaries between himself and his al--the alpha. He doesn’t want to take advantage of Anakin, feels awful just thinking about it. He wants to say double, because they’re just two friends taking a road trip together. They can afford two separate beds.

He wants to say double.

“A single should be fine,” is what his mouth says instead.

The woman hums agreeably and keys two cards with the information. He finishes the transaction feeling as if he’s underwater. What has he done? The woman hands him the cards and he walks out of the lobby in a daze.

His alpha is already mad at him for reasons he doesn’t really understand. How mad will he be when he finds out that Obi-Wan couldn’t control his omega side again, and now he has to spend the night pressed up against him? Sure, they’ve done that before, for weeks now. But this is different. Anakin can’t just leave if he decides Obi-Wan’s become too clingy. He’d have to sleep in the car if he needed to go.

The thought pulls a distressed keen out of Obi-Wan’s throat, and he doesn’t have time to banish his anxiety from his scent before Anakin’s there. The man hadn’t even been waiting in the car where he’d left him. He’d been leaning against one of the pillars of the hotel’s entrance. Obi-Wan has the ridiculous mental image of Anakin slowly slinking closer while Obi-Wan was inside, getting out of the car to lean against the door, then moving to lean against the trunk, then to one of the columns that holds up the ceiling of the drive-in entrance. Then to the entrance itself when Obi-Wan was taking too long.

The thought makes him more distressed. Anakin is such a good, protective friend, and Obi-Wan is still taking advantage of it.

Anakin is quick to wrap his arms around Obi-Wan and pull him into his chest in the shade behind one of the potted plants just outside the sliding double doors. He sniffs at his neck and then runs his hands up and down his sides as if he’s afraid someone had pulled a knife on the pregnant omega in the ten minutes he’d been inside.

“What’s wrong, what happened,” Anakin murmurs, resting his hands on Obi-Wan’s tummy. “Did someone say something? Are you alright? Omega, Obi, what’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” Obi-Wan sniffles, holding out the keys to their room. “They were…”

And then he lies. It’s about protecting himself, his child, he thinks. If Anakin leaves now, who will protect them both? He needs the alpha. More than that, he needs Anakin.

“They were out of double rooms,” he hears himself say. He grips at Anakin’s shirt with both of his hands and turns his wet eyes upward. He needs to keep Anakin looking at him and not at the mostly deserted parking lot. And Anakin’s the type of alpha who would drop anything to help a distressed omega. That’s always been Obi-Wan’s experience, at least.

“Are you…” Anakin furrows his brow and strokes over Obi-Wan’s tummy again. He’s had a fascination with it since the beginning of the pregnancy. “Are you upset you have to share a bed with me?”

“No!” Obi-Wan gasps, offended that that’s even the conclusion Anakin has drawn. “Of course not! I just...I’m sorry you don’t get the choice….” He falls silent when Anakin pushes his thumb against his lips.

“Obi, it’s alright, baby,” he murmurs. “I don’t mind, I really don’t. We’ve shared beds for years now. Why would this be any different?”

Obi-Wan pouts against Anakin’s finger, and the alpha graciously removes it. “Because...you wouldn’t be able to leave and sleep somewhere else if I’m…” he wants to say too much, but he doesn’t know how to phrase it in a way that won’t make Anakin say something he doesn’t mean out of sympathy for him,

“Didn’t we go over this already?” Anakin murmurs, petting his hair and making Obi-Wan look him in the eyes. “I’m not leaving you, Omega.”

It feels as if Anakin’s slipped in a bit of Alpha command, what with the way Obi-Wan’s body reacts to this. But what would the command even be?

“Let’s go get our stuff for the night, yeah?” his alpha says. “We can get the bed all set up in a nice nest, take a nap, and then find somewhere to eat. Are you craving anything in particular?”

Obi-Wan thinks about it as Anakin grabs his hand and leads him back to the car. Anakin takes out both their suitcases, but won’t even let Obi-Wan wheel one in.

He’s given the bag of snacks to carry instead, along with Anakin’s college sweatshirt.

“Pancakes,” he decides. “I really want pancakes.”

“Then that’s that,” Anakin smiles down at him. “Nest, then nap, then pancakes for the omega.”

“And the baby,” Obi-Wan says, framing his stomach with both hands.

Something dark flashes across Anakin’s eyes, but it’s gone before he can get a read on it. It hadn’t been anger though, he knows that for sure.

“And the baby,” Anakin agrees.

[salamoonder]

Alright, so here’s the thing. At this point, I actually don’t care what Artagan has or hasn’t done and, morally, what that means. It’s irrelevant. Interesting, but irrelevant. What I want to talk about is what the Nein, excluding Jester, know about him, and what they do with this information, and how they cast judgment.

Here are things that the nein have actually seen: fleeting glimpses of a figure in a green cloak. one conversation with a giant archfey who has recruited jester’s help in planning a convention. further, fleeting glimpses. very very brief phrases.

Here are things that the nein have heard about him from jester: he’s pretty cool, you guys :) . he’s got a chaotic streak, like her. he helps her pull off pranks. he’s always shown up for her. he’s handsome. he taught her magic. he kept her company when her mom was busy. he is her first friend. he is her best friend. he is her oldest friend. she really loves him.

and yes, they know he misrepresented himself to jester for years. they know he sent them to an island where you lose your memory every night. they know that he is sketchy as fuck and they do not know if he means what he says. and that is reasonable and understandable and fair.

here is something that i don’t know if you guys know about abusers, regardless of if artagan is one or not. (and he’s not. i’m not even going to say i don’t think he is, he literally is not abusive. words mean something; stop throwing them around because you personally don’t like someone.) you cannot tell their victims that they are abusive or awful or manipulative or horrible, and expect that to help. that makes it worse. the same is true of cults. you cannot, and i mean CANNOT, make yourself hostile, because then the outside world is hostile, and the abuser is safe. the outside world is hostile, and the cult is safe. furthermore you’re reinforcing what every abuser and what every cult plants in their victim’s heads--i’m the only one who would put up with you. i’m the only one who really loves you. everyone else will be cruel to me, but i’m the only thing you have. even if the nein had reason to suspect that the traveler was straight up abusing jester instead of just weird and shady, that is not a good response.

no matter how bad artagan is or isn’t, fjord, caduceus, and beau are still being condescending. they are still failing to trust that jester knows what she’s talking about. they are still trying to coddle her, they are still treating her like a child, and i want to talk about that. i want y’all to see that they’re still treating her like she’s emotionally fragile. like individually, i want to talk about that, and also the fact that everyone seems to want to lump caleb into this. (and yasha?? yasha has barely said anything about him, y’all.)

i’m going to skim over caduceus a bit because i don’t think his is a jester-centric problem. he tends to just trust that he either has the correct answers to a situation, or that even if he doesn’t know what’s correct, he knows what isn’t. this arc has been very interesting, because it’s been a lot of “i’ll play along with this because it sounds intriguing, but i’m going to be very self righteous about it the whole time.” like. the “we’re good” when jester brought up transferring followers to melora is haunting me. why “we’re good”? i get cad’s philosophy that not everyone is going to flock to one god--that’s fine, that makes sense. but the implication of “we’re good” really makes it sound like “mmm no thanks, none of these people would end up in my cool and correct religion anyway.” because he doesn’t know! he doesn’t know if any of these people would actually be happier and better off with melora. or. maybe he does know, or has decided, that they wouldn’t be, because these are not the kind of people that he could see himself falling under the same moral umbrella as. (lmao love how i said i was going to skim. anyway. again, less a jester thing, more a “cad is smug about everything” thing tbh.)

let’s move to fjord. he is quite honestly making me almost more uncomfortable than beau, because he’s making statements that i don’t really actually believe. “we just don’t want you to get hurt” is all very well and good. coupling that with agreeing with beau that they shouldn’t leave jester alone with artagan? without telling jester? does not jive. (i’m still not over the ridiculous of that, by the way. yeah this dude--no, this ARCHFEY, who could snap you in half in a moment--has been alone with her regularly for the first 20ish years of her life but now, now he’s going to try and kill her, and you’re going to be the one to stop that.) fjord keeps saying things like this--that he trusts her--but he doesn’t actually act like it. at one point he even says “if jester has faith in the traveler, that’s good enough for me, i suppose.” but it’s not, and he doesn’t act like it is. you know who actually acts like that? caleb. caleb’s getting his own paragraph though this is getting long as fuck. but if fjord actually meant that? he would’ve told beau “listen i know this situation is sketchy and i don’t like him anymore than you do but because i trust jester i also trust that she knows what she’s doing here, and i’ll be there to back her up with whatever she needs/wants me to do”. but he did not say that or anything like that. instead he agreed with beau to essentially be bodyguarding jester--without consulting jester about it at all. he wouldn’t have told jester “he’s generally full of shit, right?” about the traveler. jester is continually telling the group over and over again that she knows what he’s like. she knows Exactly how he can be. and the sad thing is, if fjord actually believed that she knew what she was talking about when she said that and if he believed that he could actually talk to her frankly and not that her feelings had to be protected at all costs (my skin is still crawling at “we don’t wanna ruin jester’s special day”. it’s not a five year old’s birthday party), then he would have straight up told her. he would have said “hey we’re concerned enough that he’s going to hurt you that we don’t think you should be alone with him. can we help guard against that?”

and i’ll be honest, i’ve kind of been squicked out by all the romantic posts about fjord and jester because he’s spent the last few episodes genuinely treating her like a wonderful but vulnerable child who needs to be protected from the world. when he told beau "I'm probably the least clued in as to how jester feels” i was like YEAH NO SHIT. and i know he meant it in a romantic sense but i feel that it’s true in general. like i get that he’s scared to talk to her. that’s fine. he doesn’t have to talk to her about her feelings, romantic or otherwise. but if he’s acknowledging that he does not at all know how she feels then he has no right to behave as if he does know. and again i don’t mean this in a romantic sense. i mean it in a, he is making the assumption that she can’t handle reasoned criticism of the traveler to her face, kind of sense. he and beau both are opting for “random insults, threats, and judgments they have decided apply” over “genuinely this is why we are concerned”. there has been a lot of “you don’t need him” and “you are better off without him” and “you’re better than him” and “you have us why do you need that” and those are judgement statements that are essentially meaningless. all they do is further demonstrate to jester that they don’t actually understand why she’s upset or what she actually wants.

i think caleb, mr i-eat-encyclopedias-for-breakfast, likely just has a better intellectual understanding of the fae and that may be why he’s not as outwardly concerned as the rest, but he’s also actually decided to trust jester that she knows what she’s dealing with. she has demonstrated both verbally and with her actions that even if she may not have known about artagan initially, She Knows How This Works. and he trusts that. caleb truly went “alright, i trust that you know what you’re doing, where do you need me” and that was IT. i’m not saying that he’s not allowed to be suspicious or concerned or wary of the traveler: i just don’t think he is. and i hate that people keep lumping him in with the rest of the nein “treating jester like a child” because they think he’s predatory or something--especially as caleb and fjord are pretty much the same age--when he is literally the only FUCKING person consistently asking jester how she feels and then actually acting accordingly.

and the thing is, you don’t have to be caleb and largely unconcerned, it is actually possible for you to show concern and alarm and wariness for your friend’s best friend without condescending to them and veth has been doing that this whole damn time. we know how she feels about him; she decidedly does not like him. but she set that aside to really fully listen to jester and then tried to be helpful to her in deciding what to do next, without inserting her own opinion. veth is the only one acknowledging that, sure, this looks really bad and i don’t like that guy, but you know him best, jester, and you know yourself best and so it should be your choice what to do in this situation. she reminds jester--if he is really a friend to you, and he is doing things you don’t like, then you can talk to him about that and he should listen. i want to talk about how when jester suggested that artagan join the mighty nein, there were exactly three reactions. extremely lame excuses from everyone but caleb and veth, “maybe, like, an annex--” from caleb, because he knows what everyone else is gonna say, and “we don’t like your friend” from veth, literally the only person who has apparently decided that jester can hear that without dissolving into a puddle or something.

and i want to make it clear--i don’t hate the actors. and stories are supposed to make you upset and uncomfortable, to an extent. they’re supposed to make you think. you’re not supposed to be happy when darth vader blows up alderaan. you’re not supposed to be happy when edmund betrays his siblings to the white witch. these are all excellent, excellent character choices and i applaud the cast for making them. and i don’t hate fjorester. and like yeah there have been a lot of cute moments in the last few eps. and they are cute and their story is compelling and it’s interesting. but i wish people would stop acting like fjord’s attitude towards her is perfect and lovely and that he trusts her sooo much when he is going behind her back like this. i am...the biggest widomauk shipper. and i have to admit my heart does the swoopy thing every time i rewatch the forehead kiss. but that wasn’t great. it was overall really not a good read or handle of the situation. it was, there was an attempt. and i do think fjord is trying. and i think beau is trying too. and i think all of their attitudes however terrible just come from a place of loving her and wanting to protect her. but--and here i must point frantically back at artagan--loving someone does not mean that you’re not hurting them.

[kinatalks]

Let’s talk about DiaLuci.

Look, this isn’t a judgement call. This is merely a flat out explanation and something that should be recognized. There will be a few S2-3 spoilers, but it’s mainly vague, not going into details.

Be aware: This covers sensitive topics regarding the ship, toxic behaviors, abusive relationships, and the angel event.

Firstly, if you support DiaLuci, good for you! I’m not here to shame someone for their ships. But this fandom has a habit of attacking others who aren’t so fond of this ship. Someone can like Diavolo, and not support Dialuci. You can support Lucifer, and not like Dialuci. Or hell, you could dislike either/or both characters and fucking love the ship! No matter which character or ship you like or dislike, you are completely valid.

But this is a post, about the issues with the ship that I personally see, and why it should be more outspoken.

Now lets get to the point of the subject, shall we?

I fairly like Diavolo. He’s charming, joyous, and someone who would be the star of a party. Someone cheerful and bright. However, the way that this fandom persecutes anyone who doesn’t like Diavolo or feels uncomfortable around him is not ok.

In my opinion, Diavolo has shown signs of immature and insensitive behavior. I.e. the way he treats others like toys. Yes, he cares about them, but often doesn’t consider their feelings in things he considers ‘mere pranks.’ This may be because Barbatos constantly assures him that the future will be fine, since Barbatos can manipulate and choose timelines.

He wants the best for the people around him, but doesn’t exactly take criticism or resistance to his advances kindly. “Well duh, he’s a ruler!” So? Yes, he’s a ruler, but that doesn’t mean he should be inconsiderate about others around him. The fact that he disregards others opinions unless it fits his agenda, is a sign of his childishness.

Which means, that over time, Diavolo doesn’t hold much regard to his actions, as Barbatos is always there to catch him. Now that doesn’t mean he constantly is reckless. When it comes to official Devildom matters, Diavolo is an apt ruler, who makes decisions for the Devildom’s best interests.

The problem is, no one has told Diavolo about his less than savory behavior. Because they fear him, and fear the punishments he could inflict upon them. So I can’t really say that he’s a completely bad character.

He wants Lucifer to be his equal, and acknowledge the fact that Diavolo sees him as an equal. Diavolo’s lonely, and it’s explicitly stated as so. He envies the closeness the brothers have. So, he goes about it in the only way he knows how. Which we’ll get to a bit later.

As for Lucifer, I can’t deny I’m quite fond of him. He does his best to overcome his pride for MC, and gradually (in S2-3), he becomes more open with his feelings. Yes, he’s a deeply flawed character, but he’s not a complete villain. The world simply isn’t as black and white as some would like it to be.

Yes, his relationship with some of his brothers is toxic. The way he treats Mammon at times is unacceptable, and possibly abusive in my opinion. The fact that he acts cold and distant to his brothers at times isn’t ok. But one thing I’ve seen others overlook, is that Lucifer is the Avatar of Pride. Does this excuse his actions? No. Does it explain some of his habits? Yes.

Don’t get me wrong, he still has a lot to work on. But he’s getting there, and actively trying to get better.

Now for the ship.

You do not need to like a ship, just because a character from that ship is constantly seen with the partner. Like I’ve said above, you can hate or love Diavolo or Lucifer, and dislike/like the ship.

As for the oath, I won’t delve too deep into this, as it would take essays upon essays worth of information. But we all know that, Diavolo had given Lucifer an ultimatum. Save Lilith, at the cost of Lucifer’s unquestionable loyalty.

Which as we’ve seen, Lucifer had agreed to the terms. And so, he is now Diavolo’s most trusted advisor, his right hand man.

Even though Diavolo says or implies that he sees Lucifer as an equal. He doesn’t always seem to show it. The power imbalance in between both characters is evident, throughout the plot of the story. If Lucifer denies Diavolo’s advances, Diavolo will continue. Why?

Well, you could argue that his behavior is due to him being royalty. Which is true, he’s royalty, and has never been told no. Barbatos has always been there, fixing his mess, so why would he need to worry?

Diavolo praises Lucifer, in a manner that is clearly uncomfortable to the latter. It’s evident that Lucifer despises being praised for his beauty, and just his looks. I’ve seen blogs see it as ‘just a joke’ or ‘being playful’. But time and time again, Lucifer has denied these advances, very obviously disliking the attention and focus on his looks.

But Diavolo continues, and in his defense, you could say, ‘because Lucifer doesn’t say that he’s uncomfortable!’. It’s very obvious that Lucifer isn’t an equal to Diavolo, no matter how much the latter insists he is. We’ve seen Diavolo brush off other’s discomfort at his actions, and we’ve seen him continue.

Diavolo is not evil. This is quite clear, even though he may be suspicious to some. However, his relationship tactics and methods of relationships have toxic, and quite possibly abusive effects.

For example. The angel event.

We all know, that the bangles controlled the 7 avatars, turning them all into angels. Their outfits, and minds, were taken over. The brothers, (excluding Satan.) had gone through traumatic events in these outfits, that’s for sure.

The celestial war, and losing Lilith, all were incredibly traumatizing events forever affecting their mindsets from that day forward. The bangles attempted to brain wash them, and we can see it when Satan states that he doesn’t feel like himself, that he felt calm.

But you might think, “But being calm is great! Isn’t that what he always wantd?’. Not quite.. All Satan had known before was wrath, and being calm completely took away an important part of him. Even though Satan had always resented his wrath, his sin, he had felt like a part of himself was miserable without it. He wasn’t himself, and felt as if he were being forced to be calm, something he loathes.

In all of the brothers, we can see that they are clearly distressed, and may come out of this situation traumatized. 

Lucifer is no exception. We saw how visibly upset he was, the fact that the snow-white wings on his back gave him a constant reminder of the war and Lilith, throughout the entire ordeal.

What was Diavolo doing this entire time? He was being provided entertainment, and reveled the sight before him. He enjoyed seeing the brothers in their angelic uniforms, where they had fought with tooth and nail for their sister, and who knows what else. He enjoyed the fact that the brothers were having angelic ideals forced inside their heads.

And when someone speaks up against him? He’s passive aggressive about it, until the person opposing him gives up, begs for forgiveness, or embarrasses themselves.

While criticism of any of the characters is deemed valid and peachy in this fandom. I haven’t seen any criticism of Diavolo that wasn’t met with backlash and intense hounding. Lucifer, Satan, Belphegor, have all been criticized, but has the majority really deemed those opinions as invalid? No. We can all see why those arguments are valid, and people have their own reasons.

Hell, we’ve all seen people Lucifer left and right. And you know what? They’re completely valid! Some people may have triggers/squicks in regards to his behavior, and it’s completely understandable.

But the moment someone criticized Diavolo, we see fighting and targeting. The person who speaks up gets pushed down and insulted, until they either give up, or agree. If you like Diavolo, good for you, you’re valid! If you don’t, you’re completely valid!

Now back to the ship. Apologies for getting off topic, but oftentimes, when Diavolo and Lucifer are mentioned separately, they’re roped together.

Abusive/toxic relationships aren’t always one where the abusive/toxic partner is an outright terrible person. Oftentimes, they come with charm, a dazzling smile, and friends that would fight tooth and nail for them.

Diavolo has Lucifer in an....uncomfortable position to say the least. In power dynamics, that is. Lucifer is constantly embarrassed publicly and privately by compliments, and Diavolo knows this. He’s demeaned by the oath, and as for work, Diavolo often adds to it, just for fun. I.e, leaving the Devildom to come to the human world, leaving his responsibilities behind.

“But he’s lonely!” Yes, and? He is lonely, yes, but there is a time and place for fun, and time and place for work. He is going to become a King, and if he puts all this responsibility and stress on Lucifer, it simply isn’t right.

They have their good moments, but that absolutely does not make up for the state of the relationship as a whole. Just because someone has their good moments, doesn’t mean you accept and forgive them. That’s like saying that someone who physically abuses their S/O, is a good partner because they occasionally make them dinner. It simply isn’t correct.

Majority of the time, Diavolo is fine with Lucifer being reduced to a pretty face and belittled. In public, which very clearly hurts Lucifer’s pride and reputation.

Many people can resonate with some of these behaviors, having seen them in their past.

So please. Tag your works as DiaLuci for others uncomfortable with it, stop attacking others who dislike the ship, and for fucks sake, enough with hating people who dislike a character and/or ship.