#but idk im being as honest as i can be
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advice on works flopping? ☹️
now me personally i don’t think any works are flops. oddly sappy but if you like your work then thats enough, most people on tumblr are shy to comment and give thoughts through reblogs lol so just go with the flow and post consistently, trust, that’ll get you somewhere!! there’s always gonna be those sweethearts who interact with you. i literally adore like the same five people who i interact with daily
#this felt so weird to answer#only cause im a small account 😭#im very sensitive and secretive of my writing tbh#so posting it for others is a feat in and of itself#but idk im being as honest as i can be#sappy? maybe idccccc#tbt to my bts account that was popular omg miss it#my social media aus hit man#okay im done#anon <3#angels <3#riri rambles
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Until then, I remain, Long John Silver.
Moby Dick by Herman Melville, chapter CXXXIV The Chase - Second Day
#black sails#bsedit#blacksailsedit#moby sails#moby sails posting continues! im not super happy with this but i need it off my laptop so i can focus on my other worse gifsets <3#john silver#james flint#the point here. idk. the point is about trauma transforming you.#the point is about being trapped in a story and not trying to fight it. this is how it goes.#and other people are trying to get you out but you know better! you're this forever! a billion years before this ocean rolled!#whatever. post <3#FUCKKKK ok edit: just realized I misquoted. first line should be ahab is forever ahab#that’s what I get for doing this from memory and not doublechecking before I post but it’s too late now!!!#most people won’t notice but I have to be honest :( i fucked up :(
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thsi picture looks like a romantic painting lol
#i ENPHASISE THE ROMANTIC PICTURE ASPECT OF IT#like#the lighting the composition it givessss romantiv#u can distinctly see the romanticized working life and stability of the painting#the 3 quarter rule is in effect too#your basic queerie#patti lupone#theater#i beliiiive this was during#idk if im being honest
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just Thinking Out Loud but im trying to prepare myself for the deltarune community to irreversibly change the same way it did when ch2 came out... its not really something i personally experienced back in 2021 because the game wasnt nearly as important to me then as it is now (understandably) (i just love chapter 2 so much)
and while i am Absolutely ready and excited for chapters 3 and 4, it will be kind of scary to see deltarune blow up again and the community grow vastly in size and Whatnot (i think about the other instances of this with other fandoms lately like gravity falls, fionna and cake, arcane, etc) (as an outsider looking into all those communities) and now im like Fuuuuck thats gonna happen to us!!!!!!
BUT ITS OK. BECAUSE EVEN IF ITS SCARY the important thing is that so many artists and musicians and fan game devs and whoever else are gonna produce amazing new stuff with the content ch3+4 gives us, and that's more exciting to me than anything... something you can honestly apply to any work of fiction getting a new part/chapter/season/whatever. I love when communities create!!!!!!
idk what this ramble was supposed to be it's just been something ive been thinking about for a while. The community ive come to recognize over the past 3 years is most likely gonna change drastically and i (the comfortable) am about to be disturbed by this But its necessary. life would be boring otherwise. i love videogames
#text#deltarune#also a bit scary now that in this community i am#(as humbly as i can possibly put this)#a “”��”“”“”“well-known”“”“”“”“”“” creator#idk apparently i will be dropping likes willy nilly on twitter and that makes people freak out sometimes#Im sorry. Its just me#but (scratches head) Fuuuuck even more eyes are gonna be on my work#i feel like now more than ever i have to Not freak out about being perceived#for a handful of reasons. some of which i cant talk about yet#anyway. Honest to god hope this doesnt seem like a whiny post or anything im really trying to be as positive as i can#MORE CONTENT ALWAYS GOOD. BUT THE FREAKS. AND THE IDIOTS#IM AFRAID!!!!!!!!!#but its ok. because awesome artwork coming ok?
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blacked out for two weeks after finals and then watched alll of tetro danganronpa pink to recover
N E wayz drawing wada over and over again until it stops looking bad, there will be more
#tetro danganronpa pink#tetro danganronpa#fanganronpa#wada masanari#my art#artlying#CHAT I LOVE HIM OUAGHHHH#i have to draw other characters too i love htem all so much but im too wada pilled#i wouldnt wish being a wada fan on my worst enemy#can the horrors STOP#LEAVE HIM ALONEEE#guys dont worry he and all his friends will make it through ofc :D#theyre all gonna get out and hold hands and be bffs 4eva yayyy yay <3#how do you draw his hair?? wtf why is it so hard#am i stupid be honest#idk why my art style is so strangely different here#alas its ok its just doodles#better waders coming soon hopefully
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how do i talk about taash being a realistic character while also acknowledging that they absolutely couldve and shouldve been written better in every aspect
#dragon age#dragon age the veilguard#datv#dragon age critical#taash#dragon age taash#i can only take so much “they act like a kid” takes from ppl#or ppl not understanding them saying no one likes being a woman#LIKE CMON#bioware get some non white ppl in that writers room im begging#get some non white trans ppl in there#anyway. i think some of how they act was unintentional can i be honest#to me they read as an autistic person that has a weird relationship with the world around them#i say this. as someone that is that. lmao#its like. man idk. them choosing a culture is dumb and ugh#but also their trans journey is interesting to look at#IDKKK#i wanna talk about them but i dont want weirdos or freaks in my notifs lmao#and like. god they couldve been written so much better#but also ppl not knowing that aqun athlok is a binary within the qun#and could get ascribed to ppl that ARENT that bc the qun has strict gender roles#but we dont see them look into qunari gender roles or customs#or rivaini gender roles/customs#UGHHHHHH bio ware you fumbled but also didnt but you did lord have mercy#if youre reading these#i hope you know these are just my scattered thoughts#one day ill do a real analysis on them#its an issue of them wanting the audience to know theyre nonbinary while also not creating an in world term#like aqun athlok. which again. does not describe taash lmao#and while i think its a good thing how up front their gender indentity is
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life is hard for us oz fans who are only meh about wicked. have half a meme.
#it's not even that i dislike boq as a character - he's fine. i think galinda is the most intriguing of the musical esp in her relationship#with power and how that relates to her relationships with other people. but boq is fine#i am just SO fucking tired of conflating boq wicked with nick chopper baum books#that's not my tin woodman. and i don't want him to be. nick (unlike many oz characters) has a very specific and set backstory#he has a whole damn book about it ffs#and boq is such a different character in terms of role symbolism and personality that i just cannot see him as even an au version of nick#fiyero too to be completely honest. though his mischaracterization doesn't bother me quite as much bc i read the book and he is rather#intriguing as a separate character - i don't love him in the musical tho. anyways specifically calling boq the tin woodman and saying#all the baum book stuff happened to him is so irritating to me because they are not at all the same. and nick is one of my favorite charas#in any media ever. idk. no hate if you like boq ofc and i don't want to stop you from having fun with the characters#i just am getting tired of the greater oz fandom latching on to wicked as fleshing out the baum or mgm characters. it's an entirely#different world. (and yes we can discuss the fact that wicked is intended to be canon compliant with the 39 film - but once again it's#a stretch to say it fits the charas. and that isn't the issue i have here.)#anyways. sorry. i'm just tired of wicked = boq = nick stuff#esp im annoyed at the fiyero and boq blorbo-ifying i see when the women of this musical are far more interesting and proactive#boq and fiyero are just furniture/pawns in the great drama that is elphaba's life and the way she pulls glinda into it with her#but WHATEVER i DIGRESS and shit. ignore this. whatever#it's the way people attempt to reconcile a lot of non-compliant media into whichever one they like the best. which is all fun and games#i am just being a hater. ok? this is me being a hater.#analysis#wizard of oz#wicked#wicked musical#toast talks oz#toasty talks
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im so glad im not the only person that looks at seungmin and goes "❓tism❓" bc he is Way Too Relatable to me as a person w autism
yeah..... like I say it in jest but also..... well, yk. sometimes you notice something and you notice something and you notice something and you go Hmmmm
#enby-peep#lol its funny for me personally bc i see a lot of stuff that reminds me of my cousins daughter........ and shes autistic#but everyone in our family constantly and my cousin especially is like Shes you. You are her. Youre so alike.#So you were autistic and that explains your childhood#and i was like Um. I dont know :) i dont know........ i refused it and then i went to the psych for my adhd#he was like 🤨 can you fill out these sheets... and it was to see if i was hitting the markers#and i was hitting them. I was hitting them out the park but i also knew exactly what to answer... not to hear it#so i just answered it... incorrectly to myself. anyway that was 3 yrs ago and i still go ???? why did you lie ??? wtf#so. maybe my seungmin commentary is sometimes a commentary on myself also#but its the same reason being sent to therapy as a teenager didnt work on me bc i knew exactly what to say to be#told what i wanted to hear- youre a mature smart young woman- youre good. id just lie to hear that even if it wasnt actually helpful#and i succeeded. Im a great actress. i didnt want help i wanted to be perceived as normal and i was for a minute. incorrectly.#and probably negatively maybe if i didnt lie i'd be different now but I did and I did it again 3 yrs ago but..... I think ive finally left#idk. my weird obsession with being 'normal' behind- i dont follow the script as much as i did before and im much more honest about how i am#this is an insane set of tags LMAO#so sorry#i dont talk about this stuff often and its An Anniversary today i accidentally used this ask as an emotional dumping ground#some people have journals (seungmin) i have tags on a tumblr post#peace and love on planet earth
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GAMING IS MY SON AND IF ANYTHING HAPPENS TO HIM IM GONNA KILL EVERYONE IN THIS ROOM AND THEN MYSELF!!
LOOK AT HIM HES SO CUTE
i still have hope in getting the other boys too
its ok they can be a band or smth.. at least then gaming wouldn’t have to be so disappointed in people not hiring him bc he’s just having fun with his boys…
#it took me soooo long to realize his name can also be 'gaming' and idk if i should be ashamed or proud lol#his hashtag is gonna get real funny real quick#is it actually an intentional business decision made by hyv#no way this was accidental#anyway im disappointed in his hair design but i stopped feeling much since all genshin charas always have the ugliest hairstyles#also him being another bennett just not as unlucky#he works so hard and still tries to achieve his artistic dream at the same time#but people just smile and ignore him…PAY THE DUDE!!!#ALSO ALSO.. chiaki 2.0 and they better add all other ryuseitai next#i just can get over how energetic and cool genshin concept designs are when the game keeps slapping us with a downgraded version every time#not to say current designs aren’t energetic or cool.. just not as much lol (still salty about red xiao and those flying nahidas)#now i know why they still not doing an art book yet.. they’re ashamed to admit of the amounts of good designs they never use#AND I LOVE GENSHIN DESIGNS honest (otherwise why would i keep doing fanart of this game and this game only for 3 years)#sorry i dont post all of them.... i have issues#but i cant help but feel robbed when i see these designs knowing what they could’ve been#and it’s in no way hyv’s fault *glance at leakers* and the new designs are getting crazier and cooler but#please for the love of god hyv stop with the mullets PLEASE!!!#gaming#ga-ming#gaming genshin#genshin impact
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Look they are anxious golden retriever x mental support black cat coded
P. S. Ignore the amount of different signs, it just that i have different signatures for different art accounts on different platforms, confusing i know, i think ill have to unite them sometime soon.
#this is so true#oh i love them so much#just check out the watson being kind of sarcastic mostly but also genuinely cheerfull and honest about his admiration at times#and the constant stress the dude goes through#and the way he truly cares and worries and misses his girl best friend#and theres sherlock#calm accepting#childish at times#kind#he mostly silently smiles at his friend but can also rant excitedly about his findings and watson will listen and sherlock will appreciate#this comfort that they can provide to each other and how well they are the opposites of each other#they create this perfect balance that makes their friendship work#idk im no damn psychologist i just like to overthink them#five papers of practice in and check this out they look cooool#sherlock holmes x doctor watson#soviet sherlock holmes#russian sherlock#fanart#drawing#doodle#sketch#art#victorian dads wow
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It's missing my father hours rn so imma just dump a bunch of pictures here and cry
( sorry i don't know the source of anything I just had them on my phone)
(also dont read the tags i just need to let it out lol)
#I just realized I can call him dad easier than my real dad and now I understand why am I so damn attached to him#I always knew he was a parental figure for me#but now I connected the dots#How when u have an absent dad and a d34d mom a guy shows up in ur life#that tells u life advice that both of ur parents failed to do so#and makes u feel safe the first time in ur life#ofc ud become attached#i know for sure its unhealthy how much i love and miss him#he occupies most of my thoughts honestly#But how could i not cling to him so much when he was the only one who gave me hope in life#i try to keep going and even tho he is not here i keep telling myself whatever he taught me. i keep reminding myself he wants us to live an#bloom and be free#and that's what ill try to do#but you know somedays i wish i could just disappear and be wrapped in eternal happiness#its so fucking hard to pull yourself out of the slump man im so fucking tired im so so tired#somedays i wish id have the courage to off myself but i know that deep down i want to live and ive always wanted to live but i have no idea#how to live. i feel like i finally found a purpose and someone i love. but at the same time im always doubting myself and im scared of losi#g this little hope again and i know i should cherish and use it instead but each day i have this anxiety because rn i have nothing else if#lose this i seriously will lose everything atp. but ill still try bc rn its this or death so i should try im just damn tired yes anyways#sorry for being depressing some days just dont work out but thats okay#yes at the same time i want to get out of my head and try to find some friends but i cant deny that im highkey fucked up and i just cant le#go of my past and i still feel like that helpless unloved kid and idk how to form relationships this way. i dont trust myself at all so idk#how to trust others. and i feel like in order to find ppl that would love me i have to overshare abt my whole lifestory bc it still dictate#my life heavily. and since i met this band its better cuz im learning to deal w it and i want to heal from everything but yes at the same t#me who would wqnt to be friends w. someone that has like a year of life experience and 18 years of depression lol#so yes its complicated. bc i have friends but im like the funny friend. the one that is as shallow as puddle and has no problems but honest#y im genuinely sufferint qnd have been sufferinz all my life so i want to come out of my funny friend role. but that wojld mean i have to t#ll the shit i went through to all my friends but tbh it would be so random so ye. i do have a plan though. how it could work. But yes im ti#ed have been tired for 7 years now. But this time around i hope i can successfully get out of this torture cycle lol.#ok sorry this is what happens after puberty guys i could beva research case for a damn mental institute atp xdd
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GODDDD BLESS A TIM DRAKE PLAYLIST WITHOUT TAYLOR SWIFT. thank u for ur service
lasdljfaksjdlfds happy to provide 🫡
#answers#mangojammm#i try not to judge ppls music tastes but if im being honest i just do NOT understand modern tswift songs being popular#i used to like some of her music when i was like in high school and some of her old songs i still can listen to for nostalgia value#but the new stuff just sounds to me like it was generated purely to be clipped for tiktok audios#like its just so generic and so monotonous and so. idk. It Sounds Bad kjshdjdlk#so yeah overall deeply just not my cup of tea.
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don't know how to format this post so welcome to waterfall is craving things and she doesn't know if it's more h-rny or lonely so enjoy a little snippet of what is playing on loop in my mind~
Person A: tshhieew!
Person B: Bless you, poor little thing~
Person A: I'm- eshh'iew! tschh- kngt'shhew! I'm not little!
Person B: Even if you aren't, your sneezes sure are~
Person A, blushing: No they're- eh'tnshiew! aeshh'iee!
Person B, with a smirk: What a poor, sneezy little thing~
#waterfallsnzarios#waterfalltalks#i guess??? idk man waterfallcraves is more accurate#just B taunting them and A being such a little blushy mess by the end#knowing that they ARE little but even if they arent! the sneezes are! they cant fight that!#not like they can fight being little either buutttt~ ;3#yes im picturing c/huuya but gotta be honest not seeing d/azai as the other#perhaps in a private little bedroom... away from prying eyes and ears...#or perhaps this is just something I crave okay i just- lil with lil snz auhegughguh#im a sucker for a kitten snz and i am! feeling things so welcome to this randomness that does NOT have a point~#(and yes okay maybe id like to be on either side of this BUT! shut up! i do not!)#(using this as a blog again- starting to get more and more used the idea that like... maybe i DO want attention???)#(always knew i craved attention but like.... always used to it being the kind of attention that i GIVE to others and maybe i get something)#(but not used to like... actual genuine attention thats just for me and that isnt kinda... idk- you give me things? so i give bak?)#(gonna be so honest!! i do not feel cute! most of the time! and usually thats okay! i like being a lil chaos gremlin :3)#(buuuuuut recently been having more friends call me cute and idk!!! maybe its not the worst thing to get to be a lil soft sometimes~)#(ANYWAYS blog post over im so sorry to anyone who read these tagssssss but here is a lil snzario that hopefully makes up for it!!)
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oh god stop whining about getting older. do yall realize how lucky you are? how lucky you are to have made it this far, to have survived everything life throws at you, to live in a world that others have worked so fucking hard on to make sure you have the best possible chance at survival. our ancestors did all this to ensure the world you inherit is better, easier, kinder, softer than the one they did. stop shitting out the self-deprecating “jokes” about getting old (they do not land the way you think they do. it’s just awkward), stop saying you’re “thirty-five years young,” stop claiming your life is over because you’re no longer in your twenties. do you know how many people would do anything to be where life is set up to help you succeed, survive, savor? do you know how many people died before they turned twenty-one when all they wanted was to live? to cook their favorite recipe again, to hug their best friend again, to watch the sun sink below the horizon again knowing that, in just a few hours, it will rise and they’ll be there to watch it paint the sky and prompt birds to sing. how dare you take for granted what the people who died too soon would have given anything to experience even once more. how dare you whine about wrinkles and grey hair and stiff, creaky knees when others have no voice with which to speak from beyond the grave, let alone callused fingertips to pet a dog, play a piano, peel a banana. how dare you whine about sagging tits and blurry vision and crow’s feet when you’re still alive to hear your next favorite song, to read your next favorite book, to meet your next favorite person, to eat your next favorite dessert. it is not a bad thing to age. it is not a bad thing to no longer be young or look youthful. your body has done the very thing it is meant to. treat it—treat yourself—with the respect you and your body both deserve.
#brought to you by me recently turning 30#and writing a very wholesome (in her words) message on the birthday card for my little sister who just turned 25#she asked why i made it wholesome. i said bc i am now 30 and no longer care to hide behind jokes#to which my mom said ‘i suppose that’s one good thing about getting older!’#and all i can think about is my past suicide ideation#how back then i never thought id make it to 25 let alone 30#in two years ill be the age my eldest brother was when he died#my older brother has already lived a year longer than him#i don’t want to spend the rest of my life—let alone another day—being too self-conscious to be honest#to be wholesome and affectionate#also idk if this even makes sense im so fucking tired and burnt out and i have a headcold#but oh well. hitting post and logging off.#ageism
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throwing out just One more hot dean and jack take while it’s on my brain but I honestly think dean gives jack a little more autonomy than sam and cas do . Maybe.
#heavy on cas bc I feel he’s a bit more … coddling? ? than Sam is ?#sam just kind of leaves jack to himself and vaguely offers support or advice#but Dean is the only one we’ve seen on screen that has a MUTUAL connection w jack#like their entire start and end conversations in Optimism abt needing to stay busy & blaming themselves#they GET each other#cas is just. idk#the argument he had with jack in 14x0…2 I believe ..#like jack is just CONSTANTLY trying to get ppl to understand that he makes his own choices and can handle himself#I cannot stress enough that he hates being treated like a helpless child.#there’s so much situational irony with that lmaooo#anyways#this is like half thought out I fear#I miss my guys#cal.txt#spn#supernatural#jack kline#dean winchester#dean and jack#tfw2.0#sam winchester#sam and jack#cas#cas and jack#like I do love Sam and cas as dads they’re all his dads . dean is just my favorite im sorry#if I said people don’t like dean as a dad that much bc he doesn’t infantilize jack …… would you brain me with a rock ….. be honest#liek … Idk#I am noticing patterns and I do not like them or the common theme they share#goodnight gang
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ima be real with you. they say "consent is sexy" and all, and like, yeah, funny, coming from a rapeplay account. but it's so fucking hot when you stop/pause a scene partway through to talk about boundaries or emotional shit with ur partner and end up knowing each other a little bit better and being a little more comfortable in the friendship as a result. mmf. i eat that shit up
#guys its so fucking important to have relationships u can discuss uncomfortable feelings in#without being worried you're gonna hurt the other person#and as a lifelong therapist friend / caretaker i still get terrified of being honest with my loved ones sometimes#but the more intentionally honest you get used to being. and encourage that honesty in your friends by not taking things personally#the lighter you feel. idk. i dont think this is just me but maybe i really am late to the emotional honesty fanclub#delete later maybe if i feel stupid about this later when im sober#toki unpa
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