#but i’m being realistic about this- aqua is NOT the problem

[mayushiis]

it’s kind of concerning how a fair portion of the oshi no ko fandom is blaming aqua for all the incest as if he’s still an adult and thus still able to be held responsible for ruby’s actions. just because ruby was a minor when she died does not excuse her from responsibility for sexually harassing and emotionally manipulating her brother 😐

[crystal-moon-101]

Managed to do another redesign with rewrite notes, this time my second favourite character in Ben 10, Azmuth The First Thinker. And just like Ben, he's canon self is such a mess that I wish to fix in my own way. The other Galvans in this picture are his family, with his father from the movie "Destroy All Aliens", his nephews mentioned by DJW, and their mother who is Azmuth's twin sister. So let me get into the notes and rewrite ideas of mine!

-Retaliator-

Yes, I am aware that this is most likely not his name, but I could not be bothered to make up my own at this point, and I also find it funny to have a Galvan dad called this, so I'm sticking with it. So Retaliator is the father of both Azmuth and Divi, a very humble and calm old galvan, who has seen a lot through his years, now retired and mostly just trying to keep the family together through small things.

Retaliator has the rare gene of having aqua/turquoise eyes, a recessive trait in galvans, similar to human with the red hair gene.

Retaliator looks younger than he should be, and that's because he is, in a way. You see, right before Azmuth vanished to start working on the watch, Retaliator fell ill to an disease with no known cure, and this caused the family to...kind of break down. A lot had happen up to this point (Things that will be noted throughout this), and none of them wanted things to end like this. So Azmuth did something he know he shouldn't have, as such a thing takes so much time and resource, and generally frowned upon, and ended up creating a new young clone body for his father's brains to be transferred too. By the time Retaliator woke up from surgery, his son was already gone, off in hiding. It this was event that really made Retaliator realize he may not have been the best father for a long time...

While he is retired now, Retaliator use to do work based around energy stuff.

Since he's family's back together, he likes to host game or movie nights, or even little dinners and get togethers.

He adores his grandsons, and loves to share stories from his past to them, and he's one of the few people they calm down around.

He will admit that he did...go a bit wild when he thought Azmuth died, fighting Ben in the Galvanic Mechamorph suit, but him and Ben have since made up, and the old galvan likes talking to the young lad often.

He has most defiantly embarrassed both of his kids by showing off baby photos of them.

He met his wife through work, like most galvans, with her being a much higher up worker. Surprisingly, despite their statuses, it was his wife who asked him out first, having found him very charming.

Retaliator can never thank Ben enough for convincing his son to come home, and despite their bickering, he enjoys seeing Azmuth's bond with Ben, as the two have a way of balancing each other out.

While he may be in a younger body, his mind is certainly still that of an old galvan, and can often act like his body is older than it really is due to the mental age of his brain.

-Azmuth-

Ahhhh, dear old Azmuth, how I love your character concept, and yet get so frustrated with your actual canon self...There is a lot I have changed in terms of his placement and behavior on the show, and while I can't note all of them down there, the major theme behind them is that he is not a complete jerk in them. Don't get me wrong, Azmuth would still have flaws and issues with his off-standing nature, but he would act in a way that feels more natural, showing his growth and change while mentoring Ben. He genuinely wants to help and is a good person, it's just...he still has a lot to work through. In terms of his slight redesign, I'll like to mention that if you look closely, his outfit is a mixture of his first original outside, crossed with his UAF outfit.

I did mention that I couldn't note all changes of him in series plots, since most boil down to be him being nicer and more realistic, but I will note one change because it's big enough to mention. For the Diagon/Forever Knight Arc, Azmuth did not create Ascalon, because I while I get he's smart and created things like the Omnitrix, I don't think he should be such a big source of dangerous artifacts in the series so often, especially ones that cause trouble. So instead, Ascalon was a weapon crafted in Ledgerdomain, to help fight Diagon who orientated there, and at the time had been trying to conquer earth, and Zenith leaving Azmuth happened because of miscommunication and issues between them instead.

That being said, Azmuth does get involved in the Ultimate Alien Diagon arc when Ben himself calls Azmuth over, needing his help knowing he can better understand Ascalon, and eventually entrusted Azmuth and the Galvans to keep it and the trapped Diagon safe.

Azmuth and his sister had a very rebellious phase as teenagers/young adults, this being the age that Azmuth said he was a lot like Ben, though admittedly, Azmuth was slightly more of an ass than Ben ever was. They were going through a tough time, and Azmuth reacted negatively too it all. Funnily enough, the one thing that seems to make him doo a 180 degrees in personality was his massive swooning crush over Zenith.

He won't ever admit out loud, but he does find Ben's trait of nicknaming his aliens kind of funny...

He shares a mentoring role towards Ben with Grandpa Max and Tetrax, with Max handling the more emotional and human side of Ben's problems, Tetrax handling the physical training and teachings, and Azmuth handling the more logical steps and hard truth Ben needs to hear. He's one of the few people to give Ben the smack of reality he needs from time to time.

That being said, Ben is also one of the few people able to handle Azmuth right back, and give him needed talkings to when the man is losing himself to a bad habit.

Mostly due to the fact that Tennysons seem to have a habit of making people very close to them like family, E.g with Ben seeing Kevin and Rook like brother figures at times, there seems to be subtle hints between Azmuth and Ben that there might be parent and child like moments between them, though both would deny it if brought up.

It doesn't help that Azmuth ends up taking it upon himself on making sure Ben is healthy and happy, based on scans from the Omnitrix he reads daily. Of course, he'll just say he doesn't want the boy he entrusted his watch with to die in a stupid way, but people close to either of them know that Azmuth really does care deep down.

He has said both "I'm too old for this" and "I'm too young for this" many times.

Azmuth has admitted that he's nervous around the Omnitrix, and doesn't like putting it on. He's not good at handling the idea of becoming something he's not...

The Malware arc for Azmuth was...a lot more complicated than canon. Azmuth really did try to fix Malware, but for some reason he couldn't, and it scared him that one, this might be the first problem he can't find a solution too, and second, he just came back from hiding and had been wanting to make changes in his life, so to fail and hurt someone already? He didn't know what to think. It didn't help when Malware started refusing his help and ended up endangering the lives of others, including galvans and Azmuth's own family. And despite it all, Azmuth kept trying over and over again to let him help Malware, but the villain always refused, until Azmuth eventually had to accept that he couldn't do anything. When Malware was finally killed, Azmuth went quiet for a good while, and needed time to recover from his mistake.

Due to some past issues, Azmuth mostly refers to his father by his real name, and only calls him dad or father during emotional or quiet moments.

Whenever they're hanging out, Ben likes to bring him and Azmuth cricket smoothies to drink together.

Despite how they seem to bicker often, Myaxx and him play off each other rather well, able to dry wit each other every day.

Azmuth and Albedo's relationship is also very complicated. Before Azmuth returned, Albedo was an outstanding Galvan and protégé, being praised every single day. This, unfortunately, made Albedo develop a prideful nature and his close minded views on the galaxy, as he rarely was ever put down or critiqued. His ego also got a bit of a boost when the great Azmuth took notice of him, and made him his assistant, and while he loved it at first, some issues started to arise when Azmuth wasn't like the other Galvans who praised Albedo to no end. That isn't to say Azmuth never complimented him and liked his work, but he was an honest man who knew no one was perfect, and especially wasn't going to worship someone, knowing what kind of ego that could make in someone. It doesn't help that Albedo just can't understand what Azmuth sees in Ben, and how the two bond, despite Ben's young careless nature, and being human. It ends up making Albedo want a lot more from Azmuth, the man he looks up too, and when he's denied that he eventually turns his back on the First Thinker. Azmuth can only hope that being able to turn into other aliens, and being stuck as human, will teach Albedo that Galvans, including himself, aren't what make the galaxy function.

Azmuth is typically one of the must unfazed people you'll ever meet.

Given most Galvans have an issue of seeing themselves as the top race, Azmuth is kind of fond of Blukic and Driba for being very open and helpful to outsiders, and was even the one to suggest them to join the Plumbers.

Zenith and Azmuth too meet up again eventually, and while they don't get back together, they do make amends.

Azmuth was fairly small for a Galvan for a long time, until he finally hit his growth spurt late into his teen years, something his sister use to tease him over.

Greymatter's DNA mostly comes from Azmuth, meaning Ben actually looks like a Azmuth when he was young, his family having made comments about Ben being his "Clone".

-Divi-

Here we have the twin sister of Azmuth, Divi. A dry wit, no nonsense, sarcastic and feisty single mother of her three chaotic sons. Unlike Azmuth's father and nephews, she was something I had to completely make up from the spot, since Azmuth was said to have nephews, that meant he had to have a sibling, so it was fun to create someone with an interesting dynamic with Azmuth. She is, after all, one of the few people to exhibit some of those petty family squabbles out of him. So I hope you enjoy her and her sons.

As mentioned before, Azmuth and her went through rebellious phases after some downfall in their family life, with Divi jumping around jobs and never settling for one, and even dating another Galvan that neither Azmuth or Retaliator approved off. When Azmuth first left Galvan Prime to go into hiding, Divi and her boyfriend had still been dating. However, when he finally came home, he found the boyfriend to be gone, and Divi now a single mother to three sons. Azmuth never got a clear story what happened to the boyfriend, but he knows that the break up was nasty, and that the boyfriend isn't on Galvan Prime anymore.

Sometime after Divi had her children, she eventually settled for a job in the nursery/incubation centre on Galvan Prime, looking after eggs and newly hatched tadpoles before they go home with their parents.

Divi is quite a blunt and honest woman, who has no time for dragging things on, and while she may sound harsh, she ends up just wanting the best for people. In fact her open nature of speech is how she gets people to listen and see reason.

Her and Azmuth had a...bit of a dysfunctional relationship growing up. Azmuth was actually a slow learning when he was young, and Divi had a habit of picking on him. They did eventually mallow out, until tragedy struck their family and they entered their rebel phases, and the bickering and arguing come from both sides. They have made up since Azmuth returned, but the two have their squabbles here and there, but they're mostly just playful banter or family habits.

Her and Myaxx get along quite well, and the two like hanging out with each other.

She's also fond of Ben since meeting him, and the two like chatting whenever he plays with her sons, he's even babysat for her a few times.

She has no interest in dating again anytime soon, and is proud to be a single mother.

She's the one who points out Azmuth and Ben's family like roles to each other often, mostly due to the fact that she understands what a paternal feeling is like, and because she's blunt about it.

She got her wisdom feet first out of her and Azmuth growing up.

While Azmuth was off in hiding, Divi reconnected with his father when looking after to him after surgery. So, unlike Azmuth, she mostly just calls him father and dad.

-Trapez, Cieven & Aegls-

The three mischievous nephews, sons and grandsons of the family. Left to right, Trapez, Cieven & Aegls, who are the triplets of Divi. The three are like glue, and are often playing or up to little tricks, creating chaos around Galvan Prime. While they mostly look the same and are all tricksters, they do have personality differences. Trapez is the best when it comes to emotions and the phycology behind it, something most Galvans struggle with, and can come across as the kindest of the three. Cieven has a lot of traits from Divi and Azmuth, being fairly intelligent and wanting to be a lot like his uncle someday, though does have some of their sarcastic nature as well. Aegls is the most energetic of the three, hype up often and quick with crafting and thinking of ideas. When you combine all three together, you get a force of endless chaos.

Their mother has been honest to them about who their father is, and why he isn't around, but the three have grown up fine without him, and will forever be grateful for the work their mother put into caring for them.

They were born while Azmuth was away, and so have been building up hype about their missing uncle for most of their lives, enough so that when Azmuth did come back, they all tackled hugged him while he was still understanding the idea that he was now in fact an uncle.

They love Ben and the Omnitrix, roping Ben into some of their pranks and shenanigans, and while Ben mostly tries to stare them into the right direction, he can't help himself half the time and joins in on the chaos, much to Azmuth and Divi's dismay.

They do become a part of my Ben 10 Next Gen Series, given Galvans take forever to age, and will finally be young tweens when the Next Gen takes place.

The three each have different dream jobs for the future. Trapez wants to be a psychiatrist or doctor, Cieven wants to be an inventor, and Aegls was to deal with energy based matters like his grandfather once did.

Never give these kids sugar or coffee, it will end badly.

The three...had a bad encounter with Malware during his rampage, and for a while were scared around Galvanic Mechamorphs...They get over it eventually, but Malware does haunt them for a long while.

They once picked up some colourful language from Azmuth and Myaxx when overhearing them once. You can imagine how Divi took that.

-The First Thinker Family-

The traumatic event that struck the family was in fact the death of Azmuth and Divi's mother, who was killed by someone who was after Galvan Tech. The family fell apart after that, with Retaliator falling into a deep depression and being distant from his kids, and Azmuth and Divi going wild in their teen/young adult years to distract themselves from the grief. They've all come together now and have been taking the proper sets to honor her memory, and become a family again.

While no one has outright said it, Ben has kind of become part of this little family in a few ways, and after a while Azmuth stops being survived when the boy shows up for family dinners or game nights.

They all live on Galvan Prime, though Retaliator is known to take trips here and there around the galaxy, wanting to see more of it during his retirement.

On the outside, many Galvans treat the family as there wise people, who have sage advice. And while that isn't wrong, once you get to know them they're a very chaotic family...

[goldensunset]

thank you so much for all the wonderful things you said about my latest fic, it really made my day!!! and YES I really agreed with everything you said about Kairi. I totally think people would have called her a mary sue if she’d absolutely destroyed xehanort all by herself. And as I said, literally no one except Sora, the freaking protagonist, has really come close. And the point you made about her being more interesting for not being OP really resonated with me too. If she’s so perfect she loses all dimensionality and texture. Riku has always been super powerful, but as a character he went though a gradual change and a long arc to redemption, and I want Kairi to get similar time to grow and change in a satisfying way. I really don’t want square to think ‘oh, if we just make her a girlboss of heart then we’ve given her more time like they want.’ And while I’m mad Riku didn’t want her to go with him, Kairi (my best girl) training with Aqua (my other best girl) is an amazing consolation prize! As long as her training, getting stronger, and stepping up for her boys is the way this arc plays out, I will be absolutely thrilled.

Anyway, thank you so much for what you said about my story, it means a lot to me when I’m able to move someone just from the words I put on a page. it makes me really happy to know im doing something right 😊 thanks again, sunset.

also Kairi gun. also Namine gun

absolutely no problem!!! your fic is just so full of the intense caring that they have for one another hhhh i swoon,,, me and who

i think kairi’s growth as a keyblade wielder is portrayed in a realistic way and i love that for her. can’t wait to see what goes on w/ her and aqua too. get it girlbosses (but hopefully not actually plain old girlbosses bc yeah that wouldn’t be all that satisfying)

also i did this in only half an hour with my finger but i think it’s funny

[epicspheal]

Hi again! Just wanted to know your opinion on the Pokemon villains, especially towards a chance of redemption. I think the only villains that kinda got redeemed was Archie and Maxie, learning that what they did was a mistake ( a little too late tho) and maybe Colress ( being the true neutral he is), through the Alola games. But yeah, what's you're opinion on them?

Hi Ihopethisendswell!

I’ve been sitting on this ask for a bit just trying to gather my thoughts. To be honest, the Pokemon Villains are some of my least favorite aspects of the games, mainly because in my opinion they’re rarely handled well (except for original Team Plasma and Team Skull, those guys are amazing and I except no slander of either)

I’ll start with Team Rocket. They have a very basic but realistic evil goal (especially in a setting as fantastic as the world of Pokemon). I honestly can’t say I dislike them. I would like to see more teams using their concept of just taking advantage of Pokemon for profit and selfish reasons rather than trying to tie in some philosophy (because to be honest in my opinion most of the teams who try to use philosophy to justify their extremism just end up looking really stupid for the most part). I like Kanto Team Rocket better than Johto’s plot and Rainbow Rocket was only good for the “what if” aspect and adding to the new multiverse lore. As far as redemption...I don’t think Giovanni or the grunts really deserve it.

For Team Aqua and Team Magma, I actually like them in a “so bad it’s good” type of way (definitely nostalgia based as even though I got into Pokemon during the original anime, I didn’t get to play a main game until  gen 3). Like the idea of having two separate evil teams competing against each other to see who can enact their plans first is a super cool concept in my opinion but wasted on the idiocy of the “expand the land/expand the sea” goals. I will say I enjoyed their Emerald enhanced plot and ORAS’s expansion on them in the Delta Episode. I think the Emerald clash of Kyogre and Groudon was the most logical conclusion to their schemes. As far as redemption goes, I do think Maxie and Archie should’ve served some jail time like Chairman Rose because their plan was just as catastrophic if not more so.

For Team Galactic, ugh. They’re my second least favorite. They were just boring and made an already painfully slow game even more intolerable. This is where I give the Pokemon Anime credit, they made them more interesting in the games and I actually really loved how it was adapted (proof that when they want to the anime can have some really solid writing). Redemption for them? Nope, you literally tried to rewrite the world. Even with Cyrus’ tragic backstory...still nope.

Now for Team Plasma. This is how you do an evil team. Easily one of my favorite teams to actually go up against in game. I like that they actually tried to tackle an ethical question with Pokemon in Team Plasma.  N was a fantastic antagonist and I’m glad he saw the light at the end and he definitely deserves the redemption. And all of the Team Plasma grunts who actually believed in N’s goal deserve redemption. I really enjoyed what they did in BW2 where they had the Plasma House with the misguided former grunts and the confrontation between the old team plasma and Neo Team Plasma about how ostracized the reformed grunts are. Although I don’t like Neo Team Plasma as much (although the outfits are 100 times cooler), it does make sense that the ones still loyal to Ghetsis would try for another attempt. Also it took me a second runthrough of White 2 to really appreciate Colress and his “this is for science” mantra but you know what, I love him. Him and N are really awesome and deserve the redemption. Ghetsis can go jump in a fucking volcano though, him and his followers (:  As for Team Flare, they suffer a lot from not getting a sequel or third version. But like Team Galactic the anime adaptation did a lot of good for them. Team Flare is like Team Aqua/Magma for me in that I think they’re so bad it’s actually good. They actually had some funny dialogue bits and there was actually a lot of potential for them storywise if we had of gotten another Kalos game. The Great War, and AZ all had a lot of potential. Plus having an Elite 4 member working with them? That was more of a twist than Lysandre being the boss. And the Xerosic post-game plot was heartbreaking. Redemption wise though, it’s kind of hard to do with a group who literally tried to nuke the world. 

Team Skull. I love these guys. I love them so much. This is another example for me personally of an evil team done right. I really liked how they weren’t even evil, just frustrated youth who were failed by Alola’s tradition. Like I could seriously go on about how toxic the Alolan community really is if the fact that a child failing the island challenge (a coming of age journey) somehow makes them feel so down about themselves and feel like rejects to the point they join a literal gang to find some sort of belonging (this is of course not talking about the origins of Team Skull being from a disgraced Kahuna who incurred the wrath of the tapus). Like I feel so sorry for them and I wanted to yell at the Kahunas in game for them not recognizing that their traditions were creating the Team Skull problem. Team Skull definitely deserved their redemption as they reformed in the post game

Aether Foundation though, ugh. Easily my least favorite. I really disliked the Aether Family as a whole as I felt they were invasive to the plot and that the focus should’ve been on team skull and how traditions while important can have harmful consequences. I will say it was nice to have female antagonist and I vastly prefer SM Lusamine to USUM Lusamine. USUM Lusamine was more redeemable but she was less interesting and USUM really screws up Lillie’s development which I dislike (which is saying something because I really can’t stand Lillie). 

Team Yell was a disappointment. Honestly there was so much potential because like Team Skull they are a very grounded team (as you can see, I like the grounded in reality teams more so than the philosphical extremist ones). Like I can totally understand why they would form considering how dilapidated Spikemuth is. The issue is that they aren’t given a chance to do much actual evil. Even though Team Skull wasn’t really all that bad, they still did bad things. Which is realistic given their desperation. As desperate as Team Yell was to get Marnie to become champion I was expecting more sabotage and outright hostility. Which while being bad, would be realistic given their situation. That and the fact that no one really calls out the fact the irony of their sabotage actually delegitimizing Marnie’s strengths as a trainer. Like is Marnie truly one of the strongest trainers from the gym challenge or were their people who could’ve beat her who got targeted by Team Yell and ultimately dropped out? Not to mention the implications of ongoing beef between Team Yell and Chairman Rose. Again so much potential wasted. If they had of just made them just a tad more hostile and had someone point out how they were unintentionally making Marnie look bad, they’d easily be one of my favorites.

Macros Cosmos. I think this was the team most screwed over by the plot, and the controversial anime adaptation did them only a few favors. I’ve said this before, but the royal twins historical manipulation plot was more interesting than Rose’s “I’m going to start the Galarian Apocalypse to save Galar” plot. And the sad part is Rose could’ve been a very compelling antagonist. I’ll say that if they really wanted to make Rose an antagonist, they could’ve taken away the Eternatus plot and just used his poor communication skills to cause problems for the gym leaders and champion. A bad boss with impatience and crappy communication skills is something many people can relate to, and I think would’ve been a more interesting plot than trying to force philosophical extremism on to him because.

And lastly the Royal Twins. Man I hated them, but also they’re some of my favorite antagonists. I think people at times look solely at their goofy hairstyles and entitledness and forget how dangerous these two actually were. They had a whole network of spies loyal to them? Imagine a game with them as the main protagonists where it gets to the point you can’t trust the NPCs because who knows which one supports them. Also their historical revision plot is something so relevant today with textbooks being written in a way to minimize horrible atrocities such as the trans-Atlantic slave trade. Granted their plot in game left a lot to be desired, but they had so much potential and honestly a better reasoning to want to awake Eternatus than Rose did. As you can see I prefer the more grounded teams such as Rocket, Plasma, Skull and Yell (in theory) and the Royal Twins given how their goals relate to the real world. I also think in many ways Gamefreak does better with those plots wiriting wise than the philosophical extremist teams. 

[snowflake-of-destruction]

Imagine Roxas’s reaction to seeing Axel shirtless when he started getting buff for the first time

Enjoy the distraction of the evening and Roxas and Sora bonding, and be warned of language and reference to adult situations.

"Can I complain to you about Riku for a second?" Sora asked. It was perhaps not the ideal time to start a new conversation as Roxas was in the process of landing the gummi ship in a clear spot of grass in the courtyard outside the entrance to the keyblade academy at the Land of Departure, but that was how Sora was, keeping things in and then letting them explode forth at times that often seemed odd to others, but were simply the breaking point to him.

"No, I require at least ten minutes of complaining about Riku every week,"Roxas deadpanned, guiding the ship down between two others already parked. "You know the time table. Three minutes without air. Three days without food. Seven days without busting Riku's silver dusted balls."

"Gold," Sora chirped, unbuckling his restraints and going for the door.

"I'm going to regret this," Roxas sighed, half to himself as he followed suit,  "But...what?"

"Gold medal," Sora grinned. "Everything in that area is nothing less than first place." 

"Strongly disagree." Roxas screwed up his face in exaggerated disgust.

"You have no way of..." Sora complained as they started up to the castle.

"Please, can we get to the complaining?" Roxas cut him off.

"It's official even. The council of judges, me and Data Sora judging pictures saved on my gummi phone, awarded him the blue ribbon. I tied it..." 

"I will give you all the munny in my munny bag not to finish that sentence." It was pretty clear to Roxas that Sora was torturing him on purpose for crimes of his past lives. Sometimes he still hated his other.

"Then I suppose you don't want to hear about the ribbon cutting ceremony either? Or, well, it was more of a ribbon untying ceremony. I'm not usually good at tongue tricks like the cherry thing so I was kind of proud of myself that I managed to..."

The pattern of hasty interruption of an oblivious or happily malicious Sora continued. "For the love of sea salt ice cream, Sora, I'm begging you to stop before I hurl."

"What were you talking about before?" Sora blanked and grasped at straws of stray thought. "Tortillas?"

"What? Why would you think that?"

"It was taco night when I came up with the ribbon ceremony."

"You were going to tell me how much Riku was annoying you."

 The enlightened glow of remembrance entered Sora's eyes, but the spark of happiness at conquering his brain only lasted a moment before Sora was collapsing against the doors of the castle academy, playing up the drama of whining, "Riku is driving me crazy!"

"That's more like it! Tell me all about it."  Roxas was perhaps a bit overzealous in his support, judging by the look Sora shot him, so he tried a more nonchalant and less gleeful tone, "You'll feel better."

"He keeps looking at me like I'm going to disappear in front of his eyes. He's woken me up in the middle of the night to make sure I'm still breathing. He keeps tripping me up in battle because he's started diving between me and the Heartless, like all of a sudden I can't take care of myself. I know why it's happening, and I know he means well, but I'm not sure how much longer I can take it. Do you have that problem with Axel?"

Now, he and Axel had to work through some anxiety about being separated again. It had taken a lot of long talks, time, and trust exercises, to work through them, but now Roxas could help Sora with Riku's issues from the point of view of someone who had been there before and gotten out. Or he could just make a joke. "Well, I'm afraid he'll get caught in a strong wind one night and snap in half, but I'm trying to keep myself rational. I mean I can stick unwound hangers in his clothes to try and create a brace from something more substantial than his limbs, and I can put a bell on him so I don't lose track of him when he turns sideways, but after we take all the precautions we can, all I can do is tell him to be careful lifting his keyblade so it doesn't break his arm, and look at the positive. He and Jack Skellington wear the same size jacket and being able to trade clothes with  the King of Halloween is pretty cool."

"What are you talking about?"

Roxas steeled himself to be drawn into a serious talk anyway, taking a spot leaning against the doors alongside Sora and putting a hand on his shoulder, dearly hoping someone didn't open the door from the other side and send them sprawling. "Listen, I picked a ridiculous example, but the same principle applies. Take measures to keep each other safe--simple ones that don't stop you from being able to do your job-- talk about what his fears are, and then just try to find silver linings and agree to live your lives. You guys are going to be okay."

"Oh yeah, I know that,"  Sora dismissed, shaking off his hand. "I was just letting off steam. Riku's actually being really sweet. I just need to make him realize what he's doing before he finds a way to sacrifice himself again to keep me safe. What you said about Axel doesn't make sense though. He's ripped."

"He's a twig," Roxas countered with a scoff. "He's got the muscle mass of the jelly creature from Monstropolis, and looks like it the time it let me suck it into a large straw to make Boo laugh. I love him but he's a scarecrow. My stickman scarecrow, and I love him, but let's be realistic."

The light of dawning realization lit Sora's eyes once more, and Roxas found it a bit unnerving. He was definitely missing something. "...Haven't you visited Axel since he started training with Terra?"

"No, this is my first visit, to see Terra confer the master title on him." Master ceremonies had become a big thing now, a little pomp and circumstance to make it seem more important, Roxas guessed. Riku had missed out. Too bad for him. "He was on a journey of the soul as well as the body...Whatever that means. Terra didn't want me distracting him."

"That's what makes it more fun. When I went to retake my mark of mastery at Yensid's tower...Wait a second, Terra ordered you to do something and you just listened?" Sora's pursed lips and glaring eyes spoke more of tantrum throwing toddler than betrayed friend.

"He's a master," Roxas answered simply, though it wasn't respect for orders of a master that held him back. He could have been a master too, if he wanted, if he felt like he needed the validation of being recognized by the others and wanted to jump through hoops set up by Yensid or Aqua or even worse options. He had been named master of the keyblade by the Organization, that was enough. He and Axel had agreed they would help guard the worlds but they wouldn't play into the ranking game. Axel had changed his mind, and Roxas respected that, but he felt no compulsion to join him.

"You never listen when Riku tells you to do something. He's a master too."

"Master, my ass."

"No, master of my..."

"Why do you have to be like this?" Roxas groaned, sliding to the ground.

"Don't get pissy just because you haven't gotten laid in months."

"I didn't visit because Axel told me not to. We've been doing the long distance thing. We've done it before for stretches, like when he and Isa were working on their first book,"Roxas answered Sora's original question, loudly, to change the subject.

"But you've talked on the gummi phone?"

"Every night."

"With video?"

"Is this going back to a weird place you never leave?"

"I live in the gutter now!" Sora confirmed happily, before going back to neutral. "No, it's a serious question. Have you gotten a good look at Axel recently?"

"Same loveable bozo sleeping in a fuzzy zip up adult onesie that makes him look like a Meow Wow  he's always been. "

"You haven't seen him out of the onesie?" At Roxas's exasperated look, Sora defended himself once more. "Legitimate question."

"Some nights I don't even see him take down the hood. He has a voice for Meowaxel."

"And you were griping about the ribbon ceremony. Your sex story is much weirder."

"We don't have phone sex," Roxas's pining despair outweighed his distaste for discussing this kind of thing with Sora who was a dog that never let go of a bone without making a joke about boning. "We have an agreement. He almost crashed a gummi ship once."

"You...while he was driving?" Sora looked impressed and Roxas felt a rare flash of shame.

"New idea?" He pushed through and said the words as if they were a crack of his own.

"Great idea!" Sora's face split into a wide grin and Roxas apologized to Riku internally, the only way he ever did so. Sora grabbed his former Nobody's arm and dragged him to his feet. "Come on. We're going to spy on Axel sparring with Terra. They have a routine. Terra wouldn't deviate from it even knowing people are arriving for the ceremony tonight."

"I am always down to see my baby light someone on fire," Roxas followed Sora down the hill, pliable and, frankly, excited to see Axel as soon as possible.

"Baby? Blech." Sora pulled a face that lasted maybe half a second and rang false while it did, thrilled and supportive as always to see Roxas showing a soft spot, but attempting to play some of Roxas's own attitude back at him.

"Your pet names for Riku are worse...and you should not prove it by listing them." Roxas tacked on the latter part hastily, leaving no room for Sora to start his reign of terror anew.

" There are several riffs on Dream Eater that would make you wish you were as smart as me," Sora huffed, "But that's not what we're here for." He held Roxas back for a second with a thrown out arm, and glanced around the last bend in the hill. Roxas could hear sounds of exertion. Satisfied with what he saw, Sora withdrew the restraining arm in favor of waving his hands like a cheap magician as he ordered Roxas to, "Feast your eyes!"

Roxas ignored Sora's theatrics and stepped around him, only to stop short when he ended up following the other man's order despite himself. His eyes were feasting and there was an entire buffet in the form of Axel, stripped to the waist and hair up in a messy bun with damp loose tendrils stuck to the back of his neck, twisting away to avoid a strike by Terra (in his weird black spandex shirt like always, showing off for who the hell knew or cared) and using the momentum to whirl the rest of the circle and carry out his own blow, the flex and spring back of newly defined muscles Roxas had missed the development of covered by freckled skin that didn't quite make the definition of tan but had been cultivated into a tone more golden than ghost pale translucent on display. The first dish was broad shoulders that had always  been there, but no longer existed just to make clothes hang smoothly like they did on a clothes hanger now that they were attached to the freshly carved meat station--arms that bulged and Roxas was going to declare illegal to ever hide under bunched neon fleece or a thick black coat again. He'd call Axel's new abs the salad bar because he wanted to charge like a bull and then start grazing, but they could also be the drink station because there was definitely a six pack there much more appealing than the beer Hayner had developed a fondness for, and Roxas was remarkably thirsty looking at them. Axel's waist was still comparatively small (Dorito. Delicious. More buffets should include snack food on the side. Jokes weren't over. The man was a snack.) but then there was perhaps the most shocking addition of all had popped into existence below it.

"Bite the buns and have a popsicles for dessert," Roxas whispered under his breath, awed, unable to even be embarrassed by half consciously daydreaming out loud because his eyes had continued their journey and found out there was now meat on the stork (too long to be chicken) drumsticks Axel walked around on.

"Think he's safe from the wind now?" Sora taunted.

"Time for you to leave." Roxas shook himself out of his daze to return fully to the present.

"What?"

"Run up to the castle," Roxas gave the same order in new phrasing as he walked on ahead and waved to Terra, yelling, "Time to leave."

The scene that ensued was bordering on comical as Terra froze, caught off guard and was smacked full in the face with head turning force by the flat of Axel's keyblade, an act that was accompanied by an apologetic, "Oh shit!" and widened eyes that spoke to Axel trying to cut his actions short but being unable to stop the blow, just lessen it. Terra stumbled and Axel reached out to steady him, but then appeared to change his mind or become irrevocably distracted halfway through as Roxas's presence sank in fully. His keyblade disappeared in a shower of sparks, Terra fell, and the lovers ran to be reunited. 

Roxas found himself lifted off the ground like he weighed nothing and his soul left his body, leaving him not responsible for the happily sighed word that he used to greet Axel, "Arms."

[askkrenko]

Krenko’s Guide to Pokemon: Magikarp Line

“A Gyarados appears as a giant sea serpent that can fly for no reason at all, save that it is one terrifying monstrosity and who's going to stop it? You? I don't think so.” ~ Frank Trollman, d20 Pokedex

DESIGN:

Magikarp is a stupid giant koi with hard scales and a long moustache. It’s awful, it’s dumb, it’s useless, and I love it so much. You know Magikarp. They’re pathetic and everywhere and everyone loves them. I’m just going to put the Magikarp song here.

That’s it. It’s so weak that it’s memes but the memes are good. The memes became their own video game, Magikarp Jump. But what really endears people to Magikarp is that unlike other weak, pathetic Pokemon, there’s serious payoff. Magikarp was one of two Pokemon in the original 151 that was awful to the point that you couldn’t actually use it in battle but became a complete monster when it evolved. While Abra was clearly super rare and hard to catch, and Kadabra is super good but reasonable… Gyarados is just something special.

Far more powerful than anything else in its level range, Gyarados is a huge, ferocious, draconic monster that dwarfs everything else in the generation in raw presence. With its long body, huge mouth, and spikes everywhere, Gyarados is just awe-inspiring. Further, the games and anime make sure to take full advantage of this. Gyarados is THE monster. The biggest enemies have it (Lance and, if you didn’t start with Charmander, Blue), and when it first appeared in the Anime in it was this huge, frightening thing that seriously threatened the lives of the heroes in a show where things aren’t usually life-threatening.

I cannot overstate how COOL Gyarados is, but if you’re a fan of Pokemon at all I’m sure you know. I’m sure you know that Gyarados is scarier than most Legendaries, more iconic than most starters, and is just pure, peak badass.

Which is why it’s so disappointing that Mega Gyarados is fat. 

I’m not sure whose decision it was, but bulking up Gyarados for its mega form without lengthening it doesn’t make it look stronger or more powerful, it just looks like it’s swollen and inflamed. In fact, it looks like it’s shorter despite being the same length. I appreciate some aspects of the design, like the huge fins and the change in color pallet, but overall I just look at Mega Gyarados and think ‘this is not as cool as Gyarados.’ Honestly, it’s a problem that a lot of evolutions added later have, because how do you improve on perfection?

Magikarp’s Life by Teahaku

TYPING:

Gyarados is a Water/Flying type, which winds up being very complementary. Yes, Gyarados is extremely susceptible to electric attacks, but we’re talking five resistances and an immunity to only two weaknesses here. Offensively, Water/Flying SHOULD be a great combo, super-effective against six types with no type resisting both, but Gyarados’ only physical flying move is Bounce which gives the opponent the opportunity to switch into something that can catch it better. 

Mega Gyarados is Water/Dark, and while defensively this is much more vulnerable than Water/Flying, it’s important to remember that you don’t have to Mega Evolve. Gyarados can just stay a Gyarados if you’re expecting a move Mega Gyarados would be more susceptible to, and can Mega Evolve later. Offensively, Dark works just fine. It’s only super-effective against two types, but it hits all three types that resist Water, and Gyarados learns Crunch. 

Water/Flying alone is a good type. Water/Dark is solid. But the ability to be a Water/Flying who can turn into a Water/Dark mid-combat is something really special.

Someday... by mark331

STATS:

Gyarados has a good stat lineup with above average defenses, average speed, and 125 Attack. Its only poor stat is special attack, but if you’re going to have one dump stat, it should be one of the attacks. 

Mega Gyarados has more Attack, more Defense, and more Special Defense, honestly just making it really strong and really survivable. 155 is a serious attack stat, and when a pokemon’s lower defense is 109 you know it’s going to be hard to take down. 

This Pokemon is powerful in regular form and a complete beast when it Mega Evolves. No complaints here.

Art by Arvalis, who does a lot of great realistic Pokemon 

ABILITIES:

Gyarados’ abilities, Intimidate and Moxie, are honestly both very good. Intimidate lowers the opponent’s attack by a stage when entering battle, and Moxie raises Gyarados’ attack by a stage if it knocks something out, helping it to sweep. For a normal Gyarados, these are both great abilities and it just depends on whether you want to be a more offensive or defensive build.  If the plan is to go Mega Gyarados, always take Intimidate, as the attack drop will occur before you Mega Evolve. 

Mega Gyarados’ ability is Mold Breaker, which is meta-dependant but also really good. Mold Breaker ignores the defending Pokemon’s ability when you attack it, which is honestly mostly used to use Earthquake on things with Levitate, but there’s a lot of random abilities it shuts off. 

Art by nganlamsong

MOVES:

Gyarados’ best water move is Waterfall, and its speed is enough that the Flinch effect isn’t unreasonable. Making a Gyarados without Waterfall is… weird. Aqua Tail works, too, generally a bit stronger, but the miss chance means they’re about the same power on average.

Gyarados does not have any good Flying attacks. Bounce is a heavy-hitting move with a 30% chance to paralyze, but because it’s a two-turn activation, it gives the opponent the opportunity to switch or use a status move. On the other hand, if you’re building with Leftovers, that two-turn activation also gives Gyarados a chance to heal. Bounce isn’t an inherently bad option, but it’s not nearly as necessary as a secondary STAB move normally is.

Mega Gyarados is Dark instead of Flying, and its best STAB move is Crunch. If you’re going to go Mega, take Crunch. Between that and Waterfall you’ll be able to hit just about anything fine.

And then there’s Earthquake. Earthquake is a powerful attack that works well on Electric, Steel, and Poison types (as well as Rock and Fire, but you have Waterfall for that.) It’s a solid option on Gyarados and, thanks to Mold Breaker, an incredible option for Mega Gyarados. 

Art by BlackSapphireDragon ; is that a thing? Can Sapphires be black?

Gyarados does have other coverage options, like Power Whip, Ice Fang, and Stone Edge, but these are more meta-dependant while Waterfall and Earthquake are going to be good generic answers.

So there you’ve got some attacks. After that it’s up to status moves. Now, there’s a fair number of these that can be decent for a Gyarados, like Rest, Substitute, Taunt, and Roar, but there’s one that really makes Gyarados into a monster: Dragon Dance.

Dragon Dance raises Gyarados’ already impressive Attack, while also increasing its decent but mediocre Speed. With Gyarados’ significant bulk, coupled with Intimidate, it can often afford the turn or two to set up Dragon Dance, and, once it’s going, can act as a serious sweeper. This is true for both regular and Mega Gyarados, and it’s one of the reasons Gyarados has never left the meta.

OVERALL:

Magikarp is memes, Gyarados is awesome. What else is there to say? I wish Mega Gyarados was longer? It’s a great Pokemon line with great designs, a real concept of payoff for leveling up something super weak that gets used multiple times in the series, and then Gyarados is good enough for the big leagues, especially when Mega Evolved. 

I guess if I had one real complaint it’s that Gyarados doesn’t have just a straight Flying physical attack like Drill Peck or Aerial Ace and it doesn’t have the Special to use Hurricane effectively, but Gyarados does just fine without. 

Magikarp Jump! by ArtifexStudio

[revengerevisited]

i found this vanqua fic the other day, it’s only a couple chapters but i like it so far. :3 it does have a ‘creator chose not to add warnings’ label though, so please be cautious. also baby-xemnas aka kotbysleep (nsfw) aka nekokat42 (also nsfw) is a much better vanqua artist than me so please check him out. X’D (heads-up those twitter threads are way longer than you think so make sure you see eeeverything~).

anyway, more wip art below the cut, plus my endless rambling (i talk about 18+ topics, just a warning)—

i’m still working on venqua week and i’ve got 2 more prompts to go, one i haven’t started yet and one i’m halfway done with—

~aaand yeah i’m re-using it for a vanqua pic too... X’D am i lazy, or just resourceful? you decide. ;P

but yeah, both of these pics will have an 18+ version as well. i admit i’m super anxious about posting it next week, as i’ve seen just how absolutely toxic fandom is on twitter. like, you thought tumblr was bad? i’ve spent the last few days preemptively blocking literally hundreds if not thousands of antis just so i can feel a little safer posting my content without some asshat calling me a pedo or telling me to kill myself over cartoons. XU i somewhat worry that i’ve accidentally blocked some people who were just joking around and weren’t actually harassing anyone, but it’s just so hard to tell sometimes. if i’ve accidentally blocked anybody here, just let me know so i can unblock you. :3 (idk why that sentence came out so sinister sounding but i’m legit being sincere X’D).

but seriously, idk when fandom suddenly got such a stick up its ass (around 2016-17 from my guesstimate) and decided aging-up a fictional character by a year or two is such a crime, but i guess that’s just the state of things. :T i could draw vanitas as a centaur or make him blond or whatever and no one cares, but aging him by one year? suddenly big problem! yeah, right. XP like, i know i said every character in kh is 17+ as of khmom (ignoring any weird timeline retcons of course), but heck i could make an honest case for the wayfinder family all being adults. hear me out—

it’s been 13 years since bbs, right? and for 12 of those years, aqua was in the realm of darkness, terra had some awareness while being possessed by xehanort, ven experienced some of sora’s life when he was in a coma, and vanitas was almost certainly in ven/sora’s heart as well, so all four of them could be said to be 31, 33, and 29 respectively. it’s not like their character models were any different when they were young teens as opposed to older teens, so can we really be sure they’re not all 30~ by now? heck, since ven is from the age of fairytales i could say he’s 1000 years old if i wanted too! (psst, it’s almost as if these are all fictional characters living in a fantasy world with time travel and whatnot and their ages are completely arbitrary numbers nomura made up on the spot, numbers which he has retconned before! :P).

now i don’t actually think they’re that old, but if people are gonna hassle me over a goddamn 2-year age difference, i might as well say fuck it and have fun with it, right? ;P it’s not like antis even know what the canon character ages even actually are, like when they try to say that skuld is underage when (assuming she’s subject x) she’d be around 28~ by now, or axel and saïx’s age. (maybe i’ll draw some saïx x skuld art and watch the antis lose their minds. ;P it wouldn’t even have to be nsfw to rile them up).

anyway, i do admit i’m feeling a little burned out on art recently. XP i’ve been trying to get one art piece out per week plus venqua week, and yeah it’s kinda taken its toll. i know this really isn’t anything anyone wants to hear, but i’ve been kinda thinking of moving away from fandom projects to work on my own original work. now, i’m not saying i’m abandoning a heart and a half nor anything as drastic as that! but i have spent like 2 years of my life on it just to get to the halfway mark, and i’m not sure i can spend 2 more doing only that.

i’ve got an original story idea that i’ve been working on-and-off on for the past 7 years or so, and i’m thinking of going back to it again (it does need a pretty big re-write). its main pairing is actually pretty vanqua-ish, now that i think about it. like, imagine the realm of darkness but instead of the heartless it’s infested with demons, and the main characters are the demon-slaying duo of a serious yet kindhearted half-angel and a feral, snarky half-demon. i even aged them up from 14 to 18 so none of my potential fans have to suffer the same anti bullshit that i have. XP

what else can i ramble about... oh, i got these super cute pins for christmas! :D the heartless is by xkirakira, and vanitas and aqua are by maxxmerch. they’re just so cute! X3 i hope everyone had a merry christmas and a happy holiday! i’ll see you guys later. ^3^ 

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*looks around sheepishly* ó3ò alright... confession time. spoilers for a heart and a half for the rest of this post—

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sooo~ i’ve kinda hinted at this before, but yeah i’ve always planned on adding a sex scene to a heart and a half; when i started writing back in 2018 i hadn’t realized how hostile fandom had become compared to only a few years ago, and it worries me that some readers might drop the fic because of it, or be angry with me over the underage aspect. :(

idk, i could go on about how i just wanted to explore every aspect of a romantic relationship, or how other disney/square enix characters married or had kids young (ariel, sarah hawkins, héctor, claudia strife, possibly jasmine), or how attempting to apply real-world rules to a videogame fantasy setting is inherently silly and pointless, but really it’s just ‘cause i love vanitas and aqua to bits and i just wanted to write a cute and funny mild sex scene between them (this fic is rated mature, not explicit, so much less graphic than confection affection), and at the end of the day they are just fictional characters, after all.

i guess all i can hope for is that i’m a skilled enough writer to pull it off in a believable way, and that my audience won’t be too put off by it. >_> i know vanitas and aqua have technically only known each other for about 2 months so it might not be ‘realistic’ for them to go so far into a relationship so soon, but i think it’s important to remember that ultimately this is a romantic fairytale, and other canon disney couples haven’t seen nearly as deeply into each other’s hearts as vanitas and aqua have (and this video also helped me feel better about it).

i also wanted to finish that nsfw venqua fic i started a few months back, it’s set just before the mark of mastery so yes ven would be 16. i suppose it’s a way of testing the waters to see what kind of reception i’d get (hopefully positive) before i get to that part of a heart and a half. i was also thinking of including some of the uh, ‘keyblades as erogenous zones’ aspect from this terraquaven fic as well... w-why are you looking at me like that?! it’s funny! *sweats nervously* o3o’

in all honesty, i’m probably just overthinking all this (which, knowing me, is almost a guarantee >_<) and i should just *ahem* let my heart be my guiding key, and just write what i want to write without worrying about it all the time. i just get so anxious so easily... buuut that’s not really news to anyone, now is it? ;P well, i think that’s the end of my endless ramble, thanks for reading if you got this far. X’D and i really hope i didn’t actually upset anybody about a heart and a half. ;_; i just felt like i needed to vent a little, but don’t worry about me, i’m doing fine. anyway, i really should stop typing and get back to work on venqua week, sooo... bye! X3

[alarawriting]

All about “A Very April Christmas”

I’ve talked about “April’s Dream House” before, and posted part of the story (which is still not done, but I got 1800 words done today and it’s 3 am so I’m closing down for the night) last year for Inktober, but I want to talk about it.

The problem here is that “April’s Dream House” was created to be an animated show. I was trying to come up with an Adult Swim-style comedy where all the characters are female, because Aqua Teen Hunger Force and some others, all the characters are male. (I pulled my punches at the end and added one male character.) This was back before Robot Chicken; nowadays people would alsmot certainly think this was inspired by Robot Chicken, but it’s actually inspired by Toy Story. Toy Story, you see, is the story of toys owned by a little boy. The people who made the movie are so incapable of imagining the play life of a little girl, they gendered a baby doll who was a little girl’s favorite doll as male. (This pretty much never happens. Male baby dolls are rare to begin with. A little girl who decided her favorite baby doll was a boy is possible, but unlikely.)

Those of you who were little girls and played with dolls probably remember that, rather than the demure tea parties we’re always shown having in media, we were making soap operas, and depending on how much we knew about sex, sometimes they were downright raunchy soap operas. “April’s Dream House”, unlike Toy Story, isn’t about the lives of the toys independent of their owner, and their need to hide that they can move around; it’s more about the lives of the toys as played with by a rather strange little girl, who is occasionally referred to as “God” but never actually appears in the series.

So a lot of the humor is visual. April’s in a traffic jam, but her vehicle is the size of a Barbie minivan, like a foot tall, and she’s stuck behind a line of Hot Wheels cars. April’s younger sister Madison, a teen doll who’s about 10 inches, has a 6 inch Mandalorian action figure for a boyfriend. Cherry Blossom, the G3 My Little Pony ripoff, is trying to romance a realistic horse figurine. You get the picture. Or rather, you don’t, because I’m not an artist and all I can do is prose.

I’m going to post photographs of the toys that the main characters are based on or inspired by.

It’s Barbie. We all know what Barbie looks like. The joke with April is that she is insanely talented and brilliant, because of all the jobs Barbie’s had as a doll -- so she really has been a veterinarian, a rocket scientist, a firefighter, a detective, etc., as well as a model and actress. But April is such a mega-bitch, she can’t keep a job, so she’s had to take in housemates -- and, given her bitchiness, for considerably less money than the property would otherwise be worth for rental.

This is Sasha, a Bratz doll. Sheonte of the Divazz isn’t literally based on her the way April is based on Barbie; I took inspiration from the general style of the Bratz. Sheonte’s arrogant and vain, but she’s in general a better human being than April.

This is a doll from Monster High -- Im guessing a mummy of some sort. Catrina is even less based on this than Sheonte and the Divazz are based on the Bratz. The idea behind the Weargirls is that they are all were-animals. So Catrina is a were-cat, Batrice is a were-bat and also a vampire, etc. Catrina was originally supposed to be Latina of no specific origin, and when pressed for an origin the makers of her product line decided Mexican... which is bizarre because La Catrina is the Mexican symbol of the Day of the Dead, how everyone, rich and poor, dies in the end. That would be a weird thing to name your kid if you were Mexican. This is deliberate on my part because it’s the kind of stupid mistake toy execs make.

As a child I misread the label on my Hello Kitty doll and thought it said Kelly Kitty, so that’s where Kelly gets the name. (Or Kerry. It’s interchangeable, she’ll answer to either.) Unlike Hello Kitty, my vision of Kelly Kitty includes a mouth, and brown “fur” rather than white. Kelly is probably the best person in this household, but admittedly the bar is low.

Though I am an MLP fan, it’s strictly G4 -- I always found the more horse-like ponies from previous gens to be creepy looking. Cherry Blossom is generically based on G3 ponies, but I discovered to my shock today that there really was a G3 pony named Cherry Blossom, so maybe if I ever do get to make this a show, I’ll have to change the name.

Penelope Peapod is the inspiration for Emily Egg. The size differentials here are a source of a lot of the humor. Emily is a 7 inch baby doll. April is an 11 inch fashion doll. So Emily is two thirds of April’s size, but proportioned like an infant.

Lovey is not actually based on any particular toy I or anyone I know has owned. I just wanted an old, somewhat worn out, plush bassett hound who looks sad all the time.

Doktor Zapp, on the other hand, is based on a very specific Playmobil figure, that my albino son was very fond of because he, too, wanted to be a mad scientist, back then. (Now he wants to tell stories through art, which I suspect involves some of the same skills. :-)) He’s a Playmobil figure. In the story, it’s his leg, not his arm, that’s cybernetic.

I’m hoping I can get the story out tomorrow sometime, but tomorrow’s a cleaning day, so no promises.

[monkey-network]

Who is Best Girl in Konosuba?

Welcome back, fellow weebs, to Media & Entertainment Developers Essentials Lessons Book. Today on MEDELB, we’re discussing the question that existed since one of the most disastrous years in the 21st century, 2017. A question that dives into one the greatest anime of all time. Yes, even better than Dragon Ball Z, Cowboy Bebop, and Steven Universe. I am talking about KonoSuba: God's Blessing on this Wonderful World! Today we’re discussing: who is best girl? Aqua? Darkness? Megumin? Your father?

Now it’s important to know that KonoSuba is genius because it supports judicial simplication, a professional term that I can break down for you. Judicational Sampling is the idea that a free society does not impinge on the actual taxing benefits of localized source banks. KonoSuba is genius because it made a lot of money... to make more KonoSuba. It is not Disney, whom is the greatest bottom in the Hollywood industry, but in truth I wouldn’t want it to be. Sometimes, genius is fine where it is and you shouldn’t question it. There are people who question why KonoSuba originated as a light novel, and those people are to be shunned because they also believe Harry Potter is worth reading, straight people are bad, and that ranch dressing is good on pizza. You know, the alt-right and we have enough problems on our hands as it is. And as the great Joe Biden once said,

But today’s focus will be on discussing on who is best girl and how that affects our society. And if you are one of the people unaware of this discussion, then perhaps you should realize that any comments you have contradict themselves and function as your self-righteous wannabe soapbox. In short, you’re acting like a su crit, so please read history. Because ultimately, I am a proud KonoSuba kinnie and member of the intellectual anime community founded by the General Rebecca Sugar. I would appreciate it if you would recognize the context and respect. It. Because ultimately again, I sent you all a respectful anon about this earlier today which you ignore and this sounds, smell, looks, feels, tastes... like Racism. But back to KonoSuba, let us discuss Megumin.

Now, Megumin is a good person. She can create explosions which are big.... explosions, this represents her pride. She wears red which is the color of your blood, so that could mean satanic blood pacts. Megumin represents the resolve in critical deductive intelligent smart reasoning where blind subservience has been... eradicated. But what is blind, subservience? For a simple understanding, think of it as the cooked Molotov of slice of life shows or some other perceptively anodyne prosaic internationalized statement.

Overall, Megumin is a short person so choosing her as best girl is pedophilia and if you try to tell me otherwise, you are a nazi troll and deserve the chamber. And if you agree with me, don’t speak if you’re Afro-American like myself. Because this is just a cartoon for kids and you’re complaining too much about it. Or am I?

Next, we have Darkness, which is a force parallel to light and is also used in the form of attacks in the Kingdom Hearts universe. Those who follow the path of Darkness will usually gain untold power at the expense of something of their former selves, so this naturally explains why she is an explicit masochist. Then again, her real name is Lalatina Dustiness Ford which explains a lot more. We continue asking who she is, and what she is, but nobody is asking how Darkness is. Because looking like the poster child for Aryan superiority with her blonde hair and blue eyes, she isn’t capable of being best girl because that would mean the guillotine for you and I love you too much to not let that happen. She is overall the better character for inventing good things like the dominatrix, but she cannot be best girl because she is a good character and supports capitalism. I too support capitalism but I hate people who think capitalism is alright, if that makes sense.

Aqua is a better contender for best girl because I was fortunate enough to see less porn of her. Kazuma notably has called her worthless, but Kazuma is what internet users would call an braincel. He played video games, so obviously he isn’t one to be speaking on value. Aqua was able to survive getting vored by a frog multiple times, so clearly she is more cunning than the average E-girl. Aqua is able to make the most of her situation and entertain people with watersports.... and tricks. Kingdoms Hearts wishes it had a character named Aqua as cool as this one, but then again, you’d have to wait 4 more years for KH4 so what life would you have? She is mostly blue, which is a color, and I prefer it when anime has color. If it doesn’t, it’s racist. As the wise Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez once said this last November, 

This Disproves Objective Analysis.

She represents the element of the holy flood thesis joining the narrative tripling in subsequent disagreement that there any factual basis to the truth that Kazuma is wrong but because there’s simple authentic observation there is no objective truth. Plus she cries a lot, and if there’s anything I learned from Steven Universe, it’s that if you cry good enough, you can topple entire totalitarian empires. Except for General Rebecca Sugar, because she can smell your fear and absorb it accordingly. She is basically the Mother Teresa of animation. Again, great contender. But we have to consider the others so let’s move on.

Next, we have Wiz. 

...

...

Next, we have Sylvia from their first and latest movie. It’s as they say, if it is new, it is better. I believe Sylvia is more than the sum of their parts, they are caring and charismatic and can turn into a powerful creature. None of the other characters can turn into a powerful creature, and that is why they possess internalized misogyny. The slimy veneer of quasi empiricism can be a very disgusting tool for nefariously slipping in one’s own rotten viewpoint or value. One that you know might otherwise be c̷h̵a̷l̸l̸e̴n̴g̴e̸d̴ ̵a̸s̴ ̸r̵i̷t̸u̵a̷l̵i̴s̵t̷i̴c̵a̷l̶l̵y̶ ̶s̷u̸p̸e̸r̶l̴a̷t̴i̶v̵e̸ ̵o̶r̸ ̷p̶e̵r̵h̷a̵p̵s̵ ̷y̵o̴u̸ ̸t̵h̴i̴n̸k̵ ̷t̴h̶a̶t̶ ̶w̷͍͍̠͉͚̦̦͛̔̓͗̏ā̵̛̬̜̂͋ṙ̸̨̐̌̈̅ ̸̦͔̣̮͔͋̊̑̕i̷̛͎̽̅́͑s̴̠̩̟̝͙̍̏̀͌̑̕ ̷͚͔̦̜̜͊̾̽͊͂j̸̡̨̣̙̮̓͘ų̵̣͚̹̱̐͌̎̑̈̎̆s̶̢͚̺͉̰͂̄̉̾͑ț̵̤̭͔̲̲̮̀͒̏̐̓ ̵̡̙̟̖͐́͋͝p̷̙̳̣̫͍̬͗̽͒̀e̸̻̯̽̆̇́͑͒a̵̡̞̣̫̫̯̰̿͛̅̄̅͂c̷̀͐̊͗͝ͅē̵̠͕̫̙ ̶̻̼̳͑̓̈́̿͐ŵ̷̼̝̣͇̞̞̺̍͋i̸̠͓̪̣̜͍̘͊͂̀̄t̸̟̣͉̼͑̒͜h̵̥̗̲̩̑̏́͜ ̵̡̠͉̝̾̆̌̇͐e̷̢̨̼̺͖̒̈́̃̃̆x̸̟̟͂́̄̍͛́̄t̴͖̣̼̫͇͐͋̆̽̎̚r̷͎̙̯͈͉̲̚a̵̩͎̥̺̮͂̀̃̚ ̸̠̜̣̥̜͍̠̌ṡ̴̢̡̐̽̅̃̇ͅt̴̖̣̹͙̙̼̟̔̐̚͝͝ĕ̵͔͍̤̼̂͌̐̑p̸̡̹̪̻͔̬͕̃̚s̸̫̙̈͛̉̋̉͝ ̶͔͚̽͝y̸̨̘͎̠͕̺̽̉̃o̶̜̥̺͔͑̏ͅu̵̓͜ ̴̨̦͉̀̊͊̓̌̃f̶̢̮̱̳̖̟̼̰͒̊̈͜i̸̯̼̫̩͚̇̉l̸̢̢̯̗̠̪̹͈͎͚̬̭̮̣̬̿̈́̍͘t̸͕͕̮̻̭̰̬͎̻̰̬̙̟̀́̍̋h̷̡̡͎͙̘̩̞̤̰̳͖͙̺͈̅̓͆ͅy̴̡̢̳̤̮̘̻͚̲̪̳̭̗̙͈̽́̔̄̓͊̅̍̓͗͑̓̈̿͝,̵̛͙͚̒͐̍̅̓͗͌̕ ̷̢̡͚̮̜͚͈̖̥̳̹̦̙͈̄́́͛̈́̈́ͅt̸̛̼̯̯̠̰͓̩͍̺̊̽̔͂͑̕ë̵̢̖͕̰͕̜̹̰̫͙̣̩͈́͐͐̿̆̽͌̓̀͐̊̑̀̆͗̕͜ͅͅs̴̢̡̜̯̀͋͛͒͐̌̓̕t̸̠̳̱̙̃̓̽̈̔͗̏̋̓̈̏ ̷̤͉́̽͊̕̚��̧̧̲̜͔̫̤̯t̸̘̲̼̜̱̿̿͑̽́̈́͋̔͘u̶͍̞̜͛͜b̸̛̯̙̼̜͙̏̓̄̽͆̏͘͝ẹ̷̛̉̑̂ ̵̡̡̞͓̱̤̞̫͛̎̆͘͝b̸̡̡̟̫̱́̔̓̋͗̃̊ǫ̶͍͕̼̥̳͕͖̥͈̼̳̎̒͋ͅŕ̶̢̨̧̛̞̝̰̠͍̥̓͛͗͛̃̏̂ņ̷͔̞̜̟̱̮͍͎̹̬̠̰̳̌͠͝,̸̙͕͓̟̥̜͛ ̶̛͓͊̉̑̍̀̿̽̅̓̂͝͝a̷̧͕͎̜̮̟͚̮̦̜̝̺̿̈́̍̀͂̔͝ņ̴̛̰̮̟̤̭̘̲̠̹̲̟̎̉͂̃̈́̅̂͒͑͠͝ͅͅṱ̶̛̥̘̬̖̳̤͈̟̫̻̘̻̅́̿̓͂̒͂̓̏̐̔̈́̊̊͜į̷̧̱͚̱͉̲̺̬͕̙̀̅̔̆-̷̫͈̳̩͔̠͕͖̹̲̓͊̂̅̈́̔̈́̔̍̎̒̇͌́̃͘͜͜S̶̘̻̱͖̗̠̩̥̝̺̻͕̪̯̊͒͆̽͐́̀͠͝ͅJ̸̨̝̲̬͕͈̘̞̠̱͖̮̒͑̈́̎̃̄̍̃̚͘̚͝ͅͅẂ̸̡̖͉̞͍̙̲͈͈̜̼̪̯̱͇͉̋́͋̎́͗̿̋̈́͂̈́̽̉̚ ̴̣͓̼̟̼̬̙̜͈̰̼̼̖̣̆̅̋̽̕͝͠C̷̙͉̭̜̭̞̝̲̳̰̊̓̃͝E̵̤̟̮͠N̵̨̢̼̱̺̭̦̟̳̪̻̘̿͛̀͜ͅT̸̹͚̆͆͐̊̀̏͑̓̈͝ͅR̸̛̮̲͇̼̻͇̹̙̞̤͎̗̾̊̈́͊͗̋͑̅̿̓̐̔̔͝͝ͅI̵̧̩͕̼̱͚͈̻͎̮̝̖̰̐̑͛̎̂̃̇̇̀̈́́̃̕͠S̶̞̘͔̈́̒̑͒́T!! But, Sylvia is dead, so as much as I wanted to consider, they can’t be best girl so we must move on. 

Next we have Yunyun. It is said that she “forms a rivalry with Megumin as an excuse to create a friendship.” Now we could call her a beta cuckquean, but that would imply you have a life outside a human being. As our current president once said, 

I’m never a Trump supporter myself, but this is wisdom I can kinda get behind regardless. Sure he ghost wrote this, but not all wisdom comes from the mouth. However, Yunyun represents the normalcy of KonoSuba, and as such could be a nice change of pace for those too dependent on the definitive waifu. She has big jiggly boobs, sure, but have you ever considered that her boobs have, personality? A lot of otakus and bronies have not been understanding this as of late, as I feel we’ve overlooked something far more important: Tactile anime feel. We can stare at breasts all we wish, but how realistic are her proportions? You can say it’s fiction all you want, and you’d be right, but if I’m envious that the fiction women have better boobs than mine, my opinion is now better than yours. What I’m getting at is that Yunyun is like a ghost, you try to find her, you search for them, and you look for them, and you try to find them, but you can’t find them, thus they are empty handed.

The last contender is Kazuma, who is the villain of KonoSuba because he doesn’t act like the typical isekai protagonist. He isn’t like Kirito from SAO who was almost involved in incest or Sonic the Hedgehog who believed stalking people is okay as long as you’re alone. As Luigi Mario once said, “It is common, but not too common.” He spits in the face of a critically stupid people because he believes in true gender equality. Those who don’t believe in this philosophy are mostly women, and that’s okay. He must clearly be best girl because he is asserted with the phrase “Give and take”. Most people complain about 11 hour Youtube videos, but they can hardly spend three hours overthrowing their bastardizing governments. Which is why Ligma is not running in the 2020 presidential election, because you keep putting your time in the wrong cubby hole. KonoSuba is a complicated anime, and Kazuma is the crux of that complication. So the sooner you can understand Kazuma, the more you’ll understand KonoSuba; that is why he’s considerably best girl. Otherwise, go play World of Warcraft like the mainstream loving psuedo-intellectual toesucking simp that you are.

To conclude, KonoSuba has a lot to think about for a smart people. Choosing best girl is not about finding your interest, it’s about avoiding callout culture because you have shit taste. If there’s enough controversy, I avoid it unless it can benefit me in the long and short term. Clearly Aqua is the choice for when you yourself have little to prove, Yunyun understandably for when you have nothing to gain, Kazuma for when you want to feel better about yourself. In any case, if you are not horny on main, you are probably the reason Trump got elected because you are yourself sexually fascistic. Sorry, I don’t make the rules and ergo this post was never made for you. Real, in-depth nitty gritty perspective, prescriptive criteria for denationalization context barriers are still alive on the internet. Ultimately, we must decide on whether or not this was all worth it. Simplicity is hard to strive for, but that is why people only use five percent of another’s argument. Or else we’re fans of the She-ra reboot, always over-complicating the idea that kinship will save the day in the end and thinking the creator didn’t copy the great works of famous Shark Tale actor Martin Scorsese. You know? Tankies. I myself have made a long post expressing this complicated issue, but then again, I am a chronophobe. I fear time and I would appreciate if you wouldn’t timeshame me, you potential ablest. So in truth, you choose who is best girl because you are valid. Not more than I but still.

Thank you for reading my post. If you liked this essay, please comment. It’s free. If you liked my paypal, please donate. It’s free. Sharing this would be highly appreciated. It’s free. Dollar Dash Share is offering a free shaving earbud for the first ten sign ups when you use the promo code, ‘MNKY’. Make sure to try out their Curiosity streaming service and use the 5000 silver to unlock new warriors or maps. Thank you for reading............ KonoSuba.

[laine-o]

who are some artists u take inspiration from / are some of ur inspirations? love ur art btw :)

Wow I’m so sorry it took me awhile to get back to you anon! This was a hard one. I haven’t thought of my inspirations lately since they have changed a bit. I tried to keep these relevant more to my anime art since that’s what I’m more known for, but some are influences on more of my original art that I hope someday I’ll feel brave enough to share with you all.

From left to right, top to bottom.

CLAMP (Magic Knight Rayearth) - they were the reason I started drawing manga/anime artwork at all back in early 2000′s for me. The only “shoujo” artists on this list, I was really taken by the eyes they drew at the time and it still can be seen a little bit today, though I’ve really tried to steer myself away from the large pointed eyes with thick lashes and elongated bodies that plagued my art for a long time. I’ll always love their compositions, use of color and just how they use marker.

Yusuke Murata (Street Fighter fan art) - known for Eyeshield21 and One Punch-Man. This man can draw anything. His sense of anatomy, foreshortening and movement is breathtaking. I love the lighting and rendering as well. He also has a knack for creating really original faces and he doesn’t have the “same-face” syndrome problem. Just top-notch. I don’t aim to be as shonen in style as him, but I hope to start being able to add more dynamic poses into my work.

Kyohiko Azuma (Yotsubato!) - known for Azumanga Daioh and Yotsubato! I really love the comedy and slice of life genres lately. I love softer styles and I really adore the more simplistic approach he has to his character design that really allows the slice of life genre to shine through his art. Despite the simplicity, it still is very anatomically technical. It’s simple, but warm and effective and very soft. His skill in backgrounds as well is phenomenal. I think it’s a whole atmosphere he creates and the story he tells in his illustrations that I would love to apply to my own work if I can. I also related a lot to an interview where he stated he struggles blending little Yotsuba into the world he created because she’s so different stylistically from all the characters, so it’s a lot of fun and helpful to see how he accomplishes this throughout the manga and the panels.

Masashi Kishimoto (Naruto) - of course one of my biggest influences due to all the SasuSaku I draw. I think his style is very effective. It’s also I think more on the simpler side actually (if you compare it to CLAMP and Murata’s). But it’s so dynamic and full of strong composition and memorable character designs. I really appreciate how by his influence, I never really stopped drawing thanks to the characters, Sasuke and Sakura, that he created that had such an impact on me.

Xia Da (Song of the Long March AKA Choukakou) - This one is a manhua artist. Her inking and watercolor artwork is absolutely phenomenal. Definitely someone I look up to when I’m inking my own pieces, I would love to be at her level of skill someday. Primarily an inspo for inking.

Kamome Shirahama (Atelier of Witch Hat) - another artist with phenomenal inking skills that I really admire. She’s also really good at drawing children! But I definitely believe she can draw anything, the fact that she has crossed the barrier to illustrate comic covers for both DC and Marvel is just incredible to me and a testament to how much skill she possesses. Primarily an inspo for inking.

Kozue Amano (Aria) - Known for Aqua, Aria, and Amanchu (lots of A’s!). Her ability to design precious soft characters, gorgeous scenery, and write a beautiful and gentle slice of life fantasy tale has always made her one of my absolute favorites. I absolutely love how she colors her works.

Adachitoka (Noragami) - this is a team who does characters and background art. It’s not a secret that I love watercolor. I also love the movement and action and fighting scenes from this manga. The fact that this team is female and broke through with a popular shonen series is simply amazing. I hope to be as good as they are in drawing figures and in watercolor someday.

James Gurney (Dinotopia) - the master of creating fantasy worlds and making it look like it EXISTS with his painting skills. His “Color and Light” book is an absolute staple (I have it always ready as reference) and it’s a must if you want to give your lighting that more realistic feel. I think my love of lighting really came from growing up with the Dinotopia series. He is always constantly sharing his wisdom as well on his website and twitter and just an amazing and inspiring person for generations of artists.

Makoto Shinkai (Kimi no Na Wa) - This movie’s aesthetics (especially the lush backgrounds), surrealism, and existentialism really spoke to me. I adore the starry skies and heavens and clouds. Screencaps of his movies fill my phone as a quick reference whenever I’m rendering some complex lighting or trying to create some sort of composition with the sky.

Studio Ghibli/Hayao Miyazaki (Kiki’s Delivery Service) - nothing really needs to be said especially given my love for the details in all the movies, the fantastic scenes involving flying in the sky, the gorgeous backgrounds, and the delicious food. Always a good choice to use as a reference for anything with nature or even cluttered cozy houses and rooms and greenhouses. It’s still a desire to delve more into world building for me and I’ll be using these movies for reference. I also keep tons of their artwork in my phone as reference.

Satoru Takizawa (Legend of Zelda, Breath of the Wild) - Known for his work with Twilight Princess and Breath of the wild. You know where I’m going with this - he is the MASTER of ambient lighting. I love his rough and loose painting style that I wish I could achieve someday, but I still have a tendency to over-render. A great resource for learning how to world-build and for concept art.

Andrew Loomis - anatomy and figure drawing master. At the end of this list, but not the least important by a long shot. His book I think is not the most beginner friendly in terms of seeing basic shapes and breaking down the form (I think his construction is still more on the complex side), but it’s a good place to start and keep grinding until it “makes sense.” It took me years, but once it started clicking, I have him to thank for it because my anatomy was an absolute mess because of my background of starting from CLAMP’s art style. Buy his book and make it your bible. Attend figure drawing classes. If you want to illustrate people no matter how simple, you must make studying anatomy a part of your process.

Lastly - some original artists to check out who I like the inking, watercolor skills, and concepts of that closely align with my interests for my own original art.

meyoco - twitter, instagram

maruti_bitamin - twitter, instagram, tumblr

Qinniart - twitter, instagram

Some mangaka honorable mentions -

Takeshi Obata (Death Note, Bakuman)

Kaoru Mori (Emma, Otoyomegatari)

Satsuki Yoshino (Barakamon)

This was super long, I apologize, but it’s something I’m passionate about. I love art to pieces. I think a lot of what I admire is very technical - anatomy and lighting. I think my influences also reflect my aim to be more proficient at watercolor and inking. And lastly, world-building, fantasy/cosmos, and background art. I think a lot of what I really love though, is color and lighting and that’s found within any of these artists. :)

Thanks for the question anon! You allowed me to geek out on art for about an hour while I wrote this out.

[ilikelookingatthings]

Barbie’s Duality and Untapped Role Model Potential

this particular essay by Clarisa Calderon-Figueroa

When I say Barbie, what pops into your head? A plastic doll with blond locks? The color Pink? Princesses? Glitter? Gender segregated toy sections at Target? Ripped off limbs? Maybe personal memories of playing with Barbie yourself scroll across the back of your eyelids. Or a sense of shallow distaste as you think of plastic surgery, removed ribs, and righteous complaints about body image. Barbie is a household name that has been steadily embedding itself in the world's collective consciousness since “1959,  with her vast array of careers that stem from CEO to astronaut, but who simultaneously is more associated with the lyrics "I'm a blond bimbo girl" by the band "Aqua" ( Dockterman "A Barbie for Every Body") than the female empowerment message she goes out of her way to promote. The collective consciousness pulls "that age-old move" of "'demeaning' a powerful woman" and undercutting Barbie’s influence and the values she actually promotes by "'reducing' her to her appearance." ( Dockterman "Wonder Woman Breaks Through"). She is unfairly accused of selling a sexist, objectifying message under the veneer of empowering girls, stifling the untapped potential this icon has to teach children and adults the value of feminine traits.

 Barbie has been accused of being inappropriate because of her body shape; on the surface these concerns are valid. According to a journal Barbie's design had been closely based on the "Lilli dolls, designed by O & M Hausser created in 1955…" which were "... racy..." dolls meant to be "… suggestive…" "… gag gifts..." that "… were not intended for children"(Hunter et al 138). She supposedly had the male gaze built into her and was repackaged for young girls. A 2006 study found that"girls exposed to Barbie at a young age were more likely to worry about their weight" (Dockterman "A Barbie for Every Body"). However, the study fails to consider that Barbie is not the only doll children would be playing with in real life. Some of those dolls have even more severe proportions than Barbie with a less wholesome image. Match up a Veterinarian Barbie with her "5-inch waist", "11.5-inches of height" and a "bust of 5-inches" against a Bratz doll with their "pouty lips", "bare midriff-baring tops", and half the waist with 7/10th the bust size(Hess). The disproportionate proportions winner is the Bratz doll. The study also proclaims that Barbie wouldn't be realistic if she was scaled up to actual human size, but Barbie is not meant to be scaled up and has never claimed to be realistic.

Barbie has tried to address the criticisms about her proportions by creating the "petite, tall" and "curvy"( Dockterman "A Barbie for Every Body") barbie body molds and with her worldwide reach, she can soon normalize the doll shapes from a young age since as of yet little girls still "snicker" at curvy barbie" which was noted by Tania Missad who had watched the test marketing of these new body types. If Barbie was the source of these body image issues kids would not snicker at different barbies but while she is not responsible she does have the ability to influence kids, especially with live examples of powerful female role models "Beyonce, Christina Hendricks" and "feminist leaders like Lena Dunham" with their "un-Barbie-like figures onscreen, fueling a movement that promotes body acceptance"(Dockterman 46). Barbie has the unique enduring appeal that has been picked up by generations of children; soon her different body types will recalibrate at the new normal.

 Instead of blaming the society and the media that girls are exposed to daily, the blame is thrust on to Barbie even though "she's just a body" that "society can project on"(Dockterman "A Barbie for Every Body") and no one tries to blame boy toys like G.I. Joe of being a bad influence on young lads despite being the hyper-masculine ideal. Barbie is not even the only female icon that has her appearance dragged out to ridicule and used to distract from their actual accomplishments. The superhero Wonder Woman was sculpted from the mind of a "feminist, psychologist and… inventor of the lie-detector test..." "William Moulton Marston" in "1941" as "icon for little girls". Wonder woman's message of empowerment became so iconic the "U.N." dubbed her the "Honorary Ambassador for the Empowerment of Women and Girls..". Unfortunately, her position was rescinded due to a "petition objecting to "a large-breasted white woman of impossible proportions..."; dismissing her as a "... epitome of a 'pinup'" (Dockterman "wonder woman breaks through"). Wonder Woman has been around since Batman and Superman and yet she has had only "one" film compared to the "'Batman's' nine" and "'Superman's seven". People even criticized Gal Gadot as Wonder Woman, not for her acting talent but for the size of her breasts, according to an interview mentioned in the Wonder Woman Breaks Through article. Evidence that the phenomenon of society judging the looks of females and using them as excuses to undercut the messages those ladies represent live people and imaginary characters.

 Another complaint lobbied about the Barbie brand’s narrow view of positive, cheerful girl power. It's true, Mattel could be promoting one type of image of what being a girl is like, but the fact that Barbie from her inception has "inspired resistance" to even her own "script" (Weida el al [103]17-31) and has inspired conversations about what it means to be a lady. Even when Barbie seems one note she can be used to articulate a change. Barbie, as mentioned before with the body molds, has adapted to these arguments; just as feminism has grown and changed over time. Barbie has even purposefully used start a ripple of change for young girls to become interested “in the field of computers and information technology” by filling the gap caused by the “lack of well-known female role models” with the Barbie computer science "coding program"(Martincic et al 7).

 The classic Barbie doll is often accused of promoting a shallow, stereotypical view of the female gender. Its true Barbie is blonde, pretty, fashion-obsessed, loves glitter, and associated with the term princess, however, seeing these as a negative from the get go is sexist in and of itself. If someone is blonde they shouldn’t be taken less seriously than a brunette. If their preferred color is pink it doesn't mean they should be judged more than if their favorite is blue. Enjoying clothes isn’t inherent shallow as it is a method expressing yourself; and glitter is gender-neutral. By associating these feminine aspects with negative light it can lead to dismissing other traits deemed as feminine, such as kindness or compassion, as weak. If girls don't respect those aspects how will they get boys to respect those aspects? Barbie takes those stereotypical girly aspects people have been conditioned over time to avoid and proclaims there is nothing to be ashamed of.

 Even the idea of princesses has become synonymous with being a damsel in distress; a passive prize to be won. In reality, princesses are leaders and have " 'spanned' nearly all cultures and time periods…" and have a "myriad representations"(Weida el al 17-31) of what princesses can be like. The damsel image can immediately be changed when you change the princess to an active main character who drives the story. Barbie has a large association with princesses due to her movie franchise that almost slaps the term princess or mention of a royal in a majority of her films that I am a big fan of because Barbie is always the main character and the goals of the movies don't revolve around romance. Barbie's overly pink girly image is associated with the damsel stereotype which also means when Barbie breaks that stereotype over and over again it will stick. Barbie draws in little girls with her pretty dresses and sparkly animation and can inspire and teach little girls' leadership by normalizing the idea that guys can "… play subordinate roles in comparison with the female characters" (Änggård) since Barbie is the active problem solver.

 Barbie as a female-focused brand explores scenarios where girls are the central focus without the expectations that they'll be brushed aside in favor of boy characters which can happen in more neutral, family-oriented. Slipping in an accidentally positive preference bias toward guys. Eva Änggård had noted that while the girls had included boys in their stories, none of the boys included girls in their own stories. The boys seemed to associate "The presence of female figures…to romance" which caused "teasing" from other boys. It had gotten to the point at least "two girls" had become "angry because they were not allowed to play in the boys' stories" so they "wrote their own stories" (Änggård) that used the themes the boys had favored. Kids reflect the society around them so the fact that the boys dismissed the girls entirely from the story is a micro-example of what happens on a large scale around the world. Barbie can fight those expectations due to her wide media presence. If the media would stop focusing on the flaws Barbie is ironing out and talk about how entertaining her shows or toys are, or the lessons she actually endorses, Barbie might teach the guys who aren't just forced to watch with their sisters the leadership qualities and friendship lessons.

 Barbie has a wide reach not just as a toy, but through her "39" ("List of All Barbie Movies Online") movies and TV shows including Barbie Life in the Dreamhouse. Barbie has computer games and clothing lines. Barbie appeals to nostalgic adults with their collector Barbies; using that connection to prompts those adults to introduce Barbie to their kids. Barbie has an online presence that includes a motion capture Barbie YouTube channel, the Facebook page, or her twitter account ("Barbie YouTube"). Her worldwide appeal is already strong so if the instinct to brush aside girl-oriented media and jump on every minor flaw Barbie has was curbed, she could influence young children when they are the most impressionable to accept many wonderful traits.

 💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖

 Cite

Änggård, Eva. "Barbie Princesses and Dinosaur Dragons: Narration as a Way of Doing Gender." Gender & Education, vol. 17, no. 5, Dec. 2005, pp. 539–553. EBSCOhost, doi: 10.1080/09540250500192777.

"Barbie." YouTube, YouTube, www.youtube.com/c/barbie/videos.

Dockterman, Eliana. "A Barbie for Every Body. (Cover Story)." TIME Magazine, vol. 187, no. 4, Feb. 2016, pp. 44–51. EBSCOhost, search.ebscohost.com/login.aspx?direct=true&db=a9h&AN=112553378&scope=site.

Dockterman, Eliana. "Wonder Woman Breaks Through." TIME Magazine, vol. 188, no. 27–28, Dec. 2016, pp. 98–105. EBSCOhost, search.ebscohost.com/login.aspx?direct=true&db=a9h&AN=120303854&scope=site.

Hess, Amanda. "Leave Barbie Alone! She's Not the Skinniest Doll on the Block." Slate Magazine, Slate, 5 Feb. 2014, slate.com/human-interest/2014/02/barbies-not-the-skinniest-doll-on-the-block-measuring-barbie-bratz-monster-high-and-american-girl-dolls.html. WEB

Hunter, Dan, and F. Gregory Lastowka. "BarbieTM." Tulane Journal of Technology & Intellectual Property, Vol. 18. Fall 2015, pp. 133-160. EBSCOhost, search.ebscohost.com/login.aspx?direct-true&db=a9h&AN=111415505&scope=site.

"List of All Barbie Movies (Online)." Princess Movies Online, Princess Movies Online Copyright © 2020. Disney Movies Online Kids Movies, 11 Aug. 2020, www.princessmovies.org/barbie-movies/list-all-barbie-movies-online/.

Martincic, Cynthia J., and Neelima Bhatnagar. "Will Computer Engineer Barbie Impact Young Woman's Career Choices?" Information Systems Education Journal, vol. 10, no. 6, Dec. 2012, pp. 4-14. EBSCOhost, search.ebscohost.com/login.aspx?direct=true&db=eric&AN=EJ1136648&site=eds-live&scope=site.

Weida, Courtney Lee, et al. "Poetics of the Fairy Tale Princess: Products, Problems, & Possibilities." Canadian Review of Art Education: Research & Issues, vol. 46, no. 2, July 2019, pp. 17–32. EBSCOhost, search.ebscohost.com/login.aspx?direct=true&db=a9h&AN=138903133&scope=site.

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #266

“... and buried deep beneath the waves, betrayed by family, to his nation with his last breath cried: beware the daughter of the sea.”

What's the last thing you looked up in the dictionary? Shit, it's right on the tip of my tongue... I was making sure I was using it right, which I was. Do you ever listen to instrumental music? Rarely, and if I do, it's normally game soundtracks. Who did you last sit on? I'm hoping you mean like... on their lap lmao in which case it'd probably be Jason. No one wants my fat ass to sit on their lap nowadays. What do you think about wind? I HATE wind, unless it's hot and there's a nice breeze. Has there been anyone that you wanted to get to know but never did? Well of course. That happened in high school a lot. What's the last thing you looked at that reminded you of someone? Teddy's picture on my shelf. Have your parents ever tried to commit suicide? Not that I know of. I couldn't even begin to imagine either of those trying that. Do you have a gag reflex? A VERY STRONG ONE. Would you rather have sex before you're married or wait till marriage? I don't care. Tbh by now, I kinda think before is wiser only to ensure you two are compatible in that area. It wouldn't matter to me personally, but I know that's important to some people and can cause issues and built-up bitterness. Just use protection, Christ. Have you ever let someone hit you? Um no? Do you have friends in other states/countries? Plenty. Been on the Internet since before I was even a pre-teen, talking to strangers lmao. Do you ever pay attention during church? I would try to back then, but I never succeeded well because my mind would wander out of boredom. Do you have self-control? That very much depends on the situation. I can be EXTREMELY impulsive, but in other cases hold it together. Have you ever broken a window? No. When was the last time you freaked someone out? I'm sure it was a few nights ago when I had another nightmare and woke up screaming. Mom always yells my name to snap me out of it. Have you ever gone on a date with a weirdo? No. Who's the last person you called a bitch? I don’t know. Is anyone in your family disabled? Yes. What do you want for Christmas? It's hella early to think about it, but I'm quite certain I'll be asking for a treadmill. How many moles do you have? I don't think I have any? Aren't freckles and moles different? Do you own any comic books? No. What is the nastiest dare you have ever committed? I don't know. I never did really nasty ones because I wasn't stupid. Do you know anyone who has been raped? Almost, anyway. Idk if I know anyone to really has been... I hope not. Are you an atheist? No. I think there's... something. Have you ever owned a goldfish? Well yeah, from like, carnival games and stuff. Who was the last person to call you beautiful? I dunno, probably a family member when I changed my FB profile picture. How many times have you been stung by a bee? Once. Those fuckin hornets better stay the holy fuck away from me. What was the last flavor of gum you chewed? Probably something fruity. When was the last time you used tape? Ummm probably when I had to tape the side of my laptop screen a bit. When was the last time you said fuck? A couple questions ago in this survey lmao. Have you ever stolen something? Only this pink crayon I thought was beautiful at Sunday school oof. Who would you like to kiss right now? Maaaan there's three people I would so long I wasn't involved with anyone else. Mark of course lol, Jason, or Sara. Who was the last person you told to 'Shut the fuck up' to? Ha ha, probably playfully to Sara. Why were you last nervous? So I joined this group on deviantART called the Guiding Light Project, which is about mental health help and positivity, and there is a list of people seeking help and what their problem is. I decided to reach out to two people I really thought I could help, and one was a guy. Men make me so nervous that I was very nervous sending him a message, but it's going very well. Whose pants did you last take off? Uhhhh. OH YEAH HEY when I was hanging out with Colleen and she got me to change her son's diaper. Hate hate hate hated it. I do not ever need kids. When was the last time you were disturbed? Hm. I'm sure over something I saw on Facebook. NO, WAIT. Sara, do not read this. When I was at Ashley's, we were watching Naked and Afraid, and they caught a chameleon to cook for food. I almost screamed. Poor thing looked terrified when the guy grabbed him. Why did you last feel awkward? Also when messaging that guy. When was the last time you got in a fight with your best friend? It's been a long time. Have you ever asked someone for a tampon? Only a friend. Who was the last person you read a book to? My niece had me read a book like fifty times. Who is the person you say the naughtiest things to? Ha ha, Sara when we're having our stupid fangirl moments. Who was the last person to send you a letter? Sara. It's still on my shelf. :') How do you feel about war? I’m a pacifist, so guess. Do you like cupcakes or muffins more? Hm, maybe cupcakes. Have you ever pushed someone on purpose? Yes. Have you ever slapped someone in the face? No. Do you have any tough life decisions to make soon? Nothing major. At what time of the day do you usually have the most energy? In the morning, once I've passed the drowsy phase. Magenta, aqua, or coral? Coral. Do you like the color orchid? Ye! Would you rather be a wedding photographer or a nature photographer? Uhhh I literally want to be both? I'm *realistically* more interested in shooting weddings for the income, but if I had my way, I'd be perfectly financially content being a nature photographer. Man, I hope that happens. Have you ever had an ulcer? No. Are you interested in health and wellness? "Rather than interests, I consider them two very important things I should always try to pay attention to. Health is very important." <<<< This. Would you ever be a fitness coach? HA no. Do you ever question whether something that makes you uncomfortable is a good thing or not? That's a very good question. This can definitely lead to you questioning flawed morals, so in that sense, it sure can be. In other ways though, it can certainly be a bad thing. Do you think for yourself? Yes. I am, generally, very opinionated and follow my gut instinct. Do you live life on your own terms, or do you do what everyone tells you to do? The former, usually. I can be AWFUL at making decisions though, so I definitely consider advice. What color is your bike? I don't have a bike. Are you due for a hike? There is physically no way I could handle a hike in my current shape. Muscle atrophy in the legs is not fuckin' fun, and with hyperhidrosis and THIS heat? Oh, hunny. Have you ever created a themed scrapbook? As a kid, I fainty remember having one? How often do you eat dessert? Very rarely. I don't need it. What's the trendiest item you own? Oh boy, I don't have a clue. I don't even know what's "trendy." Did you pull an all-nighter last night? No. When was the last time you wrote an essay? My first semester of this year. Do you enjoy writing essays? I actually do if it's a subject I'm passionate about. Do you enjoy learning? Yeah! What is your favorite fairytale? Fuckin fight me if you say Shrek isn't one. What is your favorite name that starts with a "Z"? I have no idea. Maybe Zena, though I prefer it with an "x." Have you ever felt like you were going to throw up while you were at school? Yes. I have before. Do you own a princess crown? No. When was the last time you were jealous of someone? Ugh... with how bad my PTSD has been lately, I've been having periodic episodes of raging hate and jealousy of the girl he dated after me, thinking things like, "what if he loved her more," "what if he also told her this or that," etc. They're not even together anymore, but my brain doesn't care. Do you know anyone with an eating disorder? Maybe? What was the last thing you killed? I think an earwig-ish thing. Whose number did you last get? The girl's who adopted Bentley. When was the last time you used a public bathroom? Probably not since an appointment with my psychiatrist some time ago. Have you ever used someone for money? Wow, no. Do you have manners? I honestly think I have great manners. Have you ever woken up and realized that yesterday really happened? That was ABSOLUTELY the day after the breakup. It didn't at all feel real when it was even happening. When was the last time that you had a pet that died? Last November is when we had to put Teddy to sleep. God, I miss that baby boy. Or did Mitsu die later? I don't recall for sure. Do you know anyone who retired at a young age? I mean, probably. I'm just unaware. When was the last time you took a taxi/Uber? Where were you going? Never, actually. We don't really have those here. Have you ever been diagnosed (by a professional) with OCD? Yes. Do you know any married gay couples? Distantly. Who is your favorite person to spend time with? SARA! I feel like kids having a sleepover when I've been with her. Is there anything you should tell someone, but don’t want to? Yes. Have you ever woken up somewhere and not known how you got there? I don't believe so. Do you live somewhere where recreational marijuana is legal? No. Have you ever quit a job with no notice? No. Do you have nightmares often? HA, it's just about a nightly basis now. Have you ever been on any sort of government assistance? I've gotten loans for school and stuff. Does that count? Did you have your own bedroom when you were growing up? No, I shared it with my little sister. Are you more optimistic or pessimistic? Pessimistic. Are you comfortable with your weight? Fuck no. How often do you listen to classic rock? Semi-frequently. Not as much as I did in high school. What about country? Just about never ever. Do you know anyone inside and out? I don't think that's possible. Is anyone in your family sick? Both Mom and Grammy are fighting cancer right now. I don't think my grandma has much time left. She can't walk on her own anymore. What kind of camera do you have? A Canon EOS Rebel T6. What is something you know you shouldn’t do, but do anyways? Download music. What is the most amount of money you have ever lost? Idk. Is photography one of your interests? Of course, I aim to make a career out of it. Do you know your neighbors very well? I personally don't. The person to the right of us, though, my mom knows decently and is a total and complete sweetheart. Have you ever hurt yourself just to get attention? "Kind of (I hurt myself for my own purposes, but I did want attention paid to it), when I was a teenager, because I desperately needed someone to treat me with compassion and, like, take the shit that was happening to me seriously." <<<< I don't like admitting this, but it's happened. I want to emphasize that it was not the primary reason and was rather impulsive anger and self-hate, BUT for the mentioned reasons, I did want this shit taken seriously and realize I really needed help. Has anyone ever called you conceited? No. Do you write ever write poetry just to get your feelings out? Certainly. Not like I used to, though. Who were you last really mad at? REALLY mad? I'm not sure, but probably Mom. What is a sad song that you like? "Terrible Things" by Mayday Parade has been in my head lately. What is a rumor people tell about you? I don't know of any. The only rumor that I know has ever been spread about me was that Jason and I had a baby in high school. Despite the fact I was slim then lmao. If you were given 1,000 acres of land with no strings attached, what would you do with it? Definitely plant a forest around a house I'd like to model myself, dig a nice pond for more wildlife... a lot of stuff that would benefit nature. If you had to flee their home country, where would you live? Canada. Do you think psychic abilities exist? Which one would you like to have? No. I'd like to uhhhh... predict the future when I will it myself, I guess. What’s a skill or craft that you would like to master, but haven’t? I wish I could draw exactly what I see in my head. How did you find out Santa isn’t real? My mom just told me. What’s a personality trait that you wish you had? CONFIDENCE!!!!!!! Do you believe in getting revenge on those who do wrong by you? If so, how do you go about it? Noooo no no. That creates so many more problems. If you were arrested with no explanation, what would your friends and family think you’d had done? That's a great question. If you could shop for free at one store, what would it be? For the sake of being smart, Wal-Mart. Necessities are there. Do you have any pets? If so, what are they? I have a Siamese-esque cat and a champagne ball python. I'm currently DESPERATELY trying to talk Mom into a Mexican red knee tarantula... and I really want a hognose snake. What event in your life would make a good movie? The breakup and my recovery. If you could dedicate your life to solving one problem, what would it be? Discrimination. Where do you find meaning in your life? Quite honestly, I don't feel it has much meaning currently. I'm not doing shit worthwhile. Do you believe things happen for a reason? Hell no. What do you think is a conspiracy? Honestly, I believe in quite a few. The one I believe in most was that the government was 120% involved in 911. Research. It is unbelievable. I'm very dubious that the "first" moon landing was real, either. There is an overwhelming amount of evidence it was on a soundstage. Why? America wanted to beat Russia in the space race. I love conspiracies. Do you believe in the afterlife? How do you picture it? Yes. I don't quite know how I picture it, but I lean towards like... this nirvanic state of peace and knowledge, and unity between the dead. What’s a superstition you believe in? I don’t believe in any superstitions. None. What is the dumbest way you’ve ever been injured? YOOOOOO when I was at Colleen's in-law's having dinner once, I literally took a large bite of rice RIGHT WHEN IT CAME OFF THE STOVE. I didn't know it'd only just been removed. My tongue was burned for weeks on end. Do you mind conflict? Hell yes I mind. I'm terrified of confrontation. If you could start a charity what would it be for? Something with mental health. Maybe to help those who can't afford help/therapy. If you were a cryptid (bigfoot, mothman, ect.) what would you be? I'm already a cryptid. What’s your ideal temperature and weather? Hm... like 55 and partly cloudy. What topic could you give a 20-minute presentation on with no preparation? Gay rights. Have you ever worn those drunk goggles? Yes, for D.A.R.E. in elementary school. Can you agree to disagree, or usually get upset over conflicting views? It depends on the subject of course, but I'm normally very good at agreeing to disagree. Rodeos – entertaining, or cruel? Animal fucking cruelty. Dumbasses getting gored are well-deserved. Who is the best female rocker? Why? Lita Ford is a badass. Slays on the guitar and is just cool. What color of roses do you find the prettiest? I actually like the classic, deep red. Have you ever accidentally found porn when looking for something else? I don't think so. Why do so many fans with OTP’s insist that their ship is real? I don't really know, but it's annoying. Some people are just friends, y'know. Being similar/compatible does not equate to actually liking each other like that, and the feral ones are just... wow. Do you draw fanart of anything? Not anymore. There's soooo many pictures I'd love to draw of Mark, but I literally love him so much I don't want to disgrace his face with my poor ability to make shit proportional lmao. Favorite thing to see in museums? Fossils! Have you ever seen an unwrapped mummy in person? No. What things have people shamed you for? My AvPD doesn't want me to think about this. Are there any 'adult stores’ in your area? Probably at some point. Have you been inside of them/shopped there before? No. Do you watch The Masked Singer? Any theories? No.

[artificialqueens]

take out all my insides; turn into a ghost (aquaria/asia/monet) - sheep

AN: i’ll preface this the same way i did with razorback: Oops.

this is set in the same verse as headspace, but takes place before it time wise so you won’t need to go back n read it.

warnings for talk/descriptions of eating disorders, depression, anxiety attacks, drinking/smoking in a Bad Way ™, and general mental breakdown type stuff.

the title is taken from the main piece of mood music for this monstrosity, ‘Heartscam’ by DBMK.

—

The first person to truly notice Aquaria’s problem is one of her coworkers .

There’s only thirty minutes left until they close down shop for the night, but watching Kameron sweep for the third time in an hour makes Aquaria feel like they’ll be there another few years. Business hadn’t been particularly active all day, and when the evening brought icy rain and dark clouds, what few people that had been out shopping quickly scattered.

As the night wore on, their list of things to do grew short. Kameron took to her usual late night routine of making sure everything was suspiciously clean, and Aquaria busied herself with counting the cash and staring out the window. After confirming for the fifth time that maybe four people had come in during their shift, Aquaria decides her time is better spent daydreaming.

In the land of dreams lies the object of her fascination, the prize she receives for making it through these last few torturous minutes of doing absolutely nothing.

Dinner.

Tonight is a test of endurance for Aquaria, like many nights before it. She wants to see how long she can go being cold, how many strenuous things she can accomplish while dripping in icy chill. She is no stranger to working on an empty stomach, no stranger to overpowering the jaws of hunger with her cheerful retail persona; and the promise of one free meal when she’s done moving for the day.

This boredom, though, feeling herself waste away as the minutes march on, this is another beast entirely.

She sits behind the register, lethargic, resting her head in her right hand and tapping the desk with her left. She watches the rain pour like static on a screen, the drone of drops hitting the pavement almost enough to drown out Kameron’s distant humming. Her mind wanders to the angel cake she has in the fridge at home, the leftovers Asia and Monet promised to leave her, and she’s subtly overcome with the desire to devour and sleep. Part of her regrets staying up late on top of everything else, but the more realistic part of her is indifferent. She’ll just do the same tonight.

Aquaria's fingers fumble as she breaks her gaze from the weather, met with Kameron’s furrowed brows and bitten lip. “What’s up?” she asks, ignoring the fuzz in her vision and wondering if she’d once again ‘forgotten’ to restock that rack of ugly sweaters.

Kameron leans in to take a closer look at her face, and it’s then that Aquaria realizes their proximity. “You alright, Aqua?” Kameron asks, the slight peak of southern twang in her voice telling Aquaria that something is amiss. “You look a little pale.”

In her everlasting quest to avoid telling the truth, Aquaria decides now is as good a time as any to channel her inner Brianna. “I’m always pale,” she assures with a smile, “and I’m just tired. Nothing to worry about.” She is, of course, a better liar than Brianna could ever hope to be.

Kameron lets her gaze linger long enough that Aquaria considers pulling out her phone to check her aforementioned complexion. She smiles, lets her eyes flutter closed for just a second. She even shows her teeth a little. Kameron turns away with a placated expression, and Aquaria tries not to look too pleased with her victory. She lowers her head to rest on the counter as Kameron ambles down the hallway. The dim, fuzzy idea that something is wrong persists, but she decides to ignore the feeling.

Guilt bubbles in her lungs, and Aquaria has to remind herself that it wasn’t a total lie. She is tired– positively exhausted, and preoccupied with thoughts of cold rain and hearty meals. Work and reward. Calories, routine exercise, long dreams. The image of letting her tired, heavy body meld into the couch as she finally sleeps; creating a strange, comatose creature of laze and longing.

A hand touches her head, and it’s as if a set of lenses all suddenly click into place one after another, reality sharpening around her in a whirl. She raises her head to shake the hand away. Snowflakes explode in her vision, and a high-pitched, wavering sort of buzz rattles in her ears. The sound seems to scream distress like a dog whistle. She swallows. Hard.

“Aquaria?” Kameron sounds like she’s trying to whisper through the downpour, voice faded and distant. “Can you hear me?”

“What?” she asks, perturbed by Kameron’s use of her full name, and worried further still by how thick her accent is getting. “What’s the matter?” Aquaria peers through the snow at the nearest clock and finds her answer. She’d dozed off, and now it’s time to lock up. Time to go.

Kameron moves to stop her rising. “Hang on a second” she warns, sounding somewhat desperate. “You don’t look so good.”

Aquaria tries to look at Kameron’s face, but it keeps blurring and reallinging, colors melding and shifting, a painting in motion. “D’you need me to get you some water?”

She finds herself transfixed. Kameron’s voice ebbs. “Seriously, Aquaria, you’re freaking me out.”

Silence. Black snow. There’s a brief moment of touch, but it fades quickly, swallowed in the blur and void. Her thoughts splutter, sticky with haze yet unable to remain in focus. Threads trailing, fraying, and she reaches for none, paralyzed with the experience.

The first observation that she manages to hold onto, is humming. A familiar tune, comforting, drawing her out of the deep and back to the world of the living. She’s held against a warm body. Heavy cloth droops over her twitching fingers. Strong hands run across her arm, checking her wrist for a pulse, and Aquaria finally manages to blink through the the dark snowy storm in her vision. She grips Kameron’s fingers as they brush past her own, throat dry and quiet as she speaks.

“Sorry.” Her brain reboots in defense mode, but her body remains weakened and pliant. “I’m fine. I just need to- need some fresh air.”

Kameron takes a breath, shuddering, and holds Aquaria a little tighter. “Just… stay here with me for a bit, ‘kay?”

Aquaria takes in her surroundings as her senses return. Kameron is propped up against the wall, and she is sprawled out in the girl’s lap, held in a somewhat upright position by an arm around her middle. Kameron’s chin rests on top of her head, a light, easing pressure. It dawns slowly, like impending nausea. “I passed out,” she states dumbly, incredulous. Disappointed.

Instead of speaking, Kameron leans over to unzip the duffle bag still awkwardly strapped to her. She pulls out a bottle of water, and a protein bar of some sort. “You scared the shit out of me, is what you did.” Her voice is hushed, but even, and Aquaria senses practice behind it. “I called your roommate. She was on the way to get you anyways, but she’ll be here soon.”

Aquaria debates her next words carefully. It is very easy to trick Kameron, to lie to her, but Aquaria knows that she isn’t stupid. She could figure everything out in a second, untangle her entire web of lies and expose her, like a specimen for dissection, a gross unravelling of her already unravelled psyche.

Still, it needs to be said.

The crinkling of a wrapper brings Aquaria out of her thoughts, and as she turns to accept the bar from Kameron she murmurs, “Please don’t tell Brianna.”

They lock eyes then, and Kameron fucking knows. Aquaria looks away, frantic. She should have known better .

Headlights cut through their tension, and Aquaria is suddenly very thankful for Monet’s timing. She’s both surprised and terrified to see Asia get out of the passenger seat, and knows that even though she’s out of the oven, she’s still headed for the frying pan.

They rush in, worried voices echoing in Aquaria’s frightened, still stuttering mind. She takes a bite of the bar, and stays silent. Kameron helps her up, slow and steady, and hands her over to Monet, who wraps a protective arm around her waist to steady her.

Kameron explains what happened. Asia says she’s seen it before. She catches the word anemia, and relaxes, if only a little. At least it’s the wrong A-word.

They prepare to leave, Asia on one side of her and Monet on the other, and Aquaria turns back to look at Kameron. A gust of cool air breezes past her as Asia opens the door, and she notices that Kameron doesn’t have her leather jacket on.

She rolls her shoulders. The clinking of buckles around her collar makes her heart drop.

- - -

Aquaria is far more careful at work, after the incident.

She snacks before she leaves, and finds a place to squirrel away for a few extra calories during her break. Sometimes, the tiny girl with the dog tattoo from the game store across the street will happen across her hiding spot. She doesn’t watch, and never says anything, so they let each other be.

She starts to keep a bottle of water with her at all times, advil and a cereal bar tucked in her back pockets. She is not going to pass out at work again. It nags at her still, how stupid she was to land herself in such a vulnerable position. How foolish she was to show Kameron something like that. To let her know, to touch her skin with icy, frosted fingers.

Tonight, however, she is once again testing her endurance. Only this time, she’s been cautious, strategic. This night has a solid week of planning packed into it, from her last drink before work down to the three hundred and fifty calories waiting for her at home.

She’s not working with Kameron tonight, either. A decidedly feverish Brianna is her shift partner for the evening, and while under normal circumstances this would still require a similar amount of forethought, the fact that Brianna is sick almost makes Aquaria giddy.

Guilt creeps along her shoulder blades, and Aquaria shivers. It’s not like she wants her friend to be ill. She just wants Brianna to go home so she can be left to her self destruction. It takes both more and less energy to lie to Brianna than it does with Kameron. She’s very observant, wholly empathetic and understanding in a way that  Aquaria can’t always comprehend, but Brianna also made the mistake of trusting her.

They loved each other, once. And though now that love has changed, they still share a sense of knowing, could still map each other out. It’s a double edged blade for them both, but the scales are tipping as Kameron becomes Brianna’s top priority.

Aquaria is happy for them, she really is. It just also happens to work in her favor. Brianna is becoming too preoccupied to notice the little things anymore, too distracted to call her out on the fibs that she was previously very keen to. On some level, it stings. On another, it feels right.

Brianna looks like she needs to rest, regardless.

It’s been busy all evening, and they’ve even had a few ‘speak to the manager,’ types to deal with. There’s been lots of strain, lots of Brianna running back and forth to grab things, lots of Aquaria trying her best to dissuade entitled customers. Now, in the at least momentary peace, there is lots of cleaning to be done.

They’re both a bit put out, but Brianna is pale, eyes rimmed like a raccoon, sickness almost palpable as it weighs on her tiny little shoulders.

“You’re not looking so hot, Bri,” Aquaria notes with a frown, passing by the blonde with an armful of unfortunately orange khakis.

Brianna smirks, reaching up on her tiptoes to readjust a sign that some oblivious beanpole must have knocked askew. “You could just call me ugly,” she laughs, wiping sweat from her brow.

Aquaria squirms past her again, flicking her forehead as she deadpans, “Okay, Ugly. You’re not looking so hot.”

“Rude, bitch,” Brianna scolds with a smile, batting the girl’s hand away to the best of her impaired ability. “You’re not wrong, though. This virus is really knocking me out.”

Inhaling softly, Aquaria turns her brows in pity. Brianna really does look like a risen corpse right now, but she may also be playing up the theatrics to make sure her plan works out. She trails her fingers down Brianna’s shoulder. “Yeah, maybe we should call Kameron and get you home. You look like you need a sleep.”

Brianna breaks into a fit of giggles at that, sniffling. “And you sound like you need sleep, Aqua.”

A blush spreads across Aquaria’s face and she curses her clumsy tongue. The slip is easily remedied, however. She’s still in control. She slowly pulls away, adding distance between them, knowing Brianna will overthink it. She knows she’ll dissect the action, prodding further and further until she comes to the conclusion that going home will gain Aquaria’s approval and thereby regain her closeness.

Sometimes, Aquaria feels horrible for taking advantage of people like this. Other times, she only wishes she did.

Catching a glimpse of herself in one of the stores many mirrors, Brianna finally gives in. “You’re right. I look more defunct than some of our stock,” she prods at her face, pulling at her eye bags. “Will you be okay closing by yourself?”

Pushing her feelings away, Aquaria smiles like her life depends on it. “Of course I will,” she waves off the girl’s concerns with an easy tone. “You know me. I’ll get everything done.” She passes behind Brianna, brushes her back with her shoulder, re-establishing their proximity and watching from the corner of her eye as the girl pulls out her phone.

Aquaria pretends to be busy folding clothes when Brianna turns to her. “You know that’s not what I mean,” she starts, but whatever lecture she has in store is interrupted by the unmistakable sound of an entering customer. Aquaria rushes to greet them.

It’s fifteen minutes and three indecisive shoppers later before Kameron gets there. Brianna looks physically relieved to see her, and immediately rushes off to the break-room to gather her things. Kameron saunters up to the counter, and fixes Aquaria with an unexpected, smouldering stare.

“How are you doing, Aqua?” she asks in a tone so warm Aquaria almost melts.

Caught off guard by the break in their usual greetings, and the sheer sentiment in Kameron’s eyes, she answers honestly. “Worn out,” a sigh, “but otherwise in good shape.”

Kameron nods, leans just a little closer, murmurs like she doesn’t want Brianna to hear should she happen to come back. “Had time to eat yet?”

Alarm bells sound off. A test.

“No,” Aquaria says, frowning for good measure. She boasts another lie like a shameless brat. “I have leftovers, though. I cooked myself some stir fry last night.”

“That’s good,” Kameron hums, content. She reaches into her pocket, the buckles of her jacket clinking their familiar clink as she slides a single protein bar across the counter. “Here’s a snack,” she adds, “just in case.”

Brianna stumbles back towards them then, out of her uniform and changed into something that looks more like children’s pajamas than casual wear, but Aquaria elects to keep her mouth shut. The two lovebirds attach like magnets, fingers interlocking, gazes drawn to each others.

“You guys are gonna make me sick,” Aquaria mocks, and Brianna sticks her tongue out in retaliation.

“We’ll leave you to it then, sourpuss,” she laughs, turning to her girlfriend with a glazed, satiated twinkle in her eye. “Let’s head out, babe. I’m beat.”

“I bet you are,” Kameron chuckles, brushing her thumb across Brianna’s cheek. She turns back to Aquaria, giving her the same expression of worry. “You can text me if you need anything, yeah?”

She could just text their boss, like she’s technically supposed to, but Aquaria finds herself nodding anyways. “Whatever you say, mom,” she rolls her eyes, smiling equal parts bitter and sweet.

“She’ll be fine,” Brianna assures. Her next words are a challenge issued the same way it always was. She cocks her head to the side, mouth innocent but eyes wise. She glances to the bar on the counter. “Won’t you, Aquaria?”

It’s nostalgia and heartache all at once, molten feeling boiling to the surface stopped only by her obsidian tongue, countering the same way she always did. “I’ll be perfect.”

Then, they’re gone.

Aquaria stares at the bar, cursing herself for forgetting to factor her own stupid brain into the equations of planning this night. Emotion twinges in her stomach, raw and uncomfortable, until a tall, bulky man stalks in. His clothes do all the bragging before he can even open his mouth, and whatever cologne he’s wearing almost makes her eyes water. He leers in a manner Aquaria is all too familiar with.

She smiles extra wide to avoid the crush of disgust and loneliness. “Welcome, sir. How may I help you?”

- - -

Kameron was the first to notice because if there’s anything Aquaria is good at, it’s lying to people she’s in love with.

It’s the reason Brianna broke things off with her. The reason nothing between her, Asia, and Monet is official. Even though they’re living together, even though she fucking aches for it.

She wants everything and gives nothing in return, loves without being loved. She becomes intimately familiar with those she’s drawn to, observes them carefully so she can figure out what makes them tick; all the while keeping herself locked in a box with only a hole cut out for her smile. She’s a master in the art of controlling conversation, steering it away from her, shutting people out.

It goes further than romance, of course. Aquaria expends a great amount of energy ensuring people only see of her what she allows them to.

Her cautions for work and elsewhere are but dust in comparison to how she functions around Asia and Monet, however. She runs on complete overdrive around them, giddy, watchful, paranoid. She’s always loved the rain, but it makes weaving webs difficult. Dew and water colliding with her carefully angled threads, pulling things askew, threatening to weigh on them until breaking.

Tonight, one snaps.

“Hold on,” Asia starts, in that tone that means she’s figured someone out, eager to call them on it. “Aquaria told me you guys got dinner on her break.”

Her stomach implodes in fear, a black hole, devouring even her mind’s instant screams for her to the sprint the rest of the way to her room. Footsteps. Her room is just at the end of the hallway, and they’re in the kitchen. She could make it if she ran. ‘Think, think, think,’ she tells herself, breathing hard and taking horrid, slow strides forward.

“Aquaria,” Asia calls her name, expectant. “Come here and talk to me for a second.”

The gears are still spinning as she slowly turns on her heel. “I heard,” she mumbles, feigning tiredness. She swallows, tentative in her words. “I’m really not feeling well, can I just go to bed?” She tries her best to sound cranky, knowing that she’s more liable to snap when she’s sick, but it just sounds like she’s going to cry. To be fair, she’s dangerously close.

Neither of them are allowed to know her secret, her problem. It would ruin everything. It’s not that she doesn’t trust them, it’s just how it has to work. In the past, telling others her vulnerabilities only hurt Aquaria further, only turned their kindness to revulsion. So, they can’t know. This was the root of tonight’s broken silk.

Monet had a rare day off, and came to visit Aquaria during her break. They laughed together, momentarily attached at the hip, and Monet provided much needed relief from the tortures of retail work. But they hadn’t eaten. Aquaria had used the same excuse she’s using now, that she wasn’t feeling well, and couldn’t stomach it.

It’s barely even a lie, at this point. The rest of her shift was spent trying to keep upright as she festered with whatever cold she’d gotten off Brianna, but even feeling truly ill she had texted Asia something completely different. Something to keep her from worrying.

Asia comes towards her, frown unreadable. “Let me take a look at you.”

Fear still curls in Aquaria’s chest, hot steam building pressure and pushing for release. She flinches away from Asia’s fingers as the woman reaches out to touch her face, eyes wide. She sucks in a sharp breath, glance darting frantically. She’s been caught in a lie, and now they have the chance to peek behind the intricate filters, to see her for who she really is. Pathetic, selfish, narcissistic.

Ugly.

Something in Asia’s expression changes when Aquaria is barely capable of whimpering her response over the threat of tears. “Please,” she begs, shutting her eyes. “I don’t feel good."

With a sigh, Asia slows her movements until her hand rests on Aquaria’s cheek, touch somehow mollifying and panic inducing at the same time. Gentler still, she plants a lingering kiss on the girl’s forehead. "You’re running a fever,” she states upon pulling away, watching carefully, observing a skittish animal. “Do you want me to get you some acetaminophen?”

Aquaria thinks about Kameron doting over Brianna–  making her soup, tucking her in, staying until she falls asleep, loving her–  and stares into Asia’s eyes, lost in fatal curiosity.

“I’ll be fine,” she chokes, and can’t stop herself from taking a sudden deep, shuddering inhale. Something hot and shameful runs down her cheek. “I… I-I need to go lie down.”

Her legs finally seem to get the memo, and she all but flies down the hallway into her room. The slam of the door masks the noise of misery that’s clawing its way up from her tightened throat. She turns the lock, covers her mouth, and listens to Asia pace outside; feeling her heartbeat quicken with every breath.

“And what did your interrogation reveal?” Monet’s humor laced voice questions as it approaches from the end of the hall. Aquaria slowly slides down against the door, curling her knees up to her chest.

Asia sighs, slow and heavy. “Something’s wrong.”

‘Nothing is wrong. There’s nothing to worry about.’ Ice cuts up her lungs as she breathes, and slams her forehead onto her knees to ease the pain, however little sense it makes.

“What do you mean?” Monet asks, “it’s just a little bug. She’ll be fine.”

‘She’s right,’ Aquaria thinks, screwing her eyes shut and sneering through her panic. ‘I’ll be fine. I’ll be perfect. I always am.’

“It’s not the fever that I’m worried about, you fool,” Asia huffs, “she was crying.” There’s a short silence, wherein Aquaria has just enough time to remember exactly how much of herself she hasn’t shown them.

“Why aren’t you with her then?” Monet sounds slightly frantic, and Aquaria’s body turns to blue brittle ice in a fraction of a second when she hears her start to approach the door.

“Don’t,” Asia’s voice is stern, yet solemn and resigned. “Give her space.”

“But-”

“She doesn’t want to talk about it,” Asia persists, and Aquaria is almost relieved. “But we’re gonna talk about it. Just… not right now. She needs time to calm down.”

She tunes them out then, too occupied with pulling her hair down over her ears, ice and blood spraying from nose as she breathes in shallow, uneven puffs.

Now, she’s really fucked up. The thought makes her room a tundra, darkened, icy, and alone. Devoid. Unfeeling. She breathes like her chest is caving in for what feels like centuries, but eventually, she acclimates to the cold and crawls to her desk.

With translucent, blue fingertips, she reaches for her sketchbook. There’s only a black ballpoint pen clipped to the spiral binding, but Aquaria doesn’t care. She needs to get these feelings out of her body and onto the pages before she explodes. Color is unnecessary.

She stays up late into the night, drawing, scribbling without any thought. Asia knocks on her door at some point, calls her name, but she pretends to be asleep and doesn’t answer. She draws the things she wants, made horrid and ugly. A beautiful woman, stomach split and spilling gore. A wedding attended by bodies in decay, all seated to one side.

She hangs them on the wall, next to her fashion sketches. Then, she cries again.

The fever forces her into bed sometime after three. As she slips into unconsciousness, she thinks about what would have happened if she’d let Asia take care of her. If she hadn’t run away.

Laying on the couch, half buried in blankets, Monet’s hands running through her hair and Asia stroking the side of her face like she always wants to. She’d take the medicine and feel a little better, resting in the company of people who love her.

Her room is cold and empty. Finally, she sleeps.

- - -

Aquaria can only keep it all a secret for so long.

Kameron already knows. Asia is going to figure it out, tell Monet, and they’ll kick her out. Brianna will find out, too, and be angry with her. Everything is going to crumble.

She’s been dutifully avoiding Asia and Monet over the past few days. It hurts her, kills her, but it must be done. She can only keep it a secret for so long, and she’s stretching that amount of time to the best of her ability. She’ll leave early in the morning, explore the city, stay out after work and not return until everyone has fallen asleep. This cycle continues until the end of the week, when Monet and Asia both have work parties to attend.

Aquaria stumbles back into their apartment around nine, dizzy and heavy-headed. She’s not drunk yet, but she might as well be with how little sleep she’s been getting, how little food she’s been eating. Asia and Monet are nowhere to be seen, and so Aquaria wastes no time putting her bag down and getting ready for another night out.

First, she shuffles into Monet’s room. Despite having been told multiple times that she is free to smoke if she likes, Aquaria usually refuses to do so alone. She says it’s because it feels like stealing when Monet isn’t there, and while true, it’s mostly because smoking weed when she’s alone is a very bad idea. She becomes too thoughtful, too introspective, and so goddamn hungry. She dwells on moments and flaws in kaleidoscopic detail, stuffing her face until she nods off.

Tonight, though, she doesn’t particularly care about the consequences, begging for the worst. She readies Monet’s bong in the bathroom, packing more than she should into the bowl, exhaling deeply and lighting up. She didn’t put quite enough water in and it makes her throat feel like lacerated ash, but she manages to finish in one go and cough it all out the window. It rushes to her head, quicker than usual, and she gulps in fear.

She spends a few minutes bent over the sink, spluttering, thoughts already growing beyond her control and stealing her away with them. A howling storm of 'ugly selfish, awful.’ She grips the counter top so hard it hurts, staring herself down in the mirror. Eventually, she calmly puts everything down, steals one of Monet’s sweaters, and walks back into the kitchen. Her senses pull and warp, and she thinks about herself in the seventh grade, small and gross and trying too hard.

She sneaks a bottle of something blue from the liquor cabinet, taking a hearty sip. A deluge of sweetness and agony washes over her tongue, and it brings a strange half smile to her face. She pulls out her phone, turning off airplane mode and watching the flood of late texts from Monet and Asia asking where she is, if she’s alright, to please call them. Her breathing picks up and she can’t quite name what she’s feeling, so she just takes another drink instead.

No matter how much she tries to prevent it, no matter how well she hides, she’s causing them pain. She’s hurting them like she hurt Brianna, and they won’t want to be with her either. The thought makes her laugh instead of cry, like it probably should. She doesn’t belong with them. She doesn’t belong with anyone, anywhere.

It’s hard to keep track of her thoughts and actions, but between more sips of liquor and grabbing one of Asia’s jackets, she finds herself outside again, walking along a busy road to avoid staying in the house and binge eating. She holds the towel-wrapped bottle in one hand, and whiteknuckles her phone with the other. The wind whips past her face and she can barely notice the rumble of 'ugly, disgusting, unlovable,’ over the roar of engines and fog of exhaust. It’s fucking heavenly .

She walks, and drinks, thinks about her collarbones, and drinks some more. At some point, her legs start to feel like jelly and the only part of her brain that isn’t trying to kill her knows she needs to sit down somewhere. So she sits, and watches the cars a little too intently, for a little too long.

Her phone tells her that it’s now very-late o’clock, that she has a lot of missed calls and a few more concerned texts.  She can’t really read anymore, the phone is too bright and her drink is so sweet, but she opens them anyways. She can make out a few words. Where. Drunk. Looking. Worried.

She feels even more upset after reading them, even though nothing registered. She sniffles, takes another swig of her drink, shivers.

The realization trickles down her spine, cold and uncomfortable. She doesn’t know where she is, what she’s done, what she’s going to do. ‘Stupid, stupid, stupid.’

Her fingers swipe to the call screen without her mind’s permission, and she thinks about calling them, hearing their voices and telling them she’s sorry– that she misses them– but she can’t bring herself to. She taps another name instead.

It rings once, twice, and she’s never been so grateful to hear Kameron’s voice in her life. "Hey, what’s up, how are you?” she greets, just like she always does, and stifles a yawn.

Aquaria could fucking cry.

“Kameron,” she whimpers, and the sound of her own voice makes her uneasy. “I need help.”

“What happened? Are you okay?” Kameron wastes no time asking questions, and there’s some static as she presumably sits up in bed. “Have you been drinking?”

“Yeah,” Aquaria whispers, strongarmed into honesty by her blood alcohol content. “I took a bottle for a walk, and it’s dark, I think… I think I’m lost.” She looks around, trying to glean something from her surroundings but unable to see through the haze of tears and headlights. “I’m sad,” she adds, just to get it off her chest.

“Oh, sweetheart,” Kameron croons, “You stay put an’ I’m gonna come get you, 'kay?"

It makes Aquaria feel like a child, but in a calming way. She tries to stay focused. There’s more shuffling on the other end of the line, muffled speech and the jangle of keys. "You’re so nice to me,” her teeth chatter in the cool night. “Why are you so nice to me?”

Kameron answers with her own question. “Brianna’s coming with me, is that alright?”

Oh.

The illusion of comfort shatters. She’s just bothering them, too. Interrupting their time and making them worry, hurting them with her stupidity. Brianna’s probably going to yell at her for being selfish, inconsiderate and pathetic in her anguish. Serves her right.

“Aqua?” Kameron beckons over the phone, “you still there?”

She could hang up. Could turn her phone back on airplane mode, finish off the bottle and find a bench to sleep on. She doesn’t need help, she just needs to stop bothering the people she cares about.

But she doesn’t hang up. “M'sorry,” she slurs instead, listens to the sound of an engine starting, breathes a little quicker. “I fucked up. I really fucked up.”

Silence. Brianna answers. “Hey there,” she says, tone knowing and tinged with anxiety. “Take a deep breath for me?"

She shudders through an inhale, holds, and exhales hard through her nose. ‘Worthless, annoying burden.’

"Can you tell us where you are?”

She looks around again, tries to remember the route she took. “No,” she blubbers, pitiful. “I’m lost, and it’s really dark, and, and-”

“It’s okay,” Brianna soothes, “can you try and check your location on your phone?”

She pulls it away from her ear, biting down on her lip. ‘Idiotic, foolish creature.’ A few moments of fumbling later, she texts them the street name, and completely interrupts Brianna with more whimpering. “I’m sorry, Bri,” she hiccups, frostbite gushing through her veins. “I shouldn’t bother you with this… you shouldn’t… you don’t need to…”

“Babe,” Brianna says, a reflex. “You need to relax. It’s okay.”

For the first time since they’ve known each other, Aquaria listens.

“We’ll be there in a few, alright?”

She keeps her eyes trained on the asphalt, breathing slow like Brianna said and still holding the phone to her ear even though they’ve already ended the call. Soon, a car pulls up on the side of the road, and the rush of relief drives her to stand up far too quickly. The world tilts around her but she stumbles over to Brianna anyways, all but collapsing onto her.

She’s maneuvered into the backseat, and when Brianna slides in next to her she can’t help but to pull the girl close, clawing at the back of her jacket. “Bri,” she groans, tears flowing freely as she hides her face. “Bri, I fucked up. I’m bad, just like you said, and- and they’re never going to talk to me again.” The words die off in a garbled sob. Everything presses down at once, forceful and constricting.

A hand strokes through her tangled hair, and a calm voice hushes her, but doesn’t interrupt when she starts to speak again.

“I should just tell them,” she heaves an exhale, “but nothing’s wrong. Nothing’s wrong but it- it hurts so bad.”

“What do you mean, Aqua?” The words are whispered into her hair, but she shrinks away and shakes her head.

“Nothing’s wrong,” she repeats, hollow, and continues to muffle her wails. “Nothing’s wrong with me.”

She has no idea how long she spends sobbing in Brianna’s lap, but when the car comes to a stop, she’s fuzzy and numb. The door opens, and she’s cradled in strong arms, metal clinking as she nuzzles her cheek against cool leather. “Don’t carry me,” she whines, “too heavy.”  If she weren’t so drunk, Aquaria would be certain Kameron presses a kiss to her forehead, but in her current state she has trouble believing it.

Her head’s spinning has escalated to black dots searing through her eyes, like a photograph on fire. She’s gently laid on a couch, the pull of sleep making a wreck of her already dulled senses, so much so that when Brianna starts to ask questions again she doesn’t react.

Then, she’s devoured by the endless dark.

- - -

She wakes up frantic, sitting bolt upright, headache quick to split her skull.

Her memory is blotchy, and as her vision swims into focus, she sees a figure bustling in kitchen. Rubbing the sleep from her eyes reveals it to be Kameron, who perks up when she spots Aquaria’s wide eyed stare.

She tiptoes into the living room, coffee in hand, and kneels on the floor beside the couch. “How are you feeling this mornin’?” she asks, giving the girl a look of sympathy. “I wasn’t expecting you to be up so early.”

Aquaria ponders the question in earnest, meets Kameron’s gaze, forces her tongue to move. “Afraid,” she croaks. “Everything hurts.”

Kameron lays the coffee on the table, sits beside her, rests a hand on her shoulder. “Do you want me to call your roommates so they can take you home?”

‘Yes,’ her heart cries.

‘No,’ her brain counters.

Something inside her short circuits. Panic bleeds through the fog of sleep.

Sparing her from having to answer, Brianna enters the room and shares a long, worried look with Kameron before sitting on Aquaria’s other side. She can’t look at either of them, can’t open her eyes to the icy mess she’s made, and is grateful when Brianna gathers her in her arms.

“Can you get some water for her?” The girl’s voice is still comforting, even directed at someone else. “Some ibuprofen, too.”

She lets the tears come out again once Kameron leaves the room. Brianna’s seen her cry before, seen her yell, seen her at her ugliest. It’s safe to show her now.

“God, Aquaria,” Brianna sighs, rocking her side to side. “What’s bothering you? I’ve never seen you this upset.”

Aquaria surprises herself with her answer. “I’m tired of hiding, Bri.” A beat of silence, the words spill from her lips without control. “I-I don’t wanna lie anymore.”

“You don’t have to lie, babe. Tell me what’s wrong.”

She doesn’t want to say it. She really doesn’t want to say the A-word, especially not to Brianna. “I… I think I’m- I think I, uhm…”

Brianna tells her to take her time, and so she takes a moment to gather her courage. She needs to tell someone, to spill her guts and scream until she’s exhausted every possible description of the visceral pain she’s in. But Brianna already knows how it feels, so Aquaria spares her the details and rips the metaphorical bandaid off before she can back out.

“I’m sorry,” she warns, weak, and moves to whisper it in Brianna’s ear.

The confession pools like bitter blood in her mouth, and she’s overcome with the desire to run away. The arms around her tighten, shaking. The room slowly freezes.

“How long?” Is Brianna’s only response, voice clipped and breaking. Shame roils in Aquaria’s throat.

“I never wanted to tell you.”

When they had first started dating, Brianna was in a very bad place mentally. She was a tightly wound ball of anxiety, despair, and self-loathing, wrapped in a layer of humor and a background in theatre. She could weave a web of lies just as well as Aquaria, if not better, at the time. She lied about food most often, and while Aquaria caught on to a couple of them, she never said a thing. She didn’t have the right to. She was doing the exact same, a mirror copy parroting similar excuses.

They were, and still are, famous for their bickering and banter, but after the ambulance and the two days Aquaria spent hallucinating candy in the hospital waiting room it all turned sour. When they fought after that, it was raw and serious , and Aquaria knows she could have been better; could have been more supportive, been empathetic for even just a minute. But she wasn’t. Survival instinct came first.

After a lifetime of killing themselves, weeks of killing each other, and a year of dying together in the same house, they ended it. Over time, Brianna made an effort to heal. Over time, she became the better liar.

The sound of Kameron padding her way back over to them brings Aquaria down to reality, if only somewhat. She uses that same practiced, even voice to tell Brianna it’s okay, to go take a minute to breathe, that she can take care of things.

This leaves Aquaria, still teary and disoriented, staring into the empty space where Brianna had been sitting. She gulps.

Kameron sits beside her again. She holds out two pills and Aquaria swallows them dry, only drinking when Kameron wraps her hands around the glass and guides it to her mouth. "You told her.”

Guilt blooms under Aquaria’s fragile ribs. Her voice comes out robotic. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have bothered you.”

She’s ready to stand, ready to swipe her phone off the coffee table, run as far as her legs can carry her and never look back. Something cold splashes her leg, and Kameron takes the glass away.

Aquaria knows what’s coming next. Kameron is going to be angry that she upset Brianna, and send her away. That’s fine. That’s what she wants. She doesn’t deserve to be comforted and cared for, they’re only wasting their energy, and once they realize it everything will go back to normal. Nothing will be wrong.

“Don’t be sorry,” Kameron pleads, repeating herself when Aquaria shakes her head in response. “You don’t need to apologize. Bri will be okay. You didn’t do anything wrong.” She reaches out, warm fingers brushing against Aquaria’s cheek, gingerly turning the girls face to look at her. “I’m glad that you told us,” she murmurs, “I’m proud of you.”

Time screeches to a halt and Aquaria bites back a sob, cupping Kameron’s hand with her own. She’s overwhelmed by the intimacy of the statement, awed by its tenderness, yet it somehow hurts more than anger would have.

Kameron hugs her then, and Aquaria is reminded of how small she’s become. They lull into a comfortable silence, filled only by Kameron’s humming, turned into a mess of limbs on the couch. Somewhere along the way, she rests her head against Kameron’s chest and revels in the heartbeat that fills her ear. A reminder that this is real, that she’s not just drunkenly dreaming of such kindness.

When Brianna comes back, she’s on the phone with someone. Through her exhausted haze, Aquaria notes that she’s the subject of the conversation. "Tell them I’m fine,” she yawns, assuming Asia or Monet is on the other end of the line.

Kameron rubs her back while Brianna tells the truth. “She’s not in good shape, but she’s okay.”

She’s surprised when this description elicits no fear. Upon further foggy thought, Brianna’s right. She’s achy, drained, and emotionally numb, but she’s okay. She’s being held instead of berated, talking instead of hiding, resting instead of running.The water is unsettled, but the ice has melted.

She dimly realizes her dozing when Brianna tells the phone she’s “out like a light,” but makes no effort to deny the claim. Kameron is warm, and to just be wrapped in someone’s arms is all she’s wanted for a long time. Their hushed voices sound like a lullaby, and with a deep sigh, she once again drifts asleep.

- - -  

When she wakes, Brianna has gone to work, and Kameron offers to drive her home.

She gets a shower, changes into some of Brianna’s now categorically ridiculous sleepwear, and nestles herself in the passenger’s seat with both of the coats wrapped around her. She thanks Kameron quietly, but profusely, and is met with a smile.

“No worries, darlin’,” she assures, accent still thick like it has been all morning. Aquaria kind of loves hearing it, if she’s honest. “Can I talk to you for a bit, though?”

Aquaria nods, and as they begin their drive through the lazy late afternoon traffic, Kameron cautiously approaches her subject. “Brianna tells me you have trouble… opening up to people,” she mumbles, eyes soft as she casts a quick glance to meet Aquaria’s waiting gaze.

She starts to stutter out a denial, but after a few failed attempts she simply breathes, “Yeah, I think I do.”

“I understand the feeling,” Kameron admits, eyes fixed on the road. “Somewhat, at least. You’re afraid when they look, they won’t like what they see.”

She doesn’t answer. Kameron continues.

“I’ve been learnin’ that when someone loves you, they wanna see. They wanna see you, know you, share themselves with you. It’s special to them.” She pauses, then smiles again. “It sounds like your roommates really care about you,” she says, “you should show them.”

“I’m scared,” Aquaria squeaks, pulling the collar of one of the sweaters up over her mouth. “It’s ugly.”

“That’s understandable,” Kameron hums as they turn onto Aquaria’s street. “But trust me, even if you think that, they’ll still want to see it. People can be stubborn when they’re in love.” They pull to a stop outside her apartment, and let the conversation breathe, sitting in a calming silence until Kameron breaks it, tone light. “And, hey,” she grins, “they invited you to take over their guest room. That’s a pretty good sign.”

Aquaria laughs then, the sound foreign but bright. Kameron laughs, too, and gives her a look that makes her heart swell . Insisting on being a gentlemen, Kameron walks her to the door, and gives her one last hug before heading off.

She hears running before she can even get her key out of the lock, and Monet appears in the doorway as she kicks off her sneakers. They look at each other for a few tense moments, and then Aquaria yelps as she’s practically tackled to the ground.

“What the fuck, man,” Monet exclaims, holding Aquaria close like the girl will disappear if she doesn’t, like it’s a mirage she desperately wants to be real. “Where the fuck have you been?”

Allowing herself relax, Aquaria reaches to return the embrace, following Kameron’s advice and letting honesty ooze through the cracks in her armor. “I’m sorry,” she answers into Monet’s shoulder. “I missed you.”

A split second decision, she pushes against Monet’s grip and gets on her tiptoes to kiss her full force, peppering her face with sloppy, unrestrained affection. Monet moves her away, hands gentle under her jaw, and the longer Aquaria stares into her eyes the more her own well with tears.

“Hey, hey,” Monet soothes, brushing away tear trails with her thumb. “What’s wrong, Aqua? What’s going on in that head of yours?"

Emotion rains down on her shoulders, and she mauls the careful webbing with her heart in her throat.

"I love you,” she rasps, shatters. She gives a crooked smile through her body’s shuddering. “I’m sorry, I know I’m breaking the rules.”

Monet pulls her close again, cradles the base of her head in a way that turns her into a happy little puddle. “You made the rules, baby. You can break 'em if you want.”

Realization written plain across her face, Aquaria blinks twice and asks, “So I can say it again?”

Monet answers her with a kiss, soft but weighted with longing. Aquaria’s exhausted body melts into the gesture, voice liquid smoke as she repeats her confession, sweet words whispered against Monet’s lips.

A smile, eyes like sunlit gold, another kiss to the edge of her mouth. “I love you too, Aqua,” Monet hums, the corners of her eyes crinkling with her elation.

They finally pull apart and move out of the porch, only making it as far as the couch before Monet is all over her again, hands running along her body in slow, trailing motions. She holds Aquaria by the chin, runs her finger over the sharp curve of her jawline, offers to order pizza.

“Asia is working late tonight?” Aquaria asks, tone not unlike a disappointed child. The recently unleashed lovesick part of her brain was looking forward to a home cooked meal. She usually saved her meal of the day for dinner with at least one of them, and it’s a routine she’s been sorely missing.

Monet shakes her head, and her gaze heats with concern. “She’ll be home around five. You’re just- you look really boney.”

Aquaria shivers, but doesn’t look away. Her stomach growls at the mention of food and she tucks herself into her collar, voice trembling with shame. “Do I?”

She’s answered with a kiss to the forehead, zipper sliding away and revealing her bitten lip. “It’s okay,” Monet says, sweeps her thumb across the girl’s bottom lip and watches her eyes glaze with the action. “Asia will take care of that. Hope you’re ready to get mother-henned.”

Aquaria lets Monet choose the toppings, preoccupied with a new anxiety and untrusting of her ability to keep up the honesty. She’s reminded of what she did, how crippling the fear of facing Asia’s concern has been. They watch cartoons while they wait, and later as she’s lifting the thinnest piece to her mouth, she asks in a small voice, “Is Asia mad at me?”

Monet swallows in a hurry. “Maybe a little,” she shrugs, “but only because she’s been so worried. We both have.” She smooths her pizza-free hand over Aquaria’s knee, comforting.

“Oh.”

“You really gave us a scare, baby.”

“Oh,” Aquaria says again, even smaller, laying the untouched slice back in the box.

Picking up another, Monet offers it to her. “She really wants to see you. You should’ve heard her this morning when she was on the phone with Brianna.”

Sensing little point in fighting, Aquaria accepts it, taking the smallest bite she can. “I just…” She struggles to form the words, to describe the feeling. “I don’t want her to be mad at me.“ She takes another, bigger bite, not thinking about it. Monet puts an arm around her shoulders to give her a reassuring squeeze, muttering something Aquaria doesn’t quite catch.

By the time they hear the sound of a key in the lock, Aquaria has eaten three entire slices, and she goes completely rigid as the door creaks open. Monet kisses her cheek, tells her not to worry, and then Asia is there.

Everything happens in a rush. Monet stands, Asia drops her purse, and before she can even open her mouth Aquaria is buried in a hug. Asia doesn’t say anything for a long while, just sits and holds her, face hidden in the crook of her neck.

It slowly dawns on her that Asia crying; upset, almost injured by her absence. She doesn’t know what to do, so she starts by stating the obvious, voice quiet. "Monet said you were, uhm, worried about me.”

The fear in Asia’s usually sure tone breaks her heart.

“Of course I was worried,” she pulls back, taking Aquaria’s face in both hands. “When we came back and found your bag on the floor, I thought you were hurt or- or-” Her voice catches. The thought remains unspoken, but clear.

Aquaria thinks back to the night she had a fever, to the countless times Asia has tried to pick apart the webs, tried to see her. Raw feeling bubbles in her throat, the same way it did when she saw Monet. She swallows the hesitation, and speaks. “I’m sorry,” she presses their foreheads together, closes her eyes. “I’m sorry. I-I love you."

"I love you,” Asia replies, as if they’re trying to one-up each other. “God, you reckless little-  never do that again.”

“Told you,” Monet taunts fondly from above them. She ruffles Aquaria’s hair, smiling when the girl blinks up at her. Leaning down, she kisses Asia’s cheek and says “Mother hen,” in a mocking sort of sing-song, trying to swipe up the empty pizza box before Asia can notice that they’ve been eating on the couch.

“Oh, shut up,” Asia huffs, letting Aquaria go to rub at her eyes. “You cried, too.”

“You have no proof,” Monet counters, and just as she thinks she’s gotten away with it, Asia reaches out to grab her wrist.

“No,” she admits, “but I do have proof that you’ve been getting crumbs all over my expensive couch. Again.”

Aquaria watches them fall into one of their usual old-married-couple arguments, something about the cost of leather furniture and the tenacity of grease stains. It makes her feel at home. She knows work is going to kill her tomorrow, that the chill will come back again at some point in full force, but it doesn’t matter. Right now, she’s warm. Right now, she’s watching her two favorite people love each other.

Their banter has relocated to the kitchen, now, and Aquaria is still observing from her new position leaning on the counter. They turn to her as she laughs, giving each other a look of agreement. Monet approaches from one side, tucking some of Aquaria’s hair from her face. Asia comes from the other, stroking her thumb across the girl’s cheek.

Aquaria looks back at them, moonstruck. Though one secret remains locked away, she allows herself to simmer in the company of people who love her.

[kayura-sanada]

I don't know if someone already asked it or if it's a stupid question, but why you don't really like Xion? I've read that on some of your older posts, so I'm curious about to hear your reasons (I'm not mocking you if it did sound kind of rude)

It’s never stupid to sincerely ask a question. Never. And no, no one asked me before.

My reasons are manifold, but I have three main ones: 1) she has very little personality besides ‘sad,’ 2) her entire character revolves around Sora and Roxas and, sometimes, Axel (she exists only for them), and 3) (and this one’s the hardest to accept, but painfully true) ...taking her out of the storyline actually makes it better, more streamlined, and more comprehensible.

It makes me sad, but these things make it impossible for me to really like her.

Look. Firstly, I need to say that I don’t hate her. My dislike for Aqua and Kairi is real, but my feelings for Xion are kind of... meh. I really don’t have strong feelings one way or the other. I liked her friendship with Axel and Roxas, sure, but the problem is that, for the most part, the ones acting, the ones doing, were Axel and Roxas. She merely reacted to these actions of theirs, oftentimes in an exact echo. If Roxas did something for her, she ended up doing the exact same thing for Roxas or Axel. She was like... like a puppy, being trained, though inadvertently, to do certain things on demand. She never felt like she was just doing something herself, save for when she decided to look into what was up with her and Castle Oblivion.

And I loved her interactions then. She felt real. She freaked out, got upset - she acted. I don’t mean act like fake or like she got violent or anything, but that she did something of her own volition, for her own goals and desires. She stood in opposition to Axel. She tested him, because she needed to know that she wasn’t alone and she truly felt as if she was. It was beautiful.

But then. Then her entire character started revolving around ‘I’m not real.’ Don’t get me wrong; this is believable - to a point. But it begins to make you wonder if there’s anything else to her. When is she going to respond? Like Hamlet, she just sat on the information and let it twist her up. It’s realistic, but it makes for a horrible story and a horrible character. Unlike Roxas, who raged and fought back and went on a warpath, she just... existed.

Look. Her interactions with Riku were poignant, even though they were by then coated in her ‘sadness as her one personality trait’ thing. They were good. I wanted more. I wanted her angry and hurting and doing. We just. Never got that. Because her acting would mitigate Roxas acting. She can’t do things, because if she did, then Roxas wouldn’t be able to do them later.

So she did nothing. She went back to the Organization and just... brooded. Sat staring at sunsets and talking cryptically to Roxas. She got threatened, and she backed down and let herself be manipulated and controlled. Again, it’s not unrealistic! It’s very real! But it made her passive. A damsel in distress in need of rescuing. And that’s essentially what she became, even with her keyblade. Until her having said keyblade only seemed to exacerbate her passivity and impotence. Even with the strength she showed at the end, it was all couched in the ‘I need saving; I’m helpless’ storyline.

That alone wasn’t enough to get me to dislike her, of course. A passive female character is pretty par for the course. So is the other thing that got me scowling - the sacrifice she made for the male characters. Female characters sacrificing, or being sacrificed, for the males is not new. It’s obnoxiously common.

I hate it.

So tickle me pissed when, just like Kairi and Namine, Xion was once again sacrificed for Sora. And she died for it. And what was her death about? Not her. Not really. It was about Roxas. She died as an instigator for him to act. Wonderful.

But again! This still isn’t enough for me to dislike her. It’s just enough for me to not like her, either. The thing that made me tip closer to dislike than like was when I started looking into a KH Rewrite.

Try as I might, I could not find a reason to add her in.

She’s the memories of Kairi that Sora had? That were put, not in Roxas, Xemnas’ pawn, but in a doll? As a back-up plan for Roxas, who was a back-up plan for Sora? A back-up plan that ended up failing, btw, since she and Roxas went back and forth with the keyblade and falling into comas. Seriously - and I mean this as kindly as possible - take a critical look at 358/2 Days. It’s padded. And how is it padded? By adding Xion. Without her in the story, it would have been a fairly quick bit about Roxas and Axel, about Roxas growing a heart and starting to get suspicious of the Organization. Imagine Roxas, our main character, finding out everything for himself, piece by piece, instead of Xion. Imagine him getting angry about being used and choosing for that reason alone to fight against Xemnas.

It’s a better story, isn’t it?

Because, as much as I don’t like saying it, adding Xion to the story only made it more muddled, more convoluted, and more unnecessarily long. She was a character created to pad things out and make a trio (like Sora, Riku, and Kairi). Hell, erasing Roxas made the KH story more streamlined overall, since it filled the plotholes of Sora moving without a body and the whole ‘Nobody wielding a keyblade even though Xemnas couldn’t’ thing and... sigh. Erasing Xion was just common sense. And I hate that. I hate how unnecessary she was to the plot, to the point where she could just be erased from the story and the minds of every single character, and nothing was lost. No gaps existed. The story continued on without a hiccup, without anything out of place. And that just should not be the case.

I’m sorry I can’t like Xion. I know she’s popular. I know she, like Kairi, is a victim of shitty writing. But she’s a character. In a story. The writing is all we have, and it’s what I am going to react to. And unfortunately, what we have is bad. So I just can’t like her. /shrugs/ Again. I’m sorry.

[skylanders-after-the-end]

Biochemical Daughter

The shimmering blue door leading inside Cloudcracker Prison opened itself, allowing Gearshift to enter, followed by Boom Bloom. It could only be accessed with a secret code that had to be typed in in front of the entrance. Of course, Gearshift had no trouble memorizing it nor any other security measures in the facility, so she was chosen to accompany Boom Bloom on her newest mission.

“Could you tell me why I’m here?” The Life Ninja was only told to travel to the prison and wait for the robot, but she had no idea why. “Are there any problems with the villains? Shouldn’t another Trap Master be doing this?”

“There have been repeated sightings in a distant desert. Witnesses say that they saw a golden palace rise from underneath the sand. It is safe to assume that that was the Golden Queen’s doing.” Gearshift kept the exact information she received stored in her memory drive, so that there were no misunderstandings of any sorts.

“That doesn’t answer my question.” While she was glad that they might have finally found the queen, Boom Bloom still didn’t understand her assignment.

“You have been chosen to go on a mission with a villain you should be familiar with.” The Tech Trap Master stopped to open another door before continuing their path along the smooth crystal floor. Eyes of several villains behind bars followed them with every step. “I was told you might react with displeasure and even anger, but since you know him better than anyone else, you are the best choice to accompany him and make sure that he does not try to escape or sabotage the mission.”

Boom Bloom had no response. She already knew who Gearshift was talking about, but she didn’t want to believe it. She wasn’t ready for this, she never anticipated this day.

Finally, the two Skylanders arrived at the cell of said villain. They looked inside as the foe turned around on his bed and just stared at them. “We interrogated the Doom Raiders about the Golden Queen and where she could have gone next, none of the villains held any useful information, besides Dr. Krankcase who admitted that he might have something that could help. He has a tracking device in his lair at the Wilikin Workshop. After some consideration, Spyro decided to allow him to return there under the supervision of a Skylander to find the machine and thus the queen.”

Krankcase couldn’t believe his own eyes. Boom Bloom, his most advanced and successful creation was finally face to face with him again. After her creation in his laboratory it didn’t take the mutant long to realize that she was working for a villain and leave, he never thought that he would see her again. And even while he pretended to be a Skylander himself, the Sensei always avoided any contact. “Boom Bloom, it’s been a while.” He tried speaking in the friendliest tone possible.

The Life Skylander returned no answer. She only gave him the same cold look as the last time she saw him during the prison event. She didn’t want to bother making amends with someone as evil and cunning as Krankcase, even if he was the closest thing to a father.

Gearshift opened the cell and immediately put handcuffs around the scientist’s wrists. “Good luck.” The robot stayed behind while the scientist and his creation walked towards the exit.

“I’m glad to see you again.” Krankcase made another attempt at a conversation. “I know you must hate me after everything, and I didn’t exactly better myself, but why don’t we use this as a fresh start?”

“Why don’t you just create another minion for a fresh start?” Without even looking at him, the snappy Skylander picked up her pace to get further away from the villain.

Krankcase knows that he’s made mistakes, and he hasn’t earned the Skylander’s trust, but after seeing his blooming creation again he felt something inside of him that he hasn’t felt in a very long time.

In the meantime, some Skylanders have gathered to discuss the seemingly endless hunt for the Golden Queen. Spitfire and Smash Hit were sitting at a table playing Skystones, a card game that’s become very popular again recently.

“We will never catch her.” Smash Hit started the conversation awfully negative, yet realistic. “It’s been months, and no one has even seen her.”

“Don’t be so pessimistic Smash.” Buckshot tried lighting the mood. “I mean yeah, the Skylands are endless, but she couldn’t have gotten that far.”

“Found her!” Spitfire exclaimed, which made everyone turn their heads towards him. “On the Skystone.” He grinned as he turned the stone in his hand around to show a picture of the queen. The others sighed and went on with their business while the fire spirit placed the card into the game.

“If only we had some way to track her down.” Enigma already used some of his spells, but none of them proved effective when they were looking for the queen.

“Yeah, if only.” Smolderdash had to keep quiet to not tell the others about Sprocket’s tracking device that had already located Golden Queen. She may be worried for her friend, but she was also confident that she could do it on her own.

Buckshot was playing around with one of his arrows when he looked over to Tidepool who was sitting at a nearby fountain gazing into the distance. The faun got on his feet and walked over to the lonely Sensei. “You alright Tidepool?”

“I am.” Tidepool gave a short answer while keeping her sight on the clouds passing by. “I’m just… worried about Wild Storm. The last time I saw him he almost lost control and- no I have to stop!” Tidepool shook her head and pushed herself up. “We have agreed on staying apart to figure things out, I have to stop thinking about him.”

Buckshot wasn’t sure what to say. After the knight’s outburst the archer went after him, but as soon as he found him, Wild Storm acted like nothing happened and didn’t talk about it again. He thought that a reunion is exactly what both need. “Hey, it’s completely fine that you think about him.”

Tidepool turned her head to look into Buckshot’s reassuring eyes. They didn’t talk much, but Buckshot was always very friendly and knew some of the best jokes among the Skylanders.

“You guys used to be best friends. Now that you don’t even talk anymore, of course you miss him.” The goat enjoyed Wild Storm’s company, but he always felt like the knight was missing something. “You know when you’re ready to talk to him again and when you are, you should just do it.”

Tidepool looked down on the ground and realized how much time has passed since they last spoke. It was more than she anticipated and maybe it was time to finally break the ice. “Maybe I should.”

The group’s activities were interrupted by a blinding pillar of light appearing nearby. They covered their eyes as a figure descended from the clouds and landed on the ground. It was Angelica, one of the Guardians that was out for Knight Light’s wings in case he couldn’t prove his worth as a Skylander.

“Is Knight Light here?” The wingless angel pulled her halo away from her head and used it as a screen upon her arrival.

“He’s on a mission as far as I know.” Spitfire got up from the table and moved towards the woman, with the others by his side.

“Then who’s in charge here?” Angelica looked through the group trying to determine who the leader could be.

Smash Hit realized that and wanted to tell her that none of them were. “Spyro, but he’s not-”

“I know about Spyro, but he’s obviously not here.” Angelica was already annoyed by the Skylanders and just wanted the conversation to be done with. “You Skylanders have some strange groups with separate leaders, is any of you one?”

Everyone looked over to Spitfire who was floating in the middle. “That would be me.” The speed demon was the leader of the Superchargers and thus possessed the highest authority.

“Good.” Angelica used her fingers to scroll across the screen on her halo and type some words before looking at the Fire Skylander again. “When you see Knight Light tell him that he’s been lacking regarding his performance. If he can’t prove to us that he is a determined Skylander, then we will have to take his wings back.”

“He’s been going on missions every day, multiple times even.” Enigma considered the judgement unfair and told the angel how hard the Trap Master has been working, since he already had to listen to it several times on their last excursion.

“Then he needs to do more! My superior is not happy with his performance.” Angelica closed the screen on her halo and was done with her work for the time being. She was about to leave when she suddenly spotted Tidepool and tilted her head. “You look familiar.”

Tidepool was confused after being addressed by someone she’s never seen before. “I do?”

“Yes.” Angelica had to think for a moment before recognizing the Skylander. “Weren’t you part of the Aqua-Marines?”

Tidepool was shocked to hear about her old group. They betrayed her after she was sent out to spy on the Skylanders before becoming one herself. “I used to be, but I left them.”

“And joined the Skylanders? What a shame.” Angelica smirked with pity. “That someone with supreme status degrades themselves to become a Skylander. You’re just like Knight.”

Tidepool’s eyes widened with disbelief and she was about to counter the insult before Buckshot stepped in. “Are you done here?”

“Thank the heavens I am.” Angelica created another pillar of light that engulfed her before she began to rise back towards the sky. “I’m sure this won’t be the last time we meet, so unfortunately until next time.”

The Skylanders looked after the angel with irritated expressions as she left. They chatted about her rude attitude before going back to their business. Enigma however stayed on the same spot and kept looking up to the sky. He started to understand why Knight Light left that place. He didn’t wait much longer and decided to look for the Light Skylander and warn him about this threat himself.

On the Stealth Stinger heading to the Fantasm Forest, Stealth Elf was using the abilities she learned during her time as a Supercharger to navigate through the several trees and branches in the area. She found an empty spot in the midst of some cottages and landed there. As soon as she got out of the vehicle, the Life Skylander started looking for High Volt, who was supposed to meet her there.

“Stealth Elf, there you are!” With a hint of impatience, High Volt greeted the elf as soon as he saw her.

“Hello High Volt, what’s the problem?” The assassin already pulled out her deadly daggers as she looked out for trouble.

“Nothing you will need your weapons for.” High Volt explained, causing Stealth Elf to make her daggers disappear again. “I’ve found two witnesses in a nearby bar, they were talking about a woman covered in gold. I figured that must have been the Golden Queen, so I went to speak to them, but they refused to give me any more information. They said they wouldn’t talk to an… officer.”

Stealth Elf giggled after High Volt told her about the common mistake others tend to make. While he was an officer to the Skylanders, for everyone else he was simply a Skylander just like the elf or any other one of them. “So, you think they will talk to me?”

“They’re elves as well, they might be more cooperative towards their own kind.” The goldling still grumbled about the rejection and crossed his arms.

“Fine, I’ll see what I can do.” The Skylanders parted their ways and High Volt left the forest town while Stealth Elf went looking for the bar the Supercharger was talking about.

The elf admired the vast and unharmed nature across the islands. It was one of the few places where most of the plants were untouched and the inhabitants worked with nature, not against it. After checking many of the relatively small houses, Stealth Elf finally found one with a telling sign hanging above the door. It pictured a beer glass filled to the brim with the beverage, an obvious indicator of a bar. The Skylander nodded to herself and opened the door, unknowing of who she would meet inside that building.

Boom Bloom and Krankcase have arrived at the Wilikin Workshop. After a short journey on foot without an exchange of words, they reached at the doctor’s lair. After all those years it still had a giant metal sculpture of Krankcase’s head attached to the front. Boom Bloom sighed as she entered the building she hasn’t seen ever since her creation.

“Where is the machine we’re looking for?” Boom Bloom’s tone was harsh and made it clear that she wanted the mission to be over with as soon as possible.

“It should be in the basement, that’s where I kept my most valuable creations.” The Doom Raider looked at Boom Bloom, hoping that she would remember that he also kept her down there, but the mutant didn’t even bother to give him a look.

The Life Ninja took the stairs leading to the basement. She remembered all the machines and structures scattered throughout the building, but she didn’t want to waste her time looking at them. Krankcase attempted to stay closer to the Skylander by moving his wooden legs faster, but Boom Bloom always moved away as soon as he got too close. After a short search, Boom Bloom picked up a device with a screen and a small satellite dish on top of it.

“Is this it?” She observed the object and turned it around, until she saw a sign which said ‘Tracking Device’ to confirm her assumption.

“Yes, I should be able to reprogram it so it can track down Golden Queen.” Krankcase looked around curiously when he finally spotted something in a corner. “Here, this should help.” He picked up one of his barrell minions that he created in masses, only this one has been turned into a golden statue after the queen’s first and only visit to the lab.

“So, you kept creating your own little servants.” Boom Bloom was disgusted at the sight of another mindless being only created to follow the villain’s orders.

“They’re just robots, they weren’t created to think and express free will so it’s fine.” Krankcase always had an unfortunate way with words, but he never truly meant to hurt anyone’s feelings, only their bodies.

“Is that what I was supposed to be?” Boom Bloom broke the silence and finally expressed the feelings she’s been bottling up for so long. “Just a mindless minion?”

“No, of course not Bloom.” Krankcase wanted to make it up to the plant mutant and moved closer to hold her, but the Skylander immediately backed off.

“Don’t touch me! I don’t want anything to do with you!” Boom Bloom turned around and rushed up the stairs to leave the factory. Krankcase quickly followed and caught up to her by running across the walls and landing in front of her as soon as she reached the next floor.

“Boom Bloom, please. I just want to talk.” The scientist had a desperate look in his eyes. Even though he was a villain, he always deeply cared about Boom Bloom.

“I don’t care what you want!” The Life Skylander shouted with rage. “You have no idea how I feel because of you!”

Krankcase took a step back after the ninja’s violent reaction. He didn’t expect her to be this angry about everything. “But I created you.”

“That’s the problem!” Boom Bloom took a deep breath and calmed herself down before continuing. “You made me to be evil. One of your servants that could take the Skylanders down. But I never wanted that and… and it made me feel bad.” Boom Bloom revealed a fear which she tried to hide from everyone, including herself. “The Skylanders all accepted me, but I couldn’t stop thinking about you. How I’m supposed to be an enemy. How I should be evil.”

Krankcase had no idea how deeply affected the mutant was by this. He didn’t see her being a hero coming back then, but he also didn’t think that it would put her through such a crisis. “When I started experimenting with plants and organic life, it was one failure after the other. I didn’t have the required experience for results.” Krankcase thought that telling Boom Bloom about her creation process would help her. “But then I saw you. Even though I failed before, I was certain that it would work with you, and it did!” A smile appeared on the doctor’s green face and Boom Bloom listened for once. “At first, I wanted to make an army consisting of your clones, but when I saw that you were a fully capable living being, something changed. I felt… whole.” To Krankcase, Boom Bloom always felt like the daughter he never had, and it broke his heart to watch her reject him. “Something about the fact that I created a new being made me realize that maybe there is more to life than validation and success. You made me realize that.”

There was silence. The two didn’t say a word and only looked at each other. Boom Bloom had mixed feelings about everything, but Krankcase was hoping that she would finally see what she truly meant to him. The moment was interrupted by a loud crash. Boom Bloom lost the ground underneath her feet and began to fall down. The Life Skylander swiftly reacted by using her thorn whip to grab onto a wooden bar near the ceiling. After she abruptly stopped falling, the mutant held onto her weapon with one hand while the rest of her body was dangling in mid-air.

Krankcase was thrown back by the explosive crash and had to get himself up and adjust his hat before he dashed to the edge of the hole which had appeared in the middle of the floor. He thought about why this could have happened, but then he remembered one of his risky security measures. “This must have been the collapse that happens when a Skylander remains in my lab for more than ten minutes!”

Boom Bloom could only give him an angered look as she tried not to fall into the pool of boiling green goo underneath her. While Krankcase was looking for a way to fix everything, the wooden bar that the whip grabbed onto was starting to crack. It wasn’t able to hold Boom Bloom’s weight anymore and finally broke, leaving the Skylander falling towards her demise again. Krankcase stared at the scene in utter shock and didn’t know what to do. After a lot of hesitation, he gained the courage to grab the last piece of the thorn whip, shortly before Boom Bloom would have landed in the goo. Krankcase held onto the weapon with all his strength. The sharp thorns cut through the fabric of his gloves and pierced his hands to the point where blood was dripping down, but the scientist didn’t let go. He pulled the whip towards him and used the increased power of his spider legs to pull Boom Bloom back up.

The Skylander was on the edge of the enormous hole, panting from exhaustion and shock. Krankcase completely ignored the pain in his hands and dashed to the Sensei. “Are you alright? Did you get hurt?”

“I’m fine.” Boom Bloom took a few more moments to recover before she looked at Krankcase. She gasped after seeing his hands all covered in blood. “Your hands…”

Krankcase briefly looked at his injured body parts before directing his sight to the plant again. “Don’t worry about it.”

Another moment of silence occurred, but Krankcase made sure that there wasn’t any more danger. He used the situation to finally talk with the Skylander up close. “When you denied me and ran away to become a Skylander, I was afraid they wouldn’t accept you because you’re one of my creations.”

Boom Bloom couldn’t believe that those words were true, but he had no reason to lie.

“But I’m glad they did, even if that made you my enemy.” Krankcase admired Boom Bloom’s natural beauty for another moment. “And I never stopped loving you.”

The Skylander was speechless. For all those years she thought that Krankcase hated her, but it was the opposite. She couldn’t help but feel bad about being so cruel to him. Maybe he isn’t as bad as she thought after all.

“However, I think we failed the mission.” Krankcase commented while they looked down to see the basement, which is now covered with the toxic green substance of the lab. The tracking device was nowhere to be seen.

“I don’t think we failed.” Boom Bloom was upset about the machine but realized that there is something far more important she found today. “We fulfilled another mission. One that was long overdue.” The villain looked at Boom Bloom with confusion until he got what she meant. He was about to lead the way out of the lab before the Skylander stopped him. “Hey.”

Krankcase turned around and looked at the ninja, waiting for her to say more. “Thank you...” Boom Bloom wanted to add more, but only after some hesitation could she say it. “Dad.”

Krankcase smiled and looked at his daughter with the proudest look any parent could give their child.

Stealth Elf opened the wooden door leading to the inside of the bar. Everyone stopped whatever they were doing for a brief moment and looked at the elf before going back to their business. The assassin took a few steps and looked around. There were only plant mutants and other life-based creatures sitting at the tables, no sign of the elves High Volt mentioned. Stealth Elf made her way to an empty table, hoping she could take a better look when she wasn’t in the center of attention. Suddenly, she could hear something right before she was about to sit down.

“Pssst.” The Life Skylander turned around to see two cloaked figures sitting at a table. “Sit with us.”

Stealth Elf listened to the ominous voice and sat across the table, facing the hooded strangers. “Who are you?”

The strangers removed their cloaks, freeing their long pointy ears and revealing white glowing eyes on their green faces. They were elves. “We’re just like you!” The female elf said with a more cheerful tone.

Stealth Elf widened her eyes after seeing the two who almost appeared like her reflection in a mirror. It wasn’t every day that she saw other elves. “Are you the elves that saw a golden woman?” The Skylander didn’t waste any time by asking them personal questions and instead got right to the point.

“Oh no, we didn’t see her.” The male elf responded. “We heard it from someone who heard it from someone who saw her.”

Stealth Elf was disappointed, but she was hoping they would tell her more than High Volt. “Do you at least know where she was seen?”

“Just that she’s in some desert, but- wait.” The female elf was about to continue when she squinted her eyes and observed the Skylander suspiciously. “Did the officer send you?”

“What?” Stealth Elf was perplexed and didn’t understand why that mattered, so she wanted to explain the situation. “I’m a Skylander and so is the officer you met. The golden woman you heard of is the Golden Queen and we’ve been looking for her for months.”

“Well that explains a lot.” The male elf looked at his companion and then back to Stealth Elf. “How come an elf like you ended up as a Skylander? I never heard of many elf Skylanders.”

“Me?” Stealth Elf was irritated that they were drifting away from the topic, but she realized that she had to play along if she wanted to get answers. “I never grew up in a typical elf village. When I was an infant I was abandoned in the woods and raised by a forest ninja…”

Stealth Elf continued telling her story, but the elves stopped listening after the part where she got abandoned. They just looked at each other with shock and disbelief while Stealth Elf remained unusually open. “Wait, you were abandoned in a hollow tree as a baby?”

Stealth Elf stopped talking and stared at the female elf who eagerly waited for an answer. “I never said that I was left in a tree.”

The female elf covered her mouth while both of them kept their eyes on the assassin. Stealth Elf wasn’t sure how they knew about that seemingly unimportant detail, but then it hit her. “Wait, are you-”

The elves looked at each other again and then back at Stealth Elf, the female’s eyes started to tear up. “It’s you.” The male elf said with relief in his voice.

Stealth Elf pushed herself up and away from the table. She kept staring at the elves as hundreds of thoughts were racing through her head. She had so many questions, but finally she could only ask one. “You’re my parents?”

[complicatedandstained]

The Other Day at Hot Topic: Heartless

“You’re giving me this look like I’m crazy.” Aqua’s kneeling next to a spilled box of accessories, trying to make all the mismatched objects fit again, so that they can be carted around and placed. She reminds Roxas vaguely of a young mom stealing her kid’s stuff for a garage sale.  

“Uh…yup.” Roxas has moved to stand beside her, with the intention of helping her out and getting some answers, god damn it, but now he’s not sure how to do either. The box is mostly full and he’s not entirely sure what he just heard Aqua and Vanitas discussing.  

A band? A video game? Creatures from the deep?

“I take it nobody told you about the Heartless yet,” she concludes with a light, knowing smile.

“Uh...nope?” Roxas agrees finally, picking up a Game of Thrones eye shadow palette that had slid over beside his foot and offering it to her. She smiles, and Roxas’ chest lightens a bit, relieved her anger has abated after his argument with that dick Vanitas, and she seems to be willing to give him a second chance. Mainly because dark Aqua had been the stuff nightmares are made of.

“They didn’t have you watch all the training videos?” 

Roxas shrugs, opening a palm. “Saïx showed me, like, the video on shoplifting: ‘Be nice and hope for the best.’” Okay, so it had been a little more complicated than that, but just a little. “But that was really all…”

“Mhmm,” Aqua nods thoughtfully, standing. Settling the box on her hip, she steps behind the checkout counter and deposits it on the narrow space between the computer monitor and a display box. “Saïx only shows the official training videos.”

She looks to Roxas, who follows her behind the register, unsure what he should be doing and apparently appearing concerned enough that she puts on her comforting voice, sets a hand on the counter between them like she wants to pat him in sympathy, but they just met so it’d be weird.

“Don’t be upset with him, though. He’s just trying not to get sacked. You know, Axel told me once the closest Hot Topic to us has been through at least five managers since Saïx has started. Which is probably why Saïx can be such a fun-suck.”

Sympathy tugs at Roxas’ heartstrings. He wonders if it’s ever occurred to Demyx and Vanitas that part of the reason Saïx is so strict is because he’s under pressure of his own. Mostly, Saïx has been professional and polite. Well, except when he’s mocking them all mercilessly, in his blink-and-you-miss-it deadpan, but Roxas kind of admires that.   

“I really don’t think he’s…I mean he’s actually kind of hilarious if you pay attention to literally anything that comes out of his mouth...”

Aqua isn’t listening any more. With the large box blocking her from the eyes of any customers that might wander in, (and this early, there aren’t likely to be any), she has fished out her smartphone and begun swiping through screens. “Here. I think I still have a copy…”

The discussion halts as the video starts with a loud, electric guitar thrum, and the phone exchanges hands.

“HEY HOTTIES!”

The tiny screen erupts into sensory overload. An explosion of flames, the sound of an engine backfiring, and heavy rock music smash together; the words “HOT TOPIC TRAINING VIDEO #2” flashing white across the black, flaming screen.

Demyx appears with black, star shaped sunglasses perched on his forehead, wearing a white shirt with black cap sleeves and a realistic image of the head and neck of duckling peeking up from the bottom half.

“My name’s Demyx, in the place to be!” he raps, a la Hamilton, arms spreading, and the camera zooms out. They’re in Hot Topic, of course.

The cameraman starts to beatbox. He’s not terrible. Keeps a steady rhythm, at least.

“Got my new best friend—Zexion—workin’ with me!”

The lyrics, those are terrible.

Demyx wraps an arm around a shorter man, Zexion’s, shoulders. He has silvery blue emo bangs, straight posture, and the expression of someone who would rather be literally anywhere else.

“Alright, wait,” Zexion interrupts, shrugging free of the arm, twisting to face the golden retriever of a dude. “Firstly, we just met today.”

“Yeah,” Demyx’s grin could blind, “but I can just tell.”

“Secondly,” Zexion’s arms cross, unimpressed, “if this is going to be a rap video, I am not participating.”

Demyx’s processes this for a moment with a frown, and a just as sudden smile. “You can rap too!”

Zexion stares for a moment as if offering Demyx an opportunity to use his brain cells, and when that doesn’t happen, starts to leave.

“Wait. Zexion!” Demyx scrambles after him, off camera, with the cameraman laughing hysterically in the background in a voice that’s distinctively Axel’s. “Wait!”

“Oh God,” Roxas runs fingers down his face in second-hand embarrassment. “Is the whole thing like this?”

Aqua giggles, fingertips to her lips, shakes her head and smirks. “Don’t worry. It gets worse.”

Demyx has returned to the center of the screen, his shoulders and lips weighed down with dejection. “Looks like it’s just me.”

“You start rapping again, and I’m pulling the plug,” teases the cameraman. Definitely Axel.

“Your camera doesn’t even have a plug, Axel, so there.” Demyx plants his fists on his hips and sticks out his tongue.

The video shuts off.  

Roxas snorts loudly. Aqua shakes her head again wistfully and steps up to Roxas’ side to see better.

“Hey ya, Hotties,” greets a new voice, cocky, gruff and slow, like a Southerner turned surfer. It belongs to a brunette man around Luxord’s age. He tugs at one of the lapels of his leather jacket. He’s dressed like the head of a biker gang and wears a ponytail and eyepatch like he’d rather be a pirate. When he gestures to the camera, tattoos appear at his wrists.

“I think that’s Xigbar,” Aqua offers in response to the miffed expression on Roxas’ face.

“We’re here today to talk to you about:”

“CUSTOMER SERVICE!” Demyx enthuses from beside him, hands folding, grin bright and then flickering. “We were going to rap for you, but I was outvoted.”

The easily disheartened blonde bows his head and Xigbar smiles down at him like he can think of better uses for Demyx’s mouth than busting rhymes.

“There, there, sugar,” he soothes, mildly taunting. A beefy arm wraps Demyx’s shoulder, his hand patting lightly.

When Demyx cuddles into the older, taller man’s grip, Roxas kind of wants to vomit. It feels a little like watching a bunny cuddle up to a king cobra.

Reenergized by the less than selfless show of support, Demyx remembers his spiel, continuing brightly, “Most of the people who walk into Hot Topic are—”

“Middle school girls?” Xigbar cuts in, brows bouncing.

Demyx freezes. There’s a loud snort behind the camera.

Demyx nods, even his smile going still before he manages to concede with an eye roll, “Right, okay, true.” Demyx elbows Xigbar in the ribs for his interruption, and Xigbar’s confident grin brightens, though Demyx gets away with it unscathed.

“But most of our paying customers here at Hot Topic are total nerds,” Demyx insists. The screen flashes to a man with a silvery blond ponytail and a light brown sweater vest over white and blue plaid leaning across the checkout counter.

“Vexen,” Aqua identifies, when Roxas’ gaze flicks up to her. “Fired.”

“And BAMFs.” The screen cuts to Xigbar giving a cheeky, two fingered salute.

“Quit,” Aqua tacks on.

“And even nerdy BAMFs.” Cut to Axel threading a blue and gold striped scarf around Saïx’s neck, as Saïx rolls his eyes and turns his head to hide a wry smile.

“Messy,” she—admits, maybe.

So, the guys are friends. Roxas, notes, bemused. Weird.

“All living in harmony!” Demyx concludes, appearing back on screen, hands clapping together.

Eye patch guy snorts, turning toward Demyx. “Why do you keep saying ‘BAMFs’ like it’s a thing.” He leans in closer than strictly necessary, another smirk teasing his lips. “It’s not a thing.”

Demyx turns as well, eyes widening, hands opening in front of him, emphatically. “This is a training video, Xigbar! I can’t just say BAMF.”

Xigbar backhands Demyx’s shoulder. “Pussy.”

Demyx startles back a step. “I don’t think you can say that either.”

“I just did.”

Demyx sighs, like, after all this, he is just now realizing Xigbar is here to fuck with him. “Never mind, Ax’ll edit it out. My point is,” he regains his enthusiasm, the camera zooms in, “most of our customers are awesome, refined, sophisticated human beings.”

Cut to footage of Luxord and Xigbar at a table in a sunroom, dressed in black clothes and silver chains, sipping tea from white china cups and reading newspapers, while classical music plays in the background.

Roxas abruptly chokes and Aqua offers a light giggle, though whether to Roxas’ reaction or the tea party, he can’t be sure. He takes back his judgment of Xigbar. He must have liked Demyx quite a bit to do that.

“They say things like…” prompts Demyx’s voiceover as the camera pans to Zexion with his Hot Topic lanyard standing with a tall man with dramatic, manicured sideburns and a ponytail of thick dreads.

“Thank you for your help.”

It’s like the British Invasion in here.

“I met him,” Roxas recalls.

Aqua tilts the phone and squints, “Xaldin. He’s our number two.”

Roxas breathes out a ‘huh?’

“Assistant manager. Saïx’s second in command. Person you go to when something goes wrong and you don’t want to get fired over it.”

“But I thought that was—” The video cuts Roxas off.

“And,” Demyx narrates.

Cut to Zexion behind the register and Xaldin in front.

“I’m sorry, sir. Your Hot Cash is expired.” Zexion does not seem the least bit sorry.

“Okay, no problem.” Xaldin does not seem the least bit concerned.

Back to Demyx and the leering pirate. “However, not all of our customers are quite so delightful,” Demyx narrates, sadly.

“Some of them seem to have had the life and joy sucked straight out of ‘em,” Xigbar continues, cheerily.

“We call these customers…” prompts Demyx.

“Heartless,” both announce and it’s back to the black screen with the flames and the word appearing in typical Hot Topic font. This fades back to Demyx and Xigbar.

“The Heartless are the customers that make you want to quit,” explains Demyx.

“Or punch a wall,” Xigbar interjects.

“Or roll up in a corner and cry while clutching a teddy bear and a box of Twinkies.”

Xigbar starts, turns. The camera zooms in. Roxas isn’t sure if Axel is an asshole or a comic genius. Xigbar’s hand falls onto Demyx’s upper arm, tone low, “Demy, baby,…you, okay?”

Demyx’s eyes widen, deer-like, and he attempts a smile. “...Fine.”

“Demy…” Xigbar growls and yanks him off screen.

“For example,” Axel’s voice cuts in to keep the ball rolling.

Cut to a tall, blonde woman with a pixie cut looming over the cashier. She’s dressed in a lacy black bandeau, distressed, pale denim shorts, and red heels that could stab a man.

Roxas immediately recognizes her from the staff meeting. “Larxene.”

“I demand to speak to your manager, you good for nothing spoon,” she growls at one employee.

“My Hot Cash doesn’t expire until I say it expires!” she hollers at the next.

“I’m going to call your management and see to it that you’re fired,” she hisses to the third.

“Okay.” The final cashier, a tall, lanky blonde man with hair spiked up like Roxas’ merely blinks. “So, did you want your receipt or not?

Roxas finds himself cackling again. “How long did they spend making this?”

“They had one afternoon while Saïx was at a conference.”

The camera finds Demyx and Xigbar again in a different part of the store. Demyx’s grin is all dimples and sunshine, and Xigbar has Demyx’s sunglasses tucked into the white tee under his leather jacket.

“But do not fear the Heartless, new staff member!” Demyx cheers. “For every Heartless you face down, Luxord will give you a point in his secret mission report notebook. Whoever has the shittiest month gets a prize!”

“Uh, I think he keeps them on his iPhone, Dem,” Xigbar corrects, not rudely. Another bark of laughter from Axel.  

“Shh,” Demyx whispers in Xigbar’s ear, tugging at his collar, super unnecessarily. “That’s way lamer.”

“Tell them what happens if they win, Lucky,” Xigbar says, gesturing to the side, obviously trying to distract Demyx.  

It works. Demyx rushes off camera to haul Luxord onto the screen. “Yeah! What can we win, Lucky?”

Luxord seems cool and collected even as he’s bodily dragged forward. He stops centerstage, when Demyx releases him, brushing himself off. “Each month, everyone who wants in contributes cash, candy, or assorted other worthy prizes.” He stares down the camera with cool blue eyes, as if in personal challenge. “Winner takes it all. Fortune favors the bold.”

Roxas is pretty sure Luxord just quoted Mamma Mia.  

“It’s a surprise!” Demyx gushes, clinging to the biker looking guy’s sleeve.

“I need a fucking tranquilizer for you, kid,” Xigbar mumbles fondly, mussing Demyx’s pompadour mohawk, and earning a playful tackle in response.

“And we cut there,” Axel announces. “Nobody needs to see that.”

The screen goes black. The fire and rock music start up again and the names of everyone in the video flash on-screen briefly all at once and just as abruptly disappear.

The video blinks off.