#but i wanna actually had a concrete idea what im working with

[jeremiahthefroge]

Unironically, IS there anywhere to get a good beat-by-beat plot synopsis of the original Minecraft Diaries without watching it all the way through? I want to get a good idea of all the plot beats and characters and the general timeline to see about writing some fanfic, because the characters are living rent free in my brain, but I'm also like... VERY aware that it's a 2016 minecraft roleplay series... and I fear that I will ruin my own mental image of the series if I try to rewatch it all...

[ilostyou]

5sos said it's so hard to watch everything i want spinning down the drain which is true however. even worse than that is not even getting to watch everything spin down the drain bc you thought everything was actually fine and the drain was plugged and nothing was going anywhere so your attention wanders a bit and you come back thinking everything is still fine except it's not bc everything you ever wanted disappeared while you were weren't looking while it was completely out of your control while you were under the assumption it was all fine so you didn't even have the chance to process the fact that it might ever go away that everything you want could spin down the drain or is actively spinning down the drain bc everything was fine it was all supposed to be fine

[valeriianz]

For the fic writer asks:

4. Obviously you did research for BitB. I'd love you to ramble about it if you like I'm sure you've got STORIES

5. Did you outline it?

7. How'd you decide it would be Hob's pov?

25-27 I'd love to know a/some favorite lines, details, and any lore you might want to share

omg TJ what wonderful questions! thank you!! this is going to get LONG!

4: Rambling about research!

do you wanna see a screen shot of my bookmarks under my "band au" folder?

man, and that's only what could fit on the screen.

there is... SO MUCH i chose to ignore for this fic. ideas that i had to drop, lines or extra details about the other band members equipment. more logistics, what Lucienne actually does, what Mervyn has to put up with as the new touring stage manager... i realized very early on that i couldn't possibly cram all this (super cool and eye opening) information into the fic and still keep reader's interest and, most importantly, to not stray away from the fact that this is a dreamling fic. whenever i felt myself getting carried away with a side character or job or even social media numbers, gossip, outside POVs, i had to reign myself in and get back on track. there will be time for exploring everything i missed in side stories after BitB is finished. i just hope i still have the energy to write it all.

once, i was so deep into research that after publishing chapter 2, i went into work and when my chef asked what "GA" meant on my prep list, i answered with full confidence, "general admission."

(it means "get ahead.")

the worst part of this entire writing process is im still learning new shit. i havent rewatched or read a lot of what i've saved because, to be very honest, i was feeling a little burnt out. it's why we're kinda full steam dreamling now. it's why ive been glossing over a lot of technical stuff and being vague about conversations amongst the crew/not including it at all. i don't prefer ignoring my research, but at the end of the day i want to still enjoy writing this fic and finish it. even if i can't be as descriptive and detailed and nuanced as i used to be.

5: Did you outline the fic?

(also asked by @hardly-an-escape!)

i wouldn't call what i have a proper "outline," it's more like a 20k word document filled to the brim with notes that i skim at least a dozen times while i'm writing a new chapter (being in my brain is literally hell). i live multichapter life very dangerously. i copy and paste lines or sections (always scattered, never together! augh!) that are meant to go together and plop them in a new document titled "band au ch.#" and then i structure the chapter around what i want to happen.

but to answer this question in the plainest of terms: yeah. i know exactly what's going to happen up until the very end. even if its all in my head and the only concrete shit that's written down are beats/plot points. i'll figure out the rest later!

7: How'd you decide it would be Hob's POV?

i actually never even considered writing it from Dream's POV. this was my first fic in the fandom (which is so nuts to think about lol) and writing in Dream's POV sounded so scary lol. i also just thought Hob's would be easier because i have worked a few backstage shows, back in my college years. i figured eh, i can make this work. and i loved exploring how weird and mysterious musicians can be, from a normie's POV. making Hob a fan first and having him worry about developing a parasocial relationship... it was fun to explore.

25: Share your favorite line

oh god, i have so many haha.

“What are you thinking about?” starting in ch.2 and onward lmao

“It’s–” Dream laughs quietly, bitterly. “I don’t like change.” He says each word with emphasis, eyes trailing down to fixate somewhere past Hob. “And I still hold onto the things I can control, like my instruments–” his eyes swing up to regard Hob apologetically. “Or my clothes or my–” he brings a hand up and wiggles his fingers around his head. “My hair.” ch.4

"His majesty is pleased." ch.5

“You are obsessive,” he states, slow and cool and with a quiet smile cracking through his composure. “Just like me.” ch.7

“You look good.” Hob has to lean in to say so, unwilling to raise his voice amongst the roar of the fans. ch.11

“Del looks like porcelain, but she’s actually made of steel.” Desire swirls the contents of their glass before pushing their shoulders back with a deep breath. “She's tougher than all of us.” ch.11

“Everything. I want…” his fingers tighten in Hob’s hair, pulling him closer, speaking against his lips. “…Everything.” ch.14

26: Share your favorite detail

how intentionally coy Dream behaves. i love keeping him a mystery and deciding when and how much to allow his intentions to peek through has been so fun lol.

Despair is in fact covered in tattoos and piercings! i say this because i feel like sometimes i forget lmao. (but also her and Hob don't interact much so. my bad haha).

Delirium's constant explosion of color in the way she dresses <3

Hob's dedication to his job, Dream, and the people he cares about the most. i don't care if people think i'm making him too soft and good, im gonna project on that man and make him a sweet, sweet simp lmao

and ah, this doesn't matter anymore, and i kinda regret doing it but. i originally had Dream's favorite bass all black but the pickguard was white. so it actually looked like Jessamy. not gonna lie when @designtheendless drew it all black i decided i liked it better that way. and truly i do. that's when i went back to ch.1 and changed it haha. to actually see the guitar with Dream, all done up sparkling black and purple flecks... gosh it's just so him. but then i got up to the reveal that the guitar's name was Jessamy and i was like, "oh, right." lmao. no one seems to care so i'll leave it be.

27: Share a piece of lore you made up for the story

i have a lot lmao. and this post is already so long... im hoping i can get to some if not all of it in side fics in the future. but for now, here's some that's more like headcanons but:

Dream hates flying. he can full on go into panic attacks on the plane if he allows himself to get into his own head.

this was mentioned briefly in ch.4, while Dream was discussing the formation of the band, but Despair was in another band before joining Endless. she is the only character in the fic who gets to keep her English roots (lol sorry) and is the oldest in the band (30).

all of the band members ages: Dream, Desire, and Death are all 28 and Delirium is 22.

Dream can experience subdrop after going too hard during a performance.

Dream paints his own nails, it's very therapeutic.

as an exercise, i explored my own headcanons for Dream in this verse in a word doc, and one thing i will share from it that you might find interesting: If I were to ever give Dream a theological values, I would describe him as a satanist. He is a physical and pragmatic person, nonconforming, and although he is introverted, he enjoys being a part of a community (he loves his band).

also found this in my notes: How Desire and Dream got along was Death making them fight it out. Hob raises an eyebrow “like in a brawl?” He couldn't imagine Desire throwing hands. “No, in a pillow fight that escalated in hair pulling and verbal taunts.”

fic writer asks

[lemonflavoreddishsoap]

Hello there!! Idk if I have already sent something in, but if I haven’t, I would love to request! May I please have the LS members’ (separate) reactions to a new member with “soulless” or “dead” eyes (basically like the anime eyes that have no shine in them), who always seems rather closed off, but at some point the members do something nice to them, and the reader blushes and their eyes just light up like the brightest stars? Sorry if this request is a lot! If it is you can ignore! But thank you so much! (I loved the housewife s/o HCs you wrote btw, they were lovely!) ❤️❤️

Ghiaccio pfp twinsies...woag- also i like this idea a lot!! this reader sounds absolutely wonderful <33 fair warning I wrote most of these while incredibly sleepy so if they're ooc that's probably why im so sorry-

------------------------------------------------------------

La Squadra with a reader who has soulless eyes (that light up when they're happy/flustered)

Formaggio

When he first saw you, he wasn't sure exactly how alive you were.

I mean, those empty eyes and the way you barely talked to anyone definitely had him raising an eyebrow at first.

But he quickly got used to it. Nothing was wrong with responding to a joke with a tiny smile instead of a hearty laugh.

In fact, with enough time, he grows rather comfortable around that blank stare of yours. He gives you your space, but whenever you do talk to him, he's more than happy to get the chance to hear your voice and chat.

One day, before you went out for a mission, Formaggio noticed you nearly forgot to bring something vital. He managed to catch up to you and give you the item before you left, but before he could say anything, he noticed your expression.

The color spread across your cheeks, and your eyes -Oh god, your EYES. It was like someone finally flipped on a light switch in them. They were full of life for once, and the sight had him speechless.

But- shit, right, you had to leave. With an absent-minded nod and pat on the shoulder, he began to walk away.

"No need to thank me," he shouted to you before he was out of sight - and it was true. The look on your face had been thanks enough.

Illuso

Definitely made fun of your empty eyes often. Like Formaggio he probably compares you to a zombie, but he is willing to say it out loud.

He tries to guess what your thinking and feeling all the time if you tend to not show emotion. Like he'd say things like "I bet you're pissed about that too, you just don't wanna show it."

But like. In an annoying way if that makes sense.

I'll be honest I can't think of what kind of nice thing he would do for you. This dude's section has haunted me for days, y'all.

But in the event of him doing nice for you, he notices your expression right away. boy is he surprised by it. and boy is he LOUD about it.

"Holy SHIT! You're actually alive! I managed to break that moody façade of yours?"

You might wanna walk away or hide your face before he calls the rest of the gang over to look.

Afterwards he's weirdly a bit nicer to you? He obviously wants to see your adorable expression again, but his exact intentions are unknown...

Prosciutto

Doesn't care in much of a usual way. If anything I think he would comment on how your hard to read expressions and closed off nature makes you good for the job.

So he never really bothers to think you may be any other way.

The two of you were set to go on a mission together, and he insisted you work on a concrete plan beforehand. It turns out his idea for the plan relies VERY heavily on your abilities/stand.

When you ask about it, he begins to talk about how strong your abilities are, and how perfect you would be for the job, how he has faith that you can pull it all off.

Your heart flutters at his words and with every compliment you feel heat rush to your face.

When he stops talking and notices how your eyes lit up, he's....genuinely unsure what to think.

It was all true, you were strong and the right person for the job, but we all know how he gets when he's working with someone he feels is a bit too vulnerable cough cough pesci

He doesn't worry about it for the time being - it's a one time thing after all - but he keeps an eye out for if it happens again.

Pesci

I think he is used to people thinking he looks strange/creepy, so even it might creep him out a bit, he tries to be nice about your soulless face.

Gives you your space, but this boy is sweet, it won't take long for him to do something that makes the darkness in your eyes fade away.

idk why my first thought for the moment is him baking something new and asking you to try it. You have a taste and quickly nod in approval, it's delicious.

Relieved, Pesci proceeds to let you know he made it because he remembered you mentioning [insert flavor here] was your favorite flavor. Yep, that'll do it.

He's incredibly caught off guard, seeing your eyes twinkle with appreciation - for a second he thinks you're about to cry! He stands there, unsure what to do, until either the interaction ends or you say something to him.

Is so overwhelmed afterwards no matter what happens - was that really the real you? That sweet face was really yours?

Melone

It literally doesn't matter to him - he can see right through your dead look. It's uncanny.

You could be completely stone-faced and he would find some way to be able to tell exactly how you feel about something. He'll tell you his predictions too to see if their right.

I imagine it's one of these moments that actually leads to him seeing that cute expression of yours.

It started with "you found that hilarious, didn't you?"

He was playing his guessing game again, and like every time before, he was right. You didn't even have to answer.

"You know, you're so interesting to read. You have all these little tells for every small thought, and I think you subconsciously change them a bit every time I take notice of them!" He suddenly began explaining to you.

But it didn't stop there, he began to tell you all about how he picked apart your body language, how he noticed changes in your emotions over the entire time he's known you. "You're.... fascinating to watch."

It's not until he finishes talking that you both realize you've been staring at him with a completely uncharacteristically bright look of wonder. Then it's his turn for his face to light up, pointing at the blush on your cheeks.

"So you do like how I watch you! I knew it."

Ghiaccio

"The hell are you giving me that look for!?"

Of COURSE he takes it personally a lot - especially if you're supposed to be listening to his rambling. He isn't exactly thinking straight, so he just thinks your blank stare is some kind of insult.

But beyond that, it's rare he'll get on your ass about it.

Over time, I think he might even find you a reliable person to spew all his ranting at, if you don't complain at him or cause a fuss.

Maybe even at some point, perhaps if you've been getting picked on especially hard by Illuso, he'll ask if you have any ranting to do.

"What!? That prick has got to be getting on your nerves, doesn't that make you- WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU GIVING ME THAT FACE FOR!?"

You're gonna have to end up explaining yourself or else he won't stop asking you. When you do, he'll scoff, saying he barely did anything. At least you won't have him blabbing about it to the others, you both know it would get real annoying real quick.

If you specifically ask him to keep it secret, he'll nod, and you swear you see him smile at you.

Risotto

This man also looks pretty damn unapproachable (love him tho <3). He has the least amount of problems with how you are.

Like Prosciutto, he thinks your closed off nature is good for the job. But he never brings up that sometimes he wishes you were a little more open.

One day you return from a mission. It went smoothly. Enough. Okay, you had managed to get the deed done, but you had gotten injured in the process. In order to not endure lecturing from any of your teammates, you quickly dismissed everyone's questions about the mission and looked for things to treat your wound with, hiding it from everyone else.

In the middle of hastily wrapping up the bloody injury, you felt a hand on your shoulder, and soon after you head Risotto's voice. He warned you that you weren't treating the wound carefully enough.

He didn't scold you- a scolding wasn't going to help the sting and the crimson staining your skin. No, he asked if he could take care of the wound for you.

You felt your face heat up as he helped you, but although you were sure he noticed the look on your face, he made no mention of it. Just tended to your wound, and told you to tell him about any issues with a mission next time.

Afterwards you two agreed you would give him specifics later. You thanked him and that was that.

Walking away from you, Risotto replayed your expression in his mind....how cute.

[antiv3nom]

Bedman (Romeo)

omg havent had an excuse to talk abt bedman in a hot minute thank u anon...

favorite thing about them:

i love the tragedy of his story arc... that feels like a weird thing to say but its the first thing that came to mind! just. look. the road to hell paved with good intentions bit taken to the extreme really works here!!! the idea that he remembered the name of every person he ever killed because he was under the impression he could bring them all back, only to have the rug pulled from under him? hurts me! in the best way!!!

other than that i do enjoy his design, both romeo himself and the bed :] i wanna give my bedman cosplay another try sometime for sure, it didnt work out for various reasons but i have most of the components and would enjoy cosplaying him fr in the future

least favorite thing about them:

i think i dont really dislike anything about the way bedman is written in the source material strongly enough to point it out here? i think my main gripe is the way the fandom treats him to either extreme, like theres "bedman did nothing wrong ever" people and "bedman is horrific" people and i wish both camps would chill out and recognize hes like. a complex character? but i do think most people do this already which i can appreciate

favorite line:

im a little obsessed w his win line against may in xrd

"I do not understand humans who are motivated by love. A person is born, lives for a number of years, and interacts with up to eight billion people. What proof is there of something they can't even define?"

bc like. buddy. you dont even realize it. YOURE driven by love. all this shit wasnt just for yourself but it was for delilah too!!! fuck!!! you dont even see it as love you see it as necessary because shes that important to you!!! and dont even get me STARTED on the bed in strive and how its still running because of his last minute code additions which almost act as the last part of his will to protect delilah. GAHHHH

brOTP:

BEDMAN AND AXL INTERACTIONS. PLEASE. PLEASE. their dynamic is so interesting as characters with such fascinating ways of interacting with the world...gah. GAH. and no one fucking talks about it!!!

OTP:

sinbed. must i wlabo.

ok but i will, im not as into them as i was like a year ago but i still do really enjoy their dynamic. sin being such a beacon of hope and being so willing to see people as good contrasted with a post-xrd living bedman (bc all my sinbed stuff exists within au but im having fun out here so sue me) seeing himself as inherently evil due to his actions despite his intentions and believing no one would ever care for him? it hits for me

nOTP:

i dont know of anything off the top of my head that ive seen for him??? nothing prevalent at least.

actually on second thought i think ive seen like one instance of bedman and ram in a romantic sense, and that im not a fan of but i guess i could see the appeal, just not my thing

random headcanon:

this motherfucker would have gotten heated in some internet forums or wiki talk pages, DEDICATED to accuracy out here and he WILL fight you about it

unpopular opinion:

not entirely certain i have one? i think the "bedman while flawed is not actually a terrible person and was doing his best given his extremely fucked up circumstances" is a pretty cool take by this point for most people

i think the only thing i have is that my interpretation of bedman has always been as like a young adult rather than a kid but like i dont really have a concrete opinion on that and i totally understand people who do see him as a kid like its entirely understandable to do so

song i associate with them:

other than his character themes, its GOTTA be dramaturgy by eve, which just. it gives the vibes. read the english lyrics it will make sense i prommy

favorite image of them:

THE EEPER...

OTHER than this one its more an animation but his 6p in xrd is so silly i love it so bad...and for a more serious option his instant kill is really cool

[schizononagesimus]

alright, ive had bipolar disorder for like six years already and though medication helps prevent manic behaviors, the mania doesn't actually go away, so here are some of the ways ive hacked my mania so i dont just snort a bunch of coke at a dive bar:

1. feeling spendy? take yourself to the dollar store, thrifting, or buy off of a list of "nice to haves"! set aside physical cash in the amount you can spend so you dont overspend (or at least prevent yourself from overspending as much as possible), or try only bringing a certain amount of bags to carry the goods and limit yourself to that amount of bags.

2. have too much energy and/or feel really frustrated or irritable? GYM. GYM GYM GYM. i dont care if youre not normally a gym person, go to the gym. if you dont have access to a gym, go for a run. if you cant run or go to the gym, shadow box in your house/backyard. throw pillows around your bed, jump on it, kick your legs like youre having a tantrum. let yourself slam doors. if you have access to some under-used concrete like a shitty parking lot or a driveway, break those dishes you dont even like (just clean up the glass after).

3. feeling creative? dont go buy another new hobby, pick up one of the ones youve tabled for so long! keep a list to remind yourself of your hobbies for when youre manic- looking at it may get you excited!

4. want to completely change your life, quit your job and move to a different country? move some furniture, do some reorganizing, clean the house, or throw out some stuff you dont need anymore. for this i like to put on those cleaning/reorganization shows or organizing video compilations on in the background to get me pumped up.

5. feeling restless? go to a new place. for this i say it depends on the level of restlessness what the solution is. mild restlessness (aka "urghhh im bored") calls for a walk/drive in a new direction/one you usually dont go in (NOT A ROAD TRIP, you manic motherfucker). moderate to severe restlessness (aka "there's nothing to DO IM GONNA BITE SOMETHING") calls for going to a new place, like a museum, library, even a waterfront you haven't been to before.

6. wanna do a bunch of drugs and/or party? hang out with some friends instead. if you normally do some drugs (cigarettes weed alcohol), do them around friends who know your situation so you dont overdo it. and i say only those three drugs because dear god, everything else will just make you more manic. note: be careful with some strains of weed while manic, particularly sativa-dominant- they can cause more mania and hallucinations.

7. racing thoughts? DRAW. even if youre not an artist or cant draw worth a shit, DRAW. manic drawings are actually a whole thing in psychology and are SO COOL TO LOOK AT. I even have a tattoo of a drawing i did while manic! just let your hands move freely on the page with whatever tools you feel like using.

a lot of these tactics can be swapped out with each other depending on what helps your moods. if reorganizing when youre restless helps, then great! if when you wanna change your life you go to a new place, awesome. whatever works for you! these are just some ideas. i keep this list pinned on my phone so that when im manic i remember.

if you have any suggestions, please add them!

[powerpolyculeshowdown]

Idk if you know but Izutsumi is actually 17. It's not stated in canon but it's in the adventures guide so

oh huh i had no idea... i know falin must be 20 cause laios said hes 23 and im p sure they are 3 years apart, and laios said tallmen/humans however u wanna call them reach adulthood at 16 but idk if he meant his country or the race as a whole, so im not sure if that makes izutsumi a minor or not? also idk if it changes due to her being beastkin?

i mean ofc from our perspective she would be, but this is a fantasy setting w different ages of maturity, for example chilchuck said halflings reach adulthood at 14, due to their shorter lifespans, im just curious if for izutsumi adulthood would also be 16 like laios or if maybe eastern standards in the world of dunmeshi is different?

If it's the same, while she's not a minor that is still a three year age gap for izutsumi and falin, with izutsumi barely being an adult, add to that the fact idk how old marcille is or when she wouldve reached adulthood, i can see ur concern.

ill leave them out due to the blurred lines there, but in general i think its important to remember fantasy people dont necessarily age the same way we do, if beastkin age anywhere as fast as halflings, at 17 izutsumi would be older than a 17y/o tallman. thats all hypothetical ofc, and not really an attempt to justify the age difference, more so genuine curiosity about how ages work for her since idk if thats established? im still shocked a 29y/o halfling is old enough to have 3 adult kids for example, but then again they live an average of 50 years so it makes sense? I think the differences are really interesting! because despite only being 6 years apart, chilchuck is inherently a lot older than laios due to their racial traits and customs. Laios is a young adult and chilchuck is more like a middle aged man. Meanwhile, to Senshi and Marcille, 29 sounds like a baby, which means a 29y/o elf or dwarf would probaably be perceived by their own race as younger than even laios is to other tallmen, if that makes sense? at 30 smth senshi was treated like a kid by an older dwarf, maybe thats equivalent to their teens?

Now im just rambling though, i know that's not what the ask was about, it just had me wondering. In a context like this age can be more than a number due to racial traits and lifespans, but since izutsumi is probably closer to a human and idk if beastkin age differently or not, i'd agree that shes quite young especially compared to marcille who's probably a bit older than falin herself (well shes a lot older by literal decades but i imagine only a bit older if you consider elves probably reach adulthood a lot later which likely means marcille is a young adult herself?)

i also havent finished the manga so its difficult to form more concrete opinions on the matter but i hope i explained myself well? i do very much think a 17 year old in real life is a child, i was just rambling about this fantasy world and wondering how different things might be. if their 16 is our 18 then their 17 is our 19 and their 20 is our 22. I dont remember how mature I was at 19 but as a 22y/o i dont think id have felt comfortable dating someone 3 years younger personally? i still dont tbh

oh wow i scrolled back and realized i rambled too much im sorry about that its just my brain is full of dunmeshi!! still, let me know if i misunderstood the age mechanics of this story! Regardless, ill leave them out, thanks for letting me know!

[notknickers]

aww thank you. I'm still learning to draw scars. I defo need to make time for more studies. (we both gotta buckle down)

oh man. fanart, if done well and a lot can get me to do almost anything. seeing fanart of Ghost back in November 2022 is what got me into this fandom in the first place.

I'm a bit picky with headcanons but yh. im fully aware a lot of them are just watered down to be vessals for our kinks and affection. At the end of the day. they'er our silly made up blurbos U///U but yh theirs defo gaps in these guys's personalities that we can fill in (which is what we're doing now lol from the short bios we're given)

fanart (nsfw) and audio of these blurbos together. I'm waiting on my lounge chair right now to be presented to me.

hey man. Rivals to lovers makes sense. I'm stumped with who would make the first move though. becasue like you said, both of them aren't the most affectionate of people and don't trust too quickly; at least on the battlefield. like they could respect each other on the battlefield and stuff. but to get them vunerable to love hmmmmm. might need to bend like a pretzal for either of them to act on their feelings even in the most subtle ways… unless we have one of them a lil more unhinged in this department. claps hands* What if Konig is the more unhinged one and Ghost just doesn't know how to handle his feelings or Konig, like, does anyone really wanna make the over 6 foot tall batterying ram upset. Anything can happen in delulu land

my fanart is literally made up shit if you were dating Ghost ooc XD

love that the whole fandom are in on the joke of eldritch/ocotpuss/cathulu Konig since the chibi drawings of him look like a cute octopuss and the bio updating and saying His hood hides something more hideous. I'll check out your fic….(hehe heat cycles)

btw. sorry for the late reply. fell asleep after work (¯﹃¯) also I'm bad with writing hehe

hey, don't worry. life outside the machine takes precedence! plus, sleep is gooood, rest to your brain while increasing your chances of dreaming of your blorbos! it's a win-win, but thanks for replying.

now i must absolutely write that eldritch!könig/civilian!ghost fic! i have so many ideas that i left xeno!könig and his tentacles aside for a while, but after i've dealt with the five different colonel!könig/recruit!dommy mummy!reader and colonel!könig/tmale!base medic, perhaps i'll have some time to figure it out!

oh! don't even say it! today i was all excited about a fanart idea i had while at work, then i was confronted with the reality of actually drawing it... what an ice cold shower!!!

i'll get back to it as soon as i get over the trauma! but good luck with your studies, you're already ahead!

pretty pixel vessels!!! i am also very nitpicky. in fact, i've noticed, the more concrete an idea i develop of könig, the less open i am to changing interpretation (even though i still like reading others'!)

the only thing i am glad about entering the fandom when i did is that i initially conceinved this blog as a magnus archives fanblog. if it started as a könig simp blog, i would probably have called myself something like... königsheftyballs or something and i'm so grateful that didn't happen. im' much happier as a jaredhopworthsknickers!

and yes, smutty ghost fanart was my gateway drug.

(i don't know if i remembered linking you the fic in question that sold me over the ghostsoap ship, but it was this one.)

for the audio, it's easy. here's the link and happy listening! (very nsfw, very explicit). it's one hundred percent out of my headcanons: no, könig the forty-plus-year-old colonel is not simon 'ghost' riley who got his mask at a hot topic or halloween costume shop's little bitch.

time to pull ranks on that one!

(still, enjoyable listening and great voice acting, though!)

true, but them being affiliated with opposing factions opens up interesting scenarios: could either be captured by the other? could that mean the the captured is assigned to the capturer for intel extraction or other expedient? could it be that each finds out that the other is way less sadistic and more compassionate and simply human and matter-of-fact than they initially thought, which changes the mutual way they see each other, while still being wary, because of their curcumstantial enmity?

commonalities? they are both masked, they both have something to hide, something that hurts to this day, the need to create someone who can endure interfacing themselves with the world and its demands while their tender cores still reel and recover, but that they can put aside, when they're alone, to catch breath and regain their whole selves or, the opposite, feel incapable to abandon even when no one is around, as they have become too fragmented.

just throwing ideas around, but there is so much to dig up.

their similarities might draw them to one another: could they have finally found someone who gets it? could they afford to be a little vulnerable, to show a little bit of their soft bellies and hope not to be stabbed from side to side?

but, being enemies who work for different factions with different goals surely would stand in the way: if trusting and opening up is harrowing and dreadful, doing so with an enemy operator can be outright fatal... so much at stake, but what if this were the only chance they have at genuine human connection? a friendship? comfort in wach other's bodies? darethey hope for more? are they delusional? is the imprisonment getting to them?

re: your ooc fanart: and that's brilliant all the same! my latest fanart was nothing but an excuse to put könig in a skimpy little outfit and parade him around! if you like ooc ghost dating your insert, do more of it!!!!!!

i always laugh when someone comes along, thinking themselves smart by pointing out that "well, akshually ghost and könig would never date in canon", because you're in the wrong place, luv. go play the game, write/draw your canon-compliant stuff or only interact with fic and fanartists who are as attached to canon as you, but stop yucking in everyone's yum. it's called fandom, not candom.

i will go on a perilous mission to find all the ghost/könig artists i can and report back, sir! yes, sir!

(by which i mean, i will write you in the inbox or leave the links in the dms, so you'll find them when you have time. no hurry!)

n_n

[happy-tori-friends]

Please elaborate on your ffxiv au 👀

- 🐑 Anon

its nothing concrete but i just like ffxiv...

some spoilers for everything - including endings shadowbringers and endwalker (everyone should play shadowbringers its so good)

i imagine its like an isekai just for funsies, so dont and did have to adjust to not having their abilities. and also being turned into the ffxiv races. they basically wake up on the cart/boat (i think alphinaud and alisae will be going to limsa via the boat in this au... idk if i'll ever write it but if its something ppl wanna see i am Willing...). tho they all have the echo. technically dungeons are meant to be 4 player but for our intents and purposes we're gonna ignore that. its My AU i get to make the rules

as for jobs... splendont is a marauder/warrior, splendid is a gladiator/paladin, flippy is an arcanist - for jobs he'd be a scholar and fliq would be summoner (tho fliq would also do reaper i think)

idk what the twins would start as but theyd end up switching to rogue/ninja asap, tho lifty would go machinist in heavensward and ive toyed with viper shifty. probably archer for a starting class just for gridania rep. i started at maurader on lifty just for easier access to rogue but that doesnt really matter. rip to splendid who is all alone in ul'dah.

now races... the twins are miqo'te, specifically keepers of the moon (bc thats what i made lifty)... maybe wildwood elezen. and flippy... xaela au ra (im an au ra lover... my main's an au ra and i have a secondary character thats also an au ra who i made to pair with estinien bc i like him was the second option for shipping my main w b4 i went with my beloved g'raha. i was gonna put a picture of my main, honoka miyashiro, here but i forgor. lovingly known as honk.) i was thinking au ra for super bros but i think flippy au ra is better. still not sold on elezen tho. maybe hyur? 23rd the 2nd benchmark comes out maybe i'll make them in that? theyre gonna questioned for their names but... oh well.

ive done arr a few times but ive only played the 2.1+ patches very little (im not done with post endwalker yet either i just started 6.4 but i started levelling reaper after the last trial) so i dont remember Too much (im gonna new game plus some things + i could stream ffxiv lifty's adventures) but i do remember many key moments. i'll put a cut here bc im gonna get into story events

i pulled up to the inn to look at the unending journey. but the openings are basically the same except flippy and dont are working together + the twins are too, and the city-states all send out envoys to each other for funny 'oh hey we all had the same idea lmao' moments and they all get directed to go to investigate sastasha (not b4 the twins take up rogue, getting disappointed when they realize they're actually supposed to maintain the code) where they all meet again and everyone is like 'yay thank god you're okay' and of course after copperbell and beating up some dick, all the scions show up and say "hey you're pretty cool join our club :)'

okay i haven't thought too much about story things in main arr + what grand company they join. but. i think if i go the route of different events being focused more on different characters in place of the wol, splendid being the one to be framed for poisoning nanamo might work best bc he does start in ul'dah + being framed like that kinda fucks with him mentally - 'i should've been more diligent, i shouldn't have just picked something up and kept it, how could i have been so blind?' and being considered traitorous + seeing all that happened at the bloody banquet is. well it's... a lot, especially for him (though he probably thinks he should be used to it considering canon htf but in see what develops he did get sick when he saw mime's body. i think. may in fact be misremembering).

splendont holding the twins close to him as they want into ishgard bc its cold and they can barely see through the snow... and the twins thinking 'we've done something good for once, we were celebrated as heroes and this is what we get?'

stormblood i dont have too many thoughts on either but if i go the route of flippy (or well fliqpy really) being the one to be zenos's main rival... i think fliq and zenos would have fun banter. also he would 100% do the reckless thing with yugiri and try to kill him with very little plan.

i think when there's split paths they do split up (aka at the beginning of expansions where there's different quest chains to start with) but thats all i've really thought about so far regarding some beginnings... i do know that i want splendont and the twins to be the ones to go to amh araeng bc them witnessing tesleen would be - that is if i even end up having flippy and splendid in shadowbringers bc they might stay back to help tataru and stuff... but having did there would make it a bit more painful so i dont know. splendont is considered the shard of azem here, (dont ask how if its an isekai its just how things seem to be rolling) and the one feo ul bonds with so it all ends up working out. also the exarch barely managing to bring all 3 (or 5) over when he finally gets it right is funny.

back on the subject of them having seen tesleen transform, it genuinely freaked them the fuck out and fearing it could happen to dont, lifty and shifty probably beg splendont to let them dispell some of the lightwardens' aether especially when y'shtola mistakes him for a sin eater and after qitana ravel where y'shtola is sure it is being absorbed and tells him to inform her of any side effects. but splendont says 'Absolutely Not. i can deal with it i'm not letting Anything happen to you.'

after malikh's well when he starts having pain and getting sick they beg him again, but he again puts his foot down. they fight about it, and the twins spend the night in a different room in pendants (they cant see ardbert anyways and have just thought splendont was seeing things).

things are tense throughout kholusia, and its very clear that lifty and shifty are afraid of what will happen when they kill the final lightwarden. then their fears are proven true when innocence is killed and splendont starts to turn because he cant contain the light and the sky they worked so hard to bring night back to reverts to the eternal day.

and despite the tension, despite the pain, he looks at them and says 'i promise... i'll be fine. i didn't want this to happen to you.'

'you fucking moron, this wouldn't have happened... if we shared the light,' shifty retorts but he and lifty are too afraid to get close, especially with urianger being weird. and all this time theyve gone with this in hopes of finding a way home, and now they might lose splendont and it feels like they'll never get home.

there's a lot of emotions going on with the exarch reveal bc they also dont want him to sacrifice himself just for splendont either but theres no other choice is there and then emet-selch comes in and that little bit of hope is dashed. and though ryne delays the inevitable it is still, at that moment, inevitable. they do their best to help the scions look for a way to save him but it's very clear that they're pessimistic, heartbroken. afraid that it's true that everyone they hold dear to them is destined to be taken away. if theyd fought harder, if they could have been more convincing...

i have more thoughts about shadowbringers (mostly with the twins being afraid splendont is taking up emet's offer) but i'll skip to the end so if i do write it i dont end up spoiling everything. but after ardbert fuses with splendont, lifty and shifty join him to fight hades alongside whoever else the exarch summoned... and when all is said and done and it's revealed that splendont is no longer being corrupted by the light, after they return to the source and have reported to tataru and krile, and they take a moment to breathe... they plead with him to let them bear some of his burdens, just as they let him do. even if it's for their sake, neither of them want him to do anything like that ever again, and they make him promise. they all cry about it, even dont, because Fuck that was probably so stressful. he does tell them what happened with ardbert though.

endwalker... endwalker. ultima thule in particular. while fliq would be the one to fight zenos at the end if i go the 'everyone has a part to play', and probably the one that gets posessed in 'in from the cold' i think i want dont to be the last one standing in ultima thule and extend it a little bit, in particular so lifty and shifty can sacrifice themselves for him. and at the very end when they are alone again he tells them not to scare him like that again. lifty responds with. 'it was like that for us too. that's why we made that promise. your burden was to go forward, and we helped you bear it.'

'we came back anyways,' shifty adds, but he 100% expected to just. be dead forever. theres a lot of crying again. ffxiv makes me emotional so it makes the characters emotional.

also in elpis splendont being like 'i am a familiar of azem.' and shifty confidently goes 'yeah and we're his familiars' and lifty facepalms. 'thats absolutely not how it works, shifty.'

of course none of this is fully set in stone. flippy and splendid might not even be included at all bc a lot of my thoughts are mostly dont lifty and shifty save for zenos n fliq (if i go this route, one of the twins would be made a pugilist and start in ul'dah) bc i dont have many ideas for the twins to have wol major moments other than thinking about them being framed for poisoning nanamo instead of splendid. this also got really long... i'm gonna have to do this arent i? ffxiv au yes or no poll when.

[floorpancakes]

can you post what all the results to the quiz are & what charas they have? im just curious to see the answers to what i didn't get!

ok so ill probably add to this slowly but time for some stats and answers and stuff! obviously dont check this out if you dont wanna be spoiled (thread)

first, here's the actual amounts of each results people have been getting:

when i say i had NO IDEA we'd get so many chuunis....watching the numbers go up the first few days felt like a fever dream haha

but its comforting to know that everyone is cringe and free! i for one welcome our new gothy overlords!

i was also really surprised that gimmick idols got some of the lowest scores 😭 the space that spans is so wide so i was expecting way more people to get that result since i figured it'd catch a lot of people, but i guess you guys are rare!

---

now its time to look at the archetype list:

this was pretty tricky, especially cause i was working on the quiz for funsies at silly o clock in the morning for two nights while i was dealing with some sickness induced exhaustion lol. i wanted to include more (a few like the princely type nearly made the cut), but I found there was

1. a lot of crossover between archetypes (this even happened with some of the idols i chose for the results image!!! hanayo being average idoltwt user AND a harapeko type or minori being average idoltwt user AND fake it til you make it for example)

2. some archetypes that were only based on visuals or not on personality at all

3. kind of lowkey paradoxical (eg. someone might really fit the princely type, but often in idol shows they make it so that trait is pushed on them, but they secretly wanted to be feminine all along, which like, ok but then if someone actually fits the princely vibe I'd be slightly struggling for examples and we'd get all tied in knots unfortunately)

4. the amount of answers was already getting so long that if i added any more it'd start getting difficult to come up with more answers for some of the more concrete questions (like what you'd do post graduation etc)

...so I had to kind of draw the line somewhere. especially cause i thought like 3 of my idoltwt mutuals would take it and that's it 😭 maybe I'll make a part 2 or a more extensive quiz later who knows (guess who just remembered the 'rock is life' type idols and screamed into a pillow for only just remembering...)

---

so the idol archetype categories themselves are DEFINITELY things I've picked up on in multiple series, altho they may require a lil bit of explaining so I'll quickly summarise each one when we go thru the characters. i should probably mention that some of these (like the chuunibyou) are word for word archetypes that people use all the time, while some were just me trying to put words to the character types so the wording was just a descriptor (fake it til you make it queen), altho i hope they were useful! ive seen a few people online using these terms after taking the quiz which is super cute...🙇 let's take a look at these categories shall we?

(note: i have varying levels of familiarity w these characters, i wanted to make it reasonably varied and recognisable but some of them i kind of just knew what category they fit and that's it)

---

THE CHUUNIBYOU

to those who don't know, the chuunibyou is a pretty popular archetype beyond just idols, and tends to refer to people who are stuck in or going through their 'edgy phase'; chuu-ni being short for second year of middle school syndrome (think like, 13 or 14 year olds), but the general vibe tends to be associated with emo or goth phases, claiming to have an evil eye, being or being a servant of Satan, hiding a secret shy or self conscious side with edge, yaknow. average tween behaviour. it's not limited by age tho especially in anime media! one of the examples i used is a 26 year old grown man with a job. never too late!

Like with a lot of the other categories it was really hard to narrow down the results page characters, but from left to right:

1. Todo Yurika from Aikatsu!

Yurika takes being a lifestyle lolita to the next level, being a gothic lolita and punk idol with the chuuni character of a vicious vampire, which she desperately tries to keep up as part of her career, only letting people see her quiet nerdy self once in a blue moon. She has a secret soft spot for garlic ramen and sings some of the best songs in the entire series (which is an achievement cause aikatsus songs are god tier).

music rec (won't do this for everyone, only ones i know well, but pls feel free to fill in the blanks in the comments/reblogs!): check out Glass Doll, Onegai Venus and Eternally Flickering Flame! She has two singing voices over the series, both of which are incredible.

2. Asselin BB II (Asselin Beelzebub the Second) from The Idolm@ster SideM!

Asselin is a genius chef in his mid-twenties that ended up on the streets being kicked from countless jobs because of his ....quirks. He's a chuuni through and through, and its something a lot of the people around him didn't know how to handle, but when he gets taken in by Cafe Parade (both an idol group AND a real life dining establishment) to be their chef, he finally finds a place where he belongs. He's goofy and crazy while simultaneously being an introverted and nervous personality, and claims to be a servant of Satan, which just happens to be an adorable plushie that he carries around for comfort and finds difficult to be without, who gets painstakingly dressed up in matching outfits whenever he's included in a card! Don't be fooled by his softness though, this servant of satan has PIPES. You may recognise his voice, as he's played by well-known seiyuu Furukawa Makoto.

music rec: check out Waga Konton no Sabbath Marriage to immediately ascend, or Reversed Masquerade for a taste of the full CafePa experience.

3. Tsushima Yohane from Love Live Sunshine!!

Probably the most famous on the list so I'll keep it brief! She's been at this chuuni business since she was a little girl, so she encountered a lot of loneliness before joining Aqours, but she's got a cute and clumsy personality and has a tendency to yell about being a fallen angel. She's an absolute sweetheart, despite claiming that she's angered God himself, and is always there at the scene to deliver an edgy pose or stunning vocals.

music rec: check out Kowareyasuki and Strawberry Trapper for peak Yohane vocals, honestly Guilty Kiss in general should be mandatory listening homework

[iridawn]

Time Keeps On Slipping

wahoo new jewel box lite entry! honestly i was gonna write more of chapter 9 of SBS/edit chapter 8 of BFS but i kinda got into a funky headspace and i dunno if ive got it in me RIGHT right now. maybe a bit later.

i decided to kinda wind myself down by writing something cute and rough. it's not really anything crazy or super concrete, i just thought of the concept and wanted to put make it. so now im sharing it! its not perfect, but eh, sometimes you just wanna write something a bit imperfect. it's fun

dawn gets a lil too focused on taking notes and studying her matches, so irida comes in and helps her snap out of it, so to speak

“Dawn?”

Dawn shot up in her seat, as she didn’t realize how slouched she was. Dawn was engulfed in taking notes - she was studying some previous matches from the last Champion Summit again. It was something she felt helped a lot, honestly.

She had really given her all in these ones, but she really wanted to crack the code on what went wrong, what she could do better, the works. Analyzing her own choices, everything that happened, would give her a better idea of what to focus on in the future.

Dawn had even been studying the matches of her opponents, who they faced, the works. She was making as many detailed notes as she could. And so, she had kind of tucked herself away in the spare room that was mostly just used as a room for whenever Dawn needed to crack down and study her matches. She had her laptop set up, her rather large notebook that she kept notes like this in, the works. And she had been working away for quite some time.

Irida, now, stood in the doorway to that room, staring at her with an expression that was a mixture of concern and seriousness.

“Wha?” Dawn blinked for a second, before shaking her head and easing into a smile. “Oh, Irida. What’s up?”

“I just wanted to check in, since I had been out today, but… How long have you been at that?”

“…A ‘lil bit, I guess.” Dawn tried to think about how much time had passed, but it really had been a while. She scratched her head, but it really had been a while now. “I haven’t kept too much track of the time, admittedly. Let me see…”

She started bright and early at 8:30, knowing that this process could take a while (especially with how thorough she was), but lost track of time as she got invested into it. Taking out her phone, Dawn looked at the time. It was now…

Her eyes widened. “Uhhh…”

It was 8:30 PM. As in it had been twelve hours.

“…Guess it’s been a bit, heh.” Dawn grinned nervously as she recognized the time. “Sorry about that. You know I get invested into this…”

Irida nodded. “That I do, but… did you eat, Dawn?”

She felt nervous once more. “…I had a light snack earlier, does that count?”

Irida’s worried expression only grew. That was a no, she assumed. Dawn gave a small, defeated grumble as she rubbed the back of her head.

“…I just gotta do a bit more, really. Then I’ll stop. I just want to make sure I understand everything I did, and it’s not like I’m all that beat up about it, cause I did great. It’s just important to study, and-“

Dawn was interrupted by a very loud sigh as Irida came over, and without warning, effortlessly picked Dawn up off the chair and scooped her into a princess carry. “Hey!!!!!!!”

“…You’re surprisingly easy to pick up.” She looked surprised by the fact.

Dawn rolled her eyes. “Not all of us trained with Gaeric, y’know.”

A light giggle came out of Irida. “Well, that’s true. But still, you need to rest.”

Irida carried Dawn, who truthfully, didn’t resist much. She did feel very embarrassed at the situation, but part of it was kind of romantic, with Irida literally sweeping her off her feet and carrying her like this. That seemed to distract her enough, really.

Irida brought Dawn up to their room before putting her into the bed and under the covers.

Suddenly, every single feeling of exhaustion Dawn had seemingly been suppressing hit her all at once, now that she was actually lying down.

“Ooooohhhhhh…” Dawn sunk into the bed, her entire body practically becoming motionless. Irida gave a light laugh as she slipped into bed besides Dawn, snuggling up nice and close.

“I know you can get absorbed in that, is all. Believe me, Dawn. I’ve been there before. But it’s important to take care of yourself, too.”

Dawn smiled weakly, wrapping her arms around Irida. “Yeah, I just… tend to fixate on it, I guess. I’m always bad at following my own advice, heh.”

“I’m always happy to help you remember it, then.” Irida gave Dawn a soft kiss on the cheek. “After all, I want my shooting star to be as happy and healthy as she can be.”

Letting out a happy sigh, Dawn closed her eyes, nuzzling her head onto Irida’s shoulder. “And I’m very thankful my shining pearl is as sweet as she is. I love you, Irida…”

Irida planted a light kiss on the top of her head. “I love you too, Dawn.”

Dawn was grateful for Irida bringing herself back down to Earth, so to speak. It was very easy for her to get incredibly lost in what she was doing, and she knew it was easy for Irida to do the same. After all, she’d do something similar whenever Irida would get lost in her own worries back in Hisui, or anything like that, really. It was nice that Irida was able to do the same thing for her.

They enjoyed the soft embrace for a few seconds, before a small realization hit Dawn.

“…you think there’s any places open for food? I’d make something, but…”

Irida giggled as Dawn looked up at her. “Well, I figured we could place an order very soon. I think with how hard you’ve worked, you deserve something nice. Not like I’d know where to go, anyway…” Irida snuggled in closer. “But I’d rather cuddle for a few minutes, first. I haven’t gotten to do this all day…”

“Heh. Fair enough.”

And so, they enjoyed the warmth of one another, with Dawn feeling very grateful (and very, very tired). The two would worry about ordering something later - they just wanted to enjoy this embrace, with Dawn truly happy she fell in love with someone so amazing and supportive.

It was just nice, really. And she appreciated that.

(The two, later, ordered a simple pizza from one of Dawn's favorite places. After all, she had worked very hard today. She deserved a nice treat.)

[j2zara]

🧭♻️🤔🖍️🤡 teehee

🧭An alternative title to your/ one of your WIP(s)?

I’ll cheat b/c im scared to say with certainty what an alt title is for my WIPs when i might go back to it. That being said, if you wanna know the titles of my Docs they’re so funny bc im scared of giving myself away so they’re all titled stuff like. LJ3P, ZJP, Pre-SB, J2JP etc etc.

Anyway. Why is it all of sudden i can’t think of anything…. The problem is there are a couple i could throw out but i also am considering using them for LJ3P or LJ3 fwb wip titles

There was a version of Biggest Lie that had a lyric from Casual as it’s title but i genuinely can’t remember what it was.

Oh! I remember one. i might’ve mentioned this before but “and he’s not with you (the universe must have divined this)” from Boyfriend was in the running for Stay / Leave! Picking something for that one was tough. (IYWD and Almost were ones that once it hit i felt so Certain w/ honestly not that much waffling. IYWD was a joke title i just started to like For Real and meanwhile settling on something Biggest Lie n Stay / Leave were llke UGH.)

♻️A scrapped idea for your current WIP

There was a whole version of LJ3porter that actually DID involve devils honey but I think the idea of a substance like that fucking with Ellie’s head had like darker implications for her than it did for blue b/c he was like. kinda into it. that being said in the draft she subjected herself to it but it still felt weird b/c it was fucking with her memory and making it unreliable narrator and i wasn’t sure how to convey that without the vibe coming across that like. Porter had a hand in it or something.

Tbh the devils honey stuff is actually a better fit for the LJ3 LSOP macbeth concept so im glad there’s a place for it bc i do think Ellie having a devils honey moment IS interesting but its not right for this story

🤔What’s a story you’d love to write but haven’t even started yet?

mentioned so so so so so briefly but again i think writing some sort of reincarnation au fic would be fun. I don’t have any concrete ideas for it but i do want ellie to find her boys.

I also geuinely am. still. like so so so so so so compelled by the concept of a LJ3 LSOP macbeth fic, especially the version with the use of devil’s honey which i know is a hard sell but idc. But i think something like. intentionally kind of disorienting and maybe even J4 pov would be difficult but like so so interesting. The Eternal Sunshine angle like really got to me but ALSO there might be an excuse to write LJ3Porter toxic threesome which i think is fun

I won’t lie. the thing about anxious overthinking girlfriend Ellie x boyfriend who fucks her till she can’t think straight j3 convo especially the degredation stuff where they get kinda mean w/ each other like absolutely gripped me so like. I may do that too. Lol

🖍Post Any sentence from your wip

Ellie’s arms dangle off the bed.

“This thing is too small for the both of us…” says J3 with a shaky laugh. He knows what he wants to really say, but he’s too afraid to say it.

J4 is quiet, still on top of him. “Sorry, I didn’t—I… I don’t want things to be complicated. You know?”

He should tell her the truth. “Probably for the best.”

🤡 How many Wips are you actively working on?

Tee hee indeed. I am boo boo the fool.

oh my god. Um… LJ3Porter wip (i will not shut up abt this). LJ3 FWB fic. Are the main two.

J2JacePorter w/ creeper Jace is waiting until AFTER i finish at least one of those but its not abandoned so it counts and it is something i do wanna finish so badly. The docs for my Pre-shatterstar sb fic and the Zarajaceporter fic i haven’t touched in a hot sec but like. I wouldn’t consider them abandoned, i’ll probably return to them… And I almost forgot that I have a j2j3 prompt i need to finish that i did work on a little bit the other day but like. wasn’t happy with. And i technically have written for the Oliviaviola J2 seducing Jace for Porter fic. Like. A few sentences but i do want to finish it. Anyway it’s absolutely histerical that I am genuinely like. But what if i started a reincarnation au wip or an LJ3 macbeth fic!

So like. 2.75 that i’m actually volleying between with real sincerity, and i think 7-ish to count like. i have not given up on it and do plan on finishing it.

[sei-hoe]

manager pt. 5

hello all! as always thank you for your love on this story.  i hope you like this new chapter! leave me a comment, i love reading your thirsty thoughts! also i recently remembered that shiratorizawa is a dorm school lol, so from now on i will write it as such oopsie. also!! i got all official and made a banner for this series, im so official!

Fem Reader X Tendou Satori & Fem Reader x Ushijima Wakatoshi

CW: blowjob, angst, jealous themes, manipulative reader, language, implied sex, spit kink

WC: 2.6k

Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 5

Clingy. That was the word you would use to describe Tendou as of late.  During school he was walking with you in the hallways, during practice he was standing next to you, after practice he was walking you to your room.  It wasn’t necessarily annoying, just strange.  His change in behavior was sudden and unprompted, at least in your mind.  

You had been the Shiratorizawa volleyball club manager for about a month now and your outlook had changed drastically.  What used to feel awkward was now second nature.  You used to flinch at what now was commonplace.  Being “used” wasn’t what it used to be.  Now it was something you looked forward to at the end of practice and you had actually become...dare you say it...friends with these guys.  Friends with extreme benefits that is.

But still, Tendou was different.  You’d catch him staring at you in a way that was different from the other guys.  You’d catch him staring as Ushijima would carry you out of the gym on his back and straight to the locker room.  He’d have a look that you used to not be able to identify in his eyes, you knew now it was jealousy.  It was the same look that you’d found on Ushijima’s face about a month ago.  

From Tendou’s perspective, it seemed as though Ushijima was hogging you, whisking you away after practice day in and day out.  You would always walk out of the locker room with wet hair and another one of Ushijima’s shirts on.  It was infuriating and just wasn’t fair.  Tendou had barely been able to talk to you recently, hence his rather clingy behavior.  But you were in heaven.  You were in Ushijima’s presence daily and were able to care for him how he deserved.  However, he had made it very clear that you were not his girlfriend as he didn’t have the time for such a commitment.  Another price you were willing to pay.

  _____

Another grueling practice ended a little bit later than usual, you noted the dark sky through the windows towards the top of the gym walls.  You were working on a bit of homework when the final whistle was blown signifying the official end of practice.  You stood up and began packing up your bag as the team approached the bench for a meeting.  Tendou was the first to arrive by the bench, coming up behind you for a hug, wrapping his arms around your upper stomach and resting his chin on your head.  His chest felt hot and sweaty against your back, instantly raising your body temperature.  You giggled, knowing exactly which sweaty athlete this was.  You and Tendou had become quite close, despite spending less time with him sexually, at least, during the last month.  It seemed as though you were never really alone anymore and Tendou was always around you.  It was nice, he had become a great friend to you.  The two of you were always flirting back and forth and unlike Ushijima, it seemed as though Tendou really cared about you, both emotionally and physically.  He always made sure you came before him and that you were alright after one of your umm...managerial obligations, whereas Ushijima didn’t care if you came at all.  Long story short, you always enjoyed the time you spent with Tendou.  

A few words were said per the usual by the captain and practice was dismissed.  Tendou, still holding onto you from behind, moved his hand further down to your lower stomach, began rubbing gently, and craned his neck down to whisper in your ear, “ya wanna get outta here?”.  You could hear the smirk behind his words as his hot breath blew against your ear.

“Mhm”, you murmured eagerly, missing your time with Tendou.

“Good”, he hummed in response, “because there’s something I’d like to give ya,” He accentuated his dirty talk by moving his hand even lower, “right here.” To say you had butterflies was an understatement.  It was crazy what a couple of words could reduce you to, but here you were.  

You walked back over to the bench to pick up your bag, but was intercepted by Ushijima who had a proposition.  

“Come back with me to my room”, he offered, stepping close enough to make you crane your neck up.  You looked behind you at Tendou, he was laughing with Semi, unaware that you were about to ruin his night.  It’s not that you didn’t want to fuck Tendou, you did, very much actually.  That’s just how whipped you are for Ushijima.  

“But I already told Tendou that I’d-”, you started.

“Go make up some excuse and then wait for me outside of the locker room.” he interrupted while he started for the gym doors. Ushijima was hardly in the mood to share you tonight, or ever really.  You watched him leave while standing and staring, awkwardly contemplating what to say to Tendou.  You mustered up the courage to walk over to him, smiling and saying goodnight to Semi as you passed him on his way out.  

“Hey, umm, I just remembered that I’ve got a ton of homework that’s due tomorrow and I just think I should probably-”

“What did Ushijima just say to you?” he caught you off guard with his question, although you should have been expecting it.  

“Nothing, I just have a lot of homework.” you quickly replied.

Tendou rolled his eyes, “Come on, we’re closer than that, you don’t have to lie to me.” His hands were placed on his hips in an annoyed fashion.  

You remained silent, thinking of anything you could say to ease the tension.  

“Ok, I’ll say something then.  Are you dating Ushijima or something?”

You shook your head.

“Ok...so then last I checked you were still the team manager, would that be correct?  Meaning you’re not just Ushijima’s to play with? Cuz there are other guys on the team that are stressed out too, if that’s what we’re even calling it anymore.”

You blushed at this choice of words.  “You don’t understand, I-” you started again.

“I think I do understand actually.  And just so you know, he’s never going to give you what you want.  You think you’re the first girl to fall for him?” He scoffed.  “I mean, fuck,” he ran his taped up fingers through his sweat-soaked hair.  “It just gets old, ya know?” Tendou looked so hurt and angry.  He opened his mouth to speak but closed it promptly and turned on his heel to leave.  You reached to grab his arm before he could slip out of your grasp.

“Wait, Tendou...please.” you whispered into his sleeve, despite being the only two left in the vast gymnasium.  “I don’t want things to be like this either.  You,” you paused to collect your thoughts. “You’re my friend and I love all the time that we get to spend together.  I always have the best time with you. But I can’t help liking Ushijima.  So please don’t be mad at me,” you prayed into his arm, still gripping at his sleeve.  

He finally turned around to face you, taking a deep inhale, he looked down into your wide, pleading eyes while exhaling through his nose.  

“Fuck, don’t look at me like that.” he looked away from you.  

“Look at you, how?” You prodded, widening your eyes and moving closer to him.  

“You know exactly how.” he smirked, bringing his hands to rest at your sides, lightly rubbing his thumbs in soothing circular motions.  Beginning at the bottom of his abdomen you begin running your hands up his stomach, to his chest, shoulders, and finally around his neck.  Standing on your tippy toes you pull him down to your level.  

“Can I tell you a secret?” you breathed in his ear.  

“Please,” he replied, his hands making their way down to your ass.  

“You’re the one that I think about. It’s your hands that I imagine are touching me when I’m touching myself. You always make me feel so good, Tendou.”

“Ughh why are you doing this to me?” He whined, tipping his head back.  It was then that you noticed the prominent tent in his pants, poking you in the stomach.  

You’d never seen Tendou so flustered in the short time that you’d known him.  He was usually the one making you flustered, not the other way around.  It was a nice change of pace.   It was also refreshing to know you had a kind of power over him, the kind to make him lose his mind.  

“You sure you can’t bail on him?” He asked, hope gleaming in his red eyes.   It made you pause to think about your options, a wicked idea popped into your head.

“Come wait with me?” you began pulling his arm towards the gym doors.  He looked confused, but followed you anyway.  Maybe you needed to give Ushijima a little push, it’s only a bonus that you get to makeout with Tendou too.

_____

The concrete bricks felt cold against the backs of your legs as Tendou shoved you against the locker room corridor hallway, the entrance to the room just around the corner.   One of his hands cradled the back of your head, protecting it from the hard brick while the other pressed bruises into your waist.  His chapped lips scraped against yours in a heated kiss, tongues fighting for dominance, his eventually winning as you whined into his mouth.  He broke the kiss to stroke his own ego, his hands trailing down your sides to play with the waistband of your shorts.  

“So you really think about my hands touching you when you play with that cute little cunt?”

“Please Tendou”, you moaned in response.  

“I think you’ve had enough attention for today, fucking teasing me for the last fifteen minutes. Hell, the last couple weeks actually.  You fucking rile me up just to go fuck some other dude.  You like being a little slut? Hmm?”  

You were at a loss for words.  As much as his words were turning you on, you knew there was some truth behind them.  He was onto your antics and done with them.  

“You think I don’t know why we’re making out right by the locker rooms?  Are you trying to make Ushijima feel like he’s missing out or something?  Being all cute with me to show him how good of a girlfriend you’d be? Well fuck that shit. Get on your knees slut.”

He removed his hand from your waistband and brought them to your shoulders guiding you down to your knees. You couldn’t even rest on your calves, you had to stand up as tall as you could on your knees to be eye level with the imprint in his shorts.  

“Fuck, it doesn’t take much, does it?” He scoffed as he pulled his shorts down to reveal his hard, heavy cock.

“Aw you didn’t think we’d take it this far, didja?  Better make this quick if you don’t want your boyfriend to catch us!” Tendou tilted his head to the side, a smirk plastered on his face while he caressed the top of your head.  

You opened your mouth to lap up the precum on his tip, swirling your tongue along the soft skin on the head of his cock.  

“Nah, I don’t feel like being teased anymore today.” Tendou spoke as he readjusted his grip on your head, scooting you back until you were trapped between the painted brick wall and his body.  You didn’t have a moment to adjust before his cock was plugging up your throat, making you gag around him.  The pace started brutally, shoving in and out of your mouth.  It was all you could do to keep up, running your tongue against the engorged vein on the underside of his cock.  He never eased up until you tapped his thigh signifying you had enough.  

“Too much?” he condescended.  You looked back up at him with watery eyes, swallowing as many breaths as you could before it all started over again.  

“This would have been much nicer for both of us if you hadn’t ditched me,  I would’ve made you feel so good, baby.”  He paused to take in your appearance, you looked so pretty like this.  Your hair was a mess, eyes watery, lips so fucking swollen, drool dripping down the sides of your mouth, your chest heaving, and he had a great view down your shirt.  Is this what his captain got to see everyday?  The thought filled him with rage.  If he had known he’d come to feel this way about you, he would’ve just asked you out, not asked you to be the manager.  Ushijima wouldn’t have ever noticed you had it not been for him!  Fuck, that’s annoying.

“Ya ready for a little more?”

You smiled at him through bated breaths, nodding your head.  Things hadn’t gone exactly to plan, but you were still having a good time.  You opened your mouth, closed your eyes, and stuck out your tongue, ready for whatever he had to give you.  Tendou bent down into a squat until his mouth hovered just above yours.  You felt something warm and sticky hit your tongue, you opened your eyes only to find a thin line of spit connecting Tendou’s lips with the liquid pooling in your mouth. Did he just spit in your mouth?  Before you could say anything he was back on his feet, cock in his hand, rolling it in the spit laying on your tongue.  He inched his way back into your throat, watching your eyes water with every thrust of his hips.  

“Fuck you’re gonnna make me cum if you keep looking at me like that.” He continued thrusting, your throat convulsing around his cock.  

“You’re gonna leave here with a tummy full of cum, ok sweetie?” His breaths and thrusts were becoming stuttered, he was close.  

“You’re gonna fuck Ushijima with my cum swirling around in your stomach.”  He whimpered, talking himself into an orgasm. With his hips giving one final thrust, you felt the back of your throat flood with cum.  Tendou held his hips flush to your mouth for a few seconds, emptying himself completely into your stomach.  He hissed as he pulled your head off of his now oversensitive cock.  

“Lemme see.” he sighed.   You stuck out your tongue, displaying your empty mouth to him.  

“Mmm good girl.”  He offered you his hand to help you up off of your knees.  He tucked himself back into his pants as the locker room door creaked open.  

“That’s my queue!” Tendou pulled you in for one final kiss, moaning as the taste of his cum hit his tongue.  And with that, he shrugged his backpack onto his shoulders and took off walking down the hallway.  

_____

You walked face first into a warm chest when you rounded the corner leading to the locker room door, looking for Ushijima.  Looks like you had found him.  His hair was still damp from the shower, his body was warm and humid through his clothes.  

“Are you ready to go?” He asked.  

“Yea-” you cleared your throat.  “Yeah!” That’s better.  Your voice was horse and your throat was sore.  

Ushijima noted your appearance.  Your hair was messy and your makeup was smudged.  Your lips were bright red and your chin was glistening.  He took your hand in his to begin the quiet walk to his dorm room.  He heard footsteps in the opposite direction, only to turn around to see Tendou walking away from the two of you, a slight pep in his step and unknownst to Ushijima a smug look on his face.  

[f1nalboys]

Backstage - Bday fic for Danny

HAPPY (very late im sorry) BDAY TO @knifewh0re !! I really hope you like this and i hope your birthday went well AND i hope today is even better!!! 

Poly!Ghostface x Danny

WORD COUNT: 1978

WARNINGS: they/them pronouns afab reader (which is danny), oral (amab and afab recieving), vaginal fingering, implication of more sex, semi-public sex, closet sex, time crunch, the boys aren’t mean in this one besides like two off-hand comments from billy

Billy and Stu stood backstage before the show searching for you. Stu was bouncing on the balls of his feet, practically vibrating with excitement. “Stu, man, relax. You’re getting on my nerves.” Stu pouts and opens his mouth to say something but stops himself. He elbows Billy in the side harshly, pointing down the crowded hallway. Billy cranes his neck and breaks out into a grin.

It was you. You were surrounded by your band, decked out in your stage outfit and laughing and god you looked beautiful. Billy didn’t wait for Stu and took off down the hallway, his heart beating. You went to college with them, actually had a class with Billy, but you didn’t know them. They knew you, obviously.

Your band was getting popular in the punk scene and Stu had seen you play live a few months ago and immediately fell in love with your voice. He forced Billy to listen and, even though punk wasn’t his most loved genre, he had to admit that you were fucking amazing. And now they were here. Stu had bought backstage passes for the show and told Billy that they had to talk to you.

“Danny!” You turn around at the sound of your name with your eyebrows furrowed. Stu had caught up to Billy and had a big smile on his face, waving you over. Even though you didn’t know the two of them you went over, their smiles and the blush creeping up the neck of the brown haired boy made you curious.

“Uhm, hey. You two know me?”

“Yeah! We actually go to school with you, Billy here’s in your Intro to Film History class with you,” Stu says, nudging Billy towards you with his elbow. Billy forces a smile, his heart beating fast when you smile back. “And we happen to be huge fans of yours.”

You grin, turning around and waving off your band member, asking them to give you a few minutes. “Sorry about that. We have like half an hour before the show starts. So, you go to school with me? How come I’ve never seen you two around before? Think I would’ve noticed two cute guys.”

Stu lets out a high pitched nervous laugh, punching Billy on the shoulder hard. He was fucking star struck at this point. “Cute? You think we’re cute?” He says with a grin that only grows when you nod. They were cute! Stu was wearing a button up shirt and a denim jacket - which Billy had bought him specially for this - and Billy wore a tight black t-shirt and ripped jeans. 

“I’m Billy, that’s Stu. And you’re Danny, right?” 

“Sure am. So, any reason you two came out here to see us play?” Billy’s eyebrow raises. He could have sworn you were flirting with them. Stu seems to think the same thing because he makes a small choked noise which makes you laugh, hard. 

Stu shrugs, deciding now is the perfect time to start acting more suave. “We wanted to wish you luck before the show. With words or actions, whichever you’d prefer.” If Billy weren’t hoping you’d say yes he would have turned around and punched Stu as hard as he possibly could for being so god damn forward. 

“I mean, I could definitely go for some physical encouragement. You two think you could make it quick?”

“Wait, really?” Stu was actually pretty shocked you were agreeing. He was happy, like, REALLY happy, but he was still shocked. You nod and Billy takes a hold of your hand and drags you down the hallway. He wanted to find somewhere that the three of you wouldn’t be interrupted.

You stop him halfway down the hallway and pull him into a dark room, flipping the light on when Stu comes in behind you both. It was a supply closet, a fairly large one, and Stu locks the door behind him as Billy pulls you in for a kiss. 

“Wait, wait, no,” You say, pushing away from him. He gives you a confused look, worried he had gone too fast too soon. “Can’t kiss; can’t fuck my stage makeup up.” He snorts, deciding to kiss your neck instead. Stu’s behind you, the two men trapping you in between their bodies.

Stu replaces Billy’s lips on your neck, nipping at your pulse and grinning against your skin when you moan. Billy is on his knees, working on getting your pants off. His nails dig into the skin of your thighs as he yanks your jeans down and you hiss, goosebumps raising down your legs.

Your head rolls back against Stu’s shoulder as his hands slip up your shirt and past your bra, his fingers finding your nipples with ease. Billy groans as his finger dips past your underwear, gliding down your folds. “Fuck, Stu, man, they’re soaked.”

“Are they now? You into us or something, baby?” He coos into your ear, pinching at your nipple hard and you whimper loudly. Stu laughs, his breath hot against your skin, as Billy’s fingers begin to rub circles on your clit. You’re bucking into his fingers and you let out a particularly loud moan when he moves his hand off of you.

Your eyes pop open and Billy is right in your face, shoving his fingers, wet with your arousal, in your mouth. Stu grabs the bottom of your shirt and yanks it up, slipping it off of your body with ease. “Think you could use your mouth for something else?” Stu asks with a wicked grin. Rolling your eyes, you don’t take long to debate, sinking down onto your knees.

“Can’t do it for long, boys. Got twenty minutes before I need to be out there, so you better get to it.” Stu’s pants and underwear are long gone now and he’s fisting his cock right in front of you with an eager look in his eyes. You smile, replacing his hand with your own, and licking a long stripe up the underside of his dick.

His head rolls back and he lets out a low moan as your tongue swirls over his tip. “Fuuuck, Danny…” He goes to put his hand on the back of your head, wanting to force you to take him to the hilt, but he stops himself by grabbing ahold of Billy’s shoulder. “Their mouth, man. Shit, could make me cum already.”

Billy’s hand was on his own cock and he was focused on your face. You never took Stu in your mouth fully, never moving past wrapping your lips around the tip of him, and somehow he could tell it was the best blowjob Stu’s probably ever gotten. Save for him, of course. “Wanna feel that mouth of yours,” He says and you pop off of Stu, a glob of spit connecting you to him. “Can we fuck you?”

You hesitate before your hand wraps around his cock, pumping him slowly. “God, I wish. Like, you have no fucking idea how badly I want you two, but we have less than 15 minutes and if we do it I want it to last longer than that. How bout I help you two out and you help me?” Without waiting for an answer you repeat what you had just done to Stu.

“Holy shit,” He groans. He can’t take his eyes off of you or your hands or your lips. Everything about you was intoxicating. You swirl your tongue around his tip a few times, hollowing your lips when you take him into your mouth. “Christ, Danny, your mouth feels so fucking good. Such a good whore for us.”

You moan around him and he gasps, barely stopping himself from slamming his hips further down your throat. Stu was jerking off next to him, eyes trained on you, and he threw his head back, calling your name. “Danny, fuck, gonna cum. Where, shit! Where can I?”

Pulling off of Billy you flash the two of them a wide smile and respond simply. “On each other.”

“Huh?” Stu’s eyebrows furrowed together slightly, his hand pausing in it’s movements. You lick your lips and they watch with wide eyes as your hand reaches down and slips past your underwear. Your eyes flutter closed, soft moans leaving your lips. Music to their ears.

“I, mmh. I said cum on each other, god, and then you can taste me.” That’s all the encouragement they needed. They turned towards each other but kept their eyes on you, the sounds of your pleasure mixing with their own. Billy was chasing his high, the thought of being able to delve into your cunt sending shockwaves through his body. 

Stu is the first one to cum, both your name and Billy’s falling from his lips as he thrusts into his hand. His cum coats Billy’s thighs and hands, adding to the slick of his own cock. Billy cums soon after and Stu takes a second to get on his knees and takes his dick into his mouth, taking him to the base. What can he say, he loved Billy’s dick.

“Fuck, that was hot,” You whimper, your eyes moving in time with the bob of Stu’s head. “Hurry up and eat me out, you got ten minutes. If you do good, maybe I’ll consider making this a regular thing.” Billy’s on his knees in a second, throwing your hand off of yourself and pushing you back onto your ass. You yelp as the concrete digs into your skin but the pain is quickly washed away, taken over by the pleasure of his tongue dipping through your folds.

He’s moaning at the taste of you, his hands grabbing your thighs and spreading you wider, opening you up for him. His tongue focuses on your clit, switching between circling it to flicking it with the tip of his tongue, sucking on it every few seconds. Your hand tangles in his hair and you’re grinding down on his face when Stu’s fingers enter you.

He starts up a fast pace with two fingers, filling you so suddenly all you can do is cry out his name and roll your eyes to the back of your head. “Fuck! Please, shit, you both feel so good. Please, I’m close, please let me, please make me,” Your pleas’ urge them onwards, Stu’s fingers and Billy’s tongue speeding up. 

You cum hard, harder than you have in the past from just oral, and your body is convulsing with pleasure as they continue. They don’t stop until you practically collapse against the floor and even then Stu takes his chance to lick up your cunt, tasting you. “Mmm, you taste fucking delicious, babe.”

“You alright, Danny? We didn’t kill you, did we?” Billy asks and even with your eyes closed you know he’s smiling. You nod, take a deep breath, and stand up, your knees weak. Stu wraps his arms around your waist, kissing your neck while Billy helps you pull your pants back up, buttoning them up before kissing you on the lips. “Sorry. Couldn’t help myself.”

Stu opens the door and peeks out, looking both ways before ushering the two of you outside. Billy runs a hand down your cheek, down your neck, and he tsks at the dark marks that were forming. “Stu! Asshole, you left hickies like a 15 year old.”

“They look hot with them!” He replies, giving you another sloppy kiss on the neck, and you laugh. You shove him off of you, brushing your clothes off and looking at them with a grin. 

“So… you guys staying after the show? I’d love to show you the green room.”

Billy grins, wetting his bottom lip with his tongue, eyes dragging down your body. “For you? Hell yeah, we are. Can’t wait to see how hot you look with that makeup of yours running.”

[planet4546b]

ok i finished beyond light and wanna put some thoughts here about it while its on the mind. tldr destiny is simultaneously the stupidest game in the world and has moments that are really, really good

eramis is a hugely compelling character with a solid motivation, interesting backstory, and relates to the long running lore weve had about eliksni in absolutely FASCINATING ways. shes instantly one of my fave characters im incredibly compelled by her. they also say that she cant control the darkness because shes ‘too angry’ (?? what.)

given what we know about the darkness bc of 1. votd and 2. ikoras shredded notes, eramis being probably manipulated by the darkness (which. obviously so is the yw in this expansion) and 2. losing control of it explicitly because she couldnt move on from what happened to riis, eramis’ corruption is MUCH more compelling and complex. but in game theyre just like. oh she cant control it because shes evil. destiny. man come on

using darkness is a super fun way to tie new gameplay mechanics to plot, and make a much more concrete parallel between what the light and darkness can do (both being simplified as sources of power is fun) but they truly had some star wars level bullshit about how you control it. oh you can use it safely if its for a noble cause (eramis’ cause was noble). oh you can use it safely if youre strong enough (what???) oh you can use it safely if youre like a good enough person. its all vauge and kinda stupid.

AGAIN, in light of new lore, the idea that light and darkness can in fact be balanced and thats not a bad thing is an idea that works and is compelling (its not the same bullshit as ppl who talk about like ‘grey jedi’ like it does actually make sense). they just give the stupidest answers possible about how that works

actually i am really glad the exo stranger is here. i love her and im glad theyre in some way tying things back to d1 but it did also it still doesnt make sense. tbf none of the plot of this game ever does but whatever. if the black garden ties into shadowkeep (idk how i just know it does) shouldnt. they have put her there?? or made the vex more important here??? baffling. i am not immune to no time to explain though :(

exo stranger eris and drifter funniest group in the WORLD. i know they just grabbed the three characters that were loosely associated w darkness and gave very little info on how they teamed up or like. Why but good god if it isnt hilarious

destiny once again suffers from being an fps :/ girl you made a whole expansion that gives more information on the eliksni, shows them sympathetically in a lot of ways, and truly starts to develop them (more than they already were, which imho was a fair amount) and theyre STILL solely used as canon fodder. wheres that post about making faceless enemies and trying to give them a face lol bc i think of it all the time in this game

yes we did ALSO help save eliksni and maybe i would have felt different about this if i had been playing when this season had come out and had intereacted in any meaningful way with the eliksni in helm/in their city district but also. you know

once again i am saying that the vex are simultaneously the biggest actual existential threat in destiny and also the only enemy group that can truly actually be treated as faceless with no consequences, bc as far as we know they dont have a sense of self in the way we understand, which EVERY OTHER ENEMY GROUP (hive included!!!!) does. but what can you do.

i really like how little you see of the pyramid. also once again destiny environment design absolutely rules. braytech facilities riis-reborn and vex constructions all look so architechturally distinct, unique, interesting, and do a good job of storytelling from a visual perspective. europa is also absolutely GORGEOUS

i am for REALLLLLL worried about ghost. between darkness possessing him, the sheer amount that yw using darkness seems to legitimately terrify him, and also how he acts in wq im Concerned. last weeks strike being arms dealer and seeing how differently he acts in that era as compared to now is legit heartbreaking. also the sheer number of times is started quoting thin line out loud to myself directly after his lines about how scared he was of yw using darkness is UNREAL

i do genuinely think that this game is doing a good job of tying the specific ways that darkness is portrayed and comes up with the themes and lore about what it represents (mostly based on the shredded notes my beloved) and making that argument for what darkness is compelling. esp excited to see how thats executed in shadowkeep bc i think thats such a strong start for its introduction. like i truly can see how its connected and thats very fun

whole expansion being split between development for eliksni and exos (w bonus development for a d1 character) is so up my alley its unreal. enjoyed it overall but also good god destiny is a video game sometimes isnt it

[thisdreamplace]

So nowadays i been seeing something in Neville Goddard groups & law of assumption pages on how you should feel happy now in order for your desire to manifest I really wants to see your thoughts on this because it reminds me of when i was in law of attraction days with all the toxic positivity like i was forcing myself to be happy all the damn day surpassing my emotions it was so frustrating, I definitely don’t wanna go back to that

okay real quick can someone explain to me what toxic positivity actually is bc idgi 😳

hmmm ig moreso my question in this is why is so many of yall forcing yourself to be happy ? why not just let yourself be happy ? it doesnt have to be forceful. it can be beautiful, really.

i think that we have to learn how to redefine things. happiness included. like… what does happiness mean to you and why do you see it as unobtainable and an obstacle ?

like why do you equate emotional suppression to happiness ? dont you think a truly happy person actually feels out their emotions ? imo they do. theres nothing to be afraid of, bc their emotions dont take away from their own inner stability. i hope im making sense here.

so in other words, no. lol you dont have to be happy (all the time) to get what you want. but i also wont sit here and pretend i support the idea that its okay to be miserable as long as it means ur desire is still in the deal. like…… ur desire is more important than ur own emotional health and overall well being ? yeahhh i cant get on board with that. and i was a person who used to be so triggered by happiness too. lol so i know firsthand you can work through your fear of being happy, and allow yourself to experience it. you really can.

because true happiness doesnt grasp onto anything. idc if i just got angry and had a meltdown. that silly little moment doesnt mean im not a happy person. it doesnt mean that i dont feel love and know i carry it with me through the highs and lows. it doesnt mean im not happy all because im crying and hurt over something in a moment. i carry the light with me, where i go. i don’t look for it out there. i am the sun.

so i hope this inspires you to shift your perspective. its not about punishing yourself for your low moments, but understanding happiness stands independently of anything. also realistically speaking you would be happy with your desires so it’s not terrible advice. just stop taking it to mean all or nothing, in regards to emotions. life is free flowing, not concrete. you punish yourself for being human, not anyone else. so free yourself of that burden. ☀️💙