#but i love the idea of him having big ol paws

[shih-coulda-had-it]

my original tengu torino AU... the studio ghibli hodgepodge AU...

[spacenintendogs]

For the art requests!! Snotlout playing with Hookfang maybe <333

him sniff snoff sneff

[youronlydarlin]

warning: This is an older bf Simon drabble! so implied age gap, Simon being astronomically down bad for you, reader is spoiled, and also kinda himbo/bimbo coded, they wear lingerie at the end, tits is a gn term

Loser older bf! Simon who's so down bad for his darling.

He's never had such a cute thing like you around. So soft, so pretty. What else was he supposed to do but fall madly in love with you.

He does everything you ask. Hit 'im with the good 'ol puppy eyes and watch him fold over you.

You're literally so spoiled >:( Anything your pretty face wants, you get. There's no holding him back from buying you new gifts everyday. And you get to have the finest things money can buy. Will give you his credit card so you can go on a shopping spree. Not like you're making a dent in his wallet anyway.

Always so patient, and understanding with you. Doesn't raise his voice when you're around, cause he doesn't want you to think that he's yelling at you :( gives you his big shirts, you mentioned before how you think they're way more comfortable and all of a sudden he's proposing the idea of sharing his wardrobe with you.

Extra:

When he got back from deployment you surprised him by wearing only one of his shirts. That's what he thought, at least. Because all of a sudden you're undoing the buttons and revealing the cute new set of lingerie you bought for him. You couldn't even show it off :( cause he's already got your back against the wall. Pawing at your tits while he tugs you're frilly panties to the side.

a/n: HELPP, I know I said I might only be able to post once today BUT I COULDN'T HELP IT. THE GUILT WAS EATING AT ME 😭 this was rushed so it's kinda poorly written, sorry. Always remember to take care of yourself, my loves!

Yours, truly,

–dolly

[dixons-sunshine]

Doggie Bath | Daryl Dixon x Fem!Reader

Summary: It was bath time for your daughter. However, she refused to take a bath unless Dog bathed first, and the furry companion refused to comply with Daryl's requests. Luckily, Dog loved you and would easily comply with your wishes.

Genre: Fluff.

Era: Post Bridge (Not mentioned, but Rick doesn't go missing and the Leah plot never happened, hence Daryl being in Alexandria.)

Warnings: Swearing, suggestive themes towards the end.

Word count: 1.2k.

A/n: I don't know what this is. I had an idea pop up and I tried to get it written down, but not very well lol. However, I hope you like this!

“Dog, c'mon. Jus' this once, buddy,” Daryl practically pleaded with his furry companion, desperately trying to lead Dog towards the bathtub and into the water, but to no avail. “I'll cook ya a squirrel if ya do this fer me.”

In your arms, your three year old was happily giggling as she watched her dad struggle due to something she requested. “Go, Doggie, go!” Hazel happily babbled as she clapped her hands for added emphasis. “Pick up, Daddy. Put in water.”

You were seated on the closed lid of the toilet with Hazel in your arms as you watched in amusement as your husband struggled with the big dog. “Yeah, babe, pick him up. Put him in the water.”

Daryl shot a small glare in your direction. “The hell ya think I've been doin'?” Dog suddenly barked loudly, making Daryl flinch and your daughter burst out into laughter. Daryl looked at Hazel with a playful glare, but the smile on his lips betrayed his true emotions. “Oh, s'this funny to ya, Hazelnut? How 'bout I put ya into the bathtub first?”

Hazel gasped and hid her face in your neck. “No! Mama, Daddy mean. He promised. He breaking promise.”

You let out a small chuckle and rubbed her back affectionately. You looked at Daryl and shared a smile with him. “You can't break your promise to our daughter, Dar.” Your eyes moved down to look at Dog, who defiantly laid on the ground with no intention of setting his paws into the water. “The deal was Dog, and then Hazel. You can't go back on your word now.”

Daryl groaned in frustration. “He won't fuckin' listen. He—” Daryl suddenly stopped dead in his tracks, all colour draining from his face. His eyes flickered back to Hazel, praying for the first time in his life; he really prayed that Hazel hadn't heard his little slip up. However, Hazel appeared ignorant to his mistake, making Daryl sigh in relief. “Oh, thank god.”

You laughed and lowered Hazel from your lap and onto the floor, handing her your necklace to play with. “Stay here, baby. Mama needs to help Daddy bathe Dog. Daddy can't do it without Mama's help.”

Hazel giggled and started toying with the arrow on the necklace you gave her to play with—a gift that had been given to you by Daryl many years ago.—and nodded. “Mama gonna get it right. Daddy learn from Mama.”

Daryl smiled fondly down at his daughter and shook his head. “Ya have a lot'a faith in yer dear ol' dad, huh?” He stepped back and allowed you to approach Dog, who excitedly wagged his tail and nudged his nose into your hand. “Good luck with tha', Sunshine. If he ain't gon' listen to me, wha' makes ya think—” With little to no effort, you urged Dog into the bathtub, the puppy in a grown dog's body excitedly splashing around in the water, nearly soaking both you and Daryl . Daryl sighed and shook his head. “I thought ya were on my side, Dog. Fu—Freakin' traitor.”

You laughed and scratched Dog's chin. “Good boy.” Dog barked happily and moved around in the water, luckily making no attempts to jump out of the bathtub. You turned your head and sent your husband a cheeky smile. “What can I say? He's a total ladies' man.”

Daryl hummed, his eyes narrowed at his furry friend. “Would be alrigh' if he wasn't tryna impress my girl with his tactics.” He stepped back and leaned down, picking Hazel up and adjusting her in his arms. “Ain't tha' righ', Hazelnut? Dog's tryna steal Mama from us?” He gently started tickling her on her stomach, eliciting shrieks of laughter from his baby girl. He chuckled and pressed a soft, tender kiss to her temple. “Dun' worry. I won't let Dog steal her from us. He'll have to fight me fer her.”

You smiled at the two people you loved the most in the whole world fondly. You leaned forward to grab the dog shampoo—something Daryl found while on a run and something you were surprised actually still existed in the now messed up world you existed in—and lathered some onto your hands. “You just gonna stand there and look pretty, Dixon, or are you gonna help?”

“Hmm,” Daryl hummed as he pretended to think about your question, gently rocking Hazel in his arms as she lowered her head to rest on his shoulder. “Nah. I think ya got it. 'Sides, yer clearly tha' traitor's favourite. He'll stay still for ya.”

You playfully narrowed your eyes at him. “So you're leaving this all up to me while you, what, watch?”

Daryl took your prior spot on the closed lid of the toilet. “M'holdin' our daughter. Ain't tha' the excuse ya used earlier when I originally asked fer yer help?”

“Touché, Dixon, touché.”

Daryl chuckled again and smoothed his hand over Hazel's back. All fell silent between the two of you after that. Dog was relatively still while you washed all the grime from his coat, only moving whenever you tried to wash his paws. In a little over ten minutes, Dog was completely clean and more than eager to leave the cooling water. Before you could even attempt to towel dry him, Dog was shaking himself off, sending water flying in every direction.

Daryl shielded Hazel from the onslaught of droplets. “Dog, no!” Dog simply barked and made a run out of the door, leaving wet footprints in his wake. Your husband simply rolled his eyes and shook his head, standing up from the toilet and holding Hazel close to his chest. “Fuckin' hell. M'wetter than a drownt rat righ' now.”

You laughed and nodded, standing up and wiping the water from your body. You turned to Daryl and eyed your daughter in his arms, a look of realization dawning on you. “She's asleep, isn't she?”

Daryl nodded. “Yeah. She fell asleep almost fifteen minutes ago.”

You shook your head and allowed a small smile to spread over your face. “Well, at least Dog's clean.” You took a step forward and pressed a soft kiss to Hazel's head. “Let's just put this little Gremlin to bed. We'll bathe her first thing tomorrow morning.”

Daryl nodded and leaned forward, capturing your lips in a quick, loving kiss. He pulled back and gave you a small, fond smile. “I love ya, Peach.”

“I love you too, Dar,” you replied softly, caressing his cheek. Hazel started stirring in the archer's arms, making your breath hitch. Luckily she only adjusted her head on her dad's shoulder, making you sigh in relief. “I think that's a sign that we should get her to bed. And after that, how about we watch a movie in our room?”

“Yeah,” Daryl quickly agreed, nodding eagerly. “Let's go.”

Daryl knew exactly what you meant by that. The television that came with the small house you lived in with Daryl and your daughter was located downstairs in the living room. There wasn't a television in your shared room. However, with a little one running around and needing to speak in codes around her innocent ears, that particular code translated to something else, something much more enjoyable.

And after Hazel was put to bed, Daryl wasted no time in rushing you to your room and gently pushing you onto the bed for some much deserved “movie watching.”

[aclowntiny]

Hihi

I’ve been thinking of requesting something for a while and saw ur recent post which reminded me to. Congrats on 400! ☺️

I’d like to request a meeting pirate!Ateez reaction, or if you’re not vibing with that Ateez sharing clothes with their s/o (either s/o wearing their clothes or them wearing their s/o’s clothes, I think both are cute!)

Thanks so much for your work and no pressure at all! Your stuff always makes me happy when it comes up on my timeline 🫶🫶

Thank you so much sweetie! Yes, I’m so glad you requested ☺️ that makes me so happy to hear you don’t even know 🥹🥹🥹💕💕💕 I love this idea so without further ado…

(I’m sorry for how delayed this was! The other one will just be on a separate imagine hehe 🏴��☠️)

Ateez Sharing Clothes With Their S/O

Hongjoong

♡ Oh you know this man will lend you anything out of his closet you need to complete your look 👀 If you’re down for it, Hongjoong would enjoy being the one to dress you just to admire how amazing you look and hope you see it too! Every time he dresses you he tries to balance things he wants to see you in, your own style/tastes, and of course including at least one piece of his!

♡ Seeing you in his jacket? Heaven. You are not accepting any jackets from any other men, only his 😤 but don’t worry he’ll smile so big and give you heart eyes the whole time he drapes it over you, handing the other member’s jacket back.

♡ The more pieces he lends you, the more you appear outwardly his, and that makes his heart go crazy. He’ll get extra affectionate and protective, wrapping an arm around you and placing kisses on your cheek. “That looks better on you than on me,” he’ll tell you with a cheeky grin, sliding his arm around your waist.

♡ Slides a ring off his hand and onto yours 💗

♡ But also highkey if he likes a piece of your jewelry he may ask to borrow it!!! What, it would go perfectly with these shoes!

Seonghwa

♡ Some of Seonghwa’s clothes just become yours because he gives you his sweater when you’re cold and then lets you keep it 🥺

♡ Sweaters are his favorite because you look so cute and cozy in them! Especially if the sleeves are long on you and you do sweater paws, that’s just the cutest thing in the world to him! He’ll sometimes hold your hands through the sweater paws so you both get warm hands~

♡ Goofball steals a pair of your fuzzy socks one day because he likes them and you tease him that ew, don’t take those, now they’re ruined, but in reality the pattern just suits him more and he looks so cute in your fluffy little garments that you have to give him a kiss~

♡ You two basically trade pieces of jewelry, like he gets one of your favorite rings and you get one of his- it's yours and Seonghwa's version of swapping sim card trays!

♡ If you put on one of his shirts without him knowing, he'll come up behind you, arms snaking around you, and start teasing you. "Well, this is a nice shirt- where did you find this, hm?"

Yunho

♡ You didn’t know there was an upgrade to being given your boyfriend’s jacket but here we are: being given your boyfriend’s suit jacket.

♡ Yunho and you were attending a formal event and, well, he had a suit jacket and you didn’t, so when you got cold, he was draping you with designer formalwear of all things. You couldn’t help reaching up to feel the shoulders, smiling shyly. “You look great, maybe you should keep it.” Yunho winks, then laughs in spite of himself.

♡ You prefer his jackets, he prefers your scarves. What, they smell like you and are way softer than his big ol thick one?

♡ Sometimes you, instead of looking through a mess of clothing or just because you need a shirt, you grab one of Yunho’s button-ups and throw it on.

♡ Yunho.exe has stopped working. His hands will be on you faster than you can say Timbuktu 👀

Yeosang

♡ You got this huge fluffy wonderful robe drapey fleece cloud of a garment for bedtime when it was cold, and little did you know your boyfriend was going to fall in love with it.

♡ He asked to try it on, and the moment it covered him he pulled it tight, falling backwards onto the bed in bliss. Sure, you’d bought it for yourself, but Yeosang looked so cute, how could you say no?

♡ Compromise achieved: Yeosang wears the open-faced fleece wonder, you just lay on his chest and get wrapped up in it too 🩷

♡ You jokingly stole one of his sweaters as ‘revenge’, pulling it on to see how he reacted, if he fought you on it.

♡ Spoiler alert: he did not, only burst into a shy, loving smile and pull you into his side for a hug, telling you you’re so cute 🥺 you should’ve known with how much it takes to make him mad!

San

♡ Does that corny thing where he wraps both of you in one long scarf. You can hardly walk but it’s ok because San is so cute as he nuzzles into you from above the soft knit 💔

♡ You also wear his gloves a lot because you forget them so San throws an extra pair in his pockets just for you! His gloves are way softer than yours anyway.

♡ One day, you throw on one of his infamous muscle shirts and flex, both of you laughing but also…San’s lowkey blushing at the sight of you like that 🤭

♡ All of a sudden he’s stammering out ‘u-uh if you want that you can keep it. I mean it just looks really, really good and…’

♡ Since you liked his winter coat last season, he starts shopping for another in your favorite color and material so you can steal it. Smiles with such joy and pride as he drapes the garment over you, helping you into the sleeves, and you gush over how cozy it feels and how much you love it. Mission success.

Mingi

♡ You needed a shirt one day after swimming, so Mingi gave you an extra t-shirt. Joke was on him, though- you just wanted a Mingi shirt 😈

♡ The next time you guys hang out, you’re wearing it and his jaw drops at the way it fits your body, having not really seen it beneath the night sky and your towel the first time.

♡ Arms go right around your middle immediately, you are trapped in Mingi’s embrace don’t try to get out it’s impossible 😤 well ok it’s possible but then he’ll be sad 🥺

♡ Starts lifting it up slightly as if he thinks something different from usual is going to be under there lmao. Smiles so wide, loving, cheeky, and blissful all in one almost no matter how you react to that.

♡ You start surprising him by stealing his clothes and wearing them since you got such a good reaction the first time! Most of the time he just lets you keep them as long as he can get his hands on you~

Wooyoung

♡ Bro he steals your clothes

♡ Loves the way they smell! If you can’t see each other for any extended amount of time beyond, like, a few days or a week he wants something of yours to have with him because your scent helps him fall asleep. Also guilty of cuddling your clothes and pretending you’re there 😅

♡ He loves putting his clothes on you, especially tighter stuff from on-stage, and then telling you how hot you look in them! Buys you similar things to keep afterward even if you just wear them for him 👀

♡ Lives for corny couple outfits, so expect him to buy two of things so you can both wear it or give you something of his so that he can dress to complement! You'll probably have to stop him from straight-up just buying those corny shirts that say 'yours' and 'mine' or 'I'm his! I'm hers!' type of stuff because Wooyoung that's silly!!!

♡ You give him one of your favorite bracelets he's mentioned liking before to wear so he has a piece of you and Wooyoung just melts. Never takes that thing off unless he's showering or something. No other bracelets exist in Jung Wooyoung's eyes.

Jongho

♡ You guys are engaged in a jesting war over jacket custody

♡ He gave it to you one cold evening and you loved it so much, you joked about never wanting to give it back and he protested, laughing as you pouted, and you dug in your heels until you two were laughing like dorks over nothing. Now you two alternate wearing it a lot, but Jongho remains insistent that it’s his, you just take care of it.

♡ He steals and tries on a hat of yours one day, and as much as you laugh you think it suits him pretty well; suddenly the hat gets joint custody too.

♡ It may sound odd, but he gives you an old necklace of his he doesn't wear much anymore because he likes more traditional gifts like jewelry and then you'll have a memento of him! You're like sorry this is way less sentimental I got you a new watch lmao but don't worry, he needed one and he loves it 😊

♡ The one day you grab one of his shirts, though, something snaps in him and he can’t stop staring. You ask him what, starting to apologize for taking it, but he just shakes his head and holds up a halting hand. “No, don’t be sorry. I really like seeing you this way,” he says, eyes sweeping before meeting yours again.

[beesinspace]

I thought I'd start uploading my takes on the hazbin characters I've done so far for anyone who wants to see them. Along with why I made the choices I did!

These are gonna be real rough as most of the pics I've done so far are my first take, get these ideas on "paper", so please excuse the varying quality lolol riiipp

Anyway! Husk! I have so much to say about his design lol

I really wanted to give the main cast distinct colour palettes and ages ago I someone else take on Husk where they added green to his design in relation to casino tables, which I thought was great!

As I was doing my own take on husk I kept thinking about green for him and so looked into the colour, the more i read the more it fit! Green being associated with Greed and money but also safety and calmness! so I when with green haha

In my desgins I will be pushing for a diverse range of body types too! I love everyone who draws Husk as a big ol' kitty <3

I added the card suits back into his design, but in a subtle way. I wanted him to be more reprisented with the club as it's linked to Growth, so I put them on the ends of his ears and tried to make his tail feathers kinda look like it too (but I'm not 100% i n love with it so will probs change). I changed the direction of the hearts on his paws so that when he holds his hands out to someone Angel it shows a heart but if he holds his hands up defensively they look like a spade, which are linked to death, so could be read as a threat. He doesn't have many dimonds on him anymore as they are linked to wealth and prosperity, I think they would be more present in his Overlord look.

I made him look more scruffy too tho i did give mans a shirt as i wanted to push the "Guy who has lost it all and has kinda given up on 'life'" angle, so he's missing a few feathers, his fur is all over the place etc. . I'm also on the headcannon that Husk carries very few possessions as he never knows when or where Alastor will drag him to, so has like three shirts (if that) that he can hardly be motivated to clean most days.

welp. thats all for now! I'm gonna play with design more as and when I draw him in the future, but this is where I'm at lol

[hexational]

i still have no idea how to draw pest and its probably going to once again change the next time i draw him but UGUHHHH HERE

anyway heres me rambling about a couple design-headcannons and stuff:

as much as i love "little evil creature" poob i personally am the biggest self-projector on the planet and so draw them as the equivalent of a big ol puppy they ARENT a dog, i should clarify, but they do have dog-like aspects, i was gonna give them a little tail but i resisted

also, poob developed an overbite because i imagine they just had that party horn in their mouth their whole life

i WAS gonna make pest and poob the same height, but i ended up having to make pest taller because of how fucking LONG his TORSO is, his legs looked WAY too short in proportion to the rest of his body

pest has 6 eyes because i said so, and also 4 arms because i said so, usually i draw the lower half of hands in his pocket and the other two crossed but i wanted to actually be able to draw the logo on his jacket for once so HAHHA

and i adore pest with paws, but i think he should have claws instead he isnt furry like poob, but he has a lot of "fuzz"

anyway heres a doodle of pest with his hair down :3

[princessleechan]

Imagine spending Christmas with the Mall Santa!Chan because everything else went wrong this season.

You’ve probably gone to several stores, bought several expensive gifts, missed out on some big-ticketed items and sales having been crazy busy with work, and booked a plane ticket to have it fall through.

You felt like the Grinch stole Christmas right from underneath you. This would be the first time you would be visiting your family in a few years since you left home to pursue a career in the big city. You had finally made up enough money to get the gifts they deserved this year, rack up enough cash to get a plane ticket. And now you’re crying in the food court of the mall by the airport.

Bags, full of hopes and holiday, cheer all locked away with somber and molten lava tears. You’ve tried everything you could to get a new ticket, getting the closest one to your destination, to no avail none were available in the state of the weather right now. That you’d be alone on Christmas once again.

“Ho, Ho, Ho…”

All of the exception of a mall Santa, once on break eating a hoagie and now interrupting your self-pity party. You look up and see that shiny muzzled up fake beard attached to a smooth, youthful skin underneath. You blink back at him tear-stained face and only watch as he settles in the seat beside you. “Christmas stressing you out this year, friend?”

You knew that the real Santa wasn’t the one looking back at you, you knew he was some maybe 20 or 30 something making some extra money during the holiday season, but you couldn’t help but nod like a child missing their mom.

“Would you like to tell Santa all about it? It might make you feel better,” he suggesting that Jolly old man voice.

You don’t know what it is about this fake Santa but you allow him the gist of your situation, and he seems to nod understandingly patting you on the back with his red gloved paw. “I see.”

You didn’t know it would actually work, but somehow he did make you feel a little better, letting you explain things to him. Kind of made you think out loud and understand it wasn’t your fault that things didn’t turn out right this year, allowing you to dry up your tears.

Mall Santa pretends to ponder on an idea, strongly big ole beard. “I have a Jolly good idea!”

When was Santa British? You softly chuckle to yourself at his humorous expression.

“How you like spending the Christmas day full of cheer? Not with Santa though. Ho, Ho, Ho. He’ll be tired with all the hard labor he’s done the night before.”

You break out in a small smile. “Then how would I spend my Christmas full of cheer, Santa.”

“Why with one of my elves of course! You can spend Christmas with him! I know for one, he also can’t make it for the holidays and would love some Christmas cheer himself.”

You mused at his suggestion before accepting, pulling out your phone. “In that case, may I get his number, Santa?”

“Ho, Ho, ho. Santa thought you’d never ask.”

Part two Christmas Day

[littledragondork]

TES Cat AU: Skyrim Thieves Guild

My self indulgent TES Cat art is done, at least my favorite Skyrim Thieves guild NPCs are, Probably gonna’ post the Companions next because I was drawing the Skyrim Dark Brotherhood and for the life of me I couldn’t get Cicero to look right lol, but I’ll take suggestions :3c

(I’m so down with doing the rest of the Skyrim Thieves Guild eventually)

Anyway, my art for Skyrim Cat AU Brynjolf, Karliah and Mercer Frey under the cut, with some design notes :3

I wanted Bryn to be an orange cat, not only because I like orange cats and their low intelligence but because it just made sense. I also wanted him to be one of those massive fluffy cats, the ones that weight like 20lbs/9kg and have more fur than they know what to do with, he’d be 99% fur, go to pet him and your hand is just swallowed by the fur. I made him a mackerel tabby cuz’ I like mackerel tabbies and because they are just super common cat patterns. For a long time I wanted to give Brynjolf Sectoral Heterochromia, which is basically when one eye is 80% one color and has a little dot of another, in this case I wanted brown, but I couldn’t really get it to look right so I ultimately scrapped it.

He also has a docked tail because I liked the idea of all the known Nightingales having something fucked up with their tails.

I also did a little sketch with the thieves guild armor, I think it’ll fit like a harness with a few little pockets and bags. I imagine they’d all have dexterous enough paws where they can make stuff like furniture, buildings, tools, weapons, armor, cook food etc, makes everything a lot easier to me

I imagine all the Nords I’ll draw have ear tufts, extra fluffy paws and long fluffy fur coats, they’d probably slide on ice a lot lol, Think Maine coons, Norwegian forest cats, Siberians. I referenced Maine coons, Lynx and bobcats the most with Bryn here, but he is just a domestic cat.

So, for Karliah (same with all elves tbh) I wanted big ol’ ears, I feel like I could have made them bigger but I decided against it because I didn’t want them to be in the way too much (might change that later though). She is also mostly back cat because I felt it was simple and cute (I have a black kitty and I love her). It’s also not shown here much but she’d have pretty short fur, and a thin and small build, think 10lbs/4.5kg.

Karliah’s tail is shortened and broken (a painless break, the kind that happened as a baby) as to go with ‘all Nightingales have fucked up tails’ deal.

did a more meme-y sketch in this one, I was in a goofy mood and thought it funny how quick both Brynjolf and the Last Dragonborn were to just accept selling their souls.

I imagine all Dunmer would have black or dark grey base coats and those that are tabbies to have them be lighter than the base, so for example a black cat with white stipes or grey with red stripes. They, and all elves will be mostly based on the Oriental Long/short hair cats because of their big ol’ ears and narrow faces but I’ll take creative liberties of course.

Last in this batch is Mercer Frey, I redesigned him at least 8 times, first he was solid grey+ Tuxedo pattern, then he was a dilute grey tabby, then a spotted tabby before I settled on a colorpoint because he was said to be “high born” and coming from a wealthy family, and I was like “hey, colorpoints are fancy cat coats and I can see a rich and powerful family wanting to breed that into their line” and thus Colorpoint Mercer was decided on. I knew 100% I wanted him to be grey because of the whole “grey fox” fan thing he has going on in the game

Seems like every time I would get near him in my playthough, any playthough of Skyrim actually, he’d look at me like I just spat in his drink so I tried to capture that here. Also the Knife cat meme because I thought it fit him.

he doesn’t have a tail because he doesn’t deserve one it’s with the ‘all Nightingales have fucked up tails’ bit.

I also wanted to share my ideas for weapons (still no clue how to do bows) but swords, great swords and daggers, would be little gauntlets made of the specific type of metal that go on the paws, and they would range in size and weight depending on the weapon its based on, so great swords would be huge metal claws while daggers would just be apart of a little leather glove that wraps around the paws. Lots of good ideas cooking up in my Autistic little mind lmao /pos.

I imagine all Bretons will just look like the average street cat, standard issue cats if you will, the common domestic short/long hair, probably have the most diversity in fur patterns and the like.

So that’s what I was able to get done in about about a few hours (with frequent breaks and work in between) A lot of the time was looking at both official art, fanart and the in-game models to get a good sense on the personality (both fandom and canon) and seeing what I can convert more easily to a non-humanoid design, a lot of shape language practice because I like shapes :3

I have a Solid design down for Ulfric but I wanted to do batches with like characters, so all Thieves guild girlies with each other and so all Civil War Girlies with each other, some might be drawn in pairs as well, like Hadvar + Ralof or Vilkas + Farkas.

[the-owl-tree]

Have any #new generation au ideas?

the hashtag on my post is just to show that's the tag the stories are all posted under, they aren't the official titles (it's a bit confusing, my bad!)

definitely been considering doing a big overhaul of the cast just to help myself clean up the family tree. I'm definitely considering making Oriolechirp and Sweetswong Mousewhisker and Minnowtail kits.

which speaking for them, been absolutely lamenting the lack of arts in the clans!! where are the folk songs!! the war songs!! where's the arts and crafts with herbs that Leafpool can't use so she donates them for cats to mush into paint!!! Soooo since the Clans have loosened up after OotS (begrudgingly), i think the arts begin to flourish more :) i love the idea of Rye and Pool taking music lessons with Oriole at their parent's encouragement (Pool gets into it, Rye prefers getting her paws dirty with paints).

I like the idea that Sunflare was into singing folk songs before she got more invested in the idea of her destiny. I can totally see her as a 'Paw singing a lullaby to her poor little siblings so that whoever is on baby duty for that night can get some sleep.

for more plot related stuff, i like the idea of the conflict residing in old values vs new ones. I'm considering working the new cast into a revamp of AVoS but that would require some brainstorming....for now the biggest one i got is Poolmask and Hollystar growing apart due to her clinging onto the code and him wanting to move past as he makes new friends and learns new things.

thank you for asking about them :D i've got some plot ideas for mini stories but rn i'm still considering a big ol overhaul of everyone

[arabaka]

In honor of your almost birthday (or actual bday depending on when you answer) imagine bday sex w Serizawa vs Reigen.

Serizawa would probably aim for something a bit more vanilla and down to earth, spending time with you and pampering you. He might even take some tips from Reigen and try his hand and a nice massage to get you relaxed and ready for the main event. He dims the lights, grabs some extra blankets and pillows; just cozy vibes all around. His idea of bday sex is completely worshipping you and doing ALL of the giving; the man is going down on you for LONG time, until your legs are shaking from the intensity. He wants to make you orgasm as much as possible. He won't stop until your are pawing at him to get off you. That's when he knows it's time for the main event. He's kissing every inch of your body, whispering "i love you"s between every kiss, before he's back to your mouth. He takes you slowly, telling you over and over how amazing you feel enveloping him; how beautiful you look stuffed with his cock. He fucks you nice and slow which allows him to stave away his own orgasm to focus on making you come over and over again.

Now Reigen, he wants to pull out ALL of the stops for your bday. The days leading up to it he keeps steering conversations with you into a sexual territory, almost as if he's trying to get as much information possible as to anything you've wanted to try but have been to shy to admit to him yet. He's good at reading you and has a very good idea of what you like by now, so he's preparing to indulge any fantasy you felt was too dirty to tell him straight up. He is VERY handsy with you on your bday, wanting you all horned up for him from the get go. He keeps alluding to the evening and how he just can't wait to be alone in private with you; how much he needs to touch you. It's almost enough to make you tell him to shut up in fear of anyone overhearing just how much every word out of his mouth is dripping with sex. The bedroom has been decorated with rose petals and candles, he even changed the lightbulbs out for pink ones to really set the mood. It's cheesey but of course it works. Reigen immediately takes the lead once he's alone with you, guiding you towards the bed for a full body massage that doesn't take long to get erotic. He has your whole body heated and more than ready just from him hands working you to the brink over and over, but repeatedly denying you your orgasm. After he flips you over to face him, it's time to indulge in whatever fantasy you've been too scared to tell him about. You want to be tied up? Reigen's been reading up on Shibari and is already placing your arms above your head with rope. Daddy kink? Daddy is here to take good care of his princess, it is her birthday after all. Just plain ol rough sex? Reigen already has you on your stomach, head pressed roughly against the pillow as he's lining himself up against your hole to get ready to relentlessly pound into you.

ʚ｡ﾟ☁︎｡ɞ｡ ofkgkrgkdgsd?G?Glkjrtjsgjldglgljdgloggjjdh

l;rgjs;flkjshljhljlhjgs;fsoihj WAAAHHH SCREAMS FOR A THOUSAND YEARS THIS WAS SOOOOO GOOD I'M SO!!!! GRATEFUL!!!! THANK YOU FOR THE B-DAY GIFT.... WOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWWHWAHAHWHHAAHAHWHDFG

i loved the image of serizawa's big hands running deep strides down your back... just thinking of his hands... the coarse, thick hairs... mmrmrrmrmrmr i'm- daddy kink reigen i - fririigjgigjgif i need

ineedto write i am off all this week so i have time i have time im GOING INSANE FOR THIS!!!!!

[starry-blue-echoes]

Y E S

Jotaro is such a Sweet Floomfy Boi who looks way scarier than he actually is, but he's also one of those dogs who has no right being as big as he is. When he goes on his hind legs he can put his paws on Joseph's shoulders and as Dio's minions very quickly find out, he doesn't need his Stand to pull off some NASTY damage

and I'd imagine cuddling with Jotaro is a double edged blade. On one hand it gets really fucking cold at night and Jotaro is basically a giant heat pack, but on the also he's absolutly massive and might accidentally smoosh you and sometimes he tries to cuddle in the day when its a bajillion degrees out

and I had a funny idea for Part 4

what if Jotaro is just Vibing when Holly gets the call about Josuke and ends up overhearing basically the whole thing and makes the executive decision to go ahead and check up on the kid because He Didn't Know Holly Had More Pack He Wants To Meet The Pup. With the help of Star he manages to get a pack filled with food, water and his favorite toy (a plush dolphin he'd had since Holly had first adopted him) and sets off

it takes a couple days, but via a mix of cross country travel and using Star to hitch a ride on top of buses and cars, he manages to make his way to Morioh :D

and what if bits and pieces of the beginning are the same. He still accidentally bumps into Koichi which is both more and less terrifying for him because Jotaro is a Giant Fuck You Dog who gives him licks as an apology and growls when the upperclassmen try to extort him. Josuke thinks this giant black dog is pretty cool and strikes a conversation with Koichi thinking the kid is his owner, only for that to be proven wrong. But unfortunately for them, they don't have much time to look for answers because school is starting soon and they really need to go

And Jotaro just kinda. Politely sits outside the school gates and waits for them to be done so he can hang with them more

and RGJVFSJVDVF OH I LOVE THAT. Josuke decides he might as well have a quick nap, and Jotaro who had been trying to catch up to him the whole way back but kept getting stopped by various inconveniences sees this and decides "hmmmmm Cuddles :)", uses Star to open either the front door or Josuke's window and just. Is half laying on top of Josuke

and it was a SIGHT to see when Josuke finally woke up being met with an enormous lump of black fur and an even bigger mass of soft, glowing purple which looks like a Weird Lion Dog Thing With A Tiara

And the idea of Star being similar to Act 3 in the Cat Koichi AU is just. CHAOS. But what if for a pinch of fun, Star doesn't talk very often, and usually in as few words as possible. If communication is necessary he'll do it, but if he can get away with being silent he will

but yeah Josuke nearly has a heart attack when Star talks to him

also a BIG OL YES to bringing Holly to Morioh. There's also the pinch of fun that comes with bringing her because nobody would know the danger Morioh held since Joseph hadn't taken the photos with Hermit Purple just yet :)

also also, completely random but I have this mental image stuck in my head of Koichi being small enough to ride on Jotaro's back :>

heres a potentially fluffier au. we have cat koichi? how bout Dog Jotaro? Imagine Dio getting his shit kicked in by a dog, justice for Danny! Karma's a bitch you vampiric fuck

:0

Y E S

Jotaro is an absolutely enormous doggo who Holly adopted as a tiny pupper and they both love each other very much. Jotaro's always had his Stand and his much higher than average intelligence, and has something of a small silent war going on with Joseph because the man swears something is up with Jotaro and Jotaro in turns takes great joy in fucking with him when nobody's looking

if Holly weren't currently dying, Joseph would've been having SUCH an I Told You So moment

initially they were planning on leaving Jotaro behind, but he somehow managed to sneak onto the plane so they're kinda stuck with him, but he's very useful so they can't exactly complain

he's also very good emotional support, which is always appreciated :D

And you can bet when Iggy shows up it's on fucking SIGHT with these two. Iggy thinks Jotaro's an arrogant suck up and Jotaro wants to punt Iggy into the sun

also, screw average dog life spans, I'm saying having a Stand extends an animal's lifespan by a substantial amount so the later parts still get to happen with this silly little doggo

[getsojaded]

part ii: non-refundable || calum hood

word count: 1.2k+

warnings: swearing

a/n: part 2 whats gooooooooooddd. playlist is currently in the works, gonna try and put it up either tonight or tomorrow. hope you like this one :)

—

3rd Person POV:

The three boys had left about thirty minutes after the small conversation they had about Y/N and Calum’s trip. Everybody could feel the tension in the room – you would’ve been able to cut through it with a sword. Luke immediately took notice of the mood switch Calum had, and made the assumption that he would much rather be alone now.

“Hey, I’m getting a bit tired now, and I don’t want to leave my girls alone at the house for too long. I’ll be heading out now.” Luke states, causing a little domino effect from Ashton and Calum. “Well, it looks like the night’s over. I’ll dip soon too.” Ashton says, and the four boys bid goodbye to each other, before going their separate ways.

Calum gets into the driver’s side of his car, letting out a big sigh and leaning his head on his steering wheel. He’s fucking stressed, and he has no idea to approach this whole catastrophe.

Before he begins to drive home, he can’t help but look for their shared Spotify playlist, titled ‘already urs’ with the description as ‘songs i love for the person i love’. It had originally been only Y/N’s playlist, adding a bunch of soft, sappy songs the moment she had gotten home from her first date with Cal. He stumbled across it a few months into dating, and from then, he began adding a few songs of his own.

He feels a slight sting in his heart the moment he reads the description, then realizing that it hasn’t changed – and that she hasn't deleted it. He throws the playlist on shuffle, and makes his way home, slightly smiling at the songs that play and the multiple memories associated with them.

Calum groggily walks into his shared apartment with Duke, immediately being greeted with soft, little paws walking up to him. Duke gets on his hind legs, barking as Calum takes his little face in his hands. “Hey little man,” he sweetly gushes, picking up and setting him down on the couch. Calum takes a seat beside him, and Duke makes himself comfortable on his lap. “I’m gonna have to call your ol’ mum tonight.” Calum tells the small dog as he nuzzles his head into Calum’s thighs. He remembers the day Y/N met Duke as if it was yesterday.

–

After a long day at work, Y/N had flopped onto the couch with her eyes closed, letting out a deep sigh. She was completely unaware of the tiny, fluffy dog accompanying her on the couch, only coming to the realization that there was another presence when Duke had started walking on her body. Her eyes immediately shot open, letting out a scream when her and Duke had made eye contact. Calum rushed out of the bedroom, running down the stairs in worry.

“What happened? Are you okay?!”

“Calum who’s fucking dog is this and why is it here?!” she responds in shock, taking Duke off your body and getting up from the couch.

“Oh, I got us a dog. His name is Duke.”

“And you just didn’t bother to tell me?!” Y/N wasn’t necessarily angry with Calum, as she really loved dogs in general and thought that the one sitting next to her was absolutely adorable. She was just extremely shocked and confused as she had no idea that Calum would be doing such a thing without telling her. She places the dog on her lap, fluffing his fur up. “You’re really fuckin’ cute, Dukey. I could get used to you.” Y/N smiles at the dog as he gives her kisses all over face.

“Surprise!”

–

He unlocks his phone, and stares for a moment at the photo widget of you two on the front of his home screen – he’s never had the heart to delete it. Pressing his contacts, he scrolls down to the letter M, clicking on m’girl. He’s never had the heart to change her contact name, either.

Calum’s scared shitless. About a lot of things, really. About how the hell the two of you were going to get out of this stupid trip, about having to contact you after 5 months of trying his best to do the opposite, and now about how you picked up the phone 4 rings in. “Hi, Calum,” her light voice rings through his phone, Calum beginning to feel a sense of comfort beneath all the nerves he was feeling throughout his body.

“Y/N, hi,” he breathes out. There’s silence on the line for a few seconds or so, while Calum regains the courage to speak up once again. “I-I think you know why I’ve given you a call tonight.” She takes a small giggle before responding, and God, has he missed her voice. “Perhaps I do. I’m assuming Luke told you about me calling him a couple hours ago?”

“How’d you know?” Calum jokingly pretends to act shocked, in hopes of earning another light laugh from her, which turns out to be successful. “Okay, on the real, we have to figure out what we’re gonna do about this.” “My only possible outcome was calling Luke and asking if he could take my ticket, but that didn’t necessarily go my way. What about the other boys?” She asks in response, Calum sighing in defeat before he even responds. “Was with all of ‘em earlier when you called. Asked them afterwards, Mike’s headed to Australia in a few days and Ashton’s family is flying in next week.” “Oh.. we are so fucked.” Y/N trails off.

After an hour or so of Calum and Y/N trying to contact various people and asking if they by chance wanted to take a trip to Japan – along with trying to come up with other resolutions – it’s safe to say that they were extremely unlucky. From I’m sorry, I can’t take any days off work to I’m out of town, sorry! They had come to the conclusion that there was absolutely no way to get rid of these tickets.

“So, we can’t refund our tickets.” Calum’s low, raspy voice speaks through the phone. “And we can't seem to get rid of them.” She sighs in defeat, having absolutely no clue what to do. “What do we do now?”

Calum, still scared shitless, can feel his heart thumping out of his chest. He has no clue if these words are gonna fall out of his mouth, but you never know until you try. And with that, he breathes out, “Looks like we’re still going to Japan.”

Y/N’s eyes widen 10 times bigger than they normally are, and she is so fucking thankful that Calum can’t see her reaction to what he had just said. “Wait wait wait wait,” She responds. “Are you okay with that?”

Calum thinks about that question for a brief moment. Despite all of his doubts, nerves, and everything in between, he’s not opposed to still going on the Japan trip ; he’s not opposed to still going on the Japan trip with her. “Unless you find another way to get us out of it, we’re stuck with the tickets. I’m okay with it. Are you okay with it?” He shakily responds.

There’s a slight pause in between Y/N and Calum. She has no clue what to say, except for quoting Calum’s previous statement:

“Looks like we’re still going to Japan.”

—

taglist: @someinsanefangirl @lucyjafari @i-s-a-b-e-l-l-a-o @valesnicks @juhvette @perfctcalum @bohemianhargrove @fobodob @wldflwrbby @wiiiildflowerrr @fangirl-candy

a/n what the fuck some of these users weren’t showing up why doesn’t it don’t i’ll try and fix this shit also if ur user isn’t on here and u wna be on the tag list just lmk xoxo gossip girl

[ceilingfan5]

10 with Taakitz?

The world comes back to Taako with all the colors bleeding like a soggy cootie catcher, the notebook paper of reality wearing thin at the seams. It might have one more mystery to solve in it, and then it’s all over, the damn thing is trash. 

This is mush thoughts. Taako paws through half-formed concepts like he’s swimming in oatmeal prepared the way he hates it, all the little sticky chunks clinging to him and making him feel wrong. He really never has felt wronger. His whole body seems to be waging some kind of hideous crusade against him, and he doesn’t even know who to call about a fucking armistice of some sort. He blinks up at the ceiling and listens to the noises and smells the weird smells, but doesn’t really remember that he’s a full person until Kravitz comes back in the room. And then, of course, he lights right up. 

“Heyyyy, Kravvy.” Taako waves, but it’s the hand that’s got the hospital thing in it, and it feels weird. He frowns at it. It does nothing. He forgets this line of inquiry and looks at Kravitz again. 

“Hey, Taako,” Kravitz says softly, dropping his stuff in one ugleous chair and sitting in the other like he’s very familiar with this process by now. “How are you feeling?” He smiles a little bit, but his eyes are sad, and Taako wants to draw over them in sharpie until they look right. Kravitz never looks at him like that and it isn’t good for his delicate digestion. 

“Mmmm,” Taako muses, trying to connect the dots in an ant hill to make some kind of Pikachu, or train, or something. “I feel like I spilled gatorade in my backpack, but the backpack is my brain and the sticky homework is my body?” He gestures a wibbly-wonky gesture, with the wrong hand again. “I’m solving a mystery.”

“You mean how you got in the hospital? I mean, we could go over that again, but it kind of freaked you out last time-” Kravitz bites his lip and takes Taako’s good hand, his fingers always so cold and familiar. 

“Nah nah nah,” Taako says. “Just, I think…” Taako’s butterfly net is not collecting many ideas here. He might have a big hole in the damn thing. All the fuckers are flying right out. “I’ve never been this sick before, sorry, I just,” he laughs weirdly, and then laughs some more at how strange it sounds coming out of him. It isn’t very funny. “I’m kind of half-remembering- uh. This is stupid.”

“No, what?” Kravitz gives his hand a squeeze. Taako treasures the little gesture deeply. Shipwreck on the ocean floor deeply. 

“Did I, um,” Taako looks at the flowers and balloons and cards on his nightstand. And specifically not at the guy he’s been crushing on for an embarrassingly long, long time. “Did I confess my love for you, or anything dumb like that?”

“Four times.” Kravitz’s smile is audible. 

“F- four-” Taako’s thing beeps indignantly at his sudden pulse increase. “Four times, huh?”

“Yeah.”

“Yeah? Oh. Okay. Just, just uh, just wondering.”

“Why, did you want to go for five?”

Taako wonders if the poison should have just full-on taken him out.

“Well,” he mumbles, finally looking at Kravitz, who does seem to be rather goofy-eyed in love and not disdainful and mean. Not that Taako expected him to be. Just a good ol’ anxiety boogeyman. “Five’s a nice round number, but I wouldn’t mind hearing it from you instead.” 

“Yeah, alright,” Kravitz says. “Taako, I love you.”

Taako’s monitor beeps aggressively now, and Taako waves his hand and shushes it out loud. 

“Say it again,” he says, face burning. 

“As many times as you want. I’m going to be here until you’re ready to go home. And if you don’t mind, I’ll say it there too. I love you, Taako.”

Taako giggles in a most undignified manner. 

“Fuck, I guess attempted murder isn’t all bad.”

[sugar-petals]

german national team intro masterpost

since these utter buffoons officially qualified for the world cup (let’s do this ⚽️) it’s about time i rec you our football dudes, here are some key clowns i mean essential players to watch for 🇩🇪👋

first, have one of our hot weirdos with his puppy to bait you

if that interests you maybe nice thighs and arms will as well

that being said we’re good to go 

so who are these shapely men in black then

the german football team 2021 — coached by our nation’s tiny football dad hansi flick 

can you spot him, hint hint... he’s surrounded by a bunch of drama divos

⬇️

hansi is very important as he recently joined for a new era, not just because’s he’s walking all these attractive models around to drop our jaws but um i mean

anyway i digress, more about father hansi in a minute. 

for overview purposes have a cheesy overedited pic of everyone who is currently kicking the ball around for us, not 100% up to date (edit: some changes for 2022 apply) but you get a good idea

(”kader” translates to “our squad” basically)

but to us they are family, football is a big ole deal in germany

we all lose our marbles over the games (picture: pre-covid public viewing) and i’m about to explain you why our sexy football husbands are kicking up such a storm 

welcome to our world. send in the clowns

now you have to understand there’s no such thing as rational german composure you’ve been lied to

our chancellor & president are always the most feral people in the stadium VIP lounge and intricately color-coordinated with the team and/or flag. everyone else (except maybe italy) is just watching football. we are living it

even the introverts show up when the whistle goes, we’ve had retiring strikers do goal somersaults oh my god things can get 11,000% lit

as of now our 2021 men have the right skills the right lewks the rainbow agenda and finally the right coach to turn the party back up again after the drought 

so it’s an honor my comrades let’s get cooking

traditionally we play in black (away games) and white kits (home games) with four stars on the tiddies, and a surprisingly decent grey or blue for training — sweater paws included so everyone looks very cute and lovely

i especially love the crisp white design, look at these handsome lawn runway stars

our guys are very hard to miss they’re so notoriously dashing ugh the prettiness of them

our ginormous captain has to wear much-commented-on shades of neon since he’s the goal keeper and we want to bamboozle the eyes of our enemies with the colors of the rainbow but the same goes for him

... four stars since we won the world cup in 1954, 1974, 1990 and 2014 

(translation if you have no clue about football history: we’re quite decently competent, the team can always be reckoned with, only brazil has one more star and we famously beat them 7:1 at their own world cup)

2014 was the last wc win with our golden generation and 90% of our favorite but slightly embarrassing granddads retired since

nowadays our mischievous pretty boys are 25 on average and we’re in the advanced construction phase to prep for the world cup next year which means we are cuter, sassier, more frustrated, and the eyebrows are immaculate

in germany our dear eyebrow team is called “Deutsche Nationalmannschaft” (oof) as an official tongue twister but in english we gladly say germany nt for short and that’s the tumblr tag you find the fandom in

...where we provide you with spiritually fulfilling content like this

it’s not an astronomically large fandom but there are blogs that update super often bc so much stuff (= our captain’s antics) can be talked about, during big tournaments this horny mob suddenly explodes, germany nt twitter is also alive and memeing. it’s no surprise, our drama club regularly delivers viral pictures that look like a rennaissance painting 

lmao perfect

and ps: don’t worry about any lengthy german names etc — most of our national circus clowns have a short nickname it’s tradition, and a lot of their social media also have an international version or insta english captions, and the football fandom also posts in english

so why don’t we check them out with some short intro trash talk bits

what better way to get to know them than some gossip, we got that judge fest energy

i can’t cover all of them so we’re going with 11 crucial clowns i know a thing or two about, who i can both praise and slander with confidence, followed by honorable mentions, plus of course model scout hansi

INTRODUCING THE SQUAD

basics first, the only normal person in there: our highly anticipated team miracle manager and already former co-coach hans flick (56), stoic but touchy football father who should have gotten this job like. years ago cuz the buffoonery escalated at the last tournaments. you missed nothing, i guarantee this thread found you at the right time. hansi hands out hugs and quality head pats for all the bottoms so i truly respect him, since he signed up we did nothing but win which hasn’t happened in 84 years so bless the man. specializes in comforting babies, of course he’s a pisces, kinda incognito as 50% of our players are like 7′5+ glam towers but he looks like the suffering meme guy in younger so that’s how you know it’s hansi

lgbt stands for love goalkeepers because tall: veteran human wall and nature hiking hoe manuel neuer (35), our rainbow team leader, has both nerves and green-clad booty buns of steel, living legend in germany, everybody stans him he’s famous famous, get ready for his ‘alternative’ aka straight up reckless methods despite pushing 40, this mf is anywhere but standing in his goal, most untrustworthy maniac i know but he walks with his chest pushed out plus he ruins christiano ronaldo’s penalties so he’s allowed 💚, can throw the ball as wide as he wants and where he wants, brilliant & bonkers in equal measures, aggressive ballerino playboy, we always wanna brag that we play fair but when manu clobbers another winger with his flying stunts we revoke our statement, he’s every striker’s worst nightmare, saves our ass 98% of the time but at what cost, dangerous bombshell blonde and thoroughly insane with cringy college humor, you’ve been warned, most objectified man in german history, he rolls with it and makes us sweat even more because he’s so cocky, all of football tumblr talks about how he layers and customizes his clothing because he’s so buff, our entire nation would risk it all to protect the holy fists and arms, dude can play in every position he’s nuts, our number one since years, but his name ironically translates to “neuer = the new one” in german so we always make puns with that, causes memes and a stir everywhere

(...he’s ridiculous i hate him)

head corner kick clown in charge with the mouth catching flies: wild & tiny midfield einstein joshua kimmich (26) who wouldn’t stop yelling even if the pope god and the queen were present, when manu isn’t playing he’s the captain, kimmy boy is a high IQ twink that’s why, collects all the guys you crush on with his mustache so prepare, gives 300% bc why not, piercing eyes with small pupils, great ass great hair great legs great everything, has an extremely perfect face, this brat is hot shit, and holy moly work ethic, a breakup is peanuts compared to seeing kimmich weep for minutes about getting an injury or losing a tournament, he’s irreplaceable, “last time kimmich lost a ball? when he gave it to his son when they played in the garden”, josi believe it or not is a father of two yet he’s the one looking like a kid, reliable and out of his mind at the same time how does he do it, collapses if he doesn’t get extremely tight embraces from everybody, zesty life of the party, very expressive and whiny whirlwind to say the least, if you don’t know how to spot jo just look for the firecracker i mean look at him are his lungs ok, shakespeare has nothing on kimmich

and those pupils... ⬇️⬇️ holy mother of manuel neuer look at that

ok enough about the unhinged blondies, here comes the distinguished chill dude with the stirring pot goal celebration: our even tinier sweetheart serge gnabry (26) who goes by sergio when he feels like it, if i remember it correctly his aunt lovingly calls him that (awe), doing some great stuff on the wings, we stan quality, he’s a class act, same with his outfits, very couture very polished, very poker face brand of cutting swabian humor (swabia + bavaria = the southern counties in germany), if you cross him there’s a scathing jab reserved just for you, defends all of his best friends like no other, the master chef has some sick burns waiting in his oven, other than that he’s introverted and does his own thing, he even has decent goalkeeping skills, yeah he’s that bitch honestly, and everyone hypes him, his fellow but much taller players always lift him up a little too enthusiastically when he scores a goal and serge almost dies every time because his massive butt i mean center of gravity tips him over, here we can see on-site footage of jo kimmich saving gnabry’s dear life

now tumblr’s favorite: terrifyingly buff and resident balding BDE man leon goretzka (26) who straight people lose it over like the world’s about to end, like how many spiralling stans does he have, they want a piece of him man they’re out for his curls, meanwhile leon’s good at his job i guess, extremely politically active too, has a signature frown which makes the hets sexualize his mysterious wrath, we get it you want to be topped just get out, generates conversation so you’ll never run out of content if you stan this dude, his whole personality consists of becoming more and more beefy but his redeeming quality is being diehard friends with the previously mentioned josi kimmich, these two lunatics make the football world go round, everybody talks about this duo, they donated 1 million for covid relief so that’s nice, in their free time they serve 20cm height difference cuteness and judge everyone together like the two aquarius trainwrecks they are, sometimes sergio joins, they just beam, but they also cause a lot of crackheadery, every minute leon gets even more ripped how does he do that

(^...he can’t be serious)

our human radio on two legs: good ole chatty southern man, 2014 world cup winner, another curly head, great large curls in fact, staple court jester, bs-dispelling troll and skinny legend thomas müller (32) who you’ll probably pronounce and write as muller and that’s ok, our team dearly needs this comedian and we dread his retirement since he’s from the golden gen, directs the midfield masterfully and off the field notoriously cracks every uncle joke you can think of, lmao nobody’s safe from his imitations and puns, once kimmich grows up he’s gonna be like thomas these two are so similar, if someone says germans aren’t funny direct them to this crazed bavarian card player crack, in any case he’s a must-know and underappreciated legend, his whole personality is all rustic, he likes horses, one of the few guys not dating some influencer but married since 2009, roasts the press as a hobby and trolls arrogant players, he’s a keeper, he’s the MVP, the meme machine, mü is the best. he’d so deserve the world cup next year i really hope we can make it happen

that one scary viking guy: broad meme irl niklas süle (26) who is our token immovable object and tattoo jock regularly leaving the defense to play as an attacker and he’s pretty good at it, constantly improves, he’s from frankfurt which is where germany grows our skyscrapers so of course he’s 6′5, fans have baptized him with the honorable nickname of sülinho so the commentators regularly mess up and announce him like that in formal settings lmao, well then if you like a rough around the edges cryptid nikki is your dude, he looks very collected and intimidating which is great because nobody dares to come close to our goal, this dude weighs 100 kilograms or 220lbs, you can spot this mountain easily he’s like taller like the rock just without the eyebrows

and now! cheekbones guy who scored THE champion’s league winning goal: hobby farmer and pianist kai havertz (22) who seems like he’s brooding existential questions all day but actually thinks about donkeys and dogs, chelsea paid a 100 (!!!!!) million to get this spaghetti frame, impossibly chill in front of the goal, has a notoriously cold neck & hands let me knit a scarf and gloves, very taut angular face so he gets called everything from emo habsburg heir to lizard prince, bisexuals + modelling agencies love kai so he’s approved, one arresting gen z masterpiece, unhappy without his blonde emotional support bff julian brandt who is currently not nominated for the nt so expect grumpy havertz, topples over often and struggles currently so i worry a lot, looks p harcore and plays the english way but his personality is cutesy without a single braincell, talks like he’s high 365, does this silly grin where his cheeks are like fish gills so i call him koi havertz, squints seductively to be the most f-able guy on the field, look at this expensive bitch it’s working

👇and that’s mr. julian (25), seated, also plays in the midfield, he’s angelic i love this dude. also ‘never two beautiful best friends’ is a hoax as we can clearly see, the hoodie sex appeal is pretty banging right here

more english-inspired style, our undercover goal jesus who could need a little hand from above every now and then please: resurrected chaos striker timo werner (25) whose streak of milennial pain and slander-laden misfortune always haunts him for months until one game where suddenly he explodes with skills and luck like ketchup from the bottle, understandably desperate and emotional man who you feel everything with, great at one-on-one with opponents but usually too fast to escape offside, that’s why his undercuts look so sleek, yeah that’s how you recognize him tbh he’s timo with the good hair, they see him rolling, they hating, at chelsea he’s playing with kai as forwards so you often see them hanging out flaunting their p(r)etty priviledge, in any case let’s hope for the best, you can see the pain in his eyes gee

his name is complicated and has a dutch ancestry flair to it: our second goalkeeper and guardian angel marc-andré ter stegen (29), we all call him just ter stegen and basically never marc-andré like ter is his first name it’s tradtion, anyway he’s top notch, usually has nothing to do in the national team since our manuel’s aggressive ballerino booty can fly in all directions and catches balls from space but marc is a given and a goalie god at fc barcelona, so stop hating on him he’s great, germany is the nation of goalkeepers with good reason and he is no exception. pretty normal and likable bloke so less clown mode to be expected — usually, nobody’s truly in their right mind in this ass parade, i think marc’s insanity manifests in the fact that he does his saves like superman so this guy is a bit ridiculous as well, in any case he’s an absolute luxury to have as our backup, i love ter stegen, he’s superb, did i mention that i love ter stegen? 

dc has flash but we have: lightning fast wing tech deity leroy sané (25) who already has several kids at home and all the clubs fight for him, oh boy he’s truly in demand, can’t be blamed he’s our most beautiful player: looks-wise, playing-wise, recently bounced back from a nasty mental block with the help of hansi, does extraterrestrial things with his pretty feet, v pleasant to listen to his voice is so deep, signature laugh, always somewhere giggling and snuggling w/ manu and especially his bestie sergio, cutest bunch, sané sounds like whipped cream (”sahne”) in german so we say he’s “allererste sahne” meaning creme de la creme so that sums him up, leroy is trained by pep guardiola in england, bag of tricks kinda guy, very tongue in cheek/teasing but he’s also a slutty capricorn, truly a combination of opposites, a talent and sight to behold, he gets several pictures because he’s leroy and my crush

and last but not least, basically a child: nobody calls him jamal musiala (18) anymore because bambi is the best ever nickname for him, german football lore has it that it was leroy who invented it out of nowhere, the rest is history, bambi has the looks and playing style of a deer plus some remarkable talent but prepare to suffer if you stan him the child protection agenda has him sitting on the bench often as of yet, nevertheless he is our future and he’s really popular, we all baby him, his skills and sudden goals are truly shocking he’s born 2003 like what do we do with this toddler?! in any case everyone adores bambi and he is in — as we saw — crazy, but good hands so fingers crossed, you spot him by the way he pulls his brows up and looks v small despite being 6′0, don’t underestimate him he’s always ready to go off on that goal

- honorable mentions, including some golden gen players:

antonio rüdiger (28) - also from the chelsea squad, very tall, defends, used to play with a mask due to injury, toni nibbles at our opponents’ backs to catch them off guard i’m not joking

mats hummels (32) - tumblr famous to unhealthy degrees, it needs to stop, currently on break, caught between our golden gen and eyebrow twink era, gets called D**F a lot but we don’t use that weird word here, defends, king of own goals, nice black hair though

toni kroos (31) - retired this year which i’m sad about, skillful real madrid midfielder who looks a little exhausted, infamously no-nonsense in interviews, badass with his tats, 2014 world cup winner, i miss toni </3

robin gosens (27) - new on the scene, from zero to hero, made a good impression at the last euros, very honest soul, now injured, he looks like the younger brother of the guy next on this list

lukas podolski (36) - poldi, was a sunshine himbo before it was cool, legendary retired winger, luke is cute and funny and confused he’s a national treasure, proof that geminis can be adorable, golden retriever

bastian schweinsteiger (37) - retired captain and silverback, basti is now pundit, made a huge impact back in the day, best friends ever with poldi they made legendary meme adverts for crisps together

miroslav klose (43) - the somersault guy, man he was the best striker ever, also retired a while ago i miss him tremendously, very stern but humble and a good man, miro is also a world cup winner, paved the way

philipp lahm (37) - another retired captain from the golden generation, several defensive positions, infamously smol and very talented, bffs with big manu, brainiac short king, we owe him everything

BONUS: robert lewandowsi (33) - he’s not german, he’s not in our team, he can’t join us since he already plays elsewhere (for poland nt), but our whole nation acts like he can because we want him as our striker lmao! get off tiktok lewy we need you 

(the four stars are from the munich club jersey which is unrelated to the national team, we like him since he plays there and is extremely successful, a lot of our national players are sent from munich it’s the talent factory, check them out for further germany nt research if u want, the club is legendary)

and that’s it thank you for sticking with me here i hope you adopted some new ridiculous boyfriends and gained sexy insights about germany

as you saw we have pretty boys ranging from XXL to XXS so the buffet is open we have something for everybody

collect yours and tune in for more november world cup quali games 2021 and the tournament next summer where we will spread more rainbow buffoonery than ever and smize the competition to the ground

totally official predictions:

during semi finals, serge gnabry will evaporate christiano ronaldo in his cooking pan, then bounce the ball into the goal with his big booty: instant man of the match

hansi flick will chant a magic spell and timo werner scores 15 times

thomas müller’s horses will eat france, italy, and whatever other team is good

kimmich distracts messi by hitting the high c

manuel will end england in a penalty shootout wearing a torn neon pink camoflage jersey

when we play against poland, lewy will cause an own goal so he can finally be our striker in spirit 😔✊

leroy sané will look very hot

leon goretzka debuts a tenpack

kai havertz will credit his dogs and donkeys for his success after scoring the overly dramatic winning goal in the final with those long noodly legs <3

it will either be clownishly tragic or eyebrowly glorious but in any case it’s good fun and you get to see some pretty people running from left to right and vice versa ⭐️ (and memes are pretty much guaranteed no matter what happens)

for those who are already in the fandom and want to add their own husbands or some more sexy stats to this or if something needs correction go right ahead let’s go and thank you for reading + reblogging

[mrs-gucci]

Kitten-Sitting [blurb] {werewolf!Flip Zimmerman x Reader}

anonymous

Oh I would love to read Flip or Maurizio as a werewolf. Smut/fluff or horror

as much as I would’ve loved to have written something for werewolf Maurizio, I had this hilarious idea and I just had to write it up for Flip.

warnings. FLUFF, HUMOR, general cuteness, kitten-sitting, Flip being a grump lol, but he’s also a big ol’ softie.

(possible) tw’s. Flip in werewolf form.

word count: 952

When you walk into the cabin and see the large, hairy form of your boyfriend lounging on his recliner, your stomach drops. Shit, you totally forgot it was a full moon tonight.

The kittens mewl from the carrier and Flip immediately turns his head, ears pricked and snout lifted. He huffs, standing up and walking around the couch with his arms crossed.

You give him an awkward smile. “Heeeeey baby. How was your day?”

“What in the world are you doing with those kittens?” He asks, voice low and husky. “Especially with it being the full moon tonight. C’mon, you know better.”

Your cheeks burn with a bit of shame. You forgot to check the calendar when you’d promised your friend to take the kittens tonight.

“I completely forgot that tonight was the full moon, honey, and I agreed to take them until ten. I’m really, really sorry; I’ll keep them up in the guest room.”

Flip sighs, shaking his head. “Just...as long as you keep ‘em away from me, they can stay down here.”

“Are you sure?”

He nods. “As long as they don’t come crawling all over me.”

“Thank you, baby.” You smile, reaching up to give him a kiss on the cheek before he makes his way back over to the recliner.

After unpacking all the kitten stuff and making sure that anything potentially hazardous is put away, you let the four kittens out of their carrier and they all start skittering around the first floor. 

Your lips pull up into a small smile as you watch them run around and play with some of their toys. You’re so focused on the ones playing that you don’t notice the one that sneaks off into the living room, curious about the large hairy man seated in the recliner.

His eyes widen when he feels a little furry critter rub up against his paw that hangs down off the edge of the recliner arm and he pulls away quickly.

“Damnit...peanut!”

You look up and see the kitten, standing up immediately. “Whoops, sorry. I’m coming, I’m coming.”

Soon enough, though, the same little black kitten wanders off towards Flip’s recliner. He made the mistake of resting his eyes for a bit, allowing the little kitten to climb up the chair and snuggle up in the crook of his elbow.

He feels a little wiggling on his arm but he doesn’t think much of it, so when he opens his eyes and looks down, he just groans at the sight of the kitten.

“Goddamnit.”

“What is it, honey?” You ask from the kitchen.

The kitten is snoozing peacefully, nestled comfortable into his fur and the more he looks at it, the more he feels himself softening. He huffs. 

“Nothing, nothing.”

It doesn’t take long before you notice that one of the kittens is missing and at first, you’re worried, looking all over the kitchen and dining room. But then, a small smirk grazes your lips when you realize that the only other place it could’ve wandered off to is the living room.

Hmm...could it be?

“Hey, Flip?”

“Mm?”

“Have you seen the black kitten? He’s not here with the rest and I checked all the other rooms, but I can’t find him.”

He clears his throat awkwardly, shifting in his seat. “Yeah...he’s, uh, he’s here.”

“Oh, okay. Thank you.” You smile to yourself, giggling quietly. “...But I thought you said--”

“I know what I said.” Flip growls, rolling his eyes. You giggle a bit louder at his defensiveness. “Just...whatever. He climbed up here and fell asleep and I didn’t wanna move him, alright? And I guess he’s...kittens don’t bother me as much as cats do when I’m a wolf.”

“Mmhmm.”

As the evening draws on, the kittens slowly follow after their sibling and climb up onto the recliner. And when you come back downstairs from your shower, you have to cover your mouth to keep from laughing too loudly at the sight that greets you.

Flip has all four kittens with him, each climbing all over him like a jungle gym. He’s got a kitten on his shoulder, one making its way across his chest, one resting in his paw and finally, one laying right on the top of his head.

He looks over at you with a grumpy little frown.

“I’m starting to enjoy these kittens a little less.”

You laugh softly. “No you haven’t, you’re just being a grump.”

“Whatever. You can’t prove anything.” He says with a huff, trying to hide his small smile. 

The kitten on his head begins to slip down, paws forcing his eyes closed. He reaches up to lift the kitten off his head, chuckling softly when its tiny claws pull his eyelids up. “Alright kid, time to go. C’mon now, let go of me.”

You giggle as you watch, eventually having to step in when he starts getting a bit frustrated and starts pulling a bit too hard for your comfort. You place the kitten right back down in his paw, kissing the top of his head before walking back into the kitchen for a snack.

If you aren’t mistaken, when quarter to ten rolls around and you have to pack the kittens up for their departure, Flip almost looks a bit sad to see them go. When you’re ready, he brings them over to their carrier and coaxes them off his arms and back inside.

Once they leave, he comes back downstairs and you pull him in for a hug and a kiss.

“Thank you for being so great with the kittens.”

He chuckles. “Just promise me we won’t be getting one anytime soon, okay?”

“Alright, I promise.”

🐺werewolf wednesday 10/20 🌙

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