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#but i just. kinda struggled to see what you were getting at?
nevermorgue · 3 days
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ms hayley ! !! do you have hc's for how eulalie would interact with the misfit's cast? I feel like she'd get along with them all save for Montresor and will but I need eulalie content 🙏🏻
omg hiii. I think you meant to say annabel’s team because you brought up monty but I GOT YOU. I got you.
With Annabel
- Annabel finds her very odd. She is a bit bothered by how unpredictable Eulalie can be with her blunt words and tendency to not properly understand all social cues. Annabel Lee is a woman used to talking to people that are playing the game she is, so this is not something she is used to. - Eulalie is very perceptive, much to Annabel Lee's dismay. She notices when Annabel is mildly irritated by the way her eyebrows shift on her face. - Eulalie asks Annabel to give her doll curls like her. She does not (and cannot). - Annabel is horrified to see Eulalie putting two different tea bags into one cup. She wants to see what the flavors taste like together. - Eulalie isn't terrible at chess. Not on Annabel's level, but she doesn't mind playing against her. - Eulalie asks her one day why she's mean. Annabel simply responds with "Think me mean if you wish, I am simply surviving." Then Eulalie says something like "What is the point in surviving if you're all alone by the end?" She bites her tongue. She cannot tell Eulalie that she will never be alone as long as she has Lenore.
With Ada
- Honestly I think this could go both ways.
- Ada calls her creepy and finds her weird, but she doesn’t really dislike her company.
- Eulalie thinks she’s pretty! She likes touching Ada’s hair bow.
- Asks to borrow said hair bow. Ada only agrees because someone wanting to look like her NEVER happens.
- Ada is jealous of her singing voice.
- Eulalie mentions something about the length of the small intestine and Ada feels sick She just remembers an ax to the stomach.
- Eulalie tells her that she’s pretty a lot and Ada gets kinda mad bc she assumes Eulalie is lying to her because of her tone/the way she speaks.
- “Why would you think you’re not pretty?”
“Empty flattery will not get you anywhere with me!”
“It’s not empty. It’s quite full, really. You are pretty.”
- And she just struggles to believe it internally because compared to Annabel she doesn’t really feel pretty. But of course she just haughtily laughs and goes like “I know! Finally, you took notice!”
With Prospero - An unlikely duo. Eulalie is interested in his medical knowledge. He is mildly concerned about how much she knows about the human body despite having no medical career. - Eulalie's humming kinda reminds him of his mother. He'd rather die than say that. - She claims that he is mean too, but not as mean as Annabel. He takes mild offense. - She tries to curl a piece of her hair around her finger and put it in front of her face to copy his hairstyle. - Reading buddies. She'll blurt out a random fun fact about bones or something and he'll nod and add one of his own. Freaks. - Eulalie insists that when he's with her, all the "survival games" are set aside. She can tell it stresses him out. His hands tense up when he holds objects, and it's obvious even with the gloves. He's a jaw clencher too. With Montresor - As good as you'd expect it to be, really. - He calls her 'little miss' because she's anything but little. She literally would not care if it were anyone else but him. - He yanks at her sleeves because they're long and easy to grab. - "Why is everyone with great hair so mean?" "Aw, that's real kind of ya to say, little miss." "You’re horrible.”
- He tries to like intimidate her with close contact but she’s almost his height. Plus, she just doesn’t respond to that sort of thing.
- I think they’d be really interesting actually. He’s been compared to the devil, is considered demonic…and she has an interest in the occult. Imagine that.
With Will
- Honestly, not as bad as you might first think.
- She sort of pities him, but not really. He knows the choices he makes are bad.
- She’s happy to share things with him if he stares for a while. He’ll never dare ask for something, just kinda stare like a puppy until it’s offered. She won’t be cruel for no reason.
- She actually likes hearing about his writing journals.
- Will starts to instinctively study her face and body to learn how to become her even though he has no reason to. She can tell by the way he mumbles her words after she speaks sometimes.
- They’ll be sitting in silence and she’ll suddenly ask him what his loneliness feels like. Like uncomfortable questions that he can’t/doesn’t want to answer. But his reaction is enough of an answer.
- Allows him to turn into her so she can braid his hair.
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itendtothinkalot · 2 days
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confession 3.0
Summary: reader has suppressed her feelings for huening for so long, believing that she could manage without confessing. sooo how will she react when she discovers that kai had gone on a blind date.......
Genre: fluffy
Characters: huening kaix f!reader
Words: 6202
a/n: suUuUuper busy at work rn but i managed to write something rly quick today! i didnt rly proofread or edit this so i'm sorry if thrs errors! also stream #ggum!!!
Completed (oneshot)
Kai, It’s hard to find the right words when I’m about to say something that could change everything between us. But here I am, thinking maybe, just MAYBE, you would feel the same way. (Though, I’m on my period, so maybe I’m reading too much into it.) We’ve been best friends for as long as I can remember. You’ve always been my rock, through every high and low. Maybe that’s why it’s taken me so long to see you as more than a friend. But now, I think I’m ready to face the truth. I like you—probably more than a friend should.
It’s been two years since you wrote that letter. You and Kai had just graduated. Maybe it was the adrenaline from graduation, but you wrote it the night he kissed your cheek after you were named valedictorian.
“THAT’S MY BEST FRIEND!” you heard him yell from the seats. You rolled your eyes as you walked up to get your diploma, but you couldn’t ignore the look in his eyes as he mouthed the words, “I’m so proud of you.”
“The letter’s collecting dust,” Beomgyu teased, lying on your bed, reading the letter you wrote for Kai all those years ago.
“You come to my house, rummage through my memory box, and take out this hellish letter?” You glared at Beomgyu, who knew you were getting irritated. “What are you trying to achieve? If you want me to cry, just call me dumb. I’m on my period anyway.”
“TMI, but I’ll let it slide since I am a huge female supporter.” He chuckled, “But here’s a thought! Give him the letter.”
You snatched the letter from him. “And why would I do that?"
"Why not? It's cute!"
"Cute?"
"Yeah!"
"In what way?" You asked.
"It has like words. And stuff." Beomgyu paused. “Besides, you two belong together! Plus, I need some drama in my life. Ever since Soobin and Yeonjun went to study overseas, things have been so boring.”
"Are you insinuating that Kai, Taehyun, and I are boring?" you asked, deadpan.
"I'm not insinuating. I'm literally telling you that," Beomgyu chuckled, draping his arms over your shoulders like he hadn’t just insulted you.
"You’re an idiot," you scoffed, shaking your head. "Besides, I’m perfectly fine with how things are."
"Oh, you mean staring at him lovingly while he’s eating?" Beomgyu teased, widening his eyes and pouting dramatically, doing his best imitation of you watching Kai.
“I could kill you.”
“But you won’t.”
You stuck your tongue out at him, knowing he was right. It was cruel—the way you felt about Kai. Almost comically so. Falling in love with your best friend felt like a cosmic joke.
“Do you think he likes me back?” You sighed.
“How would I know?” Beomgyu rolled his eyes.
“Well, for starters, you three have guy’s nights.”
“We talk about games. Football. You know, guy stuff. Do we look like the kind of people who talk about feelings?”
“Kinda. Yeah.” 
The living room was filled with high pitched screaming (mostly from Beomgyu) as the four of you—Beomgyu, Taehyun, Kai, and you—were completely absorbed in a random game Kai had discovered in a video he had seen somewhere.
Taehyun, with a mischievous grin, leaned back on the couch. “Hey, did you guys hear the news?” 
“What news?” Beomgyu asked, his eyes still locked onto the TV.
“Kai has a girlfriend~” Taehyun sang, before getting elbowed in his stomach.
“Dude!” Kai said, his eyes shifted to you and then to Beomgyu. “It was just a blind date my sister set me up on. It was stupid.” 
Your fingers froze. You glanced over at Taehyun, still grinning as he played, and felt a sudden surge of jealousy. Your hands fumbled with the controller, struggling to keep your composure as your heart raced. You shot a quick look at Kai, whose focus wavered as his eyes were still locked onto your every movement as if waiting for a reaction.
"Why would you bring that up when we’re about to beat the last level?” Kai sighed, his brows furrowing in mild annoyance as his hands tightened around the controller.
Taehyun smirked, leaning back lazily against the couch. “Would you have preferred I brought it up on the first level?” he teased, eyes gleaming with mischief.
Kai rolled his eyes, exhaling in frustration. “It wasn’t a big deal,” he muttered, his voice casual, but there was a slight tension in his posture as if he wanted to brush the subject away quickly.
“So it did happen?” Beomgyu exclaimed, freezing his character mid-air on the screen.
“A couple of days ago,” Taehyun said casually, his attention still on the game. “I was surprised too. He didn’t mention anything about it, I only happened to walk past his little date at the cafe I frequent.”
Kai shrugged, trying to appear nonchalant. “Yeah, it was just a setup my sister arranged. It was... fine.”
You felt a pang of jealousy and frustration, struggling to ignore the growing lump in your throat. You shifted in your seat, trying to refocus on the game, but your movements became increasingly erratic.
Your fingers pressed random buttons, desperately trying to regain control, but it only made things worse. The game character on the screen flailed aimlessly.
“Stop dying! You’re pulling us down!” Taehyun yelled, clearly exasperated with your lack of focus.
The criticism hit a nerve, and you snapped, unable to keep your frustration in check. “Oh, sure, blame it on me, Taehyun! Maybe if you hadn’t brought up Kai’s stupid blind date, I wouldn’t be so distracted!”
Taehyun looked taken aback, his eyes widening in surprise. “What does that have to do with anything?”
“It’s just... annoying!” you shot back, your voice sharp. “I’m trying to focus, and all I can think about is how—”
You suddenly noticed the three boys staring at you with wide eyes.
Realizing you’d let your frustration get the better of you, you quickly backpedaled. “I mean—sorry. I was just distracted,” you said, your voice trailing off awkwardly as you tried to recover from the outburst.
Beomgyu, ever observant, immediately noticed the shift in your demeanor. He shot you a sideways glance.
“Hey,” he said quietly, leaning in a bit closer so only you could hear, “I know you’re upset. Just take a deep breath.”
You met his gaze and saw the empathy in his eyes. 
“Thanks,” you murmured.
Meanwhile, Taehyun was still chatting away about the date, completely oblivious to the tension. “So, how did it go, Kai? Did you have a good time?”
Kai shrugged again, looking a bit uncomfortable. “It was okay. We talked, had dinner. Nothing special.”
You clenched your jaw, trying to mask the jealousy. You had no right to be upset, but the idea of Kai with someone else was expectedly hard to handle.
Like you said, curse.
It had been a couple of weeks since you last hung out with Kai, and you'd been avoiding him, using work as an excuse. You hoped everyone bought it, though Beomgyu didn’t seem convinced. But you didn’t care. You had already turned down Friday night dinners twice in a row, and there was no way you could get away with skipping a third time. So here you were, back at their place, feeling a knot of nerves twist in your stomach.
You wouldn’t admit it to anyone, but you were terrified it’d be awkward with Kai. Ever since you found out about his blind date, your feelings had been gnawing at you relentlessly, making every thought of him more painful. You feared how being around him might make those emotions harder to suppress especially since you almost gave yourself away the previous time.
But when you arrived at his house, all your worries evaporated the moment Kai pulled you into a tight bearhug. "I missed you so much!" he exclaimed, his voice warm and genuine. You found yourself melting into the embrace, forgetting every ounce of awkwardness and jealousy. For a brief moment, all that mattered was the familiar comfort of his arms around you, and everything else faded away.
You loved being in his arms. Kai felt like a giant teddy bear, soft and comforting in a way that made you feel safe. You had thought about it many times before—if comfort could take the form of a person, it would be him. His hugs were the kind that melted away stress, and being close to him felt like home. No matter how anxious or upset you were, being in his arms always made you forget, even if just for a little while.
“I missed you too," you fumbled out, your voice softer than intended.
"God! It's been two weeks, but it feels like a year!" he laughed, pulling you over to the sofa. His excitement and warmth made you feel like you’d never been away. 
"I knew you were busy the last couple of weeks," he said, reaching for his phone and opening the notes app. "So I made a list." He grinned, scrolling through it. "Here are just some things you missed during our dinners."
"You wrote them down on your notes app?" you giggled, genuinely amused by the thought of him keeping track of everything just for you.
"Of course," he replied with a playful glint in his eyes. "I can’t leave you out."
You don’t think he realizes just how sweet he is—or how incredibly frustrating it is that he's constantly this sweet. You're pretty sure he has no idea how much you want to scream every time he makes you feel this way. It was maddening, really, how effortlessly he could make your heart race with just a few words or a simple smile.
It had been about an hour since Kai filled you in on the events of the past two weeks. From what you gathered, Beomgyu sharted in his pants when he had diarrhoea from eating at a place down the street and Taehyun got drunk and wasted $500 sending TikTok gifts to Yeonjun during a live dance stream.
It seemed plausible enough. You missed them. Two weeks had passed, but it was more than enough time for you to fully feel their absence. Sure, they checked in on you every day, flooding the group chat, but you didn't respond—afraid you'd accidentally reveal your feelings for Kai. You weren’t about to make that mistake.
Still, you were starting to realize that avoiding them felt incredibly immature. You had forgotten just how much you loved your friends—and how much they loved you. Every part of you wished they wouldn’t change, not even a little. You wanted them to stay exactly as they were, unchanged and constant.
It was possibly why you were so adamant about keeping your feelings for Kai to yourself. The thought of confessing felt risky, one wrong move and the most precious friendship you’ve ever had could shatter. You couldn’t bear to be the one who ruined that.
Still…you wondered, how long you could take before you finally cracked.
“Do you think… we’ll still be friends when we’re older?” you asked, your voice soft and a bit uncertain.
Kai tilted his head, considering the question. “Like Yeonjun old or like my dad old?”
You laughed, trying to clarify, “Like, y’know, further into our adulthood.”
“Like when we have kids?” he asked, his tone casual but with a hint of curiosity.
“We?” Your heart skipped a beat, suddenly racing. The idea of him envisioning a future with you was both exhilarating and terrifying.
“Yeah?” He paused, looking at you with a thoughtful expression. “Like when you have your own family and I have mine.”
You nodded either way.
Kai looked at you with a genuine, reassuring smile. “Why wouldn’t we be?” he asked, his eyes warm and sincere. “We’ve been through so much together. Why wouldn’t we stay friends?”
Sure, you took some sort of comfort from his reassurance but there was a part of you still grappling with the realization that your feelings might never align with his. 
You took a deep breath, forcing a smile as you met his gaze. “Mhm.”
Kai’s smile widened, and he playfully nudged you with his elbow. “C’mon. We’ll still be annoying each other, like always.”
You laughed softly, “I wouldn’t have it any other way.”
"We won't change."
As you looked over at him, your eyes began to well up with tears. You looked away, pretending that you weren’t actually about to sob. 
Kai’s gaze softened when he noticed the glistening in your eyes. He placed his hands gently on your thigh, as if sensing that something was troubling you, though he couldn’t quite pinpoint what it was.
“I promise,” he said softly.
“Right…sorry..I’m just–”
“It’s fine. I get it.” He nodded, cutting you off. “You don’t have to explain.”
You often wondered how someone who knew you so well didn’t have any idea that you liked him. The thought was both comforting and frustrating. 
“Anyway, there’s still like 3 more things on my list.” Kai said, showing you his notes app.
You nodded, “All ears!” 
Despite enjoying Kai’s animated recounting of the ridiculous things Beomgyu had done the week before, your mind was a tangled mess of thoughts about his recent blind date.
You tried to focus on the present, nodding and laughing along, but the image of him with someone else kept intruding.
You hesitated, your fingers nervously tracing patterns on the armrest of the sofa. You took a deep breath as you waited for Kai to finally finish his last story. 
“Hey, Kai, can I ask you something?” you finally managed to say, your voice barely above a whisper. Your heart pounded in your chest as you waited for his response.
“Sure, what’s up?” he replied, still looking relaxed and upbeat.
“So, about that blind date your sister set you up on…” you began, your tone more serious now. “How did it–um– go?”
Kai’s expression shifted slightly, and he leaned back, thinking for a moment. “Oh, that. It was... okay. We had dinner and talked a bit. It was nice, but nothing special.”
You tried to mask your disappointment, nodding slowly. “I see.”
Kai looked at you with a hint of curiosity. “Why? What’s up?”
You shrugged, forcing a casual tone. “Oh! Nothing. I was just–uh–curious!”
“Well, to be honest,” he started, “the date was actually kind of fun. She was really nice and pretty. We had a good time talking and hanging out. She’s been asking me out on another date, but I’m not sure if I should go.”
You felt a wave of jealousy bubbling inside you, but you tried to keep your voice steady. “That’s nice!” you said, forcing a smile. “You should go.”
As soon as the words left your mouth, you winced inwardly, realizing the absurdity of what you’d just said. Here you were, encouraging the guy you had feelings for to go out on another date.
You looked down at your hands, trying to hide the flush of embarrassment creeping up your cheeks. “I mean… it’s your choice. Do what you think is right,” you stammered, trying to backtrack.
You tried to shake off the discomfort, but the conversation with Kai had left you feeling unsettled. As your phone rang, you seized the opportunity to shift focus.
“Hey, Beomgyu. What’s up?” you answered, trying to sound casual.
“Hey!” Beomgyu’s voice came through the speaker. “Just wanted to let you know we’ve got a busted tire. We’re going to be home 2-3 hours later than usual.”
“Shit, you guys okay?” 
“Yeah, we’re fine,” Beomgyu replied, chuckling. “Taehyun’s totally losing it with his insurance company. It’s kinda hilarious. I’ll send you a video in the group chat.”
You heard Beomgyu laughing, and then Taehyun’s distant shouting.
“Fuck. He’s coming over to yell at me to delete it,” Beomgyu added quickly.
“Yeah, okay,” you said, trying to ignore the awkwardness from earlier. “I’ll see you guys later.”
You hung up and looked over at Kai, who was watching you with a curious expression.
“Well,” you said, attempting to lighten the mood, “looks like it’s just us for dinner tonight.”
Kai grinned, clearly unfazed by the earlier conversation. “Perfect. More time for us to catch up.”
Whatever he had just said did nothing to quell the storm of emotions swirling inside you. You couldn’t help but think, Curse you, Huening Kai, you perfect son of a bitch, as you watched him move about the kitchen, completely unaware of the effect he had on you. 
“Can you pass me the salt?” “Hey…” “Dude!”
You suddenly felt a flick on your forehead and snapped out of your thoughts, turning to Kai, who had been trying to get your attention for a while.
“Oh! Yep. You should!” you blurted out. “You should totally try a new hairstyle.”
Kai laughed, the sound warm and reassuring. “We’ve moved on from that topic.” His expression softened as he leaned in, gently placing his hand on your forehead. “You alright? Are you feeling sick?”
His hand was surprisingly warm against your skin, and if his touch lingered even a moment longer, you were certain your cheeks would be hotter than the soup you were drinking. You nodded quickly, trying to brush off the heat rising to your face.
“Are you sure? It feels like you’re getting warmer,” Kai said, his voice tinged with concern.
Embarrassed, you pushed his hand away, the warmth of his touch still lingering. “It’s probably just the summer heat.”
“You sure?” he asked, still looking worried.
You nodded again, trying to sound more convincing. “Yep.”
“Hold on, you have a little…” He leaned in and gently used his thumb to wipe a small crumb from your lip.
The unexpected touch of his thumb against your lip sent a jolt through you. Startled by the sudden closeness and the tender gesture, you fumbled with the bowl of soup. In your flustered state, your hand slipped, and the bowl tipped over. 
You abruptly stood up, wincing as a sharp, stinging pain shot through your foot. “Fuck,” you cursed under your breath, your voice tinged with frustration.
Kai’s face immediately filled with concern. He hurriedly rushed over to your side of the table, reaching for the spilled food and trying to help you clean up. “Are you okay?” he asked, his tone anxious.
“I’m good!” you said quickly, trying to push his hands away. You didn’t want him to see how flustered and embarrassed you were. His touch was warm, but right now, you just wanted to avoid any more attention.
You noticed a flicker of hurt in his eyes before you shook your head, trying to reassure him. “I didn’t mean to—I just—I should go get this cleaned up.” You quickly made your way to the bathroom, your heart pounding as you tried to escape the situation.
You heard Kai’s footsteps follow closely behind you. As you entered the bathroom, he called out, “The first aid’s under the sink.” There was a sigh in his voice, a mixture of frustration and concern. “You sure you’re okay?”
You nodded, even though he couldn’t see you through the closed door. “Yep,” you called back, trying to sound more confident than you felt.
Silence continued between the two of you as you carefully bandaged your scalded thigh. The faint rustling of Kai’s movements outside the door made it clear he was still there, waiting.
Then, you heard him whisper, almost too softly to catch, “There’s something wrong between us.”
You stayed silent, not trusting yourself to respond.
A moment later, his voice grew a bit louder as he repeated, “You sure you’re okay?”
“Yep.” You replied.
“You sure we’re okay?” Kai’s voice softened.
You didn’t answer, letting the silence stretch between you. Each second felt like an eternity, your mind racing as you tried to gather your thoughts. You could hear the faint rustling of Kai’s movements outside the door.
Finally, you took a deep breath and emerged from the bathroom, the bandage awkwardly wrapped around your leg. Kai stood there, looking at you with a mixture of worry and something else you couldn’t quite place.
“Sorry about that,” you said, forcing a smile. “It’s just a minor burn. Nothing to worry about.”
Kai’s eyes softened, though he still looked concerned. “It’s not just about the burn, is it?” He stepped closer, his gaze searching yours. “Something’s been off for a while now. I can’t help but feel like you’re distancing yourself from me.”
You felt a lump form in your throat, the vulnerability of the moment making it hard to speak. “It’s complicated,” you finally admitted, your voice barely above a whisper. “I’ve been dealing with a lot of emotions lately, and I didn’t want to drag you into it.”
Kai’s expression shifted from concern to understanding, and he reached out, gently touching your arm. “You don’t have to go through things alone. If something’s wrong, I want to be here for you. I care about you too much to let things stay this way.”
His words struck a chord, and you felt your resolve begin to crumble. The warmth of his hand on your arm, combined with the sincerity in his eyes, made it hard to hold back your feelings.
“I—” you started, but the words caught in your throat. You looked down, struggling to find the right way to express what you were feeling. “I just… I didn’t want to make things awkward or complicated.”
Kai shook his head slightly, his gaze never leaving yours. "Please,” he whispered. “Just let me share the pain you're going through."
You met his eyes, finally allowing yourself to be vulnerable. “I… I care about you a lot, Kai. More than I thought I could.”
Kai’s expression softened further, and he took a step closer. “I care about you too.”
He didn’t get it. He didn’t understand the implication of what you were trying to say—that you liked him. That you cared about him differently from how you cared about Beomgyu and Taehyun.
You forced a smile. “Thank you. Let’s get back out there.” You nudged his shoulder.
He shook his head. “No.” He gently pulled you back, stopping you in your tracks.
“Kai…”
“No,” he repeated, his grip firm but gentle, careful not to hurt you. He guided you to the wall and leaned you against it softly. “I don’t want to leave it like this. I don’t know what this is, but I don’t feel like we’re okay.”
“We are.”
“You’re lying,” he sighed.
“I’m not—”
“Your eyes,” Kai said softly, “they tell me everything I need to know.”
“Are they telling you anything else?” you asked, your frustration clearly showing. “Since you know me so well, can you read anything else in my eyes?”
“Why are you getting mad at me?” Kai asked, his voice getting slightly louder, confusion and hurt in his voice.
“Because!” you snapped, your voice rising with anger. “Because!”
“Because what?!” Kai shouted back, his own frustration surfacing. “It’s like you don’t even want me around anymore!”
“And who said that? Stop assuming everything about me!” you yelled, your voice trembling with emotion. “Stop acting like you know everything about me!”
“Don’t I?!” he exclaimed, frustration evident in his tone.
You scoffed, rolling your eyes. “You’re always going on about how much you know me, but do you really? You can’t even—” You paused, the words caught in your throat.
“Can’t even what? Notice that you’re avoiding me?” Kai’s voice was tinged with hurt and confusion.
The room was charged with tension. Your heart raced as you faced each other, your eyes locked with his despite your desperate urge to look away. His voice dripped with anger, and his eyes shimmered with a deep, wounded hurt. 
“Have you or have you not been avoiding me?” Kai asked, his voice dropping to a deeper, more serious tone.
“I wasn’t igno—”
“You’re lying.”
“I wasn’t intentionally ignoring you,” you admitted, your voice barely above a whisper, filled with apprehension.
Kai’s shoulders slumped in defeat, his voice cracking with vulnerability. “W-why? Did I do something wrong? Did I say something wrong? Listen, whatever I did, I’m sorry—”
"You didn’t do anything." You sighed, burying your face in your hands.
"Then... why have you been avoiding me?" Kai gently pulled your hands away from your face, lifting your chin so you’d meet his gaze. His eyes searched yours.
“I–”
"You don’t think I’ve noticed? How you've barely been texting me, or the group? We used to talk every day. And now, for the past two weeks, it’s just been me... constantly asking about you. And the only person who seems to know anything is Beomgyu. Not even me." His voice cracked with frustration. "It used to be us. Just the two of us against everything. But now—"
“I—I’ve been going through some things on my own. You don’t have to know everything about me, Kai,” you said, your tone sharper than intended.
It almost felt ironic, and just as infuriating, that he stood there acting as if he truly understood you, when he didn’t even realize the most important thing—your feelings. 
“We’re supposed to be best friends. What happened to being friends till we grow old?” Kai’s voice cracked, as if the weight of the words would somehow pull you back to him.
“Some of us don’t want that,” you snapped, your self-restraint finally shattering. The words left your lips before you could stop them, sharp and unforgiving.
Kai froze, staring at you in disbelief. The hurt in his eyes was unmistakable. Slowly, the grip he still had on your arm loosened, his hands falling to his sides, as though the very act of holding on had become too heavy.
“Kai—” you sighed, realizing your words had gone too far.
“No. I’m—I—” he cut you off, sighing heavily as he pushed his hair back. “I’m an idiot.”
“Kai—” you tried again, your voice softer, unsure of how to fix what had just happened.
He stayed silent, inching away from you slowly. Then, without a word, he knelt down to look at your injured leg. “Feel better,” he murmured, gently tracing the edge of the hasty bandage wrapped around your thigh.
He stood up to walk away, the silence between you growing heavier with each step. But just as he turned, your frustration finally boiled over, pushing you past the breaking point. You couldn't hold it in any longer.
With a voice raw and desperate, you shouted, “I LIKE YOU!” Your eyes were wide and your chest heaved with the effort of the outburst. The words seemed to crackle in the air, and your hands clenched into fists at your sides, trembling slightly as the intensity of your emotions took hold.
Kai froze in his tracks, his back still turned to you. The air between you crackled with the weight of your confession, the echo of your words hanging in the silence. You stood there, heart racing, unable to believe you had actually said it.
Slowly, Kai turned to face you, his eyes wide with shock and something else you couldn’t quite place—hope, maybe? Confusion? Possibly.
You swallowed hard, “I—I didn’t mean to shout,” you stammered. “But I’ve been holding it in for so long, and I just… I didn’t know how else to say it.”
Kai’s expression softened, his brows furrowing as he processed your words. “You like me?” he repeated, his voice barely above a whisper, as if he wasn’t sure he heard you right.
You nodded, “I just thought if I kept my distance, maybe it would go away… but it didn’t.”
He took a tentative step closer, his eyes never leaving yours. “Why didn’t you just tell me?”
“I was scared,” you admitted, your voice trembling as you spoke. Your hands fidgeted, fingers twisting nervously. “Scared that it would ruin everything between us. Scared you wouldn’t feel the same. And the blind date that Taehy—”
“It wasn’t even that serious to begin with, my sisters were just sick of hearing me complain about–well about you.” he interrupted, his tone gentle but firm. He took a step closer, his expression softening as he reached out, his hand almost brushing yours.
“Me?” 
Kai let out a breath, his shoulders relaxing as the tension between you began to fade. “I never knew,” he said softly, taking another step closer. “But… you didn’t have to be scared. I—”
He hesitated, his voice catching in his throat, before finally meeting your gaze. “I like you too.”
“Oh.” 
“Yeah. Oh,” Kai mumbled, awkwardly scratching the back of his head, clearly unsure of what to do next.
You laughed, the tension breaking slightly. “No one ever tells you what to do after… a confession.”
Kai chuckled softly. “I figured Beomgyu might know what to do. He’s been egging me on to tell you how I feel.”
“He has?” you asked, surprised.
Kai nodded, and a brief silence settled between the two of you, heavy but not uncomfortable. Finally, he spoke again. “I’m sorry.”
“What? Why?” you asked, confused.
“I should’ve told you sooner, when I had the chance. I didn’t realize that keeping it in would hurt you, and that was never my intention.” His voice softened, regret evident in every word.
“That makes the two of us,” you giggled shyly. “Well, I wasn’t exactly broadcasting my single status and going on blind dates, but still—” you teased playfully.
“For the record,” Kai said, scratching the back of his head with a sheepish grin, “my sisters were only sick of me complaining about how much I like you and how much of a coward I am for not telling you.”
“Oh. What exactly have you been complaining about?” You teased.
Kai’s cheeks pinked, “N-nothing. Nothing important.”
“Really? You do know I have Hiyyih’s Insta. I could probably just ask her myself,” you said with a mischievous grin.
“You wouldn’t.”
You nodded, a playful glint in your eye. “I absolutely would. So it’s either you give me a summarized version and keep the details to yourself, or I get the 100% detailed account from Hiyyih.”
“It’s not even—I just… you have to promise me you won’t laugh. Or make fun of me.”
“Promise.” You said, pretending to zip your lips with a playful wink. 
Your eyes were filled with genuine adoration for the man standing before you. His vulnerability was written all over his face, and it only made your heart swell. Your gaze softened, allowing the affection you'd kept hidden for so long to shine through. After years of bottling up your feelings, you could finally show them, even if only a little.
“Well, uh… this is so embarrassing,” he mumbled quietly to himself, taking a deep breath to steady himself. “I’d tell them how… uh… pretty you looked every time we went out together,” he said slowly.
“Uh-huh…” You nodded, encouraging him to continue.
“And I’d tell them how you didn’t deserve the guys you were dating. How they were all assholes,” he went on, his voice growing louder and more passionate as he gained confidence with each word.
“And I’d tell them how much you deserve someone who genuinely loves you, someone who knows how funny you are, how quiet you get when you’re overanalyzing something, how loud you become when you're passionate, and how loving and protective you are to the people who matter to you.” He gulped, his voice shaking with emotion.
“How… much I deserved you,” he finished, his gaze searching yours.
You stood there, feeling a rush of warmth flood your cheeks. Your mind raced, but no words came. All you could manage was a soft, hesitant “Umm…”
Kai’s gaze was fixed on you, a mixture of hope and apprehension in his eyes. Seeing your struggle to find the right words, he took a deep breath and gently took your hands in his. 
You hated to admit it, but Kai seemed to be winning the confession game you had inadvertently started.
As his words settled, you found yourself slowly leaning in, your heart racing with a mix of excitement and nervous anticipation. Kai’s eyes fluttered shut, and he met you halfway. His lips gently brushed against yours, the kiss starting soft and tentative.
Your hands gripped his, pulling him closer as the kiss deepened. You felt Kai’s arms wrap around your waist, guiding you gently against the wall.
“God, I like you so much,” he whispered into the kiss.
Just as you were losing yourself in the moment, the abrupt sound of the door slamming open ruined the moment the two of you had.
“WE’RE HOME!” 
Taehyun and Beomgyu burst into the room, their eyes widening in disbelief as they took in the sight of you and Kai locked in a kiss.
“What the—” Taehyun’s voice came out as a high-pitched yelp, his hand flying to his mouth in shock.
The room was filled with a jumble of screams—your and Kai’s shocked cries mixing with Taehyun’s and Beomgyu’s high-pitched shouts. The noise was deafening, with each of you trying to out-scream the other. 
“YOU’RE NOT SUPPOSED TO BE HOME!” you yelled.
“THE GUYS AT THE TOWING COMPANY SENT US HOME BECAUSE THEY LIKED ME! WHAT WAS I SUPPOSED TO DO?!” Taehyun shouted back.
“DO YOU EVER KNOCK?!” Kai yelled at the two of them.
“THIS IS A SHARED APARTMENT, YOU IDIOT!” Beomgyu countered.
“Enough about us! What the heck are you two doing? Spit-swapping in front of us like that?” Taehyun yelled.
You and Kai stood there, red-faced and speechless, your hands still intertwined but your mouths firmly shut. The embarrassment was palpable as you both tried to avoid eye contact, your cheeks burning with the sudden realization of being caught.
“We—uh…”
“We—”
The two of you glanced at each other, then back at Taehyun and Beomgyu.
“We…”
“Spit it out!” Beomgyu rolled his eyes, clearly impatient.
“We like each other?” Kai managed to fumble out, his voice trembling slightly.
At that moment, the room erupted into a new kind of chaos. Taehyun and Beomgyu, now visibly relieved and overjoyed, screamed with happiness.
“FINALLY!” Taehyun shouted, his voice a mix of triumph and excitement. “I KNEW IT!”
“Oh my god!” Beomgyu exclaimed, clapping his hands together in delight. “We can finally sleep in peace!”
“No more emo Huening Kai nights!”
“No more sad songs!”
Beomgyu and Taehyun grabbed each other’s hands, jumping in circles and celebrating for reasons you couldn’t quite grasp.
“Emo Huening Kai nights?” you asked, raising an eyebrow.
“Every time you went out on a date with someone, Kai would come home with this sad look on his face,” Taehyun explained. “He wouldn’t want to play any games or do anything fun.”
“He’d just pout, act like a baby, order Chinese takeout, and then moan about how the guy you were dating didn’t deserve you,” Beomgyu continued, trying to hold back his laughter.
You looked at Kai, who was now blushing deeply and rolling his eyes in mock annoyance. “Well, that explains a lot,” you said, chuckling.
“When you both explain it like that, it makes me sound pathetic,” Kai said, shaking his head.
“But it was pathetic?” Beomgyu asked, raising an eyebrow.
“I think it’s cute,” you said with a smile.
“Gross,” Beomgyu said, scrunching up his face in mock disgust. “Wait, does this mean we’ll have to see this more often? GROSS!”
“I can’t believe Huening found a girl before us,” Taehyun sighed, shaking his head in disbelief.
“It’s possible that the two of you lack a certain charisma,” Kai replied with a teasing grin.
“Oh, and you have it?” Taehyun laughed, raising an eyebrow.
“Well, I do have the world’s greatest girlfriend,” Kai said, glancing at you with a proud smile.
“Girlfriend?” You teased, your eyes twinkling with mischief. “Who said anything about me being your girlfriend?”
Kai’s face turned a shade redder as he stammered, “Well, I—I just thought—”
“Thought what?” you interrupted, a playful smirk on your lips. “That I’d be your girlfriend even if you didn’t ask? I’m not that easy.”
“I’m sorry,” Beomgyu interjected, “You’re a little confident right now. Aren’t you the same girl who messaged me about how Kai looked like he had the most pillowy, kissable lips you’d ever seen?”
Your cheeks heated up. “CHOI BEOMGYU!”
“Oh, and also that cute little private TikTok you did after you cried over Kai…? Really cute,” Beomgyu continued, his grin widening.
In a desperate bid to stop him from revealing more, you clenched your fists and lunged at Beomgyu. You jumped onto his back and covered his mouth with your hands, muffling his voice before he could spill any more secrets. 
Taehyun and Kai erupted into giggles, but Kai's laughter suddenly faltered as he realized, “Wait… what TikTok?”
“She did a TikTok where—” Beomgyu started, but you quickly shoved your hands over his mouth, pressing down firmly to silence him.
Unfortunately, Beomgyu was way stronger than you. With one swift move, he had you slung over his shoulder, your legs flailing as you tried to wriggle free.
“Fine. I won’t tell. Yet,” Beomgyu said with a mischievous grin.
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wehaveagathering · 2 days
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Just curious, what was the skate like irl? Who didn’t even finish/ who did better than the rest??
Oh, I love you for this question. Buckle up.
First of all, I think there are a bunch of misconceptions about what 👹Tort's Rope👹 actually is and how it works. I had not a clue how it worked until today, and literally a week ago I thought Torts was tying ropes to hockey players and having them drag each other around the ice... Not how it works.
So, John Tortorella's bag skate. First, the rope is marked in large sections and tied between two goals, placed a little closer together than usual. The players are split up into 4 groups of approximately 4 players each and sent to the four corners of the rink. When Torts blows his whistle, one player from each group completes 4 laps of the goals and returns to their corner; the next player up is sent off on his own laps, and so on and so forth. Once each player in each group has completed his first four laps, the two goals are widened to a new length marked on the rope and the first player is back up. It's not a test of time or speed; it's a test of endurance.
(Those numbers are rough estimates based off of what I saw today — it could be three laps, and I don't know how many reps they did. The actual schedule says 3x8 Lap which is the technical term for 👹Tort's Rope👹 but I thought I saw four laps. Eight reps sounds about right, too. Whatever! The actual numbers don't matter too much.)
What matters is that the player completes his laps and returns to his origination point, no matter how tired he is. His teammates can give him a pat on the back, or some tips and pointers, or they can stare into the blank void of space and consider a new career path. Whatever it is, he has to finish. So "not finishing" isn't really an option unless someone throws up or passes out or dies. And no one did that — so technically, everyone finished.
Some people certainly had an easier time than others. I noticed that Michkov and Bonk struggled quite a bit, and Jamie didn't look too thrilled either.
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Travis Ballinghoff.
Which kinda sucked, because I was really rooting for them. But holy shit, Michkov was struggling. Charlie O Connor actually said in the PHLY podcast today that he noticed Michkov kind of cut his final lap short at one point and that John Tortorella came over to him and was like yo. can't do that. And for the rest of the time he pulled through.
Egor Zamula kept getting yelled at. "Let's go, Z! Keep skating, Z!" He also kept getting lapped by Rasmus Ristolainen. Tyson Foerster had "kill me now" face (see Bonk above) but Foerster does tend to have a pretty expressive face. Sean Couturier kept getting help from TK, who skated right behind him for the most part and kept pushing him forward with his stick. He even admitted it.
It seemed to me that most of the guys from last year, the returning ones, were the ones that did the best. Farabee, Frost, Tippett, Hathaway, Poehling, Laughton — they all had a routine in between their laps that they used to help keep them going, whether it was motivatinal or physiological or psychological. Farabee and Hathaway skated up and down the rope, in the center of the lapping players. Tippett stretched on the boards. (He's flexible. 👀)
It was interesting to watch who was fast, though. Ronnie Attard looked like he was having the time of his fucking life, and he actually did very well! Carter Sotheran has resting happy face, but I can't imagine he was having any fun. Jett Luchanko was certainly winded, but pulled through with minimal painful expressions. (Erik Johnson went on the record to say Luchanko looked like he didn't even have to try.) Zayde Wisdom, Noah Cates and Cam York all paced themselves well. But everyone, no matter who it was, was slowing down by the second or third rep — very visibly. It looked awful.
And then — and then! — they had to do shuttles. This one was in groups of four — started at one end, raced to the other end, tight turn, back to the original spot. Then a group of four at the opposite end, who were waiting, would do the same, and the small groups would switch off. They must have done at least five reps. No one fared well on these. No one. They were all lagging by the second rep.
Anyway, to answer your question, it was loud, and it was cold, and hockey players are big. The tallest ones were like hovering a foot over me (looking at you, Matteo Mann, what the fuck are you so tall for??) and even Michkov at 5'11 looked fucking ginormous. And his group was right near me — him, Frost, Seeler, and Lycksell. Frost was tiring but I could see him grit his teeth and grind out his laps. I assume after the emotional pain of John Tortorella, Frosty can handle the physical pain too. After one of his laps was done he gave Michkov a lil side hug. It was really cute!
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Travis Ballinghoff.
Off topic, but stick "taps" — that's bad nomenclature, right there. A stick "tap" at the Vorhees TC sounds like a car backfiring.
At the end of every group's torture, they settled down for a circle stretch. TK went around the first one talking to guys and grinning and laughing. He looked like a leader. The second one Joel was going around making every guy give him a little fistbump. Then the third one was actually led by Spencer Gill, who I thought had done reasonably well, especially for having only just been drafted. He held his own.
Thank you for the ask!
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iamgonnagetyouback · 6 hours
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Jess Mariano taking care of sick reader? They're not together yet so she's confused because wtf why is he taking care of me? But he shows up at her house with food, medicine, blankets, etc. and just kinda lets himself in when she answers the door.
Inspired by the episode where he brings Rory food when she's home alone and also by the fact that I stayed home from school sick today 😔
𝟷𝚔 || 𝐅𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐑 𝐃𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐌
♡ ︎ꜱᴜᴍᴍᴀʀʏ: Jess was the person you least expected to take care of you when you were sick.
♡ ︎ᴡᴀʀɴɪɴɢꜱ: None
♡ ︎ꜱʜɪᴘ: Jess Mariano x sick!Reader
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You groaned as you shuffled your way to the door, wrapped in a blanket and feeling like absolute death. Your head pounded, throat raw, and the world seemed a little fuzzier than usual. You were barely functioning when a knock echoed through your small apartment, a sound that made you groan louder.
You weren’t expecting anyone—definitely didn’t want anyone to see you like this—so you contemplated ignoring it. But the knocking persisted.
With a resigned sigh, you unlocked the door and cracked it open just enough to peek out. Your eyes widened when you saw none other than Jess Mariano standing on your doorstep. He was holding a bag of takeout in one hand, a plastic bag full of what looked like medicine in the other, and a blanket slung over his shoulder. His usual expression was one of bored disinterest, but you could see the subtle flicker of concern in his eyes.
“Jess?” You rasped, blinking at him in confusion. “What are you—”
He didn’t wait for you to finish. Before you could protest or even think, Jess slipped past you, letting himself into your apartment like he owned the place. “You look like death,” he said, shutting the door behind him, his tone casual but with a hint of something softer underneath.
“Thanks?” you muttered, feeling both bewildered and slightly offended, though you couldn’t deny he was right. “What are you doing here?”
Jess placed the bags on your kitchen counter, glancing at you over his shoulder. “I heard you were sick.”
“I—how?” You leaned against the doorframe for support, still trying to wrap your head around the fact that Jess Mariano was in your apartment. With food. And medicine. “Who told you?”
“Luke mentioned it.” He shrugged, as if this wasn’t a big deal. “Figured you could use some help.”
“I—” You trailed off, completely unsure how to respond to that. Jess? Showing up at your place to help? It felt like you’d entered some kind of fever dream.
“Sit down,” Jess ordered gently, his hands now occupied with unpacking the takeout containers and organizing the medicine on your counter like he’d done this a hundred times before. “You’re supposed to be resting, not playing twenty questions.”
Your brain was struggling to keep up with what was happening. “I… you didn’t have to come. I’m fine.”
Jess shot you a look, raising an eyebrow. “You look fine,” he said sarcastically, but his eyes lingered on you a second too long, and you caught that worried edge again. “Sit. Seriously.”
You shuffled over to your couch, plopping down with a huff. You watched as Jess moved around your kitchen like it was nothing, grabbing a spoon for the soup, pouring a glass of water, even pulling out a bottle of cough syrup.
“Are you always this bossy?” you muttered, half-annoyed, half-touched by how much he was doing.
“Only with people who don’t take care of themselves.” He smirked, bringing over a steaming container of soup. “Here. Eat.”
You blinked up at him, still not fully comprehending why he was doing this. “Why are you—why do you care?” The words tumbled out before you could stop them.
Jess didn’t answer immediately. Instead, he sat beside you on the couch, close enough that you could feel the warmth radiating off him, but still leaving enough space to keep things from getting awkward. He glanced at you, his expression softer than you were used to. “Someone’s gotta make sure you don’t pass out alone in here.”
His tone was teasing, but you could hear the concern laced in his words, and that only made you more confused—and flustered. Why did he care? You weren’t… you weren’t anything. Not yet, anyway.
“You’re acting weird,” you mumbled, taking a hesitant sip of the soup. “This is… nice. You’re not usually nice.”
Jess chuckled under his breath, running a hand through his hair. “Don’t get used to it.”
The two of you sat in a comfortable silence for a moment, the only sound being the clink of the spoon against the container as you ate. Jess glanced around your apartment, making small talk here and there, but you couldn’t help but notice how he kept sneaking glances at you, like he was checking to make sure you were okay.
After a while, you broke the silence, your voice soft. “Thanks. For, you know, all this.”
Jess shrugged again, but there was something different in the way he did it this time. “Don’t mention it.”
You stared at him for a beat longer than necessary, your heart doing something weird in your chest. He wasn’t the type to fuss, wasn’t the type to show up with soup and medicine for anyone—least of all you. But here he was, doing exactly that.
“You’re really weird, you know that?” you said, trying to break the tension, but your voice came out more affectionate than you intended.
Jess gave you a crooked smile, his eyes twinkling. “Takes one to know one.”
You rolled your eyes, but the smile tugging at your lips was impossible to suppress. Maybe this fever was making you delirious, but suddenly, you didn’t mind Jess being here. In fact, you kind of liked it.
Who knew Jess Mariano could be so… sweet?
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scrawnytreedemon · 1 year
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How to write Main Character: Make them feel unique,make them feel different but also familiar. Like you can see them everywhere at the same time nowhere
Or we can go the easy road and make one with God complex
I feel like ppl don't really make good main characters anymore. They feel the same these days
Ehhh???
Honestly, people do make good main characters, you just have to look. Usually easier to find in non-YA novels, in my experience. They tend to feel more like fleshed-out *people* with their own life-experience than vessels for the reader to insert themselves into,
Which, ironically enough, makes it easier for me to relate to them, even if we are otherwise very different people. If you make your character a person, then inevitably, some of those experiences line up.
If anything, trying to walk that tightrope of having your character just "unique" enough to be interesting while still "relatable" enough as to appeal to as many people as possible is where things can get muddy and you end up failing either way.
I think it tends to affect some genres more than others, but at the end of the day... It really isn't as bad of an issue as people make it out to be. Like, yeah. Mediocre literature exists. Things tend to be mid more than they are especially good or bad.
And I think that's fine.
Plus, tastes vary. There's no doubt alot of stuff I love that people will look at and say is subpar. There is no objective way of looking at fiction-- We all come in with our own biases.
I'm going offtopic. Hope the first half of this reply made sense. Apologies if I've completely misunderstood your point.
I dunno, I just hear these complaints, and it makes me think of alot of those shitty writing guides that I used to eat up (often made by amateur writers themselves), which were very insistent on finding the "right" way to write and ruthlessly mocking anything "bad."
I don't think that's what you were going for, at all, but I still think it's very generalising, and I'm not sure what to make of it?
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angy-grrr · 2 months
Text
spoilers for chapter 429
idk if you guys remember but ochako does have parallels with All Might, specifically as the side who saves. It’s not that he feels the same for them both or something like that, they serve to represent the type of heroism he naturally goes to; his friend is not his love interest, from his perspective she’s out there having a crisis over not being able to save her, and Izuku reminds her that she is a hero bc she is his hero -she saved him multiple times, and she should be able to feel like a proper hero.
This conversation is not about the nature of their relationship, is about heroism; Izuku relates to a conflict between being a hero who saves and failing to save someone, and doesn’t want to see Ochako ending spiraling because she couldn’t also fulfill that role as expected. She’s his hero not because he loves her romantically -he’s a nerd I’m sure he would be way more nervous and blushing if he was confessing anything he thought was romantic- but because she’s able to go and do what All Might does to Izuku, save him physically and emotionally.
He knows she hides her feelings in order to not be a burden, yet he doesn’t talk about his own feelings outside of his guilt in heroics -what does he feel about losing OFA? About his own failures? About the people he personally lost? He can’t talk for others and claim Ochako is everyone’s hero, but he can speak for himself, and that’s his personal perspective -she is a hero to him, she’s his hero. And then the class appears to make sure she’s able to get support and understand she’s not alone, and she’s important to them too.
but Izuku doesn’t get support. Izuku cries a little and talks a little about himself, but he doesn’t get supported. If this was meant to be romantic, I don’t understand why he would hold back what’s inside of him.
the end of the chapter reveals that boy is going to be helped by that woman who regretfully ignored Tenko, and they both witness it and are happy about it while hearing izuku inspired that change, and iida wonders what’s up with them -this is the conclusion to their relationship. In their hearts these two are saviors who struggle to be heroes who save others, and they are happy there are appearing more people who want to be heroes like them. Heroes who save. Save like All Might.
That grandma for example, interpreting the narrative as what I think is intended, would be that boy’s All Might; she’s his hero.
Izuku and Ochako are heroes who save, and Deku is here to remind her at least she did save him many times, that she is still a hero because she is his hero. I don’t believe is meant to be interpreted as romantic, not that Izuku sees that phrase as it neither -after all, he said he does want to be like All Might and feels good to imitate him, but he doesn’t love him.
Ochako’s All Might hair moment, the parallels with Toshinori telling him he can be a hero, the trying to save from black suffocating quirks, the we can do it and do your best…
Do I need to remind you heroes arent a romantic thing for Izuku Midoriya?
#grrr talking#bkdk#dkbk#bakudeku#dekubaku#I’m not saying I’m happy with the chapter#I have my criticisms#But I don’t want to keep seeing ppl say this is romantic and “izu///ocha canon we won bkdk dead”#First of all no it’s not even if it was canon we would still ship them and make content about them#Second of all this chapter was about ochako getting comfort not a boyfriend#Are we really sitting there believing they are together when ochako doesn’t struggle nor think about her crush at all#And her character goes way beyond liking him or not#And izuku hero nerd midoriya calls her his hero bc he sees all might savior qualities in her???#Bitch where’s the romance#And you know what? I don’t get it now#Bc ppl were all like “yeah it’s platonic” when izuku said he admired all might but katsuki was just right there closer to him#But now they see the whole “you are my hero” as a romantic confession? Fuck off#Personally I always felt kinda strange about that scene in bk vs dk 2#It focuses on the closeness and and it’s strange bc izuku doesn’t strive to be like him at all#He doesn’t want to be the victorious hero side nor want to be a angry and disrespectful when he gets angry#He just is#So. Yeah#ochako is part of the saving chain and she saved him multiple times since the beginning#This is his experience with her and she deserves to be acknowledged as the hero she is#Even if nobody else sees her as that including herself he sees it#She deserves to hear it#When she saved him during black whip with shinso’s help everyone else saw a romantic moment#Mina teased her about it and made things weird for them always trying to look into it as a romantic gesture#And it wasn’t. That was ochako being the hero she is and Izuku confirms that to her#She is a hero not a love interest
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batsplat · 3 months
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as our resident Casey expert i wonder what do you think would have happened if marc and casey competed against each other? since casey retiring is so important for marc coming into motogp im always thinking abt the what ifs...
my initial instinct with this hypothetical is always 'that sounds horrible', though I do have more thoughts and opinions about it than that! marc obviously would have loved the chance to race casey, and casey has even been one of his picks of 'guys he would've liked to be teammates with' before, so, you know, clearly something there - and he does very much respect casey as a rider. I think it's quite likely that by the time marc entered the premier class, casey had already developed... I don't know if wariness is going too far, but maybe a little bit of unease or caution where marc was concerned. marc already very much had a reputation based on his 125/moto2 track record, and some of these incidents were controversial enough that the motogp riders commented on them. so take the phillip island 2011 incident where marc rode into the back of another rider:
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the valentino quote serves as a bit of a benchmark here, given he was generally pretty pro-marc. yes, casey's phrasing is perhaps a little harsher, but unsurprisingly none of the riders were big fans of marc's behaviour in that particular incident
on the other hand, it's not like casey never sided with marc. take catalunya 2012, where marc was slapped with a controversial post-race penalty:
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yes, casey's main complaint was about inconsistent stewarding - but still, he believed marc had been unfairly treated here. feels like these incidents were some of the only things casey and valentino actually agreed on in those years, so that's nice
that being said, it's hard to see how casey wouldn't have his issues with marc and marc's whole approach to racing. I did include some thoughts on the teammate question here, but mainly I'm going to pilfer the relevant autobiography passage:
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"if a rider doesn't care about his own safety then it stands to reason he doesn't care about anybody else's either"... there's nobody really who embodies the 'doesn't care about his own safety' maxim better than marc. he was the young rider desperate to win, and I can't imagine casey would have enjoyed actually racing him much. casey mostly didn't enjoy racing valentino, after all, who is a generally a lot more selective with his aggression than marc is (though casey did have to experience some of the worst valentino had to offer in that regard). casey talked in his autobiography about getting a sense when he just wasn't really able to trust another rider on the track, how much it bothered him - and that exact lack of respect is something that's been pretty closely associated with marc. that doesn't mean he would immediately declare marc his enemy... he'd just want marc to change, to learn, to grow up, to start treating his competitors with a little more respect. the way casey talks about young riders, there is a sense in which he has more time for them than he does for valentino - whose lack of respect casey views as more integral to who he is as a rider. valentino isn't a bully on track due to the exuberance of youth, he's a bully on track when he thinks he can use it as a tactic of intimidation. then again, marc by this measure is worse... and I think very quickly casey would have grown pretty disenchanted with how marc approaches all his wheel-to-wheel racing, especially when it becomes more and more clear marc does not feel particularly inclined to change
it's always important to remember how recent the trauma of losing simoncelli was for the whole sport, and it coloured both dani and jorge's wariness of marc... but also (in my opinion anyway) their restraint in how they dealt with him. how they tried to stop themselves from actually making an enemy out of him, in part because they'd just had an experience of harshly criticising a rider for a whole year and then having to process his death. both dani and jorge actually had more public and more serious disagreements with simoncelli than casey did, but I reckon there would have been an element of that restraint with casey too... on the other hand, his experiences with marc would have left him feeling even more alienated from the sport than he already was - at times frustrated (like jorge was) less with marc directly but more with the regulatory bodies for not holding marc back, for not giving him a race ban or whatever to teach him a lesson. that being said, marc's shamelessness vs casey's stubbornness means that if they had direct on-track encounters and casey didn't like marc's post-race response... well, I certainly think that'd end up being a pretty tense situation, even if it falls short of active hostilities
worth including irl!casey's take on marc in 2013:
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which, you know. it's not just that marc's a hard racer - casey is accusing marc of deliberately wanting to make the defeats extra painful for his opponents, of wanting to not just beat but humiliate them. anyone else that reminds you of? someone who is as motivated in securing his psychological victories as his actual ones? perhaps someone who has a bit of a history himself with casey?
let's bring in valentino. it's not that casey would really have begrudged marc his friendship with valentino, and he generally kept his hatred of valentino quite 'clean' in that he wasn't conducting any proxy wars or anything (for instance, I don't get the sense the vale/sic friendship ever affected his view of simoncelli... though I have very little to go on here either way). also, if nothing else in this timeline changes, we're assuming valentino in 2013 is fairly clearly the... fifth? best rider? kinda depends where dani would have landed I suppose (casey's retirement announcement did save honda from a bit of a headache)... but anyway what this means is that valentino probably wouldn't initially have been much of a competitive threat to casey. mostly he would have been consigned to the sidelines
that being said, I doubt casey would have massively enjoyed the whole laguna seca saga. unfortunately, we don't even really know what real life casey's stance on the copycat move situation was... though if I had to guess, in this timeline I'd say his position would've been, a) marc could and should have carried out that overtake two corners later, there was no need in that race situation to take that risk, b) still, it was valentino's slight error as he attempted to reclaim the position (in what was a pretty aggressive manner, it has to be said) that led to them both ending up off-track and fuck that guy, and c) the problem with 2008 wasn't just or even primarily the corkscrew overtake and it's annoying that that's the only bit everyone talks about. of course, there's also the question of whether casey would have bought marc's explanation that it was totally by coincidence that the overtake happened there... and again, complete guesswork, but my sense of casey is that he would have assumed marc was being at least a little bit dishonest. (which, you know... laguna's not an easy track to overtake at, but marc did prove with the bradl move that he was perfectly capable of overtaking after turn 8 - might not have been planning on the off-track excursion, but he was still attempting to overtake just ahead of a blind crest that happened to feed into the corkscrew lol.) I think casey by his honda days had calmed down a bit (though he still certainly had some conspiratorial tendencies), but I also don't think it's a stretch to imagine that he would've felt like he was a victim of a joke between the pair of them... not ideal
overall though, I reckon casey's main frustrations would have been less with the move itself and more with how it was discussed. in the presser, while joking with marc, valentino does take the opportunity to get in a jibe at casey for old time's sake. there's this clip, where he directly addresses livio suppo (at ducati in 2008, by then at honda) - specifically about how both casey and suppo criticised him for that overtake. in response, suppo says something about how he's grateful to marc because they finally got payback. valentino is later asked directly about casey's complaints in 2008 in this clip, and replies with the following:
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would valentino have said this stuff with casey still in the paddock? well, yes! honestly, given valentino did very quickly lay off needling casey once he had retired, there's a good chance he would have said something worse. and marc would have laughed along at the whole thing. I don't know, I just don't see casey taking particularly kindly to that... he can hold a grudge, that man can, and at a certain point he'd probably be increasingly less willing to give marc the benefit of the doubt. interesting situation though, laguna seca '13 + casey is a very juicy scenario that could play out in several different ways
but I'm guilty of burying the lede here - there's a far more obvious reason than anything I've described above for why the casey/marc relationship would have turned sour. it's the simple fact that they would have been teammates which would do the damage all on its lonesome; they have radically different conceptualisations of how that dynamic is supposed to work and would inevitably have clashed as a result. the one commonality they do have is they don't see their teammates as potential friends, which is... also not helpful! I think they'd probably initially be fine on the interpersonal level - and, actually, given how the casey/valentino relationship played out and marc's general approach to his rivalries, I can see marc/casey more or less being able to maintain a minimum standard of politeness towards each other even at their worst. like, I still think they'd be able to smile at each other and do some small talk when face-to-face, but I also think everything else would be a complete disaster. I talked a bit about how marc approaches his teammate relationships in this post - and I'm not going to rehash too much of what irl!marc got up to, but I'll include some bits relevant to casey
from marc:
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related to casey:
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and dani comparing the two:
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we do obviously even have actual real life controversy wherein casey thinks marc felt threatened by him and forced him out of honda... and this in a timeline where they weren't even direct competitors! if this is the level of tension a test rider role can generate, then if they'd actually been teammates...? yeah, no. casey thinks that teammates should cooperate - and he thinks that riders enforcing divisions within the box are essentially doing so because they are "afraid". marc has openly admitted to lying about what parts he likes to make sure his teammate doesn't get any edge over him. this is the thing, right: marc might think casey is a cool rider, would've liked the chance to race him and even be teammates with him... but this is the stuff he did to dani, who was one of his literal idols! this is his understanding of competition - (like valentino) he might love the fight, but simultaneously he'll do pretty much whatever it takes to win, because he considers this stuff fundamentally part of the game. casey does not. to casey, this kind of victory is dishonest. any kind of gamesmanship is a sign of weakness... the victory is worth less if you're accomplishing it like that
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now, hey, maybe marc would never have been able to go as far as he did with dani because he wouldn't have the kind of performance edge that allows you to definitively impose your will within the team. I think it's a popular interpretation that marc wouldn't have won the title in 2013 if casey had been there, which... I mean, I think it's true that it would have been less likely - in that in a season with that much volatility, the more plausible championship contenders you have the less likely it is that any single one of them takes the title (same goes for instance if you add in a valentino who had not gone to ducati for two years and would have presumably been more competitive in 2013). but it's not like casey would have been the defending champion and the clear class of the field... partly due to injury, he ended up finishing in third in 2012. jorge and dani didn't win the 2013 title in part as a result of their own injuries, and who knows how casey would have fared... like sometimes it's just luck of the draw really. you can be the better rider and still not win the title, shit happens. I think for as long as a more or less healthy-ish casey stays in the sport, it would have been unlikely that marc establishes quite the same performance edge as he did over dani... but, well, if anything that would have meant he would have fought even harder out of perceived necessity to win the internal honda wars
it's the kind of thing that can make a relationship quickly deteriorate, especially with a prickly character such as casey, and it's entirely plausible that dynamic would have become strained at best and horrendously toxic at worst... sooner rather than later. and the thing is, this environment would affect marc considerably less than it would casey. again, it's the fact that he relishes the fight... he's very good at shrugging off (most) criticism and thrives in that kind of tension. the emotional fatigue that this scenario generates would be painfully lopsided, where casey offers harsh criticisms and means them and is endlessly frustrated with marc's approach, while marc... doesn't really care. at least dani also had a questionable manager who was conducting behind the scenes warfare on his behalf - casey doesn't want to play these games at all. he just wants to ride a bike, and marc is never going to allow him to live in peace as long as he's an internal threat. if casey were exposed directly to all of that from marc, I doubt he'd walk away from the experience with a particularly positive impression of him
does he walk away? I think there's a decent chance that casey would have ended up so disillusioned with the whole thing that this would have been what pushed him into retirement. if he wants to get out of that mess, let's say after two years, his options would have been pretty limited. yamaha is closed off and I'd struggle to think of a scenario in which either jorge or valentino would have been particularly interested in a direct swap (also, if you're sick of being marc's teammate, you're probably not gonna be jumping at the chance to be valentino's instead). I suppose you could go back to ducati (which he did return to as a test rider so it's not like those bridges were permanently burnt), and maybe casey could do something special even with *gestures* that version of the bike. really though... I think enough would have been enough for him. regardless of the actual balance of success between the pair of them, my guess is marc wins that war because he's happier to get nasty and because he wants it more. casey has his two to four titles... he's done. let him go fishing
#wow sorry i feel like this is a bit depressing? 'casey would retire at age 29 rather than 27' feels like a mean place to take this#maybe this is too cynical.... feel free to disagree. just personally really struggle to see anything other than disaster#i think it's a fun scenario but in all seriousness as someone who is like. generally invested in casey finding some peace in life#i'm quite glad he didn't have to go through it. good chance he gets another title but he left for a reason#'oh nice an ask i can answer quickly' i think to myself#and well i did write it quickly but i realise it's still. quite long#spec tag#babynflames#marc marquez#casey stoner#//#mm93#cs27#heretic tag#2013-15-ish vale/jorge love and peace era were already kinda looking over at the honda wars and going. what's all this then#batsplat responds#in this timeline i reckon they'd be even more pointedly cooperative. occasionally give a friendly thumbs up at the explosions next door#valentino a big believer in letting others do his dirty work for him so it'd be very [carefully neutral smile]#'EYE didn't think there was any problem with marc's move... maybe casey should consider not leaving a gap next time?' (there was no gap)#he does do that a littleeee with jorge but idk it felt less malicious... i think on a personal level he enjoyed riling casey up more#more genuine dislike for jorge imo but couldn't quite help himself with casey with the constant bickering... it's complicated#where would marc/casey have their first on-track incident? reckon cota would actually be a good shout - get it in nice and early#vibes of a good casey track but not marc cota levels good but marc's still a child... idk you need to get them in the same bit of track so#otherwise some time in the assen to brno stretch.... let's say *spins wheel* indianapolis#can u imagine if marc did the corkscrew move on CASEY... get rid of bradl (sorry dude) what does THAT podium look like what are the vibes
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savage-rhi · 2 months
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Magenta 😥
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crowlore · 11 months
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i remember it used to be a bit of a fandom pet peeve of mine that some people would forget that the gung ho guns and eye of michael were two separate groups with some membership overlap but then stampede came along and made the eom into a project of conrad’s backed by knives. another example of how the reboot feels like bad fanfiction.
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jrueships · 2 months
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guess whos not going in at all this week, actually
#MY MANAGER EMAILED LIKE 2 HOURS B4 I HAD TO GO IN#she finally changed my schedule (1 day) to the night shift today#(i emailed her to be safe just kinda casually reaffirming im going in at the new time & then asking if any other shifts wanted 2 be changed#bcs that sounds great to me whstever option she goes with#she ignored that question & i get a new email from her asking if i completed a training. lets called it DOC#basically a long time ago she said 'i will send you DOC instructions soon' .. a few days pass and i get three 50 paged packets#one is called NAVIGATING DOC#im like oh ok cool that must be the DOC training shes talking abt bcs the other 2 packets were abt various trainings#NAH BRUH. APPARENTLY THE DAY IM SUPPOSED TO GO IN. SHE MESSAGES ME SOME ENTIRELY ALIEN PROGRAM#and is like 'u completed this right? cus if u didnt u cant come in today.'#LIKE?? MAYBE I WOULDA IF U SENT THE SHIT#but it's also like. dam i shouldve emailed prompting her to send what she said she would n clarifying BUT FUCK#WHY DO I GOTTA?? IM NOT THE MANAGER#she literally told me the name of the program rn thru email so i type it in and see like four hour long modules to complete#mind u i aint never even been informed a WHISPER abt this new program. nothings even labeled DOC TRAINING#but my struggle is. was i notified this?? and i just didnt see??? was i supposed to clarify with her what the DOC training was exactly??#the only thing ive heard abt doc training b4 this is 'i need to send u DOC training soon' in EMAIL. so i expected an alert#abt THE DOC TRAINING... in an EMAIL notification. WHAT THE HELL IS THIS#idk man#i dont even care bro like im busy as hell & the work is just to build clinic hours so i dont care abt the money factor#it's just like. can we get this first day jitters thing over with already?? im so over this bro#yaddayadda i emailed her an apology n ill be on that ASAP shit. but i did let her know i am basically justnnow seeing this site#n if there was any email or notif that couldve/tried to inform me of its existence 2 pls let me know / figure out how to find it#so the issue doesnt occur again & i dont have to keep botherinher which im so srry of bcs med is stress n shes just trying to get by#but still bro im a lil miffed bcs she probably thinks im stupid now and now im wondering if i AM#bcs WDYM ONLINE MODULES. AINT NOBODY SAID SH IT EVEN ABT THE EXISTENCE OF THEM!!! i wouldve pressed harder 4 clarification#if i knew it was an ONLINE MODULE i had to look out for on some randomass site i didnt even know the name of until now#instead of the EMAIL UVE BEEN 'COMMUNICATING' WITH ME ON#ARREGHHHHHHHH IM NOT STUPID. I SWEAR IM NOT STUPID FUCCK MY BAKA LIFE
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phantajam · 1 month
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my hot take about descendants is that NONE of the core four were ready for a relationship until maybe like, the third movie (rant in tags)
#they were still adjusting to living life without struggling to survive#a girl should not be jumping into a relationship the same week she just tried her first piece of non-rotten food lol#thats not to say I don't like the canon ships#but mal married literally the FIRST man she met in auradon. at 18.#and even as far as in descendants 2 we see them still struggling to adjust in different ways (mainly mal)#in d3 they seem to have fully assimilated into life in Auradon (as much as a VK can anyway)#so it makes sense for them to THEN seek out relationships if that's what they want.#but disney ofc wanted to act like romantic love just automatically fixes a person's problems ig?? as if a relationship wouldn't just be#added stress given the position the VKs were in in d1#not to mention dating just like. wasnt a thing on the isle (mal even says this)#and I get that the kids are craving to be loved because their parents didn't gaf about them. But I wish the first movie focused more on the#finding that love in each other than romantically with outside people. a sort of “they had love in them all along” moment.#and then this fandom loves to argue about whether Jarlos/Janelos was 'rushed'. at least Carlos (and Jay +lonnie) waited a few months before#throwing themselves into the dating scene. Poor evie had her heart broken within like 3 days of being in Auradon. no wonder she was willing#to help steal the wand lol.#Anyway to wrap up this rant I didn't even mean to go on#I just think that kids who have spent the first 14-16 years of their lives fighting to survive and being put through continuous trauma on a#daily basis don't need dating right away. they need THERAPY.#if anyone here has seen stranger things its kinda an El and Mike situation were its like. the girl grew up in a lab and fell for the first#boy in regular society who was kinda nice to her lol. thats how I view Mal and Ben#same with doug and evie. he was nicer than chad but he still fell for her for her looks and she still fell for him because he was the first#guy in auradon to be genuinely interested in her. also evie had a whole “I dont need a prince” arc and ended up with a man anyway?#my problem with janelos was always that Carlos never quite worked out his mommy issues or his anxiety. I feel like he'd be afraid of hurtin#her even though that boy wouldn't hurt a fly. and we see Jane get pretty stressed out herself- have you ever been in a relationship where#both of you have anxiety? cause it either goes really well (you help keep each other calm) or REALLY terribly (you make each other spiral)#I actually really liked Lonnie and Jay (though I feel like it would've had a bigger payoff if she was in d3. not sure why she wasn't but I#wont dunk on that because it couldve been smth to do with her actress). I think Lonnie is someone who can 'handle' Jay well and match his#energy. And I like the idea of Jay finding someone he's loyal to after being commitment-phobic for 1 1/2 movies and the whole first book lo#and ofc I have to throw this in here: any auradon kid the VKs get with is never going to grasp even half of what they went through.#this doesnt mean they can't try to understand and be empathetic. but it will always cast a shadow on VK/AK relationships.
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I can't believe I'm still saying this 5 seasons in but. the way at LEAST half of all the disasters on desperate housewives would've been avoided if any one of these women had ever heard of abortion....
#i just dont get it#like ok i KINDA see how you can justify this being a plot point when the teen daughter of the superchristian housewive gets pregnant#(though it shouldve at least been a part of the discussion...)#but like. Lynette didnt even want her FIRST child#much less her... what is it now? 5th child??#or 5 and half i suppose if you half-count her husbands daughter with another woman#(who was shot right next to you and whose daughter you promised to care for right before she died)#(who you sent away to live with her grandparents because her acting out from her moms traumatic death was too much for you)#oh wait! no my bad#this will be lynette's 5.5ths AND 6.5ths (????) children because apparently shes having TWINS. AGAIN#like. lynette. you are in your mid to late 40s. youve raised 4 children and are finally getting your oldests out of the house#you only recently reentered the workforce#your husband is struggling so hard to get a job he decided to go back to college to learn mandarin to get a leg up in the industry???#LYNETTE. ABORTIONS WERE INVENTED FOR PEOPLE LIKE YOU!! I AM BEGGING!!#lynette if i beg hard enough will you hear me through the screen and 15 years time separating us#lynette. Can You Hear Me#do NOT#have these children#girl. listen to me. you are going to have to pay 8 college tuitions. and with WHAT savings???#your restaurant just TANKED you have NOTHING in the bank!!#count with me!#2 kids just heading into college + 2 younger kids who will be going to college (at least 1 no doubt getting a phd)#+ 1 kid you sent away but will still have to pay for#+ 1 husband who figures he'll go back to college cos he cant find a job#PLUS 2 more kids on the way???#= 8!! 8 tuitions!! a few are bound to go for grad degrees too! do you have ANYTHING tucked away for them??#lynette. kill them kids#Abort Those Embryos!!#now!!#desperate housewives lb
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poptartmochi · 10 months
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WAIT HEAD IN THE HANDS 🦅🦅
#augusta fetches a Very Pretty Dowry from the family she marries into + this is the Big reason her father weds her off so young#but. 🧍🏻‍♀️ i think another part of it is that her magic is genuinely stifled in their homeland. the cold is what killed her mom when she#first came there + augusta struggles with it too. there are some benefits to having draconic blood in the Dragoncursed Lands but overall#it's mostly cons 🍻😔 so it's a two for one deal. mister rustrian gets ???#a lot of money? some magical artefact that beats the fog back?? Something. and also his daughter gets to Leave and hone in her magic#so she can one day come back and put an end to the curse after all. easy peasy!#but then at the wedding he sees the necklace the family is going to regale her with + arcana checks that shit#and BAM.. it is the tf2 sapper in disguise! so he tries to call the wedding off because 😐 this was the Opposite of the point in marrying#her off tf!! but Augusta hates him and is lost in the sauce of being Free of Him + simultaneously lost in the sauce of being in touch#with her full mana pool for the first time in her life. so the rage kinda goes crazy and blam blam your father has been imploded.. magic#missile lvl 6 on his ass or something ridiculous#and the In-Laws are like ... 👁️👄👁️.. 👁️🫦👁️ leash this beast IMMEDIATELY we need her magic NOWWWWWW#and so began augusta's 20 years of possession in baldur's gate or whateva 😔🦅#i realized this Could Not Happen in waterdeep because. well. if raw and unbridled magic is what you were after gale and all of his#colleagues are Right There 🧍🏻‍♀️🧍🏻‍♀️🧍🏻‍♀️ ... she has to become baldurian and elturian or Something.. but on principle she Cannot be#waterdhavian 🦅 she should be from that one place that is trying to be like waterdeep but the one other city has claimed the local waterdeep#title so they just have to seethe abt it 😆#🦖
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larrythefloridaman · 2 years
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google :)
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love u goog <3
#to explain the dotted squares: Why Are You A Redhead When You Are Bing's Clone.#and the other is like. lets get one thing straight i love goog to death everything in season 2? wouldnt change a damn thing#but i feel like the susan thing was resolved too quickly. and his relationship with mac has gone. underaddressed.#goog was raised by dr. order and i love that he defects right away when shown a first glimmer of something more meaningful#it works well to demonstrate the point that kindness is what we're. as people. most naturally drawn to when circumstance allows for it#but i think how easy it ultimately comes to him even when that's challenged by his personal hurt later kinda. cheapens it a bit?#kindness is easy but its also very hard sometimes when we are faced with the desire or need to protect ourselves from being hurt#and susan letting goog get his catharsis from attacking her even though it wasnt Her her that hurt him#is something i feel should've left him feeling a bit more. conflicted a bit longer. the resolution was sweet but not fully earned imo?#and then theres mac. your little brother almost kills you in cold blood chasing the same meaningless victory you were raised to achieve#and then just. befriends your platonic partner's little sister and becomes part of the family while changing very little of his outlook#just changing who he answers to because he got his ass kicked. and you're just supposed to feel fucking NORMAL about that???????#idk just think google should get to bite people and be dysfunctional a little more he was raised by doctor order hes not even two years old#he's a shonen protagonist with anxiety but the anxiety doesn't even really interfere meaningfully with anything narratively best i remember#machi has the excuse of being baby to explain why he's so innocent and even he's distinctly self-centered at times#google is a grown man and chooses kindness every day after he got out of there#and that rules. but id like to see him struggle with it just a LIL more#a bit too much of a perfect victim after he gets out for my taste. i had a similar problem with adora in she-ra#lots of not having a frame of reference for a different normal than theirs but always choosing the Right™ thing to do the first time anyway#but thats a mild 'show dont tell'-y writing gripe#its been a good bit since i watched the eps referenced so my feelings might change when i get to them in my rewatch#i simply think meeting a version of your shitty mom that's largely the same but not shitty should make you feel. a lot of different ways#and we didnt really get to see goog wrestle with that after finding out susan wasnt Really her and i think thats kind of a shame#and i dont remember if mac and goog have even shared any screentime after that time Mac Injured Him Terribly with plus ultra
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Striking reading Embassytown immediately after Don Quixote because whilst you wouldn't usually compare sci-fi (published 2011) to a parody of the chivalric romance genre (final part published 1615) they are nevertheless strikingly similar
#like embassytown is about language: who controls communication; truth vs lies vs metaphors vs similes; what if there were no such thing as a#Concept You Had No Words For (Yet) what if you could only experience what you said#don quixote is about a guy who's a bit cringe and gets beaten up a lot#but they are also both about stories and communication#don quixote goes on his adventures because he reads too much and thinks them real - the narrator frequently refers to The True And Real#History of Don Quixote even though what we're reading is no more real than what he read and believed to be true#embassytown's plot hinges on lies but also I think the question How can we communicate across the vast differences between us#and even as the characters begin to lie so does the narrator (or at least finds herself struggling to tell the truth)#Cervantes - through Cide Hamete Benengeli - complains at the start of part 2 at how someone took his story away from him; wrote a second pa#Embassytown's narrator 'admit[s] defeat. [...] Perhaps because I didn't pay proper attention perhaps because it wasn't a narrative but for#whatever reasons it doesn't want to be what I want to make it'#Benegali tells us 'no [story]* can be bad so long as it is true' Avice says 'This is a true story I'm telling but I am telling it and that#entails certain things'#Do You Kinda See My Point. it's about how we tell stories to each other and how we communicate the non-real#*many translators translate 'historia' as 'history'. discuss amongst yourselves what impact that makes vs its other meaning of 'story'#I don't actually know how much sense I'm making; I'm tired and I'm just rambling in the tags#but like it's cool
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imaginedisish · 2 months
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Lover, You Should've Come Over (Logan Howlett x Fem!Reader)
A/N: Get ready to cry. This is based on a request I received yesterday where the reader gets jealous of Jean. I tried to take this in a different direction just because I feel like this is a popular trope that has been done by many fantastic writers. It's also inspired by "Lover, You Should've Come Over," by Jeff Buckley. Hope you guys enjoy.
Summary: You've been pining after Logan since you joined the X-Men, and you're convinced he'll never love you back. He’s obsessed with Jean—always has been. Or...maybe he's not.
Warnings: SMUT 18+ MINORS DNI, Oral (f!receiving), fingering, PIV (unprotected...pls WRAP IT UP THIS IS FICTION!), overstimulation, multiple orgasms, f!reader/afab!reader, telepathic!reader, cocky!Logan, softdom!Logan (kinda? yeah.), non-canon compliant (you'll see what I mean...no spoilers), cursing, angst, feelings, implied mutant trauma (kinda a given in X-Men), probably some grammatical errors, I think that's it.
Word Count: 4,197 sorry
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Wanting someone you can’t have—it’s that crying in the shower, pulling your legs into your chest, screaming into your pillow kind of heartache. You’ve come to know the feeling intimately. It’s an awful, horrid, stomach-churning kind of pain.
But you want him. Despite all the pain, you want him. Logan Howlett. You can’t seem to keep him off your mind. For the few months you’ve been one of the X-Men, Logan has been a constant. He’s always there—whether it’s to train or just to talk. But you know he’ll never want you. You see the way he looks at Jean. You wish you didn’t. You wish you were oblivious to that sort of thing. But you don’t need to use your telepathy to reach inside his mind for proof—you just know. 
You keep holding on, savoring every moment, every interaction you have with Logan. You sit on the lawn of the mansion with him, watching the sunset. You’ll come down to the living room late at night to find him sitting in front of the T.V. and join him. Sometimes he’ll drape an arm around your shoulder. He’ll draw circles into your side as you drift off. You’ll wake up the next morning back in your bed, Logan having carried you there long after you’ve fallen asleep. 
You’ve decided you’ll take all he’ll give you, even if it means nothing to him—even if it's platonic. 
But tonight, you wish something would come up through the floor and swallow you whole. A void, a black hole maybe. That would do the trick. Disappearing would make everything so much easier. The second-best thing to disappearing is sitting in the kitchen of the mansion, alone, with a pint of ice cream. You decide to practice your powers, moving the silver spoon with your mind, concentrating as you dig the spoon into the top of the pint and into your mouth. 
You hear a warm, familiar chuckle from the doorway as the spoon lands on your tongue. You look up, and there’s Logan, arms tucked across his chest. “Wish I could do that.”
You can’t help but smile around the spoon as he strides over to you, taking a seat on the stool next to yours. You slide the spoon out of your mouth and rest it on the napkin next to the ice cream. “Hey,” you mutter, wiping your mouth with the back of your hand. 
His shoulder brushes against yours. He’s so close it hurts. You try to shove the pain down and enjoy the moment. 
“Was hoping I’d run into you down here. Thought maybe you’d be in bed already,” Logan says, his eyes locked on yours. 
You shake your head, doing your best to keep that fake smile plastered on your face. “Couldn’t sleep.” 
You can see the sudden concern appear on his face. “Everything okay?” He asks, tilting his head to the side. Fuck, you think to yourself. Maybe he’s catching on. 
“Yeah,” you murmur, looking down at the ice cream. “Just still having a hard time adjusting.” It wasn’t a lie. You had always struggled with your powers, longing to hide, to shove them down. Your whole life, you were either a freak or something to be used—whatever was most convenient in the moment. The struggle between visibility and forcing yourself to be “normal” was an impossible battle. You were no stranger to being taken advantage of or being experimented on.
Logan was the first person who understood that—understood you. He made you feel seen in a way that no one ever had. It’s part of the reason you’ve fallen so hard for him. 
His hand is suddenly on your back, yanking you from your thoughts and back to reality. “I’m here,” he whispers. “Whatever you need, anything.” 
Anything. You wish he really meant it. 
“Thanks, Lo.” You smile up at him, letting your eyes linger on his lips for just a second before looking back down at the ice cream. “Want some?” You ask, nodding at the pint. 
“Only if you feed it to me the way you did when I walked in.” You can hear the smirk in his voice as he taps the spoon. You side-eye him incredulously. “I mean it. Wanna see you do it again.” There’s a husk in his voice, a shift in his timber that sends a chill down your spine. You try not to think about it too much as you pick up the spoon with your mind. 
You guide the spoon inside the pint, scraping the top, and lifting it up towards Logan’s mouth. He opens wide as you lead the spoon inside, his tongue hitting the bottom as his lips close around it. The implications of the moment don’t dawn on you until he’s grabbing the spoon with his hands and sucking on the metal. There’s something undeniably suggestive about this. 
Heat rises to your chest as you replay the image of him taking the spoon into his mouth in your mind. It’s so intimate, so domestic. And, certainly, something else—something that makes you tick, that makes that familiar fire grow deep within your belly. 
But—like always—the moment doesn’t last long. You wince, feeling someone itching against your thoughts, prodding at your mental shields, begging to be let in. Suddenly, there’s another voice in your mind. 
I gotta try that myself. You flinch at the sound, taking the spoon from Logan’s hand and shooting it across the room to where you sense the person’s presence. You turn around, and there’s Jean, resisting the spoon’s trajectory with her mind. 
It's almost pressing into her skull, shaking in mid-air, ready to break her skin. You gasp and drop the spoon, embarrassed to have registered her as a threat. “I’m so sorry,” you say, watching as Jean crouches down and picks up the spoon. “I didn’t know that was you in there, I swear.”
You expect Logan to stand from the chair and rush over to Jean, but he stays next to you, glued to your side, the palm of his hand resting gently on your back. “Jean.” His voice is firm, almost cold and harsh. “What was that?” You’re surprised at how curt he’s being with her, surprised he remembered that you’re sensitive to people probing around your mind, even if it’s friendly. 
Jean mutters a curse. “I was just communicating with her. I didn’t think she’d—” 
Logan stands, his hand still steady at your back. “Don’t do that again. Ever.” His voice is louder now, heavier. 
She whispers an apology, setting the spoon on the counter and walking towards the doorway. “I really didn’t mean to hurt you,” she says. “I should’ve remembered given your…” she pauses, searching for the word, “past…that it wouldn’t be a good idea.” She takes another tentative step. “I’ll leave you two alone,” she says, and she slips out. 
Logan settles back into the stool next to you. You’re shocked that he’s still here, that he hasn’t run away yet. You can hear him breathe—in and out—gentle, long breaths. You close your eyes and listen, the sound calming you down. You’re still expecting him to leave, to walk away, but he doesn’t. 
“You okay?” He asks, your eyes fluttering open, his voice hanging in the air. His head is tilted to the side, worry painted across his face. 
“Y-yeah. I’m fine,” you stutter, your voice cracking. “You don’t have to stay with me. You can go check on her if you want.” You nod towards the doorway—to wherever Jean wandered off to. 
“And why would I do that?” Is all he says in return, furrowing his brows. 
You put on that fake smile again. “I almost jammed a spoon into her forehead because she spoke to me telepathically.” You shake your head. “Don’t really think my reaction was particularly friendly—or something that good people do.” You break eye contact with Logan and look to the other side of the kitchen. “Plus, you two are…close.”
“Hey.” His voice is firm again, but gentle this time, reassuring. His hand slips across your back and rests on your waist. You’re so shocked by the contact that you almost miss what he says. “First of all, she knows better. Charles warned her about what you’ve been through. And second…” He trails off, smirking at you. “I’d rather be with you.”
Oh? Oh. He’d rather be with you. 
“I just thought, you know, you and Jean were…” You’re too embarrassed to finish the sentence and too nervous to hear him say the words you’ve been dreading most. 
He shakes his head, that smirk still spread across his lips. “No, it’s not Jean I want. Never has been.” 
Your breathing becomes shaky—your heart beating rapidly in your chest. “If it’s not Jean, then—” 
Logan cuts you off as he suddenly moves. His arm lifts from your waist as he stands, turning your stool around so your back is against the cold countertop. He’s gripping the arms of the stool now, caging you in. Your mind is hazy—you can’t concentrate with him this close. 
“You think I do the shit I do with you with Jean too, hm?” He’s towering over you, his head cocking to the side, his voice self-assured and confident. “Think I’m watching movies and sunsets with her? Carrying her to bed, too?” 
You’re overwhelmed, dizzied by his words, his size, him. “Just thought that—”
“Just thought what?” He cuts you off again. “That I didn’t want you, darlin’?” He brings his lips to the shell of your ear, one hand moving from the counter to your hip. “Wanted you this whole time,” he huffs, goosebumps rising on your arms. “Only you.” He presses a kiss to your ear, and then just underneath your jaw. 
“Logan,” you whisper. “W-want you too,” you choke out, your hands coming up and around his back. “B-but someone’s gonna walk in on us.” 
He’s ignoring you, biting your pulse point lightly and licking the pain away. “Let them,” he husks, refusing to stop. You instinctively bring your hands up to the nape of his neck, your nails digging in slightly. He groans at the contact, his chest heaving against yours. 
“One of the kids is catch us in here, or somebody else,” you mutter, his face still buried in the crook of your neck. “W-we should—”
“Go to my room.” He finishes your thought. 
“Please.” 
And then he’s picking you up from the chair, his hands under your thighs, grabbing your ass. You wrap your legs around his waist as he prowls out of the kitchen. He looks both ways as he crosses the hallway and makes his way to the stairs. There’s no one in sight. He carries you up the steps and down the hall to his room, practically breaking down the door as he swings it open and slams it shut. 
And then he’s laying you down on his bed, crawling over you, pressing his forehead against yours. “Wanted you in here sooner,” he murmurs, his lips just inches from yours. “Hoped you’d come over one night. You should’ve.”
His lips crash down onto yours before you can find the words to say. He’s starving for you, swallowing your moans as his hands slip under your shirt, his nails digging lightly into your sides. “So fucking beautiful,” he rasps against your lips. Everything is desperate and rushed, hands pawing at bare skin in the dim light of his room. 
Logan tugs on the hem of your shirt, rolling it up your body and over your head. He tosses it to the side as he sits up on his knees, taking you in. He curses under his breath, looking you up and down. 
“Logan,” you whine, arching your back. You need his hands on you again, his lips. Something. Anything. 
“I know, pretty girl,” he soothes, his fingers hooking inside the waistband of your shorts. “Gonna take care of you.” He yanks them down your legs, leaving you in just your bra and panties. 
He pulls off his own shirt, tossing it carelessly, letting it get lost on the floor. He settles back down over you, balancing on his forearm as his free hand finds your waist. He slides up to the bottom of your bra, teasingly pulling on the fabric before slipping his hand behind your back—skillfully unclasping the bra with one easy motion. You arch your back again, the bra straps sliding down your arms as Logan tosses the bra to the floor, too. 
“Fuck,” he mumbles, his hand tracing the curves of your breasts, massaging gently. “Perfect.” He captures your lips in another kiss as his thumb ghosts over your nipples, just barely giving you the relief you need before pinching softly. The pressure feels so good, so right, but it’s not enough. 
He draws circles around your nipples with his thumb, the sensation feeding the aching fire between your legs. Your hips involuntarily lift off the mattress, meeting his. “Need me that bad, huh?” He is always so incredibly cocky, even now—especially now. He knows exactly what he’s doing to you, and what to do next. 
Logan grinds his erection into your core. You can feel how big he is, the weight of him heavy against your cunt even in his jeans. You clench around nothing, whining his name as his strained cock teases your panty-clad pussy. “You want me to make you feel good, pretty girl?”
“Y-yes,” you stutter, biting your lips as his hand leaves your tits and sweeps down your stomach, stopping just above your clit. He slides his fingers down just a bit more, feeling where your arousal seeps through your panties. 
“Already soaking for me, sweetheart.” The bassy timber of his voice stokes that flame deep within your belly. Without warning, he’s hooking his fingers into the waistband of your panties and yanking them down your legs. “Can’t wait anymore, pretty girl,” he whispers. “Wanna taste this pussy.” He kisses your belly button, leaving a trail down the rest of your stomach as his mouth travels to where you need him most. 
There’s something depraved about the way he’s crawling down your body, taking in every inch of you. He spreads your legs apart with the palms of his hands—his thumbs brushing against your bare skin, licking teasingly at your inner thighs as he settles in between them. 
He pauses, looking at you under hooded eyes. You can see the want—no, the need—in the way his muscles flex and how he works his jaw. But he’s hesitating, his breath hot against your core, sending another jolt of desire through your body. Your chest rises and falls rapidly, your eyes searching his for his next move. 
He finally presses a kiss to your clit. “You don’t understand how you make me feel,” he mumbles against your heat, licking a long stripe through your folds and back to your clit. “No idea how long I’ve fucking wanted you.” You throw your head back, whimpering his name as he laps again and again. He’s starving, and you’re the only thing that can satiate his hunger. His tongue swirls around your clit, flicking it, taking it in between his lips and sucking hard. 
Your hips lift off the mattress and Logan quickly moves to hold them down. “You’re not going anywhere, darlin’,” he grunts against you, the vibration of his voice going straight to your core. 
His free hand slips up the inside of your thighs, teasingly climbing higher and higher, his nails skimming your flesh. He’s toying with you, leading you on, taking his time. His fingers finally ghost over your folds, exploring you, stroking up and down as his tongue laps at your cunt. 
Logan prods your entrance with two fingers, slipping in just a bit, testing the waters. “Please,” you beg, pushing your hips down in an attempt to sink his fingers deeper into you. He stops you, his hand still firmly holding your hips down, refusing to give you the release you’re dying for. 
“So fucking impatient, aren’t you?” He tuts. And then he’s shoving two fingers all the way inside you, down to his knuckles. “Such a pretty pussy.”
“F-fuck!” You cry out, your eyes rolling into the back of your head as he sets a relentless pace. He’s drinking you in, sucking roughly, his long fingers pumping in and out with a vengeance. 
“’This what you wanted, pretty girl?” He asks condescendingly in between laps. You’re too fucked out to form a sentence, your legs trembling underneath him. You know he’s loving this—loving that you’re a wet, needy, whimpering mess. 
Your walls squeeze around his fingers, your swollen clit throbbing as he laps at you. You’re so close already. “Lo,” you call out, fisting the sheets of his bed. Everything in here smells like him: pine and mint and musk and tobacco and that thing that’s uniquely Logan. It’s all so overwhelming and overstimulating. You’re ready to fall apart, to melt into nothingness. “S-so close.”
He squeezes your hip. “I know, sweetheart,” he soothes, his pace unwavering as his fingers fuck into you, scissoring inside you, drawing you closer to your climax with that come-hither motion he does so well. Your walls flutter again. “That’s it,” he coos. “Wanna feel you come—wanna know what it tastes like.” He licks harder, faster. “Let go for me, darlin’.” 
He pushes you over the edge, pleasure warming your belly as you let go. It washes over you in waves, his fingers still pumping in and out, his tongue still hanging on to the taste of you. You ride it out, his thumb brushing your hip, coaxing you through it. His fingers slip out of your cunt, but his head is still buried between your legs. You shudder as he licks long, slow stripes through your folds. 
“So fucking sweet,” he growls, still starving for more. “Not done with you yet.”
Fuck. 
But you need more—need his cock deep inside you, pounding into you. You need him in front of you, his lips on yours. 
“Logan,” you whine, your voice shaky and trembling just like the rest of your body. He finally lifts his head, his hair a disheveled mess, your juices glistening on his lips and his chin. The sight of him makes your breath hitch in your throat. There’s a feral, needy look in his eyes. He’s starving for more of you, and you’re not quite sure he’ll ever get enough. 
But he can see your chest heaving and the desire in your own eyes. He knows what you need—he always does. He sits up on his knees, staring at you while he slowly unbuckles his belt. The tension is palpable, the clinking of his belt against the hardwood floors cutting through it like a hot knife—the only sounds the melding of your quick breaths and the shuffling of bed sheets as Logan finally comes up to meet you. 
He's balancing on his forearm as he unbuttons his jeans, undoing the zipper and shoving the denim and his boxers down his legs. You swallow at the sight of his cock springing against his stomach. You had felt his erection before, but he is far bigger than you ever anticipated. 
With one hand on his cock, he lowers himself in between your thighs. You instinctually spread your legs for him, inviting him in. He nudges against your entrance, taking his time. 
His forehead meets yours, your chests flush against each other’s, panting in sync. You’re both waiting with bated breath, his tip slipping inside, but stopping short before going any farther. 
His Adam’s apple bobs in his throat. “Thought I’d never have you,” he confesses, pushing his tip a bit further in. “Would’ve given up anything for this. Would’ve waited forever.”
“You don’t have to,” you murmur.  “I’m right here. I’m yours.” 
“Mine?”
“All yours.”
And then he’s pushing deep inside you, down to the hilt, bottoming out. He swallows your moans with a kiss, biting your lip, drawing blood, and licking it away. “All fucking mine.” He stays buried inside you, unmoving. “Wanna stay inside you forever, sweetheart,” he growls, your heart bursting at the thought.
He pulls himself all the way out and all the way back in, stretching you out, working you open. You look down in between your bodies and watch as his cock disappears inside of you. “Feels s-so fucking good,” you stammer, already drunk off him. 
“Like watching me fuck into you?” Logan husks, picking up his pace, his hips snapping into yours. 
“Y-yes,” you whimper. His muscles flex as he ruts into you. He takes the hand that was on his cock and brings it in between your bodies, his fingertips quickly finding your clit and giving it a soft pinch. Your back arches off the mattress at the sensation. 
Logan hums at your reaction. “So sensitive,” he groans. “Taking me so good, sweetheart.” You can feel him losing control as he rams into you, his thrusts growing harder with each pump of his cock. He’s drawing firm, fast circles into your core. 
It’s all too much, him, his cock, his fingers. Your skin is on fire, your nipples pushing against his chest—the friction absolutely delicious. You’re already so close, just a few steps away from the ledge, and you’re ready to fall. 
“Know you’re close, darlin’,” Logan moans in between kisses. “Can feel you squeezing me.” 
You hum in response, but Logan refuses to let up. His pace is beyond brutal, pounding into you over and over again, his fingers working your clit in tandem. Your muscles contract around him, gripping tightly. 
“That’s it,” he murmurs. “So fucking tight, so fucking warm.” His praises are more than you can handle. “You gonna come on my cock, just like this?” 
“Yes, fuck, Logan!” You’re a babbling mess, his name the only thing on your mind, on your lips, hanging in the air like it’s a sacred prayer. Everything is him, and it always has been. In this moment and in every other, he is your end and your beginning. 
 “Let go for me, sweetheart. Know you can do it for me.” His deep voice is all you need to walk you through it. You’re breaking down, coming on his cock, the pleasure coursing through your veins, spreading like an untamable fire. 
He’s stroking your clit long after you’ve come, still snapping his hips into yours, still working up towards his own orgasm. His pace is getting sloppier, but he shows no signs of stopping. You can feel yourself growing overstimulated, his cock rubbing against your walls, his fingers circling your clit. “S’too much,” you whine, your nails digging into his arms, your legs wrapping around his waist. 
Logan presses himself closer to you, as close as he possibly can be. “You’ve got one more in you, sweetheart,” he coaxes, not letting up. “Know you can take it.”
You’re breathless, clinging onto him helplessly. You’re clamping down on him again, taking him deeper than you did before. He’s hitting that sweet spot with every thrust. “Lo,” you whimper. “I’m gonna—”
“I know, darlin’,” he grunts. You can feel him throbbing inside you. “Let it happen, I’ve got you. I’m not going anywhere.” 
The tension is snapping again, breaking in half as he pulls another orgasm from you. You shudder as you come for a third time, overstimulated and beyond fucked out. You know he’s close behind, his hips slowing down, his forehead pressed against yours. He slips his hand away from your clit and around your back, pulling you closer to his chest. It’s so intimate, so perfect. 
“F-fuck,” he mumbles. “Where do you want me to—”
You hold him closer. “Stay,” you whisper. “Want you inside. Wanna feel you come.”
“Oh fuck,” he mutters, plunging deep inside you, his muscles tensing as he fills you up, your name on his lips. His thrusts slow, pumping in and out every now and then before finally stopping. 
You stay like this for a few minutes, his arm keeping you tight against his chest, his cock still buried inside you and your foreheads still pressed together. 
He brings a hand up to your cheek, his thumb brushing gently across your skin. You sigh, your eyes fluttering open and closed. 
He shakes his head. “I always wanted you,” he says, his voice low and raspy. “The whole time. It was only ever you.” 
His words could make you cry. It’s everything you’ve ever hoped to hear. You smile, his hand finding its way to the crook of your neck, his fingers lightly stroking your sensitive skin. “Can’t believe I didn’t see it,” you breathe, your voice laden with sleepiness. “I never knew. Thought you’d never want me.”
“I’ll always want you.” His cock finally slips out of you, leaving you feeling empty. His legs tangle with yours, his lips pressing a chaste kiss to your temple. “Would’ve waited forever for you, darlin’.”
“Forever?”
“Longer.”
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