#This is his experience with her and she deserves to be acknowledged as the hero she is

[angy-grrr]

spoilers for chapter 429

idk if you guys remember but ochako does have parallels with All Might, specifically as the side who saves. It’s not that he feels the same for them both or something like that, they serve to represent the type of heroism he naturally goes to; his friend is not his love interest, from his perspective she’s out there having a crisis over not being able to save her, and Izuku reminds her that she is a hero bc she is his hero -she saved him multiple times, and she should be able to feel like a proper hero.

This conversation is not about the nature of their relationship, is about heroism; Izuku relates to a conflict between being a hero who saves and failing to save someone, and doesn’t want to see Ochako ending spiraling because she couldn’t also fulfill that role as expected. She’s his hero not because he loves her romantically -he’s a nerd I’m sure he would be way more nervous and blushing if he was confessing anything he thought was romantic- but because she’s able to go and do what All Might does to Izuku, save him physically and emotionally.

He knows she hides her feelings in order to not be a burden, yet he doesn’t talk about his own feelings outside of his guilt in heroics -what does he feel about losing OFA? About his own failures? About the people he personally lost? He can’t talk for others and claim Ochako is everyone’s hero, but he can speak for himself, and that’s his personal perspective -she is a hero to him, she’s his hero. And then the class appears to make sure she’s able to get support and understand she’s not alone, and she’s important to them too.

but Izuku doesn’t get support. Izuku cries a little and talks a little about himself, but he doesn’t get supported. If this was meant to be romantic, I don’t understand why he would hold back what’s inside of him.

the end of the chapter reveals that boy is going to be helped by that woman who regretfully ignored Tenko, and they both witness it and are happy about it while hearing izuku inspired that change, and iida wonders what’s up with them -this is the conclusion to their relationship. In their hearts these two are saviors who struggle to be heroes who save others, and they are happy there are appearing more people who want to be heroes like them. Heroes who save. Save like All Might.

That grandma for example, interpreting the narrative as what I think is intended, would be that boy’s All Might; she’s his hero.

Izuku and Ochako are heroes who save, and Deku is here to remind her at least she did save him many times, that she is still a hero because she is his hero. I don’t believe is meant to be interpreted as romantic, not that Izuku sees that phrase as it neither -after all, he said he does want to be like All Might and feels good to imitate him, but he doesn’t love him.

Ochako’s All Might hair moment, the parallels with Toshinori telling him he can be a hero, the trying to save from black suffocating quirks, the we can do it and do your best…

Do I need to remind you heroes arent a romantic thing for Izuku Midoriya?

[darkfluffydragon]

CRK Character Analysis and Theory: Hollyberry Cookie

Hollyberry is so, painfully overlooked. And I think it's almost by design, really. She's a cheerful, strong-willed character who's never really seen to have been really upset, other than when the truth about White Lily was revealed. Sure, there were subtle signs of her struggle, but never anything that really stuck or was obvious enough that 'it seemed important'. This led to the fandom joking around about her traumas, dismissing what she experienced and acknowledging all the Ancient's hardships, except for hers. She became the joke of the group, the "Except Hollyberry" meme.

And yeah, it's funny when looked at in a quick, general view. It's also sort of...not fair on her. She suffered the same as the other ancients, just because she doesn't scream "I'M TRAUMITISED HELP ME", it doesn't mean that she doesn't have problems.

She may not be like Pure Vanilla, who lost his entire kingdom. She may not be like Golden Cheese, who returned to everyone she loved being dead. She may not be like Dark Cacao whose son tried to kill him, or like White Lily who has to experience the maddening guilt of the consequences of her own actions, but that doesn't mean that what she does experiences should just be dismissed because they're seen as "not as drastic as the others".

Hollyberry has always been shown to be a very family and relationship-orientated person. She cares for them a lot, and visibly cherishes her relationships with all her friends and family. It is her shame of being incapable of protecting them that made her flee, she deemed herself unworthy of being able to protect them. or calling herself not just her family's protector, but her kingdom's protector. This happened after she watched Pure Vanilla basically sacrifice himself to save them and the rest of Earthbread from Dark Enchantress, which she didn't. couldn't do anything to help. And she had been gone for so long, that the Hollyberry Kingdom had to start a contest to try and find a new heir. That entire time, did Hollyberry blame herself for "her failures? For the entirety of however long the period between the Dark Flour Wars was, to the present day?

Eventually, though, she does come back. She comes back and saves her kingdom from Pitaya again, so all is well. Right? Except not really? I've already mentioned that she's a family-oriented person. She defeated Pitaya with the help of Princess Cookie (and Knight Cookie), Princess Cookie who she basically missed her entire childhood of. She never got to see Princess Cookie grow up. The family lost Tiger Lily Cookie while she was gone, and she couldn't do anything. Because she wasn't there. Once again, she has failed them.

She's the Queen Mother again, she's come back and is the hero again with the shield and she defeated Pitaya Cookie once again. She got everything back, without getting any consequences from her disappearance. Pitaya returned because she had abandoned her kingdom. She's the 'hero again' and 'got her shield back again' because she threw them away in the first place. They lost Tiger Lily Cookie and they still haven't found her granddaughter, yet somehow the kingdom sees fit to call her the Queen Mother.

She may have all of this, but does Hollyberry actually think she deserves all of this? Is this not all stuff she would feel she should blame herself for? That she should feel guilt and shame for? Hollyberry has gotten her status back, but she hasn't gotten back the one thing that she cherishes the most. That is the close relationship she had with her family, because of just how long she's been gone. Like, during their reunion? Royalberry personally regarded Hollyberry only one time. The first time he'd seen his mother in who knows how long, and it was him questioning if it really was her or not. Almost like they're just...close strangers. To me, it didn't seem like a familial relationship or a reunion. Probably because that entire part was mostly focused on them talking to Princess, with Hollyberry in the background despite showing up finally for the first time in forever!

Despite the episode being about her, it felt like she didn't belong.

Moving on from the alienation within her own family, I think her drinking problem is really, really overlooked. Seriously, her fondness for drinking is one of her most notable character traits, often portrayed as a part of her hearty and celebratory nature. But there's a fine line between enjoying the drinks in moderation and using it as a coping mechanism. She drinks so much, that Wildberry Cookie is asked to watch over her and monitor her (presumably by Jungleberry as stated in the Legend of the Red Dragon storyline. Also, the fact that a third party has to be the one to ask, and be concerned about her drinking habits??? That it wasn't even her own son, that it was her son's wife. That Jungleberry decided to help, intervene not through confrontation, but indirectly through someone else.)

She drank so much, she literally had a goblet that would never run out of berry juice!

("Hollyberry Cookie's Never-drying Goblet: A goblet that is always filled with berry juice, full-bodied and fragrant. It gets refilled the very next instant one takes their sip, hence the "never-drying.")

Hollyberry drinks so much, in the past and now, that even her friends and the people who know her dismiss her actions and go as far as to even just assume that what she does in her free time, is drink berry juice.

Hollyberry's frequent indulgence could be seen as a means of numbing the emotional pain she feels, particularly in response to her failures and feelings of inadequacy. Her idealisation as a hero, protector, and "Queen Mother" might place immense pressure on her to appear unbreakable, pushing her to hide her vulnerabilities behind her jovial personality and a tankard of berry juice.

It's confirmed that when adventuring, she used to take on an alias name. Take on a different identity, hiding who she is as Hollyberry (the legendary hero, the ancient cookie, the queen of a kingdom), to simply be Sweet Pinkberry Cookie. This felt the need to use another name when travelling, Tarte Tartin Cookie knew her as Sweet Pinkberry Cookie, and the Dragon City knew her as Sweet Pinkberry Cookie, she specifically instructed Wildberry to keep her true name a secret and to call her by her alias while within the city. This could have been a method she used to have used to escape her duties and expectations as "Hollyberry Cookie", which had been tied to her name. Her responsibilities definitely weigh down on her, and it seems like her method of dealing with them is to run away. Whether it is through drinks, or through physically hiding who she is and leaving for an adventure. This is ironic, considering her CRK skill is quite literally her charging forward with her shield.

It is through obligation, and her will to protect those she cares about, like Princess and Knight during the Hollyberry Palace story, that she stands strong and firm as a shield. That's what she's passionate about.

Hollyberry’s coping mechanisms are more subtle but no less significant. Her drinking, cheerful facade, and detached family life all suggest an internal struggle that is often dismissed due to her strong appearance. Her trauma is less about obvious scars and more about the quieter toll of endless battles, unspoken regrets, and the pressure to remain a symbol of strength.

The way Hollyberry is perceived reflects a common issue in storytelling: characters who don’t display their trauma in overtly painful ways can be seen as having “less” to deal with. However, Hollyberry’s struggles with alienation and possibly self-medicating behaviour reveal a more subtle picture of a hero who, despite her laughter and strength, is quietly weighed down by the guilt she feels.

Now, into more...theorising territory. Specifically, how I think Eternal Sugar's story will go.

Hollyberry's drinking and avoidance are not just coping mechanisms; they also tie into the theme of sloth in a...nuanced way. Sloth is traditionally understood as laziness or a reluctance to act (WHICH CAN BE SEE IN THE HOLLYBERRY PALACE STORY), which can also manifest as emotional avoidance and a failure to confront difficult truths (GET OUT OF HER PURE VANILLA THIS AIN'T ABOUT YOU still love you though <3). For Hollyberry, her drinking and retreat from her responsibilities reflect a deeper avoidance of her guilt and emotional turmoils. Rather than addressing the pain of failing to protect her family and friends, she withdraws from it, numbing herself with berry juice and pretending that everything is alright.

She seeks solace in alcohol, allowing herself to temporarily escape the weight of her responsibilities. While drinking may seem harmless on the surface, it represents the passive avoidance of the emotional work needed to heal and make amends. This is where sloth comes into play. It is not the lack of physical activity or courage since Hollyberry is brave and strong, but rather a reluctance to face uncomfortable emotions.

Her drinking can also be seen as a way of slipping into complacency, allowing herself to remain stuck in a cycle of self-pity and guilt, rather than taking active steps to repair the damage done to her family relationships. The choice to rely on alcohol becomes an act of sloth, where it's easier to drown her sorrows and pretend they don't exist than confront them.

Each trial the Ancients had gone through so far had been related to the Beasts and their previous virtues. Pure Vanilla learnt Knowledge about the witches, about the beasts, about White Lily, and had to face a cruel mental quiz by Shadow Milk. Dark Cacao had a battle of will as he travelled up a seemingly endless journey, and had to keep his resolution as he watched all the people he cherishes fade into flour. While for Golden Cheese, it isn't clear yet what it is her trial will be, there has been quite a literal sense of destruction for her (cough cough 🍗 cough cough), and with her hiding the Soulcheese and all she cares about in a vault to avoid having them be destroyed in the following battle against Burning Spice Cookie). It would be safe to assume that the trial Hollyberry would have to go through would be emotional by nature as well, which conveniently fits the issues currently being discussed.

The theme of sloth in her character arc highlights how emotional avoidance can lead to great suffering, not just for herself but for those around her. By choosing not to face her pain, Hollyberry leaves her family to suffer the consequences of her absence, most notably the loss of Tiger Lily Cookie. Her Sloth is not just about failing to act physically, but about failing to engage with her emotional responsibilities. She allowed her guilt to paralyze her, keeping her from returning to her family and from offering the protection and love she knew they needed. Though this has been resolved, the emotional difficulties haven't, and rather, they've all been glossed over.

I believe that Eternal Sugar will use this against her, as her virtue is Happiness. In relation to sloth, happiness can sometimes be a way to avoid dealing with difficult emotions or responsibilities. Rather than actively pursuing genuine fulfilment, one might settle for a superficial, temporary happiness that prevents them from engaging with deeper, more challenging aspects of their life. This type of happiness can be slothful, as it involves choosing the path of least resistance, avoiding discomfort or personal growth. This fits in perfectly with Hollyberry's use of alcohol, avoidance, and happy attitude,

For Hollyberry, real happiness would come from reconnecting with her family, healing from her guilt, and accepting responsibility for her actions. By avoiding these challenges, she sacrifices the possibility of deeper happiness in favour of a shallow, slothful contentment. The cost of this avoidance is not only her own emotional well-being but also the relationships that matter most to her, as her absence leads to greater harm for her loved ones. In order to overcome Eternal Sugar, she'll need to learn to finally confront these problems. Finally learn to properly heal, and not rely on the berry juice to solve her problems.

[thetraumaking]

The Accurses Crown

Other chapters

Chapter 11: Payback

As months passed, the sense of debt did nothing but grow. The more you care for her the more she wants to prove herself to you. 

She has seen parents praise and flaunt their children, and their mediocre achievements, as if they were war heroes. She has also noticed how her father had been bringing you more and more to his meetings and war functions. Even her grandfather had sent you on a siege on one of the Earth kingdom’s territories(you of course came back victorious.) 

The two have been shoving new titles and privileges onto you. And knowing full well they can’t simply hand it to you, they have been forcefully sending you out for war so you could earn them. 

Every other week there seems to be a party for your success behind the palace walls. And since no self-respecting noble wears an outfit more than once, each month they have been ordering new and more complex designs. truly a golden age for tailors and designers. 

It was wonderful to see you shine and have the recognition you deserve but the peaceful times where you would train her or cook for her have been sacrificed. Rather than every day, her training sessions with you have decreased to once every five days. 

She missed spending time with you. She missed having you do her hair. She missed your flavourless cooking that was rich in vitamins and minerals. She missed your hands on her head. 

Soon, the little time she would spend with you diminished when she was sent away to the Royal Fire Academy, you couldn’t even send her off(her grandfather had sent you away for yet another mission.)

She missed those moments more when her environment changed. Azula was born and grew up within the palace, with countless servants, large halls, and expensive decor that had years of history. All that was now replaced with cheap replicas and her room -may be the biggest in the student dorm- now thrice smaller. She couldn't even have her meals within her room and was required to be in the dining halls during meal time, surrounded by leeches who wanted to suck up to her. 

Though it is fun watching them try but the ones that did approach her simply could not fully comprehend her greatness. All they knew was that she was the princess, nothing more and nothing less. They didn’t know the fact that she was a bending prodigy or that she had been receiving special training from one of the elite soldiers within the kingdom. 

Once, prior to her attending the academy, she requested from her grandfather if she would be able to accompany you to one of your battles. Her grandfather didn’t allow it, stating that she is far too young and though the battle experience would aid her but the facts still remain, her bending skills leave much to be desired. 

She knows that she isn’t at your level yet. But she also acknowledges that she is ahead of her peers. With just a bit more training, she knows that she will be qualified to attend the war meetings alongside you, gain more experience, and be more skilled than her brother could ever imagine. Someone who is strong enough so that even you would show no shame in relying on. 

So with her goal set in mind, she did her own training. Every day for up to five hours, she trained, and for the remainder of the time she would study war tactics and history books. 

Her everyday life had become a routine, and while being so far away from you was troubling, time seemed to fly by. And before she knew it, she was on her way back to the palace for break. She had no recollection of the events that took place during her school days. The days simply sped past her and there were no memorable moments to look back to. 

She guessed the only lesson she received from the academy was that month-long falconry class. 

Once her ship had docked, Azula was quick to hop off to be greeted by her home. Her servants and guards stood by in a neat formation, all with their heads down, bowing to her. 

She paid them no mind, instead, she searched through the crowd. Her eyes looking for yours yet she couldn’t see you. 

Walking to the nearest servant, she asked for your whereabouts. Were you perhaps on yet another mission? Why weren’t you here with everyone to greet her? To congratulate her for a successful full year at the academy?

The response she got was not to her liking. 

Her jaw clenched as she marched to the training ground as her fists began to steam, releasing small puffs of fire with each swing. She was unaware of the maids that shared worried glances to one another after the burnt footprints that were left behind each of her steps. 

“Y-your Highness before you go to the Major, you must go greet His Majesty-”

“Are you, a lowly commoner, telling me, the princess, what to do?” She turned to the now fearful maid. How dare she? Who does she think she is?

“N-no Your Highness! Please forgive me! It won’t happen again.”

“It better not. Why don’t you make yourself useful and take my luggage to my room?” Before she continued on her route, she spared the maid one final glance. She took a good look at her, “If I find anything missing, I'll hold you responsible.”

With that, she left. 

When she made it to the ground, she made it in time to see you flip her brother. Zuko harshly landed on his back, clearly getting winded. 

The display of her brother getting hurt would have brightened her mood if he didn’t smile up at you. She felt her eyebrow twitch. 

Normally, when something as minuscule as a scraped knee would warrant the water works, he laughed when he got slammed onto the ground. 

She watches you give him a hand, lecturing him about the attack that took place. The softness in your eyes stirred something in her. 

She felt her face get hot, you were reserved for her and her alone, Zuko already has his mother, so why must he feel the need to step in between you? How greedy can he be? 

Her brows furrowed and before she knew it, she had sent a blast of fire towards him. 

Before he could get hit, before her aim could strike true, you pushed him back to the ground. The blast just grazing you before it hit the wall, scorching it black. 

“Ack-Azula!” Zuko yelled out. “What’s wrong with you?! You could have hurt someone!”

“That’s the point.” She glared at him before sending another blast his way. 

Her attack travelled halfway before being countered by another, the collision between the two sent dirt and small debris into the air. She covered her eyes before looking to the one that stopped her fire. 

You took a step closer to her, your sleeve slightly burned from her first attack but otherwise, you were unharmed. “Azula, I don’t know what has upset you but you need to calm down.” Your stance was passive but your tone was stern. 

Azula remained on the offensive, “Why are you protecting him?! Are you choosing him over me?! ME?!” This time she targets her attack on you. 

“Azula calm down, that’s unbecoming!” You dodge to the side, putting distance between you and Zuko. 

Seeing that there is no calming her down, you decided to let her blow some steam off. Ever since she was young, her reactions tend to be explosive and she seemed to be leaning a bit towards the trigger happy side. You were planning on coaching her to get more control over her emotions, a healthy outlet so to speak. Maybe this is the perfect time to work on it 

“Zuko, you did well on your training today, why don’t you go take a bath and enjoy the rest of the day?” You suggested plainly all the while dodging and countering the angry attacks of Azula. 

“B-but Azula—”

“I got her, you have nothing to worry about.” You tried to wave him off. 

Your lack of attention drove her mad. 

“Stop ignoring me!” She sent a bigger blast. Why are you still talking to him when she’s right here in front of you? Look at her! Talk to her!

Pay attention to me!

“… are you sure?” He got up on his feet, shielding his face from the heat and dust.

“You are kind, but rest assured I’ll be fine. We’ll be joining you for dinner later so please get your rest.” You reassured him before ducking down to avoid a blast to the face while making sure he did leave. 

“Huh.” You noticed the slow increase in temperature and the duration of the stray blasts that were still ablaze before sending her an attack of your own. “Dodge it!”

She lets out a frustrated yell before rolling out of the way. Landing on her knees, she punches with two fists, sending two balls of fire at the same time. 

This time, her fire came out lighter in color. Since that one, they became lighter and lighter. But she paid them no mind. 

Her breathing became ragged, and after an hour or so of non stop onslaught of attacks, she fell to her knees. She heard you walk up to her though she was too busy trying to catch her breath. Her hands clutching at the dirt while she’s gasping. 

“You did well, I can tell you’ve been doing your own training.” You praised, stopping just a few steps from her. “The only critique I can give you is that you forgot your breathing, take controlled slow breaths, this way you can fight longer and better. More oxygen to your brain, the better decisive you can be in battle.” You fold your arms over your chest. “Also, when you-”

“Shut up!”

She saw red, how humiliating for her to let you see her in such a state. Zuko must have planned this. Unbecoming. And yet here you are, still with her. She felt shame. 

She didn’t deserve you. 

If only she could show her gratitude to you in some way in some shape or form. Her father and grandfather already showering you with titles and riches, so what can she do? What is something that she has and that only she can do? 

Whenever she gets wounded, you tend to her injuries. If only she could do the same. Maybe if she was stronger, maybe she could… 

Taking a deep breath in, she shot her hand up towards you. 

She expected red but out came blue. 

Not even you expected such a brilliant color. The shock combined with the close proximity did not provide you time to evade the blast. It hit you in the chest. Your supposed high grade body suit that was rumoured to be fireproof melted. The molten fabric fusing with your now blistering skin as you were sent back to the ground. 

You head hitting the ground hard before you were promptly knocked out. 

Azula’s hand shook as her eyes focused on your unconscious form. You lied there in front of her, covered in sweat and dirt, with your chest open and roasted. 

She wanted to run to you, to ask for forgiveness for hurting you. 

But she didn’t. 

She stayed rooted on all fours. Letting out ragged breaths as she lowered her hand to her face. 

She attacked you. She hurt you. And now you, her strong and dependable guardian, looked so vulnerable. So… in need of care. 

Her warm fingers felt her lips. 

She was smiling. 

[tgrailwar-zero]

You relinquished the floor to MAX. He took a breath, before stepping up and looking around the chamber. He began to speak, his voice filling the empty space.

MAX: "I didn't realize that today I would be suddenly requested to defend someone's life. If I had, I'd perhaps request more time… but we all have to make do with the time that we have, and I did my due diligence with what I was granted. I walked in, looked upon my clients, and realized that even if the stakes weren't so high, I would be honored to be their defense."

MAX: "See, I can attest that these are good souls. Looking upon how they conducted themselves in recent memory has made that evident. Not more than a week ago, the Nameless City faced tragedy. A Beast, summoned upon the Solar Cell, luckily still within its larval state. As Heroic Spirits, we could all feel its presence. The chill in the air, the prickle at the back of our necks, and the urge to drop what we were doing and save the city. And many Servants did. Lord Sigurd and Lady Brynhildr among them."

MAX: "However, the Beast was defeated not by any of our brave heroes, but by our unlikely Interlopers. Does anyone recall what happened?"

NIKITICH: "Ah yes, the pillar of light."

MAX: "Correct. Through their contract, they called forth the might of their Servant and allowed it to cleave through the Beast. The city found itself saved, and the Solar Cell able to return to peace. This is to not say that the Servants of the Solar Cell could not have defeated the Beast eventually, but the rate of destruction would have certainly been higher. Their assistance was greatly impactful. So much so, that they became the treasured guests of the Lord and Lady of the Nameless City. An honor that very few people have had the pleasure of achieving."

SIGURD: "It's the truth. They saved our city, and I am grateful for them."

You watched as BRYNHILDR stepped closer to SIGURD, lightly squeezing his hand.

BRYNHILDR: "…We are grateful."

MAX: "Thank you. From my experiences, Lord Sigurd is an honest man, and Lady Brynhildr is a woman of rectitude. I can attest the same traits to my clients. Was there a mistake made, absolutely. There is no doubt on that front, and I will not argue otherwise. However, I do emphasize that it was a mistake, made with good intentions. A failed attempt at maintenance, that was cleaned up as swiftly as possible. Listen, am I telling you to accept them as the Solar Cell's IT professional? Perhaps not--"

You saw CLEOPATRA half-smile, and NIKITICH and SETANTA stifle a laugh.

MAX: "--But I do insist that they deserve to live. If Lord Sigurd saw them fit for forgiveness, if Lady Brynhildr saw them fit for forgiveness, if even Miss Rindr and the Valkyrie thought kindly enough of them to fulfill their request for counsel without delay… then does that not show strength of character? The Valkyrie are drawn to those with noble hearts, after all. And noble, these once 'Interlopers' are. They slew the Beast, they saved our Solar Cell. After you hear all of the details, you'll be asked to vote upon their fate. I hope those details lead you to the decision that my client deserves life."

You observed a bit of cross-chamber eye contact from between each of the Lair Servants as MAX finished. The only one who didn't engage was the ADMINISTRATOR, who's gaze didn't leave your position. Locked. Focused. Intense. It only ended, briefly, when the Keeper acknowledged her.

PTOLEMAIOS: "Thank you, Maxwell. Madame Administrator?"

With a swift, elegant movement she jumped from her loge and gracefully across from you and MAX.

ADMINISTRATOR: "That's a rather pretty tale. As always, you're ever the sharp-tongued, Maxwell."

ADMINISTRATOR: "However, you neglected to mention that the Priestess had to practically beg for their assistance, and they were more concerned with haggling and haranguing rather than the safety of the Solar Cell's citizens. And who is to say that this wasn't carefully constructed by their own benefit? Create a problem, solve it, have us indebted. Target a noble soul like Sigurd first, and then squirm their way into a position of comfort before rending it all asunder."

MAX: "…"

ADMINISTRATOR: "You weren't around, Maxwell, but I remember the time before the Origin War quite well. And then, soon after we let the Interlopers in, welcomed them, saw them as allies... Asclepius has a blade in his back, Ozymandias is forced to destroy himself in a suicide attack, Uesugi Kenshin dies upon her own pagodas, Karna is destroyed in a earth-shaking duel, and the surface of the Solar Cell and even deeper is scorched."

ADMINISTRATOR: "All because we were too forgiving. Too open. Too soft-hearted."

ADMINISTRATOR: "It is true that Lord Sigurd has forgiven them. It is true that they defeated the Beast. However, it is also true that they were responsible for the birth of said Beast, and that they've served as a danger to the Solar Cell not only before their sealing, but after their awakening as well."

Snapping her fan, you felt the attention in the room be drawn to the ADMINISTRATOR, as if she was magnetic. A beauty that could turn heads and topple countries- that's what CAT described her and the other facets as- 'country ruiners'.

ADMINISTRATOR: "Quetzalcoatl has vanished to the winds, and Asclepius is lost to us. Which one of us is next? So close to our goal, which one of us next? We can't go through something like the Origin War again. We need to remember that we are survivors. That we are humanity's last hope. And last hopes cannot be laden with risks, even with all of our grandeur."

She gestured broadly to her peers.

ADMINISTRATOR: "Respecting what Maxwell has told us, there are two options laying before us- either they're blind fools with the destructive power to set loose an Evil of Humanity by total accident, or they're malicious and smart enough to play the fool. Either way, to cut them out now would be the most efficient course of action. I ask of you, let's not belabor our decision here, not when it can be handled so simply compared to everything else we have to do."

After MAX and the ADMINISTRATOR made their statements, you felt a silence settled over the Council. Not a cold silence, but a pensive one, as a few of them settled into their seats, realizing that this perhaps wouldn't be as quick of a trial as they thought.

A considerate silence. That was... good. They were paying attention, now it just meant keeping their attention- and keeping their perceptions receptive and positive.

The Keeper cleared his throat, regaining the Council's attention.

KEEPER: "Thank you, Madame Administrator. I'll open up the floor for responses and further questioning."

As soon as he declared it, you saw NIKITICH stand up, bestial ears twitching with anticipation.

NIKITICH: "So? The Administrator says that you have blood on your hands, is this true?"

MAX: "Slayer Nikitich..."

NIKITICH: "I am asking a question. You had your big speech, the Admin had her big speech, but I cannot ask my question? I ask again, how crimson are your palms, Interlopers?"

Before you could answer, she held up a hand, signaling that she wasn't done yet.

NIKITICH: "Furthermore, you slew the dragon-beast. I want to know the details, do not spare a thing. Did you talk with the dragon? Did you even truly wish to slay the dragon? Were you enticed by it, enthralled? Or was it a heartless monster that needed to be murdered?"

SIGURD: "Hm. I see."

SETANTA: "Is the Council boring you so much that you need a bedtime story already?"

KEEPER: "Is this relevant, Slayer?"

ADMINISTRATOR: "Yes, is it relevant? I thought you wanted to end this trial as quickly as possible."

NIKITICH: "This is relevant to me. I am sitting and looking at these 'Interlopers', and they are sitting there with their hands in their lap like a good little kid. Very polite. But... you know what they say: 'v tíxom ómute čérti vódjatsja.' Now, I want a tale about you and the dragon."

MAX: "...And so it begins, like I said, this is far from a traditional court. That's certainly more than 'a question', though... Anyways, you've been addressed directly, but I'm not going anywhere."

[acourtofthought]

You can't appreciate the story an author is trying to tell if you're spending your time trying to fit your own morals, opinions, etc. into your reading experience.

Reading is about letting go of your preconceived notions, freeing yourself from the rules you live by in your real life.

That doesn't mean you abandon your human decency once you put the book down, it simply means upon entering their fictional world you arrive with a blank canvas so the author can paint the picture for you.

If you fail to grasp then, then you'll never truly experience the journey they're trying to take you on.

Can you dislike the direction the author went? Sure! Can you hate that she made the bad guy a "good guy", the "hero" of the story? Yes! But you can't mistreat readers who have chosen to suspend their disbelief for the sake of "listening" to the author. For understanding what the author is trying to say. For giving the author the respect they deserve for the story they are trying to tell. Just because you dislike something doesn't erase the direction they went.

The acotar fandom way too often tries to claim moral superiority because they look down on character X's actions and how horrible others are for liking them because that must means they'd be fine with allowing it in real life.

To those people I say you're not grasping the point of a fictional fantasy world. Or even a fictional world. Both of which are created by authors for entertainment value only.

I'm sorry anyone feels triggered by the things Jurian said or did in the past and I feel bad that it still disturbs them but is the readers personal opinion about Jurian more valid than Sarah's personal opinion in terms of the story she's trying to tell?

Is anyone getting the vibe that Sarah wants her readers to hate Jurian? I'm not. In fact, I get the vibe that Sarah wants readers to now like his character and to realize he's influential to the human lands. That doesn't mean all readers like him just because Sarah said so but regardless of someone's opinion of Jurian the story has moved forward with him as a good guy at heart to the characters in the book.

Feel free to have personal opinions but maybe stop forcing personal opinions into understanding what the author is saying for the sake of the story.

You can personally dislike Jurian while still acknowledging that within the acotar world he's no longer supposed to be a bad guy and that means if Elain were to become friendly with him it's OK because again, the acotar world has forgiven him even if you haven't.

[autumn0689]

The Burning Maze is my favorite TOA book and it brings me so much pain… so much pain… but I LOVE IT!!!!

I love that Grover is in it! (He is one of my favorite characters from the series) and Meg dealing with going back to her childhood home! The Arrow of Dodona was, as always, a fantastic character.

It was nice to see Piper and Jason again and that, even though they broke up, they still deeply cared for each other. Caligula was such a good antagonist and Medea was also so good, especially with Piper taking revenge and killing Medea.

Crest was such a fun character and his death is kind of traumatizing, like, Apollo is trapped, in literal pain and forgetting himself as Grover and Meg were dangled over Helios’s essence and Crest kept distracting Medea even as he was stabbed by her like… that’s SO FUCKING DARK!!

I love how it ended with Apollo vowing to keep Jason’s promise to remember to be human.

Other miscellaneous things that I enjoyed was also:

Apollo’s dreams that involved Caligula, like the one in which he ordered a guard to kill Tiberius and the one in which he basically pretended to be the Sun God.

I also liked Caligula’s motives in that Apollo was VERY valuable to him alive, but rather than being like Commodus, who wanted to kill him so that he can rename Indianapolis to Commodianapolis, he wanted to take Apollo’s remaining essence and combine it with Helios’s to become the new Sun God (not to say that I didn’t like Commodus’s motives, it’s just that Caligula is very interesting in that he wanted to become the Sun God)

Honestly Caligula as a whole was such a good character. He has such an intimidating presence throughout the book, and I loved it when he finally got to see Apollo he kind of gushed over him, being excited to finally have him in his clutches, and I love how after Apollo stabbed himself he was all ‘I won’t touch a sorceress’s purse’ and how he was so upset that Piper was knocked unconscious. Honestly if there ever is a TOA show they gotta cast the Emperors right because all the Emperors are horrible yet interesting in their own merit.

I love the conversation that Jason and Apollo had before they left his dorm. I love how Jason tells Apollo that he tried to defend him to Zeus and that Apollo was shocked. I love how Jason made him promise to remember his experience being human and how, even to the last book, Apollo is still thinking about the promise he made.

I love how Meg is just able to show Apollo her memories?? How the fuck did she learn to do that??!! Also the fact that it’s never addressed how she can do this.

Speaking of Meg, I love how revenge obsessed she is, like she was full on ready to murder Caligula and how at the end acknowledges that she was taking her anger for Nero out on Caligula instead (not to say Caligula doesn’t deserve it, but moreso that she realizes that instead of confronting her feelings for Nero, she pushed those feeling into killing Caligula) and I love how Meg is such a strong character, having to deal with going back to her childhood home and having to revisit those old, painful memories of a happier time in her life that was taken away from her, and how, in the final book, she confronts Nero and finally stands up for herself and as she says ‘defeats the Beast’. I just love Meg’s arc.

I love Apollo’s self sacrifice. He has always been a somewhat selfless character, willing to save others over him, but this truly defined his character, how he was willing to do anything to save his friends, and how he most likely would have succeeded had it not been the Arrow of Dodona. I also love how Meg calls him a hero and how his perspective of what defines a hero is being changed.

I love how Wah Wah has SUCH a hatred of Tip Toe Through The Tulips by Tiny Tim that he would rather tell Apollo and Piper where the shoes are than to bear through the music.

I also love how, to me, the kind of dark comedy of Caligula taking your very words LITERALLY!! It’s almost comical how a character vows something only for them to realize ‘oh shit’ as Caligula gleefully fulfills on that promise (like when Wah Wah would give his heart to Caligula or how he ordered for a poets tongue to be cut out and dipped in silver so that they could see his ‘silver tongue’) it’s just… Caligula is SUCH a good character!

I love how Aloe Vera is constantly fretting over anyone who has any injuries. I just like how Apollo wakes up sometimes covered in Aloe Vera’s healing slime.

I love the entire Macro’s Military Madness section. I love as Macro was talking about taking Apollo and killing the satyrs that Coach Hedge was struggling to open a pack of grenades. I love how Apollo landed in another dumpster again and how he peed himself and got himself some pink camo pants.

I love Coach Hedge, he’s such a funny character, especially when he was ready to fight the Automatons in Macro’s Military Madness and had to basically be dragged away.

The entire section of Apollo in molten chains as Medea tries to kill him is such an intense moment. It is such a dark scene, especially as Apollo is loosing himself, loosing his memories and how he is in pain and his skin is being described as being cracked open?! It’s such an intense scene and is one of my favorite moments in the book and one of my favorite moments in all of the Riordan-verse books.

I love the Meliai and how they say ‘HAIL TO THE MEG’ I just love how badass they are. I also love how after they kill Incitatus everyone is just staring at the Meliai with shock and horror.

There are so many other amazing scenes in the book! Honestly it’s one of my favorite books of all time. Honestly the TOA series is so good! I do admit that Apollo is sometimes annoying with how arrogant he is, but his character development is so good! I adore these books so much, so if anyone can recommend me any good fics PLEASE DO!!!

[sunshinelivesforever]

My Opinion on Calypso and Caleo in HOO

Alright, it's time to talk about this because I love the smell of fresh controversy in the morning. So today, I'm going to be expressing my opinion on the character Calypso and the ship Caleo in The Heroes of Olympus. Keep in mind that this is simply my opinion. Feel free to disagree.

I'll be honest and straightforward. I don't really like Calypso and I don't ship Caleo.

Sure, I get that it must've been hard for Calypso. She was cursed to fall in love with heroes who eventually had to leave. She was abandoned on an island with no one else for company just for supporting her father in a war, resulting in her missing eons of change in the world. She must've been really lonely and upset and sick of having her heart broken. But that's no excuse for her to be so mean, especially because she wasn't like that when we saw her initially. In TBOTL, she was so sweet. How can someone so soft-spoken and polite become so nasty? I was hoping that after she stops being mad we could get to see the Calypso we saw in the original PJO series. But apparently, that Calypso is gone. It seems like her entire personality was changed just to make her a "tough girl" (which isn't exactly the character's fault). It's just that so many writers assume that to make a female character strong she can't have any soft traits. But in TBOTL, Calypso was strong and caring and kind at the same time. So if you ask me if I like Calypso in BOTL, yes, absolutely. But if you ask me if I like Calypso in HOH and TOA? No, I don't.

I also don't like her relationship with Leo. Okay, maybe I'm a bit biased about this since I'm in love with Leo myself, but the whole thing just happened so quickly. We needed an entire book for Frazel, an entire book for Jiper, a whole dam series for Percabeth and you're telling me these two fell in love in the span of four chapters? Like, is falling in love really that easy? I don't think so. What Leo and Calypso have just doesn't seem deep enough for me. And their relationship is kind of toxic as well. Like in TOA, Calypso never tried to understand Leo or actually acknowledge his help. She acts as if Leo is worth nothing. I deeply dislike the way she treats Leo. And for Leo, I feel like he doesn't genuinely love Calypso. I feel like he wanted to go rescue her because he felt like he finally had someone who chose him, someone who needed him. Because for once, he wasn't the seventh wheel. The odd one out. The second option. Also, I kind of get the feeling that Calypso was there just so that Leo could get a love interest and not be a seventh wheel. But Leo deserved more than that. He deserved a different kind of love. He deserved coming home to find that he belongs, to find that there are people who care about him, that his friends need him. He deserved acceptance from his surroundings to actually not feel like a seventh wheel. He needed to find that coming back to life was worth it because he has friends, he has a family. I feel like just a romantic relationship can't give him that, especially one with Calypso, who knows nothing of his trauma and experiences.

So there you have it, that's why I don't like Calypso and don't ship Caleo. Please don't hate on me for this because it's just my opinion. Keep in mind that you can have a different opinion and disagree with mine, and that's okay.

Yours in demigodishness and all that, peace out. :)

[saintsenara]

everlasting ink harry potter/ginny weasley teen | 6.2k words

‘blood is thicker than water,’ they all muttered, conspiratorially, when percy left. but, ginny will think, as delphini manages to turn harry into a teddy bear and run into the crystalline stream, water is just as life-giving as blood.

ginny weasley has always been a magnet for dark-haired orphans. what's one more?

this piece was written for week ten of @ladiesofhpfest, on the theme of daughters [you can find the masterlist for this week's fics here].

as i’ve said elsewhere about this piece, i am not ordinarily a hinny fan. i am a sweety, though, and was perfectly happy to be the sort of lovely lass who would write noted twee hinny girly @whinlatter her favourite couple, as a treat.

i've also written her some notes.

my reasoning for thinking that harry and ginny don’t really work is that, frankly, i think ginny deserves better. after all, she spends most of the seven-book canon being kept at arm’s length from harry’s mission - with a brief, and iconic, burst of forcing her way in during order of the phoenix - because he spends books one to four not really interested in her (which, fair, i tried to hang around with my brother’s friends when i was little and it was not well received) and because he spends books six and seven actualising her into a place of safety, a person who needs to be protected, rather than his supporter and equal in the task he has been dealt.

as i’ve written about many times - and as i’ve had numerous enjoyable conversations with @ashesandhackles about - i cannot even imagine how furious i would have been if i were ginny, to discover that my boyfriend seemed to be constitutionally unwilling to acknowledge that i spent the period in which deathly hallows takes place as a resistance leader in my own right.

but above and beyond this, i also think that the pre-epilogue harry is remarkably self-centred when it comes to his trauma. i don’t think this is malicious - or even particularly intentional - but i always find it striking that harry believes himself to be the only person of his acquaintance who is badly affected by dementors, or whose family was hunted down by the death eaters, or who was devastated to see sirius die.

or who was manipulated by tom riddle.

harry’s relationship with the young voldemort is incredibly interesting, not least for the way in which he separates this voldemort (attractive, orphaned, at home in hogwarts) out from the one who killed his parents. that harry understands and empathises with voldemort’s issues - especially his colossal childhood trauma - better than dumbledore does is one of the key themes of the series, and it is - of course - one facet of the purity-of-soul which makes him the books’ hero.

but it is also something ginny can’t ever relate to. after all, the voldemort that ruined her life was the one that harry feels sorry for.

the shadow of ginny’s first year is something which is glaring in canon by its absence. this isn’t, i think, harry’s fault, and nor do i think it’s jkr’s - that chamber of secrets needs to resolve itself neatly with an ‘and then everything was fine’ is a genre convention, since the book is children’s literature. but i do think that it’s something which is really valuable to explore.

because we do get hints that ginny is traumatised by her experience with riddle’s diary even when the books are still conforming to the conventions of children’s stories - above all, as mentioned in everlasting ink, that she seems to be equally as affected by the dementor on the train in prisoner of azkaban as harry is.

and yet all the attention goes to him.

everlasting ink was, then, an attempt to deviate from my usual way of looking at this tension in harry and ginny’s relationship (break them up) and choose a different path (keep them together and happy). and i only had to scream into a pillow once or twice to get that done.

harry does not, i think it’s fair to say, initially appear to be acquitting himself well in the rekindled relationship. he throws himself into being the saviour of the world with a righteousness which blinkers him to anyone else's needs, he never asks ginny about what she is going through, he continues to view her as something to protect, he doesn’t dream about her when he’s reliving his almost-death, and - perhaps worst of all - he foists a daughter on her without asking.

[but perhaps we can forgive him this - after all, he doesn’t really have any experience of motherhood which isn’t sacrificial, or mothers who make their children something other than the entire focus of their self-conception. although i do still think he might have spent a little bit of time thinking about why plopping a toddler with the patented riddle face (those muggle genes are strong, lord voldemort is turning in his grave) on his girlfriend might not have been the best idea he’s ever had…]

this is the part of the author’s note where i out myself as a delphini stan account. [i think her conception makes sense! the entire point of the series is that lord voldemort can't outrun basic human biology! it’s not his fault that he was daydreaming about horcruxes when slughorn was trying to teach him sexual education!] the bellamort baby is a great little plot device for an examination of all sorts of people’s post-war neuroses, and she’s really delivering here, providing a little window not only into harry and ginny’s relationship but into ginny’s wider understanding of her position in her family.

it’s always struck me that ron’s belief, expressed in deathly hallows, that ginny is the favourite child doesn’t seem to be reflected in canon (the favourite child, by quite some distance, is clearly bill). which isn’t to say that ron’s feelings of neglect are invalid - he clearly is overlooked! even though his parents love him and are trying their best! in particular, i've always noticed that ginny’s suffering during her first year doesn’t make her special within the family - as she points out in this piece, nobody ever remembers that she nearly dies.

but there is also a gendered implication to what the locket spills about ron’s darkest secrets - that he thinks that ginny is special within the family solely because she is a daughter. and i have always wondered how that experience - of being the last and longed-for girl to make the family complete - might weigh on her.

so the main familial relationship examined in this piece is the mother and daughter one: ginny and delphini; hermione and rose, and - of course - ginny and her own mother.

i’m always struck that molly weasley must - like her narrative mirror, narcissa malfoy - be quite lonely. this is, i think, not exactly what the narrative wants us to read her as: the text sets her up as central to the weasleys and pseudo-weasleys’ worlds, and most scenes set at either the burrow or grimmauld place take place around mealtimes, with kitchens and dining rooms cast in the story as molly’s domain. and, while this association of good mothers with domestic labour is something i am critical of in the series, i do acknowledge that it makes narrative sense in a way which evidently isn’t intended to be condescending. the weasleys are harry’s first experience of the family life he desires above all else, which - naturally - features as its maternal figure someone who is the polar opposite of the detached, brittle, and cold petunia.

but, on the other hand, the narrative excludes molly from the rest of the family once the domestic sphere is left. she is the only one of them not to like quidditch (there is, after all, no meaningful reason why she would miss the world cup if she did), she doesn’t seem to have any friends of her own (whereas arthur, who seems to be sincerely popular in the ministry, does), and the child with whom she is most aligned - percy - is estranged from her for much of the series. in terms of personality, she lacks the daring streak which defines the other weasleys, she is more interested in social convention, and she is less flexible in how she defines things like ambition or success.

and i think it’s worth noting that this loneliness is gendered. all of the weasley children - and arthur - help out around the house, absolutely, and i don’t think that it’s ever possible to suggest that ron and his brothers become the sort of boors who don’t lift a finger while their wives do everything; but molly’s place within the family is still defined by providing. she is a table or a hand-knitted jumper or a cake. and the rest of the weasleys, who go out and live active lives away from the home, are not.

i always wonder if this is something we’re supposed to read behind molly’s dislike of fleur. that, maybe, she was hoping for a daughter-in-law who would be a kindred spirit, and gets instead someone who considers any sort of domestic role to be beneath her. it is, undoubtedly, also something which features in her relationship with ginny.

and so everlasting ink deals with ginny maturing from an adolescent chafing against her mother’s experience of womanhood - which she sees through her child’s eyes as meaning playing with dolls and being a housewife - into something which understands the complex web of dreams and disappointments which drive molly’s life, and which enables her to embrace the similarities between the two of them she might have once run from.

because they are very similar. above all, i always think that the canonical ginny must also be quite lonely. we are told she’s popular, but all of her friendships seem to be tenuous - she never writes to or visits anyone, harry never notices her with a particular close friend, she spends a full summer not seeing her boyfriend (an insult from jkr towards dean’s canonical rizz).

in particular, i never feel that her friendship with hermione is as close as fanon makes out (nor, indeed, as close as harry suggests it is in half-blood prince - he should have a think about how likely it seems that hermione has any time for other friends when she’s locked in a codependent triad with him and ron), and my view has always been that post-war ginny and hermione would take a long time to become comfortable with each other. some of this is just due to them having to learn how to let their opposing personality traits work together (ginny has no interest in hermione’s constant desire to argue, push, and debate - she’s going to see it, like harry does, as nagging and meddling), but it’s also due to the fact that neither of them can really relate to the defining experiences of the other’s life in the way teenage girls might ordinarily be expected to be able to.

but they get there. even if bitching about their daughters is the way they have to do it.

the harry potter series’ quasi-mystical view of motherhood means that it has a tendency to treat adoption as something negative. we have three examples of kinship adoption in canon - harry’s by petunia, neville’s by his grandmother, and teddy’s by andromeda - and all come about because of a tragedy in which the biological mother sacrifices herself for the anti-voldemort cause.

all three are also treated as something which is a cause of suffering to the adoptee - which, crucially, the series thinks is a good thing. harry’s neglect by the dursleys is considered character-building, and his orphanhood is set up several times in the text as the cause of his ability to understand love.

[on the flip side, voldemort’s own orphanhood is not permitted to be an excuse for his own struggle with the concept of love, and the narrative blames merope gaunt for not staying alive for him, by implying that she could simply have chosen not to bleed to death in childbirth if she’d had little of lily potter’s courage.]

but adoption is neutral. it happens for all sorts of reasons and it provokes all sorts of emotional responses in the people involved. and so it was important to me to show that ginny went on a journey from feeling as though the fact that delphini wasn’t her biological child was a bad thing to not caring about that in the slightest, and that all four potter children grow up equally loved by their parents and extended family.

more specifically, i wanted to focus on ginny choosing not to care about things like the tragedy of orphanhood to the detriment of being happy and silly. i talk a lot about how i find the aspect of love which the harry potter series focuses on - love as suffering and sacrifice, love which is rooted in loss, love which has, to some degree, an element of fate behind it - insufficient. the canon narrative rarely approaches love as something comforting, pleasurable, self-indulgent, or fun - indeed, harry and ginny’s brief burst of a love which is all of these things is snatched away at the end of half-blood prince so that harry can focus on love-as-sacrifice - and it also rarely approaches love as something people choose. love drives characters’ choices - snape chief among them - but the text tends to imply that these choices were made because the love itself was innate and unstoppable.

but that’s kind of bullshit. in the vast majority of relationships we have in our lives, love - whether romantic, platonic, or familial - is a choice freely and constantly made. love as a choice - above all, how love is a very strange choice - is a key theme in everlasting ink, both from the perspective of harry and ginny’s decision to make their relationship work and from the perspective of them becoming part of a sprawling post-war found family.

this gave me a chance to explore one of molly’s most underappreciated traits - that she is someone who collects waifs and strays, and that she is extraordinarily generous in how she opens up herself to these people. i think this is often missed in fanon criticism of her for meddling or being overbearing in the lives of people who aren’t her immediate family - particularly in relation to sirius in order of the phoenix. i wanted her to be the source of the idea that ‘water is just as life-giving as blood’, and for her obvious affection for delphini to be a turning point in ginny’s relationship both with her own role as a mother and with her role as a daughter.

in particular, i wanted it it to change how ginny thinks about heredity.

having to learn that your children have lives outside of you is a complicated experience for all parents, but for the parents of adopted children there is the additional complication of knowing that your child has the right to uncover who their biological parents were, no matter how painful that might be. for harry and ginny, this means becoming comfortable with the idea that delphini might want to have a relationship with the malfoys, or to speak to rodolphus lestrange about her mother, or to think positively about her father.

this would be difficult for them to face. obviously. but i think it would also be healing for them to realise that lord voldemort was not just a one-dimensional caricature of absolute evil but also someone with lots of admirable personality traits. (nor that the positive experiences which they - ginny especially, you can prise the headcanon that they were sincerely bffs from my cold, dead hands - had with him based entirely on lies). delphini is - both physically and in terms of personality - exactly like him, which means that she is funny and theatrical and daring and cunning and possessed of a great taste in tattoos. [he is also, as fans of the asenora cinematic universe will know, the source of her sweet tooth.]

the same is true of bellatrix - that she is very like both andromeda and tonks is a headcanon i’m wedded to, and i like the idea of harry and ginny coming to see her with more nuance as they begin to understand what she had in common with two women they adore.

[i’m not sure they ever get over delphini not liking quidditch, though - but i think they can both begrudgingly respect that voldemort learning the principles of unaided flight because he was terrible on a broom is iconic.]

[ijustliketoreadstuff]

The mistake that exposed Luka

Ever since Luka found out about Ladybug and Cat Noir’s identities, Luka had done the best he could to ensure that no matter what he knew about the two heroes, he wouldn't let it affect him in any negative way as he was fully aware that Monarch was constantly on the prowl for negative emotions. Instead, Luka had decided to look at his new knowledge in a different light. 

In “Migration”, when Marinette looks to Luka for advise about her troubles, she does at first feel guilty for asking him for help on account of that she broke his heart back in “Truth”. However, knowing now that it was because of the weight of Marinette’s responsibilities as Ladybug that ultimately left her no other choice but to break up with him, Luka had learned to make peace with their past relationship, after all, he got his answer as to why their relationship struggled, and in the end, Luka understood it was neither his nor Marinette’s fault they broke up. They both agreed to start a relationship, but inevitably realized that things between them just couldn't work out as a result of their personal matters.

(Luka quickly realizing back in “Truth” that Marinette is unable to commit to their relationship, but had no idea why)

Rather than succumb to the pain of his broken heart, Luka had decided to learn from his experience, allowing him to not only look past the troubles of his relationship with Marinette to repair their friendship, but to also learn a little more about himself throughout the whole process, inspiring him to even make new songs that were sometimes sad, and other times cheerful.

Realizing now that Marinette and Adrien were just doing the best they could with the life they were living, as both civilians and heroes,  Luka had decided that if either of them felt troubled about their lives, they would at least know that he would always be there for them. If they needed him, they knew where to find him, and as we saw in “Migration”, the two would do just that, never knowing Luka knew the struggles they were hiding behind their secret lives. However, from what we now understand, they were not the only ones Luka was helping.

Due to Luka’s caring and insightful nature, many people looked to him as  someone who could help them sort out their troubles and complicated feelings. And more often than not, the people he talked to were able to gain some much needed insight about their lives and obtain good advise from him about how to deal with their problems. For Luka, it was normal to see people make an effort to better themselves, and if he was able to look past peoples differences to help them and himself be a better person, then he was willing to trust that others were also able to make the effort to take what they had learned about themselves, with or without his help, and strive to change themselves for the better, rather than let their past actions and choices take the better of them. Unfortunately, what ultimately sealed Luka’s downfall, was his willingness to look past peoples differences and mistakes, and trust that if they were willing to acknowledge themselves, then they deserved just as much a chance as anyone.

(Bob attempts to convince everyone he has turned a new leaf and is willing to change things for the better)

When Bob Roth realized it would be no easy feat to recruit Luka, he decided to take advantage of Luka’s kind nature by making it seem like he wanted to take Luka’s word on the matters of changing and was now capable of admitting that he was not always honest to people like Anarka in the past, let alone to Kitty section when he promised them a record deal back in “Silencer”. By making it seem like he was willing to set aside his past to focus on being a better man, and a better record producer who would do everything he could to provide Luka and his  friends the attention and recognition they deserved for their hard work, Luka had decided to stick by his word that anyone can change, and even the worst of people deserved a second chance, so if Bob was willing to acknowledge his past actions and actually tell them how he planned to commit himself to making things up to them, then it was worth a shot to give him a chance as well. 

However, much to Luka's dismay, Bob had no intention to change his ways and was instead willing to do whatever he could to get what he wanted, and what he wanted was to recruit Luka so he could provide him a series of new songs that would bring him a higher profit than Jagged, especially since Jagged had now attempted to focus more of his attention on his family rather than producing new songs.

(Luka’s attempts to give Bob a chance nearly get him akumatized the moment he realizes Bob had every intention to take advantage of him and destroy the band his friends worked hard to build)

Luka’s attempts to trust Bob not only narrowly got him akumatized, but it had also unfortunately put a target on his back now that Monarch was aware Luka knew of both Ladybug and Cat Noir’s secret identities. Although Ladybug and Cat Noir were able to save the day near the end, Luka had decided to take responsibility for unintentionally tipping off Monarch that he knew of the heroes identities, by deciding it be best for him to leave Paris so Monarch would be unable to track him, after all, even if Ladybug and Cat Noir managed to defeat Gold Record, Monarch still knew who he was, where he lived and who his family was. 

Rather than hide things, Luka gave everyone solace in confiding with them that he needed to leave because he knew Ladybug and Cat Noir’s identities, and even though Adrien and Marinette wanted to persuade him to stay, as they were both determined to protect him at all costs, Luka knew it was not worth putting him as the top priority when the heroes top priority should be to defeat Monarch and retrieve the miraculous to free Paris. By trusting the people closest to him with his secret, without actually telling them who Ladybug and Cat Noir really were, Luka had ensured they would understand that his decision was simply something he needed to do, not just for his sake, but for the sake of everyone he cares about, something Marinette and Adrien understood well, given their hero lives revolved around making tough decisions.

Although Luka was kind enough to give anyone a chance, his experience with Bob had taught him the hard way that although anyone can change, not everyone wants to, and even though he now realizes people like Bob didn’t want to acknowledge their mistakes and sacrifice their privileges to commit to changing themselves, he understood there will always be others who will find the determination to want to be better upon realizing the error of their ways, something Luka was happy to learn his mother and father took a little more to heart. 

(Jagged renounces his life of fame and fortune to focus on being a better father)

(Anarka agrees to give Jagged a chance)

Realizing that Luka was able to stand up to Bob and refuse the temptation of fame and fortune, Jagged had decided to follow his sons lead and also give up the life of fame and fortune so he could commit to being a better father for his family, after all, its just as Luka said, money and contracts are just paper, it can never replace friends and family. Anarka in turn, understood she needed to try and think of others like she would with her children and give them a chance to not only talk, but show her they are more than the people she assumed would only get on her nerves and should be thrown off her boat on sight. 

With Luka away, only time will tell how his family and his friends will handle life without his presence, and with Monarch determined to obtain the information of Ladybug and Cat Noir's identities from him, no one knows what he will be willing to do the moment he realizes Luka is far out of his reach.

[allcanonisrelative]

Merry MASHoldays to my dear friend @cuddleswinchester! Dear Kellan, I had the honor, the privilege and the pleasure of crafting a gift for you. I decided to record a podfic of your story, ‘Curves Facing Up.’ I am still pretty new to podficcing, so this may not be as polished as others, but it was made with so much love.

I did, for a minute, entertain the thought of recording ‘Crabapple of my Eye,’ and offering only the first chapter to you as your holiday gift and the rest following as I had time over the course of the year, but I didn’t feel quite right offering an incomplete gift (but now that the idea is in my brain, it continues to intrigue), and besides, I felt that 'Curves Facing Up' is a beautiful illustration of what I love so much about your presence in this fandom and the richness you bring to us all: your knowledge of medicine and medical procedures gives such depth to your stories and your commentary on the episodes. But more than that, it’s the way you are able to show how what they are actually doing in surgery interplays with who they are as people.

On a personal note, I want to express how glad I am to know you and how much I enjoy everything about the way you interact with this show that we all love, from your cosplay to your stories to your love for memorabilia. You are a delight. And especially in regards to your writing, I want you to know how much your stories have moved and affected me – after reading a few of your more surgically-oriented fics, to then go back and watch the show and to know how much more is going on that we’re not seeing when they’re moving their stained-red hands beneath the stained-red drapes, it heightened all my senses of who these people are, of how incredibly skilled and dedicated they are, and also how horrific this situation is for them and how amazing they are for living through it, staying (mostly) sane, and holding on to their compassion and humanity. Rare the story that both changes and enhances one’s experience of the source material in such a profound way: your stories did that for me.

To speak specifically about Curves Facing Up, I found myself so drawn in to the details of the case that it wasn’t until a second read-through that I realized how delicately you found the balance between detail and pacing. I get the feeling that a medical professional and a layperson could enjoy it equally; the medical jargon never overwhelms the scene or slows the pace, every detail serves the story, and deepens our understanding of who these characters are as people. I found it so touching, the way you showed us Margaret being so used to doing everything herself and being so intensely competent that she could do it all herself, learning to lean on those around her. And Charles’ convoluted path to working himself up to just going to see Margaret at the end of a difficult day; the details you include about his thought process, his habits, his intentions, showing his hyper-awareness of everything around him even when he does not fully understand it (or himself).

And of course, Klinger and Kellye, the unsung heroes of the OR. As Margaret said to Charles: “[you don’t understand] how good I have to be at my job to make you look better at yours,” and that goes for everyone on every rung of the ladder. I was so touched to see Klinger’s dedication to his role in this operation, and the acknowledgment of his and Kellye’s skill and competence was so well-deserved and shown so deftly, it made me very emotional.

Happy MASHolidays, my friend! <3 Rosie

[into-september]

"Buddy Daddies" IS better than Spy x Family, but it left me with questions

First and foremoest: who is the audience?

I'm wondering because the concept screams of either seinen or fujo, but the foucs is run-of-the-mill shounen. We're throwing our heroes into a situation where they're forced to ask prickly questions about their values and their life choices, and we've got them making the expected discoveries and the obvious choices from that, but no effort is made to dig into the real question:

Why do Kazuki and Rei choose each other?

There are two possible answers to that question: One is a life-changing backstory, and the other is gay. And the singular thing keeping "Buddy Daddies" from greatness is that it never answers.

They're partners because reasons. They're living together because something about couch-surfing idk. They met each other when they were both at rock-bottom crossroads, but did minimally to pick each other up from there. How much do they even know about each other? They certainly don't seem to be particularly invested in why the other has lost at life. As the story begins, they're hardly coming across as friends, and to what extent they end there, it's because of the way Miri influences them, separately.

As such, Miri herself is little more than a plot devices setting events in motion. Too young to be a focal consciousness in a story centred on adult questions, the story never dwells on her and the harrowing experiences she goes through with little more than laughing. She's repeatedly separated from three different parental figures and meets that with nothing but the joy of a reunion, because of course she's not the interesting figure here. That'd be the daddies.

By the end, Rei wants them to be a "real family", but why does that family include Kazuki? By all accounts, that was just some co-worker crashing at his place and who dragged in a kid who changed everything. The show never once questions whether their family will involve anyone more or less: it's Kazuki-papa and Rei-papa and Miri; no talk about any possible new mamas except for the very first and the very last scene, nothing said about why Kazuki and Rei take it for granted that the other wants to raise this child with him.

And the thing is, the thing is, the answer is RIGHT THERE. Kazuki obviously thinks he cannot have the family he wants thanks to his job, or doesn't deserve it thanks to the same; Rei has been raised into the same job, deprived of any kind of parental love and is repeatedly told to "cast off" that weakness. What stands between them and the thing they want (Miri) is their profession as hitmen, albeit from radically different angles for them both. But the show never has them question their life outside of society; only when they lose Miri over it do they truly acknowledge that raising a child is incompatible with being a professional murderer, and even then they never reflect on what their career choice says about what kind of people they are.

It's a gimmick and an easy ticket to action scenes, but it is never challenged. We don't know why Kazuki chose this path and why Rei never broke free before, and when they decide to leave it, it is with the same narrative shrug as their choosing to make a family with another guy who they by all accounts isn't involved with.

And it is frustrating because they show - particularly in its latter half - seems to be hanging on the cusp of diving into it, in connecting the threads between these two lonely men with their differently ruined lives, their different pursuits of a violent lifestyle and the way this would explain why they'd each come to step out of it because of one little girl.

Don't get me wrong - the show is cute and the finale is satisfying in nearly every way I'd expect it. It's just so close to being super memorable, rather than another action-comedy buddy show.

If you want a show where Koki Uchiyama voices a gangster princeling forced into the choice between loyalty to the clan and the sweetness promised by his found family, where the questions about choosing a life of murder are pursued to their ugly end and where twelve episodes are plenty and then some for explaining why these kids are choosing each other, then let me tell you about our lord and savior kunihiko ikuhara and the buttplug kappa magical boy anime

And that one is not afraid to say gay

[planetofsnarfs]

Karma seems to have finally come for Harrison Butker after his bigoted commencement speech at Benedictine College, as he was publicly called out at the ESPY Awards.

Butker, a kicker for the NFL’s Kansas City Chiefs, went viral in May after he gave a commencement speech to the graduating class at Benedictine College. Instead of using his speech as a chance to inspire and encourage, he used it to express his hateful views as he attacked the LGBTQ+ community and women. He shamed the graduating women in the audience by telling them they needed to stay in their lanes and become mothers and wives. Butker minimized their accomplishments as he insisted their lives would only start and be fulfilling when they got married and had children. At least one woman present at the speech spoke out about how awful the experience was and how it made her graduation day less special.

Butker has refused to take back his comments or even acknowledge that a commencement speech wasn’t the place to talk about his bigoted views about women. Meanwhile, he has been relishing the praise from conservatives and fellow misogynists while painting himself as a brave, courageous hero for shaming women on their graduation day. He also faced no consequences from the NFL for using his platform to spread bigotry. So, it wasn’t surprising when he showed up at the ESPYS, smiling smugly for the camera and waving his Super Bowl ring around. Fortunately, he didn’t make it through the night without being roasted.

This year, tennis legend Serena Williams was chosen to host the 32nd annual ESPY Awards. During the ceremony, she took the time to highlight the importance of women’s sports with her fellow tennis legend sister, Venus Williams, and Abbott Elementary star Quinta Brunson. At one point, Venus commented, “Go ahead and enjoy women’s sports like you would any other sports because they are sports.”

“Except you, Harrison Butker. We don’t need you,” Serena quipped. Brunson echoed that sentiment, adding, “At all. Like, ever.”

The best part of that comment was that Butker definitely heard it, as he attended the ESPY Awards to support the three nominations that the Chiefs received. He also definitely heard the outbreak of cheers and applause that the callout generated, similar to how the women at Benedictine College had to endure the standing ovation Butker’s disgusting speech garnered. Unfortunately, the camera didn’t turn to him to get his reaction, but one can hope that he felt embarrassed as all eyes turned to him after he was publicly roasted by three women who are more successful and famous than he could ever dream of being.

It’s the perfect retribution as it gives him a tiny taste of what it’s like to be celebrating your achievements and have someone call you out. Of course, the major difference is that he actually deserved the callout, unlike the dozens of graduating women he shamed for no reason other than his bigotry. If he’s going to get up on a stage and tell women to stay in their lane, then he should be prepared for women to clap back. Women like the Williams sisters are going to remind him he’s the one who needs to stay in his own lane and stay out of women’s business because they literally don’t need him. They don’t need his opinions, support, or presence whatsoever because they’ll keep succeeding regardless of what an inconsequential football player thinks.

Given how many people have defended Butker, we can only hope more awards show hosts and public speakers follow the Williams sisters and Brunson’s lead. The women whose graduation he ruined will never get that special day back, but they may get some form of justice as other women refuse to allow Butker to celebrate his career without reminding him of his actions.

[windslar]

People You'd Like to Get to Know Better

i was tagged by @druidberries. Thank you!!

Tag under the cut because I went on a whole spiel about a popular novel that catches a lot of flak online and I don't know how to shut up (spoiler: it features 20-something-year-olds who open up brick-and-mortar businesses in downtown Boston like it's nothing, and trash in the form of a man named Kyle with an R).

Last Song: From the Start - Laufey

Favorite Color: Sage Tint by Benjamin Moore

Currently Watching: Only Murders in the Building and Modern Family (I watched the first couple seasons but never finished it. It's such a good background show).

Last Movie: Last one I watched in the theatres was Oppenheimer, but the last one I watched on streaming was Disenchanted (lol). I need more James Marsden in my life, especially after his performance in Jury Duty.

Currently Reading: It Ends with Us by Colleen Hoover. Before you get the pitchforks, I'm only reading it because of the ~discourse~. Besides, I had it downloaded in my Kobo long before it really blew up on tiktok and my curiosity was reignited after I saw the uproar about the casting. I have a lot of problems with this book: (1) it's not well-written and I should've put the book down the moment she started writing letters to Ellen Degeneres and thought she was a good celebrity for being charitable, (2) it doesn't delve into the systemic issues that play a role in why women stay with their ab*ser, (3) the marketing for this book ain't shit for categorizing it a romance novel. BUT, all my problems aside, I don't think the story itself romanticizes domestic ab*se and I think most readers recognize this (see this Slate article that talks about it better than I could). Here's an excerpt:

It seems like this part of the novel’s plot could be read in two very different ways: one, which the Mary Sue seems to pursue, is that Lily doesn’t react to ab*se in the appropriate way, and the book endorses all of her choices, and therefore both deserve condemnation. The other is an exercise in empathy: Hoover wrote an imperfect book on domestic violence, but if we require all of these narratives to be morally unimpeachable, there’s no room to acknowledge that there is no such thing as a perfect victim.

I haven't finished the book, but I read Kyle with an R doesn't get a satisfying comeuppance proportional to his actions. And while it would be nice to see the trash taken out, isn't this ending plausible and representative of a common experience among families with a history of ab*se?

I think my big criticism with the backlash surrounding this book and others like it is the assumption that their readers are "impressionable young girls". Not every work of fiction needs to portray the protagonist as a hero in every sense of the word. Not every positive quality assigned to a villain is "making the character redeemable". Not every work of fiction is meant to be didactic and scrutinized as if it were instructions on how to live a perfect life. Maybe I'm giving more credit where it's due, but I really think most readers are able to think critically. People love reading about complicated characters in messy situations. And while I think the characters in Hoover's book could be written better and fleshed out a lot more, that is neither here nor there. My point is: stop assuming women are stupid and incapable of forming their own opinion. Enjoyment of fiction is not endorsement of the actions exhibited by deeply flawed characters.

Sweet/Spicy/Savory: Savory. But after writing all that and posting it here on tumblr, maybe SPICY.

Last Thing I Googled: That Slate article so I could link it and before that I googled Blake Lively and learned that she has 4! children.

Current Obsession: Rowing! But only if I have an episode of Modern Family playing.

Currently Working On: TJOLC posts, Lightflower is kind of on the back burner right now on account of I-hate-posing-sims and the next few scenes require a lot of it. I just wish there was AI that would pose my sims for me based on dialogue I've written. I would betray my principles, climb up the paywall if I have to.

I'm tagging anyone who sees this and

(ETA: look at me getting cut off by my own self. Sorry I was distracted and heating up some food while typing this, but yeah, I tag anyone who sees this.)

[jakesuit0]

Susan Strong Review

Uncle Gumbald chopped down all the taffy trees…wait a minute, isn’t this season two? For the longest time, PB mentioning her great Uncle Gumbald (the “great” was recontextualized later) in this episode was viewed as early installment weirdness, just like the pictures of PB with gum relatives that return on her walls here. PB shooting down Finn’s suggestion that he chopped the trees down because they were “evil trees” helps to set Gumbald up as a dick. Princess Bubblegum inquires about all the stories Finn must have about his human relatives. Considering how close she is with Finn and Jake, it doesn’t make much sense that she would think Finn has that knowledge. Her social awkwardness around bringing up the touchy subject (twice!) does make sense though.

While the series has acknowledged the seemingly near extinction of the human race once before, this is the first time Finn acknowledges it and we see how he feels about the subject. Finn isn’t lonely and does have a home, but there is a part of him that feels like an outsider. In a world full of amazing people and places, maybe being Ooo’s hero is how he proves himself and finds that sense of belonging. This starts a new character arc for Finn that will not be resolved for a long time. Jake is aware of these feelings Finn has and is immediately sympathetic. He knows how to cheer Finn up by having him toss the Jakesploder. 

Finn and Jake find a hatch to a nuclear fallout shelter containing human ancestors, later called hyomoons. This confirms what was already assumed, the nuclear war is what caused the end of the human race. The hyomoons have animal hats similar to Finn’s, establishing them as an important part of human culture and not just unique to Finn, even if we don’t know their true purpose yet. The hyomoons have lost touch with their heritage, culture, society, and even language from living underground for hundreds of years. They are terrified of anything new to them. Jake briefly wants to rule them like angry gods, one of the more memed lines of dialogue from the show. Finn believes it is his duty to help his people and bring them to civilization. This foreshadows his role in “The Light Cloud” when he tries to do the exact same thing. The hyomoons being isolated and fearful of the outside world is the same situation the humans of Founder’s Island are in. Maybe the way the hyomoons interact with the outside world, and eventually come into conflict with the Candy Kingdom, is indicative of what happens after the humans return to Ooo in “Come Along With Me”. 

Finn meets Susan Strong for the first time, her name coming from a miscommunication. Finn is overjoyed to meet other humans, and the introduction of another (possible) human is given the importance it deserves. Susan is the leader of the tribe, and seemingly the smartest, probably stemming from her (as we’ll learn later on) being the only one with experience above ground even with her amnesia. Originally in the episode, all the members of the tribe were supposed to come out with Finn. This was changed because it was hard to keep track of all the characters. Just having Susan come out with Finn also allows a more personal and emotional connection to be formed. 

Susan is immediately terrified of the grass, so Finn reassures her by telling her “grass can’t hurt you”. Well that turned out to be a lie. It’s crazy how well this accidentally works as foreshadowing, especially with Jake telling Finn he killed her after she faceplants into the grass. Finn and Jake take Susan around Ooo and we get a couple continuity references in a row. They all dance with a dancing bug like the one in “Power Animal”. They revisit the cliff in Red Rock Pass from “It Came From the Nightosphere”. At first I thought the fallen tree they sit on was the same tree Finn chopped down to use as a table for his spaghetti dinner in “To Cut a Woman’s Hair”, but alas I checked and it’s not. Missed opportunity! Finn is so happy to have a human friend that he sings a catchy, sweet song about it in Rebecca Sugar’s second song of the series. This helps make the ending even sadder. Susan tries a marshmallow and falls in love with candy. I can only imagine the gross scraps Susan has been eating underground. 

Finn and Jake bring Susan Strong to the Candy Kingdom and we see the end of her meeting with Bubblegum. Hopefully PB was less awkward this time! She probably geeked out seeing a survivor of an ancient civilization. Susan sees Peppermint Butler and tries to eat him, showing she wasn’t quite ready to be around others. Finn feeds her sidewalk brittle instead. It looks delicious, but it is the ground so that’s kind of gross. Susan is basically living out a fan’s dream of getting to go to the Candy Kingdom and eating it. She runs off to get the rest of her tribe so they can eat the entire kingdom. This can be taken as a metaphor for the destructive nature of human consumption. She misunderstands and thinks they just can’t eat Peppermint Butler. It’s very weird that Finn and Jake don’t just run after her and tell her not to. 

Finn of course doesn’t want to hurt his people, but he still tells Princess Bubblegum. They make a plan to scare them away without actually hurting them. Princess Bubblegum gathers her people and dresses them in spooky Halloween-like costumes. Starchy’s beelzebub costume is fitting for the gravedigger. Jake wants to give him candy, which is a cute wink at Halloween without actually mentioning a holiday that doesn’t exist anymore. PB definitely has the security and capabilities to easily hold them off, but this was before the series really explored the extent of Bubblegum’s power. Maybe she feels for Finn and doesn’t want to hurt them, but I’m sure she has better means of repelling them safely. Even Jake could use his powers to help.

They try to use giant shadows to scare them off, but Finn taught Susan too well. Finn does go to try to talk to them, but the marshmallow kids run out to fight them off after Jake accidentally lights them on fire. I do think the conflict is a little bit contrived, Finn could have just tried to go talk to them before they get to the kingdom, but it’s not a big deal. The hyomoons’ hats catch on fire so they rip them off, revealing fish heads. Their ancestors were definitely human but they mutated overtime. Susan does not rip her hat off (although her hair should be a clue). Finn asks Susan what she is and she looks at him briefly before running away. This is one of the most heartbreaking moments in the series so far. While Finn isn’t able to bring the human race back to Ooo yet, he eventually will succeed. Jake says that everyone is a wild animal and Finn refers to Jake as his brother. This shows that even if Finn is the last human, he still has family and he isn't truly alone as everyone is really the same deep down. Humans can be just as selfish and savage as any animal. The episode ends with Finn still not sure if Susan is human or not, leaving us with the most mysterious ending yet. 

This is the most emotional episode of the series yet, except for arguably “It Came From the Nightosphere” and finally starts to give us some more hints of the backstory of the series. We explore a deeper layer of Finn we haven’t gotten to see before. Susan Strong is a very mysterious character that fans would obsess over and theorize about for the next two years.

Grade: A

[fangsandfeels]

Since I gave Calliper such a disaster of a childhood and social life, coming up with Guardians for her was quite a chore.

I literally had to ask myself: "If I was a tone-deaf mind flayer, digging through the memories of a half-drow with huge self-esteem issues, slavery trauma, deep mistrust for drow, and a general feeling of inadequacy because of her origin...what image should I come up with to gain her trust?"

Option # 1. Personal high elf hero with a shining tadpole

Since Calliper hates drow, who is the opposite of drow? High elves, of course. Graceful and benevolent beings, sun-kissed folk attuned to Fey and wonderful magic, such a stark contrast with spiders, webs, and darkness of the Underdark. Oh, but they are so untouchable, aren't they? So distant. What are the chances of meeting one? Of having such an elf treat her like someone equal, worthy of respect, deserving mentoring and protection? Wouldn't it be wonderful? Doesn't Calliper secretly seek to be accepted at least by someone of her kin, especially those so viciously hated by drow? Wouldn't she trust such a guardian, who came to her when she needed him the most, with her life?

(Spoiler: not really. Calliper has met a few High Elves in her life, and all she got was raised eyebrows, side eyes, and mixed looks of pity. To her, they truly were something distant - while she didn't explicitly hate them, she always felt there was no point in connecting with them. They would never understand. So, while the presence of a handsome and mysterious elven knight, straight from heroic tales, would have been a huge relief in her condition, and it felt nice to be acknowledged and cared for, Calliper has never exactly dreamt about such a hero - and at that point, she gave up trying to impress non-drow Tel`Quessir, so she would treat his offers with suspicion)

Option # 2. "I'm just like you!...No, seriously, I'm literally the male version of you"

Yes, no drow allowed in Calliper's headspace...but what about a fellow half-blood? Finally, someone, who looks like her, who had been through same shit as her and who understands her fears, and concerns - and is there to protect her because he know her struggles and wants to make it better. Together, they can make it through this nightmare. She doesn't have to be alone. She doesn't have to be afraid. Now, open your mind to this tadople, Calliper. Don't worry, you're not alone anymore. He will take care of you.

(This version works better with tugging at Calliper's strings. Her need for belonging at least somewhere shows. While the odds of two half-drows finding each other in ther weirdest of circumstances are sus, just too good to be true, the prospect of finding a kindred soul may have Calliper acting unwise. On the other hand, the experience with her patron taught her that she better not act unwise in her dreams and visions -- it didn't take much for her to accidentally attach herself to the forces beyond her and everyone else's comprehension. She doesn't want to repeat that. Also, if he is half-drow like her, doesn't he know how dangerous tadpoles are? Why would he want her to insert more of these things into her brain?)

Option # 3. "Mother knows best"

The Emperor's cruelest and the most fucked up way to get Calliper's trust and attention -- take a dive into her most vulnerable memories and hopes, and carve them into an avatar for himself. Because even though Calliper tries not to reflect on the obstacles of her birth, she never really stopped asking herself "What if...?". What if her mother never ended up a slave in the Underdark, never went through all of this? What if she, Calliper, was a normal girl, a welcome child, born in a loving union, somewhere under the sun? What if she was born in the world where her mother wanted her?

How would she look like? How would she sound like? How hugging her would feel like? How would it feel to have someone caring and supportive, proud of her and there for her?...

She doesn't even remember the face of the woman who was her mother. Only fragments, none of them happy or pleasant. She knows that she had to be human and that she hated her. And Calliper didn't blame her. She could care less about what happened to her biological father (hopefully, he met his brutal death, got eaten alive, and shat out by a bulette). Still, the thought of having all these powers and being unable to find and wrestle just one more person from the darkness of the Underdark and take her home kept her awake at night more than once.

And then, there it is...an oddly familiar face. A protective touch. A kind smile. Calm, motherly demeanor. Calliper has never met this woman before, yet she radiates comfort and safety. How natural would it feel to trust her? To follow her advice? To hug her as she hides her pain and exhaustion from constantly shielding them from harm?

(I hate myself for coming up with this idea. This is so fucking unfair. It's manipulation at its vilest, and it would have worked. It would have convinced Calliper to consume another tadpole at least once. And, of course, she would be ruined after learning about the deception. Fucking devastated. She'll put two and two together, realize what the Emperor did and have a mental breakdown.)

[deansmom]

The characters I love are the ones who are the heroes, but don’t believe that they are. The ones who people don’t always like, they don’t always like themselves, they don’t always do the right thing or save the day - but they always try. Because at the core of who they are, whether they want to acknowledge it or not, is a good person.

Dean Winchester spends the entire show thinking that he’s poison, his existence in the storyline is the problem, that most people think he’s the bad guy, and he still tries. He still tries to do what’s right. Does he fuck up? Obviously, he’s a person who is alive, but he still gets up, and tries again. He looks in the mirror and sees the worst version of himself, sees the worst things he’s ever done and none of the amazing things, and is still like “fuck you, I’m going to try, because that’s what people do. They try to help. They try to be better.”

Bucky Barnes is, as far as he’s concerned, always going to be the bad guy. He’s got too much blood on his hands, too much red in is ledger to be anything else, but he tries to be better, even still. Because that’s what you do. If you can help people? You do it. Regardless. Not because he thinks he’s a good person, but because in his world, that’s what you do. You help where you can. “Do no harm, but take no shit” is his motto. Nobody would’ve blamed him for walking away from the Avengers. Nobody would’ve blamed him for retiring. He gave so much of himself against his will, and he still chose to continue fighting.

Buffy Summers knows she’s the hero of the story, but she spends most of the show feeling like she isn’t. Feeling like she might even be the bad guy, that like hey, maybe if I’m out of the picture, bad things won’t happen. And then as the show evolves, she gets more life experience and trauma, she realizes that she can’t and shouldn’t always be the hero. She knows she isn’t likable. But she still shows up, she still fights, and she’s willing to die for the people who don’t like her, because that’s what you do. She goes through the teenage phase of “well I’m not going to help you because you suck” and then realizes very quickly, it doesn’t matter if they suck, because she can help. And she wants to be the good guy that people think she is, even if she doesn’t think she deserves it.

Carol Danvers is the epitome of “I was the bad guy for a while, so now I’m going to fix that.” But she knows that not everybody likes her. Not everybody wants to be saved by her. Some people still think she’s the bad guy, and she still makes the active choice to fight to protect those people too. Nobody would’ve blamed her if she walked away for a while. Nobody would’ve blamed her if she had said, “hey, I just went through this whole traumatic thing, and I need a minute to figure out how to deal with that… alone” - but she didn’t. She saved the world, because according to her, that’s what you do.

Natasha fucking Romanoff makes Bucky’s guilt complex look rational. She had her entire life stolen from her. She doesn’t even really know how old she is. She doesn’t even know if Natasha is the name her parents gave her, or the name the red room gave her. Everything that makes you a person was stolen from her when she was a child, and she became a fucking superhero. She was so concerned about the red in her ledger that she joined shield to become a good guy and start writing her wrongs. Not that she’d ever say it out loud, but she cared so painfully and deeply about everyone else, that she didn’t think twice about sacrificing herself so the rest of the world could get their people back. She just said “that’ll be enough, right? If I give myself, if I do this for everyone else, that will be enough” knowing full and damn well that the red in her ledger would never be able to be wiped clean, but damn it if she wasn’t going to fucking try to balance out those scales.

They can all be summed up as “I’ve done a lot of harm, and I’m not a good person, but I’m still going to help, because it’s the right thing to do.”