#but i guess i'm also putting under
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Octavius singlehandedly forcing me to label this as 'mature'
#the cowboy boots 👢 and hat stay ON during sex#Octavius sleeps naked actually#because i said so#anyway#night at the museum#natm#natm octavius#natm jedediah#jedediah smith#gaius octavius#jedediah and octavius#jedtavius#fanart#art#traditional art#btw there's nothing to see under the 'censor'. I just put it there for aesthetic reasons (and because I thought it was funny)#also they're not completely hairless (at least Octavius)#I'm just not good ar drawing body hair#Jed would definitely have leg hair. I stand by this. Oct would have chest hair instead. thanks for coming to my ted talk#artistic nudity#lowkey tho#not really suggestive but I guess it depends on who you ask#mildly suggestive
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sorry but saying that the accessibility needs of mentally disabled people are just preferences or about "comfort" is blatantly incorrect. if i can't enter a building because the bright lights and loud noises would send me into a meltdown, then i can't enter the building, and that's not less important than me not being able to enter a building because it's not wheelchair accessible. if you genuinely think that mentally disabled people aren't really struggling, and that it's okay to mock their very real concerns, then that just shows that you've been refusing to listen to their experiences. do better or shut the fuck up.
#yeah yeah i know i said i wouldn't post about this stupid fucking 'discourse' anymore#but i keep seeing takes that make my blood boil#physical and mental disabilities are two sides of the same coin! yes there are differences but also a lot of commonalities#but nooooo expecting people to have even an ounce of fucking compassion for those who dont share their exact lived experience#is too much to ask for i guess#i've said this many times before but gatekeeping and infighting will get us nowhere#throwing your fellow disabled people under the bus won't help you#i get people's anger - i have a lot of anger too as someone who is housebound with a physical disability#but other disabled people arent your enemy#and taking your anger out on them is just a dick move#especially if you do so using the same ableist 'its all in your head' rhetoric#that mentally disabled people have had to put up with since forever#disclaimer: obviously not all physically disabled people act like that. from what i can tell its just a small (but very vocal) minority#but it's pervasive enough to make me wary of online spaces for physical disabilities#which is kinda sad seeing as i have a physical disability myself and would love to connect with others#but i'm not super keen on being told that my autism (which has significantly impacted me my whole life) doesn't matter
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currently at That Point which occurs once every few months where one briefly begins pacing around the house teary eyed contemplating selling their own organs or becoming an online scammer or getting on anxiety meds so you can bear the risk taking required to be a hitman or so on and so forth.... why must everything so Expensive... Surely all would be healed in life if only I had one big plate of lasagna and a simple loan of $40,000 ... auoughhh....
#And then you just eventually shrug and go 'welp. nothing i can do i guess' and sad cartoon music plays as you shuffle back to your room#It's just hard with my specific physical and mental issues since it's like.. I couldn't really handle most jobs. I can't handle school. I'm#100% aromantic and asexual so I'll never get married so I can't get money that way. I have too much issues with social cues#+ too nervous temperament + too low energy to put effort into lying and having a fake relationship just for money. so on and so forth etc.#Really I should have just been born into a middle class family. Which I guess everyone says. but ESPECIALLY considering my#chronic conditions kind of hampering my ability to function 'normally' or be Independent in a regular way. I'm always going to be#in some way sort of beholden to the whims of people around me who I must depend on. so... well of course they might as well have been rich#lol like that would have been better for me of course.#AAANyway... Just thinking about another stupid fucking climate change summer... months keep going by so fast.. soon it will be so again#And it's like such SMALL things would make drastic improvements for me. Literally if I just had a place with central AC#then like 75% of my issues with summer would vanish instantly. literally. But instead it's like.. having a cheap hot apartment + only#half functional dinky window ac + my illnesses that make me heat sensitive + living in a part of the country that keeps getting hotter +#inability to leave the house much meaning I can't just go spend time in a cooler place etc. all factors which combine together to make#it just utterly miserable for MONTHS and mentally draining. And literally ALL I would need to fix that is just...#have a place with central AC that works.. (or move to a colder country/area but that also takes money. Or just not have illnesses#that make me heat sensitive. but that I can't control). etc. etc. I guess it's just the nature of the constant background frustration of#being part of The Masses under our current manifestation of unmitigated capitalism. Such minor details would make such huge#quality of life improvements and yet will remain ever out of reach. ONE little thing could change your whole life but you can't even have#that. so many 'If only' scenarios. etc. And of course obviously I am incredibly thankful just to have anywhere to live at all. food to eat#. any sort of stability whatsoever no matter how fragile it feels/is. But that still doesn't make it not frustrating occasionally to look#around and see how relatively little would have to change in order for you to be a decent percentage more comfortable and yet#how still far away even those ''small'' seeming goals are. etc. etc.#Seriously think I've been traumatized by the summer or something somehow lol like thinking about it being warm weather eventually#makes me nauseous with panic. It's just SOOO much labor. micromanaging windows and fans and blocking every ounce of light#and not being able to cook (cant even afford a single degree of temp increase due to the stove) for months and barely being able#to sleep for months and the claustrophobia of days on end crawling out of your skin because it doesnt even get cool enough at#night to offer relief so you're just always feeling trapped.. hgrhh...#It starts getting hot here sometimes in May but mostly June then lasts through October now.. thats like half the year almost.. ARghhH#anyway... If any extremely rich person reading this would like to buy me an air conditioned house in exchange for multiple years worth#of art (I will paint murals on all of your grand dining halls and make all the custom sculptures you could ever want etc) then.. hewwo :'3c
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Hazing (Patreon)
#Doodles#SCII#The Captain#DAX#Who's hazing who? Yes :)#I'd like to say this is early on in their relationship but let's be honest they'd take the opportunity to rib each other at any point lol#Hehe I had fun with DAX's eye and tendril expressions in this one ♪#I mean I have a lot lately with the curls and swirls and thick lines and shapes and fully-up and angry hehehe ♪ It's all fun!#But these were especially fun hehe#Still yet inspired by WOY lol - believe me I was least of all expecting to be hit this hard but I'm not about to complain lol#I still can't get over the fact that DAX and Peepers are both Commanders who are in love with their superior and have beef with a Captain#Hilarious ♥ Love that for them ♪♫#But yes! Captain Tim was what inspired these! Lol ♪ The fact that Peepers is 3rd in command to a pet is very funny haha#And obviously it doesn't quite transfer over since the Captain is y'know - a human and DAX is ranked under ZEX specifically#I guess if you really wanted to get into it the Captain could be bragging about sleeping with ZEX but that seems even a little too mean#And also would he be so brazen about that to DAX - would he even know? I guess it Really depends on when this is lol#I do love DAX's subtle rudeness hehe ♪ He puts up with you Captain and that's about it#I had a lot of fun with his pained/freaked out expression as well haha#I also forget if I've talked about my headcanon about VUX strength? :0 I feel like I have but I have no idea where lol#I also don't remember where I got the inclination from but at some point my mind settled on the thought that VUX arms are weaker than human#At least pound-for-pound - but their strength comes from their specificity :D That their grip strength is much more evenly spread!#I mean humans have what our hands so fingers - and our arms - we can grab and hold but they can /coil/#So holding a human in an arm lock like that would be hard to break especially if he held onto the Captain's shoulder or lifted :3c#Why are you picking fights person-to-person Captain don't you have a ship and crew to pilot right about now lol#Goes and tattles to ZEX maybe hehe ♪ Fair's fair!
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new character page wip
#i edited the shit out of this code ngl#idk what i'm gonna put under the music section yet#the picture is just a place holder#i definitely like this layout better. not looking forward to having to do new pictures of everyone. again.#i'm also rewriting everyone's bios. again. bc i want them to reflect their current selves more#rn they're like a weird mix of their canon & post-canon selves & they just don't feel very. cohesive. ig#like. most of my edits take place in post-canon so i think their pages should match that?#they're not accurate to the versions of them that i share on here. that's what i mean#mm i just confused myself trying to think about it#ok. i'm gonna go have lunch & then i guess i'll write or something#i had something else i was gonna say but i forgot lol#rainyrambles
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yagami, WHY do you have to be such a bitch around kuwana. i'm going to strangle you.
(P.S.: he didn't tell kuwana that tesso said not to feel bad about it. obviously.)
#kuwagami#judge eyes#nah the best thing here is that yagami fucking KNOWS already that kuwana is not a piece of shit#he can admit to other people that yeah kuwana really cares about people. he knows that kuwana probably feels bad AND he is correct about it#and when he. when he fucking. SEES him. he starts being a bitch. amazing.#yagami stop being a little hater challenge FAILED!!!#damn you know we all see that kuwana annoys yagami out of spite and while it CAN be true under some circumstances>#(like. trying to weasle his way into yagami's investigation. you know. and the flirting. obviously.)#but as i see it yagami is no better. his default state is being a bitch so of course he is bitchy to kuwana as well#but he can't switch it off and just. acts so immature that kuwana has no other option than to do the same#guess who's having more common sense out of these two actually. the answer may shock you#anyway if you're interested why my fics are being written so slow it's because i'm picking apart canon events to see if i missed something#uhm I GUESS!#this one i've thought about for a while but it's now relevant for the update so i came back here and just. just had to post it you know.#also yeah i kinda dug my own grave with picking yagami's disguise here because i haven't stopped laughing until he took it off#“no kuwana of course i made sure rk wouldn't know it's me i had THE BEST disguise even my friends wouldn't know it's me”#though who's kuwana to judge. he just changed his jacket and went eehhh good enough#these two idiots deserve each other. fucking hate them#putting letters together one word at a time
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(genderly) chill as hell if i was only ever glimpsed / detected like this
#Shrouded In A Rectangle neither sleeves nor an open front to be besieged with? yes#just doing whatever else like doesn't matter. tee cargo shorts which is my best guess rn of my ideal outfit. + sandals Absolutely#unfortunately my hair could never do that. somehow neither am i yet like forties fifties? have i not been at this for eons?#i Can be like uh let's just nobody talk to me i'm busy pensively perceiving truths that you don't ever actually wanna hear about#just the other day it was like hey....a [way Having To Talk could be a difficulty / problem] was under my nose in this lifelong pattern#certainly noticing the Verbal Exchange Demand heaped upon burnout as like [delay delay delay struggle weariness stress]#but also who knows like spent plenty of time just probably indeed Not having to have such exchanges while burned out. not noting them#anyway like this isn't even [dysphoric Ideal Outfit until i could [whatever supposed even more ideal than that gender euphoria]]#though shoutout to that but like nah get shrouded anyway. the only [how do i look] im motivated to consider is: when it's a costume#when it's just me it's like. i guess whatever pants and a comfortable enough tee. need glasses. hair's w/e so cut quite short ig#might accessorize w/things that are fun to me like hey yeah yknow i might want a calculator watch#[yea as a kid it was like :( im actively appreciating the animals supposedly Gross or Bad] if i had hated little friends Sure yaay#if i had disorienting light effects like a pelagic creature. but you don't even need that. like hey i'm nd in real life. i got it#chat i'm in the walls too bestie lmao. if only my bigfoot pose reference Step was this good#tl;dr long rephrasing of my being like; now the gender slay....#& nodding & Noting when [worksheet exercise: what's your gender euphoria look?] is like shrug idk. but this is serving maximally to me; so#going Chat how can i up my uncanny stats. looking up ''isn't it like Uncanny knowledge e.g. so like why not....canny''#but i think the un canny is the Uncanniness Accuser's perspective. not of My ken. your literal weird one maybe#so again apt to be like jk i'm just autistic & shit; i got it....horror shit challenge impossible: Don't have sm typical mundane#[disability moment] as like Unsettling danger/malice cues. challenge impossible; again#subverted here like as [horror holding hands touching foreheads w/comedy] w/o Rescinding just casual disabled behavior/qualities#just remembered like three witches weird sisters etc macbeth. weird uncanny soothsaying gendering. word#anyway i should be shrouded (made no any connection whenever i put the blanket now over my head & shoulders in place min ago)#perhaps the real Ideal Look insight: i do not have any way i wish to be observed by people. secret passages / removed room anytime
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#metagross#bonus angle under the cut because i didn't even know this thing had a mouth#TPC knew when they named this thing… they even put “meta” in its name…#i always used to pronounce this “meta–grahhss.” but i've also been told multiple times that it's “meta-grohhss.” don't like that#like the word “gross.” they're not gross..! they're strong competitively or whatever..! yeah this is never a pokémon i cared about#some folks only care about pokémon for their competitive viability but that just is not a factor for me when determining pokémon i like#i do like how the X on their face goes over their eyes to make them look angry from practically every angle. i think that's a nice touch#and steel/psychic is rather cool. but i still don't know what this thing is supposed to be. though again i guess there's something to be#said for a pokémon that isn't necessarily Based off anything and is just its own creature. i think there's gotta be at least a few of those#out there‚ innit? i thought the trapinch line was but. lo and behold i guess. maybe they're all based off something and i'm just wrong
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it's genuinely so funny how he's all covered up EXCEPT for the abs
#sir do you want ash's hand there when you kiss that badly???#cover up a little! what if you get hurt? actually... heh. no. don't cover up <3 i like seeing this#ash rambles 💚#my desert flower 🥀#i miss him#but also my s/i for this game is SUCH a banger#badass warrior who lives in the desert and is like a robinhood type for the kids in the lower levels of town!#she's even referred to as dalmasca's flame! a symbol of freedom for the town. someone who refuses to live under the rule of the empire#she even spits on the guard that arrests her when you first meet her akdhajs because her first meeting with the player is in jail#she's so fucking cool ajdhqjdjs no wonder b.asch fell for her! her outfit is also comprised of pretty dark colors akdhsjdh#i think I've described her in the past as my indian roots meet cool desert warrior meet A.rdeth B.ay#also irl i straighten my curly hair and many of my s/is do but not this one! she has the poof! she has it braided though but still#anyways#B.asch... ahdhjkadhjwk.. i have a thing for knights akdjqjs him and ash have a lot of time to make up for what with him being in jail#this post went completely off the rails akdhajsh i was gonna talk about his stupid ass outfit#cut me some slack though it's almost 3am#oh and for my pals that actually keep up with my ash life updates that are usually in gush posts..#I DID FINISH THAT PAPER!!! WITH HALF AN HOUR TO SPARE!!!! i personally thought i kind of ate but. we'll see what my professor has to say!#maybe some B.asch cuddles would be nice.. snuggling into him.. so big and strong..#ash is always happy seeing him gain more weight and muscle. he looked uh... horrible after he got out of prison. bad.#i mean the beard was pretty hot and I'm secretly praying he brings it back but you get my point ajdjksdhsj#not like they'd feel the guy who 'killed the king'#laying by his side is so comforting. i feel so safe with him. it's funny how he defends Princess A.she and also has an Ash too! two of them!#ohh and his voice.. it's so nice.. I'm starting to get sleepy.. guess he's all i needed to help me fall asleep#hehe.. my knight.. my beautiful knight#i will still be putting my hand on his abs when we're smooching it out though. how can i not.#that's an ash hand sized hole#...#that's what she said#i meant *feed not feel.. I'll edit that typo when I'm on my laptop.. gn gamers ily
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me, the symptoms experiencer, experiencing symptoms: wow gee i wonder what the fuck is happening right now i have no context for why i could possibly feel bad, surely i'm not experiencing symptoms. me, when i figure out it's the symptoms:
#gif warning#medical stuff#man getting labled as a hypochondriac at a formative age (any) was a hell of a kick to the balls#i don't even have those#and yet#me when i've been told all my symptoms can't be real and that i was makign it up for attention so i started just not talking about them#even though in private without anyone around i was still experiencing the symptoms i decided i just Wasn't#because why would my parents be wrong about that - they loved me right?#so if something was concerning they'd be worried if it was a real thing - i wasn't making it up but maybe i was#no one should have taught my father the term psychosomatic#he's the reason it's had to go up on the shelf#mom flat out telling me it was impossible that [redacted] because i was quote ''too young'' for it to be happening#so now i'm old and it's a Real Big Fucking Deal I guess#i'm experiencing the flare/crash i was anticipating and - thank fuck - my brain isn't going down the tubes with it#which is a fucking miracle because this is the lead up to my period and *normally* that's when the PMDD hits real fucking bad#but in a stroke of luck (???) my body decided it was just going to smash itself into the ground Krillin-style#and as i lay here in the crater of my own body's making i'm just like. well at least i don't want to die#which is truly the most throwing thing of everything actually#anyway....#got hEDS put on my medical file for reals though so like#that's in there#that exists#also the look of HORROR on the nurse tech's face when i showed how much distance my hips spread *every month* for my period#i'm LITERALLY going into labor monthly and i've been doing that since i was 11#no fucking WONDER my body has collapsed out from under me if we even just go by that fucking metric like godDAMN#ugh anyway.... i'm. this was NOT the stuff i wanted to focus on this year for personal growth and healing but we're doing it now i guess!#fuck! goddamn! piss in a cup#i have also... failed to do the task i was meant to today and technically there's still time but it's uh. i. i'm gonna need to ask for help#and i HATE asking for help especiallywhen i need it most#another thing my parents have to answer for when they greet whatever judge they find at the end of their lives
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I need to remember a very specific, haunting scent to describe how my wife smells like and I knoooow it's buried somewhere deep inside my brain, in a place of forsaken memories which I don't (want to) have access to.
Unless I walk into a church. But, well,, uhhhh.... *comically loud gulp*
#y'all might understand under what kind of pressure I am lmao#I'm gonna be a little vulnerable for a moment here. i guess.#i wouldn't want to inadvertently unlock other stuff as well. i know what's in there.#it wouldn't be... pleasant. to put it very very very VERY lightly.#but I'll do it. for my wife. she's worth it <3c#also i might discover something new about myself. who knows!#I'll keep y'all updated as soon as i find a church i feel safe to go to#since I ain't going to the one near the place i live in. no fucking way.#oh well. wish me luck besties.#how do i even tag this? religious truma?? man... fuck.#echoes from the fog
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Yuri's dialogue (JP) is so fascinating to study, like... the repetitive use of certain words/phrases that others use sparingly but he uses constantly. the way it feels like his vocabulary is more expansive than what he uses, but he defaults to a "comfort" level of speech. the way it mixes in with his sort of "street talk" words and the sheer level of informality. the way his "street talk" phrasing is contrasted by the tone of his voice (on that note, people I know who also know JP are also very endeared by these aspects of him so I KNOW IT'S NOT JUST ME!!!).
'cause the thing is, he uses phrases that yeah, other people do use, but he uses a handful over and over and over (contrast to other characters' sparing use of repetition). it's actually... really refreshing? it sounds more relatable and less "video game/anime/JRPG/RPG" writing or something, idk. like closer to how a real person would speak.
I do my best in my translations not to make things sound too stiff across the board, but Yuri makes it so easy. it's why I'm so interested in translating all his lines in Vesperia, like... the actual, original tone for him with his original wording because it's smth Eng only players don't get to experience ('cause even if you listen with JP audio, if you don't know the language, ofc you're gonna miss out on context. it's nobody's fault for not knowing, just... they unfortunately miss out). the thing is, there are a lot of times when the lines in and of themselves are not contextually incorrect in the English ver (usually the situation for smaller scenes, because they altered the text outright for more important stuff which was the stuff that originally set me off, but there were also plenty of cases of just vocal tone shifting with the correct context that still gave off the wrong impression), but Yuri's tone is shifted away from the original in Eng even though it's completely and perfectly translatable.
I am by no means about to translate the entire game because let's face it, I really don't care that much for Vesperia on the whole. I'm kinda stuck with it because Yuri's there lo and behold I actually am WAY more engaged in his stories in Rays, Link and Asteria because it's an amazing character put into circumstances where he actually gets to shine and feels more alive, which Vesperia did not provide nearly as well with its very disjointed story. also, Tales gachas have banger stories that are arguably better than the mainline games, and they regularly make Yuri a very central character to the gachas. Crestoria was also about to do it until they pulled the plug on that game and I'm pretty confident something interesting has been lost to the world. also I just generally don't have the energy or motivation to do that, so... I'll only be focusing on Yuri's lines, especially because his stuff is where the bulk of the messing around was. he's just insanely fun to translate for and I love burying myself head first into his speech.
will I actually finish this project? dunno. will I get around to posting it? whatever I get done (so all of it if I complete it), and if I decide to call it quits then I'll post what I have at the time I decide that. will it take a long time? probably, but I can always mention stuff along the way...
#GTF Vesperia Things#GTF Yuri Things#also the more I comb the script the more I properly notice all the uh... very awkward loc changes in smaller sentences in smaller scenes#like things that change the understanding of a sentence. or in Yuri's case just... the usual annoying personality shifting#noticing lots more stuff than when I did those big posts bc I was less focused on the tiny stuff/not side by side comparing#like a lot of this stuff is plot irrelevant and I knew it was littered around but I'm just getting#a bit more of a proper feel for it and how often it's there while studying Yuri's speech under a microscope bc I like observing him fkjhsjg#the fact that they're extremely largely consistent in tampering with Yuri's verbal (not just vocal) tone still has me LIKE.#but I'm fighting to ignore it so I can study my precious boy for reasons unknown beyond hyperfixation#also with Link I was actually mad at first bc they totally dropped the ball on Yuri's repetitive speech in arc 1. like it just wasn't there#there were plenty of times I noticed that normally he'd be SAYING those phrases but it just didn't happen where it should've#(like ''he'd def have said that here but it's not here'') Rays' main writer was not Vesperia's and she STILL got him down PERFECTLY#frankly I'd argue Rays' writing of Yuri is more correctly Yuri than Vesperia Yuri is which is oddly hilarious LOL#but mainly more that arc 2 Yuri is fucking WONKY sometimes but god knows most of my friends who know JP don't like that writer for#various reasons. somehow he pulled out that banger of a novel but arc 2 forget it. but yeah Rays just... really encapsulated YURI himself#the dialogue for him is spot on. not that Link and Asteria flunked with him bc they didn't#it's just that I think Rays and Miyajima gave the best quality of him bc the circumstances let him be more expressive#that said back to Link arc 2 did actually fix the speech issue so I don't know if they had different writers between arcs or just#realized they forgot to include those points of his character in arc 1 bc I know it wasn't the Link loc's fault#bc Yuri had full JP audio and I could hear that they just didn't have those things#but LORD the ACTUAL RELIEF that flooded me when arc 2 brought that shit back LMAOOOO#but yeah as far as Yuri goes he's absolutely fascinating and unique and he shines so bright in the gachas#it makes me really really sad that his home game is one I don't have much interest in#and that it's one that a lot of ppl feel the writing was wonky for (bc it was)#but I'm eternally grateful the gachas gave him opportunities to really shine as a character in great settings#bc it's not that he doesn't shine in Vesp itself. it's that the circumstances don't rly... allow him to be like PROPERLY unrestrained ig?#idk it's hard to explain. just. he was more. WHOOSH. I guess. in the gachas. yeah. like that. or smth. :')#sorta like. amazing character but not the best circumstances for him to show his true potential which I think he does in the gachas#bc the gachas have such great stories and scenarios and he's put into them#ANYWAY TL;DR YURI'S SPEECH IS FASCINATING AND I LOVE HIM
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alright uhhhh here we go hahaha do you guys. um. do you guys wanna hear the thing I made. which is just my self insert praising my f/o through song. no pressure or anything
lyrics:
drift away in slumber's embrace falling into your grace guiding me, the pull of sleep keeps me in your company
and all I've known are warm reveries divinity within my dreams golden gaze did captivate me I'm yours eternally
lull me in a mindless embrace slumber take me away soft and strong, no need to wake a lovely ethereal place
when I had nothing left of me solace found me in my dreams carried me in tranquility beloved god of sleep
#did i really just. make an entire song about this#like the fucking cringelord I am#...also is this...blasphemous???#no really. genuine sleep-deprived question#because. this is not about the actual deity but rather one specific modern depiction of him#i mean i guess if i haven't come under fire for straight up selfshipping with him yet then i'm safe to do a song about it#anyway. ahaha. hahah. oh man.#alright I'm gonna get lost forever into the sun now byeeeee#my audio#I'm VERY afraid to put this in the main tags skjhdfKHDFG
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Recent random life images ~
#photo diary#1 - picture of flowers with a cool pattern on the petals. 2 - son baby boy son baby with his arm out in a way that almost looks like he's#taking a selfie or something lol. 3 - some tacos made like I think last summer but somehow I just refound the picture of it lol. 4&5 -#flower with a really cool structure! Like how it's made of these little tiers of smaller flowers going up in a cyllinder type shape but fro#afar just looks like one flower. 6 - the stem of a broccoli that I cut very thin and put small slices of green bean inside of?? I like#messing around with produce scraps sometimes. no idea why I took a picture of this like a year ago. I guess maybe it kind of looks like#a spine or something interesting? 7 - a frozen icy bush from last year. The ice was like an inch thick layered on everything#8 - I just like the term useage here 'Storage under shadow place' which sounds far more ominous than 'keep out of direct sunlight' or whate#ver it probably meant to say lol. 9 - sometimes I get these notifications and they always make me weirdly whimsical feeling like..#imagining a life where I'm a retired elerly person in a quaint little home and I just get up and read the newspaper and play solitaire#and garden and then sleep. no large aspirations. no war. no climate change. just some little alternate reality where all is well#and you have your little cards and your little routine and etc. But rather than evoking a negative like 'grr i'll never have that ToT' sort#of feeling it's more just like. 'ah. a nice glimpse of an alternate reality. perhaps one day microsoft solitaire. perhaps one day.#*calm sigh*' lol. 10 - solitaire board with a lasagna theme. 11 - stil... trying to write... aughh..................#11 - The 'mist' icon for the weather looks really cool? I've never seen it before as I guess I've never seen misty weather. I only ever se#'fog' listed. I like the mist being these little squiggles with dots between? lol. 12 - random boring image but I thought the way my hair#happened to be laying when I looked down seemed kind of artistic-y like the even swoopy little swirl bit at the end looks like#how people often Draw Hair in pictures and etc I guess. 13 - SKY picture.. sky.. clouds.. of course.. always#anyway.. grhgh.. have been very barely online recently due to stress and so on. There's just So Many Things always lol...#It's still very hard for me to balance the fact that I need to be focusing just on my projects. yet also I'msupposed to be posting about#my projects.. Those are just such two entirely seperate worlds to me? a Good And Successful Artist would be marketing and posting#always promoting everything they're doing. But I have such more of a sense of like.. when I am being productive I am in my Isolation Cave#. Goign out to contact the real world and talk about the goingson within my Isolation Cave then breaks my focus lol. It's like just SO hard#to do both at the same time so I never do. grggg... Anyway.. also still working on the friend quiz thing. and sculptures. and I had#done a few commissions for people recently. and dr appointments.. and Existence. and watching geese out the window
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Yeah of course I’m still thinking about plushies, what else (Patreon)
Most specifically thinking about magnets again - there’s the obvious of putting it in their hands so they can hold hands!
Of course if they’re on the same side i.e. right hand gets south polarity, left gets north, they’d only be able to hold opposite hands, so no handshakes (but I think that’s fine personally haha)
But on top of hands they could also have magnets behind their mouth! Kiss-magnets! My only real concern is the fabric pulling and developing kiss-wrinkles from being pressed against each other haha
They’d also be able to giggle with their palms to their mouths hehe, how cute! It’d depend on their kiss polarity
Which would of course depend on ship compatibility! Max has to be able to kiss Dex and Caleb, so if that makes it that Caleb and Dex can’t kiss, I mean that’s just an unfortunate side effect haha
#Doodles#SCII#Helix#Max Vyer#Dexter Favin#ZEX#And kinda-sorta Caleb under the cut - mostly construction speculations#Gah I want themst as plushies so baaaad#Baby steps thataway - I'm still unsure with the fabric I'm using but everything testing! Every little step forward!#Just the thought of getting to play with them hehe ♪#Also personally-funny haha - that black shirt has a gold zipper pocket on the front so it's a little like VUX medals to me hehe#Fun fun#I'll get to play with them eventually!!! I will!#Until then the speculations are still enjoyable :) About the different accessories to have on offer hehe#Since they'd have static faces what would be a good way to imply sleepies? Too scary to be tucked in with wide eyes lol#A sleep mask makes him look sleepy <3 I wonder what his PJs are like :0 Even when I drew him wandering around at night#I still defaulted to his usual shirt style but I've seen him in a T shirt! :0 Comfy cozy#Guess it depends on the season as well haha tho I imagine the Vyer estate has central air hmmm#Anyhow lol - poor ZEX! It'd be too easy to cover his plushie in stitches to denote Them and his MU and everything :')#I also like the idea of little velcro/magnetic accessories to attach to the face - so like he has the empty socket and a little patch aw#Would like very much to try dry-dying(?) his hair with the green tips as well - like putting that plush-blush on the cheeks but hair instead#It should be possible right!#Speculating hair shapes for Max - I think bangs embroidered right to the face are very cool! But I like the idea of flipping his bangs up#Not like Super long to give him an emo fringe or anything lol but just enough to cover like his upper lash line :)#Attachment parts are interesting for sure - almost gotta make like a wig-style design to go over his head! :0#But imagining the final version with him so cute and self-pleased and squishy and throwable haha <3 He's too cute!#All the stuff under the cut is fairly well-contained explained I think haha#Looks strange in a kind of x-ray breakdown but hopefully it'd be invisible once they're constructed! No weird pulling hopefully hopefully#Sure doesn't make polyships any easier sheesh - what if I want them all to kiss! What if I want them to kiss everyone!!!#Magnets and their binary polarity smh just gotta invent a dual-attraction haha
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every year spotify wrapped just confuses the hell out of me. what is "pov: indie" (why not just indie????) what is "alt z." what the fuck is "hopebeat," is it like "indie poptimism." and where is provo
#i'm always surprised by tswift's ability to worm her way up there esp since i find midnights soooo blah#but she does have a lot of music and i've listened to a lot of it over the years so i guess it adds up in my liked playlist#also surprised by goose house bc like. they broke up like five fucking years ago lmao. how#johnny still uses the label but he's not putting anything new on spotify under the label...#i loved tessa violet's new album and played the shit out of it so her making it up there is not a shock#and revo and maisie peters remain unstoppable every year#top 1% maisie peters fan lol. what does that say about me (i like catchy breakup bops and she sings in my key?)#also griff clawing vertigo up there despite it only releasing in last couple months damn#i did love vertigo though. i did. and i always love fast car#plus i get national parks and jukebox the ghost mixed up allll the time so them being grouped together is funny#anyway yeah i don't know anything about artists genuinely#i just listen to what i like and do whatever#my extended relative has a family spotify plan they put me on as a present since they had a free slot... so it's free for me haha#txt
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