#but i dunno 😱

[netegf]

i'm like 8 million years late to this bc i finally got around to watching obx3 a month ago lmfao but what is the consensus on rafe and sofia !! 🤭

[vaniloqu3nce]

what? she has problems? okay and i am a problem I can be one of hers

[pregduo]

I think eyeless jack has a tail and no one can tell me otherwise

[studbunniez]

shaming this person bc they wanted to be EXTREMELY OBTUSE in what I was saying and make it so much more complex than what I actually said but yea... any other nonlesbian that approaches my page with this shit is getting immediate blocked this is the ONLY ONE I'm responding to

[mariasont]

Imagine this for me, feel free to ignore this but it’s rotting in my brain 💀 some fluffy Fem!BAU reader x Aaron Hotchner pretty please 🙏🏻

Reader and another member of the team enter a suspected unsub’s house, working in biochemistry and bio weapons🧬🔬🧪, reader accidentally triggers some alarm/security system and gets sprayed w an unknown substance😱🤯

(anthrax for angst/hurt comfort, aphrodisiac for smut…..or for fluff like a laughing gas??)

n reader has to get checked out by medics n in the back of the ambulance or the hospital (in context of laughing gas) with extremely concerned Aaron, and miss girl cannot hold it together, cracking jokes, giggling at herself, Aaron and nothing in particular, BLATANTLY flirting with Aaron (who wouldn’t let’s be fr) n he’s tryna keep his professionalism so bad but cracks n says something she wasn’t supposed to hear, she replies with something along the lines of

“take me out on a date first, sir.”

The side effects lasting the entire flight back too so the whole team gets to witness reader all snuggled up to Aaron, complimenting him, pulling full on smiles out of him, making him blush- AAAAH pls I’m rattling the bars of my cage thinking about it

PLEASE 🫠🫠I’m hanging out for some tooth-rotting fluff, once again feel free to ignore,

Happy writing 💜💜

DANGEROUS - A.H

a/n: LOLOLOL i loved this request thank you so much i hope this is what you were wanting <3

masterlist

pairings: aaron hotchner x fem!reader

warnings: reader being persistent asf, home girl isn't backing down for NOTHING

wc: 1.3k

"Where is she?"

Hotch's words sliced through the sterile air of the ER, stripped of kindness or patience, devoid of his usual restraint. His presence seemed to consume the hallway, his tie loose, his brow drawn, and his composure unraveled in ways only you could cause.

Morgan intercepted him before he got too far.

"Hotch—cool it. She's okay." Hotch's glare could've sent anyone else running, but Morgan held his ground. "I get it. You're worried. But barging in there all hot-headed? Not gonna help."

"She's under observation," Morgan continued before Hotch could push past him. "Doc says whatever she got hit with isn't dangerous--just... weird. A little chemical happy hour, let's say. She's harmless and giggly."

Hotch's brows furrowed together, pushing past Morgan and opening the door to find you sprawled in the hospital bed.

The sight of you sent his heart into a freefall. Your cheeks were flushed, your hair was a mess, and your eyelids drooped like you'd been awake for hours—but you were alive. He scanned you quickly, searching for injuries, bruises, something tangible to explain why it still felt like the world had tilted off its axis. When he came up empty, a small weight lifted from his shoulders, but the tightness in his chest wouldn't let go.

"Hotch." Your voice, soft and a little slurred, tugged him out of his own head. You blinked up lazily up at him, a sleepy, crooked smile spreading across your lips. "Hey, you."

He frowned, his steps eating the distance between you. "How do you feel? What did the doctors say?"

You giggled—giggled. "I feel fantabulous, boss man. Why're you always so serious? It's kind of cute, though. You're cute."

"Cute?" He blinked, startled, as if the word was foreign coming from you. His brow creased in confusion, though his eyes betrayed the faintest trace of relief. "You're in a hospital bed because of a biochemical exposure. Nothing about this is remotely cute."

"Okay, okay, Captain Grumpy Pants." You patted the bed beside you, and for a moment he just stared. "Sit down before you pop a blood vessel."

"What did that chemical do to you?"

Your laughter bubbled up--bright, unrestrained, and completely inappropriate given the circumstances. "I dunno! But it's great. Like... fun. You should try it. Loosen up, Aaron!"

The casual drop of his first name hit him like a slap in the face, and you caught the split second of surprise before he could smother it. Grinning wider, you leaned forward, eyes twinkling like you'd discovered his Achilles' heel.

"You worried about me, Aaron? That's sweet. And for the record, you wear stress well. Very rugged. Broody Hotchner."

Hotch's jaw tensed visibly, a muscle jumping beneath his skin as he tried--and failed--not to react. He was sure he liked the sound of his name rolling off your tongue entirely more than was appropriate. "You're not making any sense."

"And you don't smile enough," you countered easily. "You've got this whole tall, dark, and scowly thing going on, but when you smile? Oh, man. Broody Hotchner becomes downright irresistible."

He stared at you, mouth slightly open like he'd forgotten how to respond. The blush that crept up his neck and toward his ears betrayed him, though he looked anywhere but at you.

"Rugged and speechless?" Your grin spread wider. "Oh, this is definitely my new favorite hobby."

He said your name, low and clipped--a warning and a plea all wrapped into one.

You waved him off, giggling as you propped your chin in your hand, the faintest smirk tugging at your lips. "Oh, lighten up. Admit it—you like me. I'm the best part of your day."

Before he could even form a reply, the door creaked open, and Emily stepped in. "She's cleared to go. The jet's ready. You'll have to wrangle her out of here, though."

Hotch straightened immediately, thankful for the interruption. You, on the other hand, poured dramatically. "Aww, we were just getting to the good part."

"Let's go," Hotch muttered, ignoring Emily's obvious smirk as he grabbed your bag from the chair and stepped closer to the bed. When you didn't move, he gave you a look--a look you were all too familiar with. "Up."

"Look at you. So polite," you teased, sliding your hands into his as he helped you sit upright. 

Hotch didn't answer, just looped an arm under yours as he coaxed you to your feet. You swayed for a second--just enough to make him grab your other elbow. His movements were careful--surprisingly gentle for someone with such sharp edges. "Easy."

"You're just so reliable." You were leaning into his side more than you probably needed to. "See this is why I think you like me."

"You can think whatever you want as long as you keep walking."

Emily grinned as the two of you passed. "Smooth, Hotch. Real smooth."

--

The low rumble of the jet engines filled the cabin, but Hotch wasn't hearing any of it. All of his attention was on you--curled up on the seats, hands waving animatedly as you grinned at your captive audience, chatting nonstop like a queen addressing her subjects. Morgan and Reid were clearly enjoying the show.

"No, no, Spencer, you're not hearing me." You sat up with exaggerated effort, poking Reid's arm as if to emphasize your point. "If you combined your brain with Derek's charm, you'd be unstoppable. A super-agent. Like, Avengers level."

Reid's face flushed immediately, and Morgan barked out a laugh. "See, I told you, Pretty Boy—everyone's gotta have a little charm."

"I'm plenty charming," Spencer grumbled, though the small, amused smile gave away how he really felt.

Hotch leaned back in his seat, hands folded tightly in his lap, but his focus never left you. He was beyond exhausted, the weight of the last few hours settling heavy in his bones, but still, he refused to tear his eyes away. It wasn't rational, but the thought of looking away--even for a second--felt like it might undo having you here, safe and whole.

You noticed. Of course you did.

The pout that appeared on your face was immediate. "Hotch! You're all the way over there. That's too far."

He blinked, his heart stumbling for just a moment, your tone cracking through his carefully constructed walls. "I'm fine where I am."

"But I'm not," you whined, shifting toward the edge of your seat and looking far too pleased with yourself. "C'mon, boss man. Sit with me."

Morgan leaned into Reid with a grin. "She's relentless, man."

Hotch shot Morgan a quick glare before standing, crossing the cabin with deliberate strides. He lowered himself stiffly onto the seat next to you, his posture straight as a board. "Happy now?"

"Mm-hmm," you hummed, sliding closer and resting your head on his shoulder with hesitation.

He started to say your name, but you cut him off with a content sigh. "You're warm. Did anyone ever tell you you're like a human space heater? Very cozy, Hotchner."

Hotch swallowed. "You need to rest."

"I am resting. You're just really nice to lean on." You tilted your head up, peaking at him with half-lidded eyes. "You're handsome too. Did I mention that already? Like...impossibly handsome. It's a little unfair."

He froze. Completely and utterly froze. His hands hovered awkwardly over his knees, unsure of where to go as you snuggled closer, completely oblivious to the predicament you were putting him in. He could feel the team watching--Morgan's smirk, Emily's barely contained laughter, even Reid's curious glances--but none of them dare to say a word.

He said your name once again, this time softer, but you were already gone, eyes slipping shut, breath evening out as you dozed off against him.

Professional. He needed to be professional. He repeated the word in his head like a mantra, but with you pressed so contentedly against him, it felt like a losing battle.

And then he caught it--your perfume. Soft, faintly floral, and as familiar to him as the sound of your voice. It was the same scent he'd picked up in stolen moments: when you walked by his desk, leaving a hint of it behind, or leaned over his shoulder during a briefing. He'd grown used to it, let it blur into the background like everything else about you he shouldn't notice.

But now? Now it was inescapable, a subtle, dizzying distraction that tugged at what little composure he had left.

His chest tightened as an irrational thought hit him--what it would be like to have this forever. To breathe in your scent every morning instead of just in passing. To have you against him not as a fleeting accident but as a choice. He had no business entertaining these thoughts--thoughts of how easy it would be to have you like this all the time.

And that? That was dangerous.

taglist: @readergf @edencherries @aurorsworld @princess76179 @malindacath @freyy253 @broadwaytraaaaash @sunfyyre @sleepysongbirdsings @trulycayla @crouchingapple @navia3000 @aaronlovesava @bakugocanstompme @pansexualhailstorm @averyhotchner @looking1016 @everythinglizzy @sky2nd @messylxve @alexxavicry @yaykeira @spencerssatchel @candyd1es @storiesofsvu @pleasantwitchgarden @kodzukenmaaa @hiireadstuff @dilflover-3 @spenciesslut @phoenix-le-danseur-de-pole @deadofnight0 @sabmichell @jstcln @just-here-to-read13 @c-losur3 @wondergal2001 @oliver-1270 @ssahotchbabe @savagemickey03 @justanotherbimboslxt @imoonkiss @estragos @khxna @mxriesss @de-duchess @raysmayhem-72 @piinksdoll @justyourusualash

join my taglist here!

[irishmammonagenda]

MC's magic going wrong 😱😰

or right depending on ur outlook on life ig

warnings: swearing, mentions of death (extremely brief and only notioned towards), physical affection

You hadn´t thought much of it at first when you got back to the human realm. Everything went back to normal. Or as normal as it could be.

Your mother and father sobbed when they saw you, stating how they though´t you were lying in a ditch somewhere in the stretching countryside. You´d lied, told them you were away on a residency based apprenticeship, that you were sorry for worrying them. Your siblings showed signs of worry you never thought they were able to feel for you. Thus you were being babied for a month or so.

That´s when it started.

At first, it was more corvids at the bird feeder in your garden than usual. Then it was stray cats. Then inexplicable black and white feathers dusting your clothing and hair.

Your mother smiled picking out the ivory feather from the confines of your unbrushed hair, "Oh! Your guardian angel´s been watching over you!" she says playfully, an old wives´ tale, nothing too serious.

You tense for a moment, before laughing with her. "Well I´ll take it as a good sign." Stupid old wives being the smartest people.

At first it was easy to brush off.

Then your father started getting lucky, he hadn't been one to gamble persay, putting a few coins in on a bet for the horse racing or the football was a regular occurrence, sometimes he won,sometimes he didn't. The difference of a few silvers, a share bag of sweets basically, made no real strain on your belts. But now, he was winning left right and center. Winning amounts that shouldnt be possible based on the amount he input.

Though, after you woke up to cats and corvids staring at you unblinkingly, in your room, with a few flies and insects on the walls, and your bedsheets covered in feathers and scales of all colours and sizes, enough was enough.

You were going to give those nerds a piece of your mind.

After shooing the animals out, (making sure to pet the cats), you picked up a lipstick, and channeled your pact magic before drawing a circle with various symbols on the floor,

You stilled, "Ah, shit. I dunno how to do this, i mean half of those symbols are angry faces and squiggles...." but ever the theatre nerd, you improved.

"I, MC, call upon the power of my pacts with the Avatars of Hell! and, using their power; a portal to the Devildom shall open for me!"

And a portal did open for you. Unfortunately, not to the best place. As you travelled through the time pocket you ended up stumbling once you made it to the other side, the stumble turnt into a tumble turnt into a fall. Unluckily for you, the thing you fell on was toned flesh and chuckling heartily, you were in Diavolo's lap.

"It's great of you to drop by MC!" He says, his massive hands pulling you further into his frame.

You cover your face with your hands, now noticing the various other nobles in the council room who are staring at their Prince, attempting to mask the fact their jaws are going to hit the floor.

Atleast the Brothers weren't there, but Barbatos' half polite smile half smirk and Diavolo whispering various playful musings of, "Did you miss me that much little human, we missed you too.", and "Summoning a portal illegally into the Demon Lord's castle and onto the Demon Princes lap...tututut." almost made the brothers seem like a mercy....

...almost.

You couldn't tell if this was a win or a lose.

[dudetorchkovsky]

I've updated my wardrobe a bit and decided to change my Anxiety's clothes, because I haven't worn that striped sweater for a long time

Anxiety is an early riser☀️

each person in the film had a unique world of mind, so I think my mind would be cozy and goblincore-style (?) Because...I'm like that myself heh

And there are also some references to me

for example, a salt lamp. I use it as a night light because I've been afraid to sleep in total darkness lately.

Actually, I was thinking of doing an ask of my emotions, but my first painting lessons are starting (in college) and I dunno if I will have enough time to draw these dudes(((

[yourlocal-edgelord]

HEEHEE EVEN MORE BATFAM AS ME AND MY FRIENDS part 5:

————————————————

Steph: Hey tim your a 10 but its on the PH scale

tim: …

————————————————

Jason: I dunno if im stupid or if i have bad luck but i suctioned a bottle cap to the inside of my mouth and it wont come out :(

Jason: It hurts

Dick: 😱

Jason: DONT ‘😱’ AT MY PAIN BITCH

————————————————

Tim: Hol up

*4 minutes later*

Damian: …

Tim: Just wanted to see how long you’d wait

Tim: 4 minutes a new record 🎉🎉🎉

Tim: THE FUCK WHY DID YOU BITE ME

————————————————

Jason: Im an i’d die/kill for you person stuck in a live for me world :/

Steph: idk what to say to that ngl it hits hard

Jason: Once again ur sarcasm shines through

————————————————

Steph: Yo duke im so hot im the reason you’re black

Duke: …

Tim: I OBJECT YOUR HONOR IM THE REASON HES BLACK

————————————————

Prev - next

[landitolover]

𝒅𝒖𝒍𝒄𝒆 𝒉𝒐𝒕𝒍𝒊𝒏𝒆 part two | previous part ౨ৎ oscar x reader

WELCOME BACK TO DULCE HOTLINE!

enter your password: ***********

message list !

y/n l/n

lando norris

message y/n l/n?

yes > no

you have sent a message!

oscar

heyo

y/n l/n

hi oscar

sooo

ur famous.

oscar

uh yeah

is it gonna be a problem?

y/n l/n

not at all

😆

oscar

you don’t see me

any differently now?

y/n l/n

uhm

no?

i mean, you’re not taylor swift famous….

oscar

glad about that

must be a bit tiring being that famous

y/n l/n

i’d assume 🤔

if u don’t mind me asking

where do u live

oscar

the uk, for the most part

i travel lots though cause of my job

you?

y/n l/n

i’m living in france for a bit

with my two friends 😁

oscar

that’s nice

i like it over there

y/n l/n

yeah it’s quite alright

oscar

how long have you been

living in france?

y/n l/n

not too long

originally i just came here for a wedding

then my friend bought an apartment while she was drunk

oscar

how does one buy a whole ass apartment

while being drunk 😭

y/n l/n

honestly

i have zero clue

kinda funny tho

tell me more about yourself 🥸

oscar

well it’s my first season in formula one

i’m kinda awkward in person

i started karting when i was 10

i prefer dogs over cats

i like tim tams

sorry i don’t know what else to say……

y/n l/n

rookie season, wowie

i’m also awkward in person dw!!

karting at ten? woww i was eating chips on

my bed and watching austin & ally…

dogs over cats……… immediate no 🌝

tim tams are yummy

oscar

it’s your turn to tell me yourself

y/n l/n

okay okay uhm

I’m in uni atm

i have two cats named cinnamon and sugar

oscar

two cats?

y/n l/n

yes yes

oscar

oh! so uhm

how are u on this fine evening

y/n l/n

🌝🌝

very very good

you?

oscar

that’s good

i’m better now that I’m talking to you

y/n l/n

🫣

you’re a flirt, piastri

oscar

🤔🤔

maybe i am

but you like it, don’t you?

y/n l/n

i do

😵‍💫

oscar

i have to go now, sorry

bye :)

y/n l/n

bye oscar!

y/n ⛄️

guys

he wants me so bad ong

xienma 🛐

dulce hotline guy?

y/n ⛄️

yes yes

okay so

i know a bit more about him now

xienma 🛐

do tell

madeline 🤺

yes, tell us abt ur man!!

y/n ⛄️

okay so he’s an f1 driver for mclaren

so basically just cars??? it’s his rookie season

he started karting when he was 10

he loves tim tams

he prefers dogs over cats 🌝

madeline 🤺

that’s kinda boring

xienma 🛐

leave her man alone 🤓

but dogs over cats??

what ABOUT YOUR CHILDREN?????

madeline ⛄️

nah fr

he could POSSIBLY be the father of

cinnamon and sugar 🤔🤔🤔 if he likes

dogs more!!!

y/n ⛄️

dw guys

i can change him 🙏🏼

LOOK AT THIS GORGEOUS MAN

madeline 🤺

we’ve lost her to a man

xienma 🛐

aww he’s a cutie

i’m a ynoscar truther!!

madeline 🤺

i guess i’ll support u guys

just don’t let this be like ur old situationship

xienma 🛐

i second that

y/n ⛄️

i won’t guys, trust!!

he seems like a sweetheart

xienma 🛐

well, i hope everything will

work out for you guys 😁

just want u to be happy!

oscah 🦅

lando

norris

landoh 🤓

yes ?

oscah 🦅

i am so heavily attracted to her

landoh 🤓

dulce hotline girl???

oscah 🦅

obviously

look how beautiful she is

landoh 🤓

did you insta stalk her mate

….🌝

oscah 🦅

uhm

🤣🤣!!

maybe i did

she has two cats

cinnamon and sugar

landoh 🤓

wow mate

are you going to be a father to cats 😱

oscah 🦅

uhm no

i dunno

🤔🤔

landoh 🤓

how does she feel about like

you being famous

does she care?

oscah 🦅

no I don’t think so

she said i wasn’t “taylor swift level famous”

landoh 🤓

thank fuck you aren’t though

that’s good that she doesn’t really mind

about you being famous 🤔🤔

oscah 🦅

i agree

oh my god

oh my hod

landoh 🤓

what ????

oscah 🦅

she messaged me

oh mgmgod

-&;@2&;@?&2&/_*{+~£|¥_£|¥_

bye

bye

TALK TO U LATER

landoh 🤓

I’m actually SICK

seeing u obsess over a girl

this isn’t you babe 🥺🥺🥺

what happened to landoscar

😭😭💔💔

Read 15:00

WELCOME BACK TO DULCE HOTLINE !

YOU HAVE ONE MESSAGE

y/n l/n has sent you a message

y/n l/n

hi oscar 🤓🤓

oscar

y/n l/n

oscar

hi y/n :)

also, you’re sending me all these memes of myself

so does that mean i’m in your camera roll?

y/n l/n

woah

oh

yeah you kinda are.. taking over my camera roll

didn’t even realize

oscar

wow are you already obsessed with me?

y/n l/n

uhm

i don’t think so, piastri

maybe YOU’RE the one obsessed with me!!

oscar

are you trying to use reverse psychology?

clever girl

y/n l/n

clever girl?? i’m blushing

oscar

wasn’t my intention but i’m glad

bet u look cute

y/n l/n

you’re insane for saying that

lord.

oscar

sorry sorry

y/n l/n

yeah no it’s fine

just !

😵‍💫🤔

oscar

quick topic change..

you know why i prefer dogs over cats?

y/n l/n

hm no

why?

oscar

cause i’m scared of cats

y/n l/n

how could you be scared of this baby

oscar

okay well i’m not scared of your cat in specific

just other cats…

y/n l/n

oh so ur biased 🙄

oscar

yes

well

no?

maybe

y/n l/n

you’re never meeting my cats.

oscar

wait no

trust i’ll change for them

y/n l/n

you know what’s funny

you kinda look like a cat yourself

oscar

oh my god

wait

why do i kinda look like one

y/n l/n

oscar pastry is a cat confirmed

piastri***

oscar

🥐

i’m oscar pastry fr

y/n l/n

wowie 🤓

okay i’m gonna go eat now

#dinner time

oscar

alright, bye

have a nice meal

y/n l/n

byee!

y/n ⛄️

HIIIIIII GUYSSSS

xienma 🛐

someone’s happy

what’d he do now

y/n ⛄️

he’s just so

sooooo 😍😍

madeline 🤺

we lost her

she’s down deep

xienma 🛐

i think they’re cute idk

pretty good looking couple imo

y/n ⛄️

i think so too, i might be a little biased though…..

do u guys think that men obsess over

girls the way we obsess over them

like this better be him 🤣🤣🤣

xienma 🛐

GIRL 😭😭

madeleine 🤺

no cause real shit

i wonder if they get giggly n shit

y/n ⛄️

FORREAL U GET ME!!

madeleine 🤺

like do they just go :3 when we message them

xienma 🛐

totally

y/n ⛄️

he totally goes like that when i msg him

he’s so cat coded idk what to tell u guys

madeline 🤺

no wonder y u want him so bad

y/n ⛄️

🌝🌝

xienma 🛐

i’m ynoscar truther forever

madeline 🤺

they barely kno each other 😒😒

THEY MET ON A DATING APP

xienma 🛐

okay girl just cause your little situationship

didn’t work out, doesn’t mean u have to be a hater..!

madeline 🤺

don’t bring that shit up again……

yall fake

y/n ⛄️

woah man

I didn’t say anything

i’m eating dinner!!

and mad, what if he has a cute lil friend 🤫

i’ll set u up 🔥🔥

madeline 🤺

our wag era 😈

y/n ⛄️

ok bye i’m leaving

😴 nap time

xienma 🛐

dream abt oscar xx

Read 16:20

౨ৎ sorry i didn’t post anything about dulce hotline yesterday, i just couldn’t think of anything to write 😭 i might possibly do a double update, so keep a lookout for that!

taglist, @d6za1 @amoosarte @ch3rryknots @moneygramhaas @alessioayla @cherry-piee @chasing-liberosis if you wanna be added, please comment ౨ৎ

[fckbatmanhiskidsareminenow]

bat siblings as things kids have said to me at work.

(i kept me as me because i couldn’t figure out anyone way to format this 😭)

steph: *taps me*

me: yeah?

steph: *whispering* hey show me ur moves

me: what 😀

me: how did you even get pencil on ur face?

dick: i dunno

me: my goodness ur a magician

dick: i am 😌

jason: i like picking my nose

me: how about we take a break from drawing and colour in

cass: no i don’t like colouring

cass: i like colouring more than drawing

me: ??

steph: *telling me about all the drama at school*

me who now has beef with a 4yr old named jessica* that’s wild

me: do u wanna colour them in now?

tim: *nods hesitantly*

me: are u sure? 😅

tim: no *seriously*

duke who arrived all of two minutes ago: *asks me something*

me: you’ve already got paint on ur face how’d you even do that?

duke: i know i put it there

me: aight fair

damian: why can’t u bring ur cat here?

me: that’s a great question

me: timmy pls i love ya but imma need you to stop rocking on ur chair kiddo

tim: timmy? only my mum calls me gems

me: whelp guess what i’m ur mum now stop rocking on ur chair

tim: no 😌

damian: mum-oh

me: listen hear kiddo i’m too young to be a mother

damian: but u said ur cat was ur son?

me: yes i did

damian: that makes no sense

jason: let me guess ur in ur teens

me: let me guess ur 2

jason: 😱 no i’m 7! 😤

me: oh right of course

dick: i’m done 😌

me: u sure? *pulls out other sheet of drawing from behind the first one like a magic trick*

dick: 😮

me: is that the same as that (talking about their drawing and the reference)

duke: yes?

me about to ruin this kids whole career: not quite

me: omg ur a goose

jason: *mildly offended* >:0

cass: *smacks self in the face with pencil*

me and her: *laughing way too loud*

context: student asks about a painting across the room

me: don’t worry about it just do ur drawing

dick: then why do you worry?

me: about what?

dick: about everything!

me: that’s so true

context me and the kids were talking about different coloured fish and one mentioned her doubts about pink fish

me: oh there are pink dolphins…but i guess they aren’t fish..

jason: pink dolphins? no they’re grey

damian: no there are pink ones

me: yeah i’m pretty sure they’re from the amazon

steph: like the shop???

me: *laughs to the point of almost tears*

tim: you got it dude

me: i know i got it but do you? (he doesn’t)

[starstruckmoony]

style.

masterlist

pairing - sirius black x fem!reader

summary - you and sirius start dating after accidentally running into each other at a concert but confirm nothing (till now), just to watch everyone lose their shit online.

trope/tags - band/celeb!au, instagram/social media!au, modern!au, fluff, terrible humour

word count - 1k

warnings - language

part 1 / part 2 / part 3

yourusername added to their story

starmanblack

❤ liked by yourusername, ev.rosier, marymacdonald and 856,327 others

starmanblack shades

26,013 comments

yourusername cigarette*

starmanblack ok duolingo

yourusername smash tbh

starmanblack not you copying my comment

yourusername i don't have the rizz it takes to come up with something original

starmanblack ain't no way you just said that

prongsyboy stop stealing people's glasses 😤

starmanblack never

vance_emm i'm like ragingly gay but you're kinda cute

starmanblack this is why you're my favourite lesbian

mmmckinnon TRAITOR

mmmckinnon it's not too late to delete this

starmanblack get out of my comment section

user828181 address the rumours sirius

user000423 run me over with your car i promise i'll pay for the damages 🙏

user627477 YOU HAVEN'T GIVEN US ANY ANSWERS

user999653 i'm perfect wife material, just saying

user424227 y'all realise that he's less likely to address the rumours if we keep being annoying 💀

user209996 nah fr he's gonna start hating us all

yourusername

❤ liked by starmanblack, prongsyboy, pandorasbox and 899,997 others

yourusername never would have though that my shows in dublin would be the craziest ones out of all but you guys actually delivered and i couldn't be happier! 💕 these past three nights were absolutely insane and i can't wait to be back (and i may or may not have already booked a few venues 😩) PLUS someone got proposed AND I DIDN'T EVEN SEE 😭 so if any of you beautiful people who were there have the video my dms are open for business lmao 🙏💞

tagged ev.rosier

27,664 comments

starmanblack apparently the proposal happened right next to me 💀

yourusername BABE HOW DID YOU NOT NOTICE?

starmanblack CAUSE YOU WERE BETTER THAN THE PROPOSAL

starmanblack my guitar ate as always

yourusername she's even signed 😱

starmanblack slay 😝

yourusername GO TO SLEEP OMG

starmanblack say it to my face 😤

xeno_lovegood i had so much fun

yourusername i'm smiling so hard rn

pete__ sirius is a certified simp because how do you miss a proposal that's happening next to you?

mmmckinnon it's because he's both sirius and a simp petey

prongsyboy sirius doing sirius things 🤣

user552520 dunno bout y'all but i got my confirmation tonight

user073789 YOU WERE SO GOOD OH MY GOD

user843632 i'm so lonely the proposal made me cry

user439546 love me some sappy shit fr

user674848 this was un fucking real no joke

user993455 SAY SOMETHING ABOUT THE RUMOURS I'M BEGGING

user200017 learn to read between the lines lol

starmanblack added to their story

yourusername

❤ liked by starmanblack, bellatrixieb, cissy_blck and 901,077 others

yourusername date night ⭐

29,208 comments

starmanblack pretty dress

yourusername why thank you

starmanblack my stomach feels funny from all that wine

yourusername my precious toilet 😭

marymacdonald gorgeous!!!

yourusername i was impersonating you

vance_emm AND SHE SAYS SHE HAS NO RIZZ

ev.rosier am i about to get fired?

yourusername of course not, you're my second favourite person

starmanblack i'm first

pandorasbox my friends are all so beautiful 🥺

yourusername us hot people stick together 😌

pandorasbox ONG

user329295 sirius is so lucky

user400128 i've never been more jealous of a man

user006272 IS THIS OUR CONFIRMATION?

user883265 mother is mothering

user306084 THE STAR

user243123 if this is another sike istg

user727211 I THINK IT'S NOT A DRILL ANYMORE

user492932 Y/N WE JUST NEED A SIMPLE YES OR NO DON'T DO THIS TO US

starmanblack

❤ liked by mmmckinnon, ev.rosier, casmeadowes and 916,222 others

starmanblack platonic snog

36,775 comments

yourusername people just don't appreciate friendships nowadays 🙄

starmanblack it's just so so sad 😣

yourusername i have better photos of us 👹

starmanblack strongly disagree

yourusername you don't wanna make this a competition

marymacdonald my mum said friends don't do that

starmanblack mama macdonald may be onto something

r.a.black affection 🤮

starmanblack i thought you unfollowed me?

r.a.black i did but i like lurking around here

starmanblack fan behaviour

rjlupin best friend things

prongsyboy HEY I'M HIS BEST FRIEND

rjlupin you were supposed to play along

user020226 MOTHER OF GOD IS THIS REAL

user366232 HDJQJDJQDJQ MY DELUSIONS WEREN'T DELUSIONS

user500447 you still need therapy

user432777 AIN'T NO WAY

user718710 I DIED DEAD.

user907015 GADHQHDQUDJQXJQDJQ I CAN'T FUCKING CATCH MY BREATH

user138282 are you still alive?

user907015 NO

user882446 this and platonic don't go together sirius 🙄

yourusername

❤ liked by walburgablack, cissy_blck, bellatrixieb and 933,052

yourusername pda is afraid of him

39,457 comments

starmanblack FINE you have better photos

yourusername see? that wasn't so hard to admit!

starmanblack i actually won in life

yourusername damn right you did

starmanblack celeb_gossip losing their minds rn

yourusername the kettle is B R E W I N G 🥵🫖🤩👀😳☕😝😻

bartyyy I KNEW BEFORE EVERYONE ELSE HAHA

yourusername well you're the favourite child...

lily_evans kinda illegal how you're both so hot

casmeadowes i've been saying!!!

cissy_blck REG'S SISTER IN LAW 😭

bellatrixieb he's one lucky man

r.a.black lucky isn't exactly the right word but okay

user737729 OH MY FUCKING SHIT

user632444 MY ACTUAL PARENTS

user536272 NOT ME NOT BEING DELULU

user292920 swifities can't relate

user155161 WALBURGA LIKED THIS HELP ME

user993929 narcissa is so real LMFAOOO

user032386 THAT SHOULD BE ME (idk which person i want to be more)

starmanblack added to their story

yourusername

❤ liked by cissy_blck, luciussy, bartyyy and 942,773 others

yourusername happy birthday to this idiot who i unfortunately love very much 💕

tagged starmanblack

30,033 comments

starmanblack tragic how i love you back

yourusername absolutely

starmanblack rizz god since 12

yourusername are you still 12?

lily_evans got me tearing up over here

yourusername awwww 🥺

rjlupin you should have used that one photo where he was on the potty

starmanblack WHY ARE YOU LETTING THEM KNOW THAT EXISTS?

rjlupin denying it would have worked yk

casmeadowes i woke up to this 💀

starmanblack good

mmmckinnon mondays.

user939355 THE CAT

user019661 i'm making this my profile picture

user763772 tell him i said happy birthday

user195666 imagine having someone say they love you so publicly ha ha ha ha ha

user244488 fuck being single fr

user328911 NO BUT THIS IS KINDA CUTE 😭

yourusername added to their story

[michellemisfit]

✨Weekly Tag Wednesday ✨

Thanks for creating the game and for the tag @jrooc thanks for the tag @vintagelacerosette

Today we’re talking fandom. Come play!

Name and A03 handle: Michelle, michellemisfit

Current Location: Living room, surrounded by feathers, as I’m currently fletching some arrows

Favourite picrew: This one is pretty fucking spot on. Or at least it was at the time. Hair is very different now. But then, hair is always different… lol

Also this one is spiritually VERY me

What's one thing you want in a picrew? Ability to add coloured streaks! And a wide selection of scars, or alternatively the ability to move them around the screen. Either is fine. But mostly the hair thing. My hair is generally 4 different colours. Don’t try and limit me to one!!

Favourite thing you’ve created (or seen created) for the fandom? Erm… 3 way tie between Mexico Gallacrafts, Fimo Gallavich, and Cookie Gallavich? Maybe? Argh. Turns out, looking back at my art tag… I’ve created some pretty cool stuff. Huh. Yay me.

Why is it your favourite? I don’t really do photography, and I’m really proud of the idea behind and the execution of that photo. And while I LOVE drawing more than anything, I don’t think I’m exceptional or anything. But I’m damn creative when it comes to silly 3D craft projects, so both Fimo Gallavich and Cookie Gallavich make me happy and feel like something not just anyone could do… I dunno.

Did it come easily or was it hard to create? It was LONG to create. Both cookie and Fimo Gallavich took several days in total. And I think that’s the other thing I like about myself. I am willing to put in the work, and it usually pays off.

Last ao3 fic you commented on? Hah! You’ll be able to corroborate this, I’m not just sucking up!! LOL I’m currently reading Camp is a Battlefield by @blue-disco-lights, @jrooc, and @mybrainismelted, with artwork by @creepkinginc, so that’s the last one I commented on :)

Biggest WIP heartache you’ve ever experienced? I mean… every single WIP I have ever started reading, only to realise that maybe there won’t be any more of it… 😱 Every. Single. One. They’re all special, and they all hurt in their own special ways. And I will remain subscribed to all of them FOREVER, because you never know!!

Also? Comment on WIPs. Tell authors how much joy the story brought you, how much space it’s occupying in your brain, how much you would love to see it continue but how happy you are to have read as much of the story as there is because it’s changed your brain chemistry… do NOT comment saying ‘next chapter when?’, cause that makes you a dick bag.

Favourite trope or head cannon you like included in a fanfic? I’m a sucker for fake dating, only one bed, and a soulmate AU 🤷🏽‍♂️

Least favourite? …not a huge fan of kid fic, but hey, all it takes is a great author to make it work.

Secret or surprising kink or trope? Again, do not kink shame, because you’re only ever one good fanfic away from discovering something about yourself you did NOT see coming…

Describe how you feel after you’ve created something new? Exhausted and antsy. Is it good enough? Are people gonna like it? Should I even bother anyone with this? Why don’t I just go and hide under a rock forever?? I felt okay about this when I finished it, why is it suddenly the worst thing to have ever been created??? …I wish there was a sense of calm and accomplishment. There is not. Brains suck!

Top hype man you have that always helps you get across the finish line: @deedala - I so appreciate how we’re on a similar wave length when it comes to art as well as ‘everybody wants to hunt me for sport’ vibes. I know I can always count on you for kind but honest words, and that’s so important!!

It's been a bad day, you turn to the fandom and you _____? Read comfort fic. Probably Like Real People Do or None the Wiser.

Edit: Also? Go and read comments and tags on old art posts. That’s a sure fire way to cheer me up!

This was fun, and made the 15 minute wait between fletching each feather pass much faster. Thanks!!

If you are currently making your own arrows and need something to occupy your wait time with… how about completing a tag game? lol

@heymrspatel @loftec @creepkinginc @deedala @too-schoolforcool @darlingian @iandarling @iansw0rld @ian-galagher @mybrainismelted @palepinkgoat @crossmydna @mikhailoisbaby @sickness-health-all-that-shit @rereadanon @rutherinahobbit @energievie @junemermaid @francesrose3 @deathclassic @faejilly @rutherinahobbit @gallawitchxx @look-i-love-u @jessij1997 @callivich @celestialmickey @wehangout @doshiart @lynne-monstr @the-rat-wins @blue-disco-lights @suzy-queued @sleepyfacetoughguy @spookygingerr @burninface @gallapiech

[pregduo]

this is just going to be a guessing game for everyone involved

[rhiandoesfandom]

Millie and Blitz Incorrect Quotes:

Blitz: They're collectables Millie! You can't take away the horse plates!

Millie: Uh yeah, collecting in the trash 🙄

------

Blitz: Hey Mills, check it out *puts straws in nose holes*

Millie: *giggles*

Moxxie: Wha-thats not even funny

Millie: he walrus

------

Millie: Ready to go back to my parents house, Blitz?

Blitz: As long as no one tries to kill my boyfriend this time

Millie: uh...no promises

Sally Mae: STOLAS OF THE ARS GOETIA YOU OWE ME MONEY from the last harvest moon festival 😤

Stolas: 😱 Whaaaaat it was a tie!

Millie: now Sallie-

Sallie: fork it up rich guy!

Blitz: *rolls eyes and pays the debt*

-----

Blitz: So for the next hit, Mills you take the rear and Moxxie take the front.

Moxxie: I usually take the rear 😏

Blitz: Oh Satan I don't need to know that

Millie: You already do know that 🤨

Blitz: Oh. Right. Well I don't need to know it again!

-----

Millie: Blitz, just try my Mama's hot coffee with sugars and cream. Please. For me?

Blitz: Millie, hot coffee is an affront to nature.

Millie: You do know the baristas have to make hot coffee before they can cool it down for you right?

Blitz:.......*throws the coffee*

Millie: Oh Satan what have I done.

Blitz: My whole life is a lie!!!! 😭😭😭😭

-----

Millie: Okay when I say Kill, you say humans. Kill!

Moxxie: humans!

Millie: Kill!

Loona: Humans!

Millie: Kill!

Blitz: MA'SELF!!

Millie: NO!

-----

Blitz: So do you wanna keep working for peanuts or do you wanna shake things up?

Millie: Well, I dunno I'm kinda busy.

Blitz: you just said you're between jobs

Millie: yeah and now I'm busy. Joining this guys assassin team.

Blitz: What?! Who?!

Millie: Oh I dunno if you know him. Half his face is scarred. Scarred hands. A freak in a fight.

Blitz: Well...sounds like a great boss....

Millie: 😐

Blitz: good luck....

Millie: it's you asshole!!

Blitz: Ooooooohhhhhhhh

Millie: though I'm having second thoughts now.

-----

Blitz: So I'm your best friend huh?

Millie: Pay me again and maybe you'll stay my best friend.

Blitz: oh 😔

Millie: *punches him* I'm kiddin' blitz

Blitz: I knew that 🥺

[shadowcatzone]

I’m watching a friend draft a modern-ish au with some JingRenHeng sprinkled in and xDDD I swear it’s as tense as you would expect but their brand of humor is something else. (Well, I dunno if you might enjoy it, but I certainly do!)

RenHeng: *serious and tense exes with a wholesome-turned-angsty backstory*

JingHeng: *awkward lads where the latter doesn’t know where they stand with each other while the former is sad but content with just watching the other from afar*

JingRen: *tension over Dan Heng but also????? where do they stand with each other*

Also JingRenHeng:

Memory Zone Meme monster: *commits home invasion*

Dan Heng: 👀 “Well then, guess I’m using that anniversary gift after all!”

Said pre-breakup RenHeng anniversary gift is a tactical axe. Blade had no idea what to get Dan Heng their very first anniversary but he did know that he wanted the other to be safe. Dan Heng was so sure it would be useless until post-breakup.

Jing Yuan walks into Dan Heng’s apartment and almost has a heart attack from seeing all the bloodshed.

Blade is actually just as confused. He thought it would be against a human burglar when Dan Heng would finally use the axe, not against some eldritch dream monster.

BONUS:

Sleepie: *exists*

Jing Yuan: 😱 “Bailu…? What do you have there…?”

Bailu: “Apple juice!” 😊

Jing Yuan: “…Dan Heng—”

Dan Heng: “The guard dog.”

Jing Yuan: “Who—”

Dan Heng: “Apartment security.”

Blade: 😶 “That’s a weird-looking dog…”

that does sound fun, yeah. You can send me the link/title when they're done.

[ilovehazbinhotelomg]

Ok but I can't decide on which ship to make queer platonic for alastor sooooo

Why not make them all

Radiodust

Radioapple

Rosie and alastor (dunno ship name)

Radiohusk

😱😱

3 way qpr with radiohuskerdust

I need to control myself lol