#but i do hate her to a great extent
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stemacademics · 4 months ago
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21 sept 2024 | number theory day
I studied ring of integers mod n today. I'll do more of the ring and group stuff tomorrow, there's a quiz coming up on Monday.
also my new study desk finally arrived today. and there was a minor (minor by the standards of an average, normal and fully functional member of the common society; Major, HUGE - by mine) screwup there as well [listen to me whine below the cut <3]
so my roommate didn't let me know about this desk business when I was in the study room (and she, in the dorm room), so she conveniently positioned the desks in a way that my bed is now too close to the balcony door (the current arrangement is in her favour - she essentially has no change while my bed has suffered a displacement of ~40cm which is unbearably irksome and even hurtful to my existence) and I feel a tad bit too claustrophobic. the 35-40cm shift in position is kind of unbearably painful to me (I um hate changes, absolutely hate them). she also left me with the dirtier desk so I had to wipe at it with my noodle arms for a longer while than it could've been (the surface was white, so I had no choice but to wipe at it for nearly an hour before realising that some of those dirty marks simply wouldn't go - and acceptance does not easily come to me)
I'm guessing that her not telling me was fully intentional because we're not the best buddies (we interact only out of necessity) and I am the kind to assume the worst of any random person that I meet in real life (in the sense, the worst that they can do to me), including myself. all this is kinda stressing me out, and I've not been able to sleep for the past half-hour or so because of the bed, and I'll never ask her to move her desk so I can move back my bed because I absolutely hate confrontations. so I just put up with her and adjust. and I absolutely hate it. my friend says that I have to speak up and can't be a pushover forever but then, ARGH I simply cannot wait for my own single room next year.
I already have a lot on my plate at the moment and the world only hurls more stuff at me, making it worse
it's fine (it's not, but the first step is to lie to my brain, so ┐(´ー`)┌) because I already have a lot of stuff to do, and can't afford to waste my energy on all this.
I've got to mail my mentor tomorrow, study some group and ring formalisms, work on my summer report, study Fourier series and coupled oscillations - I'm going to take it slow anyways, because I'm not quite there for the Hustle yet.
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aroaessidhe · 4 months ago
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2024 reads / storygraph
Asunder
slow-paced high fantasy
a woman who has a contract with an eldritch entity allowing her to see the dead & survives by taking various jobs
when a job searching for stranded smugglers in a cave goes wrong, she ends up with the soul of a dying stranger bound to her shadow
along with a scholar and her old childhood friend, they travel to his home country to find a way to unbind him and save them both
dark fantasy world with gods, demonic entities, arcane magic, and semi-sentient beasts used as transport
#asunder#kerstin hall#aroaessidhe 2024 reads#okay SUPER fascinating worldbuilding with some very visceral creatures and biological constructs and interesting magic systems.#many things I like. A great cast of characters. Honestly I could read tons more stories set in this world.#it’s very slow building and meandering narratively; focusing on the complex journey of the main character#didn’t love the audio narration tbh - it felt like some lines are read with the wrong emphasis or tone? but I got used to it after a while#So this has one of my absolute favourite tropes (bodysharing.) unfortunately it turns it into a romance which is. well.#it just doesn’t hit the same if you make it romantic!! so that kinda made it change traintracks from being on a direct line to#potentially 5 stars to a whole different station where i do not live. lol.#I SUPPOSE it’s a well developed relationship and I’d prefer romances more like that than instalove I guess.#I did love their dynamic; too; but suddenly realising it was romantic threw me for a loop. I had put him in the annoying dad category.#I do also feel like we didn’t get quite enough of him as an individual person and characterisation - which obviously makes sense to an#extent; but I felt like I only got to see more of him in the brief time around his father.#Also he was surprisingly chill and nice to her immediately considering he was essentially her hostage???#Anyway I did enjoy a lot of it; it just suffers the unfortunate tragedy of#[literally my favourite thing made for me] [turns that thing into literally my least favourite thing i hate]#but also -random dude you’re bound to being overly protective and considerate despite barely knowing you (platonic/familial vibe) - yeah!#random dude you’re bound to being overly protective and considerate despite barely knowing you (romantic) ehhhh…idk.....#(to me personally. i'm sure people enjoy that. whatever)
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dykedvonte · 2 months ago
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you make really good points, I think I used the term karmic wrong sorry. I think of it more as not how I personally think he deserved all that happened to him (which thinking back os exactly what karma means, I messed up sorry), but as his fate being directly tied/parallel to anyas. I handnt noticed the toxicity of jimmy and curlys relationship, from the first playthrough I watched and the first interactions I had w fandom I saw so many ppl just. dismiss the terror Anya went through and focus too much on him as the "ultimate victim" and that just didn't sit well w me. I really dislike seeing ppl go "oh well nothing could've been done" I think it's much more complex than that. also I forgot to mention in the last ask that I really appreciate you bringing the point that this game isn't just about the harm of patriarchy but also very very critical to capitalism, I haven't seen too many ppl touch on this. I hadn't thought too deeply about how it makes "he deserved to become disabled as punishment" come up and I agree that's really messed up. I'll try watching a playthrough again with all of this in mind. but either way thanks! I really appreciate your answer 🫶🏼
I guess this is just part of being in a fandom like this. I've noticed a lot of people don't actually see posts outside of their curated view. So some people only get like anya posting or jimmy or curly and it can make it seem like that is what is saturating the conversation.
I mainly just follow the general tags and look for anything new because I'm like obsessed but I know some are only looking for what they want or believe to be the case and can get weird about other ideas.
Sorry if I came off mean its just a last few of the asks have been like circular conversations like this and its not draining per say but seeing all the nuance and details get overlooked to fit a straightforward and basic narrative really sucks cause there's a lot to explore character and theme wise.
#its like idk i feel like im yapping about the same stuff over and over and over again cause people confuse simple on paper with simple in#execution or like without the human factor like idk sometimes to humanzie Anya people dehumanize the other characters to an extent#which is also part of the systemic problem because by dehumanizing people you take away from the awareness like idk the statements#that curly was the captain and just a guy like have to exist together hes like an okay find decent even good captain just not great#hes not exceptional and i think a lot of people are acting like the game said he is when thats just jimmy like Swansea and Anya see that he#just a guy under everything else hence why they dont feed into the vitriol jimmy tries to serve about him crashing the ship and how they#talk to him pre crash even with anya i feel like people are so focused on trying to see what jimmy doesnt that they are adding intention w#where there isnt not even on like she cant be this scale more so you are treating this like everyone in this game is doing some secret gran#gambit when they are just trying to surviv in really back circumstances like having anya respond to jimmys behaviro through the#fawn effect isnt making her a weak depiction its a real response that can coexist with purposeful action because she is clearly scared of#Jimmy even if she hates and thinks he's incompentent like shes not gonna roll over for him but shes gonna be docile in his presence so he#doesnt create a reason in his head to lash out at her like people simply cannot combine concepts to create the complex responses we see in#the game and idkn why its so hard because not every statement contridicts like Jimmy is a monsterous asshole can exist with how#systematic oppression and social enabling create/allow people like him to do their worse cause at the end of the day he chose to do#everything he did despite other options vs the others trying to figure out the best option for all whether that was the best or not like#he dug his own grave vs the others sorta being lined up in front of theirs and shot like this is more interesting to me than him just being#like idk cartoonishly evil and gross and why cant concepts stakes like fitting aspects together is fun its like the worlds shitties puzzle#mouthwashing#mouthwashing game#anon#ask#ur fine anon im just insane and get frustrated easily when i think im explaining something bad
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vicontheinternet · 6 months ago
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Doctor who let doctor who (the show) move on from rose Tyler challenge impossible (derogatory)
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idontwanttospoiltheparty · 2 years ago
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if I wasn't deliberately only peripherally active in the Taylor fandom (which is different from my being a fan of hers, to be clear) I would be posting like 200394835483 million things every fucking weekend
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shararan · 1 year ago
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On one hand it's nice not to be the only one suffering, but on the other hand it's hard not to feel angry about having to watch your loved ones also suffering needlessly without being able to do anything. But then yet again having grown up with a homebound disabled mom definitely played a huge role in being able to recognize that the fault lies not with me re: disability and discrimination, which has helped with dealing with bureaucracy throughout the years.
#sharan talks#my sister and i both inherited shit from dads side though#even if he thinks hes fine. which sure hes much better off than us#but this is also the dude who got a normal shoulder from cold shoulder#due to being hypermobile before LMAO#but he refuses to acknowledge his very obvious neurodivergence too so#but yeah sister and i def inherited the genetic physical stuff from his side#my sister is better off than me especially in the pain department#but still very much not normal nor Good by any decent standards#my mom is def the worst off but hers are unrelated to ours#either way it sucks because i cant help mom to the extent i want because we're both so limited#so it falls to sister or dad who are doing not great either just less worse#and dad especially is noticing his aging now#so does my other dad and hes even older#we're very effective when we all work together especially both dads#but yeah its hard to not worry about the future really#because at some point mom dad and dad wont be here#and i hate to think about that but like#i dread the reality of being able to care for them the way i want to#and navigating the world without them#tbh being disabled both physically and mentally does weird shit to your age#like in some areas i feel way younger than i should#due to the lack of access to true independence#and knowing i'll always ultimately remain under others mercy#and in some ways you feel really old and waiting for orhers to catch up#in figuring out the joys of not working yourself to death#its a weird sense of anachronism but with ones own personhood and it going in two directions#im rambling this has nothung to do with anything#rough days depression hit hard advdaxcsxfs#i had to cancel smth i really looked forward to today and it sucks but as always what can you do
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tealvenetianmask · 3 months ago
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I want to talk about a kind of troubling reaction I've been seeing to both Apology Tour and Ghostfuckers among parts of the fandom. The person is usually a reaction youtuber but sometimes someone writing on tumblr or twitter. They say something along the lines of "oh, I'm glad Blitz is being forced to confront his crimes/traumas/pain. This is the only way he will finally heal."
That's not how healing works.
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I know that reaction youtubers don't always have the most developed takes because they're . . . you know . . . reacting in the moment. But I think it's still worth talking about.
I'm going set aside the people who seem to believe that Blitz needs to be punished for his crimes, and address those who genuinely think that getting a tidal wave of his own trauma in his face is what he needs to heal.
There's an attitude in contemporary culture that traumas are something people need to confront. As in, put on a brave face and dive in like a big boy. I blame capitalism, rugged individualism, and all the pieces of media that tie up a character's arc neatly by having them confront their darkest fears and insecurities. It can put a nice bow on things, but it isn't really how healing from trauma works.
Apology Tour:
Blitz gets confronted by a shit ton of people who hate him, at least some of whom are his exes, who he feels he's personally damaged. The decor and party games are all about killing and torturing him. Verosika confronts him about how much he hurt her. Oh, and then he sees the love of his life, who he's just recently pushed away, making out with another guy- proof, in his eyes, that Stolas is happier without him. And this all reflects the underlying fears he already has about who he is as a person (shown to us by Truth Seekers).
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So what was the takeaway? Blitz came to the conclusion that he doesn't always want to be like this (good, but like . . . worth this much pain?). He flops on his steering wheel (relatable). He stops trying to reach out to Stolas (uh oh . . . ). He spends A MONTH spiraling in his own misery and making a mess of all aspects of his life until he's dragged out of it by a caring friend.
The party doesn't empower Blitz to change. It knocks him down and fucking traumatizes him (seriously, images of Stolas from the party show up later in his trauma reel) too much for him to be able to do actually work toward said change. I suspect that if left to his own devices, he would have kept spiraling for quite a while longer. It's one thing to want to change, and another to try to do so alone in the aftermath of a pile-on.
Ghostfuckers
After Blitz drags himself out of his hole of cheesy ice cream and despair to "play sex ghosts" (escapism, again, still knocked down by Apology Tour), infester demon Rolando picks him out as an easy target and assaults him, yes, assaults, with horrific images of his worst traumas and fears.
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Not to state the obvious, but Rolando isn't interested in helping Blitz heal. He's trying to kill the guy. He wants to engulf Blitz in his trauma to the extent where he's consumed by it and loses the will to fight back. And as some excellent posts by others have pointed out already, he very likely would have succumbed if not for Millie's support.
Millie helps Blitz get through the onslaught by telling him about what makes him great and how he's improved her life and showing him love and care. And by literally beating the fucking infester out of him. Because there's someone in him who's hurting him, who's re-traumatizing him against his will. She takes him away from the reel of horrible memories.
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So . . . do I think that confronting traumas can play a role in healing? Sure. But only if it's consensually (which neither of these situations are) and when the person trying to heal is ready. And most likely in small doses. No one's going and successfully confronting every horrible thing that's ever happened to them in one go.
And in my humble opinion, it's not going to work (for anyone, but especially not for Blitz) alone and without a healthy dose of kindness and compassion (both external and internal).
Blitz has a long road ahead of him toward healing, and it's going to be hard work on his part but also require love and support from the people in his life.
In a wonderful moment near the end of Ghosfuckers, Blitz and Millie work together to get Blitz's wrecked van unstuck and push it back through the portal into Hell. I love it because it's so simple and it kind of tells us everything we need to know. This sweet and salty gremlin has a lot of work ahead of him, but he doesn't have to do it alone.
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juyeoz · 3 months ago
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BABY I — PARK JONGSEONG
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Having a crush on Park Jay, your school’s student president, was quite hard. Especially when he was the centre of attention for many girls. However, who would’ve known he was pinning after you this whole time?
PAIRING — friend!jay x fem!reader (ft. sunoo from enhypen and hanni from newjeans)
CONTAINS — fluff, slight angst, somewhat crack, friends to lovers, mutual pinning to an extent, not proofread, mentions of being stood up, and y/n is kind of introverted.
WORDCOUNT — 3591 words
NOTE — first note on this account!!! just wanted to say baby i by ariana grande inspired this it’s SOOO good pls listen on repeat when reading!
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Park Jay was the student president of your school. He was helpful, trustworthy, smart, athletic, and nice to everyone who came into his vicinity. 
Obviously, you weren’t the only one who loved these aspects of him. He was well known amongst the male population of your school, but that didn’t mean the girls weren’t head over heels for him too.
Which only meant more competition for you. 
In your eyes, Jay was out of your league. He was way more outgoing than you would ever be, keeping many friends at his side, whilst you kept a small group of friends throughout your four years of highschool. 
“Hello? (Name), what were you going to say?” A voice questioned, bringing you out of your cluttered thoughts.
Your eyebrows perked up in surprise, completely forgetting who you were currently standing before—Park Jay. 
He slightly shook his head as a sign for you to continue your sentence. 
“Uh…” You muttered with your eyes looking everywhere but him. 
“What is it? There’s a meeting soon. I can’t wait for long.” Jay spoke again. His words seemed harsh, but his voice was soft.
“Right, sorry. Nevermind what I was going to say, it’s okay.” You reassured him with an apologetic smile. 
Great, another moment added to your ‘Book of Failures’.
Jay was confused, yet he smiled back at you and left in silence. You hated how perfect his smile was. Everything was perfect about him. There wasn’t one thing you didn’t like about him, however, you were pretty sure that spoke for everyone as well.
He was a perfect guy and you were, well, ordinary. You preferred to keep to yourself and stay away from any judgement, with an exception, of course.
Your best friend, Pham Hanni. She was someone you met during elementary school and someone you would forever trust.
“Let me guess, you failed again?” Hanni questioned from the desk beside you. You sighed at her words as your head hit the surface of your desk.
“I very much did.” You groaned out while Hanni smiled. A hand gently made its way to the crown of your head, caressing the area softly. 
“It will be fine! Everyone gets flustered when doing something like this.” She reassured you, but it wasn’t of any help.
“Do you think I could ever confess? I mean, do you know how many people like him? There’s at least a 1 in 600 chance of him reciprocating whatever my heart feels when I’m around him.”
“Well, you guys are close, right?” Hanni asked, but only received silence in return. 
“Right…?” She said once more.
Silence. 
“(Name), don’t tell me you two barely know each other!”
“No, of course not! We are, well, I don’t know. Could you even call us friends?” You asked, a groan escaping your lips shortly after.
“I mean, what are some of your interactions with each other?” 
“After the project we did together in English class, he would say hi to me in the halls, ask me for help in class, and offer me snacks here and there. However, that is it.”
“I’d say that’s between acquaintances and friends? Right?” Hanni pulled the lollipop she snacked on out of her mouth and pointed it at you.
“That is still a lot though! Probably more than anyone has ever had. I think you might have a chance.”
“Or are you just saying that to make me feel satisfied?” You asked while looking over at her.
“No, seriously! But if your words keep getting tongue tied, I don’t think you’ll have a chance anytime soon.” 
Your brows furrowed at her words as you landed a soft hit to her shoulder.
“Careful, my lollipop! I don’t want to drop it.” She exclaimed, her eyes widening at the treat in her hold. You rolled your eyes at this reaction of hers, it was common from her. You were pretty much used to it.
Your eyes glanced over to the doorway as one of your classmates walked in. Hanni looked at your sudden flustered state in confusion and turned around. 
There was no other reason for you to react this way. Park Jay, the boy you had a crush on, was currently walking through the doorway with his younger friend, Kim Sunoo, beside him. 
“You’re so obvious about it.” Hanni said, turning around to face you again and placing the lollipop in her mouth once more.
“I am not! There’s no way he knows.” You said with your face toward Hanni but your eyes on Jay.
He looked over at your seat—a common routine of his—and waved towards you with his signature smile present on his face. After a brief moment of hesitation, you waved back at him as a small smile broke through your flustered condition.
Hanni looked at you, then at Jay as Sunoo did the same. The two boys made their way to their seats up front and began talking once again.
However, the conversation was completely different than the one they were previously having.
“Seriously, are you going to tell her how you feel?” Sunoo questioned as Jay shushed him. 
“Of course not. Do you think she would even like me back? You’re funny.” Jay said while taking his seat.
“Jay, so many people like you.”
“That’s the point. What if she thinks I’m a player?” The boy asked while reaching into his backpack to grab his notebook.
“I doubt she would. There are a ton of options for you at school, but you decided to pin after a girl who you worked on a project with for two weeks. Two weeks.” 
“And those were the best days of my life. Seriously, I didn’t know someone like her existed in our school until this year. I don’t know how I survived until senior year without her presence.”
“Gross! You sound so in love—”
“Shut up! You’re so loud.” Jay whisper-shouted while covering Sunoo’s lips with both of his hands. 
“I’m sorry. Anyway, please think about it. It hurts to see you interact with her continuously just to not confess whatever you’re feeling.” Sunoo said while removing Jay’s hands from his face. 
“Whatever.” Jay mumbled as their teacher walked in. He would be lying if he said he didn’t believe that Sunoo was right. However, he was too nervous to ruin what you two already had.
The keys jangled in the doorknob’s keyhole as you struggled to unlock the art classroom. It wasn’t normal for classrooms to be locked, not at all, but this one was abandoned. 
Nobody used it anymore except for you. It was your quiet place. A place you went to ease your mind and located on the second floor. So, there was quite a process getting there. 
Giving out keys to abandoned classrooms was forbidden at your school. It was an unspoken rule that all teachers followed. However, your homeroom teacher trusted you. You were an excellent student in her eyes and that was enough for her to make up her mind.
The door clicked shut behind you and you made your way to the isolated desk you always sat at. All you had to do was get some classwork done. It wasn’t anything major, but the library would have been too loud at this time.
After all, it was lunchtime.
The sun shone through the thin material curtains, making your figure cast a shadow over your work. Usually, you sat here because it was the closest desk to the window. You gained a great view at the soccer field.
The one Jay always played on. 
Every time you came here, you constantly had to fight the urge to glance over at them. A little glance always went a long way, leaving you distracted for the rest of the hour. 
Giving in, your pencil movement came to a stop as you looked out the window from your seat. As usual, there were boys playing soccer in the summer heat, however, Jay wasn’t there. 
For a moment, you thought you saw wrong and took a closer look. Yet, you still couldn’t find him. 
You were too distracted to even hear the click of the door opening. Too distracted to even hear the footsteps that made its way to you. But you weren’t distracted enough to miss the sound of a desk being placed beside you. 
“What are you doing here?” You asked in a somewhat low voice. 
It was Jay. The boy you were previously looking for.
“Resting. You?” He replied while laying his head on his arms all while facing you. You avoided eye contact with him as usual. His gaze was too flustering for you. You couldn’t handle it.
“I’m studying.” You said and looked at your blank notebook page. You could feel his gaze still on you. It felt like it could see through you at any given moment. Once again, it was too much for you to handle. 
You needed to get rid of him quickly.
“You can’t be in here. It’s off limits.” You said, still not looking at the poor boy.
“Then why are you here? It’s an abandoned classroom and yet you’re here.” Jay said back. He wasn’t wrong. To be honest, he never was.
“Our teacher gave me permission. I work here often.” You explained as your pencil began to move, writing absolutely nothing but scribbles.
“Me too.” He said, leaving you confused. You looked over at him with a puzzled expression which only left him with a smile. 
“Your eyes are pretty.” Jay said and left your unsaid question unanswered.
His words only made you look away once more as your puzzled expression was replaced with a flustered one.
“What did you mean by your previous words?” You asked, discarding his compliment. 
“Which one? Your eyes are pretty? I mean, they truly are—”
“The other ones.” You interrupted, cutting him off. 
“Oh, Mrs. Jang lets me use this classroom to cool off my head when I get overwhelmed. I was shocked that it was already unlocked when I came. I didn’t know you used it too.”
“We never run into each other.” 
“I see,” he sighed and nuzzled his face further into his arms. 
You could still feel his gaze on you as silence fell upon you both. You were confused. Why did he compliment you? Did he like you back or was he only teasing you? Did he do this with every girl he saw or were you his only exception? 
Which one was it?
“Why do you keep doing that?” Jay’s voice pushed through your thoughts, startling you.
“Doing what?” You asked, still avoiding eye contact with him.
“That,” he began. “You don’t look at me when you talk to me. Do you hate the sight of my face or something?” 
“Of course not!” You exclaimed, catching both of you off guard. 
“I mean, I’m just shy.” 
“For sure.” He teased you.
Silence filled the classroom once more as you tried to do your work. Heavy emphasis on the word tried. 
He was still looking at you. You knew he was and he knew you knew too. 
“(Name).” Jay called. 
The way your name rolled off of his tongue was too much for you. You hated the sound of it. It was a precise pronunciation with a slight ring to it.
You swallowed thickly and nodded at his call, giving him the signal to proceed.
“Do you like me?”
“And then what?!” Hanni exclaimed, waiting for the rest of the story to leave your lips.
“What do you mean?” You asked. Your words only left Hanni feeling dumb.
“Was that it?” She asked as part of her hoped you would say no. However, to her dismay, you nodded your head.
“(Name)? He literally asked if you liked him and you didn’t even reply?!” She said in a loud tone. Luckily, you two were at your house so it was fine for her to be this way. There was nobody to overhear your conversation anyway.
“You blew it. You blew it!” 
She was in distress. After waiting for this moment to happen, she felt like her world officially ended. 
“I freaked out, okay? The bell went right after that!” You said in an attempt to defend yourself. 
“Let me guess. You used the excuse of being late when returning the classroom key and ran out in a haste.” 
“Spot on.” You said with a groan.
“Did I really mess up?” You asked. 
“Is that even a question? Seriously, I don’t know what I’m going to do with you.” Her face went dull as she sighed. You were definitely a handful to take care of. 
“Wait, I have an idea.” She suddenly said and her face brightened up immediately. You looked over at her with a frown. 
“Do you have his number?” Hanni questioned. Hesitantly, you nodded at her words. You only got his number because of the English project you two had to do and would text occasionally, but out of the blue was not the best option.
“Absolutely not! That’s too far.” You said while shaking your head at the idea you had of her possible plan.
“Chillax, it’s not too far at all. It’s better than leaving his somewhat confession hanging in the air.” 
She had a point.
“Fine. What are you going to say?” You asked while giving her your phone. You were nervous for whatever tricks she was planning on pulling, but you handed her your phone regardless.
“You’ll see.” Hanni said and began typing away.
For a while your room went quiet. The only sounds heard were Hanni’s fingers tapping against your phone screen and the wind outside of your window.
“Here.” She said after three minutes and handed you your device. You looked at her, taking note of how she bit back her smile. 
You were scared to see what she did, but you weren’t even able to due to the sudden incoming call. 
“What the hell, Hanni?!” You exclaimed as she only smiled. She ushered for you to answer the call as you did exactly that—after leaving your room, of course.
“Hey.” His voice was soft as usual on the other line. It made your heart beat faster, making you feel stupid.
“Hello,” you greeted back, waiting for him to say whatever he called for.
“Is it true?” 
“Is what true?” You asked. 
What the hell did Hanni even text him for him to ask this?
“You liking me. Is it true?” He sounded desperate. He wanted to know immediately. 
You hesitated on replying. Would it mess everything up, or what? His question back in the art classroom wasn’t something that sounded like he was looking for reciprocating feelings. If you said yes, where would that response take you?
“Yes, it is.” You replied in a somewhat whisper. Jay exhaled harshly, leaving you confused. Did you mess up? Why did he sigh so harshly? What did Hanni put you through? 
You turned around in a rush to open the door. You were nervous. You didn’t want to hear what came after his sigh. Not at all.
You were about to hand the phone back to Hanni, but was brought to an abrupt stop.
“Good.” Jay said. 
“Let’s talk about this in person tomorrow. I don’t want things to escalate on call, okay?” 
You hesitated in replying to his suggestion. Was that a good okay or a bad okay? Was he planning to reject you harshly? Was your friendship over?
“Is that okay with you, (Name)?” His voice once again pierced through your thoughts, bringing you back to reality.
“Yes. That’s okay with me.” You replied and you two said your goodbye before hanging up.
“So?” Hanni asked, waiting for you to explain what happened.
“I don’t know.” Was all you could say before flopping forward onto your bed with a racing heart.
Jay, on the other hand, paced back and forth in his room. You liked him and that was great! However, he didn’t want to ask you out over the phone. That wasn’t romantic at all.
How should he go about this? Should he confess in the morning before class or at lunch in the art classroom again? Should he bring flowers? Of course he should. Many people loved them.
But wait, were you allergic to them? Maybe not if you helped out the garden club leader Yang Jungwon that one day, right? He remembered the moment vividly. 
It was the time he confirmed his feelings for you. The way you smiled at the boy and listened attentively when he explained things to you. Honestly, that should’ve been him, but he had his moments during the English project.
Part of him even thought you liked Jungwon and not him. That was the only reason why he asked you the question at lunch yesterday. Even if the garden club incident happened last month, it still managed to bug him everyday.
At this point, his frequent questions wouldn’t get answered. His best option was to sleep. He could think of everything tomorrow morning. Before heading to sleep he sent you a quick message, letting you know where to meet him the next day. 
Near the garden, fifteen minutes after eight a.m. Easy and possibly romantic.
However, when the next morning came, you stood alone near the garden, fifteen minutes after eight a.m. And Jay was nowhere in sight.
You checked your phone constantly, hoping he sent you a text, letting you know of the change of plans. To your dismay, there was nothing. It was absolutely a ghost town on your phone and also five minutes left until the bell went. 
Were you just stood up by your crush? Most likely. You felt embarrassed. You were completely right about Jay not liking you back, nevertheless, you let Hanni’s words get to your head. Was it her fault? Absolutely not, but you wondered. What if you never gave her your phone at that time? Would you and Jay still be just friends?
A hand grabbed your wrist, halting your movements. You didn’t even get far from the spot you stood at. It was so sudden and scary and their grip never faltered.
You turned around and were, luckily, met with an out of breath Jay. The boy who you had a crush on and who you thought stood you up.
“I’m sorry.” He said while letting go of your wrist and standing up.
“I woke up late, I didn’t mean to leave you standing there alone. I swear of it.” He explained as you listened, avoiding eye contact. 
“It’s fine. What did you want to say?” You asked.
“First off, please look at me when I say all of this.” He pleaded, causing you to slowly look over at him.
“Okay. I really didn’t mean to leave you waiting. I had my alarm set and everything, yet I still slept past it. I couldn’t sleep all night because of this. I was nervous.” 
You remained silent, in which he took as a sign to continue.
“When I saw you text me the other day, I was thrilled. I thought I ruined everything by asking you if you liked me during lunch. Seriously, the way you ran out so suddenly left me worried.” 
“I’m sorry. I was flustered.” You apologised and he shook his head.
“It’s okay. I’m glad I found out you truly did like me though.” He said as a slight smile made its way to his face.
“Do you like me back?” You asked, genuinely. He didn’t say he did. You weren’t sure if he did either.
“What?” He questioned back.
“Do you like me back?” You repeated, hoping it would get through him this time.
“Of course I do. Why wouldn’t I?” He was dumbfounded that you even asked him that. Was it not obvious by his many interactions with you compared to others? 
“Please, don’t say it like that.” You muttered and avoided eye contact with him again. 
“Why not? Does it make you flustered?” 
“Yes, it does.” Your voice was quiet and made Jay’s smile grow bigger.
“I’ve liked you for a while now, (Name). Ever since the English project actually. Those were the best days of my life.” 
“Not even being promoted to student president?” You questioned as your heart beat increased drastically. 
“Not even close.” He said back.
You remained silent at his confession and played with the dirt below your shoes. 
“So, what do you say?” He asked. 
“What do you mean?” 
“Can I be your boyfriend?” He asked again.
“Enough of that!” You exclaimed, softly hitting his shoulder.
“What am I doing wrong?” He was confused. He didn’t even do anything this time. It was a genuine question. 
“Can I, (Name)?” 
He did it again. The way he said your name only left you even more flustered as you let out a mumbled ‘yes.’ 
He could barely hear what you said and only picked up the ‘s’ sound at the end of your word. The boy before you smiled. 
He was glad you said yes. 
“I’m glad.” He voiced out and engulfed you into a hug which you reciprocated. 
The bell finally went once you two began to hug. Those were the longest five minutes in your life, but they were definitely worth it. Hanni and Sunoo were most likely going to have a field day with this new information. 
You could say, they were the ones who made this all happen with their constant pushing, right?
Yeah, most definitely.
© JUYEOZ
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ENHYPEN PERM TAGLIST — @miumura @macapunoz @kxppachu
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i-smoke-chapstick · 4 months ago
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‘SAILOR SONG,
-THEPENGUIN!SOFIA FALCONE X READER-
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⋆ 𝐒𝐘𝐍𝐎𝐏𝐒𝐈𝐒 ; You run into Sofia at Berto’s funeral. You’re the only one who can calm her down.
⋆ tags/warnings. sofia falcone x female reader. ANGST AND COMFORT!! Might make this a series if anyone likes it enough <3 she’s my literal BABY im so in love with her it makes me want to kms! she deserves SO much better i just wanna give her a hug (and a kiss). slight homophobia mentions, past relationships (but unclear), THE HANGMAN!!!!! Based on 1x2, bertos funeral ! she is my girlfailure wife and i need her
♫ “Begging, baby, would you please? / Do the things you said you'd do to me. / And when we're getting dirty, I forget all that is wrong / I sleep so I can see you 'cause I hate to wait so long.” Sailor Song by Gigi Perez
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High tides. That’s what Gotham is, after the haunted return of the Batman. At least, that’s all you see around you now. Theres blood in the water, and the sharks have all come to hunt.
You think it’s all bullshit. The bat, the Riddler, this fucking funeral. You hardly knew the man, and you know it’s a waste of time. Everyone dressed in black here is only cutting their losses. It’s all out of fear. Berto was unabashedly himself. And that was weak. He tried too hard to be his father.
You scan the funeral, which might as well be a party for some of these fuckers, and hold your breath. Okay, maybe you’re more upset than you’d like to admit. Nihilism appeases the soul where optimism does not. You’d only had very few conversations with him, but he was…nice, to some extent.
It’s a day of mourning. And that’s what you do. Memories come to you in unsafe and ungrateful waves, alerting you of every interaction you’d ever had with the man of the night.
“Hey, so,” He scratched the side of his head with his index finger. “Wha- What’s up with you and my sister?” A bitter smile on his face, nose scrunched in faux curiosity. You’d known better. You grew up your entire life in Gotham, and you had known a thinly veiled threat when you’d heard it.
“Sofia?” You’d asked, lighting a cigarette. The sunset flooded through Italy’s streets. It wasn’t your first summer here. You took a long drag of smoke, thinking of how to phrase your answer. The Falcones weren’t stupid, none of them were, not really. “Nothing.” You settled on, dabbling it out in the ash tray. “Why?”
You’d expected some bullshit to fly from his mouth. The family…That you were an outsider. That whatever the two of you had going on was distasteful. A woman and a woman. Not a good look in the papers. Weak willed woman frolicking together in Gotham’s underground. You expected him to insult you, and her. What would their father think?
But Alberto didn’t say anything like that.
“If you hurt her,” He began, and you felt yourself visibly recoil. “I’ll have to, you know,” He motioned with his hands, forming a gun with his forefinger against his temple, and a pew sound. “Pop your top.”
Returning to yourself, you find it in yourself to be greatful. For Alberto, not ratting the two of you out. Whatever you two had…was more than the both of you ever managed to let on. Small touches here and there, kisses when you played house. Laughing underneath streetlamps, painting her nails. And then she got locked up in Arkham. Your best…friend.
And now she’s finally released. Idiots with poster boards outside begging for her return to the loony bin. She’s somewhere in this house, on the same floor as you.
You mindlessly sip on your glass. Alchohol is your real friend tonight. The undergrounds in shambles, the entire city is. What’s stopping you from leaving? You don’t know. Not until you see her.
She trails in the room, and the first thing you hear are overwhelming whispers. You don’t pay attention to them, how could you? Her hair tied up messily, sticky bangs and beads of sweat on her forehead. Her makeup is neat, but just barely smudged.
She’s bug eyed as she enters, chest heaving in…anger? fear? She pays much more attention to the whispers than you do, you realize.
“She’s crazy,” You hear from behind you. Faces hide behind there glasses and hands, leaning down and gossiping amongst themselves. It makes you sick. She makes you sick. Even more so, as she seems to lose herself. It starts with a small bite, digging at the finger food, before she picks up heaps of it in her palms. Over and over and over again…
“That’s enough,” You whisper, sternly, grabbing her forearm. Her mouth almost drops open with the food, eyes widening even more. She stops chewing, and for a moment, it seems everything and everyone is finally scilenced.
She doesn’t say a word in her shock, her arm falling down. She lets you guide her out the room, and the both of you ignore the comments from passerbys.
When you finally reach an empty room, you close the door. Her blood runs cold, and she’s perpelled to the edge of the room, like a cornered and vulnerable prey animal.
“What are you doing here?” Sofia drawls, clearing her throat. Her cheeks are tinged pink from embarassment, and her nose twitches in frustration.
“I knew him too.”
“No, you didn’t.” She remarks, firm in her stance. Her jaw is clenched tight, and you sigh. You make your way over to a couch, sitting down lazily. It doesn’t feel how it used to.
“Yeah, I didn’t. But I got an invitation.”
She ignores you. Straight to the point.
“You’ve heard. What they are saying about me, out there.”
“Hard not too.”
She scoffs, letting out a hmph noise. She turns away from you, blinking.
“Well. Do you believe it?” She tests, arms crossed. You feel your eyebrows scrunch, and you give her a once over. You want to scream at her, that she isn’t crazy. That whatever she’s done isn’t her fault, not completely. But you can’t claw the words out- not after not seeing her in years.
“You do, don’t you?” She continues. She stops pacing the room to take a seat parallel to you. You bite your tongue.
A beat of silence, and something in her dark eyes takes it as your final answer. Theres something deeper, darker swirling in them you can’t quite place. She’s not the same girl you knew as a child.
“No,” You whisper, finally, and watch her perk up. “You’re not crazy.”
She stays silent as she looks at you disbelievingly. Like you’re saying it simply to appease her. You find it in yourself to let the tension melt away, leaning back into the cushions.
“You don’t need help.” You affirm, and her expression is unreadable. “You aren’t broken. Or whatever those fuckhead doctors told you in Arkham. You’re just…” You trail off, needing to word this right. “You’re just your fathers daughter.”
You expect her to ask ‘what thats supposed to mean?’ but she doesn’t. No…she looks too vulnerable in this light to fight back against you. Again, silence sounds, and you wonder if you’ve made a mistake.
It’s only when she speaks, voice trembling, do you see her resolve break.
“Why didn’t you visit me?” It’s quiet, almost a whimper, and her voice breaks. “In Arkham?”
There it is. The question you’d been dreading, mostly because you didn’t know the answer yourself.
Her eyebrows are pulled together, nails clenched into her own skin. You go to tear them from her palms, opening them up to find the marks. She doesn’t say a word. She makes no move to push you away. She’s too tired. She’s greiving, her father, her mother, her brother, her sanity.
You lean down, and press a gentle kiss to her nails. A strangled sound is ripped from her at the action, and you notice how her eyes turn glossy. You decide to ignore the question for now, watching tears finally slip from her eyes. She’d been holding them in for what felt like forever. But not with you, she finds, she could never hide anything from you.
You pull her in, embracing her for all its worth. She immeadiatley falls into you, open mouthed sobs against your shoulder. You hug her tight, and it feels blissful. After so long of only seeing her on TV reports and pictures, touching her, feeling her, is heavenly. Just like it used to be.
She still smells the same. Her makeup runs as she cries into your shoulder, and you gently hush her. You pet her head and hair, cradling her like she’s fragile glass about to break. She’s yours. You’re hers. You always have been.
Rocking her back in forth, you place a kiss on her forehead. When she leans into you, you place more. Soft little pecks across her skin, to her head, wrist. You kiss all her tears away as they fall. Sweet and salty, wetting your lips. You feel her try to catch her breath.
She pulls away from you, hair messy. Her lips are parted, and her pupils blown, and theres a silent promise in the air between the two of you. I’m with you. Im on your side. I am the woman who wants you to win.
Her hand trails to your cheek, and she looks at you worshipfully. Her eyes flit to your lips, as if asking, begging for just one.
You nod. You could never deny her anything. She leans in, tentiavley, before connecting your lips. Memories flash through your head. She tastes the same, acacia honey and cigarette smoke. Besides yourself, you deepen the kiss, and she responds tenfold.
Her hands thread through your hair with a gentle tug, as if there is a feral need buried underneath her skin, to possess you. Remind herself you are here, and you are hers, not an illusion. Not a nightmare. She would kill for you.
You have to almost fight her to part for air, pulling away with heavy breaths. She doesn’t let you get far, resting her forehead against yours.
For better or for worse, she has stuck her claws in you. You realize she will not let you go. Not tonight. Not tommorrow. Not ever.
Breath intermingling, her body heat radiating against yours, you can’t find it in yourself to care.
You stay like that, unanswered questions still plaguing the silence. You’ll answer them one day. For now, you choose only to lose yourselves in one another.
You regret not telling Alberto the truth before he died. She’s not nothing to you. She’s everything.
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helluvapoison · 1 year ago
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Make Me Weak
˚✧₊⁎ The Vees ⁎⁺˳✧༚
warnings: violence
ʕ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʔ
˚✧₊⁎ Velvette ⁎⁺˳✧༚
• Everything you are she should abhor– and would if it was anyone else— so she doesn’t pretend to understand how you weave into her life so easily. That time is instead spent wondering how the fuck she’s survived both her hellish lives without you
• Velvette always felt she was owed the praise and compliments she got. Receiving them from you was an entirely different type of high to ride. Your candied tone and sickeningly sweet words clung to her like smoke and had her itching for more
• You massage her hands so she has no choice but to surrender her phone, only then does she realize how cramped they’ve become. You sit in her workshop during Hell Week, sending a mellowing wave that relaxes her chaos in the form of a simple thumbs up. You make up for not being on the receiving end of her camera by setting up aesthetic dates for her to capture instead
• Velvette captures your chin, “You put up with a lotta my shit, Dollface. I’m not great at sharing credit, but I couldn’t have done this without you.”
“But I didn’t do anything?”
“You’re my muse, baby. Gimme the word and I can have you on a billboard tonight. Fuck Joanne, the raggetty bitch, I’ll bump her and have you up there for all of Hell to see!”
Your smile falters to a grimace, your eyes telling her what she already knows. Vel doesn’t get why you hate the limelight. This conversation always ends one way and if she hears you say one bad thing about yourself, she’ll tear out her hair. With a sigh, she tucks you back under her arm and kisses the crown of your head
“Fine. I didn’t wanna share you anyways.”
Your light laugh makes her smile again
˚✧₊⁎ Valentino ⁎⁺˳✧༚
• Val does everything in his power not to allow you to witness one of his volatile moments. He has a very specific image of you in his mind and to a looser extent, you do too. You’re not prim or naive that you don’t know what he does, but his violent tendencies are something else to behold. You’re too sweet, too pure to completely join his world
• It’s never bothered him before, seeing that look on someone’s face. The one where their eyes go wide in horror because they know exactly what comes next but there’s no telling what would happen if the pedestal Val put you on crumbled because you saw him grabbing a whore by the neck and using them as an ashtray
• Truly, no indulgence he’s ever sampled has come close to taking the edge off him like one of your hugs. Softer than angel wings and more intoxicating than any elixir, you’re euphoria trapped in a sinner’s body
• “I almost feel bad for keeping you to myself,” Val purrs in your ear. He’s been laying underneath you for six minutes and already the shittiness of the day evaporated, “I could bottle and sell you. Make everyone in Hell as happy as I am.”
A nervous, bitter laugh escapes you
“You wouldn’t make much money, Val.”
“I would make millions, corazón” He argues seriously, though he has no intention of sharing you
˚✧₊⁎ Vox ⁎⁺˳✧༚
• The irony is lost on him; someone as soft as you could bring him, an Overlord, to succumb. Below the surface, he’s more insecure than he lets on. He’s perfected the mask of a charming show host, developed it so well that it bleeds into his personality. So much so, that you make him glitch when he gets an inkling of self doubt. Your gentleness makes him weak and it terrifies him, fills him with the urge to push you away but your arms are so inviting that he lets himself be cradled by them. How could he do anything but?
• Rare are the days where he actually feels tired but those are the days he seeks out your affections. To him, you’re safe. You won’t judge him, you don’t pry for details, you’d never tell him to suck it up
• Vox lets himself sink into the couch beside you, tapping your thigh with a claw to invite you to come closer. You never fail to accept and deliver exactly what he needs. It’s bizarre how you know what he needs when he doesn’t himself. Turning to straddle him, you rest your head on his chest and hug him impossibly closer
• “You’re tense today,” You comment quietly, giving him a comforting squeeze.
“Come with me to set for once, you’ll find out why.”
Nuzzling into his chest as if trying to find his nonexistent heartbeat, you replied, “Nah. Sounds like too much of a hassle.”
“Exactly why I need you there.”
“Promise not to bring me on air like you’re always threatening to?”
A dry cackle escapes as he keeps his gaze towards the ceiling. Vox has this fanatical plan that you two could be the power couple of Hell, outranking Lucifer and Lilith (and lasting twice as long) if you would just sit at the same desk as him, deliver news and playful banter that would knock 666 News down a couple thousand pegs. You were worried someone wouldn’t want to see your face, you’d make his ratings plummet, you’d ruin everything he worked so hard to build. He hates when you spiral like that.
“No.” Vox mumbles honestly.
He’d prove you wrong like he’s done everyone else, one way or another
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couldeatthatgirlforlunch · 6 months ago
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Please can we have more Yan justice league?
Maybe the reader has a boyfriend in the military so she doesn't see him much and when he comes back to visit, the go on a fancy date before they crash it?
It would make it even better if they reacted to the boyfriend about to propose to her!
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A Day in Life: Heartbreaks
Synopsis: A day in your life where your yanderes find a secret of yours and tell you another one.
Pairing: Yandere!Justice League X Assistant!Gn!Reader; Modern!40s!Bucky Barnes X Reader
Tw: Bucky you’re one of my fav characters from Marvel, I'm so sorry I did u dirty😭; Heavy mentions of cheating and NO forgiving; Stalking; English isn’t my 1st language.
Word count: 1k
Requested? Duh.
Extra notes: I should be studying instead of writing this. Also omg I got so many requests in just a few hours, thank you very much!! I'm writing them all!!
General masterlist | A Day in Life - Series masterlist
Since most of your days became filled with stress and anxiety, you started appreciating even more moments where you could just forget all your problems, from small ones — like, lack of motivation to go to the gym, bad hair days and an ingredient you forgot at your fridge and became rotten—, and big, out of your control ones — like seven superheroes, who you see almost everyday, stalking you.
Your boyfriend getting back was one of the best dic(k)strations.
Bucky was a sergeant, he spent weeks, even months, away from you on missions. It was hard, but you were both busy people, so your mind was usually too stimulated to think about boy problems only all day, most adults were, and you believed the hard work would be worth it one day. The future was hopefully bright.
The League never mentioned him. Actually, some of them implied more than once that they thought you were available, so they probably didn't know about your relationship. You didn't use much social media and your boyfriend got especially busy this year, so it made sense.
He paid for you to get your nails done earlier and took you to a nice restaurant. After that, Bucky took you for a walk around the city, lively and beautiful even at night, and stopped at the park where your first date happened. Everything was fine, until he got on his knees. Suddenly, seven, mostly colorful, figures descended upon you from out of nowhere, screaming.
— (Y/N)! YOU CAN'T MARRY HIM! — Flash’s voice startled you, confirming your suspicions to who the group was.
You growled.
— SERIOUSLY? LEAVE ME ALONE! IT'S MY DAY OFF! — Bucky, who had swiftly gotten up with his fast reflexes as soon as the heroes charged, blinked at the sight. He looked between you all.
— Doll? What’s this? — You looked apologetic at him.
— Sorry, Bucky. Since I got my job, my bosses got… Protective over me… — You didn't want him to get hurt. Bucky and his friends had a great sense of justice and hated bullies. He would surely want to do something if he knew the true extent of things. You also didn't want to ruin the vision he had of his idols.
Since their obsessive behavior started, you just counted your lucky stars that they would just get tired of you one day or wouldn't sabotage your relationships. They seemed fine with you having friends, but dating was different.
You turned to the League.
— Go! — They shook their heads.
— You can't trust this bastard, darling. We have proof of his betrayal to you. — You looked at Wonder Woman skeptically and crossed your arms. Bucky gulped.
— Oh, really? How so? — You raised an eyebrow.
Batman fiddled with his wrist computer, a second later, a protection was shown and different pictures and videos of your man talking and being very intimate with someone very familiar to you appeared. Your stomach churned and your heart ached.
— This is fake! Doll, you have to believe me! — Bucky cried out and got in front of you, holding your shoulders, trying to cover your vision from the images. You took a step back and kept looking at the images.
The League had more than enough means necessary to fake all of this, but you knew Natasha was Bucky’s ex, and they were still friends and coworkers, even with their intense heartbreak. You sometimes got insecure and worried since they spent so much time together, but he always told you you had nothing to worry about…
You gulped.
The League was all glaring at his back while he shouted a hundred words per minute, desperately trying to convince you he was telling the truth.
Superman growled and walked forward until he grabbed Bucky by his shoulders and pulled him away from you.
— Stay away from them, you asshole. (Y/N), I would never do that to you. — You ignored Green Lantern's words, like you were doing since the pacifier incident. You knew he was getting desperate and that made you specially scared, but at least he gave you some distance.
— Not now. — Batman took a step forward. — A few hours ago, we discovered your relationship. For security reasons, we searched, and found these pictures and conversations from his second social accounts, that he uses to commit his cheating.
— He didn't try to hide much, he thought he wouldn't get caught. — Flash stated.
— I-I need more proof… These could be old… — Your first words spoken made Bucky shut up. Mind scrambling for something.
— Let the Lasso of Truth speak for him. — In a second, the Lasso was thrown around Bucky's torso and he was squirming. — Speak, you worthless mortal! — Wonder Woman ordered.
Bucky was able to struggle for a few seconds, before he blurted out.
— It's truth! It's truth! I told her we broke up and started dating her again! I thought I could have you both at the same time!
You gasped. Your hand shot to your chest.
Flash was on your side in a second, trying to hug and comfort you, but you pushed him away. You started crying from heartbreak and anger.
— HOW COULD YOU?! — You glared at him and pointed at his face.
— Doll… I swear I love you both. But I'm also narcissistic, insecure and look down on women. — The Lasso was really doing its job. You laughed humorlessly.
You had nothing to say anymore. No reason to stay. You took advantage of his tied arms and got close, punched his nose, and stomped away.
The League contemplated going after you and trying to bring you comfort, but Batman and Martian Manhunter decided to just let Bucky go (after intimidating him so as to not get close to you again) and follow you discreetly, watching you from the shadows, intervening only if necessary.
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prettygirl-gabi · 10 days ago
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Chapter 25: Birthday Surprise
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Rating: Mature Audiences
Warning: fluff, spicy, wlw smut, birthday sex, Paige being a munch, !top paige, !bottom reader, oral (fem reseving), fingering (fem reseving),
Paring: Paige Bueckers x !photographer fem reader
Fandom: Women's basketball
Summary: good... great.... Amazing
Welcome to the chapter 25 of Through The Lens. I hope you all enjoy and there is more to come...stay tuned my loveies!! 🏀💕📸
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Reader's POV
Birthdays were always a big deal in my family, which made being so far from home this year feel especially hard. For the past two years at UConn, I’d made the trip back to Georgia to celebrate with my mom, dad, and granny. But with classes, work, and filming for the team, there was no way I could manage the trip this time.
Paige had been trying to cheer me up all week, but even her usual antics—like balancing a basketball on her head or dramatically serenading me with off-key versions of random love songs—weren’t doing the trick.
"Don't pout, kid," Paige said, sliding her arms around my waist as I stood at the kitchen counter in her dorm. "We'll make it special here. I promise."
I smiled weakly and nodded. Paige always tried her best to make me happy, and I loved her for it. Still, I couldn’t help missing home.
Paige's POV
I hated seeing Y/N sad, especially on her birthday. That’s why, as soon as she mentioned not being able to go home, I started plotting with the team. With Coach Geno's blessing, we’d arranged for her parents and granny to fly up to Connecticut. But the real trick was keeping it all a secret.
The morning of her birthday, I got up early to decorate my dorm. She practically lived here now, but Y/N was here even more than I was, and I wanted her to feel like this was her space, too.
I hung up strings of fairy lights, scattered balloons and flowers everywhere, and set out a cake on the desk. The highlight was a photo collage I’d made of our favorite moments together—from her first game filming for the team to random late-night study sessions.
When she walked in, still rubbing sleep from her eyes, her jaw dropped.
“Paige…” she whispered, her voice thick with emotion.
“Happy birthday, baby,” I said, pulling her into a hug.
She clung to me for a moment before pulling back to take it all in.
“This is…wow,” she said, wiping at her eyes. “You didn’t have to do all this.”
“I wanted to. You deserve it,” I said, kissing her forehead.
Reader's POV
I thought Paige's dorm setup was the extent of my birthday surprises, but I was wrong.
The game against Oregon state started like any other home game. I was courtside, filming warm-ups and getting close-ups of the team’s determined faces. Paige caught my eye from across the court, flashing me a wink before sinking a perfect three-pointer.
As halftime approached, I packed up my camera to grab some water. But before I could step away, Kk ran up to me, grinning.
“Don’t go anywhere,” she said, practically bouncing on her heels.
“Why?” I asked, narrowing my eyes suspiciously.
“Just trust me.”
A few minutes later, the arena lights dimmed, and the announcer’s voice boomed over the speakers.
“Ladies and gentlemen, please join us in wishing a very special happy birthday to one of our own—Y/N!”
Spotlights swung toward me, and the crowd erupted in cheers. I froze, my face burning, as the team gathered around me, pulling me toward center court.
“Wait, what is this?” I asked, looking at Paige, who was trying (and failing) to hide her smirk.
She nodded toward the tunnel entrance, where I saw three familiar figures emerging. My heart stopped.
“Mom? Dad? Granny?” I whispered, tears springing to my eyes.
They were here. They were actually here.
I ran toward them, throwing myself into my mom’s arms. She laughed, holding me tightly.
“Happy birthday, baby girl,” she said, her voice warm and familiar.
“How did you…?” I looked over my shoulder at Paige, who shrugged innocently.
“Had a little help,” she said, grinning.
Paige's POV
Watching Y/N light up as her family surprised her was worth all the sneaking around and late-night planning. The crowd cheered as they hugged her, and I felt a swell of pride knowing we’d pulled it off.
After halftime, Y/N’s family joined us in the stands, and she stayed close to them for the rest of the game, though her eyes kept finding mine across the court.
When the buzzer sounded, signaling our win, the team swarmed Y/N again, chanting “Happy Birthday” as loudly and obnoxiously as possible.
Reader's POV
Back at Paige’s dorm that evening, we sat around eating cake with my family, laughing and reminiscing. Granny was telling Paige an embarrassing story from my childhood, and I couldn’t stop smiling.
Later, after my parents and granny went back to their hotel, Paige and I curled up on her bed, the glow of the fairy lights casting soft shadows on the walls.
“Did you have a good birthday?” she asked, brushing a strand of hair from my face.
“The best,” I said, leaning into her touch.
“Good,” she said, pressing a kiss to my temple. “You deserve it. No let me make it great.”
Sitting up I lift my hoodie off her to reveal she only had my hoodie no shirt under, a smirk grow on my face as my hand slides into her shorts, I rub my hand over her soaked panty clothed pussy. “Your body's doin this all f'me, mamas.” I smirk at the friction of her thighs squeezing my hand.“Nghh,” she whimper. “Look at you, I haven’t even stuffed you full of my fingers yet and you’re just falling apart, f'me.” I whisper into her ear before leaving more hickeys on her collarbone.
Now hovering over her I gently reach for the band of her shorts and panties pulling then down, in a swift motion. I git lower for her pussy letting a string of spit fall onto her pussy as I start rubbing her clit painfully slow. She opens her mouth to respond but all that comes out of it are soft moans and whimpers,  shaking her head. “Use your words mamas, what do you want, hmm.” I tease, fingers dancing around her clenching hole.
The room fills with her cries and moans. “Shh, shh you hear her talking back to me princess?” I say using my thumb to rub slow circles on her clit.“P-please Paige need your fing-” she moan as I bury my fingers into her sopping pussy, makong her breath hitch.
My fingers curl upwards and her eyes roll back, “Found it.”
I say as I speed up, rubbing circles into her pulsing clit, my fingers feeling her tethering closer and closer to the edge.
Her head lolls back into the pillow “M'Pagie, fuck, P.” My fingers continue rubbing the spongey spot “Look at me, birthday girl” I slow my pace a little, “Ma,look at me.” I  order, she looked at me, her eyes glossed over indicating that she was close.
She squirm and whine at the feeling of my fingers inside her dripping pussy speed up. Her mouth opens into an o shape at the filthy squelches that were filling up the room.“Paige, P.” she whimper helplessly. “I know baby, I can feel you squeezing my fingers, make a mess on my fingers mamas,” I says leaning into her biting, sucking at her neck, my cold silver chain dangling and grazing her hot sticky skin. Speeding my pace as I look at her holding eye contact, but before she warn me, she's cumming all over my fingers the white of her eyes the only thing visible.
She grip my arm for support as her legs become shaky. “I- mmm” her orgasm soon passes and I crawl off the bed to my knees, spreading her legs wider.
Gently I blow on her sensitive puffy clit, just before I'm slurping up her release moaning and groaning, holding her hips as she wiggling around from how sensitive she was now. “Mmm, baby you gotta be still m’tryna eat.” she gasp, gripping my hair as I'm practically french kissing her pussy.“So sensitive, f'me ma.” she whimper as she tugged harder on my hair. “I know baby but you can give me one more right?” I  says pulling away looking up at her.
My mouth glistening with her wetness as its dripping down my chin, I give her lower lips a kiss “Can’t you, ma?” I says before biting and sucking at her inner thighs.
Her hands are pulling me closer and I took that as his sign to continue.
Devouring her, my grip around her thighs tighten as I submerge his face into her pussy deepee, my nose ever so slightly grazing against her swollen clit.“Oh my god,” her moans grow louder as her orgasm gets closer, my hand reaches and presses down on her lower stomach.
She let's out a strangled cry out as a clear liquid shoots out of her pussy, her body convulsing as I look at her in shock. “Fuck, mamas."
Reader's pov
I was still catching my breath, my chest rising and falling as I stared at the ceiling of Paige’s bedroom. The room was dimly lit, the faint glow from the string lights casting soft shadows on the walls. Beside me, Paige was propped up on her elbow, her fingers tracing random patterns along my arm.
“You okay, baby?” she asked, her voice soft and teasing.
I nodded quickly, my cheeks heating up. “Yeah… I’m fine.”
“Fine?” she repeated, her tone dripping with amusement. “You sure? Because you’re acting all shy again.”
I groaned, burying my face into the pillow. “Stop it, Paige.”
She laughed, leaning down to kiss the top of my head. “What? It’s cute. You’re cute.”
“I’m not cute,” I mumbled, my voice muffled by the pillow.
“Hmm,” Paige hummed, pretending to think. “I don’t know. You were looking pretty cute about ten minutes ago.”
“Paige!” I whined, turning to glare at her, though the blush on my cheeks betrayed any attempt at seriousness.
“What?” she said innocently, her smile growing. “It’s your birthday, princess. I’m just giving you all the compliments you deserve.”
“You’re ridiculous,” I muttered, but I couldn’t stop the small smile that crept onto my lips.
“And you’re perfect,” she shot back, leaning in to press a kiss to my cheek.
I tried to roll away from her, but Paige was quicker, her arms wrapping around my waist to pull me back toward her.
“Nope, you’re not getting away that easily,” she said, her voice playful.
“Paige, let me go!” I protested, though my laughter betrayed me.
“Not a chance, ma,” she said, her lips brushing against my ear. “You’re stuck with me.”
A little while later, Paige got up from the bed, pulling on her hoodie as she walked toward the bathroom.
“Where are you going?” I asked, propping myself up on my elbow to watch her.
She glanced back at me with a smirk. “Running you a bath. You deserve it, birthday girl.”
My heart swelled at the gesture, and I sat up, wrapping the blanket around myself. “You don’t have to do that.”
“I want to,” she said simply, disappearing into the bathroom.
I heard the sound of water running and the faint clinking of bottles as she prepared the bath. A few minutes later, she reappeared, leaning against the doorframe with a satisfied look.
“Your bath is ready, princess,” she said, holding out her hand.
I took it, letting her guide me into the bathroom. The tub was filled with warm water, bubbles spilling over the edges. A few candles were lit on the counter, their soft glow making the room feel cozy and intimate.
“Paige, this is amazing,” I said, turning to look at her.
She shrugged, a small smile playing on her lips. “Only the best for my girl.”
I leaned up to kiss her, my lips lingering on hers. “Thank you.”
“Anything for you,” she murmured against my lips.
I stepped into the tub, sinking into the warm water with a content sigh. Paige knelt beside the tub, her chin resting on the edge as she watched me.
“You’re not joining me?” I asked, raising an eyebrow.
She chuckled. “You want me to?”
“Yes,” I said without hesitation, giving her a pointed look.
Paige stood up, pulling off her hoodie and stepping out of her shorts. “Alright, scoot up, baby.”
I moved forward to make room for her, and she climbed in behind me, her arms wrapping around my waist as I leaned back against her.
“This is nice,” I said softly, closing my eyes as the warmth of the water and Paige’s presence enveloped me.
“Yeah, it is,” she agreed, pressing a kiss to my shoulder. “Happy birthday, ma.”
We stayed like that for what felt like hours, the bubbles slowly disappearing and the water cooling. Paige’s hands moved lazily over my arms, her touch soothing and gentle.
“Do you ever think about the future?” I asked suddenly, my voice barely above a whisper.
“All the time,” Paige said without hesitation. “Especially with you.”
I turned my head slightly to look at her. “What do you mean?”
She smiled, her blue eyes meeting mine. “I mean I think about us. Where we’ll be in a few years, what kind of life we’ll have together. I want it all with you, baby.”
My heart skipped a beat, and I felt my cheeks heat up again. “You’re too good to me, Paige.”
“You deserve it, plus you're good to me too” she said simply, leaning in to kiss my temple.
The room fell into a comfortable silence again, the only sounds being the faint dripping of water and our steady breathing.
Eventually, the water grew too cold, and Paige nudged me gently. “Come on, princess. Let’s get out before you turn into an ice cube.”
I nodded, letting her help me out of the tub. She wrapped a towel around me, drying me off with care before doing the same for herself.
Back in the bedroom, Paige handed me one of her oversized shirts to wear, and I climbed into bed, feeling warm and content.
She joined me a moment later, pulling me close and tucking the blanket around us.
“Best birthday ever,” I murmured, my head resting on her chest.
Paige chuckled, her fingers running through my hair. “Glad I could make it special, baby. You deserve the world.”
And as I drifted off to sleep in her arms, I couldn’t help but think that maybe I already had it.
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       -Thank You For Reading!🩵🩶
                             -prettygirl-gabi🎀✨️
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Tag list: @sayurireidotcom , @astroeliza , @paxaz535 , @0phantom0 , @starlighttsv , @authentic-girl03 , @sevyscoven .... (more to be added)
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bunny-jpeg · 7 months ago
Note
Hey! May I please have mille-feuille with coffee and a shot of vodka, with Carlos? Love the bakery concept!
the bakery menu
the bakery is still open! feel free to check out the main post and get your own order today! as for this, thank you so much for the order! i've been finding that a lot of people have a sweet sport for mr. sainz, haha! especially the rivals trope! i wanted to make this a little different from the other rivals concept i was suggested! thank you! thank you! thank you!
mille-feuille (“that’s it, fuck, that’s a good girl.”) + coffee (rivals) + shot of vodka (rough sex)
cw: smut/pwp, rivals au, rough sex, bratty!reader, punishments, brat taming, driver!reader & driver!carlos, mean!reader & carlos, drunk sex, alcohol & drinking, biting/hickies
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everyone did rivals in formula one. it was the alluring storyline for the watcher. but to do it with the first permanent female driver in a long time was maybe not the most wise choice. you were the people's princess of formula one racing.
a voice for all women who wanted to make their mark in the sport. a beacon of light, a shining example of a great driver. to hate you to an extent, was a hate towards all women.
carlos wanted you to shut that little mouth of yours.
"oh yeah, carlos? you think that you could make a woman cum? be fucking for real." you howled in laughter. there weren't many drivers left in the bar.
he had his cheek pressed against his hand as he took another sip of his beer, "you don't think i could make a woman cum?"
you shrugged, "i don't think you could if you tried. like you'd get between her legs and look confused. i'm pretty sure you could name all the parts of your car easier than you could the anatomy of a woman."
your teammate, max cut in with his hand on your shoulder, "i think you need to let this go." you looked at him and he was painfully drunk as well.
you turned back to the ferrari driver.
carlos looked to his own teammate, charles, who at some point put his face on the wooden table and just fallen asleep. carlos said to you, "see, your point is so boring it put charles to sleep."
you didn't have a verbal comeback so you just flipped him off. and did carlos want to pin you down to the nearest surface and spank the hell out of your ass, get that bratty attitude out of you
you and carlos continued to bicker, your volume only getting louder with the deeper the conversation went and the more drunk you got.
max stared up at the ceiling for a moment and sighed. in his own drunken state he said, "why don't you two go back to your hotel, and see. and you can report back to us tomorrow."
"that sounds fair." carlos said.
you raised an eyebrow, "you're going to make me cum, carlos?" then tipped your head to the side.
carlos smiled, "well, of course. shouldn't be too hard. or are you worried you might be wrong?"
you reached across the table to carlos and he met you halfway to shake your hand, "may the best driver win then, sainz."
"you too." he said with a knowing smirk.
-
when you ended up in your hotel room, his lips were on yours. his large hands were palming your breasts through your redbull branded t-shirt. he pulled away and pressed his forehead against yours, "we're not stopping until you cum or the sun comes up."
you laughed and held his face to look at you, "well then, i hope you enjoy driving tomorrow with no sleep." then you went back to viciously making out with him.
his hands were on your hips soon after, trying to get your pants off of you. he groaned against your lips and muttered something to himself before you two broke away and you started to get undressed. even the amount of kissing felt too intimate for your liking.
"i hope you're okay with racing with a sore back." carlos replied as he got his shirt off. he caught you admiring him for a moment, which only inflated his ego before the rest of the clothes came off.
your brain was a buzz as you got all your clothes off and stood there naked in the hotel room. "how are we gonna do this?" you asked with your arms across your chest.
carlos took in the sight of you, "well, how does the princesa feel about being on her hands and knees. or is she too good for that?"
"you're a dick, carlos."
"i'm a dick!" he said as he got closer to you, "you're a little brat. like a snippy little dog that's always gotten her way. i think you made those comments so you could have sex with me."
"i could kill you."
"but you'll fuck me instead right, princesa?"
you two ended up on the bed, but carlos had to strength to pin you down on your knees with your front pushed into the pillows. he put your arms behind your back to keep you still.
"hitting me was not in the deal." he remarked, his voice close to your ear. his erection rubbed up against your slick pussy. you liked this, you liked when he bit back.
maybe that's what you were a little dog looking for something or someone to put you in your place.
"i'm not gonna cum like this." you said.
"i think you're wrong there. i think you are really liking this." he said, his tone was venomous that sent lust through you. you hated how good he sounded.
he sank his cock into you without much fanfare, “that’s it, fuck, that’s a good girl.”
"shut up, sainz." you groaned as you felt him bound by his hand on your wrists. the other hand on your hip to give him leverage to fuck your sweet cunt.
the thrusts of his hips were hard and pushed you further into the pillows. your back arched and you whined into the pillows. you felt heat in your cheeks as he quickly fucked you.
it was rough, it was messy as the sounds of your bodies moved out of sync on the bed. it was a power struggle that carlos was winning. you hated that there was pleasure pooling in your body the more he thrusted into you.
he held you by the arms and bullied his cock into you. he was easily using you like a toy and all you had was your iron resolve that you wouldn't cum. but as you felt the dampness of sweat on your neck and the heat between your legs, it was getting harder.
"do you like that?" he asked as he continued to fuck you, "oh, is someone mad that they're liking this?" usually he tried to romance his sexual partners, but it was hard when he had so much liquor in his system. you two were filthy fucking, it was messy and hot. he could feel the sweat on his skin as he continued to thrust up into you.
"fuck you, carlos." you tilted your head back to look at him. the angle made you get a head rush.
he curled further over you and heavily made out with you. you whined at the stretch and it made you core hot. you could feel the tightness in your stomach as he fucking demolished you.
when the kiss broke you dropped your head back down onto the bed and let him keep you pinned down. he continued to move, eventually finding a place to leave bites on your neck.
you whined and said, "oh fuck, you possessive fuck!" you squirmed but couldn't get too far.
"i want them to know what i've done to you. i want charles and max to see the marks tomorrow morning and know exactly what we did."
"please, carlos. shit, shit." you panted. you couldn't really think straight anymore. in the attempt to deny your own orgasm, you were lost in the pleasure.
"i knew it." he said, "i knew you'd love this. fuck, i knew it." he panted as he felt his own orgasm come to a head. he almost bottomed out into you.
something inside of you broke as you felt the orgasm crash over you. there was no holding it back. you laid there slacked jaw and let carlos continue to fuck you until he pulled out and finished on your back.
he didn't want to give you the pleasure of him dumping his cum into you. maybe next time. if you were good. he slowed down to a stop and chuckled to himself, "you came."
"shut up."
"you finished. i knew you did."
"i could've been faking." you fought back.
"no, no." he said as he grabbed tissues off the nightstand to at least clean you up, "i know that was real, i won our little bet."
you huffed, not happy that you lost, "best two out of three." you remarked. it was almost childish, but you refused to lose to carlos sainz jr.
-
the following morning, you refused to look your teammate in the eye. even at the media pen. max noticed that the collar of your shirt was a little higher than how you normally kept it. but when you went to scratch the side of you neck, he get a glimpse of the damage that carlos had done.
max mentally cursed and tried to remember how much cash was in his wallet. he owed charles some money. at least you were a lot more nicer at the paddock that morning, so maybe he should be thanking carlos.
you looked over to max and raised your eyes at him. max gestured to your neck and you made a face before you mouth, "speak and you're dead." before you were all smiles to the camera.
this wouldn't be the last time max would find marks on your neck. and years later he'd have to act surprise when it came out you were dating carlos.
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targaryenluvs · 1 year ago
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OMG HUNGER GAMES!!!
Can i ask for a finnick odair with a winner female reader who she avoids but he is obsessed with and wants to marry in front of the whole capitol
Some dark-ish fluff
WANT AND DESIRE!
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pairings: dark!finnick odair x fem!reader
warnings: obession, stalking, nc kissing, forced engagement???
summary: you’d thought you’d escaped the capitol, and to some extent, him, the ever so sweet and charming finnick odair. but it seems your fate had been signed as it seemed you couldn’t get away from him no matter how hard you tried.
a/n: i actual hate writing dark stuff cuz i never know if it’s decent, I DO FLUFF GUYS WE CAN TAKE THAT ROUTE 😭 NOT PROOF READ
you wondered what you were going to get.
all the pastries infront of you were mouthwatering and the aroma had your stomach growling.
“i’d recommend the dark chocolate cakes, they practically melt in your mouth. but maybe something as sweet as you wants a change?” and there it was, the voice and person you’d hoped to avoid. at such a large capitol party your hopes were high but it seemed as if the man had a radar, with your name on it.
“finnick, how are you?” you feigned interest as you turned his way.
“better, now that i’ve seen you.” he beamed at you, undeniably happy. it’s not as if you weren’t interesting at all, or ugly, but you truly had no idea why he was so infatuated with you. you’d never given him any signs, or at least you didn’t think you had, you’d hardly ever talked to him. even if everybody loved him, you could tell something, was off.
“how sweet of you. there are so many people here, best if i try my best to meet as many as possible, have a nice night finnick.” you dismissed him as you placed the cake down, yes it was petty but the fact that he’d suggested eating it deterred you even more-so than it’s insanely sickening contents. “i’ll come with you, the people would love it. the capitols diamond and darling. there’s not a single pair of victors as great of a duo as us sweetheart.”
and as he linked your arms together, you were off. you thought it’d be better to just go with him, stand and smile as he talked. it would give you a slight break at least, but after so much time greeting people your face was threatening to fall apart. so after an hour or so you’d excused yourself to the bathrooms, unknowing of the blonde on your trail.
“are you okay y/n?” finnicks voice asked sweetly as you lowered the towel you were using to pat down your face. “what’re you doing in here? the party’s down stairs finnick.” what did he want? you are so fucking tired of this party and just wanted to leave, you’d been here for hours already, long enough to know that it’d be appropriate to do so. and you may or may not have wanted to put as many kilometres between yourself and finnick. “i just wanted to make sure you were okay, everyone’s asking for us.”
“you, they’re asking for you. i���ve been here for a while, everyone’s seen me. you haven’t, they want you. and if you’d mind letting me exit.” as you tried to move past your wrist was caught in his tight grip. “they want to see us both sweetheart, trust me, we’re much better together. can’t you see? all of the capitol loves us together, even the districts.”
“i don’t care, if i’m going to marry someone it’ll be someone i actually like.” the door slammed shut as you walked away from him. finnick laughed, if there was thing he loved about you, it was your short temper. he walked after you, his hand clutching the velvet box in his pant pocket, he was going to propose one day, why not now?
as you made your way through the place, fake smiles aimed at everyone, finnick caught up to you. “y/n, please.” you turned around, “what? what is it?” you shouted as the party’s attention zeroed in on the two of you. you could her muttering of the people and shuttering of cameras.
this bitch.
he was down on one knee, a huge diamond ring rested in the middle of a box. his eyes glistened, teary eyed. was this dickhead really crying? as if he’d waited his whole life for this moment. “finnick-” you warned as you raised your hand, only for him to grab it and pull himself up. people were cheering and clapping as he wrapped his arms around you.
“i have loved you, since the moment i saw you. everything about you is my favourite thing, your smile, your laugh, your eyes- your gorgeous, gorgeous eyes. there’s no part of me that could go on without you. i love you so much sweetheart, so please put me out of my misery and marry me, you’re the only person i could ever imagine myself with.”
say yes!
what a lucky girl!
i knew they’d get together.
the crowd around you egged you on to accept. how could you not? finnick odair, tribute, youngest victor, terribly handsome and the capitols darling. a catch in everyone’s eyes but they couldn’t be further from the truth. a man who’d purposefully proposed infront of the capitol, knowing you could never say no. god knows what snow would do to you, let alone the capitol for breaking their favourites heart. you weren’t worried for yourself too much, you’d been a hollow shell ever since your games, but your family? your parents and siblings didn’t deserve to be killed.
“i know you’re in shock sweetheart, but i’ll take that as a yes.” finnick kissed your forehead and then slid the ring onto your finger.
the crowd is deafening and the flashes blinding.
and as he kissed you again, you couldn’t help yourself from crying. as everyone viewed it as tears of joy for being in love but you knew the truth about finnicks love for you. there was none.
just want and desire.
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httpvomitello · 1 month ago
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Cold Heart *⁠.⁠✧
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cregan stark x f!reader
WARNING: angst, not a happy ending(?)
(part 2)
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The Great Hall of Winterfell was silent, save for the crackle of the fire and the howl of the wind outside. You stood near the long table, your hands clenched into fists, trembling with the weight of emotions too long suppressed.
Cregan stared at you from across the room, his face set in that unyielding northern mask you had come to hate. He was always calm, always composed, as if nothing you could ever say or do would penetrate the ice around his heart.
But you had had enough.
“You treat me like a commoner, Cregan!” you spat, your voice echoing off the stone walls.
His brows furrowed slightly, the only indication that your outburst had caught him off guard.
“I am the daughter of the Queen of Westeros,” you continued, stepping closer, your voice rising with every word. “And if you do not see me as an equal, then may the Gods cancel our wedding now! I’m tired of being seen as a nobody!”
The anger in your voice reverberated through the hall, a fire against the icy indifference that had dominated your marriage. You could feel your chest heaving, your cheeks burning with the force of your frustration.
Cregan did not respond immediately. He simply looked at you, his expression unreadable, as if weighing whether or not your words deserved a response.
Finally, he spoke, his voice low and steady, like the rumble of distant thunder.
“You think I treat you like a commoner?” he asked, his tone as cold as the air around you. “You are my wife, the Lady of Winterfell. Is that not enough for you?”
“No, it is not!” you snapped, your nails digging into your palms. “I came here with love in my heart, with hope for a life with you. And you—” Your voice broke, but you forced yourself to continue. “You treat me like I am nothing more than a political pawn, a woman to warm your bed and raise your son.”
His jaw tightened, but his eyes remained locked on yours. “What would you have me do, then?”
“See me,” you said, your voice trembling with both anger and despair. “See me as a person, not as her replacement. Stop looking through me as if I am invisible.”
Cregan exhaled sharply, turning away to pace the room. “You think this is easy for me?” he asked, his voice rising for the first time. “Do you think I wanted to remarry so soon after losing Arra? That I wanted to bring another woman into my son’s life, into my home?”
The mention of her name sent a fresh stab of pain through your chest, but you stood your ground.
“No, I don’t think it’s easy,” you said, your voice quieter now but no less firm. “But I didn’t ask for this either, Cregan. I didn’t ask to be sent here to marry a man who can’t even look at me without seeing her ghost.”
He stopped pacing, his back to you, his shoulders stiff. For a moment, the only sound was the wind howling against the castle walls.
When he finally turned to face you, his expression was unreadable once more, his voice quieter but no less sharp.
“You speak of ghosts,” he said. “But you forget that this marriage was built on them. On duty, not love. If you came here expecting more, then you were a fool.”
The words hit like a blow, stealing the breath from your lungs. You staggered slightly, but you refused to let him see the full extent of your hurt.
“Perhaps I was a fool,” you said, your voice barely above a whisper. “But I loved you, Cregan. I loved you before I even knew what love was. And now… now I see that it was never enough.”
You turned on your heel and walked out of the hall, the sound of your boots on the stone floor echoing behind you. You didn’t wait to see if he would call after you, didn’t look back to see if he watched you go.
You already knew the answer.
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The castle felt emptier than ever as you retreated to your chambers, slamming the heavy wooden door behind you. The fire in the hearth burned low, casting flickering shadows across the walls.
You sank onto the bed, your head in your hands, tears streaming down your face. You had laid your heart bare, and in return, Cregan had torn it apart with his cold, unyielding truths.
For so long, you had held on to the hope that things would change, that time and patience would thaw the ice between you. But now, for the first time, you wondered if you had been wrong all along.
Winter was eternal in the North, and perhaps so was the coldness in Cregan Stark’s heart.
You lay there for what felt like hours, your tears soaking into the furs. Outside, the wind howled louder, as if mourning with you.
And somewhere in the depths of Winterfell, Cregan Stark sat alone, staring into the fire as he always did, his silence speaking volumes.
Neither of you would sleep that night. And neither of you would speak of this moment again.
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moonlight-alexia · 2 months ago
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just two friends | s.c.
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steph catley x mccabe!reader | 1.2k | 'why are you here? I thought you’d want to be out with your friends right now,’ + ‘there’s no one else that makes me laugh the way you do,’
ˏˋ°•*⁀ this is part of the enchanted to meet you universe. this is before lil mac and steph start dating, when they're 'just two friends'
❆♡────୨ holiday season blurb event ৎ────♡❆
‘Where’s Steph?’ You leaned over asking your sister. You were currently out at dinner with Katie, some of the arsenal girls and some of the London based Aussies. Since joining Arsenal you’d become quite close with the defender quite quickly so Steph’s absence to things like this definitely didn’t go unnoticed by you. 
‘Said she wasn’t feeling well so stayed home instead,’ Katie shrugged and went back to her conversation with some of the others at the table. You frowned slightly. Besides seeing each other at training, you were still settling into Katie’s spare room, which was still a mess and she’d been getting on your back about cleaning it up, so you hadn’t spent as much time with Steph as you would’ve liked.
But hearing that she wasn’t feeling well made your stomach drop, you hadn’t experienced this feeling in a while, but you knew that you definitely didn’t like hearing that Steph wasn’t well. After that you weren’t really enjoying yourself all that much. Kind of just listening in to the conversations around you but not really contributing much.
You were just thinking of if there was anything you could do to help make Steph feel better, ‘Are you okay?’ Katie noticed how quiet you’d gotten, it was easy to get lost with a group of loud individuals but it was different and of course your sister could tell. You hated it but she’d always be the first one to notice any change in mood or if you weren’t your usual self.
‘I’m not feeling that great, maybe I’ll head off,’ You felt bad for lying and you did love spending time with everyone and meeting more of your sister's friends and joining in, but there was somewhere else you wanted to be.
‘Yeah we don’t wanna catch whatever you’ve got,’ Katie dramatically leaned away from you, joking around. 
As soon as you said your goodbyes and left the restaurant, you pulled up your notes app, opening the only one you had locked. A bit after you met Steph and started spending more time with her you started to note down every little thing about Steph. Things she liked and disliked, her favourite things like food, drinks, flowers and so much more. You hadn’t really thought much about it and why you were doing it. But you didn’t do it to this same extent for any of your other friends. Only for Steph.
Pushing those thoughts out of your mind, you juggled the bags in your hand making your way to the front door of the apartment you’ve found yourself in many times, sharing many different moments with your friend. You knocked on the door and came face to face with the one person you’d been missing lately.
The surprise was evident on Steph’s face. She definitely didn’t expect you to be at her front door, especially knowing everyone else was still out at dinner. The surprised expression turned into a small smile and an amused laugh watching you struggle with the bags while giving Steph the biggest smile, your eyes lighting up at the sight of her.
‘Why are you here? I thought you’d want to be out with your friends right now,’ Steph asked, shutting the door after letting you in. Settling the bags in the kitchen you frowned a little at the slight rasp and croak in Steph’s voice. 
‘You’re my friend too you know,’ You smiled small, fidgeting with the bags, ‘Heard you weren’t well and wanted to try and help you feel better,’ Shrugging like it was no big deal or anything, ‘I got you all your favourites,’ Steph moved closer, watching over your shoulder as you unpacked the bags onto the bench, showing her every little thing that you’d gotten. Until you suddenly closed the bag so Steph couldn’t see anymore, ‘Close your eyes,’ 
Steph raised her eyebrow in interest, once her eyes were closed you got the little surprise out of the bag, turned around so you were facing her and held it up, ‘Alright you can open them,’ You didn’t know if it was silly, but the way Steph’s eyes softened and she took the little dog plush from your hands, you knew that she didn’t think it was a stupid idea, ‘You can name it and then when you’re not feeling well or need company and I can’t be here then you’ll have him,’ 
‘Thank you,’ Steph whispered, wrapping her arms around your neck, pulling you in for a hug. The length of the hug went unnoticed by either of you, both just caught up in each other's presence. The way Steph’s arms wrapped around you felt comfortable and natural, ‘Think I’ll name him Calvin. Little Calvy,’ Steph pulled back a bit, one arm still wrapped around you, the other holding the little dog plush in between the two of you. Your arms still wrapped around Steph.
That little dog plush, Steph would always keep with her. Little Calvin would go on the long haul flights whenever Steph went back to Australia on her own, for camp or visiting family. The reason why you both ended up choosing the dog you did a few years later when you knew it was the right moment to get a dog together. Little Calvin, Big Calvin.
You cooked the two of you dinner, while you tried to keep Steph resting on the couch in a bundle of blankets. But she didn’t want to be far from you so you settled on her staying in the kitchen as long as she was staying wrapped up in the blanket, you didn’t want her cold to get worse. You both settled into the couch afterwards, Steph’s head leaning on your shoulder, your arm wrapped around her waist. 
Comfortably watching a movie, how it always seemed to be, the two of you had gotten close quite fast and neither of you ever second guessed your actions with each other. Everything always just happened naturally and felt normal and right to do. 
‘If I was getting eaten by a bear, I’d definitely try to get a pat in,’ Your voice broke through the sound of the movie on the tv. 
‘What do you mean?’ Steph laughed out in slight disbelievement, definitely amused at your comment.
‘I mean, bears look so soft and cuddly and if I had the chance to pat one I would take it,’ The seriousness to your voice, the slight side smile, Steph laughed out even more shaking her head at you, ‘That feels like a pretty good opportunity to give them a little pat,’ 
‘You’re such an idiot,’ Steph leaned her forehead down against your shoulder while she just kept laughing. You joined in, your smile big.
‘What? You wouldn’t take the chance to pat them?’ You spoke between taking breaths from laughing.
‘If I was getting eaten by a bear, I definitely would not be thinking about giving it a pat,’ The laughter shared between the two of you could be heard throughout the entire apartment building, Once the laughter had died down, heavy breaths were taken while you both tried to catch your breath again after laughing so hard for so long.
‘Honestly,’ Steph’s voice, much more raspy now than before, ‘There’s no one else that makes me laugh the way you do,’ Your eyes connected and both your smiles easily reached your eyes. Eyes, Steph’s eyes that now twinkled with a glimmer of something you weren’t quite sure of but it made your stomach flutter a little bit.
‘You have a pretty laugh,’ You whispered, taking a deep breath, you pulled Steph closer and you both settled again how you were before, eyes back on the movie, ‘I like making you laugh,’ 
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