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notsocheezy · 4 months ago

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Brain Curd #126 - Poetry Precursor #2

Brain Curds are lightly edited flash fiction poetry - practically first drafts - posted daily (haven't missed one yet!) and sometimes written with the express intention of being terrible… but, you know, in an endearing way. Please like and reblog if you enjoy - the notes keep me going!

Wait

Clinging to body-pillow relief,

Dreamt fantasies of another me,

Here to comfort my aching soul

Naked as the day birthed

And just as filthy, sweating,

Tossing, turning, spinning, burning,

She too, I see with horror,

Bears the unwanted gift

And hides in unspoken words

So I recoil, distant on the mattress,

Her dark eyes dissolving unto me,

Will it happen again, that the nightmare will not be over?

You out there, in the world which frightens me to wake;

You in the distant days, know what I say as I type:

In a week and a seventh, I shall be dead or headless.

No more.

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lockandkeycake · 9 months ago

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Whenever Leo's got dating woes he goes to Will, and by extension, Nico. You'd think he'd ask Piper, but they've been a bit awkward after Jason died. Reyna isn't really a help either, though she tries. Hazel and Frank are a no-go too because that whole situation is still weird. Leo is still scared of Percy so absolutely not going to ask him. Which leaves Will and Nico, much to Nico's chagrin.

#leo valdez #nico di angelo #will solace #solangelo #it's multiple years of 'Calypso and i broke up - nvm we're back on'#'i think I'm bi wait no I'm definitely straight no wait maybe I'm gay no I'm not but maybe or maybe-'#and Nico just can't handle it anymore

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keeps-ache · 6 days ago

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i think i'm starting to really like writing again :D this will have consequences

#just me hi #oho so my beloved is back from the war huh [<- had locked the doors and windows to keep its 'beloved' out and forgot about it]#that old itch to just start slapping sounds i know on a doc and hoping in 3 days it still makes sense is back lol :3 #/can't read the last thing i wrote yet cuz it hasn't been three days </3 #rule is i have to spend the same amount of time away from it as i spent working on it. including editing. sad!#it Does help my brain reset though. and forget about literally everything bfhvsjgh #and i know it's possible for me to finish this kinda stuff now so like. Woho !!#the power. the Powerrrr #/also tryna get more comfortable with sharing my writing so i'm starting by sending small finished stuff to like 2 people i trust kfvshg #i can handle unwarranted critiques of my art but i am not at a stage for my writing where it won't cause like international #devastation and that's goofy so Pfvhsh 👍#we're working on it :)#and i think people's reactions are amusing so ehehehghehghgehg :3 a bonus :33 #//yea though i'm gonna go put some more obleas in the freezer #obleeeeeeeeaaaa can't wait to seeeee yaaaaaa. on. my. Plaaaaate #btw shoutout to eating a spoonful of cajeta at like 1 in the morning thinking everyone's asleep and then you look up and younger #sibling no. 4 is there staring dead into your eyeballs like. is there anymore #and you go uhhh yea. and then as he's walking around to get some younger sibling no. 3 rises up from seemingly nowhere like I Want Some Too #lmfshvhf #and then you're all just sitting up for about 2 more hours just talking about very dumb things and having cajeta. illegally but still hfbvh #//anyway i'm gonna depart now :) ciao toodles lol :3

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yongbbokkie · 1 month ago

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this last month I've been anticipating what Chris would do for his next solo stage, how he would one-up the last one, coz he's been steadily escalating every show... first the scratches, then he added chains, then the fucking handprints that I will NEVER get over............. so I've been trying to figure out what he'd do next, and I'll be honest, I couldn't see how he'd get much more explicit than HANDPRINTS.

but no. he did.

and this has opened up a whole world of new possibilities

Christopher. Sir. Please.

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softpine · 2 years ago

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hacker voice we’re in

#i can't wait anymore i told my family i have work to do and disappeared so i could play fjksdjs #casper is just a toddler for now and i'm gonna cheat and make caroline be pregnant so i can get the full infant experience #the existential horror of being a sim who wakes up one day and is suddenly in the 3rd trimester of a pregnancy that never existed before #like that woman from severance 😔#i haven't decided yet if i want to put them in 1 lot with 2 houses or make them all live separately #idk how much stress i want to deal with lmao #i already had to delete poor mac </3 i cannot handle a cat and a new life stage all at once #anyway i'm probably not going to post any pictures #except maybe i'll do one big compilation #i just want to have fun and not focus on making things look pretty #anyway!!!! goodbye i'm gonna go play!!#pregnancy tw #growing together gameplay

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thedeviljudges · 4 months ago

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the mental health issues your mother causes should fr be studied; from the guilt tripping to holding onto the victim mentality for dear life to being so inconsiderate.

#x #im so tired of it #it wasn't an issue growing up not really #but as a gen x she's become a boomer as she's gotten older and i can't stand it #don't get me started on the father issues that's a whole other thing #i cannot wait to move out im over it #i'm over her always in my business or asking for money or taking/using my stuff without asking #then getting upset that im upset and always asking if something is wrong but knowing if you say anything she'll get mad #so you can't really talk about anything #and there's so much more but im so mentally drained and im at the point where i dont want to be around her at all #but she's already started the 'will i ever see you once you move out' and i cannot handle the guilt trip anymore #im at the point where i could cry daily from anger tbh #she's the reason i couldn't move out in my 20s and that's a whole other piece of trauma to work through now lmao

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tiny-feisty-gay · 6 months ago

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jobs will say they're disability friendly until you actually need them to be friendly about your disabilities

jobs will say they're mental health friendly until you actually have to miss work for it

jobs will say they support you taking time off until you actually do it

capitalism is a sham and employers do not and will not ever care about you, and if you're chronically ill, sucks to suck

i have an average of 1.5 absences a month and i'm tardy an average of twice a month, and somehow that's still too much.

18 absences in a year if i go at the current rate. 18. out of the 208 days total that i work (4 on, 3 off, with a 3 hour commute each direction.) 18. days. of absences. and that's too many.

and god forbid i be more than 15 minutes late.

#it's because we're horrifically understaffed #animal rescue is understaffed and underpaid and burnt the fuck out #but where else am i gonna go #back to retail? my body can't take that anymore #a decade of 8 hours a day on my feet has quite literally crippled me #i called out today because i dared to have fun over my weekend and my hip pain flared so badly that i couldn't put weight on it #i should stay home and rest it tomorrow too #but i'm not #because my boss already texted me today to inform me that my absences are “alarmingly too frequent” and “becoming problematic”#i took fmla for a month and a half last year because i couldn't handle existing #i've been back for 3 months #my shelter laid off 15% of our staff within a month of me returning #critical teams were cut entirely #and my team #the adoptions team #has seven people total #that's not enough #that isn't NEARLY enough #not for an animal shelter of our size and animal volume #that's why me calling out is “problematic”#because HR won't greenlight us for more positions #because of a problem THE CEO caused by driving us into the ground financially #and if i leave i have to start all over somewhere else #i have to wait a year to be eligible for fmla at a new job #i lose my benefits #i don't even know if i could FIND a job #the market is awful and i will literally collapse if i have to work a standing job again #i made it six months at my last one #because i was so dizzy and in so much pain all the time #undiagnosed issues of course

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celine-song · 1 year ago

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tetris the movie air jordans the movie blackberry the movie flamin hot cheetos the movie what on earth is going on

#not to sound pretentious but i literally can't handle modern cinema anymore what's all thissss #why are we making movies out of like. wikipedia articles #oh man can't wait for wikipedia: the movie

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moeatsushi · 2 years ago

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i watched the JRA collab episode like 3 times to get this frame in good quality and i can't find it....... this is actually driving me insane

#i need it in 1080p COME ON!!!!!!#once again stuck with crunchy background atsushis. tch #why does he stand like that. fuck you #why does he look smug hes literally just waiting to go to the bathroom. BE NORMAL #if its there i don't want to look for it anymore i can't handle another horse dick joke i'm at my limit #text

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arcadian-vampire · 2 years ago

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Wait I haven't played the beginning of Epic Seven in a while, it's different now!!!!! The parts about the Goddess in the intro definitely weren't there last time, and I'm pretty sure Aither's introduction is different too, though I guess I could've forgotten exactly how it went

There's also a new server, and new three-star units!! I guess I missed a lot in the short time I wasn't able to play :0

#aitherposts #aitherpl- wait that's not how the tag goes. i'm getting too used to the aither fool's day tag and it's been less than two hours. woopsie #pikaplays epic seven #i mean it might've been a few months that i couldn't play. i can't remember #i had to wait until i got a new phone because my old one couldn't handle e7 anymore :(#anyways the asia server separated into specific korea and japan servers now!! very neat

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vampiricsheep · 2 years ago

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i guess my sona can have a little hair as a treat

#just gotta make it big messy and dramatic lmao #hey yknow how o rings are coming back into style w/o consideration of the uh. whatever #dya think it'll happen to locks too #NOT PUTTING A LOCK COLLAR ON MY FURSONA TO BE CLEAR #ive just been waiting to see it happen #anyways. my collar has an o ring but you can't get a good and comfortable spike collar without them #besides. they're a little fun to show off #life got a thousand times better when i stopped worrying about dressing like this when i leave the house #eventually i'll wear tails again but i need to actually GET one 😭 the only one i have rn is a bunny #didn't take my old handmade wolf one with me when i hopped state #don't have a sewing machine that can handle fur (or any sewing machine) anymore tho #and i am NOT hand stitching something that big EVER again. ive don't #*ive done enough!

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adioxazine · 4 days ago

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vent in tags yeha

just don't read if you follow me for silly art

#tw very big vent #tw su1c1de #tw sh #i just. have not been doing so well.#it's just. so lonely i. don't know how to handle that really this has been going on for months #i can't even learn what it's like to actually feel pain #just. don't want to wake up tommorow. i don't want people to think about it. i want people to just go #'oh they died? okay then lmao'#i don't want anybody to care too much #everything hurts. i'm always going to end up alone #i don't want to wait anymore. because i don't know how it will get any better. i.#just some. weird kid to everybody #i'm. not made to be more than some annoying kid #that's. all i am. never nothing more than friends #i don't mean that as in i want to have a partner i mean that nobody considers me a best friend #all of my mutuals are cool however knowing what i do know we. just wouldn't really get along if we actually began talking regularly #i don't know how to find any new people anymore #i'm. sorry for saying all of this but i don't want to dump it onto the one person i've been practically forcing conversation with

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99naive · 26 days ago

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the eepies are all consuming but im now awake

#[ LOVE when my dad can't do the ONE THING he said he would do yesterday. ]#[ so i get woke up instead to go handle his shit . ]#[ cant WAIT till we get moved tf outta here & this isnt my life anymore !!! ]#˚₊·—̳͟͞♡ i. 𐙚 ooc. ᝰ .ᐟ . . . abi speaks ౨ৎ ˖ ࣪⊹ .#˚₊·—̳͟͞♡ i. 𐙚 ooc. ᝰ .ᐟ . . . mobile post ౨ৎ ˖ ࣪⊹ .

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hauntingblue · 2 months ago

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Skypiea time

Robin saying that because I know she only got on a ship to then leave it...

Nami sees Conis and gets sanji out of there so SHE can talk to her akdhksajka not a single second lost

Hello my favourite panel of nami maybe ever

Sillies...

CHOPPER YOU ARE THE CUTEST

Robin throws this guy off a cliff and to make just to make sure she breaks his neck too akdjsksk who is doing it like her???

OMG ACE!!!! IT IS TIME!!!!

#luffy being jealous of nami handling the waver.... sibling behaviour #so many robin chopper moments my god... and zoro still mistrusting here... the coparenting of chopper is just beggining #already needing a ship carpenter damn..... franky i miss you #robin saying to nami she is brave for jumping off the ship and then telling chopper to please be careful.... yeah.... 🥺#luffy saying that they will fall off the island if they take the wrong door and they immediately fall qldjsonwlssls #and luffy just says that was all usopp! we failed! and it is not shown but i know he is smiling #i have gotten used to seeing luffy with his shirt open and the x scar i got surprised when i realized he doesnt have it yet.... oof #the priests having “mantra” aka haki is so op for the second island like damn.. and they got BEAT.... losers #the city of gold aka vearth aka part of jaya went into the sky 400 years ago ✍️✍️#robin wanting to stop the campfire so they dont give away their position... she doesn't need to hide anymore!!! party time #life's 36 agonies... zoro is so deep when he wants to... also first pondo hou attack... why against thus random man tho akdjsksl #shandora fell 800 years ago ✍️✍️#laki.... and wiper ... this hit so much harder in the show tho.... my bad... maybe they put some flashbacks in here instead of wherever els #wait wait.... shandia fell 800 years ago when the world gov was formed and robin just found a poneglyph that says they went to wat with the #enemy... so the shandians were enemies to the world gov i am sure of it... like the d clan and probably the ryugu kingdom and wano too #this shit is so interesting like there must be a reason roger came there last and with oden to read the poneglyphs AND LEAVE A MESSAGE #having robin and zoro fighting enel right now is so good man.... zoro learning to trust her since he has issues with her since the start...#i dont think there has been a villain that has been more scary than enel... they were terrified about his powers... apart from sabaody #never getting over nami being the one to witness the horrors this arc and then volunteering to go woth enel.. paralel to her with arlong to #where did conis get a bazooka 😭😭 i mean slay wait why does she want to off herself by proxy of enel... they hated jesus too conis its okay #ace wearing red in the cover story.... idk where im going with this it is his color... not taking luffys yellow with him for the search?#SANJI HOLDING USOPPS HAND SLEEPING IS ALSO ANIME ONLY??? AJDJAJAK NOOOOOO they keep putting in the homoeroticism #usopp and nami fighting enel is so funny this is something else.... hag reunion 🫂 hag struggle 🫂 and sanji stepping in at the end... 👌🏻#the girl they are about to sacrifice looks like laki and she is karugaras daughter and then wyper is his descendant.... i see #oh here starts the love story central to the story.... truly i forgot karugara had a wife and a child... i see why #WHAT DOES HE MEAN BY FOUR CORNERS OF THE WORLD?? KARUGARA EXPLAIN #christ.... just the pages of textless panels about karugara and noland having fun together.... its enough to make a grown (wo)man cry #noland just laying on his side on a rock thinking about karugara you cant make this shit up #“the bell will always sound for you” while crying and sobbing.... are you kidding me... and then they can't come back 😭😭😭😭#reading one piece

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damnprecious · 7 months ago

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My side job boss is going to add me to a work group chat with people from my old job. I'm going to be giving instructions to the people from my old job. Why is this my life fjfjfkd

#noopa rambles #idk if my old smaller boss works at the company anymore #pretty sure my old big boss is still there #but I've heard rumours that the small boss might have left which is a shame bc I liked her #the big boss is okay but not the best problem solver #throwback to all those summers when I asked a question bc I didn't Know and didn't get an answer #she just stared at me until I workshopped a solution on my own afgh #I wouldn't be surprised if I have to spell out shit this time too..#my current bosses seem to always complain abt the people in my old company #which makes me go 😤😤 bc those are my (old) people too #idk how the situation is handled there these days but when I was in charge (for the summers) it was Fine #then again I did a lot of it and like to think that I was competent so fjdjdjd #bc I really did carry them a lot...#can't wait for the clown summer to begin afgh #I mean the old boss and company knows I work for my current company bc I already had my sidejob then #but my god it sure is gonna be Something djfjfkf #no but actually I think jumpscaring the old boss is gonna be funny #I doubt she has deleted my number so she's most likely going to recognize the contact djdjd #except I no longer work for her lmaoooo

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nexus-nebulae · 9 months ago

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damn i actually had a pretty good streak there of not having bad insomnia days. that's pretty impressive for me like i haven't really had one since early January

#usually i get them like. maybe once a week #i think it's partially my new meds?#got some meds for anxiety and oh my GOD i finally have something that WORKS instead of fucking lexapro AGAIN #literally all my doctors would go LEXAPRO!! even though it's never fuckin worked for me #BUT I'm on remeron now and it's WORKING #and i made sure to make my Scheduled Pill Time as something i could almost never miss (my mom getting home from work)#bc it's around the same time every day within a half hour range and since i have an outside reminder it helps me actually form a habit #i cannot form habits without outside help it's just. nearly impossible for me #and the meds do make me kind of tired but not enough that I'm fucking constantly sleeping like when i was on seroquel #i can actually fucking THINK through this tired it doesn't just completely take me out 100% of the time #I'm just Slightly Sleepy instead of a zombie #and it helps remind me that I'm tired bc usually i don't notice any physical feelings #(is there a word for that??????? i tried googling but it constantly gave me alexythemia which is not feeling EMOTION)#(when this is like. i can't feel tired or hungry or pain sometimes. or at least i lose the ability to be aware that I'm feeling it)#but anyway the new meds make me just tired enough to remember i need sleep #and i mean. i am sleeping slightly early but 8:30 isn't that bad i don't think #at least i have time to. you know. do stuff between the hours of 5-8 (the only hours my mom is home + stores is open)#and tbh staying up alone all night isn't. the best. for my mental health #i don't handle being alone well. and Pulse is being a dick about system barriers :P (/lh we know why it's needed rn)#we have. a deep deep fear of isolation. like not just being alone but Not Being Able To Call For Help At All #at least with phone/computer we have One outlet for help with emergency services so that helps slightly #we worry a lot about. what would happen. if we had a medical emergency. and nobody knew bc i couldn't contact anyone #mostly. the fear of Something Bad happening and not being found until hours or days later #i like being awake during the day tho bc theres Way More Options for help #and like the fear of Not Being Found doesn't go away like. ever #but at least when people are awake and around its lessened a lot #the fear increases exponentially with each possible second added to the wait time #so knowing that it's just One hour until mom is home and can check on me is a lot better than Nobody's Awake For 5 More Hours #(and my mom is deaf too so i can't just like. scream for help to wake her up)#(not that i can physically scream at all anyway my voice just cannot handle that anymore)

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