#but hes so scary. just trust me bro

[bloodtwin]

i say in my rules that i won't water puck down to make him seem weaker during RPs ....................... & then i proceed to water him down to make him seem weaker during RPs LOL.

i know it's not very fun to write with the guy who always wins bc he's good at everything (ok not everything just most things) & incredibly strong so i always feel bad abt it. i want ppl to have fun interacting with him! but like, The Point of his character is that he's stupidly powerful. i gave him a ridiculously high STR stat for a reason. literally the only thing stopping him from killing every person in the world is his big beautiful heart. and also iago. listen. i have themes & motifs for him. please can anyone hear me. listennnnnnnn

[sateurn]

😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫

These sobs really limited my tags?????

I have so many more thoughts this is so so much less than 1/2. Broski. Big dislike

[kristiliqua]

[read this after reading the tags because fuck i hit the tag limit LMFAOO]

— and jason (n the bunch) definitely makes fun of him for it because holy shit you absolute tryhard (he copes and seethes every time tim manages to snipe his slow ass dynamo — which is basically every fucking time tim is there . he has to rush tim like a fucking madman in order to actually splat him , and then usually dies right after bc he rushed into their base , tunnelvisioning tim and tim only , as a fucking Dynamo . tldr he calls him a tryhard to cope)

(and do Not get me wrong ; its not as if jason’s a thoughtless or bad player [i hate ppl calling him a brute . like istg he’s smart too] . its just that dynamo vs charger is a horrible matchup for him , as the dynamo . he Does manage to get tim without rushing him sometimes , but he needs coordination with his team distracting tim or smth in order to get the advantage he needs , since theyre both equally skilled pretty much . but a 1v1 is just Hard in this matchup [said by a dynamo And charger main . trust me on this one LMAO] , and he usually just gets sniped in those situations — its either a trade or death for him most of the time . thats not a jason thing ; its a charger vs dynamo thing lol)

golly i’ve been talking abt this too long (esp abt tim and jason when tim is nowhere to be found in the og post LMFAO Uhm .! i just like them . jason n tim are my boys) . in fact im going to yap more bc i feel i havent given dami enough appreciation

jason would totally love rolling damian over while dami’s sharking him . he’d laugh in his face and clip it on his switch , before saving the clip on his phone or smth just in case damian attempts to delete it

see it as a punishment for trying to shark a dynamo as a splatana/octobrush instead of just ,,, outmaneuvering the dynamo . bc both splatana and octobrush have good enough range to easily take down a dynamo (he outmaneuvers a lot too ofc ; he just tests his luck sometimes by sharking around jason , wanting to surprise him lol)

they are a Unit on the same team tho . damian as the faster splatana/octobrush supporting jason’s slower dynamo/stamper (he’d play that too . def didnt start playing it bc it pairs rlly well with [damian’s] splatana ,, no siree ,,,) as they both kill the enemy team with terrifying efficiency . (i’d say they’d be extra good with tim making callouts in comms — bc ofc im still thinking abt tim too istg 😭 — but i also feel like neither of them would listen to him half of the time . and take joy in his misery whenever they lose , ignoring their own misery from losing in favor of making fun of tim and blaming each other for losing [like “if you hadnt died when they started pushing we could have defended successfully , todd !” / “oh MY BAD that i TRADED with their stupid quick-respawning motherfucker and couldnt paint under my feet to get away from their bomb because im a fucking DYNAMO —” (can you tell i definitely main dynamo and have experienced similar situations . WHY is it so FUCKING BAD at PAINTING UNDER YOUR FEET . MY GOD .)])

anyway holy shit thats it im done Fucking Hell . here’s your essay op ! i love the art . it has clearly stirred my love for batfam and splatoon (im sorry LMFAOAO)

is this too niche

[kavehayati]

Omg I recall what my dad said to me approximately one year ago exactly and it literally was so morally wrong the rest of that day I spent like completely derealised and disconnected from reality trying not to panic

[kitten4sannie]

sleepover

pairing: perverted bsf! wooyoung x fem! reader feat. a comatose mingi (he’s asleep on the bed lmao…or is he…)

summary: wooyoung is more than willing to hold you when you’re afraid during your horror movie marathon, and even more willing to help distract you like a good friend does.

wc: 1.4k

warnings: perverted dom! wooyoung, subby innocent! reader, bro is convincing and manipulative okay, cnc/dubcon-ish vibes (if that’s not your thing feel free to skip!!), coercion/corruption, exhibitionism (all of the following is done right next to mingi), brief kissing, groping, fingering, initial orgasm denial,, tit play + spit, rough unprotected sex, creampie, this is a wild one idkidkkkkk

a/n: wooyo has been haunting my brain lately so i had no choice but to write this >~< i hope you enjoy <33 alsoo i’ll be posting one more corruption themed fic very soon that feats frat boy san and minyunhwa~

song rec: if you think i’m pretty - artemas

“I told you not to put this movie on, Woo. It’s way too scary,” you complained whinily into your best friend’s shoulder, shielding your eyes from the suspenseful scene playing out on the laptop sitting on the edge of your bed.

“Mingi was the one who wanted to watch it, you know,” Wooyoung chided, causally wrapping his arm around your shoulders, rubbing your bare arm up and down in a comforting manner.

“Well, Mingi’s passed out.” Pouting, you pointed to your other friend that was curled up underneath the comforter beside you, his eyes shut. “He’s not even watching, so what’s the point?”

Wooyoung rolled his eyes. “Come on, Y/N. Don’t be a pussy.” His cold fingers made their way down to your waist to squeeze at it, making you jump from the sudden contact. “Oh, I see….Do you think the monster’s gonna get ya?”

“Shut up, Wooyoung!” you whisper-shouted, as to not wake up Mingi. You pushed on his chest, feeling his heart beat quickly against your hand. Was it racing like yours was? And, when did he get so close to you? His hand was already running up and down the bare skin of your thigh, causing your thin shorts to ride up more and more, but you didn’t have the nerve to confront him about it. Your pout grew. “I’m really scared, okay?”

“Oh, you poor baby,” Wooyoung cooed softly into your ear, his words laced with faux pity, his sharpened gaze focused solely on your blushing face. “Do you want me to help you, Y/N? Distract you from the scary movie?”

“Y-yes, please…”

You didn’t know what you were getting into, but you trusted that Wooyoung had your best interest in mind. It was then that he gently coaxed you further into his arms, lying comfortably against him as you faced the laptop screen once again. Goosebumps began to spread across your limbs from underneath the warm comforter, but it wasn’t from the frightening movie — it was from Wooyoung’s hand slipping underneath your shorts, his slender fingers rubbing at your pulsing cunt through your panties.

“W-Wooyoung…” you croaked weakly, your face and body growing so hot, you could pass out. Friends didn’t do this sort of thing, did they?

“Shhhh, baby, just look at the screen…yeah, just like that…” he sighed softly, his warm breath fanning over your neck, now concentrating on the way your tank top clung to your softness of your tits, how your nipples grew hard enough to poke through the thin material, groaning when he found your clit through your panties, rubbing at it in slow, small circles.

“B-but we’re friends, Woo…” You made a sad attempt at pushing his hand away, the moral debate you were having internally slowly fizzling away the longer Wooyoung touched you.

“Isn’t this what friends are for?” Wooyoung persisted, pulling your panties to the side just in time for his fingers to dip in between your soaked folds. “And, fuck, you’re so wet right now, Y/N. It feels good, doesn’t it? What’s so wrong with that, baby?”

“But, nnngh…Mingi’s right next to us…” You began to melt into Wooyoung’s arms and the soft mattress below you, unable to resist spreading your legs out for him, your thigh even resting against Mingi’s, not noticing when it shifted just as two of Wooyoung’s digits slipped inside you.

Licking at his lips, Wooyoung then pressed them onto your cheek, egging you on in a low voice, “Then, tell me to stop, baby.” He began to fuck his fingers into you at a fast pace, your walls clenching around them. “Right now. Say it.” Now, he was relentlessly rubbing his thumb into your clit with his free hand, still working your cunt, hooking his digits against the spot that made you spasm, your body growing warmer and heavier. When you pouted up at him and whined, he simply mirrored your helpless expression. “What’s the matter, baby? Hm?”

“Oh– fuck, right there…” you moaned out, not even attempting to look at the laptop screen in front of you, instead solely focused on your best friend beside you, so desperate to cum, you began to roll your hips down every time his fingers plunged into you.

“Yeah? You’re feeling really good now, aren’t you, Y/N? Now that you’re nice and full? Just look at you, baby…You can’t help but fuck yourself dumb on my fingers, huh?” Wooyoung looked like the monster from the movie now, eyes full of hunger, like he was ready to eat you up.

“Uh-huh, uh-huhhh…” Just as your sounds of pleasure began to crescendo, your mind growing cloudier by the second, pulling at the sheets below you because you were right there, Wooyoung ceased his movement completely, leaving you high and dry. “No, please, don’t stop, please…!”

Wooyoung gave you a look of indifference, much like a cat that suddenly wasn’t interested in playtime anymore. “Show me your tits. Maybe then I’ll make you cum.”

Desperate for your best friend’s attention and touch, you slowly rolled your tank top up until your tits spilled out, tears pricking at your eyes. How did you get here? Why did Wooyoung’s deliciously dark gaze successfully distract you from the paralyzing shame you felt? Or is that what made you wet? The way you were slutting yourself out for your best friend while the other was sleeping right next to you? “Please make me cum, Y-Youngie…”

“Fuck, you’re so cute, come here.” Now, Wooyoung was on top of you, leaving as much of his saliva on your tits as possible, squeezing one when he was noisily sucking on the other, his dilated eyes never leaving your teary ones. “Can I fuck you, Y/N? I’ll make you cum, I promise…I need to be inside you, baby, please, you’re so fucking hot…” Desperate for release, Wooyoung lowered his sweatpants until his heavy cock dropped onto your bare cunt, rubbing himself along it, making your mind grow that much more empty. “Just the tip, okay? That’s okay, yeah?”

Before you knew it, you were nodding, and just like that, he was inside you, your best friend, using you like a cocksleeve. Wooyoung was ramming his cock into your cunt like he was trying to knock you up. “That’s a good slut, fuckkk, taking me so well…” You tried to moan, to speak, to say anything, but you couldn’t, not with the way his tongue suddenly went down your throat.

All you could do was cling onto Wooyoung, your nails digging into his skin when it felt like the tip of his cock was pounding into your cervix, almost growing dizzy. When you heard your best friend groaning about how he was getting ready to fuck you full of his cum, you gasped, unable to talk, short, broken moans being punched out of you each time Wooyoung slammed himself into you, your thighs hooking around his waist once his hot load began to pour into you. It was then that you turned your head just in time to realize Mingi was watching you intently, his plush lips parted just enough to let drool slip past, catching onto the way that something was moving rapidly underneath the comforter somewhere near his abdomen.

“Told you she would put out, didn’t I, Min?” Wooyoung mused smugly, fucking you through the orgasm that tore through your used body, using your bruised hips like handlebars as he did so.

“You were so right, Woo, so, so right,” Mingi sighed out, tossing his head back into the pillow behind him, leaving a few watery cumshots on the inside of your comforter and his hand.

You didn’t know if you wanted to cry or to cum again, instead just trying to catch your breath, hiding your face underneath one of your wrists, at least until Wooyoung pulled it down and made you look at the both of them.

“You’ll let Mingi have a turn, won’t you, Y/N? It’s only fair, right?”

Mingi nodded in agreement, before leaning in, licking across his teeth. “Having my cock inside your little used cunt next will make another good ‘distraction’, don’t you think?”

Even though the credits were rolling on the laptop behind them, the monsters hadn’t left. They were right there in front of you, waiting for your permission to ravage you. You couldn’t help but nod. They were your best friends, after all.

Apply for the taglist here ⇢ ♡

general taglist: @dazzlinglight @thefinerthingz3 @cosmiczen @choerryge @arusio @ethicalz @jinsonaz @kitty4hwa @purplechannie @jazzymoore @kodzukein @asjkdk @chanst1ddies @createyour0wnworld @roarmingi @simeonswhore @k0rean-big-mini0n @bls-luv-me @igotlockedout @fl0r4f4wn @miriamxsworld @woosmaid @kawaiikels @azcon @allofuswantgwinam @breezy-simp @eastleighsblog @singularity777 @san-realblkwife @kawennote09 @feuille-et-pain @slut4hwa @owjohny @hijeongguk @lilramennoodle @leo-seonghwa @staytinydegenerate @greenymar @baguette-atiny @lvnderhazes @knucklesdeepmingi @soobiverse @jeongwangjessmina @ja3hwa @actuallyalien @aggiebackstage @doom-fics @koalakoala8 @felixs-voice-makes-me-wanna

© kitten4sannie, 2024.

[iloveyoubecauseyouarelove]

Hearing my ma go off about betrayed trust like 💀

It's not that deep not everything some does or doesnt do that you Dont like is Not a dig at you

Like my sibling didnt mention they gave 20 dollars to a friend for a game. I dont think it's unreasonable for my ma to have want to know but also it's not unreasonable for my sibling to have just not said. My sibling has hundreds of dollars, im sure 20 seems inconsequential. Should they have lied and said 5 dollars when asked? No, especially not with how hypocritical my ma is about even the "smallest of lies". But should my ma have feelings of betrayal at not being told to begin with? Also no, my ma just likes to think every behavior she doesnt like is an intentional personal attack

Like 1 time i was punished and had to leave my smartphone at home and take a backup phone to school. Keyword: school. I have no reason to be on the phone that has no apps no web right? And my ma doesnt always text me during school. She also told me i dont need to keep the phone On. So i left it off the whole day except for when i check my phone at lunch, around the time she texts me yeah? I dont get any texts so i turn the phone back off until after school. Turns out my ma texted me a Little bit after i turned off the phone. But she starts berating me about not texting her as a way to get back at her for punishing me and taking away my phone. I was just so ??? Damn confused. I explained to her that i turned my phone on at lunch and then turned back off after and she didnt care? And then she was like why did you have the phone off anyways? I told her she said to leave it off. She said she meant the ringer and i didnt know how to do that but also she said i could turn the phone off. She didnt care, she thought she disproved me and i was just trying to make excuses for trying to get back at her. I Might have told her i was going to answer during class and i dont have time during passing cause my classes were so far. She still didnt care. She put it in her mind i was trying to punish her for punishing me and so that's it. I wouldnt be able to change her mind

[riminiscensce]

Poor Ajaw bro😭

He will definitely go to you to snitch on Kinich, and while at it, he’ll throw in some make-believe stories that makes Kinich sound like a horrible person.

“Kinich said he’ll feed me to the saurian mountain king!”

“Kinich was going to throw me at the desert!”

“Kinich wanted to sell me to criminals!”

The only thing that makes his claim believable to you is how he was cutely trying to wipe his tears with his tiny, pixelated hands.

And one more thing to make you believe him even more:

“I-I just wanted to hang out with him, I had no one to play with and I thought that m-maybe we could’ve spent some time together as friends…”

That was an obvious lie, he would never say that.

But it works well enough to persuade you to talk some senses into Kinich.

The saurian hunter doesn’t even know what happened when you came barging into his place telling him to apologize to Ajaw, and you weren’t at all pleased to see him.

Then Kinich finds out Ajaw lied about him.

“I didn’t do anything he said—“

“Are you saying Ajaw is a liar?”

“Yes,”

“Hey!” Ajaw growled, but quickly clearing his throat to get back into his act. “I mean—It really happened!”

Then Ajaw decided to pull off one of his secret moves to persuade you:

“D-Don’t you trust me?” The dragon frowns, dots of tears still in the corner of his eyes while clutching onto your clothes like a little kid. “I-It was so scary…! I keep getting nightmares about it and—“

Then he continues to sob on your shoulder, saying how he can’t even bring himself to tell the full story at how terrified he is.

He felt an immense wave of success when you start to comfort him.

When you weren’t looking, Ajaw would sneak a glance at Kinich, quietly laughing at how helpless he has gotten.

And Kinich felt intensely mocked by it.

But before he could do anything else, you left with Ajaw, telling him that he’ll stay with you until Kinich can bring himself to apologize.

As the hunter continues to watch you baby Ajaw from afar, the dragon would always grab any chances he gets to rub it in Kinich’s face.

It was sweet revenge.

[astonmartinii]

reluctant cupid | lando norris social media au

pairing: lando norris x fem bff!reader

you could set your bestie up with a driver or you could confess your feelings? lando norris is dumb.

based on this request: Could you write something about being best friends with lando and he tries to help set you up with another driver you have a crush on, but then he realises he actually likes you so he has to sabotage all the wingmanning he’s done and you end up together Idk if that makes sense 😭🫶🏼🫶🏼 -@mbappesleftthigh

MASTERLIST | TIP JAR

yourusername

liked by landonorris, oscarpiastri and 49,340 others

yourusername: someone please save me from the grips of hinge and this oh so lonesome life

view all comments

user1: girl knows the whole f1 paddock and looks like that and is still alone there is NO HOPE for me

user2: this post might have thrown me over the edge

landonorris: "i'm so lonely" "why don't you approach that guy" "no too scary"

user3: that's so real though

yourusername: thank you!

landonorris: how do you expect to find a boyfriend when you don't like to talk to anyone and treat hinge like a gameshow

yourusername: i didn't come here for actual advice let me commiserate in peace. god, can women have anything these days?

landonorris: ???

yourusername: oh! idea! pretty please set me up with one of your friends? they have to be great otherwise you wouldn't be friends with them, right? RIGHT?

landonorris: i guess...

yourusername: please lando, i've never asked for anything before

landonorris: i can feel you pouting through the phone

yourusername: so you'll consider ?

landonorris: fine...

user4: bro either gotta admit his feelings now or be condemned to be in the plot of a weird romantic comedy

user5: i personally don't think i can wait until the third act break up with this side character LANDO ACT NOW

oscarpiastri: you'd really trust lando's judgement?

yourusername: he's friends with me, he's got good taste?

oscarpiastri: touche

maxverstappen1: whatever you really wanna say oscar, you gotta keep it in, these idiots will figure it out eventually

yourusername: ???

landonorris: ???

user6: the grid are so done with their asses i can't 😭

user7: but what if the universe doesn't intervene and lando really has just lost the girl forever?

user8: bestie we can't be thinking like this

landonorris

liked by carlossainz55, yourusername and 812,047 others

tagged: yourusername

landonorris: being back home means being bothered by her (and whatever is her newest hyperfixation - it's sylvanian families this month if you couldn't tell)

view all comments

user9: i am so sorry but they are so in love

user10: it's cute in the movies, but these blind bitches are starting to piss me off

yourusername: THEY CAN HEAR YOU, BE A BETTER DAD

landonorris: they're not my children

yourusername: you take that back right now, you LOVE them

landonorris: you spent my money on them yes

yourusername: that's fatherhood, buddy. buckle up

user11: whoever he sets her up (if he's still dumb enough to do that) is gonna be the biggest third wheel in history

user12: who would willingly sign up for that

user13: me. i would. i have two working eyes and have seen y/n

maxverstappen1: who are these funky little critters and how can i procure some for p?

yourusername: finally a man with sense, literally any grocery store or toy store

maxverstappen1: perf

yourusername: if lando stops being mr. grumpy i'll ask him if i can come to a race and p and i can play animal families

landonorris: i am NOT mr. grumpy

maxverstappen1: you kinda are dude. is it the set-up is it stressing you out?

landonorris: nO

yourusername: then why are you putting it off !!! lando i might die from terminal yearning !!!

landonorris: i have an interested candidate

yourusername: really? do you think they'll actually like me? like this isn't a pity date right?

landonorris: nope!

user14: lando is typing through tears as we speak

user15: if y/n does go on a date with someone from the paddock i actually hope it goes well, as one lonely girl to another, it's tough out here we need one win

f1wagupdates

liked by user18, user19 and 11,043 others

tagged: yourusername & carlossainz55

f1wagupdates: turns out lando is a bit of a cupid as his childhood friend y/n y/ln was spotted out and about with carlos sainz.

view all comments

user20: HE ACTUALLY DID IT

user21: that moment when you're so down bad for a girl that you set her up with your best friend

user22: that moment when you're such a wimp you can't admit your feelings and set up the girl you like with a literal GREEK GOD

user23: i am so bamboozled by this move he literally looked like a kicked puppy on his stream bro this is your doing 😭

user24: she's a lover girl she's going to get her heart broken :(

user25: this has mess written all over it

user26: she's literally described herself as a terminal yearner i feel like she'll throw herself in and will get hurt

user27: UNLESS! this is all part of the plan? what if lando set her up with a messy guy like carlos so he can be the shoulder to cry on and that's how he slides in?

user28: that's very convoluted, very rom-com but i'll take it if it means we get lando and y/n together in the end

user29: i know this probably won't last long but can we all appreciate how hot this couple is?

user30: lando and y/n runs rings round y/n and carlos

user31: lol lando is a bad friend for setting her up with CARLOS him and charles are THEE red flags

user32: i hope y/n is prepared

user33: also lando hasn't thought it fully out if his plan is to be the shoulder to cry on because he's just opening her up to be called a homie hopper or a paddock bunny

carlossainz55

liked by charles_leclerc, pierregasly and 702,554 others

carlossainz55: productive weekend with my girl

view all comments

user34: well that's not y/n

user35: that finished faster than i expected

user36: lando DO NOT quit your day job

landonorris: call me bro

carlossainz55: si, cabron

user37: i don't think they'll be cabrons after this call

user38: maybe this is all just going to plan?

user39: yall gotta give up this conspiracy theory maybe these people are just as dumb and mean as they seem to be

user40: soooooo... what did we all do this weeekend?

user41: i broke a girl's heart @carlossainz55 twins 👯‍♂️

user42: AHHHH???

maxverstappen1: oh that's not-

yourusername: you're so chronically online :(

maxverstappen1: you're alive?

yourusername: yes. coming at you live from the bed i'm currently rotting in

maxverstappen1: not going to say i didn't warn you?

carlossainz55: really? in my own comment section?

yourusername: one second, we're having a conversation here

maxverstappen1: yeah carlos, gosh.

carlossainz55: i'm so confused

user43: okay power move to just start a conversation in his comments?

user44: the power of confusion is simply unmatched

yourusername

liked by maxverstappen1, landonorris and 56,309 others

yourusername: certified boy hater

view all comments

user45: a ferrari boy will do that to you

landonorris: feeling hashtag victimised rn

yourusername: obviously doesn't include you girlypop. but you seriously need to reevaluate your judgement

landonorris: carlos is attractive?

yourusername: he ghosted me?

carlossainz55: i am right here

yourusername: blocked.

landonorris: did you actually just block him?

yourusername: yes 😀 !

landonorris: god this is a nightmare

yourusername: not if you'd take a GOD DAMN HINT

landonorris: WHAT IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?

user46: yall this is a public instagram comment section

user47: don't say that, this is their argument in the rain moment

user48: lemme grab the popcorn 🍿

maxverstappen1: this better not include the real number one girlypop here

yourusername: of course not pookie

oscarpiastri: you gonna continue the lil spat above this?

yourusername: no?

oscarpiastri: well some people (max and i) would like to listen so please continue

yourusername: no, i don't think i will

oscarpiastri: GOD YOU PEOPLE ARE INSUFFERABLE

maxverstappen1: what oscar said

user49: oscar and max are so real

user50: they can't leave us on this cliff hanger

landonorris

liked by yourusername, danielricciardo and 1,043,788 others

landonorris: some snaps from '23

view all comments

user51: have we just been thirst trapped?

user52: i don't think it was intended for us

user53: this has "i am hotter than carlos sainz" written all over it

yourusername: posting tits on main, brave.

landonorris: i came second in singapore.

yourusername: sureeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. modesty, ever heard of it lan?

landonorris: slutshaming isn't cute y/n

yourusername: you kinda have to pull to be a slut lan. you are under qualified for the position

landonorris: if you keep being mean to me i will call your mum or my mum.

yourusername: try it. i see cisca more than you, i have faith in her

landonorris: the line is busy. are you on the phone to MY mum right now?

yourusername: maybe.

user54: we're so close to them getting their heads out of their asses

user55: don't get my hopes up

danielricciardo: i hope this works lol

landonorris: you don't think i'm sexy?

danielricciardo: it doesn't matter what i think

landonorris: i'm not sexy :(

danielricciardo: you're baiting me but yes, you are sexy.

user56: i'll fight anyone who made this man believe he's not beautiful

liked by yourusername

user57: I SAW THAT 📸

user58: someone just lock them in a cupboard at this point

oscarpiastri: noted.

yourusername

liked by maxverstappen1, landonorris and 89,034 others

tagged: landonorris

yourusername: yeah, yeah. you can stop yelling at us now.

view all comments

user61: LET'S FUCKING GO

user62: it was worth all that yelling. i expect an invite to the wedding now.

user63: wedding? girly they only just realised their feelings after a DECADE

maxverstappen1: it was about fucking time

yourusername: okay miss ma'am. some people are EMOTIONALLY VULNERABLE AND NOT VERY GOOD AT PROCESSING THEM

maxverstappen1: you must've been emotionally constipated because this was painful

yourusername: it was painful for me too

maxverstappen1: so painful that you dated CARLOS

yourusername: one date! ONE!

maxverstappen1: carlos said can you unblock him so he can be mean to me?

yourusername: fine.

carlossainz55: STOP MAKING ME LOOK LIKE A BAD PERSON. YES I AM NOT THE BEST AT RELATIONSHIPS BUT LEAVE ME BE

maxverstappen1: lol

yourusername: lol

user64: unblocking carlos to hit him with the lol max and y/n might be more iconic than lando and y/n

landonorris: not on our relationship announcement post 🤨

user65: OOP.

landonorris: i love you doofus

yourusername: i love you too muppet

landonorris: how much was the betting pool for your family?

yourusername: it got to over £300

landonorris: ours was £750

yourusername: are we dumb?

landonorris: no!

oscarpiastri: two dumbass girls saying 'yass' to each other

yourusername: LEAVE US BE

landonorris: oscar :(

user66: not their own families betting on when they'd get together 😭

landonorris

liked by maxverstappen1, yourusername and 1,430,778 others

tagged: yourusername

landonorris: first win, hopefully not my only one.

view all comments

user67: MY BABIES

user68: i feel like i've been on this journey with them

oscarpiastri: thank god you guys got your shit together, i was THIS close to jumping out the nearest window if i had to watch lando mope around like a kicked puppy when y/n had the lil thing with carlos

user69: so it wasn't some grand plan?

oscarpiastri: no he's just dumb enough to actually set up his first love with his best friend

landonorris: OSCAR!

oscarpiastri: am i wrong?

landonorris: no... but! i got there in the end

oscarpiastri: good thing you're faster on track

user70: the grid being just as done with them as us is killing me

maxfewtrell: finally this unnecessarily long and overly convoluted saga has come to and end, lets never do this again!

landonorris: i'm locked in for life bro no worries

yourusername: awwwwwwwwwwwwww i love you too bubs

maxfewtrell: stop being sappy under my comment

yourusername: you just complained we didn't sort out our shit fast enough and now we're too sappy?

landonorris: STICK TO A STORY BOZO

maxfewtrell: now you're even more ride or die... can we go back?

yourusername: nope!

landonorris: nope!

maxverstappen1: i for one am very happy for you both

yourusername: thank you max !!

landonorris: not so fast, he had the biggest bet on us in the paddock

yourusername: get that bag sis

landonorris: ???

yourusername: we can't fight it anymore, let them have their jokes, we actually have each other now :)

landonorris: yes we do :) xx

user71: golly gosh this is so fucking cute

fin.

note: i hope this is what you were looking for and that you all enjoyed!! i'm just waiting on my tester sticker sheets for my small business @badlydrawnf1cats on here and on instagram, if you wanna give it a follow x tHANK YOU FOR READING MY LOVES X

[tulpanya]

five more minutes, please!

includes : (mouthwashing) anya, curly, daisuke, swansea.

summary : you fall asleep on them, will they have the heart to wake you?

warnings : gn! reader. curly carries reader around (trust, this man is a gym bro, no matter what he will be carrying your ass).

ANYA

You were helping Anya study for one of her upcoming exams, flashcards in hand and your head in her lap. "Correct~" You coo, eyelids growing heavy as you flip through the cards- each of which answered correctly by Anya. It isn't until she misses one that you find a small break for yourself. Eyes falling shut, Anya writes down notes furiously, clacking away at her laptop.

It's a nice moment, the ambience has your breathing slowly evening out until you've fallen asleep on her lap. "Okay, I won't miss that one next time," She mumbles, "What's the next-" She tenses up upon seeing your sleeping form. When did you fall asleep? She glances at the time on her computer and her eyes nearly bug out of her head- when did it get so late?!

Closing her laptop, Anya hesitantly begins to trace the curves of your face, a small smile forming on her lips. It wasn't rare to see you asleep before her, but it was still a moment she cherished. She wondered how long it would take for her legs to start to tingle from falling asleep, and she wonders if when that times come, will she be able to wake you?

Well, when you wake up, you're still on her lap at the dining table. Anya's head tilted back as she lets out soft snores, causing you to bite back some laughter. Of course she couldn't wake you, that would be like committing a grave sin!

CURLY

"I'm tired," You grumble, Curly in response just nods his head, muttering quiet 'i know, i know's as he tries not to speed home. "Will you carry me inside?" He glances over at you- and when he sees you're serious he chuckles.

"Yeah," He grins as he pulls into the driveway, "Just close your eyes, I'll get you." With a giddy grin, you close your eyes and await your knight in shining armor. He's quiet as he opens the car door, and even quieter as he picks you up and carries you inside your shared home. He goes so far as to carry you to the bed- but as he's about to put you down, he's notice you've already began to drool on his shoulder.

"Didn't realize I was so comfy," He teases, even though you can't hear. "Well, should I hold on to you a little longer?" Only your even breathing is heard. Indulging himself, he carries you for a little while longer wondering how you haven't woken up yet.

It's then, as you nuzzle into shoulder with a sweet smile, that Curly realizes he would never let you down again if he could help it. (After an hour his arms start to go a little numb so he finally puts you down bc he doesn't want to accidentally drop you)

DAISUKE

"Movie night!" Daisuke cheered, nearly spilling popcorn everywhere as he jumped over the couch to sit next to you, smiling from ear to ear. "Are you ready to be scared~" He wiggled his brows, selecting the movie you two were going to watch- a horror movie that just came out.

"Speak for yourself," You scoff, getting cozy under the blankets as Daisuke presses play on the movie. It's not even forty minutes into the movie before you start to yawn, your eyelids feeling heavy. The only time you really jump is when Daisuke yelps from some scary scene on the screen.

"This movie is pretty intense, isn't i-" Before he can finish his sentence, your head is hitting his shoulder. His eyes widen, thinking you're trying to scare him, but when he realizes you fell asleep he relaxes a bit. "Jeez, you're no fun..." He mumbles, shaking his head at you- how could fall asleep during movie night!? But... You did look rather cute... Nervously he glances away from your face.

Why did you have to look so damn cute? Daisuke glances back at your face, no longer paying attention to the movie. Your soft little snores makes his heart do more flips that the scary scenes on screen. "Hey... You really asleep?" He asks, waiting for a reply. When you don't respond (because you're asleep), he lets out a shaky breath. "I... I like you... Just so you know..." He whispers his confession to you, and when you don't react (because, again, you're sleeping), he turns back to the movie.

"Anyway, this is a dumb movie- you can pick the movie next time." He talks aloud, deciding to turn off the movie and (try to) fall asleep as well, unable to wake you up or move you off him.

SWANSEA

"I told you it was a dumb idea to take the train," Swansea grumbles as he boards the last train, which is late, with you. You roll your eyes as you listen to him continue to mumble out complaints. Finding a seat in an emptier section, Swansea finally stops yapping.

"Got that out of your system?" You ask, and it's his turn to roll his eyes. You snicker, resting your head against his shoulder. "At least admit you had fun today, won't you?" He sighs, glancing down at you.

"Yeah, I had fun." He says, albeit begrudgingly. With that, silence washes over you both. It's not long before the exhaustion of the fun day starts to hit you, and you think it'll be fine if you just close your eyes for a little bit- until you're skipping through dreamland. Swansea notices almost immediately that you've fallen asleep, and frowns.

"Seriously?" He tries to shake you awake, but you don't budge. Sighing, he awkwardly adjusts himself so that you're more comfortable. "Just don't blame me if ya wake up with a crick in the neck, 'kay?" He lets you sleep until it's your stop- he loves you, but not enough to let you sleep 'til the end of the line.

Thank you for reading! I hope you enjoyed!

[lateatnewyork]

LIKE MOTHER LIKE DAUGHTER! 001

pairing: oscar piastri x pop princess!reader

summary: yn is taylor and travis' "child" and oscar's had a crush on her since her disney days or everyone thinks oscar's crush is one sided or yn releases an album more adult rated than her previous ones

extra information: yn isnt directly taylors child its like a mother daughter relationship, shes friends with all big stars like sza, taylor, olivia rodrigo, conan gray, laufey, madison beer and etc

fc: sabrina carpenter

a/n GUYS PROMISE ME YOU WONT MAKE FUN OF THE LYRICS I COME UP WITH IM NOT A SONG WRITER 😭😭😭

ynln

liked by oscarpiastri, sza and 802,348 others date night w madisonbeer view comments

gracieabrams BBGS ➥ ynln BBG ➥ madisonbeer BBG madisonbeer im better than any man trust 🙏 liked by creator taylorswift pretty girls ➥ ynln literally you sza cuties conangray waiting for the soft launch i was promised ➥ user09 CONAN??? ➥ user45 WHAT SOFT LAUNCH ➥ user24 SPILL oliviarodrigo the last photo🥴 ➥ madisonbeer how u make us feel honeymoon whens the next album ➥ ynln SOONN ynloml oscar in the likes?? ➥ user05 not surprising tbh hes had a crush on her since she was on disney 😭

ynln

liked by oscarpiastri, taylorswift 890,382 others life lately (through his eyes) view comments

ynloml MOTHER IS THAT A MAN 🤮 ➥ ynln im afraid so child averageynlover NOT ANOTHER BADDIE OFF THE MARKET conangray is this the soft launch i was promised?? ➥ conangray ITS ONE PHOTO OUT OF 9 ➥ ynln AND A CAPTION CONAN oliviarodrigo leave himmm ➥ ynln i would but he takes such cute photos alexanderasaintmleux pretty girl ➥ ynln 🪞🪞 lilymhe cutie ➥ ynln says u no1f1lover why are there so many wags in the comments ➥ user09 WHAT IF SHES DATING SOMEONE ON THE GRID ➥ user49 this is the delulu i aspire to be ➥ user56 or maybe just maybe its a bunch of girls supporting another girl landonorris ew ➥ ynln r u talking abt ur face carmenmundt come over for dinner one day ➥ ynln will do 😁 op81 maybe oscar will finally stop going after her

oscarpiastri

liked by ynln, landonorris and 403,692 others life lately view comments

landonorris WOAH georgerussell JUMPSCARE ➥ landonorris IK OSCAR'S SO SCARY ➥ georgerussell yep i definitely meant oscar alexalbon THERES CHILDREN HERE ➥ oscarpiastri is one of them you logansargeant ew oliverbearman stop being horny on main ➥ arthurleclerc fr lilymhe shes so cuteee op81 OSCAR SOFT LAUNCHING WHAT rbrmylove WHY IS THE YN LN IN THE LIKES ➥ user09 idk bro but somethings up user67 what jeans are those user59 WHY ISNT ANYONE TALKING ABOUT THE PICTURES 😭 ➥ user48 BECAUSE OSCAR 'NO RIZZ' PIASTRI SOFT LAUNCHED ➥ oscarpiastri i have rizz 😕

ynln

liked by honeymoon, oscarpiastri and 2,392,481 others surprise!! my sixth studio album comes out on 6th april !! i want to give a special thanks to my friends and my forever muse; i love you baby view comments

user09 OOMF WAS RIGHT??? oliviarodrigo YAYYYY conangray YIPEEE alexanderasaintmleux im so excited lilymhe cant wait landonorris 34+35 = 69 ?? ➥ landonorris OH ➥ user09 LANDO HELP danielricciardo ❤️ ➥ user49 what taylorswift i cant believe it's your sixth album already 💗 traviskelce new favourite album?? gracieabram SKSKSKS sza cutie tyla im so proud of you beyonce 😍 laufey NO WAY carmenmundt !!!! kellypiquet cant wait 🫶 user95 why are there wags in the comment section ➥ user59 mayb cos theyre yn fans ?? ynloml SAY SIKE RN

ynln

liked by oscarpiastri, celinedion and 999,999 others following in taylorswift 's footsteps by being the man ! 💋 view comments

palomasandoval this was so fun! whitneypeak we ate user09 theres no way oscars gf is good with him liking popstar yn's pics ➥ user59 he mightve had a crush on her but hes still a fan taylorswift 🫶 ynloml U SAID U LIKE MY EYES AND U LIKE TO MAKE EM ROLL? conangray mv on repeat ! oliviarodrigo smash 😍 user08 THIS MV>>>> user56 I LOVE THIS ALBUM gracieabrams prettyy alexanderasaintmleux wow 😍 lilymhe private show plss kellypiquet wife me up pls carmenmundt ur actually so fine ynsno1fan MOTHERRR

a/n erm i found this in my drafts and i think i didnt post it cos of my cringe lyrics but oh well here it is guys

[life-is-more-than-just-a-game]

○ Thanos in a relationship ○

A/N: As I said, I became a fucking Simp for Thanos aka. Choi Su-Bong, so le me HAS TO write some sweet Thanos being in a relationship with you Headcanons! UwU

This will only be an exception, after all, this is actually a blog for Alice in Borderland, but … let's see. 😋

Characters: Thanos aka. Choi Su-Bong aka. #230

POV: gn!neutral

Warnings: Contains topics from Squid Game season 2- if you haven't watched yet, this writing can contain slight spoilers!

Bro is a flirty little brat, but boy, when it comes to you, he has everything he needed in life.

For him you are the most beautiful human he has ever met in his entire life- and he met lots of people based on who and what he is.

Unlike other flirting attempts, for example with Kang Mi-na or Se-mi, he was different when he was trying his luck with you.

He didn't make up some rap to impress you.

He didn't even just chat you up from behind or from the side, how he is it doing most of the time with other players.

Instead, he held back a little, but can't deny that he's been watching you very closely for a while.

He made it his mission to impress you, but instead you did it faster with him, leaving him downright speechless.

In other words: he fell fast but hard for you although you haven't done anything special.

But enough of the prehistory, let's get down to the essentials. 😋

Based on the fact that you're more than just a flirt for him, a relationship with Thanos would probably be something really nice.

I see him as someone who would be very protective over you. So, whenever you have to play another game, he will stand by your side, making ever and ever again sure you are with him and not with someone else.

It's okay if he puts his trust in other people, but you don't have to put your trust in anyone else but him, because who knows if they wouldn't want to betray you.

Thanos has been through a lot in his past life. He knows that he has done many things that are unforgivable and that many people condemn him for them. All the more reason for him to appreciate the fact that you are still giving him a chance to prove himself.

He appreciates YOU and your time you take for him.

It's hard to believe, but he is grateful that you exist and grateful for your mere presence.

From the outside, he may always seem like a strong and tough guy who loves to bully and manipulate other people.

The truth is, he just wants to find someone who will stay with him and never let him go.

He may seem scary to some, but deep down he is just as vulnerable as anyone else.

He hates the fact that he shows himself to be so “weak”, especially towards you, and that he makes himself vulnerable to you - and to outsiders.

Thanos just so afraid. Afraid of losing his life, but most afraid of losing something he loves the most once again- he is afraid of losing you. 😭

Please, give him as much hugs as possible.

Hug him before a game starts.

Hug him while you guys are playing when it's possible.

And for gods sake, hug him RIGHT AFTER a game!

This is when he is at his most sensitive and more affectionate than EVER!

In the common room, he would retreat with you to a corner where you two can just be alone for at least five minutes.

Sit between his legs on the floor, so he can hug you as tight as possible from behind, hiding his face in your neck or your shoulder.

Sit next to him, so he can put one arm around your shoulders while he looks for your hand with the other to just hold it silently.

Please, gift him a smile and tell him that everything will be okay and that you feel fine after the game and safe with him in your presence.

And don't let anyone come to you during this time, he will literally frighten them away if he has to. 💀

With the right person by his side, Thanos is a real softy.

He loves you.

More than himself and that's nearly impossible ...

Hold him.

Smile at him.

Talk with him.

Ruin his hair if you feel like it.

And most important:

Please NEVER deny any kisses from him, that would break him when it's the perfect bad time ...

He's just a boy looking for someone who loves him with all his mistakes and flaws like he will love the perfect one with all their good and bad sides ...

[manorpunk]

“I don’t know. Whenever we try to do stuff, me and Zoey, half the time she starts crying and freaking out, and she says it’s not my fault and she says she likes me, but…” Saintjohn Hadouken sighed through pinched lips, hard enough to make his cheeks puff, and shook his head, “...feels like I’m hurting her.”

Johnny Newsroom looked off into the distance and took a pensive pull of his vape. “She said she likes you?”

“Yeah. I just don’t know what’s going on.”

Johnny turned his head to look him in the eye. “Have you ever dated a trans gal before?”

Saintjohn shook his head. “I’m fuckin figuring out some shit about myself, bro.”

“It’s… she’s… let’s put it this way. Imagine if your dick looked like a scary clown.”

Saintjohn flinched. “I don’t wanna do that. I don’t wanna use my brain powers for evil.”

Johnny continued. “Imagine if every time you took off your pants, a fucked-up evil clown was staring back at you. Imagine trying to get close to someone while you’re like that. Imagine trying to have a sex life. Imagine just trying to love when you’ve got an evil clown under your pants.”

Saintjohn’s frown seemed to stretch beyond the limits of his face. “Can I stop imagining it now?”

Johnny took another pull from his vape. “I don’t think Zoey gets to stop. Everyone’s got a different relationship to their own body, I don’t know Zoey personally, but...” he trailed off, letting Saintjohn fill in the blanks for himself.

Saintjohn leaned against the side of the motorhome and sighed again. “So what am I supposed to do?”

“Do you love her?” Johnny asked.

A pause.

“She makes me happy. When she laughs at my dumbass jokes, I feel like I just cured cancer.”

Saintjohn smiled as soon as he started talking about her. Johnny knew that smile, he felt its residual warmth, the second-hand joy. He wanted the two of them to be happy. He wanted one good thing to happen in the middle of this disaster. The Midwest Autonomous Zone could burn to the ground all over again. As long as he helped two people fall in love, he would have no regrets.

“And, y’know, I wanna get all up in there,” Saintjohn said.

“Okay. Well. To answer your question. Be patient. Let her do things at her pace. Let her figure herself out. Give her space when she needs it, even if you never want to be away from her. If you mess up - and you probably will, we’re only human - swallow your pride, apologize, and try not to do it again. Trust that it will all work out.”

“That sounds really hard.”

Johnny gave him a wry smile. “That’s love.”

[later]

“I’m sorry,” Zoey sniffed, pulling away from Saintjohn, “I just can’t right now. I don’t know if I’ll ever…”

She buried her head in her hands. Her body shuddered with heavy breaths as she began to cry. Saintjohn looked at her. He considered putting a hand on her shoulder, then lowered his arm and simply sat next to her.

“It’s okay,” Saintjohn said, “I understand. You gotta deal with the evil clown.”

Zoey lifted her head. She was too surprised and confused to keep crying. “What?”

[floral-hex]

Short story, then longer vent after the cut:

Psych keeps scheduling me for telehealth. Psych changed my meds with little consultation. Psych did this on a Friday and didn’t respond to email or calls (while their office was still open for the day), so I spent the weekend grumpy and stressed about meds. Today I set up an appointment with a different psych (for tomorrow, even! Wow, what god did I please to pull off an appointment that soon?).

Still grumpy. Still stressed.

Anyway, had ANOTHER telehealth appointment with my psych on Friday. I hate telehealth. He kept saying we’d eventually do an in person, but then the session would end and I’d get an email confirmation saying the next one was telehealth. Dumb. My counselor/therapist works in the same office and told me the psych basically just works telehealth from home and sits on his laptop scrolling Fox News. Not a very personable guy, made me feel like I was in the principal’s office in our first meeting, but I’m a pushover and just went along with it.

ANYWAY (another anyway), telehealth appointment, only it’s actually just a phone call bc he can’t get his telehealth to work (second time he hasn’t gotten it to work in two months!). So me with my hearing impaired ass had to suffer through a 20 minute phone call where he was, I can only assume, on speakerphone deep in a cave somewhere. He switched around my meds, one to a dose I didn’t want to be on and another brand new that he DID NOT go over with me. Really, no explanations, just “lemme try to prescribe this new med for you. It’s called brbrbrbr and if I can’t get the pharmacy to approve it, I’ll call you back,” and that was IT. No more details. No going over interactions or side effects. Then he was rushing, saying he was late for another appointment. So we hang up, I start researching the new med and there’s lots of red flags. I email an alternative idea. No response. I call back the office and am told he’s gone and his medical assistant is gone. So… fuck it. Called today and asked to see a new psych. No problemo. New guy is at least recommended by my therapist, so I’m a bit more hopeful. No one needs to or should read this, but I wanted to vent a little.

angery. grumpery, even.

[sillygoofyqueer]

sorry i send you so many asks i might as well go live in your inbox BUT pangolin!shen yuan is SO CUTE (panyuan? shen yuangolin?), i know he LOVES climbing on wei qingwei's broad shoulders and traveling to the peaks, listening to wei qingwei talk endlessly about all the peak lords and cultivators and their swords.

as a pangolin he has no job or anything so he'd wander off to watch liu qingge train, standing there with his little paws held together in that adorable pangolin way. maybe some bai zhan kids try to kick him and liu qingge immediately punts them to the other side of the field bc everyone knows that if you mess with the pangolins, you mess with wan jian peak, and you really don't want that. or shen yuan goes to qian cao peak to watch mu qingfang work his medicine magics. an ding peak is definitely the best place for treats, esp shang qinghua who just plops a whole bag of nuts and seeds in front of him when he visits.

also he'd hide behind wei qingwei's legs, little claws clinging to his robes like a tiny scaly child whenever shen qingqiu comes by for disciple swords, because that man is intimidating and everyone is so freaking tall when you're only 80 cm long.

shen yuan has also 100% bitten people.

You've actually fallen for my trap that I set out purely to lure you into my inbox and now you're trapped here forever and ever and we WILL be having tea parties every week. Sorry. You're my friend now, that's basically what I'm like with my friends. I've just realised that I'm basically atticwifing you....but platonically. ANYWAY. Shen Yuan absorbs so much information from Wei Qingwei's rambles, even squeaking and offering little sounds to ensure that the peak lord knows that he is listening! While the rest of the sect have gotten used to this little limpet hanging onto WQW, visitors are like "is one of your peak lords actually insane" and the peak lords are like "nah just watch this" and they listen as SY seemingly RESPONDS to something WQW has said with a questioning sort of hum. Shocked Pikachu faces all around. Also, I love to think about a couple of the more spiteful, spoiled disciples of one of the peaks ganging up on poor pangolin SY because they think they're above the consequences of their actions. SY stumbles his way back to Wan Jian Peak, where he is met by WQW. The man is. Very gentle. as he treats the pangolin's wounds. Then he turns his attention to finding who has done this to his precious little pet, and all of the peak lords are reminded of just how scary WQW can be when he has a valid reason to be. The man is horrifying, normally warm and friendly smile wiped completely off his face - instead, there's a scowl. A petrifying scowl that looks out of place on his face. Let's just say that the disciples are very quickly found and...dealt with. Also!! I read the last little paragraph and just...immediately thought of a different kind of panyuan - a little demon type creature that WQW likely took in as a baby because...listen, so what if it's a demon, the shimei on the beast peak said that it's okay because "pangolin-type demons are harmless, trust me bro". This little pangolin baby has a human form, meaning WQW basically has a little baby that is sometimes a pangolin. In human form, he has his little tail and spatterings of scales over his body, and he is just a little GUY. He's just as charming as a little child, peeking out from behind WQW's robes and clinging to him, often just resorting to communicating through his little chirps and squeaks when he gets scared or far too shy for words. He is still taken to literally all of the peak lord meetings, because he's just a little guy, and god forbid anyone finds SY NOT sitting on WQW's shoulders or cuddled in his embrace. Everyone else is, at first, kind of hesitant because bro that's a child get him OUT of our meetings. Then they're hit with the big ole eyes and they fucking crumble.

[i-cant-sing]

Hmmm I could get tired over any fandom but.... batfam???? Yall would never see me tired of talking about them.

Like think just how absolutely batshit crazy they'd go if reader fractures her limb or something. Maybe reader like slips off the stairs or falls from a swing or something, and the batfam- they have to watch it all happen in slow motion, and nothing- there's absolutely nothing they can do to help you. It's scarring for Dick to watch the color drain from your face as you drip to the ground. It's scarring for Jason to hear the nasty crack as your bone bends in an ugly handle. It's scarring for Tim to hear you scream in pain. It's scarring for Damian to see the blood pour out of your body. And it's oh so heart wrenching for Bruce to hear you cry into his chest as he carries you to Alfred to get your cast done.... how hopeless he felt, unable to soothe your pain.

But things only seem to go even more downhill from there. As you recover, the family has silently decided to double down on their paranoia and be even more coddling and protective of you. You wanna walk down the stairs? Nope, here comes big bro Jason to hold your hand- or better yet, carry you around in his arms. Why risk you even tripping over air?

Wanna get something from the top shelf? Stand back, dont need the shelf or something heavy falling over your head and cracking your skull open. Let Dick pull the cookie jar down for you- but why are you even eating cookies this late???? You need to get some healthy nutrients in you, lest you should have weak frail bones. Heres your broccoli.

Wanna play video games or go on socials? Well, no more! Dont need you getting influenced by the violent storylines and bad news from around the world- Tim wouldnt your mental health to be affected. If you really want, you can use his laptop... under his supervision.

What the fuck do you think youre doing staying up past your bedtime? What do you mean youre too old to have a bedtime???? Get your ass back in bed before Damian drags you back like a gremlin and REMINDS you of the bedtime he has set for YOU, because he doesnt need you becoming an insomniac and turning insane. He will not be the one to bust you out of Arkham asylum (he absolutely would, but hed be complaining all the way) just because you decided you didnt need your 10 hours of sleep!

Wanna go to your therapist? Well, you cant cause he suddenly moved far away and every other therapist in gotham is a maniac in disguise. Bruce doesnt get why you cant just talk to him about your feelings??? Dont you trust him? Your dear father, the very man whod hold you in his arms and shield you from the scary lightening when you were young? The very man who you would ramble on to about everything and anything, including tattling on Damian locking you in his room and throwing a tantrum when Jason took you away when you were all kids? You can tell him anything sweetie, even if you wanna bitch about the batfam... it'll hurt a bit, but hed be okay (absolutely has big sad eyes when you tell him how everyones just too suffocating for you and you wanna leave them)

[pleasestayawayidonotlikeyou]

Hi love you're writing i just basically stalked your posts teehee. Can I get the younger brother group with a chubby fem reader who's family is rather rude about their weight. Like calling reader nicknames such as Big Bertha and Fatass and talking about how reader needs to eat less and buying clothes in sizes to small to motivate reader to lose weight. Really self projecting here but I could use some comfort lol Feel free to skip if you're uncomfy with it

Bro genuinely disown your parents 💀

Seriously now, something like feeling insecure about your own body because of people is unfortunately common and for some reason it makes me happy writing these, as it's a situation where comfort is due and it makes me feel fuzzy.

Featuring: Papyrus, Edge, Honey, Cash, Rus, Mutt and Coffee.

Masterlist

Papyrus

Oh! Your family's very rude, let's get out and never return!

Like, excuse you? Why are you talking shit about HIS partner?

He thought they couldn't be that bad, yet he was so wrong.

Papyrus's not the type to get angry easily, but oh boy, he's scary when mad, and trust me, your family won't ever bother you again.

He apologizes to you the moment you two leave that house, and he promises to never return to this crazy

Edge

Lectures your parents and never ever comes back.

He's a well known chef who people always love the food, so why should he care about this nasty idiots opinions again?

He motivates you to a healthy diet for you not to die of a heart attack or something, not because he thinks you need to lose weight, and it's not like he'll ever say you can or can't eat what you want.

"DON'T BEAT YOURSELF BECAUSE OF THOSE IDIOTS, THEY'RE JUST JEALOUS OF YOU."

Honey

Too lazy to move from your belly to go answer the door to your shitty parents, if they can't appreciate this then more for him.

He always complimented you since the start of your relationship, and he'll gladly do it more.

He already knows you're perfect, yet he will be

Probably donates any clothes your parents send, he just doesn't like things going completely to waste.

Cash

Well, if your family doesn't like their own child, then he already knows they're gonna despite him, in all senses.

Yet Cash is Cash, and if he ever goes to meet them, is with the sole purpose of annoying the living shit out of them.

If your parents send any type of clothes, he doesn't even see it and simply sells them on vinted or something when you're not looking and buys you clothes that actually fit and make you feel comfortable.

And if any of them dare to go to your house, he's willing to call the cops, those fuckers are not accepted even 80 km away from his home.

Rus

Fuck no. No one is allowed to say shit about his partner.

Totally doesn't do not so harmless pranks to your parents without them ever knowing it was him.

Burns anything that your parents send. He already knows what it is and he just doesn't want shit from those types of people in his house.

You may not even notice, yet he'll slowly compliment your body more and will start napping on your thighs even more.

Mutt

No. Just no.

Mutt knows what is like having a family who doesn't care nor like you, damn, his own father threw him and his brother in the streets when he was barely 6!

So, he does everything in his power not to meet your parents, if he sees them in the corner of his eye, he's already leading you the other way.

Like Rus, he burns anything that your parents send, he doesn't like them so.. why should he even keep things from them?

Coffee

Just by what you told him he does NOT want to meet your family.

And genuinely? He doesn't.

Avoids them at all costs, and it's actually really easy since he usually stays home.

Though, he will start to leave notes saying how beautiful he thinks you are and not to listen to your parents since they don't know what they're talking about.