#but he's the only one i trust to not totally fuck up a wedding

[bumblerhizal]

Hi hi hi hello, coming in with number 7 (party/museum/wedding) for the FMK alts, for Novhen, Shale, and Morrigan :D

Oh wow! You cannot take Shale to any of those! I feel like the party might be the least disastrous option. I'm not much of a partygoer myself, so when she inevitably starts a scene, it'll be a convenient way to excuse myself and leave before i robbed of every morsel of energy i went in with. If the party has a grind pit, she might just leave in disgust immediately, but hey! Saves me from that shit!

And i really, really want to take Novhen to a museum, but Morrigan seems too risky a +1 for a wedding. So Morri to the museum it is! It could be interesting. I'm not really sure if she'd like my favorite exhibits, but i have a healthy enough love of art and history to get excited about whatever she shows interest in. I'd bet she'd take great pleasure in finding an exhibit, scoffing, and then tearing apart what blatant propaganda it is. Shit, is this museum in Thedas or our world? Either way, i'm sure one of use will have plenty to say

Really, Novhen was always the only sane choice for a wedding. He can be polite and knows (and cares!) how to not embarrass everyone, and he's been to so many weddings at this point, he knows the whole song and dance. It'll be only an hour into the reception, and he'll already have the drunkenly spilled secrets of every extended family member and invitations to 3 recitals. The bus ride home will be absolutely dripping with gossip

[Ask Game]

[yuff7e]

hey! You could make a male reader x Bakugou where they have an argument and their marriage is no longer the best, so Reader asks for a divorce and Bakugou regrets it and tries everything to achieve it not happen? (with a happy ending, please!)

˗ˏˋ you’re the only thing i want. ´ˎ˗ violence / angst / fluff

male reader (could be gender neutral)

hi h0osyy !! i’ll totally write this for you !! i love me some bakugo brainrot … jejwjwjr he js such a baby !! he got that sweet baby boy syndrome he js has a hard time expressing it guys trust he’s the best he js needs all ur love !! (╥﹏╥)

the cuties song -> www.spotify.com

“okay and what the fuck do you want me to do?!” katsuki yells at you from across the room, he’s thrown about items and was seething with anger. you just stare at him, it was never supposed to get this bad. you knew he had issues, you thought he was starting to get better.. but you were wrong.

you’ve begun to fear for your life as he punched walls a little too close to you, threw utensils that would fall not that far from your head, etc. you feared your own husband was going to hurt you.

that’s when you knew you had to get out.

as you stare at him his anger rises, “speak will you?!” he screams, taking a hand and grabbing his face - clenching his jaw. “why do you never fucking speak?!” this was another one of your arguments, another scary, loud, argument.

“katsuki stop.” you cross your arms, stiffly standing against the door - he just looks at you. “you want me to fucking stop? are you serious? you’re the one that started this you bitch!” he seethes, clasping both of his hands to his sides - “you make me feel like this!”

your eyes were filled with tears at this point, when you two would have these arguments you’d have flashbacks to when you were teenagers - how he would hold you as you walked through festivals, keeping you close. smiling in your ear and kissing your cheek every so often, telling you happy he was with you, how he’d never hurt you.

now look at where this has put you both, “i thought you got better, i guess i was wrong.” you blink a few tears away, them sliding down your cheeks. “oh you’ve got to be fucking kidding me!” he bangs his fist down on the drawer beside him as he stand next to the bed you both share, you haven’t slept in the same bed for a whole week now.

you couldn’t even look at him as you gulp, your hands shaky and sweaty, your heart racing. you were scared, you knew this isn’t how a marriage is supposed to be. the more you think about the relationship you two share, the more you realize how abusive and unstable it’s become.

you’re a firm believer of stable, safe relationships. and this wasn’t one of them, you tried to say the words - but they just wouldn’t come out. you grip your arms tightly, your heart was beating so fast but you knew you had to get out of.. whatever this was.

“i want a divorce.” you croak, hot tears staining your face as you bring up a hand to wipe them away - you realized you hadn’t been wearing your wedding ring. katsuki turned around to face you, a hand on his mouth - rubbing his chin.

“yeah sure, go take a fuckin walk.” he laughs and shakes his head, putting his hands on his hips and turning away from you again. “im serious katsuki, im scared. you scare me, i.. i need out.” you confess, you were literally about to vomit.

katsuki stopped for a second, looking at the ground. he turned to you again, a more serious look on his face. “what?” “you heard what i said.” he stared, he couldn’t believe what he was hearing. “you really mean that?” he sounds a little panicked now, and he begins to walk toward you.

“yes and… please keep your distance.” he stops at your words, his hands had fallen to his sides and he looks absolutely crushed. he loved you so much, you really think he scares you? “what do you mean i scare you?”

“you just do, the way you act, the things you say. katsuki im fucking tired.” you sigh, you can hear him get choked up and you look at him. “what the fuck? no i.. i would never hurt you. i married you for a reason [name]. i want to be with you. i’m just.. tired too.” he admits, slowly walking towards you again.

you don’t stop him this time, he places his hands on your arms and you tense up. “please.. please god.. please don’t be scared of me.” he pleads, his hands began to shake.

you look at his hands and then into his eyes, he was looking down at your body - he couldn’t bare to look you in the face. you take a hand and place it on his and he breaks down, leaning into you. you break down as well, clutching onto each other in a desperate attempt to not run anyway from one another.

“i don’t want to leave you katsuki, you’re the only good thing i have in my life.. i fucking love you. i wouldn’t want to leave you but i fear i need to because of how aggressive you’ve been lately.” - “please don’t say that, you know id never hurt you. fuck [name] i’m just scared.. everything i’ve ever wanted has come true and im so used to everything failing on me.. i don’t want this to fail and… fuck..”

he grabs onto you tighter, burying his face in your neck - squeezing his eyes shut. “you’re the only thing i want, [name].” he sobs into you and you cradle him, hearing you being afraid of him is one of the things he never wanted to hear. “i want to work this out with you, im just…” you trail off, caressing the back of his head. he pulls away from your touch and looks you in the face, his eyes red and puffy, cheeks stained with tears. “im so sorry.”

you apologize and he touches your face with one of his hands, you don’t pull away or flinch you just stare at him. he leans in to kiss you and you hesitate, he waits - and you lean in too. he puts his hand behind your neck gently, holding you like glass in fear you might break under his touch.

“don’t apologize [name], this is my fault. i’ve been treating you horribly, i’ve been.. scaring you. that isn’t what a husband should do. i’m going to start treating you better from here on out - i promise, [name].” you look into his red eyes, and he looks back into yours. “i’ve wanted to be with you since the first day i saw you in that academy katsuki, and now that i finally have you i want this to work… so bad.” “i know, i know.” that comforting tone of his makes you tear up again, but he wipes the tears away.

“no more cryin’ .. we’re going to work this out.” you go in for another kiss and this one is longer, knocking the breath out of you both for a moment. you chuckle and he does too, “now you need to clean this damn room.” he blinks at you and looks behind himself, realizing how much of a mess he made. “right.” he looks back at you, “i love you.”

“i love you too, katsuki.”

—

REQUESTS : OPEN

[hello-nichya-here]

Yes, Buffy loved Spike

The way people act like that was in anyway left up to discussion by the show is legit hilarious/infuriating.

James Marsters (Spike) has said in an interview that, when Joss Whedon let him know that Spike was gonna fall in love with Buffy in season five, he had assumed it would one-sided - only for Whedon to correct him with a "Oh no, she's gonna fall in love with you too."

And the show wasn't shy about it either. Through seasons six and seven, we are shown Buffy repeatedly denying that she loves Spike - and then immediatelly contradicting herself either through actions or her own words (and even in season five she had already kissed him once after he did not give away her sister's identiy to Glory even after being tortured).

After Buffy comes back from the dead - from heaven - and is dragged to the literal hellmouth, having to crawl out of her grave, she sees the Buffy-bot being torn from limb by a bunch of demons. Naturally, this fucks with her head a bit. She manages to save her friends, but she is still very shaken, and looking like she's not really fully back to her senses as her sister is speaking to her. It really does look like something is very wrong and that she is not at all the same girl we once knew.

Then she hears Spike's voice and goes to see him. Only when she sees HIM, when HE starts trying to talk to her, when HE is the one taking care of her, does she start to properly respond. And, of course, out of all the people there - all of whom are worried about her and that she supposedly trusts way more than she trusts this "fully evil" vampire - Spike is the one to whom she reveals what actually happened to her.

During the musical episode, we see her sing "I touch the fire and it freezes me, I look into it and it's black. Why can't I feel? My skin should crack and peal - I want the fire back" confirming to us that her depression after being taken from heaven was not just a temporary consequence of the shock of it all, and has left her completely disconnected from the people she loved, and from life itself, and that she does not know if it can ever be fixed.

But at the end of the episode, after Spike stops her from basically commiting suicide (because remember, he stopped BUFFY. not the bad guy) she sings to Spike "This isn't real, but I just wanna feel" right before they kiss. And Spike's own song says "I died so many years ago. You can make me feel like it isn't so."

It is very clear that what convinced Buffy to keep on living wasn't just because Spike loved her - she already knew that, and she also her friends and this has not done anything to make her less depressed. What makes her not give up is realizing that SHE can still connect to others, SHE still can have feelings for someone. Only it is with her former mortal enemy instead of her friends and family (she had even said in an earlier episode that he was the only person she could stand to be around) and the kiss makes it obvious that this new bond she has with Spike is NOT platonic.

And the following episode when she tries to pretend it means nothing? It has her acting all flirty with Spike while they're both dealing with the amnesia spell, and once their memories return the episode ends with her kissing him AGAIN.

And during ALL of the episodes she's claming she is totally disgusted by him? She's having sex with him all the time. And when Tara finds out about it, Buffy does admit she's using him, but she refuses to give an answer when Tara asks "Do you love him?"

When Spike brings a date to Xander's wedding , Buffy KNOWS is just to get her jealous and Spike even admits to it - and she admits that, even knowing all of that, it DOES bother her. She is unbelievably distraught after finding out he slept with Anya, and even says to his face "I have feelings for you, I do. But it's not love. I could never trust you enough for that" showing us that the thing stopping Buffy from truly giving Spike a chance is, understandably, the "You're a literal souless creature that needs to feed on people to survive" factor, not because their connection is not genuine or strong enough, or because of her past with Angel.

Not to mention, it makes perfect sense that, during the season she was clearly suicidal, she falls in love with the character that is representing the possibility of her death - their first time even happens after Spike reveals that, for some reason, the chip no longer causes him pain when he attacks her, and thus he actually poses a threat to her again.

Unhealthy? Absolutely. Scary? Fuck yes. Does she get over her "feelings that are totally not love" in the season finale, when she's crawling "out of her grave" again, this time triumphantly, in the sunlight, all brave and finally letting go of her self loathing? NOPE!

In season seven, when she's finally about to go out with a man that is not and has never been evil, her friends are all obviously wondering if this is a sign that she is over Spike - of if she's just pretending to. Buffy's response? THE biggest Freudian Slip she's ever had in the series.

"Why does everyone in this house think that I'm still in love with Spike?"

STILL!

Still. In. Love.

Not "Why is everyone convinced that I fell in love with Spike? I told you guys I liked him, but didn't love him" but "Why do you guys think I'm not over those totally vague, definitively not deep 'feelings' I had and that were 100% not just a code for 'Yes, I am in love with him, but I'm scared it will blow up in my face'?"

And how does that date with that Not Evil guy, that was revealed to be the son of Slayer, go? Pretty well! It looks like this romance might actually have a chance of going somewhere.

At least until she goes "Look, I know Spike killed your mom when he was souless and all, but if you try to go after him to get revenge again, he will murder you, and I will let him." She also turns her back on her watcher, and father figure, when she finds out he was in on the plan to kill this vampire that is Totally-Not-Her-Boyfriend.

The episode even has Giles directly compare her codependent bond with Spike to what she had with Angel - which again, included her letting Angelus get away and kill people. Sure, Spike has a soul now, he let the dude live to tell the tale since killing his mom WAS an awful thing to do, and if he was attacked again and killed him it would be self-defense - but it's impossible not to notice the very clear "Buffy is protecting her man" tone of it all.

Not to mention, before that, Spike offers to leave Sunnydale since Buffy's potential new boyfriend clearly can help her find demons and thus she no longer needs him around - and she full on says that SHE IS NOT READY FOR HIM NOT TO BE THERE.

Then, of course, there's "Touched." The episode in which EVERYONE is going "We might die tomorrow, lets fuck to cope", and not only is Buffy clearly touched (Get it? Get it?) by Spike's speech about how much he loves her, she asks him to get in bed with her and hold her. And even though they are not having sex, the scenes of them cuddling are being framed as being just as intimate and romantic as the scenes of everyone else making love to their partners. Again, we had Giles full on state the obvious to Buffy: she and Spike might not be sleeping together anymore, but they are VERY clearly acting like they're still in a relationship, even if both are now hesitant to give it a try after literally everything went wrong for them.

The following day, Spike says that it was the happiest night of his life, and when he starts saying that he knows it obviously didn't mean as much for Buffy as it did to him, she corrects him and says it absolutely did. Spike even goes as far as trying to confirm it AGAIN by asking "Were you there with me?" to which Buffy says "I was", which is HUGE considering she had just admited to him the previous night that she had always cut herself off from everyone - Spike VERY much included - due to being the slayer.

"Oh, but what about the Bangel kiss in the finale?"

The one Joss Whedon explicitly refered to as "the show's way of servicing the Bangel fans" aka FANSERVICE? The one that came right out of nowhere as the signature of Bangel's "romantic chemistry" is angsty pining? The one that didn't hold a candle to one of the few Bangel scenes I say absolutely worked, aka the kiss after Angel comes back to Sunnydale to help Buffy deal with her grief over her mother and that only happened after they had spend HOURS together because, surprise surprise, it doesn't matter if they still have feelings for each other, they have NEVER had this dynamic of exes that just casually make out with each other the second they are in the same room together?

The one that happens right before Buffy says "Sorry, you won't be the vampire champion that will save the world, I'm chosing Spike for that role"? The one that is followed by an obviously jealous Angel making it very clear to Buffy that he is bitter she's "brushing him off for captain peroxide"? And then she asks if he'll react that way everytime she gets a BOYFRIEND?

When Angel points out that, again, she just let slip how she actually feels about Spike, Buffy has to deny it because Joss Whedon thought the ONLY way to make sure viewers didn't miss that Buffy is totally an independent woman that don't need no man was to tease both the possibility of a Bangel AND a Spuffy endgame just to go "Sorry, Buffy is gonna choose to be single."

HOWEVER, even the way she does that has changed significantly, as she says "He is not my boyfriend, but he is in my heart." Notice how, unlike all the previous times, Buffy is not trying to diminish what she has with Spike.

She went from "I slept with Spike/said I feelings for him BUT this totally means nothing and I could NEVER love him because he doesn't have a soul like Angel did" to "Look, Angel, I swear that Spike is totally not my boyfriend BUT I will treat him like he is because I absolutely do have feelings for him. Could you pretty, pretty please go back to L.A. now that the fanservice moment is over? I'll even end it with a 'sometimes I totally think of what could happen between us someday' so we can pretend our romance has not been officially pronounced 'impossible to ever be endgame' since season three of my show and season one of your show?"

And where does she immediatelly go to after this? To see Spike. Because she wants another night of cuddling with him. Then The First shows up in the middle of the night to torment her, he explicitly refers to Spike as Buffy's vampire LOVER.

Finally, the final battle is happening, and Spike is about to die saving the world, and Buffy, with tears in her eyes finally says that she loves him. Whedon had even said to Sarah "Be proud of him. Love him when saying it." We even see literal flames as they are holding hands - an obvious nod to the musical, with the "I want the fire (feeling) back", and Whedon basically confirmed it by saying it was a very deliberate choice to symbolize the feelings the characters have for each other. It is the visual representation of Buffy FINALLY accepting that she truly does love Spike.

"Oh, but he responds 'No, you don't, but thanks for saying it' implying Buffy was only trying to make sure he would die happy!"

Did you guys forget EVERYTHING ELSE I just mentioned in this post? Or the fact, at that point, Spike is still processing the guilt of all the monstruous things he did as a vampire now that he has a soul again? Did you forget him literally asking Buffy to kill him for what he did and telling her that the soul did not suddenly make him good - only for HER to be the one to say he fought back against the monster inside of him and that she believes in him?

Again, James Marsters gave us his insight on what he felt Spike meant by that line and how he played it: Spike was saying that Buffy COULDN'T love him. Not yet. Because he didn't feel he deserved it yet. It was not the right time for them. Yet.

"Oh, but in the late seasons of Angel, when Spike is brought back to life, he is told that Buffy never truly loved him!" Yeah, he is told that - BY ANGEL! In what world would he, Buffy's ex that has had problems with Spike since long before Buffy was even born and that had already admited that having her pick Spike over him "did not bring out the champion in him", not be extremely biased?

"But you're forgetting the Buffy comics in which she is basically told Angel is her soulmate and sleeps with him during some magical fuckery that made her go mad with power!"

Yeah, and in those same comics, even though it took forever and Whedon just HAS to force the "Buffy ends the story chosing to be single because she can either be a strong female character OR be in a happy relationship" AGAIN, she and Spike became a couple after all of that, with her explicitly telling him WHAT SHE HAD WITH ANGEL IS IN THE PAST, and the ending even suggests is only a matter of time before she and Spike get back together again, this time for good.

Claiming that it was up for debate if Buffy ever truly loved Spike is as ridiculous as if I said "I know we are both shown and told many times that Angel and Buffy slept together in season two, but I actually think it's up for the debate if they truly did" NO, IT ISN'T!

We are shown how Buffy's feelings for Spike grow over time, how her dynamic with him changes, how she is actively choosing him over everybody else after he gets his soul, and both the character and the people involved in making the show EXPLICITLY SAY she loves him.

You can dislike it, but don't expect everyone else to cover their ears and close their eyes to pretend it wasn't clear that Spike's love for Buffy has not been one-sided for a VERY long time.

[intimidating-fettuccine]

Can I request headcanons about Jason when he start organizing everything for his wedding with the reader? Not that specific day, I mean when the reader agrees to marry him and this man starts planning everything, I wonder what it will be like 👀

This got a bit long, but I hope you enjoy :)

Jason is SO FUCKING EXCITED to plan your wedding?? I mean the guy likes creating and organizing things, and so your wedding is like the magnum opus of all of the things he's ever wanted to do, especially because he gets to do it with you. As I have said before though, in any request about marrying Jason, your wedding is going to have to be pretty big. Jason has a reputation he's made and clawed his way up to the higher class society of the Underworld, and there are quite a lot of higher class demons and eldritch beings expecting invitations to your wedding once it's announced that the two of you are engaged. However, now that this thought is finally occurring to me, I think if you'd like to have a secret smaller wedding first with just you two and your closest friends and families, he's absolutely fine with that and would plan accordingly. He's very put together and mature about how he handles things, and he has such an eye for details that he wouldn't forget anything or let anything slip past him and end up incorrect.

Due to this, for the big wedding, Jason ends up quite particular. I've always seen the reception in my head happening in a very large and open ballroom, and I think he'd like the actual ceremony to be in a beautiful, open field with lots of flowers and trees surrounding you. I think he'd want the wedding colors to be red and black, but if you'd like different colors Jason is also fine to do a split theme. He does ask your opinion on literally everything he does because as much as he loves planning things, it is your day as well. When it comes to the flowers, I think he'd actually default to your opinion. He may want a say in the color, but when it comes to the actual flowers he wants them to be your favorite flowers. If you suggest doing half your favorites, and half of them his favorites, he feels quite flustered and happy about that and is very willing to go with that idea. I feel like he would also leave most of the menu up to you as well. It's taking place in the Underworld, but if you want all of your favorite human dishes to make up the entire menu, he wouldn't mind, as he'd want you to be able to eat and enjoy every single food item the two of you would have there.

When it comes to desserts, I think he'd want the entire wedding cake to be for just the two of you. It's something I personally have seen at a couple of weddings, and I feel like Jason would absolutely love it. When it comes to the guests, you can have separate cakes and other desserts for them to enjoy that the two of you could also partake in, but the actual wedding cake Jason feels would be more special if the two of you picked a flavor you both liked and had a small, personal cake of for the two of you to cut and eat together. Jason would also TOTALLY hand make little wedding toppers that look like the two of you. When it comes to the outfits the two of you will be wearing, Jason wants to definitely make his own outfit himself. When it comes to yours, if you'd indulge him and be okay with it, Jason would really, truly love it if you'd let him make your own outfit so the two of you could match. However, if you insist it has to be a secret from him, he would probably request that you allow Trender to make it (as Trender is pretty much one of the only fashion designers in the Underworld Jason trusts), and he'd give Trender Jason's plans for his own outfit, that way even if it's not exactly what Jason wanted, the two of you could still match (I would just let Jason do it personally though if you really could). When it comes to music, he'd let you both go 50/50 on the playlists, and I think he'd let you choose the first dance song. While Jason wants creative freedom in the wedding, he's definitely not a groomzilla of any sort, and he is very fair and open with whatever you might like to be in the wedding as well. He views it as a day for both of you and thinks you should both be equally happy with the ceremony and reception. He loves you more than anything in the entire universe, and he truly just wants the wedding to be done and over with so he can call you his spouse both emotionally and legally, and get started on spending the rest of your lives together.

[berryhobii]

OMG HI😭😭i love your writing so much like im obsessed you’re so talented!!! i see your request are open and i just wanted to see if you do something where it’s after Yoongi and Y/N get into petty argument and Y/N is like “you know what? whatever” and gives Yoongi the silent treatment however, Yoongi hates being ignored (especially by his girl) so after giving her some space for a few hours and trying to get her to talk to him, he’s had enough oh the silence and decides to take matters into his own hands 🫣 I HOPE THIS MADE SENSE😭😭😭this thought has been running rampant in my mind for a week and i would love to see how you would write this ! there’s no rush, take your time if you don’t feel like it that’s TOTALLY okay i just want you to know that you’re writing is IMMACULATE, chefs mf kiss 🤌🏾 and that’s you are so freaking talented!! thank you for sharing your writing with us🥰🥰💕

Ahhhhhh! I love you so much! Your requests have given me such good ideas! I hope I fulfilled this one well. It turned into kind of brat tamer Yoongi who loves reader to pieces because I love everything about that trope. I really hope you love it bb!🩵🩵🩵

~

“Turn left up here!”

“I know where I’m going!”

“Obviously not! The parking lot will be full by the time we get there.”

Currently, you and your husband were on the way to your favorite store to spend some more of the gift cards you got at your wedding. You received so many and Yoongi made you agree that you’d only use them for important things.

New stuff for Holly counted as important, right? Of course it did.

A few months ago, you two moved to a new neighborhood which meant you didn’t really know where everything was.

As designated passenger princess, it was your responsibility to look hot, control the music and also manage the GPS to get you places but Yoongi wanted to trust his car’s GPS more than you. Ridiculous right?

He sighed. “I know where I’m going, okay? I don’t need your help.”

Your mouth dropped, a scandalized and dramatic gasp passing your glossed lips. How dare he?!

Crossing your arms over your chest, you slumped in the passenger seat. “You know what? Whatever, Yoongi.” You mumbled.

Silence enveloped the car, only the low sound of J.Cole’s melodic voice filling the space.

Yoongi glanced over at you, a smile threatening his lips at your pouty face. Ugh, you were such a spoiled little brat but he loved you so much. He actually took pleasure in riling you up and watching you get all huffy. Everytime he saw that princess personality, it awakened something in him—a need to both smother you with kisses and spank your ass until you were crying.

He reached over to place a large hand on your thigh. “Come on baby. Don’t be upset.”

You ignored him, fully turning your body towards the window. Uh oh, your full super bratty mode was activated.

“Are you really gonna ignore me?” He pondered.

No answer.

“Baby please. I’m sorry.”

Nothing.

He guessed he’d have to roll with this.

When Yoongi pulled into the parking lot of your favorite store, he tried to talk to you again but you were already out of the car.

Unfortunately, whenever you were upset with Yoongi, you got a sudden stroke of independence. He normally opened your door for you so he knew you were really upset when you did it yourself.

You didn’t talk to him the entire time through the store but you almost broke when you passed the pillows.

“Look baby. They have those pillows you were looking at.”

You picked one up before turning to Yoongi, opening your mouth to say, “yeah they…..” but you cut yourself off, remembering your vow of silence. He raised an eyebrow, waiting for you to speak but you held it. Tossing the pillows into the cart, you continued through the store, hands hurting from how hard you gripped the handles.

You couldn’t fight that skip in your heart. He remembered the pillows…..you told him about those weeks ago…..fuck.

You didn’t even notice Yoongi’s sly smirk as he walked behind you. He knew this silent treatment wouldn’t last long and he was honestly kind of amused. He knew you wanted to talk to him but your pride wouldn’t allow you to break first, not until you felt like it. He guessed he’d have to put up with your silent treatment a little longer.

Besides, with you walking ahead of him, he could stare at your perfect ass in those stretch pants all he wanted. His hand itched to grab it but he resisted. He didn’t want to make you more upset…..on purpose.

Yoongi ended up having to practically fight you with the bags, insisting he’ll put them back in the cart and push them to the car. You weren’t happy but you also didn’t argue, huffing and puffing your way back to the car.

Yoongi didn’t unlock the doors until he was finished putting the bags in the trunk which was getting you even more riled up. He knew you wanted to open your own door but doing it for you was just more amusing.

You squinted your eyes at him in frustration, throat burning with the desire to tell him off but you got in the car anyway, still completely silent.

The drive home was silent, as was the short journey up to your apartment. Holly greeted you both at the door, the wiggly dog jumping all over you. You didn’t even try to go through the bags, just heading straight for your bedroom where you could ignore Yoongi better. And of course, Holly followed you, not sparing Yoongi a passing glance.

Traitor, Yoongi thought.

He sighed but left you alone. He knew you weren’t that upset about what he said in the car. You were just being stubborn. He spoiled you too much. He could also be kind of passive(he’s working on it) as well so perhaps this was proving to be a little test for him.

After putting away the few grocery items and leaving the rest of your choices for you to sort through, he flopped down on the couch.

It was quiet.

Too quiet.

He liked his peace and quiet as much as the next person but the noise you brought was different. He had grown used to hearing you singing under your breath or talking to yourself as you thought about dinner or the crash of all of your hair products falling because you had so many and they didn’t fit right in the hallway closet.

You had ingrained yourself into his life—you and your own perfect little storm of gentle chaos.

He missed you. Even though you were in the next room. He missed you.

Standing from the couch, he walked down the hall to the bedroom. He couldn’t hear anything on the other side.

His knuckles rapped gently against the wood before he opened he door. “Baby?”

He found you laid on your back on the bed, phone held over your face as you scrolled through social media. Holly was resting on his dog bed in the corner, little head lifting as Yoongi entered.

“Go.” He motioned to the door. Holly tilted his head in a way that solidified Yoongi’s suspicion that his dog was secretly a human. Human or not, Holly knew better than to stick around.

Yoongi closed the door before focusing his attention back on you.

He approached the bed, leaning a knee on it. You could feel the dip but made no move to acknowledge him.

“Baby please. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean what I said. Of course I need you. I love when you tell me where to go but then you get distracted so we miss the turn. Remember we were late to our rehearsal dinner?”

Your lip twitched at the memory. Of course you do. The excitement of your wedding being the next day had you so caught up in your then fiancé that you couldn’t even focus on giving directions. And thanks to Yoongi being equally distracted by how stunning you were, he didn’t even think to make sure you stayed focused enough to give directions. He missed the exit twice before finally getting on track. Nevertheless, it was still a memorable evening with his family and close friends.

And the precursor to the rest of a wonderful life with you.

You still continued to ignore him. You could hear the sincerity in his apology but you wanted to make him sweat just a little bit longer.

But even Yoongi had a breaking point and you were crossing it.

“Baby.”

No answer.

Alright. Breaking point crossed.

~

“Why do you have to make everything so difficult? Ignoring me, “he scoffed with a shake of his head and landing a sharp smack to your ass. “You’re crazy.”

Your head was buried in the blankets, shoulders pressed against the bed and wrists held tightly in Yoongi’s grip.

His hips were slamming into your ass hard enough to hurt, his thick cock stretching your walls to their limit. He was thick enough to give you that slightly searing stretch and long enough to make you feel it all the way to your deepest parts.

“Mm, Yoongi!” You cry out as his strokes became longer, pulling himself all the way out to the tip remained before slamming back inside. He grits his teeth at your walls sucking him in as if they didn’t want him to go. Thank goodness for his stamina. After meeting you, he’s had to learn how restrain himself longer than ever. He never used to cum quick before meeting you. And yes, that was one of the many reasons he pursued you. “F-fuck….you feel so good.”

You arched your back more, lifting your ass so that he could reach even deeper.

“Don’t ignore me again. Do you understand?” He landed another slap on your bouncing ass, loving the recoil.

Your eyes rolled to the back of your head, face feeling hot from your breath that kept blowing back from how your face was pressed into the mattress.

Everything felt too tight, too hot, too sweaty, too good.

“Yes! I’m sorry!” You cried.

Releasing your wrists, he grabbed at your braids, twisting them around his wrist a few times. Waist length were definitely a smart investment.

He pulled you up until you were “balanced” on your hands because let’s face it, those things were numb as hell. His hold on your hair was really the only thing keeping you upright.

“Sorry for what? Apologize properly.”

He wanted you to form full sentences? That was like asking Jada to stop talking about Tupac. Impossible.

Another stroke knocked your speech centers loose, third orgasm since you started bubbling in your lower belly.

Yoongi could feel your walls clenching up, your moans growing louder at each thrust. Oh no you don’t.

He stopped his hips, still buried deep in your cunt. You whined as your orgasm ebbed away, wiggling your hips in an attempt to throw yourself back on his cock but a hand on your hip made you still.

“You’re not cumming until you apologize properly. Now, what aren’t you gonna do again?”

You swallowed, lip quivering and tears welling up. “I…I won’t ignore you again.”

He grinned. “Apology accepted.”

His hips set a punishing pace, your ass ricocheting off his hips. It had you moaning in ecstasy, nearly slipping from his grasp but he wrapped an arm under your breasts to keep you steady.

“Shit, I love this pussy. So. Fucking. Good.” Each word was punctuated with a thrust.

Your hand reached back to claw at his side, the slight sting making him groan and thus pushing him faster.

He yanked your hair until your back was pressed flush against his chest, his hips never slowing down. Almost instantly, you turned your head, seeking his lips as you always did when you were close. His heart fluttered, loving how affectionate you were.

You almost miss his lips from how absolutely feral he was going in your poor cunt. Fortunately, he tilts your head better with his grip on your hair, kissing your wet pout. The tenderness has your heart swooning despite all the chaos. He sucks at your tongue, leaving a light bite on your bottom lip as well.

“Gonna cum, my sweet girl?” He whispers in your ear, nipping at the skin.

You didn’t need to answer him, you’re growing moans enough to confirm. The hand that wasn’t scratching at his skin raises up to bury in his hair, yanking his strands similar to how he was doing you causing him to grunt in delight.

The arm around your body moved down to rub circles into your clit and you swore you saw the upper room. He buried his face in the side of your neck, inhaling your sweaty skin, lips leaving kisses and bites along the side of your throat.

His hips move even faster than before, desperate to carry you to your orgasm before he lost his shit. Pent up from that brief denial and riddled from your previous orgasms, you’re quick to crumble against him. Twisting in his hold, you cry out his name that’s like music to his ears.

“Yoongiiiiiiiiii! Cum in me, baby. Want you so bad….”

Your walls grip him tighter than a vice, his hips stuttering with careless abandon as he gives you exactly what you want. The sensitivity between your thighs burns in the best ways, little gasps coming from you another tiny orgasm washes over you.

“Ugh, fuck.” The last few sluggish ruts of his hips make both of you whine and gasp, his grip on you tightening and then loosening as his body shudders.

Your body falls forward on the mattress, muscles and bones weary and your eyes drooping as exhaustion weighs on them. You feel Yoongi flop down next to you, only the sound of his slightly hurried breaths filling the room.

“Not falling asleep on me, are ya?” He asks after a few seconds. He turns his head to find you are, in fact, beginning to doze off.

“No.” You fib, rolling your achy body over and holding up one arm. “Come kiss me.”

His smile is as sweet as him. He scoots over to bury himself in your warmth. Your arm wraps around him as his head lifts to give you your requested kisses.

“I love you.” You confess against his lips.

He hums. “Love you too. Even though you’re bad at giving directions.”

You roll your eyes but continued to peck at his lips. “Marry your GPS then.”

“I already have.” He hugs you closer. “And I wouldn’t give her up for anything.”

[chaoticdelinqueerwithglitter]

can you imagine telling me 'bonten tl harutaku, pretty boyfriends, that's all" and then not immediately saying more? Like, thanks for setting the autism rabbit hole 😔

Well, in my defense I assumed there was not much to say about Bonten HaruTaku for two reasons:

When could they interact if Takuya is having a good future?

Sanzu "has" Mikey there. Big stretch bc Mikey is an empty shell of himself, but yeah, being his right hand is difficult to imagine him not totally focused on Mikey (is his special interest and we all know it✨). Even more with interacting with anyone outside Bonten. He has to keep the depressed twink alive + a whole organization running like it had a functional boss (okay, Koko helps a lot with anything money related, but violence? That's Haru's deal and I'm pretty sure that as much unhinged as he can be, he works himself for 3 people minimum. Is for Mikey, so no more questions your honor 😌)

BUT!

It has been brought to my attention by @fredlikesbreakfast that we don't see Takuya in Pah-chin's wedding or at any point of the "good future" interactions on Toman's side.

(Also, I'm gonna be using his headcanons about Takuya, bc I'm not a Takuya expert and I trust his wisdom on this. Go read them, everyone!)

And.... This.

Just watch this and how I'm about to build sandcastles over fucking nothing, okay?

(Did I wanted an excuse to show choker Takuya in full color? Yeah, sue me xD)

And then, we get Bonten introduced with some random traitors meeting their "fate"...

(Wakui and his realisim, I just noticed the puddle, argh)

(yeah, Haru is talking alone in here, saying nonsense, right? Is he? Is he talking to that random or to the one next to him? 👀)

ARE YOU ALL SEEING IT? WHO THAT RANDOM BLONDE COULD BE?

Okay, first of all, before talking about harutaku I need to put some context in bonten harumai situation, so bear with me, please! (Haru never got to be his own person, this tl is when he's more of a lost cause and erased himself for Mikey more than ever, so... For understanding Haru, we need to look at his (not) relationship with Mikey 😮‍💨)

Canon facts? Wakui told us that Mikey barely tolerates anyone at this point and he can only stand Sanzu 🔥 Oh, and has no libido whatsoever (not surprising, anorexic depressed twink much)

That means their codependency is canon, hell yeah!

But, and that's a big one... Mikey is terrified of love bc that would mean having someone to grieve and he can't go there. Besides, he's trying to build a good future for everyone else, so if he admits having feelings for Sanzu... Where would that leave him? Having to push him away for his own good too? (Like Haru wouldn't stay no matter what but shhh, Mikey is depressed and biased)

So yeah, Mikey needs Sanzu, but at the same time, he can't get too close to him. What leads to a pretty fucked up situation where Haru is forced again and again to have to guess Mikey's moods and whims and to never known if he's gonna be welcomed or not.

(Besides the "small" detail of Haru scars being a reminder of Mikey's darkness and what he could do, so... Yeah, complicated)

My personal hc is that they used to be a thing✨ during Kanto Manji times. Until Haru made the mistake of dropping the word love, what turned out into Mikey stopping it all together. One thing is to lie to himself that this is just casual sex, but love? Yeah, no, that can't be.

Why is all of this important? Because it means we have a Haruchiyo who got to be with Mikey for some months and then lose it. An openly rejected Haruchiyo who still stays glued by Mikey's side (Mikey stopped the sex, but still needed him) and who is the only one Mikey tolerates. Are you seeing it? He is at his most delulu and unrequited version of his obsession love for Mikey. 🙃

The setting is twisted and messed up from the start, even before Takuya appears in here 😭

THEY ARE GONNA BE DOOMED FROM THE START!

(Well, no surprises considering how it ends I guess xD)

Okay, we have a Takuya that is trying to find his own path in live. Or at least, to separate himself from Takemichi and be his own persona. What is the opposite of the old Toman goodies who are trying to build a normal and happy life? Get involved with gangs again, ofc! 🔥

For some reason I think he got involved when it was still Kanto Manji. Probably bc it feels more reachable than Bonten? But also, if we go with the hcs of last teen years starting with weed and mixing stuff? He had to buy it somewhere and teen gangs feels like a good choice. Koko was there too, they didn't share much time on the 1st division, but is also someone he knows (and who unlike Kakucho who joins later, is in that gang from the start)

So Takuya starts dealing with drugs. You need money to maintain addictions, it is what it is. Small dealing that gets more serious as he grows up. His ability to be an npc seems pretty useful to deal with drugs on the street, ngl. So he ends up getting promoted due to the fact that his numbers are good (Koko here looking for people who is good at making money). Not a big promotion, he's not a higher up. But he's not a nobody either anymore.

That's Sanzu's cue to enter. He is a paranoid gremlin, we all know that. No way he won't stalk suspect on Takuya, when he's aware he was one of Takemichi's friends – who Sanzu hates and calls stinky (jealous much 🙄).

I think this will be around Bonten creation, first couple of years? What also means Senju just died, ugh. More unstable Sanzu, yey! (but also, in more need for comfort and he can't find it on his king, so that also adds to the mix)

Sanzu discovers Takuya is actually on his own and doesn't have much contact with the Mizo gang – less and less everyday – no more than someone could have with ex-classmates. What yeah, saves Takuya's ass (for now), but makes him curious. Why did Takuya part ways with the others? What is about this guy and why is he different that Sanzu assumed he will be? How did he managed to separate himself from who used to be the center of his life? (that last question is one Haru would never admit even to himself bc it feels like a betrayal, but is there. Unconsciously floating on his brain, no doubt)

Pretty sure, again, Haru is the one approaching to Takuya (for not work related purposes, they might have interact before). Junkie radar also works here, but well, is more obvious on both sides, so no need for any radar I guess? 🤣

Differences that I clearly see in their relationship here?

Sanzu is his boss, that for starter. The power dynamics are more unbalanced than ever bc here, Haru is the second in command and pretty confident about it (he has reasons to be, let's be real, Bonten would crumble without him or Koko)

What means that vulnerability he showed sometimes in Bad Toman? That morning after care? Takuya being able to see some cracks on his walls? Forget about it. Not happening. He has to be the perfect right hand (for Mikey), so he can't show weakness to an underling. He can't stop and acknowledge his exhaustion or feelings either, has to keep going.

He's high all the damn time, but also miraculously functioning more. So not as easy to have a situation where he calls Takuya in a moment of weakness.

Unsafe rough sex, so many dubious situations plus more marked bdsm dynamics.

Also, this one can sound weird, but at the same time, Haru is gonna be more demanding of affection. Had a terrible meeting or didn't sleep in 48h bc work? "Takuya, come here and pet my hair, I need to be pampered." Clingy as usual but more openly? Probably even more needy and craving of love now that I think about it 🤔 Bc he spends his days by Mikey's side, feeling the constant rejection.

As long as the years keep passing tho, I think Haru starts crumbling. Slowly and just showing lil pieces, but... Have you seeing Bonten Mikey? He looks too much like tl0 Mikey. NO WAY HARU IS NOT GRADUALLY GETTING TRIGGERED WATCHING THE SIMILARITIES GROWING MORE EVERY DAY! *insert screaming cat in here please*

Takuya sees that. He sees that Haru is more burned out every day, but also, that he comes back from his time with Mikey worse and worse every day. More irascible and grumpy, easier to jump and go violent. But also more clingy and a total emotional mess. Nightmares every night? No doubt either. (or at least when he sleeps, ugh)

Where I'm going with this? Welp... We need Takuya getting killed, right? And why? Why did he end up like that? As much as he can be dumb with his friendships, I think Takuya is smart enough to not try to betray Bonten. Especially if he has 💫something💫 with Sanzu. It's a suicide and a way to kill their relationship all at once. Feels odd.

But what if what Takuya did was something different? What if out of worry he started to point out to Haru that he was looking more drained every day? That he should rest from time to time. Small things here and there, that depending on Haru's mood would make him feel touched (someone sees him enough to notice this, someone cares) or annoyed (he can't admit it, he can't stop, remember?)

And Takuya starts feeling a lil confident with saying those things. Bc Sanzu also got softer with the years, more caring in a weird crazy way (he learns to appreciate the only place where he feels seen).

I also have no doubt Takuya has been biting his tongue for years about the fact that Haru runs when Mikey calls or text him. No matter the hour or what he was doing. Literally. Mid sex? Yeah, "sorry Takuya, my king needs me, see you!" (terrible xD)

Maybe one day Sanzu arrives at Takuya more exhausted than usual. He didn't sleep in 3 days, he just want to be hugged and pampered, to not be alone with his own demons. Is painfully obvious that he's so broken, that Takuya feels protective. And oh, Mikey calls Sanzu when he finally fell asleep? And he just answers and says he'll be there in a few minutes? 💀

Takuya explodes. I have a vision of Haru getting dressed and clenching his jaw bc he doesn't have the time to deal with this bullshit, hissing a "careful" as an only warning. While Takuya is saying that this is not normal, that Haru is killing himself for Mikey, for someone who doesn't even appreciate him (will he go as far to say that doesn't deserve it? Unsure, but that is a nice touch, ngl).

That's it. That settles it for Sanzu. Takuya must die, he showed he's not really loyal to Mikey (and what's worse, but Haru won't admit, he told him so truths and put a mirror in front of him)

I can even go further and say the way Sanzu chooses to kill him is totally on purpose. He can't make it personal, can't he? Admit to himself that again, he wanted something of his own? That he craved love and willingly accepted it from someone else that wasn't Mikey? No way, he had that once (Mucho, you'll always hurt 🥲). This time, he kills Takuya with a gun, not katana-chan. And with two other randoms. Because this is not personal, this is business (yeah, keep lying to yourself, Haru)

And the words he says? "Bring down Bonten's hammer of judgment"? Considering Mikey almost never talks and when he does is to Haru.... Yeah, Haru babu, you're Bonten judge and executor. You're the one translating Mikey's will to the rest (what explains why Bonten is so freaking unhinged btw xD).

He is the one judging Takuya. Period.

Also, that "shhh" moment? Pointing out to the three tied people that they should listen to the king, that what Mikey says is law? That feels like a last message to Takuya now.

So, ummmm.... Remember when I said I was about to build a huge harutaku headcanon from nothing? Yeah? Here it was, I hope someone read it until the end and enjoy it xD

(I might add some things later, who knows. But I'm also totally open to others adding to it, let's keep building harutaku together, yey! 💜)

[alexanderlightweight]

Hello! For Writing Wednesday could we please have some more Spoils of War or Created for Death? I’m obsessed with both of these to an insane degree:

What I love about SoW: tentative!Alec whom Magnus has to work at gaining trust from? I love it. There’s a line in one part about Magnus having to fix how the Clave broke Alec before Magnus can gentle him and I just—gorgeous, perfect, headcannon accepted. Veiled consorts? Hooooooly that’s so cool omg I swear I heard a symphony in my head when I realized where you were going. The mask? Alec’s hesitance and obedience, thinking everything is out to hurt him but doing it anyway because what choice does he have, is so beautiful, and Magnus mourning a little that he didn’t have more time to make the experience better for Alec but not willing to risk the delay and risk Alec growing even more distant is just 😍—lmao I could write an essay about how much I love this universe.

CoD: I fucking love eldritch angel nephilim and this is giving EVERYTHING. Nephilim who are cobbled together projects of the angels, their biology so skewed by angelic power that even the nephilim don’t know what their children will look like/heal like/die like. Mostly the difference being subtle, but sometimes Not. Raised to hate and fear their full potential, anything that is Too Angelic, and Alec a living hearsay/blasphemy even when his blood was only 30/70 because if it. AND THEN. It’s not losing Jace that tips Alec over, it’s Magnus dying—demon-born prince/king of edom enemy of the Clave. So gorgeous, holllyyyy. I can’t even think too much about Magnus collaring 6-winged Alec, about Alec kneeling for him, about the terrible kindness and protection in Izzy disowning her brother, about the gentleness of Magnus hiding Alec away and covering his eyes and hushing him because even the ANGELS wouldn’t know what to do in this situation, with this new body, and then Team Immortal coming in and IMMORTALITY and wow

Anyway yeah sorry for spitting up my lovestruck brain in your asks but I had to make sure that you knew you’ve struck me deeply with your writing and that’s why I’m begging on your doorsteps for literally any content in either one of these verses 💜

i'm very glad both stories are being enjoyed so much and please don't apologize i love stuff like this! it's a huge compliment but also it's just really nice to see that other people are as into and obsessed with my verses as i am. because sometimes i wait for my sleep meds to kick in and i just plot where i'm going and end up passing out in the middle of a mental scene being written lol

so i wrote a thing for spoils of war and thank you! i'm glad it was enjoyed because i have this big headcanon about how consorts are really magically important to warlocks and magical kings if dominion magic is in the fic and a big thing about that is protecting the consorts identity. via masks but also cloaking the consort in so much magic that you can't even tell anything abut them besides what the warlock allows you to know. and there is a lot of history thats hinted at

-

for created for death

izzy was fucked up about that, okay. but she had to relinquish alec as a brother because otherwise the clave still had ties to him. since they don't need them anymore, the clave sort of doesn't let true nephilim have any rights. so alec had to be disowned as a nephilim and then magnus was basically like 'okay but my magic is on him so hes mine since i calmed him down' and izzy was like 'he totally counts as a weapon. yours now. because thats the safest thing for alec atm

so alec is actually 70/30 and most nephilm are 30/70 in a angelic/mundane equation. which is why he was being kept watch over by the clave but uh, the fear of magnus dying kinda made him lose it

i hope you enjoy this!

<3 lumine

spoils of war

—

Alec doesn’t know what’s going on.

Magnus didn’t bother explaining what the ritual was or what it did beyond that it was yet another bonding ceremony. But even their political wedding that signified the end of a war didn’t feel this elaborate.

Alec knows it doesn’t really matter, that he’ll be taking part in the ritual whether he knows what it does or not. In fact, it's almost better not to know than to know what he might need to do.

Alec can’t say no to whatever is going to happen and he knows that, so he takes comfort in the fact that he can still see. The mask has magic in and through it and Alec tries not to consider where it’s from and why he can feel nephil magic still fading from it.

Instead, he concentrates on Magnus and his magic and puts out the thoughts and details of his surroundings, like being watched by over a thousand warlocks and their companions, all hidden with their faces hidden behind a variety of masks.

It’s daunting to be here, to be taking part in something that feels so old and sacred when Alec was supposed to be no more than chattel. Fodder for a war built on the blood of innocents that Alec’s own people started.  It feels wrong to be here so defenseless and yet know that Magnus’ magic will protect him better than any weapon.

—

Carefully, Magnus uses magic to take off Alexander’s ceremonial collar and he instead replaces it with a loop of pure magic that will slowly take on more and more power until the image of it will always become whatever Magnus wishes it to be.

For now, however, it is a tight loop of deep purple magic that pulses with Magnus’ magic and power in time to Alexander's every breath.

It’s a show of power to summon a single adamas arrow — one that Alexander gave to Magnus by his own hand — and hold it without harm. Alexander sucks in a startled breath — perhaps at the sight of one of his own arrows or that Magnus can hold it with ease — and Magnus can feel him quiver under Magnus’ palm.

“My protection is absolute. When you bleed it will be because I wish it, for no other is allowed to spill your blood.” Magnus uses the arrowhead to nick Alexander’s upper lip — just as he cut the lower with the stele — and then he leans forward to lick it off and suckle the cut until he earns a whine of pain.

“The flames of Edom will devour all before allowing anyone to touch you without my permission.” Magnus promises and his fingers dance with flames that brush harmlessly over Alexander’s neck — the shard of Magnus’ soul claiming Alexander in an undeniable way that will protect him from harm in Edom.

Alexander seems torn between leaning forward and stepping away and Magnus knows his boy better now than he did when they were wed. Alexander needs no leash as Magnus first thought, just a steady hand and Magnus’ voice.

The bonds between them are the only tether Magnus will ever need with Alexander.

“Sweetheart—” Magnus teases, his voice caressing Alexander with magic and he can see how his boy shudders at the sound and feel of it. He steps forward unconsciously, he's been instinctively drawn to Magnus from the very beginning and Magnus croons and reaches out. His palm blooms with hellfire before settling on Alexander’s hip and Magnus pulls him closer still.

“Should any look at you without being graced by my benevolence, their sight shall be consumed by my magic. A payment for stealing a glimpse of what is only mine to see.”

Magnus’ vows are instinctive and there is a primal surge of delight as he takes the ritual a step further, cursing any being who would dare look at Alexander’s uncovered face without his blessing.

It’s an old tradition.

Older still than the ritual Magnus is using and it’s something that has been out of style for over three centuries. Magnus still remembers the stories of how the legend of Medusa started. A warlock desperate to protect her gorgeous consort cursed her love with a vicious, loving protection.

Magnus knows now that Alexander expects to be a spectacle.

A disgraced nephilim in the eyes of his own people, traded away for a peace bought with his soul and virginity. Alexander expected to be paraded around as a mockery, a whipping boy for the clave to offer to the warlocks and it’s clear that’s what the clave told him he was.

But Alexander is not something to be gawked at.

He is not someone who Magnus will allow others to see, not to admire and certainly not to laugh over. Alexander is his consort and if that means that Magnus veils him in magic and curses all those who dare look upon him, then so be it.

[invisibleraven]

"Stop pretending that you care" sounds very Carrie-coded to me, so Carrie(/or &) anyone

"Carrie! Carrie this way please!"

Carrie held her hand up, as if that would magically stop the paps from taking her photo, from hounding her with questions, from being anywhere near her.

She knew this was the price of fame-everyone wanting a piece of you, but sometimes she just wanted to vanish off the face of the Earth, and just go back to being anonymous. Even if it was only for a second.

Finally she was in the hotel lobby, and even if the odd person there stared at her, it beat the overbearing presence of the vultures outside. She turned to her assistant Julie. "Can you check us in and get everything settled? I need a drink."

"Right away," Julie replied with anod, instructing the bellhops and valets to take the wealth of luggage towards the front desk. Julie was good at her job-that was half the reason Carrie hired her. Well that and they had been friends since childhood, meaning Julie was one of the few people Carrie trusted, and knew her as a person, not her Pink Candi persona.

"Glass of Manhattan please," she said as she sat at the bar, sliding over a large enough bill to cover the drink, plus a generous tip. She found servers were less likely to rat you out if you tipped well.

"Coming right up," the bartender replied, and soon enough the glass was in front of her, and a genuine smile offered to her as she nodded in thanks. "You need anything else, even if it's an open ear, just lemme know."

Carrie chuckled into her drink. "This doesn't look like that kind of bar."

The server shrugged. "Ain't nothing wrong with offering a bit of hospitality. Plus most people get chatty if they're liquored up enough, so the least I can do is listen."

Carrie hummed, taking another sip of her drink. Why not talk to this stranger though? Beat going to therapy like her dad constantly did, or fucking off to goodness knows where like her mom did. "I know I shouldn't complain. I have everything you could want but it's not..."

"What you thought it would be?" he offered.

"Exactly," she surmised. "There are times I just wanna be you know?"

"Totally," the server said, slicing up fruit for garnishes as he listened. "Even if you're doing what you love, it's still a job some days."

"Is this what you love?" Carrie asked. "Bartending and part time therapy?"

He snorted. "It's a living. But no, this is just a side hustle to pay off my loans. I do what I love when I'm not here slinging drinks."

"And what's that?" she asked, polishing off her drink and watching as he effortlessly made her another without her needing to ask.

"Photography," he replied.

Carrie's hackles rose at that-this hotel was well known for housing the rich and famous. What if he worked here so he could get a few snaps to sell later? "Like nature or weddings?"

"Sometimes," he replied. "Beats doing fashion shoots. But no, I mostly shoot magazines, celebrities and the like."

Carrie pushed her second drink away then, standing up. "Well that's just great. Enjoy your scoop."

"What?" he asked, looking confused. "What's going on now?"

"Stop pretending you care," she hissed. "Vulture."

"I am... so confused," he stated.

That's when Julie came in, and her face lit up as she spotted them. "Reggie!" she ran over, hugging him over the bar. "I hoped you'd be working here tonight"

"Ju Ju Bean!" he replied, his smile blooming. "Yeah, well when you told me when you'd be here, I asked for the shift. Figured you might have time to catch up."

"Always," she replied, and god Carrie ached to see how happy and smiley Julie was-a smile she thought was reserved for Carrie alone. "Oh, Carrie, this is Reggie. He and I went to college together, and he did his apprenticeship with my dad. Reggie, this is my boss and best friend, Carrie."

"We've met," Reggie replied, his smile turning more polite. "She seems to have the wrong idea about me."

Carrie looked sheepish as she shrunk under Julie's glare. "It's just... he said he did photography. Specifically celebrities and after the paps outside... I overreacted. Sorry."

Reggie relaxed at that. "No I get it-those idiots have caused more than enough trouble. I do more so album covers, stuff for interviews. Promo images, and gig shoots. Legit publications, not the Inquirer."

"He's actually doing the photos for your gig tomorrow," Julie added. "I was going to introduce you two over dinner this evening."

Carrie drooped at that. "And now I am doubly sorry."

Reggie waved her off. "No I seriously get it. My best friend Luke reacted the same way when I told him I wanted to get into the biz-he made me promise to stick to the light side of the force, even if the money is good for the paps. We're cool, and if you want someone else tomorrow, I won't hold a grudge."

"No, you've been nothing but kind, and I was reverting back to my high school mean girl persona," Carrie stated. "How about we start over? I'm Carrie."

"Reggie," he replied, shaking her offered hand. "Now, my shift is done, so how about dinner and we can discuss your vision for the shoot?"

"Only if you let me pay," Carrie offered.

"Well d'uh," Reggie replied, offering her and Julie his arms. "Now where are you two lovely ladies taking me tonight?"

Julie rolled her eyes fondly at him, but Carrie saw the way she leaned into him, the way she wanted Julie to lean into her, and understood a lot clearer why they had stopped here specifically.

But the way that Reggie looked at the both of them? The way he made them laugh and feel appreciated, valued, and completely normal for once? Carrie could work with that.

And even though the selfie she took of the three of them that night was no work of art, especially not with Reggie taking gorgeous shots of the three of them over the years. That first picture would always be her favourite, as it was the beginning of the rest of her life.

[silver-dragonborn]

I saw some hotd spoilers on TikTok and while I would normally feel ashamed for watching them, this show is such a fucking dumpster fire that I simply do not care anymore. With that being said, here are my thoughts. Out of respect, I will not post commentary in my tags.

-) Aemond telling Helaena to saddle up only for her to tell him to kindly fucking fuck off and coldly predict his future where he will die alone.

"B-but Helaena loves her brother!"

Correction. Loved. She loved Aemond until he killed Lucerys which set off a chain of events that got her own son killed in retaliation. I'm sorry, but if my asshole brother told me to fight for him after his decisions led to the gruesome death of one of my babies, I would spit in his face for the audacity.

"Will you burn me as you did Aegon?"

"That is a lie."

"I saw it."

Helaena was done playing around. No riddles. No musings. She was grieving and angry and lashing out at the jackass responsible. Helaena refuses to fight a losing battle and plus, she no longer trusts Aemond so why the fuck would she ride beside an emotional time bomb with a geriatric dragon that refuses to listen to him?

-) "It's all a story and you're but one part in it. You know your part." Gave me chills. Phia was SERVING in this episode and knowing what I know about Helaena and her ending, I'm praying we'll see more of her. Daemon's final vision in Harrenhal bore some fruit as I got to see a haunting glimpse of Daenerys and her dragons...Night King looked like a leathery Halloween costume from a general store...not my cup of tea.

-) Aemond throwing a hissyfit and putting his disgusting hands on Helaena to force her to burn Harrenhal with him was nothing new to me. You've seen how he treats members of his family...Helaena and Alicent are no different. Also, imagine being raised for YEARS to hate your sister and being trained to fight her only for your mom, the one responsible for your upbringing, deciding to throw in the towel and sue for peace. Yeah, I don't blame Aemond for feeling betrayed by Alicent who RAISED HIM TO HATE HIS SISTER.

-) That scene with Alicent and Rhaenyra...I'm sorry, but that was total bullshit and out of character. The fact that Rhaenyra was written out to be the disgruntled spouse listening to her wife's apologies was ridiculous. Rhaenicents will count this as a win, but to me, it's poorly written-fanfiction. Even when Alicent was "apologizing" and "baring her soul" to Rhaenyra she still justified her bullshit (go figure). Now, NOW, after humiliating Rhaenyra at her wedding, allowing a murderer to walk free, plotting against her, and TORTURING HER FOR YEARS, SHE WANTS TO RUN AWAY FROM IT ALL?? Lady, you sealed your family's fate the moment you wore that green dress. Alicent wants to flee from the problems that SHE created and I was fucking GOBSMACKED that she practically betrays her "favorite son" in favor of opening up the city to Rhaenyra without bloodshed. Kudos to Rhaenyra for sticking to her guns to cut off Aegon's head. I know anti-Rhaenyra stans will screech that this is proof she was always going to kill him and refuse to believe that Rhaenyra, having lost a son and a daughter, wants vengeance for her dead children...honestly, what do y'all expect??

-) I half-expected Aemond to fly over to Dragonstone, bend the knee to his sister, and hug it out. Y'know...like in every fix-it fanfic ever where Rhaenyra forgives those usurping murderous cunts and strives to be a better sister because it's all her fault that her siblings are SAD and not pure, sweet Alicent's fault for turning them against her in the first place.

-) We finally see Sheepstealer, but no scene of Rhaena claiming him and flying in the skies. Seriously, what the fuck? We get a pointless scene of Alicent treating with Rhaenyra on Dragonstone, but nothing for Rhaena? I swear, the writers add in these pointless scenes to avoid anything to do with the twins. No, we just see her staring bug-eyed at Sheepstealer while Hugh gets extra screen time with Vermithor.

-) I'd say the only scenes that stood out to me were Daemon bending the knee to Rhaenyra, Helaena's predictions, and Team Black gearing up for war.

-) Anyway, this episode was insane and not in a good way. The Rhaenicent agenda and the constant need to portray Alicent as this misunderstood angel who just wants her best friend back are dragging this show through the mud.

[emotionalcadaver]

Part 17: Not Yours

Fandom: Peaky Blinders

Pairing: Tommy Shelby x Grace Burgess x OC

Summary: John says something regarding Lucy’s relationship with Charlie that cuts deeply.

Word Count: 3,428 

Notes: I wrote this for @call-sign-shark’s 1k followers celebration. Congratulations, Shark! I decided to participate in the angel themed option, and I picked the dialogue prompt: "Don't listen to them" from this list. As usual you can read this as a standalone fic without reading the preceding parts if you prefer. There are some spoilers for previous parts, so if you want to go into the fics preceding this one totally blind, I suggest reading those first, but it’s by no means required to understand what’s going on here. All you need to know is that it takes place sometime between seasons 2 and 3, and that Tommy, Lucy, and Grace are in an established polyamorous relationship. Warnings for depictions of angst, polyamory, infertility, some irresponsible behavior when taking care of a baby (the baby is fine, though, don’t worry!), and insecurity.  

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She rushed down the hall, shoes clattering against the hardwood floor, bursting through the doors to the drawing room, following the high wails that were steadily increasing in volume. 

“Charlie!?”

The baby was sitting on a blanket in the middle of the room, his face contorted with terror as he cried his little heart out. Swooping into the room, she scooped him up, cradling the back of his head when she pulled his tiny body into her chest. He immediately nuzzled into her neck, still crying even as he clung to her.

“Sweet boy, sweet boy. It’s okay. I’ve got you,” she swayed them both gently from side to side. “Shush…it’s okay,” satisfied that he was safe once he started to settle, she looked around the room, brows furrowing.

John and Esme had come by to let their kids run off some of their energy by playing on the expansive grounds around Arrow House. She could hear their hoots and hollers filtering in through the window. Tommy had to go down to his office in Small Heath for something, and Grace was in London doing some wedding shopping. Lucy had some things she needed to get done, and had taken up John and Esme on their offer to babysit Charlie while she worked in her office. She thought it would be fine; they had about a thousand children so it wasn’t like she was worried they would drop the baby on his head or anything. Besides, it was only for an hour at most. 

And yet, looking around the room where she’d left them with Charlie, there was no John or Esme to be found. Her eyes narrowed. What the fuck? Didn’t they know better than to leave a baby alone like this? The least they could have done was put him in his crib in the nursery so he couldn’t get into trouble.  

Charlie’s cries had mostly subdued, resting his head on her shoulder with his chubby little arms still clinging to her.

“Where’d your aunt and uncle go, Charlie?” she asked, truly baffled. But steadily replacing that bafflement was a deep fury. What the fuck was wrong with them?

Still carrying Charlie, she began to walk towards the upstairs, adjusting the weight of him in her arms. 

“I know, sweetie,” she said when he sniffled into her shoulder. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have left you alone with them.”

A pit of guilt had opened up inside her. She should have known better than to trust them. 

It was just as she was rounding the corner to take Charlie back to the nursery that the door to one of the guest rooms flew open, John and Esme staggering out, giggling and readjusting their clothes. 

When they caught sight of her they froze, expressions turning sheepish. For a long moment, the three of them just stared at each other. 

“He was crying,” Lucy said finally.

“Shit,” John wiped a hand down his face, stifling a laugh. “Sorry. We didn’t hear.”

“Cleary,” she knew that she would be better served to just bite her tongue and tell Tommy about what happened later and let him deal with it, but she was too angry. “You should have said if it was such an inconvenience to watch him. I could have just put him in his bassinet in my office.”

“It’s no inconvenience–”

“No?” she raised an eyebrow. John rolled his eyes.

“Look, the kid fell asleep. Esme and I haven’t had a moment alone in fuck knows how long. We figured we’d just step away for a few moments while he slept and everything would be fine–”

Poor Charlie. He must have woken up laying on that blanket in the big drawing room all by himself and gotten scared. Lucy tightened her arms around him protectively. 

“Well then you should have called a maid or the nanny to come watch him. You can’t just leave a baby alone like that! He could have gotten hurt!”

“Oh, come on, Luce, he can barely even crawl yet, he would’ve been fine–” John started.

“We know a hell of a lot more about raising kids than you,” Esme ground out. Lucy felt her hackles raise at the underlying meaning.

“Excuse me?”

Esme opened her mouth, but John interjected before she could say anymore. 

“Look,” he pinched his brow. “Fine. It was a mistake, and we’re sorry,” he gave Esme a little nudge. “Aren’t we, Esme?”

“Mm,” was all she said, still glaring at Lucy. 

“But he’s fine,” John gestured to where Charlie was settled comfortably in Lucy’s arms. “No harm done. So…”

Lucy raised an eyebrow. “So…?” she quoted back, though she had a pretty good idea of what John was going to ask of her next. 

He sighed. “So, if you could just maybe not mention any of this to Tommy…”

Lucy cocked her head. “I think that Tommy has a right to know what happens in his own household, don’t you? Especially if it has to do with his child.”

John’s face twitched. He’d always had a short fuse. But at least Lucy was fairly confident he wouldn’t try anything too rash so long as she had the baby in her arms. 

“Would it kill you to not be a fucking snitch, just once in your life!?” he snapped. “You act all shocked and hurt that none of us can fucking stand you, but have never stopped to consider that maybe it’s because we know everything we do or say around you gets back to him?”

“I do my job, John. Just like you do yours.”

Esme scoffed. “His little spy. Even amongst his own family members,” she hissed a curse in Shelta and spat at her feet. Shaking her head, Lucy shouldered past them. She wasn’t going to stand around and listen to this. 

“I’m not going to lie to Tommy when he asks me how things went today just so you two can avoid a scolding.” she said over her shoulder.

“Why do you even care so much!?” John exploded, shouting at her as she continued to walk down the hallway. “He’s not even your kid!”

Lucy froze, shoes skidding to a stop against the soft rug. She was glad that her back was turned, so John couldn’t see her face when the words punched a hole in her heart. 

Swallowing hard and carefully schooling her features into an expression that hopefully hid just how heartbroken the statement had left her, she turned around, taking a few steps back towards them.

“Get out of my house.”

John and Esme both looked momentarily taken aback by the dark tone in her voice.

“It’s not your house,” John tried to argue.

“Oh, okay. Let’s wait for Tommy or Grace to come home and see how they feel about that sentiment.”

Their jaws clenched, but they both seemed to recognize that was not a fight they particularly wanted to engage in; especially considering they were in enough trouble already. John wiped at his nose, then took Esme’s hand.

“Come on, Esme,” he led her with booming steps towards the stairs. Lucy watched them until they had disappeared out of sight, squeezing Charlie a little tighter to her. The moment they were gone, she felt her features crumple slightly, breaths shaky as she turned back around to head towards the nursery. As if sensing she was distressed, Charlie pulled back from where he’d been resting his head on her shoulder to look at her. 

“I’m okay, honey,” she said, shouldering open the door to the nursery. Instead of taking him to the crib, she sat down in the rocking chair with him in her lap. Charlie craned his head up to look at her curiously, the chair shifting back and forth as she rocked them mindlessly. Breaths still shuttering in her chest with the effort it was taking her not to cry, Lucy smoothed down Charlie’s hair with her palm, kissing the top of his head.

She loved Charlie with all her heart. And Tommy and Grace had made herculean efforts to ensure she never felt left out in raising him, always insisting that Charlie was just as much hers as he was theirs. 

They’d made even more of an effort on emphasizing that fact ever since she’d finally admitted to them her secret regarding her inability to have her own biological children. 

But despite their efforts, fear still weighed heavily inside her chest. Fear of what would happen when Charlie got old enough to begin asking questions about the nature of her relationship with his parents. And that, maybe, even after he knew the truth, he wouldn’t understand. He could even come to the conclusion that he didn’t want his parents being with her at all. 

They hadn’t really decided how much they were going to tell him when he got older. Of course there was the concern that when he was young he might not fully understand the importance of discretion in the whole arrangement. But the idea of him not knowing, and growing up thinking that either of his parents were being unfaithful to each other with her, and inevitably resenting her for it, made her want to cry. 

“Da!” Charlie squawked.

“I know,” she stroked his soft hair. “Daddy’ll be home soon,” she soothed.

Charlie cuddled back against her chest, yawning a little. Lucy sighed, stroking his back. 

“I hope you’ll still love me this much when you’re older, kiddo,” she whispered. 

“He’s not even your kid!” John’s voice echoed in her head, and her bottom lip trembled.

It always stung to be reminded that outside of Tommy and Grace, no one would ever really see her as Charlie’s parent. While most of the family knew about the arrangement between her, Grace, and Tommy, many of them did not approve of or even accept it. And she knew that quite a few of them also viewed her extensive involvement in Charlie’s upbringing as her pushing herself into a position where she didn’t belong.   

God, the possibility that Charlie himself might someday feel that same way…

A shuddering sound left her lips, breaths stuttering as she tried hard not to cry. Suddenly unable to sit still, she picked Charlie back up and stood, going to the window.  

She had never thought of Charlie as anything other than her baby. 

And given what the doctors had told her, he–and any other children Tommy and Grace might have–was the only baby she would ever have.  

That was alright. She’d mostly made peace with that fact, small bouts of sadness or insecurity aside, and she loved Charlie so much; he would always be enough for her. 

He’s not even your kid.

But the idea, that nagging, insistent feeling, that someday Charlie might say something to the exact same effect to her, was more than enough to break her heart.  

Hot tears finally slid down her cheeks, a small sob spasming in her chest. Charlie, staring up at her, reached up, patting at her wet face clumsily with one of his tiny hands. 

“Mama,” he said.

“Mama will be back soon, too, sweetie,” her voice was heavy with tears. 

“Mama!” he insisted, patting her face again.  

Lucy looked down at him in puzzlement, lips parting when she finally understood. “Oh, no, honey…I’m not your mama.”

“Mama,” Charlie said once more, stubbornly, and she sighed. He really was his father’s child. 

“It’s just ‘Lucy,’ baby,” she tried to explain. She didn’t really have an official title for him to call her by. Any form of ‘mother’ just felt like it would confuse the poor boy, but she wasn’t particularly fond of variations like ‘Aunt Lucy’ either. She had come more or less to the conclusion that she would just be ‘Lucy’ to him almost without even realizing it.

“Mama!” Charlie’s hand tried to again pat at her damp cheek, though it was more like he was gently smacking her with it thanks to his lack of coordination. She sputtered out a sound that was half a laugh, slightly tipping her face away from him after he almost poked her in the eye. 

Adjusting him so he was propped up on her hip, she leaned her head against the top of his, closing her eyes while swaying them back and forth. A moment later, Charlie put his little arms on each of her shoulders in what could only be considered a hug, and she nearly burst into another round of tears over how heartwarming it was.

Sometimes she swore that the kid understood far more of what was actually going on with the adults around him than they thought.  

She didn’t think she stood there for very long, though she couldn’t be entirely sure, before she heard the creak of shoes on the floorboards behind her.

“There you are,” Tommy said, striding across the room before she really had time to process that he was there, pecking a kiss to her lips and stroking a gentle hand over Charlie’s head. He frowned when he pulled back and got a good look at her face. Her eyes were probably still red from crying. “What’s wrong?”

“Oh, um…”

“Da!” Charlie interrupted her, clearly ecstatic to see his father, pulling both of their attentions to him. 

“You wanna go to your Daddy, Charlie?” Lucy asked. “Give my arms a break before they get too sore? You’re getting heavy, kiddo.”

Tommy chuckled, taking Charlie from her with a grin, holding the baby close to him with Charlie’s head tucked securely on his shoulder. Once he was situated, he turned back to Lucy, eyebrow raised questioningly. She shook her head.

“I’m fine.”

The look in his eyes said that he didn’t believe her. “I noticed John, Esme, and the kids are gone,” he prompted. 

“Yeah, I, um,” she cleared her throat. “I kinda threw them out.”

“Why?” he tilted his head curiously. 

“Because they offered to watch Charlie while the kids were playing outside so I could get some work done. And then I heard him crying later while I was in my office and I found him lying on a blanket in the drawing room wailing by himself.”

Tommy’s brows pulled together. “They just left him alone?”

“Apparently he fell asleep, and they thought it would be acceptable to go fuck in one of the spare rooms,” she reached out to stroke Charlie’s back. “He’s okay,” retracting her hand, she ran it through her tangled curls. “I shouldn’t have left him alone with them.”

“John and Esme know better than that,” Tommy growled, and from the far-off, calculating look in his eyes, she could tell that both his brother and sister-in-law were in for a proper scolding the next time he saw them. His gaze snapped back to her. “What else happened?”

She shook her head. “That’s it.”

One arm hooked securely around Charlie, he reached out the other to cup her cheek, thumb stroking the slightly puffy skin under one of her eyes.

“You’ve been crying.”

“I’m okay.”

His eyes narrowed, immediately closing in on what must have happened. “What did John say?”

“It’s not that big of a deal, Tommy…”

He gave her a stern look and she sighed, breaking eye contact with him to instead adjust the collar on Charlie’s shirt. “Just some shit about Charlie not really being my kid.”

Tommy was quiet for a long moment. “What?” he finally said, voice a low, dangerous growl. When she looked back up it was to find that his eyes had hardened, jaw tensing. 

“Yeah, um,” she coughed. And then, because she figured if she was already going to do the equivalent of throwing John into a pit with an angry wolf, she might as well tell the entire story, she added, “he also tried to say that this wasn’t my house…”

“I’m gonna kill him,” the absolute seriousness with which it was said had a weak smile pulling at the corners of her lips. Tommy shook his head, turning his furious eyes towards the window like he could somehow beam his anger and disappointment at John just by staring in the general direction of his house. “Fucking John…” he hissed under his breath.

“Yeah,” wrapping her arms around herself, she looked down at the floor. Tommy’s head snapped around to her.

“Hey,” adjusting Charlie in his arms, he reached out and cupped her face again, tilting her head up and resting his forehead against hers. “He’s wrong, eh? John’s an idiot; don’t listen to a word he says.”

Lucy let out a small laugh, a hand coming to rest on Tommy’s chest. “It’s what they’re all thinking, though,” she peered up at him, lip caught between her teeth.

Tommy shook his head. “Don’t listen to them,” his nose brushed against hers. “They don’t know what the fuck they’re talking about,” he whispered huskily, and Lucy shivered, letting him crowd in closer to her, mouth brushing over hers sensually. “You’re his mother,” he said after he pulled back. “Both me and Grace say so.”

Charlie made a squealing noise, reaching his little fists for Lucy’s hair. Tommy chuckled.

“See? Charlie does too.” 

Lucy sniffled, nodding and letting him draw her into the circle of his arm, so that he was holding both her and his son to his chest. 

“We love you,” Tommy said into her hair.

“Love you too,” she mumbled. Charlie tried to grab her hair again, catching a fistful of it.

“No tugging, son,” Tommy spoke gently, carefully untangling the curls from Charlie’s fingers before he could begin yanking on it. “Lucy doesn’t like that.”

Charlie pouted, but relented, yawning and resting his head on his father’s chest. 

“I’ll talk to John,” Tommy told her. 

“You gonna yell at him?”

“Oh, yeah.”

She tried not to smile at the idea and thoroughly failed. He never had once failed to defend her to his family whenever they stepped out of line. She couldn’t begin to tell him just how much that meant to her. “Thanks.”

He pecked her forehead “Of course.”

The door opened with a soft creak, approaching heels clicking on the floor. “Why, hello you three,” Grace smiled brightly when she took in the sight of her two lovers and her baby embracing. She whisked forward to give both Lucy and Tommy quick greeting pecks on the lips before kissing Charlie on the cheek. He made a happy cooing noise at the presence of his mother before snuggling closer to Tommy. 

“I think he’s about ready to go down,” Tommy commented, hoisting the baby a little more firmly up on his shoulder.

“Can I take him?” Lucy asked suddenly. Tommy shot her a look, smile pulling at his lips. 

“Sure,” he handed Charlie over to her with zero hesitation, the baby, already half asleep, nestled his head in the crook of her neck with no complaint, heavy in her arms. Grace pulled her eyes away from Charlie to look at her, brows furrowing. 

“Did something happen?” she asked. 

“John’s been being an ass,” Tommy said, wrapping an arm around Grace’s shoulders and kissing the top of her head. She rested her head on his shoulder. “I’ll take care of it.”

“How was the shopping?” Lucy asked, wanting desperately to change the conversation, though she could already tell from the look on Grace’s face that she would be wanting more details later. 

“Oh, very successful. I got the order in for those centerpieces we agreed on.”

“That’s good,” Lucy nodded, carrying Charlie over to the crib. “I love you,” she whispered into the baby’s ear. He cooed softly when she cradled him carefully as she put him down. 

“Mary said dinner is almost ready; we should head down,” Grace said, her and Tommy moving to join Lucy at the crib, the three of them crowded together around it. She kissed Lucy’s temple. “And then you can tell me all about what exactly John did.” 

“Okay,” Lucy breathed out, still staring down into the crib, where Charlie was looking up at her sleepily. Most of the inhabitants of Small Heath, and even many of the Shelbys, had always looked at her like she was a demon. Some monster that had crawled out of the bowels of hell to terrorize them all. But Charlie looked up at her not just with the unquestioning love that a baby had for its parents, but with complete and absolute trust. Like she was his guardian angel. 

She hoped, probably in vain, that he would always look at her like that.

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Thank you for reading! Please consider leaving a comment, reblog, or like. I always appreciate feedback and love getting the opportunity to interact with you and hear your thoughts!

[shioritsumi]

More shit on Shen Tianyu:

-Shang Qingshui and Shen Tianyu have been friends since they were kids, on the grounds of them both being insufferable smart-asses at the time. Only Tianyu's family got the nicest side of him, everyone else got the authoritative snark. They became friend when classmates were complaining to Tianyu about Qingshui being mean and Tianyu just bullied him back. They exchanged insults for ten minutes and for a couple of 8-year olds, that's the equivalent of forming a lifelong friendship vow, practically marriage.

-Shang Qingshui and Shen Tianyu were roommates in college and totally dated at the time. They broke up and got back together no less than five times before Tianyu finally met Lianhua and actually married her. Qingshui was at their wedding and everything. (Lianhua was genuinely concerned for a while he might try to steal her husband. He found the concept hilarious bc why the fuck would he steal Shen Tianyu of all people she's funny.)

-Shang Qingshui is part of why Shen Tianyu got suspended from his job during his breakdown. He attempted their usual office banter, and when Tianyu didn't respond accordingly he got worse and worse until Tianyu snapped and lashed out at him. They've sort of smoothed it over since, but Qingshui isn't the sort of person who apologizes so they kind of just act like it never happened. No, no one understands their friendship. Not even them.

-"are you happy or sad there's no Mobei-jun here?" Shang Qingshui is insulted by both the assumption he'd WANT to see Mobei-jun after he literally was killed by the man in his previous life AND the assumption that there isn't anyone like Mobei-jun in their world at all. (The CEO of a rival company bears a striking resemblance to Mobei-jun and for his part Qingshui is actively trying to stay off his radar, he is NEVER getting put back in the demon spy position ever again and he is never providing his neck for anyone even VAGUELY resembling Mobei-jun.)

-Shen Tianyu used to be involved in martial arts when he was much younger, but eventually quit. He insists it's because he needed the extra time to study for his cram school and prep school and whatnot. Actually he has a highly competitive nature and he accidentally hurt some other kids in class and he was told he could either go to counselling to control his temper when dealing with students at a lower level than him, or he could just...quit. He quit.

-When he does get allowed back to work again, Tianyu's put in charge of training new employees and they start to call him Shizun bc they hear Bingge calling him that and think it fits.

-If they ever manage to meet SQQ and Binghe again, Bingge would definitely try to brag about how he's totally met his perfect shizun and SQQ can't even compare! Then Tianyu opens his mouth and reveals not only is their relationship not some perfect cutesy "housewife Bingge" and "gracious shizun" marriage, Bingge has to keep lecturing Tianyu on self-destructive habits and Tianyu keeps having to remind Bingge to try to be more chill about literally everything.

-Bingge has cut down on most of Tianyu's drinking and self-destructive behavior and despite being 30+, Tianyu has been an absolute BABY about the whole thing. He's allowed to only hold sharp objects when he's cooking, which he doesn't do often anymore because Bingge does that now. Bingge has also taken custody of all of Tianyu's lighters for the same reason as the knives. ("I'd light a lovely scented candle for you, but SOMEONE doesn't trust me with lighters anymore!" "I saw you get drunk and try to burn your tongue once, you're never getting them back.")

-Shen Jiuyuan may secretly be the OG SQQ transmigrated back into the modern world as a small child. Far as everyone knows, Jiuyuan has turned rather anti-social and awkward lately, but this has been attributed his parents' divorce and how ugly their relationship got afterwards. For his part, Shen Tianyu ADORES his son and dotes on him endlessly while Bai Lianhua seems to view her son as means to an end at this point.

What Tianyu can't fully understand is why his young son is so nervous around his new boyfriend Bingge. Is he scared bc Bingge is big and muscular and also new? Kids can be scared when new people come into their parents' lives, right? He's pretty sure the counsellor mentioned that, so as long as he reassures Jiuyuan that Bingge isn't going to replace him and he's still going to have time for him, it'll be okay, right?

Meanwhile from Jiuyuan's perspective: that is LUO BINGHE. His op disciple, the spirit of karmic vengeance, the man who took his arms and legs and sworn brother and even his LIFE and now he's the doting protective boyfriend to Jiuyuan's brand new dad???? What the fuck?

-there's a lot of OG people from PIDW around Shen Tianyu and for all his memorization of the story, Tianyu appears to be the only one who should notice who hasn't. (the rival CEO who looks like Mobei-jun may in fact actually BE the OG Mobei-jun, who knows.)

[hello-nichya-here]

No, the HIMYM finale is not secretly genius, stop lying to yourselves

The series finale of How I Met Your Mother, with Robin divorcing Barney and then getting together with Ted, a widower, years later could have been great. Yes, I'm serious.

Two people that were NOT soulmates and did NOT work out as couple when they were in their 20s met their true soulmates but life made them split up, and then they got a second chance of happiness with each other because, despite not being a perfect match they were at a point where they could make it work? Could totally work as a "bittersweet" ending. It's not "happily ever after" but it still finding happiness after the tragedy that stole their actual happily ever after, which is a valid, totally compelling story to tell.

But the writers completely destroyed any chance of it working as a satisfying story because the ending simply doesn't work as a twist and foreshadowing can't compete with consistent characterization.

The finale would only ever work if we had gotten to see the years of character development that were supposed to lead up to it. We'd have to SEE Barney and Robin's marriage deteriorating. We'd have too SEE Tracy's struggle with her illness and then Ted's years of grief. We'd have to SEE Ted and Robin slowly reconnecting and realizing that they've changed so much that can actually be a decent couple now - and more importantly, we have to see them CHANGE IN A WAY THAT MAKES THEM COMPATIBLE, NOT SIMPLY REVERSING THEM BACK TO HOW THEY WERE IN THE PILOT EPISODE BECAUSE THEY WERE ALREADY INCOMPATIBLE BACK THEN!

The show spent 98% of it's time building up to the "red-herring" of a Barney/Robin & Ted/Tracy endgame, with only the ocasional hints that this wasn't actually going to happen. It spent 9 fucking years, 9 seasons of 20+ episodes, building up to it this false endgame. Then suddenly the finale they try to give us SIXTEEN YEARS IN 40 MINUTES, expecting the audience the do the writer's jobs for them and fill in the blanks.

If they had given us the "fake ending" in the middle of the show, then spent the following seasons building up to the true ending, the finale wouldn't have been hated. Sure, no one would be surprised by the events in it, but anyone who didn't want Ted and Robin together would have bailed on the series a long time ago anyway.

And that's why they didn't do it. Because they knew most people didn't want these two to be endgame, LOVED Barney's growth as a character, and were not only eagerly waiting to meet Tracy but were also blown away by how she managed to be even better than we imagined. They wanted to have it both ways: give the audience what they wanted AND say "Sorry, this is our story, if you don't like it you don't have to watch it." It's cowardly, pathetic and a deep betrayal of the audience's trust, because people CAN accept not being given what they wanted - but they don't accept being lied to.

We never saw Barney be frustrated by Robin's work or by constant traveling before the finale - he's the "challenge accepted" guy, for fuck's sake, he used to go random trips just for the sake of having an adventure with his friends - thefore we don't believe that he is miserable enough that he'd want to end their marriage.

You can't show us Robin repeatedly choosing Barney over Ted, give us an insane scene of her covering Ted's face during sex to pretend she's sleeping with someone else, having her react to what she thinks is a proposal with 'You can't do this to me!", and even saying, to his face, that she doesn't love him, and then pretend that she totally still had feelings for him this entire time.

Even Ted pointed out, during this wedding to Stella, that Robin isn't hoping he'll remain single because she genuinely wants him, but because she's just afraid of being alone. C&C cannot convince general audiences, or critics, that she loves this man after they literally described the show as "The story of man that is in love with a woman, and she doesn't want that."

They can't tell me Ted genuinely loved Robin when he was constantly irritated by everything that makes her who she is: the fact that she's career-driven, always takes charge of everything, doesn't want kids, likes to travel around because she wants life to be an adventure, doesn't seem to believe in fate or soulmates, is a gun enthusiast, etc. They can't tell me they'd make it work when that's still who Robin is a person and Ted would still be irritated by it.

They DEFINITIVELY cannot convince me that him being hung up on her for so long means anything when he meets a new potential "soulamte" every other week, and will ALSO fall back in love with multiple exes the second he runs into them again, or so much as thinks back to the good old times.

And they absolutely cannot fucking tell me that he'd still be hung up on her after 25 fucking years, after he met his actual soulmate - unless they want me to believe the woman that was basically born from his rib is not his soulmate, which I call bullshit on.

And no, finale defenders, you cannot make this an inspirational "He found happiness with an old flame after his true love passed away because life is messy like that" when the show itself said, all the way back in season two "If Ted and Robin got married, they'd inevitably divorce, handle terribly, and screw up any kids they had."

Because yes, that's a thing that happens. When Robin meets Ted's parents, there's a whole misunderstanding about the dad supposedly cheating on the mom - and then we discover that actually they've been divorced FOR A LONG TIME, and just never told their kids because REASONS. Ted is even outraged that "Is this what passes for communication in this family?" More importantly, he and Robin, who are wearing the same colors as his parents, are shocked as they realize that the reasons for their divorce were the same reasons that made Robin not want to want Ted - the same reasons that would make them break up episodes later.

The writting is on the wall here. Ted and Robin will inevitably split up, and his kids will resent them both for getting them caught in the crossfire. Ted is already taking a page from his parents' book on How To Suck At Communicating Like A Normal Person by claiming he's gonna tell a story about their mother, only to then be like "Actually, this about how I love someone else and want to date her now."

"Oh, you just don't get it! The show was never about the Yellow Umbrella (Tracy)! It was about the Blue French Horn (Robin)!"

Yeah. It was about Robin. About how she's completely wrong for Ted and how they could never be happy together. About how he needs to let go of this obsession before it ruins his life and his relationship with everyone else that he is hurting during his attempts of getting with her: Victoria, Barney, Tracy, his children, and even Robin herself.

This is not a bittersweet ending. This is not a happy ending. This is two delusional writers ACCIDENTALLY giving their characters the most miserable endgame possible, and being convinced that they're giving us a fairy-tale ending - because yeah, that's what they thought. They weren't even aiming for bittersweet. They were never aiming for "Tragedy happens, but life goes on and you can still find happiness in it." They thought that Robin and Ted being so distraught by their awful lives that they convince themselves they were meant to be, and then go on to ruin their already shiity lives even more, was the most perfect happily ever after anyone could ask for.

The finale COULD have been great. Instead it was the worst thing imaginable, and the very fact that people can only try to defend it by WILDLY misterpreting what the writers wanted them to take from it is proof of how poorly thought out and written it was.

No one likes it for what it is, they like it for what they PRETEND it is. That simple fact is more insulting to this ending than anything I or anyone else could possibly say.

[my-dark-lord]

About the Vox/Velvette/Valentino ask (sorry, I accidentally sent it before I could include more prompts) this prompt I found on your blog is so weirdly in Helluva's voice?

“Kiss me.” “Oh, fucking gladly.” 

Another thing is if you have any headcannons/opinions/theories about how the three of them met? Because Velvette is the newest V, I assumed she was recruited by the others, but how? Do you think she was already an overlord or did she become one only after joining them? Same with Vox and Valentino: were they separately overlords before forming an alliance or did one recruit the other? And if so, did Vox maybe recruit Val to make porn for his media thing, or did Val recruit Vox to distrubute his porn in some way and one helped the other rise to overlord status?

Anyways, feel free to respond to any of these or none of these questions! Hope your day is going well!

Hazbin Hotel Headcanon Requests - Accepting!

First Part Of This Ask

You're okay! I don't mind at all answering more than one ask for people as long as the asks aren't just reworded repeats of the same thing! You're totally fine, Nonny, no worries.

OH Yes, I can see this for any combination of them, honestly, but my first thought will always be VoxVal. The more I think about it, I'd like to write this with VoxVel, too, because I can hear "Oh, fucking gladly." in Christian Borle's voice for sure.

Oh! I do have some ideas for how they met for sure! I write it in a very particular way.

Valentino and Vox met when Valentino got married to another Overlord (an OC of mine). They were somewhat familiar with each other as Ostello sang under a music label owned by Vox, and Vox was at the wedding. Valentino eventually black widowed his husband with a holy spearhead and three other Overlords before he went for Vox, who managed to plow him so good that it saved his life. They became somewhat obsessed with each other after that. Valentino is a venomous species of moth and his venom is highly addictive, and it was the most intense sexual experience either of them had ever had.

Valentino had been building his empire before he killed Ostello and managed to obtain Ostello's territory and those around it to expand it into a huge section of the Pentagram. He and Vox formed an alliance after they became regulars in each other's lives, sharing both of their territories. Val already had his porn business and Vox had the means to distribute to a wider audience, so they worked together on those kinds of deals to really make a name for Valentino (and his talent).

While I have started enjoying the headcanon that Velvette is Carmilla's daughter, I haven't fully figured out how I want this version of her to join them.

I have thought out, and written about, her joining them after falling from Earth, however. She crashed into the ground right in front of Vox and Val, who were on a walk. The crater she created was massive and so Valentino decided to simply scoop her up and take her home. She was powerful enough to kick his ass, and he and Vox decided to recruit her on the spot. After earning her trust, they were tight as ever.

[all-pacas]

i’d really love to see a fully fledged fix it where you work out how you think it should’ve gone, with or without the divorce

[Referencing Cameron/Chase] So, here's the thing: I am not sure it can be fixed. I've been trying to think of ways to fix the divorce, and frankly, I don't think it's possible. Once the two of them split up? It's over. I don't even think it matters if Dibala exists or not; if they split up for another reason, I just don't think they'd get back together.

On Chase's end, we know the divorce fucked him up. Hell, the relationship kind of seems to have fucked with him; it's true he has more of a reason to look back cynically when it's over, but him hoping Cameron never loved him? Mustering evidence? Would he trust her again? Would he want her back? I'm not sure. Chase already went through this once, with his father: loving someone who abandons you and doesn't care. The first time, he closed himself off; after Cameron, he doesn't emotionally attach to anyone again. (Except the S8 nun, which was really much more of a "I almost died" desperation rebound.) I think even if Cameron showed up on his door begging for another chance, he wouldn't go for it. Been there, done that, wrote a narrative where she never cared and so he didn't either.

Cameron is… harder, because I think a lot of how the breakup happened was out of character. But she has a well established pattern of running away from her trauma, starting over. To go back to Princeton would be backsliding, or making a mistake, in her mind. Even if she wanted to (and I do think she would have wanted to; Cameron doesn't like to give up on things. It doesn't even matter if she loved Chase or not, although I believe she did. I think she'd honestly want to keep trying just out of… spite, almost. Stubbornness. Not flee and never once look back. The only way I can handwave her exit from the show is by saying she knows that about herself, and couldn't allow herself to do so — like quitting cold turkey. She knows she'd fall right back into the marriage, like it or not, if she stayed.)

That said, I don't think they're necessarily doomed in every reality or anything. I can imagine a world where they never divorced and were perfectly happy together, honestly. We can and should joke about how bad House MD is at writing and showing romance, and they certainly didn't have a great showing, but just looking at who they are? On paper, they seem like they could be good together.

Chase is cynical and apathetic but also cares a lot; we joke about how fucking needy he is but honestly? Cameron could be such a good girlfriend. You know she decorates the house for the holidays and he eats it up; he seems like he'd do great with domesticity and that sort of overwhelming cuddliness. And frankly, he'd enjoy getting bossed around, having someone who cares enough to boss him around, push him out of his laziness and apathy.

At the same time, though, Cameron is kind of… Foreman calls her anal. Type A. She needs to always be in control to feel safe, but that's actually not healthy. Chase is much more easy going, and he's totally fine with her being in charge of their relationship — but, very importantly: he's not actually a doormat. He has no issue pushing back against her. It's true he let the spare drawer issue lie for too long, but when she was avoiding his proposal? He established boundaries and fucking enforced them (by dumping her). With the sperm debacle? Same thing: he told her he was uncomfortable marrying her when she had doubts, and called off the wedding. Even in the messy FWB stage, he calls her out when he feels like he needs to. And I think that's good. Cameron is absolutely mostly in charge, the dominant one, and they're both happy with it. But Chase isn't passive or unwilling to push back. Nor is he mean about it. Where Foreman tends to push against Cameron by implying (or…saying) she's dumb and naive, Chase is honestly pretty nice to her. Even when he's upset, he never insults her or looks down on her. Even when they're having it out as they divorce, and he accuses her of never loving him, he stops to hug her when she cries.

They actually get along really well. Chase is the one of the OG team (counting House, Wilson, and Cuddy) who always got along with Cameron best. They have moments of disagreement of bickering here and there, but where there are episodes of Cameron feuding with Wilson or Foreman, or House, she and Chase tend to agree and get along. Part of this is undoubtedly because Chase is more passive and harder to pick a fight with. Once they start dating, they spend most of their time together, just hanging out. They like one another. There's probably a reason, besides Chase just being a huge dumb whore, that Cameron picked him to hook up with or for FWB: that reason not being deep secret love, but because they get along. If S2 Cameron considered Foreman a friend, she absolutely also considered Chase one, you know?

They apparently want similar things in life: they move in together, get married, and, if Chase's lines in Both Sides Now are an indication, they've talked about and maybe planned on having kids. Maybe they're not true passionate soulmates or whatever, but I think if nothing had gotten in the way, they probably would have been perfectly happy together. Maybe gotten an amicable divorce fifteen or twenty years later, when the kids were grown.

But once they separate? It's over.

[spillthebea]

🍬, 🍄 and tell me one controversial and unusual headcanon about Lily (I demand it!!)

🍬 ⇢ post an unpopular opinion about a popular fandom character

about lily they asked sooo here we go

i am not sure if controversial but i think lily would have totally f destroyed muggle-style snape and peter if ever gotten the chance AND petunia for what they did to her family. just imagine your husband's best friend betraying you after years of friendship for what? BECAUSE COWARDICE? like nuh uh man, you're getting suffocating by lily's hands and the shape of her wedding ring is gonna be imprinted around your shitty neck for the rest of your afterlife; just imagine your ex-best friend you give chances and excuses for life until you couldn't anymore just became a loyal member (so f loyal and into the shit he had private meetings with Lord f Voldemort) and gives the crucial information that makes the Dark Lord haunts you and your family down and instead of saying "oh shit i fucked up", he begs the dark bitch to let you live and kill your husband and your son... NUH UH, Lily would have tackled Snape the SECOND he was into sight. And the guilt she must have felt in the afterlife because that was her Severus, her friend who helped her discover magic was not that you were insane... OMG JILY BEING SO FULL OF GUILT BECAUSE THEY TRUSTED THE WRONG PEOPLE (james with peter and lily with snape) BUT OKAY, THOSE WERE FRIENDS BUT YOUR OWN F SISTER?! NUUUH UHHH lily is getting down there with a metal baseball bat

bonus: i know harry said james would have not wanted for peter to get killed like that in the Shack but harry didn't f know his dad, I DO! JAMES HEXED PEOPLE JUST FOR THE FUN OF IT (he matured YES I KNOW AND I LOVE HIM AND HE BECAME SUCH A GOOD PERSON WHO F DIED AS A HERO, READY TO F FIGTH VOLDY WITH HIS HANDS JUST TO GIVE LILY AND HARRY TWO SECONDS MORE TO RUN! THAT'S MY MAN!) and after knowing peter had not only betrayed him, but also let sirius go in azkaban as jily's traitor and killer?! NUUUH UH MY MAN WAS THERE SPIRITUALLY WITH WOLFSTAR CHEERING THEM ON

peter, one of his best friends, betrays him, the love of his life dies, JAMES HIMSELF dies and their beautiful son becomes an orphan and gets abused just like sirius (J's f brother!!) and james is not there to protect him like he did with sirius and everything because peter was a f coward. James, who had old parents who surely had some issues in playing with him bc of their age, had wished to have more than one kids so they will have each other and to make kids at a young age so he will have all the time to play with them and teaching quidditch and telling stories of pranks and grow old with lily, admiring the red becoming white, had gotten none of it bc of *ihnales deeply* FUCKING SCABBBBBBBBERS!

so i know jily is that icons meme of "go mass murder people my love, i hold your flower"

(that was intense, i have too many jily feelings and i oop-)

🍄 ⇢ share a head canon for one of your favourite ships or pairings

... blank mind AHH!

ehm... (NOT A SHIP OFC!)

i love the idea of walburga letting herself go after sirius runs away. She sleeps in his room, and sits in his room and just exists in his room and wasn't there to tell regulus not to accept the Death Mark bc she was not there mentally. I think she is a mother (NOT A MUM! differences are there) who thought she was doing everything right following how her parents taught her aka family comes first, they are no individuals in that house, but she understands too late how by doing so she lost her first child, her Sirius. I think she loved Regulus but not enough to care about him after Sirius was gone because (in my mind) Sirius was Walurga's child and Regulus was Orion's child BUT! in orion's head Sirius too was his child so Reggie was not the first priority of both of his parents even tho (in my head, again) Reggie and Orion are as similar as Sirius and Walburga are to each other and that's the problem. Orion (FOLLOWING MY CHARACTERISATION) sees too much of himself in Regulus and wishes to have been more like Sirius and Walburga knows Reg is easier to control and order around but he does not have her spark, he is too similar to orion AGAIN and sirius never understood that he was their parents' fav child thinking only that regulus was so f perfect and quiet aka the perfect son and heir for a family like the Blacks.

... me always going back to the black family LOL

[not-quitenormal]

...But if I had to indulge my feelings for a bit. If I had to react at all to what Lore told me.

It's absolute fucking shock.

She said that she realized after Devon's and my wedding that "things between us weren't going to work out" so she panicked and broke up with me to save her own marriage. I asked for clarification, "Things between you and me wouldn't work out, right?"

"No. Between me and [wife's name]."

"...Oh," was how I responded. And then we moved forward in the conversation.

But she said that she loved me. She was happy with me. She was happier with me than she was with her wife. But she wanted to salvage her marriage, so she ended things with me and cut contact.

Which led me down my path of shame because I thought I was the one who fucked everything up. But I was innocent. I did nothing. If anything, I actually fucking encouraged them to work on things while Lore and I were dating. I believed they would work out.

And none of it fucking mattered. Because her marriage still ended, and I still cheated on my husband in a fit of... what. Grief? Loneliness? Self-sabotage? Over lies other people told me to fill in the gaps Lore left behind.¹

My therapist said that what Lore did to me was brutal. It's a miracle she isn't asking for a second chance. To own her mistakes that much means that what she did weighs a lot on her. But it was still traumatic, and it's something that warrants attention.

Part of me thinks that what she did was a mercy. I'm happy she shut me out if it meant she was trying to work on her relationship with her wife. It would have gutted me if she had left L for me.

But could she have at least fucking told me? That's all I want from people. To talk to me! Why do people praise me for being kind and understanding only to avoid being fucking honest with me? And if she loved me!!

Mind you, I'm juggling this alongside - and I want to reiterate this - understanding that she felt like she needed to make a choice. If Devon had told me he wanted a divorce because Lore (or, fuck it, Joe) was a distraction, I'd most likely do the same thing because Devon has been in my life longer, and I love him. So while this whole situation makes my head spin when I closely examine it, I'm mainly just happy I have my friend back. I'm actually honestly much happier in general now.

...

¹Speaking of lies. Apparently I got duped by someone who supposedly was someone I could trust! Big surprise! In October 2021, the shadowcast we were both a part of was doing a local show. I brought my (now ex-)friend Talia and her girlfriend Scarlet with me because they loved Rocky. I was honestly just there to have fun. Little did I know, there's this whole thing about exes not supposed to be within 50 miles of each other (sounds made up to me), so things were awkward. Even though I was still technically a cast member. Whatever.

After the show, Talia excitedly ran up to me and said, "Lore wants to talk to you!" Which got me really hyped up because finally, I would get an answer from Lore about why things ended and maybe get my friend back. I wasn't expecting it. It sounded too perfect. But I ran backstage, where I found Lore on her own.

I couldn't decipher the expression in her eyes, especially since she was wearing a mask. I just instantly knew I had done something wrong.

A week later was when we had a very tense conversation, which only left me with more questions. (At the time she said that she broke up with me because of communication issues in her marriage, but what she and I had was "just a lot of fun". So...was I really meant to be a fling? Why did she pick the Human Heart to have a fling with? Was she a sadist?)

Umm. Turns out Lore wasn't even ready to have that conversation in October 2021. She had told another cast member explicitly she was not ready to talk to me. (Which I would have respected. A good dog knows when to heel.) That cast member, though, told my friend - someone who, by the way, was a complete and total stranger except to the one Jewish queer person in the cast, and they were nowhere in sight - that Lore did want to talk to me! Why? Because "the break-up was tearing the cast apart". NO IT WASN'T!!! YOU WERE JUST BEING NOSEY!!

She couldn't have picked the worst person to play Telephone with, either. Talia suddenly had all the ammo she needed to try to coerce me into a relationship with her after Lore cut me deeper.

People really seem to love competing in the Bullshit Olympics on my behalf. Wish they'd stop.