#but he doesn't dwell

[pianokantzart]

Even as a fully grown echidna teen/man, he still is babey deep inside

He is still that traumatized child trying to grow up as fast as he can. He's that kid left utterly abandoned, whose parting words with his father were promises that he would bring honor to his clan one day. He's the last of the echidnas, run ragged trying to fill the gap of the entire civilization and he's sixteen. He doesn't even know that he's still a kid. He should be at the club.

[rottingraisins]

it kinda sucks that you hc a canonically pansexual character as gay (clef)

i deliberated not answering this one bc i dont rlly mean to get into representation discourse or w/e during pride month of all things but i think the sentiment behind it is very fair so i feel bad ignoring it.

firstly, i think it needs to be said that clefs "canon" romantic orientation is very much just, whatevers funniest or most poignant for what youre trying to do with him. i understand the sentiment, there are characters in scp who are queer in a very specific and straightforward way where i'd also be upset if people erased that about them, but clef is not that guy. he is probably the single most contradictory character across the entire wiki, and everyones got a bit of their own take on him.

secondly, to defend my own take a little, i don't even really see clef as strictly homoromantic. i think when applying queer labels to fictional characters one tends to kind of treat them as these ontological, prescriptive truths, rather than how labels are used in real life, by the individual themselves to approximate their lived experience.

what i'm trying to say is i don't think clef the character, at least the version of him i'm most fond of, the fifty something year old reformed casual homophobe from resurrection and co, really knows what the term "pansexual" means, or "mlm", or "demiromantic", which are other words i'd use to describe him if i were using the prescriptive approach.

i think clefs relationship to romance is deeply complicated and not something he spends a lot of time really thinking about, and in practice, despite the theroretical breadth of his capacity to be attracted to other people, he's really only attracted to men, which is to say one particular man who also just so happens to be dead, so there's no point in really dwelling on it.

[pinkd3mon]

Feeling loved

Bonus:

[magnusbae]

On the rare occasions when Hob is actually mad at Dream— he refuses to sleep. Coffee, energy drinks and the God forsaken awakeness pills? All fair game. If he has to inject caffeine directly into his vein, he would. Hob doesn't often get mad, but when he does, he likes to make a point. Dream and Hob match in more than one ways, really, they do. And so it is that the Dream Lord must come out of his realm personally to sprinkle sand into his lover's eyes because he'd be damned if Hob refuses his gift for more than two nights in a row. Not speaking for 100 years? Easy. Hob refusing sleep? Unacceptable.

[weky-woof]

Autumn on PNF-404 brings the cold with it and the Pikmin spend more time inside their leader's strange onions... Louie shares meals with them on the occasion!

[daeva-agas]

Casually lurking in Sailor Moon fandom and when I see posts mentioning the Shitennou's knightly titles, I think the translation are off. I don't know if those are just fansubs being wonky, or if even the official ones are not entirely correct...

I've also seen some posts say that "I don't understand what these means". The knightly titles are based on the image and properties associated with each gemstone in Japanese (so, if it has different meanings internationally, it's quite beside the point).

Jadeite: Knight of Resilience 忍耐 and Harmony 調和

忍耐 is often translated as "Patience" in fanworks. 忍耐 is better translated as "resilience", "perseverance", or "endurance". Even when colloquially used to say "be patient", the connotation of it is more along the lines of "endure this". The Harmony one is correct.

"Resilience" is because jadeite jade is the harder jade. "Harmony" because of its traditional usage in spiritual matters, so jade in general has the image of "peacefulness".

Nephrite: Knight of Wisdom 知恵 and Peace 安らぎ

This one makes me kind of laugh because of what Nephrite is like as a character/person. I almost always see 知恵 translated as "Intelligence". It's not wrong per se, but this term here refers to something deeper than just brain smarts, thus "wisdom". Things like wisdom that come from age, or innate perceptiveness, and so on.

安らぎ is peace, as in "inner peace". Basically, "serenity", though it's probably not a good idea to use this word in Sailor Moon for obvious reasons.

Nephrite being the native jade of China, it has been given very sagely meaning to it that persist even in Japanese symbolism. That's why it's like this, for somewhat similar reasons to jadeite's "harmony".

Kunzite: Knight of Virtue 純潔 and Benevolence 慈愛

純潔 can also mean Purity or Chastity. 慈愛 is sometimes translated as Affection, which is also not entirely wrong. It's just that the standard meaning is benevolence or mercy. "Affection" tends to be used in the context of parents and children. In this context probably not the best meaning to use.

This gemstone is associated with the Holy Mother Mary, of all things, that's why it's got very saintly imagery associated with it.

Zoisite: Knight of Purification 浄化 and Healing 癒し

The most straightforward one so I've never seen any wonky translation with this one. Those who are into healing crystals might already know this, but this title is based on the healing and purification qualities that a blue zoisite/tanzanite supposedly have.

[see-arcane]

Yes everything led up to Dracula drinking Jonathan... Dracula making him stay after signing all the contracts for no business reason and write letters home about having to stay longer for... business. Then him calling dibs on Jonathan at his roommates and promising him to them after he's done with him. Then pulling the wolves at the door incident to force him to stay. Then telling the women on the final night that Jonathan is his tonight, and theirs tomorrow night. But then why isn't Jonathan talking about the blood on Dracula's mouth being his own?

The same reason he doesn't mention anything about what happened after the vampires laughed at his door. The same reason there are so many ominous blank gaps between his entries.

Yes, something awful had happened to him (again).

No, it's not something any potential future reader of his journal needs to learn of if he should die or worse before he can get home.

Better to conserve paper, ink, and his last motes of dignity and clear thinking rather than dwell on yet another violation.

[t-u-i-t-c]

"But I don't think I made the wrong call, back then."

[neversetyoufree]

Looking back through the first couple volumes of VnC, it's wild how much of what Vanitas does in early chapters is nothing but a series of transparent attempts to put himself in control when he feels uncomfortable. You don't notice the first time you read it, or at least I didn't, but he's really quite obvious once you have the knowledge of what subjects he's sensitive about.

I've touched on this before, but I think Vanitas's biggest defense mechanism is theater, specifically playing up his own power/unpredictability in order to make everyone around him uncomfortable. "Vanitas" is a character that he plays, and he weaponizes that character against others when the man behind the act feels threatened.

(Now that we're under the readmore, here's your warning for a VnC-standard amount of discussion of sexual assault).

Even starting in his very first scene in chapter 1, when we've yet to see Vanitas get anywhere close to vulnerable or upset, we get a hint of how he operates. His first attempt to get Noé away from Amelia isn't to physically fight him—it's to play sinister and deliver a vague threat.

He could have gone straight for the knives, or he could have told Noé the truth that Amelia herself was dangerous and urged him to get away. But that's not the person Vanitas is. He doesn't talk things out with honesty, and he doesn't resort straight to violence unless he's really over the edge. He threatens and plays up his dangerous persona to get what he wants.

He even uses the very same line with the security guards later in the chapter, playing sinister again to escape arrest because he might be screwed otherwise.

He's pretty much never authentic pre-catacombs, but moments like this where he dials up the act to achieve something show how in control he is of his own inauthenticity. And he never takes advantage of that control more than when he feels threatened, be that threat physical (like the security guards) or emotional.

When Noé asks him about how he inherited the book of Vanitas in chapter 2, something we now know is a sensitive secret, Vanitas immediately changes the subject. He gets in Noé's space, acting borderline flirtatious (and he often does get flirty as part of his persona), then returns to the topic of Noé being his shield (which is an act in itself, given how he really reacts to being protected).

It takes one poke to the chest and a couple of sentences to switch the conversation from "Noé insists on knowing Vanitas's sensitive past" to "Noé has to deal with the mysterious, overbearing Vanitas's whims," which is just how Vanitas wants it. Playing up his demanding, in your face side buries the threat of an uncomfortable topic.

Then, when Dominique suggests that he worships the blue moon during the bal masqué, we get a much more extreme incarnation of this same behavior. Domi's words threaten to undermine a huge part of the narrative he's built for himself as Vanitas, and they do so by dredging up a truth that he wants desperately to keep buried. He might not worship the blue moon, but he really did love Luna, and being reminded of that throws a big wrench in the narrative of his revenge against them.

He cannot handle having his narrative undermined at this point, and especially not by a reminder of Luna, who is arguably the most sensitive part of his whole tragic backstory. So he freaks out, and freaking out for Vanitas means throwing himself into his false persona as hard as he possibly can. He grows sinister, speaking darkly before breaking into maniacal laughter that startles Dominique and her attendants. Then he hurls his constructed narrative into public view, revealing himself and ensuring that every vampire knows his claim of "wanting revenge."

Nobody's going to forget the human that leapt onto a chandelier in the middle of a ball, revealed himself to be the kin of the blue moon, then swore his vengeance against that very kin, and that means nobody else is going to misunderstand him like Domi and dredge up the truth: that he never really hated Luna.

Going manic and theatrical like this is a defense mechanism, and it's one that ensures not only that Domi stops hassling him, but that, hopefully, he'll never even have to consider worshiping the blue moon ever again. It's a total rejection of an idea that made him uncomfortable, achieved through theater. It also takes a situation that was quite out of his control, his being chained up by Domi, and turns it into a scenario that he engineered, where he is in absolute control of the crowd for at least a few moments.

The best example of all this though, the time when Vanitas combines every form of weaponized persona I've talked about into one awful act, is the scene in which he forces a kiss on Jeanne.

As I mentioned before, Vanitas often plays up his flirtatiousness as part of his persona. He does it with Jeanne quite often, and he does a (usually) subtler version of it with Noé a few times as well. It's a great way to change the subject and make throw people off their game without resorting to threats, and his treatment of Jeanne in chapter 4 is an extreme, but not too surprising incarnation of this same flirty habit.

He might be attracted to Jeanne, but attraction alone is not a reason to force a kiss on an unwilling stranger while ending a fight. Vanitas kissing her was, as much as any other moment I've referenced here, an instinct to protect himself and gain control of a situation that otherwise threatened him.

Winning the fight or not, Vanitas is in a tenuous position in terms of control when dealing with Jeanne. Jeanne is an incredibly strong opponent, and she managed to withstand both a bite from a curse-bearer and a direct stunning hit from the Book. Vanitas has played all of his cards, and his only insurance that she won't murder him immediately is Noé, a man he barely knows, successfully keeping Luca hostage without realizing that's what he's doing. These are not great odds. He's also extremely attracted to Jeanne, and though his initial attraction to her isn't nearly as distressing as his full-on infatuation in mal d'amour, being weak to the sight of her represents yet another loss of control.

Then Jeanne tries to sacrifice herself. She tells Vanitas he can do anything to her he pleases, so long she can protect the child she's devoted herself to watching over, and there is no way on Earth that this moment isn't a trigger for Vanitas, because he once did the exact same thing. He's already in an unsteady situation, and then she reminds him of Misha and his own darkest moments, which means that conversation has to end immediately.

"Please don't hurt him," is the last thing Jeanne says before Vanitas flips suddenly from threats to advances, and his face when he gets close to her is manic.

So when Vanitas gets uncomfortable, what does he do? He changes the subject wildly, suddenly making the whole situation about him and his fickle, unpredictable moods and unreasonable demands. He cranks up the character of the wild, demanding, show-stealing Vanitas to eleven. He kisses Jeanne. And even though it's a cliche line, the fact remains that sexual assault is never really about the sex. It's about power and control. Vanitas does wild things and plays up his persona as a clutch for control when he's uncomfortable, and this is that to an extreme degree. This kiss gives him the power in their interaction.

Plus, the specific bad memories that Jeanne unintentionally triggers for Vanitas are all about bodily autonomy. His own "do what you want to me, just don't hurt the kid" moment was protecting Misha in Moreau's lab, which led to physical violation after violation. It was a complete loss of his agency and autonomy. And his memory of Misha is also deeply tied to whatever happened with Luna's death, and given the possibility of his being made their kin without consent, that memory may also be one of the loss of autonomy.

This scene is Vanitas not just getting triggered, but being reminded of his loss of control and ownership of his body. It makes a twisted kind of sense that the resultant clutch for power and control comes via him forcing his body onto somebody else. He manufactures a situation that is all about bodily autonomy, but he has all of it and the source of danger has none. And he does it all while stealing the show and rerouting the topic as he always does.

Just like so many other actions he takes early in the series, his most reprehensible moment is just another desperate grasp at control. He has to be threatening and showy and unreasonable. He has to be the kind of man that announces himself as savior to a room full of powerful enemies. The kind of man can force himself on a powerful woman like Jeanne. Because if he doesn't drive home the act well enough, somebody might gain access to the horribly vulnerable person underneath.

[befuddled-calico-whump]

Okay, here's something I'd love to see for Kiv- poison. One that leaves him burning up from a fever and in excruciating pain the whole time. He's such a cutie when he's begging and scared.

But it also begs the question... would Sahota be kind enough to help him? Kiv hurts him after all

Poor Kiv would have a vague understanding of illness and poison, but having it happen to him would be different. Hurting from the inside, and nothing seems to make it stop. He'd probably be incapacitated for a while

Sahota doesn't like Kiv, but this mostly manifests in trying to avoid him and acting cold when they're forced to be together. He's gotten pretty good at looking away from violence (or enacting it himself when necessary), but prolonged suffering is a different story. He doesn't like Kiv, but he wouldn't just leave him to fend for himself when he's in that kind of pain

[fellhellion]

his internalised homophobia flavoured cowardice etc etc but genuinely kind of obsessed with the way this is the only glimpse you really get into what yosuke has been mulling over in relation to kanji specifically over the course of like. months at this point.

[lupins-hehim-pussy]

I think I accidentally made Wriothesley AuDHD. fuck

[whereconfusionisarhyme]

i love that there are a couple traits consistent among seemingly all spider-man variants. their wit, they’re dorky-ness, their intelligence. their queerness

but i think my favorite has got to be their artistic creativity. the og peter parker takes photos, miles draws + graffitis, gwen plays the drums, hobie plays guitar, etc.

which only just adds to the un-spider-man-ness of movie!miguel that he, seemingly, doesn’t have any artistic interest or pursuits. his life is so consumed by this need to justify his trauma and make it useful that he doesn’t have anything to healthily express himself and have fun through. he doesn’t have any room left for any personality because he’s too busy being a leader and a weapon.

this also plays into that quick little line from miles in the counselor's office where he mentions not doing much art anymore,,,he's so consumed by this one mission of his (similar to miguel) to figure out how to travel across universes to meet his friends (falsely thinking that will just automatically solve his loneliness) that he's losing that art that makes him happy, purposefully ignoring it because it's not "useful". i think it's also relevant to note that gwen, the character who's defined by her aimlessness, (literally her only goal is survival. like just the bare minimum of "don't be homeless tomorrow", just simple, normal, human self-preservation) opens the movie by going to town on her drum set. on the opposite end of the spectrum miguel and miles are on, she has no goal at all and is fully leaning into her artistic abilities for comfort. ultimately, the difference lies in where these characters are choosing to find comfort. in the pursuit of a singular goal that suppresses emotion in the name of efficiency, or in moment-to-moment explosive self expression that doesn't ultimately make strides towards an end goal?

(honorable mention: hobie and his music. the guitar, ie his art, symbolic of being in touch with your emotions, is something he keeps close with him and uses productively in pursuit of his goals. it's strong, but focused. he's very in control of it. he has figured out how to hit a perfect balance between the two, adding to this big brother/mentor image in relation to gwen and miles.)

[captainamsel]

There's so much going on with Cheris shooting Moth Jedao in the head (the second time) but I'll put my thoughts under the cut for discussions of rape

The thing that gets me about this is that is makes clear how much they are both Jedao, and how much they see themselves in the other even if they don't want to think about it. Does Cheris empty her magazine into Moth Jedao's head because he admits to raping someone? Not solely. She hates that, it's a line Jedao draws despite all his other atrocities, but she's able to keep her cool in every other situation. Like, even when her people are under threat of genocide she makes it look like she doesn't care! One could argue that shooting Moth Jedao is consequence free, and it is, but mostly it's personal. Cheris did not pursue Khiruev, not for strategic purposes and not even when Khiruev was not chained to her anymore. (Cheris's Kel taboos empower Jedao's own even more.) What really gets her, I believe, is the suggestion that she - that Jedao - could be a rapist. This one cornerstone of morality he's trying desperately to protect. And Moth Jedao, as suicidal as the original, knows this. Yes, he's trying to protect the Revenant, but I can't help but feel that he's asking to be punished for what he did to Dhanneth. Perhaps he's even hoping she'll find a way to kill him, and this is the one transgression she would most hate him for.

[adhd-merlin]

unpopular opinion: arthur (as much as i like him as a character) was useless in terms of prophecy and liberation of the magic people. not just bc he never ended up lifting the magic ban but bc literally anyone sitting on the throne could have done that. i see no reason why it had to be arthur specifically. but the show liked to pretend like he was the only way to achieve a positive future bc the opprressed community cant simply help themselves that would be silly ig? no no they need to patiently wait that maybe one day their oppressor (whos literally continuing his fathers genocide even if less zealously) has a change of heart and they wont be hunted down like animals anymore. never mind the countless people that will have to die in the mean time. merlin can kill a bajillion people on screen and thats fine and for the greater good but if someone tries to kill One guy sitting on a fancy chair with a fancy hat suddenly thats too extreme. half the time it felt like the show was pointing to merlin as a poster child of how to act when oppressed. the fact that morgana growing bitter about uthers reign is framed as inherently bad and what directly lead to her becoming evil tm is particularly infuriating to me. the choice to create this very ya dystopian setting and then cast the oppressors as part of the main cast and the final solution is just very weird to me. i think it wouldve been objectively for the best if the magic community had overthrown arthur (or uther really but thats not really contested.. unless youre the bbc. this show is so british (derogatory))

in that vein: mordred has never done anything wrong in his entire life and that includes killing arthur

one more for the "arthur was a loser" folder

[ok but about the rest!! I have many thoughts about it. merlin as a member of an Oppressed Minority. his betrayal of his own kin. I'm putting it all under a cut bc you guys don't need to see me rambling about this and the disir again]

you make a good point — the way in which a story is framed, even the moment we choose as a "beginning", determines what characters we'll feel sympathy for, even when the facts at our disposal are the same.

I don't think the writers were trying to create any kind of deep social commentary btw. just so we're clear. merlin is the hero of the story and his mission is to keep arthur safe. we've got to root for them both.

to have a king with a hatred (fear) of magic gives us a convenient antagonist within the court. merlin having to defend the men that would have him killed for his magic is a great source of dramatic tension. it sort of follows that the people he has to fight against to defend the king/prince are other magic users, or magical threats. (it also keeps things interesting because there would be no challenge for merlin otherwise).

there isn't much of a point in exploring the motives and backstories of other characters with magic (with the exception of morgana, perhaps). They are only briefly touched upon — so these characters remain vaguely antagonistic for the most part. Neutrally aligned at best (see mordred).

We are shown that the druids are (mostly) aware of the prophecy that marks merlin/emrys as the saviour of their kind.

what I find fascinating are merlin's interactions with magic people who are either not aware of this prophecy (gilli) or have no faith in it (kara, possibly?) Because we're never given the chance or the time to see things from their perspective. To see merlin through their eyes.

When gilli says:

"It is time that someone struck a blow for the likes of you and me. And if you're too weak, then I will." (!!!)

It makes him sound like some kind of extremist, but really, when you think about it. isn't his anger kind of justified? I'm not condoning his violence, I'm just saying — it's understandable. uther has killed so many innocent people. literally drowned innocent children. and merlin's like "violence isn't the answer!" — and I can see his point!! but I can see gilli's just as well. and I find it so interesting that he's still addressing merlin as a brother ("the likes of you and me"), even when expressing disappointment in his actions and calling him weak. because they are the same. he's saying "you're deluded, and cozying up to the enemy won't save you"

this episode also contains what is (probably) my favourite dragon call. when merlin summons kilgharrah in other episodes, he's usually in the middle of some Urgent Situation. matters of life or death. there is nothing urgent here, really. yeah, it is arguably a matter of life or death, but nothing merlin couldn’t have stopped on his own. he really just called on kilgharrah to have a heart to heart with a friend — a member of his class.

("You are a creature of magic, and only a creature of magic could hope to understand.")

this episode is about merlin looking for kinship and still feeling isolated from his magic brethren. there's something tragic about the way the prophecy makes him unable to connect to some of the people who would be best placed to understand him.

and gilli plants a small seed of doubt in merlin's mind. "You've been pretending for so long now that you've actually forgotten who you are" (!!)

but kilgharrah reassures merlin that there's a golden age coming. so merlin does what he has to do — he saves uther once again. before gilli leaves, merlin reassures him that one day they will be free.

he tells mordred the same:

"It won't always be like this. One day we will live in freedom again."

and then, when he has the unique opportunity to use his influence on arthur to sway his opinion in the right direction. he fails.

he condemns himself, and the people he spoke to of freedom, to keep living in fear and in hiding — and what's even more upsetting, he does so while talking of a "just and fair kingdom"!

("You must protect the world you spent your life building, a just and fair kingdom for all." What an interesting choice of words. camelot isn't just and fair to all — as merlin knows well. he's lying to arthur, and possibly to himself.)

imagine being gilli or mordred and hearing him say that "there can be no place for magic in camelot." (!) What a slap in the face.

I've read meta suggesting that the disir were testing merlin just as much as arthur (or even more so than him). I'm inclined to believe it — I want to believe it. If anything because it makes the story all the more interesting and tragic. (I know what some are going to say — if mordred's destiny was to kill arthur, it would've happened anyway. but remember what else kilgharrah said — the future is never clear. there are many paths).

I understand why merlin did what he did, I really do. but for a moment, the fair and just kingdom he spoke of was within reach, and he failed to grasp it.

so was gilli wrong after all?

[and kara. I feel quite sympathetic towards her. we know arthur. she can't see him from our (merlin's) perspective. for her, he might as well be uther. magic people are still persecuted under camelot's law. she has spent her life on the run, she has seen people she loved be killed. and from our (arthur's) perspective, she looks like some kind of fanatic. but in reality. put yourself in her shoes. when arthur offers her a chance to save herself by "repenting" for her crime, she says she has nothing to repent for. "it is not a crime to fight for your freedom". that's the belief she's willing to die for. did she deserve to die for it?

(I also think there's an interesting parallel in merlin failing his kin in the disir, and arthur failing mordred in ep 5x11 by condemning kara to death. something about pinning all your hopes on someone who's going to fail you, and doom you both. idk idk.)]

sorry anon. you were saying

[longagoitwastuesday]

Both Nobara and the blonde witch (Momo?) make good points about the role of women in this Jujutsu society. Momo points out that power is not enough for them, that that which is good enough for men isn't for women, that they are held to higher standards, and for them scars aren't badges of honour as they are for men, but make them undesirable and damaged goods.

And then there's Nobara, pointing out those are sexist standards one doesn't have to adhere to, that it's on them for playing by the rules and having those exigences in mind. That she likes clothes and looking pretty, but for herself, she doesn't expect it from others or respect more someone who does as well if they don't want to, like she likes Maki but dislikes Mai. And she too is right! It's true that adhering to those exigences perpetuates the standards! But what she says doesn't negate what Momo says, which is the fact that, yeah, okay, it sucks, but that's how it is and not playing by the rules just makes everything harder. And harder still for someone like Mai (or Maki) to whom perfection isn't just the goal, but the very starting point being people from one of the main clans. So she can understand and defend Mai's position and approach to the problem, as Nobara understands and defends Maki's.

This all gains layers of complexity and juiciness considering Momo and Mai are Utahime's students and Todo's classmates. I am sure the manga won't go there, but wow is it intriguing how Utahime's situation may have influenced their views. What a pity the manga won't go there