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dykedvonte · 8 days ago

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You ever just see a Mouthwashing take that makes you want to bang your head into a wall? I literally just saw someone claim Curly couldn't have been emotionally abused by Jimmy before the crash because he was in a higher position of power than Jimmy.

-Shrimp Anon

The mouthwashing fandom has shown me that people genuinely do believe that certain types of abuse are not as detrimental as other types especially when they deem those immune/resistant, ergo, believing one is objectively worse no matter how it affects the person nor the intersections of power, history and dynamics at play.

Get ready cause this is a yap session:

Cause like it's heavily implied that Curly and Jimmy's friendship was toxic and abusive, pointedly in the direction of how Jimmy uses Curly's belief/comfort in him. Curly wasn't forced to enable Jimmy but he was emotional and mentally on edge around him in almost every scene in some way. Mental and emotional abuse are not contingent on what positions you have at work. Yeah, he's Jimmy's boss but he was Jimmy's friend first and it's like getting into Psych discussion to talk about how social power tends to overshadow any perceived organizational power in the human mind. People are concerned about their jobs ofc but they tend to hang onto and put more value/investment into their personal relationships, hence why there tends to be laws and restrictions around mixing the two.

I always see the sentiments that "Curly is a grown ass man", "Curly is bigger than Jimmy", "Curly is Jimmy's boss", "He just needed a backbone" as criticisms of Curly and while I do agree that on the surface level all of these to be true and viable ways Curly could've taken more control of the situation, I often look at the parallels of Anya and Curly as victims of Jimmy pre/post crash.

The way Jimmy talks to Anya post crash is how he talked to Curly in the pre-crash segments. It's hard to pin-point mainly because we know he hates and wants nothing to do with Anya compared to his contrary but similarly handled obsessions with Curly. It's a weird sort of "honey-moon" effect of abuse Jimmy does in terms of emotional and mental victimization. He is always horrid to Anya, always talking down or questioning her abilities and thoughts in a situation, this of course includes the harassment and assault. However, he has a moment of attempted gentleness/conditioning when he question her about the mouthwash when she's contemplating drinking it at the table. The key difference is he has no personal investment in Jimmy outside wanting nothing to do with him, meaning there is no sort of romanticized version of him that he can condition her off of. He knows this, hence, why he always reverts to trying to make her to scared to oppose him.

This sort of give and take of "kindness" doesn't work on her because she knows he is just doing it to take more from her than whatever he could possibly give but it reflects even the "softer" scenes between him and Curly where he always rewords or rephrases Curly's sentiments and concerns to sound more shallow. He is feigning a deeper understanding by reworking Curly's emotions into something bad and needing to be hidden. Everything is laced with envy and resentment, an outburst just around the corner, I mean he even slams the table in the birthday party scene, a tactic in emotional manipulation to set the victim on edge and cloud their ability to respond. Even if Curly knows Jimmy won't get physical in that moment, the physical actions is intended to make him back down in the confrontation in case it does. This is something that is just not person specific. It ingrains itself into how you interact with the world and life and it shows in major and minor ways with Curly.

Post-crash, the abusive nature is more in tandem to the physical victimization Anya went through and the stripping of voice and autonomy we see take place. Like the parasite in HFIM, Jimmy speaks for Curly most of the time and puts words in his mouth, similarly to how he takes Anya's plans as his own. He very commonly, with the both of them mind you, supplements the worst aspects of himself into them; pettiness, selfishness, lack of understanding... And tries to cover himself with their best qualities; kindness, planning, initiative, etc...

These parallel are just to say that positional power has little to do with if a person can be abused and how it can even be flipped to further the abuse. There is no doubt that Curly could've picked up on Jimmy's envy of his position hence another reason he never confronted him as a Captain but as a friend as doing so would immediately put Jimmy in a space to be confrontational/combative.

I think the disdain some people have when they talk about the heavily implied if not implicitly stated emotional/mental abuse Curly experienced being Jimmy's friend is when treating it as an excuse to why he didn't do more. I can understand that completely because it is not an excuse to why he didn't do more but is a very real reason people in his position in these scenarios can experience whether in the context of a work or social environment. However, I also think the way people talk about it really does demonstrate a bigger problem when talking about abuse when somehow who is/was abused is either part of the issue or enabled it.

Harkening back to the sentiments about Curly's inaction regarding Jimmy, I think the exact phrases I used/have seen show how there is an inherent belief that it is easier to overpower the effects of emotional/mental abuse that go in tandem with the perception of Curly as someone who should be able to. There is not an age you suddenly stop being susceptible to abuse nor a set point or low where you realize how it has affected you. You don't suddenly know to stand up or put a face on to face your abuser nor admit that you inadvertently enabled them to subjugate someone else to the same treatment. Maybe it's my psych brain but their is this growing belief that direct action is somehow easy or always the best method with the game shows you instances where it is not always the case. In real life that rings true too. He should have done more, but it's not impossible to see why he struggled to find a way or didn't even if it makes us mad.

It's not easy to suddenly gain a "back-bone". You don't immediately want to resort to aggression, especially if it mirrors the type you were a victim to. You don't want to believe you allowed yourself to be treated this bad, let it get that bad or allowed something bad to happen to someone else. It is easy to be in denial, to retreat to your thoughts or make excuses to avoid the painful truth. It's frustrating but in a way we know is relatable. It why we both hate and love Curly for it. We know we'd be better, we think we'd be better, we like to think we wouldn't falter in the same ways but it's always easier to say that from the outside looking in. It's easy to see what he was doing wrong because we are seeing it, not him, but the game really does make you picture what you would do if this was your raw reality and it's why this debate about Curly seems so never ending/contradictory. We can all say what we'd do but bottom line is that's much different when you're in the moment with all the emotions and human feelings attached.

I personally think Mouthwashing tackles the themes of rape culture, enabling, toxic masculinity, types of abuse and patriarchy in ways that are meant to deconstruct the typical straightforward views we mostly have of these concepts and how little subtilities of them are just as, if not more, detrimental than the overt/obvious parts. The game deals with the idea of little details and bigger picture in a way to show that sometimes the bigger picture is not the issue but the little details that make it up. It's why I have a personal dislike of depictions of Jimmy as the typical horrible person who would of course do something like this because the game is about noticing the little warning signs, the foreshadowing and foresight.

It's why I dislike the typical discussion of "bro code" and "boys will be boys" for the game because the game makes a point to avoid the standard depictions of such. It is about the type of men who still enable despite not condoning, agreeing or even perpetuating harmful beliefs because they can't see the little details or the ways it seeps into their everyday. The severity is not obvious to them as it was not obvious to Curly, Swansea or even Daisuke the way it was to a woman like Anya. There are little details about Jimmy that should ring alarms but if you are too naive like Daisuke, too distant like Swansea or too conditioned like Curly, they are just off markers.

There is 100% more constructive/concise ways to say "Curly was a victim of Jimmy's abuse on an emotional and mental aspect that clouded his judgements and perceptions in the scenario" while also critiquing on the side of "Curly still had a responsibility to protect Anya as a crew mate and Captain that he failed to do due to biases and stigma's he failed to surpass" without the weird condemnation people give him about should've knowing better than to let himself be manipulated by a person he considered a close, if not family/best-friend and had his own reasons to trust initially. Also stop being weird about victims of abuse in general with this fandom, like sorry not everyone has a like social epiphany the moment someone's nasty to them. People are treating it like you immediately know when you are in a toxic relationship immediately or comprehend when a person is actively dangerous and either it's your fault for not knowing how to leave/cut them off or you deserve it. Like the hypocrisy of people believing how certain fans treat the story reflect their irl views but not their own is crazy.

End statement is: I honestly don't even know man, I've been writing this too long and just like no man on that ship was perfect or really helped Anya when it mattered and I feel like pitting them against each other in discussion on who did the least or most or how it was justified sucks cause in the end Anya always did the most and best thing for herself.

#i also think it is because mouthwashing is first and foremost a game about rape culture and the patriarchy especially in work spaces #regarding women and centering conversation around Curly a man rubs people wrong because it does overshadow that commentary #but it still mixes other topics into its initial theming and message on how abuse conditions you to accept certain things that are harmful #and how getting used to a culture/enviornment does not mean you are happy healthy or most importantly safe in it. I personally like to #explore those aspects where it mixes all the themes so we can discuss the ways you have to watch out for things because there is a differen #in the idea Curly enabled Jimmy just because they were bros and because he was an example of another man afraid to step out from what #is a still oppressive system that does try to punish those who act against it even if they fall in the category of those who would benefit #from it as Jimmy and PE 100% represent that sort of misogynistic system where men that would be “good” are altered until they follow line #in a way both on the personal and professional level as PE is the corporate lock out and Jimmy represents the social and its just the issue #that the discussion of it sounds like “in defense of men” when I am more so trying to discuss how it is much deeper than men being scared t #upset other men but complacency is rewarded by not becoming another person subjugated hence as all the moments Curly does try to do #something we can tie it back to how Jimmy reacts and a possible penality from PE where we now need to address the ways to combat those #two concepts so we dont get cases like Curly or Daisuke or Swansea where male avoidance of the issue is considered neutral or even good.#i think most of this boils down the perfect victim mentality to where if someone who underwent or is being abused is not a perfect example #or accpetible type than their abuse can not be considered a valid or substantial reason for effects on their behavior compounded with the #fact that Anya's abuse at the hands of Jimmy is a systematic issue that Curly is a part of even if unwillingly and was more physically #violating and topical cause sometimes i have to remind myself that all media is still critiqued through the lens of the culture it came out #in cause i do think about what if this game came out inlike 2014 like the conversations would be sooooooo different could you imagine it?#but back the before statement Curly isn't perfect but I feel like boiling it down if hes a good person or man is not the point of the game #but more so good people can still be part of the problem and the idea of condemning a person for one act creates a false sense of #rightouesness and justice that does not aid the victim and in fact aids the abusers in escaping blame for their mulitple behaviors as we se #how the men on the ship tend to blame Jimmy for just one act against them including himself while there is a plethora of things Anya is #concerned about with Jimmy #and its not that Curly just made one mistake with Jimmy but more so we consider his actions more damning because he didn't stop Jimmy #instead of focusing on the fact Jimmy did what he did regardless of Curly and the consequence because we already know he's bad n maladjuste #which is problem in the conversation where the individuals are blamed but the system and perputrator are overlooked in a sense of acceptiab #complacency as we know how they are and the lack of tangibility to personally affect them on a larger scale like I should just make a post #on like cutting out the face when it comes it confronting systems of oppression rather than tag talking but just ask me to clarify if #you want that like im jus trying to say we avoid talking about Jimmy and PE so much cause it is obvious what they do wrong that we make #the initial and inherent problem out to be one aspect someone in this case Curly does and the the constraints they use to force actions

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iamamythologicalcreature · 17 days ago

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Carry On Through the Ages (all the way back to Ancient Egypt)

"A Prophesied Rivalry:

This painting, remarkably well-preserved, was recovered from the tomb of a previously unknown and as-yet unidentified woman of significant power, whose rediscovery has fascinated Egyptologists. Historical analysis suggests she was believed to possess a gift for prophecy, and this artwork is very likely an attempt to illustrate one of her visions.

Here, she and her husband are depicted championing their son, who faces an outsider in combat. The outsider is also supported by an enigmatic figure of seemingly great power, foretelling a great struggle between two mighty forces, though whether these forces were meant to be supernatural or more mundane is not clear.

The dog shown, intriguingly, held a place of honor within the family and was found interred in a nearby chamber. The cat's presence, however, remains enigmatic, as the "Cats vs Dogs" reputation cultivated by these domesticated animals today is not something observed elsewhere in Ancient Egyptian artwork. Noted Egyptologists Miriam Blackwood and Theodore Langston have half-jokingly speculated that its inclusion was a mere artistic preference, hinting at the painter’s fondness for cats."

I've always loved Ancient Egyptian art, ever since childhood. I've wanted to do something like this ever since I first read of Baz's ancestry, so @carryonthroughtheages seemed the best excuse to dabble in this ancient art style.

I talked to @monbons about it and apparently the stars and planets were in alignment that day, because she agreed to collaborate with me. She’s created some absolutely gorgeous fiber art to go along with Natasha’s prophecies. And then she surprised me with a Baz doll, because she is amazing. (I love him so much and we are going to look at fashion books together. It’s going to be awesome.)

This is definitely fanart of both Ancient Egyptian art and Snowbaz. Both are worth diving into if you find yourself curious to know more!

#snowbaz #baz pitch #simon snow #cotta 2024 #carry on through the ages #ancient egyptian art #fanart of ancient egyptian art really #collaboration with monbons ftw #I did so much research for this but I definitely did not become an egyptologist over the course of a month #though damn I really wanted to #credit to my brother for the academic analysis #he's gifted #(Also in case you were wondering Miriam and Theodore are completely fictional though now I want to know their entire life story)#and if you're curious I love the Brendan Fraser version of The Mummy the bestest #though the Tom Cruise one has epic costuming #(I think the fashion of the period is what got my interest way back when if I'm honest)#Did I mention this Baz doll has JEWELRY?#I love him so much I will probably not shut up about it for awhile #I also probably drew this piece as an excuse to put Baz in jewelry #though now I wonder why I ever thought I needed the excuse #YAY COTTA #Jodarta

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track-staryaz · 6 months ago

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If you had to choose, what was your favorite Yasammy moment in Chaos Theory specifically?

You know, I could go on about so many scenes, and I mean SO MANY. When I say I absolutely loved them in CT I really do mean it.

From the “I love you”’s, to the constant girlfriend calling, to their Strife in episode 6.

From the constant physical contact to “Wanna make a little Chaos?” “Maybe.”

To the entire sequence of them nearly drowning. (MY GOD I can yell about that all day)

But Anon, you know what really gets me about them this season? And whilst its not a moment specifically.

It’s the way they constantly look out for each other.

Protect each other

Even if it puts their own life on the line.

Even if they could get hurt.

As long as the other is okay.

That’s all that matters, right?

Consequences can be thought about later.

#consequences be damned until you’re stuck on an island with a busted ankle #‘I did not think this through’ HAHA gay brain takes over #chaos theory #jwct spoilers #chaos theory spoilers #yasammy #yasmina fadoula #sammy gutierrez #ngl the first gif it wasnt until I slowed it down did I notice Sammy pulls Yaz behind her before kicking Kenji

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simptasia · 2 months ago

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LOST: Season One

#lost #abc lost #lost one cap per ep #this was a project i was gonna do anyways but the timing worked out that i could post the first one on the 20th anniversary!#this is one cap per ep every season. from left to right. and this is important: its not a cap that sums up each ep #its a cap that REPRESENTS each ep. the way i choose them varies every episode #sometimes its an utterly iconic moment. sometimes it reps the theme of the ep. or it hits with a theme of the character themselves #sometimes the cap i use won't even involve the character whose centric episode it is. trust me. this makes sense #anyways i'll give a good example: for outlaws i was so tempted to use a shot of the judgemental soulful gaze of the boar #or perhaps sawyer in the rain after he shot that man #but! i used that shot of sawyer's dads legs as sawyer is hiding under the bed. i feel it worthy because this moment. this scene #is literally a core part of sawyer. it's a defining moment of his backstory. of his character. so yeah. makes sense yeah?#anyways some eps had Too Much going on (lord i could make one of these for exodus part 1 alone) and some not enough #or well they DID but like lacked in caps that Hit in the way im thinking. thank heavens charlie shot ethan cuz i was worried about that ep #i was like ''aw shit what am i gonna use'' and then an iconic lost moment happened kjhfdsjkhfd #anyways. there are 25 eps in season one. so im really glad that the last ep contains one of the moment iconic visuals/moments in all of los #oh i should add that these caps are unedited. i did not fuck with the colours or saturation in any way #i found 'em and i pieced them together. this is harder than it sounds. i browsed through all the screencaps of every ep of season one #and i will do so the remaining five seasons #some of these were super easy like i knew what cap i'd be using before i even started (eg. do no harm. the moth. in translation)#but some took some real Thinking. and some eps even had several caps that would have worked. this has all been quite interesting #also yeah. y'all already know damn well what cap i'm using for the very last episode

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bumblingbabooshka · 1 year ago

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My name is [BRUTUS] and my name means [HEAVY] so with a [HEAVY] heart I'll guide this dagger Into the heart of my enemy

Something about having absolutely no choice in who you marry. About being literally forced by the law to spill blood - to accept this stranger as your husband over a man you truly care for or accept the fact that the man you love might die because you put him in danger. Something about risking becoming the wife of a man you've never even seen before a few minutes prior because you know anything would be better than putting your beloved in harm's way. Something about the trust inherent in that decision and in the way she speaks of it after. Truthfully, T'Pring doesn't know the captain and she doesn't know Spock. Either one of them could have taken her as their wife but she does know Stonn. She knows that Stonn will remain by her side no matter what. They made a plan together. They have an agreement which T'Pring believes will be upheld even though the plan changed with the arrival of Kirk. Stonn will always be there, always, and Stonn will be hers. Something about the language used around T'Pring: Ownership, subservience, non-personhood. T'Pring is an object that Spock can win. She cannot reject him, she has no say in the matter other than having Stonn 'claim' her instead. Even when Spock leaves after being very clearly rejected by T'Pring he says "Stonn, she is yours." as if despite her clear rejection he still owns her and is must formally 'give' her to Stonn. But the language T'Pring uses around Stonn is a break from that: "There was Stonn who wanted very much to be my consort, and I wanted him." Stonn who wanted very much to be HER consort and she WANTED him. The language here is very particular - It's not, for example: "Stonn wanted me to be his wife" - he is HERS. And she WANTS him. There's a mutual affection there and a strong trust - a trust which seems to be well founded since Stonn (though silent) stands by her side at the end of the episode. <- That might seem small but if Spock would reject her for 'daring to challenge' (again, the language is not 'because I don't want you' but more of an implied disgust at her having the AUDACITY to reject him) then it's not a stretch to assume that it'd be considered an insult in the TOS Vulcan society to NOT choose Stonn as her champion after a prior agreement. Anyway T'Pring was a woman in an impossible situation within a society which saw her as more of an object than a person and she wanted Stonn and Stonn wanted to be hers and she trusted that he would understand if she had to publicly pick someone else to ensure his life would be spared and he did understand.

#amok time #T'Pring i s....T'Pring she....-puts my head through a wall-#PLEASE read under the cut for my rambling about T'Pring in amok time pleasepleaseplease #tired of 'T'Pring is evil/a bitch' and VERY uninterested in 'T'Pring is a girlboss'#T'Pring is a person in a society which doesn't think she has the right to make her own choices who's in [love] with a man who [loves] her #back in what I'd like to think is implied to be a slightly subversive way in its mutual and fervent nature (whether the writers thought #this was a good or bad thing - who knows. We know better RIGHT??)#and yes I will stylize T'Pring's hair differently every single time I draw it HEHEHE #star trek tos #Spock #T'Pring #also of COURSE something something spock/kirk & stonn/t'pring parallels: To keep your beloved safe you have to force someone else to kill #theirs - not BC you hate him (you don't) but you don't love him either and why does HE get to have you even if you don't want him?? Why doe #he get to 'give' you to the person YOU chose?? It's not a hatred on a person level (which I wanted to portray with the 'brothers') portion #but a sort of societal embodying.#I will think about T'Pring not wanting to be 'the consort of a legend' every damn day !!!#They really could have laid it on thick in making her evil guys...T'Pau even makes a comment about Spock's 'vulcan blood is thin'#but all T'Pring says is that Spock is a legend and she doesn't want that for her life. She wants Stonn.#And you're gonna sit there and you're gonna tell her that she's wrong!??? Spock doesn't even want to be with her!! Why is she so hated!?#CAN WE FREE MY GIRL??? She did all that but it's being read in the worst faith possible!!#comix page #bea art tag #star trek art #She literally says the word 'FREE'...she's TRAPPED!!!

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yantao-enthusiast · 6 months ago

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pleaaaase stop tagging wlw ships that are background on the mlm fics !!!!! the majority of that wlw ship tag is clogged up with mlm with just a dash of wlw when all the people want is them to be the stars PLEEASSSEEEEEE

#so happy yellowjackets exist #because all men are background and majorly unimportant #except javi my son i love him and he will survive the winter #no but think about how if you go in an mlm tag at least a majority of them are focused on said ship #but suddenly when it’s wlw #you have to dig through the trenches (at least five ao3 pages) before finding fic focused on that ship #IN THEIR OWN DAMN TAG!!!!!#ig it’d be harder if they’d want to filter it out if they removed it #but maybe. they should just learn how to read #or accept other opinions #anyways!#wlw #wlw ship #wlw post #sapphic #sapphic ships #if this is a safe space #genshin impact #NONE OF THE TOP RELATIONSHIPS ARE WLW #DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH I’VE HAD TO DIG FOR YANTAO FICS SOMETIMES #genshin #yantao #ganqing #eulamber #heavy side eye to #mauraders era #hp marauders #the digging i did for marylily was unacceptable #marylily #dorlene

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pine-arten · 10 days ago

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the wanderer

#pinemartart #rain world #rain world downpour #rw downpour #slugcat #rw oc #rain world oc #oc: the wanderer #dude i started this in september sobbing emoji #i had been working on it off and on... but then i stopped for a while. finally finished it #never drawing shit ever again <- lying #YES.... i know the wanderer is a very common slugcat oc name. i forgor when i made it </3 #i looked through the passages like everyone else and was like. oouhhh the wanderer #tried to do it in the style i did w cremepuffe.... but errmmm i went a little crazy with it. so not rw style #do NOT draw backgrounds worst mistake of my life ...#this thing has like ten billion layers too #since i separated different body parts for easier work. but man #also if anything looks or weird in the shading... um..... ignore it #anyways um. i think i do actually like how it came out #i'm having a hard time though since i've looked at this drawing too damn much to really tell #but i think it's good. <3 yay #edit: NOOOOO TUMBLR KILLED THE QUALITY OF THISSSS AAUUGHHHHHH #whatever. whatever. it's fine

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triglycercule · 26 days ago

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killer being like "yeah i know every single little thing about horror and dust" (because he watches them as a part time hobby (freak) (find something better to do)) and then he acts surprised when they do something that he wouldnt expect them to do in his little predetermined absolutely perfect concept of them

like what do you MEAN horror licks spoons clean when he's using them so he doesn't have to get a completely different one for the main course and the dessert. what do you MEAN dust has a lisp even though he speaks fluently and uses even more complex words than killer himself. horror knows how to sew and he often patches up their things without either of them noticing?? dust always wears oversized and clothes that cover him up just because he finds it comfy?? what??? out ra geous???? these guys have small little quirks to them that killer doesn't already know about???? killer immediately wants to know more. so he can expand his internal profile of them of course. not for any other more endearing and sweet reason. not at all,,,,,,,, (:3)

#AASHSHAHHHHH this one is so cute....... this thought. thank you brain for making this thought #it's like killer's experiencing sonder (except he's not aware of his own complexity of life because of his own derealization/personalizatio #actually i dont think this deserves to be a side blog post. this is too damn CUTE #at first the 2 were probably weirded out by killer watching them and now they probably dgaf...... killer comments less than youd expect #but now theyre used to his shit so they do all these tiny things that killer gets to pick up on and learn more about them #its so interesting...... killer can do as much reasoning as he can to try and find a logical reason for why they do these little things #but in the end if the real reason is just because they wanted to or they felt like it then how can killer comprehend that?#how can they just do that so easily and choose to do things based off a whim instead of having a calculated precise reason for personal gai #he wouldnt realize it on his own but noticing those little things coming fron horror and dust who used to be like him could help with the #everything is just a game and i am simply an avatar and the ultimate goal is the win aka be the most powerful #for dust and horror theyve already turned their consoles off. theyre out of their games theyve finished. their goal was just to beat it #(like if horrortale finally got the good ending it deserves because of aliza horror would have finished #if dust beat the player and due to extreme boredom (ITS GOTTA BE EXTREME EXTREME) decides to leave to explore the multiverse)#in killer's eyes theyve achieved their goals. but killer's still playing his game. maybe he IS the game. but eitherway he's not done #like they r. so taking into consideration how other versions of himself act when theyre finished with the game could he act like that 2??#did HE also finish his game and he never realized it? should he be basing these ideas off dust and horror when theyre kinda not the same gu #killer would find so many hoops to jump through to justify getting rid of the everything is a competitive game idea but there would be smth #IDK im just rambling. i gawt this idea from me imagining them fight. ya you wouldnt believe this sweet thing came from trio abuse :3 #killer psychoanalyzing dust and horror is one of my favorite things eva. horror would HATE IT (if he were aware #and dust would totally be freaked out and keep to himself incase killer's planning anything against him #but uaaaghhh pretend this isnt canon this is triglycercule's ideal little world where they explore the mv and have fun #killer watching dust and horror sleep because he doesnt feel tired while theyre all in bed #and he's just picking up on how theyre positioned. how they breathe. the little things.......... djdjshahahaaahsushdjwbdsn ssosooooo cuuut #tricule hc #killer sans #horror sans #dust sans #murder time trio #utmv #dare i say mtt poly. ok i dare say it. but like lowkey he'd do this whether theyre together or not...... killers just weird like that......

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merlinfromberlin · 12 days ago

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Imagine. TFP but there was an ancient spirit/deity living in the Star Sabre.

Bee, after the fight at the Omega Lock, can't remember anything that happened after picking up the Star Sabre for the first time. His memories only set back in once he pulls Optimus back up onto the platform.

None of the Autobots discuss it either. The only thing they told him is that he killed Megatron. But they refuse to elaborate beyond "you grabbed the star sabre, jumped down, stabbed Megatron & saved Optimus".

Bee himself is not even aware of the hole in his memories at first. But then Raf starts asking questions about the fight and Bee always answers with the same sentence. "You know... it was a real doozie, but I got... lucky, I guess."

The first time Ratchet hears Bee say that, he flinches violently and then pretends like that is absolutely normal behaviour. No, you did not just see him crunch his incredibly fragile medical equipment. It's always looked like this.

Optimus also starts acting odd towards Bee. He can't quite look him in the eye but keeps observing him from a distance. They've also stopped their philosophical discussions (yes; I'm going to insert my headcanon that Optimus and Bee watch ATLA together and then use it as a jumping off point to discuss Cybertronian philosophy and culture into everything).

None of the bots would admit it, but all of them are doing their best to keep Bee confined to the base. He is barely out on patrol anymore. It gets even worse once they are back on Cybertron because now he doesn't even get out to pick up Raf anymore. He's always kept busy indoors. Not even Smokescreen wants to sneak out with him.

Still, no one wants to answer his questions about what happened at the OmegaLock. He tries to corner Smokescreen and Bulkhead about it because they are the weakest link when it comes to resisting Bee, his shenanigans and questions, but neither of them budge.

And then Bee starts noticing other signs of change. Sometimes, his optics will suddenly just burn brighter. Bright enough to illuminate dark rooms or reflect on metal surfaces around him. Sometimes he is no longer sure that they're really blue.

Then, one night, he has a dream. He is lying somewhere, prone on his belly, unable to move and incredibly tired. It's hard to comprehend anything that's going on. His surroundings are bathed in blue (?) light and he can't see him, but he can feel Optimus being there, incredibly tense as he stands in between Bee and something that's so old it should have dissolved into dust eons ago. Optimus and the thing are talking but he can only gauge snippets of their conversations before something soothes him back into deep recharge. Last thing he hears is Optimus' yelling his name.

Then he wakes up at the entrance of their base, Optimus and Ratchet waiting for him as he returns from a drive. He has no clue where he went. Or why they look at him as if he was a ghost. Until he checks his internal chronometer and realises that the equivalent of a week has passed.

And when he asks what's going on, Optimus just pulls him into a hug and holds him for a long time, not saying anything.

#damn #it's a shame I can't start another WIP right now xD #I'd also need to figure out what exactly is going on #spirit didn't do anything to OP because he's protected by the Matrix #hm... i'd need to figure out what exactly the spirit wants with/from Bee though #maybe it's somehow connected to Primus and wants to revive Cybertron?#or maybe that's just what it says it wants #mh... who knows...#need to think about this #also - can you tell that I watched stuff about ghosts today #just to be clear: Bee still died. It's just different. he also did not get his voicebox back. and he doesn't know he died.#uh... I'm so setting this onto my list of possible future fics #transformers #bumblebee #also - why is smokescreen not the possessed one?#1 - didn't die #2 - most importantly: not the special blorbo of this blog #putting him through the horrors is just not super interesting to me #3 - maybe some protection put onto him from Alpha Trion?#fic ideas #tfp #horror esque #possession

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