#but anyway nothing special just father son vibes

[smallvictorianchildwhofoundwifi]

Long ass story, the post finally arrives! @the-copycat-hero

On the same road that a young boy takes on their way to his friend's house is a hospital. A hospital that is always busy with someone to help, so busy that the people occupying their rooms tend to blur together.

And even in the absence of the boy and the house that gave a roof to the wonderful family of the boy's friend, the hospital still stood on that road. The hospital with so many rooms, one couldn't count them without getting mixed up and turned around.

But in the mix of madness, hidden in the blur of the patients, was room 4307. The room that held a great tragedy and a great miracle of one person experienced and seen by no one before.

When passing by room 4307, the voices of several teenaged students could be heard.

A knock on the room door grabbed the attention of the three students, and the door opened to reveal a familiar scruffy man, with the most droopy red eye, constant annoyed expression, and long black hair to frame his face, perfectly signaling his "do not talk to me" vibe. Except now this man was a caring teacher, checking up on his after-mortem student.

"He should be free to leave in another week, if the doctors decide he's recovering well and it's safe for him to walk, train, study, the whole shebang." Aizawa-sensei answered the question the students hadn't known he'd heard.

"Now," he continued, not waiting for any of them to reply, "I understand you two are worried reps, but Monoma's got a few other visitors today."

Taking the hint, Shoda and Kendo said their goodbyes and exited the hospital room.

Monoma rested his chin on his hand and groaned to the teacher, "You sure know how to clear a room Teach, but they really couldn't have stuck around for a few doctors visits?" Monoma never needed to say just how much he loves his classmates and wants to be with them, but he always pushes sneaks it into a conversation anyways.

"Oh it's not just doctors."

Monoma was confused. The last he checked, none of his classmates were allowed to visit him because of his condition- Kendo and Shoda having special permission that Vlad-sensei fought for under the guise that they're his class reps.

A figure emerged into the doorway that Monoma hadn't realized was still open. A figure of long blonde hair and pale skin, who's dark green eyes were too faraway to be in the body of a caring mother, visiting her living son.

"Neito." She said loud enough so that he could hear with his very limited hearing. It wasn't unnatural to her to speak like that, she had to do the same thing growing up with her mother with the same hearing loss as her son.

But now she had to do it so her son would know she was there, not just what she was saying.

"Oh." is all he could find within him to say. Aizawa looked between the two before leaving with a quick note that he would check on Monoma later.

The woman stood in the doorway for a few moments, looking around the hospital room; the iv, the monitors, and every piece of furniture had more eye contact with her than Monoma did.

"I wasn't expecting you to visit."

The simple sentence struck her out of her stupor, looking at him almost offendedly.

"You've been in the hospital almost a week, after being dead for days. You just fought in a war and are expected to skip back over to school, and you didn't think I would visit?" Her voice raised a little as she continued talking and walked a little closer to his bed.

Monoma thought of 100 things to say to her, none of them nice, but instead he looked back at the doorway with all his might to see the blurry sliding door closed. No one else was expected to enter.

"I see dad isn't with you." Monoma tried to meet his mother's eyes, his words carrying another message: if he can't be bothered to visit, why should I expect you either?

His mother took a sharp inhale and squeezed her eyes shut. "Your father- he..." they both knew she had nothing good to say.

"He has nothing to do with me. I'm so happy you're okay." She said with such tenderness you could believe that it came from a caring mother.

Monoma wanted nothing more that to believe her- she had no reason to lie- but he couldn't stop his stupid mouth from talking. "Yeah I bet you no longer have to worry about fighting over who has to deal with the funeral services."

Monoma couldn't see it, but her face cringed for a moment, just a moment, where she looked guilty.

Despite his blindness, her silence spoke volumes and Monoma knew exactly what that meant.

"You didn't...”

"Neito I-"

YOU SERIOUSLY FOUGHT OVER THAT?! DO YOU UNDERSTAND HOW CRAZY THAT IS??"

"I know, but I do care about you Neito- that was just-"

"Oh yes, the love and care I feel." Monoma usually had a better handle on his emotions, but at the moment he really didn't care how he was acting, he just wanted his mother gone.

"I DO-" the woman who was practically foreign to her son stopped as she realized she was shouting, and finally walked up to his bed to cup his face and spoke in a quieter voice.

"I do care about you. I love you so much, and I'm sorry that I haven't been able to make you believe that. And I promise, I will do what I can to make sure you're safe." The emphasis on safe made Monoma nervous.

"What do you mean safe?"

She let go of Monoma and backed up just a little bit, still making eye contact. "I'm taking you out of UA."

Monoma felt his blood run cold and his heart drop. "... what?"

"Neito, look around. Look at you!" She waved her hands around frantically before gesturing at her bedridden son. "Is this really the life you want for yourself? To be getting injured all the time? To die on a battlefield?" Her voice rose the more she spoke and this time she didn't try to lower it.

Monoma didn't know what to think, what to say. All words died in his mouth. When he was a kid, all he wanted was for his parents to pay attention to him, to care about him- and now he was getting that in the worst way possible.

"I am not leaving 1-B." Monoma said slowly

His mother looked aghast. "Those people got you killed and you want to go back?"

"What the hell did you expect when you convinced dad to let me be a hero? Did you think I was just going to sit on my ass-"

"Language, I am your mothe-"

"AND DO nothing!? My life is always going to be on the line. And YOU agreed to that when you let me be a hero."

His mother stared at him for several moments before speaking up again, much quieter than before to where Monoma could barely hear her, "Well I'm taking that back. I'm sorry Neito."

They stood in silence until they heard the door slide open again, a doctor and Aizawa on the other side.

"Pardon us," the doctor said, "Are we interrupting?"

Monoma's mother quickly broke eye contact with her son to address the doctor, "No, I was just about to head out. Pardon me if I stole important time from you doctor.”

"Oh you can stay if you’d like, it's just a check up and typically parents stay with their kids during these." The doctor clearly didn't understand the situation.

"It's just a check up right? She doesn't need to stay." Monoma stared back at his mother with a look telling her to get out.

Before she left she announced, "I'll be back tomorrow." And left with a nod.

Aizawa eyed her until she was out of sight and snapped his attention to Monoma, but said nothing.

The next day, true to her promise, "Mrs." Monoma made her way into the hospital that her son had been staying at for the past week and a half.

Her heels clacked on the tile floor as she started to make her way up to his room before hearing a man's voice from behind her.

"Ah, Mrs. Monoma."

She turned around to find the owner of the voice was the scroungy man who was next to the doctor yesterday. A teacher, she remembered, but his name...

"Hello. You're one of Neito's teachers, yes?" She didn't bother with reaching out a hand to shake, she didn't want to formalize with a man who helped kill her son.

"Aizawa Shouta, Mrs. Monoma. We haven't properly met."

"Well, now we have. If you don't mind me, I'm going to visit my son- who is hospitalized." Monoma said shortly, a soupcon of resentment in her voice, as she turned around and started to walk away.

Aizawa didn't try to stop her but continued talking. "Your son is actually a topic I wanted to discuss with you. We've been informed that you plan to remove him from the hero course and UA entirely, whether he wants it or not."

Monoma stopped in her tracks and whipped around, "Yes well, sometimes people make decisions for others without asking their permission. It's how things get done." She slowly walked towards the audacious man, her voice etched with discontent. "It's what UA saw fit to do when they shipped off our children to war with little regard on if they'd come home to us."

The mother stood in front of Aizawa with a face of anger and her voice a threatening whisper, “Now you may see my actions as paranoid, or stringent, but I am doing what is best for him and one day he will understand that. It doesn’t have to be tomorrow or next week, but this is the decision I have made and he will just have to deal with it.”

Aizawa understood where she was coming from. The hero commission demanded that everyone with a hero license were to fight, and no parents were made aware of this in case there was an uproar in reaction. Illogical, in his opinion- and look how that decision landed.

But as much as Aizawa understood and agreed with this mother's anger, he came here for a reason. "I completely understand your decision. However, your son loves being at this school, and being with his classmates. His homeroom teacher has reported that he's been much happier as the school year went on and Neito finds a lot of comfort in his friends here. If you were to take him out-"

"YOU GET NO SAY IN WHAT IS GOOD FOR MY SON'S WELLBEING." Monoma suddenly shouted as she stuck an accusative finger in Aizawa's chest, "BECAUSE OF YOUR IDEA OF "SUPERVISION", NEITO IS STUCK IN A HOSPITAL BED FOR THREE WEEKS. HE HAS A DEATH CERTIFICATE. I WOULD RATHER NEITO HAVE A LIFE AWAY FROM UA THAN NO LIFE AT ALL." She took in a shaky breath and lowered her arm to her side, body tense and unmoving.

The air was thick as silence followed the mother's shouts. Then suddenly, Aizawa lowered his body in a bow and spoke in acquiesce.

"You're right. It was my job to keep your son safe and I failed. Because of my failure as a hero and a caretaker- you, your son, and all his classmates have gone through a terrible experience and I cannot offer enough condolences and apologies to erase your pain, as much as I wish I could." Aizawa paused for a moment, clearly pensive and radiating sorrow. He kept his bow low and respectful and took a deep breath before making his request, "But despite what has happened, Neito still wishes to be a hero. He wants to continue his educational journey here at UA, and he wants to continue his life alongside his friends in class 2-B."

"So please, do not take away Neito's dream because of our shortcomings."

Monoma looked at the pleading teacher as if she had been turned upside-down. Working her entire career in the modeling industry and then at her husbands company, an actual remorseful apology was rare, and was certainly not expected from the "heroes" entrusted with her son's life and had messed up horrendously. She felt ambivalent staring at this man with an eye patch and a metal leg, realizing that those are from trying. This man had truly tried to protect her son and might have even given his life to protect him.

But all she could think was her son having the same fate- missing limbs and appendages, failing to save people and feeling sorrow and despair. Her heart wouldn't be able to take that.

"I can't... I can't do that to myself, or my son." She spoke slowly and low, her voice thick. "Have a good day." A clear end to the conversation and Aizawa watched as the woman turned and walked away, making her way to her son's hospital room.

As Mrs Monoma started to open the hospital door, she stopped at the sound of two distressed teenage shouts coming from the room.

"WHAT?!"

Through the small opening she had made through the door, she watched a short, round faced boy with light blue hair and a taller muscular redhead girl converse with Neito.

"She's taking you out of UA?" The boy said.

"She can't do that- I mean, this has been your dream for years and-" the distressed girl spoke quickly but Neito managed to cut her off.

"I know..." He held his hand up to motion the girl to stop, "But I don't think there's anything I can do. She sounded pretty ready to take me out."

Seeing the dejected look on Neito's face made his mother so upset to see. She knew that he didn't like this decision but that's what is best for him... right?

The boy sat down on one of the chairs next to the hospital bed and sat in thought, his eyebrows knit together. "And you're sure there's no way of convincing her?"

Neito's voice broke as he spoke, "I... I don't know." He brought his legs towards his chest, something the doctors definitely wouldn't approve but Neito showed no pain.

The redhead girl gripped onto the end of the bed and was practically shaking in anger. "Why does she care?" She whispered.

Mrs Monoma felt offended by the outrageous question, but there was something tugging on the back of her mind, a blurry memory of someone with red hair.

The round faced boy looked at the girl like she was suddenly someone unfamiliar.

"Well, any worried parent might do this, we should've expected it. I mean," he let out a chuckle, trying to lighten the mood, "I'm surprised Midoriya's still enrolled."

"But it's not like she's ever cared before." The girl let out an aggravated breath, "Now she just- appears out of nowhere and-"

"Kendo." The boy interrupted, "there's no point in getting all mad over it, Monoma's the only one who gets a say in what to do."

At the mention of the girl's name, the memory snapped to the front of her mind, and Mrs Monoma remembered a little redhead girl at her door, along with an older boy who looked similar to the girl, saying she was Neito's friend. The boy introduced the two of them as the Kendo's who lived a few blocks away.

Neito, still curled in on himself, just shrugged and mumbled something.

This "Kendo" seemed to have heard him and suddenly reached out her hands and held his face- much more aggressively than Mrs Monoma recalled having done just the day before, but Neito looked less tense with her. No, not quite "less tense", he was just comfortable. Comfortable with her, and not his own mother.

"No-" Kendo started, "no it is not okay, and we are not going to let her take you out of UA."

"But what-" he started to argue.

"You love it here don't you?" The girl interrupted. Neito stared at her for a second, surprised by the question, before letting out a small 'yeah'. "Then we are not going to let her take you out."

The hidden mother sucked in a small breath at that. How could he love it there? Regardless of any happy memories, they had gotten him killed. They couldn't guarantee his safety anymor-

They already couldn't guarantee his safety for a while.

She remembered hearing about the USJ attack, and when they were attacked at camp. She'd thought about how dangerous it was, and glad that Neito was okay, but she'd never thought to take him out over it. She barely even thought to call. She didn't care when they insisted on housing him- and all the other students.

UA had been a danger for a long time- all the more reason to take him out now.

The girl was half on the bed after reaching out to Neito, but was too focused on his face to notice or move, "You have wanted to be a hero for YEARS, and I won't let anyone take that dream from you, you hear me?"

The other boy spoke up as well, "Yeah, we'll all be right there with you, just give us the word."

Neito looked between his two classmates and his eyes became glossy. Kendo noticed and crawled on the bed to hug him.

The moment was silent as the two sat on the bed in a tight hug before Neito whispered:

"I like being at UA."

"I know Monoma."

"I don't want to leave."

"I know, we won't let you."

"I don't want to change my life, I like it now."

Kendo said nothing but squeezed him tighter.

...

....

"I don't want to change" the words rung in her ears. The woman behind the door felt as if she couldn't breathe, breath became irrelevant, unimportant to the mind of this woman. "I don't want to change," how many times had those words echoed in her head in passing thought. How many hours had she stayed in bed, wishing she hadn't changed herself for a faux man, who spoke empty promises. How many years of her life was wasted away because she allowed others to decide her life.

Hiromi no longer felt that she was standing on a hospital floor, or that she was standing at all. Everything felt lost, that she was floating in everything her life was, floating in nothing.

Hiromi? When was she last called her name. She wasn't Hiromi anymore, she was a Monoma. That's who she had been for the last 17 years of her life. That's all she was.

Is this how Neito would feel when he was in his adult years? Had he already reached his adult years? He just fought in a war, did he really still feel like a child? Could he?

Mrs. Monoma found herself sitting on the floor, clutching onto the chair next to her, but she couldn't feel the grip, couldn't feel the cool tile floors. She couldn't feel anything. Everything was lost- her life was lost, the man she fell in love with was lost, her son was lost, her beautiful sister was lost, the wedding of her dreams was lost, the cozy home she dreamed of filled with laugher and love was lost, what else? What else was ripped away from her, what else had she chosen to throw away in exchange for a life she didn't want, hadn't desired. When had this happened.

She felt as if she turned around and everything was suddenly gone. But she knew it wasn't true, she could feel the pathway of her life crumbling as she walked for years. She's cried so many nights as she felt the unsteady cracks catch at her heels and make her trip, scratches and bruises appearing in every single place, later replaced by scars, scars replacing every single part of her, leaving her nothing of the same person she once was, the giddy and ebullient woman who loved the world despite it's battles. She was now cold and emotionless, broken by the world, by her world, and breaking everything else in the process.

And yet still she walked, on a cracking, breaking, spiraling road, because what else is she supposed to do? What other road is there to go? There's nothing left, every other road she had was destroyed with her own hands till nothing else was left, nothing to fix the road, nothing to know the road even existed, except maybe a shared name or a picture, but even those are cracked and freyed, erased and thrown out.

Over the years she worked and worked, trying to appease her in-laws, trying to wash out her emotions and everything she loved in order to be taken more seriously. And for what? To become "Mrs Monoma"? "Mrs" "Monoma". That's all she was, a Monoma wife. A wife to that slimy, stinking, rotten man that can't even stick up for his WIFE, the woman he CHOSE to love, chose to MARRY- instead it was left up to her to to go against those foul people, and look how good she was at that. Left with a son she didn't want, a house she didn't want, a job she didn't want, a husband she didn't want, a title she didn't want- a "Mrs. Monoma"

Mrs Monoma

"Mrs." "Mrs." "Mrs." Was all they ever called her.

What about Hiromi? When was the last time someone ever called her by her name? When was the last time she talked to someone who called her that?

"Mrs." Oh it was all she ever heard anymore, "Mrs" "Mrs" "Mrs-

"Miss?!" Hiromi felt someone gently grab her shoulders and lightly shake her, knocking her out of her stupor.

Suddenly she could feel the cool tile floor underneath her, the grip her hand had on the chair next to her. It felt as if all of her senses came back in an instant and immediately short circuited, the lights blinding her, the ringing sound in her ears making it hard to hear what the nurse next to her was saying.

Hiromi's eyes focused on the woman and let her ears slowly stop ringing to let the nurse's voice into her head.

"Ma'am are you alright?"

"Ah, yes yes I'm fine." Hiromi put a hand on her head as if suffering a headache. "Got lightheaded for a moment is all."

"We should get you some place to lay down and some water." The kind nurse helped her up but Hiromi stepped away from her.

"Oh no I'm quite fine now, I'm just visiting my son and I'll be leaving."

The nurse knit her brows together and cautiously reached for the woman's arm. "It's dangerous to shrug off dizzy spells, do you have them frequently?"

Hiromi could recall a few after a good many hours of staring at her computer screen, or working long hours of calls, meetings, reviewing products, writing papers, and other grueling tasks- but those were caused by overworking herself. This was fine, she was fine.

"No, I don't, I am completely fine. Thank you." She began to reach for the door next to her as the nurse continued to reach for her arm, when the door suddenly opened and two high school students were on the other end.

"Oh." Kendo stared Mrs. Monoma with no attempt to hide her surprise that the woman has visited.

Hiromi knew there were many things she should say to this girl, many apologies and many thanks. But at the moment, she didn't care to do any of it; she walked past the two children and walked right for Neito.

"Miss I really do think you should sit down-" the nurse shouted but Hiromi didn't care. She kept walking towards her son and reached her arms out surround him in a stuffing hug. Probably the fist hug she's given him since he got into UA.

Neito squeaked at suddenly getting pulled into a hug, especially since he had no idea what was happening, having little vision and little hearing. But he was a smart one, from what little he heard, what he could feel, and who had yet to visit him, Neito could reasonably deduce that it was his mother hugging him.

Reasonably.

But… why was she hugging him? Monoma tried to look over where his mother had stomped over from to gain some context.

He could see a blurry figure that looked unlike his classmates walk closer and speak loud enough that he could hear her worried tone, before she suddenly stopped as Monoma could feel his mother say something, although his head was swimming so much he couldn't discern what it was.

The arms around him squeezed him tighter for a moment and Monoma could hear his mother's voice.

"I'm sorry."

Monoma could barely understand his mother. He could hear her, but what she said made no sense. Why was she apologizing? What stirred her so much that she was apologizing?

His thoughts cut off when he heard a sniffle, and his mother moved a hand to hold his head.

"I'm sorry." She said again but in a much wobblier voice.

It felt like had time stopped, the two stuck there like statues- unmoving and unbound by time. The only movement was Monoma shifting a hand to complete the hug. He held his mother and he held on tight: an action he had wanted to do for so long.

Monoma felt like a child, holding onto his mom as she hugged him tight. It felt childish to admit that the whole time he had been cooped up in the hospital, a small piece of him wanted to hug his mother. It felt dumb too.

Neito was never close with either of his parents, his mom felt estranged to him. But in that moment everything felt...

Right. Like two pieces of a puzzle finally connected. Neito wanted nothing more than to just stay there with his mom. For a moment, for a year, for forever- it didn't matter- he just wanted to stay right there.

[sozzledjuja]

Pappy and The Staff: Thoughts on the Twins' Past

Following up on my previous post,

This scene in Lucky Star was super short and not that meaningful, but it was literally the ONLY time in the show where the twins mentioned something about their past or family (if you don't count the time Mephisto got hit in the head by a lobster crystal monster, and started asking "mommy" when they were going to the merry-go-round or whatever)

So they got a special powerful artifact in their family that is only passed down to the men. mmhh

Which could mean nothing, I know. Maybe it has nothing to do with misogyny, and it's simply a "harmless" family tradition. Maybe the female line in their family also has stuff they pass down, and this was just a regular Praxina moment because for once she couldn't have something her brother had. Which is a very sibling thing to do actually. Also, she was definetly jeaulous in this scene. And maybe a bit mad (hurt??) he didn't tell her about it.

Or maybe not. Who knows.

Plus, Mephisto rubbing salt in the wound, you gotta love him.

Still, this moment is definetly giving "Whoever Pappy was, he liked Mephisto better, and Prax is still bitter about it" vibes.

I think I heard somewhere that Pappy was their uncle (did he just visit sometimes?? did he live with them??? who knows) and if he has the staff, he's probably their mother's brother, or their father's older brother, who didn't have sons. That would make Mephisto the heir of the staff.

Totally unrelated to the original point of this post but that man was definetly the fun uncle (he was a court jester, c'mon) and he DEFINETLY preferred Mephisto over Praxina. Like, 1) the boy was gonna get the staff from him so it's obvious he would want to teach him and spend more time would him, 2) as a court jester, I'm assuming he preferred Mephisto's more bumbling personality, and 3) homegirl Praxina was not happy at all when Mephisto talked about the staff's origins, and she spoke about the man with a lot of disdain (mostly because of his position. which could also be her rejecting her family's "lower" or "unbecoming" status). also she was clearly jeaulous. So definetly not a big fan of him.

We know she's "always been an overachiever", as Mephisto put it in Home Pt1, while being yeeted into the stratosphere by Amaru, so i imagine she was already pretty good at magic when she was younger (good for her age, and better than Mephisto, at the time). And I headcanon she also wanted Pappy's approval at some point, and he... well- didn't care for her that much/as much as Mephisto.

To be fair, Praxina definetly strikes me as being that one child that works really hard to be impressive, but the adults around her are just like "Eh- that's nice. Anyways look at the other one who just did a cartweel and fell face flat into the concrete, omg awwwwww, so adorable and fun".

I don't think she was ever very "socially adept", I mean we saw Forget You!Praxina, and she was a social disaster. Maybe she didn't really know how to connect with people very well or people found her to be too abrasive or difficult to get along with, so she just- convinced herself she didn't need anyone else anyways.

Nothing too dramatic, but it can really shape a child.

And then Gramorr came along and their family went POOF somehow, and suddenly magical ability was all that mattered and not how "likable" or "sociable" you were, and it made her feel validated in a way. Maybe that's why she seems more interested in taking over Ephidea than Mephisto.

Maybe deep down she thinks that she's just naturally "unlikable", so it's easier to be "evil" on purpose, because then at least people have a reason to dislike her. She doesn't want to acknowledge the fear that if she did ever try to be nice, or to genuinely be herself without filters, she isn't sure she would ever good at it or accepted.

Or maybe this is just cause she gives me Azula vibes and I'm trying to project my Azula obssession onto her but whatever. MOMMY ISSUES. And UNCLE ISSUES. FUCK YEAH.

And the opposite goes for Mephisto, who Gramorr seems to have less patience for, despite him seemingly being at an even magical level with his sister.

Because while I think Praxina's struggles and insecurities come from a difficulty in forming connections, I think Mephisto's own issues also stem from comparing or being compared to her in terms of magical ability, cunning and ruthlessness. Which could've come from the parents (though we don't know anything about them or what the family dynamic was like while they were alive), or just one of them, or only started with Gramorr himself.

Honestly, the twins' backstory has got to be one of the most well kept secrets this show has.

Welp- that's it for today, i'm all out of brain power. Super interested to learn more about Ephidea and the twinss

[the-sky-queen]

Introducing! Prince Udando of Tharos!

Character Notes:

14 years old.

Crown Prince of Tharos, a planet dominated by rules, traditions, and symbolic meaning. Udando finds all of it suffocating and wants nothing more than to escape.

His mother, Queen Erikonia, is unyielding and cruel. She constantly pushes Udando to be the best and punishes him when falls short. Udando's late father was similarly critical, constantly disappointed in his son and only interested in people that could be of use to him.

Udando is snarky and rebellious, but he knows there's only so far he can push before he puts his life in his mother's uncaring hands. He stays within the most important boundaries even though it makes his skin crawl.

Despite his distaste for Tharos' very nature, it's all Udando knows. When confronted by objects or gestures with no specific special meaning, he has difficulty wrapping his head around the concept.

Tends to be rude and dismissive. He also struggles with social cues since he wasn't raised around normal people. (Boy has a bad habit of invading people's personal space. XD)

More than anything, he just wants to be a normal kid.

He's a bookworm and loves to research whatever catches his interest into oblivion.

Design + Other Notes:

Udando was honestly very difficult to design! I have this brainstorm paper I've been chipping away at for like a year, but I always struggled to get it to feel right. When doing this iteration of Udando's design, I honestly threw out quite a bit of what I'd initially brainstormed. Stuff like his head shape, the fact that he had ears, the shape of his feet, and him having a cape instead of the scarf he has here.

I've always known that Udando was going to have pitch black eyes. I thought it would be a fun contrast because, fun fact! Tharos is absolutely covered in bioluminescent, glowing plants. I also thought the black eyes would be good for making Udando somewhat mysterious since you can't tell where exactly he's looking. But back on the topic of Tharos' plant life, I realized it would make total sense for Udando and the rest of the Tharians to be very bright and neon in coloring, since way back in the past, those with colors matching the environment would have a better chance at surviving in what I'm thinking was a very hostile landscape.

I debated giving Udando those dragonfly wings, but ultimately decided to let him have them. They made a lot of sense because the eyes and antennae were already giving insect vibes. And speaking of the antennae! Udando can use them to detect vibrations and sense changes in the atmosphere.

Tharos is absolutely riddled with objects of symbolic importance, so I made sure to give Udando a few accessories as part of his royal getup. The crown, the wrist gauntlets, and the ankle rings all have special royal importance. I think the scarf was given to Udando by his dad shortly before he died, so even though they weren't on good terms, the thing has meaning to Udando and he refuses to get rid of it. Erikonia probably wouldn't let him throw it out anyway. As for the necklace . . . that's where things get tricky.

You see, Udando originates from this unposted AU of mine called The Black Prince. There, as part of Tharian tradition, Shadow gave Udando that necklace as a symbol of friendship between the Tharians and the Black Arms. (Shadow has a similar necklace in the AU that identifies him as the crown prince of the Black Arms.) Here's where the problem comes in. I kinda REALLY want to put Udando into my Sonic-verse, but that necklace and his relationship with Shadow is kinda VITAL to his character development. And without the context of The Black Prince, I'm not sure how Udando would meet Shadow and get that necklace. I'll keep working at it. I've got a few vague ideas right now, so we'll see how they go.

But for now, yeah! That's Udando! I love him so much and I hope you all do to!

[baby-xemnas]

i will never ever be over the fandom’s desperate attempts to explain away law’s unusual special treatment of bepo as “law considers bepo his son”. like?? law is 26 and bepo is 22?? they literally grew up together??? it is way more unbelievable and nonsensical that law would view someone who is only 4 years younger than him, someone who he grew up with, as his son 😭 not to mention nothing about lawbepo dynamic gives father/son vibes. makes you think though, why so many of them bypass attempting the big brother/little brother argument and jump straight to father/son argument 😂 ?? anyway that side of fandom just gotta come clean, cut the bullshit and admit they hate furries and move on lmao

IDKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK

like i dont insist everyone ships them you can dislike furries or human x furry ships its fine - dont have to be for everyone, id never force it. (wild that this time my rare pair is legitimately unorthodox and not just unpopular for no reason other than "there are hotter options")

but you are SO fucking real abt the why not big bro and lil bro?? like isnt it cute?????????? sibling-like dynamics are mad cute!!!!!!!! and older sibling having hella authority works just as well. doesnt make any sense why they bypass it, you are so on the money with that

tbh fandoms are fucking weird abt THATS X'S DAD shit they toss it way too willy nilly

[ipreferfiction]

Jiggy.

MY SPECIAL LITTLE GUY MY BLORBO LOVE OF MY LIFE. i am insane about him. he is the character of all time

My first impression: huh. i don't know what's going on here but he seems interesting and competent.

My impression now: i would kill and die for him. he is my favorite character in mdzs and one of my favorites EVER. he has so many layers!! a-yao....

Favorite thing about that character: he's COMPETENT. to an absolutely insane degree. learning what he did about cultivation from shitty useless manuals and forming a golden core as an older teenager/young adult takes an INSANE amount of talent, not to mention HENSHENG??? he is the only (named?) character to have a soft sword, he's adapted bits of fighting styles from multiple major sects, and he's skilled enough with Hensheng that at some point he has shattered multiple spiritual weapons with it. he was a spy under WEN FUCKING RUOHAN for months. he and wwx are entirely responsible for winning the sunshot campaign and he dealt the final blow. also what he did with the song of turmoil?? equally insane amount of talent.

Least favorite thing: the Bad TakesTM. he attracts them like FLIES

Favorite line/scene: Lan Xichen! In this life, I’ve lied countless times, killed countless times. Like you said, I killed my father, my brother, my wife, my son, my teacher, my friend—of all the evil in the world, what haven’t I done?!...But I’ve never even thought of harming you!

i am very normal about them.

honestly his entire Guanyin Temple showing is nuts in the best way and i am chewing on him. close seconds are him on the stairs of Jinlintai looking at Nie Mingjue and going, of course they and I are different! the utter RESIGNATION of it. the truth of it!! he will never be treated like the rest of the cultivation world, he knows it, and Mingjue can't see it like he does!

Favorite interaction that character has with another: every time he and xichen are on screen or on page together is just. so nuts. the box scene. guanyin temple (god!!!!!!!!!! augh). everything cql added in.

A character that I wish that character would interact with more: Qin Su!! she needs more time anyway but god their relationship is SO TRAGIC and i love looking at AUs where the whole marriage can be avoided and there aren't lasting scars left on both jgy and qs from. you know. accidentally marrying your half sibling because your shared father is a rapist. also, we get zero real looks at how their relationship is before everything goes south and it pains me.

Another character from another fandom that reminds me of that character: this is so fucking hard oh my god. there are bits of He Xuan and Ling Wen that i see in him, i think? especially the. "i was born the same day as you and i am cleverer than you but my life was a tragedy and yours was perfect, so why was I not worthy of the same fate you were? why did I get nothing when you got everything?" and the "you know what? I am tired of cleaning up your messes. i am going to cause problems now." he also... i cannot explain this one but his vibes are very similar to Alexander of Tirragen from the Song of the Lioness quartet in my mind. i genuinely truly cannot comprehend WHY those two are associated in my brain, but they are.

A headcanon about that character: he was in love with Xichen and Xichen was in love with him. god bless the cql xiyao agenda.

A song that reminds of that character: lying beast by run river north - it reminds me very much of what he would think of himself esp. towards the end (and guanyin temple)

An unpopular opinion about that character: he and Mingjue's relationship could not have been fixed, or at least not without considerable effort on Mingjue's part, post-Sunshot and especially around the time of the stairs before JGY starts playing turmoil. JGY did not need to put more effort into it! he was already putting effort into it! Mingjue's worldview is fundamentally incompatible with JGY's existence, frankly. It never mattered how hard he tried to mend the relationship because Mingjue would always see him as a liar who was trying to manipulate him, and the sworn brotherhood was not a good idea, Xichen, good god.

Favorite picture: all of them but especially these. i support his wrongs (he has never done anything wrong ever in his life). he is the prettiest man alive and yet!! he suffers! but oh god his thousand yard stare after Mingjue kicks him down the stairs...

[strywoven]

no one at all: me, dropping a new ( mha/bnha ) verse: ................. 🧍

don't ever say i don't do nothing for y'all ( i'm doing this for exactly 2 people ) . another yappening incoming, so it'll be under a cut. it's unspoken in this post but verona, sloan, and kadai have roles in this verse SOMEWHERE ... i shall get around to expanding upon that later anywhere between 6-10 months weeks. anyways, tw for: self-mutilation, mentions of abuse & neglect, murder, etc. proceed with caution if that's not your vibe.

Some say that “the family home is where the deepest resentments grow”. Often, we never realize how true that is until there’s no undoing the damage which has already been done, collected over years spent in suffocation within these walls that held onto each miserable memory made.

In a word, the Rolavs seemed altogether normal; just another average, nothing-special, nuclear family with everything to hide. Yet you see, NAMES BURDEN WEIGHT ( at least, that’s what tradition might say ), and this one is no different. “Rolav” is a surname belonging to a long-lived clan of villains ( a criminal organization, shall we say, which operates off animalistic creed & specializes in hunting, in eluding the public perception ) . With trace roots back to SCOTLAND - a heritage boasted in their savage disposal of requested/required quarries - the family itself is oftentimes regarded as an “INVASIVE SPECIES” by other criminal families of the villain underworld ( however, are regarded with no less respect ) . The Rolavs are - or were - a prominent player, as far as powers go. However, in recent generations, the heritable Quirk most notable to the clan - “ALL-FIRE” - has become unstable, unpredictable, rendering most progeny currently with it, entirely unable to properly utilize it to its fullest potential. Which brings us to the current era, where Ceres Rolav, the standing patriarch of the family, is desperate to have a child that would carry the Quirk and manifest it IN FULL, just as it was generations ago. The issue being, there’s no guarantee that it would ( at least, not without destroying the child in the process; but, to secure the bloodline, sacrifices are necessary ) .

Per tradition, the Quirk would likely pass down to the FIRSTBORN SON who would then be raised to inherit the clan itself and assume the role of patriarch ( & to effect, he shall also inherit the name “BRAZEN HART” ) . However, Ceres’ whole world turned over when he was met with a doe ( a daughter ) rather than a buck ( a son ) . In fact, he was disappointed, concerned, even a bit angry. Despite his so-called wife’s protestations, Ceres endeavored to raise the child as planned, AS IF MALE, completely ignoring their birth gender and proceeding to groom them for their role as future patriarch irregardless.

Ceres’ regime with young Kaen was relentless. He was less and less a father and more a stringent authoritarian, impressing upon them the looming demands of their future inheritance ( & nothing less than perfection was ever acknowledged ) . Kaen’s childhood was little more than hours spent being drilled on family history, on family tradition, on family creed -- always ABOUT FAMILY & STRENGTH & HONOR IN THE GLORY OF FIRE . Very few times did their mother stand for them, did she curtail Ceres’ insatiable ire and ambition ( instead, her always-sulking, half-drunk presence made things worse ) . Though, there was one memory that sticks out to Kaen, even now, where their mother told them: “Don't be like me. Don't be like your father. Be better. DO GOOD THINGS.” Words that they didn’t understand the meaning of until many years too late.

Kaen’s peace was found in being able to go to public school, escorted away from the hidden-away estate tucked in a remote location somewhere in the mountains. And considering Ceres made strides to keep his “professional” and personal identities separate, Kaen was able to have a mostly normal school career. It was, at least, until Kaen’s Quirk manifested at age 5, bursting to life in a sudden act of altruism that nearly set several other classmates ablaze as they stood to defend another from getting picked on. Unfortunately, even when the teachers rushed in, Kaen found it INCREDIBLY DIFFICULT to snuff; this, a recurring issue that was never quite solved. Several other accidental incidents of arson occurred in the months thereafter, leading to a meeting between Kaen, their parents, and the principal to discuss “options”. But truthfully, everyone already came to a simple conclusion: to remove them from the school and eventually the public entirely.

Ceres remained with Kaen and their mother for ONLY ANOTHER YEAR before something in him seemed to change the more and more he noticed Kaen’s Quirk evolving. Kaen overheard him telling their mother, “That is my son, I know, but there’s something else in him.” And no sooner had they heard this discussion than they distinctly remember the scene of him walking out the door without so much as a backward glance. Despite everything he put them through, Kaen tried to run after him, only for their mother to grip their shoulder - a little too tightly - and hold them in place, telling them that he was not someone worth chasing nor wasting their tears on.

From bad to worse, Kaen’s life from then began to spiral as their mother did not take well to Ceres outright abandoning her with a child who possessed an out-of-control Quirk. The only signs that Ceres - or even that the rest of the clan itself - still held any regard for her and Kaen were the infrequent deposits of money into her bank account, as if INSURANCE to keep them at least somewhat afloat and sustained in his absence. Otherwise, no matter how often Kaen saw their mother try to reach out to him ( & to other members of the clan ) , Ceres seemed to have fallen off the face of the country. So, it might’ve been fear that drove her to do as she did, drinking so much, ignoring Kaen’s needs, striking out at them again and again and again-- Or perhaps, it truly was her own brand of resentment ( even if misdirected ) .

In those years, trapped in that house with that woman, Kaen became very familiar with the police, having called them on numerous occasions for some sort of help ( or some sort of comfort ) . And what good it did. Nothing ever changed ( & why would it ? ) . Particularly, there was one woman that stood out: Yuna. Yuna had just joined the force, and didn’t anticipate becoming so fixed in the life of a teenager as she did, so keen on trying to “save” Kaen from, what exactly, she wasn’t sure yet, but she knew she had to. She managed to convince their mother to allow Kaen back into the public, under supervision, so they can continue a proper education, and - thankfully - to remove them from the house for at least part of the day before a more suitable solution can be recognized.

Before they know it, it’s the summer, during academic break. Summer makes their Quirk especially active ( heat begets heat, as they’ve realized when they were younger ), and even more so worsens their temper. Kaen was currently nursing a blooming welt on their ribcage from their mother’s recent tirade earlier that evening, and suddenly it all becomes quite clear: you have two options, their father’s voice echoes, you either live or die, that’s the way of things, so make your choice. And they do.

Kaen musters up their courage, compounding it with the contempt which has been building within them for years, and looks into their mirror. They’re gaunt, haggard, beaten-looking-- And there, atop their bedraggled red mane, sits a budding crest of antlers that resembles their father’s. It’s instinctive, then, this sudden surge of HATE which seethes in them, compelling them to grab those awful little horns, beginning to YANK & PULL , their body jerking disjointedly. It hurts, yes, but is this really anything in comparison to what they’ve already gone through? No. They can tolerate it, just a little more-- And with a sickening, awful CRACK , the antlers splinter in their hands, the bone breaking off and falling into their bruising palms, rivulets of blood trickling down their brows and into their eyes. Their reflection grins back at them, own teeth grown sharp and gaze burning in a way they don’t recognize. This will do.

Whatever happened next is not pretty, and most of the evidence was lost in the miles-wide inferno that ensued ( a fire which also engulfed them in the process, yet strangely did not harm them ) . But the remains of the corpse of Kaen’s mother - whatever could be recovered of the near-ashes - divulged the fact that Kaen brutalized her with MAKESHIFT WEAPONS before setting everything in the surrounding area ablaze ( that is, the detectives found the scant remains mangle-twisted around … antlers, of all things, likely wielded like knives ) .

Kaen was just 16 at the time, only an honors-level student in a small, civilian high school located in the foothills ( no-one knew, no-one had any idea that they were capable of such violence when all they did towards their peers was smile & act so kindly ) . The official reports said they had A PSYCHOTIC BREAK and once apprehended, Kaen was put on a hold to be properly evaluated, just to cover the bases. During this time, Yuna approached Kaen, noting that they seemed PARTICULARLY CALM for someone who is facing severe charges and just suffered an intense mental fallout ( in her words, “they don’t look the same anymore. whatever came out of that fire wasn’t the kid i knew.” ) . Yuna told Kaen that it would be a conflict of interest for her to have any involvement in their case, however she intends to give them a lawyer for the upcoming trial. When Kaen asked her why she’d ever do that, Yuna shrugged and said, “Some people are worth making mistakes for.”

The trial which ensued was - in no uncertain terms - the MOST performative in recent history, likely due to their bloodline ( the one they tried hard to reject & deny ) . The publicity from the case set the foundation, putting the Rolav heir into public prominence with the press eating up their image, chasing after their secrets, and hanging on their every word and action ( “the sweetest little killer”, tabloids sensationalized, “seems this is the chip off the old buck, isn’t it?” ) . At the end of a two-month deliberation, they were acquitted, if only because of the grace of their expert lawyer and their own performance in front of the judges. From there, it would be a chance at REHABILITATION. And when flocked by press at the end of it all, asked what they intended to do with their granted freedom, Kaen smiled and replied, “Everythin’. This is jus’ the beginnin’. I’m gonna … DO GOOD THINGS.” This, Kaen even still strives to achieve.

From there, Kaen is granted asylum with Yuna, living with her as the estate is closed and recovered, all effects secured until Kaen turns 18. With Yuna, Kaen is transferred to a different district, and a new high school, but doesn’t escape the newfound infamy. They do, however, finish off their general education with honors, graduating top of their class. And after, they confide in Yuna that they intend to pursue a career in film ( something that had always inspired them & comforted them when they were a child ) . Yuna supported the idea, and remained in their corner even when they began striking out on their own and touching base with agencies over the course of the next year or so.

By 20, Kaen is signed to a prolific agency and already finished filming for their first movie as a titular antagonist ( a role that, although their first, would become their most well-known & well-beloved ) . And today, at 26, Kaen has landed several other roles, 2 of which were primary billing spots in other films. Kaen had successfully rebounded, capitalizing off their perverted sense of fame from their trial to become an actor; the public adores them, aggrandizes them, and yet … FEARS THEM just the same. Now that their heritage ( & unstable quirk ) has gone public, people are more than a little wary of them, and Kaen has been vested with the mantle of, “THE UNTOUCHABLE DOE” , both for their image and for their power and influence; a character that no-one can get close to, that no-one can really be near enough to know in full.

Currently, Kaen’s overarching goal is to track down their clan - rather, their father - and challenge him for the right of the patriarchy ( as they believe it’s owed to them ) , to inevitably return their family “to the light” rather than allow them to live unnoticed in the shadows. However, Kaen truly does not intend to do harm, and does not intend to follow the role of villainy despite what their heritage may incline them to do; they’re not exactly the most moral of creatures, either ( especially not towards themself ) . How their story ends, how they wind up ultimately participating in the unfolding strife between villains and heroes, entirely depends on whom they interact with. So I’ve decided to leave that open-ended. But make no mistake, this entire story is a TRAGEDY, Kaen cannot be saved … Though they can be FREED.

Quirks ( yes, there’s technically 2 ) :

“ALL-FIRE” — Primary — In essence, this is a Quirk of highly potent immolation; All-Fire allows Kaen to set themself or others ablaze without the use of direct physical contact ( lit. actual pyromancy ) . Kaen’s flames are ATYPICAL of most fire-users, manifesting in an array of hues and colors all at once; it is extremely mesmerizing, but also, in practice, a pure-combustion that can incinerate a target to ash if not controlled or restrained properly. As mentioned, Kaen lacks control and even worse, lacks proper Quirk training. Because of this deficit in education, Kaen is UNABLE TO TRULY CONTROL All-Fire, nor have they ever been able to “turn it off” ever since it first manifested at 5. By 16, it continued to evolve and burn through their system unchecked, and for over a decade, Kaen has effectively been BURNING ALIVE . Although this sounds bad ( & it is ) , it comes with an upside: Kaen is impervious to being harmed by fire, full-stop, and is no longer hurt by their own flames ( they are, essentially, a walking inferno ) .

“HETEROMORPHISM : CERVIDAE CARNIVORA” — Secondary + Residual — A deeply foundational and biological Quirk that HIGHLY IMPACTS Kaen's functionality , even if it does not seem to blatantly appear physically as it does for the vast majority of their bloodline. It allots Kaen immense physical endurance , pain tolerance , animalistic instinct + drive ( note: not as a prey-based animal but a predator ) , and heightened sensory and strength. Kaen is a beast hiding in plain sight , even if they don't rightly act nor seem like one. CERVIDAE CARNIVORA grants Kaen deer-like traits ( making them seem outwardly doe-like or fauny ) while complimenting it with internalized carnivorous traits ( the instinct to hunt , the innate drive & fixation on things , a deeply rooted ferocity , etc. etc. ) .

A few notable weaknesses

Self-Restraint = / = Control — Kaen is notable for their demeanor ( composed, docile, calm even under duress ) . However, this is all external, and doesn’t at all match the internal strife they’re consistently combating; a struggle which tends to trigger “flare ups” in their fire, whether intentional or not. It’s never been a secret that Kaen isn’t trained or at all well-versed in how to properly utilize either of their Quirks, but because people - the press, coworkers, etc. - tend to see them be so openly placid, they tend to ASSUME Kaen has everything under control. This is not necessarily the case. Kaen may be able to better contain the range of damage when “accidents” happen, but that doesn’t stop them from inadvertently causing destruction or mishaps if they - at any point - lose their temper, or let their emotions get the better of them.

Water or Ground-based Quirks — Self-explanatory. However, Kaen also cannot swim. At all. Open water makes them nervous and shuts them down ( funnily enough, so does rainy weather ) .

Ice — Not necessarily because of a “weakness”, per-se, but because ice helps to “balance” or otherwise, literally, “chill out” their ever-burning Quirk by lowering the power threshold to a more manageable degree. Using ice on them would hopefully help to neutralize their fire. It’s why they take ice baths consistently.

Darkness — A primal fear. Don’t ask. It’s an easy win if you’ve got this sort of power.

Some other things of note for this verse:

Kaen is a known CELEBRITY , but also considered a civilian. They’re not entitled to use their Quirks at all ( unless for a role ) , and in fact were warned against it by the judges upon acquittal.

Kaen strives to change the narrative of their own lineage. Despite how people look at them, they are inordinately sweet-tempered, kind, and compassionate; they REFUSE to fall in line with the “nature” of their heritage ( & yet, there’s still an emptiness in them, a seething rage just waiting for an excuse to come forward ) .

Because Kaen’s All-Fire has remained constantly/consistently activated, they are regarded as one of the few and far-between case studies in LIMITLESS POTENTIAL , for their body has entirely transcended beyond all physical barriers to maintain an ever-evolving Quirk and it’s manifesting power for years at a time, without stopping.

Kaen has managed to stop their Quirk from incinerating people around them. However, they still give off an IMMENSE AURA of heat, of burning, of barely restrained fire that causes most to recoil and give them a wide berth. Their fire does, however, manifest inadvertently off and on in casual displays ( smoking from their mouth/nose, crackling cinders from their person, burning in their eyes, etc. ) .

As they are restricted from Quirk-usage, if they ever get into a scuffle with someone, they will NOT use their Quirks to fight. Hardly at all. In fact, they will openly mock anyone who uses Quirks against them, taunting them to “fight like a real man” and hit them properly ( another lesson likely learned from their upbringing, the preference for true fisticuffs compared to power-brawls ) .

Kaen has ANIMALISTIC TRAITS thanks to the recessive biological traits from their father’s lineage; sharp teeth and nails, and of course the antlers which sit broken and ungrown atop their head ( they cover these, typically, with a news-boy knit-hat ) . These traits become more prominent the more emotional they get ( re: they look more bestial ) .

Fire is often depicted as a force of DESTRUCTION , but for Kaen it becomes a conduit of RETRIBUTION & PURIFICATION . Take that as you will.

[juniperhillpatient]

random thoughts about the Kirsches because I'm obsessed with them -

I've seen the headcanons that Wayne is abusive to Ethan, I guess based on that one line about how Wayne had a special bond with his first son (Richie) but I fully reject that because it's literally not based on anything canon. Also, Ethan & Quinn both showed strong loyalty & love toward their dad as adults. There's absolutely no indication of bitterness between them & I just don't see the point of making that up when the entire thing that makes the Kirsches intriguing is their bond as a family.

I've also seen the rumors/leaks that there was at one point a reference to Wayne, Ethan & Quinn killing Mrs. Kirsch but I also fully reject that because if it doesn't make it into the final cut of the movie it's not canon & that is a HUGE plot point to just not dive into which is probably why it got cut.

I think that Wayne was a really hardworking & caring single father because to me that's what was heavily implied by the bond between Wayne, Ethan, & Quinn that we saw. They were OBVIOUSLY an extremely close family - like, codependently intensely close. We don't have canon ages for Ethan & Quinn so I love the headcanon that they were twins. Richie seems to be 2-3 years older than them & I bet they both totally looked up to & hero worshipped Richie. I feel like Richie & Quinn jokingly bullied & teased Ethan a lot but it was all in good fun, IDK Ethan just has the vibes of the sibling that gets lovingly bullied lmao

I honestly think the Kirsch's were pretty normal before Richie went down the path that he went down which makes their story way more tragic. Wayne, Quinn, & Ethan were obviously unhinged BUT they were driven to that by grief. Richie got sucked in by toxic Reddit fandom & there's no help for that but I feel like Wayne, Ethan, & Quinn were normal just maybe a LITTLE abnormally intensely close as a family until they lost Richie & it drove them insane.

I like the idea that the siblings were all extra overprotective of each other growing up & probably got into fights at school to protect each other. No one talks shit to any of them or the other two WILL knock your teeth out. This is practically canon because the main thing we know about the Kirsch siblings is that they invented being ride-or-die siblings.

I imagine that Quinn & Ethan watched their father losing sleep, getting bags under his eyes, & losing weight & meanwhile they're mourning their big brother that they loved more than anything too. I understand that Wayne is pushed as the mastermind in the fandom from what I've seen but I actually can see Quinn as the first to bring up revenge. She seems very calculated & I can see her as the one to decide this is wrong & something must be done. Maybe Quins brings it up to Ethan first & they talk it through & bring it to their dad together & Wayne is at a breaking point & he agrees & they all plot together from there.

anyway, there's nothing I love more than a toxic evil fucked-up family that is all for now <3

[destinyc1020]

Ngl When I watched some of these M&M interviews (and I say some because the press tour was giving nothing to me 🤣), JDW kinda gave me the ick with some of his answers. A mamas boy through and through...at 38

Lol I never got an "ick" vibe from him at all, but he just usually comes off as kinda bitter to me lol? 😂

I definitely get "daddy issues" vibes from him.... and I get it, maybe Denzel wasn't always there as a solid father figure while JD was growing up, cuz Denzel was always working hard in the Hollywood industry.... And I get it, you don't wanna be seen as a "nepobaby".... Like I get ALL of that lol. 😅

But yea, he def worships his mother and is kinda meh about his father in interviews rofl. I think he's made some peace with it now days though. 😊

I just think that mothers and sons...laaawwwwd... it's a special rlshp, that's all I'll say lol. 😂 Just like fathers and daughters I guess. Daddy's little princess lol 😆

But anyway, I always crack up at how Denzel was gushing over his daughter's talent and the accomplishments of his other kids, but when it got to saying smthg about John David, Denzel was like....

🤣 😂

[unveiledkinarchive]

skylar. • bodyclaim. • headcanons. • isms. 

BASIC INFO

full name — Skylar Reyes age — twenty-four gender — cis male, (he/ him/ his pronouns) orientation — homosexual occupation — student, part time tba species — dragonkin (hydrokinesis) clothing style — some days cute and pretty, others he looks like a mini jock but generally he wears whatever tf he likes

PHYSICAL INFO

face claim — Froy Gutierrez hair — brown / eyes — blue height — five foot & nine inches build — lean and fit, little too slender maybe scars — impeccable skin so, nop tattoos — his parents would have his head piercings — same as above, though he really wants a ring in his bottom lip and nose special characteristics — big ray of sunshine vibes, maybe a little lost in thought sometimes, but he does that thing where ..when he looks at you, you can't help but smile sexual preference— bottom sub

PERSONALITY

alignment — neutral good / true neutral... it shifts positive traits — ray of sunshine, excitable, joyful negative traits — insecure, cowardly, lil jealous hobbies — computers and it, gaming, swimming

MEDICAL INFO

mental — n/a physical — impeccable lil dragonbaby phobias — n/a eyesight — 18/20 dominant hand — right hand drug use — nop alcohol use — nop diet — he ...eats what he sees. and what he likes, so like almost everything

BACKGROUND

birthplace — alexandria parents — marin & hector reyes siblings — patrick, perseus, paul, peter & phillip reyes (yes) education — high school graduate -> currently student notable skills — he is a hacker, not that it ever really was of use in alexandria, but he enjoys the challenge and practices anyway

BIO

Born the youngest of six sons, Skylar grew up with a plethora of male role-models in his family, all of whom he - without a doubt, looked up to. He was close to both his brothers, but the one he felt closest to was definitely his oldest brother. Patrick. Ever since he could remember, Patrick was there for him while their father rarely was - not the way Patrick looked out for him, so the connection between them was strong. Skylar grew up wanting for nothing, especially because he was the youngest of the bunch - by far, so his father was pleased to know that if anything ever happened to his older sons, the Reyes family would still have another heir waiting in line. There was ..some pressure on him to perform well, in school and at home, but he knew that it was only for his own good, so he never quite found himself wanting to rebel. At least not in the way a typical teenager would. 

Skylar looked up to his oldest brother - almost like one would to a parent, but it was a deeper bond than the one Skylar had with his father. Patrick was the man he strived to be. Hector often sang praise in Skylar's presence and - while he felt the very subtle sting of jealousy towards his brother, he mostly just was determined to be like him one day. 

When he didn't make it into law school, he felt his world somewhat skyrocket into nirvana for a good few months. Patrick went, he became a laywer (outside of Alexandria, but still!). He’d never be the son their father hoped to have found in him, he’d never be able to be like his brother. 

So Skylar decided to be himself.

Who is Skylar Reyes? That’d be the million dollar question, but the young man was determined to find out.

Well, he was a dragon. That much he could tell, although everybody could tell as much by just ..looking at him, so he was still ..clueless. He spent all his life trying to be someone he wasn't that he lost himself somewhere along the way. It wasn't all bad, because his older brothers performing so incredibly well in life, Skylar .. had grown up with minimal pressure on him. Minimal expectations - at least from his father's side. From his own? Not quite the case. Being the youngest with his brothers all already working and living successful lives had left him in this .. place where he wanted to be done and successful himself right away, but he also didn't know what he even wanted to do with his life.

His personality could best be described as a happy, slightly reckless bundle of joy. All thanks to his oldest brother, no less. While Skylar surely was a decent back-up heir, he knew that Patrick would be the one to take over sooner or later, so Skylar pretty much got to enjoy life as it was. He went to school, he made friends, he hung out with his brothers, he crushed on an guy and felt rejection for the first time in his life and he came out stronger. His life was pretty normal despite what he was - and he liked it this way. Well, if one was to ignore his little side hobby. It wasn't like he wasn't allowed to go out, he was... but Skylar very much enjoyed the peace and quiet of his home most of the time. He found a passion for games and everything technology early on and given that he had practically endless resources at his disposal, that hobby he had .. found plenty of ammunition to keep going for a long, long time.

But he also knew the Reyes men weren’t just ..dragons, they were hunters. He remembered the time his brother came home his first hunt and ..Skylar would never forget that first night after he returned. The brother that came home after that was … changed. There was a deep sadness to him that Skylar could never quite find an explanation for, so he could only assume that it had to do with what he saw. Or did, but Patrick refused to tell him. Safe to say he was worried for the day when it was his turn. He liked himself the way he was, but he also didn’t want to disappoint their father, or let him think Skylar was weak. He might be the youngest, with quite a big age difference to his older brothers, so he’d always somewhat been coddled, but he could also look after himself and protect himself. Thanks to Patrick. 

He has no interest in taking over the family, or its businesses - nor did he want their father to tell him who he should be. He wants to fall in love, find the love of his life in a supermarket or something like that. He … wants to experience true love. And love, relationships and the like were only some of the things he wants to experience himself. The first step after graduation had been to move to out of his home, even if the Chateau still kept him pretty much in his family's vicinity, but Skylar wanted to know what it was like to live away from home - with nobody to coddle him and nobody to go easy on him when he struggled. 

Not that he’d ever not invite himself into his brother’s home for dinner, or demand attention while he was at work - or invite him and his betrothed over to the Ruthledge house for dinner… no, that wouldn’t change.

But college would grant him self-reliability among other things. Education was part of the Reyes ideology, so his father agreed without much protest and Skylar moved into one of the rooms at the Chateau... like oh so many others. He was a normal boy, see?

What he wants to do with his life? He’s got no clue, but he’ll find out eventually.

[iguinn]

hi hello I want the divorce arc deets pls 🤲 (+ whatever you wanna share! Free card to gush abt your wol!)

ok so first two very important facts:

1 - Arenvald is Berry's adoptive son and by proxy also Ilberd's adoptive son and he cares about both his adoptive dads a lot like obviously and thats important to how fucked up this was for everyone involved

2 - Berry and Ilberd werent dating before griffin griffin on the wall, everyone thought they were and they were obviously in love with each other but they werent dating so calling it divorce arc might not be accurate but its so break up/divorce vibes were calling it that anyway

ok so when all that first started they had a fight, mostly on Berry's part because Ilberd knew this would happen. he knew she would be upset enough to make a scene right there and then because it would hurt her a lot because of course it would she loves him. she said she hated him multiple times and he just took it cause he really had no right to argue back or ask her to not be mad because well he did all that well aware of how badly it would affect her emotionally and unlike in the game she was actually just removed from the premises fairly easily cause after all the yelling she was just too emotionally devastated to react to anything until she was sitting outside the city and had a crying breakdown because by the gods what was she to do now? what was she to tell her son about any of that? what could anyone tell their child in this situation? it was a shitty fucking situation for her and Ilberd too but at that point Ilberd knew all of that would hurt like a bitch he would just have to push down his feelings cause eventually it wouldnt matter anyway which was a choice on his part considering every fucking time they met after that ended in some of the most tense fucking moments of their life specially after Berry began to have her future sight dreams more and more often and it dawned on her what Ilberd was going to do and it she didnt want to tell anyone because it would get him in even more trouble but its not as if she could act as if she knew nothing about it. she would have crying fits and would ask to sleep in her father's bed because it was horrible and stressful for her. Ilberd just couldnt sleep at all for the most part during that it weighed on him at every waking moment making him unable to even rest. it was horrible emotionally for the both of them and each time they met each other after that it was horribly tense and yeah a lot of yelling happened and Berry did bring up Arenvald in an almost weaponized way to make Ilberd feel more guilty about all this shit because what he put her through? bad it sucked! but what her no THEIR son was feeling? it was worse and he should feel awful for it! (was she perhaps being too harsh? yes but u really cant blame her for being upset) and like Ilberd already felt pretty shit about hurting her and their son and that really just made it worse and he got upset and yelled back at her which is understandable, but in a way Berry knew there was nothing anyone else could do to fix the problem Ilberd wanted to fix cause no one gave enough of a fuck about it. and that hurt even more cause she knew there wasnt really nothing she could tell him to make him stop cause he also knew there was no other way. but she just wanted him to stop and come back home to her which btw she did ask him directly when she saw him in griffin outfit for the first time cause in the gayest most faggy moment they had so far she recognize him simply by the way he walked and carried himself. because thats just how gays act. but yeah a lot of nasty very parents going through a messy divorce fights going on there sometimes and well if u want al elaboration on how it traumatized Alphi and Alisaie... well theyre both very close to Berry. and we actually write them very often so they bond with Ilberd due to all three of them having lost family they deeply cared about during the calamity (partly cause we like to shove the people Berry cares about the most towards Ilberd cause Berry wants everyone she likes to get along obviously) so u can imagine what it was like for those two literal kids to see two people they cared about we were obviously having the worst fucking time of their lives get into awful fights that they both knew would lead no where just so they could pretend they had some semblance of control over their own messy feeling over this messy situation that shit stays with kids all the way to adulthood we know this as a child of divorce. they gave the twins child of divorce trauma when they arent even their parents. Arenvald got fucked up over it too! three traumatized teens in one fell swoop!

[ashmcgivern]

Having a kid is a lot of work it turns out

[autisticandroids]

anyway ok so lets talk about ruby SPECIFICALLY in my good s6 au. this ruby concept is almost the same as @lesbiansamwinchester‘s ruby lives au but has some key differences, mainly ruby doesn’t redeem herself in s5. lucifer raises her in sympathy for the devil because she really was the best of those sons of bitches and she deserves it but she spends all of s5 conflicted in her loyalties because while she really DOES want lucifer to win she is also In Love With Sam, Unfortunately, and gets more and more uncomfortable with sam being lucifer’s vessel and shit. and then she finally betrays lucifer in like, two minutes to midnight or swan song and he IMMEDIATELY kills her (very important: lucifer must already be possessing sam when this happens). then she’s brought back like. face down in a ditch 300 miles away. that’s how ruby ends season five.

anyway watch this video to set the mood. ruby stuff in season six:

- so at FIRST she is actually running around with a ragtag group of lucifer loyalist demons led by meg. meg kind of hates her for betraying lucifer for sam but also you know sam’s dead and ruby won’t do it again and most importantly they need EVERY pair of hands on board for this. so ruby is kissing huge amounts of ass mostly meg’s, like, meg is making her wait on her hand and foot in an apron. it’s comically villain homoerotic. you know. like ruby serves meg tea in a maid outfit for no other reason then as like. ridiculous humiliation that’s also intensely, weirdly horny. like the lucifer crowley dog stuff in s11. actually meg literally makes ruby wear a dog collar with a little tag that says like, “ruby. if found, please call 666 and return to owner (meg).” i cannot stress enough that this is just STUPID horny for NO reason. you guys know what i mean. it’s basically sorority hazing but up to eleven because demons, and also forever. also meg makes ruby kiss her hand at least once. or like no she makes her kiss her boot. i am having too much fun i’ve gotten distracted.

- ruby finds out sam is alive and immediately ditches. like she just fucks off to nowhere and they can’t figure out where she went. anyway this samruby reunion takes place like, before the first episode definitely, maybe a few months.

- i do like @lesbiansamwinchester‘s thing where ruby tries very hard to be sam’s moral compass but also imo she fucks up, very bad, and a lot. and soulless sam can’t really catch her at it so they end up doing a lot of very fucked shit actually. but she tries very hard because she cares about sam and she wants him to think well of himself y’know. and she wants to be someone who sam would think was worth following.

- re: that last point. many thoughts. head full.

- when sam and dean finally see each other again ruby is there and dean is like what the FUCK. like he did see that she betrayed lucifer for sam at the last minute but also he hates her and doesn’t trust her, and he actually kind of suspects that whatever’s wrong with sam might actually be HER fault. 

- this post is relevant.

- okay but i’ve decided that the cas/meg kiss DOES in fact happen in this au because i do kind of love it and also more importantly, with the addition of the insane meg being ruby’s shitty ex vibe that i am jamming into this au with both hands, it is just. chefkiss. ruby and dean look at each other in horror while sam is just like huh? i’m sorry but imagine being ruby and being forced to watch your horrible ex get kissed dommily by castiel. god this is funny i love this. again this is all in subtext because we are imagining cw censors and i’ve used up my one allotted gay kiss for the season by having anna make out with a random woman at an orgy to prove that all angels are degenerate pansexual hedonists, you know. (is this homophobic enough for the cw? i hope so!) also: an orgy which balthazar organized and cas refused to attend, to be clear. 

- dean is actually garbage enough about the whole ruby thing that sam and ruby fuck off by themselves for a good while like, maybe three or four episodes, leaving dean alone or sometimes with cas. during this time dean gets a little bit involved with the angel revolutionaries.

- anyway when sam gets his soul back he’s like, torn, between dean and ruby. he feels guilty for how he behaved towards and thought about dean but he would ALSO feel guilty just kicking ruby to the curb.

- HOWEVER when he gets his soulless memories back he does kick her to the curb because she has done some REALLY fucked up shit while trying to be his moral compass like she is BAD at it.

- once ruby is left all alone in the world, guess who shows up in a flutter of wings and ambiguity! it’s anna! 

- she is here to ask ruby if she wants to spy on hell for the angel revolution. ruby accepts because everyone else hates her right now. if anna wants to take her in under cas’ banner (and not tell the winchesters because they’re technically on the same side but what’s a little subterfuge between friends) ruby will take it.

- ruby and anna DO get to have some fun agent runner/agent lesbian subtext, as a treat! at least when anna isn’t busy eating food out of lisa braeden’s fridge like villanelle and other nuts things. 

- like i do wanna be clear anna just. appears in lisa braeden’s kitchen, slowly, wordlessly eats her leftovers while staring her down, and then flies away. this contributes to lisa’s impending mental breakdown. MY season six is about the madness of the suburban housewife, among many other various things.

- also i want to be clear that raphael’s side is actually like, funneling weapons to the lucifer loyalist demons to try and get them to defeat crowley but it’s all very hush hush, like, raphael would NOT want his underlings to know that he has organized this, like, they can barely stand to work with naomi. the fact that raphael had naomi organize help for DEMONS is unthinkable. anyway it’s basically celestial iran-contra.

- ruby is actually one of the last people to stick by cas even when like, anna and balthazar are betraying him, because like. whomst among us has never wanted to become god a little. and also, ruby is weak to authority figures we KNOW this she might be down to accept cas as her heavenly father a little, she’s NOT a rebel. but most importantly she sticks by him because, you know, i love sam and he’s mad at me for kinda betraying him and you [REDACTED] dean and he’s mad at you for kinda betraying him like we’re all winchester derangement syndrome patients here, and also like. i get it. sometimes they don’t know what’s good for them. sometimes in order to love you have to betray a little bit.

- ruby doesn’t turn on cas until he breaks sam’s wall. but by then it’s too late and there’s nothing she can do really.

- the parallel where it was dean who stabbed ruby in lucifer rising and it’s sam who stabs cas in the man who knew too much is actually intentional this time and WAY more aggressive. actually there are tons of cas-ruby parallels. i think meg should call ruby a whore like one episode before crowley calls cas a whore just to hammer it home. i think the thing where soulless sam runs away from dean’s judgement and is running around with ruby while dean is sulking about it but also running around with cas is super aggressively obvious. god i love that ruby’s existence makes it super obvious that cas is dean’s [REDACTED]. that’s so fun. 

- this has been an intensely hypertextual romp and it’s apparently nearly fifteen hundred words, good god. anyway, special thanks to @lesbiansamwinchester, @pietacastiel, and @seragamble, all of whom brainstormed with me

[binch-i-might-be]

it has been a while since I have liveblogged!

ALEX AS A CHILD OMG

alright, James square up :) 🔪

I hope he dies of alcohol poisoning

BABY ALEX!

this is breaking my heart so badly :((

OH MY GOD I AM GOING TO KILL JAMES HE'S SO INFURIATING YOU FUCKING BITCH I WILL LITERALLY BURN YOU ALIVE

Alexander had learned to cry quietly a long time ago, and it still hurt her heart to contemplate that. He was four years old. A toddler, basically.

I will skewer James YOU FUCKING BITCH YOU ABSOLUTE ABOMINATION I WILL DESTROY YOU

sorry it is 4am and I am angry

he...HE WALKED AWAY?? JUST?? LIKE?? THAT?? WHAT

did James hurt him? DID THAT FUCKER LAY A HAND ON ALEX

HE'S A TINY CHILD HOLY FUCK

There is nothing I hate more than child abusers. How do you look at a child, a small helpless human, and hurt them?

fuck you James

She could see individual fingers. Pressed into her son's skin, and she could imagine it all too well, James grabbing him in a rage, dragging him across the flat by his arm as Alex cried quietly and let him, not that there had been anything else to do for the poor boy. He was just a child, and small for his age on top of that.

Hello, CPS?

No, but seriously what the fuck???? I babysit my baby cousins often and one of them is 4 and I can't imagine ever laying a hand on them like this. They're small tiny humans completely relying on us for everything. What is wrong with him.

Her sweet little boy would grow up, thinking it was fine and ordinary for people who were supposed to care about him to harm instead.

But he won't and I am so fucking glad for that

"Why, um." He sniffled, and those clever, so curious eyes–his father's eyes, good Lord, she remembered his eyes so well–misted over with fresh tears. "Why does daddy hate me?"

This line broke me. If you need me I will be lying in a ditch somewhere

IT'S THE EYES! THE FUCKING EYES

because he's a horrible human, Alex.

HE'S FOUR HE'S A BABY I AM GOING TO KILL SOMEONE

Rachel, you can't blame yourself for this. It's not your fault

"I'll never become mean like daddy, Maman. I promise," he said and blinked up at her from wide eyes, and Rachel's throat closed up.

I am not crying I am fine.

I need a second. or two. I am also hungry but it's 4 30am so I'll have to cook if I want something

ANYWAY, THIS WAS SO GOOD THE ANGST THE GUILT THE BABY I LOVE THIS SO MUCH I LOVE LOVE LOVE CHILD ALEX CONTENT!!!

Do you think you'd make more baby Alex content? Maybe with the Washingtons after they take him in?

This was amazing!!!! SO AMAZING!!!! take care of yourself!

ahhh welcome back :))

LITTLE BABY CHILD!!

honestly that would be so sexy of him. just to fucking die of liver failure ❤️

baby boy :(

this is the energy we need here. James Hamilton fucking DIE IN A DITCH CHALLENGE

you're absolutely correct tho he needs to have his dick cut off or something. murder violence arson ect!

oh yeah that's inspired by me running away at all times! Alex is my special little neurodivergent baby and he gets distracted very easily <33

yeah :((((

right??? I don't even like children but I'll never understand how you can just. PUNT A CHILD?? GIRL THEY'RE TINY CREATURES THEIR BONES ARE BRITTLE AND THEIR SOULS SQUISHY :(

Alex grows up to have a husband who would backflip into hell and kill satan for him and that is SO SEXY and EXACTLY WHAT HE DESERVES

literally he's just a little guy :( baby :( why would anyone hate this sweet tiny angel child :(

also YEAH IT'S THE EYES!!!!

Alex will become Best Man just because he PROMISED his MAMAN. sweet darling <3

THANK YOU I LOVE ANGST AND GUILT BUT MOST OF ALL I LOVE THE BABY!!!!! I've been experiencing so much baby Alex brainrot these past few days so it was really only a matter of time until he made an appearance :)

I really don't know! I mean I'm not opposed, but what I write depends entirely on vibes haha, so perhaps!

[kikyan]

Yandere Ao Bing (Nezha: Reborn 2021)

These are my interpretations of his persona and none of these are 100% accurate. I don’t condone any of these actions in real life and all of this is purely fictional. 

These are for a friend but I also wanted to post them here as well. I saw the film, but I was washing dishes while watching so let’s hope something stayed in my noggin. Anyway, these will also include personal headcanons that I made about his character based on the movie, so nothing has been confirmed at least so far. Let’s roll on with them, the type of yandere I see him as is possessive, manipulative, and sadistic. 

Throughout the movie, he literally radiates obnoxious rich kid vibes, like you knew this motherfucker was planning something and he was going to be a spoiled brat. Well, we were PARTIALLY right but it turns out that this man has some serious daddy issues. He happens to meet the MC ( Li Yunxiang) and compliments his bike with the intention of taking it or unleashing his superiority. He then tries to get his bike and one thing leads to the next, Li is revealed as Nezha and now Ao Bing has some desire to get back at him. His dad takes care of everything, never telling his son anything yet expecting him to cooperate with everything. He does it to protect his son, but in reality he is doing it to protect his ambitions and dreams. Maybe he did care for Ao Bing, but he didn’t show it as much, rather he tried to give freedom to his son while controlling and manipulating him. 

Possessive. The quote that my friend goes wild for, “If I want it, it’s mine.” Aight no explanation needed literally just this quote-jk. The thing with his behavior is that he is so used to taking things rather than earning them, that he would do the same for his S/O. His S/O is his and he isn’t sharing, their time is his and no one else's. He will keep tabs on them at all times, if he isn’t present expect a guard somewhere nearby watching them. Calling at random times to see what they’re doing or even picking them up and taking them some other place. You’re someone he wouldn’t trade the world for, I honestly think he would do anything to keep his S/O with him but still earning his father’s love which is where the sadism and manipulation comes from. 

Manipulation. The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree with this one, he is very arrogant and stubborn. He doesn’t take no for an answer and will probably tell it to you straight as opposed to his father who prefers the silent but deadly method with a hint of patience. Think of a chessboard, his father is the one calculating the moves with precision depending on his opponent and Ao Bing is the one who does that, but gets really frustrated with the game and starts moving the pieces illogically resulting in you getting your ass handed to you. He would use a more physical approach with either fits or threats. Threaten you or your family, your safety or theirs’s is not guaranteed. The type to bring out a weapon and show off all the creepy yet interesting shit about them with the hopes of trying to keep you in your place. It’s more of the controlling blunt type. 

Sadistic, to some degree. Whether that’s how you roll or not, physical punishments are kinda something he specializes in. You’re misbehaving? Yeah, he would come and put you in your place, but here is the kicker. I think that he hates violence, but because he was born with it that’s the only thing he knows. When he is fighting Nezha, his father tells him to retreat but he chooses not to. There you can see that Ao Bing is really hesitant about doing anything, but looking at his father’s leave with that expression really does something to you. No need for words, simply seeing and letting your mind run wild by telling you what’s happening is enough. He was raised with precision and his father was strict. Never made his dad proud but he is trying a lot. He didn’t want to fight Nezha, but he also didn’t want to disappoint his father. It is mentioned that he has his own goals and ideas, he has freedom but his father has a hold on him that he isn’t willing to part with. 

Danger level? 6 or 7/10. It’s mental instability for me. He is very brash and arrogant because of the way he was raised and that takes time to reprogram. His father has a hold on him even now so you can expect him to listen to his father. In my eyes, his S/O is someone who saw past all that or is willing to get to know him past all his fame and riches. Someone who doesn’t expect much but also recognizes his talents. His S/O acted out of line he wouldn’t hesitate to threaten or do something to them, but he certainly will attempt to apologize afterward. Tread carefully, his father is a prominent figure in his life and will also dictate yours, get rid of Daddy and you get Ao Bing who is willing to change with nothing holding him back. 

[chan-skz]

Going back the way we've come

Pairing : Hwang Hyunjin x Fem!Reader

Summary: You didn't want to go, but forced by your parents, you gave in. Your relationship with Hyunjin hadn't started very well, after reuniting years later, you realized that a lot of things had changed. but for some reason, you couldn't push him away.

Words: ~ 7.5k

Genre: Fluff, smut (around the end), slight angst

Warning(s): Making out, Oral (f receiving), Fingering, Kinda raw language, Semi-public, Light choking, Light overstimulation, Teasing under table

Note: This is part of the christmas collab I'm doing w/ @hanflix and many other writers. I tried my best to give it a holiday vibe, but I guess I totally failed hahah.

A/N: This is the longest fic I've ever written for now, and I also tried my best in writing it, so I really hope you'll enjoy it! English isn't my first language, so I'm really sorry if there's any mistakes or non-senses.

Your fingers tightened around the collar of your coat, the cold breeze gently hitting your face. You cursed yourself for not having listened to your mother when she insisted for you to take a scarf, arguing that it would be colder than usual.

"Fuck winter." You said when you got back under the shelter of the bus stop, collapsing on the bench next to your bestfriend, where he was sitting.

"Hi to you too, Y/n." Jisung laughed.

"Sorry, really not in a good mood." You said, glancing around, noticing that besides you, there were few other people waiting for the bus.

"Do you want to talk about it though?" He continued.

"Well." You began, sitting correctly on the seat and turning to him, announcing your long speech in advance. He knew you by heart. "I argued with my mom about a stupid decision she and my dad made. They want me to spend Christmas Eve with them and some old friends of theirs! Do you realize that? I don't even know them! She told me they had a son of my age and that I was bestfriend with him when I was younger, as that would some how change my mind. Christmas is supposed to be between families, not strangers."

"Are you done?" He asked when he saw you cross your arms against your chest and sigh even more on the bench. He was really trying to keep from laughing at your despondency. "It's not funny Sungie! I'm really serious!" You complained. "How did I found myself having to spend almost a boring evening with complete strangers?"

"You could come and spend it with me if you really don't want to spend it with your parents' friends." He suggested.

"Are you serious?" You asked, suddenly straightening up, hope shining in your eyes.

"Will your parents accept, though?" He raised an eyebrow.

"No." Your mother firmly refused.

"But why!" You whined through the phone, kicking your foot at the pile of snow in front of you, in frustration

"Because Christmas should be celebrated with the family, honey."

"Family.. We don't even pass it between real family." You whispered to yourself, rolling your eyes, before setting your gaze on your best friend who was still waiting for you at the entrance of the high school.

"It's not the same thing!" She exclaimed loudly through the phone, forcing you to move your phone away from your ear. "Do you really want to stay with them on Christmas Eve anyway?"

"But Jisung offered it to me! He even told me that his parents wouldn't even mind!" You exclaimed in your turn. "You yourself know how much they love me!" You added in hope that it will change her mind.

"It's still no, the discussion is closed." She concluded, before hanging up on you. You sighed in frustration, kicking one last on the snow pile before turning back to your best friend. You weren't in the mood it was clear.

"So?" Jisung asked as you approached him.

"She said no." You answered, walking past him to enter the school. "But don't worry, I'm going to keep pushing when I get home, she says the discussion is over, but I'll keep pushing the subject."

"You really don't want to spend it with their friends, do you?" Jisung chuckled when he saw how persistent you were.

"As they say, perseverance always pays off." You gave him a smile, letting him know you weren't going to drop the case that easily.

"Yeah, but I don't think that's gonna work." Before you could answer, a group of girls down the hall caught your eye. You glanced at each other in disbelief as you approached your group of friends.

"What's going on over there." You asked curiously, as you opened your locker to deposit your things in.

"Ah, just a new student." Jeongin just shrugged, not looking away from his phone, too focused on his game.

"Damn, he's this special to create so much enthusiasm." You continued, taking your books in your arms before closing your locker and leaning against it.

"I heard he was handsome, rich, tall. The pure cliché you know." Changbin added, earning amused looks from all of you. "What? I only rehearsed what I heard, I didn't even saw the guy yet."

"My only question is who would get transfered to a new school a day before winter break? It's so unlikely." You were curious to know who this new kid was, since he already had girls at his feet when it's barely been a day since he arrived.

"I really don't know." Changbin shrugged. "But I also heard he was from your hometown. You must know him."

"No luck, I don't even remember a lot of things from back there." You were still a little surprised that he also came from your hometown, but despite all that, it didn't change your opinion of him.

"Merry Christmas!" Felix came out of nowhere, dressing ridiculously in rudolph. Totally his type. You couldn't help but burst out laughing at his outfit. The day before, you all had agreed to dress in a holiday theme, but it was clear that someone surely hadn't understood the real concept.

"What the fuck, Lix." Jeongin said, finally turning his attention away from his game to judge his friend. "When I suggested yesterday that we could dress like it was Christmas, I didn't actually mean to dress up like this."

You kinda felt bad for Felix as he looked disappointed at the judgment of the youngest.

"Rah, you are so boring." Felix said, crossing his arms over his chest before pretending to sulk.

"Okay, pass me your red nose." You added, rolling your eyes as Felix's face lit up.

"It's good now?" You asked rhetorically, placing the red ball on yours.

"Looks like a real clown now. Your makeup wasn't enough, but with that nose you really look like one now." Jisung said amused, making the whole gang laugh, except you obviously.

"I swear to you that one day I'll kill you." You threatened him, hitting his forearm causing him to whine in pain.

"Ow- damn you hit real hard-"

"Y/n? Y/n Y/l/n?" A familiar voice called you out, making everyone turn around. You then suddenly found yourself facing a guy that neither of you knew. You surely assumed to be the new student.

"Excuse me, do I know you?" You had to admit that the fact that this tall guy knew your name freaked you out.

"Don't you recognize me? Hyunjin. We went to the same elementary school." The so-called Hyunjin indicated, making you frown at his words. But your brain still didn't seem to recognize him despite how hard you tried to remember who it could be.

"I'm so sorry, but you must be wrong on the person. I really don't know you." This time you raised an eyebrow and looked him over from head to toe. You couldn't deny that he was handsome, even though you didn't know him.

"He's from your hometown, there's a chance he's right." Chris pointed, once the guy had left. You sigh in exasperation. "I don't remember him anyway. So whether he's right or not, it doesn't really matter."

You threw yourself on your bed, almost screaming into your pillow in frustration. Again, you tried to convince your parents, but it was a complete failure like this morning. They were really determined that you go with them, even though you had made it clear to them that you didn't want to. You spent long minutes looking at your reflection through the mirror in your bathroom. Did you have to wear a dress and full makeup to go to a stupid Christmas dinner? Obviously, it was your mother who forced you.

The red dress she chose for you was quite tight and followed every curve of your body. But it was either that or nothing, since you would've been allowed to wear something more comfortable. Everything had to be perfect, you rolled your eyes recalling the words of your mother, and also of your father. You didn't understand either why you had agreed to wear high heels, your feet were hurting horribly and the freezing winter cold really didn't help your situation. It was snowing and you were forced to wear these heels anyway, that's how your parents exaggerated. Luckily, there was no ice, otherwise you would've tripped and humiliated yourself in the middle of the entrance. You were torn from your thoughts when the front door opened, and revealing a quite beautiful lady about your mother's age.

"Y/m/n!" The lady exclaimed with a big smile, softly giggling as your mother returned the same energy to her. She wasted no time to make you get in and hugging your mom and shaking your father's hand. Once you got in her facial expression only lit up even more.

"Y/n! Woah, you've grown so much!" She indicated by taking you in your arms too. "You've become so beautiful, I'm sure Hyunjin would agree." She said with a slight smirk. Hearing his name made you choke on your own saliva. You tensed, but managed to fake a smile, even though you were praying inside that you had misheard. Unfortunately for you, all your doubts were confirmed when you walked into the living room and found yourself face to face with Hyunjin.

"Damnit.." You cursed under your breath, when you came to sit on the couch in front of his and according to the face he expressed, he seemed to have heard you. Lucky for you, none of the other adults next to you seemed to have heard it. You could feel his intense gaze on you, and it lowkey made you anxious.

"Dinner's not ready yet, because we got too caught up at the last minute, so sorry." Hyunjin's mother laughed lightly. "I know the kids won't want to wait here all along, so maybe they could go do something else until it's ready."

If you could think that the night couldn't get any worse, you were completely wrong.

"Stop following me." Hyunjin suddenly turned as he walked up the stairs. Making you roll your eyes.

"I 'follow' you, because I have nowhere else to go and I would rather stay with you than stay with them for a second. Their 'good old days' really don't interest me." You crossed your arms against your chest, defying him with your gaze.

"Whatever." He rolled his eyes, before turning around. His room was quite large, almost double yours. You made sure to sit in the opposite side of the room. You then found yourself sitting on the sofa while he was lying on his bed, both phones in hand. Your phones keep you busy, making you forget the awkward tension.

"How could you not recognize me?" Hyunjin suddenly asked, distracting you from the video you were watching.

"Do I really have to?" You looked away from your phone to focus on Hyunjin, who was now sitting on the edge of the bed and facing you.

"Did I change that much?" He said, letting out an exasperated sigh.

"We knew each other when we were kids, now we are adults, what do you expect? I can't recognize everyone I was friends with in my childhood at one glance." You said in a mocking voice. "I don't even understand why you keep pushing so hard for me to remember you, but if you really want to, just show me what you looked like when you were a baby. It would surely refresh my memory."

You didn't expect that he would actually do it. But your eyes widened when you saw the little boy in the picture. You recognized him right there. Your heart pounded at the realization, but you tried to pull yourself together. It was stupid to react so exaggeratedly just because you realized you were facing your childhood best friend, your first love. Finally you didn't really know if when you were young you really loved him, because after all, you were still kids, the meaning of love wasn't real known, nor understood.

"Stop Hyunjin, you're hurting him!" You yelled at him to let go of your friend's sweater, Chris.

"No! How dare he touch you! Only I have the right to give you a hug!" Hyunjin frowned, looking at you before quickly looking back at your friend, who just let it go, finding his jealousy quite ridiculous.

"But I was the one who gave him a hug." You started, finding his possessiveness frustrating.

You couldn't help but have a small smile forming at the corner of your lips at the flashback of this event. And you couldn't control your teasing.

"So how's your jealousy? Are you still so possessive of a temper?" You said amused, expecting him to becomes slightly shy and sulky as you pointed out his toxic trait, but what you didn't expect was for him to smile and look down on you.

"Oh, why do you want to know that? Unless you want me to show you what true possessiveness is." He smirked, looking you up and down. Your own smile faded as he watched you closely, making you feel oddly exposed to him in that tight, cropped dress.

"What do you mean?" You pulled yourself together again and asked, raisong an eyebrow.

"Well, I wouldn't have thought you would've had so many guy friends." His comment frustrated you for some reasons. After years apart, as soon as you meet again does he really have to get jealous over the fact that you have a lot of opposite sex friends? You really didn't like it.

"Does it even matter anyway?" You asked insistently. At your reaction, Hyunjin's expression changed, becoming more nonchalant again.

"Nevermind." He got up from the sofa he was leaning on and went to lie back on his bed. You took advantage of him not looking at you to detail him. You couldn't deny that puberty had blessed him, making him not only beautiful, but also extremely attractive. His hair, which he had dyed blond, was slightly messy, but enough to make it look quite classy.

"Do you like staring at me?" He asked rhetorically, but as you were about to deny, he continued. "No need to deny it, the trickle of drool at the corner of your mouth is proof of that."

Seeing your panicking face, he laughed out loud. Quickly running your hand over the corner of your mouth, you finally realized that he was only messing with you from the start. As you opened your mouth to clap back at him, you heard your mother's voice calling you from downstairs, informing both of you that the dinner was ready. Hyunjin didn't miss the glare you gave him as you sat face to face at the dining table. He could've simply ignored it, but the little smirk that appeared on your lips worried him slightly. He had a bad feeling.

Your parents were talking and laughing with each other, paying almost no attention to you two, which gave you the best opportunity to tease Hyunjin. For his part, he was frustered when he felt something caress his leg. Looking down he saw your foot caressing his leg, he wasted no time pushing you away, finding the whole thing quite inappropriate as you found yourself at the table with both of your parents. But you didn't give up, in fact you were determined to make him restless. You restarted your gesture, but this time, taking advantage of his man spread, you deflected your touching on his crotch. You knew he was going to lose his temper at this action and your doubts were confirmed when he jumped at the feeling of your heel pressing against his crotch.

"Hyunjin, are you okay?" His mother asked, slightly worried. You could see a pinkish tinge forming on Hyunjin's cheeks and you had to admit he was so cute like that.

"And yes, y-yes. It's okay, I just banged my knee against the table, sorry." He managed to convince the others. After all, he wasn't going to openly say that you were touching his dick under the table. Stop that, he mimicked, his gaze changing dramatically to become more firmer, but it only made you keep going, finding his reaction funny and extremely entertaining. Suddenly he got up from the table, apologizing to your parents and pretending he wasn't hungry, so he could get away from that family dinner. Not wanting to be alone with them, you did the same, sighing in relief when you in turn managed to sneak out of that Christmas dinner. Except you weren't expecting to be tackled by a pretty angry Hyunjin from the moment you stepped into his room. You then found yourself stuck between him and the wall, his arms placed on each side of your body, blocking you from escaping from his grip. Besides his tall figure, which made him quite intimidating, didn't help your case.

"If you were so desperate for my cock, you should've told me." He said in a dangerously calm voice.

"What are you talking about?" You manage to say, completely confused.

"Oh don't be innocent. You really think this is a game, don't you? Do you think teasing my cock around our parents is fun?" You bit your lip and your eyes widened when he grabbed your hand and put it on his bulge for you to feel it, which was quite hard.

"You feel it? Now I'm fucking hard." He said in a long sigh of pleasure, feeling your fingers trace his length. He then leaned against your ear, his hot breath giving you chills.

"From the moment I met you again, I knew straight away that I didn't want to just be friends with you." You still couldn't quite assimilate the situation you currently found yourself in and it was only when he leaned against your ear to whisper those words to you with his deep voice that you finally broke out of your thoughts. Suddenly you pushed him away, forcing him to pull away from you and step back. He looked at you completely lost, not understanding your sudden action and to tell the truth, you didn't understand what had taken you neither. You couldn't deny that this whole situation had made you slightly aroused, but it was too soon. No sooner had you met again than you already found yourself doing dirty things? It was going a little too fast for your liking.

"That-that won't work, I'm so sorry." You avoided his gaze in embarrassment. After a few moments of silence, you finally returned your gaze to Hyunjin, who was now looking at you completely detached. And to be honest, his expression hurted you, but you tried to hide it. You knew you ruined your evening, that's why you decided to end up speanding it with your parents. It was quite boring, but at least it allowed you to escape the discomfort that would've been present between you and Hyunjin, if you stayed with him.

"And? What did you do?" Jisung asked excitedly. A few days later, you had wasted no time summoning Jisung, your best friend, to tell him what had happened to you. But no sooner had the story started than he was already feeling excited, obviously expecting you and Hyunjin to have done it.

"I pushed him away." You simply said, looking as if you didn't care about it. Even though a few days later, you were still mentally slapping yourself for pushing him away so coldly. While deep down, you wished things had turned out differently.

"What did you do?" Jisung repeated slowly, his excitement fading.

"I pushed him away and even told him that it wouldn't work between us." You closed your eyes, anticipating his reaction.

"Oh my god, I have never known a girl so stupid." Jisung said in exasperation. "You literally had the chance before you and you didn't even take it."

"I know!" You pouted. "It's just that I realized this when it was too late. I was in the living room with my parents, you really expected me to go back to his room and take back everything that I said and did to him?"

You concluded ironically before crossing your arms against your chest and sighing in exasperation.

"Well that was an option that you unfortunately didn't take and which could've prevented from finding yourself in this situation." He dramaticallyraised his hot chocolate cup to face, making you roll your eyes.

"I'm seriously starting to regret telling you this story and even offering to go out. You really aren't helping me."

"It's too hard not to judge you when you literally make so many stupid decisions, sorry." He said, chuckling at your annoyed reaction. "Ah, by the way, I almost forgot to mention it, but Changbin is throwing a new year party tomorrow and he told me to force you to come."

At the mention of a party, you whined. You didn't like parties, you preferred to stay at home, doing nothing, rather than partying among people you didn't know.

"Tell him back that despite you forcing me, I'm not coming." You said directly.

"Please, for once come on. And it'll help you to forget about your night with Hyunjin." Jisung begged you. It was very rare that you attended parties organized by your friends, one because you didn't like the vibe, but you also didn't understand the usefulness of getting high and drunk. But coming to think of it, not only did you want to forget the shit you had caused, but you also felt like getting wasted.

"Fine."

You scrambled through the room, the wave of dancing people glued to each other began to make you sick. Your glass in hand, you passed through all these people, until you finally got off the dance floor. You shiver slightly when you feel the light cold breeze brush your exposed legs. You were already regretting having put on such a short dress. It wasn't really ideal to go out so exposed, but it was the only evening dress you had.

"Looks like you're bored." Felix's deep voice surprised you, making you jump.

"Oh my god!" You exclaimed in surprise. almost dropping your drink. "You scared me."

You hit his forearm, making him laugh out loud.

"No, but seriously you look really bored." He said, calming down. You just nodded, it was true that you were slowly starting to regret coming. Your dress that bothered you, the alcohol that took too long to hit you, and the cold freezing were all the reason of it.

"Do you want to come with me play truth or dare? Changbin and the other boys were organizing it." He proposed to you, not failing to see you looking with disgust at the gathering of people completely wasted and grinding on each other. You accepted, telling yourself that it might change your mind. You didn't know this kind of game was still being played at parties, but you were curious enough what kind of dares and truths other players will throw themselves into. Obviously, you should've expected to see Hyunjin as soon as you set a foot in the room, which seemed to be Changbin's room, accompanied by Felix. Other than this one, Hyunjin and even Changbin, you didn't really know the other participants, but even then you cursed yourself for not thinking for a second that Hyunjin might be there too. You blushed slightly when you noticed him contemplating your body shamelessly. You thanked the lord for making the room a little dark, only a lamp on the floor on the floor litening the room.

"Y/n!" Changbin exclaimed with joy when he saw you, glad you came. Coming to hug you, only to ruffle your hair.

"Stop." You giggled. "You ruined my hairstyle." You pouted.

"Ohh, it's okay, you're beautiful the way you are." He said, making you blush. Changbin treated you like his little sister, his way to make you comfortable no matter the situation would always surprise you. Your interaction didn't go out of Hyunjin's attention. From the corner of the room he watched you silently, paying no attention to the girl beside him who was desperately seeking his attention.

"Are we starting or not?" Felix complained loudly, drawing attention to himself.

"We're just waiting for Jisung and Jeongin." No sooner had Changbin finished his sentence than your two friends entered the room, their arms laden with drinks.

"To spice up the game!" Jisung exclaimed as he placed the bottles on the ground, beside the circle you had formed. You had hesitated for a moment to sit down, your short dress really bothering you, obviously you didn't want others to have an easy view of your panties. You were then offered by Changbin his jacket to cover your lap, clearly having noticed your struggle.

"Thank you." You smiled at him, before kneeling on the floor and covering your legs with his jacket.

"Ok, we all know the game rules, right? But this time, if you don't want to answer the truth or don't want to do a dare, you're going to have to take two shots of vodka." Jeongin vaguely explained. "Okay, I'm starting."

He leaned over to spin the bottle, stopping in front of Changbin.

"Truth or dare." Jeongin asked with a smirk at the corner of his lips. It was in those moments that his inner devil was coming out.

"Truth." Changbin said. "I don't trust you enough to pick dare when it comes to you." He added suspiciously.

"What's your body count?" Jeongin asked, ignoring his friend's comment.

"Do I need to have slept with them?" He asked, waiting for the clarification of the younger. He took time to think.

"Then I think around 15, if not even more." He nodded. Hearing this number, you almost choked.

"15?! What the hell?!" You turned to Changbin, your eyes widening. "You better spill the tea, mr.Don Juan."

The game went on, you had to admit it was pretty funny seeing some people taking two shots of vodka and gradually get drunk just because they didn't want to do something, or even see some people do of ​​stupid things. Well, until Hyunjin's turn came and he had the misfortune of being told what to do by Jisung.

"Truth or dare, Hyunjin." He asked him with a smile, which the world that didn't know him might consider innocent, but knowing him very well, you knew he was up to no good.

"I guess, dare?" He answered.

"I dare you to make out for a minute with the girl you find the most attractive in the room." As soon as Jisung's words came out of his mouth, his turned gaze to you. You rolled your eyes when you had eye contact with your best friend. Seeing how the girl, who was sitting next to Hyunjin, looked quite pretty and looked so interested in him, you expected him to turn to kiss her. But you were a little taken aback, when he got up to approach you to kneel down in front of you, ignoring the complaints of the girl you think was one of his fangirls at school.

"Wait what?" Your eyes widened, completely lost. Your heart quickly started race up as you saw him lean towards you.

"Can I kiss you?" He asked quietly. You really didn't know what to add, you were literally wordless. Subconsciously, you started to nod your head gently, giving him your consent. When your lips touched, it was as if no one existed around you. The exclamations of surprise that other people around you were expressing went over your head.

Hyunjin's lips were soft, the kiss you exchanged was initially passionate, but the longer the seconds passed the hotter it got. Without thinking too much, you wrapped your arms around the older man's neck, pulling him closer to you, as he grabbed your hips. Too absorbed in each other, you hadn't noticed that the minute had already passed and it was only when Jisung called you out that you finally came out of your reverie, instantly detaching yourself from Hyunjin.

You blushed slightly when you felt a light trickle of drool dripping from the corner of your mouth, you pressed to wipe it off quickly with the back of your hand. Hyunjin, for his part, just licked his lips, giving you a smirk, knowing that this action would destabilize you even more. Clearing your throat afterwards, you for sure wanted to divert the attention others had on you, while Hyunjin, sat down next to you with a big smile on his face, not caring that all the attention was on you. After all he had finally kissed you, which he had wanted to do since the dinner with your parents, so nothing else mattered. Your thoughts wandered elsewhere as the game continued its course. You couldn't think of anything other than Hyunjin's lips on yours, his kiss had made you lose your head. Your mind was engulfed in unhealthy thoughts and it didn't take you long before you felt yourself being drowned by your own mind.

"I-I think I'm going to go." You huffed, feeling a pleasant, but quite uncomfortable heat growing between your legs. You were clearly starting to feel bad. You didn't give Changbin or Hyunjin time to speak as you got up and quickly left the room. The loud sound of the music playing backwards was much more audible once in the hallway, it's precisely at this moment that you could gradually feel the influence of alcohol washing you off. Luckily for you, you found the bathroom easily.

"Y/n?" You heard Hyunjin calling you, but you didn't pay him any attention to him when he hesitantly walked in. You were propped up against the bathroom counter, staring at your reflection through the mirror, it was easily recognizable that you were not feeling well. Your cheeks were red, your breath quickened and your eyes slightly narrowed.

"Are you okay?" He asked worriedly, approaching you, but he resigned himself when he saw you stepping back when he tried to come closer.

"Stop playing with me." You finally said, turning to face him. You couldn't help but slightly laugh bitterly when he looked at you in confusion, obviously not understanding the meaning of your words.

"Seriously Hyunjin, what do you want from me." You rolled your eyes, "You tell me straight up that you want more than just a friendship with me, when it had only been one evening that we met again. Things have changed Hyunjin, I've changed, you've changed. We're not the same as when we were still children." He was silent for a moment, looking deep in his thoughts, before he resigned himself to saying something.

"I understand that we are no longer children. And from the moment I saw you again I understood it very well. You must think I'm talking nonsense, but just seeing you and talking to you again last time, I don't know why, i had the same feelings i had when we were young."

He stopped talking to approach you slowly, making sure first that you weren't going to distance yourself from him.

"I'm very serious. I'm really not trying to play with your feelings, nor you in general." His gaze reflected a slight sadness. He was genuinely afraid of being rejected by you, even after his speech.

"How could I believe you?" You asked, hesitantly whether you should take him seriously or not.

"If you give me a chance, I swear I could prove it to you." You felt butterflies in your stomach at his words. You opened your mouth to say something, but closed it immediately, you really didn't know what to say. And he looked pretty determined.

"I hope you're not going to make me regret it then." You manage to say. At your answer, his face lit up. He was anxious that you would reject him, that you would tell him that his 'confession' was absurd, but he felt a huge weight off his shoulders at your words. His gaze wandered over your lips for a few seconds, before he glanced quickly behind him.

"I-" He started slowly, looking suddenly slightly embarrassed. "Can I kiss you?"

His question made you smile for real this time, finding his reaction rather unexpected and ironic, given of what had happened earlier.

"Really, Hyunjin? You literally kissed me in front of dozens of people and now you're getting all embarrassed." You teased him. "So cute."

At your last comment, his expression changed dramatically. Suddenly, he leaned over and grabbed your chin, forcing you to lock your eyes with his.

"Me, cute?" He tilted his head to the side, his gaze languishing in your face, as if to memorize every detail. "You sure about that?" All trace of embarrassment had disappeared from his attitude. He looked more than serious and you couldn't deny that you liked this new facade of him.

"Why don't you show it to me then?" You didn't know where that line, or even that daring, had come from, but you didn't complain when Hyunjin's lips rested on yours for the second time that evening. The kiss was way more intense than the one you had shared earlier. Hotter and more eager. You gasped in surprise as Hyunjin grabbed you by the back of your thighs to lift you up, prompting you to wrap your legs around his waist. Your dress, which was already short, rose at this gesture, giving him easy access to your ass. Placing yourself on the bathroom counter, you were slightly disappointed when he pulled away from you, breaking your kiss. You looked at him with puppy eyes, as he turned around to close the bathroom door and lock it.

"Just making sure we won't be disturbed." He smirked, taking full notice of your desperate look. He wasted no time before stepping back between your legs, his lips joining yours for a warm kiss once again.

"Fuck, you don't know how many times I've fantasized about being like this with you since the last time." He whispered in admiration, as he kissed the path up to your neck, where he teasingly bit your soft spot which he found easily. You suppressed a small moan at his gesture, your fingers venturing into his long curls and pulling them gently. You could tell he liked it by the deep moan he made.

"You left me so hard when you ran away last time." He straightened up to look at you straight in the eyes, the sheer desire burning through his gaze making you feel in a certain way you could describe as sinful.

"I was afraid I had done something wrong when you pushed me away. I even felt bad for getting so excited after you teased me under the table in the presence of our parents." The tone of his voice clearly reflected nostalgia.

"But don't feel bad. I just panicked at the time." You smiled at him, passing a hand on his cheek to reassure him.

"And if I'm being honest, the situation got me excited too." You confessed shyly. Your revelation relaxed him slightly, but also boosted his confidence.

"Really?" He asked rhetorically, stroking your thighs with his fingertips. Your heart race increased as he rushed to drop hungry kisses down your collarbone, wasting no time slipping your sleeve, giving him a perfect access to the base of your breasts.

"Fuck.. Please..." You moaned, wiggling lightly against him, begging him for more, which made him smirk in satisfaction. You were as desperate for him as he was for you.

"My baby is so impatient. So sweet." He chuckled, visibly enjoying seeing you so hopeless for him to touch you intimately. It didn't take him long before he decided to finally slid his hand between your thighs, easily finding your clit, his fingers rubbing it so skillfully.

"I can already feel your wetness." He bit his lower lip, his dark eyes focusing on your face contracted with pleasure. You were so beautiful.

"Lay down." You were torn from your little cloud of pleasure again, when he removed his touch from your panties to remove it entirely, exposing your soaked pussy to him. You leaned back as he ordered, leaning back against the mirror behind you and opening your legs wide for him to give him an easy access to what he wanted the most right now. You knew seeing yourself so exposed and vulnerable just for him, hugely turned him on. The visible bulge on his crotch being the proof.

"You look so fucking good, baby." He said, licking his lips, obviously pleased pf the way you were already dripping just for him, when he barely touched you. Not breaking eye contact, he knelt between your legs, gripping your thighs to keep them firmly open, before languidly licking your cunt, stickinf his tongue inside of you. Your fingers found his hair again, gripping it tightly when Hyunjin suddenly began to suck on your sensitive swollen clit. You couldn't stop a few moans from escaping, even though you were trying the best you could to not to be too loud. Your hips subconsciously bucked against his face, forcing him to wrap his arms around your hips so that he could stabilize you moving too much. He intended to make you scream his name with pleasure and he wanted to do it the right way. You felt like you were losing your mind when the way he was eating you out changed, getting much more rougher and hungrier. He then suddenly slipped a finger, then a second, inside you, touching your weak spot with every pump and strock of his fingers.

"Hyunjin.. Too much.." You moaned, squirming more and more under his grip on you with each of his moves. Your thoughts were clouded with pleasure, dizzying your mind. You couldn't think properly anymore, only your orgasm, that you could feel was getting closer and closer, was the only thing you could think about. The tension, which you could feel building in your lower abdomen, exploded as Hyunjin once again eagerly wrapped his lips around your clit. Your eyes rolled back, as your orgasm washed you away, making you moan loudly in ecstasy. Seeing you come around his fingers and his mouth didn't make him stop his movements. You had to beg him to stop when it got too much for you to handle. His mouth and chin were almost dripping with your juice, giving his lips an delicious shine. You felt empty when his fingers slipped off you, but you ignored it, straightening up quickly and pulling him back into a sloppy kiss, where you clearly tasted yourself on his tongue. Your hands were hanging from the waistband of his pants, which you delicately untied during your erotic exchange. You desperately wanted to feel his cock, which you could feel was already hard enough, between your lips and at the very thought, you could feel your pussy getting wetter than before.

"My good girl is so desperate for my cock?" He whispered between your lips, the sudden nickname and the hand that came wrapping around your throat made you feel much more excited and eager for him. You moaned slightly in contentment at the pleasant feeling he made you feel just by his actions and presence. You went to answer him, but was cut off by what happened outside.

"5, 4, 3, 2, 1. Happy New Year!" The loud mixed voices of people still partying echoed throughout the house. At this understanding, you looked at each other for a few moments, before involuntarily bursting into laughter.

"New year, new girl, which means new resolutions. That's all I can say about it." He said, giving you a wink full of innuendos. Blushing, you couldn't hide the smile that crept onto your lips.

"I think it's the same for me then." You declared in admiration in your turn, matching his vibe.

"Good, because I have every intention of making up for the lost time." He whispered seductively. "In every sense of the word." His last words gave you shivers of anticipation. You knew you were in there for a long ride. After all, maybe the special connection you had as a kid hadn't changed at all.

[enbylesbianism]

ANY WAY THE WIND BLOWS: Simon Snow trilogy wrapped! (review)

Hi, there! It took me a while to finish this post, as I could talk about it for... a long time (not necessarily a good thing), but I got it! I like praise, so if anyone wants to tell me I did a good job... Also, I might edit this post later on. I don’t remember anything else I’d like to add, but I wouldn’t be surprised if I did after posting. My brain does not obey me. Anyways, off to it! By the way, I won’t give this book a real rating.

While this is a review on Any Way the Wind Blows, I intend on analysing some points of the overall series too. The book starts where Wayward Son left off, the end of the road trip, Simon and Baz having problems in their relationship, Penelope helping Shepard with his curse... and the whole situation of the NowNext vampires. Rainbow Rowell only seems to remember the first part. That leaves us with the second book of the series ignored almost completely, with the exception of Simon and Baz’s feelings as well as Shepard’s existence.

Don’t get me wrong, aspects of the book are mentioned, but never in a truly important way. Lamb, the Vampire King, is mentioned by Simon, but only focusing on his and Baz’s relationship, never about the fact that there are a bunch of vampires (supposedly ‘evil’) in the U.S. but I guess what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas, right? I could count on one hand the times the NowNext vampires were mentioned (like, literally, this isn’t an exaggeration, I looked up ‘NowNext’ on the e-book and only got five results), all of them either being one of them considering telling someone else about it, then not following through with it, or dismissing it as a concern for Lamb. Which makes the plot of Wayward Son completely useless for the trilogy. Now, that wouldn’t matter as much if everything else had been properly developed, but we definitely can’t say that.

We are introduced to a brand new, poorly developed villain, Smith-Smith Richards, whose character arc is as ridiculous as his name. He’s one of the fake Chosen Ones that started appearing after the events of Carry On (and the only one to be mentioned and/or defeated, for that matter). It becomes clear that presenting as Simon Snow-ish is part of his brand, especially when Baz describes him as looking like the Netflix adaptation version of Simon, and that he was raised and guided by his uncle, who’s just... there. I don’t think it would’ve been hard to make him manipulating Smith-Smith into believing he’s the prophetic savior of the Magickal World, which would not only make both of their characters more interesting, but it could also serve as a parallel of Simon’s relationship with the Mage. Richards also has some special powers such as increasing a mage’s magic for a limited amount of time, but taking it away afterwards, as well as making someone immune from spells. It’s worth saying those aren’t skills that are usual in the Magickal World, or else there wouldn’t be so much confusion and shock from people (specially Baz and Penny, who would definitely have heard of something like this before), but we get no explanation on why or how Richard has them.

Then, we have the Salisbury’s. We, as readers, already know Lucy and Davy are Simon’s parents, making Ruth his grandmother. It’s noticeable that Rowell builds up to that discovery, by making Simon get along with Ruth instantly, him thinking about Lucy a lot etc. It makes us excited to read the part where they actually figure it out, to know how Simon would deal with that, him dealing with the fact that he’s the Mage’s son and the fact that, technically, he killed his father. I suppose that’s the point, but actually getting to that part was incredibly underwhelming. The way they discovered about Simon—being able to lift a family sword—hadn’t been mentioned or hinted at before. One would’ve expected Simon, who’s particularly interested in swords as it’s mentioned many times throughout the series, to notice a freaking Excalibur at the Salisbury’s place before. 

And speaking of noticing things: when it’s finally revealed that Simon is Lucy’s son and the Mage’s heir, Baz pointed out the uncanny similarities between his boyfriend and the deceased Watford principal. “Those narrow eyes. That tilt of his head. I thought... I thought he’d learned it. Was imitating it.” + “Merlin, Simon, you even look like him.”  (Any Way the Wind Blows, chapter 86) Simon was the Mage’s protégé for years and I assume the Magickal authorities knew that he was the one to inherit all of his money and personal belongings, but no one, in the whole British Magickal community, thought about them being related? I refuse to believe there were no conspiracy theorist teachers at Watford or that Mitali or even the Pitch’s alongside everyone who was against the Mage didn’t at least check to know if there was something behind those characteristics. Baz literally said (chapter 88), “I think it’s undeniable. I’d cast ‘Flesh and blood’ on them, but it would bounce right off of Snow (...)”, so there is a spell for that. Plus, we didn’t even have one whole chapter of Simon dealing with this information! The chapters (no more than five, out of ninety-one) were divided between Simon, Baz and Lady Ruth’s POVs. He’s the main character, so one would think he’d get more development.

Another point that felt rushed was the romance. While Simon and Baz’s relationship wasn’t, as it’s been a topic Rowell has explored for three books (we’re not counting Fangirl here, as their ‘participation’ on it was minor and their personalities weren’t as consistent as in the trilogy. Not that it is that consistent there), the others just felt like she wanted everyone to finish the trilogy with a pair. I’ll start with Shepard and Penny. There were fans who liked them together before Any Way the Wind Blows, but it wasn’t hinted at—it was more like a fandom thing. I personally like them as a couple, but it could have had development and, maybe, foreshadowing in Wayward Son. I mean, they did fight monsters during a huge part of a road trip together.

The next one I’ll talk about is Agatha and Niamh. I love them, don’t get me wrong. Actually, it’s precisely because I love them that I wish they’d gotten a better treatment. Niamh wasn’t introduced before Any Way the Wind Blows. I get why she wasn’t introduced in Carry On—it was interesting to see a character who wasn’t caught up in Simon and Baz’s drama during the school years—but a hint of her existence could’ve been left in Wayward Son. Agatha is an important character on it, and a mention of her father training an aspiring veterinary could’ve fit somewhere, as a hint, maybe. (Also, Lucy, the dog, being absolutely forgotten during this book when a lot of Agatha’s time is spent in a veterinary clinic...) Besides, we could get the vibes from them, but after they kissed, there was barely any content. We didn’t get them calling each other ‘girlfriend’ (or if they even like that label at this point), or the aftermath of the kiss, or a POV from Niamh. Or Niamh appearing the epilogue? If Agatha was taking care of the goats, I’m sure Niamh would have a part in that too. Still on Agatha’s character, but not on Niamh’s, it felt like Rainbow Rowell was setting up for aromantic and asexual Agatha, specially because of this quote: “It was like she'd pulled the feeling right out of my heart. I could have kissed her. (I still wish sometimes that I wanted to.) (That would feel like an answer to... the question of me. Then I could say, 'Oh, thats who I am. That's why I've been so confused.')” (Wayward Son, chapter 4).

And I was leaving the best (I need to be sure everyone knows I mean this sarcastically) of the romance topic for the end: Fiona and Nicodemus. It’s just... so forced and undeveloped. Not even because, to me, they’re both gay as hell. There was just... such a lack of development! I don’t think we had any interaction between the both of them before Any Way the Wind Blows. There was no foreshadowing or why would Fiona, a vampire hunter from a family of vampire hunters, would marry... a vampire! I’d already find it weird to see fanfiction of them as a crackship, but it’s canon?! Like, canon as in they’re going to get married and use Fiona and Natasha’s mother’s ring? Seriously, nothing will take from me that this is a lavender marriage (as I’ve already discussed with my best friend, which inspired this post of theirs.)

I’d also like to speak about a topic that’d been hinted throughout the series, especially post-Carry On, which is the criticism towards the Magickal Community in the U.K.. That criticism is very much embodied in Shepard’s character. It’s explicitly said that the British mages have some kind of supremacy towards other supernatural beings, such as vampires for example, gatekeeping literal magic. Up until relatively recently, mages with weak links with magic couldn’t attend Watford (and that’s a major plot point in the final book) and there’s a denial towards any other kind of magic except the ones that are part of their craft. Even within the Magickal community itself, there are more important families that are more likely to succeed, like Natasha receiving criticism for marrying Malcolm, as a Pitch. It felt pointless not to tackle the issues you’ve set up yourself in your own universe. Penelope has very strict morals related to magickal law and beliefs, something that she could’ve deconstructed, especially considering Shepard, her love interest, symbolises that. Another point related to that is, the trilogy is very clearly heavily inspired by Harry Potter, where many of those points are very clear (e.g. wizard supremacy in relation to other species, such as werewolves and domestic elves and the status quo that makes some traditionally magical families more influential than others, like the Malfoy’s vs. the Weasley’s), so it’s not an easily forgettable concept.

The series also had a lot of inconsistencies. The one I’ve seen talked about more often is Simon and Agatha’s... intimacy status, let’s call it that. Simon’s whole thing in the first book was that he struggled controlling his magic when experiencing intense emotions, which makes it hard to believe that he managed to have sex withount an... accident. Besides that, though, there’s this quote, “She (...) presses a kiss into my temple. No one has ever kissed me there. No one has ever kissed me anywhere but on my mouth” (Carry On, Chapter 27), but in Any Way the Wind Blows, when Simon’s about to have his wings cut, Agatha says, “It’s a strange feeling to look at someone’s chest and know it’s nothing to do with you anymore, but still to remember kissing every inch.” (Chapter 14)

So, we have established that Rainbow Rowell’s work, both character and plot driven, is flawed. “But we got the characters interacting for the closure of the series, at least!” Well... we got interactions between the canon romantic relationships, yeah. But besides that, we didn’t get much. There were no interactions between Agatha and Penny, or Shepard with Simon and Baz. Or Penny and her mother figuring stuff out. Or literally anyone with a therapist. And not gonna lie, the interaction we got between Baz and Dev was underwhelming, to say the least. Niall is nowhere to be seen, too.

Rainbow Rowell’s writing is beautiful: she writes poetic lines that make the book seem perfect at first glance, if you don’t think about it for too long. Her words are very shiny, but once you get use to that light and see what’s behind them, what’s between one shiny quote and another, it has so many flaws and plot holes that it reads like a first draft. There are many concepts in there that are genuinely good: the rest of the trilogy focused on the protagonist dealing with the trauma of being a child soldier instead of being entirely an adventure, Simon being unlabelled, a fake Chosen One that gives mages fake hope... Those are all good ideas, but so poorly explored that, despite being an entire book/trilogy, it still feels like a writing pitch or something among those lines.

I felt iffy about other things during my reading of the series, but they aren’t exactly plot points, so I’ll just list them below:

Mitali, Penny’s mom, including ‘discovering your bisexuality’ as a mid-life crisis thing 

As I’ve seen people talking about biphobia/bi erasure in the books, I’ll be including this post that features both unlabelled and bisexual individuals talking about the topic (it isn’t my place, as a lesbian, to talk about this, that’s why I decided not to do so.)

Romanticising of Baz’s suicide (a.k.a. chapter 61) in the first book. If you’re not in a good place mentally, like I was when I first read Carry On, I hope you know that a kiss or romance doesn’t help any mental illness you or others might have. Don’t let anyone use your guilt to manipulate you. Paraphrasing Alice Oseman in their graphic novel Heartstopper, love can’t cure a mental illness.

Any Way the Wind Blows was... very horny. I can’t point out how this makes the book bad exactly, but it wasn’t something I enjoyed. One of Rainbow Rowell’s strongest skills is that her quotes, when loose, are good. They tend to be poetic and just beautiful, overall. But in the... explicit scenes, these skills were barely used, and I felt like I was reading NSFW tweets off of someone’s private account on Twitter. Besides, the first two books of the series weren’t written like that, so the change was very sudden.

The older people could’ve been more explored. Penelope and Mitali’s relationship and how similar the both of them are compared to each other, Daphne and Professor Bunce’s insecurities and why they believed in Smith-Smith, Fiona, Nico, and Ebb... Also, the Mage and Lucy. We could’ve had more on them, y’know. 

The pop culture references. They made the book read even more like Twitter’s feed. Honestly, if I wanted to read prompts and nice ship content alongside memes from Twitter with some horny thoughts sprinkled all around, I would’ve opened the Twitter app. Or Tumblr, Instagram, whatever.

The POV switching felt lazy to me at times. It’s nice to know how different characters are experiencing that situation, yes, but sometimes, like during the discovery that Simon is a Salisbury, it read as if Rowell wanted to create tension, but couldn’t think of any other way to do it except the switching around.

Narrative wise, I think Simon and Baz should’ve spent more time broken up.