#but also. Twilight is still super weird for that.

[dungeonmalcontent]

Twilight, but it's a reexamination of the way elves age in most fantasy universes.

"I know what you are. You're skin is pale and you're unbelievably fast."

"Not that fast. Marginally faster than most people. On average."

"Sometimes you speak like you're from another time, I've never seen your ears... and I've only ever seen you eat root vegetables."

"Just say it"

"no, you have to do the line..."

"*fine* Say it, out loud."

"You're an elf."

"Cool. Now can you please just not tell anyone about this?"

---

"How old are you?"

"I dunno, like... 460."

"But you don't look older than 17."

"I spent about 50 years looking like I was 10."

"And how long have you looked like you were 17?"

"uh--probably 200 years? I don't know. We don't age in reverse dog years, there isn't math for this."

"Ugh, Sindreth, you're so stupid."

[yumeka-sxf]

In addition to Yor's epiphany scene, this scene was the other one I was most looking forward to in season 2 - a scene that, in my opinion, is one of the most Twiyor-ish scenes in the series so far 💖

Why is it so significant? Because there was no reason for Twilight to put on any Loid Forger acting in that moment. He wasn't conversing with nor being scrutinized by anyone. So why would he give that soft smile followed by such affectionate, comforting words as "お疲れ様/otsukaresama"? (this can be translated in many ways, but generally it's something you say to thank someone for their hard work).

The answer is because it's something he truly felt...he understood the sacrifice Yor made for Anya's happiness and genuinely appreciated it (if only he knew the sacrifice she made on the larger scale, lol). While he's a bit perturbed at first since some onlookers were snickering at him, it didn't take long for him to soften and then graciously carry his queen and princess the girls back to the ship 😭

But Twilight overall was really soft in this episode and I loved it~ From his blush upon seeing Yor to the several times he gave that same soft smile when talking with/looking at her...I think Anya was right when she called him out on the ship about missing his wife 😅

I liked how the anime conveyed his shock when noticing her bruised face...what must have been his thought at that moment? 👀

The scenes of the family activities translated better in animated form in my opinion. While they were each only a single panel in the manga, they lasted a few seconds each in the anime, plus the addition of the insert song helped the with the comfy, wholesome vibe~ Also the part where Yor inadvertently chucks Anya across the ocean is still hilarious.

Loid's dorky skip at the beginning of the episode translated very well in animated form too 😅

The ending of this chapter in the manga always felt a bit rushed to me...it quickly jumps from the aforementioned scene of them returning to the ship, to suddenly being home, reuniting with Bond and Franky, having a meal together, then Twilight meeting Sylvia, all within a few panels. Even though I wish the anime added more than just some additional scenes of the ship leaving the island, I felt it flowed much better in the anime since, just like the family activities, each scene in the ending lasted a second or two instead of being a single illustration.

But I love how this chapter/episode ends, with Yor, Anya, and Bond napping while Anya draws about her family vacation. This seems to take place the next day or maybe later the same day they got home, so makes sense they'd still be tired from the trip!

By the way, the manga has this additional scene showing that Olka and company are safe. Weird that the anime didn't stick it in at some point.

Also, the anime team didn't have to go so hard with this episode's key visual but they did...and I love it 😍 Might actually be my favorite of the key visuals so far!

I was very happy to see the "surrounded by liars" panel finally animated! This is such a funny scene and a great way to fully wrap up the cruise arc.

I also burst out laughing at Yuri's locker 🤣

Damian is surprisingly laid back in this episode. I think the reason is because Anya's antics aren't directly involving him. He tends to go total tsundere only when she's actually talking to him, lol.

The new scene of Yor getting the keychains for her coworkers was a nice addition! Guess it's canon that Yor and Anya didn't sleep for the entire trip back, lol. Glad they got to spend family time on the ship too! (though I wish we could have seen Yor's reaction waking up in Loid's bottom bunk bed, haha. He must have brought her to his room since he wouldn't know where her room is. Unless she woke up before he even put her in a bed, in which case she would have been super embarrassed knowing he was carrying her around in public 😆)

Looks like next week the anime will be changing the order of things a bit and giving us the Becky home-wrecking and Fiona chapters (the latter of which seems to have some anime original content?) The Becky chapter is one of my favorite stand-alone chapters...I'm already dying of laugher thinking about it 😂

[delightfullyquirkydoodles]

Okay, buckle up, friends and neighbours, because it's time for:

THE DOOPLISS DISSERTATION

(Obviously, you should take all of this with a HUGE chunk of salt, since I'm not only an internet-poisoned fandom blogger, but also a former English major with a penchant for over-reading.

Still, I spent a long time writing this, so I'd appreciate it if you gave it a read.)

So before we talk about Doopliss himself, I feel like we should talk about Creepy Steeple, since a lot of the topics I'm going to be touching on relate to the actual building.

Neither the original Gamecube version nor the Switch remake really bothers to explain what Creepy Steeple actually is.

None of Goombella's tattles say anything about the building's intended purpose. The name vaguely implies that it's a church of some kind -- in Japanese, it's called Odoron Jiin, or "Astonishing Temple" -- but that's still not very helpful.

Still, for the purposes of this analysis, I'm going to assume that it's meant to be a church.

This brings me to the Steeple's stained glass window, which shows a scary-looking Doopliss standing over some piranha plants.

From a design standpoint, I'm guessing that this detail was added to give the location a spooky vibe, but from an in-universe perspective, the implications are wild.

Like, who designed this? How long ago? And why? What the heck is it supposed to represent?

Unsurprisingly, the game offers no real answers, but I have a couple of theories.

The first is that the people of Twilight Town (or their ancestors, or something) created the window in Doopliss's honor.

Stained glass windows often depict saints or angels, so maybe the Twilighters used to worship him? Like, maybe Creepy Steeple was once dedicated to him and then, for whatever reason, the worshippers decided to leave?

It's not super likely, but I didn't want to rule out any possibilities. This is a weird freaking temple. Literally anything is possible, as far as I'm concerned.

My second theory is that Doopliss designed the window himself. He seems like a guy with a lot of spare time, so it's not too much of a stretch to say that he came up with the idea and then spent weeks building it by hand.

He could have also bullied the Boos into constructing it for him. I dunno. I just have this mental image of him pulling pranks on them and generally being a nuisance until they caved.

The bottom line is someone wanted to Doopliss's face to be front and center. And if that someone is Doopliss himself, then hoo boy, there is a lot to unpack here.

Maybe I'm projecting, but it feels like Doopliss is wrestling with some major self-esteem issues.

Despite being an incredibly powerful shapeshifter who somehow cursed an entire town, he seems very childish. He spends all his time watching TV and coming up with new jokes. He throws tantrums when he loses. He wears a party hat, of all things.

Based on that, I'd say that he's probably starved for attention. He's probably pretty lonely living in Creepy Steeple all by himself (doubly so if my theory about the Twilighters is correct).

I'd even go so far as to say that his scheme to turn the Twilighters into pigs is motivated by this need for attention. I mean, what better way to get people to notice you than to cause a town-wide panic?

I feel like the disguises he uses over the course of the main story also support this theory.

Though Mario, Zip Toad and Professor Frankly are quite different from one another, they all have one important thing in common: they're famous. Mario's a world-renowned adventurer, Zip Toad is a well-known actor and Frankly is a tenured professor whose students love him.

Doopliss even alludes to this after stealing Mario's body, telling him, "You're so popular around here! I just love being you!"

By transforming into beloved figures, Doopliss can get the attention he craves.

I also think that this is why he joined the Shadow Sirens. Sure, Beldam abuses him almost as badly as she abused Vivian, but at least she notices him. That's better than nothing.

The most conclusive piece of textual evidence is found in the epilogue. In her letter to Mario, Goombella explains that Doopliss has joined Flurrie on-stage in her production of "Paper Mario".

Obviously his shapeshifting abilities make the play a lot more realistic, but why would he bother participating in it at all? This guy was a villain for most of the game. Why would he suddenly decide to join up with one of his enemies?

Because, as far as I can tell, he's not a villain. Just a guy who's sick of being ignored.

I dunno. Doopliss's motivations have never been super clear, but I feel like there's more to him than meets the eye.

If you have any thoughts or ideas of your own, feel free to comment. I'd love to hear your thoughts on this.

[panlight]

Imagine Bella being immune to vampire venom. Edward wasn't able to suck all the venom out and her body ended up used to the small amount of venom left over and she's bitten again and can't change.

GENINUELY one of my favorite AU scenarios.

And I personally think it makes more sense than the biology behind Renesmee's existence, but your mileage may vary.

In my head it works sort of like a vaccine; she's been exposed and now has the antibodies to fight off the effects of venom. She doesn't feel pain when bitten (other than the pain of teeth breaking her skin) and she can't be turned.

It totally upends all her plans and puts a REAL obstacle in place for her and Edward to be together. Before it was just Edward not wanting to turn her which, sure, is a problem but a fairly easy one to get around: she knows a bunch of other vampires, one willing to try to turn her (Alice) and another with a proven track record of successful turnings (Carlisle). It's not impossible.

Her being immune does make it impossible though. I could be here for the tragic impossibility, how there's no way for them to be together forever now.

But I ALSO think that in such a scenario it might be possible to make a cure for vampirism from Bella's blood. I think if you want happy fairy tale ending for your vampire story, the way to do it is 'unhappy vampires become human' not 'unhappy human becomes vampire; other vampires still have same problems that made them unhappy.' Good for Bella she was following her bliss as a vampire in BD, but I never got how Bella being happy made things any better for Rosalie, or Esme, or Carlisle, or Jasper. Emmett and Alice were reasonably happy as vampires already, or Alice at least didn't know anything different. Rosalie and Esme wanted to be mothers, not aunt/grandma. And Renesmee literally grows up so fast they're missing out at most of those baby/toddler/childhood experiences anyway. Plus Breaking Dawn doesn't really address the issue of whether Bella lost her soul or not, or if Renesmee even has one at all. Edward's happy in BD but will it last or will his worry start creeping back in with time? He's got plenty of it.

But if Bella's blood could be used to make a cure and the option to become human is a thing . . . that gets SUPER interesting to me. Who would take it? Is it reversible? Like, could Rosalie and Emmett become human, have a couple of kids, age until their 30s or 40s and then ask Alice and Jasper (who presumably stay vampires) to turn them back? Or is it one way choice and they become immune to venom like Bella is? Part of me thinks Carlisle deep down wants to be human more than Edward and Rosalie even do (he has crafted his whole vampire lifestyle around being as a human as possible--a job, a wife, kids, a house . . . all very weird for a Twilight vampire) but would the knowledge that he could help more humans as an immortal doctor than a mortal one hold him back? Would he and Esme stay vampires to watch over Edward and Rosalie/Emmett if they all became human? Would the Volturi see this power to turn vampires human as a threat, a weapon?

And just the irony of the one person who wanted to be a vampire being the one who can't become one and whose blood has the power to turn the vampires she loves and envies human. Delicious.

[lil-frenchfri77]

Begin Again

Summary: Ever since Bella came back to Forks things between y/n and her boys have been different. Embry and Quil stopped answering phone calls and texts, they’ve even been avoiding her everytime she shows up at their house. So y/n does the only thing she can think to do, she latches onto Jacob just like Bella, and when he starts acting like Embry and Quil did, she makes the decision to not put so much effort into a friendship that is clearly one sided. But what happens one day when Sam’s pack is in town at the same time as y/n and her new friends and two certain boys imprint on their former best friend? And what happens when a former best friend doesn’t feel the same way?

Author’s Note: Hello to everyone that is reading this! This is my first ever time writing a fanfic, so (if you’re reading this) go easy on me. I would love to hear any feedback anyone might have in the comments. Super excited to be writing this Twilight fic, I’ve been inspired by others authors on here to take my own spin with Stephaine Myers characters, none of which I have any ownership to. This doesn’t really follow the Eclipse movie timeline, I'm making things up and stretching the timeline. So this is basically my own story just using Stephanie’s characters and some of her themes. There are also some other characters in here that I don’t have any rights to, I just thought it would be fun to put them in this story. I don’t know how long or short this is going to be, I might be able to get my ideas across quickly or this might turn into a few chapters. If you’ve read this far I love you and I really hope you like this!

(Also not beta read cause I can’t afford that)(Dividers from @enchanthings here on Tumblr)

Y/n/n means your nickname 

Embry Call x Fem!Swan!Reader x Quil Ateara

Slight Stiles Stlinski x Reader

Chapter 1 | Master list | Chapter 2

Things had been weird lately, with Bella back in Forks, the Cullens, and your friends on the reservation. It seemed like everyday more and more of your friends were leaving to go hang out with Sam Uley and his pack of assholes. Now it was just down to you, Embry, Quil, and Jacob. It’s not like you’re not fine with that, Embry and Quil were your best friends ever. So you were fine with just the four of you hanging out all the time. But they got so hostile of you whenever Edward or one of his siblings came around to talk to you or Bella. 

It was getting absolutely exhausting trying to mediate things between them. You didn’t want to have to choose between your boys or Bella, but if it came down to it, your choice would always be your family and by extension, the Cullens. Although it seemed like you wouldn’t be getting a choice anyways when Embry and Quil stopped answering your texts and calls. They were never home when you came to visit and see what was happening to them. You had even tried asking Jacob if he knew anything but he swore up and down that he had no idea. 

You never expected to see them hanging out with Sam and his pack, jumping off that stupid cliff. You had never felt more betrayed. They could do whatever they wanted to but it hurt that they felt the need to drop you, without any kind of explanation and go hang out with the few people (at least you thought) you mutually disliked. It was obvious that they weren’t going to talk to you anymore so you did the only thing you could think of, you left them one last voicemail in hopes to get through to them. 

“Hey, it’s me. Um, I know we haven’t talked in a while, but I still miss you guys. I saw you the other day, hanging out with Sam and his boys. It’s fine, I guess. I just thought that we were better friends than that. I mean, we’ve been inseparable since we were 6 but that’s not really the point of why I called.” You took a deep breath, trying to stop yourself from rambling some more. “I don’t really understand why you started hanging out with Sam but you have free will so I can’t stop you. But I miss you guys, and I still want to be friends. I don’t want to permanently lose you both because I can’t get over this petty dislike I have. So, call me back. Please. I want to talk about everything, but if you truly want nothing to do with me anymore then I won’t bother you again. This is goodbye, then.” 

2 months later

Life wasn’t the easiest thing anymore. The boys never called you back, which you expected but it still stung. You still had Jacob, but it wasn’t the same. Jacob knew how much Embry and Quil’s choice had affected you, but there wasn’t much he could do to help you. He couldn’t just tell you that they were werewolves. So he did his best to try and raise your spirits. You were wholeheartedly grateful you had him during this time. 

Bella wasn’t much help either, she had just been broken up with and she was rotting away in her room. It appeared as though life was hating the Swan girls right now. As much as you wanted to wallow in your own pity you knew you had to be there for Bella. It’s not like the kids from school were going to help her, and honestly Bella wouldn’t want them to. So you spent months trying to help Bella, you didn’t want to lose your sister too. 

“Please, Bells. Just talk to me, tell me what’s going on in your head. I’ll do anything to help you, you just have to tell me. Tell me what I can do for you, I want to take all this pain away. I know this isn’t about me or dad but we’re so scared for you Bells. We love you so much.” You plead  with her. Tears welled up in your eyes when she turned away from you and went back to looking out of her window. You walked out of her room before she could see or hear you start to cry. 

“Whoa, slow down there kid. What’s happening?” Charlie stopped you in the hallway. His hands gripped your shoulders as they shook with silent sobs. 

“I can’t watch her wither away like that dad. She’s changing so much, and I don’t know how to help her. I hate Edward for what he’s putting her through and he’s not even here.” You spoke through your tears. Hiccuping in between every breath you took. 

“Y/n,” Charlie whispered, cupping your cheeks and making you look up at him, “We will get her through all of this okay kid? You and me will bring our Bella back. I know it.” He assured you as genuinely as he could. Truth be told, he had no idea if he would be able to get his daughters back to the girls they were before all this happened. He was grateful that you seemed to be okay so soon after the Embry and Quil situation. He didn’t know what he would do if both of his kids were nervous wrecks he couldn’t console. 

You nodded at him instead of answering back. You knew he was just trying to make you feel better. As much as you wanted to stay and keep trying with Bella you had to go to school. You couldn’t miss any more days this week or you would fall too far behind. 

After getting dressed you head downstairs where you say goodbye to your dad and meet Jacob who’s waiting for you outside. Lately he has taken to riding with you to school and then walking back to the reservation afterwards so you weren’t alone in the mornings. It was also a way for him to keep an eye on you and Bella. 

“You know, you don’t have to keep doing this Jake, I’m perfectly okay with getting to school by myself.” You told him today. It has been on your mind for a little while now. 

“I know,” he chuckles, “but I like to. Sometimes I don’t want to be alone in the morning so I make you suffer and force my presence on you. You’re going to have to get used to it.” Jacob simply shrugged. 

You get quiet after that and it worries him, but before he can ask you what’s wrong you beat him to it

“If you ever want to be friends with Sam and everyone else, please don’t cut me off too. I don’t think I could handle that.” Your hands grip the steering wheel tighter as you pull up to a red light. You can’t bring yourself to look over at him, as you not so patiently wait for his answer. 

“Y/n/n, I will never abandon you to be friends with Sam and his pack of douchebags. Okay? It's you and me against the world now.” He says in such a loving tone that it brings tears to your eyes for the second time that day. “Oh god, please don’t cry. I totally didn’t mean for that to happen.” 

Watching him panic while he tries to get you to stop crying does the trick, and you start to giggle at him. The rest of the drive to your school is silent with the occasional sing along moment to whatever is playing on the radio. When you finally arrive at school you're in a much better mood. 

You say goodbye to Jacob and head into the building, putting on your headphones and turning the volume all the way up. Someone knocks into you from the side sending your phone and headphones sliding across the floor. 

“Oh my god. I’m so freaking sorry!” Apologizes spill from the mystery boy's mouth as his friend, the one who pushed him into you, hurries to gather your things. He turns around to his friend on the floor and hisses out “Dude. What the hell??” 

It wasn’t surprising that you had to clue who these boys were. When you were friends with Embry and Quil you didn't really talk to the people you go to school with. “It’s fine.” You shrugged it off, not wanting to create a problem with these two. 

“No, its not fine. I totally didn't mean to smash into you. Scott’s just an asshole.” The boy throws his friend, Scott, under the bus. “I’m Stiles by the way.” 

“I didn't mean to push him into you miss, I didn't even see you there.” Scott pipes in, before quickly realizing what he said. “OH! I didn't mean I didn't see you at all, like you're just hard to see. Cause you’re not hard to miss. Not that you're always in the way! I've never seen you before so… I'm going to stop talking now.” Scott sheepishly tugs at the collar of his shirt. He seems to be sweating now. The incredulous look on your face seems to shut him up well enough for his friend, Stiles, to get a word in. 

“Wow dude, that was bad.” He’s trying to hold back his laughter now. “I think what he's trying to say is that he was so preoccupied with being an asshat that he wasn't paying attention to our surroundings.” Stiles says it a lot more eloquently than Scott had and it makes you giggle. 

They both stare at you like you've grown a second head. “That was the worst apology I have ever heard in my entire life.” You state after getting ahold of your laughter. “I’m y/n. I accept your terrible apology, and it's okay that you haven't seen me around before, because to be honest. I've never seen either of you around before either.” 

They let out a breath of relief and apologize one more time, sounding more coherent and sincere this go around. Scott proceeds to ask you what you have for the first period and surprisingly you have the same class as them, so you all walk to your class talking and getting to know each other. When you get to class you part ways to your seats with plans to meet after class. 

Your class schedules were pretty similar, especially yours and Stiles. In the classes you and Stiles shared you decided to move seats and sit next to each other, getting in trouble a few times for talking too much. You were getting along with him so well that he invited you to sit with him and his friends at lunch. And since you didn't have any other plans you took him up on his offer. 

When lunch time rolls around Stiles follows you to your locker where you get your food before heading to the cafeteria to meet up with his friends. The table quiets down when the two of you approach. “Y/n these are my friends: Lydia, Allison, Issac, Liam, Malia, Kira, and you've already met Scott.” One by one his friends say hello and introduce themselves to you. This wasn’t at all how you thought it was going to go. You assumed that they would only give you a cursory hi and go back to their conversations, but they seemed genuinely interested in getting to know you.

[midnight-in-town]

Classical language and paranormal powers : Anya Forger and Arnold Crowley

Crack theory that I haven't seen anywhere, but I can't get it out of my head since ch95, so here goes.

We've had enough clues across the story so far to understand that there is a link between Anya's past and telepathic powers and her mastering classical language (which is not spoken anymore nowadays, according to Twilight), which recently earned her a stella :

While the nature of the link is still unclear, I can't help but question if Sensei hid other clues about this topic.

More specifically, Anya scored second, a big victory for her, but we eventually even met the kid who scored slightly better than she did in ch 95:

Moreover, he seemed particularly interested in Anya and wanted to meet her, before the dance party gave him the chance to.

Of course, it can be purely mundane kid behavior or just a comical way to annoy Damian, but still, I couldn't help but notice that mainly he, like Anya, has weirdly shaped pointed hair.

Might I even add, he has 3 horns/antennas, while Anya only has 2 (is it why he scored better ?). That's one similarity to two kids scoring well in classical language. Could be coincidental, I hear you.

Even more recently though, Anya and Yor encountered Melinda at a festival, when trying to get a fortune telling for Anya. Melinda shyly explained to Yor that it's a hobby of hers and that she believes in destiny and paranormal activities & powers, like telepathy :

However, Melinda is not super confident in her reading abilities, which is why she's not charging any money for it. But did you notice the name of another fortune teller who seems very accurate and popular, in ch107 ?

That's right : Magical * Crowley

Of course, at this point we don't know at all whether or not Arnold from ch95 is related to this fortune teller. However, I kinda doubt Sensei would mistakenly give the same name to the weird boy who beat Anya in classical language and to a popular fortune teller, when someone like Melinda, of all people, hardcores believes paranormal forces and powers are real.

Melinda who, by the way, is extremely scared of her husband who may have undergone surgery to get telepathic powers at some point.

Last but not least, we also know that fortune telling is likely to be a real thing in this universe, meaning Magical * Crowley's could have actual powers, considering Anya's family already owns a dog, Bond, who can see the future.

TL;DR Arnold Crowley from ch95 may be a kid with a strange power, like Anya is.

What this has to do with them being good at classical language, which is not used anymore nowadays, I don't know**, but I'd bet a few pennies it's going to be plot relevant.

**EDIT : To specify on what I currently imagine, since Anya's powers disappear during the new moon, maybe her powers depend on some kind of emitting/transmitting wavelengths (received by her hair horns/antennas), that could be coded with classical language (since it's not spoken anymore) ? It is a spy manga after all. x)

And if I were Endo-sensei, I'd take it a step further and reveal that she was actually hearing/reading all along people's thoughts in classical language, because that's how her powers were coded. She just doesn't realize it, because she's 4 years old, which is why most of her mistakes during classical language tests were spelling ones.

We shall see later. :) Thanks for reading and happy new year 2025 !

[rinstaro]

Hyrule, wild, twi, time, and sky’s reaction to reader squirting on them for the first time? How would they deal with the reader being super shy after?

ur a genius. i love this ask MWAH let me give you a kiss. i’ve been having a hard time writing but i really like this idea

i played around with formatting here lol, looks weird.

cw: squirting obv, overstim, coochie eating, praise, breeding kink in times, he also calls you pup, fingering, doggy, mating press, reader has a vagina no pronouns

minors do not interact.

hyrule

will be shy himself! he’s in such belief that he did that to you. he made you feel so good you squirted on him. i wouldn’t be surprised if he came right there or even came untouched. and even then, he’s hard again immediately. he'd flush with excitement, asking you over and over how good it felt. it only makes you more embarrassed.

you whimpered his name over and over as the knot in your stomach began to unravel. he groaned into your cunt, lips attached to your clit. you looked down at him, shuddering at the sight of him staring back at you like a starved man. your orgasm hit abruptly, causing your legs to kick out and your cunt to spray all over his face. your boyfriend almost choked at the sudden orgasm that hit him, staring at you wide eyed as his cum pooled onto the sheets. once the both of you caught your breath, you apologized profusely.

"n-no! it was, fuck, it was so hot, sweetheart. c-can we... i wanna try that again.”

wild

oh he’s smug. he’s so proud of himself. he’s always doing things for others but pleasing you was special to him. he stops for a moment to just watch you gush and then goes down to kiss your clit. he'll quiet your embarrassed cries by telling you how pretty you looked.

your chest heaved as you tried to catch your breath. your legs trembled in his hold, his fingertips leaving small bruises on your thighs. he stared down at the spot where you two met. your soaked pussy was still fluttering around him. when wild looked back at your face, you were whimpering in embarrassment, arms hiding your face. he chuckled softly, gently moving your arms out of the way.

"f-fuck babe im sorry-"

"no no, baby, you were so pretty. you think i can make you do that again before i cum?”

twi

an animal. you don’t get a chance to be shy because he doesn’t stop, not even for a second. whether he’s drinking down your cum or fucking you through your orgasm, he needs you to do it again. he needs to taste it, to feel it— he just needs more and will go for as long as he’s allowed.

you hid your face in the pillows, the soft material muffling your wails. twilight wouldn't let up, pounding into you as if he didn't know when he'd get the chance again. he'd been desperate, barely giving you a chance to breathe as he ravaged all of your sensitive spots before manhandling you onto all fours. you felt your orgasm coming, and he could too. "go on 'n cum, you deserve it, doll." you obeyed without a word, sobbing when you squirted all over the sheets. his thrusts never stop, making you squirm to escape his grasp.

"not done yet. i want you to drench me, 'kay darlin'?"

time

a menace! will tease you about it relentlessly both degrading and praising you. immediately goes to make you do it again, watching your face the entire time. he wants to watch your face this time as you cum so hard that you soak him. it because his goal now to make you squirt at least once every time you have sex

your dear husband had you in a mating press, dick stretching your poor cunt as far as it could go. your eyes were crossed as you let out little 'ah-ah-ahs' at his harsh thrusts. time wanted to fuck you full, making sure you had at least 3 loads in you by the time he was done. he wanted you stuffed full with a kid asap. time felt you clenching around him and began to play with your clit, making you feel so good you could cry. you shrieked suddenly, body seizing up as you came. “dirty, dirty pup," he called. you whined, uttering a quiet 'don’t look, please' that made him chuckle and grab your chin. "you squeezed me so hard, felt so good. you're so messy... could you do that again for me, dear?”

sky

lets you ride it out and then asks you what the fuck was that LMAO. like he knows, he's just so surprised that it happened out of no where. he wasn't even trying. but now he's going to have to make you cum like that every time. so he's gonna take his time making you cum on his fingers, his tongue, and his dick. it may take a few nights but he is determined.

your sweet boyfriend had been in between your legs prodding at your g spot with his fingers for what seemed like forever. you'd already cum twice, but this one felt stronger. your moans rose in volume as you finally caved, sensitive cunt gushing all over sky's arm. sky didn’t know where to look. his soaked hand, your trembling legs, or your fucked out face. you just sprayed all over him and you were mortified. you pulled your legs in, turning your head and hiding your face from him. he smiled down at your form. "don't be shy, sweetheart... need you to do that again. on my cock this time. maybe on my face later if you're not too passed out. pretty please? wanna feel your cunt squeeze me like you did my fingers."

[mon-chef]

FREE THOUGHTS ON CLAIRE BEAR

(from an ARDENT sydcarmy shipper)

• I’m finding it really hard to keep disliking Claire. (I don’t actually think I ever did.)

• Claire is deeply kind and also deeply bland.

• Do I pity her? Yes.

• Do I believe her and Carmy should be together ? No.

• Do I think her and Carmy are even good for each other? I definitely think Carm could stand to experience her kindness and some softness but no way, in the long run I don’t think they would be good for each other. (That’s neither of their fault’s tho)

• I don’t see her as some conniving villain that’s trying to steal Carmy away from his responsibilities, I see her as just a girl who wants to be with a boy she really likes (and who could blame her).

• I just don’t see it as her duty to keep a grown man focused on his job. In my opinion Carmy is all the way in the wrong. He’s wrong for not honoring his commitment to the team (AND TO SYDNEY!!!!!!). He’s also dead ass wrong for using Claire as a means of distraction. I get that he might not be aware that he’s doing it,but is still his fault and not hers.

• NGL it is wild that she “tracked” Carmy down after he gave her a fake number. If it had been me, homeboy would absolutely never had heard from me EVER AGAIN Like that’s so embarrassing. Technically it worked out for her so props, I guess, but Jesus she lacks shame is persistent.

• I think the fandom can be so unfair to Claire and it’s making me feel defensive of her. Even though initially I felt like she was a super unnecessary character. (Sort of like Renesmee in Twilight (like what is even the point of her?) I understand CLAIRE’s relevance to the narrative now I guess (thanks to some people’s meta posts) but I could probably still do without her tbh. I know there are reasons to dislike her but to frame her as some she-devil who’s manipulating a helpless man is textbook fucking misogyny. It is really weird that people cannot see that.

• I will be a SYDCARMY stan TILL I DIE and it hurts me to say this but I think them calling her Claire-Bear is sooo adorable. I mean think it’s stupid that they call HER that but it is such a cute nickname and it aligns with the Berzatto family nickname and I wish that Sydney got something similar. (This is could still happen,,,,,maybe)

————————

Just throwing some thoughts at the wall maybe I’ll expand on these later.

[mj-ackerman]

I just checked the jp version. In the jp version Loid said 「頑丈すぎる.....!!!ヨルさんの蛮行に晒され続けた結果なのか？」/ “He's so tough...! Is this the result of being continuously exposed to Yor's barbaric strength?”

Idk but this is so funny to me. This also proves that Loid / Twilight is totally aware of Yor's super strength but still doesn't see or think of it as suspicious or weird. Or maybe he actually did think it was weird for a "NORMAL" city hall clerk to have that kind of strength but he's keeping a blind eye to all of Yor's red flags so he could keep her as his wife.

[the-moon-files]

Aaaaa, hi!! I'm the anon who sent in the fairly recent ask with the Guide!Reader ideas (martial artist mention, Dehydrated Ganon, strength possibilities, Ganon not being able to escape from Guide!Reader's voice, etc)! I'm really glad that you liked my ideas so much!! 😊 I was so pleasantly surprised to see you expand on my discombobulated thoughts, haha! Thank you so much! ^w^ I loved reading them!!

I said that I made memes for the Guide!Reader/Space Orc concept, and now I shall deliver them >:D Firstly, I'm super sorry that I took so long to share these with you!! Life decided to kick me in the shins for a hot second 😭 And secondly, I made a LOT of images for this one,, Fair warning, this is going to take up a lot of space 😭 orz

But anyway!! Here are the text memes first:

Guide!Reader: We’re playing Scrabble. It’s a nightmare.

Wars: Scrabble? Scrabble’s great.

Guide!Reader: Not when you’re playing with Zelda, it’s not. She’s out here putting in words like “ephemeral” while I’m putting in “dog.”

☆

Guide!Reader: *pointing out Magic Powder* Legend, look, it’s the good kush!

Legend: …This is the Rupee Store, how good can it be?

☆

Ravio: Hi, welcome! Are you part of our Super Savers Shoppers Club?

Guide!Reader: No, I’m not.

Ravio: :D :) :| Oh.

☆

Legend, looking into a banged-up Water Temple: …It’s trash.

☆

Time, whenever Guide!Reader uses modern slang: We need IRL subtitles. What are you even saying.

☆

Guide!Reader: My Furby died in my arms when I was a child.

Hyrule, has no clue what a Furby is: I’m so sorry for your loss.

Guide!Reader: It wasn’t a loss. I had never felt more like a god.

☆

The Chain: *getting told off by Time*

Guide!Reader in the back: …

Guide!Reader: *starts playing the ukulele* 👁👄👁 🎸

Time: 🧍

☆

Four, talking about Guide!Reader: So, I’m interested in someone…

Dot: :D Oooh! What do they look like?

Four: *slow realisation*

Four: I don’t know

Dot: Wh

Dot: What do you mean you don’t know?

☆

Guide!Reader/Ganon, about hearing Guide!Reader every dang game: The universe has a sense of humour, and I respect the commitment to the bit, but girl please.

☆

Guide!Reader, to Link once they reunite with the Chain: Now… *puts hand on his shoulder* We’re back on our bullsh*t.

☆

Guide!Reader and Wild, meeting Sidon for the first time:

Guide!Reader: …Would.

Wild: Would what?

Guide!Reader:

Wild: (Name)? Would what?

☆

Wind: When you become famous you’re called a legend because your leg ends.

Guide!Reader: What? 

Wind: Your leg. It ends.

Guide!Reader: I’m not a linguist, but I think you’ve got it wrong.

Wind: Are you saying your leg doesn’t end?

Guide!Reader: I mean, at some point it does, yes.

Wind: Then what’s the problem?

☆

The Chain, waking up at dawn to get ready:

Guide!Reader and Sky, just trying to process being alive:

☆

Guide!Reader/Time: You need to get out of bed faster than this.

Sky, struggling: I’m giving it all he’s got, boss

☆

Guide!Reader at Ganon: Your anger amuses me. Please don’t find inner peace. Please.

☆

Guide!Reader, playing through LoZ game: *at an annoying NPC* Let me ask you a very fair question. What do you do successfully? Quickly. :|

Link, trying not to laugh:

☆

Hyrule, probably: I hate it when a recipe tells me to add two cups of onions. They don’t come in cups. They come in onions.

Guide!Reader, head in hands: Please

☆

Hyrule/Twilight, looking at two NPCs: Are they lovers?

Guide!Reader, who knows the lore: Worse.

☆

The Chain, enjoying Guide!Reader’s affections:

Legend: 🚶‍♂️🚶‍♂️🚶‍♂️

☆

Legend, defending himself from the “You like him” allegations from Wind: 🤸🤸🏃‍♂️🏃‍♂️

And now, onto the images- I hope you don't think the sheer amount of these memes is too excessive or anything!! 😭 /gen

Aaa and that's all the memes I've got! I hope you like them,,! orz

I'm also still pretty new to Tumblr, so I'm sorry if the format looks a bit weird,,

Oh, but also?? That last point you mentioned in your most recent post about the cultural differences between humans and Hylians on physical affection/touch?? I am VERY excited to see that,, 👀 👉👈 

U HAVE NO IDEA HOW IN LOVE W/UR BRAIN I AM RN

IM SO FUCKING ECSTATIC TO SEE THESE >>> ANYTHING IVE EVER WRITTEN U MADE MEMES??? FOR MY BS?????? DAOHGHOAKJSALKGFS;NDFKNDNFKJBDBFLN;

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

BLESS YOU, BEHEAMOTH SCREAMOTH MY BELOVED <3333

HAVE THAT HYLIANS V. HUMANS AFFECTION CULTURE POST HERE, THE ONLY PAYMENT I CAN THINK OF FOR THIS 😩😩 🛐 🛐 🛐

I LIED ITS TOO LONG, ITS GONNA BE A SEPERATE POST COME BACK AND PLS READ IT AS PAYMENT (but dont read the nsft/w if ur a minor)

BRO u got all the energy, and the dynamics i was pushing ilysm 🥺🫶

like the Hyrule = beloved agenda ive been pushing, bc i need more underrep links content, the way u carried the ganon eternally getting haunted by guide reader voice?? 10/10 ahdsfkhadl

AND WIND’S CONSTANT ENERGY OF A YOUNGER BROTHER LOOKIN U DEAD IN THE EYE LIKE “u kiss the homie (singular not even plural) goodnight?? Brother, that’s GAEY.”

u have no idea what this means to me, the impact, the understanding u have to have of my bs to make these, and how many posts youve read of mine?? im so sorry for ur loss w/my rough writing lmao

thats how you know youve made it tbh is if someone makes memes of smth u made, anyway day brightened, complexion clear, depression medicated, by this post

I HOPE BOTH SIDES OF UR PILLOW ARE COLD, UR PETS CUDDLE U EXTRA, U GET ALL THE GRADES/GOOD WORK SHIFTS U NEED

Peace out my beloved <3,

🌙

[cafecourage]

feral twilight feral twilight feral twilight

or, i am once again simping for feral twilight

Everyone likes a Feral Link. ☺️

- hard to get twilight to even be feral. You have to have that man let go of the metaphorical leash he has on his wolf instincts. Even then it won’t ever be pointed at you since he doesn’t want to get violent by accident and hurt you.

- If you did talk him into getting to that point there will still need to be some time before you see it. When you’re lucky he could wake up and in his morning brain let his body take control and just lazy lay on you. Nippling at the nape of your neck maybe leaving a few kisses. He isn’t going to let you go once he gets started but it’s going to be very sweet.

- Now on the flip side Feral Twilight when he is at that state of no thoughts or little thoughts just wolf brain. He is super protective which isn’t saying much since it’s Twi. But I’m talking about having you in his arms and not letting you go sort of protective. He isn’t going to let even other links near you if you were in that much trouble. He basically guard dogging you.

- Feral Twilight might also be a bit… weird because Twilight in such a state of no thoughts that he would start doing things he wouldn’t normally do. He is still a good boy! He will listen to if you say no. But he is gonna only listen to you and like Time or Wild. So handling him might just be up to you in the long haul. As again him getting to an animistic state means probably a lot of danger. So you’re really the only one that can look after him, also being the fact that he is clinging on to you most of the time anyway.

- Most likely Feral twilight would be the result of two things. A monster battle that results in you getting hurt. Which god speed for that poor soul. They will be dead in minutes. Twilight when this happens will almost be unstoppable since all reservations are gone. They hurt you. They will perish.

- The second is if Twilight is Wolfie for too long. If he stays in wolf form he is going to have a hard time breaking habits he did before. So it’s not feral as its wolf brain going BRRRRRRRRRRRR.

- Lastly and this is the most extreme case. FD Twilight is dangerous. He is probably the most feral Twilight can get and will chase you down if you run away. It’s a hunt and your his prey.

- I fully believe Twilight won’t even remember what happened when he was put under that much pressure. Nor should he know, he will get guilty and ashamed of it. Being a wolf isn’t something he really sees as something worth boasting about. So Feral Twilight might be a secret until someone asks about it. Then he will piece the pieces together and have to explain in better details.

[bokettochild]

The Chain and Magic

Your magic reflects you more than your body.

Wild's magic screams Death to most people. Unnatural, Broken, Wrong. This thing should not be here. This is a thing, his magic doesn't label him as Hylian anymore, he's not exactly Hylian anymore anyways, so why would it? Instead, magic users see a hylian but their magic will scream at them that that Thing is dressed as a hylian but it is Something Else piloting a hylian.

Four's magic also says Broken. Shattered, pieces, not quite right. He's confusing because he's in pieces, but the pieces don't fit together anymore. They look like they could, but once you look closer you realize that they're just slightly Off and while you could force the pieces together, it still wouldn't Fix him

Twilight's says Darkness. Warmth and love and darkness. His magic feels like a person holding you while you sleep. It's got a dangerous side to it, but not scary. Like, yes, he is a big doggy, he will watch over you but yes, he will bite if you pull his tail, so just don't pull his tail, okay?

Sky's is terrifying. He's pretty and he's sweet, but magic users take one look at him and wonder why a god is standing in front of them and if he's going to smite them? His magic says Strength, Courage, Protection. Once you know what he's protecting, you avoid that thing like the plague lest you upset him

Time's magic is Twisted. His is Wrong in ways that make magic users flinch. He's not like Wild, where his magic says "I shouldn't be here" or Four who says "I'm not all myself, I'm many of myself" Time's magic screams "I am more than myself but I cannot tell where I end and where the foreign begins". To magic users, Time is like a human centipede, or Frankenstein; there is just pieces of him and other Things all sewn together by magic in a mess that Should Not Be. It's kinda gross, for magic users, to be around him honestly

Hyrule's magic is strangely tame in comparison. He's fae, he has fae magic. Yes, the Triforce adds some weird crap, but he's just like, super powerful Fae. He is like a troublesome child someone dared to let drive a car; he has resources to end the world, and while he's not inherently bad, you're not sure if you can trust him not to do it "for fun". Like yes, Hyrule is responsible, but that fae part of him is always screaming for trouble.

Warriors' magic is Dangerous. Unlike Sky who is Blatantly Can Kill You, Wars' magic feels like a sleeping dragon. It's not going to hurt you. Yet. It's strong, but it isn't doing anything right now. Get him on the battlefield though and he is Dominating, Magic is surging and threatening and screaming. He has two settings, sleeping and Kill You and there's nothing in between.

Wind's magic is the quietest. His magic is soft, a whisper. It's not because he's weak by any means, but more because his magic is soft and natural and it's just... the wind. The waves. Granted, it can get violent, but unlike the others, Wind has excellent control over his magic because He Has To. the wind needs to keep going even when he's in shock, it has to stay steady even if he's angry, he Can't let it get too strong because it'll blow the ship into danger. Wind's magic is reminiscent of a dancer, fluid and graceful, controlled, but strong.

Legend's magic on the other hand is the most ungodly combination of what the actual crap? Where Time's is like someone took so much and stuffed it together, Legend's is like a house with many windows, and each time you look in a window, there's something different. His magic isn't blatantly Wrong, but it does flicker in and out as New Things. Monster magic? yeah, he's got that. Hylia's magic? Oh, yeah, you can sense that when his emotions are running high. Dream magic? dude is steeped in the stuff, but you have to look to find it. Death magic? Oh yeah better believe it. you touch that lightning scar that runs all over his left side and it's like Death herself is holding your hand. Dude's magic is screwy, but not Scary. His magics are all kinda only see-able by those who are similar, so it chameleons around with people so they can't ever sense anything strongly unless their magic is the same. In which case Oh! Same! Friend! Magic users (ahemHyruleahem) love him to death because he just feels Familiar, but if they could see how Much and Many magics there is, they'd be a little scared.

[b4mpyre-k1zz3s]

i’m not the person who originally asked but part two of cupids chokehold where the jackass boys meet y/n maybe?? if not thats cool!!

Cupid’s Chokehold (Pt. 2)

When a Viva la Bam episode brings the cast back together, the cast finally meet this mystery girl and find out what Bam sees in this woman.

Bam Margera X Fem!Reader, Johnny Knoxville X Fem!Reader

(Fluff)

3.6 Words

Warnings: Suggestive content, drug use, misogyny if you squint, jealousy, clingyness, possessive behavior, tampering with food, injury

An: Thank you so much for the request!! I really try to write my guys as ‘in character’ as posible, but I also find it really fun to explore what kinds of circumstances might make them act otherwise :] Anyways, thank you for sending requests and please keep them coming!

The reason you met the guys in the first place was due mostly in part to a group of MTV executives who, given Steve and Chris’ recent success with Wildboyz and the premiere date of that big movie Knoxville was in creeping closer, thought that now would be the best time for a crossover episode with Bam’s show; consider it a Jackass reunion. This was a shock to you- hell, you thought that the last movie would be the end of Jackass and you could go along with your life following your boyfriend's fifteen seconds running out. But you know how things go: one thing leads to another and all of a sudden you were appearing in living rooms across the country on MTV’s hottest new program: Viva La Bam.

When Johnny, Chris, and Steve (the only cast members MTV wanted for the episode) arrived to the compound of chaos that was Castle Bam, it appeared that their absent host was a bit tied up, far too distracted spreading his lawn and crashing into his buddies on four wheelers to even notice that they were there. At the time, you were in the kitchen watching everything go down, so you scampered outside to wave the guys in. “So we have an empty bed upstairs in the guest room,” you showed them around the castle, taking them through everything they would need to know, “but i think one’a you’s gonna be stuck on the floor for a couple nights…” The whole time you were giving them the tour, there was this collective murmur about this weird lady in Bam’s house; maybe she was his maid or a cleaning lady- or an assistant! But before they could make any further assumptions, there your boyfriend comes in, making his grand entrance clamoring in through the kitchen window. Bam flashed the guys a grin, “Oh! You guys already met Y/N!”

Given how much Bam talked about you, the cast all put together this idea of how they thought you would look, this Frankensteined amalgamation of celebrities: Beyoncé’s face with Pamela Anderson’s tits, legs like Jessica Rabbit (thanks, Chris), and a personality like Bridget from the Girls Next Door. So it’s safe to say that jaws hit the floor. This woman he’s been obsessing over for months is this…normal looking?

The air crackled with charged silence for a moment before Steve, who wasn’t totally with it mentally at that moment thanks to whatever he took before the plane ride there, blurted out what everyone else was thinking, “Wait, that’s Y/N? Like- your girlfriend, Y/N?” “Yeah!” A hint of indignation crept into Bam’s tone at what he was actually asking with that question and his face reflected this as he retorted, “She’s super hot, sweet as hell- and she has got the finest ass I’ve ever seen!” Your boyfriend punctuated his words with an affectionate swat to your behind, and you giggled at his sleazy behavior while all the guys were left wondering what kind of Twilight Zone shit was going on. “Alright, alright!” Still lightly blushing, you hurried them off, “Let’s get you boys settled in before you start trashing the place…”

Given the fact that it was summer, it was a perfect time to film some stuff outside. Due to the juvenile, scripted nature of Viva la Bam, the premise created would’ve fit well in any teen b-movie: Bam was having a pool party with his bros that out of nowhere the Jackass guys happened to crash when they decided to stop by, which leads to him getting revenge via spending the day pranking them- think of it as a CKY vs. Jackass turf war. Ignoring how unrealistic it was, you thought it would make for a pretty entertaining episode.

The sun-kissed opening scene looked straight out of some demented David Hockney painting: Ryan, lounging on a pool chair next to his pile of cans while Raab and Rake tried to drown each other in the pool and Dico quietly tapped away at some handheld gaming system under an umbrella (because the story producers on the show had a tendency to dumb his personality down to ‘liking video games’ when he wasn’t participating in the madness). Speaking of the story producers, it was their idea to put you in that cute little black bikini and those blingy, bug-eyed sunglasses, not that you minded showing off as you tip-toed down the deck steps with an oversized fancy fruit tray in your hands. “Hey boys! I got the-“

Without warning, the guys came charging in, water guns blazing! A cold blast of water courtesy of Knoxville’s super soaker startled you and you let out a dramatic yelp, playing your shock up for the cameras. He yelled across the yard to you with feigned disregard as he redirected his attention to the idiots in the pool, “Sorry, ma’am!” Following close behind was Chris, armed with a Costco-sized bottle of suntan lotion. He was not sorry about absolutely dousing Dunn in the sticky, coconut scented goo with a chuckle, unable to resist a filthy incendio, “Don’t worry, man! It came from a bottle- none’a that homemade stuff!” Not seeming nearly as pissed off as you would expect, Ryan simply groaned, wiping off his eyelids, “Better not be- now I smell like a damn pina colada…” Pontius flashed that sweet dopey grin and continued his attack, splattering some haphazardly across your body as Steve, knew how to make these childish antics look fun, cackled like a madman as henailed Dico from across the pool deck, knocking his handheld out of his hands and leaving it to sputter and fizz on the ground. “Dude! You drenched my GameBoy- my sweet, old-school GameBoy!”

Right as Steve was going to ask who the hell even uses a GameBoy in 2004, guess who came charging out of the house? “What the hell is goin’ on out here?” Padding down the deck stairs in those black swim trunks that sat real low on his hips was your boyfriend, rushing to your side and swiping up a bit of the lotion with his finger to examine. Johnny flashed him that movie star smirk, “Hey, Bam! Nice t’see ya!” Meandering up next to you, it was a scene straight out of some Animal Planet documentary with the two males fighting over the female of the pack, as he leaned in with provocativity heavy in his tone, “I could rub some’a that in if you’d like…” Though Bam was better than Knoxville at dramatizing things for TV, it was clear that there was some real jealousy behind the way he pulled you closer with a hand around your waist as if he couldn’t even stand the thought of another guy near you, “Keep your hands off’a my girl.” He spat, looking him up and down with more than feigned venom in his gaze behind those dark sunglasses, “It’s settled then. This is war!”

That night, the only sounds to be heard from the other side of the door of the dinky little attic/guest bedroom the three of them were all stuffed in tinned fish style was the repetitive thumping of Bam jumping off the second story balcony onto the couch, oniy to run up the stairs and do it all over again. Johnny groaned, leaning his head back into the hard pillows, “God…how does she put up with this?” While your boyfriend banged around the ceiling like some jacked up, oversized moth, you were sitting peacefully on the couch, watching TV as if nothing were amiss. Steve bunched up the jacket he was using as a pillow and sighed from his spot on the floor, “Beats me. Maybe she’s a gold digger or somethin’.” But while Bam is an idiot, he's not dumb enough to fall for some chick who’s just in it for the money. It had to be something else- love? “She’s a saint- that’s what she is...” Johnny shook his head and Chris piped in with his own opinion, “I think she’s hot!”

When he’s not causing chaos and buzzing around like a little kid off five Mellow Yellows, Bam can be quite the sweetheart, especially when it gets late at night and everything dies down, the same way dogs quiet down when you put a blanket on their cage. He’s desperate for your attention normally, but when you’re in his bed, laying by his side, it’s as if all every ounce of ego melts out of his ears. Nuzzling into the crook of your neck the way an overly affectionate cat might, your boyfriend murmured with a lovesick smile plastered on his face, “Mmm…missed you, babe.” This was your nightly routine: Bam, in his flannel pajama pants and no shirt, cuddling up to your side with no regard for personal space and endlessly fussing over you. You let out a breathless chuckle, raking your fingers through his hair, “I was with you all day!” His clinginess bordered on excessive sometimes, but you didn’t mind. There was satisfaction to be found in how whipped he was for you- dead and buried, you had Bam Margera under your thumb, and honestly he wouldn’t have it any other way. Arms slipping around your ribs, he shifted against you with a soft whine, “Yeah, still…”

Just as he was about to feebly defend himself, your boyfriend was cut off by this shriek from next door that could’ve rivaled any horror movie final girl. Guessing this was Bam’s doing, you sat up and whipped your head around, “What the hell was that?” Judging by the mischievous little glint in his eye that shone through the darkness, you guessed right. “Oh yeah- I sent Don Vito over there in his tighty-whities to surprise em’.” You could see it in your head as if you were there: down the hall stumbled Vito, clad solely in his underwear, cracking open the door to the guest room and laying down next to whoever was nearest- in this case, judging by the, “Fuck-fuck fuck, dude!” trailing down the hall, it was Steve. Nobody wants to be woken up by a grown man they’ve never met snuggling up next to them, so you couldn’t really blame him for whatever revenge he may innact, but in your head all you could do was hope they wouldn’t retaliate with something worse that night.

The strike came in the morning, as you groggily blinked awake to your boyfriend's terrified yelps, “Y/N- Y/N! Get the fuck up- I’m not even joking!” You rubbed the blurriness out of your eyes to find him back up against the wall with eyes as wide as gum balls, his chest rising and falling rapidly as he gawked at what sat atop the hurriedly tossed aside sheets on his side of the bed: a garden snake, not longer than one foot in length and perfectly harmless judging by the way the damn thing wasn't really doing anything. Inching along to the door, he tried the handle again, his voice cracking just barely perceptibly, “Dude- dude, this is so not funny! Let me the fuck out.” But all he was met with was snickering as someone on the other end (Chris, you assumed) held it shut. At the same time, you calmly grabbed the snake by the head to gently pick it up and set it outside before returning to Bam, your voice staying soft and level knowing how much this shit gets to him, “There, it’s gone.” But, turning away from him, your calming platitudes turned into you yelling through the plywood, banging, “C’mon, guys! Open the fuckin’ door!” Eventually they relented, and since you were leaning against the door and Bam was clinging to your side, the two of you went tumbling to the floor which you had to admit looked pretty funny on camera. Bam shot a glare at Knoxville who stood with a sheepish grin at Pontius’ side before he stumbled to his feet, “You fuckers are dead!”

A good amount of Bam’s genius prank ideas actually came from you, even if on camera it was made to appear as if he was some evil mastermind of mischief. You got this one- one of your best, actually- after you overheard a conversation between Knoxville and Steve. “God, do I miss April’s cooking... It's a shame our lazy asses slept in so late.” Before Steve could say that it sure beats the gas station coffee and doughnuts they eat on the road while filming, you piped in, “Hey- I could go pick up some burgers if you’d like!” And they just gave you their orders, not expecting anything from you!.

Scampering out of the room and trying to hide your excitement, you let the rest of the CKY crew in on your plan, where it was elected that Dico would be the culinary mastermind behind this operation.

As Raab pulled out of the McDonalds drive through, you and Bam sat in the backseat where he was supposed to be manning the handheld. Supposed to be- because he was dedicating most of his attention to you, staring at you with those big, adoring eyes, “You are a genius, Y/N…” The guys usually tried to keep you apart in case things like this happened. He got snapped out of his fawning by a sharp elbow to the side, courtesy of Rake, “Dude- film the food!” Scrambling with the camcorder, Bam shot over Dico’s shoulder as he began working his magic. Whistling the French Chef theme to himself, he fished around in his pockets for the micleanious continent packets he grabbed from the house and you would’ve thought he was making Coq au Vin with the precision and love you could feels in how he smothered that food in a sloppy mess of grape jelly, sweet n sour sauce, and ranch dressing. Turning to the backseat, Bran held up the double cheeseburger in his hand the way those ladies on QVC show off shitty dinnerware, “Wait, is this Steve-O’s?” Receiving an affirmative, this look of vindictive glee flashed across Dico’s face as he leaned down and spat onto the patty before squishing the top bun on top and wrapping the whole disaster up, proclaiming in a faux French accent, “Bon appetit!”

Ryan was bestowed the honor of delivering the tainted food and also got the privilege of having a front row seat to the golden reactions you were sure you’d get. Speaking with a mouthful of food, Johnny was the first to say anything about it, chewing his burger like unappreciative, doomed cattle, “Hey, something’s kinda…off about these.” Luckily Dunn, who thinks of everything, quickly cobbled together an explanation, “You’re just not used to burgers from Pennsylvania- they’re all like that.” From behind the wall Bam, Dico, and you were hiding, you held back snickers at the hint of suspicion that crept across Knoxville’s features as he turned to Steve, “Doesn’t that taste weird t’you?” You were most excited to see his reaction, but he didn’t really have much of one, quickly scarfing his food down to mumble, “Yeah, but I’m fuckin’ hungry!” To your collective disappointment, the plan didn’t elicit the reactions you anticipated, no matter how cathartic it felt to watch them eat that shit. Nobody was more disappointed than Bam who threw his hands up in frustration and stormed out the back door with a groan, “Fuck it- I’m goin’ skatin’.

Having you around while your boyfriend was skating was both a blessing and a curse. A blessing, because you were his greatest cheerleader and always stared at him with such awe in your eyes, completely enraptured by his skills- which would make anyone feel pretty damn good about themselves. It was a curse, however, in the way that if Bam wasn't totally consumed by what he was doing, his attention was devoted to impressing you to the point he was liable to break something. That’s why he didn’t notice the fact that his trucks were a little loose until the third time he walled off the board and took a nosedive into the plywood.

Right away, you rushed to his side, even though he repeatedly assured you he was fine, “Are you okay, Bam? That last one looked pretty nasty…” Rubbing the spot on his head that bounced off the ramp, he shot you a pained smile, “Yeah- yeah, m’alright…gotta tighten these trucks, though.” Leaning forward, your boyfriend planted a sweet kiss on your cheek before heading inside, “Be right back.” Sitting down at his desk, Bam scrounged around in the drawer that he usually stowed his Alan key in, only for it not to budge. It took a few seconds for it to dawn on him what happened: the damn thing was glued down. Those fuckers…grumbling to himself, he remembered that other board he had set up a couple weeks ago and decided to just deal with the other one later. Which is what he would’ve done, if that one didn’t also have loose trucks.

This required some serious, swift- chemical retribution. But for the time being you needed to play it cool and keep up appearances, so you and the rest of the guys spent the afternoon inside playing video games. You didn’t mind, because you found it hilarious to watch them argue about benign shit. Dico, the Mortal Kombat scholar and by all means a god at that game, was getting his ass handed to him, “Dude- you’re button mashing! That shit isn’t fair.” Bam just snickered, showing his distaste for what was fair and rules in general by doing random combos, not even looking at his hands. Everyone was laughing and enjoying watching him hit five Nut Crackers in a row, when from the bathroom at the far end of the hall, there was this massive boom, as if someone just set off an entire box of illegal fireworks.

Which is what you would’ve assumed happened if it was Bam’s idea, but you knew this plan was Rake’s doing, who spent the greater part of the last hour rigging up a minor explosive device in there which was triggered by lifting the toilet lid. Essentially, if you went to piss, you would be covered in whatever shit was in that device. As indicated by the white powder that coated every inch of Chris as he stumbled out, totally dazed, it was flour. He just chuckled with that ditzy smile on his face, “Woah…” and you knew your plan was a success.

There was only one scene left to film for the episode, and at this point, the guys were barely holding it together. Being in Castle Bam for any amount of time forced Johnny, Chris, and Steve to be on constant high alert, like some kind of torture method that was definately banned by the geneva conventions. The lot of you sat clustered around the dining table, hunched over the food April lovingly cooked for and scarfing it down the way sailors eat on the off chance someone decided to taint yet another meal. Standing up from his food, Johnny looked across the table with bags under his eyes from the constant chaos he had endured over the course of the two days you were filming, “Alright, Bam- I think we’ve done enough pranks to each other and we should just call this whole thing even.” Your boyfriend gave the cameras that malicious look he always did when he had some scheme in mind before he shot Knoxville a diplomatic nod, “Alright. But I don’t think we’re quite even-“ and with that, Bam swiftly grabbed a fist of corn and potatoes and hurled it across the table, and I mean- there’s only so many places that could go. Yep, in seconds, things escalated into an all out food fight, and while laughered roared out and peas and carrots soared through the air, you seemed, yet again, completely unaffected by it.

Once the plates were emptied, Bam stood up with this giddy smile on his face, wiping off a gob of whatever was stuck to his face, “Alright! Let’s go build a bonfire in the backyard!” And without a second thought, everybody flooded out the back door, leaving you with the mess. Well, you and Johnny, who stayed back and had a few questions for you. “I’d hate to intrude, ma’am- but…“ following you into the kitchen, Knoxville carefully phrased his next words, speaking with genuine empathy in his voice, “why on earth do you put up with him? I mean, with all the chaos, and the mess…Bam doesn’t really seem t’pitch in as much as you do.“ Standing up from where you bent under the sink to grab some cleaning supplies, you glanced up at him with a calm, assured smile, “Oh, he’d help out if I asked. Watch-“

Throwing open the back door with a whoosh, you shouted out, “Bam! Come inside and help me clean up!” While you didn’t hear him, you could see your boyfriend say something to the other guys who looked around with confusion plastered on their faces as Bam turned around and dashed up the deck stairs. It was as if you cast some evil spell on their buddy Bam that made him do your bidding, even if your bidding in this case was scrubbing mashed potatoes off of the wall. Still, they followed behind him and let you direct where they needed to help out- he seemed so happy to be with this girl, so they kept their mouths shut and got to cleaning.

[bixels]

How do you pick out colour pallets for your characters? (Specifically the Mane 6 human designs) they're so good!!

I'll stick to the Mane 6 so far.

I paired everyone up first so I can design their colors as duos: Rainbow Dash + Fluttershy, Rarity + AJ, Pinkie + Twilight.

Rainbow and Fluttershy are noisy vs. quiet (visually).

Rainbow Dash obviously needs to be super colorful, but I couldn't go total blow-out rainbow with her, which isn't the goal of the design challenge. To stick to the era, I gave her scarf tie and pants colorful but natural dyed-thread colors: teal, orange, pink, green, and red. The vest, on the other hand, was given the bright primary colors of her rainbow-lightning-bolt cutie mark (the diamond patterns are meant to look like a bolt or explosion). Each character gets an accent color too for shadows, and I gave Rainbow a deep purple to make her skintone pop as much as possible.

Fluttershy's the opposite. I designed her palette to be duochromatic: just rose pink and yellow, with a hint of mint green. All her colors are very desaturated as well, though the yellow clothes help her stand out. Unlike Rainbow, any ornaments in dress come in small places, like lace edges, small butterfly patterns, bows, and earrings, as I feel Fluttershy would still enjoy accessorizing.

Rarity and AJ are cold vs. hot (visually, again).

Rarity's given very artificial, unnatural colors to give an impression of wealth and status. I decided to go with a deep blue rather than purple so she doesn't get mixed with Twilight's palette. I also kept her mostly monochromatic to give the sense of neatness and grace. Her palette is simple enough: pink skin, blue clothes, teal accents. Variations come in the clothing itself: patterns, accessories, fur linings, buttons, etc.

AJ, on the other hand, is given very earthy, warm tones. I actually referenced Minecraft terracotta blocks when designing her.

I made green her primary color since no other character carries it. The red and green's meant to make her look a bit like an apple. Weird note, but I'm really proud of the dark teal in her jeans. It looks great against the orange of her chaps. AJ's palette was surprisingly hard to pin down, as I was afraid the yellow/orange skin-tone, hat, and hair would muddy her face. Had to fiddle with it a lot to get it where I want (oftentimes, the green would make her look like a park ranger), but throwing in a blue shadow accent really helped pull everything together.

Haven't gotten to the last two yet, but Pinkie's is definitely going to be crazy and bright. Here's a sneak peak of it, actually:

Thanks for the ask! I really like talking about my design process.

[lilxmoo]

Little things Amie and Jay did in AC that are actually quite important and I think deserve recognition

KAL👏 NOT 👏 BEING 👏CREEPY 👏 like guys he could have been a weird Jacob from Twilight "i imprinted on you" SO EASILY. But instead, by offering to leave and by always respecting Auri as a person before all else (throughout the whole series btw, it didn't stop once they're together), they actually show that he genuinely loves her rather than just being creepily attached to her against her will. Every step in their relationship is decided by Aurora, giving her full autonomy, but she ALSO asks for consent from him so they don't just assume he's ok with whatever just because they're bonded. It could have been so weird but they dodged that bullet really well

SCARLETT IS NEVER SLUTSHAMEDDD!!! I didn't think about til recently, but having a female character who is sexually active, sexualizes herself and has many partners is never a joke in this series, which is wonderfully refreshing. In fact, it's a subtle but really helpful insight to her character, with her desire to be loved instead of just loving, how detached she feels from her dad and her general desire to experience attachment that she hasn't always received. It's also not something she does simply because "she has to", she genuinely likes it, and that's never painted as a bad thing.

Having a queer character be religious. The whole United Faith thing is never really explored (which is probably good, it could have gotten way too political way too quick), but it's clearly inspired by Christianity. With Finian being both part of what is essentially a Christian and also a bisexual man is such good subtle representation that I WISHH there was more of in media. Just a silent acknowledgement of, "hey, these things don't have to be separate, being both is ok "

No alien species is wrong, and no conflict has a clear right side. Again, kinda under explored for the sake of trying to not be super political, but there is a silent yet pretty pointed show that every conflict is pretty grey. They don't justify murder or racism, but they kinda show, "hey, terrans and Syldrathi BOTH did good and bad things in this war. Terra attacked innocent Syldrathi, but Jericho Jones was a peacemaker. The Syldrathi did not ask for war, but Caersan was still a mass murderer anyways." Just an extra tiny layer of depth which helps with it feeling more real.

Subverting the, "I can fix him/her" trope. The characters aren't "fixed" by their love interests. Their growth is inspired by their partners, but also by their friends and experiences, which is much nicer. They say, "you CAN'T fix them. But you can encourage them to grow", and I really like that, I think its much healthier.

Neurodivergency. I'm not sure if Zila is actually meant to be autistic, but as someone on the spectrum myself, I definitely see her there. And her not understanding social ques isn't painted as something she needs to learn, it's painted as something EVERYONE ELSE needs to accept. Not change themselves for, that's important, but accept. Whenever someone criticizes her for her lack of social awareness, it's not a joke or a narrative criticism of her, etc the "You understand how everything works except other people" line. If anything, they are showing us that she does have feelings, that empathy is still important for her even if that's not something that's actively shown, and that these types of statements are hurtful, not helpful.

Trauma has consequences. Amie and Jay have talked about this in interviews, but they have always said that they stop believing a story when a character dies and then everyone just moves on, because that's not realistic. And that really helps the story and characters feel believable. Cat's death isn't only shown through Tyler being kinda sad. Every single character grieves her, not because they were close but because they knew her, which is very realistic, and for Tyler specifically she quite literally haunts his narrative, just like real death does, especially of such a violent kind. His grief drives him to make decisions which end up changing the course of the story, as does Kal's trauma with his dad, and everyone's past experiences, they all matter, and drive the storyline forward. Very realistic and very well-done.

They end the story where it needs to end. I'm a big advocate for not stretching out stories beyond where they need to go, and they do it well. Like, it's a sci fi space opera, they could've made it fifteen books long if they wanted, or made sure they had enough books for every squad member to have a cover of their own (which i wouldve loved to see, but anyways), but instead they said, "this is where and how it needs to end, and we're not gonna milk it."

Representation is subtle. The best kind, in my opinion, is when it feels real, and here it does. Fin and zila aren't constantly discussing being queer, they just have a conversation about if Saedii is hot, similar to Scarlett teasing Auri about Kal. Aurora being half Chinese isn't more important than her being half Irish, they both matter but neither overshadow her as a person. They become reminders of home, not reminders of her differences.

This was WAYYY too long, I apologize, but I was tryna think on why this story doesn't feel weird where in a lot of places it normally would. So here's my ramblings :D (noone is gonna care but oh well I put it out somewhere lol) anyway amie and jay know how to write surprise surprise

[linkeduniverse-writing]

General LU Headcanons part 1

Heya! So I'm starting this blog with some general headcanons about the boys, I think I'll divide it in three parts so it's not too long. First up are Four, Hyrule, and Legend! Hope you enjoy :D

Part 2 Part 3

Four

It takes him so long to emerge from sleep

Like he'll be in a haze for like 20 minutes, not able to form any coherent thoughts

Which is kind of a surprise because he's one of the early risers, and is super reactive once fully awake

He tends to talk to himself a lot, mostly when he does something or thinks through a problem

It's mostly to exteriorize all the noise inside his head tho

The others aren't as weirded out by it than he feared, and he's thankful for it

Whenever they're in a market or just in a town, he always finds himself drawn to craftsmanship

Like if they need to interrogate people about monsters and stuff, he'll go ask artisans mostly

He feels more comfortable around them

It feels like home

Also he likes to compare his work to other blacksmith's

He feels like he has a lot to learn still, and he's very curious about how the craft has evolved with time

He doesn't know first aid and the scent of blood makes him sick, but if his teammates need tending he'll do his best

He tries to see their wounds as metal work needing repairs

It helps him keep his cool

But he'd rather leave it to someone else

Hyrule

Another early riser, but he hates it

He loves sleeping in and wishes his body would let him sometimes

But oh well, when it's time to wake up it's time to wake up

He's a very light sleeper too, like the wind blowing in the leaves above would wake him up

He hates it

Botany nerd

Loves keeping track of the new plants he finds along the way

He always asks the Link from the Hyrule they're in if he knows about it, and will pick them up if he can't get an answer, to study them later hopefully

He rarely can, but when they have a moment he'll either find a plant book (and a Link who can read it for him) or straight up ask someone if they know about the plant

He's always so polite and genuinely curious, people can't help but answer

He accidentally set Sky's stuff on fire once when showing off his fire magic to Wind

Sky was too impressed to truly be mad at him tho

(Also Hyrule replaced all of the stuff that couldn't be repaired, don't ask him how)

He doesn't mind blood and grime and gore, but can't handle anything with maggots in it

He'll stitch up anything, he'll put bones back in place if necessary, but one bug? In a wound? Don't count on him

He can keep his calm even before the grossest injuries, which is why he's often fixing up the others after a fight

He rarely uses his healing magic tho, he knows he'll tire too easily, and he can't help them if he can barely stay awake

So potions potions potions

He's a gentle caregiver but you better do as he says when you're hurt

Legend

A heavy sleeper, and he dreams a lot, but he never remember them

Probably for the best if you ask him

He usually wakes late, but never truly rested unfortunately

That never stoped him from being immediately efficient and fully awake tho

He knows he has a reputation of being sharp and closed off, but he's a really good listener

He's the kind of person curse the world with you when you vent until you're in the right headspace to find a solution

He kind of encourages the others in their dumbest ideas just to see what'll happen

(not the too dangerous ones, of course)

But he's curious, and after all the adventures he's been through, he believes that if he survived all of this, surely Wild will survive trying to cook a bomb flower

He did, but Twilight almost died of stress

He's the one who helps Warrior with refilling their inventory when they're low on supplies

He's a great negotiator and can get them twice the supplies for the same price

He's sometimes even charming enough to get them all a free meal

It's his favorite skill

He doesn't mind blood but will not look at broken limbs

Not his own, not other's

He tries to keep his cool around the others to not make them panic, but he really hates broken bones

If one of them is hurt, he'll try to distract them and make sure they have water and enough heat

He'll also keep them in place if they move around too much for Hyrule or Warrior to work on them

He's not gentle, but he's still reassuring somehow