#but also there's not enough to fix to warrant a remake

[timegears-moved]

i'm anti-explorers remake i really do not want an explorers remake (<- guy who will still buy an explorers remake)

[justlikejohn]

how r u feeling about p3 reload

hello oh my god im so glad you asked.

i. am. so. goddamn. HYPED!! p3 is my favourite game full stop so im so excited for the fandom revival and the new content and the new discussions and seeing what theyve changed and what theyve kept the same and shit... any excuse to replay persona 3 is a good excuse in my book

however. i am not sure that persona 3 warrants a "reload"? not in a negative way: i just think that a pc release that included overworld FES aspects and the answer as WELL as FeMC and direct control of party members would have satisfied people more than a "reload". i was secretly looking forward to a persona 6 release announcement, and to see a remaster of a game that i think still holds up (and was just inaccessible to players) is a little disappointing :p

a lot of the appeal of p3 to me is how .. dated it is, in a way? its SO 2000s with the mp3 players and the fashion and it just aligns so much with what was "cool" then. i love it! im not sure if the reboot will go for that "retro" look, since its trying very hard to emulate the persona 5 style (which imo is very modern and cool, with all the stark contrast and black shading..) ultimately a more modern look would not be a negative, just different!

i am SO ATTACHED (so attached.) to the original voice actors. vic mignogna as junpei iori is what hooked me in the first place because he just has such a phenomenal energy that he brings to the character! like. i prefer og fuuka (paula tiso, i think?) and i hated seeing her replaced in sequel games :(( i LOVE the original english cast. i dont know enough about the new VAs to judge their abilities, but it will be REALLY weird to see a persona 3 without the original english cast! ill probably be curmudgeonly about the new cast upon seeing their performance, sorry in advance 😅

i still have my fingers crossed for FeMC!! :'3c shes my favourite.

i HATE the new sprites. where is the character. the style. why is it so bland now :( why does junpei look so ugly. give me back my boy. why do the look like, contorted in that weird AI art way?

i LOVE the new 3D models. aigis is so BEAUTIFUL. yukari and the MC look fantastic too..... wahhhh the models and the environments pop so well! i love the city aesthetics of p3 and a good 3D environment will lend itself so well to the clean, metallic, imposing look of tatsumi port island.......

i also find the janky-ness of persona 3 (original) very endearing. i love how strega is so LAME and that they seem to have very little plot presence, i love the lower poly models, i love the cheese of the plot and death motifs. i wonder how the remake will approach this jank! battling/dungeon crawling will probably be vastly improved (yay!) but im not sure how id feel about "fixing" the problems of the story! if they clean up the story - fixing pacing, honing character arcs, redoing cheesy dialogue - it smooths what is a raw and edgy and deeply emotional story! im not sure id like a "smoothed" persona 3 experience! then again, why remake a game to keep every piece of dialogue and every event exactly the same? it would be weird for them not to change the story! this is a very big dilemma for me :0

so yah there! :)) overall, excited for the fandom revival but not sure that persona 3 needed a remake rather than a definitive release. please, if anyone has anything to add i would love to hear what you all think! :)))

[brazenautomaton]

Fixing Afterlives: the Shadowlands

This is my “fixing stories” for WoW’s latest expansion, Shadowlands. Due to overwhelming popular demand, by which I mean @shieldfoss and @bhikshu I’ll go into why this is dumb and how they could have done something instead of choosing to do nothing.

I will work under similar constraints to my Heart of the Swarm rework. I magically became Creative Director of WoW just for Shadowlands, so I cannot alter any of the plot of BFA or Legion or anything that came before. The concept art is done and asset creation is proceeding and I can’t change the overall structure or aesthetics of anything, just how the story is implemented. 

Minute one, what you need to do to make this expansion work is sit down and figure out what it’s About. Now, a MMO expansion doesn’t really need a driving central theme, though it can help, and it’s allowed to be “a bunch of stuff that happened” because it needs random-ass side plot bullshit going on. But the tagline is “Brave the Beyond”, this is the AFTERLIFE, this is where we go when we die and the world of the soul -- we need to be dealing with things bigger than us, bigger than the concept of us. Fundamental and About something because they are mythic incarnations of what kind of life you can live and what kind of world exists. 

We’ll still have an About in the traditional sense though. It doesn’t have to unify everything, but it’s good to have a bit of a through-line to define the main conflict. And also, there’s a certain point where characters need to stop saying “The Jailer… speaks true…” and fucking tell us what he says and WoW passed it long ago. Our About is a central question about the Jailer, and the broader notion of Hell represented by the Maw: “Is it possible for someone to do something so horrific that they deserve infinite punishment?”

And it’s funny, you know, you see JJ Abrams talk about the “mystery box”, and when he explains it, it makes perfect sense: a mystery that is central to the story but is never answered because it represents infinite possibility until it is revealed. And told in that way, that makes sense, that can be very good! Except Abrams never does that, he always ends up having to reveal the contents of the mystery box which by his own logic can never end in anything but disappointment. So I can’t say we will have a mystery box, but we will have a central mystery that we know will never be answered: what did the Jailer do to deserve the Maw? All we know is it is incomprehensibly horrible. Like our mortal minds would literally be unable to process it, even trying to understand it would harm us. So this isn’t “nah he’s bad trust us” we need characters who DO know to really, really sell it. Emotional reactions of anger and revulsion and helplessness, and absolutely nobody whether opposed or allied with the Jailer can deny his evil or say it wasn’t that bad. When you ask Devos about it, Devos shudders in fear and disgust, but says it doesn’t matter. If the question was “how bad was the Jailer’s crime” then we’d need to know what it is; if the question is “is it possible to have ANY crime bad enough to warrant his punishment” then we don’t.

Minute two, you need to know how the Shadowlands works. Because they made it just another continent and that doesn’t make any sense at all. What kind of candy-ass warrior afterlife gives you one life and then your soul is destroyed? How does it make sense for characters to call you “mortal” when they die just as hard and in fact you are superior because you haven’t used your extra life yet? Fuck how are necromancers a thing in Maldraxxus, if your soul is obliterated when you die in the Shadowlands WHAT ARE THEY CALLING BACK?

So none of that bullshit. You don’t die in the Shadowlands, at least not without a lot of work. Souls are anima, and the tide of dead souls flowing into the realms of the Shadowlands is a flow of anima, because everything is anima. Anima is the force of significance and permanence.  Anima is what makes up shadow and substance, things and ideas. Anima is the weight of being About something, anything. You don’t die in the Shadowlands by having your body stabbed to death. You will continue to exist, slightly weaker. You die in the Shadowlands when there is nothing left to the concept of “you”. When you are utterly forgotten and what you are is “nothing”. This is how we get those Unraveling Soul Fragments in Torghast: they are souls tortured so much there is no longer a self there, just a concept of misery. That’s extremely, extremely evil. Is it possible to commit a crime so heinous it deserves infinite punishment? If not, is there a crime so awful that it would be unimaginable to inflict it even on its perpetrator?

We also have three major antagonists we need to know.

One of them is Sire Denathrius, who is just fucking perfect the way he is, we love you Denny.

One of them is Sylvanas Windrunner. Sylvanas needs to stay in character: an absolutely remorseless piece of shit with no sense of right and wrong but who does productive things because they benefit her and who is extremely cunning to know how to work an angle to her ends. She’s too smart to get lied to by the Jailer and she’s too smart to go Full Evil but not only is anything less than that completely fair game, she doesn’t get why you have a problem with it. She has allied with the Jailer because there is one thing she absolutely wants to do and only she can do and she can only do with the Jailer: she wants to break him out because in doing so the hold of the Maw is shattered and now anyone can escape. The Maw stops being a prison once the Jailer escapes. And she wants that because she knows she’s got a one-way express ticket to the Maw when she finally runs out of extra lives. She knows she is a selfish, terrible, murderous, monstrous person. Does that warrant infinite punishment? In her heart she is convinced it does, so she’d prefer to make the question irrelevant before she has to find out. She is sympathetic to the pain she is inflicting on others, because it is like the pain she has felt. But she won’t stop. She knew she endured it, so you can take one for the team.

The Jailer is super super super super evil. If we remake him to be obviously in pain and lashing out in fear, he won’t WORK. He needs to be ominous and menacing and say “your soul is mine” and that kind of shit. We will be able to generate sympathy for Sylvanas, we shouldn’t try to do it to the Jailer. He is the victim of the ultimate injustice, but also perpetrator of the ultimate atrocity. He’s not sorry at all. The fact that he has raised a philosophical question about the nature of punishment is just a nice side effect of him saying things to people to get what he wants, which is to break out and inflict tyranny and suffering. Sylvanas is not tricked by him into thinking he only wants freedom, she has a plan that has his true motives in mind. What dimension do we give him so he won’t be flat while still being completely one-dimensionally evil? He resents you. He doesn’t lash out and scream his emotions and say it’s not fair that you have what he was denied freedom. But he resents you. A little ribbon of resentment threaded through his speech to you. He’s subtly insulted by the fact you exist. He doesn’t merely relish your suffering, he relishes your failure, your realization of weakness. He doesn’t pull an Azmodan and say “okay well NOW this trap is inescapable despite you escaping the last twenty!”, he knows you’re probably going to break free of things and escape. But he doesn’t care that this trap didn’t catch you, catching you would just be a bonus. He cares that he hurt you and made you feel inferior and the inevitable doom encroaches just a bit more on you. That is the source of his sinister satisfaction and confidence. He doesn’t announce an ambush and say “now you will never escape and your soul is mine,” he announces it by saying how weak and stupid you are to fall for it.

His victory is inevitable because Death is inevitable. He doesn’t care what temporary victories you earn; he doesn’t bother trying to convince you they are only a setback. He’s going to have you eventually and you’re going to suffer on the way. What a fucking dick.

[tinalbion]

I saw that you are writing for chucky of the 2019 remake, that's awesome! Can you write something really cute with Chucky and the reader? I really love your blog btw 💜💜💜

Ahh, thank you very much! I do love the way the reimagining handled this generation of Chucky, although as you know, Charles Lee Ray is my SHIT and I love the original concept. But it was just so fun? I’ll definitely write something cute for you!

But omg I love you, thank you for supporting my blog 🥺

Buddi!Chucky Cute Headcanons

When you had first gotten the doll by accident, it wasn’t your intention to keep it, it just kind of showed up at your place one day. You figured since you were new in the building that you’d still get the old residents’ mail for a while before the post office actually paid attention to the name change, but something as large as this package was almost too much to be an accident. It wasn’t addressed to anyone in particular, but when you opened it, you definitely knew it wasn’t yours. 

It was already powered on somehow and it scared the living hell out of you when it decided to move on its own, your eyes wide in fear at the realization that this could be the doll, this could be the one that was centered around all of those murders. You needed to get rid of it right away and needed to keep yourself safe, but as soon as you had tried to reach the kitchen for any sort of knife, the doll was already standing in the center of the room, his eyes flickering back and forth from a bright blue to an intense red. His expression seemed...rather confused more than anything. If he was a killing machine, he sure didn’t seem like it.

Stuck between bolting to safety and remaining where you were, the doll finally aid its eye on you and tilted its head in a quizzical way. “Who are you?” he asked, his hand twitching ever so slightly. You weren’t sure how to really answer, so while keeping your distance and remaining on high alert, your face softened. “I’m Y/N, this is my apartment, I just moved in a few months ago.” Your voice was calm and level as you looked down at the sentient doll, his movements almost mimicking that of a human’s. You were terrified that this could be the very same one, but you hoped and prayed to yourself that it wasn’t.

“So… Andy doesn’t live here anymore?” the doll asked, his voice almost sounding strained. He seemed sad now that you had told him you lived here, which made you rethink your position near the kitchen. With a sigh, you knelt down on one knee and shrugged. “I’m sorry, I wish I knew what to say,” He seemed to pull away from the situation and wander around the apartment, checking out what had been new and what seemed familiar. “Did you used to live here with someone?” you asked curiously.

Chucky didn’t answer at first, he was trying to process everything and remember. “Andy. I used to live with Andy, we were best friends.” His voice trailed off as he continued to look around, but it slowly registered with him that his friend was gone, everything that had happened would not change the fact that Chucky had done something to warrant their moving out. His circuits and parts had been heavily damaged but somehow saved, yet Chucky awoke to no one there, so his first instinct was to find Andy. He was gone. The times they shared were gone. 

In the middle of the living room that seemed all too familiar and yet so different, he just sat down on the floor and stared off, most of his memories were completely gone due to the incredible damage he took, but there had been some images backed up that he usually looked through ever since coming back. He didn’t even mind that he was in a stranger’s home now, what else would he do? You stood up and walked over slowly toward him, your head tilted to the side, surveying him. “Hey, I know uh, wow," you groaned and slapped your palm against your head. "I'm talking to a doll, I've officially lost it." He looked up at you and waited like he knew you were doing your best not to lose your cool. "You can stay here if you want, just don't do anything weird, like try to kill me. Deal?" You had hoped he'd understand that it wasn't anything personal but you hadn't really been a doll person, to begin with, so this was a huge step to take as it was. 

Chucky looked at you for another moment and pondered your words as if he were truly mulling them over. You couldn’t lie; you were intrigued with him and could only imagine what was going on in his head if he could...you know, think for himself. From that moment on, he promised you that he would be on his best behavior and seemed more like an interesting companion rather than a killer doll. You knew very well that that could all flip on a dime and would constantly think of backup plans if things really did go south, but so long as he kept in line, so would you. He'd start off by asking how you slept, asking about anything and everything about yourself so he could know you better. It was rather sweet to you, you enjoyed the company he offered, even when you were just watching TV or playing a game. 

One day, he attempted to wake you up with a fully made breakfast when all he did was absolutely destroy the kitchen, but it was the thought that counts and you thanked him anyway. Another day, you came home from being out and he was by the door the entire time, awaiting your return with a picture he had drawn of him and yourself. It was adorable, so much so that you hung it on the fridge. Every day that passed, he didn't seem like the killer doll that was widespread all across the news, but maybe with the damage he had received, that part of the circuit board was possibly fixed somehow? Whatever it was, you made sure to keep the environment as calming and stress-free as possible so you wouldn’t end up like the massacred victims you’ve seen plastered all over the news. 

It seemed that as the days passed, the doll had forgotten all about why he was brought back in the first place, he was rather occupied with hanging out with you. He would always ask if he could help you with anything or if you could both possibly play a game of sorts. You would more than usually oblige and do random things with him throughout the day if it didn’t interfere with your work or your nightly routine. He would even ask to help with that as well, assisting you by handing you items you required and just watching you do whatever it is you would do. 

In the end, you were actually happy that you stumbled upon him and he decided to stay. Maybe that Andy kid just wasn’t grateful enough to have something or someone, like him in his life. Whatever the reason, you continued to live your life fully one day at a time with Chucky next to you, always having a blast with him and even taking him on road trips with you. He was always curious, much like a child, but there was also that fierce protective streak in him that didn’t die out You couldn’t have asked for better intervention. 

[teaveetamer]

So I started thinking about how the Switch Gen 4 remake won’t feature the Poketch anymore (RIP one of the best uses of the bottom screen). So for fun I’m doing a ranking of:

The best uses of the bottom screen in the DS/3DS era Pokémon games.

(For the record I expect absolutely none of these rankings to be controversial but we’ll see).

1) Omega Ruby and Alpha Sapphire (PokeNav Plus)

The bottom screen functionality with the PokeNav was just superb. First we have AreaNav, and not only does it give you a map, but it tells you which trainers want a rematch, which areas have berries ready to harvest, secret base info, which Pokémon can be found in the area, and you can conveniently just tap it to fly around.

And if that wasn’t enough you have the DexNav function, which allows you to easily track which Pokémon you have and haven’t caught in an area and adds some neat functionality to help with catching ‘mons you’ve already caught and obtaining hidden abilities and shinies.

Basically it does everything a good bottom screen should do: give you an easy shortcut to do things instead of constant menuing and provide you with vital information at a glance.

2) Diamond, Pearl, and Platinum (Poketch)

(This one was really close to first, by the way)

The Poketch was an amazing, if a bit clunky, tool. I didn’t fully utilize it when I first played the game (mostly because I was a kid at the time and didn’t quiiiiite understand how useful it was) but it’s literally invaluable. A clock, a calculator, memo pad, pedometer, dowsing machine, berry tracker, type matchup checker, you name it and there’s probably an app for it.

I’d rate it slightly over the PokeNav because it features a lot of apps that do things you’d normally have to go see an NPC for. No constant flying to Verdanturf to check your friendship or being chained to Solaceon town to see if you’ve got eggs ready, for example.

There’s two reasons I put it below ORAS though.

There are apps that, while fun, are completely useless (e.g. coin flip). This was particularly obnoxious in Diamond and Pearl because the Poketch could only switch apps one way, so if you accidentally skipped the app you wanted to use you had to cycle aaaaall the way back around. Not a huge deal at the beginning of the game but if you have all 25 or so apps it’s tedious. Thankfully this was fixed in Platinum.

Apps can be a little obscure to obtain and easy to miss. Some of them are even locked to post game, which sort of defeats the purpose unless you intend to play a lot after you’ve beaten the game.

3) HeartGold and SoulSilver (Menu, Run Button, Registered Items)

Heart Gold and Soul Silver had some nice functionality, even if it wasn’t as flashy as ORAS or DPPt. Having the menu on the bottom screen at all times, to easily click into the bag or wherever you needed, was nice. What really made it stand out was the extra functionality it had. The run button, for easy one handed grinding, is one of the more beloved things. This was also the first game that allowed for multiple registered items (two, doesn’t hold a candle to what Black and White did but it was a game changer for the time)

4) X and Y (Pokemon-Amie, Super Training, and the Player Search System)

If I could put a dividing line here then hoooo boy I would. From here down I really don’t think any of these games utilized their bottom screens well, it’s just a matter of picking the least bad ones.

Now credit where it’s due, the PSS did give easy access to the GTS of the time, but otherwise it’s only really useful if you do a lot of online competitive stuff (which, personally, I did not). Super Training was also incredibly useful for easily EV training your Pokémon (which, granted, I did not do a lot of because Pokémon games are easy enough without that). Pokémon-Amie is a very cute distraction, though not one I would give up my entire bottom screen for to have it at the ready.

It’s not necessarily that these are bad features, it’s just that they’re all extremely optional and they could have done so much more with it. And we see how much more they did with it in ORAS, where all three of these functions are included on top of the Area and DexNav functionality!

5) Black, White, Black 2, and White 2 (C Gear)

A massive step down from Gen 4 to say the least. It’s kind of a rudimentary PSS, but it only works with people in your immediate area (which means it’s completely useless unless you have people nearby also playing these games at the same time as you). That’s basically all it does.

The coolest thing was changing the skins, but apparently as of 2014 you can no longer do that since they tied that to their now defunct online servers for these games.

6) Sun, Moon, Ultra Sun, and Ultra Moon (Rotom Dex)

Somehow the last 3DS game also managed to have the most garbage bottom screen of them all. It’s basically a glorified map showing you exactly where you are in real time, in a series where routes and towns are not complicated enough to warrant such a function. It’s only other use is basically to be a quick button to your pokedex and to give you hints.

Ultra Sun and Ultra Moon did absolutely nothing to improve on this. Instead of adding more functionality or features, they gave the Rotom dex a relationship score (?) and “more personality” which is... yeah not what I use my bottom screen for guys. Also I didn’t even realize it existed until I was making this list and looked the thing up to make sure I covered all of the features.

[megfloresprotectionsquad]

At some point, I really need an eva season to have a moment where someone compliments her skills in contrast to the scene where isak and jonas make fun of her grades, i hate that part :(

I think almost all remakes do their Eva season dirty. Almost none of it is ever original enough to warrant being praised compared to future seasons and they usually never do more with the content given. like you have so much to build off of and no remake ever...does? the only ones that do switch some stuff up is españa and austin. austin i appreciated the change of pace for parts of eva's normal story like her dynamics w the boy squad are really unique because of shay being isak and tyler hating her (lmao), as well as her and abby are treated w respect to real female friendships. the show actually bothers to fix their relationship and make them more warm towards each other again by season two which i adored.

no remake also ever really plays with eva's base personality. i think maybe meg and emma from france are the only ones who have subtly unique but very "eva" personalities (i especially like emma in later seasons!). We play around with Nooras, Isaks, and Sanas all the time. Why don't we give that respect to the Evas?

[everydisneymovie]

Review #55: The Parent Trap

Post #60

9/6/2020

Next up is 1961′s The Parent Trap.

Enjoyment : [4]

I am sad to report that this movie is rather boring. The gags can occasionally be funny but there is not a lot of character motivation to make them more than shallow chuckles. Susan and Sharon have some individuality but as it goes on they basically become functionally the same person ironically. The adults never get enough depth to warrant investment and so the emotional moments don’t really land with the proper weight. Overall I think this movies biggest sin is just how boring it ends up. We jump between Susan and Sharon far too often in the first half for them to bond with their estranged parents, and then we don’t get enough time with the parents reunited to rekindle their romance. It is all just so shallow.

Quality : [3]

This movie is very sloppily made. The biggest sin is just how poorly the actor doubling is. They didn’t hire actual twins they had one child actor, and a body double in a wig. There are several shots where you can see the body doubles face and the split screen effect is nothing to write home about. When you realize that one twins face is always obscured by something, you can never unsee it. Why not just hire actual twins? You may ask. Keep in mind Hayley Mills was already in a Disney movie and probably had a fixed payment contract, so it was cheaper to just hire a low paid extra in a wig than find new actors and write up new contracts. The rest of the movie isn’t anything special either. The editing is very basic and there is no motivation behind the camera. Overall a very dull movie from a technical sense.

Hold up : [2]

This movie opens with the line“Bless our broken home!” and I remember saying to myself “They better not say that divorce is always a mistake” and... yeah that’s kinda where the movie lands on the subject, save one brief conversation that is quickly proven wrong. There is also a pretty racist moment where they focus on  dressing up like a “gypsy” and it lasts about 10 seconds but was evidently important enough to make it into the wikipedia synopsis. Also, this movie really hates women. Vicky is shown to be a scheming gold digger trying to steal the dad’s money. However, at no point do any of the character get actual proof that she is a gold digger. They just hate her and play mean pranks on her and say really hateful stuff to her purely based on a hunch. They could have solved this with one scene of the twins overhearing Vicky talking about her evil plan (she monologues several times.) But this never happens. They just hate her because she is young, blonde and hot. It came across as really weird and specifically degrading in a very sexist way. It actually makes the protagonists really unlikable since they have very little justification for their actions beyond jealousy.

Risk : [4]

This movie remains very comfortably on the side of traditional marriage between a man and woman. The adults come across as very complex because they frankly state why their relationship didn’t work out, but then just decide to get remarried without any real change on either persons part. The comedy is not very subversive and the plot is very pedestrian. I feel like this was a step back from some of the previous live action movies. At least Pollyanna had a lovely aesthetic and Absent Minded Professor had it’s charm. This movie doesn’t really have anything to say.

Extra Credit : [1]

The pranks at the start are kinda funny, but honestly I laughed more at the bad effects than any actual joke.

Final thoughts:

It’s funny, thinking about how Absent Minded Professor and The Parent Trap came out back to back, and both got remakes. I am going to make a prediction right now, that the remake of Absent Minded Professor will not be as good as the original, and the remake of The Parent Trap will be superior to the original. The three biggest issues with this movie are as follows: The effects are bad in a very un-charming way, since they come across as lazy and not just low quality. Next is how the movie feels very defensive of traditional marriage. It always feels like the movie WANTS to declare that divorce is pure evil, but also knows it can’t come out and just say that. The last issue is how mean spirited the treatment of Vicky ends up coming across. An evil villain getting humiliated is fine, but only if the heroes KNOW they are the villain. Imagine watching Superman beat a random stranger to death because he “felt like it” even if that stranger is revealed to be a super villain. It feels like that to me.  I also want to say, that divorce is not always a bad thing. Sure it sucks when it happens but if a relationship makes one or both parties unhappy, you are in no obligation to stay even it would be ‘easier’ for the kids. Divorces are not just little ‘oopsies’ that you can later undo, they usually have legitimate reasons to happen. They should have put more effort into showing the mom and dad growing as people who can be in a relationship again, not just “I guess we should give it another shot because we are still in love.” Like they both still love each other and both still want to be in a relationship despite not having changed at all? Then why did they get a divorce in the first place? Didn’t intend to rant but that specific aspect really bugged me. Media tends to frame divorced characters as “going to end up back together eventually” and that is not how it goes in real life. Having the kids learn that their parents are wonderful individuals and that them getting back together is not realistic would have been a way better narrative.

Total Score: 14/50

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[oops-supercorptrash]

4x17 and Insight into 5x08

since tumblr deleted my post that i spent an HOUR working on, i have to rewrite it. I rewatched 4x17 and i feel like it really gives some insight into why Lena responded to Kara the way she did, and why Alex treated Lena the way she did in 5x08. Spoilers for both episodes under the cut, obviously. Trigger warning for abuse.

The episode starts with Alex coming to rescue Lena after she was drugged by Lex and tied to her office chair. Alex and a DEO agent rush to Lena to ensure that she is safe and alive, and Alex unties her. The DEO agent then hands her a letter that is addressed “Lena”. Alex then leaves Lena and steps away to open and read the letter. Not only is this a violation of the Fourth Amendment as Alex is there under DEO orders and there is no probable cause to think that a document addressed to Lena on her work desk would be in any way related to her kidnapping, but it’s also a violation of Lena’s trust. Alex had no right to read something that was written to Lena, and Lena never even gets to read the actual letter. Also, one would think that Alex would be more concerned about her friend rather than a letter that can be read at any time. 

Moving on, Kara returns to the DEO to offer her help searching for Lex. She and Alex decide to talk to Lena to try and get as much information about Eve as possible. When Kara turns to leave, however, Alex points out that Lena has been through trauma and she and Supergirl aren’t on the best of terms. Kara catches Brainy’s eye, who also looks sad for Kara’s damaged relationship with Lena, and agrees to let Alex go speak to Lena alone. Alex shows up at Lena’s office, goes inside, and reads a file off of Lena’s desk. Lena walks in and catches her, and Alex throws down the file and says “There you are. I went to look for you at the hospital and they said you already left.” Lena looks around at her scattered files and says, “I thought the FBI already went through all this. Have you changed your mind about me?”. Alex had no warrant, no probable cause, not even friendly justification behind searching through Lena’s files while she wasn’t there and not informed of the search. Alex didn’t even know Lena would be at her office. For all she knew, Lena would have made her way back to her apartment since she just went through a kidnapping. And Lena’s the one who apologizes when it was Alex going through her stuff!

Back peddling a bit, before Lena arrives at her office, she visits Lillian in prison.  Lillian begins the meeting with, “The reports say you were knocked unconscious. You were always prone to migraines. Is your head okay?”. This instantly trivializes the trauma that Lena just went through, gaslighting her and making Lena feel as if she was dramatizing the entire ordeal. When Lena tries to cut through the bull, Lillian follows up with: “Do you have to be so emotional? It’s disappointing.” She again hits Lena where she knows will hurt her. To further drive home her point, Lillian hits her with “I know you’re upset Lex outsmarted you.” She even mocks that he hurt her “poor little heart”, to which Lena replies “Well, at least I have a heart.” Lillian brushes this off yet again, claiming it’s an overrated organ that’s been romanticized by poets and frivolous women. Lillian then questions why Lena never accepted Lex’s many offers to work with him. Lena instantly responds “I will never be on the same side as you and Lex.”. Lillian knows this, of course, but chooses to mock her again, saying “Of course not. The only side you’ll ever be on is the side of your friends.”  pointing out the Danvers sisters as her first example. She continues, “Oh, what those besties would think if they knew what you’ve really been up to.” referring the weeks helping Lex and experimenting with the Harun-El. Keep in mind that Lillian is fully aware of Supergirl’s true identity. She’s beginning to drive the wedge between Kara, Supergirl, and Lena by pointing out that Supergirl will never forgive her for working with such a dangerous device and helping Superman’s worst enemy. Lillian is also playing on Lena’s fear of abandonment, something we know Lex has done many times in the past when they were growing up. Lillian knows Lena’s biggest fear is to be hated by her friends. “I can smell your fear, Lena. Doing everything in your power to make sure your friends never find out your complicity. They would hate you. Then you’d find yourself utterly alone. Again.” It’s obvious the tactic is working. Lena’s lip is trembling just slightly, and her eyes shine with tears. She lashes out, jumping up and snapping “This is foolish.” to try and claim that Lillian’s words have no effect on her. Tears nearly falling, Lena claims Lillian doesn’t know anything because Lex deserted her, too. But, with a smug smile, Lillian merely says, “I may be in prison, but I’m not the one who’s going to be deserted.” Knowing she’s lost, Lena turns and leaves before she can lose control of her emotions. 

This is why Lena reacts to Kara’s secret in the way that she does. Lillian has spent most of Lena’s life convincing her that no one but the Luthors’ will want her, that she’s evil and all her friends hate her to keep her complacent and willing to help them with their nefarious plots. But Lena argues with her, claims that Kara and Alex would never hate her, that they’d never keep things from her. This is because out of all of their friends, Lena wanted Kara to be the one friend that proved Lillian wrong. That despite whatever Lillian said, Kara would never hate her simply because of her last name. So when Kara’s betrayal came to light, Lena was absolutely crushed. It felt like everything Lillian had said must be true. Her best friend treated her like a Luthor after Lena spent years fighting the conditioning that she was unlovable, untrustworthy, something to be kept at arms length. Kara’s betrayal validated the years of mental and emotional abuse Lena endured at Lillian and Lex’s hands. 

Moving on to the scene where Supergirl, Lena, and Alex investigate Eve’s lab. Kara discovers that Lena has been making synthetic Harun-El. Lena admits to the project, but the evidence of the fear Lena carries that Supergirl will hate her for it is everywhere. She doesn’t make eye contact. Her eyes dart around the room, landing everywhere but Supergirl. She admits to the mistake, thinking that the truth would gain her more than lying would. She admits to it after steeling herself against Supergirl’s anger, reminding herself that she and Supergirl never got along. Supergirl immediately asks in Lena intended on giving Lex powers, and Lena explodes. “This is why I didn’t want to work with you,” she says, “Because every time I think things are getting better with us, you display an inherent distrust of my intentions.”. Kara tries to defend herself, but Lena points out: “You look past all the good we’ve done and see red whenever you feel vulnerable.” This is when Alex steps in, pointing out all the good Lena did with the Harun-El, saving both Argo and James with it. She even points out that she saved Sam, which is highly ironic considering in 5x08 Alex claims that Lena kidnapped Sam and kept her in the basement. This is enough to calm Kara down enough to actually hand Lena a real, sincere apology. 

“You’re right--” Kara says, and Lena is so surprised at the admission she actually says “Excuse me?” But Kara continues, louder. “You’re right. If you hadn’t made Harun-El, James wouldn’t be alive; you saved him in a way I couldn’t. I do see red sometimes, and it’s not an ego thing or allegiance or anything like that. I feel the weight of the world on my shoulders. And since Superman left and Lex has been free, it feels a lot heavier. If my enemies are strengthened, if I’m weakened in the slightest bit, I could lose. I just can’t...I can’t lose. I’m sorry, Lena.” Throughout this apology, we can see Lena is uncomfortable. She’s shifting around, not looking Supergirl in the eye, glancing at Alex. She’s trying to gauge if Kara is being honest or not. She’s just had a meeting with Lillian, who manipulates her at every turn. She isn’t sure what to believe. Lena is still struggling with the triggering event of facing her abuser, and this exchange has caused her to respond in a way that she would to Lillian or Lex’s attempts to manipulate her. This becomes more obvious after Kara’s finished, as she looks to Alex. When Alex doesn’t respond, only then does Lena accept the apology. This genuine apology surprises Lena so much she physically takes a step back and rocks on her heels. She’s nearly in tears again as she nods and whispers, “I appreciate that.”. 

Where is this Kara in season 5? This Kara, who explains why she did the thing that has hurt Lena (fear of failure), explains why she reacted the way she did (feels the weight of the world on her shoulders, and without Superman and Lex free, it’s heavier), and takes accountability for her actions (”I do see red sometimes, and it’s not an ego thing or allegiance or anything like that.”) Followed by a genuine “I’m sorry, Lena.”. This would go a long way with season 5 Lena. She needs reassurance that this wasn’t due to the fact that she’s a Luthor. Lena needs to hear that she isn’t what her family has spent decades telling her she is. She needs Kara to reaffirm that it was Kara’s mistake to not trust Lena, not Lena’s mistake to trust Kara. A simple “I’m sorry” would be better than Kara parroting back all of Lena’s past betrayals to her, digging in the fact that her best friend was just yet another addition to this list rather than being the one person who never hurt her. It wouldn’t fix things, but it would begin the long road to recovery and remaking their friendship. Are Lena’s actions excusable? No, she still broke the law and kidnapped Malefic. Are these actions explainable? Absolutely. Lena may never trust Kara in the same way ever again. Kara is a trauma survivor, able to relate to Lena in many ways. But the fear of becoming everything your abuser ever told you you were is a different type of trauma, and not one Lena will be able to shake in a few conversations. They need time, open and honest communication, and therapy. 

[wonderfulworldofmichaelford]

Psycho Analysis: Maxie & Archie

(WARNING! This analysis contains SPOILERS!)

Generation VI of Pokemon had many flaws, and Omega Ruby and Alpha Sapphire are arguably inferior to Emerald in many regards, but one thing is for sure: the remakes took two of the worst, most idiotic villains in the entire franchise and made them into interesting, likable characters. The original Maxie and Archie had the most needlessly nonsensical plans imaginable, resorting to ludicrous acts of eco-terrorism for ridiculously stupid goals; in the remakes, their reasoning is expanded upon and instead of merely being the poor man’s Team Rocket, Archie and Maxie and their respective teams became respectable and engaging antagonists.

Motivation/Goals: In the original games, well, let’s just say that these two had some of the stupidest plans imaginable. Archie wanted to flood the world with water so that people and Pokemon could live together, and Maxie wanted to expand the landmasses for a similar reason. The thing is, there plans make absolutely zero sense, particularly the part with the meteor and the volcano. It makes even less sense for Archie, but with Maxie it’s just dumb as all hell. How do you expect to expand the landmass by erupting a volcano in the middle of the continent, ding-dong?! But again, Archie isn’t much better, because he’s clearly not thinking through the ramifications of flooding the planet and expanding the seas. These two are morons no matter what way you slice it.

Thankfully, the remakes polish their motivations and refine them, while still keeping them as eco-terrorists so you don’t feel too bad about thwarting them. Archie wants to return the world to nature, acting as a force of vengeance against the people who have encroached on Pokemon habitats and polluted the sea; meanwhile, Maxie wants to expand the landmasses to further humanity’s progress at the expense of Pokemon, with him viewing peaceful coexistence as foolish and something that holds humanity back. These are pretty complex and interesting arguments that they put forth, but again, this is a children’s RPG series, so they’re eco-terrorists you gotta defeat before they destroy the world. At the very least, the remakes do show that as misguided as the two are, they’re still pretty noble and more well-intentioned than other villains in the franchise.

Personality: It’s not even worth going over the originals, because they’re pretty flat, bland characters who are just there to be the boss you fight to progress the story. There are some elements that got recycled into the remakes, such as their remorse over their terrorist actions as well as their genuine love for their Pokemon (as evidenced by the fact that both use Crobat), but that’s about it.

In the remakes, both are very distinct and fun characters. Archie is now a friendly foe, a buff and handsome pirate who is quite chummy with the player despite their opposition to him. It’s absolutely clear that he loves Pokemon, and apparently as children he and Shelly were even pals with Jirachi! He’s also pretty damn smart, seeing as he easily outmaneuvers Maxie at every turn in Alpha Sapphire. Maxie, while still courteous, is rather aloof and stoic, rarely showing emotion until he’s beaten in battle.While he doesn’t have quite as much going on as Archie, he still marks a nice contrast to the boisterous pirate by being a calm, collected scientist.

Final Fate: In the originals, both regret their actions upon seeing the destruction that Kyogre and Groudon unleash upon the Hoenn region, and return the orbs to Mt. Pyre to make amends. In the remakes it’s about the same, though they hand the orb to the player and will even join your side in battles in the Battle Maison after the Delta Episode comes to a close.

Best Scene: Obviously any battle with them, particularly the climactic battles in Emerald and the remakes. The original designs in general had pretty awesome showdowns during Gen VII’s Rainbow Rocket plotline as well.

Best Quote: These quotes, which handily sum up what they’re about:

"The land... It is the stage upon which humanity stands. The land exists so we humans might continue onward and upward, stepping into the future... For us to continue growing and evolving, humans require a grand stage upon which to stand. A land upon which we can stride forward... A land we can explore...develop...exploit... This is the basis for the growth of all human endeavor. That is why we, Team Magma, must increase the landmass of the world! Believe that this will lead to a future of eternal happiness for humanity... And consequently for all life!"

"The sea is an irreplaceable treasure for every living thing on this planet. But with our selfish extravagance, humanity dirties the great ocean, destroying this source of all life... Day by day, we're all destroying our most precious resource! If we humans suffer from our actions, well, maybe we'll end up getting what we deserve. But what about the Pokémon in our world? The Pokémon that no longer have a place to live because we stole and soiled their seas? The Pokémon that won't have a place to raise their young and watch them grow? We are creating a world in which innocent Pokémon suffer as a result of our actions... And that is something that I can't forgive! That's why I came to a decision, see? The foolish actions of my fellow humans, the seas we have blighted, nature itself... I will return everything to its unspoiled beginnings!"

I’m sure you can guess who said what.

Final Thoughts & Score: Archie and Maxie are relatively simple antagonists, but I think they played their roles well enough. As bad as their original versions were, they served as a nice step up from the more lowkey plots of Team Rocket and helped raise the stakes for the series, introducing teams that wanted to harness the powers of legendary Pokemon to destroy or reshape the world to their liking. And hey, even if the originals are pretty lame, at the very least in one alternate timeline their visions come true and they get to join up with Team Rainbow Rocket right before their deaths.

The versions from the remakes are easily the superior ones though, because not only do they fix the numerous idiotic flaws that the originals had in their plans, but they expand and add more flavor to the original characters while still maintaining the elements that worked about them in the first place. Archie is definitely the more impressive one; I find him to be a much more interesting and intriguing personality, especially because of his relationship with his cohorts and his mysterious childhood friendship with Jirachi. Remake Archie earns a nice 8/10 because of this.

Maxie, while a character I definitely find less fun than Archie, is still an incredibly solid antagonist and leagues better than his original iteration, so I think a 7/10 is warranted in his case. At any rate, both are better than the original white bread morons who antagonized the players of the Gen III games, who pretty handily earn a 4/10 each. They’re by no means the bottom of the barrel, but they’re idiotic schemes are so poorly planned that they make Captain Planet’s villains look like Mensa in comparison. Frankly their showing in the Rainbow Rocket plot is the only thing that keeps them from a 3, and even that’s a bit suspect because it isn’t the exact same Archie and Maxie of the Gen III games, just versions of those villains who succeeded.

Regardless, it’s hard to deny these two managed to get one of the most impressive glow-ups of the franchise after years of being overshadowed by the next generation’s villain.

[tlbodine]

A Decade of Horror Recommendations

With 2020 approaching, we’re reaching the end of a decade that has been uncommonly good to the horror genre, especially the last few years. Here’s an overview of some of the stand-out titles and my recommendations. Feel free to ask me about any of the titles on this list and I’ll happily share my more in-depth thoughts on them! 

Note that, of course, I have not seen every movie that’s come out in recent years, so I’ve probably missed some titles -- feel free to jump in with your own recommendations! 

Also this post is really long and has gifs, so I’m putting it under a cut. Sorry for the dash spam, mobile fam. Tell Tumblr to fix their shit. 

2010: Supernatural Horror Starts Making a Comeback 

Some stand-out films: 

Insidious: An important film for modern horror history, helping to usher in the new wave of paranormal/hauntings/demon films. It lays the tropes for a lot of the films that would get big in upcoming years. I thought it was pretty solidly decent. 

Devil: A clever script about being trapped on an elevator with the devil. It’s a bit too ambitious and doesn’t quite live up to those ambitions, but it’s solidly decent and refreshingly original. A hidden gem for the year. 

Black Swan: Maybe the height of Darren Aronofsky’s career as a household name. Not my favorite of his movies, but a pretty solid psychological suspense. 

Frozen: No, not that one. This is a clever movie that embraces a narrow scope: some teenagers get stuck on a ski lift and have to endure the elements and some hungry wolves below. Not a great movie, but worth watching as a study in what you can do with limited resources. 

Black Death: Quick shout-out for a dark and grisly historical horror involving witchcraft and torture. It’s not a fun movie to watch, but it’s got Sean Bean and Eddie Redmayne, and I feel like both original screenplays and historical horrors are rare enough to warrant support. 

2010 also had its share of predictable franchise tie-ins (a Saw movie, a Resident Evil movie, remakes like I Spit on Your Grave and The Crazies, etc.) The Horror Renaissance was a few years in coming. 

2011: The Year of the Predictable Remakes 

So many franchises getting flogged to death this year -- tripe like SCRE4M, Final Destination 5, Human Centipede 2, a Hellraiser reboot literally no one watched, and Paranormal Activity 3. Blech. BUT. 2011 also brought us a couple of my favorite movies ever: 

You’re Next: I would credit You’re Next with re-defining the “final girl” in horror. Also it’s a damn good home invasion movie with buckets of gore and a smart script. 

Cabin in the Woods: This one’s a bit divisive -- some folks really hated it I guess -- but it’s such a loving deconstruction of horror, and it’s wholly original even while being comfortingly familiar. Also it’s hilarious. 

2012: A Few Important Titles

I feel like 2012 was full of movies nobody has actually ever seen or talked about. But some of the good ones that I’d recommend: 

Sinister: Like Insidious in some ways, but maybe better.  Also, “Snakes don’t have feet.” Honestly just a very good, solid demon/haunted kid movie. 

V/H/S: A must-watch for horror buffs. It didn’t invent the found footage genre, but it did refine it and really show off what it could do best. 

Smiley: OK so like. This is not really a great film, but I think about it a lot and recommend it a lot. It’s stuck with me quite a bit somehow, and in some ways it feels very much ahead of its time as a creepy prediction of what internet culture would be like at the end of the decade. “We did it for the lulz.” Seriously, watch this movie today, and remember that it was made eight years ago, and see if it gives you chills too. 

I guess I should also mention Prometheus here, which lots of people liked. I was not one of them, but it was a heavily talked-about film I feel like and of course an Alien franchise tie-in. 

2013: The Year the World Remembered It Liked Horror 

This was a big turning point year, launching some new franchises instead of just re-treading old ones: 

The Conjuring: I personally hate all of these movies, but they are huge and you can’t swing a dead cat in the modern horror fandom without encountering one of them. The first Conjuring film was at least decent. For extra credit, watch it as a triple feature with Insidious and Sinister and do a compare/contrast. 

The Purge: Not only the start of a successful franchise but also a pop culture phenomenon and a damn good movie to boot. 

Mama: I love this movie. I have this movie on DVD. It’s kind of bittersweet and may not completely follow through on all of its promises, but it’s still quite good and has some lovely performances. 

Warm Bodies: Not really a horror -- kind of a romance -- but it warrants mention here because zombies were a hot item in 2013, and that’s a current special interest of mine on account of having a zombie book of my own coming out that is more than a little influenced by this story. (the film is a pretty good adaptation of the book, although honestly you could just skip the movie and read the book and get a better experience.)  

Willow Creek: I feel like I recommend this movie a lot, but that’s just because I think it’s very good and a very smart use of its own resources. A found footage mockumentary that actually manages to make Bigfoot frightening. Totally worth the watch. 

Mr. Jones: Here’s another hidden gem, also in found footage style (I feel like that was a prevailing theme in the years after V/H/S) but it’s surprisingly fresh. It’s a folk horror piece that doesn’t go at all where you might expect despite its thoroughly well-trodden ‘couple in secluded house’ setup. 

A bucketful of remakes and sequels this year too, including an Evil Dead reboot, V/H/S sequel, Insidious sequel, etc.  I should also probably mention World War Z, which was not actually very good and also had nothing in common with the book of the same name, but does mark an important moment in the mainstreaming of the zombie revival, especially considering it came out the same year as Warm Bodies. 

2014: Fuck Yeah People Actually Like This Shit Let’s Make More 

I feel like maybe our current horror renaissance started this year. Some recs: 

The Babadook: No surprises to anyone who follows my blog, but I love The Babadook and I will defend it to the bitter end against its detractors. It is one of my favorite horror films of all time and one of the best of the decade. 

It Follows: Ok confession, I actually did not like this movie at all. I thought it was ridiculous and over-hyped. But it makes the list because a lot of other people really, really loved it, and I accept that they saw something in it that I didn’t. Watch it and make up your own mind (and report back with your findings). 

As Above, So Below: This may be the most claustrophobic film ever made, and it deserves to be studied on that merit alone. It’s also pretty creepy and I suspect a lot creepier for folks who are unnerved by Christian horror/mythology (I am not, but I know lots of folks really are). 

Housebound: A hidden gem from New Zealand, this one is worth a watch because it takes a familiar haunted house premise and gives it a surprising and honestly delightful twist. 

Jessabelle: Not a great movie, but deserving of a spot here because it’s a Southern Gothic and features a main character in a wheelchair, which I think is neat. 

13 Sins: I feel like I’ve written about this movie for the blog before, and I recommend it a lot. But it’s clever and is a great early example of the “killing game” genre that has become increasingly prevalent (I mean, aside from the Battle Royale/Hunger Games version). 

It was neat to see so many original horror stories (as opposed to reboots/franchises) coming out, and that’s a trend that would continue (and is something that makes horror one of my preferred genres - there are more original stories in it than in many other types of film). 

2015: Hell Yeah Let’s Ride This Horror Train 

So many excellent movies this year! Ahh! 

Crimson Peak: Guillermo del Toro’s love letter to the Gothic. What I love about this movie (aside from Tom Hiddleston) is it plays all the tropes straight. It’s not trying to be a new spin or reinvent the genre or break all the tropes. It’s just a gothic horror story, told exactly like what it is, by a guy who makes damn good movies. I felt like that was really brave and surprising at the time. 

The Visit: M. Night Shyamalan had basically made a joke of himself after a string of awful movies, but this movie was enough to earn back a bit of respect in my book. It’s a clever premise and a smart use of found footage. 

The VVitch: Creepy-ass slow-burn supernatural historical horror, sign me up. I actually don’t like this movie as much as a lot of people (see above: religious-themed horror doesn’t push my fear buttons much) but it’s beautifully made, thoughtful, and artistic in a way that makes people sit up and pay attention to just how good the horror genre can be. 

Krampus: This movie is extremely silly and I love it. A holiday favorite I watch every year now. It’s hilarious, and imaginative, with some really creepy visuals and a thoroughly satisfying conclusion. 

The Invitation: For me, some of my favorite horror movies are the ones where the film is uncomfortable to watch before the actual horror stuff starts up. This one has an almost unbearably tense build-up and pays off in an incredibly satisfying and creepy manner. 

2016: Horror Goes Hella Mainstream

I feel like 2016 was another year of just...lots of kind of fun unique premises tossed out like spaghetti to see what would stick. And I am here for it. 

Don’t Breathe: Home invasion gone wrong is a great trope, and this one gets extra points for having the single most disturbing sequence utilizing a turkey baster I’ve ever seen in film. 

Hush: Speaking of home invasions. This one is pretty standard fare -- homeowner fights back! -- but the deaf main character is a neat twist. 

Lights Out: It’s pretty cheesy at times and the plot sort of falls in on itself, but the opening sequence is genuinely frightening and the movie almost literally killed @comicreliefmorlock so that’s a commendation I guess? 

Train to Busan: An Asian take on the zombie survival story. It’s a really good movie (if horribly bleak) and it does such an excellent job of making you genuinely care for all of the characters. 

The Autopsy of Jane Doe: A really neat premise with some wonderful slow-build horror. The storyline kind of goes off the rails, and it asks a lot of questions it doesn’t answer, but it’s quite good regardless. 

The Forest: I was disappointed with this one -- it just failed to live up to my expectations -- but it’s decent, and it’s a good attempt at capturing the creepiness of Japan’s Suicide Forest. 

Before I Wake: This one was sad more than scary, I thought, but it fits so neatly into a certain aesthetic that I am always a sucker for -- dreams and nightmares bleeding into reality, yes please. 

Split: Say what you will, I thought Split was amazing, and James McAvoy deserves a goddamn Oscar for his performance in this movie. 

The Monster: A hidden gem that’s worth watching to see how well it delivers on its premise: two characters stuck in a car with a monster outside. It’s not amazing, but it’s neat, and sometimes it’s nice to have just a straightforward creature feature with a bit of emotional heft for good measure. 

2017: Did Somebody Say Blockbuster? 

In hindsight, they’ll probably say 2017 was the start of the horror renaissance, but we’ll all know they’re a few years too late. Still, this was another great year: 

Get Out: Funny, dark, deeply uncomfortable and with some real meat to it -- Jordan Peele knows how to make a great movie. This absolutely deserves all the awards. 

It: Not a perfect movie, but a good adaptation of a difficult-to-adapt book. The kids are great. Pennywise is menacing, but that fucking flute lady is the scariest part. 

It Comes At Night: I didn’t like this one much, but a lot of folks did so it makes the list. See above re: It Follows. 

Gerald’s Game: Everything that’s wrong with this movie (ie, the ending) is wrong in the original story, so where this movie fails it’s a matter of sticking too close to its source material. But the premise is truly, genuinely horrifying, and the degloving scene almost made me vomit. So that’s cool. 

Happy Death Day: Another horror-comedy, with a healthy dose of self-awareness. It doesn’t take itself too seriously, and that’s what allows it to be fun. 

The Babysitter: This movie is hilarious. It’s also super bloody and clever and clearly made by people who love slashers, and the affection shows. 

The Ritual: So-so in the acting and pacing, but the creature design is A+ and the concept is really neat. Seriously just watch this one for the monster, it’s super cool looking. 

I should probably mention Mother here, but I can’t speak for it as I haven’t gotten around to watching it yet. It’s a very divisive film. One of these days I’ll watch it and let you know.

2018: There’s More Where That Came From 

If 2016 was the year of filmmakers just trying stuff for the hell of it, 2018 was the year of talented filmmakers and studios realizing that, oh shit, you can make really good horror movies with mass appeal. 

A Quiet Place: I’m glad I caught this one in theaters, because it really deserves to be watched in a dark, quiet room where no one dares to make a sound. The ending left a lot to be desired, but it was a clever premise. 

Hereditary: The best horror movie of the year imo. Painfully uncomfortable - I’m not sure I could watch it again - but highly recommended. 

Apostle: Watch this one in a triple-feature with The VVitch and Hereditary. A really good period piece with a character you actually want to root for. 

Bird Box: I didn’t like this movie much, but it was hugely popular. I bought the book recently and suspect it is much better. Still, it’s worth a mention for its impact on mainstream viewers (lots of people who don’t like horror really liked this movie). I won’t budge from my initial opinion that it’s just A Quiet Place meets The Happening, though. 

What Does 2019 Hold? 

We’re only halfway through the year, so we’ve got some time to see what is coming down the pipe. Lots of things to look forward to! But some solid titles so far this year that I’d heartily recommend: 

Us: Jordan Peele is at it again. It may not be as good as Get Out  -- there’s some plot holes where the internal logic of the world is at odds with the message it’s trying to send -- but it’s thoughtful and gives plenty to chew on. And there are places where it’s just unbearably tense and creepy. 

Brightburn: I had high hopes for this movie and was not disappointed. This is a super (ha, ha) good film. 

The Wind: A Gothic on the American frontier. It accomplishes what I think It Comes At Night was supposed to do, but more effectively (for me anyway). Bonus points for being written and directed by women. Double bonus: Caitlin Gerard, the main actress, is also the lead character in Smiley. 

I have not yet watched Velvet Buzzsaw, Ma or Midsommar this year, but I really want to. I’m also looking forward to the Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark film despite having some reservations about the whole concept. 

[qveenpoppy]

dora and the lost city of gold: a review

this was... not what i had hoped. i LOVED dora as a kid - i had dora pjs, a dora throw blanket, a TON of toys... i even found TWO dora necklaces in my childhood jewelry box and wore one as a bracelet to the theater (bc the chains were kid-sized, therefore too small for my adult neck). i SO wanted for this movie to be good, and it kinda... wasn't.

okay, the first, like, half hour/40 mins or so were excellent. the opening with kid dora and diego was one of my favorite parts. i had said beforehand whenever i saw it in the tv spots that i could have a whole movie of just that, them as kids with their imaginary adventures. an authentic live-action dora.

i didn't mind the jump in age and the high school thing either. the gag of dora learning what high school and socializing with kids her age is like was great, and it even hit hard when diego wanted nothing to do with her. again, would have taken a whole movie of that too.

it's when we got to the jungle stuff that i started... questioning things. monkeys can't talk but mercenaries were working with a talking anthropomorphic fox who wears a mask? yeah, that was a bit far-fetched. though, side note: i LOVED swiper, from his lines to his design - all of it. he was just such a side character in the movie. i expected him to be the main villain but considering dora didn't really know him going into this movie... i guess they're setting up for a sequel where he is the big bad? (but do i actually want more of this? i don't know.)

obviously i won't go and give a full plot summary now, i'll just go into the good and the bad. the other students, sammy and randy, were okay. i understand the need for this to not be entirely focused on dora and diego, but when they kinda teased them & alejandro continuing the trek on their own, i almost got excited. but nope, other students came back. woo. and having them be love interests for dora and diego was annoyingly forced. i mean, the randy/dora thing was more one-sided than anything but sammy/diego was dumb and forced and i wasn't here for it. at least bc when sammy met dora, i was like, "let's go lesbians!" they seemed cute together. they fit that "i gave my crush a note that said 'get out of my school'" meme thing.

though, dora and diego's arc kinda reminded me a little alex & justin's in the wizards of waverly place movie??? both had campfire bonding scenes. and if you think i'm implying incest here with that comparison (listen if you didn't lowkey ship jalex with that movie, you're just dumb) then yes, i am. not like i want it in canon, but hey, it's fiction. real world rules and morals and shit don't apply, especially considering all the unrealistic shit that happened in this movie. their relationship had more depth and heart than sammy & diego's forced little... whatever it was. when i got bored halfway through the film, i honestly just felt anxious to start writing fix-it fics for them. and i absolutely plan to. judge me all you want, i don't care. i'm not actually harming anyone.

(which does remind me of one little issue i had - dora's parents didn't seem to recognize diego??? obviously he did get older so yeah, he's not the little boy they looked after, but he even called them "tios" - or "tio y tia", i forget, but "tios" is probably the correct plural for aunt & uncle, considering "padres" = parents - and then there was some joke about dora's dad not really caring what happened to the other THREE kids when they were captured. i was so confused and mad about it that i even whispered to my mom, "he doesn't recognize his own nephew?!" she might not have heard me but OH BOY, did i have a problem with that part.)

the last act was where the movie kinda jumped the shark for me but whatever, i guess it's a fantasy now. woo. oh, i forgot to say before - eugenio durbez was fun! i love him as an actor. the villain twist was pretty predictable (his "i'm a friend of your parents" just screamed STRANGER DANGER), but the funnier scenes with him were good. i wish he was an ally the entire time, and swiper was the big bad. but whatever. like i said, sequel!

also i don't know who the heck this movie is for. the opening & that 2d animated sequence (i loved it so much!!! also served as a good example of what i wanted out of a whole film. REBOOT THE SHOW, NICK! with that newer animation style!) were definitely meant for those of us who grew up with the show, but a lot of the humor was really juvenile. too many poop jokes. they showed the quicksand fart sound gag in a trailer and i thought it was cute, but that Other Scene? it was too long, not funny, and i was kinda concerned for sammy, considering she was interrupted. but then the action makes the movie seem like it's for older kids, so... i was really confused.

i guess like the first descendants, this was kind of a mess and all over the place. but descendants fixed itself (mostly) with its sequels, so maybe dora could do the same, if it makes enough to warrant a sequel or two. (considering it only had like a $49 million budget, i think it should make enough for a sequel? but we'll see.)

as for live-action remakes of beloved cartoon series, i'll stick to kim possible. (where is THAT sequel, disney?!)

7/10.

[doomonfilm]

Ranking : Top Films of 2018

Here we are... that moment that every critic simultaneously loves and dreads : the Year-End Top 10 List.  At worst, we are forced to scrape the creative dredges and cobble together something that resembles a best of list that will bring glory and honor to the year.  At best (like this year), we are forced to leave personal favorites in the dust and judge the larger quantity of offerings on a much tougher scale in order to truly represent the top quality work of the year.

As I’ve said in many pieces this year, 2018 was a joy in terms of being a film-lover.  This list was not an easy undertaking, and it more so resembles a snapshot of how I’ve felt over a judging period than it does a concrete group of selections in a fixed order.  Take this list as more of a jumping off point for discovery than you do the gospel of DOOMonFILM. 

Note : I am not sure when I will get a chance to see Vice or The Favourite, which I am sure will skew my results once I do see them... I will address those films in their respective reviews, however.  Forgive me in advance.

Honorable Mentions

Damsel Even if the Zellner Brothers weren’t representing Austin beautifully with this gem of a film, it’d still be on my radar simply for the fact that it is a unique twist on a genre that most figured had seen every presentation imaginable.  Add to that a strong female lead character, and you’ve got a winner on your hands.

The Endless A science-fiction modern day classic, and apparently part of a possibly bigger line of stories (with some of the best integration of aspects from another film I’ve ever seen).  This film is chilling in its approach to the concept of cults, as well as its use of the concept of ‘the danger that lurks just off-screen’.

Isle of Dogs Had this year not been full of stellar animated films, this one probably would have made the main list.  More groundbreaking animated films, combined with personal feelings about the films of Wes Anderson, however, regulated this one to Honorable Mention status.

Mid90s I was all set for Eighth Grade to be my bit of nostalgia, or my reflection on what it’s like to be a kid again, and for what it’s worth, it was a great film.  The thing is, Mid90s directly spoke to me in a way that Eighth Grade unfortunately could not, simply because Mid90s was like looking in a time-traveling mirror. 

Thoroughbreds I really wanted this to be on my top 10, but ultimately, it was too ‘quiet’ of a film to make it in a year full of big noise.  Thoroughbreds will certainly be a future favorite for public screenings and friend viewings, but a couple of films this year hit the same notes on a higher frequency.

Black Panther The cultural impact of this film is one that cannot be ignored.  It took February, a month that is generally a box office bust, and it put up unparalleled numbers that not only lasted throughout the year, but were topped from within rather than by another Hollywood studio.  The respect given to the characters and their African heritage did not go unnoticed, either, as several think-pieces and a number of curriculum were spawned from those researching elements of the production design.  The narrative is strong, and it righted the Marvel villain boat prior to the big MCU bombshell that was lying in wait. 

The Favourite I really wanted this to make the top 10 of the year... I thought long and hard about what film I should remove or replace.  What I came to realize, however, is that despite The Favourite being a world-class comedy and production, it simply falls short in the realm of the spectacular : it does not contain visual innovations, it is not a reflection of the times, and it didn’t completely break my brain.  That being said, on any given day, I’d happily name this one of the top 10 films of 2018... it’s essentially like having 11 cakes on the table and having to pick the 10 best.

Avengers : Infinity War This movie was the true film event of the year.  Marvel has been building up to this singular event for nearly two decades, and in my opinion, the payoff more than succeeded.  Thanos tiptoed the line between anti-hero and villain with purpose perfectly, and the rapport between characters worked both in terms of advancing narratives and being mined for humor.  I am definitely looking forward to Avengers : Endgame this April, and I know the masses are right there with me.

10. BlacKkKlansman

Not that I ever doubted Spike Lee had it, but after a few abstract offerings and documentaries, one wonders if their style can translate into an ever-expanding world of film language.  Luckily for Lee, it seems the world has grown into his cinematic vision, with an older true story serving as the perfect backbone for many of Lee’s trademark tricks to be implemented for maximum effect.  The ending will put you in tears if you have anything closely resembling a soul.

9. Blindspotting

This film really deserved a bigger run than it got, as it hit race relations of today on the nose without coming off as preachy or heavy-handed.  Daveed Diggs proved that his charisma translated on both stage and screen, and his integration of hip-hop into both realms will hopefully have positive long-lasting effects.  The chemistry between all members of this cast is kinetic, the story is told with perfect pacing, and the movie rides visual highs that match the narrative ones.  I would love to see this movie receive some high-degree nominations.

8. Annihilation

I came into 2018 with high expectations for this film, as I’d spent the previous 16 months or so completing the Southern Reach trilogy in its book form.  Then I started hearing things about the production and the release that gave me a bad feeling : a Netflix distribution deal that seemed to all but kill a true theatrical run, trepidation from the studio in regards to the director’s vision, and other whispers that attempt to sink a film.  Then I saw this movie, and was taken away to a completely different world.  We may not be getting a faithful, trilogy-length adaptation of the series anymore based on what happens in Annihilation, but if these are the moments I’m left with, I’d consider myself happy in the long run. 

7. First Reformed

It took me longer than I intended to get around to this one, but knowing that Paul Schrader wrote and directed it made it a must-see.  The film was drawing comparisons to Taxi Driver (not a surprise, based on the aforementioned Schrader involvement), and surprisingly, it more than lived up to that hype.  The tension is equal, but updated to reflect the times in a way that could impact any of us.

6. Suspiria   

This movie will make it extremely hard for me to blanket-debate against remakes simply because it does all of the right things in regards to updating a classic.  The film does not rely on existence as a new millenium version of an old film... rather, it boldly takes concepts only touched upon in the original and fully embraces them, presenting a true psychological horror gem in a year full of them.  The film also looks amazing on top of everything, which was a high bar to meet considering the original movie is basically driven by its visual style.  A 2018 must-see, film buff or not.

5. Spiderman : Into the Spider-Verse

Easily the most fun I’ve had in a theater all year.  I was blown away by the animation, and can’t wait to see further installments of the Spider-verse specifically to see how that enhances over the years.  There was such a high volume of homage and Easter Egg placement in this film that it warrants repeat viewings, and it was one of a handful of films that I wanted to instantly own as I was walking out of the theater.

4. Mandy

Like Spider-Man : Into the Spider-verse, I wanted to own this movie the second I walked out of the theater as well.  The trailers intrigued me, a recommendation of Beyond the Black Rainbow fully sold me, and the final product did not disappoint.  This film certainly is not for everyone, and funny enough, the two biggest aspects that would place it on that ‘not for everyone’ list sit in opposition of one another : the film is a bit indulgent on the style at the sake of what would be considered normal pacing, and it has some extremely violent moments.  That being said, Mandy is easily one of, if not THE, most beautiful films of the year.

3. Roma

This seems like the closest thing to a Fellini film that us modern day film lovers will ever get.  The story itself is intriguing, as it juxtaposes class issues, political issues and the barrier of trying to raise a family in a crazy world all in an intriguing tapestry.  The cinematography is calculated, observational, and the choice to film the movie in black and white adds an instant timeless quality to it.  Director Alfonso Cuaron even manages to get in a little cinematic and visual humor, albeit mostly subtly, but it definitely pays off if you’re in tune to what he’s doing.  Easily one of the best pictures of the year, worldwide, and a party that I was certainly late to.

2. You Were Never Really Here

If Mandy is a bit too over the top for your tastes, then You Were Never Really Here may be the jarring experience you need in 2018.  This film is almost as visually stunning, but the narrative is far more calculating, deceptive and intriguing, both on the surface and as you dig deeper.  The hectic camera setups, editing and score put you in such a disjointed state of mind that Joaquin Phoenix becomes the only thing you can hang on to, and your involvement in his journey is completely immersive.  In a year of performances that focus on the anti-hero, this film found a way to scrape to the top of the pile.

1. Hereditary

Something strange is happening here... who would have thought that a horror film would be my favorite film of the year?  Hereditary is no run of the mill horror film, however... it treats its audience as intelligent, and there is so much texture in the film that it’s impossible to see it all without multiple viewings.  The close of the first third of the film is horribly unsettling, but it propels the narrative forward so abruptly and intensely that you’re locked in from there out.  A genius film, and an instant classic.

(Editor’s notes)

- Original post date : 12/27/18 - Revision date : 1/8/19 (Roma added to position 3, Black Panther moved to Honorable Mentions) - Revision date : 1/10/19 (The Favourite added to Honorable Mentions) - Revision date : 1/22/19 (Suspiria added to position 6,Avengers : Infinity War moved to Honorable Mentions)

[sol1056]

a bunch more asks waiting their turns so politely

These are all various asks about the likelihood of a remake, a rewritten season, or a spinoff. 

1 could we get an alternate version 2 is a rewrite for S8 a viable option 3 would they change the ending for a spin-off 4 are single-episode edits possible for S8 5 will S7 reactions affect S8 6 how will DW get us to watch S8

Behind the cut.

With the shitstorm that vld became, would dreamworks ever take pity on us and remake some seasons of voltron that turned out like crap, or not even air, just release them as alternate versions on dvd? Im questioning the possibilities, not the probabilities, bc Im really not optimistic about that, I just wanna know if a show can do that and what would it take for the company to snap their fingers and be like "lets do it" (besides having money)

It’s not like frequent reboots don’t have precedent in other franchises; hell, comics do it on the regular. It’s also much cheaper to do a series of graphic novels or full novelizations geared towards an older audience. The problem there is that Dreamworks isn’t a comic book company or a publishing house; that part of the franchise would have to be farmed out to someone else. 

My guess --- if another remake is ever a possible option --- it’d be several years down the road. The first version would be set aside as, say, the Y-7 version for kids and family, and then you’d find a new angle for the next version. 

If DW got the impression there was a massive older crowd (say, 25-45) who would’ve eaten up a more mature, somewhat darker, version? Sure, why not try to grab that audience? I mean, look at the Castlevania series: it’s not pulling any punches on making clear it’s for adults. That would also require a different business model, since what adults like to buy for themselves is very different than what kids want. Skip the cake toppers, for starters. 

do you think given the reaction to VLD S7, is a rewrite for S8 a viable option? I feel the fandom is divided about the general reaction to S7. If JDS and M can just [focus on the fanbase segment] that liked it, why [bother trying to fix it for those] that didn't?

Given what I’ve been seeing in terms of data from the season... I think they aimed to please everyone and ended up pleasing no one. 

Pretty sure I’ve said something to this extent before: when you can’t please everyone, the answer isn’t to split the difference and piss everyone off. The answer is to pick your audience and give them the best damn story you can. The rest will sort itself out.

Let me put it this way: there are enough people who didn’t like S7 for the crummy animation, the OOC dialogue and actions, and the nonsensical storyline overloaded with a host of new characters that stole time from the actual protagonists. And there are also enough people who didn’t like S7 for queerbaiting the audience, killing off three out of four queer characters, and sidelining the one remaining queer character. There may be some overlap between those two sets, but taken together, those two sets are pretty much the dominant majority of the fan base. 

I don’t know if that makes a rewrite a viable option, but it should be making a few execs think twice about letting the EPs/staff carry on in the same direction. I mean, you want a series to end on a high note, not an ‘omg that had such potential but boy did it self-destruct in the last two seasons’ note.  

So if DW wants to do a Voltron spin-off, would they consider changing the ending to VLD to give Shiro the things he earned so this spin-off wouldn't be dead out of the water?

That would depend entirely on whether they’ve gotten the message that Shiro’s current status isn’t good enough for a significant part of the fanbase. If all they’re hearing (or all they choose to hear) is that it’s great to sideline one of their protagonists with no in-story explanation whatsoever, what’s to tell them there’s anything that needs addressing?  

Additionally, if the entirety of the issue is Shiro --- and everyone else is just fine, thanks --- I’m not sure that’d rate as enough to warrant changing so much. More likely any spin-off would start some X length of time between, and we’d get an implied intermediary backstory (or even a mild retcon), and go from there. 

Truth is, whomever gets the spin-off will (I really hope) be a better writer and not have to deal with intrusive newbie EPs. Even then, they’d be kinda limited on what they could do, given the spin-off does need to make sense placed against the first series. Then again, VLD hasn’t respected its own premise or continuity for the past few seasons, anyway. 

So I guess there’s always the option to start with an episode that retells VLD’s ending... Kinda awkward, but not unheard of, to basically retcon a previous series out of existence.  

I have no doubt DW is looking into what went wrong with this season. I know it might be a little to late to fix all of Season 8, but do you think they would have at least maybe the last few episodes changed to give a better ending to the show - or at least more respect to Shiro as a character?

Normally I’d say no. I mean, episode 1 should have characters making choices that in turn impact episode 2, and those choices prompt the events in episode 3... but that’s a logic VLD threw out the window somewhere between S3 and S4, and it’s only gotten worse since then. 

In which case, oh sure, why not? It wouldn’t make any less sense than what they’ve already got planned, if S7 is any indication. 

Could the reaction to season 7 cause any change the execs minds going into season 8? 

One problem: this is a Dreamworks production, but it’s not a DW-owned story. It’s a franchise: there are other players involved. There are the two guys who first butchered GoLion into Voltron, Toei whose story got that embutcherment, Netflix as the distributor, along with Playmates and Lion Forge and other contracted partners. There’s a lot more people at the table than just DW. 

It’s one thing for the EPs to say they messed up, and apologize. It’s quite another for Dreamworks to admit publicly their lousy (or nonexistent) oversight allowed the situation to happen. 

Legal would have apoplexy, for starters. What wins you a franchise is often showing you have the confidence (if not sheer chutzpah) that you can do this job justice like no other. And then you hit S7 and must admit you hired people who made a complete hash of it? 

If there’s anything that will cost the EPs any future roles of a similar position, it’s that they’ve put DW in a very uncomfortable position. Caught between a furious fanbase and overly-interested co-owners, someone --- or several someones --- are treading very lightly right now. They’re not going to forget the EPs are the ones who precipitated the whole mess. 

I think we are in a unique situation where the fact that the EPs were vocal about [changing] VLD ... could be a blessing for us & DW. [But we know it] was changed, & DW's part seems to be more negligence than direct fault like the EPs. So DW can drop it or fix it, and a rewrite would be worth us sticking around, while restoring DW's name.

Again, that depends on whether DW is in a position that they can do so. I assure you they’d throw the EPs under the bus at the first opportunity, because that’s how the corporate world works. So their failure to do so is either because they don’t see the EPs’ actions as untenable (as far as we know), or because doing so would expose DW corporate to greater retaliation from elsewhere. (It could also be part of the agreement that these particular EPs are in place for the duration of the series’ production, too. Sometimes that happens.) 

I still can’t get over the fact that the EPs were so blunt about having already had a script fully written when they asked to revise. From the Studio Mir leaks, we can guess at least some of the animation was already in production at least a year ago, or earlier. That’s a lot to redo. 

Here’s something that only just occurred to me, when I listed the co-partners in this franchise: the Koplar brothers. These are the geniuses who figured they didn’t need to know Japanese to make GoLion into an american production; turns out they were geniuses on some level ‘cause it was a hit, anyway. They went on to produce Voltron: Fleet of Doom (1986), Voltron: the Third Dimension (1998), and Voltron Force (2011). If there is anyone at the table who’d be likely to have nostalgia goggles, it’d be the Koplars. This has been their ongoing story in one way or another for over 30 years. 

Originally, the EPs said they weren’t tied to nostalgia; they weren’t going to redo the story as it was, but the story as they remembered. (I’d argue this actually indicates a stronger set of nostalgia goggles, but eh.) Their determination to get rid of Shiro has always felt like nostalgia goggles to me. Perhaps the Koplars were the greatest supporters of Keith as BP --- since that would respect the pattern they’ve followed, over and over, in all the iterations. 

Considering the Koplar’s somewhat litigious background over Voltron ownership, they may’ve had the ability to overrule. So... if you want to bench Shiro, you pitch your work with the execs who are most likely to agree with you. And if you can do that in the window between the previous VP of TV retiring and a brand-new external hire coming on as VP... welp, you got permission, and the new VP may’ve signed off, not realizing the impact. 

Which would put DW over a barrel, in some ways. If DW could’ve overruled their partners, the EPs never would’ve been able to make that end-run in the first place. 

How do u think DW will try to get us to watch s8? They & the EPs have shattered our trust and the show is so messy its almost unsalvageable. 

Stay to see X point's resolution? Yeah, we stayed many seasons for nothing, next. 

We have more rep? Ex. blonde girl is autistic... So we should be scared for her too??? 

There's more queer rep? Yeah, we heard that one already. 

Unless everyone responsible is fired and a new crew runs the next seasons?

I don’t know. I would hope the answer is ‘by giving us a story that makes sense, and creates closure for all the protagonists, and not just by making two of them emotional rewards for two other characters.’ 

At this point, there is only one thing that’s going to make Dreamworks change course: if the fallout from VLD impacts its other projects. If the majority of the VLD fanbase up and announced it would be boycotting She-Ra or Fast & Furious or Trollhunters on the grounds that DW screwed up so badly with VLD that it cannot be trusted... Then you’d see movement. If the PR got so bad from so many upset and angry VLD fans that major news outlets paid attention and started writing articles about the situation, that would also put a black mark beside Dreamworks’ name -- and then you’d see movement. 

With the VLD toys a failure (for whatever mismanaged reasons) and a financial model set entirely on toys, fixing VLD now would be throwing good money after bad. Unless, of course, there’s an impact beyond just this single series. 

Until Dreamworks can see the impact in some concrete sense, they have far more to lose from their partners than they have to gain from their fanbase. It’s just how it is, with corporations in late capitalism. 

You want to make an impact? You tell Dreamworks ahead of time, and then you follow through: pick a week and go silent. Nothing about VLD, here or on twitter or anywhere else. No reblogs on She-Ra updates. Ignore the podcasts. Don’t click on the articles. That stuff’ll be there when the week is over, after all. Show DW what it’s like when a fanbase checks out, by doing it. It’s a short-term boycott, but the reason groups do boycotts is because they work. 

[poormansspoiler]

  Frido has always been a Resident Evil fan, so how does Resident Evil 2 stack up?

Let me start by saying I love the Resident Evil series.  I love the story, the gameplay, the characters–all of it.  I was very skeptical that Resident Evil 2 was going to change too much of what I love about the original.  This game, however, is fantastic.  Of course there are changes–it’s 2019, why would developers not add modern conveniences?  Resident Evil 2 does stay very true to the original. Some people have made side-by-side comparisons of full scenes, and it’s amazing.  As always, spoilers ahead. (The original game has been out for 20 years, though, AND there’s a movie, so what are you doing?)

Resident Evil 2 takes place after the initial outbreak in Raccoon City.  News hasn’t spread to neighboring towns and the outbreak is still fresh.  You can either play as Leon Scott Kennedy, a rookie police cop whose first day on the force turned into a nightmare or Claire Redfield, the badass woman who is searching for her big brother, Chris Redfield (who made an appearance in the first game).  The two meet at a gas station outside of town and have their first encounter with the zombies.  As they enter town, the two are forced out of their car, and Leon heads into the police station while Claire tries to find her way to the police station.  As players go through, they encounter lots of puzzles and enemies.  From lickers to the Tyrant, Mr. X, there’s no lack of fear.  There’s a lot to cover, so let’s get started.

The Excellent

There’s a lot more good than bad within this review.  Starting out, the game feels fresh–not like a remake normally does.  The game is gorgeous, which puts all of those gorey moments into full view.  Resident Evil 2 replaces the original fixed camera angle and places in an over-the-shoulder camera angle instead.  The original game was pretty scary for its time, but the new graphics and the new camera angle add a lot to that original scare factor.

Another thing that adds a lot to this remake is the introduction of a real-time binaural audio system (the sound is recorded with two different microphones to create a 3D effect for the audio).  It gives the sensation of listening to surround sound when the sound is just coming through your TV.  The new sound system creates a creepier sensation when walking through the environment. The best example of how the sound changes the game is when players are running from Mr. X.  He constantly chases you throughout the police station, and if you listen you can hear where his giant footsteps are coming from.  It adds another to dimension to the gameplay with something so small as sound.  Speaking of sound, one nice note that was included with the deluxe edition of the game was the ability to switch between the old soundtrack of the original game and the new one.  It’s a nice add-on for fans of the original game.

There are other little things that were added to the new version of Resident Evil 2 that vastly improve it from the original game.  There are no longer ink ribbons! This was added to later versions in the Resident Evil franchise but was originally in Resident Evil 2.  Not having to carry around ink ribbons helps with item management and makes the game feels less urgent.  Checkpoints were also added, so when players die, they no longer have to redo hours of work if they didn’t save.  And a big one, loading doors are now removed.  Loading doors were just a little bit of animation in the original Resident Evil games to give the game time to load.  These are no longer necessary, and other than the initial load times for the game starting up, there are no loading screens.  The game has better controls as well.  The controls are no longer what are known as “tank controls” like the original.  It feels much more fluid and up-to-date.   And our lovely Ada Wong has her lovely red dress that the fans love.  Let’s be honest though, if they hadn’t put the dress in Resident Evil 2, there would have been an uprising.

Mr. X adds a fear factor that is like no other.  The thought of constantly being chased is straight up terrifying.  Players could be going to get that least piece to solve a puzzle and you hear his footsteps coming down the hallway.  It’s a great mechanic to always keep players on edge.  At the beginning of the game, zombies cannot come into the main hall which is a safe area.  Mr. X doesn’t care about the rules, though, and will show up while you are within this safe area.  I found this out the hard way as I escaped into the main hall and though to myself, “Ha ha!  Come get me now!”  as he then proceeded to follow and I proceeded to scream and run.

With the Mr. X challenge players also have the obstacle of the Lickers.  As a returning fan favorite, the lickers look as gross as ever with the updated graphics.  Nothing like seeing something that is literally inside out coming at players, tongue first, as its brain weebles and wobbles where it has no skull.  The lickers rely on sound, as they are blind. Players can normally sneak around lickers by not making any noise.  If Mr. X is nearby though, players must run or he takes a massive amount of damage with every strike, and this also alerts the lickers.

The Not-So-Great

  One of the biggest issues was the Leon and Claire’s playthrough are very similar.  When the two get separated at the beginning of the game, you think that there will be a massive difference in the areas for the playthrough.  There are not.  Leon and Claire both go through the police station solving the same puzzles.  The main difference between the two are that Leon is introduced to Ada Wong, while Claire is introduced to Sherry Birkin.  Yes, there is a difference, but not big enough however that it warranted two playthroughs.  The game could have been presented where you switch between Claire and Leon once you hit a certain scene, which it already does in some scenes with Sherry and Ada.  It feels as though they were just trying to add more gameplay hours. Instead of making it one continuous story, it was presented as two almost exactly the same stories.

There were some other things that brought down the game. The item system is hard to learn and things were missing from the original story.  Though these are issues that I had with the game, not all players had them.  The item system becomes easier to learn, and if you didn’t know that these things were missing from the story, it doesn’t really change it that much.

Final Verdict

The game is really good, and I hope that other remakes that come out can have the same effort put in.  The scare factor is great, and it’s really bringing the Resident Evil series (literally) back to it roots.  Resident Evil 7 was a great start to that, but this game just feels more intense.  I highly recommend this if you like puzzle games or survival horror.  It is a little easier now with the puzzles since the internet is more common, though.  I really hope a lot of people support Resident Evil 2. It’s a great game with a lot of scares, but is definitely not without its challenges.  I highly recommend.

Written by Frido (Frido is an avid gamer and plays games when they should be doing homework. Their other hobbies include sleeping, eating, drinking, and acting like they’re going to start exercising when we all know they’re not. Some of their favorite games include The Bioshock Series, the Resident Evil series, and Luigi’s Mansion. They figured if they’re gonna have all of these opinions might as well put them to paper.)

Is the new Resident Evil 2 as good as previous games in the franchise? Frido dives into the game in their latest review. Frido has always been a Resident Evil fan, so how does Resident Evil 2 stack up?

[spoookiepie]

The problem is, the novelty of the live action remake is to see fantastical things, previously only seen in animation, to life. (I still don’t think that’s enough basis to warrant so many remakes but I at least understand it)

It’s to see what a beast and enchanted castle look like as real things, or witches with magical powers, or humans who can talk with animals.

Lion King tho? It’s... just animals. Doing fairly realistic animal movements (and you can bet your butt, the second they don’t, it’s gonna take a nosedive into the uncanny) So like, the novelty of ‘I wanna see that irl!’ wears off the second you realize it’s either a. boring and in no way an improvement to the original, or b. a weird dip into the uncanny valley and something you wish your eyes didn’t have to see anymore.

(And as this post implies, it’s an exercise in redundancy. It’s still technically an animated film lol, they just have rly good looking cg models)

On top of that, a problem more and more of these remakes are having, but is esp glaring with Lion King is;

What’s the Point?

What is Disney bringing to the table that’s gonna make this remake stand out from the original? The novelty of real life animals is already kinda out.

Maleficent (flawed as it is) benefited from being a new take of the character but like... don’t DO that to Lion King?? Don’t you dare touch its story???? That story is good I don’t want an edgy ‘but what if-?’ retelling, or a dumb amount dedicated to trying to fix plot holes no one really cared about to begin with

Jungle book had the benefit of showing a live person interacting with real (or at least stunningly lifelike cg) animals. But, it was also bringing back a much older Disney film and making it relevant again.

But LK is less that 30 years old, and it’s possibly one of the most well known of the animated films. Disney still makes BANK on it. (They fuckingb made it one of the themed areas in their newest resort, and shows for the broadway version still make the rounds every couple years.) Its still super relevant to all of us, and this remake is gonna be held to high scrutiny in comparison. (I think Disney is also possibly biting itself in the ass by planning all these remakes of the 90’s films, since.. you know, those were the childhood bread and butter for all of the 90’s babies)

Much like their live action Beauty and the Beast, I don’t want them to change the story since it’s so good buuuuuut... not changing the story also makes it... kinda redundant and pointless. Beauty and the Beast, again, at least had the advantage of showing what a beast and talking furniture would look like irl. (Just with they weren’t nightmarish cgi monsters half the time. Disney missed an opportunity to do some cool puppets is all I’m saying)

And like... it looks like the movie will have a stellar cast, I can give it that. And maybe good music? are they gonna keep the songs in? I certainly don’t NOT want them (LK soundtrack is a 10/10) but also.... those live action lions singing and dancing is... also not incredibly appealing...

So ye

What’s the point?

What is even the POINT of a live action Lion King?

Disney: We’re gonna make a live action remake of the Lion King!

Me: How you gonna incorporate live animals?

Disney: We’ll animate them!

Me:

[johnmauldin]

10 Potential Black Swans and Opportunities for the US Economy in 2017

We’ve reached that wonderful time of year when financial pundits pull out their forecaster hats and take a crack at the future. This time the exercise is particularly interesting because we’re at several turning points. Any one of them could remake the entire year overnight.

I should probably say up front that I am actually somewhat optimistic about 2017—optimistic, meaning I think we will Muddle Through—but that’s a lot better outcome than I was expecting five months ago. However, midcourse corrections may be warranted.

Instead of trying to answer questions about the future, I’ll try to list those we should be asking as 2017 opens.

We can’t afford for any of the major components of the global economy to break down; so, it’s smart to ask, “Where are the weak points?” That’s what we’ll do today. We’ll poke at the economic mechanism as it grinds along.

Trumping DC

The biggest change will happen in Washington DC when Donald Trump takes office. Aside from the changes he can make on his own authority, he’ll be in position to approve the many Republican initiatives that President Obama blocked. Here are some items I’m watching.

Tax reform: Our monstrosity of a tax system needs major reconstruction: a reduction and simplification of corporate taxes, a significant reduction of the individual income tax, and replacement of the Social Security tax with a VAT-like consumption tax. What will come out of the House is still unknown.

My sources are telling me House members want to pass an initial tax cut quickly and defer the more complicated changes for later in the year. The easy initial tax cut is to remove the Obamacare tax when they repeal Obamacare (the Affordable Care Act), which it appears they will do early in the session.

Final thoughts on taxes: Some industries will suffer massive impacts if you slap tariffs on incoming goods. Further, putting a high tariff on products that are sold at Walmart and Costco and on Amazon is massively inflationary to those shoppers (and that’s most of us).

These policies can be tricky, and the consequences can have a big impact on consumer confidence.

Energy: The Obama administration’s heavy-handed environmental regulations are a major impediment to US energy independence. Trump can change many of them quickly because they came in the form of executive orders and rulemaking that doesn’t require congressional approval.

Trump can also approve some of the Arctic and offshore drilling projects that Obama would not consider. I am told that there are some $50 billion worth of oil-production projects that are ready to go, which would be a massive source of high-paying jobs.

If he wants to play hardball with OPEC, Trump could even impose a tariff on imported petroleum products that we can produce here (as opposed to the raw crude, especially heavy crudes, that we currently don’t produce). That would give domestic producers and refiners a further boost. It would also aggravate the rest of the world’s oil glut.

Economic stimulus: We have plenty of shovel-ready projects, or could create them in short order, that would create jobs and simplify trade and travel. Some will not be very profitable in the short run, so they may not happen under a tax-credit scheme.

Trade: Import-dependent businesses are on pins and needles right now, hoping the Trump administration doesn’t turn toward the kind of protectionism some of the new appointees have advocated in the past. We’ll see. The president has considerable latitude in this area, so almost anything is possible.

Banking: One reason the stock market has gone bananas since the election is the prospect of banking deregulation. Wall Street has been chafing under the Dodd-Frank Act’s requirements and restrictions. The Volcker Rule on proprietary trading has clearly worsened bond market liquidity and taken a major revenue center away from the banks.

The Dodd-Frank Act as presently constructed could actually aggravate matters if we find ourselves in another financial crisis. Dodd-Frank prevents the Federal Reserve from stepping in with liquidity and instead says that the FDIC should “resolve” any failing banks.

I see the point, but the main reason we have a central bank is to be a lender of last resort to the banking system. The FDIC simply can’t act fast enough, nor does it have the ability or the cash to act effectively in a crisis. Congress needs to fix this soon.

Finally, Dodd-Frank puts our regional and small community banks at a massive disadvantage. They get all of the costs and are restricted from their normal activities. Overhauling Dodd-Frank will be a big boon to entrepreneurs and small businesses and will create jobs.

Federal Reserve: We should also see at least two nominees to the Fed’s Board of Governors soon after Trump takes office. He may get a third one if Daniel Tarullo leaves, as some observers expect. He will get to nominate both the chair and vice chair next year, and it is likely that the remaining members will think about leaving as well when Yellen departs. But the early nominees will tell us a lot about Trump’s priorities and long-term plans—hopefully for the better.

Meanwhile, the Fed is in the middle of a long-overdue policy turn. There’s still a risk that they will find they started tightening just in time for a recession, which is also long overdue.

Surprises and Black Swans

Black swans aren’t a risk limited to the world of finance; they happen in politics too. Such an event could push aside all the best-laid plans and change everything.

Canadian bubble: Our neighbors to the north are at their own turning point. The Canadian economy was riding high in the commodity boom but has run into problems after two years of sharply lower oil prices. Since then Canada has avoided recession but has not enjoyed much growth.

Canada also has a housing bubble that looks increasingly ready to pop. House prices have little to do with oil and everything to do with Chinese buying property.

What happens in Canada will tell us something important about China and vice versa. Anything that keeps Chinese money from leaving China will raise the odds of Canada’s bubble popping.

US energy policy matters to Canada too. The country’s huge oil sands deposits would help its export balance, but in some cases the best access requires pipelines through the US, like the Keystone that Obama has held up. Trump can help Canada by letting that project go forward.

Crowded exits in Europe: I thought there was a good chance the Italian bank crisis would come to a head in 2016. The Italians seem to have yet again delayed the inevitable. Reality hasn’t fundamentally changed, though. Troubled institutions are not going to get better on their own, nor is the new government going to miraculously gain public confidence.

Saving Italian banks will take multiple hundreds of billions of euros, which Italy does not have, nor do they technically even have the legal right to unilaterally bail these banks out. They would have to utilize an ECB facility that does not now exist to get that much money, and such a measure would require German approval.

I keep telling you that Italy is the most dangerous economic issue on the world front. Attention must be paid.

That said, Europe is quite capable of staving off disaster. They are professionals at that. They can do it again this time if nothing else goes wrong. That’s a big if.

NATO: The defense alliance partially overlaps with the EU but also includes Turkey. Trump wants the other member states to increase their defense spending. He says, correctly, that they aren’t paying their fair share and has openly questioned whether the US would come to their aid in an attack.

The Baltic countries and Poland are very concerned, as they are the most exposed to potential Russian aggression.

Does Putin intend to attack and try to occupy one of those countries? I really rather doubt he will, but he can cause all kinds of problems without attacking. Fear alone is sufficiently troublesome.

As with Italy, though, fear has consequences. Leaders can juggle only so much. When too many things happen at once, the risk rises that someone will drop a ball.

Asian angst: Relationships within Asia are in flux, to say the least. Trump’s phone call with the Taiwanese president and subsequent comments show he’s willing to roll back prior commitments in order to get better ones. We could see some major changes in 2017.

China has other problems too. They are holding the domestic economy together with astonishing amounts of debt. New liquidity can’t leave the country due to capital controls, but it has to go somewhere. The result is rolling asset bubbles that make even Vancouver housing prices look flat.

The transition from an economy driven by exports to one led by domestic demand is probably going as well as it can, but that’s not saying much. The process may accelerate if Trump has his way.

Over in Japan, something interesting is happening. The job market is unbelievably tight. I saw in a Wall Street Journal report last week that each available worker has two job offers on average. The unemployment rate is historically low.

In a normal market, you would expect employers to compete for workers by raising wages, right? But it isn’t happening. Wages are flat or even falling. Deflation has changed the psychology for two generations of workers and managers. Employees are afraid to demand more, and companies are afraid to pay more.

It’s also a potentially ominous sign for the US. The Fed and many others are watching labor markets closely for signs of wage inflation. Rising wages are one of the factors that would justify tighter interest-rate policies. Yet, Japan shows that unemployment can stay low for years without necessarily causing wage inflation.

Japan is another potential target of Trump’s trade policy. Unlike China, Japan really is devaluing its currency. The policy is working too, in terms of promoting exports. But those exports don’t all go to the United States. Japan sells China much of its industrial equipment and technology, demand for which will presumably drop if Trump succeeds in reducing Chinese exports.

Final Thoughts

We enter 2017 with more question marks than I can count. Even if all the policymakers are competent and have good intentions, stuff happens.

Now, more than ever, economic risk around the world emanates from our governments and central banks.

Trump has the traditional 100 days to deliver something to keep the optimism going. Hopefully, a Congress that is nominally Republican controlled can agree on important measures and move more quickly than we have seen it move in quite a while.

There have been only a few times when I was not optimistic about the coming year, but thankfully this is again one of the optimistic times. I’m actually as pumped as I have been in a long time.

2016 has been a year of major surprises. Frankly, I think 2017 has the potential to offer even more challenges than 2016 did.

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