#but also its funny if he doesnt HAVE a last name

[hotlinedreaming]

Technically Bob, Frank and Dexter could be called primary color trio cause they're red, blue and yellow respectively. Send post

[potatobugz]

what if I didn't go to bed actually and just drew my fantrolls again

[babeygirlbuckley]

kinda tired of all these parent redemption arcs tbh. give chimney a gun

[kyuala]

hmm

[the-acid-pear]

Actually i just realized how effective was even the whole "whipping memory whole" thing for Harry if he still has fucking PTSD from the war? Like sure he'd have told his whole life and shit but to have such a strong reaction like that one review implies he had would require him actually remembering more than he should.

[todayisafridaynight]

still thinking about how my friend said my dad looked like a yakuza last night like 😭😭 ??

[sallytwo]

im soso curious what is jack doing can you tell me about how annoying he is

ok he's not bad as a character. i think he's kind of funny he's a bit of a cunt and gets kicked around a lot and is a fucking thing and if he wasn't just. wesley 2: the replacement i would find him kind of awesome. he is endearing it's just that the writers just hate me and want me dead. also nothing can top the accidental comedy of normal gifted kid who coped with insane depression by ascending this plane of reality and becoming a time god. im sorry jackie but you cant outdo that no matter how hard you try.

[waywardsalt]

writing down some notes for bellum traits/speculative biology/whatever so here's a couple so far

he's cold blooded but can't die due to extreme temperatures, it just makes it harder for him to function.

amphibious in the sense that he can survive in both water and air, though he doesn't really need to breathe, if anything he mostly interacts with water and air through traversal differences.

he does move like a squid, he can just float around but to move faster he does need to move his tentacles for slight propulsion and steering, and does intake and jet out water or air for some extra speed. he is not literally a squid creature but he is very similar.

he's got little barbs on the undersides of his tentacles (similar to the texture of a cat's tongue) which help with grabbing onto and holding things.

he can pull his main eye down into his body if he wants to use his mouth as... a mouth, or when he creates those little goop things or otherwise to spit out that purple substance.

[chisungie]

.

[hiddenbeks]

hmmmmmm rotating idea for a new skyrem character......

[aroacettorney]

tbh i feel like ludger should have committed more nuanced but inexcusable atrocities unknown to people on the level of light yagami for this narrative / aup ending to work because otherwise it doesnt make any damn sense.

ludger during the international trial: i hereby plead guilty to identity impersonation, large-scale thievery, mass murders, torturing, and destruction of the holy bretus kingdom as the demon king. due to the magnitude of my crimes, i believe i deserve a death sentence.

jury group #1, elisa & wolford, who knew his identity was sus since ages ago and even helped him keep it hidden: ......

jury group #2, eileen & facius, who very definitely have often committed political assassinations in the shadow: ......

jury group #3, marias & mi6, whose job is literally torturing people for intel: ......

jury group #4, all knight captains of the exilion kingdom, who are known for mercilessly and indiscriminately eliminating every threat against the exilion royalty: ......

jury group #5, everyone who attended the holy war, voluntarily or involuntarily, and even lent a hand in killing the holy emperor themselves: ......

[sulfies]

I do think Altair, Ezio and Connor be mortified by the concept of Animus but At first they would probobly think that its funny, like Ezio would be going "so you just lie down, watch us go about and wake up with our skills?.... Thats cheating!!!" Altair would be prob a bit salty. Connor would wish he had that of an easy time training.

Then they learn its not like "lying down and resting while animus does the work" at all;

Desmond wakes w muscle spasms and phantom pains from injuries he never got. He has chronic insomnia because his sense of time has been blinded so much he is basically jetlagged 24/7. He doesnt remember how long a day is supossed to go, how slow a month passes, how decades indeed take decades. He has backpain from lying down all day without being able to move, then his muscles protest when he has to move out of animus because thats the only time he used them. He forgets to eat, sit, drink, shower till someone tells him because he didnt have to in animus. He is shocked when people speak to him unprompted because there was always a reason for someone to talk to him first in animus.

Then they learn about his bleeds, how he became a puzzle of their skillset but also their minds. How he forgets his likes and dislikes because he has been others daily, longer than he has been himself in a while. He forgets where he is, if he is supossed to be there, if what he is seeing is supossed to be there. He forgets his name sometimes, replies to anything but his own even if the person is in the room as well. How he freaks out when he sees his reflection sometimes, remembering it as a strangers face. How he sees and talks to things that arent there but maybe was or will be.

They learn he isnt even himself sometimes, cant remember how to be. He doesnt know if he is mad at someone because he doesnt like them or if its Others feelings bleeding. They learn some of his own memories been forever replaced by their own and he doesnt even realize he never met that person only Connor has met before. He cant remember the day his mom got him his 5th birthday gift but Ezio's 5th birthday and his new gift of a carved horse figure is fresh in his mind. He doesnt remember his girlfriend from when he was 19 but he remembers Altaïr's one crush that lasted a week. He cant remember if he ever tried a dish but knows if one of them would like it based on the ingridients. He cant remember faces of his classmates at the farm but knows the novices names by heart.

They learn while they might have sacrificed their bodies and years for their training Desmond has sacrificed his whole self for it.

And it doesnt seem like cheating anymore.

[dodgeballstuckonthegymceiling]

Thank god, someone is writing for TADC 😭😭 Its so good and Ive rewatched the pilot way too many times because its actually funny

Could you write some Caine x reader where he finds himself having a crush on the new human who has arrived but he’s also just…oblivious to what feelings are so doesnt realize it? He’s so goofy, I love him

This is an amazing ask and thank you for sending it in :)

Caine having a crush on the new Reader

★ The first thing he did after giving you a new name and explaining where you are was to bring you around the grounds. Show you all the places you can go and the places you shouldn't. Pretty standard introduction.

★ While he showed you around it became apparent that you were a bit different from the other humans. He just couldn't put his finger on it. Oh well, he'll figure it out later! (Spoiler: he doesn't)

★ He doesn't realize what his feelings are trying to tell him. Sure, he knew that he liked being around you but he didn't think it was that big of a deal. Caine tried to not let his fondness for you overshadow his roal as the ringleader.

★ It can be compared to a parent trying not to have a favorite child. Yes, he has one. But he's worried that the others would feel less special if he said anything. He's gotta love the 22-45 yo children equally!

★ He's the last person to realize he has a crush on you. Everyone is talking bets on when he'll figure it out. Except for Kinger, the chess piece is so oblivious to his surroundings it's not even funny.

★ The moon is so jealous of you. Even downright mean to you. Between the moon and the sun you should choose the sun. The choice is yours after all. "Oh, it's you.." "Caine, don't you think your new friend is a bit much?"

★ Personal space? We don't know her. He's touchy with everyone but he's even moreso with you. Unless of course you ask him not to touch you, then he'll respect your boundaries and stop.

★ He'd like to tell you about some ideas he has for future adventures. One condition though, you cant tell anyone what he shows you. You gotta pinky promise him! He can't have any surprises ruined, now can he?

★ Untill further notice, you will be labeled as his best friend.

[faytears]

percy is middle eastern (specifically lebanese) argue with god

are headcanons about percys ethnicity still cool in 2023. idk im forcing you all to look at it anyway

no way in hell would the entire fucking country look at a little 12 year old white boy and be like "yeah I definitely believe that this child is a terrorist" like they did in TLT

described as looking 'Mediterranean', tans easily

not uncommon for ppl in the levant to have the dark hair/complexion + light eyes combo

also not uncommon for (non-muslim) swana ppl in the US to have vaguely western-sounding names. his last name was anglicized don't ask questions

fun nod to civilizations like the phoenicians being seafarers, poseidon's multiple connections to phoenicia in greek myth + historically being worshipped in the area

he would use the heinous insults that exist in arabic as casually as one would talk about the weather. he doesnt even actually know arabic he just knows how to say fuck you in all its iterations.

just realized how funny this hc would be in light of that comment he made in SoM shitting on hummus LMAOOOOOO

[renaultmograine]

I actually thought too hard about this during Shadowlands and came to the conclusion that he would in fact be Kyrian, as the whole divide between Bastion and Maldraxxus is if your duty bound or people bound, for lack of a better term. The whole lesson with Alexandros is that he's not fit for Bastion because he's lessened as a person without his memories. Renault is shown to be suffering with guilt over killing his father for years afterwards, and is driven mad over the whole ordeal; he could probably stand to forget being manipulated by a dreadlord and just embrace wearing battle skirts.

Also imo it makes the whole Maldraxxi-Kyrian situation funnier because I always imagined Renault as one of the Hands of Courage (Xandria's second in command) and so I was just imagining Xandria being sooo annoyed she has to deal with this Maldraxxi guy who she knows is the dad of one of her Hands (and probably heard all his fucken problems from life)

Do y'all think Renault's soul would go in Maldraxxus or Revendreth? Cause it would be funny if he went to Maldraxxus and duked it out with his father again

[dullgecko]

Adaine has a sixth sense when her notes for class are in danger

Kristen can play saxophone (she chose it to learn cause haha funny name)

Fabian writes love letters as part of a Cupid's association he started for fun (and to finally use his calligraphy skills)

Fig is slowly teaching her army of Baby's to sing backup properly

Gorgug knows all the constellations from sleeping on the lawn some nights when his bed broke

Riz falls asleep instantly if somebody sits near him with a blanket thrown on him

And cooking headcanons are:

Can cook: Gorgug (the most competent) and Kristen (only corn related dishes)

Can cook (shouldn't/will make monstrosities on purpose/by accident): Riz (everything has caffeine) and Adaine (could cook with parental supervision)

DONT LET IN KITCHEN (WILL BURN WATER): Fabian and Fig (+Kristen when not making dishes with corn)

Yay a bunch, had to wait until i got home so i had a keyboard so sorry for the wait but ilu thankyou <3

Adaine has a sixth sense when her notes for class are in danger

She gets full blown promonitions on more than one occasion and has had to yank her bag out of harms way at the last second. Even if she lost her notes though she'd be fine, every night when she gets home she re-writes everything neatly into a second notebook thats kept safe inside her room (and at the end of every lesson she takes a photo of her notes for that day on her crystal and saves a backup to the cloud just in case)

Kristen can play saxophone (she chose it to learn cause haha funny name)

She also chose it becasue it has maximum potential to be sexy and annoying as hell. Her first choice was bagpipes, but tracker ripped them to shreds after the first note so that was a no-go.

Fabian writes love letters as part of a Cupid's association he started for fun (and to finally use his calligraphy skills)

He has an anonymous account set up so people can submit their requests. Once they're written he sends both a photo of the letter and mails the physical copy to wherever it needs to go.

Fig is slowly teaching her army of Baby's to sing backup properly

Very slowly, incredibly slowly. They still havent quite mastered the art of the middle volume so all their parts have to be very quiet or screeched at the top of their lungs.... its a work in progress.

Gorgug knows all the constellations from sleeping on the lawn some nights when his bed broke

He knows them, he however does not know all the proper names at all. Fabian is appauled and spends more than a few nights during the nightmare king quest quizzing him until he gets the names correct and will sometimes, during parties at night, point at a section of sky with a stern face from across the yard and Gorgug will spit out the name of whatever he's pointing at to the confusion or amusement of anyone he's currently with.

Riz falls asleep instantly if somebody sits near him with a blanket thrown on him

The crucial second component of this is Riz has to first be kindof sleepy and it cant be just anybody. Throw a blanket on a rogue unexpectedly and you're liable to suddenly be in a lot of pain and with a shredded blanket. If a friend sits next to him with a blanket on THEIR shoulder and offers a spot underneath it with them he's gone within four seconds once he accepts the offer.

------------------------------------------------------------

Cooking headcannons

Gorgug can cook, he parents taught him when he was still (relitively) small. He cooks a lot of his own meals because its often a LOT of food and he doesnt want to bother his parents all the time (he still doesnt cook quite enough, which is why he's so lanky in comparison to other half-orcs; he's chronically underfed but at least he gets all his vitamins).

Kristen is great with food that doesnt require heating, she makes amazing sandwiches and salads but the INSTANT heat is involved you need someone on standby with a fire-extinguisher. She will forget there's something cooking, it will boil dry/overcook/catch fire. She is banned from using the stove. Helios blessing was literally the only thing saving her corn-based dishes (literal divine intervention), and thats not really on the table anymore.

Adaine needed a lot of help initially in the kitchen because she had never ever used a cooking appliance before but once she's shown how she never forgets. She is not so great at 'cooking' but she is amazing at baking (which is practically wizardry in edible form fight me). Baking requires EXACT steps with EXACT measurements and EXACT cooking times. Cooking requires more flexibility and she cannot wrap her head around it (i cooked this steak for the same amount of time as the last one but it basically became shoe leather/was practically raw). Jawbone buys her a recipe book full of cookies and pastries and calls it her grimoire. She cries and keeps it tucked safely with her spellbooks, it never enters the kitchen lest it get dirty, any recipies she wants to make are copied down onto a sheet of paper like a prepared spell and taken with her when she wants to bake.

Riz's definition of edible does NOT match those of anyone else (though most of his meals consist of 1) coffee and 2) some sort of pre-made meal bar). He does cook for his mum if he gets home first though, and by goblin standards its actually pretty tasty. Goblins have mythril-stomachs though, and unless they're getting ACTIVLY poisoned they can eat just about anything (most food-born parasites cant survive in goblins anyway). It comes down to an argument of 'what do you MEAN you have to eat your chicken/pork well-done? i dont understand. You're fine with steaks being rare. why would you debone the fish/chicket the bones are the best part.'. Also the point where most food would be considered spoiled is well before the Gukgaks would be worried about it. If he's cooking for you, you just have to be specific and you'll be fine (he'll silently judge you for being picky, even while he carefully over-cooks the meat and cuts half the 'edible' parts off your vegetables).

Fabian is 100% banned from making ANYTHING. He made a sandwich inedible somehow, he was using the same ingrediants as EVERYONE ELSE. Kristin swears after casting detect evil and good on it that it was Infernal. Fig threw it through a portal to hell just in case.

Fig probably can cook, she just pretends she cant because its funnier that way. Her mother is a ranger, if anything she can probably make THE best campfire meals out of the whole squad but tells nobody and pretends to be totally clueless. One day while out on a mission the squad wakes up to a full fantasy-english breakfast cooked over a campfire including fresh bread and tea and Fig pretends that she has no idea where it came from even though she was the ONLY PERSON AWAKE.