#but also I kind of want to look like Elle Woods

[astrogre]

Planets in the second house

Here is the 2nd house of the money series, I no longer post astrology but I decided to release what I had left. For context check out my original money houses post which explains what the 2nd house shows e.g. what kind of money. Well, since I love talking about money, let’s get into it 😁.

Jupiter in 2nd house

Jupiter here can make you a lavish spender, you can spend quite a lot here because Jupiter rules excess, and can even represent overindulgence. But spending on yourself makes you feel limitless, you feel good not only spending but also earning a lot for yourself, it improves your self esteem and only makes you further confident and joyful about yourself. This is the retail therapy placement except unlike Venus, you guys don’t do it to experience something but more so to express what is within you; abundance. You have so much, so why not? It’s very much of a “I have nothing to loose, I have more at home”. It’s like the “we have McDonald’s at home, but I’ll buy it here as well”. It’s the kind of person who orders from 3 different restaurants for one Uber eats order because they see it as: ‘why would I order from one place like a pauper when my fav dessert and coffee place can be included’. These natives refuse to accept less than they deserve. It’s either go big or go home. You own a lot of assets or you can a small amount of BIG assets worth a lot. E.g. the native can own many houses across the world in different countries OR own one big apartment complex in another country

You earn your assets in a role that requires you to to have a lot of confidence and positive attitude, like if you’re not then it can really mess up your earnings and even have clients or stakeholders question your competence or why you’re even in your position. With Jupiter also linked to travel, culture and foreign things, the way you make money will also need you to appeal to many audiences almost uniting them, for an example being an ambassador for your country while you live abroad, or learning multiple languages to communicate to clients. Your career is very much based on your personal self esteem and beliefs which makes me always look at this placement as the self employed placement, or in a high office.

Jupiter also represents teaching, or higher learning this doesn’t mean you’ll be a teacher but rather your job can make others learn from you, people look up to you as a guide, unlike sun which guides by simply existing, Jupiter here makes you express yourself in a way of which people learn, rather than just looking up to you, more like the way a students looks up to their professors, not a: “I want to be you”, but: “I want to do what you do the way you do it, because you do it best”. That’s how you guide. A guide on how to become wealthy or a guide on how to become more confident in the self. This positive ideology of yours makes you wealthy because your assets are built from the foundations of your own healthy inner self esteem, making you accept nothing but better, your bar is in heaven and anything below that is not right.

I’ve noticed natives here can talk about money assets and large sums of wealth as if they’re nothing. Talking about being a millionaire is an average Tuesday conversation. It reminds me of Elle woods in legally blonde who when asked how they got into Harvard law school they responded with “what.. like it’s hard?”. The way you guys also make money is effortless to you. It’s just the way you are. These people can find navigating their career paths easier than other placements because of the ease Jupiter brings

This is more of an observation but I’ve noticed the cockier the people are here with this placement the more they can end up earning of benefit from that. Sometimes even being flashy and bragging about your lifestyle will draw others to it because it only highlights your abundance and how you are fit to lead having such lavish things

You guys spend your money on things that help you grow. And that’s very circumstantial because in the 2nd house, for some that’s positive behavioral therapy (self value) and others it would be a new building with clean views (expansion). It is rather dependent on the sign as well. For an example: if you’re an influencer: purchasing the best jewels and house to flaunt online. An athlete: having the most stupendous savings so they can launch their own sports brand, or not be held back by sponsors budget. A mathematician may be owning the most calculation intensive advanced degree in Quantum physics regardless of the price (as the 2nd house also shows the skills needed for us to earn money) Jupiter can give you the best of the best no matter how extravagant.

E.g Selena Gomez, Jeffrey Star, Princess Diana, Madonna, Donald Trump, Megan Fox, Bill Gates, Shakira, Audrey Hepburn, Winston Churchill, Roger Federer, Charlie Sheen, Kylie Jenner

All these people are known to approach themselves with such confidence and high self esteem being leaders and earning money because of the way they see themselves and own it. They’re all the kind of people to waltz around with high end expensive items like it’s nothing because they know they deserve it, regardless if they’re politicians, royalty, business men, computer scientists, musicians, actors or athletes.

There’s so much more I could write 4 pages just on this placement but I need to write about the other planets so next, next.

Sun in the 2nd house

You’re literally known for being the wealthy one as Sun shows where we shine and can attain recognition, or you could be known as the person who’s heavily invested in their earnings or for what you spend them on, people can always be pointing out the nice things you own, this can show someone who’s always working even when they’re not on shift because they’re always invested in their income, it’s like they live on a material sphere like a finance bro or a cryptocurrency market nerd, you could have a wealthy father too. But this placement is the epithet of a rich auntie who only is known to be wealthy and thriving, or at worst could make you appear as someone overly materialistic only concerned about money, always working. But who cares, it’s where you shine the brightest.

When you spend you do it as a form of self expression. Sun in 2nd house means the things you buy are a way for you to express yourself, this can be purchasing artistic houses fine tuned to your personal preferences whether it be artistic, efficient etc. is all based on the sign. But regardless your assets, savings and possessions are rather dependent on the sign of the sun, since the sun planet doesn’t explain quantity of what’s in the house like Saturn or Jupiter but more so the level of its importance. Your personal income is VERY important to you, you need to be stable to feel secure and balanced, otherwise you can feel insecure, have a weak ego and just feel unable to function which gives you bad publicity and makes earning more further difficult.

For you, spending is something you do because “it’s how I am”. If you don’t spend it feels like at times you’re having to withhold yourself or put yourself away, dim your light. Spending money you can’t replace is a big Nono for you, your possessions are an extension of yourself, which is why it can trigger you if someone mistreats your belongings, looses them or breaks them it is very hurtful because they hold such a strong importance to you. This is the native who couldn’t be separated from that one toy as a child because it was theirs and they were one, if you want the native you must accept their assets too, which is how these people can actually be rather generous because when you feel like you can be yourself around someone you can give them your things because it’s like you’re giving that person yourself. You can also be proud of your class or maybe you can’t hide it, regardless of whether it’s lower or upper because that’s your belief or it’s set as a precedent. You’re not the most generous unless you really trust the person you’re giving to won’t do something silly.

I’ve noticed these natives can be disliked for pointing out discrepancies in the way a value or financial system works e.g Jordan Peterson, Karl Marx, Bella Hadid, I think it’s because with the sun here they can point and direct others to values that are not being talked about enough or can highlight concepts so that everyone can understand.

How you make your personal income requires you to be the forefront of a team, or a company, or a business, or a department, or a brand etc. I think of leading positions and being known for how much you earn benefiting you because the sun paves the way, is given recognition, the light directs us and forces everyone to look at your assets and focus on that part of yourself, you need to be intentional on the things you purchase because people are always assuming your earnings based on the brand or quality of what you own. When sun is in the 2nd House it means you can be a key determinant of how much you make depending on your performance, if you steal the show and take the light 🎭 at your job, your payroll commends you with a large income, the audience is happy and everyone probably knows about it because it’s essential for your job -for an example you may have to list your contractor service prices online, have received recognition as 30 under 30 in Forbes or you could be a public company that must declare its financial statement thus increasing visibility and sales.

You know everything about where and what’s going on in your accounts and pockets, this is the kind of person able to identify that they overpaid for a house or the listed equity pay in a company is not enough for the position they’re in. Your role needs you to point things out that are out of place or could be better, you make the most money when you’re in charge because the Sun leads. The rest of the planets follow.

You guys may save and spend to solidify your status and security, you need to feel embodied in your finances and can have a decent amount of savings to prevent loosing that ability to make a ‘statement of the self’. Remember the sun is tied to the ego so you can also become rather immature using money to triumph over others if negatively impacted.

Natives with this placement: E.g George Clooney, Elvis Presley, Tom Cruise, Cristiano Ronaldo, Paris Hilton, Oprah Winfrey, Kourtney Kardashian, Bella hadid, Kris Jenner, Jeffrey Epstein, Emma Roberts, Jennie Kim, Jordan Peterson, Karl Marx

Notice how they all are known for having a leading, striving image based on either income or values. Jordan Peterson being one of the well known horsemen of male self value podcasts, Oprah Winfrey listed on Forbes known for just being wealthy and exposing systems or people, kris Jenner being the founder of the kardashian Jenner enterprise as a “momager”, I could go on for each of these individuals.

Pluto in 2nd house

You only spend with purpose here, you spend your money on things that give you an upper hand, control over a system, your values or spending on a power you are supportive of. When I think of this placement I imagine it being someone who has what they call “F you money”. “Fuck you money” is the amount of financial resources required for the average person to say “Fuck you” to their employer but still be able to meet their financial commitments over the long term. That’s what you guys have, in fact it’s rather intimidating, it’s similar to the same level of freedom as Uranus has in finances except the difference is that you guys want to be free from control so that you can control others when you feel like it. Your mindset to income, assets and finances is “I want, I will have”. “It belongs to me”. You can even go by underhanded means to acquire wealth.

Pluto in 2nd house makes you spend on things you desire, things that make you not only look powerful like the sun in 2H but BECOME powerful, for an example property owners that bid obnoxiously high at auction houses for the final say (just so no one else can have the item) or the billionaires in Monaco known for their yacht parades where only the well accomplished can participate. Of course you may not be a billionaire but the point is, you spend big money on things that are of significance to your power, that speak levels of how important you are. Otherwise you have lots of money in savings that you’re waiting to spend on later for the perfect moment.

Pluto in 2nd house is not someone you want to start a legal battle with, here you guys have extensive amounts to spend for power, an arsenal for war. You won’t ever allow yourself to run dry of resources to a point where you can’t defend yourself and let others run all over you, this is the child you could NOT get lunch money from. They’d rather fight with their nails pulled out than give you what is rightfully theirs. You could have even grown up in an environment where money was power, and if you didn’t have enough it would impact your value. E.g. upper class private school, echelon family, elitist classist peers, dangerous scary people who only stopped if you were wealthy. You can also feel entitled to anything of value believing it belongs to you. This is the kind of person who when they say “I’d kill for that” or “I’d sell you if it mean it could..” you need to side eye.

This placement makes me think of Bruce Wayne (Batman) in the way the native spends, and their attitudes to money and the self, it’s like everything is a power trip and it seems the native is overly blessed with resources, “if I don’t have it all I’m nothing. But if you have less than me, you’re nothing and I’ll tell you what to do”. Johnny Depp actually has this placement. I googled his spending habits to confirm if they’re are true to my description of Pluto in 2H

As we can see he used his money to fulfill his desires, obsessions and image. He also sued the fuck out of any media or person that bad mouthed him leading him to eventually win the amber heard trial where most would have given up wasting money on the multiple cases.

The skills needed for you in your job may be things like understanding psychology, dissecting behaviors, research, actually dissecting something like a surgeon, mortician, taxidermy artist or piercing someone like a piercing artist or gang member would. You need to scare people to make that bank. (Also made me think of how Johnny depps most profitable roles were as Jack sparrow, Edward scissor hands, sweeny Todd, all to do with slicing using a sword scissors or a knife).

You earn your income by making orders, being in control, expressing your obsessive darker values, exerting intense behavior, essentially “playing the villain”. You’ll see with these natives that when they play villains or are villainised online or have a bad reputation, work in taboo subjects that’s when they start making the most money e.g.

Doja cat- her dark aesthetic , Michael B Jordan- biggest payout from Killmonger role, Vivien Leigh- 2 Grammys and most money from narcissistic power hungry role as scarlett o'hara in gone with the wind , Trisha Paytas- her never ending YouTube dramas and controversial takes which people can’t stop watching, Zoe Kravitz- playing catwoman, Rocco Siffredi- an Italian pornographic actor, director and producer. Known as the "Italian Stallion", Marilyn Manson- again known for controversies and dark imagery, Robert Downey Jr-His career has been characterized by critical and popular success in his youth, followed by a period of substance abuse and legal troubles, before a resurgence of commercial success in middle age.

Also Pluto is here it can make your finances fluctuate similarly to the way Uranus would but less frequently but FAR more dramatically. You can go from 0-100 in wealth. You can come from a very asset rich background only to loose it all or come from rages to riches. When people discover how much you earn, your income, or your spending habits etc. they’ll be really intimidated by you, scared in the way that they feel like you could make them disappear (whether that’s because you outdo them or they genuinely see your money as life threatening is circumstantial lol). You may be attracted to darker possessions like a black chic penthouse, ruby, emerald jewels, sleek cars. The classic wealthy supervillain kind of assets. Your peers are also very jealous of your income.. it’s best to keep it secret and let your power speak for itself.

Mars in 2nd House

Very similar to Pluto except you guys don’t spend for power or to triumph others but rather for passion, if your passion is to outdo peers, you’ll spend. If your passion is to protect something you’ll spend on that. You spend because it excites you and brings a drive, a sense of purpose. You LOVVEEEE working to attain income, earning your income is like a battlefield, you love putting in the effort to get it similarly to Saturn except you guys are a powerhouse, you don’t have an off button. It can also make you someone who overworks themselves, addicted to the adrelanin rush which also indicates that your job requires you to work under stress, competition or harsh environments like a politician, manual labourer, rapper, lawyer, athlete, dancer, entertainer, engineering, those people who get paid 300k to climb up tall dangerous buildings to change a light etc. Money comes in quick for you, you could be paid weekly or just large sums rather frequently. Raises aren’t unheard of with this placement because they’re always willing to negotiate rebuttal and prove their value to their client and bosses.

You guys can purchase assets as a venture pursuit, for fun, earn when you’re dissed and profit from people attacking you. Michael Jackson has this placement and one time Eminem made a diss track about him so he bought his record label and owned his music and now makes money every time Eminem disses (angers) him in the song. That’s a royalty for every curse word.

Receipts.

The way you make your income requires you to take quick action, express your aggression, and confront using your wealth, you fight with your money, so of course it can indicate competition. Here this placement can make you own the best of the best and it can be a competition to you, you want it all. It reminds me of Patrick Bateman how he couldn’t accept his peers having better business cards than him, that’s how you guys are like with your income. It also reminds me of natives who actually have this placement: Vladimir Putin, Martin Luther King, Alexander the Great, Rachel McAdams —— notice how the behaviour that made them the most income forced them to be competitive, relentless, bitchy even petty? (Regina George)

Should you discover your being paid unfairly or that your peers make more than you, you’ll be PISSED. This placement makes me imagine someone owning fast driving cars like Ferraris, race cars, motorbikes, purchase a high rise building, have insane interior decor in there home that’s loud, intense and personifies the Martian sign.

You perceive money as a way to compete, it’s like your car in a formula 1 race so obviously natives here can try to improve their car to the latest model, in other words constantly attempting to make more, own more, learn more skills for their job. You guys are highly motivated in whatever makes you money because earning that money gives you so much ambition and drive. You may be attacked and hated for your values especially in the role required to make money, it can invite danger. Yet that’s where you thrive -nobody else can do it like you.

If these natives are saving up money it’s for a plan to attack and use for later. They prefer to spend as quickly and as passionately as they like to earn money unless they’re waiting for a special occasion. E.g saving up for a car, a new home gym upgrade etc

This placement literally reminds me of 7 rings “I want it I got it”, that’s how you view money, you spend because “I want it”, “I’m driven to have more”. Like a fisherman pulling its reel, a hunter chasing its prey, gaining income is your stimulant activity

Individuals with this placement:

Vladimir Putin, Martin Luther King, Alexander the Great, Rachel McAdams, Jim Carrey, Elizabeth Taylor, Michael Jordan, Michael Jackson, Winona Ryder, Russel Brand, George W. Bush, Neymar, Richard Ramirez, Joan of Arc, Jennie Kim

Notice how all these individuals thrive off making income or attaining value with a bad boy/girl, dangerous attitude?

2nd house in Neptune

People say that having Neptune in the second house is not that good because Neptune is illusive, very wishy washy and the only way you can get money is “in your dreams”. But Neptune is the planet of even the impossible, you get money “FROM YOUR DREAMS”. Those fantasies you’ve had of making so much money you could swim in it, doing something nobody could ever imagine is a possibility with this placement because if you’ve dreamt it, it can become a reality. If you guys have always had a dream of becoming a certain person e.g a pilot, an entrepreneur, a model, inventor, a leader, singer, scientist whatever it is -that calling is your answer. I kid you not, during my research the most influential people of all different industries fall under Neptune in 2nd house. There’s a reason for that. (You’ll see the list of otherworldly accomplished people at the end)

People don’t believe you guys because they literally don’t see your value, Neptune can cause illusion, meaning others can’t see what you’re aiming for clearly. Isaac Newton literally has this placement and people thought he was crazy for asking why the apples fall down yet his vision created the future we have today. You can appear unrealistic, like you assume everything will go as planned, or that you think you’re right when you’re not, people think you’re delusional, they may even see you as dumb. At worst it reminds me of pearl from the movie Pearl who believes she was supposed to be a star. At best: Steve Jobs who has this placement and proves how he saw a future in Apple that nobody else did

Him gaining income from Pixar company that deals with imagery, fantasy and film (all things that Neptune represents) really is the cherry on top.

That’s what Neptune here makes you: a visionary, it’s as if you went back in time and brought a concept from the 2150s to our present day, people cannot fathom your values and your skills, you can seem almost too good at the way you make income, you can be entrancing, deceptive even. Neptune also represents the future, with this placement you’re able to plan, predict, fantasise or act in a way that is beyond your time and will benefit further generations. As long as you have some groundedness to act on your dream with practicality and realistic planning, you’re literally set. You set your goalpost in the sky now you’re tasked with having to learn how to fly which is why most struggle to believe in you. Don’t just say you will one day, actually act on it, do not let your dream die.

You can romanticise your job and the way you make income, you leer at a lifestyle of spending or earning lots of money, to you that’s something that just feels intuitively right. It’s like you guys close your eyes at night, wind down envisioning being in an ultra wealthy lifestyle while you’re laying in a stuffy bunk bed that you have to share with your siblings. You don’t see your reality as your end result but more so as a bus stop. You spend because “I’m promised more” you guys like to borrow from the future, you can and up spending money because you believe you’ll be paid soon or you can spend into overdraft because you need it for your success e.g an upcoming model going into overdraft to pay for her plane ticket to their debut fashion show.

It’s almost Venusian how you indulge in your assets, income and possessions except you make it look like a dream with a touch of hope, it’s like Cinderellas possessions before midnight, it’s so grandiose but if you look very clearly its not so real yet they make it their reality and like Cinderella become the princess they dreamed of being. You know those people who post their evening routines on YouTube in their penthouse showing their work environment and film their lifestyle OR those business advisors who sell courses but actually are broke renting out a mansion as an Airbnb to deceive their followers, that is exactly what it’s like for these natives. You spend your money on things that you’ve always wanted or dreamt of owning which gives of a romanticised impression of the things you own, you show the pros without the cons. I can imagine people like Nara smith having this placement because she sells a fantasy. This is also why you can be good actors. You can purchase homes, cars, art, assets etc. from your favourite tv shows for an example someone with this placement may purchase the Barbie home in real life or recreate Hannah Montanas house because they’ve always wanted it. You can also own things that are exact copies of what someone else has, maybe even dupes. Neptune likes to copy. In general the kind of assets you own are very much crafted with some kind of illusionary touch to it due to Neptunes fickle nature.

Your way of generating income requires you to sell a fantasy, or to do the impossible, you have to appeal to others, lie even, your job requires you to have ideas that make people want to believe you. You could be naive or prey on others naivety. That’s usually why Neptune 2H jobs are associated with deception. Although it points to someone being an artist (illusions) but I actually think people with this placement could work great in sales and be good persuaders, I think they could do anything, because their power is persuasive. The actors with this placement play in roles of which their characters are beyond life, have this sense of naivety to the bad, their characters complete the impossible and are a symbol of the future e.g Jennifer Lawrence (known for katniss Everdeen), Natalie Portman (Black swan and Padme)

Now when it comes to savings… I must admit you guys don’t think of potential setbacks as much as the other planets. It’s not that you fail to save long term goal but more so approach it like “I’d really like to have this much saved one day”. You can dream of a life of security but can struggle to act on it, depending on the sign of course. Possessions and income to you aren’t necessarily just resources but more so what you’re destined for. People can view your values, skills, assets etc. as a waste of time, even asking you “why would you waste your money on that?” only to realise that it’s actually a brilliant idea in the future.

Key individuals with Neptune in 2nd house:

Taylor swift- In her 2020 documentary she reads the diary she owned as a child which talked about how she wanted to succeed and was meant to be successful. Jessica McLane a former classmate to Taylor swift says she was bullied because “She was literally, 16 or 17 leaving school to pursue a career that people are telling her that she could never have.” Taylor made her dreams come true and is now a billionaire who will probably achieve a lot more of her dreams if she hasn’t done them already. She also embodies Neptune 2H because of making money from art and has been accused of deceptive behaviour like not allowing other stars to hit #1. Who would have thought that country girl would become a billionaire businesswoman? Taylor probably did.

Ted Bundy- very deceptive, income came from the nativity of people, his persuasion and lies. He used that illusion to lure in victims his possessions were not only the cars he stole from lying, the victims bodies that were never found (Neptune can hide and deceive) but also the hearts of the media, people still adore him in film, romanticising his work, his skills and charm long after the crimes he committed

Anne Frank- her diary will always be a timeless possession that still inspires millions of people to this day, I can imagine at the time of crisis they must have found the concept of her journaling during a genocide illogical and even stupid. Neptune also is associated with selflessness and to this day The Anne Frank Fonds foundation in Switzerland that collects royalties from Anne Frank's diary distributes the money to charities, education projects, and scientific research. Her income is literally given to future dreams. That’s Neptune in the 2H

Donald trump- his real estate empire shows his grandiose approach to material possessions, he’s always known he wanted more money and transformed the amount he was given into so much more

Lana del Rey- such an entrancing otherworldly voice, her voice is described as a siren even, however some argue that it’s deceptive, fake because of her live performances being so different

I would continue highlighting the many ways Neptune 2nd house has impacted people but there’s too many key individuals who have paved history with this placement.

Honourable mentions:

Isaac Newton, Natalie Portman, James Franco, Rafael Nadal, Jennifer Lawrence, Hailey Baldwin, Muhammad Ali, Kris Jenner, Grimes, Justin Bieber, Steve Jobs, Pope Francis, Olivia Rodrigo, Frank Ocean, Edgar Allan Poe, Boris Johnson, O.J. Simpson, Queen Elizabeth I of England, Sydney Sweeney, Lewis Hamilton, Judy Garland, Mitski, Russia (the literal country), Monica Lewinsky, Hedy Lamarr, and Christopher Columbus.

All these people seem so sure of themselves when they tell you how they got to where they are now today, they are so well beyond their time, scheming almost. Their skills, values, possessions, incomes are all things that transcend throughout history as something that paved the future. There is a mix of discoverers and some of these individuals were discovered and once you see what they brought with them it’s like “how come nobody knew??”. Whether it be Christopher Columbus and his findings of America (can be seen as deceptive as Native Americans were residing there), Monica Lewinsky and her affair with the president or Isaac newton and his concept of gravity. I guess we will just never understand the blinding affect Neptune has. All I can say is that if you see someone or a place/event with Neptune in 2nd house… I suggest you keep an eye on them and at least listen to their idea, no matter how unrealistic it may be.

Oh and don’t forget. If a Neptune 2nd house could benefit financially by deception, you’d never know if they are showing the truth. They get away with financial crimes anyway.

Uranus in 2nd house

You intellectualise your spending habits, you can literally justify buying the most bizarre artefact known to man and you will think through before purchasing something and justify it because it’s for “a greater cause” whether that ‘cause’ be another erratic purchase or something that impacts humanity, surprisingly you’re actually right about it’s efficiency. Uranus isn’t a dumb planet, it’s… unique. You have a ‘think smarter not harder’ mindset when it comes to choosing what to buy, it reminds me of those self cleaning vacuum robots that people buy because it fits a niche purpose. You can make spending, earning income or attaining wealth a utilitarian journey, they can even see it as an advancement for humanity, like their pockets are a gift to the people which is why they’re associated with philanthropy, being inventors, activism etc.

These natives are giving but it must be for the right reason. You’d have to pitch to them first for them to support your philanthropic endeavour. Some of you go so far to renounce all your belongings and live in poverty. Many times they are reliant on the philanthropy or giving from others. People’s support may give them assets.

You can spend on specifically niche erratic things like a pet giraffe, a taxidermy raccoon butt sharpener, very random I know -but that’s the point! It’s like people can huddle around your possessions, your house, your car and think that’s so cool or even find it kind of weird, random, funny or just deranged. Sometimes people can look at your belongings and ask themselves ‘what am I even looking at right now?’. Regardless of their reaction people are always shocked, shocked by what you own, how much you own (could be surprisingly wealthy/surprisingly poor) or why you do the things you do. I always see Uranus as that weird kid who got bullied in secondary school which is what these natives may be seen as when it comes to your assets, you may have people trying to label your style, define it, which is why Uranus in 2nd house is associated with owning one of a kind possessions, like a once in a lifetime made car, these natives literally would pre order the Tesla cyber truck unironically, obviously you may have a different style to the cybertruck -but I mean that’s the level of strangeness they exhibit when it comes to their possessions. People can get why you buy the the things you have , it’s cool, unique, intellectual and a conversation starter but… they’re still shocked because although it makes sense, it defies what is normal.

Your home could be filled with weird stuff, whether it be antiques, a maximalist room, taxidermy, anime body pillows or a fully functional robot, that’s the thing, you just don’t know with these individuals. The property and assets you own could be extremely efficient for your needs but very erratic. You may not even live in the property you own, Uranus is detached. You may want to be free from earning income, the 2H shows how you make money and your relationship with it therefore natives here generate income in a way that doesn’t burden them and feels like something they’d do for fun, due to the detachment of Uranus they could work in fields that aren’t congruent with themselves, something they wouldn’t usually be interested in or they can make money by aiding in the freedom of others.

It’s not that you don’t value money, you only value what it can do for you. If it can’t serve the purpose you’re seeking for then it’s pretty much just there and you’ll either spend it on something erratic or save it up to do something erratic. These natives aren’t very good at saving. But since planets here show how you store money, if they do save, Uranus 2nd housers are very witty with it, probably have the best interest rates, investments in cryptocurrency, strange ways of saving storing money that blows peoples minds like “how did you think of that?”. Uranus makes your finances become a spectacle even. Going from high to low very frequently, it’s unstable but these natives (as much as they complain about it) won’t do anything to change except letting go of their assets of course, this is because they want a quick fix to their financial stress, they don’t want to worry about money, they just detach. They have bigger fish to fry. You can stay in the same home for years no matter how much income rises due to it being efficient, I’ve also observed these natives appear humble in their earnings regardless of how much they may make.

The skills needed for you to make your income is most definitely invention, intelligence, you have to think in ways not done before, not tested or tried, kind of like marinette from miraculous ladybug using her lucky charm finding an unpredictable, bizarre way of using it. You need to be odd to do your job, only someone who is eccentric could make money the way that you do, the way you generate income is also liberating for you, people are shocked with what you do to make money, you could have a very niche job that not many people dream of- not because they don’t want it, but because it’s so unique they didn’t know it even existed. It’s almost as if your job is made just for you, you’re set apart from even those in the same field as you and if that industry requires innovation you are the best of your peers, your income is made by expressing parts of yourself that are usually constrained as Uranus liberates, it is rebellion, which is why you do your job so well, it’s a playing field for that side of you, and how you go against authority.

Also for each of the planets in this 2nd house series, I’ve observed that actors make the most income from the roles that fall under their 2nd house planet. With the actors who have Uranus here they usually play in pioneering, leading, out of the box thinking roles etc.:

Benedict Cumberbatch- Played as Sherlock holmes (role required themes of intellect, eccentricity, thinking outside of the box to be Sherlock) same with Dr Strange (very ironic because Uranus literally represents things that are weird). Also he invested in startups such as Tentrr, a camping app, and ScribbleChat, a texting app, (Uranus represents technology)

Andy Samberg- Played as lead detective Jake Brooklyn 99 (very intelligent, unpredictable wordplay involved, solving things, putting bad guys away, emotionally detached)

Adrien Brody- played as Władysław Szpilman in The Pianist (a role where the character had up and down assets, had to constantly think out of the box to survive, used his skills to rebel his circumstances to get by yet never fully reaching financial stability)

You defy by making someone financially suffer for their wrongs, like going on strike, neglecting a clients investment, abandoning assets, you can boycott or fund certain causes. You’re also the kind of person who would do their job for free. You can be petty with finances and buy weird stuff because you can, invest because it contributes to something. You’re intellectual with where you put your money.

Key Individuals with this placement:

George r.r Martin- author of the Game of thrones series, asoiaf is definitely such an innovative piece of fiction, deals with themes of liberation, freedom and is so unhinged it’s unheard of.

Emma Frances Chamberlain- American YouTuber. Time Magazine included her on its list of The 25 Most Influential People On The Internet, writing that "Chamberlain pioneered an approach to vlogging that shook up YouTube’s unofficial style guide. (Income from technology, pioneering, quirkiness, thinking out of the ordinary. All Uranus themes)

Lord Byron- British poet, behaved as if income didn’t exist, very wealthy yet very broke and practically ran away from raising income, died fighting for Greek independence. kept a bear in his room while he was a student at Trinity College in the early 1800s. He's said to have purchased the bear in defiance of the rules that banned students from keeping dogs in college. (Uranus freedom, unhinged and erratic themes while owning weird stuff)

Jacqueline du Pré - a British cellist, today acknowledged as one of the greatest exponents of the instrument. Her interpretation of this work has been described as "definitive" and "legendary. (Unique vision, pioneering)

Yves Saint Laurent- founded his eponymous fashion label. He is regarded as being among the foremost fashion designers in the twentieth century. Yves Saint Laurent can be credited with both spurring the couture's rise from its 1960s ashes and with finally rendering ready-to-wear reputable. (Standing out in his industry, thinking out the box, rebellion to norms)

City of Geneva, Switzerland- long history of income from watchmaking and machinery. (Uranus represents technology and industrial development)

South Korea- makes 70% of its GDP from its electronic exports. The world's second-largest producer of semi-conductors. (Uranus technology and innovative thinking.)

Honourable mentions:

J.R.R. Tolkien (author of The Hobbit and The Lord of the Rings), Malcom X, Venus Williams, Jackie Chan, Avril Lavigne, South Korea (the literal country), Pakistan (the literal country), Lewis Carrol (author of Alice's Adventures in Wonderland and its sequel Through the Looking-Glass, he was also a mathematician and logician), Pablo Picasso, Tiger Woods, Uma Thurman, Francis of Assisi, Sofia Richie, Queen Elizabeth 2nd, Benedict Cumberbatch, Marilyn Manson, Simone de Beauvoir, Gillian Leigh Anderson, Nina Simone, Adrien Brody

All of these individuals made the most when they thought outside of the box and did something different to what people expected, shocking the public makes them wealthy. It’s interesting how I also observed that someone tends to fund these natives lifestyles since they cannot fund it themselves. Notice how these individuals are so swept up with the skill or causes they need to generate income instead of actually making the money? The only way I can imagine these natives being filthy rich is if they pursue something they love and abides by their erratic values, otherwise they’ll see it as a chore and try to run away from it.

Saturn in the 2nd house

This placement reminds me of Ebeneezer Scrooge, you guys can be extremely wealthy yet very frugal, you can be respected for how you approach your possessions, always making sure they’re in fine quality for the cheapest price. You stretch your money, coupons, discounts, comparing quotes, getting home renovations but for the most price effective way, OR you can feel like you constantly don’t own enough and feel worthless without your assets, like a turtle without a shell, you can feel like a disgrace if you don’t have enough. People with this placement don’t like to spend too much at all unless there’s aspects and other planets in the 2nd house, this is because Saturn is where there is restriction. You can spend your life focusing on financial discipline. Saturn here can make you excellent planners when it comes to budgeting your finances. You don’t want to feel financially unstable and won’t let that happen under your watch.

Saturn is a strict teacher that teaches you discipline. Therefore you probably have had some unfortunate experiences when it comes to not only your assets, possessions and income but also your self worth. Your things could have been forcefully taken away, home auctioned, grown up poor/in debt, been hyper aware of your family’s finances or there’s just a constant fear that you will end up penniless if you don’t make every penny count. You will spend to exert your mandatory authority, for an example you may spend to bail a family member, spend to own company equity or stocks, pay for your business property mortgage, to pay employees, spending is a responsibility.

You’re always working for your income in one way or another. Which is exactly why you have the potential to earn a LOT. Saturn is also the area we master the most in our lifetime due to discipline, you’ll eventually rule authority and overcome your financial inconsistencies if you’re still struggling to be stable with your income, especially more so if you’re an Aquarius or Capricorn rising. It is often said that this happens by or during the age you’ll be when Saturn returns to the sign it was in when you were born. Aka. Saturn return. Also if you are a cap or Aquarius rising money is ALWAYS on your mind, it haunts you even, you may not purchase things because of your hyper awareness of its status symbolism, knowing it can make you appear less dignified.

The skills required for you to make income are being in charge, working on being the first or best in your field. Like Prince the musician, Zendaya, King Charles III, Snoop Dog. All of them hold a certain kind of authority and respect is held to their name because of the discipline shown in their lives that grants them income, if they don’t like how they’re being treated professionally they’ll let you know and not do business with you again. These natives work dutifully, to make more money it requires more authority, more responsibility, the more they take on in cutthroat environments the more they make income. Working under you is also borderline violation of human right act, you like to make your employees work like dogs 🥲, because that’s what you do to yourself.

You need to have dedication, put in the hard work, sacrifice the time, stand in authority, become the one that makes the decisions, stand up for yourself and better the systems put in place, your authority is a gift and the gateway to expanding your earnings and possessions. Your income is based from you delegating, planning, strategising. You are the patrons of charity, You can own heirlooms passed down to generations, own ‘old money’ aesthetic assets like historical buildings, classic cars, vintage furniture, blood money diamonds, established status symbols that most recognise as prestige, OR on the other end you can be extremely frugal, the cheapest car, cheapest most efficient home without having extra costs. It’s seriously a hit or miss with this placement because Saturn likes to restrict, but also likes to make you master so it’s a journey.

Of all the planets Saturn in the 2nd house is the best one at saving. Money and assets are saved in locked, bonded accounts, heavily restricted, guarded with lots of authorization needed for transactions. This is the person with biometric passwords and 3 safe words then a signature just to pay for sandwich bread. You guys NEED stability and your savings are heavy because you desperately feel you need to pinch onto every penny ‘just in case’. Where Jupiter feels entitled to income, possessions and assets, you on the other hand feel honoured. You spend because “I must” you earn because “It’s a necessity” there’s a level of stress that comes from managing your wealth. If saturn is alone here you guys can stay at the same company climbing up the ranks because you believe that income, wealth the material things are worth waiting for. You are dutiful to your job position and take work very seriously. It can feel frustrating because money can take a while to come in or it’s like you have to work harder than others to get what you want and when you see others do it, it’s irritating. But you must remember that you also have authority, you guys call the shots, that’s where your dedication and hard work takes you, although other people may take the easy route they never “master” like you do. Unlike them, you guys make the generational wealth, that’s why so many royals have this placement. Your income, your assets and possessions last a LONGGGGG time, passing onto generations, the kind of assets that allowed your great grandchildren to become millionaires, it reminds me of when Donald trump says “my father gave me a small loan of 1 million dollars” your assets are a foundation for exponential growth. When you invest in stocks gradually you really make it grow, if you own equity of companies that asset grows over time. You make the most once you commit to a financial plan like a business or investment and continually contribute to it year after year, you are sooo dedicated and uphold your duties without failure which is why you do it better than the other planets. This placement also makes you extremely wealthy once you retire, I know your retirement fund is beautiful.

When people see your possessions, your house, car or anything they can really respect you, it goes two ways. They can either think you worked very hard to get where you are and hold you in high regard or they can be impressed with how you’re able to restrain yourself from spending too much and appreciate your dedication to being a cheapskate.

Key Individuals with this placement:

Zendaya- owning classic vintage assets and multiple real estate, only affiliated with status symbols, the reason she makes so much money as an actress is because of how highly respected she is, she’s also is authoritative and fired her agent because they couldn’t assert themselves against racism in her career

Arnold Schwarzenegger- actor, billions businessman, former politician and body builder, he’s known for his incredible discipline that lead him to wealth, he was a millionaire before he was an actor because of his real estate investments, his hard work on himself such as body building helped his acting career(Saturn builds overtime), he has such an intricate well planned investment portfolio and he is known for his discipline/financial advice. And let’s be honest, who else would write a book called “Be Useful” other than a Saturn influenced individual?

King Charles 3rd- where do I start with this man. He’s literally known to be SUCH a stingy man. Whenever I think of the worst of this placement I think of him right here, he farms organically, skips lunch to save money, he is known as very hard working doing paperwork past midnight everyday, Saturn authority manifested as a literal king, his staff and advisors are held extremely accountable working strenuously. Just read about his day to day life and his financial dealings if you want to understand this placement properly

Roger Federer– Tennis legend with unparalleled discipline in his sport. Federer’s financial success comes from consistent hard work, endorsements, and investments. He also exemplifies Saturn’s respect for tradition and authority, being a revered figure both on and off the court.

Honorable mentions:Clint Eastwood, Jacqueline Kennedy, Friedrich Nietzsche, Kate Moss, Kendrick Lamar, François Fillon, Stephen King, Grimes, Roger Federer, Dominique Strauss-Kahn, Steven Spielberg, Prince Philip Mountbatten, Duke of Edinburgh, John Cena, Donald Glover, Diego Maradona, Richard Branson, Shaquille O’Neal, Rosé (K-pop), Jules Verne, George Lucas, Jane Austen, Los Angeles California, Saudi Arabia, Madrid Spain.

Notice how these individuals tend to establish themselves in fields that require immense patience and long-term dedication. Whether through meticulous planning, as seen with Roger Federer’s career longevity, or by creating something enduring, like George Lucas’s Star Wars legacy, these natives focus on building something that will outlast them. Many of them also seem to handle wealth as if it's more of a responsibility than a pleasure—often using their resources to invest in ventures, support others, or leave behind a legacy.

Interestingly, it’s common to see these individuals gaining respect for their resourcefulness and ability to work within constraints. Even when their industries were cutthroat, they approached challenges methodically, often turning setbacks into stepping stones. I can imagine these natives feeling a deep need to prove their worth through results, and their income seems to reflect the amount of structure and discipline they bring to their craft. They’re not the type to take shortcuts; instead, they value integrity and careful strategy, which is why their success often grows slowly but steadily.

You might also observe that these natives often tie their self-worth to their ability to maintain control over their financial or professional lives. I can imagine that they find financial freedom not through extravagance but through security and stability, knowing they’ve created a safety net for themselves and those they care about. Their wealth isn’t just a display of success; it’s a testament to their ability to master life’s challenges and leave something of value behind.

Venus in the 2nd house

Tell me you’re blessed without telling me you’re blessed. Venus is literally at home in this house. Not only do you guys have such a soothing voice you just ooze sensuality, hence why Elvis Presley, David Bekham, Paris Hilton have this placement. You just get princess treatment even if you’re a man. You spend on things that make you feel good, a beautiful home? A beautiful car? Beautiful jewellery? Beautiful watch? Beautiful wife 💀, no seriously this can at extremes be someone willing to pay for services, escorts or those rent-a-girlfriends, Anything that makes you not only look but FEEL beautiful. You spend because “I deserve it 👑”. It reminds me of those sprinkle sprinkle girls on TikTok and men who like to be praised. If it’s in Leo, my goodness it’s even worse haha. You guys deserve it all, think of Sharpay Evan in high school musical. You’re the IT guy/girl in your social class, you can get a lot of compliments on your possessions because you have really good taste that’s appreciated by everyone, you’re the person in class who everyone at school is raving about their Louis Vuitton limited edition exclusive bag, it’s more so conventional beauty even if it’s in Aquarius -assets are recognisable for its beauty, also you guys have the best smell, if you wear fragrances people may compliment your scent or want to know what you’re wearing, this placement along with Jupiter 2H reminds me of those overconsumption influencer pages because they’re always so blessed with the nicest stuff. Except unlike Jupiter you guys own stuff to fulfill you, not just to keep around for exploration. If Venus is here alone you can spend on things like Birkin bags, private jets, first class, fancy cuisine, designer possessions, luxury houses, luxury cars, you can be bratty about your money and self entitled (as you should because let’s be honest, who doesn’t want what you have?). It screams spoiled.

You can earn your income from things regarding satisfaction, beauty, pleasure and fairness, it honestly depends on the sign. Like if it’s in Libra you may be a diplomat, lawyer, fashion designer -be very pleasing visually and socially, in Taurus could be a singer, food taster, chef, Leo- a model, hair stylist, in Cancer can be interior designer, architect housewife, caregiver, etc. it could be anything to be honest you can still work in any industry of course but the second house shows you the skills needed for you to make your income and with Venus here it’s very much related with pleasure, beauty and fairness, you may be giving it to others or indulging in it yourself as a job. As you can see it’s so varied that this can literally range from a sex worker to a world peace diplomat, so don’t try to pin it down too much, you’d need to look at the rest of your chart. 

Regardless of what it is you do, you need to feel good at work, you can be someone who always looks good at work because it affects your income, you make spending an earning a “leisure” or a “treatment” it’s like going to the spa, like a satisfied “ahh” when you’ve finished your job, you actually love what you have to do for your job because it makes you feel good about yourself and heightens your self esteem. You can get praised a lot at work for your skills and be blessed without working as hard as your peers. Can be favoured by your company, least likely to become redundant, personality hire, nepotism, or just straight up a delight to work with. This placement also reminds me of Adrien Agreste from miraculous ladybug, you guys just have it good, it’s like the table is prepared for you at your beck and call, unfortunately though it can also suggest that the way you were given love growing up was through financial compensation OR you weren’t given that much which made you feel like you needed material gifts and wealth to feel “worth it”. You feel great about yourself but when you aren’t being given compliments or gifts for what you do or the way you are it’s like you don’t even matter, you can feel like nobody cares about you. This reminds me of those artists on TikTok or instagram that post their drawings online and get no followers, likes or comments so they stop posting, or influencers when they get cancelled feel like their whole fandom hates them so they quit. In return this can also end up making you have people pleasing tendencies, not always to your detriment it can just be small things like  buying doughnuts for the team at work because you know they’d like it and you actually want to, while it also makes you look good. 

You own beautiful possessions, I always think of Marilyn Monroes outfits, image and jewellery as the Venus 2nd house affect (she doesn’t have this placement but you guys have that wow factor in your possessions). People think you’re spoilt or you spoil yourself because of your possessions, you get a lot of bonuses because Venus is a gift, you can receive praise bonuses at work like “most sales” or “best customer service” bonus. You own the Pinterest board houses, the pretty cars, the house your Venus ruler is in will also show you further depth as to where you get your income, skills, possessions and gains from. Like if it were in 7th house it might be your partners- business or romantic, if 3rd house can be siblings and friends, 11h can be scholarships, community, sponsorship groups, go fund me etc. 

It also indicates your love language is gifts as Venus shows how we receive beauty, luxury, pleasure etc. even though 8th house shows your gains, Venus here also makes you get a lot except instead of it being shared with you, it is owned by you. Like someone purchasing a home in your name, a trust fund etc. 

You can have a good amount of savings, or not have to worry about it because someone else is saving in your name. It reminds me of Gabrielle Solis, a character from desperate housewives tv series who’s husband refuses to give her his credit card as a punishment, therefore other men end up paying for Gabrielle’s expenses like her shoes, fine dining etc. she says “I’m a pretty girl, and pretty girls are never lonely”. What Im trying to say is that even if you get broke somehow you always have someone or something at the right time might swoop in and pay for your stuff, can be a family member, friend, work bonus, just depends on the sign. Although this isn’t the 8th house, people can pay for your stuff because Venus represents receiving and love being expressed. You can end up not having that much savings because you’re always spending it, but because Venus is here and it shows how we store money; you can store yours in prestigious banks that are known for luxury and added benefits, trust funds or even as a child you could have had the most prettiest piggy bank that made saving an indulgent pleasure. Earning, Spending and Saving money can feel good for you because it’s adding to your security that you so deeply value. Also your weddings are bomb as hell, beautiful I must say especially if your Venus is in cancer here. You guys have the “crazy rich Asian” kind of weddings. 

To maximize your income and earn more, I’d say you should act entitled to the best, knowing that you deserve it all. Your self worth isn’t dependent on receiving but know that you receive because you have self worth. You need to look good, feel good and enjoy leisure, give satisfaction. That’s how you can make more income and own more assets. It can range from lip service to clearing up the air in a diplomatic manner at work

[but-the-library-of-alexandria]

I love drinking my Kryn Matriarchy Juice and not just because I'm obsessed with both drow as a race and gender in fantasy cultures in general, but also because it makes essek like. the elle woods of the dynasty.

not that essek is particularly masculine on the face of it lol but I do think it's interesting he's one of the only drow we meet who has very short hair. which might just be because elves and long hair traditionally go hand in hand in fantasy, but it could also be an example of kryn fashion leaning feminine by default, especially the kind of formal fashion worn by people in politics who want to be taken seriously. and we know that essek is the rebellious progressive youngster of the court, so it makes sense that the non-conformative hairstyle is a subtle little rebellion against social norms

we kind of take for granted that essek dresses and presents himself the way he does - the mantle that broadens his shoulders, the cloak that makes him look big and boxy, floating to make himself taller - to look intimidating and powerful, but we're coming at that from a pov where masculine = powerful. in a world where femininity is the default and superior gender - where the queen and most of her high-ranking officials are and always have been women - why would that be the case?

anyway this is all to say that essek coming to court for the first time with his short hair and shoulder pads and plain black oversized cloak looked like this to the other drow:

[tobiasdrake]

I'm rewatching Legally Blonde and I feel like you couldn't make this movie today only because modern writers would want to qualify Elle's intelligence.

Like. The first twenty minutes leading up to her acceptance to Harvard are packed with establishing character pieces highlighting her intelligence.

We open on her savagely tearing apart a sales worker that was trying to trick her into an upsell. And once they start talking about her academics?

I mean. Yeah.

She's been maintaining a 4.0 GPA and manages to study hard enough to get a 179 (out of 180) on her LSAT while also managing the responsibilities of being sorority president? Yeah. Yeah, that's really fucking impressive. Elle Woods is a goddamn mega-genius.

It's just that her mega-genius is presented comically because of how hyperfeminine and Rich White Girl she is. She's coded bimbo to disguise how mega-smart she actually is. Which is. Y'know.

Kind of.

What the entire movie is about. The preconceptions and harsh judgment of women who are considered too girly. Elle doesn't have to change herself and become smart in order to succeed. Elle's fine, actually; If you thought she wasn't, you're just wrong.

She's not a static character; She does have her own growing and developing to do. It just. Isn't related to her intelligence and capacity for understanding even the complex subject of case law. She was already brilliant from the word go.

When she gets into Harvard, despite her comically unconventional admissions essay, it's treated as a relatively ordinary admission. It's not like they're running some kind of special program or something for less qualified candidates that she only finds out about halfway through the film and then has to resolve to prove that she can do it anyway.

(In fact, that's how Warner got in. The big reveal is that he's an unqualified dipshit whose family bribed his way in.)

There's not, like... one guy who's willing to take a risky chance on her and everyone else is just like, "Okay, but she's worthless and when this blows up in your face, it'll be your career on the line." There's a little bit of discussion and then a rubber stamping.

Elle gets into Harvard because... the board looks over her credentials and goes, "Yeah. That is a Harvard-worthy admission. Stamp it." And that's it.

She gets in because she's smart and she puts in the work. That's it. That is all there is to the secret of Elle Woods's success. She's smart. She puts in the work. She succeeds.

I just. I really like that for her. And I'm not sure how many writers today would be willing to let her have that.

[punksocks]

Please pick the picture that resonates with you, that gives you sort of that subconscious pull. The picture with the most weight behind it.

This didn’t quite turn out how I expected but I do like the results ! Everything may not resonate perfectly because they’re general readings, but please comment which pile resonates with you the most, and your thoughts after your reading <3

Why do people stare at you?

*****

-Pile 1: People stare at you because you have this air of authority. You may have been through a lot of heavy life experiences, a lot of tragedy and betrayal from those you’re closest to. (I had a hard time writing out the words for this one- some of your may still really struggle with the weight of what you’ve endured.) But you’ve made a lot of progress in overcoming this. You’ll get your just deserts and you’ll never have to look back at this betrayal again. You know how to build a way out for yourself and that empresses a lot people and gives you a naturally regal air (I misspelled this in my notes too lol, confirmation). You still manage to be kind and generous despite your wounds from what you’ve endured. If you have the mean, financial or otherwise, you use them to be a good person. You’re at the end of a cycle of suffering and people find your strength poetic. You’ve gotten through so much so successfully, it leaves people enamored and they want to honor how you’ve done it (ok I was going to write hear over honor but it felt too important to correct, this confirms how you’re coming out of this on top). You work so hard, endlessly, people are in awe of your stamina and want to know what you’re doing next. You’re a very passionate person, people love your ambitions and how you always have energy to create and expand and work (Do you have fire signs in your big 6? Especially Aries?). You’re the life of the party ! You may be a heartbreaker as well. People want to work with you to see what you know (Possible Capricorn energy, especially Ascendant). People don’t think they’ll measure up to your -steep- standards, but they love to shoot their shot anyway (my notes say to be your lover, but I can’t type that outright lol). You have boss babe energy and people want a shot at proving themselves to you (proving that they can keep up with you, even when they /know/ they can’t). They get scared at the possibility of fumbling you (bruh the way I sucked my teeth on accident, this doesn’t impress you lol). They think their worlds will fall apart if they have you and screw it up (Scorpio/Pluto placement vibes?) People see you as rich, wealthy, abundant (financially, rich in resources, energy even, any of that). They see you as very ambitious and they wonder if they can keep up without falling behind or getting jealous. People dispare over the thought of keeping up with you because they know they can’t match you (*despair, but this may indicate experiencing ghosting for some of you. Also emphasis on Aries energy again). You do all of this while prioritizing your self care and happiness. Good for you Pile 1! Don’t slow down or neglect yourself on behalf of anyone. Someone that knows how to match you will come into your life if they haven’t already. Ancestors/ guides/ however you prefer to refer to them as say they’re proud of you but you’ve got to release all of those people that want you to slow down for them— they’re dead weight (damn, stone cold, as you should be).

Songs:

******

-Pile 2: people stare at you because you’re super major! My brain went to a valley girl accent so people may regularly under estimate you pile 2 (major Elle Woods from Legally Blonde vibes). They may assume you’re a bit vapid or superficial but you contain multitudes and you have some seriously strong boundaries. The Emperor came out from 2 different decks! You’re often the smartest person in the room, and you really don’t care about your haters, you couldn’t care less about them because you know they’re below you. (Impressive, a lot of people have to work on healthily embracing their ego, you’re balanced in this and that’s commendable.) People stare at your naturally regal presence ‘I look expensive’ I’d what I just heard. You are really luxurious (in small and big ways - luxury can also mean never treating yourself less than you deserve.) People may try to steal attention from you but you know they’re grasping at straws. You don’t let them phase you. Like grounded Libra energy. You may be a bit older, some of you have Libra conjunct outer planets. Like Pluto, so there’s a lot of depth to your grace and charm. At the beginning (of the reading) the original Venus song, from the 60s, played. You may also be drawn to a vintage/classic style and this adds to your charm. The fact that you know when to pause and rest helps make you so unstoppable. You’re a very balanced person, strong Libra energy. You channel being balanced into making things happen (‘making money moves’). I thought of my Grandma (my favorite Libra tbh) very demure, classical lady, but she could move mountains when she set her mind to it. You have a razor sharp intuition too, you always know ‘when to hold ‘em and when to fold em’ (do some of you like country music? Lol) You know how to get your wishes fulfilled. You may be older (gen X) or you just have really mature vibes for your age. You’ve probably transformed a lot to get to this point in your life as well. I’m happy for you and your guides are proud of how far you’ve come (and how far you’ll go)

Cosmia by Joanna Newsom

******

-Pile 3: Hello my pile 3’s, your guides had a lot they wanted to say to you and I had to switch pens bc my first one ran out. I get the feeling that you rushed into a new opportunity lately. A situation that you thought you wished for but it broke your heart. Could be a relationship or a job, something that you hoped would solve your woes but brought you more head and heart ache than you expected. This was a challenging period but people are staring because they can see hope and optimism coming back to you. ‘The sun will shine on another day’ I heard. (Either you’re realizing this or your guides need you to know this truth.) The Sun, The Star, and the Ace of Swords all came out so you’re really being called to stay optimistic because things will get better is what I’m getting. You’re gaining more abundance after a hard period and you’ve been weighed down by a lot of burdens (too many !). But this cycle is ending and is calling on you to listen to the knowledge you already know. You’re growing into your emotional understanding and overall this pushed growth is for the best. You’re learning you’re your own expert guide. You know what you want and need the best out of everyone. People can tell you’re changing and you’re not who you used to be.

[dance-in-the-morning-glow]

Sniffing the Caribbean: Elle’s Pirates Perfume List (2025)

Some of you might remember my post from last year. Since then, I’ve sampled more, obsessed further, and come to the conclusion that this list needed an update. Because this is what I do for fun, apparently.

This is all vibes-based and deeply unserious (except when it’s not), but it’s also the hill I will die on.

Elizabeth Swann: Okay, so the scents I've picked for her back then still fit well imo. Just switching them up into chronological order. She evolves so much over the trilogy, she deserves a scent arc.

For CotBP-Elizabeth, I’d suggest Cloon Keen’s Lá Bealtaine (Bergamot, Mandarin, Neroli, Pink Pepper, Angelica Seed, Angelica Root, Jasmine, Rose, Tuberose, Cedarwood, Patchouli, Amber, Musk, Cashmeran). Has the energy of someone dreaming about freedom but also knowing how to curtsy perfectly.

Then there's Juliette Has A Gun - Vanilla Vibes (Sea salt, natural vanilla absolute, orchid absolute, absolute brown musk, bezoin absolute, sandalwood, tonka bean). It's is a radiant, salty vanilla that smells like sun on your skin and a breeze in your hair. It's the girl on the brink of transformation.

If you want a more indie-leaning take: Death & Floral’s I could never stay long enough on the shore (sand, salty air, smoke, cold coastline). This one’s not as polished, and that’s kind of the point. It smells like she’s already got one foot in another world. (I think they're on hiatus rn, but you could always check r/IMAM's sunday swaps or r/IndieExchange on Reddit or something. Same goes for basically any other indie scent.)

DMC/AWE/Pirate King Elizabeth, however? She’d absolutely slay in something sharp, resinous, and dramatic. Enter: Beaufort’s Terror & Magnificence (birch tar, black pepper, saffron, incense, tobacco, papyrus, haitian vetiver, myrrh, labdanum, benzoin and pebbles). She’s weathered and commanding. Elizabeth in full Pirate King regalia would devour this.

Will Turner: Black Phoenix Alchemy Lab - Asleep in the Deep (black plum, sea salt, opium tar accord, labdanum, and indigo benzoin)

Dense and dreamlike, pairs perfectly with Elizabeth’s Vanilla Vibes like shadow to her light. Feels almost like a premonition. The Dutchman waits.

Jack Sparrow: Give him anything rum-drenched and slightly unhinged. But if I had to name a signature scent, I’d pick Stranger Perfumery’s Cigar Rum (raisin, dried fruits (prune and cherry), rum absolute, mandarin, amber, tobacco, oakwood, vetiver, resins, labdanum absolute, seaweed absolute).

You could absolutely layer that with a dirt single note or Fantôme - Bune (damp subterranean air, nagarmotha, smooth cave walls, davana, a cold marble altar, & glittering green dragon scales) for authenticity lol.

Hector Barbossa: Still convinced the core vibe here is woody.

Solstice Scents - Headmaster (Apple, bourbon, oak, cedar, pipe tobacco, applewood, amber, spices) goes hard . That apple note layered over wood and spice? Perfect. Can't get more Barbossa than that.

But if you want something a bit uncanny: Whispered Myths (natural cambodian oud, cantaloupe, cedarwood, musk, honey, salvaged shipwreck) by Imaginary Authors. Yes, it has cantaloupe. No, I can’t explain why that works. This perfume smells like a half-forgotten treasure ship rotting sweetly in the sun, and Barbossa would 100% bottle that.

James Norrington: James, especially in his earlier form and later in AWE, is all restraint and clean lines. Thus, any light aquatic or clean scents work, so I’d choose something like Solstice Scent’s Gulf Breeze (Saltwater, sand, seashells, sea oats, rain, ambergris (vegan accord). A light marine scent with a wistful edge. This is a man who looks at the horizon (very sadly) and thinks of everything he can't say.

Maison Margiela's Sailing Day (aquatic, aldehydes, juniper, coriander, iris absolute, rose, red seaweed, ambergris, ambery wood) fits the bill too. A bit more straightforward than some of the others, but it's got that fresh-sea-air vibe.

If we’re talking clean scents, my personal fave is Ghost in the Shell (Yuzu, clean aldehydes, jasmine, musk, vinyl, ambergris) by Etat Libre d'Orange, so I'm just throwing that in here for good measure. Because this smells like sterile beauty and cool detachment. You get it.

For his Scruffington era, you could just let yourself inspire by the scents I've listed for Jack. (Make of that statement what you will.)

Cutler Beckett: *rubs hands together* Oh yes. My favorite little tyrant. Let’s talk.

So 1740 (bergamot, mugwort, patchouli, coriander, cardamom, cedar, birch, labdanum, leather, vanilla, elemi, helichrysum) by Histoires de Parfums is still my absolute holy grail of a Beckett scent. This smells like calculated charm, and a man who will smile while ruining you.

But wait - there's more.

I recently discovered Arquiste – Venice Rococo (black violet, blush rose, chamomile, dusty iris, subtle animalic amber) and that’s what a powdered wig should smell like. I'd say, layer it with anything I've listed here and you've got the perfect Beckett combo, but to me, that shit's so overpowering, so layering isn't really an option.

There's also Powdered Peruke (vintage powder, white rose, iris petals, musk (vegan), creamy vanilla, ambrette, hay, light woods, cashmere) by Dark Tales (and I honestly don't know what to think about the fact that I own not one. but TWO samples that make you smell like a fuckass wig. Call me crazy, idc). Anyway, this is the softer option, less “aggressive puff in the face,” more low-key elegance. And I guess the woody notes make it creamier which is nice.

Also, adding Commodity's Velvet (coconut water, roasted almonds, rose petals, vanilla, amber, and smoky musk) because it feels right. Imagine sipping brandy in your study while planning how to take over the seas. You get the vibe.

In my old post, I mentioned Gris Charnel for the tea angle, but honestly, after trying Indigo Smoke (lapsang souchong tea, mandarin orange, apricot, guaiac wood, incense and pine tar) by Arquiste I'm thinking this fits better. Not super deep into tea scents, but this one has the right smoky bitterness.

(Sorry, I'm making rocket science out of this for my blorbo from hell™️ - I'll stop here. Most of y’all probably don’t want to hear me go full scent autopsy on that cringefail man. Which I get. He's terrible.)

Davy Jones: Yeah, you still can't tell me this man - cursed squid creature - doesn't smell like Squid by Zoologist (Pink Pepper, Solar Salicylate, Incense, Black Ink Accord, Salty Accord, Opoponax, Ambergris, Benzoin, Musk). It's too on the nose.

BUT if you want something more tame (or like, a little less Zoologist), I gotchu. With the fishes and the dead by Death & Floral (Black squid ink and mile long oceans. Black ambergris, black labdanum absolute, salty ocean water, and black pits of stretched out emptiness) smells a bit similar imo, but it's less musky and I love the labdanum note in there. Plus, it's saltier. It's giving Davy Jones dramatically playing his organ in the best way.

Tia Dalma/Calypso: Still hunting for the perfect scent for her, especially in goddess form. But for human-form Tia Snake Oil (deep, rich, earthy notes swirled with vegetal musks, sugared vanilla bean, and dark spices) by Black Phoenix Alchemy Lab fits?? Mysterious and dangerous without trying. She is the secret everyone pretends not to believe in.

Ian Mercer: Beaufort - Tonnerre (smoke, gunpowder, blood, brandy, sea spray and citrus)

Still don't think I need to elaborate. This is a violent scent. It opens with an explosion and never settles down.

Bonus Round: Fragrances That Just Fit the Vibe

Two cups of tea, a summer monsoon, me and you (Rain on cracked soil, wet creosote, a swelling monsoon, desert cedar, black tea) by Death + Floral. I weirdly associate this with the beginning of DMC. It smells like heartbreak in a storm, waiting at the altar while the sky falls.

Triton (Murky sea water, ambergris, ancient forest mosses, crushed ivy leaves, frankincense, resins, ozone, with a hint of citrus) by Fantôme for the maelstrom vibes.

Sydney Rock Pool (Australian sandalwood, coconut skin accord, driftwood note, frangipani, seaweed, ambermax and sea salt) by Arquiste has me thinking of Will and Elizabeth's little beach moment at the end of AWE.

Black Pearl by Dark Tales (milky coconut, sea air, sweet rum, tropical dried fruits, worn leather, sandalwood, black woods, cedarwood). I mean. It’s called Black Pearl. What more could you want.

Solstice Scents' Sea of Gray (Vanilla rain, saltwater, seaweed, ambergris (vegan), white amber, roasted seashells, white sandalwood, frangipani) is my all-time fave salty vanilla. Basically evokes the smell of a stormy sea.

Also, BPAL has a whole ass pirate themed collection called Fire Down Below. You might want to check that out.

That’s all (for now). Lmk if you’ve got additions or would like to hear my thoughts on characters that aren’t mentioned here!!

[darcydekarios]

BG3 POST CANON TAG GAME

Thank you so much for the tag, @optimisticgrey ❤️ I’m excited to answer these questions about Darcy

Also, I’ll tag (no pressure): @senualothbrok, @astarioffsimpmain, @tociminna, @avabjorna36, @thelittlesorceressbg3, @emmy-dekarios-bg3, @swordsbardkat and anyone else who wants to join!

(Screenshot by @swordsbardkat)

First of all, who is your char? Are they Tav or Durge? How did the whole adventure changed them?

Darcy is a Tav! She was raised with a circle of Druids when her parents fled to be together. Her mother was human (noble wizard), and her father an elf (wood elf sorcerer). Her and her little sister Maisie were 10 and 5 when they lost their parents. They went to live the noble life with their grandparents until Darcy was age 18. She then left to go on her own adventure of looking for her parents (were they actually gone or not? This is her current TT adventure) and living among Druids until she was snatched by the natuloid 10 years later.

Darcy was always kind and always defended those she loved. When the adventure first began, she found herself scared to get too close to anyone in fear she would lose them like she had her parents. She became close to every single one of them, however, and would defend any of them with her life.

How were companions' quests completed? Did any of companions died?

All companions had a good ending!

Gale gave up the crown to Mystra and became a professor at Blackstaff Academy, Astarion stayed a spawn, seeking out a cure for him to walk in the sunlight again. Also, fun fact: He ends up meeting Darcy’s sister Maisie and the two get married and she uses a wish spell for him to walk in the sunlight again ❤️, Lae’zel joined forces to defeat Valakith in the astral plane, Wyll became the blade of Avernus, going with Karlach to find a cure for her heart. Her and Wyll find a cure and they are back home safe and sound! Shadowheart became a Selunite and ends up meeting Darcy and Maisie’s brother Oliver 🥰. Jaheira stays in Baldur’s Gate, but visits Darcy in Waterdeep often as she essentially adopts Darcy and Maisie as her own daughters and even walked Darcy down the aisle for her and Gale’s wedding. Halsin takes care of the orphans and of course the Owlbear cub 🤭 I haven’t figured out Minthara’s after game life just yet, but I know it will be a good one ❤️

Who did they romance? Where do they and their LI live after game?

As evidence by her last name, Darcy fell head over heels for the wizard, although she was hesitant at first to fall in love, but Gale completely swept her off her feet. They live happily in Waterdeep with him being a professor of magic at Blackstaff and Darcy being a Druidic healer and opening one of the first hospitals in Waterdeep with her fellow Druids. (Yes I fudged lore just a little with that one 😅)

Do they have children or decided to be without them?

They actually do have two children! Their daughter Elanor (they call her Elle for short) is currently 4 years old and already starting to learn magic as she will be a wizard like her father. She even summoned her own tressym after they broke the news that she would have a little sibling (she wanted a kitten, not a little brother). Their son Taron was just born, but he will be a Druid like his mother 🥰

So, about Baldur's Gate! How is it going? Who is in a council? Who (from npcs we met in game) live there?

I actually haven’t thought much about this one. I know Baldur’s Gate is currently being rebuilt from the cult and they do visit from time to time. Most of their companions, however, came to live with them in Waterdeep.

Does your char and companions continue to connect after game or they prefer to not see each other?

Oh no, they are very much involved! As mentioned earlier, Jaheira is an honorary mother to Darcy and grandmother to her two little ones. Also as mentioned before, Astarion married Darcy’s younger sister Maisie (yes he and Gale are BIL’s 😂), and Shadowheart ended up falling in love with Darcy and Maisie’s older brother Oliver. (Darcy and Maisie find out about him later on in the story as he was taken from their mother at birth). Karlach and SH pretty much make themselves at home in Darcy and Gale’s tower, always coming over unannounced (Karlach is a sucker for Gale’s cooking). They also meet up with all the other companions from time to time! Halsin even made a wooden cradle for their baby with ducks carved into it 🥰

Did they find any friends among npcs?

I really should start writing more on this one! But for sure Alfira, Rolan, Dammon, and Barcus remain in touch with them as they all attended her and Gale’s wedding!

Free question! Any specific headcanons?

Too many to name (I really need to post all my writing on here). Besides Darcy’s siblings marrying two of the companions, I always HC that Gale takes Darcy to the beach in Waterdeep often because it’s where she is the happiest 🥹

[literallypyro]

Congrats for finding the courage and motivation to start writing! Is good to find new content with our pookies (especially pyro❤️‍🔥).

Can i request some headcanons on what are the mercs (if not all, you can do just pyro) looking for in a partner and how would they aproach their lil crush?

Thank you and i hope you have fun with this project! ❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥

This one is definitely a thinker! I chose to do the offense classes since that includes Pyro!

And of course, I hope you like it!

The Perfect Pair

Scout:

Canonically, he is interested in people like Miss Pauling, and honestly, respect. Though, I don't think it's very strict. I think he is definitely attracted to intelligent and capable people.

However, that can look very different from person to person. Although he's attracted to intelligence in general, there's definitely bonus points if it's a resourceful kind. Quick-witted. I could even see him finding sass more attractive when it's coming from a "nerdy" person.

Maybe it's because someone quick with their mind compliments him well as someone quick on his feet. Both are adaptable in very different ways.

I could also see him being attracted to someone like Elle Woods from Legally Blonde. I KNOW, I KNOW, it's kinda giving into the whole bimbo x jock cliche, but HEAR ME OUT.

You cannot deny that she is smart as a whip. I know she was mainly accepted into Harvard because of her appearance, but they wouldn't have been able to do that if she didn't have the scores.

Booksmart, even if a little socially oblivious and not exactly understanding cues, AND a sense of style? Not to mention the attitude applied with perfect force at the perfect time with the perfect delivery? Honey, this man is wrapped around your finger.

Soldier:

If you've read the comics, we already know his main type. Someone who can match him perfectly in combat, thought process, and insanity. I feel like I need to add some clarification and details, though.

It's not just that they're similar. It's that they understand him. When nobody else in the world understands him, his partner will. He knows he's not the sharpest tool in the shed, and he'd be happiest with someone who wouldn't make him feel bad for it, even if it's unintentional.

What he lacks in intelligence, he makes up for in passion, and he would want someone who could match him on that as well. While he leans towards the louder types, he wouldn't be upset if his partner had a quieter kind of passion. The kind of passion that looks more like humble determination.

I think he would also be attracted to someone who he thinks would be a good parent. By his standards, anyway. That being said, he thinks good parents prioritize not dying, fun, and fair discipline. In that order. However, it would be a bit of a turn off if they were the overprotective type. Those kids will not learn if they do not get injured! Pain is sometimes the best teacher! He would never intentionally inflict pain on his children, but if they bring it on themselves, then they bring it on themselves. They were the ones who didn't listen to the first warning.

Pyro:

Not gonna lie, I was a little stumped on this one.

I think they would be attracted to someone who treats them like an equal and not a child. Someone who understands that they're not some dumb maniac with an affinity for arson. That's really their only non-negotiable. Several bonus points if their partner stands up for them when someone else treats them like a child.

Other than that, I think they would prefer creative types. They don't want someone to balance them out. Like Soldier, they would probably want someone similar to them, but they're way less strict about it. They're the type to want to be able to be best friends with their partner. That being said, I think Pyro is demiromantic, and possibly asexual.

If their partner is an artist, they would love to have time set aside where they listen to music and draw each other.

If their partner is a writer, they would love someone who makes stories for the cute little drawings they make.

They would probably be really into bakers, now that I think about it. They would love helping in the kitchen, and their favorite part is licking the bowl/spoon when sweets are being made.

They wouldn't care at all about book smarts, but emotional intelligence is a must.

If anyone wants me to do the other class groups, don't be afraid to ask!

[livlaughloveluke]

𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐠𝐚𝐫𝐞𝐭- 𝐞.𝐥

𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: ever since that night on the rooftop, you’ve known

𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: a little cursing, brief mention of past toxic relationship, ethan being an absolute sweetheart

𝐚/𝐧- clearing out my drafts rn so im kinda posting a lot! this ones kinda short and sweet, but i think its cute 💗 also, you might want to listen to margaret by lana del rey, it will help this make sense 😭

margaret (feat. bleachers) by lana del rey

02:45 ━━━━●───── 05:40 ⇆ㅤ ㅤ◁ㅤ ❚❚ ㅤ▷ ㅤㅤ↻

ethan’s heart sunk at the sight of someone on the roof, where he normally he spent his sleepless nights, thinking alone. he cautiously approached the mysterious figure, only to find out that it was a women who looked to be around his age, dressed in a lengthy white dress, with gorgeous shimmery pearls hanging loosely around your neck. 

there was something enchanting about this moonlight. you looked incredible, despite your glossy eyes and runny mascara, which had given away the fact that you had been crying. 

“you okay?” ethan muttered, unsure of what to do or say to the dazzling young girl. you jump, startled by the presence of another person. you wipe away what was left of your mascara, trying to clean up a little.

“yeah..? yeah.” you said, the first word sounding like you were trying to convince yourself, while the second ‘yeah’ sounding more persuasive and firm.

 “wanna talk about it?” the brown eyed boy suggested, unsure where he got his confidence from. something about the stranger on the rooftop made him want to learn more. 

“well, my boyfriend just broke up with me on our 6 month anniversary. he said he was taking me out to celebrate, but ended up dumping me while we were eating, elle woods style.” you shared. 

“he sounds like a real asshole. maybe it was for the best.” ethan stated. 

“i think you’re right. he was kind of an asshole.” the girl giggled in response. 

ethan grinned, taking in her beauty as they stared at each other. 

“well, i shared my story, now what about you? why are you here tonight? your girlfriend dump you?” you jokes, although you remained curious to what he reply was.

“uhm- no, no girlfriend. i like to come out here when i cant sleep. it helps me think.” he answers, taking a deep breath of the crisp, chilly air. he approached the ledge, and sat down, legs hanging off the building. it was scary the first few times, but recently he came to enjoy it. there was something so freeing about the risks of being this high up.

you mirror his actions and sit next to him. you look at the breathtaking view, before realizing there was a much better view right beside you.

you face him to ask a question. 

“how do you know?” 

ethan tilted his head in confusion, your question was to vague for him to answer. you continue talking, giving more context.

“what if he was the love of my life? how do i know?” this time, ethan can answer your question easily.

“that’s your answer, the answer is no. if you have to ask, then he wasn’t your true love. when you know, you’ll know.” 

you just hummed in response. 

“we never properly introduced ourselves. I don’t even know your name.” you inform him.

“we don’t even know each others names, and yet i still feel closer to you than anyone else in my life.” he added, letting out a dry chuckle, trying to hide how pathetic that was.

“i feel the same. you probably know more about my feelings than any of my friends, and we’ve known each other for what, five minutes?” you added. he was relieved that you shared the same emotions as him. 

you stuck out your hand. “my name is y/n.”

ethan got the memo and reached to shake your hand. the contact made butterflies fill his stomach. “my name is ethan.” he replied.

“ethan? i would have never guessed that was your name. don’t get me wrong, i think its lovely, but you look more like a conner to me.” 

ethan laughed at your comment, and swiftly formed a response. “conner? really? i think i look more like an axel.” 

“i could see that i guess, but all i can think about when i hear the name axel is this kid who bullied me in second grade.” you giggle.

“you were bullied by a kid named axel?” he teases. 

“yes!! and every day he would tell the teacher on me for something I didn’t even do!! and worse, the teacher believed him!” you were now full blown laughing, along with ethan who was starting to really enjoy talking to you.

you and him continued chatting a little longer, asking basic questions, but you wanted more. you wanted to know the real ethan.

“im tired of all these simple questions. lets go more in depth. for starters, if you only had one day left to live, would you tell anyone? why or why not?” you ask him. 

“woah. to be honest, i don’t think i would tell anyone until the end of the day, you know? why ruin your last day alive by being constantly pitied, if you could spend it happily with the people you love most?” he announced, and you nodded your head in agreement.

“now i ask you something. if were getting murdered, and got to choose the way you were killed, what would you pick?”

“wow, that took a turn. i would probably choose to get poisoned. its not painful really, and its pretty quick. just don’t poison me with bleach. i hate the smell of it.” you declared. 

this caused you both to start laughing again, to the point where your stomach hurt. after your giggle fest, your exhaustion got the best of you, and you yawned, sleepily. your actions did not go unnoticed by ethan, and he decided to call it a night. he helped walk you home, making sure to keep you safe. 

you talked the whole way home, mainly about your music taste. he was into the alternative indie kinda music, and you bonded over a few artists. then, you reached your dorm. you exchanged numbers, none of you wanting this relationship to end.

for the next week, you texted each other constantly, giving song recommendations, and just learning about one another in general. you figured out you both went to blackmore university, and took a few of the same classes. you were surprised you hadn’t seen him before, but then again, two weeks ago you weren’t looking. 

you were supposed to meet him on the rooftop again tonight. this time however, you wouldn’t be caught sulking in a dress. you changed into a more comfortable, yet gorgeous look.

eleven pm rolled around, and you headed up to the roof. ethan was already waiting for you, a bouquet of tulips in his hands. he handed them to you, and you couldn’t hold your smile back. 

“how’d you know these were my favorite?!” you  questioned him. 

“you’re mentioned it a couple times. i researched the meaning, and it turns out they symbolize growth and new beginnings, which i thought was perfect, because of your recent relationship ending and uh i-“ 

you cut him off with a hug, holding the flowers off to the side, not wanting to crush them. you pull apart so you could face him when talking. 

“they’re beautiful, eth. I can’t believe you put so much effort into them.” you informed him.

your ex boyfriend was a total dickhead, who never really cared. you weren’t sure if he even got you flowers once in your relationship. it was new having someone that cared, and the feeling of being truly loved was definitely not unwelcome. 

you both sat on the edge and started babbling like last time. 

“you know who i’d think you’d like? faye webster. she’s really good, and while she’s well known, she’s definitely underrated.” you blurt out. 

“I’ll listen to her tonight. whats your spotify?” he asks. you share your account and both follow eachother. he starts scrolling through your playlists and reviewing them. 

“taylor swift? really, y/n? i thought you were better than this.” he sarcastically says. you act offended, before retorting back. 

“taylor swift is so good! she’s popular for a reason. maybe you just haven’t heard the right album. i feel like you would like evermore or folklore.” he shakes his head, disapprovingly. he claimed he would never listen to one of her songs. (he spent 2 hours that night listening to the albums you suggested)

eventually, it got late and he started walking you home. out of the blue, he asked you an important question. 

“would you maybe want to go out with me one night? officially?” he managed to stutter out. 

“i’d love to, eth.” you respond. 

you had never really been completely sure of something, but that night you knew one thing. you were in love with ethan landry.

[girlbloggercher]

how to be like elle woods

elle woods is truly a role model. a fictional one, of course, but still a role model. especially for young girls who have been told that they can't put effort into their appearance and grades at the same time.

1. have a motive

if i remember correctly, elle's initial motivation was to get warner back, although she did end up having a genuine passion for her studies. your motive doesn't need to be getting back with your crappy ex, but having a motive will help. regardless of what it is.

2. be yourself

don't think that just because you go to a prestigious school, or something like that, that you have to dress in neutral colors, or have a calm personality. now, if that's what you want, then okay. but if it's not, then be yourself. being smart doesn't mean being boring. both before and after harvard, elle embraced her femininity, and you can too!

3. don't let anything stop you

elle was stereotyped as a bimbo/dumb blonde throughout the entirety of both movies, but that didn't stop her in the slightest.

4. confidence and not caring

she got weird looks for wearing hot pink in a courtroom, decorating her office 'too much', the list goes on. but she didn't care. she didn't want to be a copy-and-paste lawyer. also, think about it like this, let's say you want to become a lawyer like elle. you may end up having to defend someone who committed a serious crime that you don't agree with. depending on how big the case gets, you'll face a lot of public scrutiny for doing that. but you shouldn't care. why? because you know that deep down, you didn't agree with that person, you were just doing your job.

5. study anywhere, anytime, everywhere, everytime

don't let an appointment or change in schedule stop you from studying, especially if it'll be detrimental to your grade. elle literally had her textbook at the hair salon with her. she was studying while exercising. if she didn't let those things distract her or stop her, why should you?

6. always be kind

elle was kind to everyone she met. she was even nice to vivian, her ex's new girlfriend. a lot of women get threatened by that, but elle didn't.

[kamfor334]

have a role model.

One tip everyone should have, is to have a role model.

A role model is someone you look up to in a certain way for a specific reason, like for their hardworking mindset, grit or skill.

Having a role model is good for multiple reasons, it gives you someone to look up to and admire, which can inspire and motivate you. My role model is Wonyoung!

How do you find a role model?

firstly, find someone who inspires you, it should be someone you find from something your interested in! For me, I found Wonyoung because I liked kpop, and thought the internet movement Wonyoungism. Secondly, find why this person inspires you. For me, I look up to wonyoung because her beauty radiates, confident and elegant presence. Not only that, but she has a kind, hardworking, intelligent and extremely good mindset! Also known as the lucky Vicky mindset. This gave me an outline for who I wanted to be when improving myself!

and lastly, make a manifesto, or a vison board! Yours can b physically or digital. Personally, I used Pinterest, and I also plan on making a notion manifesto. This will motivate and inspire you when looking at it/reading it! Add pictures of your role model, quotes from them, and their aesthetic. “You are you, I am me.” - 🐰

and you don’t just have to have one role model, you can have multiple if you want! Your role model doesn’t have to be a real person either, they can be a fictional character as well.

Here are some ideas for a role model, real and fictional!

Regina George, ell woods, Rory Gilmore, jia song, marilyn monroe, Wonyoung, Maddy Perez or Alexa Demie.

Let me know about a role model you have in to comments!

[p1nkm1lkslug]

HII I have a very self indulgent request, could you write some headcanons for Isaac with an S/O who’s like Elle Woods from Legally Blonde? She wears a lot of pink, feminine and is extroverted and very bubbly and energetic and just genuinely kind, but also very determined. I rewatched it this morning and remembered how much of my personality is based off her and couldn’t get this idea out of my head. 💕

LEGALLY BLONDE 🔛🔝🗣️💯🙏🙏💯 it's literally in my top five 2000s movies list, I luv Elle sm 😭 (I wrote this while playing Ariana Grande also I just realized I have ice coffee)

On his knees,begging,crying,hes so down bad it's lethal

I've been obsessed with Issac and having a very pop girlie ultra fem s/o and he's most definitely the type of guy to literally be an absolute simp over his partner

like no brooding or hiding, he is genuinely gonna break down because of how sweet you are towards him, he's getting a cavity as we speak

I mentioned that Issac is the type to remember things you tell him and I also believe him and Frankie have girl dad energy, so just getting your nails done and showing them to him and he's just like "ah i see we went with the pink gel and bow charms today"

Going out in public is funny because you have the most Cartoonishly evill man in a fucking cape with the sound of an organ and a murder of crows that follow him and he's just hand in hand with Malibu Barbie

Similarly in the movie of you are the type to be fem and have an interest that doesn't have many people who dress alternative then Issac just loves watching you destroy people with your knowledge (because who says you can't wear a pink dress and enjoy STEAM)

I feel like you two met in the apartment complex maybe Issac is walking by the grey skies city looking lost at all that is around him everything a murky mess , and then as he walks by a flash of pink just runs by him and he's met with this sweet perfume

As he just turns to see you quickly running to catch your train, and he practically can't pull his eyes away from you, you stood out like a sore thumb, as you had just missed your next stop you turn and see him gazing at you

Issac doesn't even realize until you flash him a small smile and quickly strut over to him with your small pumps clicking on the floor

"Hello! Sorry to bother I'm sure your busy but would you have the time with you? " And he's just left with his jaw on the ground

HAIR CAREER you saw Elle in the opening clip her hair is beautiful, and Issac has some nice locks so please give him a whole self care day, he deserves to wear pink jelly under eye patches

"This one smells lovely" "Its bath and body works strawberry pound cake! "

He's loaded and he knows it, he's practically threatening you to take his card and shop til you drop

DID SOMEONE SAY HEART LOCKET NECKLACE

In my Rory hcs I mentioned him watching movies with reader and I do for most hcs but the two of you in your hyper pink furry bed as a small tv you use to own plays an early 2000s movie

"And so because of her stupid boyfriend she wants to go law school" "I see.." Issac says slightly smiling "what?" You reply with a small giggle "well...she seems quite similar to you" "Aw that's so sweet"

[lilliesthings]

I saw it as Gideon feeding is own ego, with a protege of his own after being one to Max. He definitely was someone who could read people well (i mean he was a PROFILER). He found a young gifted man who didn't have anybody and paid attention to him and convinced him to join him in his career. I believe he tried to do the same with Ethan since they mentioned he was at the academy at the same time, but Ethan dipped to become a jazz musician. Gideon had the power to push Reid through the processes of joining theBau and Reid was essentially his pet project. Reid got someone who wanted him around and Gideon got praised for scouting him and their department running smoother than ever. Ultimately Gideon didn't really help Reid through anything, and then abandoned him with a letter instead of actually saying goodbye to him. He KNEW how much that would hurt someone like Reid and did it anyway. He set up a chess game and never showed and made him seek him out. (tw for MCD) Though, to be fair, it is surmised by some that they changed the script at some point, possibly due to Mandy's demands at the time. It's been said the original intent was for Gideon to have committed suicide and that Reid was supposed to have found him there along with a note. Which would have been WORSE, obviously. That all playing out just as Reid was also finally sober and had no other parental figures in his life, it would have been even more devastating.

I'm not looking forward to them bringing back someone with a connection to Gideon on the show, and without Reid being there who was arguably the closest person he had in the seasons he was on seems kind of dull. Then have Rossi bring him up, someone we only ever saw him talk to in flashbacks of their youth. He left the show in 2007 and died in 2015 I'm tired of Gideon. Are they going to just rehash Gideon drama forever?

Tbh, to me, it was Gideon assuaging his own guilt towards Stephen.

Gideon is a flawed flawed man, and a running theme they seemed to have with him is that while he takes those actions, with no malicious intent, he can't foresee their terrible consequences : the 6 agents, Elle in the Fisher King, Reid in Revelations, and in the grand scheme of things, bringing Reid into the FBI thinking he's doing right by him, which didn't turn out so good depending on how you look at it. When the consequences really catch up to him, he seems to be in way over his head and can't follow through. He didn't show up for his son to the point where Stephen thought he wasn't wanted (and was quite detached at the news of his death, in a striking contrast to Spencer). But Gideon is also compassionate and he genuinely cares, he bought Reid these tickets for his birthday, he walked him through that (not) date, through his first kill, told him he was proud of him. For me at least, the reason they gravitated toward each other is that for awhile they filled a void in each other's lives of the absent father and the distant son, and it was his way of compensating for abandoning Stephen. But I also think he cared nowhere as intensely about Reid as Reid cared about him, and even that too was not out of malice (which makes it kinda more sad)

He was right to leave, and he was wrong in the incredibly convoluted way he did it. He could have answered Reid's calls, he could have sent a text saying that he's safe but he's leaving, hell he could have MAILED that letter, because people loved him and were clearly worried for his well being and whereabouts at this point. But to make someone doing the whole guesswork of going to a cabin in the middle of the woods to fetch a letter? That looked bad. I would have had a heart attack. 

I admit liked him a whole lot as a character, I particularly enjoyed seeing him walking in circles in Hankel's bathroom telling himself that he did the right thing. I genuinely like watching character's fuck ups play out, but I agree that Gideon at this point seems so detached from the show, and without Reid there either to act unhinged at the mention of him ... eh ..... we'll see I guess.

[acidichcl]

Your tmnt iteration seems unique.. /pos What's your inspiration for it? I've never seen anyone take on tmnt like that :0

Lol thanks! There's quite a few inspos. Sgt frog, wander over yonder, and legally blonde. It's a mix of goof and messages about determination, things like that

sgt frog's and Wander Over Yonder's silly fun dynamics while also having emotional and heartwarming moments. Specifically i really like Lord Hater's dynamic with Wander and i based my Shredder and Leo off them lol theyre so silly

For legally blonde, i really like the message. Elle is charismatic, kind, optimistic, shes very resillient and I really look up to her. And so I want my April to embrace feminity kinda like how Elle Woods does while also really showing how strong she is. April has her flaws and her problems to face but she continues to keep going forward. In a world where you can be anything, be kind

[teeth-cable]

The stella hate she received is too much and this is the twisted thing i see, they compare stella to amber heard an actual real life victim of abuse. Amber heard this woman who speak up about being abused by her husband johnny depp what does she get death threat, harassment, bullied, mockery , etc. Stella this character is so demonized that a lot people don't ever think she's a sentient being with emotion too

If we look at historical context often the female royal member are often seeing baby making machine. Only a few female royal member become leader in the monarchy system often it's male royal member. The systemic sexism if the husband of royal famliy cheat the wife get in trouble and consider failure of her marriage. That means stella she's very disadvantage

1. Stolas cheat she consider to be failure not stolas

2. Stella doesn't play any important role her role is just sit there and looking pretty

3. She is disposable after fullfiling her role now the system consider her useless

4. Her noble rank her parent definitely want their status to be elevated so of course they choose stella

5. Often woman in this system get abused and they put in really high standard

And stolas. I'm sorry people are so desperate painting him as not like the other royalty who's relatable, kind, down to earth, no he's not even closed to that. The writer fail that part i seen character who's royalty actually use their privilege for good

Example : Zuko (avatar the last airbender), Elena(Elena of avalor), sofia(sofia the first), Charlotte le bouff( Princess and the frog), Elle Woods(Legally blonde)

In question did stolas use her privilege for good? All he did use to exploit blitzo and use that for he's own benefit. Vivziepop you know diana spencer can be used as one of your inspiration right? Diana spencer princess of wales this is an example of royal family member use her privilege for good

She break the stigma people who have hiv and aids, she actually interact with other people who have different status from her, she care about people well being, because of that a lot people liked her. After she died people also remember and sadden by her death

How about let's not compare real life cases of abused victims to the abuse fictional characters are suffering from a poorly written demon show?

Exactly, that's what fans are not understanding either. The critical community doesn't pity and empathize with Stella because we see her as this harmless angel but because she is also a victim like Stolas is of Hell's monarchy system. Whether fans want to admit it or not, Stella would absolute take the blame for the marriage failing, not Stolas. Stolas has an important role to do, they wanted a heir to HIS throne, and to quote HezuNeutral from their, Helluva Boss Continues to Circle Spiral video,"If Stella was infertile she'd be screw" because her only purpose in this system is to give birth. It's frustrating that Stella gets reduce to a black and white villain instead of a morally gray one because Viv doesn't want to be nuanced about the affair but even more frustrating, she can't even do her role as a villain right because not only is Stella, terrible inaccurate rep of domestic abusers but also because she is so dumb that she needs her brother to point out when Stolas dies, all of his things would be inherited by Octavia and not her. As if (I'm assuming) one of the actual reasons why she stayed in the marriage was because she like spending his money and what caused them to be so miserable was she and Stolas were arranged to give birth to an heir!

Stolas isn't good either, he still treats imps like shit, using his butler as a stressed toy, talking down to imps, it's just he “acts" less racist towards I.M.P.

[ginevrastilinski-ocs]

Narnia OCs Time!!

It's the my Narnia's babies time! Since it seems like we're all in this mood, I thought it was a good moment to introduce them! (Special thanks to @andromedalestrange and @randomestfandoms-ocs for some fcs, I was getting crazy so thank you darlings!)

Also two little things I feel the need to tell: it's been a while since the last time I read the Chronicles (so don't yell at me pls) and! My ocs are going to be a "fusion" of the books and the movies (Like, taking my favourite things from both and changing what I don't like... Susan not returning at all for example lmao) And! It's me finding a different way to make almost all of them immortal/ageless/slow-aging bc I want them being in more than one movie/book lmao

Last thing, I'm gonna to explain so little about their plot/vibes/actual things so if you wanna know more about some specific ocs feel free to send an ask, I can't wait to talk about them more 🥺

Tagging my Narnia besties @daughter-of-melpomene @come-along-pond @dancingsunflowers-ocs bc I think they would enjoy this (tell me if I didn't have to 🥺)

Nevan Dair - basically Powerful Boy so The White Witch kidnapped recruted him as her little puppet right-hand man (yep, he's a child and there's a lot of manipulation here); meets Edmund and goes on full "I'm going to murder for you" so betrays Jadis; basically immortal (but not really, it's complicated) for the spark inside him; looks like they would kill you is actually a cinnamon roll vibe; Edmund Pevensie ship FC: Kit Young

Margaret "Magpie" Kirke - Digory Kirke's granddaughter; lives with her grandpa bc oopsie dead parents; enters in Narnia with the Pevensie sibs (and becomes a Queen of Narnia actually); will come back once again with them (and the third time she'll stay in Narnia lol); Peter Pevensie & Prince Caspian ship FC: Florence Pugh

Elizabeth "Liz" Pevensie - Edmund's twin sister; one of the ruler of Narnia along side her sibilings; will also be the Last Queen before the destruction of Narnia alongside Aine; Aine Meraxes ship FC: Maisie Williams

Verena Mars - Narnian noble, fights against the White Witch, meets the Pevensie sibs, during their reign her and Susan fall in love; when they come back to the Human World Aslan doesn't let her follow them so she finds a way to become "ethereal"/ageless to wait Susan's come back (is ready to kill Aslan anyone that comes in her way of having her happy ending); basically I'm all we supports women rights and wrongs; Susan Pevensie ship ovb FC: Hailee Steinfeld

Arjuna - The White Witch descendant, semi immortal due the Silver Apple her mother ate; will eventually bretray her mother for saving the kids she befriended; Peter Pevensie ship FC: Freya Allan

Avaluna Lohan Kirke - baby born under the Golden Age; wants to visit the Human World so searches the Door the Pevensie arrived with; basically finds it when they found the Lamp-post so she leaves with them and is now stuck in the Human World; gets adopted by Digory Kirke bc how do you explain it to anyone else?; Lucy ship FC: Elle Fanning

Aine Meraxes - princess of a little independent reign on a Isle on the borders of Narnia; they have dragons lol; the Long Winter didn't get there bc a Coven protects it; gets called for help against the White Witch; is a witch herself; uses a similar spell the White Witch used on Charn after the Golden Age ends; will eventually be the Last Queen of Narnia alongside Liz; Liz Pevensie ship FC: Milly Alcock

Killian Evada - leader of a secret organization that plots against the White Witch; turns out that is actually a human that found Narnia; comes back on Earth with the Pevensie sibs; Edmund Pevensie ship FC: Thomas Brodie Sangster

Shivani - world traveller (basically is born with the power of yellow and geen rings); comes from a world that was destroyed before Narnia was born and has lived for non-specified time in the Wood Between The Worlds; the time there made them kind of immortal; ship TBD FC: Jessie Mei Li

Amaranta Ira - High Witch of Narnia (at least she should be); her ancestors used to be the Second In Command of Narnia's Army before the Age of Winter; became basically the Narnian version of a vigilante during the White Witch's reign lmao; (will probably be with the Pevensie when they come back so she is stuck in England for a long time); Caspian and/or Edmund ship FC: Amita Suman

Leocadius Thorne - comes from a family of librarians basically; actually, keepers of the list of every Narnian Ruler since the beginning of everything; no plot just vibes ship TBD FC: Isaac Hempstead Wright

Merletta of Narnia - Aslan's priestess; just a little bit of plot, mainly vibes; ship TBD (but maybe Lucy Pevensie) FC: Ceara Coveney

Neera Merwyna - siren and pirate (sort of); no plot just vibes; Prince Caspian ship FC: Halle Bailey

Fitzroy Mahogany - Narnian noble? this is literally "I just vibe with this fc but I have no plot, might scrap them but until then..."; ship TBD (Peter?) FC: Douglas Booth

[1moreoffkeyanthem]

Ok so I did the hcs of what OrangeJuiceVerse Stan and Kyle look like already (here) so now I gotta do the rest of the Star Seven

*Kenny- this guy is littttllllleeee like short king oh my god this poor mf grew up constantly malnourished and never grew taller than 5’5! I’ll write Kenny all across the board appearance wise but ojverse? He’s short. And he OWNS it!!! He’s also my king of fully climbing on everyone physical boundaries are not a thing with him (this is a problem when he meets Craig and Tweek) and he and Stan both have a penchant for hugging people but Kenny is the type to be like “watch if I run at Stan he’ll catch me” “wait no Kenny I’m holding coffee” *catches him* lmfao my beloved Disaster Duo. Kenny’s tiny ass is literally alllllways on Marj.

Sandy blond hair and the style changes CONSTANTLY he’s a MENACE with the scissors, but it’s usually on the long side and YES he grows a beard in his late 20s (this started as a bet with Stan to see who could grow the better one) he 100% braids it and puts glitter and flowers in it smh eccentric icon. Pretty light blue eyes, they look vaguely purple for a few days after he comes back from a death.

He dresses like a damn muppet half the time, and a lot of his clothes are stuff he made himself (artist slay) or found at a thrift store and altered, out here wearing shirts with vulgar sayings, weird clown pants, juicy sweatsuits, obnoxious Hawaiian shirts with leopard print leggings, like this man lives for looking like a weirdo. But the other half of the time he’s in jeans and t shirts, hoodies, and (also artist slay and literally me) so much of what he owns has some kind of paint or bleach stain. His go to “formal” attire is legitimately a floral suit with PRINCESS embroidered on the back.

*Marjorine- my tall goddess! She’s the third tallest of the 7 at 5’11 (Kenny is very into that) and loves to wear heels so she’s really out here towering over the peasants like the QUEEN she is lmao. She also dresses like a BARBIE I’m talkin the pastels that perfectly flatter her coloration, def some seersucker a-line dresses, MONOGRAMMED STUFF bruh they may be from assfucknowherecolorado but this lady dresses like she’s a pageant queen in the Deep South! It very much fits her as the baddest bitch in the mlm meeting (y’all keep her away from that shit frfr) she’s such a sweetie but she’s so damn susceptible to stuff like that oh noooo but then she winds up running the show 💀

She does indeed have the Eye Scar (blind in that eye she can’t legally drive rip) one eye is this pretty disney princess blue and the other is almost white but she looks SO fucking cool and the juxtaposition of her otherwise angelic features with a badass anime protagonist scar is KICKASS! Plussss since she dresses like fuckin Elle Woods but is taller than God just the BAD BITCH VIBES!!!

*CRAIG TUCKER MY DUDE!!! Ok so I believe I said that this mf is whole ass 6’4!!! “Yer a long boi ain’t ya” like bruh he’s so damn lanky whole ass string bean lmfao. I am an enjoyer of the Peruvian Crog hcs, so yep. Really dark black hair and grey eyes, he’s also like super hot??? I’m talking PERFECT skin, the most gorgeous chiseled face he deadass looks like a statue and women are all over him tryna flirt BUT!!! this mf is gayer than a mf picnic basket 😭

He’s seriously so cool looking but if you tell him that he’ll be like ?? It’s so funny bc Stan’s over here like “dude how do you wear a leather jacket without looking like a douchebag” and Craig’s like “idk?? I just do?” smh poor Stan he wants to look cool so bad and and Craig’s the only “cool guy” he knows but he’s not helpful at alllll.

He mostly dresses in dark colors, black, gray, navy, he’s like super hot but he is SUCH a loser!!! (I’m stealing this from my partner btw) one time he was just… walking around the apartment dressed as Spider-Man? And didn’t even acknowledge it? Like Tweek had a migraine and was bedridden and Craig fully just went up to him IN THE SPIDEY SUIT and handed him a jar of pickles “you should eat” Tweek was like “man WHAT are you doing dressed like that?!?” SMH he’s actually an icon

*TWEEK!!!!! Ok so Tweek (I’m projecting y’all know I love an artist character) he doesn’t own a single item of clothing that isn’t stained. And he mostly sticks to earth tones, a lot of green and brown, also let’s talk abt his skin. He has TERRIBLE skin! Cystic acne, he’s blotchy as shit, rosacea, got moles and freckles everywhere, acne on the left side of his chin from throwing up (when he’s in the drankin era) Kyle described him as scrunkly when they met lmfao like twerk is really just one of those little stray cats you see on the street. He’s honestly really cute tho

He’s LITTLE he’s Kenny’s height at 5’5 BUT!!! He’s literally so fuckin strong! Like out of him and crog? Tweek’s the jar opener. He has… actually kicked Stan’s ass at the gym (it was so unserious Stan was being angsty about a birthday and Ky was like “dude go spar Tweek or sum” and Stan has reservations bc he’s like a foot taller than Tweek and so much bigger and then Tweek kicked his ass!) smh they came home from the local planet fitness both smiling so hard and crog and ky were like TF?!?!? Like why are y’all beat up to hell

Tweek has very light blond hair, it’s technically curly but he pulls the hell out of it so it just kinda stands straight out, it literally feels like straw someone get this man some Fuckin conditioner

*Cartman! Ok I stand by him having heterochromia, he’s got one brown eye and one blue, totally thinks it makes him look “awesome and kewl” (it does lowkey) unfortunately he’s actually very attractive until he calls you a slur lmao. His features are literally perfect, he takes care of himself, skincare on point, LISTEN HE IS SO ABSURD about his cocktail of products it’s literally asinine

He’s around 5’9, and fat. Light brown hair that he keeps fairly short and ALWAYS immaculately styled. Like this guy cleans up NICE and u meet him for the first time and are thinking you’re meeting a very friendly lawyer type dude but then you shake his hand and he goes “what’s with the sword earrings, what? You just get off a dnd session?” Lmfao literally I cannot stress enough that he never grows out of being an asshole. He does MOSTLY stop with the truly offensive things though. Mostly. The Fuckwad Jar may have had something to do with it.