#but I never had so much fun self shipping with a character before

[snekdood]

bitches prolly out here psychoanalyzing my old art on behalf of my abuser to cushion their belief that im a Horrible Person but then dont see the irony when I point out the shitty things my abuser has drawn and how I see it as clear evidence of their mindset and beliefs (of what's okay to do and how to treat people) descending and pairing that along with everything else they've done and it paints a clear picture of how this person got to the point of thinking it was okay to abuse me the way they did and then the people looking for reasons to hate me through my art will act like "they're just drawings !!!" about their art. which one is it. does someones art say something about them or not? or does it only say something about them if you hate them?

[kyri45]

A final letter

Hello Everyone!

The queue is paused and everything is scheduled, which means we are ready for the finale!

I know that, in the end, this was just a silly side project for me, with everything else going on in my life. But for this occasion, I wanted to drop some words here and hope they make sense.

I started watching LMK only because a friend told me there was a "Sonadow-coded" ship. I ended up consuming the entire thing in one sitting on July 10th, 2024. At the time, I was still recovering from a bike accident that had left me with a broken right forearm—unable to draw for a little over a month. (I did try drawing with my left finger, but it wasn't exactly fun.)

Not only that, but it was summer, and I couldn’t enjoy the season or practice my main sport, windsurfing. To say I was feeling the blues is an understatement. I remember being in physical pain just from not being able to draw my sillies. But then, watching LMK did something to my brain chemistry that my little undiagnosed autistic self had never experienced before. It hit so hard that I’ve been physically unable to rewatch the show SINCE that very first day. (And y’all still call me the CEO of this fandom. Bro, I just work here.)

A lot of you have asked what inspired me to start this comic or to draw LMK fan art in the first place. While my usual answer is, "I saw Shadowpeach and thought MK could be their lovechild, given his appearance," the moment that actually started it all was THIS ONE—

(I HAD TO REWATCH THIS SCENE TO MAKE THE GIF AND IT HURT ME ON A MOLECOLAR LEVEL)

I have… a thing for characters who discover their entire identity was something else all along. It consumes my thoughts, my dreams, my every waking moment. I live for identity crises, for characters who thought they knew who they were, only to be forced to rediscover themselves, their existence, and their place in the world. If you give me a story where a character has to go through that, I will like it—regardless of how bad the rest of the story is.

Pair that with loads of trauma, daddy issues, the pressure of a legacy, and world-ending stakes, and congrats! Now I’m obsessed, and I will not stop thinking about it for the rest of my days!

At first, my brain just wanted to release some of that energy with a small, four-panel post about the monkeys discovering that MK was technically their kid.

That was supposed to be it.

But since I never seem to learn my lesson, it didn’t stay like that. Because once I started drawing, I just... continued.

And

I

never

stopped.

A lot of you have also asked how I found the motivation to draw so much, to never take a break. Well, I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it one last time: I am my number one fan. No matter how much you laughed, cried, screamed, or went feral over this story, I did all of that and more. Because I got to think about the chapters months before they released. I got to daydream about them. I got to watch them come to life—first through sketches, then line art, then dialogue. And finally, I got to witness your reactions and see the incredible creations you made, inspired by my story.

So yeah, in a way, it was almost an addiction. A good addiction. Because, for the first time in my life, I actually understood what loving art means.

I’ve been drawing for ten years, working professionally for five, but I never loved art before. I just liked it because I happened to be good at it. But creating this comic made me understand why artists say, "Oh, I’ve loved drawing since I was a child!" This was the first time I allowed myself to create purely for my own enjoyment. Something I hadn’t had the privilege to do for a long time.

Other than making me feel even more single than I already was, this story somehow also helped me a little with my own family relationships. So yeah. Crazy how the gay monkeys changed my life.

Of course, I never could have predicted how much traction my AU would gain. Man, y’all were really starving to latch onto something this silly. /j

But yeah—thank you. Thank you for sticking around until the end, for having the patience and trust to follow the story even when I made you rage with angst and cliffhangers. (The statement in my bio still stands: I am not responsible for any physical or emotional damage my art has caused.)

I’m absolutely shit at thanking people, or at writing, or at talking in general, honestly. I’m the furthest thing from being good with words, so I hope the final chapter will be enough to show you my gratitude.

Through this story, I met so many wonderful, talented people. I watched as fans across different platforms found each other through memes and fanart of the AU. I saw artists start their own AUs inspired by mine, growing their own communities. I witnessed an explosion of creativity and collaboration through our takeovers. And I laughed along with you all.

And yeah—at its core, this story has always been about love. Whether it’s platonic, sibling, parental, romantic, or whatever the hell Mac and Wukong had going on for millennia.

At its heart, it’s a story about family.

And maybe, in the end… the real family wasn’t just the one in the comic, but the one we’ve found together along the way. 💛

See you all at the finale.

Love you all, freaks /affectionate

Jade

[sh4nksslvt]

The Lost Reader

A mysterious reader of Poneglyphs finds a new home among the Straw Hat Pirates, slowly becoming an irreplaceable part of their crew as their love for them grows.

READER WHO CAN READ AND SPEAK PONEGLYPH

Strawhats x Poneglyph gn!reader ౨ৎ💗 ONE SHOT

main characters: luffy, zoro, sanji, nami, robin

tags: fluff, sfw, harem(?), soft

a/n: this js me trying to write ffs, this is experimental and for fun only so expect this ffs cringe and oc

words count: 1.9k

masterlist | ko-fi

: 𓏲🐋 ๋࣭  ࣪ ˖✩࿐࿔ 🌊

It started with silence.

Not the heavy kind that suffocates—but the quiet peace of wind brushing through trees, waves lapping against the sand, and birds singing above crumbled ruins. Your only companions were time-worn Poneglyphs, mossy stone relics, and the hollow ache of knowing you shouldn’t exist.

You didn’t know what you were—only that you could read them. The Poneglyphs. Their words came to you like breath, like blood. It wasn’t learned. It just… was.

And then one day, the silence broke.

“WOOOOAAAHH! What a weird island!!”

You looked up from a worn page, blinking at the explosion of sound.

A rubber man had landed face-first in your tomato garden.

You blinked again, rubbing your eyes to make sure you weren’t imagining the scene before you. The man—his limbs were stretched at impossible angles, and his face was, well… currently smushed into the dirt of your carefully cultivated tomato patch.

“Luffy!” a woman’s voice shouted from the shore. “Stop crashing into things!”

You stared in disbelief, watching as a circus of chaos disembarked from a sunny, lion-faced ship. At least, that’s what it looked like to you.

“Wha—?” You stumbled back, half-wondering if you’d stepped into some sort of dream. But no, the crew’s laughter was real. Loud, boisterous, utterly chaotic, and very much present.

Before you could comprehend the whirlwind that had just descended upon your quiet life, a figure bounded toward you. The rubber man—Luffy—was grinning at you like you were the most interesting thing he’d seen all day. And, for all you knew, you were.

“Hey! Who're you? you live here? cool! SHISHISHI” Luffy asked, already sitting cross-legged on the ground as if he hadn’t just completely flattened your garden. “Wanna eat with us?”

You blinked, still too stunned to form a coherent sentence. “I… guess?...Im Y/N”

And so began your first real encounter with the Straw Hat Pirates.

Nami, with her keen eyes and sharp questions, immediately assessed the situation, interrogating you about your maps and supplies like she was about to audit your entire existence. Sanji, the ever-romantic chef, started cooking a feast so lavish that you were half-tempted to check if the food had its own backstory. The man even had heart-shaped eyes every time you praised his cooking.

Usopp, ever the over-the-top self-proclaimed hero, proudly handed you a coconut with a grin that could only be described as a “friendship orb.” “From me to you,” he declared, as if he had just made the world’s most profound offering.

And then there was Chopper, who took your pulse the second he saw you, declaring that you had “island person syndrome” and needed immediate attention.

Robin, however, watched you closely. Her gaze sharp but gentle, as if trying to figure out a puzzle no one else could see.

“You can read those stones, can’t you?” she asked, voice barely above a whisper.

You stiffened. The question sent a shiver through your spine, a fleeting reminder of the secret you kept buried deep within. You didn’t answer. Not immediately.

She smiled, soft and knowing, her eyes never leaving yours. “We’ll talk later.”

Zoro, ever the brooding figure, glanced at you and muttered under his breath, “You don’t look dangerous.” It seemed like a funny thing to say, considering he had just been trying to slice a boulder in half mere moments earlier.

It didn’t take long for you to realize what was happening: You were trapped in their orbit. In their madness. In their chaos.

And you couldn’t have been more content.

The Thousand Sunny became your new home—bright, loud, and utterly unpredictable.

Sanji insisted on cooking you all your meals. Breakfast, lunch, dinner—each time, his cooking came with a full-on serenade, and if you didn’t finish your plate, he might just shed a tear. “It’s not just food,” he’d say. “It’s love. It’s my soul in a dish!”

Nami dragged you into shopping sprees with no regard for your dwindling supplies or your protestations. “You need to look fabulous, Y/N. Don’t you want to blend in with the rest of us?” she’d tease, while tossing a dozen new outfits into your arms. You always ended up spending more than you intended, but there was something so infectious about her enthusiasm that you couldn’t bring yourself to care.

Robin was the one who quietly fascinated you. You’d find her at all hours of the day, absorbed in reading a book or studying the surroundings with quiet intensity. There was something about the way she looked at you, like she already knew your secrets but would never pry.

And then there was Luffy. Always smiling. Always laughing. He treated you as though you were already part of the crew. No pretense, no hesitation. You didn’t even need to be invited. You were just… in.

“Wanna ride on top of the mast?” Luffy asked one morning, as casually as if he were asking if you wanted a snack.

You stared up at the towering mast, then back at him. “Is that… safe?”

“Nope! shishishi” he beamed, looking excited about the prospect.

Somehow, that made it make sense to climb up there with him. He helped you up like it was nothing, laughing all the while. The wind whipped through your hair, and for the first time in a long while, you felt alive. You weren’t just existing anymore.

Zoro, ever the silent guardian, began training near you. You noticed him constantly observing your movements, his gaze intense but not unwelcome. One day, you lost your footing on deck, but before you could even react, his hand shot out and steadied you.

He didn’t say much, just stared at you for a moment, before clearing his throat and muttering, “Watch your step, dumbass.”

Romance, clearly.

It crept in slowly. Unnoticed, at first.

Sanji’s compliments, light-hearted at first, began to hold a different weight. “You look beautiful today, Y/N~chwann” he’d say with a soft smile, not just as a joke, but as something that meant more.

Nami’s teasing turned into lingering glances, moments where her eyes softened when she thought no one was looking.

Robin’s hand on yours during those quiet late-night reading sessions made your heart skip a beat, like it was a shared secret, a connection you didn’t have the words to describe.

Zoro’s silence, once intimidating, became your comfort. When he was near, you didn’t need to talk. You didn’t need to explain yourself. He was just there, a steady presence.

And Luffy’s laughter—oh, Luffy’s laughter. It started to feel like home, like the sound of safety, of warmth. A constant reminder that with him around, there was nothing to fear.

But you kept your secret.

That was until one night, when you and Robin stood over a relic you had no business being near. It was buried deep beneath the cursed island’s soil, half-buried like a forgotten truth. Robin stood behind you, arms crossed, waiting for you to decipher it. You already knew what it would say, but that didn’t stop the rush of dread that surged within you as your fingers traced the ancient glyphs.

“You know what it says, don’t you?” Robin’s voice was barely a whisper. It wasn’t a question. It was a statement.

You stiffened.

“It’s just a story,” you muttered, voice low.

Robin smiled, a soft and knowing smile, one that suggested she understood far more than she let on. “Then you should know—they’d kill you for it.”

You didn’t answer, didn’t have the words. You just continued to trace the lines, the ancient language flowing effortlessly from your mind, sinking into the earth beneath your fingertips.

Everything changed when you found the half-buried Poneglyph on a cursed island.

It was a trap. Not for Luffy. Not for the Pirate King in the making.

For you.

You read the stone aloud, your voice quiet, shaking slightly. And for the first time in your life, the stone responded.

The words were not just etched into stone, not just an inscription—it was a message. A message that burned through the world like a beacon.

“The last of the Whisperers,” it said. “Hunted. Hidden. Forbidden.”

The ground shook. The air turned electric. The Poneglyphs around you shimmered, the glyphs becoming light, illuminating the island with a soft, ethereal glow.

The Straw Hats arrived just as you stumbled backward, your eyes wide, heart pounding, the power coursing through you like an uncontrollable force. The glyphs pulsed, and the power in your veins burned bright.

“What’s happening?!” Usopp screamed, looking ready to fight a ghost.

You looked at them—at your crew—and whispered, “They were hunting us. People who could read these stones. I shouldn’t exist.”

There was silence.

Then Luffy stepped forward, his voice unwavering, “You’re not alone.”

The Marines came shortly after.

You fought, of course you did.

For the first time in your life, you let the power in your blood surge freely. The words of the stone became light, flames of energy erupting from the ground as you slashed through the battlefield, carving the very earth with your newfound strength. You cracked the island’s crust. You didn’t even know you could do that.

Sanji’s hand grabbed yours as the ground beneath you cracked, pulling you from the collapsing cliff. Zoro fought beside you, silent and determined. Robin’s steady hand on yours kept you grounded in the chaos.

When the battle was over, and the last Marine had been driven back, you passed out.

You woke in the infirmary, Chopper hovering over you, his worried eyes darting around like he was waiting for you to disappear again. Franky was sitting beside you, sobbing into a bowl of soup.

“You scared us, you moron,” Nami whispered, brushing your hair back from your face. Her voice was soft, a rare tenderness that made your heart ache.

Robin kissed your temple as she hovered over you, whispering, “You’re more than your gift.”

Sanji didn’t say anything, but his presence was unmistakable. He curled up beside you, pressing his forehead to your shoulder, a silent vow of protection.

Zoro sat across from you, cleaning his swords. “Don’t ever do that alone again.”

And Luffy… Luffy beamed at you, that infectious smile lighting up his face as he exclaimed, “You’re stuck with us forever now!”

The tension unraveled like fraying rope.

Nami kissed you when you least expected it, quick and teasing, a spark of affection.

Robin kissed you in the library, with parchment between your hands, and the world felt like it stopped turning for a moment.

Sanji kissed you with all the intensity of someone who had been waiting for years, every touch filled with longing.

Zoro kissed you like it was the only thing that made sense, his hands warm and steady.

And Luffy—Luffy’s kiss was upside down, playful, and completely unexpected, but perfect in the way only Luffy could be.

Usopp ran away screaming, “AAAH! ROMANCE ATTACK!”

Chopper fainted. Twice.

Brook played a love song with three verses about your “sultry stare” that made everyone uncomfortable except Sanji, who wept.

Franky asked if you wanted to build a heart-shaped cannon to “blast your feelings at the world.” You said yes. It now sits in the garden.

Jinbei just gave you a nod and said, “It’s about time.”

You weren’t a secret anymore.

You were theirs.

Not claimed, not owned—but cherished. Loved, wholly and fiercely.

And though the world may hunt you, you had a crew that would burn it down before they let anyone take you.

[circuitcircus]

in defense of kabumisu……..

addressing things I see people say about why kabru being shipped w mithrun is ‘bad’ or why their canon relationship ‘doesn’t mean anything’ while also clearing up misconceptions of the characters some fans have

listen it keeps popping up and I just gotta do this or my brain will melt (if you don’t see it around then god I wish that were me) there’s an age gap!- erm there’s also an age gap in farcille (ily), the most popular ship in the series...also chilchuck looks like a kid but a lot of fans recognize him as a dilf because of his relative age, so there should be no age gap discourse among adult characters because it feels so conditional tbh

kabru taking care of mithrun is racist!- marcille likes to take care of others as well. is that sexist, or just an aspect of her character?

kabru isn’t treated like a servant, waiting on mithrun hand and foot…I mean he gives mithrun a foot massage but no one told him to do all that lmfao

he's also not the only one to care for mithrun. pattadol is shown to worry for him and milsril was the one to start taking care mithrun in the first place after he…...y’know. speaking of which-

they probably met when kabru was a kid!- neither of them showed signs of recognizing each other the entire time mithrun was introduced nor when they were together. and im pretty sure KABRU of all people would show some kind of recognition if they'd met before. it's kabru!!! the people person!!! mr. "i-noted-down-50+-characters-in-this-dude's-backstory-for-fun-and-actually-enjoy-social-gatherings"

you would think some kind of memory would come back to him especially after hearing mithrun’s backstory if milsril had even told kabru about him as a kid. but nope. it’s just fan speculation unless there's a side comic suggesting otherwise that i haven't seen

mithrun doesn't care about kabru, his shapeshift double looked like shit!- it's obviously because of mithrun's (then) lack of desires that it looked like that, but they really grow on each other

i think it's safe to assume it'd look more like kabru after they spent so much time together (also laios can barely even remember kabru's name..also saw his face multiple times and didn’t recognize him when they talked for the first time)

mithrun is racist!- he’s actually the least likely character to be racist since he lost his desires and that includes a desire for superiority over others. he even calls his past self out on that part of himself. the other elves in that side comic were being just as racist to shorter lived races but just didn’t use ‘outdated slurs’

(unfortunately literally every main character in dunmeshi is at least a lil prejudiced, but I believe it’s worldbuilding and a sign of the times rather than a reason ryoko kui is giving to hate each character)

taking care of others is a pain in the ass!- saying this as a reason kabru and mithrun shouldn't be together is basically saying disabled people shouldn't be allowed to have romantic relationships because they're a "burden"...if someone is actually willing to put in the work, then let them be.

that's not even all of their relationship, mithrun is the fighter of their duo and kabru would've been killed by the shapeshifter or something if he'd fallen down the hole on his own since he sucks at fighting monsters. mithrun helps collect ingredients for cooking every time, too (barometz fruits and griffin egg). he pulls his weight and then some!! i feel like people forget that part of mithrun a lot somehow.

+senshi literally cooks for everyone all time. it's kind of an important aspect of the narrative.

+also, while it is a popular fan thing I see around that kabru handfeeds mithrun, he literally never does lol this is mithrun using his own hands to eat:

also here we have him washing his own body

just saying because people like to treat mithrun like a baby even though the narrative respects him as a capable adult who also has special needs because of an accident. he’s captain for a reason

kabru hates taking care of mithrun!- not exactly, he was initially surprised and put off but got used to it quickly. i’m sure he’s grateful for all the times mithrun saved him from a monster and teleported them out of danger as well

he even starts doing “unnecessary” things for mithrun’s comfort and safety like when mithrun pushes himself too hard fighting, even after his mission to take care of him was complete when the canaries came back

here is even kabru resting while mithrun keeps watch (mithrun let him sleep for 5 hours before waking him up from the nightmare earlier, too):

there's nothing more to their relationship!- they actually have had a very tight and consistent dynamic since they met and they incite the most change within each other by the end. kabru is the one who inspires mithrun to create new desires so he doesn't waste away, and mithrun is the first person we see kabru being genuine with and it leads him to be more honest with others by the end instead of tiptoeing around everyone all the time (that mask was also the reason some ppl initially disliked kabru…)

kabru’s relationship with mithrun is honestly so important for his character and vice versa, but it’s often disregarded because of one over exaggerated aspect of it (an aspect that isn’t even the first way they interact with each other) or because people want to just straight up ignore it for some reason 🥲🥲

kui dedicates many panels to them that don't particularly serve the narrative as a whole in order to demonstrate this and i think that's pretty significant

you're taking this too seriously!- as if i'm the first person in the world to be crazy about a ship or the characters 😭 i love analyzing text and it's upsetting to see them mischaracterized when kui lays out the characters so clearly and deliberately

also they end up touching each other like all the time and have the kind of canon validation most ppl can only dream of lol i feel so insane look at this:

and this is just when they're first getting to know each other cuz there's a fuckload more

kinda hard to explain how i don't actually need them to get married or whatever but i'd die on this hill for them and i enjoy their dynamic immensely

haha you thought you were reading ship discourse but it was actually a character analysis 🤪🤪🤪

also don’t somehow take this to mean I think anyone has to ship them, I just need everyone to understand these accusations kind of don’t make sense especially when they can also apply to other pairs or characters

bonus kabru just looking at mithrun:

[starlos-soulmate]

Happy Marriage to Pancake and Starlo!

May these two fine the happiness and laughter in the next chapter of their lives. Through thick and thin, sickness and health, they're gonna stick together. Especially after what they had gone through before this moment.

The whole town arrived. This is the sheriff getting married after all! So many people wasn't expecting him to get married, to Pancake no less! The rivalry was a big part of the town's history, being tied to North Star himself, and seeing them get closer and closer was fun and kinda crazy. The whole town knew, and Pancake is married to Starlo. Feisty Four are also happy that they're married. And a few bets had to be paid.

Now they're off to the next chapter in their lives. And they still stick to each other like velcro.

more stuff under cut, like a lovesick rambling by me.

I have no idea why this guy chose me. Like, at all. I look at him, and that's my husband. I feel so oddly connected to him, and I've said this before, but he is someone I genuinely wanna marry. Starlo is my beloved, my soulmate, I love him so much, its insane that he picked me. Legit, it felt like he picked me all those months ago. Back in January. Does anyone remember when I was so happy with OTCore and the "2024 is the year of the robots?" Yeah, guess what happened XD

Starlo helped me in so many ways, keeping me sane through so much. Originally it was gonna happen on the six month anniversary, but I ended up being too tired. Regardless, I'M SO HAPPY TO DO IT NOW!!

I look at him and I melt. I just, I love him. He loves me. I have never felt this connected to ANY fictional character like this. Spamton came close, really close. But oh well.

This was a DOOZY! Spent like, four straight days working on this. And I'm so happy I did. The colored comic is a reference to this video. It fits so well cuz its something Starlo would say and, well, PANCAKE'S NAME!! And Starlo hasn't dated anyone at ALL, there's no way he was expecting to marry someone.

Also the gif wasn't supposed to be a gif! I was trying to make a more dynamic pose for Pancake, but I already had the other sketch made, so it turned into a gif. Makes it better imo. Also I'm not too happy with Pancake's outfit. The cape is also a poncho of sorts. ah well. im also too lazy to draw the Feisty Four and Clover after all the stuff i've drawn all of this.

but yeah i hope y'all enjoy!!

Comic Transcripts: Starlo: "I, Starlo Sunnyside, do take Pancake to be my waffle-y- lawfully"

Starlo: "and pancake-y" Pancake: Pfft-

Pancake: [Silent laughter]

Starlo: "I've been scared of this m'entire life" Pancake: "BWAAHAHAHAHAHAHA-" SECOND COMIC: Ceroba: "Well, congratulations Star. How do you feel getting married?"

Starlo: "Lucky..."

Tagging: @sparkyscissorhands @sparklings-husband @prismatica-the-strange @pinkdinkydoon @simonlynch

@snowpuffclovers @ghost--girlfriend @gibles-lovely-selfships @jocelynships @catships777

@wuffverine @patchw0rk-quilt @mrscage @dudeshusband @aego-philautia

@mandrakebrew @jils-things @gideongrovel @tieflingships @carnival-of-love

@faerie-circle-ships @rexscanonwife @lovelyheartclover @mrs-bluemarine @mephy-doodle-dandy

@kakusboyfriend @mashedpotatosinacup @heartmatic @bunbunsheart2 @cinnamon-phrog

@chalcanthitedreams @literally-just-there @halsinkisser @sheepie-self-ships @moondane-lovers

@bbyshifts @starlo-uty @galaxywolfshipper @signs-of-blossoming @maetheartist

[portraitofadyke]

I think Our Flag Means Death is a very unique show in a way that they don't care to cater to mainstream media. And yes, by mainstream media I mean the general straight people.

I think it's very important that we have feel-good shows like Heartstopper. A few years back, a tv show about two queer boys in high school would be unthinkable. But its plot generally revolves around explaining queerness. Sure, it's nice. It's definitely the show I would watch with my family if I were a teenager and wanted to come out again (I had to watch glee with my mom to do that. not optimal). It's the show where teenagers find love and themselves, but sexuality is constantly discussed, explained, sanitized. It's the show straight people will watch. And that's good. We do need shows like that.

But Our Flag Means Death doesn't even bother trying. It's a show about mostly middle aged people, most of them not white, most of them queer in one way or the other. It's really a game of spot the hetero, like someone said. And the characters are not sublte about it. They have sex for fun, something most characters don't have in tv shows, definitely not queer characters. They make dick jokes. They are not all conventionally attractive and they know it, and the writing doesn't care. They are all people before they are queer representation.

Stede's storyline in s1 is in a part about discovering himself and his sexuality, but it's not obnoxiously repeated. Instead, it's played in a natural way. Stede's storyline is ALL about finding himself, yet it's not just about that. Just like Ed's storyline, it's about toxic masculinity and allowing himself to have fine things and self-hatred and finding his place in a world, something most of us can relate to. Hell, none of us were even sure the main characters were going to kiss and end up together, we were all so sure it's a queerbait. But this show doesn't bait its audience. It's not afraid of weirdness. It embraces it instead. There is a nonbinary character. No, they are not a mermaid. Call them jim. That's it. Yes, Lucius and Pete got engaged. Everyone there knows what mateolage is, congrats. Olu and Jim never break up and then Archie shows up, then Zheng, and we all know. We all know.

Two men nearing fifty have a deep, romantic moment where one of them appears as a mermaid, and it's treated as the profound scene it is without ridiculing it. This would never fly in a 'mainstream' media. It would have to be downplayed. Here, it saves Ed's life.

The show tells you racists suck, but it doesn't tell you in a condescending, finger-waving way catered to the white people. Instead, it sets your ship aflame and burns you alive, runs a knife through your hand, puts poison in your drink and kills you.

This is a show for adults, for queer people of all kinds, and it does not give a fuck if anyone else gets it. It's so rare to find a tv show that caters to us, yet alone a tv show that's genuinely good and caring and so well loved.

This is a show that basically straightbaited its audience in the first season, that's how much they don't care.

Idk, I just feel that it will take ages for another show like OFMD to exist in a world full of MCU and media that tries so hard to be liked by everyone it loses its personality and charm. Rant over

[prescotted]

here is a huge and unnecessary post about josh and chris because i like to talk about them and i like to make huge metas for no reason: this was technically like five posts i just made into one, so enjoy, fam. some of the hyperlinks link to my writing blog's posts, those are also mine for reference.

i've always argued that josh and chris have this very strong bond. i want to start by saying i absolutely adore their friendship. i think it's so important overall to the story, so any inferences we receive are mostly probably by some artists on the team that can get away with it. especially with the remake, seeing fan reactions now, it wasn't hard to slip chris 4 josh in there but notice it's not like chris <3 josh or chris + josh, it's still sort of vague enough that like "yeah, i'm here for you, bro!" or "i like you". i think it's intentionally vague to affirm some but not really piss anyone else off. chris is a goofy guy, and also we now know that's josh's truck for sure. makes sense. it's been there a while.

i've talked about all of that in multiple different posts. if you want to read them: chris 4 josh which goes over other relationships with josh and how i see ships with him, etc, and also is more "fair" and less biased towards "climbing class" or what i now just call "chris 4 josh" (and subsequently all my ship tags now follow that for consistency) bc i kinda like that better? climbing class always was a little goofy for my tastes personally, but they are goofy, so it does work, but also ... there's no real connection between them and the climbing class line, it's just kind of a joke? but i get it, there's not a lot of content, but i am here to petition for chris 4 josh as the new ship name. also ... just kind of weird that jossam shippers don't call it "bathing bird" as their ship name? or actually thirty love is a better ship name tbh. go with that. thirty love. not my ship, but there are better names than jossam, i think.

how does everyone in the ud group know each other?

a question about why josh "victimizes chris" and how their relationship should be viewed more critically.

i think josh has other friend groups and the ud kids aren't his main posse, but chris is his best friend.

i've harped on and on about how chris is the main champion for josh's mental health ... that he is the one that truly knows "the most" about josh, despite josh lying to him, too. josh lies to everyone. he's never been really honest with people, always divulging a sort of half-truth or version of himself (his best self) for people to consume more easily.

also, let's give chris some credit here, because he gets shit on a lot for being so inactive in the basement scene.

but think about what he has gone through compared to, say, mike. shocking, right? because mike is doing so much! but what has mike been doing before all of this? before jessica gets taken? having a great fucking time. he's scaring his friends, having snowball fights, getting catty in the lodge with matt if you choose to do-so or just watching his two love interests have at it, jokes with jess all the way there, has a scary moment and runs, then gets to try and fuck her all before getting into his more serious character arc. this is all purposeful, i'm not mad at mike for this. we need this to happen to him, right? to show that he's actually super capable, cares, and will go the distance. mike is the man you want going after you, no question. he is insane for going so hard after jessica, and continuing to pursue onward instead of going back. insane in a good way. i can see why he thinks he can be president.

but chris ... by comparison? not going so great. he's worried about josh, he's already had to climb over the wall before sam, has had to encourage sam to come, has to assuage her this is a good idea, all while trying to check in on josh, trying to have fun, trying to be a good guy with ashley, trying to be the funny guy, having to go through the lodge because josh told him to with a lighter, gets attacked by a wolverine, gets made fun of all while trying to be fun about it himself, goes through the whole ouija thing, goes through the whole basement thing, goes through the saw choice, goes through trying to find sam, goes through having to choose between himself and ashley, goes through josh's reveal, goes through having to tie josh up, goes through having to go back for josh as the only one willing to do so, sees josh might be gone and dead, sees the stranger die, gets attacked, and then almost dies before he gets to the basement? he is honestly exhausted. let someone else have the trauma stick. it's not his time anymore. he deserves to be more inactive towards the end. he just carried the game for us.

but josh cares for chris, chris cares for josh. i won't repeat all my other metas because this is a new meta.

when chris is told that josh's body can't be recovered? he's all but about to cry. he's had to lose josh so many times. he really thought josh might pull it out of the hat again just one last time. that he could be alive.

i've mentioned i think for the remake both endings for sam and josh are just outright lame. josh because it detracts from his narrative, sam because it's just plot holes for days and is unnecessary. as a roleplayer or fanfic writer? good stuff, mostly for josh, but as an actual game that isn't catering to the 1-10% of roleplayers and fanfic writers out there? bad decision. josh deserves redemption, but the horror of it all is that he cannot achieve it, instead being consumed by the same thing that consumed his sister(s). josh is doomed by the narrative more than anyone else because the narrative is mostly his story and the story of his family. you're not there for any reason other than josh as the player, he's called us here so we have answered his call (to greatness).

in the beta, josh outright denies sam, who is outright coming onto him. this isn't a sam comparison post btw, that's not what this is. but in the beta, he's still very devoted to chris, even more openly kind of too much. in the game we get, that angle is sort of scrapped entirely. josh and sam have their dynamic, chris and josh are best friends, sam and chris seemed to have some implied thing (ik i write her as a lesbian but i am a slave to canon, folks, chris could very well have been her intended love interest lmao), and chris likes ashley, and thus ashley likes chris. we get a structure of intentional coupling: josh and sam are single, ash and chris are the will they / won't they, and then we have the other four paired together kind of interchangeably (ik matt and jess aren't canon, but there's kind of an implied history with how easily they go after each other, at least in a friend way). this helps not isolate non-couple players. it's a game mechanic thing.

but what's interesting is how josh, who has a lot of front-facing conversations with chris, looks at him?

he's always got a kind of ... i don't want to say tenderness, but definitely a more authentic way of being, even when acting. he is acting to these kids as himself, which is why josh is so believable. josh plays josh very well.

he's looking at chris. in the original, it's the same, but much harder to see (model placement, camera placement, lighting, shading, etc). here, it's much more upfront and obvious, even without my psd. josh looks chris up and down, bites his lip, and nods. that's a very specific way to look at someone. i'll leave that up to you to interpret.

and just more pics of josh smiling at chris i guess.

to me, i think josh probably liked chris, felt it wasn't received, encouraged him to date ashley, got mad about it, then got mad at chris for still liking ashley even after the prank, and sort of maybe punished him a bit for that but mostly made chris "his hero" for "his movie". you don't make someone your hero without really having an infinity for them, romantic or not.

chris has always valued josh as his highest even seeing him at his lowest. saying josh isn't on his meds if you don't find all the right clues isn't something was in hannah's diary, that is something chris knows about josh.

i think chris has come to the closest to knowing the real josh. he's the only one, i think, who notices when he's gone.

josh's sexuality is a whole other post, but i always tend to (when i play) go with "women make me uncomfortable" based on how he acts with his sisters, sam, ashley, chris, mike, matt, emily, and jess respectively. but in theory, the option 'men make me uncomfortable' is also correct (and canon). in short: everyone makes josh uncomfortable.

when josh tells chris to shut up and chris just does, i think that really should tell us what we need to know.

josh is great to goof with, but don't piss him off. chris knows to listen to josh if josh is being serious with him ... because josh is never serious about anything.

chris will submit to josh's more forceful will and doesn't seem to really care if josh basically demeans him (too much, there's a limit, chris isn't a total pushover or anything). it's not a nice way to tell your friend to be quiet, no one likes being told to shut up (in a non-playful way).

he's likely also being gracious to josh because of the situation. chris is more willing to "take it" from josh in that way because josh is going through a lot. i don't think josh is outright mean to chris, he doesn't bully him too bad (just calls him a big boy and teases him), but josh can act kind of stressed out sometimes, which i think chris accepts and tries to sort of help josh "feel better" through ... but can't really do anything about it. he's not in that position. he's just his friend. what can he do?

josh and chris have codependency, but chris and josh act very autonomously outside of each other. josh doesn't need chris to help him with the prank, he does that alone. chris doesn't need josh to spend time with ashley, he does that a lot by himself, likely a point of contention, and also awkward when the three of them hang (yet somehow kind of cool, because they keep doing it).

i would argue "josh needs chris more than chris needs josh" ... on the surface. when looking at their relationship, chris i think very much sees himself as needing josh. josh, for him, was a cooler "older kid" who arguably isn't even that much older (chris only moved ahead one grade, he's literally the same age as sam and hannah and beth, like), but when you're that age, even a year feels like a lifetime. josh provides chris a confidence in himself he cannot seem to achieve on his own ... until josh pushes him to. just like josh pushes chris to achieve confidence with ashley in the game, something josh himself says that chris needs.

for josh, chris is what keeps him "normal". things aren't so bad when his friend is around. so he needs him around all the time to keep things from not getting bad.

josh has all these things going on: rich kid, mentally ill, incidents at school, a sort of semi-unstable home life in the sense that i describe his parents as very "presently absent" or "absently present" depending on how you think about it ig. they are there but they are not. josh has them but he doesn't. he's always had his sisters, though, and then they're not there, so he has chris, because chris has always been there, and he can't have anything happen to him, right? that would just make josh fall apart.

but he clearly loves his sisters more than anything: josh was planning to "join them", so he was prepared to leave chris behind, something that chris struggles with. if josh dies, what will he do?

chris is inherently, in my mind, stronger than josh. he can withstand more than josh can while remaining sound, logical, and stable. josh is great in normal situations, but not in bad ones. chris is good at keeping josh from falling apart, but he's just one guy, and josh's problems are bigger than them.

and actually, last part about chris and josh, because i didn't even feel like it was worth mentioning directly but i guess i realized this matters a lot to people's view: their stats.

josh and chris always have the highest stats with each other basically no matter what you do. sure, they can drop a bit if you choose ash over josh because josh will remember that, but ... it's very marginal by comparison to how drastically relationships (and traits) can change.

but josh is always the highest stat for chris and chris for josh (chris 4 josh, you could say).

okay, that's actually a little unfair: what i should say is generally chris views ash and josh pretty similarly, which is interesting on its own, but for josh, chris is his highest stat.

viewing josh and ash the same is actually a major contention point for josh, i think. how can chris view her so highly so quickly (perceived to josh as quickly, it's dependent on how long you think ashley has known them) by comparison to josh ... who has been there since he was like 8. that's just tough to swallow, no matter what context you put on it or derive. that hurts josh. chris isn't meaning to hurt him.

because this is a choice-based game, ashley can actually have a better relationship with chris than josh. i'm not here to go against chris/ash, btw. generally, i find them cute together, i think there's a lot to be said, and i view it fairly. i'm also a huge ashley/josh shipper as well as i like them as an ot3, so my tastes are all over, but looking just at the game and not at my feelings ...

chris is very conflicted on how important he needs to value ashley to him as someone he wants to be with romantically and josh to him as someone he likely is viewing a lot as an older brother / best friend, whereas josh views chris differently (you decide - romantic, almost like family he's losing now to ashley, losing his bestie, whatever, it's different for josh). to chris, he's very stable in how he feels about josh, which explains why really it's what happens to josh or what josh does (not a lot in-game lbr) to chris (as josh, not his persona) that can sway chris. with ashley, it's all over the place, they have such an intentional up-and-down dynamic. it's for us to decide if they get together, that's part of their trope (will they, won't they).

josh is feeling like a third wheel here. it's his house half the time, and he's the third wheel? ouch.

also, i accept this, too: this game is glitchy. many people have reported doing something as ashley and like her honesty will go up for some and down for others and they capture it and it's there as both, so what do we do with that?

for me, just as a writer, that is all game mechanics. i guess it's good insight? but it's messy, hard to keep up with, and not the best imo. it's great for a game! bad for us when the game glitches. but also, again, i think it just shows how people can react to others, how your choices are making a difference, etc.

this is kind of why i don't eff with the stats too much tbh. it's just (to me) not sound proof. if it was, more people would comment that sam's stats are super low with everyone, lowest with mike and jess likely bc they got together and it's in bad taste, and like ... that speaks to me.

additionally, i don’t think chris just submits to josh all the time — he isn’t afraid to like, kind of stand up for himself, but you can tell especially in that year between and coming back he’s more compliant so josh can have a good time. josh denies chris asking if he’s okay, telling him not to do that (something chris probably does a lot). if josh wants to indulge “like they used to”, then chris will oblige him. he lets josh shut him down fast, then tell him what to do (i love game mechanic josh lmao do this so i can do this ok?) — chris isn’t necessarily josh’s submissive but josh is the dominant one between them generally. he calls the shots, he’s the cool one, he’s the older bro trope.

[vivid-bad-brainrot]

Fav vbs ship?

I would say polysquad but that's too easy so I guess if I had to rank vbs ships itd look like this ^^

And I'll give explanations cause I feel like yapping

🥇Touan!!! ☕️🎧

TOUAN. My love for this pairing goes so deep I am the sole admin for @timelytouan over or Twitter. I'm. A little insane. Bro their dynamic is everything to me its not even funny. I think they have a really wholesome relationship /p and /r and i think its really sweet for an to be such a big proponent of touya getting new experiences and especially watching their relationship grow as the game progresses and seeing the two of them develop an understandingof eachother!!! I've written about 40k words of touan fanfic in total....my little eebies AND DONT GET ME STARTED ON TOUAN PARALLELS. I could do a separate post yammering about that since An and Touya truly are two sides of the same coin

• "we're teammates, so when you're happy, i wanna be happy with you. And when you're sad i wanna console you,or maybe even cry with you!"

• "hehe, you really have changed a lot, touya. Before, i could never tell what you were thinking at all!"

"if we're saying that, isn't it more impressive that you've learnt to understand me?"

🥈Anhane🎧🐹

Anhane is so.....anhane....*wipes tear* I finished writing a 15k words long anhane fic last night so my passion for these two is very strong. I think Anhane is a ship that is prone to misconception especially in the way some people characterize An—how some people just see her as Kohane obsessed and water down her character just to that (the way i see it is that Kohane is a BUFFER to everything that makes An who she is!!! Again. Another rant for another time) While Anhane's dynamic isn't the first of its kind, it really goes deep!! The mutual importance to eachother is so precious to me.... Kohane who was given the chance to grow into her best self and An who gets to gets to share her love of music and Vivid Street. With An's crippling abandonment issues ESPECIALLY regarding kohane, anhane is a ship that is SO fun to play around with wherein it gives you the best fluff and angst....anhane so good

🥉. Akikoha 🥞🐹

Akikoha is one of those ships where I will randomly get hit by the most severe brainrot of my life for a few days and then be fine but have to live under constant threat of gettjng killed by akikoha cuteness... akikoha is just so cute man!!! Disecting them down to a deeper level, I really love how they complement eachother in their world views and how they approach things!! They both admire eachother so much!!! With Akito and Kohane, they seem really different from wachother but all they want to do is prove themselves!!! I also love to see akito hyping kohane up!!! Good stuff!!!

• "Look, there's always gonna be haters. Don't let it get to you. If it bothers you so much what people say about us, shut them up with an awesome performance. Like that other time. Keep your chin high and show them how awesome you are. Anyway, An's really late. Let's go inside. Besides, this way our sensitive member won't have to listen to some guys badmouthing us while they wait for the gig"

"Um... Was Akito being considerate towards me just now?" (LMAOOO 😭😭😭😭)

4. Akian 🥞🎧

Whether you like them romantically or not can we just talk about how banger their dynamic is???? Their constant bickering makes them so fun!! An and Akito have known eachother since middle school and probably met some time after RAD WEEKEND when Akito would sing on the street and catch wind of An. I think this plays in to not only their deep friendship but also their rivalry!! The two of them indirectly helped eachother through their loneliness 🥺🥺 An found comfort in Akitos voice simply being there!! Then we obviously have akitos deep understanding of an (although generally he's just very perceptive of the people around him!! Don't forget!!!) We see in sis bfby and kiuan where akito is able to see RIGHT THROUGH an and call her out on her shit! That familiarity means so much to the both of them and I think their dynamic is SO sweet what the hell man!!! Guys akian is so peak EVERY VBS PAIRING IS SO PEAK

5. Toukoha ☕️🐹

EVERYTIME SOMEONE CALLS TOUKOHA BORING AN ANGEL LOSES ITS WINGS 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 NO ONE GETS THEM 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 NO ONE DESERVES TOUKOHA 😭😭😭😭 anyways toukoha get shoved aside alot as the quiet ones of vbs when. Guys. Thes mfs are YAPPERS. Touya and Kohane's autism sync up like Bluetooth. If you want to be enlightened on toukoha I EMPLORE you to go read take the best shot....do it for them.... I wish they had more in game content there's not even alot of them in card stories which is sad because that's usually where u can find the most content for vbs pairings outside of ahn/akty 💔💔💔 I think their dynamic in vbs main story is really interesting....... if you think toukoha is lame YOU are lame 🫵🫵🫵

5. Akitoya

Guys I LOVE akitoya very much they are SOULMATES but I put them down here because I think about them the least (i am biased towards women. Off topic but shoutout to girltouya) and don't trust myself to write an analysis of them 😭😭😭 but I really do love them they are very cute

I know people (at least from my experience in vbs communities) get really defensive over ships so remember that I ADORE all of these ships and brainrot all of them

[vi-gilante-1010]

The beauty of timebomb as a ship for me before season 2 was that it was doomed to never work out. Jinx and Ekko were so close as kids, they pranked enforcers and built things together and had that childhood crush that's so powerful at the time because it's your first ever crush. But they grew into such opposite people. Jinx devolved into a self-serving maniac that bombed and attacked for her own fun and for the people she cared about, while Ekko became someone who fights for the safety of all Zaun, saddled with a sense of responsibility to build a life that people could feel safe in. Ekko builds to heal, while Jinx builds to destroy. They're opposites, but they once mattered so much to each other. Ekko is the one person from her childhood she didn't kill because she pushed him away. Powder is the one he had to watch due before his eyes in her transformation to Jinx. It's tragic and it's beautiful and it's the epitome of season 1's tragedy: it's what could've been.

Then season 2 arc 3 came and well. It's a little less beautiful now. Introducing some alternate universe that blames the arcane magic for everything that went wrong, but simultaneously shows peace and prosperity as gentrification, with all of Zaun's uniqueness and culture eradicated and absorbed by Piltover culture. And it's in this world where Timebomb is canon. It could happen, if only she'd lost her sister earlier! If only Silco hadn't been a revolutionary! And then Ekko, without much explanation, beelines for Jinx. Not for the tree he was supposedly trying to save, not for his unnamed friends, not even for Jayce's lab. He goes to Jinx. And he saves her- off screen, of course, can't have the actual heartfelt connection between them happen in front of the audience- and they paint all over each other and go to fight Ambessa, because gotta have them in the fight, I guess. And then she "dies" anyway, which does double down on the 'they're doomed' idea but forgets the reason why they were doomed in the first place. She'd MURDERED plenty of Fire lights, his friends, his allies. And we're just forgetting all that because the All Problems Are Solved au Powder danced with him in a pretty dress? Sure, yeah, okay, whatever.

The tree, Ekko's safe haven he'd worked so hard to build, the Fire lights as a whole are forgotten by the narrative. At best, they and the Jinxers are treated like one and the same by the end, which is silly because they should for all intents and purposes be rivals, if not flat out enemies. The tragedy is altered to be more palatable because look, they still live each other after all this time! But it severely waters down Ekko's resolve as a character and makes his growth contingent on her, yet also maintains the part where he's solely responsible for the future of Zaun and the safety of everyone by having him force himself to the brink to kill Viktor, and then he's alone. Alone, with no friends. The Fire lights were never valued enough by the narrative to have names. His and VI's relationship is completely dropped from season 2 as a whole. Jinx and Heimerdinger both fake their deaths and abandon him. We don't see the safe haven he poured his life into, we didn't see whether the tree survived or not. All we get is Ekko, alone on a roof in Zaun. The only Zaunite to not leave or die.

This was originally a timebomb post. But damn if Ekko wasn't done dirty. It's like everything he did was for nothing, and not even in a way that's tragic but satisfying to the narrative. We don't get to see the end results of either of the major points in his arc. We never find out what happened to the tree. We don't see him reconnect with Jinx. News flash, season 2: in order to cry 'show don't tell' for your characters, you have to actually show stuff. "Show don't tell" + "intentional omission" = "really well-animated nothing burger"

(This post was initially written before the timebomb MV. So I wanna go on record and say that that MV didn't help at all. I think it's a nice MV, but it makes Jinx's choice to disappear more confusing by doubling down on Ekko being her safe place, and is unequal in that it's all about Jinx's feelings and how Ekko is her saviour. Not a fan. And if that's supposed to be the reconnection of Jinx and Ekko, then why didn't we actually get that in the show? Bonus content is bonus; you shouldn't have to have it for the story to feel satisfying.)

[dindjarindiaries]

What about

“You’re not alone, baby. You never have been.”

With Hunter? I’m so glad you’re interested in writing for him right now. He’s my favorite!

character: Hunter (The Bad Batch)

prompt: “You’re not alone, baby. You never have been.”

main masterlist • hunter masterlist

It felt good to be helping someone again, and that's what you dwelled upon as you and Wrecker laughed with the clone cadets in the cockpit of the Marauder. They had been curious about some of Wrecker's wartime stories, and both he—and you, as a long-time honorary member of the squad—had decided to tell your most fond memories. Most of those involved laughs, usually centered on the pure chaos of each story.

But the absence of one was felt heavily, particularly for you. There was a cold chill in the place of the empty chair alongside you, and when you tore your gaze away from Wrecker and the boys, you saw Hunter bent over Tech's old datapad yet again. Your lips pulled tight, and your fingers tapped against your crossed arms.

You didn't want to admit it, but he had only been getting worse as time went on.

It wasn't unusual for Hunter to be in his lonesome. As the squad leader, he often took it upon himself to seek isolation and focus on planning ahead. His enhanced senses made isolation even more tempting for him.

This isolation, however, was different. Losing Crosshair what felt like cycles ago was bad enough. Echo's departure was understood by everyone, but hard to digest. Then, all at once, it was Tech and Omega.

Hunter didn't have to tell you about the burdens on his shoulders. It was clear in the way he carried himself. As the person he left himself be the most vulnerable with, you saw it more than anyone else could.

No doubt sensing your eyes on him, Hunter's gaze rose and met yours for a moment. As if it was too much for him, he cut his eyes away, setting down the datapad on the station and rising from his chair. He disappeared behind the curtain of Omega's room, yet again shutting himself away.

That time, you weren't letting it slide.

You brushed your hand over Wrecker's shoulder to catch his attention. He stopped another fit of laughter to look at you, and you gestured with your head to the back of the ship. Wrecker's brow knit together as he nodded in understanding, and your shared gaze said enough. He would have no trouble entertaining your guests as the Marauder made its way to Pabu.

You kept your footsteps light as you closed the distance to Omega's room. Still, Hunter would sense your approach. Whatever you could do to make it easier for him, though, you would. Forcing him into overstimulation wouldn't help to accomplish that goal.

You drew the curtain aside and climbed the rungs of the ladder. Making sure the curtain was closed behind you, you pushed ahead, peering around the corner of the interior hull to see Hunter sitting on Omega's old bed. His knees were drawn up to his chest as the back of his head rested against the hull, his eyes closed—but not in a peaceful way.

He exhaled as he sensed your presence, his eyes remaining closed even as he spoke in a low voice. "I'm sorry."

You raised your brow at him. "For what?"

Hunter's eyes opened before he rolled his head to the side and faced you. There was a distress so prominent in his brown eyes that it made your chest ache with a resounding pang. "You and Wrecker were having fun. Smiling, laughing even." The corners of his mouth pulled up only for a moment at the thought of your joy. "I didn't mean to ruin it."

You frowned at him. "You didn't ruin it, Hunter."

Hunter huffed, a self-deprecating sound as he rolled his head back to where it had been before. His fingers fumbled with each other as he went on. "I need to start making use of these private spaces again. I've... gotten too comfortable thinking out in the open."

You started to scoot yourself closer to him. "Because you have the space to. There's no reason to be on your own."

Hunter's gaze was cast upwards and it stayed there, even as you watched his jaw work for a few moments. "I left Crosshair on his own. I let the Empire get away with Omega. And I ordered Tech to..."

Hunter didn't have to finish that thought, and he couldn't if he wanted to. You watched as his eyes squeezed closed again, his chest inflating with a breath he held as his lips pressed together and his jaw circled. You brought yourself close enough to his side to take one of his gloved hands and lace it with yours, resting them on your thigh as you waited patiently for him.

"I may not have a reason to be on my own, but I deserve to be." Hunter reopened his eyes, revealing the tears that sat stubbornly on his waterline. Your body nearly trembled in your grief for him as he went on. "I'm alone with these decisions I made." He swallowed hard, making the lump in his throat even more visible to you. "I always will be."

You lifted your free hand to the side of his face furthest from you, gently turning his cheek to make you face him again. His devastation threatened to ruin you, but you kept yourself strong for his sake, offering him a refuge with a smile to light the end of his dark tunnel. "You're not alone, baby." Your voice was hushed, barely a whisper as your fingertips ran over his cheek. "You never have been." You brushed some of the wisps of hair away from his bandana. "And you never have to be."

Hunter paused, and you knew him well enough to recognize that he was using his senses to detect a lie. When he came up with nothing but the truth, he rested his forehead against yours in relieved surrender. "I know the responsibility I hold. I will never shy away from it. But, this... these burdens..." his voice lowered to a broken yet honest whisper as he finished, "I need help carrying them."

You cupped his jaw and ran your thumb over his skin. "You never had to carry them on your own, Hunter." You nodded at him. "We want to help." You gave his hand that you still held a squeeze. "I want to help."

Hunter searched your gaze before he returned your nod, his tensed shoulders beginning to loosen as he whispered his genuine gratitude upon your lips. "Thank you."

Your kiss was slow and soft, taking its time in the very same way Hunter would with his share of these burdens. You kept him close, reminding him of how you would always be there—and not needing a single word to do so. His free hand snuck around the back of your neck to pull you closer, a gentle plea for you to stay close. It was an order you were more than happy to take from him.

When you parted, Hunter began to smile, a gesture you hadn't seen on him in much too long. You raised your brow and already felt your lips spreading wide in your own grin before he explained himself. "You know, uh... nobody's ever called me that."

You furrowed your brow at his sudden shyness as his cheeks began to redden. "Called you what?"

Hunter's gaze fell to your entwined hands as he gently began to knead his within your own. The smile wouldn't leave his lips as he repeated the endearment with an adorable awkwardness. "'Baby.'"

You relaxed your brow. "Oh." You softly nudged his shoulder to gain his attention once again. "Well, do you like it?"

Hunter waited a beat before nodding, his face reddening even more at the confession.

You let out a soft laugh. "Then it's settled." You lifted your entwined hands to your lips and kissed his gloved knuckles. "It's you and me, baby."

Hunter rested his forehead against your temple and closed his eyes in sweet relief. "You and me."

[sexiestpodcastcharacter]

Sexiest Podcast Character 2024 — Scripted Undefeated Bracket — Round 4

Propaganda

Renée Minkowski (Wolf 359):

But. MINKOWSKI. Please read all that Minkowski propaganda I wrote and then consider voting for her. She's the love of my life and THE sexiest podcast woman, bar none.

MINKOWSKI

Mabel Martin (Mabel):

​Let’s go Mexican lesbian who worships her gf like a catholic saint, ate glass one time, & can never escape her childhood home or the inevitability of love no matter how hard she tries. 🗣️🗣️🗣️

MABEL NATION STAY STRONG WE WILL PREVAIL

Additional propaganda below the cut:

Renée Minkowski (Wolf 359):

the most badass commander there is. she spent a week hunting a plant monster living on the air ducts of her station with a goddamn harpoon. she managed to keep her people alive and get them home. she managed to keep Eiffel alive for like five years and for that alone she deserves a fucking medal

She did not just spend one week hunting the plant monster, she spent TWO WEEKS hunting the plant monster. Later on, she used the very same harpoon to murder an evil capitalist WHILE SHE HAD A BULLET IN HER CHEST.

She's haunted by the memory of the first time she took a life, and what's sexier than a character with regrets?

She works out. Muscle women. Enough said.

She's devoted to protecting her crew above all else, and despite her self-doubt, she's REALLY damn good at it.

She's a theater kid! She loves musicals! She writes showtunes! Sondheim is her favorite composer!

She Russian-Roulettes a guy into not blowing up her ship, and does such a good job of it that he never even realizes there aren't any bullets in her gun.

She's been trapped in a time loop, possibly multiple times.

She's the best character in all of audio drama, I love her, she's beautiful, she's sexy, and she deserves every vote.

#minkowski my beloved. love of my life. other half of my heart. sexiest woman in podcast ever. i love her

#MINKOWSKI!!!!!! #i love her sooo much fun fact

#my girl! my favorite girl! she won! #let's keep this energy going everyone!

I don't really remember anything about Wolf 359 since I only listened to a few episodes so I'm throwing my lot in with whoever has the most compelling/funniest propaganda. I think this would be funny and I commit to nothing if not the bit

This is propaganda for all the female characters. Voters please remember how pretty all women are and factor that into every single vote you make. Thank you.

Mabel Martin (Mabel):

I haven't listened to Mabel yet but I liked how far she got last year.

#MABEL <3

#VOTE MABEL MARTIN BEFORE I BLOW UP THIS ENTIRE BUILDING

#Mabel Martin Is Sexy 2025

#she’s sexy and intense and I love her to bits

#MABEL!!!

#Mabel Martin of course you would win#she's just an unsettling faelike lesbian

#mabel!!!!! #the girl ouroboros herself #feral fae child latina godling. what else do i need to say

This is propaganda for all the female characters. Voters please remember how pretty all women are and factor that into every single vote you make. Thank you.

[a-kinda-boring-writer]

hi i’m new here and i would like to know what you like about brightfire! never seen that ship before and i love hearing about peoples beloved niche ships

Hi, hello! 👋 Welcome to the kitty corner of The Hellsite(tm)

I'm quite sorry for taking two whole day to organize my thoughts 😔. I'm really bad at discussing ships I like. Or ships in general tbh.

Anyways, not surprised at all lol. Brightheart fanships are kinda rare as is, I feel (the fandom loves BrightCloud way too much lol. The most experimental they ever get is adding Swiftpaw or Daisy into the mix). BrightFire must be the nichest thing ever. More of a crackship tbh. There are like three people in the universe who ship BrightFire, we all used to be in the same discord server, and each of us had a different, mutually incompatible interpretation of their dynamic lmao.

Last time someone asked me about one of my fav ships, I couldn't really give them a good answer, and I felt really shit about it. So I'll do my best and I hope it's at least amusing to hear my thought process?

This is probably going to be long and I'm going to explain myself like ass, because I always end up rambling unnecessarily 😔.

Alright:

To be honest, for me, it originally came about as a joke, while writing my PoT-AU rewrite. The main premise of that is that Holly, Jay, and Lion are FeatherCrow kits born in RiverClan, but a fun... gimmick, I guess you'd call it, of that AU is that I strive to research and implement community-wide headcanons and jokes new and old (or just wc fandom practices in general) taken seriously to craft the world-building, plot and characterization of some cats. For example, Leafpool in the AU started as a warrior but was forced to become a med cat by Sandstorm (old fandom rumor based on jack and shit afaik) and she's very pro-life (very strange fandom discourse turned into shitposts gallore from 2019... also, yeah, abortions are a thing that exist in that AU).

Here in Tumblr, Firestar x Everyone is rather popular, so that's part of his character in the AU. That's to say, he's a disaster, with 2 mates, 12 lovers, like 100 flings and 24 litters of kits fathered and counting! (don't worry, the large majority of them died young, so despite his best efforts, he didn't nuked the clans' genetic diversity.... yet).

Anyways, the joke (and pre-phrasing this by saying that I think infidelity in fiction is funny to begin with, and that I don't like Cloudtail. At all). I thought that it'd be hilarious if Firestar, considering his new behaviors, got so annoyed at his nephew one day that he just goes and cucks him. That's it. Incredibly stupid, I know.

Then I started thinking about the ship a bit more, outside of the context of that AU. And I kinda ended up really liking the idea of BrightFire? Firestar is just really easy to ship lol. And as I said, I do not like Cloudtail. So pairing Brightheart up with someone else was an intriguing proposition.

I haven't had the time to sit and write down about it properly, so the following is very tenuous at best. I'm aware this is more of a crackship, so I'm under no illusion that it makes perfect sense within canon or anything like that. Also, this is only ONE scenario I have for BrightFire, the one I've put the most thought, and it takes place on the second part of TNP.

Pre-phrasing this by saying that I don't write my romances as entirely healthy, so if anything sounds lowkey 🤨 then yeah, it's probably meant to be.

The way I see it, Brightheart derives way too much of her self-worth from other cats' feelings and opinions about her. In canon, it's mainly Cloudtail's. One of the guides states something along the lines of "she still remembers what she looked like before the dog attack, and it breaks her heart every time she sees her reflection, she just puts up a brave front and avoids going near water". Bright herself adds that "He gave me another destiny, and I knew that no matter what I looked like, I would be all right. As long as Cloudtail loved me, I was no longer Lostface, but Brightheart". Which I'm sure most people would interpret that as something cute, that's what it was meant as probably, but I'm not most people lol. (bad faith interpretations strike again 🫠)

There are other examples of that stuff within the main books themselves, but those 👆 illustrate the idea already. I don't feel like hunting for screenshots right now.

So, with that in mind, when Cloudtail started neglecting her, favoring spending time with Daisy instead of her... not to mention that Bright had recently lost her home and also had to leave her mother behind to an unknown fate, so she might have been in a vulnerable state as is... I'd imagine she took it really hard.

And to clarify, I'm NOT saying that Cloud was being neglectful on purpose or that he had feelings for Daisy and wanted to replace his wife or anything like that (I think he was just being well-meaning but clueless... and a little dumb perhaps), just that to Bright, it certainly seemed that way.

So in an alternative universe in which Leafpool doesn't step in and chew out Cloudtail to get it together, it's Firestar who intervenes in this situation. But he doesn't go to Cloud, his nephew never listens to him anyways. He goes to Brightheart instead. He doesn't understand what's going on at first, he only knows that she's been moping around in the med cat den a little too much, and he really needs all warriors locked in. They just moved to the lake and there's a lot of work to be done.

He learns what's going on and feels sympathy towards her. He too knows what's like to feel alone even when surrounded by clanmates, and to be neglected by those who you hold dear, those who you thought you had a special connection with (he's still not over his situationship with Graystripe and getting dumped for Silverstream lmaooo)

Firestar cuts her some slack and lets her skip her duties until she feels better. He also starts periodically visiting her, to spend time with her and cheer her up, just like he did with Cinderpelt. He feels responsible in a way, because Cloud is his kin and he (unintentionally) caused this mess.

Brightheart is apathetic at first. But she ends up latching onto him, because she has no one else (Cinderpelt is too busy to spend time with her, dealing with Leafpool's shenanigans and, well, her own upcoming doom. And her brothers... sorry, who?) Over time, Brightheart sort of inadvertently starts getting from Firestar's company and kinds gestures the same validation she used to derive from Cloudtail's.

Eventually, Bright fells well enough to return to her duties, and though things are better, she tries to avoid going on patrols with Cloud. She really doesn't want to know how awesome Daisy is doing in her training or how great her kits are 🙄. And that's all Cloud seems to think about these days. She feels like he compliments her far less nowadays, and even when he does, it sounds kinda hollow.

Instead, she often ends up going on patrols that, coincidentally, Firestar is in (Fire also thinks that Cloud is annoying, so he doesn't put him in his patrols lmao). And they just keep hanging out, as clanmates. Soon they do as friends. And it's his jokes that make her laugh now, and his compliments that causes her to trip over her words.

And when she realizes what's happening, it startles her, causes her to feel really guilty... but it causes her to reevaluate some things. She needs to be loved to be Brightheart, to not be Lostface, to not be dead-weight. And she simply doesn't anymore with Cloudtail. She thought their bond unbreakable, but as soon as someone prettier showed up, he seemed more than ready to drop her. And that sucks because she has a family with him, and so many plans, and so much of her life and future plans were build around him. She doesn't want to throw all that away.

But she feels loved around Firestar. And she needs to feel loved. She's been doing so much better since they've began hanging out. He makes her feel strong, like Cloud used to do. And she's rebuilt her life once. She could do it again...

Firestar has no fucking clue that he's essentially driving a wedge between Cloud and Bright.

(We're going with the fanon-ish funny characterization of Firestar, in which he's handsome, charismatic and very charming, but incredibly clueless. You know, needing Cinderpelt to spell it out for him when Sandstorm wanted to put a ring on it, and all that)

He just sees that Brightheart responds well to what he does, so he keeps doing it. He invites her to share some fresh-kill with him and Sandstorm, and while they eat, he slips in that her fur looks lovely today. Then he pats himself on the back when Bright smiles, and offers to go on another patrol with him. Man, he's just so great at supporting his clanmates! 😌

(In a "Sandstorm is ok with it" scenario, I like to think that Firestar wouldn't understand what's going on until his wife quite literally asks him 'So are you going to invite that woman you've been courting to our nest already, or do you expect me to do it?', with him replying something like "the woman I've been WHAT?")

From that set up, you can take it anywhere, really. Bright keeps quiet and continues with her marriage, for the sake of her daughter. She tries to pursue an affair with Fire and is rejected. She tries to pursue an affair with Fire and he agrees for [insert reason here]. Bright just divorces Cloud publicly and goes for Fire, either getting rejected or not. Or from this event, Bright learns to love herself, without needing others for validation, and it doesn't matter with who she ends up with anymore... or she should yolo it and just marry Daisy, fuck it.

Happy endings are kinda few and far between in my stories lol, but I have a soft spot for BrightFire. I wanna see them happy-ish in the end (Sandstorm too!). Need time to actually think about it, though.

Anyways, yeah. Hope you got something interesting out of this?

<3

[elainsgirl]

no cause im actually getting annoyed.

gwyn this. gwyn that. like please shut up. we barely know anything about this girl and you're talking about her being an auntie? her saving the world? not to mention they always block out emerie which is very weird.

Hey anon 🫶

Lmfao, you’re feelings are so valid & relatable.

The only reason Gwyn Berdara has become so huge is the fact she is used as a self-insert LI for Azriel. That is the root of her mainstream popularity. And its sad how much of her character has become interwined with Azriels when this poor girl has shown 0 romantic interest in him. She’s being thust into a “love triangle” when she hasn’t even shown any interest in the guy- it just goes to show how her “stans” love her for the fact she can replace Elain.

Gwyn was your standard side character. We got her backstory like with Emerie. Both helped Nesta in her journey, both had focus on them - the difference being Gwyn had magic and Emerie doesn’t. but why has Emerie been so overshadowed by Gwyn? Bcs Gwyn is linked to a man. Sad isn’t it. and thats just the ugly truth.

this isn’t me saying the *only* reason Gwyn is so liked is due to her being Azriel’s theorised mate. People loved her strength, bravery, vulnerability, the openness in which she accepted Nesta etc etc. She would have had the same level of popularity as other side characters,

Yet she’s quite literally shoved down everyones’ throats all because she is shipped with Azriel. Its come to the fact - this whole gwynriel propaganda has overshadowed the point and focus of the story - which has always been the archeron sisters.

Gwyn will wield Gwydion. She will help with the prison - not Elain who is literally is linked with life and regrowth, who has used TT right - nope. Its Gwyn. Gwyn will become Rhysands bestie, Gwyn will be the new IC member, Gwyn will help Nesta rule etc etc. And its all so sadly funny,

All this just bcs they:

. Dont like elriel, Elain and the direction the series is going in.

before anyone says im bitter, im not. Its to be expected bcs Gwyn Berdara is perfect. She has no flaws. She has a general, popular fun, quirky “we can do this guys!” “Go us!”, personality. Yet still a blank slate for her “stans” to place any characteristic, theory or HC on her that they like. She has some interactions with the cool, mysterious Azriel and thats all you need for gwynriel. Thats all you need for G to become centre staged. It would have happened with any other fc that wouldve interacted with Azriel.

Whilst it is annoying and the meaning of the series has truly been lost to that side of the fandom, I think frustration comes from downplaying Elains role & giving it to Gwyn. Unfortunately, there’s nothing to be done. Popularity in the end will never matter. Sjm loves writing about polarising, flawed characters which Elain is and Gwyn isn’t. Clearly, Gwyn was never meant to be play a big role otherwise Mass - an author who loves foreshadowing- would have been introduced in person earlier. Its nice to remember: Elain was the focus of two bonuses. Elain has her book confirmed. Mass said SF left hints for Elains story. Not gwyn. Not Azriel. But Elain Archeron. At least the love for her is more genuine then I’ve seen from some Gwyn stans.

[impossiblycolorfulpanda]

The way Bryke treats Zutara shippers in general is just slightly disgusting. Making fun of them whenever the opportunity arises and using the ship as the butt of jokes too many times like… that’s a solid 70% of your fanbse you’re making fun of. They’re the reason you’re even on the map. Shut up Bryke. I don’t know about 70% of the fanbase, but even if it were only a small portion it’s still just…rude and unprofessional to mock your fans? I think about this a lot because I was 16 when the show ended and I know a lot of other Zutara shippers were also teenage girls, and Mike and Bryan were adults. Two grown men making fun of teenage girls who liked the show and the characters they had created. I don’t care how “obnoxious” some of the fans might have been to them - and I’m sure there were fans who were also out of line - but Mike and Bryan were the adults and they chose to act like children, and mean, spiteful children at that.

Ya telling me, and you know what else? They are a big reason why Zutara is so popular in the first place. Bryke are the primary showrunners, what they say goes, they are in charge of approving/allowing what scene goes in the series.

They didn't have to make Zuko say "I'll save you from the pirates" right before trying to uncharacteristically bargain with Katara with an uncharacteristically clam demeaner while unintentionally proposing to her, since the necklace reveals to be a betrothal necklace.

They didn't have to let Zuko and Katara be locked in a cave together with crystals that almost look similar to the crystals from the cave of two lovers. They could've been locked in two jail cells far away from each other.

Speaking of which, Oma and Shu didn't have to be colored red and and blue respectively in one of the flashback scenes (the red one even looked like Ozai) and have their respective nations be at war against each other. You could tell they really, really wanted that story to parallel to Kataang but did a piss poor job of it. For one, Aang and Katara's nations never fought each other, not like how the Fire Nation and Water Tribes were going at it.

Zuko didn't have to be vulnerable with Katara in that cave and briefly explain his banishment and still act calm around her. She didn't have to offer to heal her scar with the only spirit water she had. Jet's ghost be like. "Are you kidding me?! Thanks a lot!" Katara didn't have to be the very first person to touch his scar before bringing the water out and Zuko didn't have to let her touch it and neither of them had to stand their for 5 seconds as the music amps up.

Katara understandably threatened to waste Zuko if he looks even slightly suspicious, and yet she pays no mind with Zuko bringing both Aang and Sokka to life threatening side-quests beyond Katara's supervision, both of which end with Aang getting over his pyrophobia and Katara and Sokka being reunited with their father and Sokka reunited with his girlfriend. Bryke let all of this happen.

Zuko didn't have to be the one to give Katara the means to find emotional closure and finally overcome her trauma. Katara didn't have to open up to him about the much more grisly details about her mother's death and have Zuko compliment her mother's bravery, all before Katara finally decides to forgive Zuko.

They didn't have to have June tease about Katara and Zuko dating multiple times. They didn't have to allow Zuko and Katara share the "parental figure for the gaang" mantle. They didn't have to spend the last scene Aang and Katara have before making out with them having another heated argument while Zuko and Katara spent their time working together to usurp Zuko's way to the throne.

They also didn't have show parallels/symbolism, after parallels/symbolism, after parallels/symbolism.

It's Bryke's fault that Zutara caught so many people's attention and they have the nerve to mock and ridicule them for disagreeing with their personal self-insert fantasy that does not matter to the narrative. The whole thing with basing Kataang off of a little boy having it down bad for an older big-sister-like figure who doesn't feel the same way doesn't help Bryke's case at all either.

[welcometothejianghu]

Welcome to another round of W2 Tells You What You Should See, where W2 (me) tries to sell you (you) on something you should be watching. Today's choice: 少年歌行/The Blood of Youth

The Blood of Youth is a 2022 live-action adaptation of the tale of a deposed, disabled, and incredibly cunty prince who's on his way back to settle the score with his asshole father, and the rag-tag band of weirdos he accumulates along the way, including Spear Girl, Bad Monk, and Fire Puppy (pictured above).

I hope you like shounen anime, because this is the most shounen anime something is allowed to be without actually being based on something running weekly in Shounen Jump. What if Nirvana in Fire were also Naruto? It would be the Blood of Youth.

This show is an underrated gem of action-packed fun that not nearly enough people in English-speaking fandom have seen. In an attempt to correct that -- and ahead of an announced second season and prequel in progress -- I'm here with five reasons you should try it out.

1. Zero thoughts head empty

You do not have to pay an enormous amount of attention to this show to understand what's going on. The show itself does not always know what's going on. It got distracted by a shiny object over there, and now we're all gearing up to go punch the shiny object. We'll get back to the main plot when we're done with the punching.

It has a million billion plot threads going on at any given moment. Bad guys roll in from sects you've never heard of before, using superpowers with stupid names, only to get kicked into next week. There's approximately eleventy thousand characters -- so many, in fact, that I ran into problems several times while making this rec post, because there aren't readily available photos of everyone I want to talk about. Just look at the DramaWiki cast list. See how it goes on for like fifty screens? That's a little what the show feels like.

Except I'm not saying that like it's a bad thing, because the show knows it's doing this, and it acts accordingly. It telegraphs pretty well who's important and who isn't (and then it goes out of its way to color-code the latter, which is handy). What you're left with is absolutely a manga-style plot, complete with training arcs and semi-relevant sidequests, all working up to the final boss match.

It is an extremely self-aware show. On multiple occasions, something would happen, I would crack a joke about it, and then a beat later the show itself would make the exact same joke. I wouldn't call it an outright comedy, but it's still very funny, and on purpose. It has no illusions about being some kind of profound, meaningful epic. Mostly it's just here for a good time.

Yet this lightheartedness is what makes the powerful emotional parts really powerful by contrast. The show is not stupid; it's just goofing around most of the time. When it knuckles down, it can be devastating. And you know what? It does wind up being profound and meaningful about some stuff. How about that.

So yeah, if you're up for something that bops merrily right along and only occasionally rips your heart out, here you go!

2. Putting the poly in polycule

Bisexuals, rejoice! It's representin' time!

Here you go, I made a relationship chart of about 40% of the show's potential and canonical ships. I could have included so many more, but I only had so much space on the image, so I had to leave out some amazing ones, like the sword hedgehog who's real into this one cougar who could easily wipe the floor with him, or the rich nerd who thinks he has a chance with the aforementioned hot butch, or the fancy MILF who cheated on the emperor with a dreamy jianghu man and is trying not to cheat on him again with a different, slightly less dreamy jianghu man. See? There's just so much.

I would also say these are not exclusive ships. They are extremely inclusive ships. I am a fan of most (though admittedly not all) of the pairings listed here, and in fact of many of the three-and-more-somes indicated by these lines. They're such a cuddle puddle of shared intense feelings that it's hard to imagine anyone getting more than mildly jealous. Moreover, the potential for romance does not get in the way of hetero friendships; a boy and a girl who are each dating other people can go do adventures together, and (mostly) nobody gets weird about it, which is nice. If anything, what makes the overall dynamic so polycule-like is how equally friends and love interests get treated, meaning that it's not difficult to see a lot of crossover potential between those two categories.

If you're like me, you're hesitant about canonical romance, especially when it's straight, mostly because so many straight love stories wind up being tiresome, gross, and/or skull-poundingly boring. You will then be pleasantly surprised by how the canon pairings with members of the main cast are not like this at all!

Xiao Se and Sikong Qianluo are the main textual romance, and golly gee, they're just cute as heck. As the chart above indicates, I like interpreting them as two Kinsey 6's who have found their single exceptions, Mulder-and-Scully-style. Maybe one of the best things about their relationship is that it gets sidelined all the time for the plot. They're not so busy being in love that they forget to get shit done. Then they get a bit of downtime and get to go on a date, and you're like, aww, those sweet gay disaster babies are gonna do a little bit of heterosexuality. Just precious.

Tang Lian and Fairy Rui are right up there with the cuteness. She's a sex-positive dancing beauty who wants to ride that pretty boy like she stole him, and he's a shy sword boy so tightly bottled up that he'll explode if he sees a bare ankle. Avoiding spoilers, I will simply say that this is a pairing of two relatively soft people, until a bad thing happens to one of them and the other hardens up about it. If that's your jam, they're here for you.

Lei Wujie and Ye Ruoye are probably the most magical and the most practical of the bunch. They have a beautiful, super-dreamy, really horny sword-dance meet-cute, complete with its own pop song ... and then that's it, they're basically just together. She likes him, he likes her, good for them. In-laws aside, it's a refreshingly low-drama situation. Besides, I always love it when the hypercompetent woman gets the sweet, devoted himbo who'd do anything for her. Ruoye's had a hard life, and she deserves someone who can dick her down good at night and make her a nourishing breakfast the next morning.

And then there is, of course, The Ship:

Xiao Se and Wuxin are canonical, textual soulmates. The show treats their dynamic as more important than any other. It's so important, in fact, that the show has to sideline Wuxin for huge parts of the drama, lest everything get too damn gay. They each get a boyfriend catch on the other. They both do fairly reckless things when the other is in trouble. They are the secret hidden happy ending to the series. They share the kind of ride-or-die relationship built on mutually being the hugest bitches in any given room. Whether or not you think this is romance, it is extremely romantic, and the series agrees as much as it can, all things considered.

And if none of those flavors of love float your boat? Well, have you considered ... eunuchs?

3. She likes e4e

So I'm on record as being real into eunuch characters, right? Well, if you're with me on that, you are in for a treat here, because these are some absolutely buck-wild eunuchs.

There's five main ones, and I can't even begin to scratch the surface of what's going there. Like, really, I don't even think I understood all of what was happening with them. They're kind of the bad guys, but then they're kind of the good guys, but then some of them are the bad guys, but then they're just working for the bad guys, but then they screw over the bad guys, and ... it's just a lot, okay? It's a lot, and it's all happening with this bunch of catty bitches.

Also, you would not believe the difficult time I had finding any images for this section. I guess for some reason, fandom isn't way into a bunch of canonically dickless color-coordinated middle-aged men in weird hats? Whatever, man, they are missing out. If, however, you have the good sense to be into the intense and complicated (semi-romantic??) relationships among colleagues who also professionally just happen to be missing their external genitalia, buddy, strap in (and maybe strap on, depending).

Don't let me oversell how much these guys are in the show. They're not. They're vaguely important at points throughout, and they become incredibly important near the end, but they're hardly main characters. They're mostly back at the palace, doing their various schemes and looking absolutely fantastic.

So if they're such a minor part of the story, why do they get their own selling point? Well, I think their presence is a good example of two specific things about the show:

Specific thing the first: It's so queer -- not gay, but queer. Thinking back to my last selling point, you will notice how many of those straight pairings may look normie on the outside, but once you get down to it are not playing by cishet rules. (For instance, I've seen a lot of people read Tang Lian's resistance to sexual advances as asexuality, which, sure!) Likewise, there are lots of incredibly important, intimate relationships that don't conform to standard romantic pair dynamics. Add to that a lot of bodies with unusual characteristics and conditions, and you've got the makings of plenty of delightful non-normative love stories.

Specific thing the second: There are so many things going on with so many side characters that there's a kink here for everyone. Don't care for eunuchs? How about slinky villains with mind-control powers? Devoted servants who would do anything for their masters? Former bad guys who owe life-debts to the good guys who saved them? Bonded pairs traipsing around the jianghu together? Sons nursing legitimate grudges against the men who killed their fathers? Alcoholic widowers with incredibly slutty necklines? Mysterious cross-dressers with unconvincing moustaches? Vengeful brides? Martial siblings? Murderous royals? Guilt-ridden half-siblings? Boring star-crossed lovers? All these and more! It's a smorgasbord of rarepair fuel!

Also, I just love these toxic drama queens. It's like if RuPaul's Drag Race had the authority to have you executed.

4. The most intriguing outfits I've ever seen in anything (and yes, I'm including Winter Begonia)

Time for a fashion show!

The asymmetrical fits, the detailed embroidery on everything, the brilliant colors -- everybody just looks so good. And yet everything still looks ... eh, I don't know if "practical" is the word I want, but at least wearable. Nobody's dragging ten-foot trains of fabric behind them or wrapped in eighty floofy layers of gauze (except Rui, but she's special). Their outfits are strange and elaborate, but they don't defy physics.

What's truly stunning is how often they get new outfits. Xiao Se alone changes clothes about once every other episode, and more if he's getting a flashback. He is the fashion plate of the whole series, and every look he serves is pitch-perfect.

They're not outright color-coded, but the main characters do have certain colors associated with them -- which is extra-fun when you watch those colors bleeding into their friends' clothes as their relationships get stronger. I also think -- and I'm willing to be proven wrong on this point, but I think I'm right -- that they recycle some characters' outfits into parts of other characters' outfits. On more than one occasion, I'd swear that Lei Wujie shows up wearing the left half of something Xiao Se was wearing a few episodes back (tailored to fit him, of course, because that dumb ponytail boy is tall).

Where I think the costume design gets massive points, though, is that the costumes are themselves adaptations.

Before the live-action series, there was a 2018 3D animated donghua. I have never watched the latter, but apparently the drama is intensely faithful to the animated visuals, to the point where some fights are shot-for-shot remakes.

Of course, you can do a lot more with unreal clothing and bodies in animation -- and you can show a lot more skin, at least according to Chinese content laws. The live-action costumers chose to preserve about as many of the appearance beats from the donghua as they could manage, while still accepting the limitations of real-life bodies and materials. You can see some side-by-side comparisons here. The live-action outfits manage to be instantly recognizable without being slavishly devoted recreating to their inspirations.

So if you're sick and tired of dreary, ill-lit shows with bland palettes, this vibrant, colorful drama may be just the thing for you. It's a rainbow from start to finish.

5. Actually a good central plot?

Despite all the wacky delightful shounen nonsense that this show has -- and it has a lot -- the core of the whole narrative, which is Xiao Se's story, is surprisingly great and cohesive.

The short version is this: Xiao Se used to be Xiao Chuhe, sixth prince and somewhat heir apparent. Then he and his jerk-ass dad had a falling-out that resulted in the prince's having his martial arts abilities all but taken from him. He's been living the life of a very well-dressed innkeeper for several years, trying to avoid all of that palace garbage. But now his jerk-ass dad is dying, which means that a lot of horrible decisions are finally having unfortunate consequences for everyone, and Xiao Se's got to get back in there to make sure everything does not go to shit and land someone terrible on the throne -- even if it has to mean taking it himself.

His central conflict is between what he used to be and what he's become. Does he miss being Xiao Chuhe, high-ranked martial artist and future emperor? Or is he happier being Xiao Se, long-suffering nobody who can barely run a business, much less hold his own in a fight? What would he be willing to do to get back what he's lost? What are his obligations to himself versus his obligations to everyone else? How much is he responsible for his father's bullshit? And why has he wound up having to babysit this stupid Fire Puppy?

It's okay, they're best friends now. Lei Wujie decided.

No spoilers, but I liked Xiao Se's ending a lot. I feel it's very true to the character and shows a real understanding of who he is and what he values. And really, at the end of the day, sometimes all you need for a happy ending is your girlfriend, your girlfriend's girlfriend, your girlfriend's girlfriend's boyfriend who's also your boyfriend, your other boyfriend, his girlfriend, and your long-distance for-real soulmate.

Feel like giving the youths a try?

You can find them on YouTube or on Viki. But be absolutely sure that no matter where you watch it, you make sure to go watch the epilogue as well. (And if you get real into the story, well, here's a link to information about all the other adaptations.)

You are also welcome for how I did not spend this post going off for five hundred years on how much I love Wuxin and his funky relationship to Buddhism. I figured that's way too niche of a selling point for most people, and might indeed have even been counterproductive. But know that I could have.

Also, I'm very happy about the announcement of a second season, because that's going to mean Liu Xueyi has to shave his head again, and he looks unbearably good with a shaved head.

Oh yeah, did I forget to mention the whole motorcycle photoshoot?

In case you hadn't noticed, the whole cast is stupidly hot. Hachi machi.

[greatlascottwrites]

An essay about Iris Hawthorne

So I will preface this by saying that I am not an Iris hater but she never sat right with me after Bridge to the Turnabout. I'm a biased Narumitsu shipper but I do entertain other ships (helllllloooooo Langworth) but I couldn't get behind Feenris for a few reasons.

She's a victim, yes, but she's complicit as an accessory to crimes. We last see her serving time for covering up the murder of Misty Fey but this is just the one that caught up with her. There's been at least two times she was at least privy to Dahlia's crimes (the fake kidnapping plot, Valerie's murder, Diego's poisoning) but the real issue in my mind is that she did nothing after the fact.

Firstly, she could have spoken up after the kidnapping plot but did not. We could give her the benefit of the doubt and say that she didn't know that Dahlia was even alive, or that she could plead ignorance to what actually happened, but this is only the first incidence in a damning thread. Also, she still could have at least passed information along that suggested the kidnapping was not all that it seemed, given that Dahlia had tried to recruit her. And, if she believed Dahlia to be dead, what was stopping her from speaking out?

Secondly, and I'm putting her deception during her relationship with Phoenix to the side here for a second, why didn't she do anything when he was arrested for a murder he didn't commit? It's hard to be generous here because Iris was privy to all of Dahlia's plans (Violet, Fawles, Diego Armando) except the one involving Phoenix, but that's only because Dahlia kept her in the dark intentionally because Iris would have sabotaged it. However, she had to have been aware of what happened in the aftermath. Doug Swallows was murdered and Dahlia was, once again, at the center of it all. It was Mia, not Iris, who saved Phoenix. There's no evidence to suggest Iris was somehow unable to take action because she just went back to Hazakura afterwards. She never provides any excuse as to why she failed Phoenix when he needed her the most.

Now, back to Phoenix, here's where it gets fun. I am going to posit that her falling in love with Phoenix and wanting to protect him from Dahlia is for her benefit, not his. This is also, ironically, the first time Iris does something selfish. She fell in love with him and wouldn't let Dahlia kill him, but that's because for the first time in her life she wanted something. But I can't accept this protectiveness as romance. If she wanted what was best for him, she would have done something, anything either before this point or at the time of his arrest even if it meant getting into trouble. She, once again, chose to obscure the truth and instead did nothing.

Further to that, I can't accept her actions at Bridge to the Turnabout as anything but self-serving. She continued to hide the truth until it was presented to her. It was only at the eleventh hour that she confessed she loved Phoenix all along. It doesn't exactly inspire much confidence in her motives.

Now, all of this actually makes her a more interesting character in my eyes, so again, this isn't an Iris hate essay. She's tricky to get right in a Narumitsu context but here's a shameless plug to my story if you want to see my take on it: https://archiveofourown.org/works/63292576/chapters/162138757