#but I made myself get dental insurance just so I can make an appointment if I’m going to pay I’m hoping that will push me to visit

[athetos]

I’ve been noticing more tooth pain lately and I don’t know how much is actually real and how much is my ocd fucking with me but idk I just really hope nothing crazy like an infection or something is happening even if it is they’ll catch it before it progresses enough to do anything. I do brush my teeth regularly and I try to remember to floss and mouthwash like I’m definitely overreacting but I won’t stop being anxious until I finally get in somewhere

Nervous to go to the dentist again once I have insurance because I’m soooooo afraid he’s gonna be like “okay your wisdom teeth have to go that will be 1 million dollar”

[pinkantagonist]

I’m just gonna vent about adhd for a second.

A while back, I told my boss (past boss) that I had adhd. I was being converted from a contract worker to full time, so disclosing my disability seemed like a normal part of that process. I wanted to put my best foot forward at my new job, and ask for reasonable accommodations so I could do my best work. My boss and I had a good relationship, so I felt very confident about it.

He scoffed at me, said that “everyone has a little adhd”, and then went off about how kids are over diagnosed. I sat in silence for the rest of the conversation. Oh, and it took about 8 months for me to get my requested accommodations.

I have a different boss now, who is much kinder about it, but this really colored my experience of being a working person with adhd. Sometimes I forget that I’m disabled or I don’t consider myself as such, but the corporate world has a way of reminding me.

Well, this morning I fucked up. I was supposed to do a small presentation and I completely forgot, and missed about 90% of it (I work remotely and have somewhat flexible hours, for context).

I remembered at the tail end of the meeting, jumped into the call and apologized to everyone, and was able to finish it up, after my boss had so kindly stepped in and presented most of it for me. I made a real ass of myself and I’m trying SO hard not to spiral about it… it was absolutely mortifying.

Now, this was 100% my fault. I’m not trying to blame anything else, but damn is it just… hard. It’s so hard for me to like, be a person. And the adderall shortage is making it so much worse. I can only get the instant release tablets, MAYBE, if I’m lucky, and they just flat out don’t work as well as the extended release, which are impossible to find right now.

I have pretty severe TMJ, which is exacerbated by the instant release, so I’m constantly balancing being in so much agony and being a functioning person. The less pain I experience the more I fail at my responsibilities, and the more pain I’m in the better my brain works... And the more teeth I break. You don’t even want to know how much I’ve spent on dental work, and a mouth guard that my insurance refused to cover.

Basically, yesterday I chose to be irresponsible with less pain on my day off, which had major repercussions today. If I’m not like, 110% stressed out about everything 24/7 I WILL forget pretty much all appointments and commitments, but it’s unsustainable to live like this and my health is FAILING. I can feel myself becoming weaker and worn out. I’m killing myself just to appear “normal”. But I can’t do anything less, because if I get fired, goodbye health insurance! Then I wouldn’t even be able to get the shitty instant release tablets.

And it’s all invisible. No one suspects a thing. I can’t really talk about it. I told everyone we experienced a power outage, because the real reason just seems silly. Sorry, I took a day off from being a person yesterday because my daily life makes me feel like I’m drowning, and my meds didn’t kick in fast enough for me to remember on time! Sorry, I was distracted by having to pry my jaw open to brush my teeth when I woke up today since I already lost my $800 night guard! Sorry, I have chronic IBS which causes me so much pain that sometimes I can’t even move when I first get up, which was what delayed me taking my meds in the first place!

I don’t know what the point of this was. Happy disability month, I guess. It absolutely sucks here.

And if you think “everyone has a little adhd”, please go fuck yourself.

[thedovahcat]

Gorillas Getting Judged

Tomorrow's my assessment and I am hella nervous but a little excited but also mostly nervous.

I think I'm as ready as I'll ever possibly be about it and I've been talking about it with my friends about the likelihood of x y z and what may possibly happen and all that

Wuff.. the sooner all this is over the better... even if this is something I've wanted to know about for a long time, it's still very like...anxiety-inducing.

It's just an interview. Not like it's a job or anything. I hope I get a result I'm happy with, some days I still feel like "yeah nothing is probably up with me maybe I did this for nothing" and others I'm very confident about I guess having some sort of disorder going on.

I'd really like a professionals opinion and that's coming up. The only thing I'm terrified of is being written off. But, this maybe won't be the case if I'm doing this independantly of insurance and general doctors and all that...

So...

We'll see!! If it's some INCONCLUSIVE type answer then frankly I don't know what I'll do. What can I do though? Can't keep running to multiple places, cuz then it'll feel like I'm just probing for someone to tell me what I want. And I don't want that, ironically speaking.

I’m still really upset and pissed off that my parents still don’t take things like this seriously, and honestly they may never. Which, is just something I’ll have to deal with. I can’t be open with this kind of stuff about them, can’t talk about it unless it’s only happening to someone else. Minority families are just like that, what can I say? There’s that stigma attached to it like so many other things and mental illness in the family?? Ohoho boy you best get prepared to be yelled at and told off that it’s all fake and nothing you feel is real. No support at all. I’ve talked about this kind of thing before though so, nothing new there. Dad’s still harping on and on about how I better hear the answer I want to hear and I better get my money’s worth because it’s such a rip off etc etc. Like... I’m getting this assessment done without being on a huge waiting list, without paying exorbitant fees- I’m really lucky I can afford something like this for myself to be honest. And I’m in a good position right now to be able to have an assessment done in the first place. So yeah...

Hhhh.. moving along...on top of that, I got all my new computer parts so I've been making a backup of my system but that's taking so long. I have effectively banished myself from computer games so I wish I woulda planned that a bit better. Oh well.. by the weekend I'll have jazzy new parts and a speedier computation machine so.. something to look forward to.

There’s not much else to be said in the meantime, at least until tomorrow perhaps. Hopefully my mind won’t be blown to smithereens and I’ll be feeling OK or better than that. Something positive. It’s been a real emotional and tense week (and it’s only going to be Wednesday). With all the college stuff mounting, I’m just... I’m tired. I want to relax, I want a break, I wanna do stuff I like doing and continue on like normal... But for now I can’t.

Gotta schedule Tato’s dental speaking of which... I’m a bit nervous about that but my mom’s already made an appointment for the other cat so I’m going to see how his appt turns out before taking Tato in for his teeth cleaning. The vet said they were really gnarly (which was surprisingly cuz the previous vet said nothing about this) so I hope it doesn’t come down to like.... a ton of extractions or whatever the case. I’d feel bad and so would my wallet, but hey, gotta do whatever is necessary to keep that boi healthy.

That’s it for now though...

Wish me...luck??? I guess? Thu..mbs up?

[latina4rmbx]

The Importance of Advocating for Yourself

It would seem that the theme of the week for me is patient advocation. When I say patient doesn't necessarily have to be an outside person, could just be myself.

Below are 3 scenarios

I was speaking to a dear person in my life and she was telling me how she needs this procedure but the medicine for the procedure hasn't been delivered yet so she's at a loss. She informed me she had an appointment with a provider coming up that works in the same facility. I suggested she inform the provider of the medication issue and to say: you may not be able to fix this issue, but I need to know what's the hold up and since you work in the office, you may have some sway on a response (because no one is calling her). I'll be calling her at the end of the week to see what happened.

Was on the phone with someone who stated that they feel their concerns aren't being heard and worried that something may happen. I loved having this conversation because not only where they advocating for themselves, they are vehemently advocating for themselves with made me proud but also sad.

I went to the dentist and they were short staffed (thank goodness) so I was told the Office Manager was going to call me to discuss next steps, financing and set up appointment. The Office Manager called me and during the course of our conversation she informs me my deductible is $1,000. I flipped my lid because according to the website for my dental insurance my deductible is $100. So, me like a smart ass, "correct" her and she's explains (LOL) that the provider is not IN-Network.

So here's where the advocacy comes in to play, especially when it comes to your health. You need to learn to speak up for yourself. Always. If you have a pain or feel you need something or need help, speak up!

In regards to my dental appt, I called my insurance and confirmed that the doctor was infact IN network. According to the Office Manager, the dental office was in network but not the individual provider. I looked on the website and found the provider, found where it stated In network and got to work.

I called the insurance and asked if the provider was in network because I was told he wasn't. She stated the provider was NOT in network. So my response is: The website states it was updated on 07/08/24 (today is 07/09/24) and I'm looking right at the providers name. The Insurance Rep asked me for some information that I could see. I gave it to her and she was like "He IS in network and has been since October 2023."

Now, I say Thank Goodness the Office Manager wasn't in because had she told me that to my face I would've cursed her out and left the office pissed off and close to tears. Since she called me after I was already back to my desk, I was able to pull up the information with no issue.

My insurance Rep was great because she investigated and even tried to call the dental office. The Office Manager was great because she understood my frustration (a difference of $900) and was kind enough to say she's going to check again and call me back.

Had I not known anything about my insurance or the dentist I would've been told I have to pay $1000 and would've figured out what to do and then gotten whatever I needed done.

This is something I hate, especially when it comes to older people advocating for themselves. Bare with me...People try to take advantage because they're older and don't have a good memory and if you make things sound urgent enough you can scare an older person to give you almost any information you ask for. They just take your word that the deductible is $1000 and not realize that it's 10X's less than that.

Please advocate for yourselves. The world is grimey and people are getting more and more desperate. Keep your head on a metaphorical swivel.

Thanks for reading.

XOXO

[goldkirk]

FINALLY something I can call a victory, go me! Felt safe enough to go to a doctor and ask for the Vaccine of Eternal Doom.

tl;dr - I've wanted to get the HPV vaccine for so long. Today I finally did it, and another vaccine I was missing too. 

I didn't get questioned about anything further than what I volunteered information for. I didn't have to give any proof or give any detail if I said something, I didn't have to convince anyone to believe me even though I was vague and shied away from details. I only had to sit on the exam table for maybe two minutes, only for the shots. No one touched me anywhere except my arm, everyone was completely respectful, and no one judged me for being so late to get exams/care or not knowing how some health system things work yet. 

Do I feel safe? No, of course not! Loooooong way to go until that. But things are better.

I have my own health insurance now. I have a little extra money each month now, so I can set up an appointment without checking my debit balance down to the cent to verify I can actually afford an $8 prescription or $30 co-pay. I don't have to let anyone come in the exam room with me anymore. 

No one can see what medical visits or treatments I get on insurance records. No one will be able call and get information on me despite HIPPA protections ever again. I can learn from modern medical staff about what things I'm supposed to do--physicals, health maintenance, vaccinations, etc. I have access to all the information I want and need and am asked screening questions I was never asked growing up. 

I know what is and isn't supposed to happen at doctor visits now. I have rights now and I know them. I have control now and I'm using it. I'm so proud of myself. 

I still have a lot of dental problems I keep running away from, and I have health issues I didn't bring up in this visit, and I have more vaccine doses and catch-up health checks to go, but today I think was the biggest step and the first thing that's really made me understand that I never have to be not in control of my health decisions or medical privacy ever again. 

I'm not going to hell for getting a vaccine, I'm not possessed by a demon, I'm not brainwashed by Satan, I don't need to sneak behind anyone's back. I am in charge of my personal space and who I allow to touch or not touch my body, and also apparently there are people in the world who are just super respectful right off the bat without you even having to ask or beg for the respect and autonomy that you're meant to have. 

I sat in the chair like a hunched-up shelter dog, I sounded way too cheerful when giving the best simple explanations about my past that I could, I fidgeted with my rubber band non-stop, and it took 15 minutes for me to finally spit out a couple honest "hey, so, fyi..."s rather than just answering prompted questions. My hands were shaking after the doctor walked out, but for once, that seemed okay. I was nauseous and shaky and felt like my whole body was ready to explode, but instead of a spiral of fear and dissociation, it for once felt like it was only happening to me, not that it was me. I was proud of myself and understanding to my body instead of feeling like my reaction was wrong. It was okay! It was a reasonable reaction, and I did the hard thing anyway that was good for my health and future. I'm allowed to start planning as if I'll have a future, and my body deserves the best I can give it from now on, no matter how that "best" changes up and down each month. I've gone five months without wanting to truly die. It's going to be better. I'm going to make it. I'm starting to find ways to remember that. I'm learning to not be purely terrified of having to exist in a physical body. That bodies can be good, and not just lead to shame or danger.  

It's done! I did it! I did it just for me. <3 I hope if anyone else has been in the same boat, my experience might help you feel a little less alone or a little more ready to get medical care too.

[tsuki-xoxo]

Could you make a headcannon of shouto, bakugou and deku do dealing with their stubborn fem s/o who doesn't want to go to the dentist even though they need to because their tooth is hurting or just needs a dental check up but rather not. (like raven had to go see a dentist in teen titans go! because she had a cracked tooth)

Check-Up!

Pairing: Todoroki Shoto x Reader, Bakugo Katsuki x Reader, Midoriya Izuku x Reader

Warnings: Swearing

A/N: Thank you for sending this request anon! I had so much fun making this for you! I changed a couple of things in your request for the boys because I didn’t want it to be too repetitive AND I COULDN’T HELP MYSELF ADDING FLUFF. I hope you enjoy my love :) 

“I don’t see why it’s such a problem for me to pay instead,” Todoroki simply replies.

“Babe, it’s not a problem per se. It’s just--” you paused, “-- you don’t have to. Besides, it’s your dad’s money, not yours.” 

You have a dentist appointment in about two hours for a wire replacement for your braces, but (un)surprisingly, your insurance somehow wouldn’t cover it this time for some reason: absolute bull (fuck capitalism). So, now you’re left to pay outta pocket for some string of metal across your teeth.

“Yes, it’s my dad’s card, what about it?”

“Wha--?” Your eyes locked onto his as you stared incredulously only for your bi hair-colored boyfriend to stare blankly back at you. 

You couldn’t really say you were surprised at his insistence on using Endeavor’s cash. You appreciate the sentiment, really, but you always feel bad when people help you. You can’t help but feel like you’re some sort of nuisance-- it’s the trauma luv ✨ 

You couldn’t stop the wide smile from spreading at Todoroki’s cute and unfazed expression. Reaching out to cup his face in your hand, you quickly pressed your lips against his.

Todoroki’s heterochromatic eyes widened in surprise. “Oh--” he breathed, a faint blush on his cheeks. He was taken aback by the sudden kiss, but you caught the disappointment at how short it was from the furrow of his brow. 

“Thank you.” Your face was mere centimeters from his, and every word you said brought a teasing brush from your lips against his. “But, I got it.”

Just kidding, cutie! 

When you exited the dentist’s room with newly placed wires, your jaw dropped. You noticed Todoroki at the cash register with a shiny black credit card between his fingers. 

“Shoto wait!”

Too late :) he was already placing the card back in his wallet. “I paid,” he announced. 

You blinked, grabbing his hand and pulling him outside. “You didn’t have to--”

“--I wanted to. If we were to switch places, I know you would’ve done the same.” 

Yup, it’s time to pass away. You could’ve sworn your knees buckled on the spot, melting at how sweet he is. No wonder you surprised him with another chaste kiss.

Todoroki shook his head, traces of a smile lighting up his face. 

“(Y/N) I swear to fucking god, just schedule a damn appointment!” 

You pout, arms crossing over your chest. “No, I don’t need to! The pain will go away by itself.”

Bakugo growled as his sharp crimson orbs narrowed. Your boyfriend is incredibly observant, so when he noticed you eating on the opposite side of where you usually chew, he knew something was wrong in an instant. He was this close to pulling his hair out for you to finally admit your molars ache every time you eat.  

“Well if you don’t get them checked, they could get worse, Baka.” With the way he was glaring at you, you would have thought that you were being cursed with evil eye. Lucky for you, though, you’re safe. He is concerned about you, after all. 

“I’m not going! What are you going to do, force me?” You snort, rolling your eyes. 

Not only are you a brat, but you must be stupid as hell for thinking that that’s not exactly what he was going to do. You may be stubborn, but so is he, times 100.

Shooting up from his seat, his firm hands wrap around you as he abruptly makes his way to the car. Yelling out for his mom (old-hag) to drive you guys to the dentist. And of course, Mitsuki did, her blood-red eyes ogling at the two of you as she squeals how cute you two are the whole time you two are fighting one another in the back seat. 

“KATSUKI LET ME GO!”

“SHUT THE FUCK UP!”

You two really know how to make a scene. You both quit literally slam into the receptionist’s room, your boyfriend’s voice, thankfully, several octaves louder than yours, demanding for you to be checked immediately. 

And you were. They found out that your tooth had a slight crack, which was fixed with a simple filling. Already you could feel the discomfort lightening. When you exited the room, you found your angry pomeranian leaning against the wall, a pout fixed over his lips, and his brows twitching from the sight of you. 

Smiling, you give him a big hug before pressing a firm kiss on his lush lips, arms wrapping around his neck. “Thank you, baby.”

“Get off me,” he huffed but made no move to pull you off of him. Instead, enveloping you in his arms, his cheeks warming up at the sudden affection. “Next time, listen to me, dumbass.”

Midoriya is a certified baby™️. So when you adamantly deny going to a simple dentist check-up, poor boy short-circuits. 

He knew you were stubborn, but damn you’re not going to go to a simple fucking check-up?

So when the two of you are studying for an English exam, you catch him staring intently, biting his fingernails.

“Izuku?” you ask, worriedly fanning your hand across his face to catch his attention. 

“(Y-Y/N), can you please go to your check-up?” His entire body turns fifty shades redder as you tilt your head to the side and confusedly blink at him. You didn’t understand why he was panicking over such a simple question like that, but baby boy was internally struggling if he should ask because he didn’t want you to think that he was disrespectful. 

“What if you have a cavity?!” Midoriya retorts, running a hand through his disheveled curls. “Now, I’m not saying you do have one, but if you do and it’s left untreated your teeth could rot and--”

You silence him by pecking his lips. 

“Would it make you more comfortable if I go to my appointment?”

He nods, emerald eyes wide. 

“Ok,” you sighed, “I’ll go.”

When you meet up with Deku after your check-up, you announce to him that everything looks good. No cavities, gums are good, but you do leave out the bit where the dentists’ repeatedly urged you to start flossing like they always do. 

You note how he visibly relaxes, and you have the sudden urge to envelope him in your arms, so you do. You duck your head in the space between his head and neck. “I’m sorry for making you so worried. I’ll go to all my appointments from now on if that’ll make you comfortable.”

When you lift your head to meet his eyes, you’re met with such a dazed and adorable expression from Midoriya. You couldn’t help but cup his face and lay a lasting kiss.

[vampireknitting]

My wonderful boyfriend has ADD and anxiety. I mean anymore who doesn’t. But the ADD makes things hard from him, I see it, I get annoyed by it occasionally, but I know it’s not something he can control so we work with it and I don’t let myself get angry. I got my own issues so it’s a little messed up for me to do anything else in my opinion, especially when he helps me with my shit.

During covid he was fired by new management from his old place, for no reason other than they didn’t like him. So he had to get a new one. He got it pretty quickly considering everything else. New business in side a bigger one. When he start there wasn’t a single issue. At least none to be had with him. But upper management needed a new supervisor and he has the the best resume so he was picked and transferred to the other store. Which is where all the bs started. One of the guys he worked with is a little bitch, I’m not saying this just because I think he’s a little bitch, but because he went around and had everyone put in a complaint about my love all because he “raised his voice”. My love doesn’t do that. He’s never once yelled at me, not in any fight or argument or when I’ve been nasty and would have deserved it. We’ve been together for 9 years now, that’s just not the type of man he is. So management took him aside and explained that the little bitch is a known drama source and that he is transferring to a new part in the big store and not working with them anymore period.

All good right? Apparently not because the little bitch has made a friend. A friend who is actively trying to make my darlings life miserable when they work. My darling was told “this is a teaching moment” and was to find a way through this all because we can’t fire people who are trying to sabotage another that’s not how we learn. That my love needs to encourage and support the coworkers to work through things and get along. The second set of complaints were acknowledged for being fake and ignored. Which left my love feeling hella stressed because if he worked at the old place all of them would have been fired by now. But not this place, it’s all just a learning experience.

So the little bitches friend found himself a little girlfriend. He likes to come to work to hangout with her when he’s not working, likes to bring her flowers and they plan on moving into an apartment together. He pushed her into complaining about my love because she’d been there for a bit now and no issues. But not just complaining, no she fucking put in a sexual harassment claim because he asked her to button up her top like the rest of them.

He has long black hair, he’s overweight, he’s awkward, he’s anxious and he doesn’t like fighting if he don’t have to. His main hobby is video games and manga. He’s a total shut in and it’s why we work so well. We hangout and do our own things together. He’s a quiet keep to himself type of man. I’ve been unable to maintain a job since 2016. He has some decent dental insurance so we are working on taking care of that for the first time in like 6 years.

This was just my cleaning appointment. Just one. His will be the same. We will spend like $40-$50 for the appointment but without the insurance it’s $295 just for the cleaning. I have some cavities that gotta be taken care of which is about $700 for both rounds I’ll have to do and he has some too. I have 4 heavily impacted wisdoms teeth, one of which is laying down and just straight up pushing into my teeth and never leaving the gums without being removed. Before we get to know how much that’ll be I have a $400 X-ray that’s gotta be done so we can know how close my wisdom teeth are to the main nerve in my jaw and the insurance is only covering the cavity’s…

It’ll be a few thousand to get them removed. But how much exactly idk. I was told they don’t know if I have nerve damage yet. After the cleaning and feeling the sonic pick thing vibrating my brain I wouldn’t be the least bit shock to learn there is nerve damage.

I wish I didn’t feel so useless. I wish I could do more because his family sees me a a burden and they aren’t quiet about it. I tried to apply for assistance but I was told he makes too much and he could just support me. Which only makes it all so much harder. I’m disabled, but not enough that the government deems me worth helping, but enough that’s it’s completely my fault I can’t work. Like to hold a part time job I’d have to go back to smoke a fuck ton of weed or the pain is going to cripple me. But most places won’t let that happen because I’m just a lazy pothead. No one believes me when I try to explain that painkillers make me sick, they fuck up my stomach and make me throw up. Yoga and weed have been the only reasons why I’m just a cane user and not trapped in a wheelchair chair. But who’s gonna hire the young bitch with a cane? All they do is look at me with pity. I’m not reliable enough to hire, 4 hours a day is my max for cleaning and shit. Who’s gonna hire that?

[writefinch]

Family-Owned Small Business

(CN: incest, sex work, mentions of sexual assault & suicidal ideation)

The worst part of my job is administration. Last-minute rescheduling when a client flakes on us. Chasing up payments. Booking accommodation at short notice. Answering messages! Jesus, every time in the last year when I've slumped, sighed, and thought to myself "fuck working, I need a break from all this" it's been when I've opened my messages and seen thirty different texts that need a reply. Some people are fine with it I guess, but for me it's boring, time consuming, and stressful.

Big deal though, right, I mean nobody loves doing admin, why even bring it up? Well, if I tell someone that for work last night I ate a client's cum out of my mom's pussy, I'd expect that they'd get fixated on the sex work and the incest. I'd expect them to freak out and not pay attention to the specifics of what I'm saying. So, first, I'd like that person to know that the thing I hate about my job is probably the same thing that *they* hate about *their* job. I would rather lick my mom's asshole for five minutes than answer emails for five minutes, and I answer a lot of emails.

Do we have to worry about violence, danger, cops, and legal trouble? Yeah, we do. Am I scared of these things? Yeah, sometimes, but I had to worry about all of those things before I started doing sex work. At least now we've got the money to buy our way out of the worst of it.

I'm not saying that what I do with mom is an objectively healthy relationship, let alone a perfect one. If you took me back in time and told me I could pick a completely different life for me and my mom, I'm sure there's a bunch of choices I'd pick over this one. But I never had that choice. I got hurt a lot growing up. I feel like I've finally escaped the things that hurt me, but I know that I've barely started to recover from them.

That's why I'm writing this. We've saved enough money to afford some therapy and my first session is next week. I want help with the fear, the nightmares, the mood swings and insomnia, I want to stop the rush of rage and terror that flows through me every time I see the word 'dad,' I want help untangling the stuff that came out of being told I was a pansy when I was growing up, then figuring out I'm gay, then figuring out I'm a girl, then figuring out I'm all three of those things while I was living in a place that kept trying to kill me for it. What I don't want is for the psych to pin it all on the two least harmful and least fucked-up things about my life, and worse, I don't want them to make me believe it. This journal is a prophylactic, an assessment of my job, my relationships and my life that I can refer back to if and when someone sticks their fingers in my brain and swirls them around.

I'll start with a problem statement: my dad. The memories that hurt the most are the ones where he almost appeared human, the flickers of joy, curiosity and humor that stood out from the bland cruelty that made up the rest of his personality. I'll remember him buying me ice cream or talking about a book or a movie with me, I'll doubt myself and wonder if I just went crazy and cut him out of my life for no reason, and then my brain will hook onto a random act of sadism he inflicted on me.

The physical abuse was bad all on its own, real psycho shit like driving me out into the woods and making me pick through the brush for a switch he could hit me with and a whole lot more I won't go into, but the emotional abuse was worse. When I was eleven, I forgot to feed my cat one day. He gave her away to my uncle, but told me that she'd developed malnutrition and had to be put down. I didn't find out the truth for another two years, when he just let it slip at Easter. He bragged about it, even, like he'd invented a really smart child-rearing technique. I don't want to write too much down here because I don't need to, if anything I want therapy to *stop* everything he did from running through my head. He's a punishment-obsessed sadist, a Baptist, and he works as a judge. Did he ever sexually abuse me? No. Parent of the year, right? He kicked me out for being a fag the day I turned eighteen, so it's ironic that my biggest fear is that he comes looking for me. He doesn't even know I'm a girl.

On the other hand, my mom has had an interesting life. She's kind of a fuck up. When I was one year old, mom and dad split and dad got full custody--being a judge helped with that--while mom left the state. She spent a decade trying to kick a heroin habit and a year and a half in prison for related stuff, got banned from even entering the state I lived in on account of her parole--again, dad being a judge helped with that--illegally emigrated to Canada for a while, and went to Oregon by mistake, doing a mixture of bartending, delivery driving, MDMA dealing and whoring to stay afloat.

The only reason we met again is that I was in the same city staying with friends, also whoring. I don't remember the first time I saw her, but the first time we talked was in a mutual friend's tiny studio apartment with a few other hooker friends. We ended up comparing our Pest Lists, shared a few drinks, and swapped numbers. A week later we fucked, and a month after *that* we realized that we'd Oedipus'd ourselves. It seems funnier now than it did at the time.

That was an emotional time. We cried with joy that we'd found each other, we started tip-toeing around the ideas of rebuilding our lives together, and we agreed to pretend that the sex had never happened. Of course, we got drunk together a week later and fucked again. She's hot! I have a thing for older women, I have a thing for breaking taboos, and I have a thing for being mommied in bed. Blame dad for raising me like this, I dunno.

We started doing sex work as a team after she got a dental abscess. The bill for the hospital stay and the tooth removal was insane, and the dentist straight-up told her that she'd end up with another in a different tooth within a year if she didn't get two root canals. Even when she was recovering, we could only afford fish antibiotics off of Amazon. We crunched some numbers and made some inquiries, and figured out that we could pull in two week's worth of our combined income with one night of mother-daughter stuff.

Our first joint session was with a real estate pervert I'll call Stan, a chubby balding powerlifter in his fifties who we'd both had as a client before. Mom took me over her knees and switched between spanking me and fingering me while he watched. I sucked him off while mom made out with him, made out with my mom with his cock between our lips, licked his balls as mom licked my ass, then let him fuck my ass while mom sat on my face. That was the first half hour. He came six more times before we passed out in the early hours of the morning, and I drifted off nursing his finally-limp cock in my mouth. He paid us the price of a used Volkswagen for our trouble, and I blew him one last time before we left as a thank-you.

Six months later, mom's teeth were fixed, I was on spiro, and we had just under a dozen clients for our "doubles sessions." Only a few of our appointments are ones with me and mom together, three or four a month, we mostly work alone. That's not out of a deliberate choice, it's just that we've got a strict criteria for who we'll double up on.

Trust is one thing: depending on the lawyers we can afford, what we're doing is either kinda illegal or extremely illegal. Since my dad is presumably still a judge, I don't want him to ever find out about this. He'd put us in a prison or a mental institution. We won't do a double session with a client unless we've both had individual sessions with them.

Money is the other thing. Getting your dick sucked by a hot mom while her daughter sucks your balls costs a week's wages for the average person. Hiring us for the night is more like a month's wages. Even in a city like this, there's only a few thousand people that can drop that kind of money on hookers. Then, they've got to *want* to fuck a trans girl and her mom together. Don't get me wrong, more people are into mother-daughter incest than you'd expect, but it's not a universal thing.

Clients are, on average, annoying. It's a fact of life. The thing that all clients have in common is a ton of disposable income and a fondness for fucking hookers. They're not necessarily bad people, but there’s a heavy ‘What can a banana cost, ten dollars?’ vibe to them. It’s not that they’re adrenochrome-drinkers who don’t see regular people as human, it’s more that they don’t have an intuitive awareness that other people don’t have savings accounts, health insurance, an investment property, and four figures of walking-around money at any given time. I guess I'd feel differently if I was like, a concierge or a PA, but there's a lot more pillow talk in my job.

I've had bad and dangerous clients before, there's been at least two occasions where I was pretty sure I was going to die--one where the hospital afterwards stay wiped out four months of income, not counting the month where I couldn’t work--but they were all before I met mom, when I couldn't be so careful about screening prospective clients and dropping them if they threw up red flags. I'm sure we'll get bad clients in the future, but we're in a better place to deal with them safely.

I also wanna write down what a "normal day" is like. Friday was a good example. I woke up early at 9am and cooked breakfast for mom. She was up already doing the laundry. We entertain some clients in our apartment, so we go through a lot of clothes and a lot of sheets. You can't fuck a guy on top of another guy's cum stains, that's rude. Some of the job is Housework But More. We don't really use the main bedroom or the sitting room because we treat them like bed and breakfast guest rooms. It's annoying but every time we have a session without getting an actual hotel or motel room we save like $50 minimum.

After breakfast I epilated, showered, and went for a run. Personal grooming isn't that big a deal in terms of time, I'm not saying I don't spend a lot of time on it, I do, but I'd be spending that time even if I worked in a bar or an office or something. Look: I'm hot. I might have been a weird-looking spotty nerd when I thought I was a boy, but as a girl I'm a fucking dime. I could get like, 25% uglier before it had any impact on my earnings. The only part of personal grooming that's necessary for sex work and I wouldn't do all the time anyway is power-washing my guts an hour before every session.

After lunch, mom went to see some friends and I played Magic for a few hours. At two pm, the actual work started. I picked up the work phone for the first time that day and began answering texts. An hour later I'd cancelled the 6pm appointment, blocked out all of Sunday evening, checked in with a few regulars, and provisionally moved three guys to the 'Time Wasters' list.

I spent a while sexting with a good prospect. He was a good prospect because he paid up-front for the sexting instead of treating it like a free samples platter at Costco. We scheduled a tentative appointment for next Tuesday, when his wife would be out of town on a business trip. Most of the guys I fuck have kinks, and I swear that 'cheating on your wife with a sex worker' is the most common one there is. Do I feel bad about it? At my hourly rate, absolutely not.

Mom got back at half four, so I took a break. We made tacos for lunch together and ate while watching Billions. She nudged me and told me that I need to do my injection, and, well, we have a little ritual for that. I'm scatterbrained and I'm not great with needles, but mom has been incredibly supportive with my HRT, and when I told her I was having problems taking them on time, she came up with a way to make me as comfortable as possible. As soon as the needle is ready, I laid down in her lap and she cradled my head in her arms, pressing her bare chest against my face. I took a nipple into my mouth and nursed it softly while she stroked my hair. She called me a good girl, telling me how proud she is of her daughter, how much she loves me, and asked if I was going to take my medicine like a big girl. On good days I inject myself while she pets me and coos over me, and on bad days she takes the needle and does it for me. As soon as I dropped the needle in the sharps container, mom pressed a Hitachi against my cock and took one of my nipples into her mouth, called me her big brave girl, and asked if I was gonna cum for mommy.

As usual, the answer was yes.

Late afternoon and early evening is when the messages start flowing in, especially on Fridays, when the kinds of people with hooker money have either left work early and thinking about getting laid, or are still held up at work and are desperately thinking about getting laid. This kind of messaging gets trickier, because it comes down to what I'm providing. Like, setting up a session is the kind of normal administrative stuff that's baked into the price of a session. It's also partly a sales job, so I'm naturally flirty and solicitous, and because I do sex work I talk openly about sex.

However, *sexting* is not normal administrative stuff. If I'm sending you messages for jerking-off purposes, I can charge by the hour or by the text but I will insist on charging for it. Also, it's not just sex that me and mom provide. There's a reason that 'companionship' is an old euphemism for whoring, it's because whores are good company. I'm a good listener and I don't judge, which means I'm like the fun parts of a therapist but without all the homework and self-improvement. I'm (unsurprisingly) friendly with all of my clients, and I have more than a few clients and former clients who I'd consider good friends and vice versa. I talk to a bunch of them outside of a business context, especially the ones I met outside of my job, and that's a normal part of maintaining a pool of clients for any sales job, but on the other hand... it's a demand on my time and it's a part of my services. I can and have bluntly told guys that they're wasting my time when it comes to uncompensated sexting, but the platonic stuff requires a lighter touch.

One of my regulars, Fintech Pete, sent me a message. Two messages later, he sent me $100, and we're off. Describing in gratuitous detail exactly how I'm going to suck his cock, begging him to fuck me until my clit is drooling all over the sheets, sending him feet pics, things of that nature. Pete is great for sexting because he barely jerks off while he's doing it, he saves all the messages and pictures and jerks off to them later, because he's got some biohacking routine where he only cums once a week. He said once that part of the reason he hires sex workers is that he takes each nut a lot more seriously if he's paying three digits minimum for the privilege. He does this teleconferencing report with the board of directors at his company four times a year, and every time he hires me to kneel under the desk in his home office and suck him off while he makes his presentation.

Anyway, while we were going back and forth like that, he mentioned that I'd made a joke one time about doing a joint session with my mom. I told him it wasn't a joke, and to cut a long story short, half an hour later I was asking mom if she was up for an overnight session starting at 9pm. She agreed, Pete confirmed, so we both got ready--think getting dolled up for a night out but with a more thorough enema--and drove to his place. He lived outside of town in a two-bedroom suburban home, alone with his two dogs.

As soon as we were parked in his garage I did the safety call in front of him: I rang a friend of mine, told her we were visiting a friend, told her it was at the address I sent her earlier, and told her we'd call her again tomorrow morning. Was it really necessary to do that with someone like Fintech Pete? No, but practice makes permanent. If you let these things slip when there's no danger, eventually they'll slip when there is danger.

Now, I don't want to imply that I'm in a lot of danger! There's a reason that most of the faces you'll see on the Trans Day of Remembrance are of poor black and brown women, because real danger comes when you can't turn skeevy jobs, when you can't afford to take precautions, when you have to make the choice over and over between maybe starving and maybe getting murdered. I'm white, I've got a good support network, and I've been relatively lucky in that I can do all these things to minimize my risks. I've still got to do them, though! Things like safety calls are a good habit to get into and it helps all sex workers if there's an expectation that they've all got someone looking out for them.

...I get that there is some bravado creeping into this journal. I start off saying that admin is the worst part of the job and a page later I flippantly mention that the job has put me in the hospital. On a day to day basis yeah, the admin is the bit that sucks the most, but if you offered me a deal where the admin is twice as bad but I never took that session, I’d take it in a heartbeat. This job has left me with some scars. Any time something cold touches my wrist I get a vivid flash of the first time I had my hands zip-tied behind my back in a cop car. I've had nightmares all my life, and more than a few of my nightmares are about stuff that's happened since I got into sex work.

If it seems like I’m downplaying it, it’s because the harrowing stuff is where the job has gone wrong, it’s not baked into the everyday stuff, and most importantly it has nothing to do with my mom. The work I've done with her is some of the least stressful and dangerous I've had since I started this job, and whatever wounds I have, she's not the one who caused them.

On a more positive note, a cool thing about doing sessions with my mom is that we can dress pretty conservatively and still have it come off as insanely lewd. Mom wore a black cocktail dress with an imitation pearl necklace and her hair up in a bun, I was in a white blouse under a lambswool sweater, a pleated short skirt, cheap dark tights--Pete has a thing for tearing them--and patent leather shoes. When you're going to suck a guy's world entirely off alongside your mom, the more modestly you're dressed, the more perverted it looks. Out in the suburbs it also means you get to avoid the microskirts and fishnets look which screams to the neighbors 'I've just hired a pair of hookers' or the mid-range raincoat over microskirts and fishnets look which screams 'I've just hired a pair of pricey hookers."

Pete's living room looks like the back room of a Radio Shack, computer guts everywhere, every surface turned into a makeshift workbench. It's not a suitable place for lovemaking; I don't want to have to pull shards of a soundcard out of my perineum. His bedroom is a lot neater, with a king-sized bed to sit on, a ton of pillows to lounge up against, and a TV mounted on the wall. Mom poured out some wine, a mid-range red zinfandel that we'd picked up on the way, Pete brought out some imported dark chocolate that costs like $40/kg, and I swung my legs over his lap and turned on the Food Network. I took a bite of chocolate, mom took a sip of wine, and before either of us swallowed she pulled me into a deep kiss, mixing the wine and the chocolate. It's a good combination, and Pete enjoyed the show.

The night started off with chatting. None of us were in any rush, not with an overnight session, and since Pete has been a client for each of us for a while it was a pretty relaxed atmosphere. Pete's fingers danced over my thighs, absent-mindedly plucking ladders into the fabric as we talked baseball, business, sex work, the difference between the gentrified fag bar downtown and the really gentrified fag bar downtown, programming and other nerd shit, local politics, the contestants on Cutthroat Kitchen, just normal stuff. Mom and Pete started talking about fancy cooking stuff so I started annoying them both by claiming that sardines are just fully-grown anchovies, that DOP labels are all fake, and that instant grits are better than the regular ones until mom jabbed me with a finger and told me that my mouth should be put to better use elsewhere.

You know how some people say "Cilantro tastes like soap, that's why it's good?" Same thing for how weird it feels to go down on my mom. The first time I ever jerked off, watching a 144p clip of Rocco Sifreddi fucking a girl in the ass while flushing her head down a toilet bowl, knowing that this meant I was going to go to Hell unless I begged God for forgiveness and never did it again, I came so hard I passed out. It feels good, it feels wrong that it feels so good, and it feels even better because it feels so wrong.

She was already wet when I got between her legs. I kissed her clit and started licking, her bush tickling my nose and her thighs squeezing my ears. Fabric rasped over my head as she hiked her dress up to run her hand through my hair. Everything was muffled but I could hear kissing and clinking, and I knew that mom was undoing Pete's belt and jeans to give him a Catholic-quality handjob.

I got mom worked up, bucking her hips and getting all breathy, until she asked me to get up here and give her some help. I crawled up to his groin and winked up at him. He blushed and grinned back. Pete's not a bad-looking guy. I mean, I don't care about looks in general, I guess I can look at someone and say that objectively they're ugly, and if someone is beautiful it adds something to the experience, but like... it doesn't really figure into it. Obviously most johns don't look like supermodels but they're not uniformly ugly, as I said before the thing that johns have in common is being horny guys with a lot of disposable income. Still, Pete is towards the better-looking side of that scale.

...Okay there is one thing about him that's weirdly common for my clients, I call it 'John Balding:' where a guy is losing his hair but in a slow, uneven, and kinda weird pattern, so that even when they cross into being more bald than not, they never bite the bullet and shave it all off. Pete is only like 30% of the way through that process so it doesn't look terrible yet, but he's on that track.

Anyway, back to the sex. A fun thing about double blowjobs is that you can take them a whole lot slower than solo blowjobs. Me and mom have had a lot of practice so we go at about 1/4th speed and it feels twice as good. She started off by wrapping her hand around the shaft, slowly stroking it while she softly kissed the tip, and I licked his balls, gently lapping at one, then the other, cleaning away the day's sweat and musk, carefully taking both of them into my mouth at once. Mom swallowed half his length, and I started kissing my way up his shaft as she pulled back up, my lips touching the head as hers reached the very tip. She grabbed me by my hair and pulled me into a deep French kiss with his cock in the middle, precum mixing with spit, moaning as we felt him twitch and grunt, mom's hand on his balls and my hand on his shaft. We broke the kiss and repeated it in reverse, taking his cock in my throat as mom kissed her way down to his balls. He came after five minutes of gentle little schoolgirl kisses on each side of his cock from the pair of us. The first rope caught mom on her cheek, the second hit her hair, but I wrapped my lips tight around the head and sucked him dry before he could spill another drop.

You can't give a client a mother-daughter blowjob and not snowball the cum back and forth in front of him. We've done it enough times to get the timing down: wait until he sits up straight, because if you don't he'll be too dazed from nutting in your mouth to really appreciate it. Make sure he's looking at you, move your hair out of the way so it doesn't obstruct his view, open your lips so that a trickle of jizz almost sloshes out, move in close to your mom so that your noses are touching and it's clear that you're about to kiss, sink a palm into her tits as she grabs your ass, and then you gotta really go for it: wide-mouthed, feral, energetic, like you're trying to reach each other's sinuses. If a little bit of cum spills out because you're being so sloppy, that's a sign that you're doing it right. You're going to lick it up afterwards anyway.

We broke the kiss, I licked mom's face clean, and we took a break. We drank some more wine, he offered us cigarettes--the coolest clients are the ones that let you smoke indoors--and we cuddled and relaxed for a while with Guy's Grocery Games playing on the TV. Pete went to get some water, and returned with three bottles and a strip of Cialis. He downed two pills, we both stripped off--it was sweltering by that point--and got ready for the next round.

Mom played with his nipples and I got between his legs again, this time going lower than his balls to eat his ass out. Rimming is a trusted client privilege like the mom-daughter stuff is, except it's less about trusting them in the legal sense and more about trusting that it won't be grainy down there. I like it when a client is clean enough to rim, because I'm extremely good at it. Mom says she's better, she claims she once made a guy no-touch cum with a rimjob, but I don't fucking believe her.

He got hard after a minute of digging my tongue into his ass, but his cock was still super-sensitive so we figured we'd tease him for a while longer. We swapped places, mom ate his ass while he made out with me, squeezing my tits and playing with my cock. I like it when guys touch my tits, my cock is... fine, I guess? I don't viscerally dislike people touching it but it doesn't do much for me. After a minute of that he reaches around and works a finger into my asshole, which is much more my speed.

By the time he was two knuckles deep I looked down and saw his cock twitching, leaking precum onto his stomach. He seemed pretty worked up. I kissed his neck, nipped at his ear, and whispered, "Do you wanna breed me, Mister?"

He sure did.

I use condoms unless I've got an extremely compelling reason not to, and mom has a cool trick for getting them on. She grasped Pete's cock around the base, placed her lips around the tip, deepthroated the entire thing in a single stroke, and as she slowly lifted her head back up, his cock was neatly fitted with a condom.

As soon as I lubed up he put me on my back, pushed my ankles up to my ears,  pressed his cock against my hole and sunk into me inch by inch. He muffled my moans with a kiss and rutted me into the bed. I gotta give it to him, all that biohacking and cardio is doing something right because he railed me at a fast, steady pace until my dick was leaking all over my tummy and I couldn't form sentences in my head any more. Mom made out with him as he finished, and at that point I was just babbling nonsense. He was gentle and cautious as he pulled out of me, stroking my hair as I reached down to take off his condom. I poured the contents out over my tits, slumping back against the headboard as mom licked them clean.

It wasn't yet midnight by then, and we went on like that through the night. Licking his feet, mom-daughter 69, him sucking my cock while mom rode his dick like a Sorority cowgirl champion, more wine, more double-blowjobs, tacking an extra $200 onto the fee for the privilege of pissing in my mouth instead of having to get up to go to the bathroom, a whole buffet of fun whore stuff.

We woke up at around ten in the morning, stayed for breakfast, then said our goodbyes. Me and mom thanked him for his custom, and he thanked us for a good time. By midday we were at home, we both showered, checked our calendars, messaged our evening clients to confirm that they were still on, and then... well, the rest of the day kinda evaporated. I played Demons' Souls until I couldn't keep my eyes open any longer, passed out in bed, and woke up when my alarm went off in the evening.

That's one of the things I don't like about overnight sessions: you're technically only spending like, ten to twelve hours with a client, and for some of that time you're either not fucking or actively asleep, but it kinda feels like it destroys two days. By the time it's scheduled, everything in the rest of the day is either preparing for it or doing it, and when you get back it takes the rest of the day just to recover. I don't like that part of my job, and if I sit down I can probably go through a whole bunch of things I don't like about my job. I still know that my job isn't a *bad* job, because the last time I had a bad job it was at a chicken processing plant. Know how I know that the chicken job was bad? Because I excused myself for a bathroom break four hours into the shift, walked off site, and never came back.

You know what, there's another reason I know that this isn't a bad job and that mom isn't a bad mom, and I guess it's part of the reason I've written all this down in the first place. I was seven years old when I first wanted to die. By the time I got to high school, suicidal thoughts were just the radio static in my brain. I can't remember any point after like, grade school where I didn't daydream about suicide every single day.

Now? I sometimes go for weeks without thinking about killing myself. It hasn't gone away completely, it still pops up when I'm upset or stressed out or tired or really hungry, but what I do is I talk to mom about it, and she talks me out of it. I feel guilty sometimes about putting that pressure on her, and taking that pressure off is part of the reason I'm going to therapy I guess.

I hope it works out.

I really think it will.

[thelightofthingshopedfor]

just once, just fucking once I would like to have a reasonably productive long weekend instead of spending most of it too stuck in decision paralysis to actually do much of anything until I reach a point where I feel like I could very well break down crying because I’m too overwhelmed with everything I need to do but I still don’t actually do most of it because the decision paralysis is a huge part of what makes me so fucking overwhelmed in the first place

like. right now probably the most urgent thing is a semi-complicated Etsy commission that the buyer would ideally receive by Dec. 10, which probably means sending it Dec. 7 at the absolute latest. so I should be working on that, right? but it’s going to take a while so it’s a time commitment, especially because it seems kind of pointless to get out a lot of messy supplies to only work on it for a few minutes. and I need to order parts for a different order--well, at least that’s quick. I also really need to reapply thermal paste to my CPU as soon as I can because I think the fan’s getting louder and that can’t be good for anything in there, and theoretically it won’t be that hard, but realistically I’m sure it’s going to take a while and I have to look up a little info on how to do it, first--and it involves my PC being out of commission while I’m working on it, so that’s not something I can do halfway. and while my PC’s open I really need to replace my dead hard drive, which wouldn’t be that hard except I want to install the new one alongside the old one so I can try to clone the dead one onto the new one, which will definitely take time on both the hardware and software sides of things, but it needs to happen sooner rather than later because, again, there’s a lot of stuff I can’t do until I get that done. and I need to send the recent invoices for Hazy’s dental appointment to pet insurance to see if they’ll pay anything, and that should be quick, but nothing ever stays simple. and, shit, I should really do some actual work this weekend because I didn’t get enough done before...and I still need to decide what to do about the vision therapy thing now that it’s clear the best they can do for me is a payment plan for like 36 expensive appointments, ugh. and ah shit I signed up for Yuletide and I’ve done almost nothing, and that’s due...Dec. 17? fuck, that reminds me, I gotta go get a new notebook from my room because I just finished this one, I mean that’s quick and easy but it also means I now have two notebooks that mostly aren’t typed up, which is bad because I can’t do anything with the contents until they’re typed up and of course they’re not backed up (unless I put them in my fireproof safe, and then I’d never get them typed), and typing those is going to take forever, and yeah I’ve been meaning to make it easier on myself by just doing like 15 minutes a day but I haven’t done that at all and they really need to get typed--and, well, I could just do a 15-minute stint, sure, but that seems silly when there’s so much that needs to be done--and, ugh, I’ve sorta been ignoring my email for the last three days and I need to go through that because otherwise I’m guaranteed to miss something I won’t want to miss, but that takes time and it’s going to mean opening up more tabs when there are already too many tabs open (there are always too many tabs open) and I need to deal with those too, and a good share of the emails are probably about Black Friday sales that I’ll probably want to do but that means more tabs and more decisions and shit there’s all that stuff in my Etsy cart that I should really buy sooner rather than later because sometimes Etsy stuff disappears or sells out and then I’ll be sad and frustrated with myself and also some of the things I want to buy are for gifts, which reminds me that I have almost no Christmas gifts yet for anybody, and my birthday is soon so I should probably make some kind of list myself but actually why am I focusing on that at all when the Georgia runoff elections that determine Senate control are in barely more than a month and I need to be writing letters/postcards to voters since I don’t want to phonebank and time zones actually make it really impractical anyway? I was going to do that in a reasonable way this time too, just a few letters a day like I meant to before, use up a lot of these stamps and stuff I still have--and ah fuck it’s been a while since I’ve called my own legislators about anything, I need to do that, that’s theoretically quick because voicemails cut me off at two minutes, although to be able to do that I also have to do at least a little research so I know what’s the most important thing to call about and what to say so that’s more tabs and more time, and I still haven’t fucking reposted the tiny little Endgame fix-it fic I wrote at the end of August, let alone finished anything since then

and I would, on some level, like to work on one of the many, many writing projects that is theoretically close to being done, or one of the recent ones I started because I foolishly and incorrectly thought it was something I could bang out quickly

and on some level I would also like to work on more stuff for Etsy that could be pre-made so it’s not another stress point when I get orders, especially because several things are holiday-specific and some wouldn’t even take that long, but I’d still be choosing to do those instead of more urgent things

and none of that even begins to touch other stuff, like my room that continues to be a disaster and I need to sort through my shit so I know whether I can relist my most popular Etsy item (if I even want to, which I don’t right now because stress), not to mention all the stuff I need to clear out by listing on eBay, and I could do at least one part of that (flatten the boxes I’ve saved for shipping) without committing to a week-long project but even that part would take a solid chunk of time that I should be spending on something more urgent

and we can’t even put up the fucking tree until I move some of my shit away from the spot where the tree goes, which is tough because a lot of it is from work or otherwise theoretically temporary stuff that doesn’t have an actual home, so that’s going to take a while, and then putting up the tree is also going to take a while, and my room is already a disaster so I’d need to clean in there to make room, which would take forever, and for that matter my areas of the living room are generally a disaster too, as always

and while I’m thinking about stuff I brought from work, let’s go back to how I need to do some work stuff because I’m lucky enough to have a decent job with good insurance that can be done from home and I’m still just like...kiiiiiiinda endangering that by not being a functional adult in general? which is at least partly because my brain is a dumpster fire that doesn’t seem to be improving (which is something else to worry about) but regardless of the cause I still have to do something about it? oh yes and speaking of the good insurance I’m kinda endangering by being a fuckup, haha sure hope this knot under my jaw doesn’t turn out to be...you know, the type of bad thing that a knot under the jaw could turn out to be! which is another very good reason I need to stop being a fuckup so I’m not maybe endangering the job that would pay for that, along with all my other medical issues! and also the entirety of our rent because my mom’s really high-risk and the only available jobs she’s qualified for aren’t safe for her to do!

and my knee hurts! and my elbow hurts! and my neck fucking hurts, my head and neck always hurt and I think I’ve been sleeping even worse than usual lately, partly because neck pain and partly just my body fucking hates me, it’s always a problem and I don’t know what to do about it anymore

and now it’s after 8:30 pm and obviously I’ve done none of this, and I’m still tired, and my head and neck still hurt, and there are still so many things I need to do but I can’t choose because the time-consuming things are the urgent ones but I don’t have the time or energy for them and choosing a specific thing (an urgent time-consuming thing, or a less urgent but much quicker thing) means actively choosing not to do one of the other things, and it’s all important, and I can’t fucking choose, and I’m pretty much at a point where I can continue running ever more painful and crazy-making circles in my brain trying to make myself decide something or I can say “fuck it” and do something that would be fun but not urgent or important at all, which I shouldn’t do, so for fuck’s sake I should just pick even one productive thing to do and then maybe let myself do something fun and then get to bed at a good time for fucking once but I still can’t fucking choose and I want to either cry, scream, or possibly hurt myself, and none of this is healthy or productive

and I think possibly my therapist is getting impatient with me for not making much progress and not really having specific goals for our sessions aside from “I hate that my brain is Like This and I want it to not be Like This and no I haven’t done most of the things you’ve suggested and no I don’t have a good reason why, I just want the meds to work so everything won’t be so fucking hard and yes I know that wouldn’t be something you could control even if it was in your wheelhouse, which it isn’t, but I get overwhelmed so fast and I know I need to do better and be better but I don’t know how”

and I wrote this instead of actually doing anything, apparently, because there was at least some chance that dumping it all out would make me feel better or help me see more clearly what I actually need to do, but I think I actually made myself feel worse by articulating just how overwhelmed I am, mostly by things that objectively aren’t actually that difficult or important.

and I still can’t fucking choose.

[sealpup9]

Important things I've noticed/realized in living in a late-stage capitalist dystopia:

-The common practice of "exaggerating ridiculously on your resume" is definitely a way that companies ensure that they can keep pushing for a higher and higher level of expertise/years in the service. Unfortunately doing so is the only way to be considered for a job.

-the concept of "there will always be someone else out there who will replace you" should not be another thing we use to put ourselves down/accept lower than living-wage jobs. Instead. Try to think of it as "this company is part of the problem that caused the fact that people are starving/living paycheck to paycheck" because that's the reality.

-Companies that don't have a proper phone number to call when you require customer service are using that as a means to not properly help every customer. A common practice is the 'chatbot': one that gives you a specific set of queries and offers no room for understanding or misinterpretation. Someone who may need help with a product may not be able to identify the problem/issue and not having a representative to speak to is a major red flag! Also note the companies that only link to self-help forums. They are making sure that they cover themselves up by "providing proper support" while not paying any support representatives. Using these forums to find your answer and interacting with them is providing free labor to that company.

-Food Allergens are not taken seriously in the food industry. Most companies just print 'may contain [allergen]' and no further information. They are allowed to do this becausd technically they are warning. They are also allowed to change these labels at any time and provide no warning for people who buy their food/products. Seeing a more thorough allergen label (example: "Made on the same equipment that processes Coconut and Almond") is a good sign! That means that instead of using the term "tree nuts" as a catch all (because many people who are allergic to tree nuts are not allergic to *all* tree nuts) they are actually listing off potential allergens. Unfortunately, this practice isn't common, in fact it's more common to see on overpriced organic foods than it is on your everyday foods. I also want to point out that in the U.S., it is legal for a company to not list all their ingredients if it falls under the category of "spices". Our food industry cares more about potential recipes being copied than individual people who have allergies. Spice allergies can be just as deadly as Tree Nut Allergies.

-The fact that so many people (myself included) rely on college and debt for a roof over their head and food on their table while getting a necissary education (yes. College is necessary. See my first point if you forgot) is a means to keep the poor poor. There is a reason the main things the US Military promotes is 'money for college' and 'housing'- because if you're going to be homeless and starving, they can at least get you to do their slave work for a few years before you burn out or die!

PRO TIPS:

-If you are on some kind of insurance for low-income and you need a prescription- (at least where I am)- if you have a co-pay it is usually around 1$. However, if you can not pay this: (and let me tell you, there are times when 1$ makes a difference) kindly ask if it is possible for them to wave the fee. They wont ask for some kind of excuse, they can see what insurance you are on.

-Always call when you are running late for an appointment. More often than not they are kind and happy you give them a heads up, that way there is no hold-up when you show up 15 minutes late, and everyone is happy.

-Floss your teeth. Look, it sucks and its difficult, but a few dollars a month on floss and a few minutes of your day will keep you from being thousands in debt from dental bills.

-Make a shopping list for groceries, pin it on your fridge and tape a pen on a rubber band if you have to. You will forget something otherwise.

-Don't let dishes pile up. If you *really* need to, make sure you rinse as much food as you can off of it with hot water (or fill the pot with water ad a little dish soap) trust me it will save you. (Side Note: when washing dishes, treat the other sides of plates/bowls the same as the surface you would be eating off of. Odds are you'll be stacking them, so the bottoms will touch the surface of another)

-If you get frequent headaches, drink more water. Invest in a pitcher with a water filter and keep it filled in your fridge. Surprisingly you don't have to replace te filter too often! Just remember if there isn't enough left in it for a full glass to fill it up again!

-Frozen Fruits and Veggies are your friends. Especially if you struggle for whatever reason with preparing food. Oatmeal and boxed pasta are also pretty cheap!

-if you can't afford a toaster or toaster oven: Get a cheap waffle maker. My fiancee and i have been using a pokemon-themed waffle maker for over a year now and it works just as well. Plus, if you want waffles, you have the option!

-keep the bag/box before you throw it out, odds are you're going to need to reference it for instructions.

-buying bulk is good for stuff like sponges, dish soap. Laundry detergent. Thinfs you know you will use. Perishables are a bit iffy, but canned foods can last a while and you'll be set.

-read the chemicals in your cleaning supplies. Keep Bleach away from Lysol, etc.

-Keep a written addressbook with phone numbers. If something happens to your phone. You'll still have your contacts.

-For the love of god invest in an umbrella and keep it in your car. It seems dumb but I didn't bother for years and now I just keep one in my car.

-Wal-mart has 15$ lamps. Good for college dorms/apts. Don't boyher with the "dorm sale" stuff at placez like Target: it's all overpriced.

-Have two pairs of sheets for your bed! If you get sick, the last thing you want is to have to do laundry because your sheets are dirty.

[yewpvc9]

Purchase Laser Teeth Whitening

Content

Why Pick Teeth Whitening Treatment?

Cost Of Laser Teeth Whitening.

Teeth Whitening In Stockwell.

What Is The Teeth Whitening Procedure?

Teeth Whitening Portishead.

The Laser Whitening system is used by our star customers at our Central London dental practice very frequently. A few thousand to date, every one of the done by our leading aesthetic dental practitioner Dr. Mahsa Shoaei with the aid of our extremely qualified dental registered nurse Amy Bonner at our Central London Oral Practice. Tooth whitening is a safe process and there will certainly be no permanent damage caused to the enamel. Commonly you can expect whitening to last as much as 2 years, however, it will depend on the person. For the best results, it is suggested to stay clear of coffee, merlot and cigarette smoking as these all create staining of the teeth. This consists of Phillips Zoom Whitening, Enlighten Whitening and our very own Ollie as well as Darsh Home Whitening sets.

How To Whiten Teeth At Home: Best Whitening Tips & Products - The Cut

How To Whiten Teeth At Home: Best Whitening Tips & Products.

Posted: Tue, 12 May 2020 07:00:00 GMT [source]

The good news is, cosmetic oral job gives simple solutions for numerous common problems. If you need to offer on your own a better smile, cosmetic dental job will certainly probably be the most effective method to take into consideration.

Why do my teeth look more yellow after whitening?

When our tooth enamel grows thin, it slowly exposes the dentin, giving it a yellowish color. It's not uncommon to notice your teeth growing yellow as you grow older. If you find some of your teeth growing white while other parts are turning yellow after whitening, it might be a sign that you've got thin tooth enamel.

Why Pick Teeth Whitening Treatment?

If you do not rinse or comb your teeth after each dish, treat, and beverage, these deposits will certainly show gradually in the form of dullness or yellowing. In addition to food, cigarette will trigger teeth to transform colour over time. Made use of to battle innate spots, your dentist in Lewisham will apply bleach inside your discolored tooth and also seal it off with a momentary filling. The bleach will be left to work and the filling up will be removed numerous days later. You may need more than one treatment to attain your desired outcomes. Each time you utilize the gel with the trays in your home you'll see an enhancement as well.

Your trays will certainly last for years if they are taken care of and you will certainly have the ability to purchase further gel from us. You will begin to discover outcomes right away but we suggest extension of the treatment for 2-4 weeks to get the maximum white teeth result for you. You take the trays and also gel house as well as wear them over night and also for simply a couple of hours throughout the day. aspirewhite teeth whitening wolverhampton are light as well as comfortable as well as shouldn't cause any kind of issues. Laser Teeth Whitening is a whitening system that lightens the discolouration of enamel and also dentin. You may have seen Laser Whitening being utilized in programs like Extreme Makeover and America's following leading version.

The only factor of note is that about 60% of patients will experience short-lived level of sensitivity to hot/cold which vanishes after the therapy has ended up. The session contains about 10mins assessment followed by 50mins therapy. If teeth are dark, a second session is suggested approx one week apart. Teeth whitening will not affect your enamel or have any damaging result on your teeth or mouth. Some people have reported that their teeth are a lot more conscious cold for a brief period of time after the therapy.

The best teeth whitening strip of 2020 - Chicago Tribune

The best teeth whitening strip of 2020.

Posted: Sat, 26 Sep 2020 07:00:00 GMT [source]

Your present voucher will certainly be sent out to you by recorded delivery within a couple of days or can be accumulated on site. Smileright ™ preventative oral treatment as well as hygiene clinics in stores throughout the UK.

Many of our individuals select to have their teeth whitened in order to remove spots as well as obtain a brighter looking smile which still has a natural appearance. We offer an expert whitening solution for clients looking to attain a brighter and also extra appealing smile, please contact us for even more details. " Many thanks for the lovely white teeth. What a lovely instant outcome. I feel terrific and also a lot more positive to grin when conference good friends, family as well as at the workplace." This Present Bundle remains in the form of a Coupon with silver envelope. Coupons stand for one year as well as can be retrieved at Smile Technology, Bluewater, versus the laser and trays therapy.

Expense Of Laser Teeth Whitening.

We are based in Stratford upon avon with individual auto parking onsite. Therapy is normally upto 1 hr & you will see the results straitght away.

Teeth Whitening In Stockwell.

What Is The Teeth Whitening Procedure?

If you aer aiming to get your teeth lightened with a fase, efficient in-practice treatment ZOOM! Personalised bleaching trays and bleaching gel are both consisted of in the cost ofZoom. Your dental professional will recommend you to try and stay clear of specific foods as well as beverages which stains your teeth whilst you whiten them. If your positive self-image is affected by the look of your teeth, you might be taking into consideration bridges. Your Parkside Dental Care dental professional can aid you accomplish a lovely smile without extensive orthodontics. Our group will produce a prepare for you personally that is completely distinct of what you would certainly such as, as well as will match your existing attributes.

The dental practitioner will certainly then apply the therapy to remove any stains or discolourations, providing you a brighter, whiter smile.

The GDC has actually communicated with those who manage the insurance industry to try and also make certain that these kind of policies are not offered or sold to unregistered specialists.

Just like any kind of therapy, there are benefits as well as threats, and also your Ringley Park dental expert will certainly describe these plainly throughout your teeth whitening appointment.

Teeth whitening has existed for more than 100 years as well as is one of the most preferred cosmetic dental care procedures worldwide.

With the assistance of today's technologies, teeth whitening has come a lengthy way and also is a superb method to remove discolouration and stains from your teeth.

there are online teeth whitening tamworth can either make one to 2 appointments with the surgery for your whitening therapy.

Recent research study suggests that using whitening gel near to the soft cells of the mouth is secure.

We run the fifty percent price deal throughout the year, as our company believe in making oral therapy affordable and available. Lots of clients searching for cosmetic treatment do not become aware the number of choices there are for grownups that desire to correct their teeth. There are no long-term dangerous effects of this procedure, no teeth are worn down or deteriorated and also the soft tissues stay healthy.

Teeth Whitening Brand Ghost White Introduces New Social Media Challenge: The Ghost Squad - GlobeNewswire

Teeth Whitening Brand Ghost White Introduces New Social Media Challenge: The Ghost Squad.

Posted: Wed, 19 Aug 2020 07:00:00 GMT [source]

The laser functions to accelerate or activate the bleaching process. I was fortunate adequate to go and see Harley Street dental professional Dr Richard Marques aka 'The King of Smiles'. On my first visit, he took a perception of my teeth using what seemed like cold strawberry flavoured clay and afterwards sent it off to make trays that would certainly fit my teeth flawlessly. Over the last few years, I had actually seen myself ending up being progressively insecure concerning my teeth. I knew after seeing my poor sister's toes crinkle in the dental professional's chair on numerous occasions that I was lucky that I 'd never needed dental braces or dental fillings however I would certainly never ever had gleaming white teeth. The truth is that few individuals do due to the fact that the real world isn't such as Instagram, specifically if, like me, you're a merlot and also black coffee follower.

Teeth Whitening Portishead.

Impacts are taken of the mouth to generate customised bleaching trays which flawlessly fit the teeth. The teeth color can certainly beginning to go darker once again in time due to our eating and drinking practices, for that reason it is usual for clients to cover up on their treatment every so often. Obtain a bright, white smile in Bristol today by booking an appointment with the Oral Touch. Your Freeman & Rosser Dental & Implant Facility dentist can aid you achieve a gorgeous smile without lengthy orthodontics.

When I stood up, ever before so glamorously eliminating my saliva covered trays I was apprehensive concerning the results. As soon as I looked in the mirror I was really overwhelmed by how much happier I was with my teeth and also anybody that understands me will bear witness the truth that I am not quickly satisfied. I laid there, trying not to trick which is no mean accomplishment due to the fact that I have an over active gag response, and the laser worked its magic.

Our target at Smileright ™ is to make certain that after a see to our oral facility you will certainly entrust to a bright healthy and balanced smile that fills you with self-confidence. Cosmetic stain elimination using Air flow polishing is more advanced than a basic scale as well as polish; it leaves clients with same-day cleaner, brighter teeth. It entails making use of a combination of jet water, air as well as sodium bicarbonate to tidy teeth, and also is usually done by the Hygienist. It is a risk-free treatment as no chemicals are used, consequently no danger to any kind of irritability. Baby teeth often tend to be a brighter shade of white than grown-up teeth. Though genetics will establish the illumination of enamel, one of the most typical consider teeth palling as well as discoloured are food as well as beverages. What you drink and eat every day, from fruits to juice to coffee or white wine, will deposit little bits of colour onto teeth.

A knowledgeable aesthetic oral expert will certainly make every individual's smile fantastic, but likewise distinct and also a great deal extra actual looking than in the past. If you've obtained particular needs for the treatment, we can finish a selection of services to fit each of our unique people. There are numerous variables that might influence exactly how your smile looks, and also not everyone is blessed with the best smile.

What is the best teeth whitening method?

Option #1: In-Office Laser Whitening This is one of the popular teeth whitening methods that some people believe is the most effective way to get a brighter smile. Using lasers and peroxide-based whitening agents in a professional setting, this teeth whitening method provides dramatic, lasting results.

Any type of symptoms will certainly be short-term and also will go away after a few days of conclusion of the treatment. Appearance counts a great deal in the way that individuals judge us, as well as a bright smile is just one of the initial things that is seen by others. centrally manage teeth whitening birmingham - aspirewhite.co.uk is a brighter and whiter smile much more gorgeous and self-confidence boosting but it can leave a memorable as well as long lasting impact. Once the treatment is complete, you need to be careful what you eat and drink for the initial 48 hours, as the pores in your teeth will certainly be open and prone to stains. Similarly, you may experience a slight warm sensation on your lips during the laser treatment so do not hesitate to alert the dental expert as well as they'll adjust it. After he has actually installed the cheek retractor to maintain the mouth open wide, Dr Richard shows me a series of teeth differing from natural white all the way as much as the brightest white possible.

[quailbeef3]

Teeth Whitening In Surgical Treatment

Content

Why Pick Teeth Whitening Treatment?

Expense Of Laser Teeth Whitening.

Teeth Whitening In Stockwell.

What Is The Teeth Whitening Procedure?

Teeth Whitening Portishead.

Where Can I Get More Info For My Clients?

The Laser Whitening system is made use of by our celeb customers at our Central London oral practice extremely frequently. A couple of thousand to date, every one of the done by our leading cosmetic dentist Dr. Mahsa Shoaei with the aid of our very qualified dental registered nurse Amy Bonner at our Central London Oral Practice. Tooth whitening is a safe process as well as there will certainly be no permanent damages created to the enamel. Commonly you can anticipate whitening to last approximately two years, however, it will certainly depend upon the person. For the very best outcomes, it is advised to stay clear of coffee, red wine as well as smoking cigarettes as these all trigger staining of the teeth. This includes Phillips Zoom Whitening, Enlighten Whitening and also our extremely own Ollie and also Darsh House Whitening kits.

How To Whiten Teeth At Home: Best Whitening Tips & Products - The Cut

How To Whiten Teeth At Home: Best Whitening Tips & Products.

Posted: Tue, 12 May 2020 07:00:00 GMT [source]

Fortunately, aesthetic dental work gives easy remedies for numerous typical concerns. If you require to offer yourself a better smile, aesthetic oral job will certainly probably be the best approach to consider.

Why do my teeth look more yellow after whitening?

When our tooth enamel grows thin, it slowly exposes the dentin, giving it a yellowish color. It's not uncommon to notice your teeth growing yellow as you grow older. If you find some of your teeth growing white while other parts are turning yellow after whitening, it might be a sign that you've got thin tooth enamel.

Why Pick Teeth Whitening Treatment?

If you do not wash or brush your teeth after each meal, treat, and also beverage, these deposits will certainly show in time in the form of monotony or yellowing. Along with food, cigarette will certainly trigger teeth to transform colour over time. Made use of to deal with inherent stains, your dental practitioner in Lewisham will apply bleach inside your stained tooth and seal it off with a momentary dental filling. The bleach will certainly be delegated work and also the filling will certainly be gotten rid of several days later on. You may require more than one treatment to attain your wanted outcomes. Whenever you utilize the gel with the trays in the house you'll observe a renovation too.

Your trays will last for many years if they are cared for and you will certainly have the ability to buy additional gel from us. You will certainly start to see outcomes immediately however we suggest continuation of the treatment for 2-4 weeks to obtain the optimal white teeth result for you. You take the trays and gel home and also use them overnight as well as for simply a few hrs during the day. The trays are light and comfy as well as shouldn't trigger any type of problems. Laser Teeth Whitening is a lightening system that lightens the discolouration of enamel and also dentin. You might have seen Laser Whitening being utilized in shows like Extreme Remodeling and America's next top version.

The only factor of note is that about 60% of individuals will experience temporary sensitivity to hot/cold which disappears after the therapy has actually completed. The session contains about 10mins assessment complied with by 50mins therapy. If teeth are dark, a 2nd session is advised approx one week apart. Teeth whitening will not affect your enamel or have any type of detrimental result on your teeth or mouth. Some individuals have reported that their teeth are much more conscious chilly for a short amount of time after the therapy.

The best teeth whitening strip of 2020 - Chicago Tribune

The best teeth whitening strip of 2020.

Posted: Sat, 26 Sep 2020 07:00:00 GMT [source]

Your gift coupon will certainly be sent out to you by videotaped distribution within a number of days or can be collected on site. Smileright ™ preventative dental treatment and hygiene centers in shops throughout the UK.

Most of our individuals choose to have their teeth whitened in order to get rid of spots and obtain a brighter looking smile which still has an all-natural appearance. We offer an expert whitening solution for people wanting to attain a brighter as well as much more appealing smile, please get in touch for even more details. " Thanks for the wonderful white teeth. What a beautiful immediate result. I feel excellent as well as extra certain to smile when conference buddies, family as well as at work." This Present Plan remains in the type of a Coupon with silver envelope. Coupons are valid for one year as well as can be retrieved at Smile Tech, Bluewater, against the laser and trays therapy.

Price Of Laser Teeth Whitening.

We are based in Stratford upon avon with patient car parking onsite. Therapy is typically upto 1 hour & you will certainly see the outcomes straitght away.

Teeth Whitening In Stockwell.

How can I make my yellow teeth white in one day?

Here are 6 simple ways you can naturally whiten your teeth. 1. Practice oil pulling. 2. Brush with baking soda. 3. Use hydrogen peroxide. 4. Eat fruits and vegetables. 5. Prevent tooth stains before they happen. teeth whitening hampshire br/> 6. Don't underestimate the value of brushing and flossing.

What Is The Teeth Whitening Procedure?

If you aer looking to obtain your teeth whitened with a fase, effective in-practice therapy ZOOM! Customised lightening trays and also lightening gel are both included in the cost ofZoom. Your dentist will suggest you to try and also stay clear of specific foods and also drinks which stains your teeth whilst you lighten them. If your self-confidence is affected by the appearance of your teeth, you might be considering bridges. Your Parkside Dental Treatment dentist can help you attain a beautiful smile without extensive orthodontics. Our team will create a prepare for you directly that is entirely distinct wherefore you would such as, and will match your existing functions.

The dental practitioner will certainly after that apply the treatment to eliminate any type of spots or discolourations, giving you a brighter, whiter smile.

Any kind of insurance coverage purchased in these scenarios will certainly be void.

Similar to any type of treatment, there are benefits as well as risks, and also your Ringley Park dental practitioner will certainly explain these clearly during your teeth whitening appointment.

Teeth whitening has existed for more than 100 years and is one of one of the most popular cosmetic dental care procedures worldwide.

With the help of today's innovations, teeth whitening has actually come a lengthy means and also is an exceptional method to get rid of discolouration and spots from your teeth.

https://www.lateethwhitening.co.uk/leicester/ can either make one to 2 consultations with the surgical treatment for your whitening therapy.

In general, teeth whitening is the excellent remedy to achieve your own brighter, whiter and also excellent smile.

Current research study shows that making use of whitening gel near the soft tissues of the mouth is safe.

We run the fifty percent rate offer throughout the year, as we believe in making dental treatment economical and also accessible. Many customers searching for cosmetic therapy do not know the amount of alternatives there are for grownups who want to correct their teeth. There are no long term unsafe effects of this procedure, no teeth are worn down or worn off and the soft tissues remain healthy.

The laser functions to speed up or trigger the bleaching procedure. I was fortunate adequate to go and see Harley Street dental expert Dr Richard Marques also known as 'The King of Smiles'. On my very first browse through, he took a perception of my teeth using what felt like cool strawberry flavoured clay and then sent it off to make trays that would fit my teeth perfectly. In recent times, I had actually discovered myself ending up being increasingly troubled regarding my teeth. I understood after seeing my inadequate sibling's toes crinkle in the dental expert's chair on numerous occasions that I was fortunate that I would certainly never ever required dental braces or fillings but I would certainly never ever had shimmering white teeth. The fact is that couple of individuals do due to the fact that reality isn't such as Instagram, specifically if, like me, you're a red wine as well as black coffee follower.

Impressions are taken of the mouth to produce specialised lightening trays which perfectly fit the teeth. The teeth color can certainly start to go darker once more in time because of our consuming and also alcohol consumption habits, consequently it is common for patients to cover up on their therapy once in awhile. Get an intense, white smile in Bristol today by scheduling a visit with the Dental Touch. Your Freeman & Rosser Dental & Implant Center dental expert can aid you achieve a gorgeous smile without lengthy orthodontics.

When I stood, ever before so glamorously eliminating my saliva covered trays I feared regarding the results. As quickly as I looked in the mirror I was truly bewildered by just how much happier I was with my teeth and also any person that recognizes me will testify to the reality that I am not conveniently amazed. I laid there, trying not to trick which is no mean feat since I have an over active gag reflex, and also the laser functioned its magic.

Our focus on Smileright ™ is to ensure that after a check out to our dental facility you will certainly entrust to a brilliant healthy smile that fills you with self-confidence. Cosmetic discolor removal utilizing Airflow polishing is more advanced than a simple scale as well as gloss; it leaves individuals with same-day cleaner, brighter teeth. It entails utilizing a combination of jet water, air as well as salt bicarbonate to clean teeth, and is generally done by the Hygienist. It is a secure procedure as no chemicals are utilized, for that reason no risk to any type of inflammation. Primary teeth tend to be a brighter color of white than adult teeth. Though genes will determine the brightness of enamel, one of the most typical factors in teeth palling and discoloured are food and beverages. What you eat and drink each day, from fruits to juice to coffee or white wine, will transfer tiny particles of colour onto teeth.

An experienced aesthetic oral practitioner will make every individual's smile excellent, but likewise unique as well as a lot a lot more actual looking than ever before. If you have actually got certain demands for the treatment, we can complete a selection of services to match each of our distinct clients. There are several aspects that may affect precisely how your smile looks, and not everyone is honored with the excellent smile.

What is the best teeth whitening method?

Option #1: In-Office Laser Whitening This is one of the popular teeth whitening methods that some people believe is the most effective way to get a brighter smile. Using lasers and peroxide-based whitening agents in a professional setting, this teeth whitening method provides dramatic, lasting results.

Any symptoms will be short-lived and also will certainly vanish after a few days of conclusion of the treatment. Appearance counts a lot in the manner in which people evaluate us, and also an intense smile is among the first points that is discovered by others. Not only is a brighter as well as whiter smile a lot more beautiful and also confidence enhancing yet it can leave an unforgettable and long-term perception. As soon as the treatment is total, you need to beware what you drink and eat for the very first 2 days, as the pores in your teeth will be open and also prone to stains. Similarly, you may experience a mild warm sensation on your lips throughout the laser therapy so do not hesitate to inform the dental practitioner as well as they'll readjust it. After he has actually set up the cheek retractor to keep the mouth open wide, Dr Richard reveals me a range of teeth differing from all-natural white completely up to the brightest white conceivable.

[f0x-meets-w0lf]

please read (if you have a lil time)

hey my pals, so i never really thought i’d be the type of person to do this, but i’ve mentioned starting up a patreon/ko-fi/paypal link a few times in the past and was met with enthusiasm and support (because y’all are angels). i know that at this point posting on tumblr is basically equivalent to yelling into a dark cavernous void and hoping someone else hears, but... it’s the only place i really have, haha. twitter stresses me tf out and tumblr is all i’ve known for like 10+ years; the great tumblrocalypse can’t deter this ol’ tumblrer.

SO anyway, here’s the deal - being an independent adult in los angeles is expe$$$ive af and my life gets increasingly more insane and stressful as my career continues to grow. it’s an honor and a humbling blessing to be busy, of course, but it has come at a price -- my ability to do much of anything else is very limited, and tattooing is an expensive job. needles and tubes cost a shit ton, ink costs a shit ton, machines cost a shit ton, everything costs a shit ton. and on top of my daily job expenses, i’m in the process of trying to open a private studio, which is def going to save me some money and sanity in the long run, but is also going to cost me a shit ton up front (and always, monthly, forever, lmao).

you might be thinking, hey, don’t tattoo artists make a shit ton of money? shouldn’t it be chill?

in short: no. at least, not me, haha. some artists definitely make a shit ton, and those artists are certainly living cushier lives than most of us. (i’m mainly taking about artists who are well established, well known, ‘insta-famous’ or otherwise famous, etc. -- artists who charge literally thousands of dollars as their minimum for any tattoo, artists who require a $500 deposit just to hold an appointment slot, etc.)

however, one of my biggest efforts that i make as a tattooer is to try to remain accessible to my audience, which is largely made of of young queer people who are crippling under the weight of this expensive city/life/world just like me, haha. i try to keep my prices as fair as possible while also paying myself a living wage AFTER the 50% cut (per tattoo) that my boss takes (this is pretty standard for the tat industry). i barely charge anything for all of the time that i spend researching and sketching for a design before the appointment/tattoo session itself even happens. morally, i don’t want to charge people any more than i personally feel is fair, and learning to value my own art and time has been a bit of a learning curve for me, to say the least, haha. (you know it’s bad once your clients start telling you you’re undercharging. like, who says they want to pay you more money unless they actually mean it?! haha.) but like, morally, i can’t sit here charging people out the ass for tattoos. i want to keep my personal minimum & other pricing as reasonable as i can.

in addition to the everyday costs of being a tattoo artist, i also have lots of life expenses like everyone else, and lately, some of those life expenses have expanded into health-related issues. issues that largely are spanning from my job (bad tendinitis in my wrist, bad back and shoulder pain from constantly hunching and getting into crazy positions to get the right angle for a line, headaches caused by eye strain from starting at small needles vibrating into people’s skin for 8+ hours a day, just to name a few) -- as well as issues that i’ve been trying to ignore because of the recovery time getting in the way of making money at my job (long-overdue wisdom tooth extraction to take out these impacted bbs, chiropractor evaluations/sessions to see how we can fix my effed up spine/neck from a bad car wreck last year, among other things). 

as an independent american artist, i don’t get any free/included benefits; i pay for my heathcare and dental care out of pocket every month, and it costs me several hundred dollars. it would be cool if that wasn’t the case - benefits would be awesome - but i will literally never have a job with heathcare or a 401k, and that’s just a fact of life. it helps a little bit to have insurance, but even still, full costs are never covered, especially the more specific and/or frequent of treatments/doctors’ visits that you require.

SO. all rambles aside, i’m really here to say that i’ve finally started up a ko-fi page. i want to start a patreon so you guys can like, actually GET something for your money, but i know that realistically i don’t have the time to make content for patreon right now, and even if i did, my wrist can’t really keep up with doing any art outside of my work at the moment. (see: bad tendinits. also: part of the reason i’m imploding a little all the time, lmao.)

money stresses have been really weighing on me lately, and i know that $3 here or there doesn’t seem that significant, but honestly, anything helps. i want to be able to keep sharing and creating art for you guys, and would absolutely LOVE to get back into fandom again - if i weren’t so worried about making enough money to survive in LA 24/7, maybe i’d actually be able to scrounge up a little time for that again.

please share with your pals, if you feel obligated, and thank you all so much -- i seriously think you are all amazing, and i appreciate your support in any and every form, whether it’s just reading this post and sharing it or actually throwing $3 at my ko-fi or following my tattoo instagram. you guys are the bee’s knees and i love y’all. for real for real.

[schizosupport]

I've been needing to make a dentist appointment for some time now, but I'm very nervous about it because my dental health is shit. I've only been once in my life (my mom was neglectful about my health), and I brush my teeth once a week on average (executive dysfunction). I'm worried about the dentist's feedback rather than the actual visit. Any words of advice and/or encouragement? Also, as a side note, I wanna say thank you for all the help you've given me since I started following

Thank you for the kind words!! 

Dentists.. Well, I’ll tell you a story, I guess. In my country dental care is free and more or less mandatory until you turn 18. I had horrible teeth. My parents forced me to brush them everyday, yet everytime I went to the dentist they told me I wasn’t brushing properly, I wasn’t brushing enough, and inevitably I would go on the table - again - and being a sensitive paranoid kid, this was a horrible experience everytime. To make matters worse I later had to wear braces bc my face is weird and... yeah.

So when I turned 18 and left the “dental system” I fled... Out of sight, out of mind. For 5 years I never saw a dentist, and my dental hygiene was less than ideal.

Eventually the inevitable happened - my teeth broke in a way that was so visible and painful that I had no choice to see a dentist.

I was terrified. What would they say? “It’s your own fault”, “Why would you do this to yourself?” “Have you no dental shame?”.......

But my fears were ungrounded. The dentist was professional, to the point, even kind as I flailed about with anxiety. He casually let me know that I might want to get my wisdom teeth checked out when I came home I was away on holiday), but he never implied that any of it was my own fault for not brushing, or not seeing a doctor, even though the extent of the damage must have made it obvious.

Eventually I came back home, a dead tooth and an experience richer. While sat down in that chair, counting to ten over and over in an attempt not to panic, I had learned an important lesson: I am an adult. What I do with my own body is my business. Dentists are professionals performing a service for money (either from you, your insurance or the state). 

Sure, doctors of all kinds always hope that their patients would take better care of themselves. But any good doctor knows that there are a variety of reasons why that might not be possible for someone. 

If I were you I would be honest with my dentist. Let them know that this is only your second visit ever, because your parents never made it a priority, and let them know that brushing is hard for you. You don’t have to disclose your diagnoses, but you can tell them you have a condition that makes it harder for you to brush regularly, but that you’re doing your best. Maybe ask them for advice on things to do that could improve your dental health that aren’t too difficult. Would mouthwash help? Etc.

I think it’s really commendable that you are taking initiative to see a dentist, especially when you’re not used to going, and you’re scared of it. Dental health is super important, and I’m proud of you for taking steps to make sure that you’re as healthy as you can be.

Also remember: Teeth are very different. I have a friend who brushes her teeth every 4 months, and who’s never really been to the dentist, and she has no apparent complications.

Meanwhile I force myself to brush at least a couple times a week, yet I get cavities at an alarming rate..

Last but not least: A pro-tip, since you’re not used to going to the dentist: Make sure to brush your teeth before you go, and don’t eat after. I often show up early and brush my teeth in the bathroom at the dentist.. 

This will save you and the dentist a lot of unpleasantness and embarassment, and also makes it less likely for them to comment on your brushing regimen.I dunno if these rambling were helpful, but yeah... Just.. I believe in you!! You got this!! And it’s going to be okay!!

Cat

[anotherdayforchaosfay]

I fell in the shower today.

I’m okay.  Got a solid grip on the grab bar and it softened the landing.  Husband is getting a shower/bathing chair for me because this isn’t the first, nor shall it be the last, time it’s happened.  As for the why...

I’ve mentioned before I have an old back injury that has flared the fuck up recently.  Been going on for months. 

I acquired this injury from sledding when I was 14.  My mother forbade me from going sledding with friends.  I was 14, the hill was fantastic and so many kids were sledding.  Why the fuck would I wanna miss out on something like that?  I was on a disc sled, hit a rock, flew a good distance, and landed on another rock less than two inches from my spine.  Wind was knocked outta me, and it took almost ten minutes for me get my legs moving.  Cell phones weren’t common then; they were huge and often had to be carried in bags.  No one thought to call for an ambulance.  One of the friends I was sledding with suggested I sleep over because I didn’t want to get in trouble.  Not even 12 hours later her dad drove me home (because I could barely walk due to pain) and told my mom to take me to the hospital.  She said no, that I deserved this, it’ll be a reminder of what disobedience costs.  That’s when I learned no matter how much I get hurt, she won’t care. 

A large portion of my back was black and purple.  Massive bruise and all kinds of ugly.  Moving hurt, breathing hurt, I couldn’t lay down or sit up.  My mom insisted I do chores because I went sledding when she said not to go, that this is a lesson I need to remember.

I fucking remember.  Every fucking day for 22 years.  Blowing on that spot causes spasms and pain so severe I can’t even breathe.  There are clothes I can’t wear because they touch that spot in such a way that I’m damn near unable to move.  When I was 16 I threw my back out carrying all my school books because two minutes isn’t enough time to get to my locker and then to class.  The specialist I saw did an exam that hurt like fuck, had me crying and my mother calling me a wimp.  He told her this is a nerve cluster that’s like a scar but rather than being visible it causes me pain.  He told her I need surgery, that getting it done while I’m younger is safer and better for me because recovering is easier when young.  She said no because I’m just being wimpy.  I was given muscle relaxants, a board to lay on, a note saying I can’t go to school for at least a week, and another note telling my teachers I need more time between classes and need to use a wheelie bag (those were forbidden back then and really expensive). 

The pain has gotten worse every year.  My mother still thinks I deserve it, that I’m just wimpy.  My father had no say because he was in another country at the time the injury happened.  Military thing called TDY.

I’m seeing my doctor on the 27th; it’s the earliest appointment I could get.  I’ll be requesting a referral to a physical therapy clinic that also has a massage therapist (the only way my insurance will cover this at all), a muscle relaxant, and a referral to a specialist to get this taken care of. 

When the pain spikes, so does my vertigo.  I have constant vertigo, frequent dizzy spells, and recently both have gotten worse.  Hence falling in the shower.  We have all furniture corners cover with baby-safe cushioning because I bump into things a lot.  While looking at apartments (we’re moving in July) I’m looking for places without stairs.  A few years ago I fell down the two steps we had in our home and gave myself a concussion.  No idea how long I was out, but stairs are not good for me.  Especially now. 

Sitting at my computer for more than half an hour hurts like hell.  My recliner is the only place I get any relief, however minor it is.  Quilting is slower because various movements make the pain shoot up.  Normally the pain is sitting at a constant 6; I’m used to it, no big deal.  It’s now sitting at an 8 and spikes to a 9.5.  I pass out at a 10, and have experienced that 10 when my IUD broke in 2010.  That’s another story for another day.

The only thing my mother taught me is that no matter how much pain I’m in, no matter the severity of my injuries, telling her won’t mean a damn thing.  My pain tolerance is insanely high, but she calls me a wimp anyway.  I fell asleep when I got my tattoos, one of which covers the majority of my left ankle and goes up to my knee.  The endorphins release had me really sleepy and I napped for the three hours of the tattoo work.  I fall asleep during most dental appointments because the pain and discomfort release endorphins and make me sleepy.  I have injured myself during seizures, been hit by three cars, suffered a concussion, tore a ligament in my wrist after a bad fall down a set of stairs (and suffered it for 5 years before proper diagnosis and surgery), and a whole hell of a lot of other injuries.  Not to mention the self-harm I inflicted on my legs (no one questions small cuts when I shaved my legs) for over a decade. 

I’m dealing with severe vertigo, extreme pain that has actually made me cry, and I’m pissed the fuck off.  It’s taken me THIS FUCKING LONG to realize my parents weren’t only neglectful of me but also abusive.  It was little and big things, and only with the help of my current counselor have I been able to face what has happened to me.  My sisters were pampered and given all the positive love and affection.  I’m the eldest and “should be setting an example”.  Constantly asked “why can’t you be more like your sisters” and punished when I got anything lower than a B.  Though the neglect they threw at me when I got a B certainly fucking qualifies. 

I don’t know how I can ever bring this up with my parents.  They will never believe they did anything wrong.  I will never get an apology.  Nothing will change other than a massive rift in the family for which I’ll be blamed.

For those who are unaware of a small detail, I rarely cry.  I was shamed for crying, for being emotional, wimpy, too sensitive, etc.  I learned how to cry silently.  Having severe allergies made my sniffling nose easy to mask.  When something makes me cry, it’s an event.  I’m getting better at crying, but when it’s pain that’s setting it off, it’s bad.  My husband is mad with worry because he’s seeing me cry from pain that I’ve been masking for years.  He hates that I hold all this in. He cries openly, he’s sensitive, sympathetic, empathetic, and has none of the toxic masculinity (he claims it’s due to being raised in a house of women).  I’ve been enjoying edibles for several weeks now to help deal with the pain, but I can’t have them daily for many reasons.  I’m allergic to nearly every pain medication, and the one I’m not allergic to (aleve) has no effect on this.  It helps with migraines, fevers, and my wrist, but not my back. 

I know my doctor will help me.  She’s an amazing doctor, she listens to me, hears me, asks the right questions and never shames me for the ones I ask.  She’ll likely insist on me seeing a specialist because this isn’t something I ought to be forced to live with for the rest of my life.  She’ll also mark the massage therapy as medically necessary, which is the only way Medicare will cover it (I’m disabled and on SSDI).

Please don’t reblog this, but you can reply.  I’m full of pain and anger and hurt right now.  JFC I’m gonna cry again.  The more sugar coating I remove from my past, the more I really look at my childhood and growing up, the more I realize how horrible things were for me.  Like many victims of childhood abuse and neglect, I’ve pushed a vast amount of it away.  Don’t want to look at it, don’t want to think about it, but 2019 was the year I began to heal.  Now the ugly part is finally coming around.  The worst part of moving in July will be losing my counselor and doctor. 

[rawcbwzx-blog]

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