#but I honestly didn't think that it was that bad

[taure-annie]

The Blue Glow

→ premise: What starts as late nights spent helping Paige through heartbreak slowly shifts - until you’re left wondering if friendship was ever the right word.

→ word count: 4k

It’s just past two when you hear the key rattle in the front door, followed by the soft creak as it swings open. Paige, your roommate, usually comes home late on Fridays, a little buzzed or maybe high after a night with her teammates or her girlfriend. You’re used to hearing her stumble in, her laughter still lingering from whatever fun she’d been having, always fading into the quiet of the apartment.

You call her name, waiting for her confirmation. She’s the only one with a key, but saying her name and hearing her respond feels safe, like a habit you’ve formed without thinking. Silence. You lean back in your chair, letting your game screen idle as you peer through the small crack in your door.

You wait a moment, letting the silence of the apartment settle around you before it's broken by the unmistakable shuffle of her kicking off her shoes, the soft thud of her door and then steady beat of music seeping from her room.

You turning back to your desktop and unpausing your game. Your fingers move across the key‐ board, killing pixelated monsters and yet still, your mind crawls back to 20 minutes ago, when Paige walked in.

Were you supposed to knock on her door and ask if she was okay? Basic roommate etiquette would assume so, but it's not as though you and Paige were buddy-buddy. Sure, you'd chilled together a few times to catch up on Netflix's latest murder doc and yeah, she'd invited you to one or two of her teammate's afterparties (none of which you'd gone to, instead you offered polite decline that assured she really didn't need to ask you again).

At most, you and Paige were just in each other's orbit. Nothing more than two girls attending the same university who got placed together in an apartment just off-campus.

The clock ticks to 3:15, and finally, the music fades into silence. She’s probably asleep now. You tell yourself to focus on your game, but your gaze drifts to the wall, your thoughts lingering on her room just a few feet away. Honestly, you’re not sure why you’re still awake.

***

You’re unpacking your groceries when you notice her—Paige, sprawled out across the couch like she’s trying to disappear into it. Her hoodie is pulled low over her face, but you can still make out the outline of her eyes, locked on you the moment you glance in her direction.

"You good?" You ask, feeling the need to soften your voice - something in your body tells you to tread carefully.

She yawns, stretches, and when she speaks, her voice is thick with sleep—rougher than usual, like she hasn’t quite woken up. “Yeah, just a bit fucked up.”

There's something in her tone that gives you pause like she's daring you to dig deeper. You hesitate. It sounds bad to say, but you've always liked the unspoken agreement between you two - the comfortable distance, once again, like planets moving in the same orbit but never touching.

You take the bait. "What's up?"

She pushes herself up, so she's now resting on her elbows,  “Ari fucking broke up with me."

The two had seemed to be one of the few couples who could go the distance. In the few games you attended, you'd seen her girlfriend always present, aptly draped in a number 5 jersey titled 'Bueckers'. As far as college relationships went, it seemed like love.

"Oh." It's all you manage to say at first, unsure of how to respond. Were you supposed to hug her? 

Paige drops back onto the couch, covering her face with her hands. "Yeah, oh."

"And it's final?" You ask, "Cause, it's never really over, over. It's probably -"

"She blocked me," she cuts in, still deep within the recesses of her hoodie. "She probably blocked me the moment I left her place ... I've messaged her and called her but it goes straight to green or voice mail."

You nod, once again unsure of what to say next. You'd don't have to think because Paige drops in again. She had a one-of-a-kind skill of unknowingly being able to fill in silences.

"It's not like I cheated or she cheated," you hear the emotions flooding back into her voice - it's not sadness, well it probably is but it's wrapped up in anger and disbelief. "Which spins me because it's not like we were in a bad spot - okay yeah, I wouldn't respond sometimes, but that's normal, sometimes I'm genuinely tired from training!"

"Maybe she's stressed too and it's all a bit too much to deal with," You say.

She throws you a quick look, something between betrayal and you're not helping. It's fast, and she cools her features back to normal.

"- Not that I'm saying it's a good excuse," you counter, "But, it's something to consider. Did she actually say why?"

"Something about I'm not present. It's bullshit," she sighs.

You want to say something comforting, anything, but everything that comes to mind feels hollow. Besides, it's not like whatever you could say could put a bandage over a 2 year relationship ending.

She sits up again, her hoodie falling back to it's rightful face. She looks around the room, her eyes itching for something to distract her from whatever uncomfortable feelings she can feel rising. Her eyes fall on her set of keys, the original red fob you'd both received on move-in day had long been overtaken by numerous keychains and fabric bracelets - even a heart picture frame.

"Hey, do you want to do something?" She asks, "Get out of here for a bit?"

At the tip of your tongue is some vague excuse about how you really need to cook right now, but before it can come out, she speaks again.

"Please - I really need to step out for a bit." Her voice is soft, just about holding back a crack.

You're not a monster so of course, you nod and say sure. You don't ask where to until you're following her long strides down the hall and into the low-lit car park. The night feels colder than usual and your bare feet in slides feel anything but appropriate for the weather.

An orange glow from a stray streetlight casts a small tinge of light on her face as she unlocks the door to her car. "I was thinking of going to the outdoor court. You know, the one near the park? It's just a short drive. I could really use a change of scenery, and maybe shooting around would help clear my head .... that cool?"

"Yeah," you say, because what else could you say? "That’s cool."

How cliche you think - a basketball player needing to shoot hops to clear their head. 

The drive is quiet, the hum of the engine filling the space between you. Paige keeps her eyes on the road, and the tension in her shoulders is palpable. You can't help but think this is how she looks when she's on the bench, (playing the game in her mind, sizing up the opposition and just yearning to get back in).

Connecticut's lights blur past as you make your way out of the downtown area, the campus fading away as she turns into a quieter, more residential neighbourhood. The basketball court comes into view, illuminated by a few scattered streetlights and a single overhead light, casting a gentle glow over the cracked asphalt and faded court markings.

She pulls into the nearest parking bay, reversing in with ease, her arm draping over your headrest as she checks the mirror. It's then that you wonder how many times she's done this exact move with her ex. You imagine her ex sitting where you are now, lips fresh with a kiss and the seat shaped by her form.

A whole two years, you think. No wonder she was going stair-crazy.

You're now out of the car, rocking on the back of your feet as Paige gets her duffle bag out of the car. It's at that point when she finally asks you about your day.

You shrug, "It's been ight, nothing much to be fair. Just trying to get my head around ... we've got a new TA and the bitch marks hard as hell."

She chuckles in response, "Damn, tough one. You do something with economics, right?"

"Yeah, something about economics. Not my first choice but it's gonna do the job," you reply trailing behind her longer strides as she leads you both into the empty court.

"Economics. Get the job done?" she repeats with a playful scoff, a small smirk playing on her lips. "Can't tell if you're being humble or—"

"Not humble," you interject, "It's an ends to means."

She unzips her duffle bag and brings out her ball and bounces it a few times, the rhythmic thud echoing softly in the quiet night. "What's the end goal then?"

You're shrugging as you go to take your place on the edge of the court, watching as Paige moves around and seemingly becomes one with the court. (something about seeing her in her natural ele‐ ment) "Probably some cushy consulting job. I'm not gonna lie, I've got no idea but I've lowkey liked the subject all through school, it's just made sense to do it."

Paige dribbles the ball a few times, then takes a shot. The ball cuts through the air and swishes through the hoop. light work.

"I'm guessing you've always known what you wanted to do," you continue.

She nods, bounces the ball again, but this her feet and body moving across the court as though she's playing the last two minutes of a game. "Yup! It's always been basketball. From elementary, middle school and high school. Nothing but ball." she punctuates her last line with a throw.

 "Wish that were me!" you say.

She looks over at you, the ball now finding itself passing from hand to hand. "You wanted to play ball?"

It's your turn to scoff, "No, I'm talking about the whole knowing what you wanted to do from the get go."

Paige pauses mid-dribble, her eyes narrowing playfully as she studies you. "Yeah, I get that. Not everyone figures it out early. But, you know, it's not like it's been easy. Just because I knew doesn't mean it wasn't a grind."

She takes another shot, and the ball glides through the net with a satisfying swish. As she retrieves it, she adds, "There's a lot of pressure, too. Once you say 'this is it,' everyone expects you to stick with it, no matter what."

You watch as she moves across the court, her pace slower now, more thoughtful. "I guess I just got lucky," she continues. "Or maybe I was stubborn. It's hard to tell sometimes."

"I guess that makes you one of the few," you say, leaning back against the fence, watching her with a mix of admiration and something else - something you can't quite put your finger on. Is this what her fans felt? It always spun you that she had fans. Fans. Would they be jealous right now? "Most people I know are still figuring it out, including me."

Paige stops dribbling and looks at you, her expression softening. "You've got time," she says, her voice losing some of its earlier intensity. "There's no rush to have it all figured out. Sometimes, the best things come when you least expect them."

She tosses the ball to you, and it lands in your hands with a gentle thud. You can feel the worn leather under your fingers, still warm from her grip. For a moment, you're both silent, the weight of her words hanging in the cool night air.

"Maybe," you say quietly, the ball feeling heavier and heavier in your hands. "But sometimes it feels like everyone else is racing ahead while I'm stuck at the start line."

"Play with me," she says, gesturing you over.

You look down at the ball and then back to her, "You're a D1 athlete. You're just gonna show me up plus I don't even know how to shoot."

"Come on, I'll teach you," There's a playful glint in her eyes. "It'll make me like five percent less sad."

You hesitate, but her enthusiasm is contagious. She hands the ball back to you and steps behind, lightly adjusting your stance. "Feet shoulder-width apart, knees bent," she instructs, her hands guiding yours on the ball. "Use your legs for power, wrist for control."

You try to follow her lead, feeling her breath close as she directs your movements. "And when you shoot, remember, follow through, like you're reaching into a cookie jar."

You chuckle at the analogy and take a shot. The ball bounces off the rim, and Paige claps. "Not bad. Let's go again."

Paige steps in front of you, her tone shifting slightly as she moves into coach mode. You can tell she's probably coached some little league somewhere here in Connecticut or wherever her home state was - she’d mentioned it numerous times but you’d forgotten. "Alright, keep your elbow in and focus on the backboard," she says, her hands demonstrating the movement. "And don't forget, it's all about the follow through."

You roll your eyes playfully. "Alright, coach. I got it."

"It's Coach P," She smirks, her eyes twinkling. "Just trying to make you a baller." You take another shot, and this time, the ball swishes through the net. Paige cheers, giving you a high five. "There it is! You're a natural."

"Light work" you say with a grin. It's anything but.

Paige bumps you lightly with her shoulder. "Not bad at all. But next time, we're working on your dribbling cause that shit was shocking."

***

Nights at the court, which you’d now come to know was actually called St Bernard’s Court, became routine much like when you’d call her name when she’d come back to the apartment.

You’d gotten used to settling into the passenger seat of her car, the familiar hum of the engine surrounding you as she drove, her hands gripping the wheel with that same steady determination. Conversations, once filled with awkward pauses and small talk, now flowed effortlessly. They were the kind of talks that never seemed to end - about everything and nothing, the mundane details of life at uni, complaints about bad food at the cafeteria, or her latest training session. It was simple.

Sometimes, she’d give up her dictator-like hold over the music and let your playlists take over, though more often than not, you let hers play on. You never minded; there was something comforting about the predictable beats of her curated selections. Her taste was always a little sharper, more nuanced than yours, and you found yourself adding some of songs to your liked list when you’d gotten back to the safety of your own room.

Sometimes, after an hour of shooting around, you’d both end up on the concrete, sitting against the low bleachers, legs stretched out before you, talking about whatever came to mind and letting the cold settle deep into your skin. But more often than not, the conversation would shift to her ex. It had become a quiet pattern: Paige would talk about her like it was a distant, painful memory she was still learning how to deal with.

She’d mention her in passing, her tone casual at first, as though it didn’t sting anymore.

It reminded you like she was just like any other girl despite the fame. Unable to resist feigning indifference to hurt - so you didn’t judge because you’d done it over and over.

“I don’t even know why she said that,” Paige would say, tossing the ball back into her hands, eyes focused on something far off. “I never meant to be distant. You know how it is; practice, school, games... life’s a lot.” She’d sigh, running a hand through her hair, shaking her head.

And then, almost like she couldn’t help herself, the bitterness would slip in. “She made it sound like I didn’t care at all,” Paige muttered, kicking the ball across the court. “Like it was all about me, me, me.” Her voice softened, the edges raw, the anger melting into something unspoken and lingering. “She didn’t even give me a chance to explain, to fix things. Not that it matters now.”

You listened. Not to solve anything, not to offer some platitude about how she’d be better off. You listened because, in those quiet moments, it felt like her words were a way of processing, a way to let the weight of everything settle into something less heavy.

Her ex wasn’t just a past relationship, not just a name you’d heard murmured in the back of conversations. She was a part of Paige’s present, even if it was an unwelcome one, lingering in the way Paige looked at the court sometimes, or the way she pulled away when you tried to get too close. Her ex was a shadow that loomed over your conversations, her absence filling the spaces that Paige didn’t want to admit she missed.

“You know, I thought she was the one,” Paige would often say with a dry laugh, picking at the fabric of her hoodie. “Stupid, huh?” She’d shake her head like it was all so ridiculous now. But the way she’d say it, softly, almost tenderly, like she was still trying to convince herself.

And then, just as quickly, she’d pull herself out of it, focusing on something else. “Anyway, I’m not thinking about her tonight,” she’d say, standing up and grabbing the ball.

At some point she’d move on. Stop needing the nights at the court and you’d be proud because your friend (it felt weird to call her a friend thinking about the times you’d dodged her invitations for connection, but things were different now) had moved on.

***

The nights eventually come to an end.

They’re stopped when you’re sitting in yours and Paige’s shared living room, letting the tv play in the background as you listlessly scroll on your phone.

The door to her room is closed but you can hear the familiar music playing through it. She emerges, her face flushed and eyes bright - frantic even.

“Yo ... Guess who just called me?” She announces, taking what felt like her first breath in hours.

You look up, the question hanging in the air between you. Your thumb hovers over your phone’s screen, trying to gauge her excitement.

Paige’s gaze is intense, a slight nervous energy vibrating beneath her words. She doesn’t wait for you to guess.

“Ari,” she says, her voice a little softer now, like she’s unsure what to feel about it. “She called me.” The words hit you unexpectedly, like a slow tide pulling at your feet. A small knot forms in your stomach, not because you’re unhappy for her, but because you weren’t prepared for this.

“Oh shit,” you manage to say, trying to push away the strange, unexpected sensation that’s fluttered inside you.

“She said sorry. She said she made a mistake. Fuck, I... I don’t know even know what think.”

You lean forward a little, trying to sound reassuring. “I mean, that’s a good sign, right? She’s reaching out.”

Paige exhales a short laugh, glancing down at her hands before looking back up at you. “I guess? But fuck, it just feels... messy.”

You nod, understanding the weight of her uncertainty. You’ve seen how much this relationship meant to her, and it’s clear she’s torn.

“You wanna talk about it?” you ask.

She shakes her head, a small smile creeping onto her face. “Not yet, I think. I just... I need to think. It’s all a bit much, you know?”

The room goes silent, save for the faint hum of the TV in the background.

For a moment, you sit in the quiet, the weight of the conversation hanging in the air. And maybe it’s just you, or maybe it’s just the way Paige is looking at you now, but you sense that something has shifted—ever so slightly, but undeniably.

You’re still not sure what that means yet, or if it means anything at all. But for now, you don’t push.

She sighs and falls back onto the couch, closing her eyes. “I’ll figure it out,” she says softly, more to herself than to you but you know she’s already made her choice. 

You lean back, turning your attention back to your phone, but there’s an odd feeling in your chest that refuses to settle. For a moment, you wonder what would have happened if things had gone differently, if she’d never gotten that call. But before you can think too much about it, Paige shifts beside you, her presence pulling you back down to earth.

“Thanks,” she says quietly.

You smile, almost relieved that the tension has eased, even if only for now. “Anytime.”

The night stretches on, the air between you both comfortable again. And yet, you can’t help but wonder why you feel torn. Why aren’t you bubbling with happiness, like how you’d reacted when Zen had called you in senior year to say she and Trevor had gotten back together.

Eventually, you leave the couch, muttering an excuse about needing to get back to studying.

 Ari comes back into the fold of life at yours and Paige’s apartment like she’d never left.

The songs that used to fill Paige’s room—those soft, sad, contemplative ones—shift back to some‐ thing lighter, more upbeat. Her shoes reappear, scattered carelessly by the door, mingling with Paige’s own, like they always belonged together. And just like that, you go back to being good roommates.

That doesn’t hurt. It’s respectful - because who’d let their girlfriend spend nights at the basketball court together? It makes sense.

It only hurts when you come back to the apartment and see them on the couch. The lights dimmed, a fluffy blanket over their legs and a Christmas movie playing.

The first time it happens, you’re awkward. Painfully awkward. Your body not knowing how to react for the first time to something you’d seen countless times before.

You hesitate in the doorway, suddenly unsure of how to move, unsure of what to say. The air between the three of you feels thicker, heavier than it ever has before. You wish you could say something light, make a joke.

They don’t even notice at first - Paige’s attention is wholly focused on the TV screen, her hand absentmindedly brushing through her girlfriend’s hair. You feel like you’re not even supposed to be here, even though it’s your apartment too.

Eventually, though, Paige looks up, her eyes meeting yours, and for a second, the warmth in them falters. She smiles, but it’s tight, apologetic.

“Hey,” she says, her voice a little too bright, a little too forced. “You’re back. We were just watching this cheesy Christmas movie. Wanna join?”

The offer is there, hanging in the air between you, but the tension is palpable. You force a smile, shaking your head quickly.

“Nah, it’s fine,” your voice comes out more strained than you’d intended. “I was just coming in to ... grab something.”

You spend the rest of the night at Zen’s.

“So bitch, what the hell is up with you?” Zen asks. her gaze sharp as she watches you.

You blink, focusing back on her, the buzz of the rosé clouding your thoughts. “Nothing, I’m fine,” you reply, maybe a little too quickly.

“Sure ... sure you are,” she says with a knowing look, before taking a long sip from her glass, then a pause. “Dude, you’ve literally been distracted all night. Moping around everywhere.”

You hesitate, a little caught off guard. You’ve told Zen about Paige, from the odd first meeting to playing basketball together and to the events which took place hours ago.

“You sure you’re okay with them... back together?” Zen continues, her voice quieter, but there’s a softness to it now. She’s not trying to push, just letting the question sit there.

The idea that maybe everyone sees what you’re trying to hide - maybe even Paige  - that part makes you feel sick.

You take another sip of your wine, the sweet sharpness of it doing nothing to dull the growing ache in your chest.

“Yeah,” you say again, but it’s not convincing. Not to Zen. Not to yourself.

Zen’s eyes soften, and for a moment, she doesn’t look at you like she’s waiting for a response. She looks at you like she already knows the answer. You know it. Damn.

***

A/N: My first Paige fic! let me know what you think and if I should continue ... I haven't written fanfiction in years, which is a shame because I used really enjoy the fic writing/reading community. I've literally had this blog on the backburner for the last 3 or so years just waiting to find the right thing to write about and here it is ... I think?

[epickiya722]

It's still something to me that Sukuna knew Yuji was his nephew for like a month and didn't tell Yuji that.

Why he didn't, I don't know. But I guess it's because he didn't care to, at the end of the day. There would have been no point to it.

Even still, Sukuna wanted to so badly break Yuji's spirit and he didn't figure that may have done it, revealing they're technically family? Because had Yuji known, I'm sure it would have upset him.

Then again, maybe Sukuna figured "the brat wouldn't believe me anyways". In 248, he mentions no matter what he did, Yuji isn't breaking.

A part of me also feels like Sukuna just didn't want to be reminded that he still had family. The more you don't think and mention something and ignore it, the more nonexistent it becomes.

Maybe he acted dismissive while revealing that information to Uraume, who was more surprised and curious, to kind of cut off that connection. Extinguish that feeling of what it's like to have family that could care for you.

He was there to witness how Yuji's relationship with Choso changed and maybe it reminded him of what could have been had he and his twin survived in the womb. (I still think Sukuna just had it out for Choso and maybe part of the reason could be because Choso was so devoted to be being a big brother while Sukuna didn't get to experience having a sibling.)

We see how he acts just from Yuji showing any bit of sympathy and pity for him.

Maybe he is disgusted by the idea of human connections and emotions genuinely. That his own "me, myself and I" mentality is so strong that he convinced himself that even having family is absurd to him? And what if a part of him, deep, deep down just feels he doesn't deserve that love?

I'm just rambling and pondering right now.

[allllium]

Just an Accident

~ Jason todd x reader who was accidentally hurt

~ Fluff, Jason being dramatic, WC:

~ Inspired by @mostly-imagines

(okay I genuinely have no idea how this got posted bc it was just saved in my drafts but this isn't finished yet 😭😭 I'm working on it and it will hopefully be done soon)

Jason tried really hard to keep his secret secret from you but let's be honest, he's very obvious about it. Especially once you meet his family.

After he finally came clean to you about everything, he became even more protective. More protective than you ever thought possible.

He would freak out anytime he didn't know where you were or if you got hurt in any way.

"I'm so so sorry." Bruce says, following you through the mansion repeating his apology.

"It's okay, Bruce, it was an accident." You reply, "I should've known."

Honestly there was no way you could've known that Bruce was creating some elaborate booby trap on the kitchen counter that would fail and smack you in the face when you walked into the kitchen.

It didn't hurt too bad, luckily Bruce was testing things with plastic and not the real materials.

From the look of it though, you'll definitely have a mark on your nose and possibly a bruise under your eye.

"I had no idea it was gonna do that." He continues defending, knowing how Jason will react.

"It's fine, I swear. I know you wouldn't do that on purpose." You walk into the living room and sit down on the couch. Bruce sits next to you.

"Can I get you anything?" He asks. Obviously freaking out.

"No, it's alright. It really doesn't hurt."

"Oh shit." You hear Dick gasp. Coming in through the front door with Tim.

"Oh, what did you do!?" Tim asks, "Jason is gonna kill you."

"It was an accident, everything is fine." You try to calm everyone down.

Seeing that you're okay, Dick can't hold back his laugh.

"Wow, Jason is never gonna trust you again Bruce." Tim hits Dick on the arm and rolls his eyes. To the side of you, Bruce leans forward to hold his head in his hands.

"I think you guys are being a little dramatic. Jason isn't gonna kill him."

"No you seriously underestimate how Jason will react to this." Tim tells you.

"Yeah, remember he almost killed me for making jokes about you when you first got together."

"What?" You turn to Dick in confusion, "I don't remember that."

"Not important," he waves it off, "The point is, we need a plan."

"A plan for what?"

[fuck-you-too-world]

I have a thought,

Tim is the embodiment of Gen Z and the reason why DC disrespect him a lot is because they saw the potential and how chaotic he could be because he's just so... How do say this, he had the most normal past (as normal as any Gotham kids could get and being a nepo baby) compare to others who had tragic back story.

Tim tragic back story didn't start until he take the Robin mantel, so I think DC is scared of Tim's potential especially with his mentality that is so flexible. Like, this boy is labeled as the coffee addict-sleep deprived-tech guy-that has too much money-too much work-and could drop dead anytime, just like gen Z (except the money part).

Then the chart just made me think of it even more! Tim is literally us as gen Z but he has money, training and no adult supervision! The intelligence is debatable cuz I think he usually has the brain cells but most of the time lost it, he can be as harmless as he is apocalyptic danger level all just because he felt like it. He's mostly harmless cuz he lacks motivation.

Like imagine! (He has so many war crimes I wanted to add more so he can have a special folder with more folders inside dedicated for one war crime saperated based on timeline, planet and dimension)

Tim : Feeling bored, might piss off Luther later cuz his life is too peaceful rn

*proceeds to take over the economic world and become a shadow emperor and open up charities just because*

Also Tim

Tim : Feeling a bit feral and kinda want to have a historical vibe today

*save planets and became emperor of several planets and he rules it really well to the point he has religion that worship him*

Then he's also

Tim : This family (Waynes) is so fucked up, they need help fr fr

*blackmail Batman after he failed to blackmail Nightwing, become a therapist cuz he can't fix his family so fix others*

Near death experience? You wish!

Tim : oh, look it's Jason in- is that a cheap Robin costume?! Ew!!

*got beaten cuz he's too busy thinking about something else instead of focusing in the fight, plus he saw the kid he sort of replaced still alive -a bit murdery- but alive which is good news for his 'fixing Wayne family project'!*

Tim in his depressed and apathic era

Tim : Hm... He said no killing but is it killing if I gave them warning but they choose to ignore me and got caught up in the explosion? No, no it's not. *shrug* Good enough.

*proceeds to bomb Ra's bases and make the creepy immortal rat man loses hair and gain gray hairs at the same time*

Near death experience number unknown? Nah~

Tim : oh wow, I manage to finished all of the assignments and mission right on time! Damn, this is a record! Oh, look at that, the sky looked so clear! Too bad we can't see starts in Gotham, welp, not a bad day to sleep! I can finally sleep!

*sigh out in disappointment when He got caught and land safely on the ground, mourning the sleep he'll never get*

His response is always so relatable and mood to the point I need gen Z artist or something to get inside DC and just let out your chaotic-idgaf-feral-racoon-self so Tim can just be his true self and grow into his potential! I need to see him in his more chaotic nature with flexible moral because dang, he's just so US sometimes.

Or is it just me? Honestly, I saw this post on Pinterest and immediately went to search the original post on timblr -pun intended- just so I can let this out of my head.

Alright, thank your for coming to my Ted talk. Scatter!

i find the dischotomy between the batfam's potential to kill vs their real-world willingness to kill very interesting! so I made a graph because I'm a nerd

[optimisticmosquito]

What if Shen Yuan was transmigrated into Shang Yuan, youngest son in the merchant Shang family and Shang Qinghua's little brother.

At first Shang Qinghua doesn't put much thought into it. He never did write much of a backstory for the other peak lords, so it makes sense the world has kind of just, written itself? Shang Yuan is several years younger anyways (I'm thinking 7-10 years) so it's not like he has a lot in common with him either. Shang Qinghua even joined CQM when he was barely out of toddlerhood. Shang Qinghua was fully prepared to just slowly fade out of sight and mind in his new family, just like he had in his old one.

Except this kid just really hates his guts? He gets letters regularly from his family, telling him how a-Yuan has been asking about him. But every time he visits the brat just shouts and kicks him around. All out of sight of their parents so he can't even go and complain to them! In their eyes Shang Yuan is their perfect little angel.

Honestly, Shang Qinghua isn't even that surprised the original goods turned into a villain if this was how he grew up. And oops, did he say that out loud? Shang Qinghua peeks down at the rigid brat he's holding under his arm in an attempt to stop him from trying to beat him up. With big eyes the kid turns his head up and whispers "you're a transmigrator too?".

From that day on Shang Qinghua can't help but feel a little bit less lonely, and maybe even a little happy. Who would have thought his number 1 anti fan would transmigrate into his didi! They start writing letters, both complaining about the system, and Shang Qinghua about the sect and his martial siblings. When he starts working for Mobei-jun he tells Shang Yuan everything about it. He even has a reason to go back and visit his family!

Shang Qinhua quickly accepts his responsibility as gege. Helping (or trying to) his little didi grow up to a nice young man and giving tips when Shang Yuan starts cultivating as well. And despite Yuan-di's tsundere behavior, Shang Qinghua knows he has his back as well.

In his own badly written stallion novel, Shang Qinghua finally finds the family he didn't have in the real world.

Now as for pairings. Bingyuan would be hilarious just because I want Shang Qinghua to ask, with a shit eating grin, how long Shang Yuan has been coveting his own nephew. And then for Shang Yuan to try and beat the shit out of him for it.

Jiuyuan would also be an interesting pairing (it can always be a jiuyuan if you're brave enough). Shang Qinghua knows his scum villain is misunderstood and not as bad as the book and rumors portrays him to be. But also he knows Shen Jiu is at least a dozen traumas in a trenchcoat. Does it really have to be his didi helping Shen Jiu deal with all of that? Sure Shang Yuan doesn't seem to mind, but Shang Qinghua also knows his didi makes some really stupid choices if you take your eyes off him. But also he's too much of a coward to say anything to Shen Jiu's face.

Hm, better to keep an eye on that from a distance.

[asexualspectrumspector]

Hey everyone,

I don't usually do original posts and I try to keep this a positivity blog, but I feel I need to reach out to all of my followers, especially my followers living in the US.

Yesterday's election and the time leading up to it were extremely stressful. The results of the election were not what many of us hoped they would be. I can honestly say I woke up this morning and immediately felt my heart plummet into my stomach once I turned on the news.

My mind raced with questions. How was this going to affect my students (I'm a public school teacher)? How would this affect my family? Friends? Me? Why did so many people see what this monster did during the last 8 years and think, yeah that's the guy I want running the country?

I was disappointed and angry. I wanted to rant and rave. I wanted to fight back against an unjust and biased system. But I didn't .

I got dressed, drank my coffee, and went to work. Because I had a duty to my students. I knew many of them would be scared of what would come next and would look to me to give them answers. And even if I didn't have answers, I could still be a consistent, calm, and reassuring person in their lives.

All this to say, I hope you are gentle with yourself in these upcoming days. I hope you can be a consistent, calm, and caring person in someone's life, or that you are able to find someone to be that for you. I hope we are able to fight back against an unjust and oppressive system together.

One way or another, we'll come out of this together. We will have bad days, probably many bad days, in the future. But we will survive this. We have lived through every single terrible day before this, and we will survive this too.

Remember, be gentle with yourself. But also prepare to fight. Because we will not let ourselves be run over by those who think they can overpower us. We will show them what happens when we stand together.

We can do this.

I love you.

🖤🩶🤍💜

[lou-struck]

At the Top

Keigo Takami/ Hawks x reader

W.C~ 2k

~ Your date at the Fair turns from a questionable experience to a full-blown disaster when you and your online date get stranded at the top of the Ferris Wheel.

With the fair in town, you thought that spending the afternoon eating ridiculously sounding fair food, playing games, and riding the rides sounded like a picture-perfect first-date idea. But that's the problem with being a romantic.

You tend to get your hopes up…

"So… Are you having a good time so far?" the man sitting across from you asks for the 9th time this evening. The two of you had matched on a dating app a few weeks ago, and after many late nights of texting that filled your stomach with butterflies and heart with hope, you finally took the step and asked if he would like to actually go out.

But the evening has been less than ideal. Your date, although good-looking, clearly has some serious baggage from his last relationship that even your 'I can fix him' mindset wants to turn away from. 

He has refused to go on ride after ride after ride with you, claiming that he and his friends rode all of them last year and thought they were just a waste of time. And he turned his nose up at any of the mouthwateringly atrocious fair food you wanted to try out and dragged you to the only place on the fairgrounds that sold smoothie bowls, which may be delicious, but they are something you could eat any other day whilst cheddar cheese flavored ice cream is not.

You try to hide your frown as you spin the deep purple, soupy concoction with your spoon as you stare across at your dark haired date and tell him what you think is a convincing lie, "Yes, I'm having a great time. Thank you for the acai bowl."

"Don't mention it," he chuckles, wiping his berry-dusted chin with his sleeve. "I'm glad I was able to find us something in this place that was organic. All that deep-fried garbage they sell at the other stalls is repulsing."

"Maybe," you say, stirring your bowl even more, really not wanting to engage in any kind of debate with this guy. You take a bite of your bowl, and while it is good, you hate that it costs the same as half a tank of gas. 

Luckily, your date paid for that. 

Just getting up and leaving is always an option, but there is still hope that things can turn around, or at least you'll have a decent bad date story to tell your friends when the night is over.

"How about we go on the Ferris wheel?" he says at last, boredly scraping the button of his paper bowl with his spoon. 

"Really?" you say, thankful that you are finally able to go on one freaking ride on this date. Maybe you were being too critical of your date…

"Why not?" he says, "I didn't go on that one yet."

oh…

~

When you like someone, the idea of being wedged together on the Ferris wheel is something straight out of a romance movie, But when the already little spark of attraction you are feeling for your date has been drowned and smothered by the murky waters of his overflowing ego, the act is tortuous. 

Despite the little legroom in your pod, your date has decided to take up most of it with his wide stance; his obvious manspreading gets more and more stifling as you rise slowly into the air. The multicolored light bulbs of the wheel flicker, and you wonder briefly if that is normal.

It's getting a bit cold up here, isn't it?" he asks with a sly smile. It's honestly not cold at all; in fact, the warm air is kinda stuffy. Before you can say anything, his arm slings over your shoulder, and you dig your nails into your palm; it doesn't feel right; you know how you feel when you are attracted to someone, and this is not it.

The flash of a camera phone catches your attention and you blink away the spots in your vision. 

"Oh, that's perfect," he chuckles, looking at the selfie he just took of the both of you. "I'll send it to you and we can set it for our lock screens."

"Don't you think it's a little soon for that?" you ask, now wondering what kinda psycho you are trapped on this ride with.

"Hey, when you know you know Baby Cakes," he says with an almost hallmark channel level of confidence as he looks at the photo with a delusional smile. "Oh, we look great. I gotta send this photo to my Mom; she is gonna love you."

"Oh… how nice," you say dryly. You feel sick… in that moment, you decide that when you touch down on solid ground, you are going to get the hell out of dodge and take a cab home and leave this guy in the dust.  

The ride reaches its peak, and you sigh; at least you only have a few minutes left of this tortuous experience.  

"Hey, have you ever kissed someone at the top of a Ferris wheel before?" he asks, leaning in close. 

"Not really my thing," you say, scooting as far away from him as you can. But in the little car, you can't really go far. 

"Oh come on, don't be so shy, y/n, I don't ~" he starts to say when the ride suddenly jolts to a stop. Your little pod rocking back and forth."

"What was that?" he asks, getting a bit out of your bubble to look around. His lack of proximity makes you sigh in relief before realizing that you are stuck at the top of the Ferris wheel with this dude. 

Hopefully he doesn't try anything…

"Oh my god, oh my god, we're gonna die," he says, completely freaking out. "This is all your fault, y/n." He glares at you with tears streaming down your face as snot pours from his nose as he rocks the cart back and forth. 

You are speechless and have no idea what to do at this moment. All you can hope is that your date won't pee himself next to you in this little pod. 

You look down at the pavement; at least if you fall, you won't have to deal with this guy anymore…

Suddenly, a red feather whizzes by your face. You follow it with your eyes. Turning your head, you come face-to-face with the most beautiful man you've ever seen.

Bright golden eyes staring into yours warmly from behind a yellow visor. Crimson wings beat softly in the air. "Hey there, you look like you could use a hand."

"H-hawks." Your date says addressing the pro hero. "Thank God you're here. Please get me down."

"No problem, folks, I'll get you down; it looks like that machine down there is a little jammed, so you'll have to bear with me." His feathers harden as they whittle away at the steel safety harness that keeps you trapped in the air. 

"Now, don't move, all right? I had to cut the beam to get you guys out of here, so hang tight in those seat belts." He looks at you and holds out a hand. "how about I start with you? Wanna get back on solid ground?"

You smile. "So badly." His hand has a pleasant warmth through it, but right before a hero can gently take you out of your seat. The bench starts to swing rapidly.

"No!" your date screams, unbuckling his seatbelt. "don't take them, take me." he stands and lunges towards the Pro Hero, only to be halted in the air by a cluster of feathers latching to his clothing. 

His arm pushes you off balance, and you slip, letting out a yelp as you wonder if this is the end. Frightfully, you imagine yourself becoming one with the pavement below, the worst end to the worst date of your life. 

Strong arms are quick to grab you, and you are pulled into the safety of the winged hero's chest. "Don't worry, I gotcha," he says softly; the world beneath you makes your head spin. "Hey… Don't look down, you're safe. What's your name?" 

The unwavering care in his voice calms you, and you answer. Out of the corner of your eye, you see the feathers bringing your date down to the ground and setting him on the pavement with an unceremonious plop.

"Serves him right," you mutter, "This has been the worst first date of my life."

"Don't tell me there's gonna be a second." He jokes as his feathers start to free the other passengers, setting them on the ground; he brushes a strand of hair out of your face and winks, "Just between you and me, I think you can do way better than that guy."

Your cheeks heat under the hero's surprisingly flirty banter, and you realize that you are still nestled comfortably in his arms, high above the ground. But instead of feeling worried, you feel strangely comfortable. Your stomach seems to flutter as you are brought down to earth. 

"There you go," he says gently, placing you on solid ground. Although you are safe and sound, you can't help but feel a little disappointed that your short time with the Pro hero has to end so soon. 

"Thank you for helping me out up there," you say, remembering your manners. 

"It was my pleasure," he says; his golden gaze flickers from you to behind you and narrows. "Hey, I hope I'm not crossing a line or anything, but it looks like you may need a bit more saving." He gestures over to your still-sniveling date, who doesn't seem to notice you at all. 

"Ugh, where were you three hours ago?" you chuckle dryly. 

Your little comment sends him into a fit of laughter so hard he has to remove his visor to wipe tears from his eyes. "Sorry, I guess that saving your life was the best I could do."

"And you call yourself a hero," you shake your head and fight the smile on your lips. 

"Can I make it up to you?" he asks earnestly. "My patrol ends in a few, so I could take you home or somewhere else, maybe grab some food."

Your brain shorts out for a moment as you are shocked by this unexpected turn of events. 

Is he flirting with you?

This is Hawks, one of the most eligible bachelors in the country, and he is offering to take you to get food.

"It seems like you are going above and beyond the call of duty," you comment, watching as he tucks his wings to his back. 

"Well, it just seems right," he says honestly. "You look like you need a better day, and I'm starving. So what do you say? Wanna use me as a good old-fashioned rebound?"

The corners of your lips turn upward. "I would."

"Perfect, then let me work my magic, and we can get out of here." he smiles, the toothy grin looking much more natural than the ones you see plastered on the magazine covers. He turns and walks over to a sidekick in an elastic red suit. "Hey, this one is a bit shaken up, so I'm gonna help them home; you got everything handled over here, right?"

They nod, and he turns on a dime, walking over to you with a poorly concealed pep in his step. "Are you ready to go?" 

You nod eagerly. And motions for you to hang on tight to him. Although just a few minutes ago, you were disgusted at the idea of even brushing knuckles with your previous date, being in the arms of the hero is comfortable. 

He launches the two of you into the air, and the wind tickles your face. Leaving your sniveling date in the dust. 

"So where to first?" he yells above the breeze. 

"There's a really good fried chicken food truck near my place if you want to try it out?" you say after a bit of thought. 

His gaze fills with affection, and his laughter rises with his wings. "Oh, I think we are gonna get along just fine."

Tagging: @pixelcafe-network @sleepyyshroom @anjodedesgostoeerros @isaacdaknight @qardasngan @dog55teeth @atigerandabear

[beautifullilacsky]

Babygirl. We have come so far.

Today, your thoughts turned around to the past. They shook hands with the way we used to treat ourselves. It started off on a note I'd never expect it to start off of, though; look at that picture of me, the one in the natural pool in Madeira. The first time I looked at it, I was truly surprised and shooketh. "Damn, I look thin", as to which niklas said that that's how I always look, I am, in fact, thin. I didn't count, but I think I asked him at least 3 times. "Do I truly look like this?" He did say that the angle might be making me look extra thin, but yes. Suddenly, it all clicked. How to him, I can seem so fragile. So fragile that he'd always let me walk first on hikes to make sure the pace is okay, always carrying the backpack himself. The way he is scared of hurting me, like, physically. The picture looks like a tiny, thin, and fragile girl. Yeah tbh, she also doesn't look particularly strong. You can see her collarbones. Her ribs. Her shoulders. Tbh, she also looks a bit like a petshop. I do think the gopro did something with the angle there, u can't tell me my head is out of proportion to my tiny body, lol. My point is. Today, I was doubting whether or not I should eat those cookies. After thinking if it'd make me thick, I remembered. I am v thin, more weight wouldn't be so bad.

I never expected to truly feel skinny. Or well, 'too skinny', at least. To think I could gain some weight; it wouldn't be a problem. That is very new to me. After 25 years. Some of those years being spend hating my body and my belly and feeling overweight, even if my teacher even told me that being underweight is dangerous, her eyes seemingly insinuating the obvious.

Yet here I am. This one picture. And tbh, the other pics or videos of this vacation, don't have the same vibe. So I do think it's the angle. And maybe a bit of a fishbowl effect. Either way. It got me thinking. And suddenly I was thinking of it again: boobs. I am also reading 'the 7 husband's of Evelyn Hugo', who seduced men with her big boobs. Somehow, booby enlargement came to my mind again. Why? It's been so long. I have learned to love my boobs, yet this blast of the past came into my head. Actually,.. it is just a thought. It is actually nice. A reminder of where we came from.

How I hated my body in the past. And here I am. Loving every single part of it. Frankly, I love my boobs the way they are. Sure, they might not be super big, but I don't need to hold them when I run or sprint down the stairs. Sure, they are soft in the middle instead of pointy, but I think it's fascinating how certain temperatures, moods and touches can change that. Sure, they don't touch, but at least it also won't create a hot brew in there or trap my clothes inbetween or underneath my boobs. Honestly, they are truly perfect. (Even the little pimple on there right now. Even though I am a bit scared; is it truly a pimple? It should be, it behaves like one for sure.) I can cup one into my hand; it is a perfect fit. As if they were made to be held so gently and smoothly. So filled with love. So, ... true. My hand can touch all of its beautiful creases. They don't overflow my hands, nor do I need to search to find them. Sure, some might have bigger boobs, but not everyone likes that. Some people get attention just because of it. I am truly happy to be able to say that a lot of people just like me for my personality. The looks are for sure also there, but at least my boobs don't get eye-fucked or objectified. I am myself. Perfect the way I am. And I am grateful to be this exact way. I think my boobs are adorable, they are cute, and truly. Truly beautiful. Thanks boobs, for being w me always. And I'm sorry that I didn't see the beauty of you guys for a part of my life. I am happy that I do now, since a while. Love u, boobies. Lol.

Anyhow. I wish to send myself love letters. See this is a loveletter to one of the bodyparts which I was insecure about in the past. Let me show them some true love, which is exactly what they deserve.

[dog-park-dissidents]

i don't know what to do

First of all, stay alive.

Second of all, be fucking obnoxious. Do not let this unqueer you. Hiding and moderating didn't do shit so go absolutely feral. They think you shouldn't even exist? Fuck it, fisting is SFW now and rotate through a new unpronounceable neopronoun every time someone even slightly misgenders you. They want you to fucking die so live each day like it's your last and stop giving a shit.

Third of all, STAY ALIVE, DO NOT ACTUALLY DIE, specifically do not do it to yourself, ever. You will be okay. And if they want to murder you let them do it with their own shitty little hands, not yours.

Anyway. Take a deep breath and realize that we don't know how bad things are actually going to get. These people are terrifying but they are NOT smart. They have spent the past four years brooding and scheming and making it look like they were coming up with some kind of evil master plan that will actually be effective christofascism this time, but they're still monstrously incompetent. Everyone who was present during the first Trump regime who actually knew how to run anything at all has defected and left. True, they were also the people telling this fuckin nutcase not to nuke North Korea, but that is a level of apocalypse completely beyond any of our control like the fuckin sun exploding randomly, and always has been. Barring random armageddon, it is entirely possible these losers will trip over their own shoelaces trying to actually legislate you out of existence.

Honestly their first priority is probably blowing up the entire economy by putting tariffs on China and closing the border with Mexico. The price of eggs and smartphones are about to get ridiculous, a lot of people are going to lose their jobs, and all of this is going to suck but it very well may suck so much that they'll just forget to ban HRT.

Keep in mind the incoherence of what happened on election night. Trump won and so did a bunch of red state abortion protections. The first trans person made it into Congress. The people voting for the Leopards Eating Faces Party also voted for minimum wage increases, so when the leopards start actually eating their faces it's not going to go over very well. This is probably less America's Hitler and more America's Brexit, where life is going to get noticeably shittier and everyone who voted for it is going to be very shocked and confused about why everything is shittier, but we also won't all die.

Whatever happens it is not above your ability to survive. Hold your friends close. Connect to your local community. If you don't have a local community or you're legitimately stuck someplace where you're the only queer person, then it's okay to run away and never look back, but find yourself your friends, your chosen family. Stick by each other.

Our love will help us break through.

[plutoasteroids]

In Another Life- PAC

PILE 1 PILE 2 PILE 3

This reading is allegedly for entertainment purposes only. I am not responsible for any choices made in accordance to my readings!

TW: MENTIONS OF DEATH, G@MBLING AND G@NG AFFILIATON READ AT YOUR OWN RISK YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!

This reading is to find out who your past life lover was

PILE 1

Your past life lover was someone very in control, they had a desire to always protect and be the one to bear all the burdens regardless of if they were male or female. This person felt like home to you they may be coming back as your lover again in this past life there is a soul tie between you both. Anyways, they have a lot of inner strength nothing really tore them down they constantly thrived to be better and honestly most of the time things never worked out for them but they never gave up they kept going, they were always so confident and held themselves with high regard no one could point anything out that could be remotely awful about your person, they were quite likable and attractive and was always the leader never the follower. In this lifetime they are bound to continue striving to be the leader and keep doing the best they can while also balancing being human as in letting themselves feel their emotions instead of living life like they are a robot.

For some of you it could be in the 1800's, In this lifetime they are born in the 90's or you were born in the 90's but 90's holds significance. England, Paris, Germany specifically Berlin, Japan, Switzerland

PILE 2

Your past life lover was very resourceful they could always turn a situation good or bad in their favour. they are quite smart and cunning, they were the type to run circles around you without you realising until the very end that they tricked you. Because of their ability to be able to talk themselves out of a situation they felt like they didn't need to work for anything. They could just trick anyone into doing whatever. They could have used any means necessary to get their way like their appearance and words which honestly may have led to a lot of issues for them down the line especially financially because eventually people caught up to what they were doing and in a way they were shunned and they needed to find a way to turn things around and change and I don't think they managed to do that in that last lifetime so in this new lifetime they will have to learn to be more humble and hard working instead of using deception to get their way. For some of you there is a chance that you will be with them again this lifetime but for the majority it's very unlikely.

(Bonnie and Clyde as well as Elvis Presly could point to just time eras not that they were affiliated with them but who knows maybe they could have)

England, early to mid 1900's, Elvis Presley, Bonnie and Clyde, France, Germany, World War 1, Cambridge, G@mbling, g@ng affiliation.

PILE 3

Your past life lover was constantly burdened by one thing or another mostly relating to not having enough money to do something else. Your past life lover may have been a sailor or fisherman and passed away quite young. Whatever they tried to do to make ends meet never seemed to work for them it was just loss after loss. They worked so hard with absolutely nothing to show for it after all that hard work and it was such a frustrating situation for everyone involved because they were always plagued by poverty and never having enough. At the end of the day when all that hard work was over their only source of happiness or peace was YOU. Things never seemed as awful with you around. Things did eventually get better, but it was a long and treacherous battle to getting to that stability and unfortunately, they didn't live long enough to enjoy it. They were plagued by illness at a young age and passed. Unfortunately, in this lifetime I don't see them being your future spouse.

Ancient Greece, Egypt and Rome, Papyrus, boats, tan skin, white, gold

[therandompagesblog]

SKZ Mate Chapter 21

Trigger Warnings: Smut, orgasm, cunnilingus, oral play, reader squirts, threesome, trichophilia, salirophilia

"You are such an annoying shit!" Y/N growled as she smacked the wolf with the towel. "Did you have to call him out?" "Hey. Hey. Stop. Omega." Seungmin growled as he tried to catch the towel that was repeatedly smacking him. "I'm sure you're not the best pleaser anyway. Minho might be better." The wolf growled, baring her teeth at the beta. Seungmin smirked and grabbed the towel, dragging her body towards his so he could grab her legs. The female squealed in shock as he grabbed her and pushed her body against the backdoor, his hands resting underneath her ass. "Shall we find out little puppy?" Seungmin taunted. "If you were so desperate for my attention you could have asked." Y/N mimicked his tone, testing the wolf's patience. Seungmin chuckled at her attitude before kissing her harshly. His teeth smacked against hers as he shoved his tongue into her mouth. Seungmin was relentless as he kissed up her neck, biting every so often he fancied before returning to her lips. Y/N could feel her arousal creeping up on her and she knew Seungmin could smell it. It was almost hard not to feel the way she did. His mouth was hot and wet. His fangs were sharp they made her shiver in delight. "Hold on to me. I'm not taking you to the garden. I'm not that cruel." Seungmin breathed out as he opened the door to take her to the living room. "Are you not?" Y/N challenged and Seungmin gave her a wink before throwing her onto the sofa with a growl.

Seungmin pulled her down with another growl before he leaned to kiss her, yet he didn't. His lips ghosted over hers, making her whine out in frustration, but Seungmin ignored her. Instead, he grabbed the hem of Minho's jogging bottoms and ripped them. Not caring about the item of clothing in front of him. "What? I'm an impatient man." Seungmin answered with a grin. As soon as the bottoms were desgarded he snapped the band of her underwear clean off before quickly spreading her legs, not wasting any time to prove he could definitely please her. To her surprise Seungmin was slow and attentive as he licked through her folds to her clit. The padding of his tongue laid flat against her. His rhythm started off slow as he built her up, carefully he flicked over clit. Occasionally he would suck before he came back down to her opening, teasing her entrance with his tongue. Her soft little breathy moans hardened Seungmins cock but he did not care. He wanted her to cum. He wanted to see her release. Seungmin sped up and paid extra detail to her hardened bud, edging her closer and closer until she came. "I mean. You tried." Y/N breathed out causing the wolf to glare at her, ready to start again when Felix walked passed. Y/N threw the wolf off and wrapped the blanket around her so she could mostly check on the wolf. "Felix. Felix." Y/N called out.

Felix turned around and looked at the sweaty female wolf curiously. He could see the frustrated beta behind him. "Are you okay?" Y/N breathed out. "I am alright. Come here." Felix pulled her hand and took her to the kitchen so she was away from Seungmins glares. "I'm sorry, Y/N. I wanted to talk to you but I didn't know what to say to you. I didn't want to say the wrong thing and I didn't want you to blame yourself. Honestly, I never wanted to kill anyone. I don't like fighting. I mean I don't like it when Chan argues with me so killing someone was hard. I felt sick and it made me hate myself. I hated myself more when I saw your face. Wooyoung was your alpha and you loved him and then I killed him. I didn't even know what to say because despite being angry at you, I never wanted you to ever think it was your fault or feel bad. I am sorry. I will always talk to you about anything baby, but this was hard." Felix's confession made Y/N's head swell. She appreciated his honesty and recognised how valid his feelings were. No one was meant to like killing. It should always be a last resort or an impossible resort. "I wasn't angry at you, ever. It was hard because I watched the person who abused me die. It was weird. I felt felt relief, but sadness, but I never held it against you. Your feelings are valid. No one is supposed to kill. But anyway it's fine. I want us to be fine." Felix appreciated her words. He was grateful for her being so understanding. "Come here, my love," Felix whispered as he pulled her closer, careful of her blanket as he kissed her softly. Felix's mouth was salty. She could taste the sweat on his tongue as she pushed harder, causing Felix to grip the towel. "Did Seungmin not please you," Felix murmured as he pulled her head back to deepen his tongue. "Need Lixie to make it better," Y/N whined. Felix smirked and put Y/N onto the counter, dismissing the blanket that was wrapped around her. "Mmm. Lixie make it better baby." Felix whispered as he planted his forehead against her, his fingers teasing her opening, while his thumb massages her clit. "Felix is sorry baby. Felix loves you so much. Gonna make you cum baby." Felix whispered as he teased her opening before sliding two fingers into her wet hole, causing her to gasp. Felix slowly slid in and out of her causing her to whine, her hips thrusting forward. "Can I taste you, baby? Hmm, let me taste you?" Felix whined, his soft pouty face aroused her. He was teasing her. She knew he had another face but he wasn't showing it. "Baby?" He cooed. "Yes. Yes." Y/N answered and gasped when she felt his mouth on her clit. His rough sucks sent a wave of emotions causing her to cum all over Minho's counter, but Felix didn't stop. Felix brought his head up to watch her as he slowly entered a third. "You gonna cum for me again baby?" Felix teased as he pressed harder into her, causing her to let out a panicked groan as he pulled out slowly only to slam into her harder. "Felix." Y/N gasped as he watched her, flicking his wrist slowly but harsher before thrusting faster into her. The sound of her wet pussy being fucked by Felix's hand sounded dirty. Her slick was seeping out as slid down Felix's hand. "Such a pretty wolf, aren't you." Felix cooed as he nuzzled her face. "Has your Felix been forgiven?" "Yes. Yes." Y/N reached out to pull the wolf towards her, her hands pulling Felix's hair as she kissed him. Felix growled at her actions, it was turning him on.

"Can I have her back now." Seungmin called out, causing Y/N to glare at the wall. "Go on before he gets grumpy. I'll clean up." Felix answered as he kissed her lips, before she headed into the living room to see a dangerous Seungmin who patted his lap. Y/N rolled her eyes and sat on his lap with her arms crossed. "Such a sulky puppy." Seungmin chided. "Such a sulky puppy." Y/N mimicked sticking out her tongue for him to catch, his nails digging into her tongue, causing the female wolf to look dumbfounded. Seungmin smirked and spat on her tongue, his saliva sliding down the side of her mouth. "Does puppy like being spat on?" Seungmin growled, letting go of her tongue before flipping them over, his hands pushing her into the sofa with a glare. Seungmin winked at her, his amber eyes glowed and his fangs appeared, making her nervous at his animalistic presence. Seungmin lowered his head down to her wet glistening pussy that was already leaking her silky slick all over again. Seungmin gave her one flick of his tongue before grazing her sensitive bud with his fangs causing her to grip the sofa. She had never experienced anything so primal in her life. She was scared but so excited at the same time. Seungmin growled and flicked her clit with his fang again causing her to whimper. He had her right where he wanted her. The wolf grazed his mouth harshly over her pussy before he meticulously fucked her with his tongue. His sharp fangs scraped away at her causing her to let out an orgasmic scream. Her panicked scream caused Felix to burst through the door in worry as he heard her. He was unsure if she was enjoying it or petrified at Seungmin's wolf, but seeing her flushed skin and blurry eyes, she seemed fine, until he stopped. She was so close to the edge and he stopped.

Seungmin laughed at her, as he patted her wet pussy. He could see she was annoyed. Her blue eyes glared at him. She was so undeniably desperate. "What is it puppy? Hmm. Do you need to release it? Too bad." Seungmin answered. "You're so mean. Let her come." Felix stated as he walked over to kiss the sweaty female wolf. The female wolf grabbed and pulled him down to her, desperately latching on to his mouth. Felix obliged, kissing her softly as his hands reached under Minho's jumper to play with her hardened breast. "Why don't you order him to make you come," Felix whispered. "He has to listen. Alpha Hyunjin ordered him to." "Seungmin. Don't be so mean. You have to let me come. Please." Y/N whined as she watched the wolf's hardened eyes. "Alright puppy, but only because I have to. Once tomorrow hits I'm gonna punish you." Seungmin warned as he dived into her pussy, his fangs almost piercing her skin. Felix lifted her jumper so he could suck on her breasts. The sensation of both betas hand sent her into an overdrive causing her to pull at their hair. Felix didn't seem to mind and almost orgasmed every time she yanked him but Seungmin seemed to get more pissed off, that every time she did it, he would nip her thighs.

Seungmin and Felix continued to please her all afternoon, sending her into several orgasms, one after the other, each taking it in turns. They expected her to stop so they could cuddle and eat but her drive kept going and going to the point the two betas got worried. They had made her orgasm seven times and she still begged and cried, to the point she wanted them in here. They had her on the sofa, over their laps, at the coffee table even in the kitchen. It would not stop. They were afraid they might have triggered her heat accidentally, which was a good thing, but they needed Chan back. Technically they didn't need him, she could have anyone of the wolves she felt comfortable with but it was mainly the fact that Seungmin was getting tired. The obnoxious male had started to regret antagonising her and his hand was beginning to ache. He even joked about getting a dildo from the shop to help since they were not allowed to fuck her yet but Felix warned it was still a bad idea because she was healing, even though they both had slammed their fingers into her. Still, she was still begging and crying at the beta's for more release and Felix couldn't even get hold of one wolf. Felix tried Chan but his phone was off. He called Hyunjin twenty-four times but it went to answer machine. Seungmin in the end had to send an SOS message to their group chat in hopes one of them would see it: "HELP! I think Y/N's gone into heat! We need backup." Felix even responded with a light-hearted message in case the wolves panicked, "We can do it but I think our little wolf may need an alpha because Seungmin hasn't gotten the alpha stamina." And yet the two beta's had no response. They were left all alone with an incredibly feral female.

Taglist for the iconic readers:

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[snailchimera]

Speaking as someone who was able and willing to get the fuck out of Florida, it was the right thing to do and I don't regret it, but it fucking hurts. I miss my home. I miss my shitty toxic eutrophic bayou and my lizard neighbors and liveoaks with Spanish moss and palmettos and honeysuckle that is probably invasive and tiny stubborn canebrakes and sandy patches of scrub. I miss bugs, which is not a thing I would have predicted saying, not because I dislike bugs but because it never occurred to me that other places were so bug-deficient. I miss the cluster of left-adjacent people ranging from peace-and-love Unitarians to the serious union folks or the people running a grocery co-op that actually functioned as a grocery store normal people could buy food at to the folks fixed on one specific problem like housing or healthcare to the anarchists and the socialists and the queer community spread through all of the above and That One Communist whose sole purpose in life seemed to be hawking a newspaper, all clustered together because you can't afford to splinter into two billion different factions in a conservative town full of gun nuts, and honestly probably being a more functional group because of it. I miss streets and buildings that used to be fixtures in my life, landmarks that told me exactly where I was. I miss stupid small things like the art on my library card, the sound of a road, an absolutely objectively terrible park that was always full of glass and spent fireworks the day after New Years or the 4th of July. I miss my best friend from middle/high school (though we're still in touch), and at least a couple members of my family, and my dad's weird friend who wrote absolutely godawful political poetry and hand painted beautiful cards for holidays and once tried to steal my pet turtles to turn them loose in the nearby river (which would have been bad as they were a nonnative species).

I have missed multiple funerals I should have been at and I don't think I'm ever really going to get closure for that.

I've been living up north for over a decade now and the air still tastes wrong. The seasonal shifts here are beautiful, but in the way an alien planet is. It is literally physically impossible to acquire a decent orange or orange juice that tastes like it's actually meant to be a consumable foodstuff here, and I didn't even grow up in orange growing country so it's not like my standards are fresh-picked-today high.

And I didn't really leave a community behind the way OP would have to. I was always pretty isolated, all things considered.

I'm out of Florida, and also alive in general, because an internet friend took me in and inexplicably hasn't kicked me out yet. That's not a viable plan for most people. And, although I am spending more money than I can really afford to renew a passport I've never used, it's very unlikely I'd be able to find sanctuary in another country with my disability, spotty work history, and lack of money. Even if I could, there are people I can't leave behind.

I do think you should get a passport if you can. If you have the money, help other people get one too. It's useful documentation, and if it comes down to it... a Hail Mary escape plan is still better than waiting to die. But the people brave enough to keep fighting for their homes aren't stupid, and the places they love are worth fighting for. The people who can't leave are not acceptable losses. And most red states are red because of deeply entrenched systems of disenfranchisement and suppression.

Just care about people.

I see a lot of posts along the lines of, "people stay in Florida because they can't afford to leave," in reference to both climate disasters and Republican politicians.

I don't see enough, "because it's their home, and leaving under such conditions is traumatic, even if they can afford to drop everything and leave."

I wish people would stop telling me "just move" when I talk about the problems I want to fix. I wish people would stop telling me "it's a sunk cost, you should just leave" when I try to encourage political participation and community involvement. I wish people would stop asking me "lmao why" when I say that I love Florida. I wish people would stop asking me if I "need help leaving" when I have never declared any intention to do so, and have been quite vocal about how happy I was to move back to Florida after a long time away.

I know this land, I know this community, I have deep roots here. I'm tired of everyone telling me to rip them up and "just leave" when I'm trying so goddamn fucking hard to try and help make things better.

You might just see a gross swamp full of rednecks, but I see the sides you refuse to. I see the humanity, I see the communities banding together, I see the beauty, I see the hope. I see the climate activists advocating for our people and our environment, engineering new ways to mitigate hurricanes and update our infrastructure. I see the groups fighting for immigrant rights, racial justice and reparations, affordable housing, organized labor, abortion access, and disability justice. I see the queer organizations carving out space and helping trans people access healthcare. I see people fighting DeSantis tooth and goddamn nail at every single opportunity. I see the reasons to keep fighting for this place that everyone else has written off as a cheap punchline.

I wish y'all would stop ignoring us when there isn't a deadly hurricane or a Florida Man headline, and I wish y'all would stop treating Floridians like we're either helpless victims or horrible bigots with zero in-between.

Some of us are doing our damnedest to make things better. Some of us love Florida with every fiber of our being. Some of us think of Florida, and before anything else, we think "that's home."

It feels pretty fucking bad to constantly see people say your home should be abandoned. It feels pretty fucking bad when the entire rest of the world refuses to see your home as anything but a joke or a problem.

Florida is beautiful. Florida is my home. I'm going to fight for it no matter how many people reading this think I should just pack up and abandon it.

[aihoshiino]

chapter 165 thoughts

Aqua Hoshigan Status: It's Officially Hoshinover

Chapters Until The Story Ends Without The 143 Kiss Being Addressed Or Acknowledged: 1

damn i guess they really did just kill his ass

I'm gonna be so real with you gamers, I kind of don't have a lot to say about this one either lol. Which I acknowledge sounds completely wild given the Everything that happens in it, but most of my meat and potatoes analysis in these reviews comes from breaking down characterization and we're flying through everything at such breakneck pace that we're barely getting any characterization.

It continues to drive me bugfuck insane that Ai is completely absent from this finale despite the importance of 15 Year Lie. Its imagery is plastered all over but whenever we return to it, we just see Aqua. Not only that, but Gotanda is the one who insists on pushing the movie through for Aqua. 15YL as a story about Ai's true self and her tragedy is now officially taking a backseat to being about Aqua's tragic death and legacy. It was already bad enough that we spent so much time in the Movie Arc not actually focusing on Ai to the extent that, as everyone pointed out, based on what we saw on-page it was basically a Sad Kamiki Movie, but this really is just pissing right in the wound at this point lmao.

The funeral scene also serves as the final nail in the coffin for any Secretly Alive Aqua copes, which is kind of a relief. I still don't like how Aqua's death played out, but I think dragging it out for four chapters then going "sorry you thought i was /srs when i was just /jk" would have been infinitely more insulting. I don't like this ending, but I can respect that Akasaka seems to be sticking to his guns on it, even if we still do have like a whole chapter left for him to whip around and go "I WAS /JK ALL ALONG!!!!" but I don't see it happening.

Anyway, yeah! The funeral! Uh. Is it gonna sound weird if I say I felt kind of like… grossed out reading this the first time? Like, I really don't know how else to explain the visceral "why the fuck is the author making me read this" reaction I had to it. I think it's just because Kana is so fucking distraught here and the drama is just so hammy and so over the top that it feels kind of… ech. I dunno. I just really didn't vibe.

It doesn't help that this is part of a much broader pattern in the back half of OnK of Aka getting us right up close into the gory details of a character's complete mental breakdown and suffering and then spend zero time or focus on their recovery. This happened with Ruby all over the Movie Arc and this many times and with this little runway to the end of the series, it just starts to feel exploitative, like a way to cheaply pull at our heartstrings without doing the work to build everyone back up after tearing them down.

also pre-emptively dreading all the fuel this is going to add to the fires of People Who Are Weird And Misogynistic About Kana but she could die saving innocent children from a burning building and people would find reasons to be shitty about her lmao

we really are not seeing ruby's reaction to finding out her brother was dead huh lol

I will say the one thing I didn't Actively Dislike about this chapter was Ruby, though. I was honestly starting to get pretty skeeved out with how many people were gleefully predicting or actively wishing for her immediate suicide purely for ship motivated reasons and I was also worrying that the story was going to pretend that Ruby doesn't like. Have a life and support system outside of Aqua. Yes, she should absolutely be affected by his death but this period of her shutting down only to drag herself back onto her feet that we seem to be getting feels way more in line with pre-Movie Arc flanderization Ruby and I'll take that W where I can get it.

god. I haven't even talked about Kamiki's supposed serial killer cult. I just don't have the strength. Like… that's self-evidently stupid, right? I don't need to explain to you why that's ridiculous and unbelievable? You don't need me to tell you why it's fucking crazy that we're getting this information about the alleged overarching antagonist of the series not only in the second-to-last chapter of the entire series but after he was already dead, right? We can just move on? Ok good. jesus christ.

FINAL CHAPTER NEXT WEEK…

[epiphainie]

I totally agree with you. I think Tommy’s freak out was probably derived from past experiences of his. And him being afraid of getting hurt again which I think is fair.

I was honestly optimistic on them resolving the situation by having buck reassure him that he does see a future with him and that he can be his first and his last. And would have come back stronger from it.

And then those interviews hit and just like that… it’s over?

it's literally the interviews that threw me for a loop bc nothing makes sense. the way tommy was in every part of the previous ep, the previous ep ending with that hopeful scene, there being no negative signs for them ever, the breakup scene following josh's words about people like him and tommy making bad choices in fear sometimes. i won't even mention the general picture with last year's interview stating that they wanted tommy bc they wanted a love interest that could be written easier into the show and wouldn't fizzle out and the optimism for buck's storyline going forward looking different. like all of this feels like building ground for this to be a wrench in their relationship that they resolve and get stronger in the aftermath. i didn't think for one moment it was permanent while watching till i saw the interviews.

[summercreolefanfictioner]

the scent wafts in, her name making him beg on his knees chap 5 || touya x fem!reader [modern au]

chapter summary: Touya takes a trip down memory lane, reliving all his days as a host and how it changed his world for the worse.

themes: mentions of prostitution, sex, SA, abuse, violence, etc. (YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED)

notes: this one really has heavy themes and I want you all to be aware of the warning cause yeah; oh btw this is fem! reader but all is written in 3rd POV so y/n will be referred to as "she/her"

masterlist

Touya knew about sex when he was a child, and no amount of porn and eavesdropping could make him discover this fact. It wasn't like he accidentally found a stash of porn magazines or DVDs in the house or he walked in on someone doing it. He knew about it when the adults were talking, specifically his grandparents (more like his mom's parents). They were talking about Rei having another child with Enji after Fuyumi, and that's when he heard the word he shouldn't have.

Sex.

He knew about that word when he was tasked to fill out his basic contact information, and what he knew about it was his gender. It took him a bit of searching on a random dictionary to understand what it really was, and he suddenly dropped the book as he covered his mouth in shock. The gasp he was about to let in suffocated him as he deduced things in his head and learned later on how the birth of Natsuo and Shouto changed a lot of things in his perspective.

Sex. Intercourse. Coitus. It was all a chore his parents did to bear an heir for the Endeavor Corp. But for his childish mind, they were trying to replace him, and it made him see red.

He wanted to say he was good enough to be like Enji, to be his successor. But no, Enji rejected the idea of him being the next CEO. For Enji, Touya was not good enough. He didn't need an heir who drives himself mad when he can't achieve perfection. He doesn't need an heir who shows weakness in his sleeve.

It ruined Touya that he couldn't look at relationships the same way as he entered puberty. Whenever he sees a few of his classmates dating or talking about "Hey, I stayed over at my girl's place when her parents were away" or "Well, I couldn't ignore her especially when she's being like that to me," it made him think: Relationships are a facade. Romance is a lie. Virginity is a concept they play to make themselves feel they attained innocence. Pleasure is just the side effect of it, but it's nothing.

------

He was 22 when he agreed with the manager's suggestion to have side work as a host for a club at the Red District every Monday and Friday. Honestly, he half-expected a few customers to ask for a kiss on the first try or even a hug or basically any form of physical intimacy. Surprisingly, most of them only wanted male attention, someone to talk to when they get off work or when things get stressed out, or just a harmless, casual date because they couldn't find a man that would give them the treatment they wanted.

Another thing Touya learned: he didn't have to act like he was so nice like a Prince Charming like some of the hosts do. He was just naturally there, talking when he was supposed to talk and serving them drinks like the gentleman they thought him to be. So there were no hookups or casual sex or any bookings of hotel rooms afterward.

That was until he met his regular customers that things took a downturn for him.

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1. The one who's visibly disgusted by the man she would be marrying

Touya met her every Friday, and he already knew from the get-go that she was the typical rich daughter who went by her parents' bidding; someone who never touched bad things. Well, except that night. She decided to go to the Red District for the first time and heard about this secret host you can book. He had heard her family name somewhere, probably when he was still in high school since Enji and Rei would have the four of them attend important events. It only occurred to him then how popular she was with the way the other hosts were staring and whispering to themselves.

It was when the other hosts talked to him in the locker room and told him that she was hiding a lot from the media because apparently, she was marrying this famous celebrity producer who went after gravure models; that it was an arranged marriage and she obviously abhorred the fact that she was getting wed off to an old geezer.

When she talked to him about meeting up with her on a Saturday night at a booked hotel room, Touya already knew what she was up to. There was extra money involved, plus her promise that she wouldn't be booking his services after. The arrangement worked well with him, setting aside his personal feelings over the matter, as he had sex with her, making it seem like he knew the ropes when he clearly did not. Everything was all thanks to porn and all those gravure magazines he saw from his classmates in high school.

When she cried afterwards, something about being relieved that she didn't spend her first time with a perverted old man, that was when Touya's heart constricted with heaviness. He didn't understand what he felt back then, but after leaving the hotel, he spent away the last of his expenses drinking and smoking before returning to work like nothing.

------

2. The one whose loneliness cannot be fulfilled by her own husband

He dreaded this one regular, and he wished he told the manager that he didn't want to entertain this woman. The first time she booked Touya, he thought she was just a regular customer who wanted nothing from him until she started placing her hand on his thigh one night, and a few nights after, she asked if they could meet outside. Touya was stressed over her and her silly antics, even though she was just asking him to eat lunch at her recommended fancy restaurants and stroll around town.

Well, it wasn't like she was overly clingy or demanding; it was the fact that Touya had no idea what she had under all that nice adult woman facade. It was only when they met up at a coffee shop that she told him about her circumstances. She said, "My husband and I cannot divorce, and he knew about this arrangement and didn't mind as long as no one knew. I also don't mind since he has been sleeping with other women for as long as I can remember." This irked Touya and reminded him of his parents' arranged marriage. He knew they didn't cheat on each other, but it made him think about how the media and paparazzi painted the Todoroki family as a loving family with toothy grins and blooming flowers.

What made this situation worse for Touya was how the woman decided he meet her every weekend at her shared house with her husband. Touya had already met the man, and he knew from one look that all he cared about was knowing who his wife was sleeping with and reminding him that the two of them were only to have a sexual relationship and nothing else (not like he was looking forward to moving things further with a client anyway).

They would always have sex in the guest room assigned for them, but sometimes the wife would take a risk and have them go all the way to the master's bedroom. She would reason out that it wasn't like her husband was so faithful not to bring women there inside since she caught them before in the said room. Touya learned she was insatiable as hell and would try a lot of her fantasies on him because her husband deprived her of trying out exciting things.

Their last sex was of Touya wrapping her legs around his hips as her back hit the bathroom wall and the hot shower poured down on them. After the high, Touya told her he wouldn't be entertaining her anymore since the risk of their arrangement was catching up on him.

------

3. The one who wanted the boyfriend experience

This one was simple, and Touya kind of liked her because he was able to forget his shitty childhood and family issues. She basically became a friend in many ways, and her reason for hiring Touya was because she wanted the boyfriend experience, kind of like having a secret lover especially now that she had gone adulthood and wanted companionship. Touya wouldn't say it was fun being with her. It was just okay. She would ask him to hold hands or ruffle her hair or tell her the corniest shit that he had ever said (he was still embarrassed remembering it, but he managed to set aside his shame over her.)

It became apparent that something was amiss when she visited on a Friday night, displaying unease and nervousness, punctuating the air with sighs as he handed her the drink. He was about to speak when she blurted out, "There's a guy at work, and he said he saw me with you, and he confessed. He asked me if I wanted to date." Her face was beet red as she made a mess of her hair, probably remembering the said confession in her head. "Dabi-kun, what should I do?! Do you think I'm a good dating material?"

Touya wasn't in love with her, but the way things were happening, there was that familiar feeling again when he had sex for the first time with his first regular. That dark pit in his stomach prompted him to do something bad and run away instead of facing them properly. It was easier to drown everything

He placed the glass on the table and said, "Give it a try. You never know what might happen."

He never saw her after that, and he didn't take customers for a while. He spent his weekends drinking and smoking until he fell asleep.

------

4. The one who struggles with a husband's cuckolding kink

Touya was weirded out by this customer because usually, it was only the woman who stayed in the room waiting for him as he served them one of his best alcohol concoctions. It was on a Monday night when he had a married couple as his client. Great. Before, it was often the wife who came in here. Now, they bring their husbands into the mix, he thought bitterly as he sat on the couch. At first, it was awkward with the way the wife was trying to lighten up the mood by telling fun stories as her husband drank and watched them from the corner. Honestly, Touya could not care. At least he was getting his usual drink. If this evening turned out shitty, then so be it.

Suddenly, the husband stood up and knelt traditionally (seiza-style), bowing before Touya as he begged, "Please have sex with my wife!"

The wife went to his side as Touya stopped midway from his drink, his mood worsening as he was yet again reminded of this one regular. However, this time he thinks it is different as the wife assures him there is no need for him to kneel and beg because she can do fine without sex, which the husband is opposed to. And the two went on to discuss his cuckolding kink, how he would only get turned on and have sex with her once he was done having sex with someone else.

Touya narrowed his eyes in disgust, leaning on the couch as his cold voice cut through the conversation.

"Aren't you two being rude?"

The couple were ashamed, bowing at him for their lack of respect and quickly explaining about the matter at hand. According to the couple, they've been having problems in the sex department because of the husband's cuckolding kink, something about getting turned on by the fantasy of his wife having sex with someone. Touya obviously groaned in disgust and was about to protest, dismissing their request and not wanting to partake in their weird shenanigan, something about the charade setting him off even further than before. The husband wanted him to have sex with his wife just so he could take her afterward. How revolting. Why did the manager let them in this place?

"This will only happen once, please!" The husband added. "We will make a formal contract." Then he gave him his business card. "You can call me if you change your mind."

Of course, Touya doesn't call him. He doesn't care. He will do the usual. Yeah, he tells himself this as he realizes he needs more stash of money so he can live for the next month (not like he was running out; he was just being careful.) So he finally succumbs to temptation and calls the man up, meeting them in a fancy restaurant as Touya read through the contents of the contract.

The contract was fair and just for all parties, though. For one, the husband will not watch or record Touya and his wife having sex or any act similar to the matter. It also indicated that this would only be a one-time thing between the three of them and Touya will be paid a hefty amount on the same day the act will commence. Touya also added a few things in the agreement, which included no BDSM or anything similar and that he would not be doing any acts that would "impregnate" the wife (since a few of his customers before liked the idea of breeding, and he didn't love it.)

When all was said and done, Touya got into the business and did everything like how he did before, masking all his emotions and pretending there was so much pleasure and thrill in embracing another man's wife when there wasn't. It was vile even, knowing that the husband was willing for his wife to be disrespected just so he could give her the love she deserved. The worst part? She liked touching him, hugging him close as he thrust even further, or kissing his lips like she owned him. Touya wanted to push her away and tell her, this was just sex and she was crossing some sort of boundary. Then again, she was a customer. It's not like he hadn't been paid to give a kiss before.

Afterwards, he took a shower and left without a word, carrying the check with a large sum as he headed to the bank that day. Touya slept that night convincing himself everything was a nightmare; a horrible shit he went through because he needed to survive.

------

5. The one who likes sharing everything with her bestfriend

Touya had been hearing stories from other hosts about some customers booking them together and having awesome threesomes, that there was no greater feeling in the world than having more than one woman with you in bed. He wished he had the same sentiment because honestly, he doesn't find what's so fun about threesomes. It was tiring and disgusting beyond means, and he still couldn't fathom the fact of sharing a lover with another in bed. Gross. Gross. GROSS.

But he had to experience it because of two women; one, a sultry vixen who believes the world is in the palm of her hands, the other an alluring shadow of her own existence competing to be in the spotlight. The first one meets Touya every Monday and the other on Fridays, and he could see a recurring pattern in the way they both lead conversations. The vixen liked herself so much, and it was apparent. So apparent Touya could even bring a tall mirror and face it on her so she would brag about how this one guy tried to seduce him at the bar a few nights ago or when her co-worker's boyfriend tried to date her in secret. She would even mention being scouted as a model but rejected all offers as she wanted to be an IT developer.

On the other hand, her bestfriend was shy but nonetheless had this air of confidence. Touya could even remember how one of the staff members asked him about her because the guy genuinely was attracted to the way she was so elegant and dainty. Her posture screamed princess vibes as she held her glass of champagne and talked to Touya about her modeling job. Touya could even tolerate this one better than the other as she wasn't being a bitch when they have an actual conversation (because he swore he dreaded every Monday seeing her).

Until one time, the two of them asked him to have sex with each of them on different days as a part of his off-duty job. Touya was already guessing, "They're gonna invite me to a threesome soon" because the way they had sex with him was always "Did she do this to you?" or "Am I more fun than her?" like they were openly comparing themselves to each other to him. And he knew they talked about it. There was no doubt.

And they did. They invited him because they shared things with each other. Because they liked the same guys. They hated the same guys. They loved the same things. They also hated the same things. They're twins from different mothers, and Touya only wished that this whole shit would go down the drain and this would be the last he would have them, thrusting up and down as the two women ground their pussies on his shaft. Their throaty moans were getting mixed in, and he bit his lip to hide his moan because there was no way he liked this. He hated this. Hated everything with every fiber of his being.

After the whole stint, Touya finally handed in his resignation letter and left. He was tired of pleasing people; weary from all this nasty chore he had been doing for the sake of living in hell.

------

Touya later learns that love and sex can coexist. When he encountered his (only) ex-girlfriend while working as a bartender at Shigaraki's bar, he found himself perplexed about how to navigate this new dynamic. They initially started as smoking buddies in the back of the building, exchanging crude jokes until they eventually exchanged phone numbers. He genuinely enjoyed spending time with her, but eventually, their connection faded into nothing.

Fun. It was what they only had next to nothing.

Her name was Ruka, and she had her long dark hair dyed blonde as she dressed in the same black outfits as him but feminine. She was all guts and foul curses, her red lips smirking teasingly. He knew from the moment they put a label on what they were that she would expect a lot from him as her boyfriend. Dates. Movies. Late-night talks. Smoking and drinking together. Hugging. Holding hands. Having sex. Touya tried his best to be the boyfriend she wanted even though he had zero idea of how to be one, and he believed at the time it was because they were dating. It turned out to him that he was simply repeating the same train of thought.

Dating is a chore. Sex is a chore. Relationships are nothing but a chore.

He was simply doing everything out of responsibility, not fully caring about himself or how Ruka would feel. He was a tad selfish that they fought a lot and he didn't swallow his pride or compromise even. He would go about his way proving his point and if he didn't, he would slam the door and leave for days, spending his nights at the bar and making it his new home. Ruka also held her pride so high she didn't even find him or apologize, and they would fall into this toxic pattern of seeing each other again after a few weeks then making out and having sex and brushing everything under the rug because emotions are getting into the way of their fun. There was no way they were ruining whatever this relationship was for a sappy one-on-one of calling each other out and promising to do better.

Touya didn't change, and he grew tired of being her dream boyfriend. He still leaves his clothes on the floor. He doesn't tell her where he went. He never goes the mile to update her. He drops by her space whenever he wanted to despite her telling him to just move in. He ghosts her and then comes back like nothing.

He was being pathetic, and she was being overbearing. She cries, thinking he will relent when he sees her tears. It doesn't change his mind though. He just gets worse. They would throw things at each other and curse. They would raise their middle fingers. They would throw hands and he'd give a punch in exchange for her slaps and hits.

Touya just left and never came back after.

------

"She was a lot different," Touya mentioned his girlfriend (the current one he thinks about so often) again to his therapist. "I know I told you this before, but the first time we did it, everything just made sense."

He didn't know how. He just felt it. It all came full circle. That morning had him almost running in fear, scared at the thought of going deeper with her because he knew he would hurt her. He will not give her whatever she wants. Those dreamy things from romance mangas? Those corny lines from romantic movies with sappy storylines? Consider them all trashed. There was no way he would give in.

But Touya will stay around. He knew to himself that he would die the moment this shit was all over; that she had changed her mind and wanted those romantic stints from the screens. But staying around didn't do it for him—especially for her. Just because he stayed around didn't mean he got what he wanted. He loved her, so, so much; yet she was sleeping with a man who's a figment of his own false identity. It was toying him upside down, especially with the way she looked at him with adoration and pure sincerity when he knew it wasn't really him.

"I want her to love me," he stressed out. "Only me."

next chap

masterlist

[pieflavorpie]

My unpopular opinion is that i dont enjoy bards Lament. At all. It is objectively good, well performed with appropriate buildup. However, I am a child with an absentee father, and i have had similar thoughts to him before, and i used to have a friend that went down his path. I have seen and experienced every point of view. And what that was isnt justice. Its not calling people out, or making them realise how they have hurt him.

Its a very broken, depressed man who finally snaps and burns down the bridges with his friends. No, VM never asked for Scanlan's mum's name because that's not something they do. If you can list me 5 times where the team ask questions about peoples backstory [before Bards Lament] BEFORE it became relevant, then you have successfully proved me wrong. Anything revealed is either probed out of them as part of recon, or willfully offered as a piece of friendship.

[E.g: Keyleth talking about her aramente, Pike's history with Grog vs Percy's backstory being revealed after they get invited to dinner with the Briarwoods and Grog talking about his pack when its revealed his uncle has the vestige.]

And he never offered any of this information. There have been several times where VM have shown concern and actively asked how hes doing just for him to lie and shrug them off. They prank him while he was asleep because they think hes a fairly centred person who will enjoy an attempt to bring things back to normal and they were drunk.

And yes, they are mean to him sometimes, because they are a group of assholes. They never disguise themselves as anything else. Vax and Percy's friendship post-briarwoods for a good while is based in distrust and self loathing, respectively. Everyone has moments where they say mean shit to Grog [except Pike] because he cant understand it.

And the "without his songs hes just a guy" comment or however it was phrased was a tactical comment. Because he would be. He doesn't have any sort of weapon beyond Mythcarver which he refuses to use, and he doesn't have anything else he can use to support or fight. The same applies to Keyleth without her nature magic, it applies to Percy without his guns, it applies to Grog when people are out of range.

And no, I don't blame him for snapping when he woke up. I doubt taking a -4 to any rolls made would translate to a Happy Peachy character in-story. And all of his internalised misery finally coalesces in his tiredness. But what happens isn't good. It isn't progress. It is showing everyone a wound that has been tearing open over months, and then promptly storming out.

And his whole "I didn't want my daughter to see me like this." Isn't some Grand Show of how much he cares, it shows him as fucking selfish. My dad being weak is what drove him away, his insecurity stopping him from getting help from my family. That line of thinking is what makes him a sad, lonely man rotting in a flat after abandoning many families like my own.

That man in real life was strong, a brilliant teacher of martial arts. A true marvel to see and train with. He had a certain charisma to him, but he had his shortcomings. And when his partner got too close to them, he'd hold them tight to his chest and scurry away, only coming back for the drunk sex and eventually leaving entirely. Having enough distrust in his heart to claim any unwanted children to be illegitimate.

Now, Scanlan is nowhere near as bad as him, but there are similarities. And enough that I feel my word has weight when I say, if I were Kaylie, I would not want to travel with him. If he truly wanted to be closer to her and do good for her, he'd get better first. And to get better, you need people. Plural. You cannot depend on one person. And that person can absolutely not be your own fucking child. I'm not saying he should've stayed with vox machina, but he should've stayed with a group. A group of adults that could support him. And honestly I feel like so far from my watching of CR, his epilogue with kaylie is the most unrealistic character development possible. I know she's supposed to be rough and hardy, but I refuse to believe that girl would not be breaking under her father's bleeding desperation for validation. And I definitely refuse to believe that she could actually help him to the point he'd gladly leave her on another continent while he talked to the people he'd snapped at.

Anyway, fuck dickhead dads who don't get actual help. Especially fuck them when they start depending on their children for them to be a good person.

For those who do not know. Scanlan's departure from the party in the stream wasn't as... friendly. It was kind of an ugly break-up. It came from Sam wanting to do some unexpected twist with Scanlan's character and it led to a very emotional moment. That he did not feel validated, that he did not feel appreciated and that he was considered a joke by the group.

And it came down to one phrase from Scanlan to the group: "What is my mother's name?" and when nobody was able to answer the question. Scanlan left.

However, interesting little tid-bit that might help understand this change. which comes from one of the Q&A. which is no longer up because... uhm... a whole other Drama I am not here to explain.

And what Sam said in that Q&A is that there WAS one way in which Scanlan would have stayed.

And it was Pike. who wasn't there at the time (technically was as an NPC, but since Ashley wasn't there, it's the same thing), but which Sam said was the only person who could change his decision.

And what has Pike done the entire season? BE that person who supported Scanlan in his darkest moment, and who deflated the situation probably without meaning to. And so he is able to leave the party in much better terms.

A shame because the emotional rollercoaster that it involved will be missed, but hey, it's cool to see what Sam meant by saying Pike was the one person who could stop Scanlan walking out of the party like he did