#but Hawks' ending development here is very disappointing for me

[oborofollower7]

Ima save my thoughts about how the MHA manga has ended until the very last chapter because ima be real with you all...

my review aint looking good; believe it or not, Kurogiri isn't the only reason why.

[transhawks]

I'm seeing a lot of people (not just one or two) express disappointment about the Twice and Hawks lack of confrontation. I want to just say, in all seriousness, there's something being ignored here and it has a lot to do with people not understanding Twice and why, even if it would do a lot for Keigo's character development, it wouldn't be good for what and who Twice was and meant in the narrative. Even aside from the clones essentially not being Twice, I think people are not realizing the war arc has been the villains' Bad End in so many ways. That there was a lot of dramatic irony in how they ended up and that included Twice.

In a sense, throughout the war arc, none of this has been Jin, and that's good because even the idea of there being any Twice sentience among would remind me of this:

The idea of Jin not being an original would have sent him into a mental breakdown.

So, just the idea of Twice being used like this - with no original, no concrete way to himself, there's a horror aspect to this. In Toga's grief (righteous and needed as it is because SOMEONE needs to mourn Jin), she has also created Jin's Greatest Nightmare. Any closure from this wouldn't have been "real". Or it would have been just Keigo reconciling with what he's done, which is still on its way, but would be very one-sided. There's no Twice there to really tell Keigo off. I understand where everyone is coming from, but there's a lop-sided interest in Keigo facing consequences (which he has and will continue to), but little understanding or care that this isn't what Jin would have wanted. Jin wanted to be himself, and trusted, and surrounded by the people he loved and lived for. Jin feared not being the real original clone. Would have there been a real good narrative reason to use what would have been Jin's greatest fear to propel Keigo to self-actualization? Jin and Hawks represent the first attempt at saving a villain, a league member, in this manga, and Hawks failed. And he needs to come to terms with that by himself.

[bluecladone]

Ngl if Varric dies in DA:TV it's going to severely impact my enjoyment of the game. I'll still play it, of course. I'm not the type to completely write a game off because of a plot point i don't agree with, to make no mention of the money spent. I'm sure the game is fine as a whole and I want to see Solas's story--and by extension, the DA setting--come to a close. But God, to kill off Varric of all characters...more under the cut.

Like don't get me wrong, I'm a huge fan of angsty, high stakes, kill-your-darlings type of plots, but it MUST have some kind of point. Killing Varric right at the start doesn't really serve much of a purpose. Like we don't need any motive or other driving force when we've been given plenty enough already a la the events and ending of Inquisition. We're well aware of the stakes. Killing Varric away from the people who loved him best (Hawke and crew, or whoever's left) surrounded by strangers (with the exception of Harding and Solas) would be such a disservice to his character. Add in extra yuck with the way EA/Bioware treated his writer, Mary Kirby. It just feels like an extra 'fuck you.' Besides, using him as such a heavy marketing tool for years only to kill him off is so cheap.

Maybe the writers didn't know what to do with him. (And maybe this is a direct result of Mary Kirby's layoff) Maybe they were afraid of the criticism they'd get if they just wrote him into retirement. I get it. Varric is a notorious busybody who shoulders a lot of responsibility, and he's so tied up into the story at this point. He's had a hand in most major plot points in the series. Not everyone would be satisfied with the retirement card. But the guy is getting old. I'm hoping and praying that they'll just settle with destroying Bianca and maybe injuring him enough to where he's like 'I'm way out of my league here, plus I've got a city to run. Time to pass this along to someone more capable.' He'd make a good advisor/mentor figure--there in the background, but still involved with the plot just enough. I feel like the team was so worried about people being disappointed that they couldn't have him as a companion that they jumped to the extreme to give us a good reason why and a chance for D✨️R✨️A✨️M✨️A.

Honestly, I wouldn't mind so much if they chose to kill him at the end, or shit--literally any point besides the very beginning. It's the last game in the series. Much like in Mass Effect 3, the world as we know it is ending and the stakes are ever higher. Not everyone is gonna make it. I know nothing is confirmed, but the set up in the trailer is so obvious. As soon as Varric tells Rook to take care of things, i got a sick feeling. Maybe they'll surprise us, but I doubt it. It's hard not to be cynical after hearing about the layoffs at Bioware and watching in real-time the development hell this game has gone through for the last decade.

Like imagine in Mass Effect Andromeda, say someone like Garrus or Liara shows up only to die right at the beginning of the story. They had no effect on the plot, other than explaining to Ryder the plot of the last 3 games to let them know why what they're doing here in the newest game should be important to them. Then they die to kickstart the plot and for Ryder to shake their fist at the villains and exclaim 'this time it's personal!' Ryder doesn't know Garrus/Liara. They met like a week ago. Plotwise, the moment falls flat emotionally when we know that Ryder wouldn't mourn Garrus/Liara as much as we know Shepard might. It should go without saying that a character dying would impact your main character more if those characters got to know each other throughout the story, but it's what I'm saying. I think it's better to shock your characters more than your audience.

And that's what this is. Shock value for the audience, to make us clutch our pearls and shake our fists at whoever is responsible for a beloved character's untimely demise. To make us care about a plot we're already invested in, and have been for 10 YEARS. Or maybe to get away from the uncomftability of having a character with an arc they don't know how to end gracefully. If they go the way I think they're going, anyway. Fingers crossed so so so hard that they surprise me.

[allmannerofmalady]

Disgustingly long ramble about Dragon Age, love letter to my Inquisitor and... idk anymore

Ok so apparently, I can become so attached to a game/story that I can develop post-game depression... without even finishing the game?! At my ripe old age??

After 35ish hours in Veilguard, I realized I wasn't happy with how I was feeling, and more superficially, how my Inquisitor turned out and it was breaking all kinds of immersion for me 🤡 I played around with the character creator a bunch and then just closed the game and haven't restarted it since, and that was 4 days ago. I think that says a lot about why I was playing - I was playing to wrap up Inquisition.

I have a thirst to ramble, so a lot of Dragon Age (and a touch of Baldur's Gate 3) talk ahead. Spoilers, I guess?

The things I'm disappointed about with DATV haven't faded with time like I hoped they would. But, I will say that I’m also starting to get very emotional about the Solavellan ending which I was not a fan of when I first saw the spoiler. Whoever posted the flycam footage of the ending on Twitter, thank you!! It soothed my sad little heart.

My feelings aside, I'm happy for people who are fully immersed and enjoying the game, and I was truly hoping to be in that camp immediately :')

DA2 was my first Dragon Age game, and I love the shit out of it and that merry band of misfits. Marianne Hawke, the woman that you are. DA:O is one of my favourite games of all time as well - when I can get it to run because it always crashes on me.

But DA:I, for all its faults, just hit something very personal for me. I have played it for countless hours, been continuously immersed, and I have leaned on it a lot during crappier periods of my life. The things people hated about it (the Hinterlands, fetch quests etc) I found almost... relaxing? Meditative? I used mods to fix banter issues and would just roam, always changing my companions out to get that extra bit of dialogue and lore.

I know it has its issues and the combat annoys a lot of people, I was kind of indifferent about it, but to be fair I always play a Rogue/archer in DA , so I can't speak too deeply about the other classes. Once I discovered guides and videos about the best gear to craft, the best paths for leveling up, my Inquisitor was a beaaaast and I did enjoy the combat, as simplistic as it may be. Again - truly my comfort game.

I replayed DA:I in the months leading up to DATV, with my beloved canon Lavellan Inquisitor, Solas romanced, the whole journey. It was my first DA playthrough after 700+ hours spent in Baldur's Gate 3, and I remember the thrill at having a voiced protag again - for all the stilted moments (it's a feature atp with DA games) my Inquisitor still feels so real to me, especially after playing a voiceless Tav for so long. Yeah, even the infamous "WHAT'S GOING ON HERE" lololol

I just truly fell in love with the character I HC throughout the years, and I really really love the companions. Even the pricklier ones. I loved the intrigue, the politics - whatever, I loved it. Warts and all. The overwhelming lore that I learned piece by piece over 3 games, through codex entries and novels and art books and comics.

The DATV discourse has somehow become even more draining. It's hard to have a genuine discussion when trying to speak above the incessant bile being spewed by bigots who are hating the game blindly and are going out of their way to hurt anyone who enjoyed it, was excited about it, reviewed it - the vitriol is insane. Then came the waves of actual fans loving it, being disappointed, hating it, hating others for loving it, vice versa... and it goes on. Which I guess kind of happens every BioWare release lol but the 10 year gap feels like it's exacerbated everything.

I'm not even going to try and parse through my heartbreak at the dissolution of the Keep, player choices, and what DATV puts forward as happening in Southern Thedas. I have read the discourse, I have heard those who support it - and I just cant pretend to be ok with it. Months before DATV came out, I put together a slideshow of Chantry-level propaganda to convince my BG3 co-op friends to give DA a chance (heheeee) and one of the reasons I hooked them was that CHOICES MATTERED. Your world state mattered, the lore was incredibly rich, it was your story, and was such a key feature of BioWare games that even when other negative feelings might fade, I just don't see myself letting go of that one.

As for the Solavellan side of things... I think that most people who love Solas (myself firmly in that camp) are very attached to the character and the storyline, especially if they chose to romance him. He's just an endlessly fascinating character, and he will forever be iconic to me and part of my video game/fantasy pantheon - romanced or not. The first time I played Trespasser, I was blown away by the magnitude of the revelations, it felt like a Greek myth being played out. The burdened Inquisitor, the hand that led them to glory starting to kill them, the trickster God, once a trusted companion/lover. Euuuuufff I have never gotten over it, and after my, quite frankly, extreme emotional reaction the last few weeks I don't think I ever will.

I don't know if any ending would have filled the gap of the 10 year wait, to be fair. A game full of Solavellan scenes and dialogue would have been bitterly unfair/ridiculous for those who had different stories and relationships in their game. I am pleasantly surprised we got a scene (for a moment there, I was starting to lose hope), but again, I sorely wish it was fleshed out, on par with the Crestwood scene, or the magnificent climax of Trespasser. I think it took the flycam footage and Trick Weeke's Q&A on Bluesky for me to start to see past the disappointment and enjoy the scene for what was (I'm ignoring the Varric in the room and lots of other things rn, thanks for asking).

Everything else - I will try DATV again later and start with a clean slate, and accept that this is the game we got and not the follow up to Inquisition I had always hoped for. I feel like I have to caveat that I recognize that is MY issue, it is not a read on anyone who is enjoying it. My emotional attachments make me biased, not an asshole lol. The cliffhanger of DA:I always made me feel that the story was not over and the stakes were so high - and I'm realizing how much I wanted to continue that chase with the Inquisition to the end. That’s in addition to the end of bringing in player world states, the destruction of Southern Thedas - it’s just all a lot to accept. What was it all for?

All I can say is, as much as I am conflicted- I will always love Dragon Age from the bottom of my heart for giving me this world to play with and escape to. I hope to be back to Thedas once the feelings subside, after the highs and lows of the last 10 years. I would like to wrap up my Lavellan’s story, at the very least.

In the meantime, I have turned to my ~other comfort game of BG3 to finally start a post-Patch 7 run. And it all starts with a very confused and slightly worse for wear Lavellan on a mindflayer ship, with a fade touched left eye and arm somehow intact. (I realize the immense irony of taking a Dragon Age break by playing another game as my DA character but idk what to tell you). She is a Ranger/Wood Elf (see what I did there), with a suspicious bald man in a suit of armour talking to her in her dreams (SEE WHAT I DID THERE?). Anyway, she's probably going to kill a TON of Goblins, try to avoid the charming wizard (mage) hung up on his Goddess ex (!!!) and then climb mount Halsin. Good for her <3

[arrenkae]

Some more Veilguard thoughts:

The siege of Weisshaupt was straight up amazing. 10/10 no notes. I have so many feelings about the Grey Wardens. For all the problems with other factions - they did really well with the Wardens, actually. Maybe unpopular opinion at that point, but I did not like their portrayal in Inquisition at all. Here, it hits all the right notes, just the right mix of heroic, deeply flawed and doomed by the narrative.

I also now feel that a Grey Warden Rook would make for the best story, since we're fighting against the villains who caused all the blights and now are bringing about another mega-blight. Would also make more sense mechanically - yes, previous games also hand-waved us fighting against the darkspawn as non-wardens without getting blighted, but here it feels especially jarring. Mega-blight and all.

Actually, thinking about all that? I feel like the faction system is one of the main problems with the game. It seemed cool at the beginning, but got disappointing really quickly. The way everything has to be divided between The Factions feels really artificial, and makes for some of the weakest narrative points - the elves only being represented by the Veil Jumpers (who are not even a proper Dalish clan!), the Crows becoming a bunch of batman-style good guys, only one area in Minrathous, the Lords of Fortune... just everything about them, to be honest. Hell, even class specializations are tied to the factions - why?? I understand that they were implemented in the game at some point in development and it wasn't that easy to get rid of them. But I still wish we could just be a Grey Warden with more race reactivity (because there is VERY little race reactivity compared to the faction reactivity and I'm disappointed)

Still, the Mourn Watch, even without being particularly story relevant, are super cool. I love everything about them. Emmrich is one of the best dragon age characters EVER. Even if the rest of the game was total shit, meeting him was totally worth it.

I also ended up really liking Davrin. I was worried he'd be overshadowed by Assan - but the thing is, even though a large portion of his dialogue and quest line deals with Assan, it still directly relates to his own character and who Davrin is as a person. The weight of responsibility, the struggles of raising Assan right - it's all very well done. It's not just about a cute pet being cute. Also, as I said before, the Grey Warden stuff hits unexpectedly hard.

Rook keeps giving me "constantly smiling through the pain" vibes. Playing therapist for your party is nothing new for an RPG protagonist, but in this game, with all the nice domestic interactions we see between the companions, being unable to join the party banter (why?? we could in Inquisition) and Rook always acting friendly and supportive, it really feels like we're this part of a friend group who always solves everyone's problems but then gets left out of all the fun group activities. This is probably unintentional, but I think that with time fandom will embrace this characterization for Rook, just as it did with Hawke being a colossal fuckup. It's kind of interesting and tragic, in its own way. Still not a good way to write an RPG protagonist, though.

[alialioxenfreeee]

After 85 hours I've finally finished DA:TV for the first time! And I need somewhere just to throw out my thoughts. Will tag spoilers appropriately of course + will post it under the cut to be safe. SORRY IN ADVANCE, THIS POST IS LONG. I HAVE A *LOT* OF FEELINGS.

So before I yeet all of my emotions into writing I want to immediately say that overall I did enjoy Veilguard, very much, and I don't regret buying/playing it for a second.

The first few quests I remember feeling how happy I was to be back in Thedas and it felt really good. I made an effort before its release to ignore pretty much any discussion, good or bad about veilguard because I didn't want to go in with any swayed expectations. And I think that helped me enjoy the game so much more.

Won't go through everything I liked because this post would be fucking gigantic (and it's already BIG) , but overall the companions were great, loved the quests, the areas were beautiful (Treviso my beloved) and the supporting cast was great too.

Now to the...other bits.

To start I have to mention the development hell this game went through. I remember in the years prior reading how many hands this thing changed, all the Bioware cuts etc and saying "Oh this is never going to release." And the Dragon Age story overall, with all its characters and side plots and backstories, is BIG. And they were NEVER going to fit everything from the past three games into Veilguard. To cover all of the loose ends likely would have needed another half of the game, to at least do it well.

Of course this doesn't mean I wasn't disappointed with the way some things went. How a lot of prior choices weren't carried over and characters were straight up retconned (goodnight Kieran, sweet prince).

But I think the devs needed to make a choice between actually trying to give DA a decent shot at "ending" (I'll get to that) and going back and tying up every loose end from the past 4 games. And there were a LOT of those left in every game prior. I did genuinely think we'd have Fenris maybe mentioned in the Shadow Dragons for example, that he was out there shoving fists through Venatori bodies etc. But they were never going to cater to every single person's wishes in regards to who they brought back. It sucks, but that's how it is.

I also wish, very VERY much that The Warden was at LEAST mentioned somewhere. Even if it's a small cameo. Last we heard they're out (sometimes with their love interest depending on choices) looking for a cure for the Blight. I did like the cameo of the chalice in the Joining, and how it was one of the few things recovered from Weisshaupt. But just some mention, even if it's a letter or a report or something that they're out there would be nice. Maybe they send The Wardens what information they've found and you uncover a very small but slightly better way at defeating the blight. Obvs Hawke had their moment in DA:I and the Inquisitor had their moment here but it would be nice to have a nod of recognition for the one who started this whole thing off.

One last bit before I get to the ending rant but as a lot of people have already pointed out, I do wish that we got just a little more interaction with our Love Interests. Also, not sure if I was just unlucky (I romanced Lucanis, it was...slower than I expected BUT I don't regret it ultimately) but I got FAR more "hang out" mini quests with Taash and Davrin than I did with Lucanis, my LI. I did enjoy those mini quests, but even the ability to share a small moment with them like in Inquisition (a lil' smooch!) would have been nice.

hhh okay the ending.

IT WAS........okay????

We were, admittedly, warned before the game even came out that there would be "sacrifices" and that "not everyone may survive" but...the way that you had to choose between Davrin or Harding to die defending you was harsh. I think they were trying to stress the seriousness and danger of the situation, given that in DA:I for the most part everyone survives fine.

This was (at the time to everyone's knowledge) the LAST DA game, so they had to really up the danger factor. But because of how little time the team had to stop Elgar'nan's plan, there was little to no time to reflect and absorb the losses. The team points this out too, but even after the game ENDS there isn't a chance to run around the Lighthouse one more time and have some aftermath chats. I get that the deaths / kidnappings were used to push Rook forward in a way, to show that they weren't trapped in their Regrets like Solas was, but for me it didn't have the weight that I think it should have.

The Evanuris / Stopping Solas bit I actually didn't mind. I got the "Secret" ending and putting in the time to learn about Solas, to defeating (or convincing) Mythal to help put a good word in etc wasn't a bad way to wrap it up! Maybe because I am one of the few people who isn't a solasmancer lmao, but I was actually okay with how all of that culminated.

I mentioned it prior but GOD I wish we got the chance to at least run around The Lighthouse one last time after it was all done, or just something other than the quick slideshow recap. I quite literally (not kidding here) yelled "THAT WAS IT?" at my screen when I got taken back to the main menu lmao. I have so many questions left yknow? Like, is Neve (The one that got kidnapped / blighted for me) still blighted, or did they figure that out? Her mention in the slideshow doesn't cover it. And although yeah, your team got to have one last moment with you before the final fight, I really wanted to chat with them again after it was over, especially my Love Interest! It would have been cathartic. Rook never really got that moment to finally deal with all this grief and pressure and stress that they'd been carrying and I think it would have "humanized" them a bit if they had such a moment.

And in regards to the "Secret" ending bit...

Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh??????? So there's some even MORE secret bad guys who were pulling the strings on all the other antagonists from the past few games?? It's like that meme in the church where there's constantly another shooter aiming at the last one in front of them.

I don't really know how to feel about this. I'm sat here thinking back through all the previous games' antagonists and how apparently it wasn't completely their own will and decision to do what they did, but that they were ALL being secretly guided and influenced? I can SEE (mainly in Veilguard) the tiny little glimmers of foreshadowing. The "Storm" thing the original Qunari ran from, what Anaris was afraid of etc. But they'd already retconned a lot for Veilguard alone and now it feels like a lot of what made the past games great is going to be changed, slightly.

It's far too early to really tell, of course. Bioware have said they're now 100% focused on ME5 (And I am weeping with joy as it's my favourite game series of all time) and ofc they haven't even so much as mentioned a sequel (probably the execs need to see how well Veilguard does and will make a decision based off of that) but...I guess we'll see!

As I mentioned, way, WAY earlier (if you've actually come this far I am so sorry. I just needed somewhere to dump my thoughts. Tysm for actually reading my rambles) that OVERALL I did enjoy DATV. It wasn't a perfect game by any means but I am very thankful for them continuing DA's story, even if it's not completely the way we expected / wanted.

They have mentioned there are zero plans for a DLC but god I think it would help, like a mini Citadel DLC. Catch up with companions and supporting characters, have better scenes with Romantic Interests, give your Rook the moments they deserve to really process and come to terms with everything that's happened. But I guess, there's always fanfics!

Okay that's pretty much it. Sorry again for the giant walls of text, but I needed this lmao. Aaaaand just as I finish this I see that they released an N7 Day Jacket for the game, ffs. Time to replay, I GUESS.

(Not yet though, the FFXIV update is around the corner and I need to deal with THAT, first.)

[thyandrawrites]

Looking back on it, I remember watching a few videos that encouraged the viewer to give Endeavor a chance. I ended up doing just that with mild hesitation given Horikoshi’s “interesting” way of handling him and you know what? Ol’ Enji proved to a be a bigger disappointment than I could’ve imagined! Here’s to hoping he gets prison time since I’ll be disappointed if he rejoins his family free of charge.

Honestly I think that a good portion of the people who praise his "growth" don't know the difference between show and tell. Or don't think that atoning goes past the simple will to do better. Because Enji's actions don't line up with that will at all. Which, you know, could be compelling if done right.

You want Enji to be resistant to change? Cool. You can absolutely write that and show how he went into atonement with the wrong mindset. You could focus on unmasking how his motivations are still selfish, and make him fail to get the one thing he wants as a result.

Like, it's canon text that he approached atonement as a challenge to prove himself in the eyes of his family. Not because he actually wanted to help them, but because he wanted to be the recipient of their respect. And it's also canon text that he got sucker-punched in the face by Dabi's reveal because he thought he could simply sweep the past under the rug and start afresh, with his pride intact, never owning up to it ever again.

It would've been a no-brainer to build off that and make him either persist in that self-obsessed avoidance and miss his chance at atonement altogether, or grow up and actually face the fallout of his actions. But instead, the narrative seems intent on making him run away from every responsibility, and then patting his back and praising him for his stagnancy by calling it development instead. All because heroes are the protagonists and they can't ever look bad.

It's all... Very frustrating tbh. I don't know how people can watch him ignore Shouto and Touya to go chase after All for One and not realize he's literally still the same cowardly man who refused to face his son and threw himself into hero work to avoid his duty as a father. The only difference is that now Deku and company lick his boots and call him a changed man for it.

I don't know why horikoshi chose to go this debatable route of softening Enji's character, especially since his writing never stopped focusing on how he's still neglectful and selfish. I supect it might be marketing logic, or editorial interference, since they have to sell merch and promote stuff and a black and white bad guy as the pillar of "moral" society is counterintuitive. But it seems to me like Hori doesn't want to write him actually changing. He takes every chance he gets to throw more dirt on the man, to paint him as an unsympathetic and almost groteque-looking monster, and all his better sides are only ever told but never shown, and blandly at that.

So while I don't think prison is in the cards for either him or Hawks (or any other hero tbh), I'm still... Very perplexed by the obvious lack of clear direction for his character. As I mentioned before, it seems like Horikoshi himself doesn't know what he wants to do with Enji's atonement. The story keeps throwing dices blindfolded, so one week he's a bad guy who can't possibly be excused, and the next everyone around him is kissing his ass, and both options are true and false at the same time. And this is played straight. And apparently some people find it satisfying...?

[ticklishfiend]

The Persuasion Machine (My Hero Academia)

Lee!Bakugou / Ler!Class 1A Girls ⚠️PLATONIC⚠️

(A sequel to “Pure Gold”: read that first!)

A/N : sorry it took me a while to get this one out! school has been terrible and i’ve been sick with migraines for days but hopefully this is good enough! i’m working on another mha fic rn so hopefully i don’t quit on it lmaoo. hope u enjoy!

Summary : Bakugou begrudgingly attends the girls sleepover Mina has invited him to so she doesn’t blackmail him with incriminating material. When he doesn’t answer one of their gossipy questions the way they wanted, they decide to use a little persuasion to guide him their own way (leading to some interesting results).

Word Count : 3461

REBLOGS ARE GREATLY APPRECIATED!! MWAH <33

-

Bakugou had been dreading today from the moment he agreed to attend this stupid ass sleepover in the first place. Since when did he start caving so easily to puppy-dog eyes of all things?! His friends were starting to make him go soft, and this is NOT something he needs hanging over his head while trying to become the world's number one hero. Especially not from someone who now knows his deepest, darkest secret; he absolutely loves romance anime.

He couldn’t help it, the stories were always so compelling and they drew him in every single time without fail. Sometimes he’d catch himself getting emotional at the worst of the worst shoujos out there, but dammit if he didn’t love a good confession scene, alright?! There’s just something so satisfying about the build-up, the angst, the tension, all of it is just enough to make the stone-cold, stoic future pro-hero shed a few happy tears. He really couldn’t help it. Especially considering he’s been having feelings of his own for someone recently, so that mixed with those heart wrenching scenes..it’s impossible not to cry, okay?!

But now that he’s got someone else who knows this secret about him, he can’t allow it to get out there in the world. Mina is one of his most trustworthy friends, but she’s also the most inclined to gossip. She’s not one to turn away from good blackmail material, and now that she was lying on this pot of gold there was nothing that could turn her away from it, not even good old-fashioned tickle torture like he had already tried. It seemed Bakugou’s real, true, only option at this point was to attend that dumb fucking sleepover and get this shit over with once and for all.

So that’s what he did. Even though he tried his best to ignore the nagging dread building up as the day slowly dragged on, the moment he heard that excited knock on his door at 6 that evening, he knew there was really no escape. He was being forced against his will to have...fun.

With an exasperated sigh, Bakugou trudged from his bed over to his dorm door, throwing it open only to be attacked in a vicious hug by a flash of bright pink. The girl held his arms tightly against his sides as his eyes drooped in annoyance, Mina letting out an excited little squeal as she tired bouncing the boy up and down in her hug.

“Eeeee! I’m so excited, Blasty, you have no idea! Tonight’s gonna be the best night ever!” She giggled giddily, finally letting him go before grabbing his wrist and quickly leading him out into the hall towards her room. He growled at the contact, though didn’t put up any resistance. Better to just get this shit over with and let the little nuisance have her fun, Bakugou thought as they finally reached the door to her room. He could hear chatter from the inside, assuming the girls had been hanging out for a few hours before Mina had decided it was time for her little guest star to arrive. She placed him a little ways away from the door, standing in front of it and facing him with a wide grin. He was taller than the girl, having to look down to her in order to see the bright smile that seemed to be plastered onto her face at all times.

“Okay, so, here are the rules for tonight: don’t be mean. This is a FUN night, I don’t want you ruining it for the rest of the girls, got it?” She pointed an accusatory finger up towards his face. Bakugou only lowered his eyelids in response, obviously annoyed. She sighed, rolling her eyes. “Okay, fine, you can be a little mean, but only because we find it kinda funny sometimes. Just no making anyone cry!”

Bakugou huffed, crossing his arms over his chest and throwing his eyes towards the ceiling. “Fine. No one will cry.”

“Good. Next: actually try to have fun with us! Don’t just sit there all mopey like you’ve done during dorm game nights. Actually try!” Mina entangled her fingers together and held them up to her cheek, giving Bakugou the biggest, most pathetic little puppy eyes the explosive teen had ever seen. “Pretty pleeeeease?~”

“Good god, Pinky, I get the fuckin’ idea! I’ll try, alright?! But if you show that video to ANYONE, so help me god you’ll never see another sleepover for the rest of your damn life!” Bakugou shouted, and though his screams would be terrifying to anyone else, Mina only chuckled in response, throwing up a thumbs up towards her taller counterpart.

“Get ready, Blasty, cause this is gonna be great.”

-

Bakugou couldn’t help it. He was stiff when he first arrived, feeling awkward and out of place. This wasn’t his territory, wasn’t his environment. He was surrounded by giggly girls who wanted him to play their little games and gossip, and it just felt...wrong at first.

And it just kept getting worse.

“Soo...Hagakure...any new interesting developments with Ojiro?” Mina grinned towards the floating pair of pink pajamas rested on a purple bean bag. The other girls all giggled, Tsu even shoving at Mina playfully with a funny scowl on her face. Bakugou knew what they were talking about, and he was not interested in this conversation at fucking all, and for more reasons than just general annoyance.

“I mean, just the same old same old I guess. Not that that’s a bad thing! I’m loving how we are right now, he’s just so sweet and loving and...yeah. It’s going good,” the invisible girl shifted in her seat, and though they couldn’t see her, the smile on her face was blatantly evident in her voice. “Have you guys got any crushes you wanna discuss?”

Jirou’s face turned bright red, though she remained silent and frozen in place. Mina spoke up first. “Nope! Not for me, at least. Still waiting for the day I’m a pro and can finally try to win some with Hawks. God, that’ll be the fuckin’ day,” Mina sighed happily, and Ochacco just giggled and punched her shoulder playfully.

“You won’t get within two feet of the guy before he files a restraining order,” Uraraka said snidely, making the girls laugh. Even Bakugou had to stifle a small chuckle behind his palm.

“Hawks, huh?” Bakugou finally spoke up, leaning his back against the wall and crossing his legs on the bed. He decided the best way to speed tonight along was to engage in their conversation. It couldn’t be that bad, right?

“Ohoho yeah. What, you tellin’ me you don’t think he’s hot?” Mina chided, looking up towards Bakugou from her place on the floor.

“Didn’t say that. And I didn’t say I was shocked either. ‘Course you picked a pro to crush on and not anyone you actually know,” Bakugou said mockingly, but it only prompted a sadistic grin to appear on Mina’s face.

The pink girl quickly popped from her spot on the ground and up onto the bed with Bakugou, Momo, and Jirou, leaving barely any room on the space. “Hey, what the f-!” Bakugou started, before Mina plopped herself cross-legged right in front of his face, and evil look glinting from her eyes.

“Who do you have a crush on then, Blasty?” Mina’s grin was face-splitting, and the look in Bakugou’s eyes gave her everything she ever could have wanted.

“Crush?! Why would I of all people have a fucking crush!? I don’t like people!” Bakugou shouted, though from how close Mina was to his face right now, it was impossible for her to miss the small tinge of blush on his cheeks. She was striking gold again already.

“I don’t believe you~” Mina sung, her two index fingers wiggling at his chest in teasing mockery. “C’mon, Bakugou, you’re so easy to see through! Just tell us and noooo one has to suffer!”

“The fuck are you talking about?! I don’t like anyone, end of discussion, okay?!” Bakugou shoved Mina away from him (not too forcefully, of course, just enough to shove her towards Momo sitting on the pillows). Mina sighed with a smile, shaking her head with tuts of disappointment.

“Y’know, I didn’t want it to have to come to this, Katsuki Bakugou, but you really leave me no choice,” Mina looked around at her friends with a knowing but evil shine in her eyes, and they all perked up with understood smiles, and Bakugou couldn’t help the tinge of fear he felt shiver down his spine. “Girls...I think it’s about time we introduce our guest to the ‘Persuasion Machine.’”

“The fucking what-!? -hey! The hell do you think you’re doing! GET THE FUCK OFF ME!” Bakugou shouted as all the girls pounced on him at once, all grabbing at him for an arm. Tsu, Uraraka, and Hagakure all took his left arm, while Jirou and Momo prompted for his right, each of them holding onto his limbs back tightly enough where he was restrained. Mina plopped herself down on his outstretched thighs, now uncomfortably close to his face.

Mina wiggled her fingers out in front of the boy’s face, and all at once Bakugou understood what was about to happen. This wasn’t just persuasion. This was revenge for last night.

“You’ve got one last chance to talk, Katsuki. Who do you have a crush on?” Mina spoke in a low interrogator voice that would usually be amusing to Bakugou if it weren’t for the fact he was very obviously about to be tortured by tickles.

“NO ONE, PEA FOR BRAINS! LET GO!” Bakugou pulled at his arms, but in all honesty...he chose not to put up that much of a fight. He wouldn’t let the girls know this, of course, but...if he’s here to let them have fun, then dammit he’s gonna let them have their fun, even if that means sacrificing his dignity even just a little. At least it’s these girls and not anyone who’d actually judge him.

“Fine. Have it your way,” Mina smirked, looking towards her friends restraining Bakugou on both sides. “Girls, pin him.”

Before Bakugou could even blink, the girls had him pinned on his back against the bed, now sitting on his arms.He tried to move them, really move them that time and...nothing. Shit. Oh shit. He was actually restrained now. He really couldn’t move at all.

Fuck.

“Pinky, I swear to god if you fucking touch mE-” Bakugou grunted, locking his jaw together when he felt those evil, evil acrylics scribble on his belly. He squeezed his eyes shut tight, tossing his head to the side trying desperately to distract himself from those skittering fingers that never relented.

“Ooh, little ticklish, Bakugou?~” Mina teased, pushing his black tank top up just slightly to reveal his toned but quivering belly. She scratched her nails along his sides, making him grunt out a giggle much to his dismay.

“NO! I’m nohot!” Bakugou giggled as her index finger scratched right below his belly button, his face twisting up in a smile he absolutely despised. “FUCKIHIHING QUIT IHIHIT!”

“Wow, he must be really ticklish. He broke pretty fast,” Tsu spoke bluntly, and though she was only rationalizing the situation, her words somehow felt so teasing to him in the moment, making his giggles go even higher pitched than before.

“Right? Mina’s barely touched him and he’s already giggling,” Jirou chuckled from her side, her eyes never leaving the giggling boy below her. “Can’t wait to see how he reacts when she really gets going.”

Without warning, Mina began kneading her thumbs into the sides of Bakugou’s belly. The explosive teen threw his head back in mirth, cackling and just barely kicking his legs out behind her.

“NAHAHA! STAHAHAP! FUHUHUCK YOHOHOU!” Bakugou spat out between his cackles, prompting Mina to gasp in mock shock.

“Well I never, Bakugou! Is that really how you would speak to your bestest friend in the whole wide world?” Mina moved her fingers up towards the bottoms of his ribs, sending him into a whole new wave of giggles and cackles, digging his heels into the bedsheets. “Aww, are your ribs sensitive, Blasty? You real ticklish here?~” Mina pinched at his bottom ribs quickly, and Bakugou was hysterical.

“GAHAHAHA! NOHOHO! I’M NOHOHOT! QUIT IHIHIT!!” Bakugou laughed, tugging at his arms restrained by the girls on top of him. “MINAHAHAHA!”

“Oh my god! He never calls me by my actual name! We’re actually getting through to him!” Mina shouted in excitement, slowing her tickles til she was just resting her nails on his ribs in teasing warning. He breathed heavily at the relief, but his cheeks were flushed in embarrassment and he only opened one eye to look up at his interrogator. “You ready to talk yet? Cause I know there’s gotta be a love interest in that mean little head of yours somewhere!”

Bakugou growled up at her through bared teeth, still breathing harder than he wanted to be. “Fuck...you…” He grumbled at his interrogator, clenching his fists in anticipation as he felt those nails just barely start to move again. They moved at an agonizingly slow rate, making him squirm but not yet giggle.

“Maybe we’re not being mean enough. Jirou?” Mina looked up towards the grinning purple-headed girl in front of her, who already knew what she had to do.

“With pleasure, Mina,” Jirou chuckled, extending her earphone jacks down towards Bakugou’s exposed armpits, just barely letting them touch the bare space. Bakugou’s eyes widened in excited fear at the sensation, his body jerking involuntarily.

“NO! Fuck, no, wait!-”

“You wanna talk?” Mina asked, nodding her head at Jirou, alerting the girl to begin moving her jacks in his underarms. She just barely tickled the area teasingly, but he was a puddle of giggles in no time. His teeth were clenched shut and eyes screwed tightly closed, but the high-pitched, breathy giggles that made his chest shake were unmistakable.

He shook his head in answer to her question, before barking with loud laughter as Mina dug into his upper ribs right below where Jirou continued her teasing onslaught of tickles.

“NAHAHAHA! STAHAHAH-” Bakugou cackled, his words getting lost in the mess of laughs and shrieks as the girls continued their torment on his sensitive body.

“Aww, he’s so ticklish! I really didn’t expect this from him to be honest,” Uraraka cooed, using one of her free hands to scribble one nail down his exposed neck on her side. Bakugou let out a surprised squeal, scrunching his head down to shoulders, effectively trapping her finger in the terribly sensitive area.

“GAHAHAHA FUHUHUCK! QUHUHUIT! I SWHEHEAR!” Bakugou screamed with his own aggressive form of pleading, kicking his legs out in playful agony.

“All you have to do is say one little name, Bakugou~” Mina teased, her right hand staying to squeeze at the hypersensitive spot on his ribs, while moving her left to down to vibrate her index fingers into his very lower rib, the exact spot and method he had used on her the night before.

Bakugou lost his mind.

“FUHUHUCK NO PLEHEHEASE! STAHAHAP IHIHIT! GAHAHA SHIT NOT THEHEHERE! NOT THAHAHAT!” Bakugou screamed, bringing his knees up towards Mina’s back in a desperate attempt to curl up, before resorting back to his hysterical kicking like before.

“Tickle tickle, Blasty~” Mina cooed, turning the cackling boy beneath her a bright shade of red.

“Oh, he’s blushing!” Momo awed excitedly, pointing down at the boy’s face.

“NO I’M NOHOHOT!” Bakugou howled, squeaking when the finger Momo used to point began wiggling in his pit along with Jirou’s jack. He threw his head back in mirth, shrieking and cackling at the overwhelmingly ticklish sensations on his body.

“Somebody can’t handle being teased, huh?~” Hagakure pointed out.

“Nope. Poor thing’s gonna break in a minute, I promise you,” Mina spoke as if Bakugou wasn’t even there to listen, which only added fuel to his flustering fire. “So you ready for a break, Explosion Boy?”

“YEHEHES! GOD FUCK PLEHEHEASE!” Bakugou pleaded, gasping for air when all the ticklish sensations stopped at once. Tired, breathy giggles tumbled from his lips, his chest rising and falling in giddy exhaustion. “Fuhucking hell…”

“Crush, Bakugou. C’mon,” Mina crossed her arms, only resulting in Bakugou to roll his eyes.

“Is it that big of a fucking deal?!” Bakugou groaned, jumping with a yelp when he felt a single finger poke his belly button, “FUCK OKAY, OKAY! NO MORE! I’LL FUCKING TALK!”

“Finally,” Jirou muttered, chuckling when she saw Bakugou slightly blush from his spot under them.

“Just...this can’t...this can’t leave this damn room, you got that shitfaces?!” Bakugou’s insult wasn’t laced with his usual fiery aggression, and the girls knew he was serious.

“Bakugou, you would be surprised by the extensive list of secrets that have yet to leave these sleepovers,” Momo placed a non-tickly hand on his shoulder comfortingly, and she could feel the boy deflate relaxingly under her touch.

“Seriously! Nothing leaves this room, Blasty,” Mina gently grabbed Bakugou’s chin, turning his head to face her. His eyes finally met hers, and she nodded. “Nothing.”

Bakugou rolled his eyes, again refusing to make any eye contact with the girls. “Fucking fine...but not because I want to…” he sighed roughly, shutting his eyes tightly before lowering his voice into a whisper that was just audible enough for the girls to hear. “It’s Kirish-”

“YES! I KNEW IT!” Mina threw her hands in the air with an excited screech, making Bakugou jump a little from surprise.

“I kinda thought the same thing, kero. Just wasn’t positive,” Tsu spoke with a finger on her chin before gently climbing off the boy. The other girls followed, and once he was finally free he pushed himself back to his spot against the wall, bringing his knees to his chest to lay his arms on top.

“So fucking stupid...why did you wanna know that shit so bad anyways, huh?!” Bakugou still couldn’t make complete eye contact with any of the girls out of embarrassment.

“Just thought it would be cute!” Mina smiled widely, before turning to face all the girls again. “So, anybody up for Just Dance?”

-

“Aw, really? You’re turning in already?” Mina whined up at Bakugou who was already making his way towards the door.

“Pinky, it’s 1 in the goddamn morning. I’ve already been tickled to death, played Just Dance, painted Kermit’s fucking nails, watched a shitty-ass horror movie, AND told you my who my stupid fucking crush is; I think I’ve got the whole damn sleepover experience,” Bakugou grunted before turning his body back towards the door before pausing his hand on the knob. “Actually, uh...come out here a minute, Horns. Gotta ask you something.”

“Already told you once, Blasty, they aren’t horns!” Mina said as she got up from her spot on the floor and over towards the door with Bakugou. “I’ll be back guys!”

“Alright. Night Bakugou!” Uraraka waved at the pair with a wide smile. All the other girls said their goodnights as well, Bakugou only nodding in response.

The pair made their way into the dark, quiet hallway together, shutting the door behind them. “So what’s up?” Mina asked in a whisper.

Bakugou pinched the bridge of his nose with a sigh. “How...how did you know?”

Mina’s brow quirked. “What?”

“You said you knew I liked him...how?”

Mina couldn’t help but smile. She shrugged. “Pretty obvious, Blasty. He’s the only one you tolerate. I used to think it was just cause you respected him, but when I found you watching that romance last night, it all just kinda made sense,” Mina chuckled, enjoying the slightly embarrassed silence Bakugou gave her in response. That was before Mina gasped suddenly.

“Oh goodness, I completely forgot! I’ll delete it right now, promise!” Mina took out her phone, when Bakugou made a small confused noise.

“Huh? Delete what?” the boy asked.

“The video I took of you. Y’know, the whole reason you came here tonight?” Mina turned her phone around to show Bakugou the clip of him crying at the screen of a romance anime, which made the boy blush in the dark.

“Oh, yeah,” Bakugou huffed. “You, uh...you do that.”

Mina just giggled before deleting the video for good. “Goodnight, Bakugou.”

“Yeah, whatever,” Bakugou rolled his eyes with a small hint of a smile, poking her once in the tummy. “Night.”

Mina watched as Bakugou trekked his way back to his room, and couldn’t help but smile. She knew, without a doubt, that that explosive kid with no friends…was definitely her friend.

-

A / N : thank you for reading, i hope u enjoyed!! sorry it took so long to get out, i’ve been dealing with a lot of stuff in my personal life lol. pls leave a like and pls pls reblog if u can!! <3 xx

[demonlovesangel]

Elucien VS Elriel throughout the books

Brace yourselves because this is going to be a LONG post but I'm going to do it because people seem to disregard Elain's feelings at all times, especially regarding how she reacts around both Lucien and Azriel. So here we go!

And by the way I'm only going to count actual interactions to make it fair, and the most important ones because if not I would be here all day.

Acomaf

Elucien

As Lucien took off his jacket, kneeling before Elain. She cringed away from the coat, from him-

~

But Elain was staring over Nesta's shoulder.

At Lucien- whose face she had finally taken in.

Elriel

Elain said, "It's all very disorienting."

"I can imagine," Azriel said. Cassian flashed him a glare but Azriel's attention was on my sister, a polite bland smile on his face. Her shoulders loosened a bit.

~

Rhys chuckled, Cassian's wrath slipping enough that he grinned, and Elain, noticing Azriel's ease as proof that things weren't indeed about to go badly, offered one of her own as well.

In Acomaf we can see the start of both relationships, but they start with a real difference. Elain and Azriel get along from the very beginning, whereas with Lucien she cringes away because he's one of the reasons she was turned and she doesn't know him, even if she did realize he's her mate.

With Azriel though they talk about his flying, how beautiful it is, she smiles and asks him directly every time. Their interactions come naturally.

Acowar

Elucien

For a long moment, Elain's face did not shift, but those eyes seemed to focus a bit more. "Lucien," she said at last, and he clenched his teacup to keep from shuddering at the sound of his name on her mouth. "From my sister's stories. Her friend."

"Yes."

But Elain blinked slowly. "You were in Hybern."

"Yes." It was all he could say.

"You betrayed us."

He wished she'd shoved him out of the window behind her. "It- it was a mistake."

Her eyes went frank and cold. "I was to be married in a few days."

~

She looked away- towards the windows. "I can hear your heart," she said quietly.

He wasn't sure how to respond, so he said nothing, and drained his tea, even as it burned his mouth.

"When I sleep," she murmured, "I can her your heart beating through the stone." She angled her head, as if the city held some answer. "Can you hear mine?"

He wasn't sure if she truly meant to address him, but he said, "No, lady. I cannot."

Her too-thin shoulders seemed to curve inward. "No one ever does. No one ever looked- not really." A bramble of words. Her voice strained to a whisper. "He did. He saw me. He will not now."

~

Elain sidled toward Nesta, who seemed to be at a near-simmer. "It felt... strange," Elain breathed. "Like you pulled on a thread tied to a rib."

Lucien exposed his palms to her. "I'm sorry."

Elain only stared at him for a long moment. And any lucidity faded as she shook her head...

~

But Elain said nothing. Did not so much as take one step downward.

Lucien inclined his head in a bow the movement hiding the gleam of his eye- the longing and sadness.

And when Lucien turned to signal to Rhys to go... He did not glance back at Elain.

Did not see the half step she took towards the stairs- as if she'd speak to him. Stop him.

~

"I'm fine," Elain said quietly. And then asked, noticing the gore on him, the torn clothes and still-bloody weapons, "Are you-"

"Well, I never want to fight in another battle as long as I live, but... Yes, I'm in one piece."

A faint smile bloomed on Elain's lips.

~

Lucien shrugged. "First- here. To help. Then..." Another glance at Elain. "Who knows?"

I nudged Elain, who blinked at me, then blurted, "You could come to Velaris."

Elriel

Elain peered up at his patient, solemn face.

Azriel smiled faintly. "Would you like me to show you the garden?"

She seemed so small before him, so fragile compared to the scales of his fighting leathers, the breath of his shoulder. The wings peeking over them.

But Elain did not balk from him did not shy away as she nodded- just once.

Azriel, graceful as any courtier, offered her an arm. I couldn't tell if she was looking at his blue Siphon or at his scarred skin beneath as she breathed, "Beautiful."

~

"I can help her," said Azriel, stepping to the table as Elain silently rose. No shadows at his ear, no darkness ringing his finger as he extended a hand.

Nesta monitored him like a hawk but kept silent as Elain took his hand, and out they went.

~

The shadowsinger angled his head.

Lucien murmured to me, eye still fixed on Elain, "Should we- does she need...?"

"She doesn't need anything," Azriel answered without so much as looking at Lucien.

Elain was staring at the spymaster now- unblinkingly.

"We're the ones who need..." Azriel trailed off. "A seer," He said, more to himself than us. "The Cauldron made you a seer."

~

Azriel gently removed the gag from her mouth. "Are you hurt?"

She shook her head, devouring the sight of him as if not quite believing it. "You came for me." The shadowsinger only inclined his head.

~

Yet Elain didn't seem to notice them as she rose up on her toes and kissed the shadowsinger's cheek...

~

Elain weighed my words... And slowly closed her fingers around the blade.

(...)

Elain looked up at Azriel, their eyes meeting, his hand still lingering on the hilt of the blade.

What is funny to me here, is how the relationship between Elain and Lucien seems forced but at the same time they kind of try. She directly says to him he betrayed them, continued to ignore him and eventually she did try to get close (in her own way) but apparently decided against it. And at the end even Feyre has to nudge Elain to say something to Lucien, which she did.

Elain's relationship with Az starts off from him putting her down on the town house's foyer, and her never balking away from him. Like literally never, in all their interactions she takes his arm, his hands, looks at him unblinkingly, and even kisses his cheek. Ends up accepting Truth-Teller too, and locking eyes with Azriel. The sweetest girl is not afraid of the most frightening illyrian male... Considering how Elain is, that says a lot.

You can look at this in many ways, but no one can deny that by this book, Az and Elain have a mutual understanding and chemistry.

Acofas

Elucien

A sidelong glance toward Elain, swift and fleeting. "Both of you."

Elain said nothing, but at least she bowed her head in thanks.

~

My sister rose to her feet. "I should get refreshments."

Lucien rose as well. "No need to trouble yourself. I'm-"

But she was already out of the room.

Elriel

Azriel emerged from the sitting room, a glass of wine in hand and wings tucked back to reveal his fine, yet simple black jacket and pants.

I felt, more than saw, my sister go still as he approached. Her throat bobbed.

(...)

But I strode to my seat- nestled between Amren and Mor- in time to see Elain say to Azriel, "Hello."

(...)

But Azriel only took Elain's heavy dish of potatoes from her hands, his voice soft as night as he said, "Sit. I'll take care of it."

Elain's hands remained in midair, as if the ghost of the dish remained between them...

~

Elain bit her lip and then smiled sheepishly. "It's for the headaches everyone always gives you. Since you rub your temples so often."

Silence again.

Then Azriel tipped his head back and laughed.

(...)

Elain smiled again, ducking her head.

~

Azriel and Elain remained in the sitting room my sister showing him the plans she'd sketched to expand the garden in the back of the town house using the seeds and tools my family had given her tonight.

Honestly, for me, this is by far the most telling book even if it is a novella.

The interaction between Lucien and Elain was so forced. She didn't want to be there, he was kind of uncomfortable too and he even says he can't stand being in the same room as her. Afterwards Elain clearly shows no interest in him and even leaves the room. And Elain says to Feyre that he's not entitled to her affections of attentions, we really need to pay attention to her!

With Azriel though... Wow, their interactions just kept on growing and growing. Elain is clearly affected when she looks at him, her throat bobs, she gets all shy (in a good way), smiles at him too, and even gifts him the headache powder because she was paying attention to him throughout the previous months. That clearly says how much she's been noticing Azriel. Not to mention she explains all her gardening plans and they stay talking after everyone went to bed.

I honestly think it's really cute and that's how a relationship should develop.

Acosf

Elucien

Elain, the wretch, had taken the seat between Feyre and Varian, about as far from Lucien as she could get.

~

He and Lucien did not exchange gifts, though the male had brought a gift for Feyre and one for his mate, who barely thanked him after opening the pearl earrings. Cassian's heart strained at the pain etching deep into Lucien's face as he tried to hide his disappointment and longing. Elain only shrank further into herself, no trace of the newfound boldness to be seen.

Elriel

"I always thought she was born on the wrong side of the wall," Elain admitted. "She made ballrooms into battlefields and plotted like any general. Like you two," she said, nodding to Cassian, and then, a bit more shyly, to Azriel.

Azriel offered her a small smile that Elain quickly looked away from.

~

"I was just checking on dessert," Elain explained as they approached the doorway and Azriel. Nesta met the shadowsinger's stare and he gave her a nod. Then his gaze shifted to Elain, and though it was utterly neutral, something charged went through it. Between them. Elain's breath caught slightly, she gave him a shallow nod of greeting before brushing past, leading Nesta into the room.

By this point it's just painfully obvious. Both Lucien and Elain are uncomfortable with each other even if Lucien still does try (but I still think it's because of the mating bond, not because he likes her). He even says in a previous chapter that he's not always in Velaris to see his mate and looks uncomfortable saying that.

With Azriel we can see something has happened or is happening. Small glances, Elain getting shy but smiling at him, him smiling at her and her looking away? That charged look? Elain's breath caught slightly? There's definitely something going on there and we know what it is from Az's PoV. By that point they have been looking at each other, smiling and brushing hands, not to mention Elain started every single interaction in that PoV. She wanted to kiss him, and gifted him another funny and thoughtful gift yet again because she notices him.

~

I didn't put every single one of the interactions, just the ones that said a lot from Elain's reactions because that's the point of this post, to show how she clearly acts around the two males. And I didn't put the PoV because it's a bonus chapter even when it clarifies Elain's feelings.

With Lucien it's forced, she cringes away, doesn't know what to do, and in the end she's just uncomfortable and clearly doesn't want anything regarding their situation.

With Azriel it started off naturally, they developed a friendship with mutual understanding and respect, and it evolved into something else. The interest in each other was always there. Clearly both of them don't know what to do with this because the feelings are strong and have been there for a long time (at the very least a year because of the last Winter Solstice). From the PoV we know it's not easy, even if both of them like each other (Elain has a mate whether she likes it or not). By this point, because of all the external influences, they can't be together, but I think that's what going to play off in her book, choice.

We need to take into account Elain's reactions and choices. Elain's book is most probably the next one, she's going to be the main character as Feyre and Nesta were. What she wants or needs is what matters, not what everyone else thinks. And from all her scenes we can gather that she's going to fight to make everyone change their mind regarding what she wants to do, who she wants to be.

As you would with a female friend, be supportive of her journey and choices and don't bring her down because it's not what you would have chosen for yourself. Everyone deserves the world, and everyone needs to follow their own path and make their own choices.

[keiarchived]

headcanons of yan!hawks with a big tiddy s/o? 😳👉🏻👈🏻

First he just sees her from afar,,, maybe at work or at a cafe, at first he thinks nothing of her until he catches some dudes eyeing her and her big tiddies, calling her names and being all nasty towards her; yeah that’s when he has a problem, he defends her and thinks of it as ‘hero work’ “it’s okay chick, not all bad people have quirks like villains, gotta protect everyone in any kinda trouble y’know?” 🤪 He later finds himself visiting her work place very often, with the excuse of trying to make sure she’s not being harassed again, but he slowly becomes more and more obsessed with her 👀 he follows her home, even watched her from outside her window and oh boy he finally get a look of those big tiddies she has, he feels kinda dirty thinking about it but now he understands why other dudes check her out so much, she does have a nice rack 👉🏻👈🏻 he ends up jacking off to her from outside her window, it’s not his fault she has such a good body 🤷 it’s all goes down hill from there, he can’t stand her using such revealing clothes, they start dating and he controls all the clothing she uses, no cleavage or tight shirts, only when she’s with him,,, and the people that even dare to look at her funny well,,, there’s been a lot of murders around the city and the bodies are found without eyes.,.., I do wonder who did that 🧐 I rambled again I’m sorry I love your blog 🥺

Seeing people include the pet name I sometime uses for Keigo’s birdie makes me happy 🥺 but also yes 🥺 Hawks to the rescue only to be a creep himself, I love it 💦😌

Also please don’t apologise I love rambles 🥰

yanndere!Hawks x big tiddies!reader

warnings: yandere, cat calling, stalking, controlling, mention of murder

Keigo would’ve definitely blush a little when he first saw you at the coffee shop, he wasn’t expecting to see you and your impressive rack behind the counter rather than the other regular barista he was used to. You must be new.

He would try and make small conversations with you at the beginning whenever he sees you whilst he’s getting coffee

The Hawks you have seen so far have always been kind but oh boy, not today. Not when he saw those customers harassing when he walked in, if only looks could kill

Threatening to take them in with cuffs and practically chased them away

“Don’t ever let me see your faces here again, won’t be so lucky next time.”

They should really consider themselves lucky, if it weren’t for you he would’ve probably have their heads orrrrrrr arrest them if he really have no choice

“You alright chick? They didnt do anything to you did they?”

No, just cat called you and commented on those tits of yours. Needless to say, you hate it. Is this really the only thing men looks at, disappointing really.

But Keigo makes sure you know not all men are like that, well at least not him. Liar 🤥 (Yes I’m calling him out)

At least he actually likes and enjoy your company whenever he come to get his coffee, which have become like 3-4 times a day

“It’s okay chick, gotta protect everyone in any kinda trouble y’know.”

And that just melts your heart, even if it is just hero work

As if visiting 3 times a day every now and then throughout the week wasn’t enough, Keigo became more and more frequent at the shop with the excuse of checking in on you

To make sure no one is harassing you again

Not that you mind, in fact you’re glad to see him more often. Knowing that a hero is here almost at all times makes you feel safe, not to mention you enjoy his company too

Maybe you have develop a crush on him, but Hawks doesn’t need to know that — not now anyway

If only you know he have develop an obsession with you too

Soon, frequent visits became Hawks following you home

Sitting on the edge of some nearby building as he watches you get change and damn is he glad he went through with it

Seeing those perfectly shaped tits, Keigo now understand why those men were crazy enough to make comments on it

All he could think is how they soft they would feel in his hands, taste on his tongue and how good it would feel whilst fucking between them

As expected, Keigo jerks off outside your window for almost a week straight before he decide to break in during the night

Jerking off in the corner of your room, with a panty in hand and god does he just want to fuck you right there right now

But he needs to be patient and play the long game if he wants you to be his and his alone

So when one day Hawks asked you out for a date, you are over joyed. The number two hero asking you out? Is this really happening? The rest was history

The two of you started dating, Keigo have been so so sweet as you would expect

Surprising you with flowers every week, walking you home from and back, frequent dates

But there are the questionable sides too, Keigo begins to voice his opinion on the revealing clothing and tight clothings you own

They can only be wore when you’re with him, alone in the house

That’s understandable right? If the roles were switched, Keigo walking around shirtless or some revealing clothes you’d be jealous too

More often than not Keigo end up giving you some of his sweaters, both because he like seeing you in them and you like how comfy buggy sweaters are despite the two wing holes on the back, Keigo think is kinda sexy tho

Oh and those two men who harassed you before your relationship? Gone.

So did some other who cat called you whilst the two of you are together 😘 maybe not as bad, Keigo just end up putting them in hospital and threatening them, is all good 😌

[franeridart]

Anon said: i love love love LOVE how you just draw gojo leaning onto getou, hiding his face in getou's neck or back or chest <////3 im just so heartbroken over those two

So glad to hear you like him clingy as much as I do!! TT^TT as far as I’m concerned he wasn’t clingy enough in canon, so I’m fixing it as much as I can with every new doodle haha

Anon said: whenever im sad i just come to your account and look through your art :")) it brings me so much comfort :')) also i gotta mention that the teacher getou art you've made has healed my broken heart bc of jjk and now that is the only canon i accept thank you very much gege akutami has nothing on me

GAH GETO-SENSEI MY ONE AND ONLY I’m happy he makes you as soft as he does me, he’s such a comfort to me ;;;; and thank you for liking my stuff!!!! Means the world to me to hear it ;A; <3

Anon said: I miss your krbk sm 😔 No pressure intended!!!!!! I still love and support u and ur art!!!

Man I miss them too!!!!! @ hori when are you bringing my loves back from the war I’m here waiting good sir!!!

Anon said: v v curious on your thoughts on what’s currently going on in bnha manga :)))

HMMM what are my thoughts on it? Well, let’s split it in two: Deku’s side and Todoroki’s side, because that’s how it’s split in my brain atm, and allow me to start from the second because it’s easier to get through for me

I’m in love with everything Hori is doing with Todoroki and everyone involved with him - that’s to say his whole whole family and Hawks and Jeanist too, all of it, I’m so into it it’s no joke at all. Always been in love with how he handles Enji’s character and his interactions with his family and the latest developments didn’t disappoint me at all, wasn’t very much into Dabi right after the “reveal” but the more I think about it and about the story from his pov the more behind it I am, forever and always head over heels for Shouto’s way of dealing with a situation that’s as complex as one would expect from a protagonist of their very own story you could really make a manga out of the Todoroki’s family plot from Shouto’s pov alone, it’s incredible I can’t state how in love with it all I am enough. And Hawks, don’t make me start on him I’ll straight up never stop, absolutely and most definitely my favorite pro-hero I would trust him with my money and my kids 100/10 just assume I’m constantly crying over him. Also Jeanist is just hilarious so bless him and his presence in an otherwise too heavy story

Deku’s side........ well, the main problems I have with it are that one, I don’t really understant the need to keep ofa a secret from the class for the biggest part of the story when the reveal wasn’t forced upon Deku, didn’t have a huge impact on him or his relationship with the others (his leaving wasn’t directly caused by him coming clean after all, he wouldn’t have had to leave earlier had he not kept it a secret and he would have still left at this point had the class already known all along) and didn’t, like. Matter. All that much. Two, this manga is called my hero academia and I’m genuinely starting to wonder why. What was the point of all the arcs set inside the school anyway? Most of the characters growth (Deku’s especially) and the progression of the main plot happened in the arcs outside of the school anyway, and at this point it’s clear we’re not going back to the school after this or even seeing anyone graduate. What of Shinsou? What was the point of his plot when we’re not even gonna see him being active part of the class in a school environment? I’m just confused about it all, I guess. Three, which is really my biggest problem with it all, is the way Deku’s set on saving Shigaraki. It’s not like I don’t like a story in which all the villains are saved and the good guys win and love prevails and all that, call it corny but they’re exactly my type of stories, but I’m not sure I can get behind it when Twice died like that, and Midnight did as well, and Aizawa lost a leg, and Nighteye died, and Hawks might have lost his wings, and Shirakumo ended up Kurogiri and it’s still unclear whether he can be saved, like... why does Shigaraki get to be saved when so many people suffered like that? And it’s not only about them suffering by his hands, it’s about Hori and how he was ruthless with so many characters but lets the story show arbitrary kindness to Shigaraki alone, it’s all... well. Unfair. The way I see it. At this point I at the very least expect kindness for Touya as well, here.

That said if I pick the chapters one by one by themselves I do enjoy them very much. I just don’t gotta think about the big picture lmao AH but it’s all a personal opinion, of course! I know people who enjoy the way the story is going and I can see where they’re coming from, this is all arbitrary tastes and preferences on my part, I’m aware of it!

Anon said: Hi hi! I finally got into jjk AND finally caught up on the manga and i appreciate your doods soooo much more now!! They’re so great!! But imcurious, is there one specific moment in the story where you Gojo and Geto became IT for you? Just genuinely curious!!

THANK YOU happy to hear you liked jjk!!!! And that’s!!! a great question, I’m not sure I have an answer actually? I binged the manga in a day and a half, you see, and when I binge stuff that fast I rarely stop to overthink things - I did ship them as I read too since, well. They’re in love lmao but I shipped them in the same way I shipped itafushi or yuutoge after I read the prequel, you know? Just a general aknowledging of how good they were together. The main point with satosugu specifically was probably that satoru has been my favorite character since the beginning of the story and suguru got there as well as soon as I read their backstory, so once I was caught up they’re the ones I ended up spending the most time thinking about, both by themselves and together, and that ended up making me a bit obsessed..... just a bit lol

If I had to give one specific moment that got me by the heart and squeezed the hardest it’d be... probably Satoru’s “my soul knows otherwise”. And the way his voice alone could bring Suguru back, even for just a single moment. The thing about satosugu for me!!! one of the many things about them, but the main thing for me, is that they love each other. Be it platonic or however you wanna see it, they love each other. Despite everything and after it all, even if Satoru had to kill Suguru, even if Suguru killed so many and betrayed Satoru and they went their separate ways in the harshest of ways, they love each other. It’s insane, isn’t it? That they’d love each other so much they could pass over everything and anything. I’ve seen the “best friends become enemies” trope so often in shounen manga, but this is the first time I see it treated like this - with love so strong that they never blamed each other or turned that love in hate. The way satosugu do it is all-encompassing! It goes beyond the world and their differences and death itself! So if I had to pick it’d be that one, because that scene happens after it’s all over, and it all went to shit and way beyond too already, and still their souls resonate with each other and answer to each other and that sends me insane, just thinking about it. Like, god, they really still love each other. Satoru’s mourned for Suguru for a year, Suguru’s been dead for a year, they’d been separated ten whole years before then, and still! And still!!! It’s so tender I don’t know how to deal with it

Anon said: “What’s a god to a nonbeliever?”—That tag is going to haunt me for a while. The entire tag section for your latest Gojo and Geto drawing is meta-worthy.

THANK YOU it’d been eating at my brain I had to write it down somewhere why are those two like that

Anon said: Do you take commissions? No pressure! ✨❤️

Not right now!

Anon said: How do you feel about sukuna ? like/dislike or thoughts on him

AMAZING QUESTION I love him. I have absolutely zero clue as of why so don’t ask me to elaborate, I’m literally that marge pic with the potato when it’s about Sukuna, I have no meta thoughts about him nor deep reasonings behind it - by all accounts, I should dislike him! But he shows up and I’m like nghhh king, so that’s where we stand. It’s Sukuna, you know. I just think he’s neat.

Anon said: sighs time to get into another fandom bc i simp too hard for ur art 😔

HAH thank you for the trust I hope you’ll like ror if you do get into it!!! hahaha

[haleigh-sloth]

I put together some final thoughts on the past arc, cuz now that it's pretty much over and we can look at the past 20-ish chapters as a whole, I have some.

Apologies in advance cuz this turned out long.

I feel like with the appearance of Stain and Aizawa, the mention of Kurogiri, the callback to Toga, and the end of Dek's solo adventures, it is finally safe to give some final thoughts on the past arc. Specifically talking about the chapters ranging from 306-324.

I want to iterate that I am completely in understanding of the fact that the author is very much overworked, and that if he had been able to take a proper break after the war arc, (or a proper break in general) this past arc would have been better. This is not a jab at the author's abilities, because the man can tell a story. We've seen him do it. He's capable of it, especially when his heart is in it. Which, for the record, I don't think his heart was in this past arc at all--not like it was for the war arc and the very few chapters following up to 305. I think he was forcing these chapters out because he had to. Anyway.

Hardly any progress was made in the plot this past arc. Almost every chapter was boring. Like, we usually get HYPE when spoilers drop! Notice how that hype has completely died down. I will say that chapter 314 lit a bit of a spark in the fandom, but that spark died immediately when we got the three completely useless explosions (All Might's car, Nagant, the mansion in the forest), and when we kept seeing Endeavor and Hawks--two characters in desperate, desperate need of some serious development--remain completely stagnant and hollow.

Yes, some moments were worth being excited about! Toga came to Ochacko's mind, Midoriya has thought of Shigaraki several times--as well as thought back to specific lines from his (very important) speech--Shouto went off on his dad in front of UA, and Bakugo and Midoriya finally had a moment of clarity and unification. Those things were all nice. But beyond that....

I think my biggest issue is how Hawks is being handled right now. Other bloggers have said it before, but Hawks feels really retconned and it seems like Hori is backing out on kicking Hawks's ass in-story. Twice's death feels as if it didn't even happen. Which, I'm still holding out hope that that is going to change at some point down the line. BUT--the fact of the matter is that the writing has reduced Hawks to this extremely flat, 2-D character who only is constantly accompanied by/associated with Endeavor and cannot seem to exist in-story otherwise, not thinking a single thought about the fact that Endeavor is a grim reminder of his abusive past, not struggling or regretting even a little bit about the fact that he murdered someone who was running away crying, and suddenly has all these optimistic lines that really don't belong with his character. So after waiting all this time for his character to have the same substance he used to during the war arc and before, it's going to feel extremely jarring for him to suddenly be as important as he potentially could have been to the end game, and suddenly go back to being as complex and intriguing as he used to be out of fucking nowhere. I mean I'm holding out hope still, because Twice deserves better. And Hawks being made into a flat Endeavor worshipper is pretty cringe. There is still time for change though 🙏🏼, for now. Hawks is on thin ass ice.

Endeavor....ugh. Stagnant, plot-wise. But his character is fine, for now. His arc is pretty straight forward, but there's concern it'll just be....lightly painted over with a completely uncalled-for layer of optimism. Like, it's already optimistic and hopeful that his family is going to be together in the end. Nothing story-wise has changed that ending to come. If anything, because of the ridiculous happy-go-lucky last few chapters (sans 325-326), I'd say it's even more solidified. The question at this point is how dark and serious will it get on the journey to that ending. Will there be any stakes, any losses, etc. Endeavor should not get to remain a hero in the end. He shouldn't, and as of now I still think he's gonna lose his hero status in the end. But....heroes and civilians alike do not seem to give a single shit that he abused his family. They only yell at him because of what Touya did. Not because of what he did to his family as a whole, or the fact that he's still considered a fucking hero in the eyes of society. It's very...disappointing, and raises the possibility that nothing will actually be addressed with him and he'll still be a "hero". Nothing has called him out, except for Shouto! But Shouto has hardly had ANY screen time in so long, that it doesn't feel as heavy watching him (rightfully) bitch out his dad. That's another issue that would result in a way longer post than this already is, but Shouto needs his arc back. He still hasn't gotten it back, still. Yes, the kids are back on screen, but it's obvious which kids are gonna be saving some villains, so it'd be nice to put some focus on them and their inner struggles and their arcs, instead of pandering to everyone ELSE pointlessly if they're not going to carry the plot further (Endeavor and Hawks I'm looking at you).

Other smaller complaints:

I can't get over how there were three chapters dedicated to Ochacko and that megaphone. We got Toga out of it, but at what cost..

The villains were established to be central to the remainder of the main kids' arcs, but hardly any mention of them at all. It felt to me like the plot was literally dancing around that topic. Just trying to put it off for as long as possible.

I don't really have complaints about 325 and 326. They could have been better if everything leading up to them was...worth getting excited over, but ultimately they're okay. They at least gave us mystery (Stain and All Might) and suspense (Aizawa and Kurogiri) to look forward to. I hope Hori can enjoy himself more in the remaining parts of the story. It seems like when the happenings in the story are actually interesting, the story-telling is significantly better and the author seems to have more of a solid idea of where he's going.

He deserves a break too.

He has talent, I want to see that talent carry out the story to its end!

Anyway, here's to better chapters to come 🍻 🍻 🍻

[unfortunatelysirius]

Wicked Charm, What’s Your Patronus? | Remus Lupin, Marauders Era

「 ❁ 」PROMPT 「 ❁ 」

One day in Defense, Professor Boomstick offers whoever can produce a corporeal Patronus an Outstanding on the next essay as well as an out on a test. When Y/N shockingly produces a wolf Patronus, well… you can assume the rest.

「 ❁ 」AUTHOR’S NOTE 「 ❁ 」

Why did I name a guy Boomstick? Because that word is fucking hilarious to me THAT’S WHY (also this sucks ass but tbh I'm just going with the flow nowadays whatever comes out comes the f out whether it’s shit or not) and for anyone who wants to get technical, believe me i already know what u will say

      DEFENSE WAS Y/N L/N’S last class of every Friday and as of late, the only class she fervently dreaded. It was a mix of students from different Houses but dominated by Gryffindors. Three of the infamous sixth-year Gryffindor circle, James Potter, Sirius Black, and Remus Lupin, were in there, each of the blokes gifted with a wand. Y/N didn’t pay them much mind at the start of the year but after a few months of mingling and getting to know her classmates, she had developed somewhat of an acquaintanceship with the boys, perhaps even a friendship. She was one of the other few Gryffindors in the room and after she particularly chewed out one of the Ravenclaws feet from the classroom for ruining her perfect attendance record (allegedly, the clumsy arse caused her a three-day sentence in the Hospital Wing) James and Sirius decided she had enough style and substance (“Marauder flair,” they called it) to invite her into their gang.

      It was as unenticing on the inside as it was from a feet-on-the-ground outsider’s perspective. Y/N wasn’t very adventurous. She was miles away from Lily’s singlehanded definition of “studious”, but still a pretty mellow person, preferring to keep to predetermined routes and undetected on radars. She was an extrovert with introverted tendencies, mostly appearing at times with people who differed in lifestyle. Like James and Sirius, two peas in a pod.

      Remus Lupin was much less of a firecracker inches from popping, his voice tampered and quiet, his disposition ripe with premature wisdom. Y/N found him likeable. Almost too likable—a noticeable kind of fancy that only prats would fail to see. Then that fancy became more; she didn’t remember how.

      This was open to judgment from the gods, who could choose to interfere or leave Y/N’s recent change of heart alone.

      Unfortunately for her with this newfound friendship and growing fancy, James and Sirius had enough arrogance to fit the Greek gods from ancient myth…

      Zeus and Poseidon, at least. Maybe even Aphrodite, the bloody matchmakers. 

-

      Professor Boomstick, a stout, ashen man who oftentimes went into tangents about how the Muggle Army was a lousy old group of incompetent twats, liked challenges. He liked challenges for his students, specifically. He also liked favoritism and had yet to liken any students to his old pub buddies. Today Y/N and the Marauders all went to class expecting a test, but Professor Boomstick was already there waiting—and the room was empty of desks. Y/N stopped in her tracks, feeling Remus’s tall, lean frame smack into her backside. He apologized but she ignored him, sweeping her gaze across the floor. A group of students who found themselves there before her were huddling in a corner, nervous as sheep waiting to be sheered.  

      Y/N’s steps held an edge... She couldn’t deny she herself was nervous.

“Damn the test,” Professor Boomstick barked suddenly, catching Y/N’s bewildered eyes and holding them hostage. She swallowed hard. Surprises were not fun to her; she hated them with a passion. This old fart was just an arse to be incorporating one in place of a test on the history of Patronuses and Animagi she spent eons studying for. “We’ll see what you’re made of today without wasting parchment, can’t read your writin’ anyhow.”

      “What exactly are we doing?” a long-faced, petite-nosed girl asked.

      Professor Boomstick raised his wand and closed the door behind Y/N and the Marauders, throwing them further into the room. Y/N felt Remus’s arm brush her side and heat enveloped her from head to stomach.  Glaring at Professor Boomstick, they all walked to stand with the other students, keeping a close eye on the crazy man they all called their teacher. Thank Merlin Defense professors never lasted.  

      “For any of you kids that can produce me a corporeal Patronus, I won’t just give ye bonus,” Professor Boomstick said, smirking at the huddle of students. “Ya got an essay due two weeks time on endangered species of the Wizarding World and that test we had scheduled today’s rescheduled for Monday. I’ll give any of ya who give me what I want a freebie on the quiz—and an automatic Outstanding on the essay. Still gotta turn three pages in though.”

      The huddle of students struck up an excited exchange of whispers before going abruptly silent. Patronuses? That was hard-level shit and sparingly learned outside of class lessons due to its difficulty. Disappointment shuttered down the spines of each student, one at a time, as they all came to the same conclusion: this was a waste of time.

      “What? None of ya have even tried?” Professor Boomstick demanded, bushy white eyebrows furrowing in the middle of his forehead. “May be a charm, but it could save yer life someday. All it takes is one loose Dementor and BOOM! Your soul’s been sucked right outta ya.”

      Everyone flinched, some horrified at the sheer mention of Dementors. Professor Boomstick was right. No one really knew Patronuses and their uses. Advanced magic like that was too extensive, too dueling of a task.

      Professor Boomstick was getting frustrated and impatient, glaring at each student individually. Crazy old man.

Y/N L/N nervously glanced at her classmates, mostly the marauding group of boys she befriended, before she stepped out of the huddle. All eyes automatically went to her.

      James and Sirius were (in their opinion, rightfully) shocked she had this information under her belt the entire time—sitting on it, dwelling on it, never admitting to it where her friends were concerned. The two of them didn’t have any concept of privacy, both too invasive to be capable of secrets; Remus was nowhere near similar. Secrets were a part of his nature, only for the benefit of others and never his. If anyone could understand Y/N’s need to keep something like this close to her chest, it was Remus. Though, this wasn’t much of a secret. They all knew Y/N’s history and domestic life.

      Remus glanced at her, an unreadable expression on his face, but her back was turned to him. She could feel everyone looking at her and picking out a single pair of eyes was too strenuous a task.

      “Get on with it, L/N,” Professor Boomstick demanded.

      “Okay, sir,” Y/N said. She would have never dared do this, but she was drowning in coursework from her other classes—any further work and she’d lose sleep, her grades suffering for it. Her mouth opened, inhaling a deep breath she braced.

      Patronus charms were a complicated, beautiful species of magic. Arduous and dogging, it took someone particularly skilled to produce one—and you had to conjure one of your best memories, one of pure joy and exhilaration. Not just happiness, as one of Y/N’s old mentors incorrectly told her once upon a time. Y/N came from a family always preparing for the worst and through the years as the likelihood of a war reached its peak, her parents grew increasingly paranoid and enrolled her in a summer mentorship program as a precaution. She learned the Patronus charm from an eccentric man named Ellis Hawking.

      Y/N’s happiest memory, the one that gave her pure, unadulterated joy, was when she was twelve and got to see her new baby sister.

      “Expecto Patronum,” Y/N said when an incandescent smile reached her lips. All concentration went into her wand when she pointed. Her wand felt like it thrummed under her fingertips and she targeted the air just north of herself, where no one was in her line of sight.

      Everyone behind her gasped when a shot of pure light emitted from her wand’s end, something growing larger as it left. Tendrils of silver and white swept the floor, coiling to become a translucent shape. The shape growled noiselessly, galloping on the ground like a wolf. It was a wolf. Majestic and sleek, making a turn to come running back at the caster herself—polarizing white eyes staring right into hers. Ears pinned back and slivers of silver hair standing on edge. All until it disappeared into the same device that made it. Creation and destruction, two separate words that meant the same: an inevitable, unavoidable cycle.  

      Y/N’s Patronus was last a dolphin when she first learned how to cast, not a wolf.

      Her Patronus had changed.

      “Bravo, bloody Hell—bravo, girl!” Professor Boomstick clapped enthusiastically. “For sure you’re gettin’ in my good graces rest of this here year. You’ve gotta be one hell of a witch casting a corporeal Patronus at sixteen! Bloody—”

      Y/N stared down at her wand, completely bewildered.

      Why did it change?

-

      James glanced over at Sirius while Y/N was distracted, a grin breaking his shocked composure. Neither he, Sirius, or Remus expected that; while Remus was busy frozen and possibly panicking himself into early gray hairs, James was bursting on the inside from excitement. Sirius shared a similar expression.

      “Looks like little Y/N’s in love with Moony,” he hissed under his breath, failing to lose his grin. “That’s gotta be it. I’ve read on this before.”

      Sirius nodded, a faux solemnness combatting the electric shock darting around like butterflies on his face. “After General Prat’s done,” he said, and the two nodded like soldiers heading to war.

-

      When no one other than Y/N could even produce an incorporeal Patronus, Professor Boomstick disappointedly released them—promising a nervous Y/N not to worry about the test or upcoming essay. James and Sirius automatically attacked at the last nameless student’s retreat, Remus trailing his two mates like a left-behind dog.

      Sirius’s eyes zeroed in on Y/N’s wrist, where a charm bracelet dangled. It was covered in expensive-looking charms, one of engraved letters, a wand, a little wolf.

Whoa, cauldron’s bearings. There was a bloody wolf charm! What were the odds?

      “Wicked charm,” Sirius said through a wink. Y/N’s eyes flickered between the two blokes then at her charm bracelet, not at all soothed in their presence. Still struggling to understand why her Patronus would be different, the two twats harassing her wasn’t desirable—especially since they looked like they did while meddling. Pranking. Causing mischief. Y/N made it clear ages ago she wouldn’t react kindly if they decided to fuck around with her the way they did with the rest of the Hogwarts student body. She liked her comfort bubble how it was, unperforated by buffoons best left six feet away. “Wolves. Did you get it to match your Patronus?”

      Y/N bit her lip. “Well, actually—"

      “Ah, Padfoot, obviously that wouldn’t be the case,” James said, slinging an arm around his mate’s shoulder. “She got it because it makes her think of a certain someone.”

      “Who would I even think of? You guys are such prats,” Y/N said indignantly, narrowing her eyes now. Seriously, what were they getting at? They didn’t know anything, just perfectly well how drive anyone and everyone up the bloody wall. They’d drive a sane man mad!

      “James, Sirius, don’t,” Remus said softly, appearing from behind. His eyes were wide with alarm, meeting Y/N’s at her sharp twist. He gulped at the annoyance in hers; James and Sirius had already done their damage. Idiots, they were.

      “See, Y/N, I don’t think your Patronus has always been a wolf,” Sirius went on, pretending like neither Y/N nor Remus spoke in the first place. “Am I wrong?”

      Y/N warily said, “No…”

      “Did you know Patronuses can change to be complementary of their lovers’?” Sirius grinned obnoxiously. He shrugged his shoulders and nudged Y/N with one of his hands. “Just a thought. Maybe you fancy somebody, love ‘em.”

      Y/N’s eyes widened and involuntarily, they looked at where Remus was standing. Remus froze again.

      “We’ll leave you to it,” James said hastily, still grinning.

      The bespectacled boy quickly lassoed Sirius around the neck and guided him to the door, calling to Remus that they’d be back in their dorm by the time he finished.

      Remus awkwardly glanced over at Professor Boomstick. The man was just standing by his desk, drinking out of a flask, presumably waiting for his next class. Y/N sighed and unconsciously laced her fingers into Remus’s, dragging him away from their crazy-ass professor.

      Once outside, Y/N faced Remus. “Is your Patronus a wolf?” she asked quietly, hurriedly. She didn’t want anyone to overhear, though the only likely soul left in distance was Peeves.

      Remus looked at the ground. “Yes,” he reluctantly told her. He and the Marauders had yet to let her in on his furry little secret.

      “Oh,” Y/N said and went silent. It’s not that she didn’t want to be in love with Remus, she just didn’t understand why she could have been so stupid to cast her Patronus in front of the entire class without contemplating her feelings for Remus first. Especially with prior knowledge that a wolf Patronus implied the chance of the charm caster being a werewolf. Students from the class would be beside themselves with rumors of Y/N being a werewolf herself.

      As long as it wasn’t Remus being investigated.

      “I’m sorry,” he said quietly, peeking up at her.

      Y/N rolled her eyes. “Remus, why are you apologizing? Because of what animal the charm was? I’m not a bloody idiot. I know. Good thing I’m the caster, no one else, right?”

      “Why would you like me, let alone love me?” Remus asked. “I don’t understand. I’m—”

      “No, don’t even say it,” Y/N said, meeting his gaze. She reached forward and held his shoulders. “You’re handsome, funny, and intelligent. The least mad of any bloke I’ve seen. That’s all that matters to me.”

      The heels of her feet lifted off the ground so she could peck his cheek. Remus flushed red and flinched back, not having expected any sort of affection—but Y/N deliberately ignored his confusion. She snorted and turned to leave.

      Remus stood processing the unlikely events.

Y/N didn’t hear corresponding footsteps and stopped walking herself. “I hope you at least somewhat like me,” she said over her shoulder. “Else, that’d be one bloody embarrassing confession.”

Oh.

Remus’s shoes squeaked when he jogged to catch up. With his cheeks still aflame, Y/N hoped that meant he did, in fact, reciprocate.

I might need to do something about everyone seeing my Patronus, Y/N thought. Stupid Hogwarts and its plethora of assholes waiting for worthy gossip.

She was sure James and Sirius wouldn’t mind Obliviating the entire school for her and Remus. The idiots did supposedly do anything for their friends. 

[pigeocore]

I have no one to talk to so here are my Thoughts on the newest Warrior Cats Books (MAJOR SPOILERS FOR A WARRIOR'S CHOICE AND THE PLACE OF NO STARS)

Out of everything that could've happened in this series I did not expect Snowtuft to be relevent again, but I'm glad he is because I like his development through the book and hope the team won't fuck it up

I'm very sad at the lack of Spotfur in this book but the one scene we got of her was amazing so I'll give it a pass

I was really angry with Mothwing when Darkness Within came out, but now I feel like she has made up for her faults and genuinely wants to help Shadowsight

Despite the fact that I liked this book overall I am really disappointed that Bramblestar is still alive. Let the man die and give us Squirrelstar and deputy Spotfur or Bristlefrost please

Also if by the end of this or the next arc cross clan relationships won't become legal I will scream

Moving on onto the novelas, Daisy's Kin was kinda boring but had it's moments. I'm sure people who like Daisy more than me love this book

The moments where Daisy fights a hawk and turns Smokey down are LEGENDARY

Also I hate that we get a slight sneak peek at Spotfur's kits in this book but we don't actually see them or their mother, I hope they're just saving the drama for the next book

Spotfur's rebellion was also kinda boring but it has Spotfur in it so I can forgive that

I really liked the ending and the beginning but everything in between was just kinda meh, mostly stuff we already knew

The ending makes it seem like Spotfur is being set up as the next deputy and damn I wish, but I know this isn't gonna happend knowing Erins

Blackfoot's reckoning on the other hand was AMAZING and it lived up to almost all my expectations

One of my top wishes for this novella was to show Blackstar's family and his relation to Bagerfang and they did, I couldn't be happier

Seeing Blackstar slowly realize his faults and acknowledge that the cats he hurt in the past don't have to forgive him slaps

Literally if you are planning on reading the Warrior's choice but don't have time just read Blackstar's Reckoning because it's a must

Feel free to discuss these books with me because I have a lot to say

[thisbassslaps]

My Favorite Video Games

Here are five of my favorite video games that have been influential forms of entertainment and deserve some commemorative attention.

5. Tony Hawk's Underground - (2003)

Developed by Neversoft

I was a huge fan of the Tony Hawk's series. I picked up every game from THPS1 (1999) to Proving Ground (2007), before they began to use motion control. The gameplay is a lot of fun.... Hitting left-down->bb for a Gamecube 360 flip is very satisfying. I really enjoyed THUG 1 because it was the first game in the series to have a fully developed story. I was a New Jersey skater, looking to make it into skate industry and rip around the world. I remember the dialogue and story very well, and I constantly replayed it on higher difficulties, adding different pros to my "skate video". This is the only Tony Hawk game where I completed all of the gap locations. I also enjoyed re-creating Boarderline Skatepark in the Create-A-Park editor. It was cool to virtually skate my local park. I am disappointed that I deleted the park file from my memory card...

4. The Legend of Zelda: Majora's Mask 3D - (2015)

Developed by Grezzo

The Nintendo 3DS is my favorite console, specifically the New Nintendo 3DS XL. It is comfortable, sleek and has an enjoyable catalog of modern and old games. A Link Between Worlds was my introduction to the Zelda franchise. I eventually got around to Majora's Mask 3D and I instantly fell in love with the art style. The purples and pinks looked great and the level design was stellar. I loved playing MM3D during the Halloween season. For me, it fit the crisp Fall mood in a meaningful way. It's somber, lonely, spooky, uneasy (those creepy mask transfigurations...). I enjoyed running into the scarecrow at the Astral Observatory, as well as exploring the Ikana Graveyard at dusk. In typical Zelda fashion, the music by Koji Kondo is great (I love the Goron Village theme). As a side note, I had a wonderful time playing through Ocarina of Time 3D. That game is fantastic and very memorable... but I think that I enjoy MM a little more because of the spooky aesthetic, the main plot and the finely-tuned side missions.

3. EarthBound - (1994)

Developed by Ape Inc. and HAL Laboratory

Earthbound is another game that I logged a hearty amount of hours into. I was gaining interest in a few classics from the Nintendo eShop (Pokémon Yellow, A Link to the Past, Donkey Kong Country 2, Castlevania 3). Earthbound's cult status and quirky suburban setting greatly captured my attention. During a summer after college, I would enjoy the early mornings with a fresh cup of black coffee and Earthbound. The glitchy, psychedelic, 16-bit battle sequences paired nicely with the caffeine buzz...the catchy musical themes and the computer chip-like sound effects were just as addicting as the La Colombe coffee! I loved the dialogue, story, characters, levels....everything about this game was incredibly charming, witty, challenging and fun. The grinding in this game was enjoyable and the rolling hitpoints mechanic built up a lot of suspense during the more difficult battles. In homage to my favorite TV show, I changed the characters' names to familiar Twin Peaks names (Coop, Laura, Jcoby, Hawk). I was happy to have all of my characters above level 90 and to obtain the 1/128 Sword of Kings for Hawk/Poo. My favorite ending in a video game comes from Earthbound. The final chain of events are psychologically demanding and truly unforgettable.

2. Deadly Premonition: The Director's Cut - (2013)

Developed by ToyBox Inc.

I really, really love this game. Deadly Premonition is about as close as I can get to playing a Twin Peaks video game. The Lynchian mood was noticeable throughout my entire playthrough and the clunky gameplay/poorly rendered graphics/subpar sound mixing makes me love the game even more. In the game, you play as Agent Francis York Morgan, who is attempting to solve the murder of Anna Graham in Greenvale, Washington. Deadly Premonition is a bizarre murder mystery, filled with highly developed townsfolk, quirky city police officers, a breathtaking Pacific Northwest setting, terrifying ghouls and the infamous Raincoat Killer. There were a number of instances where the Twin Peaks influence was delightfully apparent. Some examples include the design of the Greenvale Sheriff's Department, A & G Diner, The Pot Lady, the picture of Velvet Falls in York's hotel room. I enjoyed coming across these easter eggs and loved exploring all areas and aspects of the game. I genuinely enjoyed spending time at the hotel, conversing with Polly (the owner of the Great Deer Yard Hotel) and having a cup of coffee (with milk, no sugar). The deeply thoughtful plot, the memorable soundtrack (that "Whistle Theme" and those screeching saxophones..ahh!!) and the open world exploration provided the perfect atmosphere for me to become captivated by the game. Unfortunately, I did not do all of the side missions, as I opted for the endgame cutscene. Maybe one day I will hook up my PS3 and attempt to complete all of the content that I missed (isn't that right, Zach?).

1. Donkey Kong 64 - (1999)

Developed by Rare

On Christmas of 1999, I received a Nintendo 64 and Donkey Kong 64. The N64 was my first home video game console and I was ecstatic. I hooked it up to my older sister's television, popped in the brand new, yellow cartridge and was immediately in awe of what I was seeing. The D.K. Rap was (and still is) amazing and the title screen had me more than ready to play. I specifically remember being enchanted by the sweeping cinematic for the Jungle Japes level. The game blew my mind. I played it nearly every summer from 3rd grade up until 12th grade and explored every single nook and cranny. I collected and completed everything for a 101% game completion status! Grant Kirkhope's soundtrack is truly the best, the sound effects are extremely nostalgic, the characters' personalities are super expressive, the 3D level design is engrossing and the comedic tone of the game had me entertained for hours and hours. I loved this game so much. As a teenager, I wrote my own version of a DK Rap, which included five different dogs that were a part of my close family. What makes this game so special to me is the fact that I had a few friends and family members who also loved the game. Having a camaraderie that surrounded the game made it more enjoyable for me to beat a boss, complete challenging mini-games, watch cutscenes and stumble upon something hilarious. Donkey Kong 64 is an absolute gem and it will always be favorite.

[havethetimeofyourstyles]

Chapter Four.

a/n: this was one of my fav chapters to write, so hope you all enjoy! I think you’re all gonna like this one hehe :’) pls reblog to share and leave feedback as it continues to motivate me <3

SERIES MASTERLIST | word count: 10.1k

come talk to me about WTSGD! i’d love to know your thoughts!

October 31, 2017 

A lot had happened in the last five months that felt like an eternity. 

After Luci’s very first performance for Miss Saigon and her unfortunate breakdown that was caused by one of the biggest critics of Broadway, practically insulting her, she performed almost every night after that. 

When one bad review on her performance was ratified by hundreds of tweets and reviews, saying that Luci’s performance was one of the best they’d ever seen, she’d say she did her damn job. The night of her breakdown, she received a text from Nina, who sent her a link to a few reviews on her Broadway debut. Those articles directly addressed how unprofessional and poorly written Adam West’s review was, and that he needed to open his eyes to observe and admire brilliant, wonderful, and beautifully performed talent. On top of the important names next to Adam West, theatre-Twitter seemed to agree with the positive articles that were written about her, tweeting that Luci was the next face of Broadway; and who cared if she started her career in commercials and Off-Broadway because getting the role in Miss Saigon had proved that she worked her way up and that she was good. 

After reading the articles and tweets, her mood had drastically shifted. She was so overwhelmed by the positive comments that defended her from a misogynistic man that she cried again, but it was tears of happiness this time around. She walked out of her apartment, headed to Harry’s door to show him the uplifting reviews, and he was happy to see that she was ecstatic—he was happy for her. 

They had definitely become closer since that day. 

Harry and Luci hung out a lot. Whenever they had the chance and they both weren’t busy, they would knock on each other’s doors or text one another, asking to hang out. For the most part, he opened up to her, showcasing his true personality and becoming more comfortable around Luci—enough to joke around and be himself. He loved the way he didn’t feel like he had to be someone he’s not; everything felt true and real. 

It was refreshing for Harry to have a real friend, a best friend, other than Jeff and Mitch. Although he developed a small crush on said friend, it was nice to just have a chat and walk around the neighborhood with her. He’d been talking himself up to ask her out, not knowing if she’ll say yes or if she even feels that way about him; but from what he could tell, he thinks that she’s sort of infatuated with him. Luci would flirt with him from time to time, and would tell him that he’s adorable and sweet, making Harry’s cheeks redden from the sweet talk. 

Luci’s situation with Daisy and Samuel never got better. Ever since she started to perform more and more—sometimes even more than Daisy—they would be nothing but rude to her. They weren’t used to someone taking their spotlight; it was like someone stepping right in front of them on center stage to steal the show—especially if it was someone they despised and was new to Broadway. The two tried to take it up with Tal, demanding and arguing about how they deserved to perform every single night, but Tal kept her word to Luci and the rest of the industry: that she would stand up for her cast and run the show herself. 

Throughout the months, Luci had been talking with Harry about something very, very important. It was a few weeks ago, during their walk to a bagel place in the morning, when she first brought it up. 

“Remember that lady who came up to me after the show?” She asked as they walked along the sidewalk. Harry nodded, letting out a ‘mhm.’ “So, she’s a talent agent…” Harry raised his brows, thinking she was an agent for Broadway. “In Hollywood.” Samantha Stone was one of Hollywood’s greatest and biggest agents; she mostly worked with actors who were first starting out in the industry before making them successful. Samantha was always on the hunt for new and fresh talent; she walked the streets with an eye like a hawk. 

In early September, Samantha was in New York for a small getaway, as well as to meet one of her side pieces in the city. She figured she could watch a show or two since she was already in the city, and it’d been ages since she'd seen a Broadway show. Deciding on Miss Saigon because she saw the tweets and reviews of Luciana, she decided to give it a shot and see what her hype was about. And it did not disappoint. She was so intrigued and invested in the story, and was absolutely blown away by Luciana’s performance. Naturally, even though she shouldn’t be working, she waited until the cast was coming out of the theatre to approach her. 

Luci was in complete shock because she’d never had anyone walk up to her, telling her to give her a call because she was a talent agent and hoped to work with her soon. When Luci got back home, she looked up Samantha Stone and her breath hitched as she found out who she had worked with and what she did for a living. 

“Holy shit!” Harry completely stopped walking, making Luci stop as well. They stood on the side of the sidewalk as people passed by them. Harry beamed excitedly, but soon his smile softened, noticing Luci’s didn’t match his. “What’s the matter? Why aren’t you excited?” 

“I-I don’t know. I just get nervous thinking about it, like she wants to work with me.” Luci fiddled with her fingers. 

“Isn’t that great?” Harry asked softly; he didn’t see what was wrong with that, but he was being patient with Luci to try and understand what she was feeling and thinking about.

She nodded. “It is. I’m just nervous; I hate disappointing people. What if I call her and I do an audition or whatever, and she realizes that I’m not meant for the job? She’s the biggest agent in Hollywood, Harry. That would mean I’m not meant for any job,” she explained worriedly, anxiety bubbling up in her stomach as if it’d been simmering for hours on the stove.

Harry slightly frowned. He couldn’t imagine how it must feel to doubt one’s own talents, and he absolutely hated that Luci was doing it. 

“Luciana, listen to me.” Well, that definitely caught her attention. “You’re remarkably talented, end of. If you end up being dropped by that agent, then fuck her. She shouldn’t be a talent agent if she can’t see clear talent right in front of her. Literally everyone in the same room knows you are so incredibly gifted. Plus, wouldn’t you like to try it out? It doesn’t hurt to try because you have nothing to lose. You’ll still be on Broadway; and then you’ll try again later if right now is not your time.” 

Smiling, she appreciated his words. She nodded, knowing he was completely right. “Okay, I’ll give it a shot.” Her response seemed to satisfy Harry. “Thank you.” 

“Of course. I’ll always be here for you.” She smiled. “Still gonna help me grade papers?” 

She chuckled as they started walking on the pavement again. “Yup. Believe it or not, it’s actually fun grading papers.” 

He turned to her shockingly. “Oh, really? Then maybe you could be my TA and I’ll have you grade all the papers.” Luci laughed, saying that she didn’t mind; she adored moments when they were playful. Their friendship was refreshing to the both of them. 

A week after her conversation with Harry, where he reassured and encouraged her, she called Samantha, who was delighted to hear from Luci. Samantha asked if she wanted to meet for lunch; Luci was hesitant, but she remembered Harry’s words, and it really didn’t hurt to try, so she agreed and they met in Midtown at a Thai restaurant. 

It was a casual luncheon where Samantha got to know Luci before she decided if she wanted to sign her or not. Luci completely rocked her socks; she was funny, kind, and very humble—traits that not a lot of stars had. So, Samantha immediately thought she was perfect and very likeable. After thirty minutes of eating and chatting, Samantha pulled out her business side, along with a contract, and discussed what this could mean for Luci. She went over her contract very quickly, and Luci knew she couldn’t keep up so she pretended to listen, nodding and letting out a ‘mhm’ to be interactive. 

Samantha had a pen ready for her to sign, but if Luci knew anything, it was to not sign contracts right then and there, and to go over the contract in further details on her own. So, Luci told her that she would look over the stack of papers once more before she got back to her potential agent. 

Luci wished she took a business class to understand such things about contracts and how to handle things herself, but she thinks that she might enroll in some classes some time soon. She attended Boston University and graduated with a Bachelor’s degree in Performing Arts in Theatre Arts. On top of auditioning, solo acts, musical pieces, and countless shows for the four years she was there, she maintained a 3.5 GPA in her general education, and that’s something she’s incredibly proud of herself for. There were a few classes during her freshman year that she failed, making her consider dropping out, but she picked herself back up and promised herself to work harder, and she did. 

When she got back home, she tossed the contract on her coffee table as she sighed, grabbing a glass of water. She had felt stressed out about the situation, but then she remembered that Harry’s sister, Gemma, was a lawyer in London. So, she sent Harry a quick text, telling him about her situation, and asked if Gemma was able to help out. Harry was on his lunch when she texted, but he quickly asked Gemma and she was quick to comply, anything to help her brother’s friend.

The day after, Harry and Luci both sat down on his couch, FaceTiming Gemma on his laptop; it was the very first time his sister and Luci were meeting each other. Harry warned Luci that Gemma was a bit tough with his new friends, but once the two women chatted for a few minutes, Gemma was smittened with her; Harry was shocked at how quick they seemed to become friends, but he cherished it because he liked Luci…a lot. 

Luci had sent over a scanned version of the contract, so they went over it together with Harry sitting next to her for moral support; and from what Gemma said, the contract was clean. The most important thing that Gemma was looking for was that Luci had a say to back out of the contract, and it stated that clearly. Gemma told her that she could sign the contract if she wanted, and that eased Luci’s anxieties, making her thank Gemma almost a million times for her help. 

The next day, Luci met up with Samantha for brunch with the signed contract in her hand. Samantha was delighted to see that it was inked with her signature; she told Luci that this won’t be the only thing she was going to sign because so many people are going to want her autograph. That made Luci smile, giggling a tad bit at the thought of it. 

By the beginning of October, Samantha called Luci and informed her that she was booked for an audition for a supporting character in Ocean’s Eight that was to be released late next year. Luci was surprised at how quickly Samantha was able to get her an audition, but they didn’t call her the best for nothing. 

With only two weeks to prepare, Luci put her time and effort into rehearsing the few pages of the script Samantha had sent her. Luci didn’t have a talent coach whatsoever, so she tried her best to see every aspect of her acting, jotting down notes on the margins so she could further better herself. She was hiding her stress and nerves quite well as she tried not to freak out about how insane this opportunity was to even audition. 

When her audition was only two days away, she called Ren for the traditional pep-talk that inspired and motivated her to do better and to try her best because that was all that she could do. She wished that her family was physically next to her so she could feel the comfort and warmth that they provide because after all, they are home and always will be. 

Luckily, some producers were in New York holding auditions, so she didn’t have to fly to California for a day or two. She’d never felt more intimidated and nervous than the moment she stepped inside the medium-sized room that was painted in a light gray tone. A long foldable table was in the middle of the room with a small camcorder on a tripod next to it. Luci’s had many auditions, but this…this was real shit, the real deal. She was standing in front of Hollywood and big name producers who’d never heard of her name until the moment she walked in and they had a glimpse of her portfolio. 

She introduced herself, masking the nerves that were crawling up and down her body with a warm smile—not too bright, but enough to show her gorgeous grin. They asked her to read off of page twenty-three to twenty-five; taking a breath, she gave all that she could. And in her opinion, it’s the best acting she’d ever done, which is saying a lot because she thinks she did quite well after every show of Miss Saigon. 

The producers’ faces were unreadable as they simply looked at one another, writing a few notes on their yellow notepads. Luci wanted to lurk, to see what they were writing as she hoped they weren’t disappointed or had immediately crossed out her name from their list. 

They thanked her for coming in before dismissing her; she thanked them as well, waving as she walked out the door where she released the biggest sigh. It wasn’t from relief because she was still on edge of the result of her audition, but she felt like she had been holding her breath for the ten to fifteen minutes that she was in that room. Her heart was pounding quite sturdily; and if she was being honest, her mind had completely blanked out once they yelled ‘action,’ but that was usual for her. 

Now that it was ten days after her audition and Halloween, Harry practically begged Luci to get out of her apartment. She knew that she couldn’t stay cooped up in her room as she overthought the audition constantly. She began to get headaches from overthinking every single thing she did in that audition, and it drove her insane. 

So, when Harry suggested that she should go to the Halloween party that Daisy was throwing on the rooftop of her building, she dreaded it at first, but the thought of going out was calling her. She assumed Daisy wouldn’t want Luci to be at her party, but she invited the entire cast and a few more people that she knew personally, so it wasn’t like Daisy was going to speak to her. Since it was a party, everyone could bring a guest or a few friends, so that was when Luci begged Harry to attend with her. 

“Please, come with me.” She had her best pouty lip on, looking at him with doe eyes. Just by that look, he almost gave in, but he wasn’t sure if this type of party was for him. Harry was a mellow and chill guy; he didn’t need rooftop parties and unlimited amounts of booze. He was fine with a small gathering, a few movies and board games—now, that was his type of party. “The party would be so much more fun with you there.” 

Harry playfully scoffed. “Please. Luci, I’m the most boring guy there is.” 

Her brows furrowed in disagreement. “No, you’re not. I happen to think you’re quite fun.” He smiled softly at her in appreciation. “Please. We wouldn’t even have to stay that long.” 

He could tell that she wanted, no, needed him to be there with her. She wasn’t very close with her cast mates—despite all the months she’d been part of the production—besides Nina. But Nina knew everyone so Luci would be left awkwardly standing there, waiting for her friend to come back. 

“How long would we stay?” 

Her eyes brightened with hope. “However long you want.” 

“An hour? Hour and a half, tops?” 

“Sounds perfectly fine to me.” 

“And what would we wear?”

Luci was a bit shocked by his question. “You wanna match?” 

“I mean, that would be fun, right?” She nodded, agreeing. “Since it is quite last minute, I say we dress up as the 70s or 80s era. Pretty easy, right?” 

She liked the sound of that. “Yes, let’s do 70s! I wanna raid your closet because I know you have some gems in there.” 

Harry laughed out loud—her favorite laugh that was music to her ears. He knew he had a great sense of fashion, and he’d always go to the thrift store to pick up something that he’d never worn before. It wasn’t like he was not going to wear it, he just needed to be more comfortable with himself to wear the clothes that he buys. So, for now, he settled with black skinny jeans and patterned-print button downs, which is the most ‘flashy’ he’d dress as…for now. 

“I knew I liked you for a reason because I was hoping you’d say 70s.” Luci felt her cheeks warm up before they went to Harry’s apartment. 

It took an hour and a half to find an outfit that Harry liked; it would’ve been shorter, but with Harry’s 70s playlist that was playing in the background, they took breaks to dance and sing. Harry had a beautiful voice, Luci thought; and she wondered if he was ever in a band before or wrote music because he does have an elaborate music taste, and that added to Luci’s liking for him. 

They proceeded to go to Luci’s apartment so Harry could help her find an outfit. He brought his wireless speaker so the music wouldn’t stop; and she continuously threw the articles of clothing onto her bed—where Harry was lying on his stomach—every time he shook his head no. 

With the same amount of time it took Harry to decide on an outfit, Luci settled on hers. She looked in her full-body mirror, twirling around to see if it looked okay and if she was satisfied with it. Harry remained on her bed, admiring how beautiful she looked as he thought that she was way out of his league. As Luci was dancing and prancing around her apartment, Harry was deep in his thoughts; he didn’t know if asking Luci out was the way to go. Not only would he lose her as a friend when or if she rejects him, but he couldn’t bear the ache he would feel in his heart. 

For his own sake, he needed to protect himself before the heartbreak; and if that meant refraining himself from making a move, then that was completely fine to him. 

“Ready?” Luci called out from the doorway. Harry got off the bed, looking her up and down. 

She was wearing peach colored pants that flare at the bottom, sitting high on her waist; a white silk blouse with orange accents, a long brown coat because it was quite chilly outside, and pink glasses that were transparent. He thought she looked absolutely beautiful, and her outfit was meant for her. The colors matched Harry’s outfit as he wore rust-orange pants that sat wide at the bottom, a flashy patterned long-sleeved blouse with the collar matching his pants. Luci gave him a similar pair of glasses as hers, so they weren’t wearing shaded lenses in the nighttime. 

“Yup. You, uh, look really good.” 

Luci smiled, shrugging one shoulder. “Thank you! You look good, too. This color looks amazing on you.” 

Harry looked down at his outfit, hiding the blush that formed on his cheeks. “Thank you. I like it a lot.” 

They headed out and towards Daisy’s apartment building where the rooftop was large enough for everyone to stand comfortably without feeling like they were shoulder-to-shoulder. There were plenty of lounge chairs, and a few tall bar tables next to tall heaters, considering it was just below fifty degrees. 

Some people were making their way towards Daisy's apartment since it was too cold outside, but Harry and Luci decided to stay, both agreeing that the heaters were keeping them warm as they sipped on their drinks. 

“Luci!” Nina walked over towards her, giving her a hug; Luci made sure not to mess up the placement of her fairy wings. 

“You look amazing!” Luci complimented as Nina put her hands on her cheeks, thanking her friend. Luci could tell that Nina was a bit drunk already as her eyes were drooping and she couldn’t stand straight on her own two feet. 

“Harry! I’m so glad you’re here.” He smiled saying hello to her. Nina and Harry met in July when he had gone to see another show. He was giving Luci another bouquet of flowers—the same bundle that he gave her the last time since she told him that she really liked them, and they looked amazing on her windowsill—and she dragged him to find Nina since she was performing the same show. Nina immediately gave Luci that certain look that said ‘he’s really cute,’ and Luci just nodded, giving her an apparent look as well. 

“Did you bring anyone?” Luci asked, knowing that she was talking to a few guys; her favorites, from what Nina told her, was Laurent and Alec—the two guys that are in her Soul Cycle class, one on Monday and the other on Friday. 

Nina shook her head. “No. I wanted to get fucked up today and didn’t want any of my mans see that shit. Oh! Can I take a picture of you two? You both look so cute!” 

Luci looked at Harry, silently asking and he nodded. She stood beside him, not knowing whether to put her arm around his waist. They’d never taken a picture together before, after all the months of knowing each other. Luci handed Nina her phone before she turned on the flash, taking a picture of the two. Harry hesitantly puts his arm around Luci’s shoulder, making her look at him, smiling. She then wrapped her arm around his waist as they both smiled at each other before looking back at the camera. Nina was squealing behind the phone because she just captured the cute and quiet interaction between them that made for a sweet candid. 

Nina handed Luci’s phone back to her before she told her that she was going to talk to some other people. The two women hugged, and Nina said goodbye to Harry. 

Harry leaned into Luci’s side, bending down slightly. “Send me those pictures, yeah?” 

A chill ran through her body at the sound of his voice so close to her ear. “Sure,” she croaked out, sending the pictures to him. 

After a few moments of light conversation and humming the beat of the music, Harry asked, “So, which one is Daisy?” 

Luci looked at him, quite shocked as to what sparked his interest in her, but she didn’t say anything. She looked around until she spotted her in a leather catwoman suit, hugging her body tightly that Luci thought it was cutting off her circulation. But she had to admit that it looked amazing on her. 

“That one.” She slyly pointed at Daisy who was talking to some of her friends. Luci was surprised to see that Samuel wasn’t here, considering that he was part of the cast. Daisy and Samuel seemed to be in their ‘off again’ stage of their relationship; and no one who was part of the cast or who was close to them could keep up with how many times they’d been through that stage, but they seemed to like each other too much to call it quits for good. 

“Hmm. She seems nice.” 

“Yeah, she does—to everyone except me.” They were both looking at Daisy, and it was like Daisy could sense a few eyes on her, so she looked around and made direct eye contact with Luci. She excused herself to her group of friends before making her way towards her and Harry. “Speak of the devil.” Luci sighed, making Harry chuckle. 

“Luci! I’m so glad you made it.” Daisy faked a smile as she greeted Luci with a hug, which surprised both Luci and Harry. Daisy pulled away, immediately locking eyes on this. “Oh, who’s your friend?” Instantly, Luci knew why Daisy was so nice to her; it was because she spotted Harry and didn’t want him to think she was such a bitch. 

With her brows furrowed, Luci shifted a little closer to Harry who was standing there and not saying anything. “This is Harry.” 

Daisy flashed him her stunning smile that wooed almost everyone. “Hi, I’m Daisy.” He shook her hand, introducing himself. “Your outfit looks really good.” She complimented him. 

“Thanks, Luci helped me pick it out.” He smiled at Luci, who was smirking. For a second, Daisy rolled her eyes before she returned to her big smile. 

“Would you like to get a drink with me? I see you’re almost empty.” Daisy’s eyes pointed at his cup, which only had a small sip lingering at the bottom of his clear plastic cup. 

“Uh-”

“C’mon, just one drink?” Her voice was innocent and sweet, nothing like the cruel and rude Daisy that Luci knew all too well. 

What Luci expected Harry to say was that he was okay and that he didn’t want a drink with her, but he responded quite the opposite. 

“Okay, sure.” Luci’s head averted towards Harry as she looked at him with shock and a face asking what the fuck he was doing. But he shrugged as Daisy clapped, grabbing his wrist and pulling him towards the bar. Luci huffed, watching the two walk away and she was left by herself with a watered down drink and the cold air. 

She figured she’d wait for him to come back to where she was sitting, hoping he wouldn’t take too long. 

But twenty minutes had gone by, and Luci started getting annoyed.  

Thirty minutes, and Luci tells herself that she doesn’t care and mindlessly goes on her phone. 

An hour had gone by when Luci huffed, mentally saying that she does give a shit and goes to find Harry. 

How long could one drink take anyways? Definitely not an hour, Luci thought. She searched the rooftop for the two, only to hope that Harry was looking for her too. After ten minutes of looking around the rooftop, passing her cast mates who were asking her to take a shot with them—she took another one, adding more alcohol into her body—she couldn’t find Harry. She started to think the worst; he could’ve possibly taken Daisy home, or Daisy could have taken him up to her room—either way, she didn’t like any of those options. 

For a minute, she mentally debated if she should check Daisy’s apartment, which would be better since it was warmer indoors than it was out—she was convinced it got colder once Harry left her side—but the negative side of her mind, who was taunting her like the devil on her left shoulder, told her to check if Harry was inside because she wasn’t going to like what she was going to see. 

Either way, she needed to find Harry and she didn’t want to go home without him, so she went inside the building and took the elevator down to Daisy’s floor. There were people walking in and out of her place, so it wasn’t that difficult to find which one was hers. With the same amount of people inside her apartment as there was on the rooftop, Luci made her way through the nice and luxurious apartment. She was just on the edge of tipsy; the drinks with her coworkers had gotten her there. Heading up the stairs, she passed by people who were making out, cuddling on the steps, and talking. 

Once she got to the end of the hallway, she had almost given up on her search for Harry until the door at the end of the hall opened, revealing Harry who was leaving and quietly closing the door. 

Luci stood in the middle with an expressionless face. He hadn’t seen her yet, but the way she wasn’t giving any emotion didn’t mean that she didn’t care; the thoughts in her mind were invading every inch that there was just too much to focus on. 

Harry turned around, stopping in his tracks once he faced her. 

“Hey,” he greeted softly. 

“Hi.” 

“I’m sorry for leaving-”

“Were you…” Luci referred to what was happening inside the room as she couldn’t finish her sentence because the thought and the words simply disgusted her. 

“N-No.”

“Why do you seem unsure?” She was testing him; she heard the hesitancy in his voice, like he wasn’t sure if he wanted to tell the truth. 

A new attitude rose him. “Why do you care?” His voice was a tad bit harsher, but he was a little confused on why she was questioning his actions. 

She inhaled and exhaled deeply, crossing her arms, avoiding his question. “I’m going home. Are you coming with or…?” Harry bit the inside of his cheek, remembering that she hadn’t answered his question, so he’ll ask again later. He nodded, and Luci turned around; he followed. 

The entire ride on the subway and walking towards their apartment building was quiet. They didn’t even sit next to each other like they always did; just across one another, avoiding eye contact.

It was when they were both in front and unlocking their doors was when Harry spoke up. 

“Luci.” She stopped her movements, turning around slowly as did he. This time, she looked at him so deeply in the eyes that it was physically difficult for her to take her eyes off him. “Why were you mad at me before we left?” 

On the ride back home, Harry thought about the events at the party. He’d never seen Luci so annoyed at him before, so it got him thinking a lot about what she felt for him. She was jealous, anyone could see that, and he wanted her to say it out loud why she was jealous because he could name a few reasons. 

“Did you have a good time with Daisy?” 

Harry breathed out a chuckle. “You’re jealous,” he stated immediately. 

“Answer my question-”

“Then answer mine.” 

The tension was so thick that with just one small poke of a needle, it would collapse and break. They’d never had this type of conversation before, where the tension was rising and the room felt warm; they were always playful and laughing with each other that neither of them thought they were capable of having this certain type of energy with one another. 

“I was mad because you left me alone at the party…with Daisy of all people,” she said honestly, leaving a few things out. 

“Is that all?” He raised his brows, crossing his arms. 

Luci shook her head. “That’s not how it works, Styles. I answer yours, you answer mine.” 

A smug grin landed on Harry’s face. “Did I have a good time with Daisy?” He repeated her question. “To be honest with you, no. She was pretty drunk, so I took her to her bedroom—that’s why I was in there, She was…nice.” Luci sensed a ‘but’ trailing. “She even asked me if I’d wanna go out some time.”

“What’d you say?” 

He tsked. “Not how it works, Suki.” Luci rolled her eyes, letting out a soft huff. “Hey, they’re your rules.” He chuckled. “Now, answer this: why were you jealous?” 

There was a surge of confidence that Harry’s never felt before; maybe it was because he knew things Luci didn’t know herself, but watching her unfold those realizations was definitely feeding his ego. 

Luci sighed deeply before she started. “Knowing that Daisy could possibly get anyone she wanted was a bit of an insecurity of mine when we were on our way to the party. That was because I knew she’d want you. I mean…look at you, you’re literally so gorgeous.” Harry blushed. “And I knew that it was inevitable that she would ask you to hang out; I was just surprised when you said yes.” 

He nodded. “I rejected her when she asked if I wanted to go out.” A bit of weight lifted from Luci’s shoulders, but not completely as there was still something heavy she’s been wanting to say. “Why’d you hope I’d say no? Besides the obvious that she’s mean and rude to you.” 

Alright, time to fess up, Luci. 

Luci inhaled deeply, hoping her confession wouldn’t have him running for the hills. “Because why would you go out with her when you could go out with me? Like, on a date…” Her anxiety was up to her chin as she locked her hands behind her back, preventing them from shaking any more than they already were. 

That one simple question had answered all of the other questions swirling in his mind; not the ones that were asked in the rapid fire round of questioning and answering under the thick cloud of tension over them, but the ones he asked himself a few months ago when he was doubting that she’d ever felt something for him because all this time, she had felt something, and she just asked him out. 

His heart flipped. “You wanna go on a date with me?” 

“Yeah, I’ve been wanting to ask, but I didn’t know if you were interested in me or not,” she said shyly. Luci hadn’t asked someone out before—someone she was really interested in. She’d either wait until they asked her and if they didn’t, she’d move on and pretend that her feelings for them never existed. But Harry was different; seeing him with Daisy tonight had made her realize just how much she felt for him. He made her laugh, smile, and he was such a kind person. 

“I’d love to.” He suddenly answered, taking her back a little. 

She looked at him with wide eyes. “R-Really?” 

“Yeah. I’ve been meaning to ask you too, because I’m very much interested in you, but I didn’t know you were interested, well, until tonight.” Luci giggled. 

“I made it pretty obvious that I was jealous, huh?” 

“A tad bit, but it’s sweet; and I wasn’t gonna go on a date with Daisy. She’s no Luciana Ivy Suki.” He teased, making her face heat up at the sound of her full name coming from his lips. She wanted to kiss him right then and then, wanted to taste the sweet taste that he was storing in his mouth; but she refrained from doing so, figuring that they’d wait until after their date—whenever that was—to wait to kiss him because it would very much be worth the wait. 

“Okay, I’ll, uh, plan the date then.” Her lips turned up, feeling a certain ache on her cheeks already from smiling too much. 

“Can I plan it too?” He genuinely asked. 

“I did ask you, Harry.” She raised her brows teasingly. 

“Alright, alright. I’ll plan the next date then.” He blushed. 

Luci tilted her head, smiling sweetly at his words. “The next date, huh? We haven’t even been on the first date; what makes you think there’ll be a second one.” 

“Oh, love, I think there will be.” Harry stepped closer to her, heart pounding in his chest; Luci gulped at the closeness. For a moment, she thought he was going to kiss her by the way he was looking at her intently. And for a moment, she was gonna give in and say ‘fuck waiting,’ and kiss his pink lips until he leaned forward and kissed her soft cheek for a brief moment. “Can’t wait for our date. Let me know what the plans are.” 

“O-Okay.” The touch of his lips on her skin had stunned her, and she wanted them back on her instantly. 

Harry opened his door, giving Luci a small smile before walking in. She started to slowly back into her open apartment, holding onto the door handle tightly. Before they closed their doors, they stared at one another, admiring each other before they said: 

“Sweet dreams, Luciana.” 

“Sweet dreams, Harry.” 

November 8, 2017 

Harry strongly knocked three times on the door right across from his own door with a bag full of takeout, another bag full of snacks, and a small brown bag that had a white box inside. 

The door swung open; Luci smiled at the person behind it. 

“Happy Birthday, love!” Harry greeted.

“Aww, Harry, thank you so much.” She was surprised that he remembered, let alone bring a celebration to her as she eyed the bags in his hands. Luci turned twenty-six today; her day was full of greetings from her cast mates, her family, and FaceTime calls from her brother and parents. She was going to make a trip back home for a day or two since she had to perform on Friday, but she was going to see her parents during Thanksgiving, so FaceTime calls had to suffice till then. 

Stepping to the side, she invited him in. He hugged her tightly, kissing the side of her head as her face heated up. They walked to the kitchen, and Harry set the bags on the countertop, unraveling the tie of the takeout. 

“First, I’m sorry for just showing up unannounced and invading your place.” He added a breathy laugh. 

“No, it’s okay! You’re welcomed any time,” she genuinely said; Harry made a mental note of that. 

“Second, this is not a date. I know you didn’t want today to be our first date, but I couldn’t just sit in my apartment and not do anything on your special day! So, here I am.” 

“Here you are.” Luci couldn’t help the warmth that rushed to her face and neck. 

“Third, I brought Chinese since it’s your favorite food. And I just so happen to know a lovely place that has the best Chinese in Brooklyn, which is my favorite place that I’ll take you to soon, but know that you’re so incredibly special because I never take anyone there.” He took the takeaway boxes out of the bag, opening them up as steam released from the boxes. 

Luci leaned against the countertop. “And what makes me so special?” Teasingly fluttering her eyes. 

Harry stopped what he was doing, looking at her intently. “You’re so sweet, funny, and incredibly kind. But most importantly, you’re grounded and humble; and you’re special to me.” His dimpled poked through his skin as he smiled, meaning every word. 

Heart flipping, stomach in knots, and tears washing over her eyes, Luci walked around the counter to hug him, head resting against his chest as she whispered a ‘thank you’ in his ear. 

For the rest of their night, they ate the authentic Chinese food while Harry told her about the restaurant he got it from, including the workers who owned the place. They also talked about work, teased, flirted, and bantered about whether fruit belonged in salads—they do not. 

Harry gave her the brown paper bag that held her gift, and she opened it with shock. He gifted her a gold circle pin that was customized with her initials engraved in the middle, and the saying ‘Shine bright, Dream even bigger,’ separated at the top and bottom. He’d noticed that she had pins on her travel backpack, and would occasionally wear one on the side of her baseball cap. It was the most thoughtful and attentive gift she’d ever received, and that earned Harry a tight hug and many thank you’s. 

After the night was coming close to eleven-thirty, Harry called it a night as he still had to wake up early tomorrow for work. Their goodbye at her door was a long one that was filled with tight and long hugs as they swayed for a moment, enjoying the warmth of each other. They promised each other that they would find a day that was open in their schedule so they could finally have their date; they even pinky swore on it—Harry kissed her pinky, vowing. 

Luci watched Harry open his door before walking inside his apartment; she blew him a kiss as he caught it, placing his palm on his cheek, making her smile. 

As they closed their doors, Luci couldn’t help but think that she just had the best birthday ever. 

November 17, 2017 

Luci’s leg nervously shook as she waited for her digital clock to hit 2:30 p.m. 

Today was Luci and Harry’s first date, and will hopefully be written down in history. She’d been anticipating this day for a while now, and she couldn’t believe the day was finally here. The few days after she asked him out, they tried settling on a date, but the two weeks after Halloween were booked for them. 

Luci was performing most days out of the week and Harry needed to figure out his teaching plans since it was close to Thanksgiving break and winter break. But when Harry found out that he had a random Friday off, he immediately told her, and to their luck, Luci wasn’t performing that day. So, they were settled on a day, and Luci couldn’t wait to take him out. 

She told him that he was going to need to dress warm since they were going to be outside for most of the day, so he opted for light blue jeans that were a bit baggy, a white t-shirt, a black coat that had faux fur on the thick collar and cuffs; since he, assumingly, was going to be walking around a lot, he wore black old school vans. Harry looked in the mirror, ruffling his hair in his hands to get it to stick the way he wanted it to. His hands slightly shook as he was fixing his hair, and he realized he hadn’t felt this nervous in a while; it had been a while since he’d gone on a date with someone he truly liked. 

When it hit two-thirty, Harry opened his door and locked it before taking a step forward. He took a breath, shaking his nerves off; as he was just about to knock, he heard Luci shuffling around inside her apartment as her keys jingled in her hands and her boots thudded against the wood. He put his hand down, thinking it would be nice for her to just see him right when she opened the door. After a few moments, Luci felt like she had everything she needed, so she swung her door open to only find Harry standing right in front of it, hiding behind a familiar bouquet of flowers—her favorite ones from him. 

“Hello.” He smiled, dimples clearly present. Luci felt like she could cry on the spot from just being so overwhelmed with her nerves and the anticipation leading up to this day, this moment. “These are for you. Hope you never get tired of them.” Harry handed her the bouquet, and she hugged them to her chest. 

“Harry, thank you. Believe me, I would never.” The start of her cheek aches had begun, and it had been about thirty seconds into their date. But cheek aches with Harry were her favorite type of aches, so she didn’t really mind it. 

She went back inside her apartment as Harry followed her in; she put the flowers in a vase before fixing them a little, making sure none of them were drooping down on the edge of the glass vase. Placing them on her windowsill, where she usually puts the flowers Harry gifted her, she smiled gratefully at them before turning her head and smiling at Harry, extra grateful. 

“Shall we go?” He asked, and she nodded. 

Harry followed Luci down to the subway station as she got on the M train. In eleven minutes, there were four stops; the subway was quite packed with no available seats, so the two stood, holding onto the silver bar in between them with their bodies close in proximity as they stood. Harry took the chance to look down at her, simply admiring her beauty as she mindlessly looked around, not noticing his eyes lingering on her. 

When their stop was on Essex Street, they got off, transferring onto the F train towards Coney Island; and Harry suddenly knew exactly where they were going. He didn’t say anything but smile. The entirety of the ride took forty-two minutes with twenty-two stops; they were able to sit down next to each other after the first stop. 

Their bodies were close—thigh to thigh, shoulder to shoulder. Luci took out her wired earphones—figuring they were going to be there for a while, why not listen to some music—handing Harry the left one as she put the right one in. She played Fleetwood Mac, Tame Impala, ABBA, Lorde, and Hozier—a few artists they’d bonded over—as they both swayed in their seats, making up some dance routine with their arms and shoulders. They laughed and ignored the weird looks of bystanders, who were trying to have a peaceful train ride to their destination, but Luci and Harry were too focused on each other to care. 

Once it was their stop, Luci put her headphones and phone in her purse before they got off and walked side by side one another. Harry had the urge to pull her close to his side, to hold her soft hand, but he was too shy to make a move. When they walked up the stairs to exit the station, their fingers brushed together—practically bumping into one another. Luci confidently made the move and linked their fingers together; Harry looked down and back up at her as he blushed, squeezing her hand lightly. 

“Is this okay?” She asked, looking up at him. 

“It’s perfect.” He meant it; the way her small hands fit so perfectly into his, as if he was protecting them. Holding her hand was comforting, and it surprised him at how comfortable he was to be making physical contact with her; but ever since he met Luci, he’s surprised himself quite a few times already. 

They finally reached their first date hotspot, and Harry assumed right as to where she was taking him. 

Three wide entryways painted in navy blue and orange had ‘Luna Park’ painted in orange at the top. Above the entryways were large flower-like and crescent moons that lit up during the nighttime, giving the boardwalk the most illuminating glow. The large Ferris wheel could not be missed as the carts swung and rattled back and forth. On top of the excitement of the amusement park, there were screams from people who were on the roller coasters, and the smell of fair food that they couldn’t wait to devour. 

Luci paid for their entrance admission, and Harry frowned, wanting to pay, but they both agreed that they could go half on the food, and games and rides. 

They felt like little kids who were at Disneyland, minus the famous castle and Main Street music, as they walked around the park to check it out as the wood beneath them creaked with every step while they hadn’t let go of each other’s hands. 

“Everything looks really fun,” Harry exclaimed.

“Right! Do you wanna play some games first or ride on some rides?” 

“How about we get the rides out of the way? You look very excited to go on them, and I have a feeling there’s no way you’re not going on them without me.” Harry assumed, quite accurately. 

Luci put her hand on her heart teasingly. “You know me too well.” Harry chuckled. “Okay, let’s go on some rides!” She dragged him to the admissions booth, and Harry paid for both of their passes for rides. 

They waited in line for the ‘Cyclone,’ which was the biggest rollercoaster besides the Wonder Wheel. Luci sensed Harry’s nerves as he kept looking up at the ride, and he couldn’t keep still. 

She squeezed his hand tightly. “Harry, you don’t have to go on the ride with me.” She was starting to feel concerned for him because his hands were becoming damp, which she didn’t care for, and he kept bouncing his leg everytime the line stopped moving. 

He raised his brows, and brushed away his nerves to the side but not very far. “No, no. It’s okay—I’ll be okay.” 

“Are you sure?” 

Pressing a kiss to the back of her hand, he nodded. “I’m sure. We’re here to have some fun, not be nervous, right?” 

“Yeah. But I’ll admit, I was nervous before we left,” she said, hoping to change the subject to distract him from the fast ride above them. 

“Why’s that?” He curled his lips into his mouth. 

“This is our first date, I want it to go well,” she said honestly. It had been a while since she’d been on a real date—the last one being in college—but to be nervous for a date was a feeling she wasn’t familiar with. 

“Think it’s going quite well, don’t you think?” He gave her a toothless grin, brows raised. Luci nodded, happy that he was always reassuring her and making her feel comfortable. “Plus, I was nervous too—still am, if I’m being honest.” 

“Yeah?” 

He nodded his head as if his nerves were the most obvious thing. “Oh, yeah. I want this to go well too. But by the way we’ve been friends for months before this happened, I think we’ll be okay, Ci.” Her eyes slightly widened at the new nickname that she’d never heard; Harry instantly noticed her shock. “I-Is it okay if I call you that?” To be honest, he’s always wanted to call her some unique nickname that would only be for him. ‘Luci’ seemed to be the name everyone called her, ‘Ana’ was her brother’s name for her, so the last syllable in her name seemed to be free. 

“No one’s ever called me that.” And she thinks that’s extra special. “But yes, please call me that.” She approved, and he smiled. 

It was their turn to get onto the Cyclone, and Harry suddenly didn’t feel so nervous anymore as they were being safely strapped into their rollercoaster cart. The ride was quite high, looking over the blue water and Coney Island Beach; the view was quite gorgeous, even in the middle of a cold November day in New York. 

They screamed as the ride dropped; Luci held up one of her arms as the other held tightly on Harry’s hand as he grasped the metal bar, afraid to bravely put his arm up like his beautiful date. 

When the ride was finished, they had a rush of exhilaration, wanting to go on the other rides. So, they did; they laughed, screamed, and were the most carefree people they’d ever been in their entire lives because they brought it out of each other. 

After they filled their rollercoaster crave, they ate and talked. Individually, they were both worried about this part of the date where they had to talk because they’d been hanging out for so many months and getting to know each other that they thought coming up with conversation topics were going to be difficult. But it was natural for them; they didn’t put any pressure on themselves to speak every single minute of the date. Instead, they relished in the comfortable silence they seemed to form, not minding it one bit. 

The sky had turned into a cotton candy pink from a bright blue quite quickly. Luci wanted to watch the sunset, but was a bit sad that they hadn’t played the majority of the games; but Harry told her it was okay, and they would come back another time when the park reopened again during the Spring. 

Hand in hand, they walked to the beach that was just across the street from Luna Park. The bright lights from the park were becoming distant as they continued to walk further away from it. Since it was mid November, there weren’t that many people out because of the cold temperature—just the few people who were passing by along with others who decided to watch the sunset as well. 

“Tell me about your last relationship?” Luci suddenly asked; Harry looked at her amusingly. 

“Like now? In the middle of our date?” He teased, making her laugh. 

“I mean, if you want to. I was just curious.” 

Harry thought for a moment. “Hmm. My last serious relationship was over a year ago. We broke up right before I started teaching at the middle school.” 

“What happened?” She asked softly, not wanting to pry, but she was also curious. 

“We weren’t good for each other anymore. I guess life happened, and we turned into people we weren’t proud of. We grew apart; she was more in love with her career than she was in love with me. Couldn’t say I was the best boyfriend either,” he explained, not getting into too much detail. But he’d neglected her without even realizing it, causing his ex to occupy herself with work. “So, we broke up. And it felt like it was a sign from the universe that was holding me back from venturing out because I immediately got a job at the school when I had been putting off finding a proper teaching job.” He breathed out a chuckle, remembering the memory.

He’ll admit, his last relationship had hurt him quite a lot. He’d never felt such pain before, and it had made him quiet and reserved. But how it ended made him not seek out to find a relationship. For a while, he didn’t like the idea of love because it had only hurt you. But then he met Luci, and at first, he was hesitant to even be her friend because just at first glance, he was ruined, and he didn’t want to go through that process again; but here they are now. And maybe, he’ll tell her this, but for now, he doesn’t want to scare her off. 

“Do you still talk to her?” 

“Nope. Last I heard of her, she was engaged to this woman she met a few weeks after our breakup, but I have no clue if they’re still together.” He shrugged his shoulders. “What about you?” 

“My last relationship?” Harry nodded. “To be honest, I’ve never been in a serious one…like ever.” 

He raised his brows in shock. “Really?” 

“Yeah. The furthest I’ve gone that was close to a relationship was a friends-with-benefits towards the end of college, which didn’t end well.” Harry sensed her mood change a bit, so he didn’t pry on asking what happened in the past. The bad memories had filled her mind, making her frown, but she pushed those thoughts away, not wanting to think about them at the moment because the timing is unbelievable. “That’s that; I don't have any exciting or tea-spilling relationship stories.” 

For a moment, she didn’t want to jinx her luck, but she imagined what it would be like to be in a relationship with Harry—despite it only being their first date. Her mind took her to a fantasy that was so special and sweet because that was how she pictured what it would be like to be with him. 

They sat in silence as the sound of the waves crashing and the seagulls above them took over their hearing. It was nice and refreshing to sit side by side, taking in the beautiful scenery that the world provided. Sunsets had always made Luci feel a vast amount of gratitude towards the world and the people around her; the opportunities, the things that she got to see—they all wouldn’t have happened if the sun didn't go down, promising a new tomorrow. 

Suddenly, Harry stood up, brushing the sand that had gotten on his jeans. He reached out to Luci, who was still sitting down and looking up at him. 

“C’mon. Let’s walk,” he suggested. She grabbed his hand as he helped her up, and she patted away the soft sand that had stuck to her black jeans. 

They held hands as they walked the shore of Coney Island Beach, walking towards where the sun was departing from the world. Once the sky had turned into a purple and orange blended masterpiece, Harry stopped walking, facing Luci as he took a deep breath. 

“I’m trying…really hard to hold back.” He held her cold hands in his, lightly pushing and pulling her towards him. He’d been thinking about it for the entirety of their date, and he just wanted to pull her in and kiss her whenever.

Luci shook her head softly as she stopped swaying; her eyes flickered towards his mouth, glad she wasn’t the only one thinking the same thing. She dreamed of this—had been wanting to press her lips against his for quite some time 

“Don’t hold back. Please, don’t hold back.” Her tone and eyes were pleading for him to not refrain himself from the most magical feeling. Luci let go of his hands, wrapping them around his waist as if she was giving him permission to kiss her. 

He placed his hands on her shoulders, gently rubbing down to her elbows before he trailed them back up and to the sides of her neck and jaw. Placing a soft kiss to her forehead before placing his on Luci’s, he inhaled deeply, taking in the saltiness of the ocean next to them and the sweetness of her skin. 

Luci fluttered her eyes closed, and Harry took that opportunity to connect his lips with hers. They molded their lips together as if it were one, tasting one another for the first time. The feeling of their passionate kiss felt like the ocean had synchronized together, forming the most beautiful and largest wave for the most dedicated surfer; and when it crashed, it was powerful, breathtaking, and strong—like no other wave could top this one, no one could top this one of a kind kiss. 

Harry smiled into the kiss, making Luci smile and giggle as well. Her stomach fluttered, hugging him tighter to her as his thumbs gently caressed her soft skin. Nothing could top this feeling. 

Pulling back, Harry breathed out a giddy chuckle before placing a few more pecks on her lips as if he was dreaming the first time. Luci opened her eyes as did he; she looked into his and found an immense amount of adoration within him. 

“I like you…a lot.” 

She leaned her forehead against his chest, cheekily smiling and restricting herself from squealing before she looked back up at him. “I like you too, Harry.” 

Harry flashed her his smile, something that he couldn’t wipe off his face, not like he tried. Nowadays, he was smiling a lot more, and he was one hundred percent sure Luci was the cause of it. 

Kissing her forehead, Harry hugged her to his chest as they watched the sun go down. With her face pressed against his chest, she heard the erratic heartbeat that was pounded heavily; and in that moment, she knew exactly how that felt—to feel so much for one person that your heart could fall out—and she only hoped he could feel hers because it was pounding just the same. 

As they held each other tightly, they both knew that this was going to be something special. 

And they were all in for the ride.

an exciting chapter! come talk to me about your thoughts, feelings, favorite moments and scenes! thank you for reading <3 next chapter will be up next saturday!