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seungkw1 · 2 months ago

Text

ring my bell — ljh

♡ pairing: neighbor!jihoon x afab!reader ♡ theme: smut [18+ mdni] ♡ wc: 7k ♡ warnings: sub!reader, but also subby!jihoon, size kink, praise kink, auralism/ecouteurism, masturbation (m. & f.), oral (m. & f. receiving), unprotected piv sex (do not do this), cum swallowing, creampie, cockwarming, dacryphilia, size kink, hair pulling, gagging, missionary, 69, nipple play/boob worship, multiple orgasms, sex toys, mild alcohol consumption, did i mention size kink, lil fluff at the end ♡ a/n: i abandoned this fic at least five times lmao but then one night at like 2am the brain rot took over and here we are! tysm to @wonwovy for beta reading, @shinysobi for the title suggestion, and @miniseokminnies for help w the photos <3

When you moved into your new condo, you were pretty sure you hit the jackpot. At first, you were a bit suspicious - how could the rent be so low in this part of town, with such a nice building? But for two months after you moved in, you’ve had no problems. Sure, the shower head is a bit leaky sometimes, and you could use a bit more storage space, but overall - no complaints. As an added bonus the unit next to you was vacant - aka, peace and quiet. Perfection.

That vacancy didn't last forever, though. Two months in, and you found yourself with a new neighbor. You haven't had a chance to properly introduce yourself to him yet, but from the brief glimpses of him you've gotten he seems nice. You suspect he's around your age, a bit quiet, definitely keeps to himself but has been very polite in passing. And while he's not exactly your type, you do admit he is pretty cute. So, nothing wrong with him.

You did, however, quickly discover two major problems. One, it turns out the walls are paper fucking thin. And two - to make matters worse - his bedroom is apparently right on the other side of yours, sharing a wall. And you can hear everything.

By the sounds of it, the guy is single. You never hear any other voices, just his - soft moans emanating through the sad excuse for a wall, gradually getting louder, culminating in a symphony of unholy noises. You've never heard a man be so… vocal before.

At first, you just try to ignore it. Obviously, he's doing nothing wrong - this is simply a consequence of shared living spaces. So you do your best to mind your business.

Easier said than done.

A week passes. You still haven't had a chance to actually say hi to your new neighbor, but you already feel like you've become intimately acquainted with him. It feels a bit… wrong. This is very clearly a one-sided situation. You don't even know the guy’s name for fuck’s sake. Yet, each time, a sharp aching sensation forms a pit in your stomach. You find yourself fantasizing about him - wishing you could be on the other side of the wall, wishing you were the one responsible for the sounds being produced.

You've gone and fallen for a complete stranger - or at least, the idea of him. Fucking great.

You just need to actually meet him, you tell yourself. He could be a complete asshole. Or maybe just not your type at all. Once you say hi, you'll get over this silly little fantasy in no time.

I’ll make sure to run into him tomorrow, you determine. You go to bed, content with your plan.

Not five minutes after you crawl under the covers, you start to hear faint groans.

You reach for your airpods, but they're not on your nightstand. You must have left them in the other room.

It’s fine, you decide. It’ll be over soon enough.

But tonight, apparently, he is taking his sweet time.

You stuff your head under the pillows, trying to drown out the sensual sounds, but the moaning persists. Even muffled it’s loud - and it only gets worse as the minutes pass.

Just when you think he’s about to finish, the sounds cease. Thank god, you think as you roll over, ready to finally get some sleep.

But a minute later he starts up again. Slowly at first, once again taking his time, increasing his speed at an excruciatingly slow pace. Eventually his breaths grow shorter, his groaning louder. Then, he stops.

As if he set out to torment you tonight, he begins once more.

You lay there, eyes closed, unmoving, breathing deeply, trying to ignore the aching between your legs. But it's impossible.

The third time around, he's clearly very on edge. His moans turn loud, whiny, pathetic. It's probably the hottest thing you've ever heard.

Don’t do it don't do it don't do it…

As if your arm has gained a mind of its own, your hand slides beneath the fabric of your underwear. You gasp as your fingers slip between your folds - you're fucking wet.

Your already-throbbing bud pulsates between your fingers. Slowly, you begin to rub your clit. The sensation is immediately overwhelming; the uninhibited cries of pleasure emanating from the other side of the wall are enough to send you over the edge. Just when you think you can't take another moment of this, he cums. And so do you.

Your free hand clasps over your mouth just in time. You try as hard as you possibly can to stay silent - but you want to scream. You writhe against the sheets to the sound of his release, riding out your orgasm on your fingertips. Muffled cries escape despite your efforts - but are lost amidst the man’s sea of moans. You cum long and hard, savoring every last moment of your high.

As you start to come down, you sink into your mattress, body spent, mind drifting off. Your neighbor seems to have exhausted himself too - the only sounds carrying through the wall now being that of deep breaths.

So much for running into him tomorrow.

You flop over onto your side, shoving the thought away - but you know even if you try, you can't avoid him forever.

You just pray to god he didn't hear you.

Of course, after a week without any encounters, you manage to run into him the very next day.

Upon returning from the grocery store, you head to your building’s elevator. The doors are closing as you approach, so you figure you'll just take the next one - but the occupant holds the door for you.

“Thank you,” you say cheerfully, but as you step inside your stomach drops. You are face to face with your new neighbor.

“You’re welcome,” he replies, making direct eye contact with you. You want to disappear into the walls, but you maintain your composure. The button for your floor is already lit up, so he presses the close door button.

“I believe I just moved into the unit next to yours,” he says as you set your heavy bags on the floor. “I've seen you around but haven't had a chance to introduce myself. I’m Jihoon.”

He extends his hand out to you. You instantly regret setting your bags down.

You smile calmly, hoping he doesn't notice how flustered you are. But as you slide your hand into his, your heart rate rises. It doesn't help that he has really nice hands - large, warm, with fingers long and graceful, and a nice strong grip against your own hand. Your mind flashes back to the events of last night, picturing what those hands were doing…

Stop it.

“I’m y/n,” you reply with a smile, trying to be as normal as possible. “Nice to meet you.”

You withdraw your hand from his grasp as he lets go - nonchalantly, but with haste. Any longer and your palms would have probably started sweating.

“So, how are you liking it here so far?” you ask casually.

“So far so good,” he replies. “I'm honestly surprised that I was able to find anything in this part of town for such a good deal. Nice and quiet here too.”

Quiet.

You fear your suspicions are correct: he has no idea he's been putting on a nightly show for you.

The elevator gives a soft ding as it comes to a stop. You reach down to grab your bags as the door opens.

“Can I help you with that?”

“Oh, uh… sure.”

He picks up the heavy bags with ease. You could tell that he’s a muscular guy, but up close he looks straight up beefy. It doesn't help that the tight shirt he's wearing hugs all his muscles perfectly, his biceps nearly bursting out of his sleeves. You force yourself to look away before you start fucking drooling.

He delivers the bags to your front door. He returns them to you with care, making sure you have a firm grip on the handles before letting go. His hand lingers upon yours momentarily - the lightest brush of his fingertips against yours enough for your insides to do a somersault.

“Thanks again,” you tell him, making the mistake of direct eye contact again.

“Of course,” Jihoon replies warmly. “See you around.”

You flash him a smile, perhaps a bit too enthusiastically. “Bye!!” you blurt abruptly as you unlock your front door, hurrying inside. You want to turn around, get one more good look at him - but you shut the door behind you.

Your head spins as you put your groceries away. You're so wrapped up in your imagination that you nearly put the milk in the cabinet. But you can't stop daydreaming about what those muscles look like underneath his shirt.

You finish up and head into your bedroom. A nice hot shower should clear your mind. Not two seconds after taking off your shirt, you freeze. The familiar sounds from next door have begun yet again.

You stand there, half horrified, half horny. Surely it's nothing more than coincidence that your neighbor got home and started jacking off minutes after having a conversation with you. He was probably gonna do that anyway, you try to convince yourself. You're just having main character syndrome right now, this has nothing to do with you.

But your gut is telling you otherwise.

Mindlessly your fingers drift to your bra clasp, removing the garment. Taking your breast in one hand you stroke your thumb over your nipple, already hard from sudden exposure to the cool air of your room. You let yourself stand there for a minute, listening to Jihoon’s soft moans, imagining you could see him through the wall, slowly stroking his cock in his hands.

You feel guilty, ashamed, but the aching in your cunt overpowers any sense of remorse. Your hand makes its way into your pants, your fingers gliding through your folds, slipping easily into your soaked pussy. You wince silently, stifling the moans desperately trying to escape you. Slowly, you begin to fuck yourself. You can't help but think about how it would feel if it were Jihoon’s fingers inside you instead.

You stand there for a couple minutes, your clit throbbing against the motion of your palm - threatening to make you scream and cum.

You can't let him hear you, you keep telling yourself. But part of you almost wants him to hear you. You picture him getting so turned on hearing your cries of pleasure that he cums instantly, all over himself, making a huge mess that you would love nothing more than to help clean up.

You feel your climax rapidly approaching. You cease moving your fingers, but let them remain resting inside you. You try to calm yourself down, taking deep breaths to slow your pounding heart, but just as your head starts to clear you hear a sudden swell of orgasmic sounds from through the wall. As if by reflex your hand moves again. Your body tremors at the pressure against your overstimulated clit - you cum in silence, forcing your cries back inside you as . You ride out your high, and so does Jihoon, his moans slowly softening as he comes back down.

Heart pounding, you slowly remove your fingers from your cunt. Your hand is soaked; you find yourself wishing it was Jihoon's face instead, glistening with your juices after eating you out, making you cum an unreasonable amount of times.

You sigh. You know this should all feel wrong. But why does it feel so good then?

A strange combination of feelings overtake your body: tingling bliss from your orgasm, guilt from the reason for your orgasm, an overpowering yearning for the touch of essentially an entire stranger.

You strip the remainder of your clothes off and proceed to take a very long, very hot shower.

You wake up the next morning stupidly horny.

It didn’t help that you had a dream about Jihoon. In it, you were standing in his bedroom, watching him masturbate to the sight of you. His cries echoing through your subconscious, the pathetic look on this face as he came all over himself - it’s not surprising you woke up to a puddle between your legs.

You pause, listening to see if you can hear your neighbor next door, but you hear nothing. You reach into your nightstand, pulling out your favorite vibrator. The purple device rumbles in your hand as you turn it on. For a vibrator, it’s pretty quiet, but with your stupid thin walls you know it would be perfectly audible from the other side. You think Jihoon isn’t around - surely you would hear him if he were - but even if he is, you truly don’t even care anymore. You position the toy lightly upon your clit - even through the fabric of your underwear, its powerful vibrations instantly feel amazing. A soft groan escapes your lips before you can stop it. Your hips begin to move lightly at the stimulation - the pressure of the vibrator’s end causing your wetness to stick to your panties. You attempt to restrain your moaning, but before long you cease resisting. It feels too good. Your orgasm quickly builds in your gut, making you whimper as you squirm against your pillow, its intensity growing and growing until - you cum. The fire of your release burns through your body, your cries filling the air without abandon. Deep breaths fill your lungs as you come down, soft gasps emanating from your lips as you turn the toy off and toss it aside.

A series of thunks echo from through the wall, followed by a hushed “shit”.

It sounds like somebody dropping a phone or something, but whatever it is - turns out your neighbor was home after all. Whoops.

In your post-orgasm bliss you begin to drift back to sleep. You don’t know what you’re going to do now next time you run into Jihoon, but that’s a problem for later.

You end up sleeping in far too late. By the time you wake up, you feel groggy and sluggish, so you figure going to the gym will help you feel a little better. You don a soft pink pair of leggings and a light gray sports bra, filling your water bottle and grabbing your airpods on your way out the door. You wait in the hallway for the elevator. It reaches your floor with a ding, its doors sliding open to reveal who other than your next door neighbor.

Of fucking course.

He appears to be returning from the gym, his tight white t-shirt clinging to his body in a way that practically puts all his muscles on display. His dark hair is damp and sweaty, messy, stray strands of it sticking to his forehead. He looks up to see you standing there, a panicked look instantly filling his eyes. His skin is already flush from exercising, but his ears turn practically crimson at the sight of you.

“Hi,” you say with a friendly smile.

He freezes, staring at you like a deer caught in the headlights. He quickly tries to shake it off.

“Oh, uh, hey,” he mumbles in an attempted nonchalant tone, but already his cheeks are becoming more flustered. You see his eyes flicker up and down your body - your outfit isn’t terribly revealing, but it’s certainly on the sexier side of athleticwear. He stands there, awkwardly frozen - so long that the elevator door begins to shut again. He grabs hold of it, triggering the motion sensor so it reopens. He starts to shuffle past you, but you decide you’re feeling bold enough to try and engage him in a conversation.

“Just coming back from the gym?” you ask casually.

He stops in the hallway, standing right before you.

“Oh, yeah.”

“Do you also go to the one over on Clark Street?” you question. You won’t hold him up too long - he looks like he wants to perish - but you figure you’ll torment him for another minute or so. “That’s where I’m headed now.”

“Yeah, I do,” he answers, subtly shifting his gym bag in front of his body.

“Cool! Maybe we’ll see each other there sometime,” you tell him in a chipper tone.

“Maybe, yeah. That’d be cool,” he replies, smiling nervously.

You enter the elevator and press the ground floor button.

“Well, see ya around!” you tell him with a wave.

��You too,” he responds, not taking his eyes off you until the elevator door shuts closed.

Three days pass - three days of pure silence from the other side of the wall.

Now that Jihoon has discovered the truth, he's clearly mortified. You catch a few glimpses of him around the building, but the man practically vanishes at the sight of you. You feel a little bit bad, but you know the ruse could not have lasted forever anyway.

Unless he somehow knows exactly when you're not home and has been jacking off exclusively then, you haven't heard him pull his dick out at all. And judging by the couple times you've seen him, the man has been incredibly on edge.

You return home a bit late in the evening after hanging out with some friends. You’ve had a fair bit of wine, so you're feeling a little tipsy, but you're in a pleasantly good mood. You're also decently horny; your mind drifts to your neighbor, conjuring up the image of him returning from the gym, sweaty, muscular, his t-shirt damp and tightly fitted against his sculpted body.

Not two minutes pass after you step inside before you hear the SLAM of a door from the hallway. Footsteps approach your unit, followed by frantic knocking on your front door.

You scurry over to the entrance, reaching out to unlock the door, but the pit in your stomach makes you pause. What if he’s mad at you? you start to worry.

Well, only one way to find out.

With the click the deadbolt turns. You swing the door open to reveal Jihoon, in a plain white t-shirt and grey fucking sweatpants.

He stares at you, standing frozen in your doorway. You can see the gears turning in his head, trying to calculate if this is all a mistake.

After just enough moments of silence for it to be awkward, he clears his throat.

“Hi, um… May I come in?”

He looks incredibly tense, but the way he's staring at you with such intensity makes your pussy ache.

“Sure.”

You step aside, gesturing for him to come in.

He enters. He takes a look around as you shut the door behind him.

“It's really nice in here,” he comments, attempting to make small talk.

“Oh, thank you,” you say with a friendly smile. He looks even more nervous now that he's in your apartment. He pauses, nonchalantly observing some of the artwork on your wall, seemingly trying (and failing) to come up with a good segue into whatever he came over here to say.

“So, um…” he starts, rubbing his hands together anxiously.

“I just wanted to… uh… well, I figured I should probably let you know…”

You inch even closer to him as he stumbles over his words; his shoulders tense slightly. He runs one hand through his hair, avoiding your gaze.

“I guess I just wanted to apologize,” he finally is able to articulate. “I just recently realized that the walls in this building are pretty thin and uh… well I guess I don’t know if I've been loud at all…”

Blushed redness creeps up his neck as his terrible lying resonates through the room.

Maybe it's the way he's standing there, doing nothing but stumbling over his words yet looking incredibly sexy, or maybe it's the wine - but you're feeling bold today.

“Yeah, you have been.”

The pale color of his cheeks suddenly goes even paler, turning his entire face sheet-white as he stands there, horrified. Then, the redness returns with a vengeance. He looks like a very hot, very nervous tomato.

“I’m so sorry,” he stammers, “I really had no idea-”

“Why are you apologizing?”

He stares at you, confused.

“Um…”

He waits for you to clarify, but you don't. Seeing him this flustered up close and personal has your panties soaked already, and you want to revel in it.

He lets out a deep sigh.

“I just… I know I can be loud sometimes, but from now on I’ll be more conscientious of my… volume. And I just don't want you to think I’m perverted or anything…”

He shakes his head, realizing he's just digging himself a deeper hole at this point.

“Anyway, I’m really sorry to bother you, I should get going-”

He tries to slip past you, but you throw your arm out in front of him, slamming your palm into the wall of the narrow hallway as you block him from exiting. He freezes, involuntarily holding his breath as panic spreads across his face.

“What if I like it?”

Your arm brushes against his torso, his chest heaving into you with his quickening breaths.

“What?” he asks, barely more than a whisper, clearly taken aback by your question.

“What if I like hearing you?”

His eyes widen. You step even closer into his personal space, your face now mere inches from his.

“What if I want to hear you making those noises on this side of the wall, in my bed?”

You grasp onto his t-shirt, yanking his body into yours. He lets out a gasp as your tits press into his chest - his mouth is now so close to yours that you feel the exhale against your lips.

“Would you like that?”

He gazes at you, his eyes darkening with desire. Then - he kisses you.

It's not a delicate kiss, nor is it sweet. He kisses you as if he intends to devour you, hungrily tugging at your lips as he grasps at your waist fervorously, aching to touch every inch of you.

His large hands slip underneath your shirt, gripping your sides tight as he caresses your warm skin. Your heart races in your chest, the sounds of rushing blood flooding your ears as you kiss Jihoon, savoring the sweet taste of his lips, basking in the radiant heat of his body against yours.

“Oh wow,” he mutters into your mouth as his lips depart yours briefly.

You grasp onto his tshirt, balling the fabric in your fists, pulling him with you as you stumble toward your bedroom together, still kissing him.

As you step through the doorway, you tug on his shirt, prompting him to remove it. He pauses, contemplating the taste of wine lingering on your lips.

“Are you… drunk?” he asks delicately. “I just want to make sure…”

“A little,” you reply, leaning into him, so close that the vibrations of your soft-spoken words resonate against his lips.

“But I know what I want.”

Jihoon squeezes the flesh of your hips, his grip unrelentless, as if someone was going to take you away from him. A thick bulge beneath his sweatpants presses against you as he holds you tightly against him.

“And what do you want?” he asks in a low voice, staring at you hungrily. “Tell me.”

“First,” you start, pulling at his shirt again. “Get rid of this.”

He yanks his tshirt over his head, tossing it onto the floor. Standing before you now, shirtless, you get a true look at his brawny figure: huge biceps framing his body, thick pectorals protruding from his chest, chiseled abs sculpting his stomach. The man has muscles you didn’t even know existed. You delicately drag your fingertips up and down his torso, admiring him; his cock twitches against you at your touch.

“God you’re so fucking hot,” you mumble as you gaze into his eyes - giving him the most pathetic, needy, seductive look you can muster.

Redness spreads across his neck and chest. He’s clearly easily flustered (at least, for you), and you plan to take full advantage of this.

You slip one finger beneath the waistband of his sweatpants, tugging lightly.

“Now, get rid of these.”

Obediently, he slides his pants down, having to stretch the elastic further to get it over his bulge. Kicking the sweats off, you get a clearer look at what he’s packing. Even through the dark fabric of his underwear, the outline of his hard cock is undeniable - not only long, but thick. Your pussy clenches at the mere sight of his size.

You can't wait any longer. You run your hand over his clothed cock, feeling its weight in your palm. Jihoon groans, letting out the sweet sound you've until now only heard muffled through the wall. Hearing him now, here, in your bedroom - it's music to your ears.

Reaching into his underwear, you grip your hand around his girth - he nearly whimpers at the sensation. You give him a few strokes before pulling his cock fully out, causing you to let out an audible gasp.

Fucking shit.

Jihoon gives you an embarrassed smile, making you realize you said that out loud and not just in your head. But if anything your reaction wasn't even dramatic enough, because his cock is fucking huge. You take him in your fist, slowly pumping up and down; his eyes roll back into his head, letting out a deep sigh as you stroke him. You press your lips into his neck, planting delicate kisses into the soft skin.

“Oh god,” he groans under his breath.

With his dick twitching in your hand, growing stiff and somehow even longer, you drop to your knees, positioning your face directly beneath the behemoth of a cock. You gaze up at him as you drag your tongue from his base to his tip; he strokes your cheek lightly with the back of his fingers, gazing down at you with a look of equal parts admiration and lust. You swirl your tongue around the head, tasting the precum that has dribbled out. Taking just a tiny bit of his tip between puckered lips, you begin suckling on it, lapping up his juices and teasing him with the bare-minimum stimulation. His low hum swells into a moan as you slowly slide his cock into your mouth, taking as much of his length as possible before you start to choke (Not yet, you think to yourself. Save that for later.)

“Fuck, you look so good right now,” he groans, cupping your cheek in his large hand as you stare up at him with big doe eyes. “So beautiful with my cock in that pretty little mouth of yours.”

Sharp throbbing pulses between your legs at the slightest of praise. You slide your mouth up and down his length, gradually increasing your pace. His tip hitting the back of your mouth only makes you want more, makes you want to swallow him whole, gag on the entire shaft as his massive size fills your throat. Finally, you can resist no longer - you swallow the rest of him, your lips greeting his base as his full length slides down your throat. Tears instantly begin welling in your eyes, streaming down your cheeks as you bob your head up and down, choking on Jihoon’s cock.

He places one hand upon your hair, grasping it in his fist as you give him the absolute sloppiest head he’s ever received. Grotesque gagging sounds emanate from your throat, but are nearly drowned out by the lewd string of moans coming from Jihoon. He wants nothing more than to watch you choke on his cock, see your tears flowing freely as you stare up at him, eyes longingly transfixed upon each other - but he can’t help but shut his eyes, head falling back at the overwhelming pleasure you’re making him feel. It starts to take over his whole body - his hips reflexively begin thrusting, sinking his length deep into your throat. Before long he pulls you by the hair, wresting you off of him; strings of saliva stretch from his drenched cock to your coated lips, bubbles of spit running down your chin.

“Sorry, that was going to make me cum way too fast,” he tells you with a sheepish smile. “You’re just so- ohhh…” His sentence is cut off by you placing one of his balls in your mouth, lightly sucking on it before taking the other as well.

“Fuck that’s hot,” he grumbles, stroking your hair gently. You shift on your knees, trying to sit more comfortably upon the floor; Jihoon notices.

“Come here,” he instructs as he pulls you up off the floor. “I want you to be comfortable.”

He brings you over to the bed, laying down atop it. You go to resume your place between his legs, but he grabs your arms to stop you.

“You should take these off,” he insists, tugging at your clothes with desperation in his eyes. “Please. I wanna see you.”

You pull your shirt over your head, discarding it to the floor. Slowly you unfasten your pants, sliding them down your hips - a bit timidly, for as horny as you are right now you’re suddenly afflicted with a wave of shyness. But the way Jihoon is looking at you - eyes glazed over with pure lust, licking his lips like he wants to devour you - is driving you utterly crazy. You swiftly remove your bra and panties, standing nude before him as he marvels at the sight of you.

“You’re perfect,” he says, his voice deep and gravelly. Your pussy clenches, attempting to alleviate the powerful aching in your core. Jihoon takes your hand, drawing you into the side of the bed.

“Sit on my face. Please.”

It’s not an order; the way he is looking up at you, squeezing your hand - he’s begging.

“Only if I can suck your cock at the same time,” you say with a cheeky grin. His eyes widen.

“Would you like that?” you ask coyly, batting your eyelashes at him as you trace circles on his stomach with one fingernail.

“Y-yeah,” he whimpers, his voice cracking slightly.

“Good.”

You crawl onto the bed, swinging your legs over Jihoon’s head as you face his painfully erect cock. You situate yourself steadily, lowering your pussy toward his face, until you feel his soft, plush lips against you. Instantly he lets out a loud moan, the vibrations against your soaked core triggering a sharp jolt in your stomach. He wraps his arms around your inner thighs, holding you tight against him, his moans still resonating through the room even with his face buried in your cunt.

He begins to work his tongue deep into your folds, licking every last bit, lapping up as much of your juices as he possibly can - the rest certainly dripping down his chin. You lean over, reaching for his thick cock one more; you grip the base tight in your fist, stroking the hilt while taking the rest in your mouth, bobbing your head up and down his length. The pathetic noises coming from under your cunt grow even louder - Jihoon begins to squirm underneath you, bucking his hips as he continues eating you out as if the world were ending tomorrow. He latches onto your clit, suckling on the stimulated bud; you cry out, but the sound is garbled amidst your cacophony of unbridled gagging noises. Your eyes flood with tears as your orgasm rapidly approaches - you grind your hips on his face, stimulating your pussy further and further, the burning in your gut swelling and swelling, your legs trembling even in Jihoon’s tight embrace. Your whole body convulses atop of his as you reach your climax. Desperate for air, you pull your head up, your mouth now empty but quickly refilled with cries of pleasure as you cum all over Jihoon’s face.

“Oh my godddd,” you wail, your mind going blank as every nerve in your body lights up like fireworks.

“Oh my god, oh fuckkkk, Jihoon…”

The rumbling vibrations of his groaning carry you through an overpowering orgasm; you ride out your high as he sucks on your clit mercilessly while his nose presses into your cunt. You’re seeing stars as you begin to come down, unable to think any coherent thoughts - instead basking in how fucking incredible Jihoon just made you feel.

You lift your throbbing pussy off his face, giving your poor overstimulated clit a moment to recover.

“Gonna cum, ‘m so close,” Jihoon moans. You quickly pop his dick back into your mouth, sliding his length in and out, hollowing your cheeks as you suck his cock like your life depends on it.

“Ahh, ahhhhh, ah fuck-”

Hot white ropes shoot deep into your throat as he releases. His melodic moans and whining cries form a grand symphony that fills your bedroom - in this moment, you are absolutely certain that you've never heard a more beautiful sound.

His cock pulsates in your mouth, letting out every last spurt of cum for you to eagerly swallow. As he finishes, you slowly slide his cock out of your mouth - still marveling at the sheer size of it.

“Oh my god,” he groans softly. You swing your leg over his head, turning yourself around to lay beside him. You wrap your arms around his torso, becoming the big spoon as you nuzzle your face into his neck.

“Wow,” he proclaims with a deep, satisfied exhale. He lays silently as he recovers, catching his breath and coming back down to earth. Finally, with a sigh, he turns to face you. You raise your head up enough for your noses to meet.

Jihoon gazes into your eyes, eyelids heavy in his post-orgasmic bliss. He hesitates, bringing his hand up to your cheek and cradling it gently.

“Can I kiss you?” he finally asks, his voice no more than a soft whisper.

You nod. He kisses you - this time not hungry and desperate, but slow and saccharine. Your lips lock, laying there entangled in each other’s embrace - his muscular arms hold you tight, enveloping you in the warmth radiating from both of your sweat-covered bodies. As your lips eventually part, you remain snuggled by his side - him playing with your hair while you trace your fingertips over his toned body. Eventually, he takes your chin delicately in his hand, tilting your face up to look at him.

“I don’t know if fucking your next door neighbor is necessarily a wise thing to do,” he starts. “But that was incredible. You’re incredible.”

You smile.

“I don't know either,” you chuckle. “But the way you basically broke down my door to come fuck me was really hot.”

Jihoon laughs, his face lighting up with a beaming smile.

“Yeah, um. I'm not entirely sure what compelled me to do that.”

“I do,” you inform him. “You were thinking with your dick.”

“Okay yeah, you're right,” he admits with a grin.

He reaches for your hand, interlacing his fingers with yours, squeezing your palm.

“Would you want to do this again?”

“Like, right now?” you reply.

“No I mean like- … well, yes actually,” he answers, his face lighting up with excitement. “But I meant like, in the future.”

You nod, a wide grin spreading across your face.

“I’d like that.”

“Good,” he smiles. “Me too.”

“But also…”

Your arms grab hold of him, rolling him over on top of you. He tries to shift, to not be placing his whole weight upon you, but you cling to him tightly, holding him in place. You roll your hips, stroking his still half-erect cock with your soaked cunt; you feel it pulse in response, already beginning to harden again.

“I want you to fuck me,” you speak softly into his ear, continuing to grind your pussy on his cock. His eyes roll back in his head once more.

“God you're so fucking hot,” he mumbles through gritted teeth. His eyelashes flutter as his eyes open again, peering down at you amorously.

“Give me just a minute, baby,” he says as he shifts downward, positioning himself directly in front of your boobs. He grabs one with each hand, kneading the soft flesh in his grasp. He licks your nipple, swirling his tongue around the protruding bud, wetting it with his warm mouth before switching to your other breast. He gives them equal attention, licking and sucking on them, back and forth - whichever boob isn't in his mouth, he pinches your hard nipple, squeezing and rolling it between his thumb and forefinger. You press your hips up into his stomach, seeking any relief for your aching clit, but it's not enough. You whimper as he latches on to your left nipple, suckling on it so long you think you might cum again just from this. You feel the bed move beneath you as he grinds his cock against the sheets, thrusting into the mattress, seeking relief for his returned erection.

He lifts his head up, releasing his latch on your breast with a wet-sounding pop. His eyes stay fixed on you as he shifts further down the bed, resting comfortably between your legs as his lips hover above your cunt.

“Is this okay?” he checks before placing his mouth on you. You nod earnestly, brushing your fingers through his damp, messy hair. His tongue locates your entrance, slipping into your pussy, his nose brushing up against your clit, still highly sensitive from your first orgasm. You moan as his tongue glides through your folds, his face becoming soaked once again in your juices. He flickers over your clit, the warmth and wetness of his tongue quickly sending you over the edge. Your body writhes beneath him as you cum a second time, crying out with even greater pleasure than the first. It's almost overbearing, but you relish in it, delicious waves of bliss pulsating throughout your whole being. His tongue slows, licking you softly as you lay there, unable to move for a few good minutes, basking in the aftermath of your orgasm. Your fist slowly unclenches, releasing the grip you didn't realize you had on his tousled locks.

“Damn,” you mumble, a big goofy grin spreading across your face. Jihoon crawls back up toward you, kissing you with lips drenched in your own cum. His cock, fully hard once more, brushes against your cunt. Although you're still trying to catch your breath, you place your entrance against his tip to taunt him.

“Please fuck me,” you beg, desperate to feel him inside you.

He pushes his cockhead into your pussy, letting out a moan as he feels your warmth. Your walls tighten as he slides the rest of his length in, fully enveloping his cock - he whines, loudly, letting the delicious sensation overtake him. He rests for a moment inside you, fearing to move as he feels the urge to cum already. But he’s too aroused to resist for much longer - slowly he begins to pump into you, deep thrusts stretching you out, filling you up like you've never felt before. He’s almost too big, but you love it. Tears well in your eyes again as he fucks you - slow and tender at first, but gradually increasing his pace, soon pounding into you with powerful force. The stretch is overwhelming, but his long strokes and perfect tempo have you screaming his name, voluminous cries filling the air as he fucks you like you’ve never been fucked before.

“You’re taking me so well baby,” he praises, his voice low and breathy. “So pretty…”

His voice trails off. High-pitched grunts and groans escape him as his body begins to stiffen, another climax rapidly on its way. He drives his cock into you, your perfect pussy squeezing him so tight that he can't think straight.

“Y/n…” he cries. “Fuck, y/n I'm cumming…”

With several powerful thrusts he releases deep inside you, warm cum filling you up until you're completely full - so full that it begins to leak out of you, coating his cock and dripping all over the sheets. He finishes, laying frozen on top of you, heaving breaths echoing in your ear as he sinks his face into the crook of your neck. His cock rests inside you still, twitching occasionally against your walls. His breathing becomes so steady that you start to think he’s fallen asleep - but eventually he lifts his head, resting his temple on his fist as he takes in the sight of you, so pretty and fucked out beneath him. A lazy smile appears on his face as he stares at you, his pink cheeks glowing in his post-orgasm state. He looks so good that you involuntarily let out a little giggle.

“What?” he asks, his grin growing wider.

“You're just really hot, that's all.”

His face somehow turns even rosier. He lets out an embarrassed tsk as he tries to hide his face in his hands.

“What? You are!!” you proclaim, pulling his hands away so you can see him again.

“Sorry,” he replies timidly. “I’m not good with compliments.”

“You'll get used to it,” you say matter-of-factly. He raises an eyebrow at you.

“You say that like this is going to be a regular thing now,” he retorts, trying to keep a straight face - but the corners of his mouth twitch upward, revealing the grin he's trying to hold back.

“Do you want it to be?” you ask.

Unable to hide his smile any longer, he nods.

“I’d like that.”

Slowly, he pulls his spent cock out of you, making you whine at the empty sensation as even more of his cum spills out of you.

“Wait here,” he says, giving you a soft kiss on your cheek as he rises from the bed. “Let’s get you cleaned up.”

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mohammedyusri-blog · 2 years ago

Link

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eriochromatic · 1 year ago

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Your impel down modern au is absolutely amazing is it okay to ask more about it ?

Like is Jinbei the legal guardian or is Garp around ? Is the Sabo situation like in canon?

What about the warden is he like the landlord ?

(If I ever get inspiration/time would you be down for this to be a fic ?)

Thank u for liking my AU! To be completely honest I intentionally didn’t add other one piece characters since I wanted to explore a different dynamic, so in this AU, Garp (or Shanks or Whitebeard for that matter) wouldn’t be around too much, Sabo also probably wouldn't be too present.

For this AU specifically, the influential parental figures around Luffy and Ace are Jinbei (legal guardian), and then Crocodile (takes care of them when Jinbei is busy), and then the rest of the apartment residents when both Jinbei and Croc are occupied. The only other one piece chara I might consider adding in is Magellan as the landlord, but he’d be pretty hands off and not really part of the main dynamic anyways.

And of course, feel free to turn this into a fic if you’re feeling inspired! To be completely honest this AU in itself was inspired by a fic from a completely different fandom where they took a bunch of characters who never interacted w/ each other and put them all in an apartment together for a modern AU; Oda already did the job of getting random characters to work together so I just wanted to do the modern AU part!

Certain headcanons that I wasn’t able to add in the post itself:

Jinbei is a highschool teacher! The area they live in isn’t well funded so he probably doubles up as their guidance counselor as well,, he’s super busy which is why the rest of the apartment complex all collectively helps out watching the kids

Crocodile’s income bracket is technically a few steps above the others but because he’s paying 3 apartments worth of rent his quality of life ends up around the same LOL technically he could always move out but he’s too attached to everyone (would never admit it)

Drag race is still rupaul’s show in this universe and not Ivankov’s HAHAHA Ivankov is definitely more of an underground queen, almost urban legend like… But yeah they’re never home much so Inazuma has been using Ivankov’s apartment as a glorified storage unit for fabrics and outfits

Ace is still the grumpy kid like in canon, but having Crocodile around as a vaguely bad influence (“I am not going to stop you from committing violence” type) makes them strangely close… Croc is trans in this AU and if u wanted Ace to also be trans that can be another bonding point

Since Crocodile manages a casino (with a nightclub), Bentham has been pestering Croc to let him put on a drag show, so far Croc has been saying said no. Croc’s frame of reference is Ivankov (aka someone who’s waaaay to good) so unfortunately anyone who’s not at Ivankov’s level isn’t worth the effort of changing schedules and reorganizing things. Bentham has seen Crocodile proposition Daz constantly for that bouncer job so now there’s this weird one sided rivalry between Bentham and Daz lol

that’s about all the ideas I have for now! hope that was fun and interesting to read!

#erio stuff

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helly-watermelonsmellinfellon · 2 years ago

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Housed For Now!

[New]

AS OF DECEMBER 20TH, 2023, WE HAVE BEEN INFORMED THAT OUR NEW LANDLADY WANTS US OUT WHEN OUR LEASE ENDS IN FENBRUARY. EDIT Dec 27th 2023: We just learned that she's adding an electric garage door to the garage. Her ex-husband is working on it with an electrician friend of his and I overheard them. She doesn't intend to move in, she wants to add the small ass garage onto the lease and thinks it's worth adding another $1K+ dollars to the rent.

[Old]

Dave just doesn't get how finances work. Because he's so unhelpful and doesn't fucking listen when people speak, he's whining about how after getting paid, mom has nothing left for the month. "But we don't have to spend $230 on the storage unit anymore!" "That went into other bills, Dave!" He thinks that cuz we don't have that one issue holding us down, we're going to be able to handle everything else easily and have money left over for whatever he wants to waste it on. Because mom has had to pay one bill and let another slide as a result every month. It's how she's had to handle our financial problems this entire time. And people all over have to do things like this, it isn't a new tactic.

Mom finally paid off the bank after Dave bounced her account several times last year. She's been paying $100+ a month for ages to get that handled. That should make things a little easier now.

The car insurance has increased by several dozen dollars so it's over $150 a month now. (EDIT: Dec, 2023: It was increased again.)

Her phone and Bethy's phone have to be kept on because of her schooling and we need a functioning phone number or else we'll be in big trouble in many ways. $100+ just for 2 phones. Dave is in charge of his own damn phone.

She has to handle her Discover and Capital One cards since she's had to use them to save our asses a few times. She NEEDS to pay them off so her credit score doesn't tank, and many places won't give you a chance if your credit is low. She's got monthly payments for those around $100+ in total.

The P.O. Box price has increased. Almost $50 now. (EDIT: Dec, 2023: We had canceled it since we finally got a place to live, and now we'll need to get a new one. I'm so tired.)

Dish Network has been on pause or almost 2 years cuz she can't cancel it before the full year she paid is used up or the fee is astronomical. They keep suspiciously unpausing it and trying to lob thousands in fees at us. (EDIT: Aug, 2023: Mom finally got it taken care of by going to the Better Business Bureau with dozens of emails of proof for her case and they came down hard on Dish Network. So we're fine on that front now.)

Then we have gas for a minivan, that Dave should be paying for, but isn't. A mostly full tank is around $80 every 4-5 days. Gas is average rn. So over $400 monthly in gas. (EDIT Dec, 2023: $20 gets 4 1/2 Gallons right now. It is hell.)

We need the part for the van which is $800+. The van is just so old that finding parts for something considered an antique now is damn near impossible, and not having the money up front makes it worse. (EDIT: Dec, 2023: The van is dead and despite how the alternator was replaced and the battery and starter are fine, there's no vehicle.)

She has to pay for her medication cuz we have shit medical. She's already going without many of them but some health problems, like Asthma, can't be ignored so the inhalers are prioritized. (EDIT Aug, 2023: Our medical changed out of nowhere at the beginning of the year and all of our doctors no longer take it. No doctors take it, in fact, so our attempts to get better help have to start all over again.)

Bethy needs school supplies regularly.

But Dave just thinks that she should have all this extra money left over at the end of paying everything off. Many of these things come out instantly on the 1st of each month btw. She has to then work through what is left for the bills that aren't instantly paid off. He thinks if he works with his friend for 3 weeks, he'll have enough money for an apartment, completely ignoring that he'd only have about $1800 for a full month of work with no breaks. The cheapest 2-bedroom in Delaware requires almost all of that, which is why we're waiting on housing which charges based on your monthly income. Even if he handled the monthly rent of $1400-$1700 for a 2-bedroom, mom still has all this stuff to worry about... and then gas, water, electric, sewage, etc... Dave doesn't listen. In public housing, those things are included. Outside it, they are separate expenses.

Other Posts About Life:

[1] [2][3] [4] [5]

~.O.~

[Ko-Fi]

[GoFundMe]

[Venmo]

[CashApp: $Flame818]

[Amazon Food List]

[Amazon Christmas List]

[Meal Train]

[Patreon]

[NEW Dec, 2023]

I was right to keep on my toes about this. Dave does not read or pay attention and he just rushes into things without thinking. He's made every excuse possible to defend this lady saying she'll see how clean the house is a let us stay, but when she made a point to say she's thinking of moving in here, she isn't looking for a ruined house. She already has the reason for why she wants us out and she put it in writing, and it's because she claims to want to live here now. She doesn't need any other reason; she owns the property and that is good enough.

So, we have to be out by mid-February, which means more moving. And we just have no money and nowhere to go.

[NEWER Mar, 2024]

We need food, heat, hot water, etc... and Dave's getting scammed by a blackmailer that he's now given over $3K to... His dumbass was cheating, as he always does, and within a few conversations felt safe enough to tell this bitch all his personal business, as well as everything about his kids and grandkids. And now, cuz he offended her, she did a search on him and found his family and is how holding them over his head to Apple gift cards.

Yet he stomps in the house every day demanding to know if anyone 'gave us money'. And then got mad when mom finally snapped at him with, "No, actually Helen has gotten any commissions this month, so there's nothing in the PayPal." All cuz Dave doesn't want to admit that I've brought $16K in just through commissions alone.

#poverty #homelessness #gofundme #ko-fi #watermelonsmellinfellon

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thekinkyleopard · 1 year ago

Text

Move-in Day

A Sven and Elex Canon Snz Fic

⚠️Content Warning⚠️

Snz Fet, Smut, Slight Domestic Bullying, Bj

Author’s Notes: I wanted to write something before October of the new boys 🥹 @aller-geez did the art and owns Sven!

Description: The boys are finally moving in together which is going to come with quite a few challenges. Such as boundaries. Something Elex struggles greatly with as he realizes his boyfriend can no longer hide his secret.

“Yo, 7! Where the fuck am I putting these boxes at? And why, or more so, HOW DO YOU HAVE SO MUCH SHIT?!” Elex exploded over the mountain of packed objects he carried through the threshold of their new rented home.

“Just set them in the living room, Lex…I gotta arrange this bathroom real quick…” the cat sounded distant, lost in his current task of getting their home looking like a home. “Also, you’re lucky I have all this shit or else we’d be sitting on lawn chairs watching some bunk ass TV you found on the side of the street,”

“Hey! I’m resourceful, and it’s handy, don’t act like it’s an inconvenience now,” rolling his two toned eyes. The grumpier of the two finally walked through the abode and set the large boxes down with a THUD. “Okay, so there’s this shitload in here and still 48 more shitloads in the truck..how the fuck do you expect to fit all this stuff? Where the fuck were you keeping it all??” The green haired mongrel looked about the small space of their two bedroom one and a half bath home.

“I had a storage unit, and decided to collect home decor the second I started getting a paycheck,” Sven now came walking out of the bathroom, fiddling his hands with some sort of plastic between them. “I figured I was going to need stuff if I was to inherit the family business…til Drae got adopted,” rolling his orange slitted eyes as he now stood in front of his grouchy boyfriend. “You’re welcome,” he stuck his tongue out at the other who swiftly grabbed it in between his index and thumb, giving the organ a light kiss before releasing it. “Hey!” Sven lapped his tongue and tried to remove the taste of Elex’s salty fingers.

“Yeah, yeah, you’re not the one fuckin’ luggin’ it all in here!” Snickering at his own cheeky behavior, and the other’s narrowed eye response.

“Go grab the rest of the shit tons you cretin,” snorting a bit through his nose, truthfully in hopes the man would skitter away faster because truthfully he could feel, deep within his sinuses, it was coming. He forgot to take his allergy meds, in all actuality, he packed them. That’s why he was unpacking the bathroom first. Yet, it seemed, he did not pack them according to his memory so he thought. Which means his allergy medication was floating somewhere in the several boxes he had recently packed. He sighed deeply.

“Why are you so antsy today? Like there’s a fire under your ass, chill,” Els looked the cat up and down almost worried he may explode into flames.

“Can you please just go get the other fucking boxes?!” Sven finally cracked, it was any minute before he started up, and he wasn’t ready. He wasn’t ready for Elex to see him actually sneeze without it somehow being stuffed behind something or completely swallowed back.

“Alright! Fuck! Someone’s on their Fuckin’ period,” the badger scoffed before taking his apparently needed exit, grumbling the whole way as he did so. He was alone. Sven looked around and quickly fell into disarray. He outwardly sighed and allowed himself to feel like he was full of rocks. Body visibly slumped from his perfect posture. The second he did, there it was, having been waiting in the dark depths of his allergetic sinuses. His nose began to twitch, and as he scrunched it back and forth…a sneeze came shooting out.

“H-!! H’Tshhkt!” He shook his head back and forth, puffs of spray hitting the air as he almost looked like he was fighting off a ghost. Hands flailing. “Ktch! N’GSH!” He groaned swiping at his nose with the sleeve of his white button up. “Stupid…N’GT! Allergies…H’tshh!!” He continued as he scrambled around the home full of boxes for anything he could use. “Bathroom!” He quickly shouted running back towards the area, snagging a string of toilet paper off the roll he’d set up. “Thank god…” he mumbled before blowing his nose, roughly, violently, with real purpose. He wanted not a single drop left when he was finished. He rubbed at his nose so adamantly there was a gentle clicking sound emitting from the area. Unbeknownst to him, Elex had re-entered the home, with another armful of boxes, muttering about heavy useless garbage, why not get stuff at the dollar tree. Sven’s head snapped to the bathroom door and he quickly shut it with panic. Locking the knob.

Elex sat the boxes down and at the same moment, heard the bathroom door click, as it were being secured. “Sven?” He called out curiously, his head tilted to the right as he walked towards the bathroom now. “…Sven??” Starting to feel a bit worried his voice picking up to that of slight panic. His boyfriend wasn’t the silent type, and he knew the badger was nosey, so typically calling for him would have triggered some sort of response in update. Yet there was nothing. Elex furrowed his brows and stepped forward to jiggle the knob.

From the other side Sven sat up against the wall, fighting for his life. ‘Fuuuuuck why are you so nosey Elex ?!’ He screamed internally as his body worked against him. “I’m uh…” he called out trying to speak without interruption. “I’m..Nn..trying to shit…do you..KT! … mind?!”coming up with something he seemingly found less embarrassing than sneezing…..shitting? He panicked. Wiping desperately at his nose in hopes it would keep it settled.

“Uh…k my fuckin’ bad,” Lex held up his hands defensively and smoothly turned from the door to give his partner some privacy. He plopped himself down onto..well…one of the sturdier boxes, and started scrolling through his media news feed. Every so often snorting a chuckle through his nostrils. He could be shoveling in more boxes, but why would he do that right now?

Sven gasped for air as he finally realized Elex was no longer standing by the doorway. He grabbed a handful of toilet paper and formed a perfect little nest, because he was surely going to need it. He huffed, hitched and his watering orange eyes rolled into the back of his head before he blew his mess into the handful of paper. “Hh’gsch!! K’GNSH!” Though his sneezes were relatively quiet, not too much to be bothered by the average listener, Elex just barely heard the whispering end of it. He looked up from his phone. The man was a walking question mark symbol as he slowly got up from where he sat and quietly crept closer to the door. “H’tshhkt!! Hppt’CH!” Sven tried muffling them into the now dampening piece of mulched tree, but unfortunately for him, the sound traveled quite fluently in this new home.

Elex was standing at the door, ear pressed tightly against it with one palm flattened beside him to keep him steady, his darkened patchy skin, illuminated a bright pink. Sven was sneezing? Openly? Without him?! Clearly the cat was trying to hide it…but why? What was he so ashamed of? Frankly…his little sounds were quite delightful. He bit his lip before listening in for more.

“Fuck…Nkch! Ngt’ch!! KTCH! Pleeeease…” he tried to reason with the universe to allow him just a smidge of freedom from this darkened, evil curse. This was supposed to be a blissful day. He was supposed to enjoy this new found independence and be able to enjoy his new life with his boyfriend. Not held up in the bathroom sneezing his brains out of his ears. “Hh’gsch!! Hptt’CHHH!”

Elex couldn’t stand it anymore by this point, so he pulled his head back and gently knocked again. “Sven? Come on puss, why you still in there?”

“Go away Lex! I can’t let you…H’GNXT! see me like this…” stifling into his hand, long abandoning the soiled tissue. He couldn’t allow Elex to see him this way, he couldn’t! It was humiliating! The opposite of manly! He couldn’t do it.

“Babe…seriously just open the door,” The badger began to grow impatient. “You either open it, or I knock it the fuck down, pick your poison cause this hiding secrets shit isn’t going to fly with me,” now feeling a bit more grudgeful. Why was the man acting like this? Reserved and hidden? He was usually so passionate and proud! An open book almost, but this was starting to concern the green haired male.

“No! You’re going to laugh at me…” a muffled, insecure voice was heard through the thin wood of the bathroom door. It almost made the Badger soften, almost. That wasn’t like him though.

“Barker, I’ll take ‘Things That’ll Never Fuckin Happen’ for 800 please…Puss, open the damn door,” trying to reason with the other by sprinkling in some light humor, his knuckles still tapping against the wooden material. Eventually, the green haired male heard the click of the lock and the door came slowly creeping open. “Puss?” He called open from his position, before sneaking his head in first.

He saw Sven a mess on the ground, sniveling and sniffing as he rubbed his reddened nostrils, clearly having been fighting a battle in here, surrounded by discarded tissues. “Don’t look at me..” he whimpered with his head hanging low, the loose strands of his aqua hair hiding the disdain behind those glossy orange orbs.

“Oh Puss…” he chuckled shaking his head back and forth, taking a seat next to the smaller. “You sick?” He asked curiously, placing a flat hand on the other’s back and rubbing him lovingly.

“No…I can’t find my Allergy medication…” Sven sighed pitifully, shaking his head slowly back and forth, hugging his knees as he tried his best to starve off what was surely inevitably coming back for more.

“You have allergies too?” Els turned his head, cocking his pierced green brow with curiosity. Surely, he knew the other had some allergens but, so severe? No wonder he never noticed if he was always on meds or stifling….

“Yeah…myself…I’m allergic to MYSELF! K’TCHH!” His face fully vermillion now as he sneezed into the crook of his elbow, trying to avoid a mess across the two of them. Ashamed and embarrassed by his very existence.

“Oh babe…” Elex clicked his tongue and ran his once back rubbing hand, now through the strands of soft colored hair. “What can I do?”

“Not perceive me..SNNDDFF…Nkch!” The quick sniffle to clear his sinuses only made it infinitely worse as he twisted his nose in large circles across his face, then scrunching it with vicious fervor. “Ktch! K’GNSH!”

“Well, that ship has long fuckin’ sailed my face exploding lover, but I can at the very least offer you a distraction,” now bringing both his hands up to massage each of Sven’s shoulders, causing the Cheshire to relax a bit under the touch, his tension slowly melting under Elex’s hands.

“What do you…K’GTCH! Have in mind?” Forcing it out into the palms of his hands as he tried to stay intrigued and engaged within the conversation with Lex, who in turn couldn’t wipe the brightened blushing red hue off his own cheeks.

“Oh you know…” trailing his hand down the front of his boyfriend’s chest, he stopped at his audibly clinky belt, fiddling with the mechanics as he leaned closer into Sven’s soft, orange cat ear. “Suck you senseless?” Starting to work the main belt pieces loose, as it clanked open swiftly with expertise.

“Ng…I might..h’…might quite..nkcht! Enjoy that…actually…sndf,” struggling to make it through his sentence as he grabbed another load off the toilet paper roll, finding it almost needing replacement yet again. Jesus.

Elex licking his lips and swiftly began chewing on his lower lip ring. “I honestly don’t know why you were hiding those sounds from me Sevvy~ I reeeeaaallly enjoy them…” already working his partner’s belt loose from his pants as he slid it out completely and tossed it to the side of the bathroom. “I find it actually…”

“KTCH!” Sven couldn’t hold back another, snapping his hand back up to his face to cover himself, he blushed brightly, his crying eyes now looking over to make contact with Elex’s hungry glare. Whom was bringing his hand back to his mouth.

“Mmm, fairly selfish, that you would hide such an arousing fact about yourself….” Spitting into his palm with a lustful force that made the cat swallow harshly.

“A-Arousing? What are y-you even talking about…Hh’GSCH!” Humbled again, his body shook with the force against the side of Elex’s body, that now hovered him.

“I think you know…Stud,” diving his newly dampened hand into the hem of Sven’s boxers, and taking hold of the other’s hard cock now, Els continued to chew his piercing.

“N-Nuh…uh! Aah~” the aqua haired man tried to argue but it was no use as his pleasure receptors began to buzz and vibrate within his entire body, feeling his boyfriend’s slick hot hand now working his awakening length.

“You’re so shy?? For what reason my strong, handsome, pussy cat? It’s just me…” Lex’s hand twisted expertly, knowing all the right spots to make his normally in charge boyfriend, purr. Els squeezing with lustful power as his digits worked to please him.

“Y-You’re so Lu-lucky I can…t…Hnn..K’gnsh!!” Falling back against the wall, his hair fell beside him, sticking to his slowly dampening temples as his sneezes continued to make him jolt and spray. His nose relentlessly leaked despite how many times he swiped and rubbed at it with the dryer sides of his handful of paper.

“Can’t wait? Toss me around and stick it up my ass? Treat me like the slut I deserve to be?” Snickering lightly into the other’s ear before nipping it playfully, his thumb dipping and teasing at Sven’s aching head.

“Elex…” he moaned loosely, sniffling with soft reserve as his eyes shut tightly. “…Jesus do something with that dirty fucking mouth besides talk shit hm? Sndfff,” snorting back a sneeze, some congestion and a whole lot of vulnerability, Sven took a fistful of Elex’s hair now and dragged him to the space between his legs. “If you’re gonna…hptt’ch!” Using his free hand to brush the leaking fluids from his face. “Be about sucking my dick, then be about it…you foul mouthed whore,” his wet orange gaze now snapped open and narrowed down at the taller of the two, who blinked several times with his multi colored gaze before a devious smirk slid across his lips.

“My pleasure, boss,” settling comfortably between Sven’s thighs, the Badger slowly pulled the cat from behind a wall of boxer and forced open pants. Face to face with it, the green haired man shivered in anticipation, sticking his split pierced tongue out he wrapped it delicately around the head, slipping each side up and down, opposite of each other. This caused the cat to gasp loudly, his grip on the forest locks only tightening.

“Shiiiit…” the warm metal balls rubbing and teasing the ridges of his head was almost enough of a distraction to keep his allergies at bay, but almost doesn’t pay the bills. “K’tchh! Ngt’chh!” Using his free hand like a tissue, though it was already pretty used up and clammy by now, it was all he had. The toilet paper was inconveniently out of reach now. The sounds and scene of his feline boyfriend blowing out, only fueled the naughty badger even more as he spoke once.

“Don’t stop doing that…” Elex now swallowed Sven’s length in one swoop after his plea, slipping the large cock furthest down his throat he could. Taking his right hand he began to fish it inside his own jeans, needing to release at the sight of this. A special occasion, a new secret unlocked. Everyday he learned more and more about the elusive cat and it only drove him further in love with the asshole. His tongue, caressed and hugged around the cat’s length in a whole new way no other without a surgery like his could. It was almost one Sven’s most favorite things about the slightly younger, beside his overall personality. He liked his boys a little, spicy. Sven would loosen his grip upon the other’s hair only to tighten it back up the second his cock would hit the back of his throat.

“H’h…aah~ nn..El…H’tshhkt!! Nkch! Ngsh!” The older of the two cried out gently, his small explosive light sneezes dusting and decorating the space now between them. Cascading down onto Elex’s face causing the badger to moan around the other’s thick length. “I’m-..so…H’NgXt! Nnch! Hah…close…” fighting to at least finish the thought while his eyes rolled into the back of his head. Elex sucking purely on his tip before pushing down again. The taller’s head continued to bob gracefully, each side of his tongue working over time to massage and press at every individual dip and vein. His hand pumping quickly at his own leaking, needy member.

As each second passed, with Elex’s mouth on his cock, and the new found freedom that the other was less than a bully about this exposed secret, his groin tightened. “Elex…” he groaned his lover’s name, pushing his head with each downward suck, he couldn’t take it anymore. The badger was simply too fucking good at pleasing him. His back straightened against the wall and he threw his head up with existential pleasure. Sven came, hard inside the other’s working mouth. His hips stuttered and he forcibly shoved Lex’s throat down almost drowning the other in his explosive seed.

No matter the difference. Els swallowed every drop as his own shaking fist began to stagger and suffer. Trying to keep pace but finding himself lost in ecstasy and before long his efforts were just enough to send him over the edge, filling his boxers with cum. “Fucking shit….” He hissed plopping Sven’s cock from his mouth as a thin white line of fluid dribbling down his chin now. Sven chuckled, watching his mate in the throes of an intense orgasm, he reached over with his thumb and swiped the line of cum from the other’s face. He held his hand there for a moment , caressing the other’s discolored cheek, while Elex tried to catch his breath.

“Sndfff…Thanks…” he huffed, out of breath between the allergy attack and his lover’s mouth.

“For the blowjob? No problem,” chuckling playfully as El now too sat back, but against the lower cabinet of their sink.

“No…for not making fun of me,” he shrugged. “I know it’s one of your favorite past times but…this time it meant a lot that you didn’t,” Sven smiled over at the badger who met him with a cocky grin and a roll of his duo colored eyes.

“Hey I might be an asshole, but I can read a room…plus…you’ve grown on me through the years…I can’t make you wanna kill yourself ALL THE TIME…” chuckling loosely before reaching over and lightly gripping the other’s chin lovingly before letting go.

“Touché…” the cat responded with a carefree smirk and a quick reach to grip, and hold onto Elex’s hand.

“I love ya, Puss, stop keeping secrets, alright?” The badger said softly, his thumb rubbing over the top of Sven’s embracing hand.

“Yeah, alright. I love ya too, kid,” his orange eyes sparkled with slight mischief but overall love for the bratty male.

“Don’t fuckin call me that,” his green and brown eyes shifted to a narrow glare, sizing the other up now and ripping his hand away from Sven’s loving grasp.

“I’ve told you several times to stop calling me puss,” the Cheshire shrugged almost unphased by this sudden mood swing the other was having, since he was always having one.

“Puss is cute! You’re a cat! Kid is fuckin’ weird…makes me feel less manly, stop it,” pouting now, folding his arms across his chest he certainly fit the description more than ever now. It was more or less not helping his case.

“Whatever you say, kid,” shifting slightly the badger jerked forward and slugged the cat in his arm, hard, no holding back, he did not care and there would surely be a bruise the next day. “Ow! You god damn animal!” His voice said stern but his facial expression said bring it, always ready for some rowdy action.

“Yeah well, maybe it’ll teach you to listen! Dick for brains!” Sticking his tongue out with defiance, Elex continued to uphold his protests, folding his arms back up over his chest.

“Zip it, you neanderthal, and get up…help me find my damn meds…Sndfff…” Sven snuffled loudly again and finally began to lift himself off the bathroom floor, extending a hand out to his partner, offering help but was met with a very stubborn badger.

“Maybe I don’t want to…I’ll have you sneezing all over this house for my personal enjoyment,” turning his head swiftly away to avoid looking at his boyfriend, still pouting, crossed up and avoidant.

“There really is something mentally wrong with you,” bringing his hand back in, Sven now also crossed his arms over his chest and slowly shook his head at the very bratty man on the floor in front of him.

“Yes, but you knew this, and still chose to go out with me, so what’s that say about you? Huh Einstein?” Sharply turning his head back to deliver his final argument it actually made the cat shrug his shoulders and nod his head in agreement.

“You make a sincerely valid point, now please help me unpack all this shit…” again, the cat unfolded his arms and reached a hand out to offer, one more time, his mate a lift back up to solid footing.

“That’s better, a please never hurt no one,” finally, Elex took the offering of the cat’s hand, and connected their palms in a hitch. The shorter of the two promptly pulling himself up on to his feet again. Elex subconsciously began to wipe down his pants and wash his hands.

“I fear I may have made a mistake moving in with you….” Looking the other up and down, he sincerely was starting to question whether or not he made a good choice. He did after all move in with an unhinged criminal that he often stood toe to toe with many times through out their childhood together. This surely, was going to be a rollercoaster ride.

The End

Author’s Notes: What better way to break in the new couple than some smutty snz action. I hope you all enjoyed the new OCs and their sexy, slightly abusive and toxic dynamic. 🫠🫠🫠 I’m sorry y’all we needed something with a bit more umpf. Elex is so BabyGirl 🤭🤭 he just won’t ever admit it 🤪

#original character #oc #writer #fic writer #snz kink #snzblr #art #smut #my character #Elex Parker #Sven #snz things #snz #snz fet #snzfucker #snzzzzz #snzfic #sneeze kink #snz ocs #snzfet

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queer-crip-grows · 1 year ago

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Right-to-buy council houses without specifically only releasing housing that already had a replacement built was of the most notable ways of the *many* that Thatcher et al screwed the UK.

I’d love to have a law put in place that landlords either have to sign contracts to provide housing under council house-type contracts with rent controls to people on housing benefit etc, or sell to the local council at compulsory purchase prices.

Same for all the houses not being lived in - use to house people under contractual controls, or have to sell to the council housing central fund.

Personally I’d start converting all the office units that are no longer needed because so many people are working remotely now into housing too.

Same for the huge city centre shops - I’m not sure if the pattern repeats elsewhere, but I live near Glasgow and the city centre has basically died since Covid. No one is renting the huge retail stores and the place is full of unhoused folk, which is a fucking scandal. So convert them into housing; let the buildings see use, and let those folks get off the streets. Pets and kids specifically allowed too - get families out of one-room shelters and into proper homes of their own.

I’ve heard that there would be issues putting in water infrastructure, but given the place is literally crumbling already and usage in so many areas is so low that having workers digging up the streets to install water lines wouldn’t cause enormous disruption, the time to do this is *now*. Build rainwater catchment and purification systems on roofs too - we get so much rain in the UK it’s kind of ridiculous not to use it! Some of that could go directly to drip irrigation in gardens, but plenty could go right into the houses/flats too. And of course this would provide tons of jobs in construction, architecture, planning etc etc.

Install gardens and green spaces around the place while you are doing this - offer some at low rent, or to buy cheaply, to market gardeners, but specifically put spaces in for communal gardens with the idea of offering allotments and encouraging people to grow their own food.

Put solar panels on every roof and integrate spaces for smaller wind turbines amongst the houses too. Huge storage batteries in basements to make the new blocks as low-footprint and self-sufficient as possible power-wise.

It would be a *fantastic* opportunity to create genuinely accessible housing - office buildings and shops already have lifts and wide corridors ideal for wheelchairs and other mobility devices, so keep that in the design when creating housing. There is a hidden epidemic of houselessness amongst disabled people and older folk with mobility needs, so create low-rent council housing that specifically fits those needs there.

It would regenerate the areas - all the smaller shopfronts not suitable for housing conversion would fill up with people offering the things people in residential neighbourhoods need, with a guaranteed payer base. People on low incomes *use* all of their incomes on necessities, so small businesses selling those necessities will do well. Offer small businesses low rents to provide those necessities. Any that don’t fill up, offer to charities and use for council staff offering the aid and advice people transitioning into housing actually *need*.

Carers are generally low-paid - so this would be an opportunity to offer them cheap housing close to a huge client base in the new accessible housing. No need for low-paid, mostly-female workers to dash constantly between clients in cars. They could walk to work and walk in between clients, who would also no longer be trapped in inaccessible homes, so people who are not actually bedbound would hopefully be less housebound.

Put rooms in the blocks for communal and co-op activities to reduce isolation - with the lifts and wide corridors, even people who are functionally housebound are likely to be able to make it to a room in their own building, and even quite young children could get to those places safely on their own if their parents are working. Wraparound childcare, paid and informal, near where folks actually live.

City centre areas that are now largely dead other than unhoused people, with limited and decreasing zero economic activity taking place and a decreasing incentive for businesses to set up there rather than in out-of-town retail parks people need to drive to, would become vibrant communities with every incentive for businesses to set up there, particularly for the small businesses that still employ the majority of people.

It wouldn’t take a lot to extend this model to transform those out-of-town business parks that are currently largely empty either; nothing says the businesses that are still there would need to move, and they would have a huge new pool of potential employees living within easily walkable distance, though there would need to be oversight to make sure places like Amazon didn’t attempt to buy them up and turn them into company housing. There would need to be a little more investment to provide green transport links like electric buses and trains so that it would be easier for small businesses to move in to provide services, but given the tax income that would result and the reduction in pollution the investment would probably pay itself back within a decade or so.

#a queer crip grows #housing #housing crisis #solarpunk #solutions #solutions to climate crisis #walkable communities #walkable cities #urban gardening #urban food growing #providing housing #ending homelessness #climate friendly #climate crisis #the future is accessible #accessibility #accessible cities #accessible communities

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gatheringbones · 2 years ago

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[“Many landlords were part-timers: machinists or preachers or police officers who came to own property almost by accident (through inheritance, say) and saw real estate as a side gig. But the last forty years had witnessed the professionalization of property management. Since 1970, the number of people primarily employed as property managers had more than quadrupled. As more landlords began buying more property and thinking of themselves primarily as landlords (instead of people who happened to own the unit downstairs), professional associations proliferated, and with them support services, accreditations, training materials, and financial instruments. According to the Library of Congress, only three books offering apartment-management advice were published between 1951 and 1975. Between 1976 and 2014, the number rose to 215. Even if most landlords in a given city did not consider themselves “professionals,” housing had become a business.

The evening’s speaker was Ken Shields, from the Self Storage Brokers of America. After selling his insurance company, Shields had begun looking for a way to get into real estate. He started out with rooming houses, which meant he started out renting mainly to poor single men. “Very nice cash flow. But I no longer have them.” The room chuckled. “I made some good money, and I mean, I love to get money, but I’m still just as happy not running around and dealing with some of these dregs of society who live in rooming houses.”Sherrena, who owned a couple of rooming houses, laughed along with the room. Then Shields found self-storage. “It’s got the residual incomes of an apartment building, but,” he lowered his voice, squinted, “you don’t have the people. You just got their stuff!…This is the sweetest spot in the whole American economy. A receptacle for an enormous cascade of money.”

The landlords loved Ken Shields, even if he did live in Illinois. When he finished his speech, the room broke into applause. The RING president, a mustached man with a full pouch for a stomach, stood up clapping. When there wasn’t a speaker, he often organized round robins. One such evening, a woman from Lead and Asbestos Information Center, Inc., had started off by announcing, “There is money to be made on lead,” to a room of landlords who more often lost money trying to abate it. One landlord asked whether he would have to report the presence of asbestos to the city or the tenants if he tested for it. “No, you don’t,” the woman had said.

The conversation moved on and someone else had asked about garnishing wages. A lawyer informed the room that a landlord was allowed to garnish a tenant’s bank account and up to 20 percent of his or her income, but the last $1,000 was exempt. And welfare recipients were off-limits.

“How about intercepting their tax refund?” Sherrena had asked.

The lawyer looked a bit stunned. “Noooo, only the government can do that.”

Sherrena already knew that. She had looked into it before. Her question wasn’t a question; it was a message to Eric, Mark, Kathy, and everyone else in the room that she would do almost anything to get the rent. Many white landlords knew money could be made in the inner city, where property was cheap, but the thought of collecting payments on the North Side, let alone passing out eviction notices, made them nervous. Sherrena wanted them to know that she could help.”]

matthew desmond, from evicted: poverty and profit in the american city, 2016

#matthew desmond #history stuff #currently reading

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so-i-did-this-thing · 2 years ago

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Moving update

I'm grateful to the folks checking in on me and @crowtoed and thought I'd drop a quick update.

We're almost done putting all non-essentials in storage. The many bins are an investment in case we have to do this again. (I have already started researching shipping containers for an overseas move.) I'm going to buy storage unit insurance this week because I have more valuables stowed away than standard homeowners will cover.

My storage unit is almost the same size as the moving truck, which makes it easy to guage if I have to purge/store anything that won't fit. I'm going to hire the biggest trailer from upack.com when it's time to leave. The prices are amazing - less than $4k to move to Connecticut.

The Florida realtor (a condo expert) is viewing my place tomorrow, and with her advice, we'll start on final repairs/refreshes (this place is 23 years old, about when things like windows and tile get rather iffy). My mother graciously gifted me money to cover the majority of the fixes. This move would be a lot harder without her help.

Mom is also letting us stay short-term in her MiL suite a few towns over, so we can sell my condo asap. That means we don't have to worry about timing the purchase of the new house with closing on the old. Plus, I should have a few paychecks rent-free I can sock away / apply towards mutual aid.

We're hoping the condo sells by June or so. Once that happens, I'll use some of the funds towards old debt to nudge my credit rating ever closer to 800 (it's 778 rn, a multi-year project as I used to be in the 400s). Most of the rest of the money will be earmarked for a generous down payment on the new home.

We're still looking in Connecticut and have a realtor there as well. If it's possible, we can afford to fly up a few times to check out houses. The realtor told us our budget for what we want (1500sq ft or larger) is totally doable. The housing market there is weirdly reasonable.

Work is incredibly kind and has said if I need more than 2 weeks to move, I can take whatever time I need. I am fully remote now and blessed to be part of such a progressive company.

We still have some household and personal things to sell, but it's more out of "I no longer like/need this" than an urgent need for money. But thank you to everyone who has offered cash. It means so much to us to have such a strong safety net. If this happened even 5 years ago, we'd have been up shit creek.

Once we close on the new house, we'll drive up asap to move in. This is when we'll know our route and we'll connect with folks along it who have offered to be pitstops for us and the cats. The moving truck will meet us there in 5-7 business days after we leave Orlando.

My HRT Rx also got renewed for 6 months, and with my current stash + a little rationing, I shouldn't have any interruption with my shots, even if pharmacies start refusing me come July.

We're hoping to be all settled in the new home come October, but are dependant on the housing market. But we're stacking as many chips in our favor as we can.

Again, thank you, thank you to everyone who has reached out. I'll update again when something major changes.

#trans stuff #rrramblings #love you all

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annaholak · 1 year ago

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Inktober, Tiffany Aching, Barbie, and a General Life Update

The Plan: Read the Tiffany Aching books during the summer, re-make her, and use her as the main character for my next Inktober.

The Reality: while I was finishing Cupid Cafe my landlord decided to sell the apartment I've been renting for over a decade. It was an extremely shitty one (no heating, broken air-conditioning units, dark, moldy, etc), but it was dirty cheap, and the best I could afford.

It was sold in mid-June, and the new owner (surprising no one) wanted to raise the rent. I don't know how the rental market is wherever you live, but here (in Athens, Greece) it's a right nightmare (Airbnb has a lot to answer for...). I couldn't find anything in the same price bracket that wasn't basically a tiny basement-turned-into-a-studio. I was panicking. Heavily.

In the end a (really good) friend came to my rescue. She convinced her mom (who had moved to her vacation home during the pandemic) to rent me the city apartment she was rarely using anymore. With the same money I was paying for the previous one. A fucking life saver let me tell you.

It's a much bigger, and generally much nicer, one than the previous shithole I was living in. I finally have enough space for an actual studio. It's also in a much nicer neighbourhood. One I normally would not be able to afford. Lots of green spaces, and very pet friendly (I don't have a pet at the moment, but I'm greatly enjoying meeting all the happy puppers on their walks, whenever I'm out and about).

I moved in in mid-July. I'm still working on it, as I've been going through a lot of the things I had in storage, deciding what to keep, donate, or throw away, and that takes time. The studio is still a mess, but here is a sneak peek of my current working space (the walls were supposed to be lilac, but I'm not complaining - Peppa-the-pig pink it is):

Anyway, back to Inktober. As you can imagine I had hardly the time to read anything during the summer, so the Tiffany Aching idea will have to wait. I also felt extremely uninspired by this year's Inktober prompts. I dug around a bit and found a prompt list I actually like. It's the Mystical Witchtober one, hosted by agingerly aianaiya isabee Madie Meri Marigona Suli Aria and Talita on Instagram. Here's the prompt list (by isabee):

As I was going through the things I've had in storage I found some of my childhood Barbie magazines and sticker albums. So I'm thinking of riding the nostalgia wave, and turning my Witchtober into a slightly Barbie-esque, and a bit late 1980's/early 1990's themed, witch-vampire romance.

I will be working on it at a rather leisurely pace, since I'm still busy working on my new space, and also recovering from a recurring freak throat infection I've had since mid-August (was it strep? was it mono? Who knows? Not my doctors). I've been through two rounds of antibiotics and I'm still not completely well, so please be patient with me.

I think that's all for now. Stick around for a very soft and pink Witchtober. And worry not, I have a lot of Wyrd Sisters things planned once this one is over.

P.S.

Oh yeah, I've also somehow managed in the middle of all the chaos to acquire a new boyfriend. Which hasn't happened in a while. So that's nice.

P.P.S. (bonus for still reading this essay of an update)

I made last year's Wyrd Sisters Abroad Inktober into a zine for the Comicdom Con in May. In true ADHD fashion it was written at five a.m. the morning it had to be at the printer's, after the third all nighter in a row. So typos were inevitable. But the fact that this was the only typo that made it through to the printed version, had me giggling uncontrollably once I discovered it (a couple of months later, it took me a while). Enjoy:

#funny magrat bonus at the end #I think sir terry was having a laugh #oh the irony that is my life #long post #long time no see #personal #new studio #wyrd sisters #inktober #witchtober #barbie

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lucigraves · 3 months ago

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Can't scroll through any social media without reporting/blocking an ad every other post. Personal creations get no traction. Endless amounts of art tossed into the void only to get drowned out beneath ads or bad faith opinions from someone with 100k followers (majority of whom are either bought or bots) who's completely lost touch with reality. Most social media runs exclusively off of a negative feedback loop, you spend so much time being angry at someone who hit post on something just for clicks. They don't think about you, they don't think about consequences because they're making $ off of you being upset.

Can't drive down a highway without being blinded by full LED screens bigger than my house advertising businesses I've known about for 10+ years. The cost of keeping every light on all 25 billboards in a 10 mile stretch would cover the cost of universal housing for the local area for 5+ years. 5 more storage units pop up in whatever land is left for sale.

Can't listen to a streaming service without an ad after every song. Can't listen to podcasts without 10-20 minutes of paid advertisements; all of them are either gacha games (gambling), weight-loss fads, pyramid schemes, therapy with unlicensed physicians who data mine your personal info or some brand you'd have to be living under a rock to not know. Every YouTube content creator makes videos exclusively about covering some topic or fad you should avoid on TikTok, seemingly bringing the topics even more attention than it had before; 30 minutes long with a 10 minute paid advertisement in the middle.

Can't make important phone calls without being met with automated help systems that never have an option for the issue you're having. If you're lucky enough to get sent to a real person you end up waiting 15+ minutes on hold and most of the time get disconnected before you get through, successfully wasting 30 minutes to an hour of you're limited free time.

Every streaming service has new shows and movies every day. One season, three if you're really lucky. And no more 12-24 episode series, now its 8 episodes, because that's whats bingeable. Nothing good approved for more than 2 seasons and maybe a double feature movie to tie up all of the loose ends they thought they had time to finish up before they dared to put a queer character in their cast. Is buying the media physically worth an ad every 20 minutes? Does it even exist physically; or is it another series that'll be lost to time because corporate noticed they can't make an extra $0.05 on every stream.

Every other ad is temu or shein, every product photo is blatantly ripped off of some individual creator on etsy who handmade the item and hasn't gotten a sale in 6 months. Every corporation relies on stealing from solo artists and creators and mass-producing their one-of-a-kind pieces. If they're lucky enough they'll be allowed to do a collab with a big company, all so they can make 2% of the profit.

All of this on top of having to work however many hours you need to to survive, to get by on (probably) the bare minimum, to scrape by. To pay rent to someone who owns 15 properties and charges you double what they pay monthly. Hoping (for your wallet's sake) that you don't have any emergencies lest you empty out what little savings you've been able to put aside. You get maybe 3 hours of free time in your day between keeping up with household needs. All of that, only to have to fight your way through all of the advertisements to try to enjoy the few minutes of free time you get for yourself.

I wish I could put this into words in a more palatable way, but I'm just so tired of being frustrated that so much of my limited time on earth is being wasted so someone else can make $0.0005 on 30 seconds of my life. I'm tired of being advertised to. There's so few places left worth my time on the internet anymore, because they prioritize a few cents to the ceo over me.

#im fucking tired of it man #like really really tired. its hard to enjoy anything anymore especially on the internet #ive stopped posting art anywhere because whats the point #id be lucky if it gained any traction and if it does its just more likely to be fed through some AI #i dont look at twitter anymore and when i do i just get mad that literally every 3 posts theres an ad #ads here arent any better. majority are gambling. the rest are weird broken apps or temu products #lucipurrs #negative #im on bluesky too but barely. rebuilding is too hard and nothing gains traction #i dont have the energy to put in to try to build up a following #i dont have energy to be active enough in a community AGAIN to push my stuff

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genderqueerdykes · 8 months ago

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severely disabled trans person recovering from homelessness needs help with bills

hello, my name is equinox, i am a schizophrenic trans person with hypermobile EDS, arthritis, fibromyalgia and degenerative disc disease. i am a cane and wheelchair user. i was just homeless for 6 months, 2 of which were spent in a hotel paying $40/night. i have finally moved into my new apartment after months of back and forth. moving in was costly, as i had to spend hundreds on a storage unit, transportation to get my possessions into my home, and buying necessary things like a bed and desk to work at

i currently need to pay my internet bill, which is necessary for my job, as i run a jewelry & art business online. i was not aware my internet bill was already due as there was some confusion when i was getting my internet set up and my apartment complex delayed my move in date by several weeks. i cannot conduct business without wifi as my phone has limited data per month. i am currently saving up for rent or i would be able to pay this fairy easily:

$0/$61

if you're interested in helping, you can do so these ways:

cash app: $glitterGraphix

pay pal: glittergraphicnightmare @ gmail .com

chime: $Equinoxian

venmo: $Equinoxian

#share your dollar #trans punks #trans punx #queer mutual aid #trans mutual aid #mutual aid #disabled mutual aid #disabled crowdfund #trans crowdfund #trans fundraiser #queer fundraiser #disabled fundraiser #about us

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brainmaniaman · 2 years ago

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I have been scouring this fucking app for Julian fics, never really occurred to I can just request some lol.

So yeah, if you're up for it I've got a little plot/trope set up that'd id love to see. Outsider(fem)reader/julian.

Something along the lines of a reader moving into the park from the southern us, new to Canada and parks in general. As an outsider, Julian expected you to be trouble or judgemental, so he acts like a dick to you at first. Later on, he starts to see instead how kind you are to everyone, understanding and totally up for doing ppl favors even when there's nothing for you in the end. This makes him feel real guilty for bein an ass to you, and also makes him start to feel other things towards u.. Take the fic in whatever direction you'd I wanna see u work ur magic

( + no pressure 2 write it ofc!!)

pairing: julian/fem!reader fandom: trailer park boys tags: smut (cis man/cis woman), fluff, a bit of angst, idk this is one of my more normal ones, heavy plot some porn (i kind of felt more plot focused with this one), julian is kind of hung (he gives me big dick energy) author's note: i'm much more of a ricky kinda guy myself but when i got this request, i got really fucking excited. i loved the idea. i will say, this fic isn't structured traditionally. it's very dialogue heavy and kind of leaves some things up to the imagination. i wanted to establish relationships between the reader and other people in the park as well as share some of julian's private conversations about her. i'm really proud of the way this has turned out, though i'm sorry if it's not the interpretation you might have been hoping for (i'm a little insecure about the way i interpret storylines). i hope you like it, though. i worked hard on it and i'm pretty sure it's the longest julian/reader fic currently on the internet so i'm going to take that fucking win rn. also, i actually live in the southern united states. (fun fact: i'm looking to move because i'm a trans man and life here is kind of ass if you're trans), so i gave the reader a backstory that's kind of unique to what a woman in 1999-2000 would have gone through. i'm not satisfied with the ending though, i'm sorry if this fic is a little lackluster, but we can only go up from here i guess. text blocking this shit was a fucking BITCH. word count: 6,442

everything i've ever let go of has claw marks on it.

The cultural climate of Sunnyvale Trailer Park wasn't exactly the most inviting. There were people who lived in the park and then there was everyone else. For the most part, newcomers never lasted more than a few weeks. The bottle kids drove away the weakest among them, but if those kids weren't effective usually Ricky's antics drove away the remaining lot. Sure, there were a few people here and there who moved in quietly, but those were usually the kind of people that minded their own business because lot rent was low enough for them to just ignore Lahey.

But in general, new people were not welcome. Especially know-it-all hipsters trying to live the simple life by casting away their possessions in an expensive storage unit and downsizing to a more humble trailer. Those were the kinds of guys that gave up quickly. Plus, new people threatened the balance of park politics. For the most part, Julian was well-liked and well-respected among the others due to his caring nature and dedication to his loved ones. He protected his own. And if there was one thing Julian didn't like, it was newcomers coming into the park without already knowing someone in it.

"Barb, I really think you should reconsider letting this girl in. I mean, you don't even know who she is."

"Julian, this is a business, not a family estate. Her credit was just below decent, she has an okay-paying job, and paid three months of rent in advance. From a business perspective, she seems like she'll be a reliable tenant. It's a good thing you've grown close with your community, but you have to remember at the end of the day, this trailer park is here to make money. Whatever fit of paranoia you're suffering through, deal with it on your own time. Next time you come here with a complaint, make sure it's a business one."

And just like that, Barb had shooed Julian off. What more could he say to that? Well, he had a lot more to say to that but she didn't want to listen. Every time he opened his mouth to speak, she only guided him further to the door. If Julian thought he was the one who ran this trailer park, he had another thing coming for him that's what. This dump needed more reliable tenants - normal folks who didn't like to get into trouble. Barb was trying to turn the park's image around.

"Julian, I just don't understand why you're so against this lady stayin' here. You know I'm no fan of newcomers myself, but she's been mindin' her own. She actually keeps her yard clean, which is pretty fuckin' nice if you ask me. It's nice to pass a yard that doesn't have a million fuckin' pieces of trash thrown all over the front. She even has one of those pink fuckin' yard flamingos in her yard. It's so bright and colorful. There ain't nothin' wrong with a little bit of color, Julian. Ain't nothin' wrong with a little bit of change."

"Are you even listening to yourself talk Bubbles? Can you hear what you're saying? You're saying change for this park is good. Who knows what she believes in. She might hate dope growers, she may be workin' with Lahey, she could get nosy and bust us for dope and you know Ricky and I are growin' a lot of dope -"

"- I know, I've seen that big fuckin' setup you got in that fuckin' trailer in that shitty little lot -"

"- so then Bubbles you should know that new people aren't good. We can't trust new people, especially not now. Especially not when we're so close to selling them to those prison guards and retiring. A stranger could compromise the whole thing. Remember those bible scammers that came through here? I've learned my lesson since then and I'm not tryna repeat old mistakes."

"Jesus Murphy Julian, you need to calm down. Those fuckin' assholes were obviously scammers, it's not like this lady is goin' door to door scammin' people."

"Sure maybe she's not taking advanced orders on bibles Bubbles, but she is goin' in and out of everyone's house doin' favors for them. Why does she need to see the inside of everyone's house? Do you think she's lookin' for something?"

"Have you ever stopped to think that maybe she's just a nice person doin' a nice thing? Nice people exist. You've been dealin' with dope and crime and jail so much that it's like you forgot how to trust someone. All you think about is dope and how you're going to protect it from everyone else."

"You're only defendin' her because she brings you boxes of canned cat foods for your cats. She's buyin' you off and you don't even know it."

"So what if she's helpin' me take care of my kitties? My kitties are the most important things to me and unlike you, she fuckin' knows that. If someone's offering to help take care of my precious little kitties, who the fuck am I to say no?"

"Bubbles, look -"

"No, no, nevermind." Bubbles tucks a gray cat further into his arms, his posture becoming more rigid. It's clear that he's done with the conversation, no longer interested in trying to hammer commonsense into Julian's brain. He couldn't see past his own paranoia and it was infuriating. In Julian's mind, everyone in the world was out to get him - even the nice lady across the street who helped his friend support his kitties. "You just don't get it, Julian. I'm goin' back home, come talk to me when you get it."

Julian was still convinced he was right about this girl. If the bottle kids didn't run you out, he'd just take matters into his own hands. He didn't care whether or not Bubbles helped. Julian was a man of many connections, and even if he couldn't find someone else to get the job done he had no qualms with taking care of the situation himself.

"I mean, if you think that lady's dangerous then you know I'm gonna follow you Julian 'cause you got the brains and stuff behind the projector, but I just gotta let you know I'm still workin' on my grade ten so whatever idea you have you got to make sure it's not illegal 'cause I can't go back to jail, not right before Trinity's birthday. That means we can't do any property damage or breaking and entering or any shit like that."

"I promise you Ricky we're not gonna go back to jail, we're just gonna annoy the shit out of her until she leaves. I was thinkin' maybe you and Cory and Trevor could host like a really loud party across the street tomorrow night, you know - something to keep her awake. If we get a noise complaint, we'll just shut it down, but then once the cops leave we'll start it back up again. We'll do this for a few nights until she finally decides to move out."

"That's a pretty fucking good idea, that's smart. Plus, since it's a party we can get drunk and high."

It's 2 a.m. and that fucking party is still going. There were several times you considered calling in a noise complaint but you decided that it was a better idea to just wait it out. It had to end at some point and overall, it was never a good idea to get involved with parties like that because sometimes they got out of a hand, and you were too smart to be in the wrong place at the wrong time.

Though when you stepped outside to 'check your mailbox' - spy on the party still going on into the early hours of the morning - you find yourself tripping over something. You stumble onto your hands and knees and it's only when you pull yourself up do you really get a good look at the man passed out by your mailbox. It's Ricky, and he's mumbling things almost incoherently. He mutters something about dope, bitches, Trinity, more bitches, Lucy, and good booze. It's a pathetic way to be, but you can't help but feel bad for you.

You use the toe of your shoe to rock his face awake. Ricky sputters before waking up in a drunk panic. He's angry and yelling incoherently, but your promise of a hot shower and a hot sandwich satiates his anger. He struggles his way through a shower, though almost slips a few times. He eats hand to mouth, chewing loudly, and drunk conversation ensues. He shares a lot with you - stuff he probably wouldn't have shared sober. He eventually passes out, not remembering much in the morning. That morning you share breakfast and a little bit about each other. He tried to hate you, he really did, but you were charismatic in a friendly way. There weren't any ulterior motives, you just enjoyed conversation.

"I don't know Julian, she seems fine to me. I mean, she's not all that bad. Her yard is pretty clean and you know, she has that pink little flamingo in her yard and honestly it's pretty fuckin' cute. I mean yeah she's kinda annoying and I hate that fuckin' southern fuckin' cowboy accent she fucking has but whatever. I think you're gettin' worked up over nothin'. You've been so busy tryna push out this lady who hasn't done nothin' wrong to you while I'm over here slavin' away watchin' after these fuckin' dope plants and tryin' to study for my grade ten all while play peepin' tom spy guy on some poor fuckin' lady."

"You're just saying that 'cause she let you spend the night and made you breakfast."

"You know what I sure as fuck I am! She made me breakfast and kept me from sleepin' on the fuckin' ground drunk as piss and let me use her shower and shit and I didn't even have to put out! It's not like I trust her or anything like that - I didn't talk about dope or nothin' like that at all." That was the truth. "It's just at this point anything is better than fucking Cory and Trevor. I'm not sayin' you gotta like her or trust her, but she's not all that bad Julian. Maybe if you actually got to fuckin' know her like I have you'd see that you're just being a paranoid dickbag."

"You know what Ricky, you don't anything about her. You're just seeing what she wants you to see. But I'm smart, so I see right through it -"

"Come on Julian don't be like that -"

"- and since nobody is going to take care of this fucking situation then I guess I'll have to."

Julian felt like everyone around him was failing him. Nobody else seemed to feel the same way he did about your existence in the trailer park. As each day passed, Julian grew more overtly snide. When approaching Ricky and Bubbles, Julian never took the time to acknowledge you. It was obvious that he was just being an ass, so you opted to ignore it, preferring not to fight. Silence was Julian's strongest weapon. But as the days ticked by, the tension between you and Julian only seemed to mount itself higher.

It's not like you inherently disliked Julian. In fact, you liked to believe that there was good in everyone and you prided yourself in your ability to be able to pull even the toughest people out of their shell. However, Julian was no easy project. Every time you tried to approach him, he simply brushed you off. You weren't even sure that the two of you had even exchanged any greetings. He hadn't even said hello. So when trying to talk to him didn't work, you simply tried to stay out of his way. This was frustrating for Julian because what he wanted you to do was to blow up and make it a big ordeal. But you didn't. You simply kept to yourself and resumed helping others around the park without complaints.

There were times where Julian thought about approaching you in the way Julian thinks about approaching any pretty thing in a summer dress that talks to him. But he remains strong in the face of adversity. Gone were the days of chasing anything in a dress. He had a dope business to worry about.

But sometimes the thought would creep up onto Julian ever so slowly. Sometimes, he'd get this kind of fantasy in his head - especially on the Sunday afternoons you'd spend gently pushing yourself back and forth in your rocking chair, enjoying the summer sunlight. He could think of a million ways you two could enjoy the afternoon together, but he often pushed the thought out of his head. He had a park to protect. Friends to protect.

"You know, you have some real nerve comin' up here in this trailer park and putting on a show like you're doing."

You look up from the rocking chair you were gently pushing yourself back and forth in and offer Julian a small smile.

"So you're Julian?"

Julian can't help but be a bit enamored with your slight southern drawl. It sounds like you're somewhere from the deep southern United States - one of those more rural provinces like Texas or Alabama. He can't quite pinpoint the accent, but he secretly finds it endearing.

"And how do you know that?"

"I mean, with how much you do for the people here it's kind of hard not to know who you are. Plus, Ricky and Lucy both never seem to shut up about you. You know, if I didn't know any better I'd say they're both in love with you or something. Also, yesterday you came to pick up Ricky and he pointed right at you and said well, there's Julian, see ya later. I just put two and two together."

"I'm not here to make small talk, (name)."

"Then what are you here to do, Julian?"

There's silence. What is he here to do. There wasn't anything that he could reasonably do and he wasn't the terrorizing type if he didn't have to be. Fuck, he had even promised that his greasy trouble-causing days were over. But here he was, standing at the edge of the patio stairs, contemplating whether or not he should threaten a woman.

"I'm just here to ask you about your intentions with Ricky, that's all."

You can't help but laugh out loud at the comment. "Oh, please. There's nothing going on between us."

Julian knows that because if there was something going on between you and Ricky, Ricky wouldn't shut up about it and the whole park would know. But he's trying to be covert about his intent to interrogate you.

"Yeah, well . . . there better not be . . . Ricky's a good guy and I'd really hate to see him get hurt . . ."

"Why are you really here, Julian?"

Julian stands in silence, thoughtfully cradling his glass in his hand as he tries to come up with a clever lie - but it's hard to think when he catches a glimpse of your thighs pressed together underneath your thin summer dress. He squints and then looks away briefly.

"I just wanted to stop by and tell you more about the culture of Sunnyvale. You know, we're really tight-knit. Like family."

"I know."

"And you know, family protects family."

"I know."

"And you know, I'd do anything for my family."

"I know."

"Anything."

"What are you getting at?"

"I'm not getting at anything, (name). I'm just givin' you a little more info about our park, just trying to get acquainted with you."

"Oh, you're trying to get acquainted with me? This is the first time I've spoken to you in the month I've been living here."

"Well, you know, I was busy with the business I'm running -"

"- that lawn mowing business you and Ricky got?"

Is that what Ricky is calling it? "Yeah, we've had a lot of customers so I've been having to do a lot of bookwork to keep up with the business you know. But it's been busy, so I haven't had time to talk, but now I do and I want to get to know you."

"You want to get to know me?"

"That's what I just said isn't it?"

"Well I'll tell you what Julian," You push the chair backwards in thought, looking up at the bright summer sky. The sun shines in your face, warming your skin. It's a nice feeling. "If you really want to get to know me, you'll come over for dinner tonight."

Julian wasn't going to admit it but he was excited at the prospect of dinner. The last time he shared time - much less a meal - with a woman, she ended up stealing his dope plants and lying to him about being in love. In all fairness, most people would have been wary of someone saying I love you within the first week of getting to know them, but Julian (for the most part) was a hopeless romantic. He liked the idea of a life with someone else.

Julian told himself that this was strictly business - that he was here to set the record straight. This wasn't get-to-know-you dinner, this wasn't a date. He was just here to let you know that he wasn't going to tolerate funny business. He just happened to be wearing his nicest clean black shirt and he just happened to be wearing one of his nicer pair of jeans - the ones that didn't have the holes in them. Julian knocks on your door. The two minutes he waits for you to answer feels like an eternity but when you open the door, he's glad he's waited.

"You got a hot date you're going to after this?"

"What, this?" You look down at the pink summer dress you're wearing, "This is casual." You had always been the more feminine type, enjoying softer clothes and pretty dresses. Plus, unlike jeans dresses were more comfortable. You usher him inside and he obliges, being careful to not spill his drink when he steps in.

"Dinner is served." Dinner being a massive fucking bowl of macaroni and cheese with cheap ass hot dogs. "Sorry it's not exactly the best, but -"

"It's fine, don't worry about it." Julian sets his glass down. He's actually ecstatic. Macaroni and cheese and fucking hotdogs? "You know, I don't know where you're from but around here this is a five-star meal."

You give a dry laugh. as Julian picks up his fork to eat. "You'll have to forgive me, I'm kind of new to the whole trailer park life and the whole being poor thing."

"Oh yeah? Where are you from?"

"Southern United States."

"What state?"

"Texas."

"That's a long way from here, basically on the other side of the continent. Why'd you come up this way?" Julian tells himself that he's not trying to get to know you because he's interested in you - he's trying to get to know you to get dirt on you, to know what he's up against.

"I needed an abortion." You answer dryly, "And even though it's been legal for some years now, no physician was wiling to perform one on me."

"Why come to Nova Scotia? Why not just go to another state?"

"Well, I figured things were just better here than they were there. Don't get me wrong, it's not perfect by any means but it's better than where I was from. At least here I know if I need the service again, it's a little more reliably accessible. Plus, it's not like I had anywhere or anyone I could turn to. So I just kind of . . . stayed."

"Heavy stuff." Julian sets down his fork, "Didn't have any family to turn to?"

"No, and even if I did they're not the kind of people I'd want to be around."

Julian could relate to that.

"So you just came to Canada for an abortion and then decided to stay? You know, when Americans come to Canada they want to go to Quebec. Nova Scotia isn't exactly on the top of the list, let alone Dartmouth. Let alone fucking Sunnyvale Trailer Park. Nobody just moves in here. Come on, (name) . . . what's the real reason why you're staying here?"

Your mouth runs dry as you consider answering him honestly. "Well, uh . . . you know . . ." You twiddle your thumbs a bit, "I came to Canada with my passport and got my abortion and then . . . I just uh . . ." There's a long pause as your appetite disappears completely. "I didn't have anywhere to go to so I just . . . never left . . . this place was the only place that'd rent to an illegal resident . . ."

"Holy fuck you don't have your papers?" Julian wasn't sure what kind of story he was expecting but it wasn't that. Now he feels like an asshole. "How did you get a job? How did you even afford this place?"

"Well, I had some savings so that was a good cushion, but when that ran out I was able to find a job working as a waitress at that little restaurant just out of town. I'm not technically on the payroll, they just don't make me report my tips, and any extra money is kind of . . . earned under the table." You respond sheepishly.

God, Julian feels like such a fucking jackass for being a raging asshole to you.

"That's . . . hard." Julian doesn't really know what else to say.

"Yeah."

"Well, I've shared my deepest darkest secret with you. Do you want to share anything with me?"

You and Julian talk well into the early hours of the morning, swapping life stories, funny anecdotes, and talking about all of the small things in between. Honestly, he feels at ease with you in a way he hasn't felt at ease before. The conversation flows naturally and even the silence you occasionally fall into feels comfortable. It's nearly two in the morning when you both look at the small clock hanging on your wall and realize the time.

". . . well, it's a little late . . ." You stretch in your chair, still sitting across the table from Julian. You don't really want him to go, but you've both run out of things to talk about and you still have some errands you have to run before work tomorrow. "You know, I have some things I gotta do tomorrow . . . but if you're feeling nice, maybe you can pay me back for dinner by making some for me. I'm usually too tired to cook when I get home . . . you know, only if you want to."

It's hard for Julian to say no to that face.

"What time do you get off work?"

. . .

Julian continues to insist that he doesn't feel some kind of way, that he's just taking the opportunity to really get to know you - you know, in case you ever pose a threat - but the nightly dinner-dates seem to differ.

"Why is it so hard to admit that you have a hard-on for (name)? It's so fucking obvious."

"It's not like that Ricky. You know, I have somewhere to be so why don't you just fuck off and give me some fucking space?"

"Oh yeah I know exactly where you want to be, all up in -"

The truth of the matter was that even though Julian fantasized about it at night, truly nothing had happened. You were sweet, kind, intelligent, patient, compassionate - a truly wonderful person. And that was the problem. Normally, Julian found himself happy to jump into a relationship, but he found himself afraid of making a fool of himself. Guys like him didn't get with girls like you. Simple as that. Besides, love just wasn't in the cards for Julian. It just never worked out like that.

Tonight was yet another night of disappointment. You had lingered on Julian's doorstep after dinner, hoping that maybe he'd make a move and at least give you a kiss goodnight - but the two of you simply stood there awkwardly until he nodded, saying he was probably going to go off to bed now. It was frustrating because you thought you were sending all of the right signals. Light touches, flirtatious giggles, risque comments - the works. But yet again, you find yourself leaving empty-handed. It wasn't that you weren't satisfied with the friendship, you really liked the dynamic the two of you had. You liked that Julian showed you ways to save money, ways to spruce up the trailer home so it felt more roomy, showed you around town a bit - but it left you feeling a bit stupid because you could have sworn the two of you had something more. You could just feel it. But he never addressed it and it drove you crazy.

You knock on the door nervously, your hands shaking.

Julian answers the door again. "What's going on?"

"I don't want to go home just yet. This is about the time J-Roc films his adult films. Can I just sit here for thirty more minutes? He usually finishes up around one in the morning or so."

"Uh, yeah, sure, come on in. You can hang out here. I have to shower because, you know, I got somewhere to be in the morning -" Tomorrow was the day he was supposed to drop off the product with the prison guards, "- normally I'd wait up but I got some important stuff I gotta take care of tomorrow. I'm about to get ready for bed, so you can just leave whenever you're ready."

"Alright."

You find yourself sitting awkwardly on the couch as Julian disappears into the bathroom. The trailer shakes a bit when he turns on the water and you can hear the pipes rush before the water falls like rain into the tub. You sit in silence and contemplate. You couldn't keep going back and forth like this, it'd get nowhere. He had hinted a few times at maybe having feelings. Sometimes his hand would linger on the small of your back too long when he was moving past you, or he'd stand too close to you - so close your shoulders would touch - whenever he got the chance. But nothing would ever come of it, and you were tired of it. You think about maybe joining him in the shower but that's too ballsy of a move, so you simply sit there and listen to the shower run until it's turned off. There's more shuffling and you can hear him go into his room. The hallway light turns off and the door clicks close. You should probably get going by now, but you can't bring yourself to just leave.

. . .

You feel like a psychopath drifting down the hallway. You only came down here to use the bathroom, but now you were standing at his bedroom door - contemplating whether or not you should knock on the door.

Knock. Knock. Knock.

"Ricky, is that you? I told you to stop picking my fucking lock -"

"No," You answer meekly, "It's me. I uh, wanted to take that book back I lent you before I went home. I didn't see it in your living room so I figured you might be keeping it in here."

Julian stares up at the ceiling in thought. Julian is pretty book-smart and it doesn't take a genius to know the game you're running. He's been down this road a thousand times. He wants to say yes, but there's still the lingering fear of ruining the good friendship that's already there.

Julian turns his head to look at his nightstand, the small paperback book sat there. Shit, maybe you weren't playing any games.

"Yeah, give me a moment, I'll come bring it to you."

"You don't have to go through that trouble, I'll just come get it real quick . . . if that's alright with you."

". . . that's alright with me."

You gently push the door open, slipping through before gently closing the door behind you. You can only see the outline of Julian's body in the dark, a few shadows illuminated by the moonlight that drifts in through the blinds.

"It's right over here." You see the shadow of Julian's hand reach over and grab the thick book. Infinite Jest.

"I'll come get it." You pull yourself up onto the bed, you're knees on either side of his feet. Gently, you shimmy your way up, crawling over him on your hands and knees. Julian shifts a bit. Both of your breaths are heavy and as you sit yourself comfortably on his waist, you watch his chest rise and fall with heavy breaths. Gently, you pluck the book from his hand. "Thank you."

"You're welcome." Julian's voice is barely over a whisper.

You thumb through the thick book, landing on a page barely illuminated by the moonlight, reading the page you've thumbed to. "Everything I've ever let go of has claw marks on it." Truer words have never been spoken. Like everything in life, Julian has sunk his fingernails so deep into it he's drawn blood. He likes to pretend he can let things go, but he can't.

Julian's hands gently grip at your hips, squeezing them softly - almost like he's afraid that if he squeezes too tight he'll hurt you. His fingers grip at your waist, gently pushing your hips backwards, guiding them in a gentle rocking motion against him. Your hips follow the movement of his hands, rocking against him with a pleased hum.

"Is that right?" Julian asks in a whisper.

"That's right." You respond gently.

"Me included?" He can't hope that you want him so bad that you'd sink your nails so deep into him that he'd never be able to leave you, even if he wanted to. And even if you wanted to leave him, he'd probably stay around and beg for you to take him back anyway.

"If you'll let me."

If he wasn't rock hard before he's rock fucking hard now. "I want you." Julian's voice is hoarse, completely contradicting his typically firm and masculine present. He melts under you. Whether he wanted to believe it or not, Julian was a romantic and the touch of a woman he really valued meant a lot to him. His breath is labored as he guides your hips against him, "Please, I want you."

If this were someone else in the park, it'd be a different story. Sleeping around with people in the park for Julian wasn't about emotions, it was about releasing a physical need, and when you can't keep a boyfriend sometimes you have to turn to your neighbors for some help. Everyone slept with everyone. But you're not them, this isn't just casual for Julian - he doesn't want to fuck it up. He shudders when your fingertips drag across his chest, tracing patterns and circles into his shirt as you rock against him, grinding your hips downwards to create more friction. You're a tease, you take your time, and he hates it but he loves it. Two large hands reach up to cup your breasts over your shirt gently, His hands trail downwards, over your abdomen, grabbing gently at your stomach for a short moment before finding themselves at the hem of your shirt.

"What are you waiting for?" You ask him between small breaths, still making rhytmic riding motions. It's a softly-asked question but also a plea for action. "Please, Julian. I've wanted this since the moment I saw you."

"God, fuck you're so fucking hot." It's like a flip switched in his head and he can't hold himself back anymore. Strong hands placed firmly on your hips flip you onto your back. Now he's on top of you, every part of him everywhere. His lips touch yours in a kiss, teeth pull at the skin of your neck, and tongue sooths the freshly bruised areas by rubbing itself on it in small circles. Like always, he can't help himself, and unlike recently, he stops wasting time.

Your shirt is the first thing to come off - Julian helps shimmy it off of you, throwing it to the side. The next thing to come off is your pajama pants, which he also tosses to the side after helping shimmy it off of you. He has half a mind to compliment the pretty color of your underwear and tell you it looks good on you, but he doesn't pay it any mind since it's about to come off anyways. His hands lift you up by the small of your back just long enough for him to unclasp your bra, letting you fall back down onto the bed. His hands hook underneath your knees, lifting them up and pushing your legs up so he can help slide your underwear easily off of your body. You're left naked under him while he remains fully clothed, lowering himself onto you before you can complain that he hasn't undressed yet.

His thumbs roll against your nipples, gently pinching and pulling at them before taking them into his mouth. Julian has never been the most gentle lover, especially when he gets excited, always eager to take matters into his own hands - but that's part of his appeal.

Kisses trail down your stomach, followed by him dragging his tongue along the skin, pushing your legs apart. He takes his time adorning your inner thighs with kisses, sucking on the skin and taking it between his teeth. He likes the way he makes you whimper and moan, it's intoxicating. But eventually the teasing becomes too much even for him, he's growing impatient, so he lends his tongue to you, circling it around your clit, strong nose pressed into sensitive skin.

Your body writhes as you feel a familiar pressure build in your abdomen, thighs tightening around his head so tight he thought he might suffocate. What a way to go that would be. Your fingers curl into his short hair, gripping and pulling at his hair while your toes curl. You whimper but that only encourages him to slowly push his thick index finger into you, followed by a second after you properly adjusted. His mouth and fingers work in tandem, his fingers curling and pressing inside of you in a come hither motion while his tongue continues to stroke your clit.

"Fuck, Julian, god, fuck -" But before you can climax, he's gone - pulling away. If Julian enjoys anything, it's edging. There's just something about bringing a woman to climax and leaving them nearly in tears that turns him on.

"You look disappointed." Julian catches a glimpse of your lopsided frown illuminated in the moonlight, "Don't worry, I'll take care of it." His shirt is pulled over his head, exposing his bare chest. When you touch the muscle, it's firm from years of consistent working-out. You trace a tattoos that look like they were done with a sewing needle and ink - probably stick and poke tattoos - but Julian frowns. He doesn't like those tattoos, he's not proud of them and he's not proud of his time spent in jail. But you only offer him an encouraging smile and place your palm over the tattoo before dragging your hand down to his belt, pulling at the buckle. Julian offers you a half-hearted smile. "Can't wait?"

Julian pushes your hand out of the way gently, taking his time to unfasten his belt and slowly pulling it through the loops. The belt is tossed to the side, along with his pants and underwear, leaving you both equals. Two hands hook themselves underneath your knees, placing your ankles on his shoulders while he uses his right hand to stroke his cock a bit, helping to harden himself up more. Sometimes the nerves just get to you.

"Holy fuck Julian you're big, you gotta be careful with that thing you're carrying a whole fucking concealed weapon -"

Julian chuckles a bit at the comment but presses a gentle kiss to your ankles. "I'll be careful with you if that's what you're trying to say."

The tip is pushed in slowly with great discomfort, pushing himself in. There's a stiff moment of silence as you let out a labored breath.

"You good?" he asks.

You nod, dragging your teeth over your bottom lip. Julian takes his thumb against your bottom lip, peeling it out from underneath your teeth. His thumb drags your bottom lip down, exposing the inside of it before pushing his thumb into your mouth. Your lips wrap around his thumb, letting your tongue slide against the skin, sucking on the appendage as he pulls out just a bit, repositioning himself before he thrusts back in. Your body pushes upwards with the motion, head pressing against the headboard slightly. His thumb is still pressed in your mouth while his free hand keeps hooked underneath your knee, pushing it backwards so he can angle himself better - each thrust pushing itself deeper inside of you. Sweat coats his chest and runs down the side of his face, abdomen flexing the closer he gets to coming, but he restrains himself - wanting to ride it out for as long as he could.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck."

"Oh, God, Julian -"

"Fuck, (name)."

"Julian -"

"(Name), (Name), (Name)."

"I heard you did a real good job of running that girl out of the trailer park last night, Julian."

"Hey, Barbara, why don't you fuck off?"

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