#brian gives me more inspiration so i think this is a good decision!!!

[wordsbymae]

Hey! Just checking in and i just want to give some love to your aesthetics because they have their own album in my photos just so i can appreciate and think about these characters you got me simping after!

Also i was possibly wondering if you could possibly give descriptions of all your characters i just got out of a huge art block and i wanna draw farmer and also most of your cast. Ive tried already but id like to see them from your eyes and what you think they look like! I would also like to share them if you do but please know there is no pressure and if you already have descriptions i apologize i just get lost in your wonderful content!

Also, I hope you're doing well! - wave anon

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Ok, my time of mourning is over. Also, I fell asleep so my bad. Anyway! Let's try this again.

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Hi! So good to hear from you again. How are you? Oh my goodness that is so cool! I’m so glad you like them!

Of course, I can! It would be my pleasure. I would love to see them but no pressure at all if life gets in the way or you change your mind. No need to apologise! I usually keep descriptions of the yanderes to a minimum just because I know everyone has different types, so I like that people can imagine the type of person they want. Although I do have to imagine them to write so I love sharing that, even though “canonically” they look however the reader wishes them to look. I usually use face claims cause I am lazy at trying to make a new face or mix and match, but there are small differences here and there. Also, you’re gonna make me cry! I am so flattered you wanted to draw my characters; it is honestly surreal!

So, let’s start with the FARMER. So, the farmer is unique compared to my other ocs just cause the reader gets to see him at different stages of his life (although AUs). The older farmer is anywhere in age between 35-50 (depending on what the reader prefers) and is the stereotypical good-looking’’ but rough farmer you see in tv shows and movies. His face claim is Josh Lucas in Yellowstone. He wears mainly dark jeans with a grey tee and long-sleeved collared shirts over the top. He does not go outside without his hat. His hair is dark brownish and long enough that he has to rake it back to put his hat back on, and he also has a ‘70s moustache, with some stubble, even if he shaved yesterday.

YOUNGER FARMER is a little different though, he's between 23-29. I had Brian Van Holt as Bo Sinclair as his face claim, especially in how he acts a bit, but now I also have Lewis Pullman in Outer Range as Rhett Abbott as another face claim. Both suit really well, but Rhett is honestly just that bit better. I haven’t watched the show but from the stills I’ve seen, he suits the vibe really well. But as long as he is clean-shaven and wears similar clothes to old man farmer, it's the younger farmer. I see him wearing a lot of baseball/trucker caps. Most likely he only has one he wears to death and that’s why he doesn’t wear it anymore when he’s older cause it literally doesn’t exist anymore.  I don't see his hair being as long as Rhett's though, maybe even like Arvin Russel's hair from devil all the time. Longish, but not long enough.

FISHERMAN is someone that took me forever to decide what he looks like. I was torn between a lean or beefy fisherman. Thankfully the decision was made for me when I saw a still from the movie the lighthouse of Robert Patterson standing over the top of someone. Also, that movie (even though I haven’t seen it) is a big inspiration for the fisherman. The insanity and derangement of the characters are perfect, and I have quite stills saved in my Pinterest. So yeah, Robert Patterson in that movie is kinda my inspo for the fisherman. My fisherman though is still a little bit more muscular, just a bit. Nothing too crazy, just enough that the reader in my head gets a bit intimidated when they try and stand their ground. Also, I see his hair being much shorter, maybe even cropped on both sides (not to the point of it being shaved off though) but the 19th-century-looking facial hair has to stay though I think, it builds character. He wears a lot of woollen jumpers and rough fabric and looks very weathered and grey.

OK OK, HEAR ME OUT. I have a very particular face claim for KILLER, that has been rattling around my head for over two years even though I only wrote him last year. But killer has to look like Mario Casas in The Skin of the Wolf (at least in my mind). If you want to look, def put the name of the movie as well otherwise the vibes disappear real quick. Anyway, I won’t bore you with a summary of the movie or why it has to be him (Although it is a really good movie, made me cry, and I refused to finish it cause I knew it was about to end in more tears, so in my mind him and his - kinda forced- wife live happily ever after, he sucks - in a kinda hot way- as a person though, great movie for yandere inspo). Ok, so he's really tall, really buff, really dirty looking and then kinda mash him with Thomas Hewitt in the fact he looks like he could bench press a car. Kinda that vibe. Hair is wild, messy, and matted in some places, and his beard is just a mess at this point.

The VIKING is another one that took forever for me to make a choice on how he looks. I actually saved a pic in my Pinterest that was how I view him forever until I realised it was a god of war concept art (nothing wrong with that! but I didn't want to make it fanficish). So he's the only one where I legit have mashed together pieces of people together to get the best out of him. He definitely has long facial hair (not super long, but long compared to nowadays), and he has long hair and a scar running diagonally across one of his eyes. I literally use every attractive man in every Viking-inspired movie or tv show for him so run wild with him! I would love to see how you view him.

ELI is another one I have a very particular face claim for (but you don't have to draw them like that! It just helps me visualise what's happening). I have him down as Jack O'Connell in Godless, but also as Hoyt Rawlins from Walker Independence (A new development for me, it was just the other guy FOR MONTHS). While the other guy is how I view him looking, Hoyt is definitely how he acts, almost spot on. It was crazy watching it and going holy shit! a blonde happy-go-lucky gunslinger cracking jokes at every possible second, it's just Eli but without the whole werewolf thing. He definitely has shorter hair than my other ocs, he keeps it cut quite close, but his beard is something he doesn't really care for, mainly cause it doesn't grow very thick, so he doesn't have to worry. He's got dirty blonde hair, bordering brown but still blonde.

Ok, so the MAD KING is one I'm really happy I changed my mind for. I had him as the evil prince from a letter to the king. But he looks very young and actually not that threatening if you take all the armour off him. Very boyish and not someone you would call a mad king, mad/evil/wicked prince yes, but not a king. But you know someone that looks like a king? Dev Patel in The Green Knight. Oh boy, I am obsessed. The shots of him in the crown and on the throne? Perfect, literally perfect. Now imagine being the queen standing beside him, tears in your eyes and having to hold his hand while yours shakes, your marriage being announced to the kingdom. It fits. So yeah def him, I didn't really change much, the hair and everything suit so yeah. But once again you don't have to draw just actors/characters! If you want to add something in or change things around go for it! Draw for enjoyment!

Lucky last! ALWYN! He was another one who didn't really have someone as a face claim until recently. I just imagined him with scruffy dark hair, dark eyes and a bit muscly. However, I do now use Alex Garcia when he has longish hair. But that's just kind of a placeholder. The guy who played gwaine is another good inspo. But Alwyn always changes how he looks in my mind when I write so I'm happy with whatever!

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Haha, jokes I'm including the SHEEP SHEARER fella for funsies. Ok so I haven't made a decision on the face claim, and I would really want to see how you'd view him. No pressure to draw though!! You do it for yourself, forget about me! I know I literally haven't written a word about him, but I'm planning on setting it late 19th century and having the reader be the niece of the sheep farmer. The reader comes from a pretty well-off family and is visiting her uncle for a little bit. Anyway, she catches the eye of literally every non-related male on the property and since it's a shearing season, there are also a good twenty other men on top of her uncle's workers vining for her attention. I want to make her a little bit naive and not really understanding why all these men want to be her friend, but the sheep shearer, who will be getting a name cause fuck typing that six times, (Probs gonna be Lachlan, shortened to lochy, its a very common name here and apparently not very common elsewhere. although uk probs has it) does. And he hates it. He isn't the best with women, not as smooth as his mates, but he won't let this one get away.

Anyway!!! Thank you for sending this though and all the best!!!!!!!!!

[danpuff-ao3]

New Goals!

While writing my dear friend Bethy this morning, I sort of made the decision to scale back and rethink all of my grand plans.

Now, I am a lady who can do a lot. That ADHD + OCD combo can be good for some things, I suppose, especially when properly medicated! Accomplishing a lot makes me feel good and happy and gets me all riled up to do more! What I at times fail to remember is that this energy and focus isn't endless. And my sense of responsibility and perfectionism will mean my doom when I inevitably slow down.

My therapist and I have been working on me recognizing and celebrating what I do accomplish, even when they're not on my "list." I have a bad habit of feeling useless when I did 10 things in a day but none of them were on my "list" or in my "plans" and so I chalk the day up as a failure. It helps me to stop and look and say "Hey! I did that! That is a thing that I did and that's very cool and good of me." And that helps.

But it also helps to recognize when my Brain (also named Brian, per my friend Nina, based on a misreading of a Tweet some months ago, haha!) is getting overexcited and dancing around and adding more and more grand plans to our plate. It also helps to verbalize because, for me, and my dang Leo Moon, I need to share and to be seen and understood.

So while there is plenty I'd like to do, I've narrowed down my goals for the year to 3 pretty solid goals:

Snarry-a-Thon

Snarry Bang

Project: Three of Hearts

While the plan is to complete and submit fics for the above fests, my Project is just what I plan to work on in between times. My goal is progress there.

So regarding the above goals, this is where I'm at:

Snarry-a-Thon: Rough Draft & Edit 1 done. Off for beta reading now.

Snarry Bang: teammate chosen and as of yesterday a plan nailed down!

Project: Three of Hearts: Very loose outline. And chapter 1 done! I figured my struggle with the outline might be helped by starting it, to help give me more of a feel for characterization and dynamics. I think it helped because my "vague outline" is starting to feel a bit more solid!

WIPs I would like to make progress on this year, but am refusing to to stress about:

Dralbus fic

Scarry fic

Lavmione fic

Contempt-verse fic (Kinktober?)

Contempt-verse fic (Christmas?)

The Christmas Prince 2

Goals I've cut: mostly Year of the OTP. I wrote Again (and Again) and Lovestruck to fill YOTP prompts, but while it seems fun, it's just too much. I have been panicking in the back of my mind about what to do for a March prompt and it's just not worth it. I don't want to feel obligations to finish things out. So I'm going to remove the Year of the OTP tags from those fics and try to forget I ever heard about it. The part of me that must finish everything it starts is deeply unhappy, but I need to scrub away all sense of needing to finish it, so I don't beat myself up when I fail.

The downside is that, with the idea of doing Year of the OTP and posting a new fic every month, I would definitely have reached 100 HP fics this year! I'm ever closer to that goal, but...if not this year, then certainly next year. There's no rush, really. Also: even though the OCD part of my brain rails at this a bit, I should at least celebrate that I do have 100 works on AO3! If we could my astro meta and my old Marvel fics, I'm actually at 103!!!! (Still trying to talk Brian into accepting that win.)

The thing is, I still do a lot, even if I don't get everything I hoped or planned to do done. Other plans for the year include:

More rec lists! (And I've already done rec lists for this year so everything here on out is gravy!)

More general meta (have I done this yet? Who knows. I'm sure I'll feel inspired sometime.)

More HP Astro posts (already done! All else will be bonus!)

2 fests to run! HP Chan will wrap up next Monday, and that same day HP Fruit Fest starts!

Reading and commenting! I've already done that! And I hope to do more!

Learn bookbinding! I still have supplies to gather, but I started doing test prints of short fics to play with programs and typesetting and printing and such. That's a start!

Mostly I just want to be involved in fandom. I want to interact with my community and chat with my friends and meet new friends. I want to give as much to the fandom as I can, in whatever form I can, be it recs or meta or fics or what have you. Or even just fangirling hard on Discord servers! It would be fun to do more podcasts this year (hint hint @careofmagicalshippers and @fanficmaverickpodcast LOL.) Or...idk, what else can I do? Idk, but no stress to me! I'm here to have fun and spread love.

And I need to keep that in mind. And give myself the love of self-care. And focus more on what's fun and what inspires me over how productive I am, or being self-critical.

Do I take fandom too seriously? Mayhaps. But only because I love it so much!

Anyway, 10 points to your House if you made it this far. Leo Moon = need to share. So thank you for letting me share with you!

[kngbri]

[ !!! ] ACCOUNT REVAMP.

MUSE CHANGE! TeenTop’s Changjo to Day6′s Young K/Brian

Everything posted before this notice is from the old muse, Changjo. Everything posted from now on will be for the new muse, Young K.

URL CHANGE: CJONGH TO KNGBRI

Due to loss of muse for Changjo, I will be dropping him as a character. I tried really hard to work with him, but I just couldn’t bring myself to feel motivated to write him no matter how hard I tried or how many times I attempted to get interactions going. Instead, I will be switching this account to a new character, Brian/Young K of Day6. I’m almost done with the theme, and from there I will post an ad and hopefully get interactions going for him. 

I feel much more motivated to write for Brian Young K, and it makes me feel happier to write for him than Changjo. I truly enjoyed everyone who I interacted with as Changjo, and I really hope we can keep interacting together as Brian instead. Thank to everyone who read this note, and I hope to write with you all in the future as Brian/Young K!

[bloodyhell-lucifer]

Daddy is the devil | Lucifer Morningstar

Pairing: Lucifer Morningstar x fem!reader

Summary: Reader is one of Chloe’s best friends and they haven't seen each other for a long time so the decision was made. Finally a sleepover at Chloe’s house since Chloe has a day off of work and Dan took Trixie with him to have some dad-daughter time. What they didn't know is that Lucifer will come with unexpected visit and reader’s shirt will cause such a mess.

Warning: language, smut, unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it), praise kink, daddy kink, +18

Based on this request: Hello, I hope you are doing well, I would like to politely request a one shot (or more if it inspires you, you do you) from Lucifer, you can do whatever you want with it, reader insert, oc, smut, no smut, totally up to you but I would like it to involve Lucifer meeting/seeing the reader/character (preferably female, gender neutral is also fine) wearing that crop top from Blackcraft that says “Satan Is My Daddy” please and thank you

Notes:

Thank you so much for this request sweet anon! I couldn’t wait to write it down because this idea was so cool.

To be honest it’s my first real one request so I’m pretty excited and also this is my first smut so I’m not so proud about it. I think I don’t know how to write them. Someone teach me?

If there are some mistakes let me know because English isn’t my first language so as soon as possible I’ll correct it.

If you would like to send me a message, ask me about something or send me a request about imagine then the link is in my bio so feel free to message me! I would like to know you better and read your ideas and write them down😄

If you guys like my shitty writings you can follow me for more. I’ll be posting new things sooner than you think and thanks for so much activity under my posts and all the follows, it means a lot and I love u so so much xx

You and Chloe had everything planned for tonight. When you were talking on the phone to discuss the details you decided to have a movie night with some alcohol. You bought some wine, chips and sweets for you and your friend to have some snacks. Feeling of excitement was huge about finally seeing your friend after such a long time. You showed up at Chloe’s door about seven pm ringing a bell to her door. After few seconds the door were open and Chloe lean out from behind of it.

“Oh my god hi girl, so good to finally see you.” she enveloped you in a big hug wrapping her hands around your neck.

“Hi Chloe, long time no see.” you hugged her back. With a gesture of her hand she invited you inside and you stepped in.

After two hours you two were slightly drunk and making fun comments over character that was on the screen of tv during the movie.

“So tell me Chloe, some time ago you were taking to me on the phone about that guy you were working with that just have some attitude and always have something to tell and joke about. What was his name again? Lucian?” You asked her taking other sip from glass of wine.

“Lucifer to be exact. His name is Lucifer.” on her face appeared frown and she raised her brows. “Why you asking?”

“Just asking. You like him?” Hint of concern could be felt coming from your lips.

“Of course I like him. I work with him. He’s my partner.” she responded and nervously began to rub her hands against her thighs.

“You know that’s not what I meant. Is he that handsome that it’s bothering you?” you got up from the couch and headed to the kitchen to pour yourself another glass of wine since you finished the last one.

“Please stop. He’s definitely not my type. He’s arrogant, has got a big ego and always have that stupid smile on his face every time we go somewhere.” She folded her arms over her chest and rolled her eyes.

“Oh I hope I’ll meet him someday. I want to know who’s working with my best friend.” you winked at her and laughed along Chloe.

“Some day for sure.” Chloe was praying that this whole Lucifer topic will end with that. “Tell me you have someone?” She tried to change the topic of that conversation.

“Of course not. Some time ago I had a date with this guy named Brian but it didn’t go well and I lost hope for finding someone.” You said going back to couch and putting your glass on the coffee table that was in front of you. “Listen I’m gonna go and change because this jeans are so uncomfortable and I’m losing my shit with them” You grabbed your bag and went to bathroom to change. You picked your normal pjs which were just crop top with caption ‘Satan is my daddy’ on it and black bottoms.

“Oh Jesus Y/N what a shirt” Chloe blurted as soon as she saw you.

“It’s just a crop top Chloe. Can you just chill? We are already drinking a second bottle of wine and you still seem so stressed about something.” You declared after seeing her sitting so tense. One of the movies you’ve chosen was still playing in the room and none of you was watching it so Chloe switched it to music channel.

“Y/N I’m so sorry. I know I screwed this up. I’ve been stressed about work and Trixie and I don’t know what to do. I hoped I will invite you, we will have fun together after long time and this feelings would go away, but I guess it doesn’t go away and I can’t have fun. I messed up” she sighed and got up from the couch to just stand in front of you having her hands on your shoulder.

“We’re all humans after all, Chloe. I get it and I understand. You don’t have to worry. We can talk about it if you want and we still have time to make it fun. Go get change into your pj’s and and I’m expecting you turning back with a smile on your face.” You smirked to her and went up to set new snacks on coffee table.

When Chloe returned she didn’t have time to say anything because the bell from the door rang immediately.

“Did you invite anyone else?” You asked curiously.

“Of course not. Just you and me. No one else.” She added going to the door to check who was that. You were just standing right behind her.

She opened the door and Chloe saw the the last person she wanted to see today.

“What are you doing here?” She hissed and it was obvious that she didn’t want that person’s presence. You still couldn’t see who that person was.

“Oh don’t be so rude detective. I was in the neighbourhood and I thought that I’ll stop by with a visit.” You heard men’s strong deep voice with a British accent.

Chloe was so tired of this. She didn’t have strength to fight with that man and let him in and then you saw him. The man was a lot taller than you, shit he towered over you. You were so shock seeing that handsome man that you though that you were having a hallucinations seeing a Greek god. He had pitch black hair with little stubble. His hazel brown eyes were twisting into yours like he wanted to see every inch of your soul. Of course his devilish smile was there too to give him another hundred points to looking too fuckin’ good. He was dressed in fancy black suit and black button up that hugs his body so perfectly. You could see from distance that under all that suit he must be having a nice, trained body. Is that legal to look that handsome? You though to yourself.

“Bloody hell detective, I didn’t know you were having a company.” He sent you an evil grin and came into your way. Chloe stood there and she was about to say something when that man spoke to you.

“Hi, my name is Lucifer. Lucifer Morningstar.” He stepped closer to you and took your hand in his. He kissed the top of your hand.

“Like the devil?” You asked and you didn’t know if to laugh or to start panicking.

“Don’t bring my dad into this darlin’. Yeah, like the devil.” He still was having that smirk that could knock you off of your feet by any second. “And you are?”

“I’m Y/N” you gulped suddenly feeling naked under Lucifer’s gaze.

“Oh that’s a real beautiful one” he responded and lean in just to be few centimetres away from your figure. He took one of strands of your hair and put them behind your ear whispering to you. “I really like your shirt baby.”

You wanted to say something, anything but you just couldn’t. You didn’t want to believe that is was that guy Lucifer that you were asking Chloe about.

“Okey enough, Lucifer. Leave Y/N alone. What do you want?” Chloe closed the door behind him and asked Lucifer with frown on her face and furrowed brows. She had her hands on her hips and she really looked like she was not in the mood for such things.

“I said loud and clear I came just to check on you, but now as I see your friend I might want something.” He chuckled and looked at you again. You were so intimidated by his presence that you were looking down at the floor in that moment with blush creeping onto your cheeks.

“Can you stop being the perv that you actually are? If you don’t stop you’ll have to leave.” She urged staying in the hallway. Chloe really was pissed off.

“Okey dokey.” Lucifer raised his hands up in a gesture of surrender and he stepped back from you and went to the living room and you and Chloe follow along.

“Okey ladies, let’s start the night properly” Lucifer loud voice echoed through the room and you already had known that you gonna regret it later.

Chloe told you and Lucifer that she had enough of drinking and that’s it. She was not the one to convince so you and Lucifer were left to the alcohol that still was in the house. After another two bottles of wine and another two hours later in the night Chloe’s phone started buzzing and within moments she went to grab it and answered the call leaving the room. You knew you two were pretty drunk but you could still manage with yourself. Lucifer on the other hand after that two hours ended up with his shirt half unbuttoned and messed up hair after you challenged him to do so. You couldn’t get your eyes off of him sitting like that with his legs spread out and your whole body was screaming to straddle his lap. You though you were going to drool yourself at sight of his muscular torso. You felt pretty damn wet in your panties after sights like this.

“Guys I’m leaving for now. I’ll be right back but Dan called me saying that Trixie is burning up and probably having a fever. I’m going to pick her up. I have already ordered a taxi. Please don’t do something stupid. Y/N, I’m counting on you” Chloe shouted to you putting on her shoes, already changed and slumming her front door shut.

“Guess we have some time alone sweetheart.” Black-haired man said to you turning his head towards you. He put one of his massive hands on your thigh and you sighed after his touch touching your sensitive skin. Your knees were touching and you felt shiver running down your spine. His face was millimetres away from yours. The pad of his thumb running across your bottom lip making you tremble. Your breath hitched as Lucifer smirked at you.

“What do you say baby girl? I know you want me.” He seductively admitted. His deep voice echoing through your years. You felt like you were in trance. Thoughts and consequences be damned, you wanted him more than you’d ever wanted anything, and fuck anything that was in your way.

His thumb moving away from your lips as he was leaning in closer to you. His lips ghosting over yours. His hands cupped your face with his two hands caressing your cheeks. Both of you starred at each other. Your eyes fluttered closed as Lucifer laid his lips on yours. He kissed you passionately, your lips moving in sync. Lucifer’s eyes fluttering closed as well. He grabbed a hold of your hair pulling at them causing a moan felt from your lips as the kiss began to got deeper and needer. You decided to make a move and straddle his lap. His fingers moved from your jaw to your hips digging into them harshly. Your fingers quickly unbuttoned the rest of the buttons on his shirt. Your hands didn’t waste time to trail down his muscular torso what made him groan into the kiss. You broke the kiss first moving your head down towards his exposed chest, pressing your lips against it. You trailed wet, sloppy kisses down his chest, then down towards his stomach. Stopping above the waistline of his pants. Lucifer smirked down at you, as you got on your knees. Looking up at him, as you undid the button of his pants, then unzipped the zip pulling his pants down, as well as his boxers, you freed his growing bulge. Lucifer let out a hiss, as his cock sprang up, while you bit your lip. You stared at his big cock in awe making your way back to the couch to sit next to him.

“You like what you see baby girl? Would you like daddy’s cock in your tight, little pussy of yours? He asked grabbing a firm hold of your jaw making you look him straight into his eyes.

“Hell yes, please daddy” you said arching your back to get some friction from your actions.

Lucifer lowered you to the mattress, your back met the rough material of the living room’s couch. It felt so inviting, so intimidating. You wanted that so badly, your entire body screamed for pleasure. You felt air leave your lungs because of the handsome man has begun to kiss your neck. Your chest were heaving, you raised a hand to the base of his neck and held him there as he sucked strong marks onto your skin. Little moan left you, while your body began to surrender to him.

“You’ll be in hell soon darlin’. Sorry baby but this shirt needs to get out with rest of your clothes but it’s so beautiful and welcoming.” He quickly made you get rid of your clothes quickly. When Lucifer bended down while still keeping his brown eyes locked with yours his tongue swiped a lick atop your breast, then immediately took your stiffened tit in his mouth to suck. His other hand worked on massaging your other breast and you forgot about everything around you and let your body take over as your mouth produced another groan. That’s when he decided to pull your nipple lightly in between his teeth.

“Oh, fuck,” you exhaled the curse in ecstasy.

“Naughty girl aren’t you.” Lucifer grinned, but his tone suggested he’s aroused with your language. His hand ran down the plane of your stomach and slipped down to feel your pulsing desire. You could see it in his eyes how pleased he is at the amount of slickness he felt coating his fingers. He toyed with your clit in deliberately slow circles, and you whined at his touch while moving your hips to receive more stimulation. But Lucifer’s fingers went on to explore further inside you, and you couldn’t hold back the gasp that left your lips as he began to stretch you. He bended down again so that his face is above yours, cologne so strong yet soothing. Lucifer’s kisses were hot and needy. His tongue made a reappearance and became acquainted with yours. Your next gasp bled into a groan into his mouth when he added another finger.

“Yeah, please daddy, I want your cock so bad inside me.” you practically begged.

His fingers may be removed from your sopping heat, but in their place, Lucifer’s bending cock slided between your legs to coat it with your wet pussy. Dark haired man finally entered you. Your back lifted off the bed as you let out a lust-filled cry. It was a tight and delicious fit with your muscles constricting around his eager girth. The man’s lips twisted up at the sound and creates his own unbridled groan.

“Spread your legs wide, babydoll. Take the devil all in.” He was so big you didn’t even know how you can adjust, but your body found a way to relax enough for Lucifer to slide in deeper.

Your eyes squeezed shut at how he stretched you fully, but your voice begged him to move, to give you more. He went on to create a steady rhythm with his hips and all with that filthy comments on how tight and perfect you felt around him. You made another desperate noise as you continue your ascent, which prompts him to ask between grunts, “Speak, love. What do you need from daddy?”

“Your big hands with your fingers daddy” you somehow told with filling voice your need amidst your hedonistic sounds.

“It’s going to the direction I didn’t know it’s going” Lucifer laughed with devilish smirk upon his face.

It was what you need after all, the extra stimulation to bring you closer and closer to what could be the strongest orgasm of your life. In a series of ‘yes’s and curses, you reached another plane of existence. Flashes of white light grew behind your eyes while your mouth widened. Lucifer, in turn, exhaled a shaky and pleasurable moan as your body repeatedly constricted and pulled around his cock.

“Oh shit, doll, just right there.” He came inside you, hot and fast, and you feel the descent of your high flow through you. Every part of you was warm and exhilarated and thoroughly pleased. When Lucifer pulled out from you, he rolled over back onto the couch. His grin read that his own desires have been fulfilled. You knew you got yourself into a deep shit and there’s no way going back.

[eponymous-rose]

Talks Machina Highlights - Critical Role C2E131 (March 30, 2021)

Tonight’s guests are Liam O’Brien and Sam Riegel!

Brian points out that a lot of Caleb’s greatest fears have come to pass. Liam: “It’s funny, because he’d kind of believed for a while that those things weren’t going to happen. After a while, he got complacent.” He notes that it was extra wild because everything with Trent popped up again in the midst of that complacency. And how did it feel to be defiant toward Trent? “I think Trent successfully made Caleb question if Caleb really was in control“ at the dinner party. “I feel like anything that I do is part of his plans for me, or is that just gaslighting? I’m legitimately scared of that dude.” Sam: “Of Matt?” Liam: “Sure.” He highlights the disconnect between knowing that the M9 is mechanically powerful and could possibly defeat Trent in a dice-and-stats battle, versus fearing him in a story sense and being convinced he can do almost anything.

Sam, on Luc’s death: “That was brutal, man. Matt Mercer is a-- he hates children! Clearly. He actively sought to kill a child in the campaign in as brutal a way as possible. He hates children and wants them dead. Canon. No, but to RP, that was horrible.” He highlights that so much of Veth’s arc has been about trying to get back to her family. “We had to choose something and we thought we were making the right choice. It was all Veth’s fault, and it was pretty rotten. My heart was beating pretty fast, and I certainly didn’t want to have my son die live on the stream. I don’t know what Veth would have done. That’s the end, that’s over. It’s almost worse than when your own character would die. This is something that would also kill Veth.” After the episode was over: “just shaken. I also didn’t know what to do next! That felt like a turning-point moment for my character, weirdly so close to what we assume to be the end arc of this campaign. I texted Matt later that night and was like, that’s it, Veth’s out, I’m tapping out.”

There’s an interlude in which Sam discovers a new dream to record an episode of this show from his Peloton. Dani informs him that she will not be inviting him back.

On Astrid, Liam: “I literally don’t know what she’s doing. I know that she’s dangerous, she always was ambitious, and there’s not been a moment where Caleb let his guard down with her. He’s not trying to reestablish what they had. He cares for the both of them, for Astrid and Eodwulf. He thinks about it a lot, still. He can’t tell how much she buys into everything that she experienced and is now living as a full-grown adult. He suspects that she’s bought in and is not going to change things, because she believes in the system, as much as he’d like to peel her away. He does believe that they want what’s best for the Empire, and stopping whatever wants to come vomiting out of a hole in the frozen north is good for everyone. And they’re powerful. They’re not trustworthy, obviously. But there’s enough at stake to make it worth it. He could imagine a situation where they fight each other to the death.” He was convinced Astrid was going to stop them when they left the tower and was really shocked when she held back. Sam: “Not me! I’ve trusted Astrid since day one. She’s the greatest! I sent a letter to her, she’s very nice, I think you guys would be a nice couple. I believe every word she says.”

On having to decide on Veth deciding to go off and save the world after Luc’s death. “Like I said, I was ready to be done. And then I decided somewhere in there that that’s not very D&D. So I thought I’d leave it up to somebody else, so I asked Caduceus to decide for me, essentially. She knows she’s putting her other family in danger if she doesn’t go. It’s an impossible choice, you know?” Liam: “I love watching you grapple with it, because you’re a lovely father and love your kids.”

On the Sanatorium, Sam: “That was brutal, man. Matt lulls you into a sense of complacency. We’d forgotten that Caleb was a stone-cold killer! It had been a while since he went on a murder spree. Still got it!” Liam: “I never meant for this character to be perfect sunshine.” Brian: “You don’t say.” Liam: “He’s very not-perfect, and I think in his brain, he was going in with the impression that they needed to get in and get out as soon as possible. The place is crawling with people with magic ability, and I didn’t have faith that we wouldn’t be sussed out or something wasn’t going to blow an illusion.” Everything was about getting out of there as fast as possible.

Did the conversation with Yeza help with Veth’s decision? “First of all, every conversation with Yeza is a beautiful one. Every time she talks to Yeza, it makes her feel good. In some ways, she’s gotten to the point now where she knows Yeza’s going to be supportive, she knows he’s going to allow her to do what she wants, but maybe that’s too much. Maybe she needs to not listen to him, basically, and be like, no, you need to be selfish now, dude, you need to say ‘come home, I’m sick of you leaving’. At a certain point, being supportive can turn into being enabling.”

Cosplay of the Week: Jester in the snow! (liljerbear47, photography by kairiceleste on Instagram)

On Trent’s motivations for chasing Caleb: “I really don’t know. The simplest explanation is to just hammer down the nail that’s sticking up. It has crossed his mind that all high-level wizards are in danger of their own ambition and egos, so it’s occurred to him that Trent might have the same kind of ideas that Halas had in the past, and maybe Caleb was always meant to be another body to jump into. Maybe in some sick, disgusting, twisted way, he wants him to be his successor. I am thinking of the next campaign, without getting too deep in, trying to do something that is much more ride-along. Caleb is very, very specific, and I thought long and hard about all the different pieces on the chessboard for him. For campaign three, I’m looking forward to seeing what happens.”

Dani: “Do I need to be keeping lore on your fucking ads?”

On the cursed dagger: “It was a tricky one, because in campaign one, one of the characters was under the influence of a cursed weapon, but it interacted with him and he knew what it was and what it did. And it affected his gameplay as a character. For me, Veth didn’t know what it was, ever. I as a player knew what it was doing, but Veth didn’t know at all. So it was kind of like my dirty, dark secret for many months. I knew this thing was coming perilously close to killing me, but my character didn’t know enough to bring it up to her friends. Nobody ever asked! So I was like, well, I guess this thing’s just going to kill me one day, and it’s kind of going to be a surprise.” Liam: “Sam, you love danger and self-destruction so much, you might as well be Mollymauk.”

On the fight in Yasha’s sequence, Sam: “You gotta put a character in your storm giant creature. It was so fun! It was so great of Matt to involve us in this encounter. It would’ve been fun just to watch, because Matt would have made it amazing and Ashley was sweating bullets, which is always fun to watch.” Sam notes he felt guilty, but Liam was going for the kill. Liam: “Matt’s gotta be careful about giving me that kind of story beat. I do not fucking care, I just fucking flip, I’m like, well, I’m going to destroy you, and I have no qualms about it. It’s too much fun!”

The Beau/Yasha tower date was in part inspired by not being able to give gifts as easily this last year. “This thing that we do together is a gift, but I love finding these moments, like the book for Jester and the tower for Yasha and for Beau. I really just wanted to give both of them a little magic for a night. I wanted them to leave this-- we’re trying to be as entertaining as possible, but shit is having an effect on all of us too, and I wanted them to have an escape, a great place to escape to.”

Fan Art of the Week: an amazing group shot, plus Marion, Yeza, and Luc! (vocaz on Twitter)

On choosing Essek over Trent, Liam: “It would have been so interesting and awful and great! Essek and Astrid and Eodwulf are everything that Bren used to be attracted to that are terrible for him. Essek, hopefully he can with time find a way out of the hole that he dug himself into, but it was only two months ago where he was found out and his ambitions came crashing down around him. Long-term, I have high hopes for him, but I think it’s going to be hard.” In contrast, Astrid and Eodwulf are still “deep in the shit. It would have been really hard to navigate, but fun to play at the table. We made the right choice with what we went with. Essek’s just getting started, and Caleb doesn’t trust him entirely, because he was burned so hard not too long ago. He’s still more trustworthy than the other three. So it’s the better choice. While Caleb has all these ties on the other side, they’re really fucking dangerous. So if you have to choose, you choose Essek. But fuck that die.” Sam: “Veth, much like Sam Riegel, makes instant decisions about whether to trust someone or not and sticks to it forever. Astrid, 100% trust. Eodwulf, 100% distrust. Essek, completely distrust. I still don’t think he’s a good guy. Ikithon? Trust. 100%. Because you know where he’s coming forward, you know what he wants. I still want him dead, but I trust him.”

On Veth’s post-adventuring plans: “Veth is probably still too in it right now to think about what comes next. I, Sam Riegel, have a good idea of what I want Veth to do post-campaign.” Brian: “Maybe you shouldn’t tell us. Save it for the show!” Sam: “All she knows is she can’t do this anymore. It’s very unhealthy to be battle-wounded every other day. It’s fun for a while, but college has to end at some point, and she’s gotta go home.”

On Frumpkin changing appearance and returning to the Feywild: “I don’t know what I’m going to do, but the way it feels now for Caleb is that he feels too enmeshed in everything that has happened, and too much good has happened, and too much needs to happened, that that really narcissistic, selfish goal has the risk of harming everything else, which is more important. And that’s how he looks at it now. So he’s gearing towards letting everything from the beginning of the campaign, and where he started, go, and trying to figure out what use he’s going to be now and what he’s going to do if they’re not all dead. If Matt throws that shit down, I don’t know what I will do, I think about it a lot. But turning Frumpkin white and saying you’re free either way is him preparing to let go of everything he’s been holding on to for a really long time. He’s addicted to that idea that he can fix himself, and we’ll see if that hard choice gets presented, what he might do. But where he stands now, he doesn’t think that’s going to be reality, and he sees a way that he can be of use that he never really anticipated before, so he’s slowly shifting gears towards living with the pain he was trying to remove.”

On the last request scene and confidence heading into Aeor, Sam: “I feel like that’s a good request. I think all of us realized that if we die, that probably bodes badly for the world. I feel like all of us are at a point now as characters and as friends, that the first order of business would be to take care of everybody else’s shit, although we probably have different ideas of how to do that.” Liam: “I want the Empire to be healed, Caleb has all these memories of his parents and what they wanted for the world, and he wants that too. It’s clearly not in place now, the system needs to be broken and replaced. That could be a part of Caleb’s sunset. I don’t want Caleb to die, so maybe he can work on that after. As everything starts to shake out and we start heading towards our destiny, Caleb’s just free-floating. He’s not even going after the same thing he started for. So he’s looking at Veth’s family, and Luc specifically, and seeing that’s me, that’s a little boy in the Empire.”

[illfoandillfie]

Out of Context

Request: First of all, congratulations on 1,000!!!! Could you do a a sequel to Interloper where maybe an interviewer is giving her shit for having once been a groupie and Bri Rog and Deaky defend her and have amazing sex after at like their hotel 😂-foursome anon (I’m back)

Interloper / Snapshots From Before (Prequel)

Pairing: Roger Taylor x Brian May x John Deacon x Fem!Reader

Warnings: SMUT (18+), gangbang/foursome, oral sex (m and f receiving), anal sex, tit fucking, light choking, slightly dom reader, cheer up sex, some spanking, double and triple penetration

Words: 6,145

A/N: This was another request from back at my 1000 follower celebration last year. It’s been sitting half written in my drafts since then and I finally felt inspired to finish it lmao. Foursome anon I hope you’re still around and you see this!!

Blurb Advent: Day 10

Taglist:  @vee-ndetta​ @atomic-watermelon @kellypenac @labessieisallama​​​ @deakyclicks​​​ @jennyggggrrr​​​ @drowseoftaylor​​​ @hannafuckingsucks​​​ @i-cant-hangout-im-drumming​​​ @queenmylovely​​​ @ilovequeenmorethanyou​ @johndeaconshands​​​ @borhapbois​​​ @stardust-galaxies​

Doing press wasn’t easy, especially when interviewers insisted on questioning you all separately. You preferred having at least one of the boys to back you up. They’d been dealing with the whole interview process for so long now they knew how to avoid answering things they didn’t want to, knew how to deal with rude reporters. But it was all new to you. Perhaps that was why this particular interview had gone so badly. There was no Freddie to make the right snide comment, no Roger to get pissed off on your behalf, no Brian or John to squeeze your knee comfortingly or take over when you go tongue tied.

Things between you and the rest of the band had been going much better since Freddie had locked you in that room together. It didn’t happen overnight, there were still lingering tensions. But any badmouthing they did of you was out of your hearing which you much preferred. Gradually, as the tour wore on, there were less tensions. They got used to having you around, began including you in their games of scrabble and their not-quite-awake conversations over hotel breakfasts. Until one day, in the final leg of the tour, when Freddie admitted to you quietly that he hadn’t overheard any whispered comments for nearly a week. “And here I was thinking we’d never get there.” “Oh hush, darling, I told you from the beginning they wouldn’t hate you forever. Sure they took a little longer to come around than I had anticipated but it all worked out in the end. And now when you tell them the execs have asked for another full album featuring you, they probably won’t kill you.” They hadn’t, of course, though you’d worried for the safety of everyone involved in making the decision. Roger looked as if he were a second away from punching the first person to talk to him.

They took less time to calm down though, especially after they saw how nervous you got before the first interview. Your agent had decided some preliminary press would help build excitement for the album before the songs were even written. Calls were made, journalists were found, and before you knew it you were facing a crowd of people vying to ask you their questions, cameras flashing the whole time. It was a lot. More than pushing you into the deep end, you’d be thrown to the bloody sharks. Any lingering ill will the boys had for you vanished after that. They’d all thankfully been there too, had drawn the attention to themselves rather than let you struggle to answer everything on your own. After that they’d kept an eye on you during the smaller interviews. Mostly the reporters were happy to talk to you all together and, as long as you said one or two things about how excited you were to be working with Queen again, and how much fun touring with them was, you could get away with letting them take lead. But every now and then you got stuck with some jackass who wanted to quiz you solo. And this interview, this horrid interview, had been one of them.

Roger pushed the magazine away from himself, letting it slide as far down your kitchen table as it would go. “She’s a fucking bitch that reporter.” You looked down at the magazine, still open to your interview, the headline alone making your stomach turn. “No, sorry, that’s an insult to dogs. She’s a fucking cunt.” “Rog,” “No, that’s an insult to vaginas. There is no word strong enough for that poor excuse for a journalist.” “Roger, sit down.” Roger shot Freddie a dirty look but sat down anyway, his knee bouncing with restless energy, “Sorry. I’m just pissed off.” “Yes, we gathered that, thanks Rog,” “She took everything I said out of context, you have to believe me.” “We do, Y/N, we do,” John said softly from beside you, rubbing circles on your back. “It started well, I swear. Just the usual questions y’know, what’s it like working with Queen? How does it feel to be singing next to Freddie Mercury? Were you nervous about touring with them? Can you give us any hints about the new album? All the things that usually come up that Freddie coached me on how to answer, and I was doing fine. I had my prepared answers and there was no stumbling over words or anything like that. I thought I’d finally got the hang of it all and then she asked me to elaborate on what it was like working with you. I’d already told her the usual thing – it was fun and y’know blew my mind and all that. But then she asked how it compare to being your groupie.” “You didn’t answer her did you?” “Christ no, Brian! Jesus what do you take me for?” Brian held his hands up in apology. “I told her that it wasn’t relevant, but she kept asking, one question after another thrown at me and no matter what I said she didn’t stop. All sorts of stuff, like which of you was the best shag, and if I’d only wanted to be your groupie because I hoped it would lead to my own album, and if I was still offering my services,” you made air quotes around the words, “accused me of using you for my own gain and asked if you were the first band I’d tried it with or if you were just the only ones gullible enough to let me. I tried to tell her no and that I wasn’t going to answer those questions but she just kept going and then she told me to get used to the attention and left. I guess she didn’t need my answers to write a whole article about it.” “Which of us is the best shag?” Brian repeated the question though you suspected he wasn’t just checking he’d heard you correctly. The others all fell quiet, waiting to see if you’d answer. “Really Bri? That’s what you got from that?” “Right, right, sorry, not the important part. Look, it’s not as bad as you think it is.” “Bri’s right, love,” Roger said, much calmer than he had been before, “there’s nothing of substance in here. Like this quote, as for the fun Ms Y/L/N mentioned was had on tour, one can’t help but wonder just what she meant. Could the stories about nights spent playing boardgames be covers for debauched, drug-fuelled, orgies the likes of which would make a pornstar blush, I mean, there’s nothing there. It’s all conjecture and anyone worth a damn will see right through it.” “But some people will believe it,” “Maybe, yes,” Freddie said, “but it’ll blow over. We’ve all been in the same place you are at one time or another. If anything this officially makes you one of the band.” “Yeah, Y/N, it’s all just spiteful rubbish.” “Thanks guys, but I think I might just call it a day, go back to bed. Stay if you want, I don’t mind. But if you leave lock the door behind you.” You stood and headed to your bedroom.

The four boys stayed quiet until you were out of your room but you heard their hushed voices and hissed comments through your bedroom door as you pulled off your jeans and unclasped your bra from under the baggy jumper you wore. It took about five minutes before there was a soft knock on your bedroom door. “Y/N, can I come in?” You contemplated feigning sleep. “I know you’re not asleep.” You sighed and sat up, hugging your knees to your chest, “Fine, Roger, come in.” “Freddie’s gone to make some calls,” he said, standing just inside your doorway, hands in his pockets. “Calls about what? It’s out there now, there’s no getting it back.” “No but we need to make it clear to other journalists that those kinds of questions won’t be answered in any future interviews, and hopefully we can make sure that parasite never gets to come anywhere near us again.” “Isn’t that mean to parasites?” Roger chuckled, “getting over it already, see,” he sat on the edge of the bed and placed his hand on your covered knee, “I know this sucks, and I get that you’re ashamed, but I promise it’s not as bad as it feels right now.” “I’m not ashamed.” “What?” “You said I’m ashamed of it but I’m not.” “Oh. I thought-” “I’m a bit embarrassed because obviously I’ve never told my family what it is I got up to when I went to all those concerts and now they’re all going to know, lord knows some of them will believe the worst of it. And I’m pissed off that I didn’t stand up for myself more. I just let her keep cutting me off and talking over me when I should have told her to fuck off or at least called her out for being a prudish arsehole who probably only attacked me because she’s jealous I’ve fucked three quarters of Queen. And I’m annoyed that you’ve all been brought up in the article, and she’s questioning whether your good people just because you sept with me. I mean does she expect you all to be virginal saints or something? It’s just frustrating and yes, upsetting. But I’m definitely not ashamed.” “Huh, okay then.” “What?” “Nothing, just, we assumed you regretted sleeping with us.” “Lord no. It wasn’t planned, like she was insinuating, but seeping with you definitely helped me get my foot in the door with this whole music thing. And even if it hadn’t done that, it was still fun as hell and made me feel good. If I wasn’t fucking you I would have been out having mediocre sex with guys I met in pubs and I don’t care how much of a slut it makes me seem, but I’d rather fuck a whole band every single night and actually get off than have a disappointing drunk lay with a guy who’s never heard of the clitoris. Fuck, I’d still be doing the whole groupie thing now, and be perfectly happy with it, if Freddie hadn’t heard me singing that day. That night at the after party, that was heaps of fun.” “Give me a second would you,” Roger stood and walked to the door, giving you another glance before he turned the corner. You watched the doorway, not quite sure what to make of his behaviour but your questions were answered soon enough when he reappeared with Brian and John following. “So apparently we misread the situation,” Brian said, taking the seat Roger had just vacated. John sat cross legged at the end of your bed while Roger flopped onto the mattress beside you. “I can’t believe you’d think I regretted being your groupie. Have you met me?” “In our defence you seemed very upset, what were we meant to think?” “I had a shitty interview and got called a whore in a very public way, of course I’m upset. Doesn’t mean I regret anything.” “Yeah, that makes sense. Sorry, we should have realised. But we have a proposition for you. We actually thought of a way to cheer you up when we first saw the magazine this morning but then when we got here you seemed so sad and we didn’t want to make you more upset or uncomfortable,” “What Brian is trying to say is that we have an idea we think you might like.” “Jesus will you two stop beating around the bush?” “Shut up Rog, I’m getting there.” “Y/N,” Roger said cutting off the others before they could waffle any longer, “Would you like to fuck us again?” You almost choked. “Zero tact. What he means is, we thought we could cheer you up. All three of us, entirely focused on making you forget that magazine.” “Wait, I’m confused,” you massaged the bridge of your nose as you tried to catch up to them, “you saw an article that called me a whore and thought it would cheer me up to, what, be your shared fucktoy again? Yeah it was fun but-” “No, no, no, that’s not what we mean,” John said, “you’d be in control of how it all happens. It wouldn’t be like last time.” “So, you’d be my whores?” “I guess?” “The point is,” Roger chimed in, “we want to make you feel better. If that means making you cups of tea and buying you a box of chocolates that’s fine. But it could also mean you having three cocks and all the orgasms you can handle.” You looked from Roger to John to Brian and then back again, trying to work out if they were joking or not. But they all seemed sincere enough for you to actually think about their proposition. It wasn’t what you were expecting to hear from them, and it hadn’t crossed your mind until they mentioned it. But now that they had, you had to admit it sounded fun. Last time had been fun and that was when you’d been passed around and used mercilessly, so having them all again, but with a bit more say in how it happened, could only be better. Plus, part of you wanted to prove how unashamed of your groupie history you were and what better way than this? “Okay, I’m in.”

“Do we need to set any ground rules?” Brian asked. “You all know my safeword,” “Saxophone,” You laughed at the chorus of eager voices, “Yes, exactly. Other than that I don’t think there’s anything to worry about. Not like this is new exactly, is it?” “Well, no, I s’pose not.” “Exactly. And if there’s anything I don’t want I’ll tell you. So you’re,” you pointed at Roger, “going to kiss me now, while you two undress,” “Getting right to it, excellent,” Roger laughed, as he pushed himself closer to you. He didn’t waste any time, leaning in to kiss you right away. It started off a little too soft for your liking but as soon as soon as you made it clear how into it you were, kissing him back harder and pressing yourself closer, Roger reciprocated. His hands wandered down to your chest as you felt Brian and John get up, following your orders, their clothes left where they landed on the floor. Roger’s hands were soon replaced by Brian’s as he knelt behind you, and you found your head being pulled around so he could kiss you too. Roger took the opportunity to undress as Brian and John caught you between them. You couldn’t tell who was removing your clothes, only that once your jumper had been pulled over your head John was kissing you. He leaned back, tugging you along so Brian could pull your underwear off, his hands caressing your bare bum. “How do you want us?” John asked, brushing your hair back behind your ear. “Um,” you looked around at the three very naked bandmates waiting for your word, “One of you is going to eat me out. Don’t care who but I am going to cum.” “Yes Ma’am,” John laughed, lazily saluting you before rolling you onto your back and shuffling down between your thighs. You were taken by surprise when you felt his tongue run between your lips, expecting nips on your thighs and the teasing puff of his breath as he hovered just out of your reach. But he was clearly taking the job of cheering you up seriously. Brian and Roger weren’t any different, settling into the spaces on either side of you, their light touches only enhancing the feeling John had set off. You felt their fingertips on your breasts and in the ends of your hair, tugging just enough to send a shiver down your spine but not enough to make you gasp in pain. “So what would you like from us, love? What dirty little fantasies are going through your head right now?” Roger tapped his finger on the middle of your forehead. You opened your mouth but a small oh as John latched onto your clit replaced the words you’d been intending to say. “Think we’re going to need a little more than that, Y/N. C’mon, tell us what you want. Do you want us to just take turns fucking you, filling you up over and over and over.” “Or are you thinking more along the lines of last time? Taking two at a time because one cock isn’t quite enough for you now?” “Try three,” you managed to get out as you slid a hand into John’s hair to hold him in place, “want you all at once.” “Jesus,” Brian swore, dropping his lips to your neck. “I’ve been a piss-poor groupie considering the stories that reporter’s peddling. Everyone’s going to think I’ve been taking all three of you at once constantly, but we’ve never actually done that, have we? Might as well embrace my slut title and change that,” “Let us work up to it, Love” Roger said softly, recapturing your lips as he rolled your nipple between his fingers. You whined, partly from Roger and Brian’s attention and partly because John raised his head, your hips rising slightly at the loss. “Guess I should start stretching you out then,” he said offhandedly as he licked his fingers, the same way you’d seen him do a hundred times before while playing. You couldn’t stop the moan that rose up in your throat, the sound only making John chuckle against you as he lowered his head and resumed his focus on your clit.

It only took a few more minutes to have you swearing through your first orgasm. The two fingers John had inside you enough to send you over the edge as they brushed against every sensitive spot they could reach. Your neck tingled where Brian had marked it and your nipples were stiff peaks, extra sensitive to cool air after he and Roger had delighted in torturing them with teeth and tongue and fingertips. “How was that?” John asked, slowly withdrawing his fingers when he was satisfied you’d finished. “Fuck,” was all you could say, the three boys laughing, John dropping a kiss to the inside of your thigh. “Think you can handle more?” “Actually Bri I think I might be done,” “Oh. Really?” “I’m kidding.” “Thank Christ. I’m so fucking hard there’s no way I could get my pants back on anyway.” You laughed and pushed yourself to sit up, “Poor thing. I suppose you can use my cunt for a bit.” “Classic guitarists always getting first go,” “Shut it drum boy, I was about to offer to blow you but if you’re going to be like that,” “No, no, I didn’t say anything.” “He did Y/N, I heard him, blow me instead,” “Ignore Deaks, he doesn’t know what he’s talking about,” “Like a couple of – oh!” you were cut off as Brian grabbed you round the middle and wrenched you onto your hands and knees, “children. A little warning next time please,” “Sorry,” Brian leaned forward to kiss your back as his fingers trailed up the inside of your thigh, “but if I didn’t move this along we’d be stuck arguing about who gets to blow who forever.” “N-no we wouldn’t,” you stumbled over your words as Brian’s long, talented fingers pressed into you, “I made up my mind, Rog in my throat.” “What about me?” “Don’t worry Deaks, you’ll get your turn. If you want you can spank me though, or bite me or pull my hair or whatever else you can think of. You know my limits. Also we’ll need lube so if you want to go digging through my bathroom draws and find some you can. Might be a reward in it if you do.” “Spankher, please,” Brian nearly whined, “always makes her cunt so tight.” “Think I’d rather claim that reward thanks” “Alright then I’ll spank her,” “Guys! Can you stop arguing. I have holes enough for all of you, that’s kind of the point of this. And, Brian and Roger, if I don’t get both of your cocks deep, deep inside me within the next thirty seconds I will kick you both out and let John have his way with me on repeat.” A moment of silence accompanied your statement. You saw Roger, eyes wide, look over at John and then to Brian, and could only assume they were returning his dumbfounded look. “Twenty-nine, twenty-eight, twenty-seven,” Roger blinked as if waking from a daydream and hurried to kneel in front of you, one hand gliding over the length of his cock as the other reached for your hair. Your mouth fell open in a gasp as Brian suddenly filled you, holding your hips tight as he bottomed out, which gave Roger enough opportunity to push himself towards the back of your throat. There was a shift in the mattress as John got up but you were a little too preoccupied to hear the door open and shut or the sound of him rummaging through your bathroom. You only realised he’d returned when a sudden, loud spank hit you and you knew Brian’s hands were still occupied with your hips. For their parts, Roger and Brian were keeping you busy, skewered between them, not sure whether the noises coming from your own throat were moans or gags or wordless begging. Brian breathlessly laughed as John spanked you again, “So fucking tight. Bit harder?” “Y/N?” You made an assenting humming noise and nodded as much as Roger’s cock would allow which John rightly took as permission and so hit you again, harder than the last.

It was an intoxicating feeling, taking two cocks at once, all the while wanting more and knowing you’d have it before long. Brian fucked you hard and precise, as if his goal was to split you open from the inside out. Had it just been him and you alone you would have found yourself creeping further up the bed. It had happened a few times before, leaving you either hanging off the edge of the bed, or with your hands over your head and pressed against a wall in an effort to keep from banging your head. But all he managed to do was push you further onto Roger’s cock, making you gag and choke more often. Roger didn’t seem to mind that though, giving as good as Brian, firmly gripping your hair so that you couldn’t even attempt to move off him. The added impact from John’s hand just made you shiver and moan. He was the one who sensed you were getting close though, reaching under you to rub your clit and give you the extra push you needed to get over the edge. Brian wasn’t too far behind you, groaning as he tried to keep fucking you, his hips faltering as he twitched inside you and spilled his seed. You felt his hands on your backside as he spread your cheeks, leaning down to spit on your arsehole before he pulled out of you. Once Brian was finished with you, you tapped Roger’s thigh and he pulled back. “You okay?” he asked, stroking your cheek with a knuckle. “Brilliant, just thought that since I can move a bit easier, I’d take over. You look like you were close.” “Fucking yes I was close,” You giggled as you readjusted your position to be more comfortable, once again taking Roger’s cock between your lips. This time you pushed yourself lower, taking him deeper, making Roger swear above you. You pulled back again, hollowing your cheeks until you sank down once more. A strangled moan seemed to catch in Roger’s throat and it spurred you on. You reached out to cups his balls, massaging them in your hand as you took him as deep as you could and hummed. The hum turned into something akin to a squeal (though slightly muffled and choked off at the end) as the sticky cool of John’s lube covered finger teased your arsehole, tracing circles around it before slowly sinking into you. The sight seemed to be enough to finish Roger off, one hand on the back of your head to steady himself as he shot his load down your throat, pulling out towards the end so the last of it dribbled down your chin. “Now me?” John asked, pushing a second finger in with the first as Roger let you go. “Stretch me out a little more and then yes,” “Oh, no, I’m not ready for that yet. I want your tits.” “What?” “Your tits, Y/N. Turn around,” His fingers left you and you were free to move, shuffling on your knees to face him. John pressed down on your shoulder pushing you to sit back on your knees and adjusting your angle so he could slide his lubed up shaft between your breasts. He pushed them together with his palms and slid them up and down his dick as he rutted against you, spreading the sticky lube over your chest. With a slight smile at John, you  dipped your head a little and kissed the tip of his cock as it moved towards your lips. “Fuck, been waiting so long for this,” he groaned, “gon-na make a mmm-ess all over you.” He gave up on speech as he neared his released, communicating exclusively in grunts and increased speed until he finished, covering your chest and sternum in ropes of cum that dripped down your skin.

You laughed as John fell back. The hardest you could remember laughing in a while. “What’s so funny?” Brian asked, reaching out to rub your shoulder. “Just thought what that reporter would say if she could see me now, naked and dripping in spunk,” you managed to get out between giggles, “her face would be fucking priceless.” The boys laughed along with you, glad you could see the funny side of the situation with the article. “Does that mean you’re feeling better?” “Yes Rog, but I’m still not done with you.” “What did you have in mind?” “Well,” you crawled over to where Roger was sitting, leant back on his hands, and placed your hand on his throat, tilting his face away from you a little so you could lick a long stripe from his jaw to his temple, “I meant it when I said I wanted all of you.” “Never doubted it, love,” he sounded a little breathless. “Just let me know when you’re all ready to go again. Not you Rog, I can see you’re ready.” “I’m good too Y/N,” “Yeah, same,” “In that case,” you shifted your position, lining yourself up with Roger and sinking down on him, squeezing his throat a little harder as you adjusted. “John, you still got that lube?” “Yes, uh, yeah here,” there was the sound of a cap flipping open and you leaned forward encouraging Roger to lay back so you could give John better access. “Hey, Rog, can you spread your legs a little wider,” “S’pose so, just don’t kneel on my bollocks or anything,” “God give me a second, the thought of that just made mine try and jump up inside me,” You giggled as John shuffled closer, using his fingers to spread some more of the lube over you and to keep stretching you out. “What about me, Y/N?” “I haven’t forgotten you Bri. I want every inch of your cock shoved so far down my throat I can feel you for a week. Just let me get used to the others first, yeah? Still feels kinda odd having two of you at once since we’ve not done it much.” Brian nodded, contenting himself with running his fingers through your hair as he waited. John, having pulled his fingers from you and slicked up his dick with more lube, sank into you slowly, his hand on your back to keep you bent forward. It suddenly felt hard for you to pull in a new breath as you tried to adjust to the feeling of both of them, especially when John gave an experimental thrust, fucking you slowly to make sure it felt okay for everyone. Brian talked softly, reminding you to breathe and telling you how well you were doing, until you were better in control of your lungs and ready for more. “Are you sure you want me as well?” “Yes. Lets show that parasite just how far I’ll go, huh?” Roger laughed, “that’s the spirit.”

Brian didn’t need more convincing than that, though it did take a little trial and error to find the best way to accommodate all three of them. Brian tried perching his arse on the headboard but Roger whinged about “seeing nothing but Bri’s ballsack flopping about. And I know you see things when you’re gangbanging but that is too much.” In the end Brian stood next to the bed by Roger’s head, enough to the side that Roger’s view wasn’t impeded but still close enough so that the angle wouldn’t strain your neck. He gathered your hair into a messy ponytail as he pulled your mouth onto his cock, letting you work yourself further down his shaft as slowly as you needed, checking in with you every now and again to make sure you could take more. The other two were mostly still as you adjusted to Brian, though once or twice they’d given a small thrust or shifted slightly and made you whine. Once you had Brian buried as deep in your throat as he could go you paused for a few seconds and then pulled back again, strings of saliva breaking on your lips. “How was that?” “Good,” you gasped, “New. Kinda weird but very fucking good.” That didn’t really explain anything but you weren’t sure how to describe the nearly overwhelming fullness, the sudden heat, the tension in your belly which you couldn’t pinpoint as either anticipation or nerves or just because you were stretched open on three cocks. “And that’s without us doing anything,” “I know,” you grinned, “I’m excited. Why didn’t we try this sooner? But now you guys can cut loose. I’m not sure I’ll be much use in like riding you properly or whatever. Just don’t know my brain can focus on keeping both of you in my holes while I’m thinking about blowing Bri well. So, just fuck me however you can and we’ll see how it goes.” “Don’t worry, we’ll make you feel good,” John said, rubbing your back softly. “Yeah, course we will, love. And if ends up being shit then we can just take turns instead,” You nodded and took a deep breath before leaning forward to take Brian again. You controlled the pace once more, bobbing up and down his shaft, sucking on his tip, as the other two figured out their rhythm. It was a strange sensation to start. It felt clumsy and more than a little awkward, especially when John mentioned how he could feel Roger inside you. But that eased as they adjusted and worked out how best to fuck you. John held your hips as he plunged into you, each thrust harder than the last as his confidence rose and he found out what you liked most. Roger’s hands moved over your skin rather than staying in once place, palming your breasts and teasing your nipples between his fingertips before sliding down your side to grasp your waist and then back up to your breasts. You were rocked on his cock with each of John’s pounding thrusts, which only made you moan around Brian’s. You let instinct take over there, one hand stroking from his base up to meet your lips as you swallowed him deeper. His hips jolted when you whined or moaned and before long you dropped your hand away from his shaft, instead grabbing his arse to keep yourself steady. He pulled you off him again and you could feel the spit on your chin. “Forgot what a fucking incredible cocksucker you are.” Brian groaned, “But can I take over? Fuck your throat?” “Yeah, okay,” You had time for another breath and then you were pushed down again, right to the base. “There we go,” he groaned, pulling on your hair, “Gonna make you feel so fucking good.” Your hum was choked off and ended in a gag as Brian ground his hips into your face. That seemed to be the tipping point though. The moment all three of them forgot about awkward views or who was positioned where and became entirely consumed with fucking you deep and hard. You were glad to let them lead, grabbing you, pinching and pulling and squeezing every inch of you they could reach. And all the while spearing you on their dicks, keeping you in a cycle of mounting pleasure as they found all your most responsive spots inside and out. You felt your orgasm building again, the heat rising, getting more urgent as you got closer and closer. The sounds you made were muffled by Brian but that didn’t stop you making them, moaning with every pounding thrust. As you neared the edge Brian pulled you off his cock so they could all hear you properly, their encouragement mixing in your lust addled brain and creating a wall of noise that pushed you over the edge with a loud cry. And yet they didn’t stop. Brian waited until your orgasm was reduced to aftershocks that made you wince and whine and then cut off your air as he entered your throat again, resuming the long, deep strokes that made you gag until he came, holding you down as he emptied himself completely.

As soon as the other two didn’t have to worry about giving Brian access to your mouth they adjusted your position, John pushing on your back until you were bent over. Roger attached his lips to your throat as they simultaneously fucked into you, the change of angle pushing Roger’s cock against you in a way that had you seeing spots. You cried out again as Brian lay a slap on your arse. “Fuck, fuck, fuck,” John grunted as he came too, unable to hold out any longer though he didn’t withdraw from you either. His hips slowed a bit and he whined softly but he kept fucking you. “Rog,” you panted, trying to get him to finish too. “You’ve got another one in you, c’mon love,” You whined but nodded, the familiar sensation already tightening in the pit of your stomach. Again the three of them encouraged you, John wrapping his hand around your waist to find your clit, Brian reaching under you to squeeze your breast as his other hand came down on your arse again. They gave you no option but to cum, shivering between them. Finally Roger let go too, moaning into your ear as he filled you up.

It took a moment to disentangle everyone, John being careful not to go too fast and hurt you, but finally you were able to collapse together, sweaty and panting, spread out over the room. “So, cheered up now?” Brian asked from where he’d lain down on the carpet You peered over the edge of the bed at him, “Think so. Thanks for that, it was fun.” “Any time, love,” Roger chuckled from the end of the bed, patting your knee, “and I mean that.” “I’m not you groupie anymore,” “Never said you were,” “Then what?” “What Rog means,” John cut in from where he’d spread out on you window seat, “is that if you ever need cheering up or to let out some frustrations, we’re here. We’re happy to help,” “Does your help always involve a gangbang?” “Not always,” Brian laughed. “Well, a lot of the time,” Roger added with a wink. “I’ll keep it in mind,” you chuckled, “I’ll have to face my family at some point and there’s a high chance I’ll leave upset and frustrated so, we’ll see. Wonder how Freddie’s getting on with those calls.” “I’ll go give him a ring and find out,” Roger said, half groaning as he stood and stretched. He didn’t bother grabbing any of his discarded clothes before he left. “I’ll take Rog his pants,” John sighed as he got up and replaced his own underwear, exiting the room with an eyeroll, Roger’s underwear pinched between his thumb and pointer. “And I’ll...stay here?” Brian said, “unless you need anything?” “Nah, I’m going to jump in the shower. Let the other two know that’s where I am, would you?” “If you’re doing that, can I have the bed?” “Sure Bri,” you laughed, “as long as you promise to change the sheets when you wake up.”

[mirkwoodshewolf]

On set visits; Queen x reader x Borhap boys pt. 2

*Author's note*

And here is part 2. And that's all I've got of the Rock Angel for now. Hope you all enjoy this special binge read of the series. Soon enough the story will come to an end after a few more chapters (I've had the last chapter written for like 2 years now) but I hope you all enjoy this chapter as well as the binge reading I have provided for you all. Until next time, stay healthy, stay safe, and anyone getting their vaccines GOOD LUCK!

Taglist:

@plethora-of-things

@simonedk

@waddles03

@ixchel-9275

@psychosupernatural

@jd-johndeacon-or-jackdaniels

@queensdivas

@bohemiansweede

@queendeakyy

@queen-paladin

@geek-and-proud

@isabella-bby

@labessieisallama

@5sos-wdw

@onebigfangirlworld

@wormzteef

@ssa-sadboi

@naturalswifty89

@starswin

___________________________________________________________

*Meeting the new Rock Angel. Filming continues*

A few days later after bonding with the actors playing my boys, I came to any day of filming I could (outside of my album recording and touring with Queen and Adam). Now the boys promised me and I knew they would follow up with it, the young actress they got to play me in as a cameo for the Live Aid sequence.

I was talking with Miami when we both heard a knock and that's when Graham King came in.

"I've got her."

"Bring her in." I said. He opened the door wider and soon came in the young woman came in.

"You wanted to see me Mrs. Kline?"

"Yes my dear come in." I said. She came in and took a seat on one of the producer's chair. "I wanted to speak to you guys privately about some things that have come up. But first I would like to know your name my dear girl."

"Ashley. My name's Ashley Johansson. But my friends call me Ash."

"Lovely to meet you Ash, from what I saw up there you—you blew me away."

"Uhh thank you. And can I just say I've been such a big fan of yours. My mum always played your first album on repeat every day when she'd take me to school. But I thank her for that cause your story has just been such an inspiration to not only me but her as well."

"I'm flattered Ash. I'm always happy to hear that I inspire people, even when I feel like I'm not really doing anything. All I do is just bring my music out into the world and try to give voice to things that other's don't deem important."

"That makes you an inspiration Mrs. Kline." She said.

"Oh please Ash darling, call me (y/n)."

"Okay....(y/n)."

"Now then straight to business. As you know Hollywood's always wanting to create biopics of anything and everything. And while I've been aware of both Queen's story as well as Elton's life being made into films. I've always been reluctant in getting my story out, but from what I saw a few days ago I feel like I might've found the right team to do just that. So my dear Ash, tell me this; who do you trust the most in Queen?" she looked at me confused but she soon realized just what I was doing.

"Brian was asking me tons of questions but that was the only question Roger ever asked me."

"And what did you tell him?"

"I told him, that.....All the members of Queen are my family. But if I had to pick, Roger has always seen each side of me. Whether it was the happiest moment of my life, or the darkest day. He's seen my true colors that none of the other band members had seen." I smiled softly and said.

"What happened after you said that?"

"He—he might not have wanted anyone to know but—I could swear I saw him wipe a tear from his eye." I smiled and lowered my head.

"That's my papa lion alright." I muttered. I looked back up to Graham and Ashley and continued, "After seeing the hard work you all have put into Queen's story, I've come to the decision along with my manager and former boss Miami, that I'm willing to sign off the rights to the film to you Graham King. And I want you my dear Ash to play me." They both looked at me in surprise.

"You're—you're serious? You-you want me to play you?"

"I can think of no other person. My uncle and father figures chose well. They—after all knew me better than I knew myself." I heard Miami chuckle softly.

"Thank you (y/n)."

"But there are conditions that I seriously must emphasize on."

"Whatever you want."

"Okay first; I will be heavily involved with the project."

"Done." He said.

"Second, there are some events I will allowed to be shown. But I absolutely refuse to have the stalking episode I was forced to suffer with be heavily shown. It can be touched on but I want nothing else about it in the film. It was hell for my family and my children were scarred for almost ten years, especially my daughter."

"It was horrifying. In my Folklore and true crime class, someone actually did a story on him in the aspect of why celebrity stalking should've been taken more into consideration." Ash said. I closed my eyes heavily trying to compose myself when I felt a hand grasp mine.

"If anything more is spoken about in regards to my Angel's stalker, the project will immediately be terminated." Miami said. I turned to him and he looked at me and nodded firmly as he patted my hand comfortingly.

"The writer's will be informed on it immediately."

"And in regard to Queen's casting, make sure that those four young boys are involved with the project. I love all four of them, they are—everything I remember when I first worked with Queen."

"It shall be done. After this film wraps up and the premiere at Wembley Stadium, you and I can meet at Abbey Road to discuss further more on the project and all the rights that need to be signed." Graham told me.

"Graham King, you've got yourself a deal." We both shook on it. A pact forged that a movie about the Rock Angel would come to place.

Months passed and I was busy touring alongside Queen and Adam for a time, up until Brian decided to pop in on set for a surprise visit. He told me that the boys were now filming the Rockfield farm studio scenes. Now this was one filming session I definitely didn't want to miss.

Brian and I drove up to the location in Hertfordshire, a charming little place known as Stocker's farmhouse and cottage. Since the real Rockfield farm studios wasn't suitable for filming, and ridge farm closed down back in 2003, Stocker's was the only place left.

Coming up onto the filming location, I began to see it looking sorta similar to what Rockfield was when I had used it earlier in my career.

"The studio definitely chose the perfect setting I must say." I said to Brian who was driving.

"Indeed. When the lads and I first came to Rockfield farm we couldn't believe that that was what Fred had in mind."

"But the wide open spaces sure do provide little to no distraction. Guess that's what made a Night at the Opera so successful to you guys."

"You really think so?"

"I know that's how it was for my first album. Plus why do you think your 5th album is the most talked about in regard to your earlier works."

"Suppose you do have a point." He shrugged. After about ten minutes of driving through the country roads, we finally arrived at the farm and the barn house there made me think of the real Rockfield farm studios.

"Not quite the same but the atmosphere of it just brings back memories doesn't it?"

"It does indeed. Shall we go surprise them?"

"Yes, lets." He shut the car off and we both exited the car. We walked towards the barn house where the guys must already be filming right about now since there wasn't really anyone outside. Once we got up to the door, Brian slowly and quietly opened the door but gestured me to go in first.

"Oh lady's first." He said.

"Thank you." I walked inside and Bri followed behind me. Inside I saw some of the crew walking around setting some stuff up. All around it was like the actual recording studio Rockfield farm had. From all the pictures I remember seeing in either magazines or even Brian himself, it was like I was transported back in time to when Queen recorded "A Night at the Opera".

"You know some of those amps and even Roger's kit we used at the time are here."

"Really? So you and Rog donated some of the actual gear?"

"Yep. Since the fans will be nitpicky about certain aspects it's just a fun little way to give them a taste of some of the real equipment. Even Red's here."

"No way. No wonder why you've been using those Red special copies throughout the tour. But Bri are you sure it's okay? I mean I know how protective you are of Red."

"She's been in the best of care."

"Right, right with your mini-copy. I swear even out of the wig and the clothes I can still see you in Gwilym. Are you sure you didn't have another child with a different woman besides Chrissie?"

"I'm positive." He assured me.

"Oh and speak of the devil there's your clone now. Why don't you go say hi while I go find the rest of the little rascals." I patted his shoulder and walked off. As I walked along I saw a familiar figure wearing a long blonde hair sitting next to another young man wearing long auburn hair that went past his shoulder.

I shook my head and walked up to them saying.

"God I swear it's like I transported back in time to 1975." They looked up and proclaimed my name. I was soon tackled in a sandwiched by Joe Mazzello and Ben Hardy.

"What are you doing here? I thought you were touring?" asked Ben.

"I was. But Brian decided to do a little surprise visit so I figured since I missed seeing you four so much, I figured I'd tag along and see how it's coming along. So what all have you done since I was last here?"

"We did a scene in Miami's office to represent Queen getting back together before Live Aid, a concert at Madison Square Garden, and the recording studio scene with Mike Myers." Joe explained.

"Now for the next couple of weeks we'll be doing some of the Rockfield farm recordings as well as the Bohemian Rhapsody music video, when Freddie joins Smile, and the "I want to Break free music video." Ben finished.

"Oh now that last one I've got to see for myself." I said grinning ear to ear. "I'll bet you four are gonna rock the drag look just like my boys did. Especially you Ben." I teased as I gently pinched his cheek.

"Yeah Benjamin I can't wait to see you in that skirt." Joe teased as well pinching his other cheek.

"Alright, alright you two enough." He said brushing our hands away and trying to contain his blush. I giggled softly.

"When that day comes, do I got some stories to share with you all about that day."

"We look forward to hearing them." Said Joe.

"And I look forward to telling them. Just let me know if you boys ever get bored of an old woman ranting on about the past."

"Never (y/n). We could never be bored of you. We love having you here, you've given us a lot of support and advice for playing your coworkers and family members." Ben said as he leaned his head against my shoulder.

"Yeah. We could never get bored of you. The day we get bored of you is the day the four of us stop being Queen fanatics. And this movie only keeps increasing our fandom tenfold each and every day." Joe said as he leaned up against my other shoulder.

"Aww you boys are sweet." I kissed Ben's cheek first which made him blush and softly chuckle.

"You lucky dog! I wanna Rock Angel smooch!"

"Then pucker up Joey dear." He puckered up his lips and I leaned in but at the last second I kissed his cheek which made him pout like a child. I laughed and said. "Sorry my dear, but my lips are reserved for one man."

"Can't blame a guy for trying though right?" he asked hopefully.

"No. I guess not. Now Benjamin, if you'll come with me real quick I would like to spend a little one on one time with you." I wrapped an arm around him when Joe said.

"Better not seduce him away from me!"

"Please Joe dear like I'd ever steal a man from you!" I cried back at him. We walked outside and walked towards the cottage. "Ben I've been wanting to ask you something."

"What is it?"

"When we first met; I had mentioned that I was looking forward to seeing you play the drums, but I noticed that you seemed a bit—tense." He froze right there on the spot. I turned towards him and stood in front of him. "Benjamin. Is there something you'd like to share with the class?"

"Well I—uhh.....when I, when I went to auditioned I—might've said that I......knew how to play the drums. But I've....never drummed a day in my life."

"So you lied? You lied and ended up getting the part of playing my only father figure in the world?" I snapped.

"I'm sorry (y/n) I just really wanted the job. But I worked hard and trained over ten hours a day in the 8 weeks rehearsal time before we shot Live Aid. I just love Queen so much and I—"

"Ben." I pressed my finger to his lips. "Relax. I knew you lied the second day of filming. Roger told me."

"Did he mention the prank that Rami tried to pull on me?" I nodded as I hummed. "Damn rat."

"Oh trust me. When it comes to certain secrets, Roger cannot keep them forever. Especially when his lion cub gets involved in wanting to know." I removed my finger and cupped underneath his jawline. "But when I saw you perform the entire Live Aid sequence, it hardly seemed like you hadn't drummed a day in your life. While I don't condone for liars, I appreciate that you took the time to study just how exactly Roger drums."

"It wasn't easy. But he was supportive and he even gave me a mini drum lesson. Of course he had to step back and say 'alright. Show me what you got'."

"That's exactly like Roger. He always did the same to me whenever he gave me a drum lesson. I remember when he taught me how to play 'Don't stop me now' back when I was an intern and he told me to play it all the way through."

"Jesus that's rough."

"Depends on how you look it. Guess I got on the lighter end than you did cause he's always had a soft spot for me. But his heart's always in the right place when he mentors. Just ask his son Rufus. That boy takes everything after his father. Not just his looks but his talent too."

"Yeah. Roger has given me some good pointers on how to strike the cymbals on a certain song. Or how to properly spin the drumsticks."

"Knowing how to keep the heartbeat going. The drums are the center of the band. If one beat is off, the entire song can go to shit."

"That was always his number one rule to playing the drums. Drilled that into my head every time." I sighed reminiscing the old days of my tutorial sessions with my dad. "So he really was like your father?"

"Yeah. Out of all the members of Queen, Roger was the one I was drawn to the most. It also helped that he loved me just as much as I did him. Always there to comfort me at my lowest moments, but there to celebrate and keep me grounded when I was higher than a kite. Roger Taylor has and will always be my papa lion."

"That's so cute you guys called each other that. Anytime you came up in conversation, Roger always called you his lion cub."

"Either that or his lioness. Lioness is more for the moments when my true strength comes into play and I do something world changing. Lion cub is like a private thing between us. God I can't believe I confessed to him being a lion to me when I was drunk. But if I'm being honest, I don't regret it."

"I can see you don't, my little lion cub." I looked at him and he just gave me Roger's cheeky grin and that familiar twinkle in his eyes just made my heart flutter.

"Cheeky." I grinned. He smiled and shrugged playfully.

Yeah I know he may not look exactly like Roger when I met him but there are some mannerisms that Ben has that just made me think of my adoptive father.

We continued to walk into the cottage cause I wanted to see what they did to the inside of it. There I saw Rami sitting by the piano in the now wearing the long black hair that Fred had at the time. Jesus without the tache, he looked more like Freddie than I could ever imagine.

However that happiness soon turned to dread and absolute disgust as soon coming right beside Rami was a young man who looked like someone who I had loathed my entire life. The one man who made my life a living hell throughout my years with Queen, the poison who nearly destroyed Queen and exposed my secret to the boys.

It was Paul Prenter.

Rami and Paul were chatting away with each other and I felt sick to my stomach.

"(Y/n)? You okay?" Ben asked me.

"Excuse me." I muttered as I passed him. I trudged right over towards Rami and shielded him. "Stay. Away. From him you snake!"

"E-excuse me?" he asked confused. "I don't know what you're talking about." Typical Prenter.

"Don't play games with me Prenter! You might've fooled Freddie once but you will not do it again! I lost him because of you. You ruined his life! And I swear to you I will make you pay for it. I'm not that little girl anymore!"

"(Y/n)! (Y/n) calm down. He's not really Paul Prenter." Rami tried to reason with me.

"Freddie please I'm doing this to protect you!" I then gripped the collar of Paul's shirt and dragged him aside. "You lying son of a bitch! How dare you show yourself again!"

"Wait! Wait I'm not Paul Prenter!"

"STOP LYING TO ME!!!"

"(Y/N)! (Y/N) (M/N) KLINE LET. HIM GO!!" I turned to see Brian as well as Joe, Gwilym and Ben along with some of the crew staring at me. Brian stomped towards me and pulled me away from Paul and he said to me in a stern voice. "The real Paul Prenter is dead. He's been dead just as long as Freddie has. That's an actor playing him. Alan Leech."

My adrenaline came down and when I looked at 'Prenter' again to see that it wasn't the Paul Prenter I knew. For one thing this guy was much younger, the tache wasn't as thick as Paul's was, and his eyes weren't as cold as I remembered Prenter's, they shown with absolute fear.

Oh god.....what have I done? I collapsed to the ground trembling with regret as tears formed in my eyes. I buried my face into my arms as I softly wept. It was then I felt Brian's arms wrap around me, his head gently resting on top of mine as he rocked me slowly while I wept.

*3rd Person POV*

Rami, Joe, Gwilym and Ben looked at each other before turning towards Allen who spoke not a word but was just as worried as the four main ensemble cast was. Rami first tried to approach (y/n) but Brian looked up at him and put his hand up and shook his head.

After she went silent, Brian helped her stand up and he walked her over to the car. He allowed her to just sit there and have some time to herself. Once he shut the door, the young actors walked up to Brian and Joe asked.

"Is she gonna be okay?"

"With time. Allen I apologize ever so much but you can't blame (y/n). The real Paul Prenter he—put her through hell when she started off as an intern. One thing he did was extremely unforgivable that I don't see why we ever kept him around."

"Brian, she uhh—I know I shouldn't say this but when she was trying to defend me from Paul, she—actually called me Freddie." Brian sighed solemnly and said.

"She still blames herself."

"What do you mean?" asked Gwilym.

"Come with me lads." Brian led them over to the cottage porch and all of them sat down along either the railings, the porch swing or on the two chairs that were out. "As you know everyone in Freddie's life suffered after his death. Some of us still grieve the way we do like Roger and myself. And there are some who became so fragile like Deacy. (Y/n).....she's always lied on the in between stage. She misses Freddie beyond anything no mistake about that, but then there are days when she blames herself."

"Blames herself?" Rami asked.

"Yes. See, when Freddie first told us that he was diagnosed with AIDS. He wanted to keep it away from (y/n), because her career was skyrocketing, plus she had her own family to look after with Kelly and the twins. Freddie didn't want her to worry about him, but one year when we were all in Montreux recording our last album Innuendo, (y/n) allowed us to stay at a vacation house of hers that she had there. That's when she began to deduce just what was wrong with Fred. He told Roger and myself that the poor dear had blamed herself for not being there for him. Because—well truthfully there was a fallout with Queen and the Rock Angel for a time. Now whether we make that into the film is unknown I know writers are always doing rewrites. But she felt like had she stepped up to Prenter or held onto Freddie just a bit longer before turning her back on him, he would've been alive today."

"Jesus." Muttered Ben.

"Poor lass." Allen muttered.

"But she couldn't have known. None of you did."

"And we didn't. Because Fred didn't want anyone to know. It was his personal business and his alone. And although (y/n) says she accepts that it wasn't her fault, there are some days where she says it is. And any reminder of it just sometimes makes her snap."

"I don't blame her. I—I know exactly what she's going through because of my dad's illness. Anything regarding glioblastoma and I just freak out. But—thanks to these guys I.....don't know where I would be."

"We're here for you mate." Gwil said as he patted Joe's knee.

"So you see guys, this film is bringing back a lot of memories for her. Good and bad. So Allen I really hope you don't take offense to what just happened."

"Not at all Brian. Besides after hearing and probably thinking what the real Paul Prenter did, no wonder why she would get defensive around Rami. I hold no grudge against her."

"Thank you. Just—give her time to cool down and then you all can go see her." The five boys nodded in agreement and took the guitarist's word.

*My POV*

After a while once I calmed down and decided I needed to find young Allen Leech and apologize for my erratic behavior. I got out of the car and dapped my eyes with a handkerchief and walked towards the barn.

"Excuse me, Mrs. Kline. We're—not sure it's a good idea for you to be here right now." Said one of the crew members. That's understandable, I knew it wouldn't be that easy.

"It's not that we don't want you here it's just that, well after seeing what happened between you and Mr. Leech. We—think it'd be best if you were to not be on the set for a while." I sighed and said.

"I understand. I was way out of line. But—can you please express my deepest apologizes to Mr. Leech. As well as the boys."

"You can tell me that yourself." An Irish voice spoke up. It was then I looked up to see the five boys themselves.

"You're not going anywhere." Said Rami.

"Mr. Malek, we....."

"We heard what you said dear. Now step away from our Rock Angel so that the six of us may talk." He came up and took my hand and the boys took me into the cottage.

We came into the kitchen area and Rami gestured for me to sit down. Joe pulled out a chair and I sat down while the boys surrounded me.

"Boys; I—what you all had to witness, I have no excuse for my behavior. I am ashamed that you all had to see me act like that. Especially you Allen dear. I—hope you all can find it in your hearts to forgive me."

"I do. Seeing me remind you of someone who—was just known to be such an arsehole and black sheep in Queen's circle, I can see why you acted the way you did. I would've done the same thing too had I seen someone I hate come back and standing before someone who was once a dear friend of mine." Allen said. He came up to me and extended his hand.

"Why don't we forget this whole mess ever happened and start over? Hello Rock Angel, my name's Allen Leech." I looked up at him and smiled as I took his hand.

"Pleasure to meet you Allen darling. And please like I've told these guys, call me (y/n)." he smiled and that's when I stood up and hugged Allen and he hugged me back.

"Aww now that's sweet." Rami cooed.

"We're all friends now." Joe said with a smile.

"Yes. We're all friends. Now get in here you lot, group hug boys!" they all laughed and cheered as we all came together and group hugged each other. Forming a new bond and a new start with one another.

Thankfully the studio actually managed to let me stay the rest of the day after that whole fiasco (all thanks to the boys but mostly Allen for agreeing to not press charges on me for assault). Of course they warned me that with another outburst like that, not only would I not be allowed on set again, my consultant position would be taken away.

So I was more well behaved than usual after hearing that I would be kicked off the set.

Right now the lads were recording Gwilym's bit for the guitar solo, but what was cool was that the crew decided to allow Brian to play the solo for the fun of it. So as the playback of Freddie's voice came on, Gwilym stepped aside while Brian came in his spot and began playing his guitar solo.

I stood beside Gwilym as we both observed Brian playing the famed Bohemian Rhapsody guitar solo. I even took my phone out and took a video of what was going on. After the solo, Gwilym walked over to Brian and I made sure to get both of them in the shot.

"That's brilliant. I love that." Rami's voice spoke as Freddie from the other side of the recording studio.

"So now what?" asked Gwilym.

"The operatic section." Said Rami. Both Gwilym and Bri nodded. A grin spreading across Gwilym's face as he muttered.

"Ah-huh. The operatic section. Good."

"Of course." Brian said. Jesus just seeing them like this and hearing the same voice come out of them, it really was like we took Bri back from 1975 and brought him here.

When Dexter Fletcher called cut, I stopped my video and said.

"Oh man Jack's gonna flip when he sees this."

"Is he ever gonna come by for a visit?" Brian asked me.

"Yeah I myself would like to meet the famous Jack Kline." Joe said from the other side of the booth.

"Well unlike us where we know when our schedules begin, law enforcement doesn't get days off. Especially when he's going for the Chief's chair. But who knows maybe he might come by for a day if not a few hours."

"I hope so. It's been awhile since we've seen that husband of yours." Brian told me.

"Yeah, I know. Jack misses coming in every day just like the old days."

"I'll bet he does. Or he just misses seeing the love of his life perform and rehearse. Back in the day when you kids first started dating, he'd always have that puppy love look in his eyes as he watched up on stage. Remember the time in Seattle?"

"That was in Houston, Bri. If you're meaning the time he was so distracted by watching me that he almost ended up tripping over the stage, that was in Houston, Texas."

"Oh yeah that's right."

"Alright we've had our fun, now let's do this for real. Gwilym get to your mark. Brian and (y/n), gonna have to ask you both to get out of the shot frame please."

"Good luck Gwilym dear." I said as I gave him a peck on the cheek for luck as Brian handed him his original red special and we both walked out of the frame and stood behind the camera.

The day continued on filming the boys recording the famed song that this movie was named after and I swear to you, it was like I was seeing history happen. Like I was transported back in time to the summer of 1975 and seeing my boys (just five years before they even became my boys, back when I was just one of their millions of fans) record one of my favorite albums.

And even seeing the struggle and perfectionism that Freddie had for this song. Rami truly brought Freddie's perfectionist behavior right onto the camera and it just—had me bewildered. It was like I was seeing Freddie again, hard at work on his masterpiece.

After a long day's filming, Brian and I unfortunately had to head back to the city to actually record an album together that he was helping me produce. Since touring was over for now, the boys and I (yes including Adam) we were all focusing on our solo stuff now till the next tour came around.

And since Bri had some free time after working with a talented young woman, I had asked him to come help produce my latest album 'Resurrection'. Ever since hearing about the Queen film and also hearing that Elton as well was going to make a biopic film, the title was named in honor of their upcoming films.

Because it would show a whole new generation of audiences what their stories were and show them that like a phoenix, Queen and Elton will resurrect because you can't keep down true legendary artists.

So for about 2 weeks Brian helped produce the album and of course he and I would post on our Instagram accounts both pictures of brief videos of some behind the scenes stuff of our partnership together.

"And there she is. Working diligently as ever." I heard Bri said. I looked up from my I-Pad to see him holding his phone, probably taking a video for his collection package he likes to do on certain events on his Instagram.

"Yes and I thought you'd be helping me too."

"I am. I'm your publicity for now, then I'll go back to being your producer." I smiled and laughed as Brian chuckled. He turned his phone onto him as he spoke to his Instagram followers, "As you can see we're both working extremely hard. Now we can't give too much away, but you can expect this album to be just as powerful as her previous albums in the past."

"But we unfortunately have to go now, our special guest on the album has just arrived and like Bri said, I never give away spoilers." I said as I came in the shot now.

"Okay well you heard the Angel ladies and gents, this is us signing off till next time. Bye."

"Bye!" Brian turned off the video camera and exited his account. And just as he pocketed his phone away, my special guest came in through the doors.

"(Y/n)!"

"Pink, my sister how have you been?" Yep you read right. I had reached out to the one and only Pink to come sing a duet with me. For years since she came up on the market, people have confused our voices cause she and I had the same powerful low range vocals.

Our first time doing a duet was—oh gosh I wanna say very early 2000's. I wanna say even just shortly after the 9-11 attack. I wanted to bring up an album that would spark some life and hope into the people of America, my in-laws especially cause when we lost Jared and Gen, the whole family felt like it was gonna come apart.

I auditioned several young female artists to sing along with me but their voices just either weren't right for the album or they sounded too nasally. But when this young woman at the time, an artist barely known came along, it blew me away at how our voices could mold well together.

So with me singing in a higher range and her taking the low range we launched the song 'Death by bombs, (live by hope)'. It was at the #1 charts in America for the entirety of the New York cleanup and became a national anthem. Pink and I were even asked for several years to sing the song every 9-11 for about 9 years.

Now here we are again six years after our last collaboration.

"You ready to do this?" I asked her.

"Angel, I was born ready. Anytime to sing with you is always gonna be a good one."

"Alright then ladies, step into the booth and let's get this song rolling."

"You got it Brian." Pink said enthusiastically as she and I walked with an arm wrapped around each other's shoulders and we walked into the booth together to begin our work.

Another week passed and when I received a message from Ben Hardy telling me that they were about to start filming my all time favorite music video 'I want to break free' I was on the first flight back to England (since I was recording the album in America) to see the shooting for myself.

I walked through the studio and everything came flooding back. The extras in the cow patterned leotards, the design of the music video set but it wasn't until I saw Joe dressed in the same granny attire that Deacy wore that hit me with pure nostalgia.

"Oh my god nana Johanna I did not know you were still alive." I said exasperatedly.

"Yeah, yeah hahaha very funny." Joe sneered.

"No, no Joe don't take my comment as an insult. You look—every ounce from what I remember Deacy looking like the day I came by with my wedding invitations."

"You were passing out wedding invitations during this music video?" he asked me. I nodded with a hum.

"Jack and I decided to come by to see the guys cause I wanted to deliver their invitations personally. And also ask them to walk me down the aisle since—well you probably know."

"Yeah I get it." He said as he came up and placed a hand on my shoulder. "So you really think I looked exactly like John did?"

"Absolutely. All that's missing is a crying girl crying out 'where's daddy! Where's daddy! That's not my daddy'."

"Okay this could be my dirty mind but that sounded—" I playfully slapped him in the back of the head.

"You're right to get your head out of the gutters young man! I was referring to his daughter Laura. I mean I wasn't there to see it, but Veronica had told me just shortly after the shoot that she had brought the kids over to see their father. Of course Michael and Robert were hysterical with laughter, but poor little Laura who was only 4 at the time was crying cause she didn't recognize her dad."

"Awww well if you wanna recreate it, I can call my sister and get my niece on Facetime to see if it'll work."

"As much as I would love to see that, let's not scar your niece up for life. But yeah, Laura kept denying that the old granny was her dad. Until he took off the wig and she recognized her daddy's fluffy hair."

"That is literally the most adorable thing I've ever heard."

"I know. Laura was a sweet kid. She was the one most attached to me when I first met her. She even recreated a bit of my song for my birthday when she was just 3 years old."

"Okay (y/n) seriously stop you're gonna give me cavities at this point." I laughed and said.

"Alright now show me the rest of the boys, I want to see them."

"They all look amazing. Except for Ben." I looked at him skeptically but he just took my hand and led me towards the kitchen part of the set. There I saw Rami by the table in the pink shirt and leather black skirt, sporting the 1950's hairdo and nails that Freddie wore that day. Gwilym by the fridge in the pink nightie and bunny slippers, along with the curlers, and of course Ben in the 'Rogerina' getup.

The same style wig, the schoolgirl outfit with the leggings, the heels. Wow he looked more of a Rogerina than the real Roger did for this music video.

I let out a wolf whistle and that's when the three of them turned towards me.

"Rogerina has returned. The women who makes men drool at her feet and women turn for her. And if my son Freddie were here, honey you would most certainly turn him."

"God (y/n) please stop embarrassing me." Ben whined.

"I shall not. My cousin Rogerina was the talk of the town back home. Of course along with Aunt Brianna and Fairy godmother Frida."

"Is that what you really called the guys when you saw them like this?" asked Gwilym.

"Who do you think started the trend names? Freddie's was—kinda last minute since....well due to certain things going on at that time. But really you guys, I love each and every one of you."

"I'm still disappointed in Ben's look." Joe bluntly stated.

"And why's that?"

"His thighs are too big. Too much rugby."

"Yes Joe I know. I've been trying to slim down as best I could but these thighs man!"

"Not everyone can please everybody Ben. But trust me when I say, fans will love this and will love you as Rogerina. Plus I think you look absolutely beautiful."

"You really think so?"

"Hell yeah. You're still prettier than I am."

"Oh come on now that's never gonna happen. You are an eternal beauty."

"That's what I've been telling her for years." A voice said behind us. No way. It—it couldn't be. I turned around and my ears weren't deceiving me at all.

Dressed in grey shirt with a dark color blazer and dark blue jeans, the greying of his once blonde hair but those warm eyes of his were unmistakable. A wide smile spread across my face as I laughed out and walked towards him.

"Jack!" I hugged him and he hugged me back. I separated but kept my arms wrapped around his neck. "What are you doing here?"

"The case got solved so I figured might as well put some time off and see just what you and Freddie were talking about. So I called up Roger and asked him where the filming was at, and here I am."

"Ohhh you." I leaned forward and we gave each other a loving kiss.

"Awww." We separated from each other and I cleared my throat.

"Whoa. Okay did we just transport back in time?" asked Jack.

"No love. Boys, I'd like you to meet my husband and the love of my life for over 30 years, Jack Kline. Jack, this is Rami Malek, Gwilym Lee, Joe Mazzello and Ben Hardy." I pointed to each of the actors individually.

"It's a pleasure to meet you boys." Jack said with a wave.

"Believe us, it's an honor to meet you Mr. Kline. Brian, Rog and (y/n) have told us many stories about you." said Rami.

"Oh god, if Roger was telling the stories he made me look bad didn't he?" I playfully slapped his chest.

"Not all the time." replied Ben.

"In all seriousness, I must say.....wow this is....."

"I know right? Oh darling just wait till you see the Live Aid sequence Brian managed to record. Don't they just look the part?"

"Yeah. So much so that it's almost scary."

"Ohh and Jack dear, you remember back when George and Jackson were obsessed with Jurassic Park?"

"Lord do I ever. They practically ruined the tape." He said with a groan.

"Well—Joe here, played the young boy Tim in the film." I then saw Jack's jaw drop as he turned towards Joe.

"So you're—you were....."

"Yep. I was little Tim Murphy in Jurassic Park. My first major gig that got my name out there."

"Wow. And seeing you now dressed like this it—you look so much like him." Jack said in awe. I turned to Joe with a 'told you so' look.

"Yeah it was scary to see just how much I looked like him. I even asked my mom if she was up to anything around 1983." Jack laughed.

The rest of the day was spent seeing the boys perform the music video, as well as a couple more stage concerts from both the 70's and 80's. When Jack got to see these four young actors in full Queen costume and hair/makeup, he was blown away. As we were in the back of the extras who were the crowd, Jack kept his arms around me as we watch in awe.

His head leaning against mine as we watched Rami literally become Freddie with every strut, head turn and bent back, se saw Gwilym play a model of the red special guitar just how Brian is known for, Ben working hard in the back with the drums literally playing just like how Roger is known to play. But I know that out of the four of them, Jack was beyond amazed at seeing Joe Mazzello play his former mentor and idol John 'Disco' Deacy.

His bass playing and even doing the funky little moves that John as known to do on a more upbeat song like 'Fat Bottomed girls,' or 'We will Rock you'. We clapped along with the extras and cheered for them. I knew that with what I've seen so far, this movie was going to be—sensational. Just like the band themselves.

Later that night after wrapping for the day, Jack and I were now at home getting ready for bed.

"So, what did you think of it?"

"They picked the right actors. And the right team to work on it. You were right (y/n)."

"Of course I am." I teased.

"Don't get cheeky with me love, you know what I mean. This movie it—it's everything I hoped it would be. I just wonder if—he would've loved it." I looked at my husband empathetically and said so

"He does." I looked out towards the window up at the stars and continued, "They both do." I felt Jack wrap his arm around me and the two of us cuddled up close together and fell right asleep after a long and busy day.

[i-watch-too-many-movies]

5 Favorite First Viewings of July 2021

Quick note: Hi everyone, I'm back, things have honestly been getting better for me, and I'm glad to be on this site full of cinephiles, people that are too horny, and cinephiles that are too horny. I'll be more active on here. But anyway, let's talk about some movies.

Beyond the Valley of the Dolls (1970) (dir. Russ Meyer)

CW: Abortion mention

What a picture. What a gorgeous, sexy, horrifying slice of what Hollywood and star life can do to a bunch of bright-eyed young people looking for success. Also is a critique of how macho nature can ruin friendships and romantic relationships with total ease. I was obsessed with the scene transitions, like Pet pouring pancake mix onto a plate after the abortion scene, or Kelly singing after someone screams before their murder in the opening scene.

Great, campy flick with exceptional music too.

Deep Cover (1992) (dir. Bill Duke)

Laurence Fishburne plays Russell Stevens, a Cincinnati police officer who hopes to do well by the community, to make a difference. He’s traumatized by the death of his substance-abusing father, and wants to make sure that he can help the people of his own town. He goes undercover on assignment as a drug dealer, where his boss orders him to take down the kingpin. Stevens realizes the police’s own failings while on assignment. The racist abuse he takes from Agent Carver, and the realization that the police department is protecting drug kingpins like Gallegos and Barbossa. Giving drugs to Black kids and Latinx kids so there will be less of them. The cops are no different than the drug kingpins looking to make filthy amounts of money.

Fishburne’s performance is excellent, as Stevens feels he has to maintain a stone face so he doesn’t get caught by Jason or Barbossa or any of his cronies, but also he maintains a stone face to try and hide his emotion, his trauma. But when he gets pissed, Fishburne acts it beautifully, as is when he has to deliver a funny quip to counter Jason’s douchebaggery. And the production design, holy fuck, the sets and the lighting.

A perfect neo-noir for the HW Bush years, arguably one of the most timeless commentaries on the era, as well as the police as a whole.

Fast Five (2011) (dir. Justin Lin)

I was torn between including this or Furious 7, but I ultimately went with Fast Five because it felt like an important turning point in the series, it's a great heist film, and it reached the same chaotic highs and genuinely excellent filmmaking that I had been waiting for since 2 Fast and Tokyo Drift.

Fast Five opens where Fast & 4ious left off. Dom is hauled away to prison on a bus. Mia and Brian drive in their high-tech cars and knock the bus over, helping Dom escape. The title drops. Fast Five. It’s such an intense yet short action scene, and dropping the title immediately after it lets the viewer know that this movie is not fucking around. It’s arguably gonna be more intense and insane than the previous one.

And it is. The filmmakers made the decision to use a lot more practical stunt work for the film, and as a result, it leads to, so far, the best action in the entire series, since 2 Fast and Tokyo Drift. It’s not just how it’s shot or edited, it’s the geography of the locations, the rooftop chase echoes the rooftop chase of Jackie Chan’s masterwork Police Story, particularly the way each character bounces from top to top.

And of course, there’s the silliest moment in the movie, the one that matches the intensity and kineticism of a film like 2 Fast, which is driving the Reyes’ bank vault throughout the street, getting chased by corrupt cops.

I know we make fun of Vin Diesel for saying “family” all the time in these films, but there’s a reason we remember him saying all of these impassioned monologues. Because he’s unbelievably sincere, and has so much love in his heart for every single person in the room. Anytime he delivers a speech to any of them, it’s genuinely heartwarming.

This is the film that finally shows La Familia in their best environment, which is working together, in a movie genre that allows them to work together, which is a heist film. And a great one at that.

Last Days (2005) (dir. Gus Van Sant)

CW: Mention of suicide

Several films have been made about legendary rock artist Kurt Cobain, and for good reason. He is one of the most tragic figures in rock and roll. A tortured genius who has written and performed classic song after classic song with his band Nirvana. He was called the voice of a generation, and helped change the face of mainstream alternative rock music as we know it. But with that fame, and all of those expectations came a worsening depression and further drug abuse, and his eventual death. But most of the films about Kurt Cobain ask one question which gets under my skin way too much:

“Who REEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALLY killed Kurt Cobain?”

It was him. He did. And it’s okay, I’m sad too. Thinking that Kurt Cobain was murdered is completely ignoring the depression that he faced. And despite Last Days being more inspired by the death of Cobain rather than actually about it, it feels much more honest than the conspiracy documentaries on his death, wanting to leech off of his dead body.

This is the last installment of Gus Van Sant’s “Death Trilogy”, the previous two installments being Gerry (2001), and Elephant (2003). While I have not seen Gerry, I have seen Elephant though, and love that film for its minimalist, raw nature, and its boldness for not romanticizing the school shooter or the lives they had taken. Last Days falls into that trap once, as I don’t agree with the shot of Blake’s soul climbing up a ladder, that always struck me as cheesy in a film that is anything but.

Last Days is similar to Elephant in terms of the way it is filmed. Its usage of long takes, and still shots of characters doing various things, such as Blake playing his guitar behind a drum set. The way these moments are shot is similar to a Chantal Akerman film, particularly Jeanne Dielman. Where the acts of the mundane are the stars of the film. Blake wanders around an empty house, and the viewer can feel the pain, not just through Michael Pitt’s acting, but from the house itself. Its decay, its paint peeling from the walls, from the soft glow of the lamp that lights his face.

I say this is the most honest film about Kurt Cobain, because, despite the characters technically being fictional (the main character who looks, walks, and acts like Cobain is named Blake), this film focuses on the mental state of a person before they eventually take their own life. They’re still working, still making music, still trying to talk to friends and bandmates, but the depression lingers on. Not once does this film try to make you believe that someone else killed him, because you can see the signs of his own suicide taking place just through the film’s excellent cinematography by Harris Savides, showing his mental state only growing worse through the production design.

And it’s empathetic with him. There’s no judgement for leaving rehab, there’s no finger-wagging at him or the people he was with, there’s just a silent prayer at the end of the film, hoping that he is in a better place than he was.

Sometimes you don’t need to show every event that led you to where you are, all you can show is the moment, which also makes this better than most biopics as well, as it never feels messy or muddled, just showing one moment of Blake/Kurt’s life.

I really loved this film, and I’ll be writing about it in full soon.

The Village (2004) (dir. M. Night Shyamalan)

The Cracked.com/Channel Awesome audience stuck in 2012 will tell you that this was the beginning of the end for Shyamalan. That this was when people stopped taking him seriously, that this was when he became more of a punchline because of his twist endings.

But why?

The Village was released in 2004, deep in the Bush administration, during the early stages of the Iraq War. The leaders of the time were talking about imaginary boogeymen, terrorists that would attack the civilians if they could. Because of 9/11, politicians could get away with these false ideas with the majority of Americans fully believing them. The boogeymen in The Village are “The People We Don’t Speak Of”, monsters attracted by the color red. Yet we find out that they are all costumes made by the Elders of the land, designed to prevent people from going outside the land. They rule by fear disguised as love. They’ve gone through their own traumas through the deaths of their family members, but they’ve decided to completely abandon the lives that they’ve had and have their children living lies.

9/11 impacted American life by teaching citizens to live primarily by fear, to not trust anyone but their own people. And yet, post-9/11, all that increased was not “coming together”, but hate crimes against South Asian people. The rage white Americans had felt led to conservative politicians pushing fear-mongering agendas, and said white Americans blindly accepted. The outside world was progressing, but too many people were fine with living with further conservative politics only regressing American life further and further back, all for the illusion of safety. Meanwhile, the only threats to them were not the brown citizens outside of America they were so afraid of, but the white elders, the white politicians.

The Village explores these fears so eloquently, all while having a terrifying atmosphere, an enchanting score, and brilliant sound design. I enjoyed this movie very much.

Other viewings I enjoyed:

Beavis and Butt-Head Do America (1996) (dir. Mike Judge) (re-watch)

Blow Out (1981) (dir. Brian de Palma) (re-watch)

Clueless (1995) (dir. Amy Heckerling) (re-watch)

Furious 7 (2015) (dir. James Wan)

The Long Goodbye (1973) (dir. Robert Altman)

Lupin III: The First (2019) (dir. Takashi Yamazaki)

Unbreakable (2000) (dir. M. Night Shyamalan) (re-watch)

Velvet Goldmine (1998) (dir. Todd Haynes)

The Visit (2015) (dir. M. Night Shyamalan)

[omegatheunknown]

AEW Double or Nothing 2021

In which the spirit of WCW is alive in confusing and delightful ways and we are left to parse whether overbooking and extracurriculars are offset by having actually very good wrestling happening at the same time.

- Lessons learned from Revolution on the production side? Maybe just cool it on pyro, though the rappelling adventure in the Stadium Stampede showed some of that now-characteristic 'trust us it'll look better on TV' flair. Hot crowd tends to paper over most woes, and the crowd was pretty hot. My one gripe is that the casino theme is hanging around like yesterday's takeout containers. Nothing wrong with clinging to a theme, I just think it's time for season 2. My suggestion? Under the Sea.

*Pre-Card Serena Deeb (C) v Riho for the NWA Women's Championship (***1/2) - Serena Deeb's star has finally risen. She's a remarkably consistent technician and she can get a match out of anyone at this point. She's working at the level of Mercedes Martinez or Madison Eagles at this point, it's amazing that she was overlooked or considered fit only to be a coach for so long. With the NWA belt she has this new swagger, she's basically everything Tessa Blanchard might bring to the table with none of the downsides (Serena has a lot of friends and seems like a lovely person, even!) - Riho's back and here to stay. Her time in Stardom didn't do much for my evaluation of her, which is that there are many better wrestlers that would be better representatives of the joshi style and she's merely pretty good. - The match was very good. Serena showcased a champion's aggression against a sympathetic Riho, they really work well against each other, Deeb's technical prowess against Riho's flexibility led to a very dynamic finish.

*Main Card Hangman Adam Page v Brian Cage (***1/2) - Here the shenanigans start. Brian Cage is on Team Taz, Team Taz has nothing else much to do tonight, so why wouldn't Team Taz flex their muscles, bait us with HOOK, etc? (Because it would be nice to have some variety in the card in terms of a match where one competitor stands across from another competitor?) - Hangman is (checking notes) yeah, still over as fuck, as befits the Anxious Millennial Cowboy. Cage terrifies me, he's a child's drawing of a body builder. He do be very agile for a man of his immense musculature tho. They match up well, Page is biggish for a flyer, Cage loves to play catch. Nothing much to write home about, other than Hangman's beautiful moonsault to the floor and what was overall a very good curtain jerker. - Okay fine, I am curious about Cage's reluctance to lean on the goons, Starks can't come back soon enough.

The Young Bucks v Jon Moxley & Eddie Kingston (***) - I will not be referring to Mox & Eddie as (The) Wild Things because it gives me 'he calls it the wacky line' flashbacks for some reason. - The Bucks have to cheat and abuse Rick Knox's attention span constantly to be on even footing with Mox & Eddie, which is a clever sort of thing that gets washed out by the appearance of LG and Karl Anderson, which again, is cool in a vacuum but was the story of the evening. - Pace was weird - repetitive in eliminating Eddie, then Mox fights back, failed hope spot, Bucks team up, Eddie saves x2/3 in a row. - Mox, unlike Cody (in so many ways,) will probably actually be taking some time off with Renee, which is the kind of thing I would prefer not to know in terms of booking, but they really uh, put him down on the canvas here, and it felt pretty finale-esque.

Casino Battle Royale (n/r, but on the balance pro) - Any changes to the theme of the PPV would likely include changing up the nonsense suit format of these largely joyless slogs. - Obviously anticipating a NJPW talent, or... I dunno, actually -- Lio Rush was a surprise. Got in a quick demonstration of his otherworldly quickness, and you know what, there's probably a fun place for him in AEW. He'll need some friends, of course, feel like Team Taz might fit his temperament. I wonder if he was aware of the Mark Henry news... - Christian does not need to win this kind of match to get a title shot, obviously, but that said it was super lovely to use him to give Jungle Boy the shine. Jungle Boy would be a license to print money if he was even as big as Hangman. - Could register some continued griping about how Penta is not getting his due in AEW but he also literally was dressed as the Joker so I'm low on sympathy on this one particular night.

Anthony Ogogo v Cody Rhodes (*) - I did not like this. It's hard for me to read jingoism as a face move to begin with, and Cody's was egregiously tone deaf and kinda silly yet delivered without a trace of irony because Cody doesn't do irony on purpose, ridiculous neck tattoo aside. - Great argument to be made that Ogogo just isn't experienced enough to be winning matches against Cody. But like, what are we doing here? Cody needs to take some time off, maybe. I thought that's what was happening when he had his mini feud with Penta that really just ended in quick decisive Cody win. I though maybe Cody was being turned when QT and The Factory snapped-- sure, they're a group of impotent player 2s, but Cody is an out of touch elitist with a callous and manipulative streak. Alas, also no. America #1. - Cody is approximately 8 times as tough as Billy Gunn based on his weathering of the one punch man. Match ran a bit long given how little there was to go on. Cody gigged? Quelle surprise. - Cody had the best match on the card like, 3 out of the first 4 AEW events or something, and that was all booking and storytelling. I do hope Cody follows Moxley's lead into a little sabbatical.

Miro (C) v Lance Archer for the TNT Championship (**1/2) - Card's hossiest hoss match, a quick burst reminiscent of a car wreck. Absolutely hit on what it should've hit on but a little slow moving considering it went all of 10 minutes. - I will not complain about Jake the Snake, who I love. And also the gimmick spot, with Miro very astutely yeeting what was definitely a snake in a bag (surely.) back down the tunnel.

Dr Britt Baker, DMD v Hikaru Shida (C) for the AEW Women's Championship (***) - Picked up a lot of steam toward the end but seemed a little toothless (heh) until the last five. - Shida 'deserved' some more time as champion in front of crowds but also it's time to let heel Britt reach her peak, I can't even imagine how obnoxious she can be as the champ, it's going to be great.

Sting & Darby Allin v Ethan Page & Scorpio Sky (***1/2) - Such is the power of STING that I feel like I might be underrating this match... I mean it was an okay match about very simply getting some revenge and the sixty year old man did a very subdued Code Red and a slightly less subdued dive. He's also Sting. They missed an opportunity in calling it the 'Scorpio' Death Drop, but the main takeaway here is you see something like this where it's The Icon and you start to understand why WWE trots out their legends to come out of incredibly still kick ass without bending their knees. - The difference, I guess, is that Sting is absolutely being used to build up Darby Allin, whereas it's not like the fed brought back Goldberg and his attendant aura to pump up... anyone but Goldberg?

Kenny Omega (C) v PAC v Orange Cassidy for the AEW World Championship (****) - Off the top I have to say I'm very sad that the rest of the Galaxy's Greatest Friends were seen only very briefly, nice of them to bring OC's backpack. - Also have to point out that PAC's promo featured one of my favourite jokes, that Kenny must be short for Kenneth as a sort of legal/birth name belonging to a professional wrestler. (See also: Samoa Joseph) - And Mr Cassidy certainly did try in this match, ragdoll sells and all. Kenneth and PAC are absurd talents who bring aerial, power and technical maneuvers in equal measure and OC is not doing any of those on the same level, but he picked his spots, showed his genre savvy and hung in there to the point that he wasn't just the fall guy. - The extracurriculars continue in a match that was already a little overboard for silliness due to asymmetry... I think if you're the Invisible Hand it would've made sense to save up all your tricks for this match, but who am I to question the golden goose? - Sure, Kenny and Don ran the classic heel manager interference spot and taking out the ref in desperation spot but having to take out the ref because PAC wouldn't break the hold is fun, as is the stupid/inspired sense in running the 'smash opponent with the belt' spot four times so as none of your heavy gold prizes feel left out. (I love that AAA Mega Championship, they weren't on TV so we get to see it?) - "Fuck You, Don," indeed.

The Inner Circle v The Pinnacle in 'Stadium Stampede II' (***1/2) - This one had to grow on me for two reasons, first that it's usually pretty unforgivable to co-opt the main event spot from the championship match, and second to law of diminishing returns on dumb gimmick matches. - But grow it did. There's a full on meat locker? Commentary will refer to a cardboard cut-out of Shahid Khan as Tony Khan's father (that's canon now,) and Jericho will lovingly pat it? Konnan happened to be the DJ at whatever night club there is a Jaguar Stadium? Spears surrounds himself dramatically with chairs and his hoisted by his own petard? - Ultimately it comes down to letting Sammy shine. His involvement with the Inner Circle has sometimes come at the cost of being able to showcase that prior to AEW he was an ascendant talent in PWG, on his way to Ricochet level feats of acrobatic excess. Still feel like Sammy could've/should've been the one tossed off the cage a few weeks ago, but even better is being the guy getting the pin in the ring.

[appleciders]

I’d love to hear more of your thoughts on Martha’s siblings if you have any

Ooh okay! Turns out I had a lot, so I’ll stick em under the cut

I’d guess Martha is the second oldest of four. We know the first time she doesn’t have to share a room with her sisters is when her brother moves out, so we know he’s older, and then I would guess that they were like “okay second oldest gets their own room.” That’s not like for sure (one of my friends is the oldest of four and shares a room, while the second oldest gets his own room), but that just reads like the most likely scenario to me. And I don’t think there’s more than four of them, because I think in that case her brother would have had to share a room.

Something that struck me watching Martha’s flashbacks (that was chatted about on the most recent Out in the Wilds podcast!) was that we hear about her siblings in passing (or read about them, in the case of her brother), but we never see them. Not at any of the pow wow scenes, not playing in the backyard with Martha, not in the living room scene crammed next to Toni and watching TV. It feels almost like they were added after lmao. Could totally be a casting decision, but still a bit wack. We know really nothing about them.

So veering out of the domain of actual interpretation and into baseless conjecture, I have a couple headcanons that I’m ready to have proven completely wrong! Like I said in the tags of that other post, I like the name Brian/Bryan for her big brother (shoutout to my childhood classmate Bryan Mendoza for having deodorant so memorable that this jumped out in my head lol). For her sisters, I like some pairing of Mel, Jocelyn, or Louise/Louisa.

I think Martha’s brother played a sport in high school—maybe hockey (they could’ve watched hockey on TV together, cue “we can pass him around like the Stanley Cup!”) or lacrosse (shoutout Jenna Clause!). He was protective of Martha but like, from a distance. I can imagine him and baby Toni kind of having an ongoing joke about that—“I don’t need to look after her, Toni’ll get there first!” Speaking of Toni, I like to think the two of them have a one-on-one basketball game they always swear they’re gonna duke out but have never made good on. He also has a bit of Spencer from iCarly going on: “Hi Martha, hi Martha’s friend who’s never at her own home.” He definitely teases Martha and makes her roll her eyes a lot.

I think Martha’s sisters are a few years younger, and closer in age to each other than to Martha. Maybe three and four-ish years younger, respectively? Enough that Martha ends up mostly running a pretty different schedule than them, with a different school. I think Bernice is one of those moms that has a good relationship with each of her kids, each bonding over different things (though I could also see it if she had a bit of a strained relationship with Martha’s big brother, for some reason?). So whereas with Martha she takes her to dance and bonds with her over caring for all their pets, I like think with one of Martha’s little sisters she bonds over gardening and plants.

More thoughts on the sisters: I think one or both of them have louder personalities than Martha. I kind of read Martha as the sweetheart kid you don’t think you have to worry about (until you do). That’s not to say she’s a pushover—I think they definitely get into a normal amount of fights (“when my sisters and I fight, it’s to the death”) because the three of them shared a room and that’s a lot of kids stacked on top of each other, and Martha gives as good as she gets. But I do think the younger girls push buttons and maybe boundaries a bit more. One of them might also be really into sports, kind of inspired by that almost hero worship you see in younger kids with cool older siblings, and might look up to Toni in that respect too. One of them might also be artsy, and maybe did some of the art we see hanging on Martha’s walls (maybe the same one who’s into plants?).

Anyway, tl;dr: we really know nothing about them! But it was very fun to make shit up about, so thank you <33

[iceslushii]

Shattered Glass

*inspired by vanoss-luigi's 'footage' fanfic*

chapter: 5

word count: 4,168 (without the list panda makes its 3,864)

characters: fourzer0seven, BasicallyIDoWrk, Moo, BigJigglyPanda, SMii7Y, Kryoz, mentions of CaRtOoNz

tw: swearing, mentioning of blood (!!if i forget to put a warning for anything please let me know as i'm not very good at knowing what trigger warnings to include!!)

------------------------------

"He's gone?!" fourzer0 exclaimed after being informed. "Who is?" Basically emerged from downstairs, having been gone for roughly 6 hours. "CaRtOoNz. John said he disappeared not long ago." Scott turned around to see his friend coughing up glass into his hand, disposing of it down the stairs. "Wait.. Marcel.." Moo ran up the stairs and took his hand. "Can you come here a minute?" "Yeah, what is it?" "I saw you throw something downstairs.. what was it?" "You don't need to-" Basically choked up more glass, Moo gasping. "I'm not the only one who's doing that?" Basically looked up from the floor, surprised. "So it interfered with whatever you were doing too?" Moo explained after Basically asked that, intriguing him. "Ah.. I closed the front door and walked onto the pavement, but as soon as I did I was lying on the grass outside the door, surrounded by glass. Dunno what happened." Basically sighed as he leant against the wall adjacent to the radio room's door. "Me too.. it's almost as if whatever's making some vanish is affecting others." Moo, meanwhile, was almost sitting on the banister of the stairs. "You two doing okay?" Almost as if it was coincidental, the two attempted to respond but all that came out was blood and glass. "What is going on..?" "Hey, if anyone's interested I made a chart of who's left." Panda entered the radio room, leaving the door open intentionally. "You did? That's a good idea!" Moo exclaimed after clearing his throat, Panda turning around and smiling at him. "Yeah, thought so too. Anyway.. here it is." Anthony passed it to Brock, who then shared it with Marcel, then Scott. Group 1: 3/5 Jonathan: Missing since 29/8 Marcel: ✔, glass since 30/8 Scott: ✔ Tyler: Missing since 28/9 Anthony (me): ✔ Group 2: 1 or 2/3 David: Unknown John: ✔ Luke: Missing since 30/8 Group 3: 2/4 Evan: Missing since 19/8 Jaren: ✔ Brock: ✔, glass since 27/8 Brian: Missing since 29/8 Total: 5 or 6/12 The three of them were glad about the list, as it would come in handy for when people had disappeared. "This has been going on for roughly 11 days?" Moo hadn't realised how long it had been as he'd been healing from whatever had happened to him the day before Tyler disappeared. "Yeah.. I can understand why you didn't know that." Panda looked at Scott, who was still communicating with SMii7Y. "Holy shit! Scott!" Jaren abruptly exclaimed. "What?" "I found.. what is th-" SMii7Y cut off. fourzer0 waited a few seconds but nothing else was said. "No.. you can't be fucking serious." Panda ran over to the radio used to communicate with group 3 and switched it off and on a couple of times. "Not SMii7Y too!" he yelled. "Now I have to update my list!" "That's what he's concerned about?" Basically couldn't help but let out a small chuckle as he watched Panda run back downstairs. "Yeah, I know, but that's Anthony for you." fourzer0 spoke as he left the radio room for now. "It's late, I think I'm gonna go to bed." "That's fair enough. I might do the same." Basically said. "What're you gonna do, Brock?" "Might stay up and worry about everyone who's gone missing." Moo nervously laughed. "Eh, it's up to you." fourzer0 shrugged before entering his room, Basically going to his seconds later. Moo quietly entered the radio room and turned on group 2's radio. "Hello?" Brock spoke. "Who is it?" John almost instantly responded. "Me.." "Oh, hey Brock. What's up?" "..I'm worried." "Me too, to be honest. I'm the only one here currently." "I'm the only one awake here." "Who do you think will disappear next?" "I only came here to try and avoid that question. Can I try and get to you tomorrow?" "Yeah. Or you could do so right now." "Hm.. I guess it's worth a try.. I really hope to see you soon." "You too." Moo switched off the radio and began leaving the house.

"Right.. like he's gonna try and get them back." "Him and Marcel are the only ones who've been affected, the rest are fine." "We should do something about everyone else.. besides John." "Why not him? He's the only one left in his group." "We wouldn't want Brock to feel even worse just yet, give it a few days." "Hm, okay. You're the one who makes all the decisions, after all."

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the word count says otherwise, but this chapter is actually shorter than the others

im also not as happy with how well this one turned out but it’s more focused on who’s still fine rather than also including the missing people

wow i started writing this fanfic almost a day ago-

[aconboyindependent2021]

‘Now and Then’ - current state of play

My film is a re-imagining of the site of Brighton General Hospital next to my home. Until around 70 years ago, a workhouse operated on the site (for details, see: Gardner, J, (2012) A History of the Brighton Workhouses). Aspects of the austere workhouse are still evident on the site today. I began to think about the stories of the residents of the workhouse – what did they have to endure? With this in mind, I bought the above book by a local author about the history of workhouses in Brighton.

I have always been fascinated by the idea that traumatic events in a particular location can be recorded and replayed at a later time in history and that this might be a basis for ghosts and hauntings – for example, in the blockbuster, Poltergeist, and the BBC drama from the 1970’s The Stone Tapes (Sasdy, 1972). This is one of the key concepts behind the film.

After a lot of thought, I settled on the story of the workhouse being told by a single woman, Agatha, whose infant child was taken from her illegally and sold to a rich couple living in Brighton. This is a variation on the common Victorian  practice of unmarried women being compelled to give their children to a foundling home.

The film starts with Aggie telling her story in largely neutral terms and comparing the workhouse and the site’s positive use today as a hospital, but it climaxes with Aggie screaming with the loss of her child, and we see that she is a tormented spectre.The film ends with her anguish fading into a sign on the present site, promoting a nursery for infant children.

The film will be around 5-6 minutes long and will consist of edited original footage taken on the site in the present day. The film will be treated with video effects to alter the pacing, colour and atmosphere of the original footage. I have asked for a drama-trained friend to narrate the film as Aggie and will be using original and library sound effects and music motifs, or possibly drones to punctuate the soundtrack.

Now and Then – influences from other artists

1. Brian Percival - About a Girl

Female voice-over revealing a terrifying truth about motherhood at the end of the film. This film gives a cold dead feeling inside from the casual yet downcast demeanor as the leading character talks about her dysfunctional life and especially the ending, where the girl is revealed to have secretly miscarried a baby and we see her dump it into the canal (“I’ve become good at hiding things”). Both my film and About A Girl attempt to humanise the female main character outside of their tragedies.

2. Tobe Hooper - director of Poltergeist Paranormal activity centred around past events and the presence of aggrieved spirits. This was a film that made an impact on me from its non-stop tension, even before the presence of the supernatural becomes apparent. Tobe Hooper, ever since creating The Texas Chainsaw Massacre (1974) has achieved many awards, and after this film, it is easy to see why. It also has a similar plot to my initial idea for my film - where a great wrong done in the past creates a ‘haunting’ by aggrieved spirit(s)..

3. Peter Sasdy – Director of The Stone Tape (1972)

The original idea from the film was stones “recording” traumatic events from the past. While the current draft has drifted away from this concept, it still lives on with how Agatha remembers everything about the past as if she died yesterday, despite the superficial veneer of the current day hospital. However, Agatha is a real soul though in my film.

4. David Lynch - Eraserhead, The Elephant Man His black and white films – particularly The Elephant Man In the latter, view of Victorian England shot in black and white featuring cruelty and time-specific sounds, sights and atmospheres. The film always seems to have a sense of foreboding, even when the scene is uneventful, and with a deeply engaging soundtrack. Eraserhead will always always be an influence due to its deliberate disturbing monochrome style, investigation of altered perception and the anxieties of parenthood.

5. James Gardener- Author of: A Complete History Of Brighton Workhouses A detailed and easy-to-understand book centred around the original workhouse in my area. It includes the Brighton General Hospital Site. It helped give a real-life grounding to my supernatural tale.

6. Richard Boden - director of the Blackadder series 4 finale, Goodbyeee The series as a whole has very little to do with my film, but this is a powerful episode whose fade-out ending and closing-sound inspired the cross-dissolve effects and soundscape in my film - coincidentally both are centered with the cruelty of the past and atmospheric sound. Present and past merge at this point. One of the most popular scenes in TV drama/comedy and understandably so too.

7. Piotr Obal – various films and still images Obal is an independent artist who works with art, music and still photography. Occasionally, he teaches youths how to work at the computer like me (!) when he was helping out with an arts award I was studying for. Below is one of his images that has been an influence on me and the film. I love his Photoshop collages and the wonderful images he posts from his native Poland.

                                                        Work by Piotr Obal

8. Nalini Malani- for her immersive installations, ‘disgraced’ women under partiarchy, history and mythology, miscarriages of justice. I found out about Malini when I was writing my essay on her work in the  Diversity module: what started off as just finding out about an artist for the sake of my writing became a long-lasting admiration and inspiration from an artist who not only knows where she is coming from (from her upbringing hugely affected by India and Pakistan’s partition) but willingly sticks her neck out for those oppressed by society and history, and confidently shows her creations to the world. A particularly relevant aspect of her work is her use of the supernatural and mythology stories and myths to highlight aspects of women’s oppression throughout history.

9. Chris Butler- director of ParaNorman A key influence, supposedly aimed at children, I used the same of the spectre in this moving animation, and I was influenced by its themes about the cruelties of humanity and how we “moved on”. The spectre is a ghost of a falsely accused of being a ‘witch’ who wreaks her revenge on those who persecuted her.

It was also a strong influence that is more powerful at its climax and twist. In-depth look at how prejudice destroys lives that are never regained - even  death provides no relief. Butler is a part of Studio Laika, creating animated films that go beyond the norm.

10. Jacqueline Wilson - the writer of the Hetty Feather trilogy and other such Victorian novels such as Clover Moon.

A part of Jacqueline’s writings is her commentary about how unjust the past could be compared to today: even though her protagonists speak in ways that were customary to Victorians, she keeps them relatable the same way she keeps her modern-day protagonists relatable. The writing style of her books inspired certain characteristics of Agatha’s narration, because it was easy to understand yet engaging.

11. David Lean  - Director of Great Expectations (1946) This film, based on the Dickens book,  also brought to mind the cruel period of the Victorian era, and the acting and emotions continued that spirit and my inspiration around my project. I love that it is black and white as well as dialog-centred - I particularly like the formal style of speech - even to express negative emotions- for example:

“Let me point out the topic that in London it is not the custom to put the knife in the mouth for fear of accidents. It's scarcely worth mentioning, Only it's as well to do as others do”.

Miss Havisham, an almost ghostly older woman, in a similar way to Agatha cannot move beyond the terrible wrong done to her - she was left at the alter and devoted her life to training her adopted daughter, Estella, to get revenge on men.I use s similar obsessive, sing-minded hatred to motivate Agatha.

12. Sunset Boulevard (1950)

This film involve a man becoming the object of affection of a former silent movie star, Norma Desmond who overtake his life little by little until she kills him. Norma suffered with the times when silent movies went out of fashion and she is unable to move on, alone in her great house: people told Norma that she had no value and it had an impact on her psyche. She loses all sanity when arrested for killing Joe Gillis as she believes she is back in show business. The film also explores facades; Norma may live a glamorous if not lonely life, but her mental state torments her, like Aggie has with hers as she wanders around the hospital site driven ‘mad’ with grief and anger.  

13. R D Laing: ‘anti-psychiatrist’

'Here was someone explaining madness, showing how the fragmentation of the person was an intelligible response to an intolerable pressure”

Quote from: https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2013/aug/25/rd-laing-aaron-esterson-mental-illness

 In discussing the concept of my film with a member of my family, I was directed to the psychiatrist/anti-psychiatrist, RD Laing. In the 1960’s and early 1970’s Laing wrote about how a person’s so-called ‘mad’ behaviour was in fact intelligible when their entire situation and experience was taken into account. He and other writers (like David Cooper) talked about the concept of the ‘double-bind’ where a person’s opportunity to make a decision to resolve the way they were being treated was blocked – perhaps by a member of their family saying that it was not in their personality to be assertive or angry.

This reminded me very much of Agatha; she tries to express her outrage at the great wrong done to her, but she is judged as unworthy and undeserving, so the wrong is seen as justified and her punishment for being the ‘low-life’ who would have a child and have to live in a workhouse. It is circular – she is treated badly because she deserves to be treated badly and so this means that her hatred and insanity brings the great wrong up herself.

Laing is largely forgotten today, but his ideas resonate with certain ideas in feminism and anti-racism. ‘Gaslighting’ is everywhere, both back then and now.

 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9NnBonXPLJM

[lady-divine-writes]

ACITW AU Inspired fic - “The Vacation Ultimatum” (Rated PG13)

Summary:

Sebastian wants to go somewhere different for summer vacation this year, but Kurt has his heart set on the beach house. He promises Sebastian he'll at least entertain other options. ... In his defense, he finds something very entertaining. (2316 words)

Notes: This is an ACITW inspired fic I started writing last summer before my computer died on me.

Read on AO3.

“So, babe, I was thinking …” Sebastian leaps over the back of the sofa to sit beside Kurt scanning the pages of the latest Vogue magazine.

“That’s dangerous. Real dangerous,” Kurt comments, not lifting his eyes from an ad for Gucci footwear. Kurt seems particularly interested in a pair of blue-and-black brocade loafers, checking the fine print for price and sizing information. Sebastian, knowing by now what Kurt’s long, thoughtful look (narrowed eyelids, scrunched nose, sucked in lips) means, takes note. “Didn’t we talk about that?”

“Ha … ha … ha. Anyway, what if this year, instead of going to the beach house for the summer …?”

Sebastian doesn’t get farther than that before Kurt drops his magazine and glares at him with the ice-cold burn of a lover scorned.

“Wh-what!? Not go to the …! Why!?”

“Babe…” Sebastian knew there was a chance Kurt would react this way from the second he opened his mouth. Kurt is always at his most deadly when he won’t let Sebastian finish a sentence. But Sebastian had hoped he might be persuaded to listen to reason, especially since he’d mentioned wanting to go on a pilgrimage to the House of Alexander this year. If anything could break them out of their summer vacay rut, it should have been McQueen. A jaunt across the pond would have been a welcome change from their usual trip to North Carolina. But apparently Kurt is too sentimental to break from their routine, even for a journey to the temple of his idol.

Sebastian had been hoping against hope … and he lost.

“Because we go to the beach house every summer!”

Kurt’s eyes shift left and right, waiting for a more compelling argument. “Yeah, and …?”

“And aren’t you getting a little tired of it? Don’t you think it’s getting old?”

Kurt’s jaw drops in silent gasp. “Who … who are you right now? How … how can you say that!?”

“Because over a decade of summers at the same beach house can get kind of stale, Kurt!”

Kurt shakes his head slowly, disbelief deepening fine lines around his mouth and the corners of his eyes. “You’ve known me for over a decade! Am I getting stale?”

“Do you really want an answer to that?” Sebastian jokes before self-preservation and common sense have the chance to shove his size nines in his mouth and stop him. Kurt’s mouth snaps shut with frightening speed, his teeth making a sound when they meet like the cracking of bone.

“If that’s how you feel,” he says, words short, over-enunciated, clipped at the ends as if with razor-sharp shears, “then I can go to the beach house alone this summer, and you can go somewhere fresher!”

Sebastian sighs. He should have known he wasn’t going to win this one. He was defeated before he began. “Kurt …”

“And while you’re there, maybe you can find yourself someone less hard and crusty since I’m becoming so stale!”

“Jesus Christ, Kurt!” Sebastian’s hands find his hair and pull in frustration. “Stop twisting things around! That’s not what I meant! Arguing about the same thing over and over is getting stale!”

“Then stop arguing,” Kurt poses with a wicked grin. “There. Problem solved.”

“I happen to have good reasons for not wanting to go to the beach house this summer!”

“And those are …?”

“For one thing, it’s nowhere near private.”

Kurt chuckles humorlessly. “It’s on a private beach! That your family owns!”

“Olivia and Brian drop in with the kids all the time, unannounced.”

“So? I love Olivia and Brian! And the kids!”

“So do I! But I also love being able to walk around naked and fuck in the kitchen!”

“No one ever stops you walking around naked here at home! And we’ve fucked in the kitchen so many times, we’ve worn ass marks onto the floor, the island, and the table! You can’t throw a robe over yourself and fuck in a bed like a normal person for one month?”

“Kurt! Don’t you think it’s nice to do something new every once in a while?”

Kurt carefully picks up his dropped magazine so that he has something to toss sassily aside and crosses his arms over his chest. “Have you met me?”

“Uh, yeah,” Sebastian says, mirroring the gesture … minus having anything to throw. Not that he didn’t look around him for something suitable, but the only things within reach are coffee mugs and Yankee Candles, and he doesn’t want to accidentally give Kurt a concussion. “You’re stubborn and annoying!”

“Exactly!”

Sebastian snorts at the word Kurt wasn’t quick enough to catch before it flew out of his mouth, turned around, and slapped him in the face.

Kurt closes his eyes on his own faux pas and shakes it from his head. “I mean, about being stubborn. How many times do I stray from the familiar? I wear the same designers all the time, I order the same dish at every restaurant, I’ve driven the same Navigator since high school …”

“Yeah …” Sebastian clears his throat before he accidentally guffaws “… by the way, that’s something we really need to talk about ...”

Kurt’s offended face becomes comically dramatic. “My life is stressful, Sebastian!”

Sebastian pauses his argument to look Kurt over from head to toe - his significant other reclining on the sofa in his pajamas and robe with his feet propped up … at three on a Thursday afternoon.

“Yeah …” He leans over, catches the end of Kurt’s untied belt, and flips it across his waist. “The rigors of your life must be crippling!”

“It’s my afternoon off, you deranged kumquat!” Kurt snaps, tossing the belt back and smacking Sebastian on the chin. “The point is I value our summer together. Most of all, I value the fact that I don’t have to stress out about it because I don’t have to put any energy into thinking about doing something different! It’s a no-brainer!”

“So you’re saying it suits you.”

Kurt points at Sebastian, very reminiscent of a circa 2000 Cooper Anderson. “Watch your step, Smythe, or you’re sleeping alone tonight.”

“Yeah, okay,” Sebastian relents, putting his hands up in surrender. “I’m sorry. That one went a bit too far.”

Kurt breathes in deep, exhales long. “Look, when we first got together and divvied up responsibilities, you put me in charge of planning summer vacation.”

“Because I thought you’d send us to all sorts of exotic locales with clothing optional activities.”

“We do those over spring break! And on our birthdays! And over New Year’s! We’ve flashed more people than Tara Reid! I like going to the beach house in the summer! It’s tradition!”

“But we can go anywhere in the world!”

“I don’t wanna go anywhere in the world!” Kurt parrots in a whiny voice. “I wanna go to the beach house!”

Sebastian slaps his hands on his thighs and pushes up to his feet. “Fine. Whatevs. Just do me a favor. For me. Because you supposedly love me.”

Kurt rolls his eyes so far back in his head he glimpses his soul. “I guess …”

“Get on your phone and check out some other spots that you might want to go to. Any spot, regardless of distance or cost. Then we’ll compare, list pros and cons, and together we’ll make an educated decision. That way we’ll know one hundred percent for certain that there isn’t somewhere else that tickles your fancy.”

“I already know …”

“Just this once,” Sebastian says, cutting into Kurt’s grousing, “and again, because you love me.”

Kurt’s face pinches, his lips pulled tight to avoid creasing. He drops his head back on his shoulders in exasperation and reaches in his robe pocket for his phone. “All right, all right. But shoo. I don’t need any distractions.”

Sebastian leans in to give Kurt a kiss, grinning when he swats him away like an irritating insect. “Your wish is my command, oh benevolent dictator.”

“That’s Expedia God to you.”

***

Sebastian makes himself scarce for more than an hour running odd errands - one of which includes buying Kurt his favorite cheesecake from the bakery down the block. He’s both encouraged and relieved when he returns home to find Kurt still in the living room when he should be at yoga, bent over his phone, staring intently at something on his screen.

He missed yoga for this, Sebastian thinks. He must be taking it seriously.

Even more than that, Kurt is smiling, lower lip pinched between his teeth, his eyes positively glowing.

‘Yes!’ Sebastian cheers silently, slipping into the kitchen to put away the cheesecake while allowing himself a moment to daydream about spending this upcoming summer vacation on the French Riviera, which they admittedly did last Christmas. Or in Jamaica, where they’d gone two falls ago. Or, like he’d thought, London, which is where they’d spent Fashion Week. Sebastian stops with his hand on the refrigerator door, chewing his own lower lip in thought. Looking back on their lives together as a couple, they have done their share of traveling around the world, even if they do spend every summer in North Carolina. So … spending another one there isn’t exactly a big deal. They’d recently booked a flight to Rio to coincide with the start of the school year, winging over after the egress of promiscuous co-eds vying for one final fling before hitting the books.

Jesus Christmas!

Is he being a jerk about nothing!?

Sebastian pulls out his cell phone and checks his calendar. Nearly every box of every month is filled with meetings, assignments, appointments. But aside from that, it’s cluttered with trips they’ve planned - the Cape for their anniversary; the Poconos for Kurt’s dad and stepmom’s anniversary; Munich for Oktoberfest, which happens to be a tradition that Sebastian started - one that Kurt hasn’t always been so fond of. He can appreciate the food. He can appreciate the beer. He can appreciate the authentic costumes and the lively music and dancing.

But the second people start hugging and slapping each other, he gets a little skittish.

Last year, Sebastian flew Kurt to Milan last minute for Arbor Day, just to give him a reason to make the stupid day memorable. Thus is one of the perks of being rich. He’d planned on making that a tradition.

So that’s two of Sebastian’s traditions to one of Kurt’s.

Sebastian sticks his head in the fridge, smacking his forehead against the butter dish, and groans.

If Kurt wants to spend this summer - and every summer until the day they die - in North Carolina, is it really such a big deal?

But seeing Kurt stare at his phone with a huge smile on his face intrigues Sebastian. Even after everything, their whole argument, he did what Sebastian asked. He gave it a chance. What if he actually found somewhere else he wants to go? Skydiving? Spelunking? Scuba diving? Another hot air balloon ride?

Sebastian swallows hard remembering …

… they can do all those things in North Carolina.

He removes his head from the dairy section and closes the door. Then he strolls back into the living room, nonchalant smile on his face.

“You’re looking pretty focused there, babe. Did you find something you like?”

“Yup.”

Sebastian’s spine tingles with the possibilities. “Willing to share?”

“Well, in order for you to appreciate where I ended up on my journey, I’ll need to walk you through my process.”

“Do tell …”

“I didn’t have any particular locale in mind, but I knew I wanted to go to the beach, so I started looking up beaches.”

Sebastian nods. “Not venturing too far from the comfortable, I see, but still promising.”

“Tropical beaches, exclusive beaches, private beaches, beach resorts, islands …”

“A-ha …”

“I saw a link for this beach in San Diego called Dog Beach.”

“Very nice. Quaint. I’ve been there once or twice. Lots of nice little communities with bungalows …”

“I thought so, too. But I was clicking through the website and I saw the most amazing thing. Something I wouldn’t mind seeing in person.”

“Really?” Sebastian says hopefully.

“A-ha. It had pictures of a surf dog competition …”

Sebastian’s smile dips at the corners. His voice becomes a little tight. “Okay …”

“I clicked on it and …”

“Let me guess …” Sebastian drops his head into his hands, blunt nails digging into the cold spot on his forehead “… you’ve been watching videos of surfing dogs.”

“Yup.”

“For how long?”

“Oh, I don’t know. When was the last time you were in here?”

Sebastian’s arms drop to his side revealing his disgruntled expression. “You’ve been watching videos of dogs surfing for two hours!?”

“I guess. Time’s just … flown by …”

Sebastian watches in agony as Kurt switches to another tab on his phone, bringing up a YouTube video of a bulldog riding a skateboard. Kurt chuckles and shakes his head.

“How’d you learn how to do that?” he baby talks the screen. “You’re the goodest boy, aren’t you? 12 out of 10.” He scrolls down to the comment section to type that in.

Sebastian slaps his forehead. He turns on his heel and heads for the bedroom before he has the chance to go insane. To be honest, he should have known better. He walked into this one, what with his cockimamey ideas about going somewhere else over the summer. “Beach house it is.”

“If that’s what you think is best, dear,” Kurt mutters to Sebastian’s retreating back, deeply enthralled in another dog video. He waits till he hears Sebastian open the door to the bathroom, then closes out the video and composes a text:

To: Olivia

False alarm! We’re on for the beach house!

He giggles conspiratorially when a message immediately pops up.

From: Olivia

Thank God! See you there!

[rushingheadlong]

Lockdown Blues - A Queen Gen Fic

Summary: Freddie has made it his mission to keep everyone’s spirits up while they’re stuck at home. He doesn’t think the others have noticed - but they have, and they're ready to remind him that they have his back too.

Wordcount: ~2,000

Tags/Warnings: Vague modern & early Queen AU, Gen, H/C. There are references to the boys being stuck at home for an indefinite amount of time. The cause for this is never specifically discussed, but given the current world situation please read with care.

Notes: Written for a prompt from @tenderbri​ though I made a few small tweaks to it. I hope you still enjoy this!

Living with his three friends and band mates was the best idea Freddie had ever had. They all had their moods, of course, and fights were inevitable, but the anger never lasted long and the flat was always more full of laughter than of shouting.

At least, it had been that way. Lately, though, with all of them stuck at home together, things are unusually quiet as the stress and worry slowly sinks over the household.

It doesn’t take long for Brian to slip into one of his low moods. He hardly leaves his bedroom for days at a time - though Freddie suspects that he goes up to the roof in the middle of the night to try and look at the stars. He still has his thesis to work on but he’s not making much progress on it. No matter how many times they reassure Brian that he doesn’t have to be completely productive right now, Freddie knows that their soft-hearted guitarist is weighed down with guilt for not using this time to do more.

John is the opposite. John finished up a semester’s worth of coursework almost overnight, and has been pacing the apartment desperate for something to do ever since then. He mostly spends his days now going over their joint finances with a fine-toothed comb to figure out how to stretch their meager savings with none of them working at the moment. If any of them can make things work it’ll be John, but the tight set line of his mouth as he tallies up the figures isn’t an encouraging sight.

With the stall temporarily closed and their gigs cancelled for the foreseeable future, Roger has been in a bear of a mood. The only thing stopping him from chain-smoking to deal with the stress is the threat of running out of cigarettes altogether, and without a kit in the house he’s taken to drumming on any available flat surface at all hours of the day. Freddie has half a mind to break his sticks just to get some peace and quiet, unless John does it first.

As for Freddie… Well, he’s actually almost fine. He’s worried, of course he is, but the four of them are safe and as near as they can tell their families are safe as well. He doesn’t have schoolwork to stress about, he’s always been hopeless with the finances, and the forced downtime has inspired a number of new songs that they can work on when they can get back in the studio.

So Freddie is fine - but his friends are not, and Freddie takes it upon himself to cheer them up however he can.

He gives Roger his new songs so he can work out drum parts for them. He makes tea for John while he shuffles around their budget for the third time that week, and he gently coaxes Brian out of the house to go grocery shopping in hopes that the fresh air will brighten his spirits. He gathers everyone together for game nights, and subtly breaks up fights before they can really begin, and does everything in his power to keep their moods up… but it’s not enough.

Brian still stays quiet and burdened by his unnecessary guilt. John still obsessively pours over their finances. Roger still paces through the apartment like a caged tiger on a short fuse. And Freddie knows that he can’t fix this completely, that there’s only so much he can do when the world is going to pieces around them, but he still feels like there has to be something more he can do to help.

Freddie lies on his bed, staring up at the ceiling, wracking his mind for something, anything, he can try to make things a bit better for his friends. He started making a list an hour or so ago but now it lies discarded at his side, because all of his ideas are utterly useless.

He can’t cook them a nice dinner because, well, he can’t cook. Period. He’s already forced so many game nights on them that he thinks they might riot if he even thinks the word “Scrabble”. There’s no extra money to pick up a treat at the grocery store, and there’s no use in trying to surprise them with a new movie when John can pirate anything they could ever want. He’s written so many songs already and each has only been a passing distraction for Roger, and Brian’s mood has been so bleak that there’s no room for music in his world at the moment at all.

“This is pointless,” Freddie grumbles as he flings an arm dramatically across his eyes. “This is all fucking pointless.”

And maybe Freddie isn’t as fine as he thought he was, because as soon as he has that thought something inside him breaks, just a little. Because all he’s done, since this entire mess started, was try to make his friends happy. And if he can’t do that anymore… then what’s the point?

Freddie might have a small breakdown but it’s quiet and contained. He doesn’t cry. He doesn’t scream. He doesn’t throw his notebook across the room. He just sighs, and rolls over to face the wall, and gives up.

Freddie sleeps, for a little while. And he smokes out his window until his lungs burn, and when John knocks on the door around dinner time Freddie, in a fit of pique, pretends not to hear him. If Brian can hide in his room for days on end, then so can I, Freddie thinks bitterly, though the pettiness of the thought fills him with shame.

He doesn’t want to get up the next morning. His one distraction is gone, and without it he doesn’t think he can muster up the energy to keep pretending that he’s alright. He doesn’t think he can go out there and smile at his friends and make John tea and give Roger new songs and coax Brian into being social for a little while. And if Freddie can’t cheer up his friends he thinks that maybe he should just stay in here, so at least his foul mood doesn’t make things worse for them.

And just when Freddie thinks he’s made up his mind, and he’s not going to leave this room until he absolutely has to… he smells something burning.

Freddie is out of bed in a flash, because what if Brian can’t smell the smoke in his room and Roger is outside having a cigarette and John slipped and fell and can’t get help and-

The scene in kitchen is certainly one of chaos, but not quite of the sort that Freddie had been expecting to see.

There is something burning but it’s just in the microwave, and Freddie sees Roger fish out a charred bag of popcorn as Brian throws open the kitchen window. John is stirring something in a pot on the stove and shouting at Roger, who’s shouting back at him as he throws the bag into the sink, and Brian grabs a tea towel and starts waving it try to clear the smoke.

And they’re smiling.

Freddie can’t remember the last time he’s seen all three of them smiling like this.

Roger is the first to notice Freddie standing in the doorway to the kitchen and he says, “Oh, shit! Freddie- fuck, you weren’t supposed to see this yet, it’s not ready!”

“See what? You three nearly burning the place down?” Freddie says. It’s supposed to be a joke, but it comes out a bit too sharp. A day ago that would have gotten Brian shrinking in on himself, and Roger gearing up for a fight, and John going tense and silent - but today they all just laugh.

“That wasn’t the plan, no,” Brian says, and there’s amusement in his voice. Freddie hadn’t quite realized how much he missed hearing that, until now. “Roger found some old bags of popcorn buried in the back of the cupboard, and John looked up a few recipes for seasonings, and we thought-”

“Movie night!” Roger finishes for him. “Your pick, Fred!”

Freddie blinks at them and considers that. A movie night does sound like a good plan, and it’s nice to see the three of them in such high spirits. “Alright,” he says at last. “But you all should pick the movies-”

“No,” John interrupts. “This night is for you.”

“What?”

“We know what you’ve been doing, you know,” Roger says. “Distracting us, trying to cheer us up… and don’t get me wrong, we appreciate it, but it’s your turn now.”

“You’ve been stressed too. You may be a bit better at hiding it, but we’ve finally noticed. So you pick the movies tonight, whatever you want to watch,” Brian adds. He tosses the tea towel down on the counter and wrinkles his nose. “God, Rog, the whole flat is going to stink for the rest of the day!”

“Then light a candle or something, Brian, I don’t know what to tell you!”

“With the way things are going, if I do that then we’ll actually burn the place down!”

And Freddie laughs. Roger, Brian, and John are visibly startled and Freddie is actually a little startled too, because it’s genuine. He’s done plenty of laughing since this whole mess started but it’s almost always been forced, a show of normalcy to try to make his friends feel better - but it’s not forced anymore.

“Thank you,” he says and he means it, with every fiber of his being. “Thank you, my darlings. I needed this.”

Roger hip-checks him as he walks by to put another bag of popcorn into the microwave. “We know,” Roger says, and behind him Brian quickly - and a little frantically - adjusts the settings before Roger pushes the start button. “So, what movies are we watching?”

Freddie thinks about that for a moment. “How much alcohol do we still have?”

“Enough,” John tells him. “Why…?”

“And can I really pick any movie, or do you lot have veto power?”

The three of them exchange a bit of a worried look, but Brian admits, “We, ah- No. No, we weren’t going to give ourselves veto power.”

“But I’m regretting that decision now,” Roger mutters.

“Good.” Freddie beams at them. “We’re watching Cats.”

“No,” Roger says immediately. “God, please, no…”

“The new movie, or the stage play…?” Brian asks, though he doesn’t sound too thrilled by either possibility.

Freddie grins wickedly as he says, “Both. One, and then the other. I’ll let you choose which one we watch first.”

The three of them look pained and John is the first to sigh and say. “Well. We did say he could pick anything.”

John leaves the popcorn making up to Brian so he can go find copies of the movies to pirate. Roger also decides to leave the popcorn to Brian and instead takes control of the alcohol, while Freddie lights a few candles in the living room to help mask the faint burning smell still drifting through the flat.

By the time the food and drink are squared away, John has the first movie queued up and the four of them settle onto the couch in a tangle of limbs. Someone’s drink is guaranteed to get spilled, and Roger is already flicking popcorn at the TV when he thinks no one is looking, and it’s messy and chaotic and loud in a way that none of them have been in weeks.

Maybe tomorrow Brian will withdraw again, and John’s brow will furrow with stress, and Roger will throw another pair of drumsticks out the window in frustration - but Freddie isn’t worrying about any of that right now. He’s not worrying about how to put on a brave face and cheer up his friends, and he’s not worrying about the future or the world outside their door.

All Freddie is thinking, as the opening credits draw to a close and Brian makes a horrified noise as the movie starts in earnest, is that living with his three friends was absolutely the best decision that Freddie ever made.

[asphalt-cocktail]

Kinkmas Prompt #12: Pet Play

A/N: Hi Yall! I’m going to be honest I thought about making this longer but I ended up keeping it short, so if you would like a part 2 slide into my DMs/asks. Stay tuned for another fic tonight! I’ve never written pet play before so I wasnt entirely sure what to write, sorry if it isn’t what you expected! If you would like to request a prompt and character yourself please reference my Kinkmas masterpost.

Pairing: The Beatles x Reader

Word Count: 1.6k

Warnings: Smut, Polyamory, mentions of prostitution, oral(f receiving), pet play, collar, idk really.

Kinkmas 2019 Masterlist

General Masterlist

Asks

If you are considered a minor do NOT interact with this post. This is fictitious content and I own nothing.

Your job was… well it was interesting to say the least. It started out as a simple customer service job working for Brian Epstein, you’d answer phones, schedule appointments, take notes, you know the usual things a secretary would do. It was a job that didn’t help you pay the bills.

You spent many a break on your phone with your mom, “I don’t know how I’m going to make rent.” You said in a hushed tone, talking in the back office in hopes that no one would hear you.

Your mom always took moments like these to remind you that you should have never moved to the city, “I know, I know.” Your tone frustrated and disgruntled, “I’m picking up extra shifts at that restaurant I told you about.” No matter how hard you worked, it seemed as though she was always disappointed with your decision to be more independent.

It wasn’t until your boss, Mr. Epstein over heard you that he propositioned you.

Your face flushed “You-you want me to what?” You asked in disbelief. It wasn’t an unappealing offer to say the least, but it caught you off guard.

Brian shifted sheepishly, “Well, with going over to the states, I don’t want the boys to run wild with all the women that’ll be around.” You understood what he was getting at, the boys did have insatiable sexual appetites that had only been fueled by their recent claim to fame. They couldn’t run around ruining their own reputation, not after all of the work they put in, “I’ll pay you more of course, for your troubles.” He cleared his throat “I’ll even throw in apartment that’s closer to the studio for your troubles.” He crossed his arms over his chest and awaited your response.

You chewed on your lip and pondered, an apartment closer to work would be nice, and the more pay was enticing, but you couldn’t wrap your head around prostituting yourself. It was literally what your mom had warned you would happen.

“You’re going to end up selling sex for money!” She would scold and you’d laugh.

That was ridiculous wasn’t it?

Well, apparently it wasn’t all that ridiculous because here you were, seriously considering it as an option to help you pay the bills. You swallowed thickly and glanced at the soundproof window that looked into the studio, you could see the boys goofing off, George’s sharp cheekbones, Paul’s pouty lips, Ringo’s cheeky smirk, and John’s devilish glint that hid behind his Buddy Holly inspired glasses were all enticing. You looked back at your boss and pursed your lips for a moment “I’ll do it.” You responded with a curt nod.

Today was actually your first day in your new position and your first official day in America. Per the boys, you were told to wait patiently in the green room for them to finish their performance and set out bottles of water and towels for when they returned. It didn’t matter how thick the concrete walls were or how many divided you from the crowd you could still hear their roars as clear as day. The reception they received was insane.

But what was even more insane was this stupid collar that you had on. It was simple and black with a silver buckle on it and the short pencil skirt you were always required to wear, for easy access. You checked the clock, their show would be over in ten minutes, so you assumed your position next to the door and knelt, smoothing your skirt over your thighs and waited.

Your knees hurt and dug into the tacky shag carpet while you played with the hem of your skirt, rubbing it between your fingers nervously. You could hear chatter on the other side of the door and the handle jiggled. You sat up straight and poised, adjusting your chest so it stuck out more than usual for good measure. You were nervous, your heart was racing, and your breathing sped up as you saw the first boot step through the door. Your eyes remained averted and your face flushed, you swallowed thickly, and the collar felt as though it was getting tighter around your neck.

“Your show sounded great!” You said greeting them.

“Wow,” Ringo quipped, “I wasn’t expecting you to actually do what we asked.”

You looked up to see them, their mop tops sweaty and plastered to their faces, and cheeks reddened from heat “Well,” You started, “It’s my job, why wouldn’t I do it?” You asked honestly.

John smirked, “You’re an obedient little kitten, aren’t you?” He asked. You clenched your thighs, you’d never been called kitten before. It ignited a fire in your belly, “Come on over here.” He beckoned.

You nodded and stood up from your spot on the floor, brushing your skirt and legs off and walked over. John spread his legs and patted his lap for you to sit and you promptly followed his silent command. As soon as took your seated position his hand gripped the dip of your hip, calloused fingers rubbing softly on the fabric.

“Are you nervous?” Paul asked and gave you a knowing smirk.

Your eyes darted around the room before you shook your head “No,” You lied through your teeth.

“Why don’t you be a good little Kitty and spread those legs for us then?” John asked, using his large hands to rub the inside of your thighs and beckon them open.

You leaned back into his shoulder, inhaling his musky scent and spread your legs wide. Your skirt began to inch up your lap before it exposed the damp spot that had soaked through your cotton panties. You turned your face with embarrassment and buried it into John’s neck. Your chest heaved with anticipation as you felt his calloused hands inching closer and closer to your heat.

Your legs began to shake, feeling his hand touching everywhere but where you so desperately needed it, “Come on, John, don’t go on teasing the poor thing.” George cooed.

With that he finally pulled your panties to the side, gathering the slick on his fingers before he pushed into your tight cunt. You choked out a high-pitched moan and spread your legs further. His fingers expertly circled your clit while he trailed kisses down your neck, licking and sucking to mark your skin. But, as soon as his fingers entered you, they exited and moved up to your chest, pulling your shirt up and exposing your breasts. John pulled your bra down causing them to spill out and your nipples to begin to harden in response to the cool air.

His calloused hands began to pinch and twist the pebbled buds, your mouth hung open and you rested your head on his shoulder while he whispered filthy words into your ear. You opened your eyes for a brief moment and looked down to see Ringo settling between your legs. He looked up at you nervously, for such a handsome man he was the most self-conscious out of all four of the boys, “Mind if I…” he trailed off as his hand settled on either side of your panties. You nodded your head, urging him to take them off.

Once they were slipped off and your skirt now fully bunched up, exposing your entire bottom half Ringo settled between your legs, spreading your folds and getting a view of the mess you were making on John’s trousers. He experimentally inserted a finger into you and instinctively curled it upwards, brushing against your soft walls. The sensation of his cold rings biting against your skin and the pleasure he was bringing you along with John gripping your breasts soon became over whelming.

Paul stood behind Ringo, observing your dripping cunt and watching Ringo’s thick fingers disappearing within you, pumping in and out rhythmically, “Give her a taste,” He urged, “She’s been such a good girl.”

Your walls fluttered around Ringo’s fingers at the positive affirmation which caused Ringo to smirk. He spread you apart and hesitantly dipped his head between your legs and licked at your wet folds. You shuttered and your hips relaxed while your head fell back onto John’s shoulder while he pinched and pulled your nipples.

Ringo’s tongue delved inside you, lapping at your wet core like a starved man, his fingers continued to pump in and out of you, curling and rubbing against your soft walls. You bucked your hips and ground them against his face and moved to lace your fingers through his hair, but your wrist was quickly snatched by a set of long and thin fingers.

You opened one of your eyes and saw George holding your wrist and stroking his length in his other hand. Instinctively you reached out and brushed your thumb over the tip, spreading the precum that had leaked out over and pumped your hand down his length. He shuttered and brushed your hair out of your face, grabbing a fist full and tilting your head back roughly.

You gasped as your head jerked back, exposing your neck and allowing now both John and George to kiss your neck, the contrasting feelings of their kisses and Ringo tongue vigorously lapping at you caused your chest to heave and breathy moans to seep from your lips as you continued to roll your hips and jerk George off. You reached your hand up and ran your nails down the side of John’s neck while you desperately sought something to keep your self-anchored to while your walls quivered around Ringo’s tongue. “Do you think our good little kitten deserves to come?” John asked, his voice was heavy with lust.

Paul gave you a cheeky smirk, “Why don’t you be a good girl and come all over Ringo’s face for us.”  You glanced over to see him seated casually, his long legs sprawled out, pants unzipped, and pumping his length in his hand. Your back arched against John’s broad shoulders and you let out a desperate cry as you came, your walls pulsating and clenching Ringo’s fingers. Neither of the boys had yet to get off, but you still had a feeling that your time with them was far from over.

[fragilefears]

Cheers to 5 years of Critical Role!

I want to say something about what this game, this show, these people mean to me - but I don’t really know what, or how, to say it. So I’m tempted not to. But I don’t want to bail on this because I feel some very strong things and I need to get better at expressing that.

It hasn’t even been a year since I began listening to the first episode of Vox Machina, downloading it on my phone while I waited for my very delayed flight to take me to see my family for Easter.

A friend of mine at work was (is)a huge fan and had been playing D&D for about a year before this - I was interested but also very busy and unable to take on any new commitments. But in the new year I joined a weekly D&D game with them and some other friends, a few who watched CR. It was a lot to get used to, but so much fun. I intended to try to watch CR, but sometimes I’m weird about trying to consume new content if it’s unfamiliar... It was a few months later - sitting in the plane, realising that my flight was delayed hours later than scheduled, further prolonging the long 10 months I’d been away from my family, and quietly sobbing with homesickness for my sister - that I thought what the heck, I’ll give it a go. And it was so much fun! It was slow going at first... but within weeks it all but consumed me. (Oh also i eventually got to spent Easter with my family and it was very good)

When I got home, it wasn’t long before every waking hour that I wasn’t required to speak to someone, I was listening to Critical Role podcasts on my headphones (I only really watched the live shows, and watched more of C2 as I caught up - these days I watch the new episodes each week.) It was crazy, and fun, and dramatic, and interesting, and my ADHD hyperfocus had never found something so engaging and utterly expansive to latch onto before. Everything else is so limited - movies run for a few hours and then you’re rewatching the same thing again... books can be re-read (but also you can’t read when you’re grocery shopping or crafting or paying bills....) tv shows are ok but not many are long enough to keep you going before you have to make another decision of What To Watch Next, then I’m left with a space where that world, those characters, are absent.

Not so with Critical Role! The sheer wealth of content is breathtaking and it’s wonderful.

However the volume of content is such a small aspect of my love for this show. There’s also:

THE STORIES

THE CHARACTERS

THE IMPROV

THE BEAUTY

THE COMMITMENT

THE FANTASY

THE DANGER

THE COMEDY

THE EVER-EVOLVING DYNAMICS

THE REAL LIFE FAMILY OF FRIENDS who demonstrate love and acceptance and community and joy and pain and commitment to each other and to empathy... that’s where I became hooked.

I’m not one to have or keep very close friends. And for a long time I thought that was a Horrible Thing about me as a person, but the harder I tried to force myself to Be A Better Friend the more neurotic I became, I let down others, I felt fake and pushed myself to be something I’m not.

At the time I started listening to Vox Machina I was about... 2 years after a mental breakdown, 2 years into understanding and managing my adult adhd diagnosis and monthly therapy to learn how to not hate my entire being. Which had improved over the 2 years, but just months before Easter last year, things were Very Bad and all the work I’d been trying to do to manage my shitty brain felt all for nought, and so I had just begun anti-depressants - which I swear, changed my life.

But I also attribute that life-altering shift to becoming someone who actually wanted to live; who discovered who she was at the age of 31; who stopped hating herself and stopped trying to be everything to everyone... I attribute who I am today to the influence and inspiration of the love and creativity demonstrated by a bunch of nerdy voice actors playing dungeons and dragons.

I now understand that you can say dumb things and not be rejected by the people who love you. I realise that making mistakes actually IS the best way to learn. I discovered that it’s absolutely ok to not do everything, and if you need to become obsessed with a podcast about dungeons and dragons to actually start saying no to things, that’s ok too.

Thanks to these guys - Matt, Marisha, Liam, Sam, Taliesin, Laura, Travis, Ashley, Brian and the whole team - for the first time in my life, in this past year since I began watching Critical Role... I learned that I kinda like who I am and that as long as I stay true to that, and love others in whatever ways I can, that I can actually relax and there’s a lot of fun to be had (and in a shocking turn of events, I no longer believe that I would be better off not existing! So that’s good!)

The stories they have created, the community they have grown, the love and affection they have for each other and the absolutely joy they have for their game and all the crazy risks they’ve taken and meaningful statements they’ve made - Critical Role is... I just don’t think I’ll ever have the right words to express what I’m trying to say. They just speak to my heart and soul - not just the two campaigns, but so much extra content - namely Talks Machina & Between The Sheets & All Work No Play - that have branched out from the original game (to be fair, Critical Role technically spun off from All Work No Play...) seeing and hearing and being inspired by the Actual Human Beings is such a beautiful thing.

So. Anyway. This got out of hand, but it was either this or giving up and not saying anything at all. And i think maybe they’d prefer we shared things we are grateful for, the things that inspire and change us.

There’s still so much I could say, but instead I’ll just say this: my very first memory of Critical Role is @assuredgrave turning to me at work, in fits of laughter, telling me about how a certain gnome bard ran alone into a house full of enemies, transformed into a triceratops up against a household of crossbow-armed guards and a Goliath, gets stuck in a door turns back into a gnome, slides across a table, dimension doors onto the roof, turns invisible, drinks a fire-breathing potion, and spewed fire from off the roof, before using a giant magic hand to swat the bad guy away, then falling into it to carry himself away from the burning house. What utter chaos and hilarity and adventure to be discovered.

Thank you Critical Role.