#bottle conditioned

[herebebeer]

Strong and slightly different! Fullers 1845 is full bodied and strong. Certainly hit the mark on the night I drink it.

[icewindandboringhorror]

Little bright colored outfit with a fun vest ~

(shoes from ebay like 10 years ago. everything else is thrifted)

[essektheylyss]

it is not only the years that start coming and don't stop coming, but also pretty much everything else as well, and not least, Tasks

[braceletofteeth]

1x01 || 1x04

[tomatoluvr69]

Post-Helene diary 10/16/2024. (As a general warning, lots of talk about death, including children)

Life (in the city at least) is slowly inching back to normal. I’m still out of work. Schools will be closed at least a month, all told. And it’s getting cold. An outlying town a stone’s throw north of the city, where I have a couple friends, got snow last night; one of them slept on our couch. Still no running water, signal is still fucked, and the power goes on and off. But having power is such a luxury, so you can boil the water you bring home and microwave and refrigerate food. Still struggling with morale, but getting more and more able to get out of bed & take care of myself, and forcing myself to be around people when I can, which really helps. Hoping to host a movie night maybe this weekend, we’re all super fried and it’d be nice to gather in a super low-stakes way.

Had a burial yesterday. The man was shrouded, and lowering him into his grave meant touching his body through thin fibers. He died on the third of October, a couple days after the storm, so not a drowning death, but I’m not sure what the cause was. The family was able to be present for this one, and the ceremony moved me, I’m so profoundly honored to have had the opportunity to do this through no merit of my own. It’s good work, to which I feel well-suited. But it’s strange to shovel dirt onto the decedent while his wife and children look on. They were all new to ecoburial, the man hadn’t chosen it the way many in the sanctuary have; it’s what’s called an at-need plot (and folks, WNC is at need right now, lol). You could tell that the informality and wooded surrounds of the setting unsettled them at first, but the way things are done there is far more ancient and meaningful than at a conventional lawn cemetery, with its mandatory cement vaults, embalming fluids, and non-biodegradable casket materials, and we encouraged people come up to lay soil, aerate the first layer with sticks to aid in microbial access, fill in more soil if they wished and lay pine straw over the finished mound for erosion control and seed germination. I believe strongly in ecoburial’s capacity for closure, that seeing the shrouded body be covered, and being involved in digging and closing the grave, or pallbearing/lowering the decedent, can be a powerful way to process death. People used to/still do die at home. People wash their loved ones’ bodies, braid their hair, burn incense over them, sew them into shrouds, lay them out unembalmed and unrefrigerated in their own homes; in 21st century America we are cold strangers to death— everything happens behind steel doors. (Even hearses are outmoded— odds are you’ve driven down the highway next to a Toyota Sienna or somesuch that’s been retrofitted to transport bodies to and from funeral homes, hospitals, mortuaries, crematories, and burial grounds, and you had no idea.) Ecoburial removes this gulf, and I believe it’s especially crucial in the aftermath of the wide-scale death and destruction our region has seen. But the cemetery is tiny, and can only take a sliver of the storm’s dead— only a couple plots remain unsold. The admin was looking at purchasing more land, but the woman at the helm of that drowned with her entire family in a flash flood.

A girl we know works/worked at a mortuary that was along the river— drove by there the other day on my way home, the obliteration is eerie, they were gutting it for demo. Driving near any river right now still has the surreal, gloatingly detached feeling of a soundless dream, especially along roads you took all the time before the flood. The building had been nondescript before, just a medium warehouse looking structure with vinyl siding. But the bodies stored inside went unrefrigerated and were exposed to floodwaters, an aspect of the disaster few people without contacts or experience in deathcare would consider. Imagine the times you’ve been grieving a family member— now imagine phones are off, the mortuary’s been obliterated, and you’re stranded in your building for a week with no information or answers.

Found out about the death of a little boy, first or second grade, who attended one of the schools whose students I work with. He wasn’t my student, just a classmate of some of mine, but I still find myself really broken up over it. He was around the same age as [best friend]’s coworker’s boys, 7 and 9, who drowned in [outlying county], and I know they’re not mine to grieve— but working with so many kids in that exact age range in our community i’m so acutely aware of the caliber of loss. It hits me in these overpowering waves. Nobody in Appalachia knew to fear a hurricane, you know? Life here has shifted tremendously.

After the burial, we ate some cold lunches and a random packet of imported Japanese grape candies, joking grimly and catching up on an out-of-the-way bench near an Iranian woman’s grave and a couple adelgid-ridden hemlocks, where we wouldn’t be heard by the lingering members of the funeral party. Then, donned chaps and ear pro/eye pro to buck a bunch of trees downed by the storm around the land. I like chainsawing, but I lost a ton of physical strength after my ribcage fracture this summer, and I definitely feel it when doing manual labor. The difference is palpable. But bucking is easy, it requires no brainpower, and my friends just told me which trees to cut, while they worried about tension and felling. But both burials and saw work is quite physical and my stamina is beyond shot— definitely felt it today. And I got fucking DOMS in my back!!!!???? lmao. Hung low most of the morning because my volunteer childcare thing got canceled— it stormed, of all fucking things.

It’s getting cold. It’ll dip below freezing tomorrow night, and my window’s still out; I may sleep on the couch in the living room, which sucks, but I’m gripped by severe fear for all the people in the region who have nowhere to go; when I drove with my friend through his neighborhood in Swannanoa we saw families whose prefab/mobile homes got swept down the river, gone forever and destroyed, camped out in tents along the riverbank. Tens of thousands are still lacking power and gas to heat their homes— we are in the south, but we are up in the highest mountains in the entire eastern US. People will be unable to clean themselves because washcloth baths will be untenable in the cold. People will freeze to death in their homes, tents, and cars. It just feels like wave after wave of horror keeps hitting the region. Even though life begins to be bearable for those of us in the city— groceries, internet! Showers at the YMCA!— you cannot enjoy it amid the destruction. It’s a really weird feeling to be one of the lucky ones. Just sheer dumb luck. There’s no wrapping your head around it, when old classmates lost family and watched as their homes were swept away, their farm animals drowned. Survivor’s guilt is fucking insane. It’s really insane.

Though I’m worried about what two months’ rent and utilities is gonna be like without any work, my morale is slowly ratcheting upwards. Three of my friends are leaving the city forever in the upcoming weeks, which is a tremendous blow. One of my favorite haunts, the indie cinema in the river arts district, was obliterated beyond repair— I nearly cried seeing those photos. I’ll be stuck watching Joker and Beetlejuice sequels at the fucking Cinemark forever now I guess. And the Blue Ridge Parkway, where I went to run and camp and drive and picnic, is closed indefinitely. But I believe that many of my other frequent haunts will come back, unless, like many of the businesses dependent on a tourist economy in the height of leaf season, they crumble financially. But the tiny little cinema is a huge loss. We fucking adored that place. And you could tell it was the product of its owners’ passion and love, and filled with character, quirk, and charm. Truly no idea how different life here will be over the next months and years. Definitely altered— but how much? I can’t imagine living in Marshall, or having a studio in the RAD, or working in Swannanoa. Again, I’m so lucky. But it’s gonna be a really hard couple of months and years here.

The long and short of it is that life is getting easier for some of us, myself included, and though the trauma is at times genuinely incapacitating— I feel as though I am crawling towards feeling better. Being able to shower and launder my clothing in my own home will be huge, but still weeks away by the sound of things. I’m really wary of the coming months but cautiously optimistic— I am starting to feel alive again, and enjoy things, and think about things that aren’t potable water access, and the drowned. But it will take time to recover. To give some context, to Americans at least— think of what would need to happen for your public schools to shutter for an entire month, county wide (I don’t know much at this point about the surrounding counties’ schools, some will start earlier, some are still fucked indefinitely). All that being said, though, it is beginning to get easier. And I have people to lean on, and the capacity to hold up others when they lean on me. My home is intact and I have shelves full of food, and a stovetop to cook it on. And I watched a movie a few days ago! We’re crawling out of it bitches.

Ok, I have to go haul flush water now, lmao, time to drive my reeking whip around to a bunch of ramshackle old baptist churches in the area to see which ones still have big unmanned water totes in their parking lots. How does it feel to help a member of the LGBT community!!!!!!

[tj-crochets]

No crafting updates today, but I did bake a spiced pumpkin cake! And I made salted caramel sauce this weekend, so tomorrow I'll make the salted caramel frosting. My hip's doing better than it was yesterday, but now the muscles around my knee on that same side are rebelling, so still no iron or rotary cutter for me

[howldean]

i have to keep drinking water even though i’m not thirsty. because surgery. and i’m watching supernatural so my mom said ok make up a drinking game. so every time jared does his un-acting face journey. i drink water

[bacchuschucklefuck]

I love how you completely changed everyone’s wardrobe for the Beach Episode, save for gorgug’s hoodie (do they take it in the water?) do you wanna talk about the outfit choices at all?

I mean there's not a lot to talk about there I think? I'm a big fashion-focused character design artist, I'll say that, but a lot of that I can't really translate into words sadly... there are just certain character-specific silhouettes that once u've picked out u can hang onto to give them new clothes and it'll usually be good that's kinda how I do it. I fully see gorgug going Anywhere in that hoodie tho I think by this point babygirl's like I have a theory it's indestructible and I intend to test it

[fisheito]

kuya is such a particular peepaw princess. my golie. he wears SPF 800, carries a lacey purple parasol, and dons massive UV-blocking sunglasses every time he steps into the sun adn huey is just like

uh. ok. message received. i'll take u to the sunless grimdark automaton country next time

[nocapesdahling]

Preparing for a visit from a vampire:

[ink-asunder]

Me desperately reaching for the expired bottle of equate aloe vera gel every time I experience a skin condition that lasts more than 10 days:

[fizzseed]

”i’m fine”

”no, try again”

i need to sit down

[kerink]

guy who literally cant stop thinking about lubelle seeing cecil as a washed up deadbeat who dragged carlos down when he was vulnerable then baby trapped him, and lubelle and her team pitying carlos and wanting to help him because they miss the man he used to be, but carlos keeps avoiding them pushing them away dragging cecil and his team away from fights, looking at them with sad and tired eyes and asking them to just leave him alone

[peaches2217]

Y’all already know wtf is goin’ on

Help me

[themme--fatale]

king of making myself late to a first date bc i tried to go run an errand on a bike in 30° weather full sun and gave myself heat exhaustion

[mirrortouchedsea]

rinniki + 21 or 5 🥺

Oh these are also both so cute but I'll go with 5 methinks

ask game

…where it doesn’t hurt.

---

Shit. Niki let go of the knife and drew his finger up to his mouth. He licked the blood off before assessing the damage. It wasn't deep but he'd have to have a band-aid on it for a few days and Rinne would never let him hear the end of it. That almost hurt more than the cut itself.

Niki walked over to the sink and turned on the water, taking a towel and gently cleaning his the cut. Where did they put the antiseptics again?

He jumped as a pair of arms wrapped around his torso.

"Oi, Niki, whatcha doin'?" Niki dropped the towel.

"Dishes. Leave me alone." He elbowed the man, his boyfriend, and grabbed for the box of band-aids on the counter.

"That doesn't look like dishes to me Niki-kyun~ Didya hurt yourself?" Rinne poked at Niki's shoulder. "Do ya need your Rinne-kun to kiss it all better?"

"Shut up Rinne-kun."

"Aw, don't be like that Niki~ c'mere." Niki had already finished putting the band-aid on when Rinne grabbed his hand and brought it to his lips. "There! All better!"

"You didn't even kiss the band-aid Rinne-kun!"