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intheticklecloset · 4 years ago

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Karaoke (My Hero Academia)

One Shot

Shipping: Kaminari x Deku (KamiDeku)

Summary: Kaminari isn't the best at karaoke, but when he gets his feelings hurt by Deku giggling at his efforts, Deku does everything in his power to make him feel better. ^^

A/N: I wrote this one especially for @kiyachi-tickles! While browsing through her blog a while back I saw that she really liked the KamiDeku shipping (although of course now I can't find that post for reference), so I set out to write one, since I don't see much of this pairing. I hope you like it! <3

Word Count: 1,197

~~~

Deku had learned a lot of things about Kaminari lately. He had a thing for keeping his hands and nails clean as much as possible. He enjoyed getting manicures, though he made Deku swear never to tell anyone else. He liked romance anime. Coffee was his favorite ice cream flavor.

But – above all else – Deku had learned that Kaminari was really, really bad at karaoke.

It wasn’t that he was bad at singing; he could hold a tune, and of course Deku thought he had a wonderful singing voice. But karaoke set the pace and tempo of the song for you, and that was the part Kaminari was bad at. He liked to improv his way through a song, setting his own tempo at random. But karaoke was unforgiving in that domain, and so when they played the instrumentals to some of their favorite songs while hanging out one night, Deku couldn’t help but laugh at how Kaminari struggled to keep up with the tempo that was set for him. To anyone else it would have sounded like he was just as good or bad as the next person, but to Deku, it was the funniest thing in the world.

Kaminari, however, took it personally.

“Let’s just shut it off,” he muttered, reaching for the laptop on his desk.

Deku grabbed his arm. “But why? Aren’t you having fun?”

“I was until I tried singing along. Now you’re laughing at me.”

“I’m not – okay, well, I am laughing at you, but not in a bad way! I’m not trying to be mean, I promise.” Deku tugged on his arm, drawing him closer. “I’m sorry. You sound great, Denks.”

“You don’t have to sugarcoat it just to make me feel better.”

“I’m not.” Deku shifted so he was facing his boyfriend, wrapping his arms around Kaminari’s neck. “Your singing voice is lovely. I mean it.”

Kaminari sighed, but there was a light pink flush to his cheeks now. “Can we just shut it off?”

Deku paused, then nodded. “If you really want to.”

Kami stopped the YouTube queue, and the room went silent.

“I hate karaoke,” the blonde muttered after a long moment.

“Come on, it wasn’t that bad.” Deku smiled. “You just like to set your own pace, that’s all. There’s nothing wrong with that.”

“You were laughing at me. It must have been bad.”

“I’m really sorry, Denki. I wasn’t trying to be mean about it. I just thought it was cute that you were having trouble keeping tempo, and I got the giggles. That’s all.”

“Hmph.” Kami grunted, slouching back down onto the floor. “Whatever.”

Deku grinned, poking his side. “Come on, I said I’m sorry. Can’t you forgive me?”

“Leave me alone.”

“Pleeeeease?” Deku mock-whined, poking him again, then again and again. With each poke Kami scooted further and further away until he was practically falling onto the floor. “Please forgive me, Denks? I’m sorry~”

“S-Stop it, Izuku,” Kami sputtered, doing his best to stay upset despite the ticklish shocks running through his nervous system. He reached to push his boyfriend away, but when he did so he lost his balance and fell onto his back on the floor.

Deku was on him in an instant, straddling his hips and poking up and down his sides. “Forgive me, Denki~ I’m so sorry for laughing at you~” Every word the green-haired boy spoke sounded teasy, and he knew it was driving Kaminari insane. “Please, Denki?”

“Stohohohop it,” Kami giggled, quickly losing his willpower to remain pouty. He tried to block Deku’s hands, but whenever he tried to protect one spot it only opened up another, and he was flustered and embarrassed and desperately trying to keep his laughter at bay. “Izuku, stohohohohohop!”

“Forgive meeeee,” Deku whined, jamming his hands underneath Kami’s arms and tickling harshly. “Denkiiiii~”

“Nahahahahahahahahaha!” Kami squealed, clamping his arms to his sides too late to actually protect himself. He squirmed on the ground at his boyfriend’s mercy, giggling hysterically. “Stahahahahahahahahap!”

“If you won’t forgive me, I’ll just keep tickling you~” Deku giggled too, unable to help himself. This was all so silly, but he loved it, and he knew Kaminari did, too. “Tickle, tickle, tickle!”

“D-Dohohohohon’t – don’t tehehehehease me, Izuku! Stahahahahahahahap!”

Deku decided to be a little bit mean, and he reached behind him to blindly grasp at Kaminari’s knees – his weakest spot. “Oh, Denki~ Your singing voice is so lovely~ I looooove you~”

“STAHAHAHAHAHAP!!” Kami screeched, giggles bursting into laughter when his boyfriend successfully grabbed his kneecap and squeezed it, hard. “NOHOHOHOHOHO, IZUKU!!”

“I looooooove you!”

Kaminari squealed with laughter, allowing himself a couple of moments to indulge before he mustered up the strength to sit up and grab Deku around his waist, finding his hips with ease and kneading there.

“NOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO!!” Deku cried, instantly ceasing his own tickle attack to defend himself, a genuine smile replacing his teasy one. “DENKIHIHIEHEHEHEHE!!”

Denki chuckled, wrestling Deku onto his back on the floor and straddling him the way he’d been just seconds ago, slipping his fingers just underneath the waistband of Deku’s shorts to get at the really, really ticklish spots. Deku howled with laughter.

“Still think it’s funny, huh, Izuku?” Kami teased relentlessly, beaming at the way the freckled boy’s face lit up like a fireworks show at the teasing, his legs kicking frantically behind him, absolute hysterics flying from his lips. “If it’s so funny, then go ahead and laugh!”

“AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!! PLEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEASE!!” Deku screamed, grabbing Kami’s wrists but too weak to do anything more than hold them. “NOHOHOHOHOHOHO!! I’M SOHOHOHOHOHOHOHORRY!!”

“What are you sorry for exactly, hmm?” Kami teased, leaning down to murmur directly in Deku’s ear, his breath tickling his neck. “For laughing at me? For tickling me? Which is it, Izuku?”

Deku squealed, throwing his head back with a shriek when Kami kneaded into a particularly sensitive bundle of nerves. He kicked his legs for a few more seconds before it registered how close Kami was now, and he released his wrists in favor of grabbing his sides and tickling.

Kaminari yelped, but didn’t move, determined to stay right where he was. He had Deku right where he wanted him, and he was not about to give that up because of a little tickling. “Sahahahahahay it, Izuku! Tehehehehell me why you’re sohohohohorry!”

“I’M SOHOHOHOHOHOHORRY FOR LAHAHAHAHAHAUGHING AT YOHOHOHOU!!”

“That’s it?”

“YEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHES!!”

“Yohohohohou’re not sohohohohorry for tickling mehehehe?”

Kami kneaded just right into the hollows of Deku’s hips, and Deku tossed his head back with a scream of laughter, gripping Kami’s sides harder, making the blonde giggle even more.

“NOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO!!”

“You’re nohohohohohot?”

“PLEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEASE, DENKI!!”

Kaminari let out a few more giggles before capturing Deku’s mouth with his, effectively muffling both of their ticklish cries at once. For a few more moments, he kept kneading that death spot on his boyfriend’s hips, but gradually he let up, sliding his hands further up Deku’s body, up to his chest, and Deku responded by sliding his hands up Kaminari’s back, and soon they had forgotten all about tickling entirely. All that mattered was each other, and the rest of the night was filled with kisses and cuddles and lots and lots of love.

#fanfiction #tickle fic #boku no hero #my hero academia #bnha #mha #denki #kaminari #izuku #midoriya #deku #kamideku #karaoke #cute #fluff #playful #teasing #tickling #ticklish #tickle

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lady-literature · 3 years ago

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So I know there’s a couple of eldritch horror!izuku fics or like, this fic where obsessive love is a whole ass theme (but not in an abusive way? I think, it might just be the mental illness luv) and it definitely has The Vibes (@ that murder scene tho *chef’s kiss*), but has anyone done a fic where the Midoriyas are just like,,, the Addam’s Family?

Cause I thought about it and now I can’t get it out of my head.

Like, can you imagine how chaotic and gleefully creepy Izuku would be if he just,,, grew up as an unkillable Addams? How reckless he would be but almost in that way of, not quite determination but rather just, ‘oh this is insanely dangerous, how exciting!’

Anyway, I don’t have any actual plot for this, but I do have A Vibe and a random scattering of scenes rattling around in my brain:

Izuku is born, pale as death with eyes as green as acid. He nearly kills his mother in the process, blood pooling beneath her and exhaustion clawing at her chest. But when she holds him, her dearest bundle of woe, she trails her fingertips along the blood she hadn’t let the doctors clean him of, and she laughs.

“How delightful,” she says. “Just born and already you’re trying to kill your Mother? Oh, how jealous Cousin Morticia will be when she hears.”

***

Izuku’s two the first time he sticks a fork in a light socket. His hair stands on end and his fingers blister and the whole block loses electricity. When Inko finds him, he’s pouting as he shoves the fork back into the socket only without the shower of sparks he so enjoyed the first time. Inko laughs as she picks him up, her hands stinging with static electricity for a moment.

***

Izuku grows up drinking wolfsbane tea and eating such delicious sweets as: chocolate chip, almond cookies (with extra helpings of cyanide for flavor) and cakes with belladonna frosting for special occasions. Inko mixes rat poison into his pancakes and waffles to give it a kick. A kid tried his sandwich once and had to be taken to the hospital. It’d been made with apricot jam, but his mother likes to crush the seeds up and mix them in.

Afterward, Inko has to explain to him that other kids can’t eat the same things he does.

Izuku silently wonders if he should stop sharing his cookies with Kacchan.

(Ultimately, Izuku decides that Kacchan wouldn’t let him stop anyway. And besides, he’s surely built up the resistance to it by now. What harm could it do?)

***

Inko has a garden in their backyard. Most of the plants are either carnivorous or poisonous. All of them are vaguely sentient. Izuku adores all of them and feeds the carnivores dead animals he finds.

(It’s best not to wonder how or where he found them.)

***

Inko only takes Izuku to the park when he wants to play with Katsuki.

Otherwise, she packs the picnic basket, and they set off to the cemetery. Inko wanders between gravestones, leaving behind offerings and greeting old friends while Izuku runs amok playing with the younger ghosts.

Sometimes, his new playmates like him so much they never want him to leave.

Izuku’s gotten very good at playing dead. “I just don’t want them to feel bad,” he explains to her as she cleans off all the blood. “It’s not their fault we’re hard to kill after all.”

Inko hums and kisses his forehead. Her lips come away smeared with red. “That’s very kind of you, little viper.”

***

Izuku grows and grows and grows.

There’s a certain kind of darkness that hangs around him. A frigid air, as cold as a gravestone in winter. It scares away most of the children, and Izuku makes it through life without being bothered for the most part.

Those children who do walk right past the warning sign though, they never last long anyway.

The voices that lovingly whisper secrets into his ears are not as kind to the children who dared try and harm their own. Izuku has an air of madness around him.

And often, it is those around him who succumb to its addictive taste.

***

Izuku never quite understood his cousin Pugsely’s obsession with explosives. They seemed… flashy, in his opinion. He much preferred a good knife, or the clever little mind games Wednesday liked to employ. Subtle things, bloody things.

But then, when Izuku is hovering around nine years old, he watches Kacchan reduce a tree to nothing more than splinters and ash, screaming obscenities and death threats the whole time.

Izuku has known Kacchan for years, has been around his explosive friend and his explosive quirk for years. But, well. Compared to the things he’s seen Pugsley do, Kacchan hardly seemed to control anything more than sparks.

Izuku isn’t really sure what changes his mind. But all he knows, is that as Kacchan stands there, panting, his palms bleeding from the yet too large explosions and the ricocheting wood, and Izuku finds he has a newfound appreciation for things that go boom.

***

Izuku decides he wants to become a hero for two reasons.

The first, is that Kacchan wants to be a hero and Izuku figures he may as well join him.

The second, is that his father is already Japan’s most dangerous villain, and while Izuku is nothing if not determined, he thinks the two hundred year head start his father has is a bit unfair. So Izuku’s going to forge a new path instead of trying to outshine his father at what he does best.

Besides, he thinks, isn’t it just a bit poetic of him? The whole, father and son on opposite sides of a conflict thing?

Dad’ll probably be annoyed, but he’ll also find it funny and be more proud about his initiative, so.

#bnha #addams family #izuku midoriya #boku no hero academia #my typewriter #hi i love the addams family #make izuku an addams 2021 #i seriously have no direction with this but it won't leave my head so... here

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thessalian · 2 years ago

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Thess vs Nurturing Instinct

So I’ve finally convinced myself to stop Doing Shit and just have the relaxing weekend I promised myself. Because, seriously, I promised that THIS weekend would be a nice relaxing weekend to let my body recover from the insane pain flares of the week.

But I needed groceries so that involved unpacking them when they got delivered and cleaning out the fridge. And I wanted to do some gardening and Did Myself An Ow. And then more gardening today, with an emergency repotting and a fair bit of reorganisation. And then I realised that the doormat I keep inside so I’m not tracking crap onto the carpet (crap as the carpets already are) probably needed to be shaken and beaten out onto the balcony because dust. And then since I was putting the gardening stuff away I figured I’d do a quick tidy of the dining table. And then I had to break down the boxes my stuff came in and take them out to the recycling, and took out the few other bits of recycling that had accumulated while I was at it, and also used that ‘being outside’ for a trip to the corner shop because I forgot to order cooking oil. And then I finally went to make myself a cup of coffee and needed to refill the sugar tin and had a bit of a spill so I had to wipe down the counter a bit, and then I noticed some other spots on the counter behind the stove top that needed a bit more attention. And since some of the sugar I spilled and wiped up ended up on the floor, I needed to break out the vacuum cleaner because we had a cockroach problem the other year and I don’t want to be the cause of a repeat of that mess...

I did stop myself before vacuuming the entire house. That’ll probably be tomorrow, on top of laundry. I swear, so much for relaxing weekends. Still, I know myself well enough to know that if I feel like cleaning, I should do so, because otherwise I can executive dysfunction myself right into a mess too large to fix easily.

Anyway, thing I noticed when I went out to the shops. You know how some of us get with stray animals, cooing endearments and offering affection and being upset and worried when they look injured or mistreated?

Well, apparently I’m like that with plants now. Any plants. All plants.

I pass a local cemetery when I go to the corner shop. It’s largely fenced off with wooden fencing along that particular road. Ivy grows across both sides of it, and the ivy shares the inside space with a truly prodigious amount of blackberry bramble. Like, the entire cemetery is ringed with blackberry bushes and every late summer / early autumn, I’ll go out there with a plastic bag and do some harvesting at least once, and I’ll be plucking a handful of berries to eat on my way to work or back home every work day. (I plan to make blackberry jam this year. Strawberry too, if my strawberries produce fruit the way I hope they will.)

Anyway, the ivy. I noted that it’s drying up fairly badly in sections, and gone all brown and crunchy. I never paid that much mind before and now I’m standing there going, “You poor thing! Don’t worry; it looks like it’s going to rain soon...” I notice the snapdragons that grow under somebody’s hedge and can’t help thinking that they’re probably really deprived of light down there and wonder if anyone would mind if I just ... brought a pot and gave it a good home. I am appalled that no one seems to be taking care of the potted begonias the management association puts by the front door to the block of flats and might go down there with plant food and a watering can at this rate.

As for the blackberry bushes? Mostly today it was, “Hello, bees!”

Look, clearly nurturing my plants has done me some good. This is the best I’m going to get, since I’m not really allowed pets in here. Though I imagine that things like maybe goldfish would be okay, and that might actually be an idea. My gardening has been keeping me sane and some fish would probably add to that. I mean, I’d prefer rats, but even with the recent push for them to be recognised as the great pets they are, people still look askance at them (which is stupid, since this is the country that started breeding pet fancy rats in the first fucking place, so why the hell they need to be reminded that rats are not plague factories is beyond me). Fish are easier. Also way less expensive, particularly since there isn’t a lot a vet can do with a sick neon tetra or whatever.

Summary: I can’t really have pets (I’m not going to give a pet a home unless I am absolutely sure that they and I can live to a decent standard, which includes food, sanitation, enrichment, and pet insurance since there’s no NHS for pets - though fish are an option and small rodents might be on the table), I’m not having kids (same reasons, partly with the addition of asexuality but fostering or adoption might be on the table if I was healthy enough physically and financially to ensure a child a good life), and I want something to nurture. If those things are green and leafy, that’s fine. They may not provide the usual compensations, but they’re pretty and they feed me. I will not be like the kid in The Giving Tree; my plants feed me, and I will give them everything they need to thrive in return. Sometimes that means more than water and plant food and sunshine. Sometimes that means apologies for overwatering or encouragement of the “don’t worry; you’ll feel better soon” variety when something is wilting due to overly cramped roots.

As for my reactions to plants I see outside? Well, fuck it; if I can give all the encouraging words in the world to my oregano when I’m repotting it, I can spare a few for the ivy around the cemetery or the snapdragons down the block. Words cost little, but mean a lot.

#Thess on gardening #Thess is a motherfucking adult

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dammitadolfnomorecake · 4 years ago

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Once Bitten, Twice Stupid prt 183

182

For the next two days, Keith wolfed out at night... then woke the following morning not remembering anything. He still seemed jittery and on edge. Rieva had said he’d finally got the hang of walking, then running, wolf howls filled the night as the three of them did whatever werewolves did. Keith slept most of the day away, Lance removing his clothes from where he’d packed them, trying to make Keith comfortable. This was hard for him. Keith not remembering coming home and being reassured sucked. They hovered in each other’s space but there were no kisses or words of love. Worst of all was when Lance reacted to Keith’s scent. Getting off seemed like such a chore, and never as good as it felt with Keith.

The day after the third night Keith slept like the dead on the sofa. He hadn’t come to Lance’s room. He didn’t use Lance’s bathroom. There was some kind of clear invisible line there that hurt like all hell, driving him into an anxiety attack over the idea they’d never be able to have what they had again. He felt as if he’d cried a river of tears, crying himself to sleep or passing out from not being able to control his breathing, though that was unlikely. With Keith home, Lance had let Hunk and Pidge know not to come around, of course they insisted on seeing Keith as soon as it was safe. Sending them a photo of Keith sleeping on the sofa, Lance let them know tomorrow should be okay in the group chat, Shay wanting to come too. Maybe it was his way of having back up should things blow up with Keith, but he didn’t know how to close this distance on his own. Keith needed everybody to support him right now. To show him they were all just relieved he was awake and alive. He could wait... no matter how much it sucked.

It was near on the middle of the night that Keith finally roused. Lance in the kitchen, indulging in his need for ice cream and watching cat videos on his phone. Stumbling in, Keith went straight for the coffee machine. Some things never changed. He didn’t seem to notice Lance at first, not until he’d poured his cup of coffee and sat down at the kitchen table. Lance nearly getting up to leave, only stopping himself when he realised Keith was staring at him.

Having to say something, Lance took a deep breath, unable to push that fake smile to his lips. Things weren’t okay and a smile wasn’t going to fool anyone

“How are feeling?”

Keith blinked at him, as if he didn’t expect Lance to care and it hurt

“Um... tired. Thanks for letting me stay”

“This is your home too, you know”

“Um... I... uh... feel like we should talk but I don’t know what to say”

“Neither do I. Do you feel better for having had your first moon?”

“Actually, yeah. I don’t feel as short tempered”

“That’s good. That means your ego’s settling”

If someone inserted cricket noises in the silence that followed, it would have been less awkward. They knew how to talk to each other, but both of them seemed to be failing. Keith took a deep sip of his coffee, he must have made it more milk than coffee or he was now impervious to heat. Placing the cup back down, Keith sighed

“I don’t know what to do”

“What are you thinking?”

“Do you still love me?”

Lance answered instantly. Keith was the foundation of his heart, even if he wasn’t too sure how Keith felt about him now

“Yes. That hasn’t changed at all”

“Then do you think we can work this out?”

“I’d like to try... but no pressure. You’re dealing with so much right now”

Keith sighed. A sigh could be a hundred different sounds, this one sounded sad to him

“I don’t want to hurt you”

That sounded like Keith wanted to walk away. Lance waited for the “but” only for it not to come, so he supplied it himself

“But?”

“I don’t know. I just... I don’t want to hurt you. I’m scared of this ego thing. I thought I got it... but it really isn’t something that can be explained”

“No. It isn’t, is it. I don’t know what I can do to help. I love you too much to give up on you, but at the same time, I don’t want you to feel pressured by me”

“I feel like there’s this thing between us. I hate it. I can’t kiss you. I can’t hold you. I feel like... shit. I’m not blaming you. I know you didn’t want me to turn, yet... I wonder if you were really okay with me dying instead. If that’d been better”

Keith could kindly go fuck himself if he thought so little of Lance. Pushing his chair back, he smooshed the lid back onto the ice cream container, bending the spoon up in it

“Lance?”

“Don’t fucking say anything”

Keith was confused by him snapping. Lance moving to put the ice cream away

“What’s that supposed to mean?!”

Throwing the freezer door open, Lance jammed the ice cream in. There was enough space in his carefully crafted game of freezer Tetris, Lance too angry to care

“I don’t know. Tell me, Keith, how could you ever fucking think I would be okay with you being dead?! Do you really think I’m all like “he’s a fucking wolf now, better not give two shits?!”. Is that it? You don’t think I fucking care?! Of course I didn’t want you dead! I love you! You are the other half of my fucking soul! You’re the one who woke up and said you wanted to be dead instead! I watched you laying there, day after day, not fucking waking up! I waited! I begged you to wake up! I was against the turn because it happened without your permission! You think you’re the only one feeling this distance?! I want to kiss you! I want to hug you! I want to tell you I love you! But I don’t know what’s alright and what’s too much!”

Slamming the door closed, the fridge rocked in place

“You packed my things”

“I packed them because I thought you’d choose Shiro over me! Because I know egos are messed up! I thought you’d need space or time, and I didn’t want you feeling like you had to pity the poor stupid vampire who prayed for his lover to wake up every single fucking day! If you don’t want to be here, you don’t have to be! If you don’t want to know me or the twins, you can fucking leave! I didn’t give up on you! I was trying to do right by you! Don’t you know being around me could have sent you insane?! Coran could have had to kill you because your ego clashed with mine!”

He’d woken the twins up. An unexpectedly hard kick making him stumble a little and grab for the bench

“Lance!”

Fixing Keith in his gaze through teary eyes, Lance shook his head

“Don’t call my name if you don’t want me! I can’t take this! I’m not that strong and I can’t be mad at you”

“I didn’t say I didn’t want you”

“You asked if I still loved you. It’s the same thing! I love you! I haven’t stopped loving you! I don’t care that you’re a werewolf, you’re still the man I love!”

Keith climbed from his chair, acting out a scene that’d happened a thousand times before as he wrapped Lance up in a hug

“I still love you. But I don’t know how you can accept me. I don’t know how to be a werewolf... I don’t know what I’m doing. I don’t know who I am any more”

“You’re still you! Why can’t you see that?! We all still fucking love you! We all still care. We all still want you around... I still want you around! It’s killing me not being about to hold you! Or kiss you! Or tell you I love you!”

Keith was probably half deafened as Lance wailed. Keith’s scent wasn’t as “wet doggy” as before. He could still pick up his boyfriend’s scent... he knew egos sucked and Keith was thrown in the deep end here, but why couldn’t his love be enough?!

“I’m sorry...”

“Don’t apologise! I know I’m overreacting! I know it!”

Keith nuzzled into Lance’s hair, kissing the soft locks

“I love you, too. I do. That hasn’t changed”

“Then why is it so hard?!”

“I don’t know. I don’t want to give up on us”

“Then tell me what I need to do to make you see I care...”

“I don’t know. I don’t know how to fix us but I don’t want to lose you either”

“Then what do we do!? I don’t want to keep missing you even when you’re in the same room as me”

“I don’t want to keep missing you either. I love you. I know I do. I just don’t get why my ego prickles or gets mad so easily”

“Because it’s new... I thought I got things after spending so much time with Rieva and Matt, but I can’t seem to... to get it. You said you didn’t like my smell”

“I didn’t... you smelt... too much. But it’s not so bad now... I kind of want to rub against you”

“Because I smell like death and animals use dead things to hide their scent”

“Maybe, but you also smell... like... really good... in a way. I can’t explain it. What do I smell like to you?”

Lance sniffled, his nose all snotty and blocked up. He really wasn’t supposed to be getting too emotional. He’d experienced enough small waves of arousal without hitting that heat stage, and if he did hit that heat stage with Keith, he was worried Keith would freak out

“You smell... like you. Like wet dog but I can still smell you. It’s gotten stronger... like you’ve been working out and covered in sweat”

“Is it bad?”

“No... not bad...”

“That’s okay then... Fuck, babe. I don’t want to hurt you... I don’t know my limits anymore”

“Welcome to my world. A tad too much strength and I’ve broken a jar...”

“Maybe I shouldn’t be opening jars for the time being”

“It’s probably safest... I think I should go to bed... Too much stress is bad for my body right now”

“Can I come with you?”

Lance didn’t think that wise but he craved Keith. He craved being held by him. It made him want to chuck all the confusing shit out the window and not think things through

“Don’t ask me like that. I can’t say no and I don’t know if I should be saying no as your ego forms”

Keith had calmed down so much. He’d come back that first night, Coran saying he missed Lance, that he missed his mate

“I get it...”

No. Now Keith sounded sad... He didn’t want Keith being sad or to be making things harder for the man he loved

“Can we just... try cuddling?”

“I’d like to try”

“Okay... but... um... the bedroom isn’t... how you remember it”

“That’s okay. I just want to hold you some more. I want my ego to know you mean more to me than it does”

“Ego doesn’t work like that. Anything can set it off. Sometimes it not even something big”

“It should. I mean, I want it to settle and know you’re precious to me. I feel like I’m drowning and I don’t know who to turn to”

“You’re not... you have every single one of us who wants to be there for you. Pidge and Hunk wanted to come around to see you”

The innocent comment set Keith on edge. A low growl coming from the werewolf, followed by a sigh

“What was that? Why did I growl?”

“I don’t know... we’ll ask Coran in the morning. He’ll know”

“I hope so... Can I stay?”

“This has never not been your home too...”

“You said I should stay with Shiro...”

“Because I want to do whatever’s right by you... but I don’t want you to again... not really”

“Then we’ll talk to Coran in the morning. Do you want to bring the ice cream to bed?”

“Not really... let’s just... let’s just go and see how it goes”

“Okay, babe. We’ll work this out”

Tears rushed to fill Lance’s eyes again

“God, I hope so”

Keith didn’t know what he expected from being a werewolf, but it wasn’t this. Rieva and Matt had baby sat him through the moon, and now he had to learn how to have everything he wanted in life all over again... and not pop a raging boner while watching Lance sleep. Spooned around him, he’d tilted a little so he wouldn’t be directly stabbing Lance in the arse. Lance had been through a lot. Staying beside him when he’d been in a come. Putting up with his douche of an ego before the full moon. Trying to figure out how to help him and what he needed, while still scared that Keith didn’t have feelings for him anymore.

Keith hated Lance’s bed. A sheet, then a blanket. That was it. Not two or three blankets under them with another two or three on top of them. It felt barren. His boyfriend was pregnant. That... that meant a lot to him, that he was still Lance’s boyfriend, and hadn’t been dumped because of his arseholic ways. Lance had so much love and so much patience for him. He hadn’t lied when he said things had felt better now the full moon had passed, but he still didn’t feel fully settled. He’d noticed he’d rubbed up against a lot. As if he was trying to drown his scent out. He’d nearly licked his boyfriend’s shoulder, unsure why when he didn’t used to go around licking Lance for no apparent reason.

His new strength scared him. Every time he looked to his hands and found his fingernails were claws instead, he felt fear. Lance laying there felt... like the vampire was being too unguarded. He could tear Lance’s throat out before he’d have time to register what happened. Had Lance worked through this? Was that what he laid awake afraid of when Keith was human? Choosing to love a human had to be hard. He knew it was hard, but it was harder? than he’d known. He could hear Lance’s heart. Feel every single move of their twins inside of him. He could hear Matt going to the toilet. Rieva kissing him. Giggling with him. The privacy thing really was... weird. It’s existed and now it was gone. Would he make Lance happy? Being... a werewolf?

And if he made Lance happy, then would he lose Shiro whom he already hadn’t talked to in days. He knew Shiro acted to save him. He knew that. Yet he did kind of feel violated for not having the choice. And not just because it reminded him that Lance also hadn’t had a choice, but because he’d his brother break a promise from back before they’d met Lance. If they changed, if a hunt went wrong, they both chose death to the curse. That Shiro and Lance were fighting was bad enough. Lance was so close to Curtis and Keith to Shiro. Shiro’s time should be spent with his boyfriend, helping Curtis work through his demons from carrying and actual demon. He didn’t know much about what Curtis was going through, or how he was.

No. He’d been angry sack of shit.

Every time he insulted his ego, even mentally, he felt a kind of stab of anger from it. For 28ish years he’d been him. Now he didn’t feel like himself. Coran would be the first offer counselling, yet this seemed a waste if he was going to constantly be picked on by his ego. No wonder most werewolves were douches. Their egos really did pressure them. He didn’t want that. He didn’t want to keep being angry and keep arching up over nothing. Lance let him in, let him those close to their twins, how was Lance not afraid he’d turn them, or hurt them? He’d been afraid to spend too long with Shiro for much the same reasons.

Closing his eyes, Keith snuggled into Lance, wishing his head would shut up. As exhausted as he felt, he also felt a buzz under his skin to get up go running. Somehow the idea of training had lodged itself in his brain. If Coran kept him employed, he’d be a much better hunter in a lot of ways and a lot worse with this scent of his. It’d be easier to scent Shiro up and make believe he was a wolf, but it’d be a dead give away to vampires that they weren’t friendly or naive. That was all provided Shiro still wanted him as a partner. He didn’t know how to fix things with Shiro when things had never been this way between them. Shiro had had to kill Adam when he was a vampire. That was out of mercy. What happened if Keith lost himself to his ego and Shiro was forced to do the same thing? What happened to his family when he was no longer there to take care of them? Did he become a story to them?

Unable to sleep, Keith carefully slipped out from behind Lance. He had too many thoughts and things down south were starting to ache. Jerking off sounded like a chore, but maybe a good orgasm would finally get rid of his thoughts and the pent up sensation. Keeping his steps light, he’d reached the door before he’d known it. This speed thing was no joke. His head still thought he was sitting on the edge of Lance’s bed with him trying to convince himself that jerking off would help settle himself down.

Leaning against the bathroom counter, he’d barely pulled his sweats and underwear down to deal with his issue when Lance came shuffling, catching him holding his dick like a perv. Rubbing sleep out his eyes, Lance mumbled sleepily

“Keith?”

“What are you doing awake?!”

Screeching at Lance might not be the best way to play things cool... but this was Lance’s bathroom and he was panicked. Lance’s eyes widened, a blush appearing on his cheeks as he looked away

“I’m sorry! I felt you get out of bed and wanted to make sure you were okay! I’ll just... bed... go...”

Keith died a little more on the inside. He loved their sex life. He didn’t feel disgusted or revolted by his needs or Lance’s... now he kind of did. He’d wanted to care of things as quickly and as quietly as he could, then slip back to bed like it’d never happened

“I...”

“It’s okay! It’s okay... You do you, boo”

That seemed to make everything that much worse. He only felt like this because of his ego and because holding Lance felt right to him. It’d been so long since he had. Since they’d had sex. Thinking about Lance only proved to make that need between his legs worse

“I didn’t... know you were awake. I’ll... uh, take care of this... um... Go back to bed... Yeah, go back to bed and we’ll act like this never happened”

His voice was wobbly, he didn’t want Lance going back to bed, but he also didn’t want to jump Lance’s bones despite what his body was telling him

“It’s okay. I get it. You have needs”

Keith didn’t know why Lance sounded so sad about said needs

“It’s not... I mean... I didn’t want... you thinking you had to take care of things and...”

His hand was still wrapped around his dick. Why was his hand still wrapped around his dick?!

“I really do get it. I’ve jerked off too... no big deal... I’ll...”

Keith groaned at the thought. Had Lance fingered himself thinking of him? Had he moaned his name? Cried out for him? Fuck. He wanted to be in Lance. He wanted to bend him over the counter and fuck him until next year

“Keith?”

“You... you should go... I don’t think I can hold back”

Lance smelt so good. He could tell the vampire was turned on by the sight of him. He could smell how pregnant his lover was, and knew that scent would only get sweeter as the pregnancy progressed. Lance being Lance made it so damn hard to be respectful of him and his body when he was this aroused

“Uh. Yeah... um... I’ll do that. Good night... morning, good morning...”

As Lance climbed into bed, he grumbled about what an idiot he was before groaning deeply. Keith knew he wasn’t supposed to hear Lance scolding himself, but he found it cute. Lance was very cute. Fuck. Why did he have to love someone so cute?!

Jacking off didn’t take long. All he had to do was think of his boyfriend and his hips did the rest. Release felt amazing. Nearly as good as with Lance. If jerking off felt this good, he couldn’t wait to see what being inside Lance would be like. Cleaning up his mess, Keith made sure there was no traces left of the bathroom cupboard before rewashing his hands and heading to bed. Immediately Lance got out the other side. Keith feeling for though he knew he couldn’t reach him, feeling like he needed to apologise seeing his self love session had first happened, then been over in less than a minute

“I’m sorry... If you want me to go...”

“I’m going to stop you there. We don’t have to talk about, and right now, I am busting for the toilet. Jerking off happens”

“But...”

“It even happens really fast. Don’t let the bed get cold”

Keith’s soul clear left his body to yeet its self out the window. Lance didn’t need to rub it in... Not when Keith would have rather been rubbing it in him. Ugh. Next time he’d just go outside and jerk off where no one would ever catch him.

#once bitten twice stupid #oncebittentwicestupid #ashratherose

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theabominableblogger · 5 years ago

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My Reaction to “Birds of Prey“

*in best Roman Sionis impression* WHOOO!

Figured I might as well FINALLY watch it. On with the show!

*silently jams to the opening logos*

This animated intro is great.

*snorts at the little animation of how an egg gets fertilized*

Why is this animated Joker a different (and actually better) character design than what we got in Suicide Squad? Were we robbed of Letoker in full Joker suited glory? I think we were.

“Behind every successful man is a badass broad.” *points at screen in agreement*

I love Harley’s freaking rainbow apartment

The hyena!

This movie has the same amount of color saturation as “Pulp Fiction”

Freaking Bernie the Beaver is holding her tissues! We stan supportive friends!

*gasp* Cass!

This guy [Roman’s driver] looks an awful lot like Jon Hamm and that is never gonna go away

“It’s not a party without a little drama!” I love Ewan McGregor

*snorts in hilarity when Harley turns to address the audience about how much she doesn’t like Roman in front of Roman*

“Do give the Joker my [Roman] best.” Uhhh....

*jams the crap out to “Boss Bitch” by Doja Cat*

*laughs at Harley drunkenly giving relationship advice to a female bust in the club*

“Some people have the Eiffel Tower. Or Olive Garden.” Can we please hear the stories about Gotham’s Olive Garden?

Oh that shot [of Harley walking away from the Ace Chemicals explosion] is great

[Four Minutes Ago] *snorts in hilarity*

So far I actually really like Rosie Perez as Montoya.

Huntress!

*Huntress kills the mob people in the flashback* That was awesome. And the way Montoya steps back and forth to investigate the body is great.

“Harley Quinn just called open season on herself.” And oop.

God, seeing Ewan as Black Mask is really gonna throw me off but man this is gonna be a great performance.

*jaw drops in horror when Zsasz removes someone’s FACE*

JESUS CHRIST HOLY SHIT RATED “R” HUH?!?

“Is that a snot bubble?” Shit!

OHHHHH THAT SHOT OF ROMAN WITH THE MASK ON!!! AAAAAAHHHH!!

The SATURATION IN THIS MOVIE

Also the soundtrack and aesthetic in this movie is very... “Suicide Squad”-esque

Man that sandwich looks good

*jaw drops when Harley accidentally throws her sandwich into the road*

Also they de-saturated everything again hahaha

Oh my gosh that guy [”Happy”] is HUGE

[GRIEVANCE: COSMETIC VANDALISM] Yeah, that sounds about right

“Par-ley??” *snorts*

Her [Montoya’s] shirt....

Also why is she wearing that shirt at work?

This movie is giving me huge Tarantino vibes

Why does the actor that plays Montoya’s boss looks familiar?

Oh! He’s Rufus in “Supernatural.” Bobby’s kinda buddy!

“Ms. Montoya, we do have a dress code.” There we go.

They are really just going back and forth in the timeline to cover everything, aren’t they?

Harley’s using nonlethal rounds?

The action set pieces in this movie so far are awesome.

*says “Run, piggy, run!” along with Harley*

Of course Dinah is singing “This Is A Man’s World”

Also I’ve seen like a 20 second Twitter compilation of Roman saying the f-bomb and it’s glorious

“We could make our own family.” Oh snap.

WAIT THAT’S THE GUY WHOSE FACE ZSASZ REMOVED!

Does... Roman... like Dinah? Like... that? Or is this manipulation?

*chuckles when drunk Harley slides up next to Dinah at the bar*

*gets very uncomfortable at a guy trying to take advantage of a drunk Harley*

C’mon Dinah...

What’s the song playing here [when Dinah’s beating up the guys in the alley]?

Uh whatcha doing in the corner there, Zsasz?

“Oh sooongbirrddd?” Noo...

Did I just see a street sign that said “ANUS”?

So is Cass faking a broken wrist or does she actually have a broken wrist?

So far my favorite characters are Montoya and Dinah. Not gonna lie.

*has to muffle laughter when Roman does the mmkay hand sign*

“I mean, I like crossbows!” *giggles*

Holy shit, Zsasz is jealous of Dinah.

“Look at his little ears, the little haircut...” *insane giggling*

ZSASZ IS DYING IN THE BACK I LOVE THIS SONG

Dinah is clearly rethinking some life decisions while looking at that statue of Roman

*jams out to “Sway with Me” by GALAXRA*

*Cass robs Zsasz of the diamond* WHOOP!

*winces when Roman does acupuncture*

“SHE’s a chILDDD!!” *laughs*

ZSASZ

Ho shit that shot of Roman on top of the stairs looking down at Harley

“VOTED FOR BERNIE” HAHAHA

*Harley completely derails Roman’s villain monologue* THIS IS AMAZING

HE [Roman] GOT A BOWL OF POPCORN

*Zsasz licks Harley’s cheek* EEUUUGGGHHH!!

Did that goon just pull a tampon out of Harley’s pocket?

I’M SORRY CAN WE TALK ABOUT THE PICTURE OF NUDE ELEANOR ROOSEVELT?

*gasps when Roman backhands Harley across the face*

OH HERE WE GO

HOLY SHIT THIS IS GREAT

ROMAN IN THE STRIPED SUIT

THE CHOREOGRAPHY

WHY WAS IT SO SHORT I LOVED IT

Where is this cover at on the official soundtrack?!?

“I’ll give you ‘til midnight.” Hold on, hold on, what’s the timeline for this movie?

Harley’s just booking it in the background

Aaaand we’re back at the beginning!

Aaand there’s Harley!

Wait there’s about an hour left and we just now got to Harley meeting Cass?

CONFETTIIIII!!

Is she just using paint bombs on all the guards?

Harley, trying to enter the cells: I AM PRESSING. EVERY BUTTON. I CAN FIND.

Why would they put Cass in the cell block with all the adults?

OH HALSEY! COME THROUGH!

*Harley slides across the floor to knock a guy down* OHHHH!!!

Daniel Pemberton’s orchestral score for this movie is reminding me an awful lot of “Into the Spiderverse”

Is that Katana’s sword?!? How the hell did it get there?!?

WAIT SHE’S GONNA HUFF THE COCAINE?!?

Jesus, now THIS is Harley’s fighting style! Holy crap!

*gasps when Harley gets kicked back and knocks off a car door off its hinges*

*jaw drops* SHE JUST SET THAT DUDE’S BEARD ON FIRE

How does everyone seem to know where Harley is?

*Smash cut to Harley buying laxative for Dinah in the store* Hahahahahaha!

“I do not care that you’re [Cass] a kid.” Yeah, Harley, didn’t you uh... assist in the murder of Jason Todd in this universe? Hmmm???

Wait so how long ago have Harley and the Joker been together?

Doc calls Harley “lotus flower”!

Those are the nuns from the school in the beginning!

She is actually... talking to the beaver

“[Joker] Sounds like a dick.” I mean, yeah.

Also I just realized that Harley drew an actual dick in the Joker drawing’s mouth

HUNTRESS!

OH NOW WE’RE GETTING INTRODUCED TO HELENA!

*eyes widen in shock at the Bertenelli massacre*

*chuckles at the smash cut to Helena practicing in the mirror*

*Roman sees someone laughing in the club* Oh no.

“Get on the table.” Uh.

Oh no what is he doing?

“DANCE, ERICA!” Ohh. Shit.

“Take your dress off.” *jaw drops in horror*

God, I cannot watch this. Holy-

*has to avert eyes*

*Roman stops Dinah from leaving* NO.

“You soothe me, little bird.” AHHHHHHHHHHHHH-

OK, I can take a breather now. Ohhhh my God...

They’re [Harley and Cass] really just having a girl’s night

BRUCE, NOOOOO!!!

“No one knew we were here except-” DOC SOLD THEM OUT!

“This next bit ain’t very pretty.” Oh boy.

“I [Roman] own this town. You have my protection.” Mmmmm... no?

Whoa this super dramatic cover of “Hit Me with Your Best Shot”

OH HE’S [Zsasz] GONNA SEE THE TEXT SHE [Dinah] SENT [to Montoya]!

*Roman starts to break down* Oh. Shit.

OH THIS MUSIC

*Roman puts the mask on* OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!

OH THIS IS GREAT

Also of course Joker and Harley had a hideout in Amusement Mile

*winces when Montoya punches Harley right in the boob*

*Harley kicks Montoya out the window* Oh she dead

*gasps* Zsasz!

Man that sideways shot of him is terrifying!

OH FRICK NO

JESUS I DON’T LIKE THIS

So is it implied that Zsasz only kills women or what? I thought he was an equal opportunity killer?

“That’s why he [Roman] needs me [Zsasz] to look after him.” Dude.

...did they just kill Zsasz?

Everyone except Harley is pointing guns at each other and all I’m thinking of is that scene from “The Office”

*snorts in hilarity for Harley clapping for Helena completing her kill list*

Oh Roman just brought a whole freaking army

OHHHH HE’S GOT THE MASK

Oh this music *chef’s kiss*

Oh my God is Roman gonna find Zsasz’s body?

Oh that crane shot out of the lair and back outside? That’s some good shit. Cathy Yan, I see you.

“I [Helena] DON’T HAVE RAGE ISSUES!” DINAH’S FACE!

*Helena pounces on a goon in the slide down and kills him* Geez that’s awesome

This whole set is great

*Helena gives Cass her old toy truck* THIS MAKES ME SAD

Yeah when did Harley have time to put on her skates?

Some dude just gets shanked then leaps back up

That fight scene just went by real quick

*gasps when Roman shoots Montoya*

*jaw drops when Dinah does the Canary Cry*

*Harley gets sideswiped by one of Roman’s goons* Yeah no there’s like half a rib cage gone

*Harley works on overtaking one of Roman’s goons’ car* CRAZY TOWN BEEP BEEP!

*Harley backflips onto the top of Roman’s car* OHHHH!

Founders Pier... geez that looks great

Wait are those all Roman’s goons just lining the dock or are those just statues?

Oh they’re all statues. That’s creepy.

“exCUUSEE me?!?” *snorts in hilarity*

*jaw drops when Cass tucks a grenade in Roman’s coat and activates it*

*still shocked when he FREAKING EXPLODES*

I’M SORRY THEY JUST KILLED OFF BLACK MASK

*Cass finally goes to the bathroom* Finally!

“Does she always [Montoya] talk like the cop in a bad 80s movie?” *laughs*

Guys Helena is great

*laughs when Helena laughs at the fact that Harley stole Dinah’s car*

“They call themselves the Birds of Prey.” Yay! Lemme see them again!

Harley’s jacket has a bedazzled vagina on the back of it

Look at Cass with her jacket and sunglasses!

“Yeah, I made the kid my apprentice.” Yeah, that’s not gonna last long.

#the blogger reacts #dceu #birds of prey #harley quinn #ewan mcgregor #black mask #roman sionis #dinah lance #black canary #huntress #helena bertinelli #cassandra cain #renee montoya #victor zsasz #joker #daniel pemberton #bop #rosie perez

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imnobodyuknow · 5 years ago

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So, as you may know (if you’re as big a nerd as me), the Vocaloids, created by Crypton Future Media, Inc., are the mascots for their Character Vocal Series -- a set of software products that let people craft songs out of artificial voices, which were made from real ones. As you may also know (again, if you’re a huge nerd), the four most famous ones are, in order of creation, Hatsune Miku, Kagamine Rin and Len, and Megurine Luka. Bear in mind that their names are Japanese, so their first names are Miku, Rin, Len, and Luka, respectively.

One thing I found intriguing about these characters is that, as human representations of voices, none of them have much of a backstory. Many of their fans have come up with different headcanons for them, but as far as I can tell, their creators didn’t have anything specific in mind, other than having them be dancers and singers. Naturally, this empty slate in their history made the right side of my brain react something like this:

So, if the Vocaloid family, as I like to call them, were real, flesh-and-blood performers, what would they be like? What would be their favorite leisure activities, foods, music (aside from J-pop, of course), places to be, etc? And most importantly, what sort of video games would they enjoy playing, if any? Rhythm-based games? Virtual reality games?

Actually, why not a game that combines the two? Something like...oh, I don’t know... Beat Saber?

If you’re unfamiliar with Beat Saber by Beat Games, I highly recommend checking it out. My sister and new brother-in-law introduced me to the unique experience of slicing blocks with twin lightsabers to the beat of a song, surrounded by an insanely ornate atmosphere, and it didn’t take me long to become an addict (and even slightly good at it)! And that was before I saw how good my sister was at it.

There’s a real art to getting the timing and position of your hands right in this game, and I have to say, she really astounded me. And this is coming from a guy who got a perfect on every game in Rhythm Heaven twice.

The house in this drawing was made to look like the apartment where they live , by the way. As you can see, Len’s putting every last bit of his effort into getting a huge combo...

...Rin’s feeling the same tension and excitement just from watching...

...Miku’s cheering him on like the huge optimist I imagine her to be...

...and Luka’s taking a break from reading her book to have a glance at it.

For whatever reason, I imagine Luka being a book-loving intellectual, similar to Yuri in DDLC. Her book happens to be one I’m currently reading: My Grandfather’s Son by Clarence Thomas. I’m not much of a reader, but I’ve found it to be intriguing on a number of levels.

You may notice (once again, if you’re a nerd) that none of them are wearing the headphones they’re usually seen with; now that they’re all off duty and enjoying games and pizza, those have been laid on the table behind them.

It’s nice to finally see what their ears look like, isn’t it?

And one final detail I decided to include -- part of the TV can be seen reflected in the mirror on the wall:

Speaking of minor details, as much as I love trying to get them right, this drawing made me realize just how much the Vocaloids’ outfits are just loaded with them! From the keyboard design stitched into the pleats of Miku’s skirt to the bizarre shapes of the golden parts of Luka’s outfit, to the tiny buttons and lights on the others’ outfits, I just about wore myself out trying to make them look accurate. : P You might also notice the tiny number tattoos on their arms, which signify the order in which they were created -- a pretty cute touch from the original artists, I thought.

One small inaccuracy is in the VR headset Len’s wearing -- in reality (heh), it has a part that goes over your head, but I decided to leave that out so Len’s signature hairdo could be seen -- hairstyle is practically what identifies any anime character, after all. We’ll just say he’s using a new model that comes out in whatever year this takes place in.

Anydangway, here’s the art I used as a reference for these adorable virtual pop idols:

Oh, yes -- and in case you’re wondering which song Len’s jamming away to...probably this one:

youtube

I swear, how feats like this are possible without divine intervention is beyond me.

#spongebob squarepants #patrick star #vocaloid #megurine luka #kagamine len #kagamine rin #hatsune miku #beat saber #pencil art #colored pencil art #poor rin's about to get smacked in the face X )

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lovelylogans · 6 years ago

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my eyes are wide to all your lies (’cause you’re not that discreet)

ao3 | read my other fics | coffee?

warnings: food mentions, mentions of getting rid/lessening anxiety, human experimentation (not as dark as it sounds, but still figured a warning would be good), fusion, deceit

pairings: royality

words: 6,269

notes: april fools, i got you! and now i present the idea that warranted my first block in four years of internet friendship and had me cackling in unholy, childish glee the whole time i was plotting and writing it: it’s a phineas and ferb au! yeah, you read that right. title from “busted” from phineas and ferb.

There was one hundred and four days of summer vacation before school came along just to end it.

So the annual problem that the Sanders-Prince brothers had was finding a new way to spend it. They’d built rockets, fought mummies, climbed up the Eiffel tower, discovered things that didn’t exist, given monkeys showers. They’d surfed tidal wives, created nanobots, located Frankenstein’s brain. They’d found a dodo bird, painted a continent, and driven their brother insane.

The question that was posed every day over toast-with-heaps-of-jam then had to be posed:

“Logan, what are we gonna do today?”

Logan Sanders nudged his glasses up his nose with a thoughtful expression. Logan had the expression of the teacher’s pet, the nerd that never got in trouble beyond perhaps reading during class, or correcting a teacher, but behind that calm, know-it-all expression and dorky glasses laid a mad scientist who had not yet graduated high school.

“We could recreate Tesla’s death ray again,” he suggested mildly.

“Logan, we did that three weeks ago.” Roman groaned. “No doing things again! It has to be bigger, better, bolder, newer.”

Roman Prince, on the other hand, had the exact look of a troublemaker that tended to have teachers hollering “Put that away!” and “Prince, principal’s office!” and got him parked in the front row of the room before he could scoot off to the back (usually next to his stepbrother, which compounded the problems, not that Logan would ever let himself get caught.) He gladly lived up to the reputation and strove for each spectacle to be bigger and grander than the last.

“Mom!” Virgil exclaimed, eyes huge, made to seem even wider by the dark eyeshadow smeared beneath them.

Their older brother (or stepbrother, to Roman) Virgil Sanders, had the exact face of a punk-rock emo kid, the sort of boy who skipped school and missed curfew and never cared. In actuality, he was kind of a tattletale, or perhaps more like the boy in back who muttered “I don’t know about this guys” while the other kids were doing things like experimenting with fireworks that they’d stolen from their older brother’s stash. Virgil’s ongoing pursuit of the summer was to catch Roman and Logan in the middle of one of their dangerous plots, which would surely end in their serious injuries and or deaths I know I look like the bad guy but you two have to be safe okay you could get seriously hurt or seriously DEAD do you understand me Roman and Logan D-E-A-D dead!

“That’s nice, dear,” Caroline Sanders-Prince said absently from where she was at the stove. Virgil groaned and put his head down on the table, floppy bangs narrowly missing the butter dish.

“Why do I even bother,” Virgil grumbled.

Roman batted his eyelashes at his stepbrother. “Because you love us?”

“Gross,” Logan muttered, from behind a thick tome entitled Understanding Chinese Engineering Doctoral Students in U.S. Institutions: A Personal Epistemology Perspective that he’d pulled from nowhere, because he was a boy genius who read books with very long titles like that. “Emotions.”

“Gross,” Virgil snapped. “Mom, Roman has the platypus on the table!”

“That’s nice, dear.”

“Aw, Deceit wouldn’t do anything, would he?” Roman crooned to their pet platypus, inexplicably named Deceit, who knickered at Virgil dutifully. Virgil pulled a face at him, because he did not trust that platypus.

“He just wants some bacon!” Roman exclaimed.

“Can platypuses have bacon?”

“Platypi,” the book corrected from where Logan’s face had been. “They’re technically carnivorous, so—yes. He’d probably prefer larvae or freshwater shrimp, though.”

“Gross,” Roman said, as he ensured Deceit had all the bacon he wanted and lowered him back onto the floor. “And so not the point! Logan! We have to figure out what to do today!”

The brothers continued to bicker, not noticing as Deceit the platypus crept outside, looked around, and pulled on his hat before entering into the secret chute that would catapult him to his day job: an animal agent for the OWCA, protecting the tri-state area from one inator-enamored mad scientist at a time.

“More Tesla?”

“Logan. We spent all of that week. On Tesla. We have to do something fresh! Something bold! Something we invent!”

“I still can’t believe you invented a death ray and you thought that was a good idea,” Virgil said, ready to work himself up into an anxiety-induced tizzy. “It’s a DEATH ray, death is right there in the name!”

Logan frowned at him over the pages of his book, which he was somehow halfway through already. “We wouldn’t have killed people,” he said. “Flies, probably. Or mosquitoes. Most likely.”

“Oh, that makes me feel so much better,” Virgil said. “Thanks, a death ray for flies or mosquitoes, most likely! What could have possibly gone wrong?!”

“How is it possible for you to worry so much?” Roman said, from where he was constructing an elaborate toast-tower with the remaining slices they hadn’t eaten, yet. He was currently sealing together the walls with jam and carefully carving out the windows for the tiny toast-people to survey their kitchen table kingdom. “I never worry so much.”

“Yeah, I worry enough for you, and Logan, and your little scout friend,” Virgil grumbled. “I have all the anxiety of this neighborhood combined into one person.”

Roman perked up, nearly sending a tiny toast-family sprawling. “Hang on, what did you just say?”

“Oh,” Virgil said, because he knew his stepbrother well enough to see his “new idea! new idea!” face, and he also knew him well enough to fear it. “Oh, no.”

“Oh, yes,” Roman said gleefully. “Logan! I know what we’re gonna do today!”

“Run me through it again.”

Roman sighed loudly from where he was stationed in a treetop, twisting a screw carefully into place. Half of Logan’s body was underneath their latest monstrous machine.

“Okay. So. The basic plan is, we’re going to see if we can put you in this machine to ease out some of your worries, your fears—enough so that it doesn’t overwhelm you constantly, not too much to change who you are as a person,” Roman began. “And if you hate it, we can reverse it, no problem.”

“When you say basic plan,” Virgil said apprehensively, and Logan rolled partially out from under the machine, lifting the welding mask off his face so that he could squint at Virgil, looking strange without his glasses.

“Without the scientific explanations that would inevitably confuse those of lesser intelligence.”

“Oh, thanks.”

“You know what he means,” Roman said, and then, “Oh, God, here he comes, quick, I—“

Roman made a half-aborted gesture as if to climb down the tree, and then hastily redirected his energy toward straightening his shirt, patting his hair into place, and setting up the most swaggeringly handsome pose he could manage in a tree. Virgil, looking down the street, tried his best to hide his smirk.

Patton Hart had lived down the street since they’d moved in after their parents got married, and his crush on Roman had ignited not long after the first box was taken off the truck. Patton Hart had the exact face that had teachers picking him for messenger duty, to guide a new kid around the school, or to provide a good face for the school—if he hadn’t volunteered for it already. He had quite the sprawl of extracurriculars under his belt, including, amongst others, Knitting Club, Baking Club, Pun Appreciation Club, and, most notably, leader of the Fireside Scouts—as noted by his constant orange sash that clashed horribly with his usual blue polo and gray hoodie.

The mutual crushes were a subject of constant private heckling between Logan and Virgil at Roman, and it would have been proven to further public mocking if Patton wasn’t so deeply, genuinely nice.

Patton bounced into the yard, beaming. “Hi, Virgil!”

“Hey, Patton,” Virgil said gruffly. (Patton had even charmed Virgil, a feat which back in the feuding-stepsibling days had stunned Roman to no end.)

“Hi, Roman,” he said, grinning up the tree at Roman, batting his eyelashes. “Whatcha dooo-in’?”

“Hey, Patton,” Roman said. “We’re trying to see if we can make Virgil less scared all the time without erasing who he is as a person.”

Patton flopped out on the sun-soaked grass that was trying valiantly to live in the drought of summer. “Sounds hard, but if anyone can do it, it’s you two. Hi, Logan,” he added to Logan’s knees.

Logan grunted and extended a hand out from under the machine. “Round-nose pliers.”

Patton cheerfully plucked the necessary tool from the expansive kit (tool-fetcher for the Sanders-Prince brothers was an unofficial but important extracurricular of his, one that he’d considered making a badge for) but held it in his hands, not yet handing it over. “What’s the magic word?”

“There’s no such thing as magic.”

“Logan.”

Logan let out a long-suffering sigh that he was probably extending, to compensate for the lack of eye contact, which meant no eyeroll. “Please pass the round-nose pliers.”

“Sure thing!” Patton said, carefully placing them in his hand, only to watch his arm disappear back under the machine.

Roman had managed to get down from the tree, and hastily straightened out his shirt before he leaned against the machine in a way that could not, in any universe, pass as casual. Virgil rolled his eyes and instead resorted to picking at the latest rip in his jeans rather than focus on any of the big and admittedly very scary-looking machine that would somehow help his anxiety.

Shouldn’t it be, like, painted with sunshine and daisies or something, not just some kind of metallic alloy? If it was about taking away fear?

“I’m telling Mom,” Virgil said, mostly out of routine at this point.

“Aren’t you involved today?” Roman said. “And therefore, you’d get in trouble too, so—”

“It’s not about trouble,” Virgil said irritably. “It’s about—it’s about danger. You can’t just keep ramping up experiments without safety measures and without making detailed plans or prototypes or something that you run through any potential side effects or faults that would happen, you could get hurt badly, you could hurt someone else, you could—”

Logan had wheeled himself out from under the machine, removing the mask, and his stare was so knowing that Virgil clamped his mouth shut, looking at a patch of brown grass that wasn’t quite in the reach of the sprinkler.

“We aren’t Dad, Virgil.”

Logan’s voice was pitched low, almost kind, and Virgil screwed his eyes shut.

“Hey,” Roman said, blessedly oblivious as always, “where’s Deceit?”

Deceit was currently parachuting his way onto the balcony of his nemesis’ secret evil lair/tower. As a platypus without opposable thumbs, this was more difficult than most would think.

Especially when a platypus without opposable thumbs was dodging a series of dodgy traps, only to stumble into a table where his nemesis had set up tea.

“Oh. Deceit the platypus, there you are,” Dr. Doofenshmirtz said. “You’re late, and as such, I have revoked your access to cucumber sandwiches!”

Deceit stared at him blankly.

“Oh, I just can’t resist that face,” Dr. Doofenshmirtz said. “Fine, catch!”

Dr. Doofenshmirtz hurled a cucumber sandwich directly at Deceit’s beak like the world’s tiniest, most confusing projectile, which hit his beak, and then expanded outward into a series of wires and cables, snaring Deceit against the wall.

“And now that you are trapped, I shall explain my evil plan!” He said gleefully.

Deceit let out the platypus equivalent of a sigh, tipping his head back to the ceiling.

“Okay, that should be the last of it,” Roman said, stepping back and wiping his brow free of sweat. Virgil, who had long since retreated to the shade of underneath a tree, grimaced at the machine, and began picking at his freshly-painted black fingernails with a renewed sense of fervor. There were already tiny chips of black littered around him in the dirt.

Patton proffered a little tray of lemonade, and Roman perked up.

“Oh, hey, thanks, Patton!” He said happily, picking up the ice-cold glass and pressing it against his forehead for a moment, before taking a healthy gulp from the red-and-white striped straw.

“Logan, Virgil?” Patton offered, lifting the tray. “I have cookies too.”

There was a brief break as everything went snack-crazed for a bit, the boys bumping into each other and elbowing each other aside as they took their cookies of preference.

“So,” Patton said, taking his own sip of his lemonade (blue-and-white striped straw) “Virgil goes in there, you press that switch, and he’ll just... he’ll be less worried about things?”

“Well—” Logan began, but Roman broke in, smiling winningly at Patton.

“Essentially, yep!”

“Well,” Logan repeated, “Actually, Patton, I was surveying the mechanics, and it could potentially be aided if someone who produced... less worry and had a... how should we say, sunnier outlook on life stepped into the machine, too.”

Patton blinked at him, and Virgil was already surging toward the machine, spreading his arms, as if to bar anyone from approaching it.

“No. No way,” Virgil declared immediately. “It’s bad enough that you looped me into this plan, but there’s no way that you’re bringing Patton into it too!”

“Patton joins our plans daily,” Roman pointed out. “Honestly, it’s really more of a shock that you joined in, Fret-a-lot-saw.”

Virgil squinted at him. “Are you calling me a tool?”

“Shucks, kiddo, if it’ll help, I’m helping,” Patton said, setting aside his lemonade.

Virgil was already shaking his head again, eyes wild, like a spooked horse.

“Why did I even let you get this far?” He asked himself. “Forget it! I’m going to tell Mom, and she’ll—”

“—say that’s nice dear without looking up from whatever else is taking her attention?” Logan asked archly.

“Fine,” Virgil said, undeterred. “Roman’s Dad, then.”

“It’s baseball season, no chance,” Roman said with a shrug.

“The police, then! The FBI! Anything!” Virgil said. “You two need a wake-up call, okay?! And apparently I’m the only one who’s gonna give it to you!”

“This is why you need the machine,” Roman said, and spread his hands. “Look around! You are literally the only one who is so freaked out about this.”

“Because no one else has common sense!”

“Because everyone else knows we can do it and doesn’t treat us like we can’t!” Roman snapped, and immediately shut his mouth, going bright red. “Um, I mean—I mean, obviously, more like haha, of course we can do it! Because we’re so smart and handsome and—”

Virgil hesitated, and lowered his arms to cross them over his chest. “I didn’t say you couldn’t do it,” he admitted grudgingly.

“Yeah, well, you act like anything we make will inevitably blow up a lot more than someone who thinks we can,” Roman grumbled, scuffing a sneaker over the grass.

“Because that happens, Roman! Even to really, really experienced inventors. Besides, aren’t you a little young to be making crazy inventions in the backyard every day?”

“Yes,” Roman said, jutting his chin up proudly. “Yes I am.”

Logan sighed. “We’ve run tests, we’ve made prototypes, will you please just step into the machine? This whole—” Logan gestured broadly with his hand, nose wrinkling, “emotional outburst thing is part of the whole reason we made it.”

Virgil hesitated even more.

“It can’t hurt to just try, can it?” Patton said, and proffered his hand. “Look, I’ll step in with you. It looks kinda scary.”

Virgil hesitated, licked his lips, and said, “You’re sure about this?”

“Positive,” Logan said, shoving Patton toward him, and hissing in his ear, “Quick, before he changes his mind.”

Patton shot him a fondly exasperated look, before taking Virgil’s hand. Roman glowered at their joined hands for a moment.

Virgil let out a slow breath, and his knuckles went white from how tightly he was squeezing Patton’s hand. “Fine. Let’s get this over with.”

“On it,” Patton said, and ducked through first, Virgil shooting a last look that seemed to say help to Logan, before following.

“All right!” Roman whooped, racing over to the machine. “Okay, power on, levels stable... you two ready?”

“I guess,” Virgil grumbled, as Patton chirped, “Yep!”

“Less worry, here we come!” Roman trilled, and flipped the switch.

A veritable lightshow ensued and the machine flared, and smoked, and sparked, as Roman and Logan hastily stepped back.

Roman leaned into his ear, shouting to be heard over the machine. “We are sure about this, right?”

“About 85% sure, yes. Perhaps 80%. 65% sure, at lowest. Probably.”

“Good enough for me,” Roman said, and returned his gaze to the machine just in time for the light and noise to die down.

“All right, Virgil, how are we feeling?” Roman called out. “Less inclined to bust us all the time? Maybe relaxed enough to, like, let us keep experimenting with death rays?”

There was no response.

Roman and Logan both frowned.

“Patton?” Roman called, a little more desperate. “Hey, sweet-Hart, you okay in there?”

“Um,” a voice floated out from the machine that neither of them had ever heard before, and yet was inherently familiar, “you guys?”

Deceit tuned back in, perfectly timed to excise the Tragic Backstory but to get the full effect of the eventual evil plan of the day.

It had taken years of practice.

“—to make everyone as fearful as I was that day in the checkout line!”

Deceit stared at the massive device cloaked by a sheet.

“Yes, that’s right, Deceit the platypus,” he said gleefully, and whipped off the sheet. “Behold! The Frighteninator!”

Deceit began to work against the bonds, wondering idly if he would break his record of forty-one seconds—very impressive, for a platypus without opposable thumbs, if you asked him.

“Yes, soon the whole tri-state area shall tremble in fear, and therefore, I will be able to easily subjugate them and become emperor of the tri-state area!”

Roman was still waving the smoke out of his face when a silhouette stepped free from the machine, seeming close to stumbling before holding out its arms to keep its balance.

Well. That wasn’t right.

“What,” the voice asked, in that same foreign-familiar tone, “just happened?”

“Oh, excellent,” Logan said, peering closer at the silhouette.

“No, not excellent!” The silhouette wailed and at last the smoke cleared, revealing—

Well, at first Roman wasn’t really sure.

It looked sort of like a person, if not for the extra set of arms protruding at the waist. Their eyes had a huge pair of round glasses set in front of it, but the bags underneath them were pronounced and darker than Roman had ever seen on an actual person. Their polo was stitched in an odd amalgamation of blue, gray, purple, and black, mixing plaid with solid color, and there was an odd sash that—

Oh.

Oh, wow.

“I dunno,” the stranger said cheerfully, “I think it’s kinda neat! Imagine all the cool stuff we can do with four arms!”

“Virgil?” Logan said, at the same time Roman said, “Patton?”

“Yes,” the voice answered—and that was why it sounded so strange, so familiar—

It was both of their voices at once.

“You,” the creature glowered. “are gonna get so—!”

“—famous, from all that nifty inventing you guys do!” the creature finished.

No, not a creature. It was Virgil and Patton. Patton and Virgil? Patton-and-Virgil, Virgil-and-Patton? God, his stepbrother had fused with his crush, he was so used to weird days (most of them he was responsible for) but this was so weird.

“You’ve fused!” Logan said gleefully.

“This was not in your plan!” Virgil—or at least, the part of him that was Virgil—cried out.

“Well, we thought it might be a side effect,” Roman admitted. “But hey! Take a few steps, swing your arms around, tell us how you feel, this was definitely on the to-do list, and now I don’t have to deal with any of Logan’s nerdiness infecting me.”

Logan threw a wrench at him half-heartedly and Roman ducked—a well-practiced maneuver.

“Why’ve I got four arms?” the creature said, taking a hobbling step forward, flexing its two right hands. “I mean, all the more stuff I could do with it, probably—Virgil, you’re left-handed, aren’t you?”

The two left arms stretched, almost sulkily. Roman hadn’t known that an arm could stretch sulkily, but leave it to Virgil.

“Fascinating,” Logan breathed, digging hastily and coming up with a legal pad and a pen. “How do you feel? Do you still feel essentially separate, or do you find yourself more as a cohesive, singular unit?”

“I,” the creature said, and then it frowned. “I dunno, I guess? I’m—we’re?—feeling a bit more like one unit the longer we stick together, I think. We think?”

“Singular pronouns, I think,” Logan said, taking notes hastily. “Male ones. As to the four arms question—”

“Forget that,” Roman said. “What do we even call you?”

“Hm,” The creature said, one of its right hands coming up to frame under its chin. “I dunno. Pattil? Virgin?”

Roman snorted a laugh, and the creature slanted a look at him that was distinctly Patton.

“Why’s that funny?”

“It—uh—it isn’t,” Roman admitted sheepishly. “Sorry. Um... how about Moxie? Like, you got moxie, kid, Moxie.”

“Moxie,” they—he—said. “Okay! Sure, sounds cool.”

“How’s it going, though?” Roman said. “Less worried? More worried? Still freaking out about having double the amount of arms as usual?”

Moxie frowned for a second, and then his eyes went far away.

“Oh,” he said, tone equally far away, splitting into two—distinctly Virgil and Patton speaking in unison. “Oh. I can feel what you’re feeling.”

“Is that... good?” Roman asked, but then Moxie wrapped all four arms around himself, as if giving himself a hug.

“Do I want a cookie?” Moxie mumbled to himself, and snorted as if he had made a joke.

“Perhaps that would be good, I’d imagine transfusing into a new form would burn calories,” Logan said. “Plus, I’d like to see your finer motor control.”

Roman picked up the tray, offering it, and Moxie took a few shambling steps closer, eyes squinted in focus, a set of arms spread to keep his balance.

“Hmm,” Moxie said, and then the right hand lunged forward, nearly knocking the tray over, before squeaking, “Sorry!”

“That’s okay,” Roman said. “New body. Also, can I tell you how weird it is that my friend and my stepbrother are combined into one person now?”

“It’s feeling less and less weird,” Moxie mused, before more carefully reaching and taking a cookie. “Thanks.”

Roman smiled at Moxie. Inexplicably, Moxie blushed, and then Moxie scowled, and then Moxie shoved the cookie into his mouth whole.

“Was that on purpose?” Logan asked mildly, who had not stopped scribbling.

“Mmmhmmm,” he said, trying his hardest not to spew crumbs. “Hungfwy.”

Logan nodded, marking something specifically. “Patton, what did you eat for breakfast? I’m curious as to how many calories this burns.”

“He didn’t,” Moxie blurted out, and then a right hand clapped over his mouth.

“Patton-cakes!” Roman scolded. “For all the times you talk to me about balanced eating!”

“That would explain it,” Logan said. “Take another cookie. Left hand, this time.”

Moxie reached forward with his left hand, taking another cookie, not even knocking over the tray this time.

“Oh, yeah,” Moxie added, “I feel less worried, but I... feel. A lot. So.”

He took another big bite of a cookie.

“So,” Roman said. “Um. Now that we have a fusion machine... what now?”

Roman and Logan exchanged a grin, and Moxie looked nervous for a second, before he grinned, too.

“—what?! Deceit the platypus?!?! How could you have possibly freed yourself from that cucumber sandwich?!”

Deceit held up his OWCA-issue pocketknife in answer.

“Curse you, Deceit the platypus!”

Deceit leapt, and smacked Dr. Doofenshmirtz across the face with his beaver tail.

Virgil had gone inside with the excuse of fixing Patton a plate of some leftover breakfast, but also mostly to avoid the light-and-smokeshow of the machine as Roman and Patton sequestered themselves in the machine.

It hadn’t quite died down by the time Virgil came out, awkwardly holding a plate.

“So,” Logan said, making a table on the notepad, “how long into the fusion do you think it’ll be before one of them gives themself away?”

Virgil snorted. “Five seconds.”

Logan sighed in relief. “I’ve been very tired of hearing about how Patton’s hair shines in the sun. Or about how his eyes sparkle when he laughs. Or—”

Virgil laughed. “That bad?”

“You don’t share a room with him,” Logan said darkly.

“Yeah, well, you didn’t get randomly hit with butterflies because Roman smiled at you while you were fused with Patton. Let me tell you, that felt very gross.”

Logan tilted his head. “Point,” he said, and stole a triangle of toast already spread with jelly.

“Aftereffects of the fusion?” He said, before jamming the toast triangle into his mouth whole and readying his pen.

Virgil paused, analyzing that, and said, “...weirdly calm.”

Logan nodded, writing this down, and at last the machine died down.

“Okay, Roman, Patton, how are you doing?” Virgil called out. “I’ve got breakfast for you here, if you want it.”

There’s a pause, and then, “I think we want to be Paman?”

“Paman,” Virgil amended, and the fusion stumbled out. He looked almost normal, really—blue and white and red seemed like a much more fitting combination, though the orange sash really was quite hideous, still—except for the four pairs of eyes, the bottom, normally-placed set wearing glasses, the top set clearly Roman’s.

“Ooh, jelly,” Paman said happily, and lumbered toward Virgil, taking the plate with a sunny smile that was obviously Patton. “Thanks!”

He flopped out on the grass, and tucked tidily into his breakfast, eating neatly and swiftly. Virgil and Logan sat, both staring at Paman—Paman seemed to stare back, even as he kept one set of eyes on the breakfast he was eating.

“I love jelly,” Paman said, and then,

“I know,” Paman said, “You always—“

A pause. Paman’s cheeks went a bright shade of red, and they put down the toast. Virgil offered a fist, and Logan reached out and tapped it with his own (a gesture that had taken some explanation for Logan to do on command, now.)

“You really...?”

“Is... are you...?”

Paman trailed off, smiled to himself, and went back to his breakfast, still blushing.

Crack! Pow! Bam!

“Not the nose, not the nose!” Dr. Doofenshmirtz wailed.

Paman was absently holding hands with himself when Logan finished his questionnaire, and nodded, flipping through the legal pad, which he’d mostly filled.

“I suppose the next question is, does a fusion more or less maintain its stability when another person is introduced to the fusion?”

Paman blinked. “You can add more than two people to a fusion?” He asked, and he answered himself in his next breath: “A fusion’s made up of all its parts—it can be anyone, as long as they’re comfortable with each other.” Paman then nodded, as if this made sense to him, and looked at Logan.

“Aren’t you curious?” He said, in his more unified voice, and Logan’s eyes gleamed for a moment, before—

“I suppose,” he said, attempting at casual.

“You sure about this?” Virgil asked.

Paman and Logan spoke as one: “Positive.”

Virgil sighed, but got to his feet. “Guess I’ll flip the switch, then.”

Slam! Pow! Ka-CLANK!

“NOT THE FRIGHTENINATOR!”

“Weird, right?” Virgil said, leaning against the machine, as the unnamed fusion (two sets of arms, two sets of eyes) staggered from the machine.

“Fascinating,” he said. “It seems that adding a person aggregates the unusual physical additions—Virgil, hand me my notepad!”

Virgil rolled his eyes, but fetched it for him, handing it to the left set of arms, which immediately uncapped the pen and began to scrawl.

“Will you two keep your emotions away from me,” the fusion complained, and in the next breath he snickered, “Sorry!”

The fusion scrawled away at length, before he offered a professional nod, and one of his hands.

“All four of us,” he said, and Virgil hesitated.

“It’ll be fine,” he promised, and Virgil sighed, before accepting the hand, and walking back into the machine.

With one last well-placed kick, Dr. Doofenshmirtz went down and stayed down. Deceit, after waiting a few moments, rushed over to the Frighteninator, intent on shutting it down, tiny platypus paws roaming the machine, before—

Deceit let out a knicker that would have had his platypus mother scrubbing out his bill with platypus soap.

He walked out, spreading his arms—one set. And one set of eyes.

“We must look like a normal person,” he said.

He wasn’t sure where the thought originated, and if he focused, he could sense the divide—Logan’s intense curiosity, Roman’s inherent passion, Patton’s ambitions of kindness, Virgil’s worry—but he was...

He was...

He reached in his pocket and dug out a phone, turning it to the front-facing camera to squint at himself.

The outfit had actually normalized into something a normal person would wear—a red shirt, a tan jacket, jeans. His face was...

He squinted at himself. He looked so much like—

my eyes—

—my nose—

—my ears—

—my cheekbones—

—and yet so utterly, completely himself. He was... he was....

The name came from somewhere deep inside of him.

“Thomas.”

He lowered the phone, and took a shaky, wobbling step forward, almost like a baby deer, arms pinwheeling to keep his balance. Then another, and another. They got easier all the time.

It’s like we’re a whole new person, one of them, or maybe all of them, marveled, it’s like we’re a real, actual person.

But he was missing something. He was missing...

Oh, but he was so here now, all together now, even if it was imperfect it was wonderful. The laugh that bubbled up from inside him was truly, wholly felt, until—

What’s that, a thought, sharp, that could only be Virgil, and he looked up in time to see the arc of green light split and head for him and for the machine.

“Uh-oh.”

There was no time for this newly-formed body to hurl itself aside, and so the green light caught him full in the chest, and he doubled over, hitting his knees.

What’s happening, what’s happening—

—green light, could have been gamma-based—

—it’s hurting him, it’s hurting usme, we have to—

—knew something bad would happen knew it knew it knew it knew it—

Distantly, an explosion could be heard—but he was on his hands and knees, vision narrowing in, and he tried to suck in a breath. He can hardly breathe. There’s something pounding in him, deep and strong, overwhelming all his other senses, and his vision doubles, and—

whatshappeningwhatshappeningwhatshappening

—their vision goes black around the edges, and the green-brown grass looms large in his vision, and what’s that noise, what’s that noise—

—heart rate increase, sweat increase, this is epinepherine, this is fear, as if you don’t know anything about it shut up shut up shut up they’ll hear they’ll—

There’s the scent of burning, but it’s so far away that he can’t focus on that right now, and their body feels like it’s splitting, like it’s—

—hurts why does it hurt I don’t want to hurt I want my friends I want to go don’t hurt my friends don’t hurt my friends don’t hurt my—

—but he feels molten, like lava, like he’s about to melt and spill everywhere, and he can’t hold, but he needs to hold, he needs—

—no, no, don’t do this to them, they’re just kids, I can take it, let me take it, I have to take it, I have to be the one who takes it, don’t do this to them, dontdontDON’T—

He tears down the middle, and there’s a pain for a moment, so sharp and unbearable that none of them can breathe, and—

Patton blinked up at the sky. For a moment, silence—streaky white clouds on the edges of the horizon not daring to intrude on the clear blue of the sky; a bird soared directly overhead as if to flout the clouds’ cowardice.

The silence broke with a horrible, rasping breath, and Patton pushed himself up onto his side to see Virgil, rolling onto his side, coated in a green glow. Patton hastened toward him, heart in his throat.

“Virgil—”

“Don’t touch him,” Logan said, already at his other side. “We don’t know if the gamma ray will spread back to us if we touch him—”

Patton’s eyes stung, and he swiped at them in irritation—he hated that he cried when he got frustrated, or angry, or scared. “Can’t we do something?!”

“M’fine,” Virgil choked out, eyes screwed shut. “M’fine, it’s getting better already—”

“Virgil, don’t you dare lie,” Roman said, pale and ashen and—and how is Patton almost fluttery at a time like this, can’t his emotions settle instead of seesawing wildly inappropriately from one end of the spectrum from another?!

Virgil took in a purposefully deep breath, let it out, and offered a weak, crooked smile to them. “I’m fine, see? I’m fine.”

The green glow had lessened, at least. He now just looked like he was bathed in the light of a green spotlight, instead of encased in some green, glowing Jell-O. He pushed himself up onto the elbows, and drew a hand over his eyes, before he squinted.

“Okay, how the fu—I mean heck—do you guys do that everyday?”

“Do what?” Roman said cluelessly, and Patton’s eyes are drawn toward the fusion machine. Or, where the fusion machine was. Now there was just black soot.

Roman shrugged. “Deus ex machina?”

Logan let out a regretful sigh. “Well, at least I have my notes,” he said thoughtfully. “And the blueprints.”

“Boys, I’m home!”

“Hi, Mom,” Roman, Virgil, and Logan called without looking up, Virgil getting a bit more color in his face by the second, green fading and fading until it was just about gone.

“Patton, I’m really okay,” he said, and Patton let out a shaky breath, remembering Moxie, remembering all the fear and worry he felt, but all the care, too—the soft side that he kept almost hidden.

“You better be, mister,” he said. “Or I’ll—I’ll steal all your cookies!”

Virgil’s lips twitched. He looked like a normal person now. “All of them, huh?”

“All of them,” Patton said, nodding judiciously. “For the rest of your life.”

“Sounds serious,” he said, well, seriously.

Logan nudged his glasses up his nose, clearing his throat. “Any lingering effects?”

Virgil held up a shaking hand in answer.

“Let’s get you inside,” Logan said. “And horizontal.”

“Probably a good idea,” Virgil said, and all three of them hastened to help him up—Logan and Virgil grabbing his hands, Roman pushing his back—and Virgil slung an arm around Logan’s shoulders.

“Help me in, would you?” He said loudly, and proceeded to “accidentally” kick Roman in the shin.

“Hey!” Roman said, but his response died when Virgil jerked his head.

And Patton and Roman were left alone in the backyard.

Patton scuffed his shoe over the yard. “That was pretty crazy, today,” he offered timidly.

Roman smiled at him and shoved a hand through his hair—Patton felt his cheeks going red, reminded at this, the most inopportune moment, that Roman knew how attractive he found that, now.

“Good crazy?”

Patton felt his face split into a grin. “You kidding?” He declared. “That was awesome! Well, until the random gamma ray of despair, I guess. But other than that!”

Roman laughed, too, and he said, “He’ll be okay. Gamma rays like that tend to be really temporary.”

Patton sucked in a breath, looked into the living room window, where he could see Logan already pestering Virgil, waving around his notepad before beginning to scrawl with a single-minded fervor. He smiled again.

“I trust you,” he said.

“Yeah, I know,” Roman said, soft, and Patton inched closer.

“So,” Roman said. “Seeing jelly all over your face was what really sold you on me, huh?”

Patton smiled wider. “I think it was a cute look. But I think all of your looks are cute, so, you know.”

Roman smiled, and he offered, “So, um. Do you wanna... do you wanna get ice cream sometime?”

“I’d love that,” Patton said. His cheeks hurt from smiling so big.

“Because you don’t have to you if you don’t want to,” Roman added hastily. “I mean, I get it if you don’t—”

Patton put a finger on Roman’s lip, remembering too much of Paman’s self-criticism, his loneliness, his doubt.

“Roman,” he said. “Dearest. I’d. Love. That.”

Roman’s face broke out into his own relieved smile. Patton hoped he was remembering Paman, too—the butterflies in his stomach, the way he’d felt when Roman had smiled at Moxie, when their hands had first brushed together.

“Pick you up at seven tomorrow?” Patton offered.

“Yeah,” Roman said breathlessly, and he cleared his throat. “Um, yeah. Okay.”

Patton beamed, and leaned forward to press a kiss against Roman’s cheek, watching in delight as Roman’s face went red, too. Patton took his hand.

“C’mon,” he said. “We gotta go make sure Virgil feels better by giving him lots of hugs and sugar.”

“Okay,” Roman repeated, and Patton tugged him inside, where Virgil and Logan were already bickering, and curled up in a corner was—

“Oh! There you are, Deceit!”

#my post #text #my fic #april fools i got you so good!#it's a phineas and ferb au!#logan #patton #virgil #thomas #roman #deceit

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grimelords · 6 years ago

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Two days after I said I’d upload it tonight, here it is! My October playlist is finished and it’s chock a block full of good music and also bad music that I love. From John Mellencamp to drone metal, from Katy B to Cassius, it’s all here and more. Deadmau5 also is here and for that I apologise.

Small Town (Acoustic) - John Mellencamp: Guess who had a legit emotional reaction to a John Mellencamp song this month, thinking deeply about what it means to be from a small town and how much this song gets right and wrong about identity and freedom in a small town versus living in a big town? This guy. I think this song works a lot better stripped down acoustically than it does in the album version. It gives the lyrics a lot more space, and really lays out just how simple the sentiment of the song is. It sets the tone of this month's playlist pretty well now that I think about it. I've been feeling like a real pea-brain hayseed this month and big chunks of this playlist really reflect that.

Katy On A Mission - Katy B: It feels like this and Hold It Against Me by Britney Spears (which was also 2011) is the moment that big american style dubstep completely crossed over into the mainstream, Scary Monsters And Nice Sprites was about six months ago and from there it was a tidal wave until oversaturation and complete death. But Katy On A Mission is different because it's at least got the credentials of dubstep pioneer Benga producing it and it doesn't go all-out on the super dirty bass, or even particularly have a big drop at all - it just uses it textually all the way through and it's better off for it.

I Only Have Eyes For You - The Flamingos: The way this song is recorded is insane. It literally sounds like they're at the bottom of a well. And it's mixed in that good early stereo hard-panned style so the lead is in the right channel and the whole harmony is in the left channel and absolutely soaked in reverb in a way that just sounds incongruous with the rest of the song. It sounds like a dream. My favourite moment is at about 2:30 when the harmony vocals get so large on the high note that they clip out and distort in a way that just sounds very, very cool.

Horses In The Sky (Live Version) - The Sound Of Animals Fighting: The Sound Of Animals Fighting was a post-hardcore prog supergroup where they were all anonymous (it was just the entirety of RX Bandits plus Anthony Green from Circa Survive) and I really wish they'd done more like this after their first album - because they still wrote very very good songs but they got lost in the mire of studio ambient interludes and being avant-garde for the sake of it which sometimes worked and most times just bored you which thankfully they only succumb in the end section of this version. Compare this to the studio version if you want to know what I mean, halfway through the guitar solo it just starts playing in reverse.

Split Wide Open - Cannibal Corpse: Here's what I mean about feeling like a pea-brain this month. Cannibal Corpse is proper troglodyte moron man music. It makes me feel dumb as fuck like a real stupid guy. There's something interesting about Cannibal Corpse's enduring ability to shock people, and that a band making such extreme music are at least a name that people know. They were in Ace Ventura: Pet Detective for god's sake. Before Marilyn Manson and that wave of cabaret shock-rock really got into the popular consciousness Cannibal Corpse were making shocking, violent music without any of the glamour and I think it's served them well in the long run. Songs like 'Hammer Smashed Face' or 'I Cum Blood', are shocking in title, artwork and content to this day are still musically shocking to the vast majority, far more than Marilyn Manson's spooky androgyny and wearing like a top hat and having fangs or whatever that's aged like milk and become just another boring cliche. The idea of the devil being charming and sly, disguised in charisma is so much more boring than the devil just tearing you apart like mince meat and eating you. Anyway I'm here to say Cannibal Corpse is good music for dum-dums like me.

Funeraloplis - Electric Wizard: Someone's edited it now but it's still in the footnote links, but the best ever piece of writing on wikipedia was the quote on Electric Wizard's page where they were explaining the origin of their name because it said "Is the name Electric Wizard made out of two Black Sabbath song titles? [smokes a big bud of weed through a can] Hahahaha, yeah it is!" which is so good and sort of all you need to know about them.

I <3 U So - Cassius: Looking back through this list it seems I'm having a real 2011 moment for some reason. I don't think I *get* Cassius. From everything I read about them they seem to be french dance royalty but they literally have two good songs and they're both in this playlist. These two songs are very good though so maybe it's just that. Anyway it's a shame what Kanye did this to song on Watch The Throne but I don't blame him, it feels like this song is just impossible to work with. It's at a weird tempo, it's incredible loose, it basically has one section. I imagine this song would have frustrated a lot of DJs when it was popular cause I really don't know how you would mix in or out of it, but fuck it while it's on it's a great song!

Youth, Speed, Trouble, Cigarettes - Cassius: This is the other good Cassius song. I'm pitching it as the theme song for when they eventually reboot Skins. I really appreciate that this song has 1 idea and basically just does every variation it can with it before bringing it to a climax. When your idea is this simple and this good that's all you need. Also the big toms that kick in after the 'just one more' but are heaven sent.

It Took The Night To Believe - Sun 0))): Sun 0))) are such morons and it's so funny that you can be so dumb and so serious about this sort of music at the same time. On this song Greg Anderson is credited as Mystik Fogg Invokator and Stephen O'Malely is credited as Taoiseach, which is the name for the Irish prime minister. Whenever I listen to Sun 0))) for the first two minutes I'm like 'lol this sucks' but then suddenly the guy is like 'cry yourself to ash' and I'm feeling the pull of the void quite heavily. Basically it's just like that meme.

Seven Angels - Earth: I remember ages ago some guy posted Earth 2: Special High Frequency edition and it was just this whole album with a high pass filter on it which is a funny joke. Anyway it interesting to think of this album in the context of when it came out. Two years after Nevermind, six months before In Utero - grunge at the absolute height of its power, stoner metal like Kyuss and Sleep huge when suddenly this guy comes out of nowhere and distills guitar music down to its essence: slower, louder, heavier than anything else by an order of magnitude.

Mutual Slump - DJ Shadow: I finally saw Xanadu this month and now I can finally relate to the weird smiling breathing out your nose noise that she makes after she says 'I'd never hailed a cab before' in this song.

Walkin' On The Sidewalks - Queens Of The Stone Age: Queens Of The Stone Age's first album is 20 years old this year and I've been thinking a lot about how it was a two person operation. Josh Homme played and sang everything on this album except the drums and it's funny to think about writing this sort of music all by yourself outside of a jam structure. He really sat down with a pad and paper and wrote down 'outro: bass riff x400' and then recorded it just like that.

Witch - Maps & Atlases: I wake up with this song in my head so often it's insane. I think a triplet groove in 4/4 like this is such a good and underused feeling and this song really deploys is perfectly. I want more of this, the good kind of math rock where it's not just guys doing midwest emo tappy riffs that all sound the same.

Down 2 Hang - Kirin J Callinan: This is what meeting up with people from the internet feels like. It's kind of a shame that this album got completely overshadowed by the Jimmy Barnes screaming meme, and that it's the first and last a lot of americans will ever hear of Jimmy Barnes but in reality it's exactly what Kirin J Callinan wanted to good for him I suppose.

Fast In My Car - Paramore: If you can't tell already I'm having an extremely basic bitch moron man month and that included listening to this Paramore album a lot and telling my girlfriend about how isn't it so interesting that the guitarist Taylor York just took over drum duties for this album after their longtime drummer quit and did such a good job playing drums AND guitar and her rightly not caring at all. I'm always impressed by songs that keep the same chords through the verse and chorus, it seems impossible but it works great here.

Don't Stop The Dance (feat. Delafleur) - Breakbot: I'm clapping my hands to stress each syllable when I tell you that Disco Will Never Die.

Oqiton - Jeremy Dutcher: I'm so glad this album won the Polaris Prize because I feel like I would never have heard of it otherwise. I absolutely love it, and I think what I love so much about it is that it doesn't fall into the trap of similar projects like this in the past of smoothing out all the jagged edges and turning it into plastic pretty music from the untouched ancient peoples - it's a real and alive reinterpretation of old music that looks toward the future and past in equal measure. Including the actual original recordings in each track is such a smart move, it gives you the context you need so this album isn't about liner notes and extra sources and it lets those old recordings seamlessly fold into these new reorchestrations.

I Remember - Deadmau5 & Kaskade: Anyway moron month continues here with the only worthwhile contribution to the planet earth that Deadmau5 ever made, I suspect by letting Kaskade do most of the work. It sounds sadistic but I really appreciate how this song is nearly ten minutes long, I'm a big fan of any song with that much confidence that actually pulls it off.

Overtime - Jessie Ware: Fucking Jessie Ware is back and she’s got Bicep producing! I think I added this song to my playlist before it was even a minute in, I just heard the bassline and my brain stem said yes.

Body - Julie Jacklin: I really think Julia Jacklin might be the best songwriter around right now and I cannot wait for her new album. I guess this keeps with the moron man theme by telling it from the other side. I keep listening to this song and then getting into a real mood for about an hour afterwards so I can't imagine the damage the album is going to do to me.

Can't Tell Me Nothing - Kanye West: Throughout the whole ongoing Kanye drama I've been thinking of this song. " I feel the pressure, under more scrutiny, and what I do? Act more stupidly" "I'm on TV talking like it's just you and me". Anyway he's had is money right for a long time but it's becoming increasingly apparent that you really really can't tell him nothing. I think it's interesting that the thing that seems to have spurred him into clarifying his beliefs and finally backtracking on anything is that Candace Owens tried to credit him for the shitty Blexit thing and it turns out the one thing you can't do to Kanye West is manipulate him into putting his name on something he doesn't believe in or didn't create. It's insane that John Legend and Mos Def and Talib Kweli reaching out didn't change anything but Candace Owens taking one too many liberties absolutely did.

Like Wolves On The Fold - Colin Stetson: I've said it one million times but I love Colin Stetson. I love how straightforward this is for a Colin Stetson song. You can sing along to it! So much writing about him focuses on the intricasies of his technique rather than his resulting very human, very primal music. I feel like his music is not very far from beating on your chest and yelling a lot of the time (especially toward the second half of this song) and the saxophone element just makes it a lot more socially acceptable.

Sack 'Em Up, Pt. I / Sack 'Em Up, Pt. II - Gwenifer Raymond: Bandcamp had a really good article about American Primitive the other day https://daily.bandcamp.com/2018/10/10/american-primitive-list/ and I found this album in it and fell completely in love instantly. I listened to it five times in a row. It's just incredible and I'm so glad that the music I love is finally being rescued from the mire of New Acoustic youtube men with their slapping and tapping and harp guitars and moving forward in new ways with artists like Sarah Louise, Marisa Anderson and Gwenifer Raymond. Women are finally allowed to play guitar now and thank fuck. One of the things I really appreciate about this album is just how written it feels. Every part, even the very swirly Part One of this song feels very purposeful, and if not totally written at least improvised in a tight framework before moving into the completely written second half. There's nothing wrong with improv but in a genre like this that's almost overrun with guys putting out hour long improv records it's refreshing to hear someone with such a clear vision execute it so expertly.

Bleeding Finger Blues - Gwenifer Raymond: Also, get a fucking load of this. An absolute powerhouse performance from a master. There's not enough solo banjo music around and it's a shame because I don't know if there's a better argument for banjo as a solo instrument than this song. The other thing I like about this album is there’s three banjo songs on it, which works well for breaking up the sequencing and making each song really distinct in a genre where albums can really blend together.

4:30 - Danger: It's a shame that Danger never really fulfilled his potential. With songs as good as this as 19:11 he seemed set. But then he took about a decade off before his debut album and I guess he lost something along the way. Anyway, doesn't matter because when you've got a song as good as this it's all you need. Also here's a good video where someone just put this song over the bar scene from Terminator which really accentuates the vibe in my opinion. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z37R39-mff8

Crybaby - Abra: I love love love the production on this. A friend sent it to me because he said it reminded him of the Call Me Mr Telephone song I was raving about and he’s absolutely right. I love how formless it is, it goes through about three different verse ideas before finally getting to the chorus at about a minute and a half in and it’s only stronger for it. I’m so glad a new generation of darkwave adjacent people are discovering freestyle because this is great.

OMG!!! - Yelle: This song is probably best experienced with the music video. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eoWK4rV3INY It’s fantastic on its own, especially the “oh my god!” sample and the whole chorus section, but the video - titties out, covered in glitter, very very good dance move for the rising 'ooo' part, a hamster is there. Really accentuates it.

Copacabana (At The Copa) - Barry Manilow: Was thinking about this song the other day. Woke up with it in my head actually which was strange. I feel like this song and the Pina Colada song definitely take place in the same cinematic universe.

King Of The Dead - Cirith Ungol: I've been rereading Lord Of The Rings and also a very dodgy 70s sci-fi series called Dray Prescot and so divine fate has drawn me to discover Cirith Ungol. The good kind of metal where all the album covers could also be fantasy novel covers and all the songs are about how cool it would be to slay an ancient demon with a sword. I love this song because it feels impossible to sing it without doing some very dramatic face acting and also his voice is completely insane. I feel like this is maybe just how he talks.

Sugaree 10/21/1978 - Grateful Dead: Grateful Dead are good and ever since I came to terms with that I've felt like I'm always on the precipice of buying a box of tapes, covering my car in confusing stickers and dropping completely out of society. The problem with a big chunk of live Dead recordings that I've heard is that while the playing is always on point, the vocals can vary wildly - especially when they try any kind of harmony, but this recording is just great. Fantastic vocals with a lot of feeling, ample crowd noise so it doesn't feel like just a sterile soundboard recording, and of course an incredible extended jam.

Ring De Bell - Brother Resistance: I don't fully understand what rapso music is yet, I don't have enough understanding of the culture or surrounding genres. I basically just found this Best Of compilation and have been listening to it a LOT. As I understand it it's 70s Trinidadian calypso music that got very political, which is very cool. I'm a big fan of this sort of lyric where it feels like you could just go on and on for days about all the places you should ring the bell.

Kojack - David Rudder: The crown jewel of this compilation is of course this song I've posted about before and absolutely love to death. A protest song about them taking Kojack off the TV because it's too violent when shows like Dallas and Dynasty, which are far worse, remain on the air. Miami Vice! Before youtube comments and online petitions you had to make extremely good songs about this kind of thing, and its a huge shame that we've allowed this to die.

The Power Of Love - Celine Dion: I love Celine Dion because all her songs sound like they were recorded across 5 countries and 8 different studios and cost two million dollars. They always sound too expensive for casual listening to me, like I should have an emergency mink coat on me at all times just in case The Power Of Love starts playing in a supermarket.

Airworks - J Dilla: I've been listening to Donuts a bunch this month and really thinking about what makes him so good and the vast legion of Dilla imitators on soundcloud bad and I think this song is a good example. The main sample sounds straight up ugly, it's backwards and twisted to hell, the main strings part keeps folding over itself, it's just chaos but completely controlled chaos. Every imitator is so afraid to make a total mess like he does and is too focused on the underpinning laid-backness of the beat, where Dila somehow makes the relaxed feeling easily as a result of a million clashing elements.

Anti-American Graffiti - J Dilla: I also found a playlist on Spotify where someone had put together Donuts with all of the the original tracks it sampled (or at least the ones that are available on Spotify) and it's such an illuminating new way to listen to this album. https://open.spotify.com/user/keatonkreps/playlist/1TPeWt38uceWXD1Vhyf7wx?si=NJ_jHrYqQpCt18q-W9nrag

Marvel - Solillaquists Of Sound: Every genre has good music in it. Even rappity rap conscious hip hop has good songs like this one. There’s another song on this album called Popcorn that’s basically the It’s Media picture converted to a .wav but this song is good. Especially her vocals when they come in halfway through sounding like an astrology zine except good.

Rock Island Line - Johnny Cash: Johnny Cash has around one million songs about trains, including ‘Blue Train’, ‘Train Of Love’ and a song called ‘I’ve Got A Thing About Trains’ but this is the best one because it’s about train-related fraud and doing perhaps the most outlaw country manoeuvre ever and telling the toll man that you’re carrying livestock when you are in fact carrying pig iron.

I <3 U So (Skream's Made Zdar Feel Like He Was 20 Again Remix) - Cassius: Also as a kind of coda, here's Skream's version of I <3 U So, where he's completely ironed it out and turned it into a pulsing dnb thing which is always impressive to me when people completely reverse the feel of a song in a remix.

Worms Of The Senses / Faculties Of The Skull - Refused: Stereogum had a really good article about The Shape Of Punk To Come on its 20th anniversary and whether it really did turn out to be the shape of punk to come. They asked a bunch of people whether the title seemed arrogant and the vocalist from La Dispute had a really good answer where he said "But it’s like calling your shot and then fuckin’ hitting a home run. If it was arrogant, it was justifiably so." which is so great. https://www.stereogum.com/2020358/refused-shape-of-punk-to-come-turns-20/franchises/sounding-board/

listen here

#playlists

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crimsonblackrose · 5 years ago

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A friend invited me to meet her at the Vegan festival and I was not properly prepared at all. Vegan means without he use of animals or animal by products. This is used for both diet and lifestyle meaning most things are made from plants and nothing like dairy, eggs or honey is used in making food or consumed.

Almost everyone I saw at the festival brought their own supplies. I saw tons of people wandering around eating out of glass containers with their own forks/spoons/chopsticks. I saw people having their coffee filled up in tumblers. It felt like a block party where everyone had just popped out of their house with their own plates before chatting with their neighbors. I, of course, didn’t have any of my own containers in my bag. I had cash, I figured cash was a necessity since it was an outdoor festival. But that’s about as prepared as I was. Thankfully there was a little booth where you could rent their dishware, like these in the boxes pictured above. Which I thought was pretty cool. However I took what I was given in the containers/on the plates the vendors had, mostly because I kept jumping in ridiculously long lines and didn’t want to have to run back and rent a plate and then have to wait even longer.

First up I got in line for doughnuts. The line was huge and a person who’d come with my friend said that it was the thing they went straight for, because the line had been so long last year. So with a glowing review I got in line and waited to grab a doughnut.

The line was long. Very long. Several people in front of me had brought jumbo containers and bought tons of doughnuts, which made me a bit nervous until they put more out. My friends also left to grab other foods and eventually came back to give me money to buy them something.

For the three of us we each got one thing. I got a dark chocolate caramel doughnut and my friends got a mocha brownie and a green tea with strawberry jam doughnut (I was told to just pick something out for her, so I did).

Here’s the thing at the vegan festival. Popularity doesn’t always mean it’s actually good. I waited in line for that dark chocolate caramel doughnut forever and it was not worth it. Mind you I’m not vegan. For a vegan who hasn’t had a doughnut in a long time it might be great. But this was more like an overly sweet dense and dry bagel pretending it was doughnut. The caramel? A filling in the center like the cream cheese on a bagel. It was two complete separate halves stuck together with caramel as the glue and doused in the messiest icing imaginable. It was not easy to eat. It left me feeling like a dog who’d just taken on a tub of peanut butter without any water in sight. And my friends? Not the biggest fans of their own dry desserts. It does however get an A+ on looks. Those are some mighty appetizing looking doughnuts and brownie but they settled in my stomach like a rock and I was without water.

There was a lot of really cool sounding food as I wandered around. Jackfruit sloopy joes and bbq veggie burgers sounded delightful. I’ve always wanted to try a jackfruit masquerading as meat. However after a quick chat with the people working there I learned both were spicy and thus beyond my ability to enjoy. Which turned out to be a theme. Everyone was making their food quite spicy and thus my options were rather limited. At that point I really just wanted a black bean burger. My aunt back home makes great ones and the only black beans I can find here are dry which requires me to soak them for several days so I don’t accidentally poison myself…and I don’t have time for that. However I didn’t find any. Instead I spotted a long line for burgers.

Monks Butcher is a vegetarian friendly restaurant found in Itaewon that was working overtime making their one thing: Burgers.

The line was insanely long and it didn’t move. At all. Eventually I told my friends to go get what else they wanted. I.e. drinks/ find us a seat so we could divide and conquer. Which under the blue skies and beating sun I instantly regretted. It was my second long line and it was at least an hour that I waited to get tickets. Since it was a small booth with only about 2-3 people working they were working in a very specific order: Take about 10 orders and payment. Make burgers. Call numbers. Give out burgers. Take new orders.

Because people had left due to how long it took to cook and make the burgers people would wander off and they’d keep calling out numbers and no one would come forward and claim their burger, which slowed down the process by a lot. But eventually, when I was utterly exhausted we finally got our burgers.

The burgers included Beyond Meat. (Which is a brand of meatless patties made from plants.) They were pretty good but by the time I got to sit down and eat I was utterly exhausted and a little bitter hangry. The burger was decent, however it also had sriracha mayo on it which is spicy so my enjoyment of it was greatly decreased. It also hadn’t been a cheap burger so I was wishing I’d found something else to enjoy instead.

The final thing I got before leaving was a turmeric latte. It was pretty good and helped wash down the donuts which I’d saved for a dessert.

My phone decided the camera wouldn’t work so thank you to GuacandrollinSeoul for being patient taking all the pictures I asked her to and sharing them with me.

I think my first vegan festival was a mixed success. I kind of wish I’d had the foresight or even just a heads up to bring my own containers. It was windy and the ground was dusty and I nearly lost my burger just walking to a table to sit down. I also wouldn’t have ended up with chocolate all over my bag from the doughnut if I’d brought some sort of glassware to put it in. I also wish I hadn’t decided to wait in lines the entire time. I feel like I didn’t get to fully enjoy the festival and ended up just hot and hangry by the time I did get my food. It was probably not the best, but there was a lot of cool things I did enjoy like the whole block party feel of it and the fact they’d set up areas for you to wash your dishes (borrowed or your own). And that there were so many options. I didn’t think vegan was an easy life style to maintain in Korea but it was a packed festival and everyone was very friendly.

2019 Vegan Festival A friend invited me to meet her at the Vegan festival and I was not properly prepared at all.

#food festivals #restaurants #seoul #south korea #travel #vegan #vegan festivals #vegan food in seoul

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generation-of-kuroko-and-kagami · 6 years ago

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My Favorite KnB Move

I’m finally getting around to this post. So, I want to talk about all the different moves in Kuroko no Basket and rank them from my least favorite to my favorite. When I say moves, I mean a singular play rather than a certain player’s entire ability. Meaning, for example, I’ll talk about Ignite Pass, but I won’t talk about Kuroko’s overall ability to make invisible passes. I’ll talk about Meteor Jam but not about Kagami’s jumping ability. Make sense?

I’m also only gonna talk about the ones that are unique to that player. Well, I mean, we know that Kise can preform almost all of these with Perfect Copy, but you get what I mean. So, really, the post won’t end up being very long, but I still wanna talk about these signature moves. Kuroko’s moves are gonna make a big appearance.

Vice Claw

This can be done by both Kiyoshi and Murasakibara, but really, it’s Kiyoshi’s technique. Basically, because of his huge hands, he can grasp and steal the ball with one hand. This is, in fact, one of the moves seen in Kuroko no Basket. However, it doesn’t shake me in my boots to much, so let’s move on.

Thor’s Hammer

Murasakibara’s technique. Since he’s a giant, he just spins his body while going up for a dunk and then he can literally bring down the hoop. Thor’s Hammer is formidable, for sure. It’s not fun to deal with, especially for those blocking him as those players are most likely to get blown away. It’s cool, but not the coolest thing on this list.

Ignite Pass

Not Kai because they’re different. I don’t know how to explain this. Kuroko punches the ball so it goes super fast? Yeah, that’s good. The first time he uses it, it’s really satisfying because it’s his only move at the time that doesn’t involve misdirection. However, our boy used his skill points to get an upgrade, so this old-model Ignite Pass isn’t gonna end up very high on this list.

Vanishing Drive

This was the first technique Kuroko developed in the anime, right? He used a couple others before, but I think as far as things we saw Kuroko developing, this was the first. I really like the idea behind this move, especially since it’s one of the ones we’ve most seen being fought against by the opponent-- usually to no avail. Usually whoever Kuroko is up against with this, they’ll say, “You’re not getting by!” But then he does. Almost always. It’s awesome. Not my favorite of Kuroko’s moves, though.

Cyclone Pass

I just really liked how this was presented the first time we saw it. The motions, the speed, the surprise from the crowd afterwards. It’s all really cool. I like that it’s also a speedy pass that anyone can catch (probably). I mean, Seirin is getting used to all of his passes, but Cyclone Pass has always been pretty universal, which is nice. I don’t know how else to explain, so I’ll stop.

Heaven/Earth/Void

I’m grouping these three because that’s how they’re presented, but they are all different shots. I think the idea of the shots only varying due to the centers of gravity shifting is pretty cool. Heaven and Earth aren’t that impressive on their own, but Void is pretty awesome, especially since you supposedly can’t stop it whether you see it coming or not. Forcing an opponent not to jump is awesome. These shots are ultimately in the middle of the pack for me, but I still really like them.

Mirage Shot

Oh, Tatsuya, what a smart cookie you are. The fact that he thought this up is just really cool. The mechanics are freakin’ awesome! It’s almost like Phantom Shot, isn’t it? Seeing Tatsuya use a small bit of misdirection in combination with his overall abilities make this shot really appealing, to me. I’m having a hard time figuring out how to explain these things, so I’m just gonna keep moving, I guess.

Phantom Shot

Speaking of. I don’t know why I like Phantom Shot so much. Probably because of the weird form that Kuroko takes when he uses it. And also how baffled people are when they see it. It reminds of Midorima’s high-projectile threes because of the high arc it seemingly takes. Kuroko’s a pretty smart cookie, too.

Meteor Jam

This move is kind of like all of Kagami’s abilities combined and amped up. He jump so freaking high for this shot, it’s unreal. Like, it’s literally unreal; no one but an anime character could do that. The way he just throws it in, too, is kind of exhilarating. Honestly, if someone got hit in the face with that ball, they’d die. The power is insane. Kagami’s power is actually, probably, my favorite part about his abilities. It defines him as a player, so it’s cool to see it all bunched up in one move like this.

Ignite Pass Kai

It’s just... it’s so satisfying to watch. Kuroko like snaps his arm out and then the ball travels to a different dimension, it’s badass. The lighting effects that were used to illustrate and animate this move make it all the more appealing. I think seeing Kuroko, a physically weak individual, blow past opponents with Ignite Pass Kai is so, so brilliant. I love it a lot.

Sky Direct Three-Point Shot

This is my favorite, boys. Talk about satisfying. Is it the individual components that make me love it so much? The teamwork? The mechanics? The skill required? All of the above. Seriously, Midorima is awesome for trusting Takao enough to shoot his pass like this, and Takao is seriously skilled to be able to pass the ball into Midorima’s hands flawlessly. I’ve gushed on this move before, and it’s kind of the whole reason I wanted to make this post in the first place. No other move tops this, man. It’s like the Kuroko-Kagami Alley-Oop but with a “hold my beer” attitude, you know? “So, you can catch a pass and dunk it? Watch us from the three-point line, bitch.” It’s just so awesome!

Okay, I’m done. Just a short little post for the sake of talking about the Sky Direct. Don’t know what I’m posting next, but I’ll try to make it a little nicer and more in depth than this one.

P.S. sorry for the trash gifs, it’s super hard to find full sized ones of these moves. Also, if I missed some or didn’t put something in that you thought I should’ve, let me know! I probably didn’t put it in because I saw it as an ability not a move, but I’d still like to hear from you! Thanks for reading!

#kuroko no basket #Kuroko Tetsuya #kagami taiga #tatsuya himuro #Midorima Shintarou #Takao Kazunari #Murasakibara Atsushi #Kiyoshi Teppei #reo mibuchi #knb #Kuroko's Basketball

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kurainohikaru · 6 years ago

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I made a few friends Cussing out Cinder/ Rwby Volume 6 Episode 1: Argus Limited

So at the premiere tonight they began it with showing a recap of the last 2 episodes of Volume 5, the first scene being a closeup of Cinder’s face. Now I’m not normally that rude guy at a theater but as soon as she showed up on screen I just shouted: “Get off the screen, you stupid bitch!” Now this is in no disrespect to Jessica Nigri or CRWBY (maybe a bit of salt to M&K for waiting this long to give the backstory of her if we are ever even gonna get it but I digress.) I covered my mouth in shame but to my surprise, most everyone laughed (the theatre wasn’t even close to full so it wasn’t that many people)., so I continued to add my colorful commentary throughout, shouting, “BYE FELICIA!” in the silent moment where she is falling to her “death” frozen and there’s no audio, got a good few laughs outta that.

Beware Spoilers below!

So after the Adam Trailer and Director’s commentary we finally got into the meat and potatoes, Rwby Volume 6 episode 1: Argus Limited.

I wasn’t one of the people who avoided spoilers and so I was aware of the scenes shown at NYCC and I gotta say... I have NO IDEA why the kiss ignited the ship wars like it did. You couldn’t even see the kiss! It was from a zoomed out shot and Blake’s body blocked the cheek she kissed. Granted I love both ships (though still holding out for dem Seamonkeys, I know it won’t happen let a boy dream!), so I loved it anyway. Also, the entire theatre SCREAMED when Neptune showed up, if only for a brief moment.

What I CAN say about the Blake and Sun moment is that in that one conversation we had more development for Sun since his iteration into the series! Not only did he lament for how long he’s left his team and recognized how he’s kinda been a shitty leader lately, but he also realized that he would always be there for Blake, but she doesn’t need him right now and she’s where she needs to be. And that was both incredibly mature and wise of him to say. #ProudofmySun I have no doubt they and CFVY will be returning in the Vacuo Arc, if not sooner.

There was also a great conversation prior to this between Blake an Ilia, and a heartfelt teary hug from Ilia wishing Blake didn’t have to go. Honestly, that made me more shook up than Sun’s departure, I felt bad for her. Hopefully, we haven’t seen the last of her though.

I really enjoyed the overall episode’s blending of the serious and comedic. I think they’ve finally achieved that perfect balance they were looking for and I hope it persists, instead of bleeding into morosely overserious or completely out of place comedic.

There was an awkward bees moment where Blake tries to help Yang reach for her bag only for Yang to say she doesn’t have to do that, citing that it will be a bit awkward at first but she is genuinely glad to have her teammate back. I hope this isn’t the end of their drama because there definitely NEEDS to be a long tearful discussion about the repercussions of the fallout of Volume 3.

There is a brief bout atop the train with new Grimm(which I will get back to) before RWBY and JNR decide they need to separate to protect the people from attacking Grimm. Why you ask? Well because Ozpin decides to casually let everyone know, and I point out that even Qrow was surprised, that the Relic attracts Grimm.

It seems the poster will indeed reflect the emotions of the girl’s this volume as this raises Ire with both Yang and Weiss, Yang asking why would he keep this from them? Before he can respond though, Ruby cuts her off and says it doesn’t matter, to which Yang and Weiss have the biggest “Are you fucking kidding me?” looks. I’ll be honest I didn’t see Blake’s reaction just because of how strong Yang and Weiss’s were, which makes sense given their disillusionment from Raven. Also, Ruby’s scythe surrounding Oscar/Oz on the poster symbolizing her protecting him seems like it will be something that plays out.

Jaune and Ruby share a moment, Jaune making Ruby promise she’ll meet them in Argus before going through with their plan of Jaune amplifying Ren’s aura to mask the entire front of the train while RWBY, Qrow, and Oz/Oscar stay in the back trains.

Jaune’s semblance mastery is kinda insane already that and he has a shit ton of Aura since Ren was able to do that no problem and Jaune also healed an insignificant character’s severely bruised arm that got pinched between the tunnel and the wall after the tunnel ceased the first bout. Not to mention, we have even more proof of his large Aura capacity as that was at least a good few dozens of people in the train cars. This is going to prove to make some interesting combos later given we saw how fast Weiss could summon in Volume 5 after being affected by it #JauneistooOPPlzNerf

So as to the question I bet you’re all wondering...

How’s the action?

Now I don’t claim to be any animation guru and can’t point out finer details here but the action seemed more well-paced and much cleaner than anything in Volume 5.

Some Highlights are as follows:

Ruby actually fighting decently and not just a bunch of motion blur scythe swinging.

Ruby saving Weiss with her semblance atop the train when the tunnel forces them to retreat.

Weiss Ice skating/leaping off her glyphs atop the train. Personally, I thought this was one of the best flair decisions combat wise.

Fun Yang and Blake 1v1 moments.

Amazing cinematic 1v1 of Qrow vs what I assume was the Sphinx Grimm all the others were much smaller and what I assume are Baby Manticore Grimm as concept art one was HUGE.

Amazing team RWBY moment (without ship names sadly) where they need to restrict the Sphinx’s movement to help Qrow. Yang puts herself on the opposite side of the team where Qrow is and draws it’s attention while Blake throws her ribbon of Gambol Shroud over the top of the Grimm’s torso. As it falls downward, Yang shotgun blasts Gambol shroud several times, the ribbon rewrapping around the Grimm several times before she jams it into the ground, holding it as Blake pulls on her end, effectively restricting it. Weiss then comes up and glyphs each of the wings of the Grimm freezing and then subsequently shattering them.

The moment culminates with a split screen showing both Ruby’s and Qrow’s faces, before each of them sniper/shotgun momentum themselves forward, each in scythe form. Qrow and then Ruby is shown to spin in a 360 spiral similar to what we’ve seen Ruby do before, executing the Grimm as it releases a final fireball. I thought this was beautiful to look at and a Nice touch illustrating Ruby was clearly trained by Qrow as mentioned in the very first episode of the show.

The fight ends as the train gets derailed (I can’t remember why but the fireball either blocked or derailed the track somehow I was too busy processing the above badass moment). Weiss quickly thinks to soften the blow gravity glyphing everyone atop the train as they crash.

Everyone is fine post-crash but I DID notice that the relic previously attached to Oscar’s hip is now missing. Which I will assume will lead into the next episode where we see Ruby find it in the shot from the trailer, as another point in the trailer shows it on her hip.

The Episode ends with the strange old woman (Who I keep calling Katara thanks to a tumblr post on here lol) saying that was close. My money is more on her being a silver-eyed warrior than a maiden but only time will tell!

All in all, I loved this first episode, it felt very refreshing and fun to watch and I hope this momentum continues through the rest of the volume!

The night ended with the few people tracking me down after the movie, saying I was hilarious and inviting me out for some food, drinks, and theory-filled good company! Can’t wait to see what comes next!

#rwby6 #rwby6 spoilers #rwby volume 6 premiere #rwby theory #rwby bumbleby #rwby blacksun #RWBY Sun #argus limited #Rwby Volume 6 Episode 1

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