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#bittersweet atleast
variksel · 2 years
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kind of a sad post fyi and major spoilers for the beginning of dndads s2 but i started listening to it recently (pleaseee dont put spoilers in the tags im at ep7) and while listening to ep6 and thinking about sparrow and lark, about how happy and carefree they were at the beginning of s1 and i realized how over time they grew up and became so. sad? as characters? sparrow wishing for his son to be normal and lark betraying his twin by sleeping with his brothers wife like. idk this is hard to articulate but the twins were my favourite kids in s1 (still are, theyre just now super interesting) because they were so funny and so happy and now theyre. in the best way possible, not anymore
id say its because the forgotten realms traumatized them but its not only because of that. they just grew up. and it made me realize that FUCK. despite how much henry loved them and how much they got support and how much he tried, they still turned out like that. and isnt that just what growing up is. isnt that what having kids is. you just physically can not guarantee at all that no matter what you do and what choices you make, that your kids will grow up to be happy. neither can you do that to yourself, not really. you cant fully control what kind of person youll become, just like your parents couldnt when they raised you. idk rambling at this point
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vaugarde · 2 years
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oh so when moth flight has kittens as a medicine cat and gives them away to strangers, one of which let his own son die and considered killing babies, because she can’t deal and somehow cant ask her clanmates to help, shes noble and brave and wise and shaped things for generations to come and she gets to die peacefully with all her children being like “wow mom that was so cool of you, we’re so happy and you are so smart and epic”, but when leafpool has kittens as a medicine cat and gives them to her sister who she knows wont mistreat them, she’s treated like shit by most people around her and shes so unforgivable that her children can’t help but snark about this at her funeral and shes almost sent to cat hell. ok
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doggolol · 2 months
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that final season was insane. like UMM????
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having solangelo brainrot is all fun and games until you remember you were the will to your exs nico and he was the nico to your will
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mint-chocolate-rooibos · 11 months
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loki spent centuries learning physics, went through possibilities time and time again, even learning how to stop time. all for giving everyone a chance. all for his friends to live and be able to do what they want in life. and he will still end up alone for maybe the rest of time. and there is still one person unhappy because he is gone. because he wasn't able to choose loki.
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bad-kendi · 5 months
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Ikuhara's works are soooo emotionally devastating but also theres still like a sense of hope and how life will just keep on going. Idk it kinda made me less suicidal I think
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winterrbluess · 1 month
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JJK spoilers
This chapter....THIS chapter has me sobbing a bucket like Yuji, he is so precious. His growth has astonished me so much. His introspection and the ability to step in other's shoes and sympathise with them (even Sukuna) is his greatest strength. His whole fight was to bring Megumi back, to save one person atleast and now not only he grew out of his cog mentality but is leaving the choice in Megumi's hands that it's fine if he wants to give up. For the first time someone tells Megumi it's fine to give up and not wanting to fight anymore or get stronger or fulfill any space or role. Yuji giving Megumi the agency to deal with his loss and trauma, to choose for himself...grieve and just end it all. It's so tragic yet beautiful with how Yuji is always there for Megumi and vice versa. And Megumi's monologue about wanting to enjoy the domesticity of life..God it's heartbreaking how he just wanted to...exist, to live like a 16 year old, safe and surrounded by his loved ones without the burden of being strongest in future on his shoulder.
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This panel is so bittersweet...with it being directly parallel to Gojo one but with such stark contrast..Yuji is there for Megumi only..not an ally, not the strongest sorcerer of future but his friend.
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Your stories have definitely scratched that Astarion itch that I've had since I started the game!
One thing that's diffently not sat right with me at the end of the game, is how tav and the gang don't run after astarion after he loses his immunity to the sun. I would imagine that if the player character was romantically involved with the guy they would atleast try to shield or comfort the poor guy. A short drabble on that would be awesome!
That's so sad, I heard that's what happens 😭😭 I'm in act 3 and haven't had to see it for myself yet so yes, let's do some preemptive therapy there! And just warning since I haven't beaten the game yet I'm sure this will be inaccurate as fuck, but also with spoilers somehow ~
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It was an exhilarating feeling, to win against all odds. One that Astarion had never been confident he would experience. It felt good, final. The official beginning of his new free life, even if it was bittersweet.
This was the bitter part, the end of his illithid protection. The sun was barely peeking over the horizon, and the burn was already starting. He was being an idiot, standing there with the rest of you like he belonged, waiting for the last possible second before he had to scuttle down in the darkness. But he wanted to see this out. Hadn't he earned that right?
According to the laws of reality, no. No he hadn't, because you had barely opened your mouth before the pain started to overwhelm him. The others would be able to hear it, the sickening sound of his skin crackling.
He was out of time. But before he could make a break for it, you happened. Astarion had been a little preoccupied with his impending doom to pay close attention to what you had been mumbling. But then sudden blackness was blanketing above your heads, opaque enough to make it as dark as night.
Astarion's eyes widened as the pain subsided, surprised beyond belief.
You were looking at him with concern in your eyes, gesturing to the think cloud of darkness above your head, "Will this be dark enough? Can it still get through?"
Astarion stared at you, momentarily confused on why you would do something like that. Before he remembered, oh. Yes. The extended care for his well-being was probably included in the whole love thing. Of course. Obviously.
That was definitely going to take some getting used to.
But the reasoning didn't stop an idiotic smile from blooming on his face.
You grinned back at him, somehow still managing to read his mind even without the tadpoles, "Did you really think I would forget about you?"
He had, but through no fault of your own. One of these days he was going to actually remember that he was worth the effort to keep alive.
"Thank you darling," Astarion said, ignoring the quested as he waltzed up to you. He grabbed your hand in his, bringing it up to his lips to kiss, "Just what would I do without you?"
"Speaking of," You turned to the Emperor, a question in your eyes as you vaguely waved upward, "Is there anything we can do about this particular problem?"
"The astral tadpole is still-"
"I'll pass on that, thank you very much," Astarion interrupted, cringing at the very thought of willingly letting another worm into his brain, "But I appreciate the thought."
There were worse things than living his life in darkness. And Astarion was counting becoming a mind flayer in the top three.
He watched, participated even in everyone's final goodbyes, always eyeing you at of the corner of his eye. It's not that he thought you would leave after you both declared your eternal love for each other, but... the two of you hadn't exactly talked about the specifics of the future either.
But that didn't stop you from leaving together. Astarion hadn't expected you to keep the dark cloud above his head as you walked the streets, startling nearly every passerby. But hells, the heroes of Baldur's gate had earned the right to a little strangeness.
You both had decided on going to the nearest, most windowless inn that you could find. Astarion wanted nothing more than to scrub the brain viscera from his skin and sleep for three days. Preferably with you in his arms.
But before all that... he had to know something.
The question was out of him as soon as you both were behind closed doors, "So what happens next to the great hero of Baldur's Gate? I'm sure you have something in mind."
He was just praying those future plans still involved him.
You blinked at him, head cocked like he was asking a silly question, "We go and find you a cure so you can walk in the sun again of course. What else would we do?"
That took Astarion aback, "I-Do you think that's really possible?"
"Well," You started, counting off on your fingers, "We know that illithid powers can do it. As well as devil contacts and ritualistic demon sacrifices. If that's all possible then that means there has to be something else on the other end of the spectrum, right?"
Astarion didn't exactly share your blind confidence. But you did have a point. The two of you had managed so many impossible feats in such a short amount of time. What was one more?
"I suppose there's a chance," Astarion said, hope fluttering in his chest with every word, "And if there is a chance no matter how small, I'm going to take it. But..."
He didn't want to ask, but he needed to know, "Are you sure this is what you want? I would... understand if you wanted to go your own way."
In all honesty, Astarion would not understand. He'd be absolutely furious. Especially after everything you'd been through. This was more of a confirmation for his waning self-confidence than anything else, versus a sincere to desire to let you go your own way. He had no intention of letting you go, not if he could help it.
But his near certainty in your feelings was the only thing that gave him the confidence to ask the question in the first place. And you did not disappoint.
"No, this is what I want," You insisted, reaching out to take his hand in yours, "You're what I want."
That was exactly what Astarion needed to hear. He used your joined hands to tug you closer, face to face.
"Good, because as selfless as I am, I really did not want to let you go," Astarion smiled, leaning in to lightly press a kiss to your lips, "I hope you realize that my love has made me a tad bit obsessed with you my dear."
"I'm sure it's no worse than me," You sighed, resting your forehead against his own, "You've really ruined me for anyone else haven't you?"
Astarion grinned, leaning in for another kiss. He had every intention of making it stay that way, for as long as you would have him.
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No thoughts.
Just thinking about how Reyna kept her distance from Jason because of Venus, fearing heartbreak, but ended up getting heartbroken anyway.
Just thinking about how Jason felt guilty about Reyna's feelings for him, thinking that he led her on, and felt truly sorry that he didn't love her back.
Just thinking about how bitter Reyna sounded when she said that Jason was no longer fully roman anymore.
Just thinking about how, upon seeing Thalia's eyes, the only thing Reyna can think of is Jason's startling blue stare.
Just thinking about how Jason could tell that Reyna was tired simply by noting how her shoulders move.
Just thinking about how Reyna rarely compliments anyone, but fondly calls Jason an "all American boy".
Just thinking about how Jason would never bet against Reyna under any circumstances, and knows if anyone is capable of completing dangerous missions, it's Reyna.
Just thinking about how Reyna daydreamt of her and Jason holding hands, walking in the garden.
Just thinking about how Reyna and Jason would geek over their shared interest of roman history.
Just thinking about how Jason HATES unkept promises, yet the only unkept promise he'd unintentionally made was that if he and Reyna would go visit Diocletian's sceptre, it would only be them visiting TOGETHER. Not seperately. The fates ruined his chance of keeping that promise.
Just thinking about how Reyna would've felt upon hearing that her once best friend, died tragically saving a god, and that she would never see him again.
Just thinking about how Jason dies with the guilt of not properly reconciling with his old friend.
Just thinking about how Reyna lives with the guilt of keeping her distance from him because of that wretched warning Venus gave her. Maybe if she had not, would they have been together? Would they have atleast remained best friends? Would they have not grown apart?
Just thinking about how Reyna looked like she'd been crying for hours during Jason's funeral.
Just thinking about how they both knew their friendship would never be the same again but refused to confront that bitter reality, so they ran away from it.
Just thinking about how they never even shared one last hug together.
Just thinking about how in the end, both of them most likely only had bittersweet memories of eachother, and that neither of them got to say their final goodbyes.
No thoughts, just the tragic end of Jason Grace and Reyna Avila Ramirez's friendship
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nouvxllev · 7 months
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Hi, love your writing! I have a request where reader and Jenna are in a long distance relationship and reader decides to surprise Jenna after hearing Jenna’s been having a tough week filming or something. Just something along those lines haha
a flight away
Pairing: Jenna Ortega x Fem!Reader
Summary: ^^ request!!!
Words: 3.1k
Warnings: bittersweet
a/n: first of all,, thank you so much!!!! and second of all, ill try my best! hope this is to ur liking anon
masterlist
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You didn't know what you were getting into the first thing in the morning when you checked your phone at exactly 6:34 AM.
Normally, you'd do the routine where you stare at your wallpaper (it was a picture of Jenna) for a good 20 minutes before internally dying inside because of why should she be such a hardworking woman to the point you only get to see her for about 1-2 months before leaving again, but then fall in love with her like it was the first time for that exact reason entirely.
Now, you woke up to Jenna's notifications flooding her digital face, more voicemails and missed calls rather than messages.
Obviously, you panicked out of your fucking mind.
You knew she was safe in Ireland where she was filming season 2 of Wednesday. She has more bodyguards around her than people trying to get her autograph, and she has her co-stars with her at all times.
She was safe. Safe. The word almost sounded like a prayer you repeated in your head as you eyed her messages.
You couldn't open the voicemail for the reasons that you might hear an announcement that Jenna has got into some serious shit and might need to be hospitalized and you absolutely need to be there for her right now.
But after 5 minutes of going through all stages of grief, you pressed play.
You were not expecting Jenna to outright scream at her phone in the middle of the night.
"Y/n. Y/n, I—God, I don't even know where to start with this. I'm just so… so tired. From everything, from everyone. I don't know why, seriously, I don't know why but i just—I just broke down when I came back to my apartment."
"I'm sorry. I'm sorry I have to message you like this in the middle of the night. I'm doing well in Ireland, but I'm having such a rough fucking time in shooting every scene. It's not like I hate everyone on the set, I love them, I… I don't know."
"I need you, please Y/n. Even if it's just your voice, just please give me a piece of your presence. I need something to hold on, someone to tell me that it's going to be okay and I'll get through this. I know, it's a bit overdramatic but… I just miss you so damn much, and this distance is killing me more than ever. We haven't seen eachother atleast a year now. I'm so tired."
"Please pick up, y/n. It's selfish for me to ask, but I just want to hear you. It feels like I'm losing myself in all of this. I don't want to break down in front of everyone on set tomorrow. But, y/n. Y/n, y/n, y/n, it's so hard."
"I love you. I love you so much. So damn much, it's killing me. I miss New York, I miss our home, I miss you. I wish you were here. I'm sorry for letting you hear me like this over the phone, it's unbecoming. I love you, goodnight."
Your heart sank.
It was all too surreal, all too agonizing, like you feel bile coming up to your throat.
The daunting feeling of Jenna experiencing all of these emotions at once dragged your heart, her voice like a film tape in your mind as if were right there with Jenna in her room.
You heard her cry, you watched her curl herself up on her mattress all while she clung to her phone as if it was your hand she wished she held everyday.
You craved for the warmth of her hand, and you imagine she craves yours as much as you do with hers while you longed to be there with her, for her. To hold her close to you and offer the comfort she needed. The very touch that healed every scar, present and future, was replaced by the lifeless screen of your phone.
You were there, you swear you're there, but you couldn't do anything but listen.
On top of everything, you blamed yourself.
You called her almost everyday, the long-distance relationship being almost a mere label to the both of you.
You texted her every morning and went to bed with her every night. You were there, always. Yet, it felt like you neglected her. Like a piece of you was missing before you even realized it.
Now all you can think about are her restless nights.
The days where Jenna staged a performance with a heavy heart while you smiled with joy, the nights where you slept peacefully in your own bed while Jenna tossed and turned in discomfort in something unfamiliar, sacrificing her rest for your peaceful evenings to remain the same.
You don't know how many days she's been like this, nor do you want to know, the thought was unbearable enough.
And you almost feel bad of booking a plane ticket rather than responding to her. You were just a flight away anyways.
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Shit, her head hurts.
Hammering, actually.
Like someone cracked it open with an axe made out of obsidian right down the middle and served it to her on a silver platter.
She never should've accepted that afterparty invite from Georgie.
If she never got absolutely wasted to shots from bottles of alcohol, maybe Jenna would've had the brain capacity to curse him under her breath for being such a good damn friend.
Worst of all, she was missing someone. Horribly.
You.
Not just you, but everything of you.
Your scent, your warmth, your presence, your heartbeat against hers—a cruel reminder on how she was missing all of these.
She longed to hear the way you laugh as if you heard the funniest joke ever, the way you smile at Jenna as if she was a saint that had done nothing wrong, the way you loved her oh so dearly like she was the only person that made you crawl out of your skin in a good way.
Now it was taken from her. All of it. She felt like she was nothing without her muse, which was actually the case here.
Jenna was supposed to stay for a year with you—a whole fucking year! A whole year was watered down to a pathetic one to two months because of a change in filming schedule that Jenna had, somehow, no right to turn down.
That's not even half of the time Jenna spent miles away from you, and she couldn't even apologize properly in person since she had to depart so early in the morning.
The thought of you expecting Jenna to wake up beside you with a smile and a kiss only to be woken up with a cold bed with a note apologizing a million times made her flight to another country worse.
She would've been happier if the plane crashed then she would be begging to whatever afterlife she was in to bring her back to the living and spend her life with you.
It's gotten to that point where she looked just like Wednesday off-cam if not worse. She even almost snapped at Emma when she tried consoling her.
Now she sits in her trailer, on a chair, not with you, but with... a chair. Along with her script on a table.
Jenna tried a few lines, repeated them, tried a few lines, repeated them, and it all just comes back full circle.
No matter what she does, she still fucking missed you and wished she could just tell everyone she wanted and needed a nap along with her girlfriend by her side until it reaches winter of 2025.
She could take a nap right now, but you weren't with her. The cold surface would make you appear in her dreams like the loving parasite you are to her and she would only yearn more.
She could take a walk right now, but little ice cream shops along the way would only make her reminisce about the times you would take her out on dates every damn day like you had buckets on buckets of gold to spend it all on Jenna. She would only miss you even more.
She could talk to one of her co-stars, but they weren't you. The stupid and fuckass conversations you'd often bring up, they wouldn't do that. Even if they did, it wouldn't have the same effect.
Why did life suddenly become so difficult when she now has the most gorgeous, talented, and loving girlfriend a billion miles away from her!?
After putting her arms over her eyes, trying to calm down the impending woe and sadness she was facing, a soft knock on her door interrupted all of it.
"Jenna?" She heard Emma's voice, soft like she was hesitant to talk to her if not for Jenna responding with a hum, "we've been calling you for 5 minutes now. It's our scene."
Her voice was serious, though quiet. Or maybe that was just concern, Jenna has been distant for a while now.
Letting out a sigh, she replied, "Right, I'll be there in a minute."
She pulled herself up from the chair. She didn't really need to return to the makeup team, just thankful she didn't cry herself to death thinking about you.
She turned her back to see Emma standing in front of the door, half opened, peering half of her body, "Jenna, you know you can take a break if you want—"
Jenna only offered a weak smile, her steps matching Emmas as they walked over to set, "It's fine. Don't worry about me too much."
Her thoughts are too different from what she was saying, but it wasn't like she could say she'd rather kill herself before even stepping foot out of her trailer without seeing y/n.
"Jenna!" Tim Burton called her out, his voice calm, stretching out her name like he was going to say something completely off-guard.
The girl in question was already staring him down as he spoke, "We've got a change in script"
The girl in question was already staring him down as he spoke, "We've got a change in script. Nothing too big, just that we've added a new extra that Wednesday needs to interact with on this scene."
Isn't that a slight bit unprofessional?
Jenna could let out the most exhausted and exasperated sigh if not for Tim being the one of the sweetest, yet often odd, directors she ever worked with.
"Yeah, sure, can I atleast meet this person—"
"Sorry, Jenna," He lead her to the place she needed to be, the extra in question being no where near in Jenna's sight, "but this is really a last minute change and we just need you both to improvise."
"Wait, but—!"
Her protests were already too late, looking like it went through one ear and out the other through the audio. She was just grateful she had enough training and years in this industry to immediately get into character.
It was supposed to be her scene with Emma, lurking in the woods, a lantern between her fingers as they approached a silhouette of a figure.
Now it was just Jenna in the scene, lurking in the woods, leaves crunching under her combat boots as she watched the camera move alongside her body, not a lantern but rather a flashlight gripped on her palm.
She was informed that the silhouette in question was one of her co-stars that she had met before hand, a tall figure in the distance that she could immediately distinguish based on the back alone.
Now... it's... not exactly what she was expecting to see when she got in character.
She approached the figure, confused as ever, not because it was in her script to do so, but she was actually so damn confused it wouldn't be a surprise to her if she was imagining things.
Because the silhouette looked exactly like you.
Jenna knew you from the slightest shade of your skin, even when it's so damn dark outside.
She knew you from the way you stood, the way you sometimes would do whatever it is with your hands when idle, the way you'd often slightly tilt your head back when you're suppressing a hard giggle—which you were and failing to do so—the way you, in your own words by the way, aren't a good actress for Jenna to practice her lines on without laughing like a total maniac.
Holy shit.
Jenna's mind raced, all too fast for her liking, her heart pounding in her chest, and her body almost in flames at the thought of you being here. Finally being here.
It couldn't be real, of course it wouldn't, why would you be on set in fucking Ireland? It must be a trick, much so a figment of her imagination and maybe more or less girlfriend deprived of everything you gave her. But as she drew closer, her steps doing all but walking slowly to the silhouette, it because unmistakable who it was.
It was you.
Her best friend ever since she learned how to act in middle school, a friend that stuck with her forever even in times where you could've left her all alone.
Her girlfriend. The girlfriend of almost a few years that she loved and cherished with all her might, even if she were to commit a sin, there would be no greater wrong than Jenna disliking you.
It was her home. At last.
Without a second thought, Jenna abandoned everything, forgetting that she was even supposed to be the character she was and rushed towards her, arms already stretched in a desperate embrace to feel your warmth against her body once again. Your heartbeat against hers. It was all too surreal, all too fucking real.
Jenna threw herself into your arms, wrapping you in a tight hug that almost knock you both off of balance in the dirt. Your body stumbling forwards as your back was faced on her.
You still smelled like New York, mixed with that familiar airpot scent that Jenna always got used to. But now, it felt so new, so new that you were hugging her, touching her like it was the last symphony you'd play in your life.
She hugged you, tight. Her hands gripping your clothes like you'd disappear in a matter of seconds. You can hear her taking deep breaths against your body, gulps, and her hold tightening onto you with each passing moment.
As you turned around, you waited for Jenna to slowly loosen her grip, her eyes searching yours as if she still could hardly believe that you were here, standing in front of her after all this time apart. And now, you couldn't believe devotion was still present in her eyes, that warm of a gaze that you always managed to capture in her eyes.
"You're here. Y/n, you're—" She sniffed, looking up at you as she cupped your cheeks, a stray tear trickling down her eyes that shimmered, "You're really here." She whispered, her voice cracking almost to a fault. Her voice was fragile, it crushed you. "Why, how? What, I don't under—"
You smiled softly, chuckling even, you didn't expect it to go this way. "That's not part of the script, Wednesday." You joked, even if it was a serious moment, you always seemed to have one.
"You're not part of the script, why are you here!?"
You reached up to brush a stray lock of hair from Jenna's fringe as Wednesday, your touch gentle and reassuring like it never changed over the years. It was still there, your love was still there, and you were waiting for your lover to come back once in your arms to show how much you missed her oh so dearly.
"I missed you." You simply said, slightly swaying the both of you back and forth
Jenna couldn't say anything, let alone form a few words, but the way she hugged you yet again after a few seconds of silence with such tenderness and compassion, it said everything that you needed to know.
Everything that you lost and you hold today, nothing mattered. Not even the heart that wouldn't stop beating against your chest, it wouldn't matter if you died, atleast it was in her arms.
"So I don't get to have an I miss you back?"
Jenna pulled back slightly, you can see how her eyes glistened looking if it was something that not even renaissance artists could sclupt.
"You don't know how many nights I've spent crying because of how I missed you." She mumbled, voice below a whisper, her mouth hung open from her slight crying, taking a deep breath as she let herself be in the most vulnerable state with you yet.
"You cried?"
"Without you? Terribly so."
Your heart ached when Jenna started to cry, she looked small. Smaller than ever in your arms when you once held her for the first time when she became a busy actress.
She broke down, almost melting in your presence as you try to hold her up. You knew there were cameras rolling, that there were people on set watching this go down, but you knew that you were the only one witnessing her vulnerable state, no matter how many people would see right through her.
You reached up to gently wipe away the tears that streaked down her cheeks, her freckles being in view, something that you missed so dearly, your touch light and tender as you held her—your world—in your hands.
"I wish I could've been there for you," you regretted, "I wish I was there every night, to wipe away the inevitable tears that would grace your face, to hold you in my arms every night.
Jenna shook her head, a smile tugging at her lips, "all that matters is that you're here with me." She chuckled. "Why are you here?"
"Booking a small plane ticket from New York to here was the smallest price to pay for the chance to hold you in my arms once again."
"You know those are expensive, y/n," she scolded you, yet her tone was playful. "How long are you planning to stay?"
You hummed, a grin curling on your lips, "As long as you want me to be here," you replied, "I can't go back when I don't have a return ticket."
Jenna leaned into your touch, her eyes closing as she savored the warmth of your embrace, she didn't know how much she took advantage of this until now. She was afraid you'll be leaving soon, even with all assurances, everything you'll be giving her wouldn't be enough to ease her fears of you departing from her soul once more.
"I love you, y/n. Too much."
"I love you too, Jenna. You know I was only a flight away."
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Y: i heard your voicemails, by the way. J: i sent voicemails?
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a/n: sorry if this request was so so so late!! i still have more requests in my inbox and they'll probably be delayed for a couple of days or maybe even weeks because of exams. buttt ill try to post as much as i can with requests and super sorry in advance to those who requested! ill be updating future posts in my masterlists
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haerni · 2 months
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COULD’VE BEEN ──── 이희승 . the past is a blur, reality was harsher than it usually is. how deep does one could ever love a person?
. . genre : exes w lingering feelings · fem reader hurt comfort time motifs · word count : 1869 . notes . . im in love with heeseung lately </3
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you love lee heeseung—you loved him, you did.
there was no denying it, he was an amazing boyfriend—perfect, even. your break up wasn't something you could call a bad ending, far from it. it was a mutual decision on both of you, it was something you both agreed on despite everything.
three years was all it took, three wonderful years of your life, three of it that you would come to treasure in the years to come. coming to terms of remaining as friends instead of strangers, your friends were even more bewildered. because really, who would still be friends with their ex? who would even want that?
“you still have feelings for him,” sunoo pointed out. “don’t deny it!” he shoots as quickly as you try to open your mouth with a quick retort with the high possibility of denying it, he surmised.
“i don’t have feelings for him, thank you very much.” you dismissed, getting back to what you were doing. “we’re really just friends now, acquaintances if you will.”
he narrows his eyes on you, not believing a word you say, but he lets it go with a puff shaking his head.
“you know what they say about exes staying friends. either you never loved each other at all, or you still have feelings—either way you’re not fooling me.” he says a matter of fact, helping himself in your fridge taking the mint chocolate.
you find your friend’s deduction to be ridiculous.
sometimes you catch yourself thinking of how he's doing. is he eating well? still staying up late until dawn because of his games? winning his league games? a small smile makes its way to your face at the same memories you share, somehow a bittersweet taste comes with it, yet it's still tucked away somewhere where your other moments lie, shaking your head away from it as quickly as it came. letting the thought simmer away to the backs of your mind.
lee heeseung was a fond memory you keep, but nonetheless he was just a memory still.
love was something you held for lee heeseung before, you don't really know what to call it now. maybe you wouldn't love someone for a long time as you have loved lee heeseung.
after all, what you knew as your greatest love was too great to be forgotten at all.
love was bound to find its way to you again, heeseung thinks.
you were like a force of nature that comes like you belong to everything, to every good little thing heeseung can ever name of. like everything was made to be the way it is just for you
—and somehow he also used to believe he was also made just for you.
that was before the fallout. now he believes that maybe after pining over you for many years and being your friend just the same, maybe this was where he should've always been. not to hold you like lovers do, not to kiss you as much as a friendship does not require, and definitely not to have you in any way that would be deemed more than what relationship you had returned to.
just friends. nothing more, nothing less.
it's useless, though. the glass in his hands is cold. misery was rather more of a warm company to heeseung, too familiar even. the lights at the bar were dimmed down adding more somber to the mood, and it is like the universe is playing some sort of twisted tricks on him. just to remind how hollow it is, how the world was actually big, it's too cold—it's lonely.
everything was becoming too much and not enough all the same.
drinking was never a good idea, it never was for heeseung. you'd always tell him that he gets so lost in it that he forgets just how many he downs and it leaves him away into the night with a smile and fits of giggles that are contagious and slurred words that he always tries to utter.
it's stupid, he was stupid.
but atleast he had you then, the one who would take care of him if he has one of too many or maybe crawl up into his lap when he's gaming away into the night and you'd just do it because you'd rather have his warmth near you than settle with the thought of having him in the same room. or times when you would just run up to him and like it's engraved in his veins to have you in his arms and hold you like forever was never enough of a time to describe how much he wants you. forever was too less of a time, a life with you would be more and to those other lives he will get to have you seems more promising.
forever is too much of a word for lee heeseung. if your lives were to part, may he always find you in the next and the comings. for him to never take another heart that does not belong to you. may lee heeseung love you to every time, to be born in the same universe as you, the same time, the same place.
three lifetimes, three wonderful lives you both had, and he thinks it is simply not enough.
he begs the heavens to let him be made just for you once more. because forever in one, will never be something to call what you have.
eternity suits you better, he thinks.
the night strolls, the stars are twinkling with the hopes of catching an eye.
this night feels a little more dreadful than the last. the drink he had down a few minutes ago keeps him warm in the night, setting itself in his stomach. heeseung has spent away the after hours this way, a routine that has eaten him alive to its core. it's not an ideal lifestyle, but he continues anyway.
he strolls without a place in mind, after all he has lost home once and wherever you are, his heart resides.
you are everything that heeseung has prayed for.
as familiar buildings meet his eyes and it brings back some memories he had kept away. treacherous. suddenly he finds himself in your street, a few blocks away from where you are. he can knock, he can ask you, he can stay, but he was a stranger altogether. so, the best thing heeseung takes rather than doing all of those things? was to sober up and leave.
mortality has never been kind to him. and everything he has kept in his heart was torn from its home and never to be returned like the sands that slithers away from the storm.
and he had begged at everything that would hear him. because the sand had gone out of the hourglass too soon than what he had always hoped for. time has never been his friend, after all, what time would be fond of something going against it? fate was too cruel to you. but you had embraced it just the same.
how could he ever subject you to the same fate once more? a string tied to you or not, he would rather see you with the colors of life.
and as if this time—for once, mercy has taken pity on him. because as his heel turns he hears the front door of your home, and he shouldn't look, he shouldn't stop, he should go. but you're just still you, right? the always loveable you.
“heeseung?”
oh how he has missed your voice.
against his very judgement he turns around.
there you are by the porch of your home wrapped in a blanket protecting you from the chills of the night and you seem comfortable, you always are. he stops just as his mind tells him the opposite (how could lee heeseung ever say no to your very being?).
and he couldn't stop—heeseung has loved you for a very long time and it feels like it's the only language he can speak to answer your call.
you descend down on your stairs, with a small shy walk on your feet towards him. he feels dizzy, have you always been this pretty?
he tries to say something, anything, but you seem to knock the air out of his chest every time, he releases a breath he's been holding, “hey.”
if you knew better you think heeseung seemed to be full of life when he is with you, like a flower who basks in the sun. you don't know what to say to him, is there any words to describe whatever you were feeling? he knew everything about you, he read you like a diary he has memorized all his life, when words fail you, heeseung comes to answer it.
you couldn't really remember now why you broke up, too many talks, too many faults, too many problems that pile up as time wanes. but you missed him, you miss him too much now to remember why.
“it’s cold,” he begins. its obvious, but what could he possibly tell you?
it's weird now, his eyes are still the same and yet you find yourself wanting it just the same, “yeah, it is.”
silence passes you, it's not uncomfortable, it's not heavy—you're relieved.
“i should probably go.” he should, but is it a sin to say you want him to stay? you pursed your lips in contempt, you should say something.
heeseung may claim to be someone who keeps his words, but right now his feet feel heavy, like his anchored to where he stands—in front of you. he waits for you to utter anything to him, a small hope of you stopping him. to make it feel it was okay to want you like this, to be in your presence.
the silence beckoned you to speak before you can even think of it. “it’s already late..” it's embarrassing, almost as if you were too left open in his eyes again, “..you can stay, if you'd like.”
a second clock and a pin drop, heeseung adorned a soft smile on his lips and as if he was on the same wavelength as you he utters words he thought he couldn't ever tell you, “i missed you.”
“i know,” and it's not obnoxious, it's a truth that you know well, its a fact that you know deep in your bones, “i missed you too.”
and everything was happening in the blink of an eye, his arms are around you and he breathes your scent in. despite the blanket around you, his warmth burns more and you love it—some things just never change.
lee heeseung will never meet what could’ve been, would’ve been, what should’ve been you in that lifeline. your first life together would always be a mystery to the both of you. he misses you, more than he remembers.
he hopes he doesn't lose you again.
“i’ve got a lot to pine about. i’ve got a lot to live without. so rest well, hm? we’ll see each other again.”
—excerpt from (1500’s), A Hundred Years And A Lifetime, letters of Evan Lee to his wife by a Nameless Laureate poet.
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Twisted Wonderland Characters Signing Your Shirt
So when I was in primary school, on the very last day of term, the year 6 leavers would sign each other's white school polo shirts with felt tips as a sort of parting gift before we all went our separate ways to secondary school. I thought it might be cool if the reader shared this tradition with her friends at NRC.
Warning: I write reader as female
I literally had no idea what to write for bat grandpa and Silver so I just didn’t write them. In return, I’ll add snippets of Trein, Crewel, Vargas and Sam
Word Count: 8k+
Masterlist
Despite the comfort you felt with your friends in Twisted Wonderland and the obvious collective effort that your fellow students showed in making you feel at home in this strange new world, sometimes it did strike you just how different your current abode was - well, barring the universal use of magic that was so common that even infants were capable of it, of course. Such instances when your geographical displacement was most apparent was when you were reminded that there seemed to be little to no shared holidays between your world and this. For example, whilst Halloween did exist here, the concept of Christmas, Easter and Valentine’s Day didn’t - and neither did Mother’s or Father’s Day or even the smaller holidays like International Best Friends’ Day. It made you wonder if this world had any holidays or traditions that yours didn’t. This exact conversation starter was how you found yourself sitting cross legged on the floor of Ramshackle with your fellow first year friends as you all discussed different traditions that you’ve all partaken in (when in fact you were supposed to be using this timeframe to be studying for an upcoming assessment). 
“You know,” you mused out loud, “my primary school had this tradition where on the very last day, all of the leavers would sign each others’ shirts.”
“Really?” Deuce looked at you with sparkling wide eyes, and leaned forward slightly, as if he was hanging onto every word you said and was careful that he would miss a single syllable that came out of your mouth despite sitting less than two feet away from you.
“Yep. It was basically as a parting momentum we’d give each other to show our support even if we are parting ways and may never see each other again. I still have mine hanging in my wardrobe at home. By the end of the day, it was covered in so many felt tip marks that it was more colourful than white,” you gave a nostalgic smile at the memory of your eleven year old self being surrounded by your laughing and tearful classmates as they decorated each other’s polo shirts (and even some a lot of skin) with well wishes, signatures and drawings that were partly sweet, partly adoringly offensive and partly completely random and out there that you had no idea of what to make of them. It did make you wonder how they were currently doing and then it hit you - you had no way of knowing. Atleast back home, whenever you found yourself revisiting your younger years, you had the ability of picking up your phone and finding out for yourself. But here - here in this world where your friends and family didn’t exist, where your life had about as much substance as a black hole until that fateful day you appeared in front of that dark mirror - you had absolutely no way of connecting to anyone you once knew. You didn’t even have any pictures or mementos from your world to remind yourself that they were even real to begin with. How long would you be able to cling on to your memories and -
“Y/N,” Jack's voice pierced through the blurry memories as sharply and swiftly as Rook’s arrow, shattering every thought like glass and every fragment of them fell and dissolved into nothing until you found yourself out of your head and sitting in your dorm’s living room floor with Grim on your lap and your friends nearby. His face contorted with concern the second he noticed your smile going from fond to bittersweet, “are you okay?”
Were you?
“I-”
“Why don’t we do that?” Epel blurted out.
You looked at him in confusion as Jack and Deuce glared at him for his interruption (but, honestly, you were very grateful for that), tilting your head to the side, “huh?”
“The-the shirt signing thing. I never did it when I left elementary. It sounds like fun?” he looked at the other boys, “whatdya fellas think?”
“I’m in,” Ace stretched out his arms.
“Me too,” Deuce said immediately after, sitting up a little straighter.
“I’ll-I’ll join in as well,” Jack stuttered out, “just ‘cause you guys are. Not-not because it sounds fun or anything, alright.”
“Hmm,” Sebek scoffed, crossing his arms and looking down on the rest of the group with an expression that says ‘I’m very much interested but I’m not going to say that because I’m a tsundere who pledges allegiance to my large commissioned portrait of Waka-sama every morning’, “I suppose these human customs seem adequate enough for me to partake in them. If at least to ensure that you do not tread on a path that could cause a disturbance to Lord Malleus, as is my duty as his knight.”
Ace rolled his eyes, “sure, pal.”
“Everyone wait,” Grim yelled out, “I should go first. As Y/N is my minion, she should receive the honour of getting The Great Grim’s mark first.”
When Ace and Deuce looked like they were about to argue, you silenced them with an, “alright, Grim, you can go first.”
GRIM
Since he’s so small, he couldn’t really reach that high, even though you were sitting down
He signed ‘to my favourite minion, from the great grim. P.S buy me more tuna’ at the bottom of your shirt near the hem of your shirt
He added a little simple drawing of a fish and a doodle of a small tin of tuna next to his words
Since he didn’t wear any clothes, you signed your own name with a cute little heart on the dangly end of the ribbon that made up the bow around his neck.
ACE TRAPPOLA
He and Deuce played rock, paper, scissors to decide who should go next
He had to be reminded by everyone not to write anything too big
“That means that I can barely write anything. You’re so short and small that half a sentence would take up half of your shirt,” he snarks with a teasing grin.
Deuce hit him over the head with an unimpressed look for that one
Good boy, Deuce
He uses one of his red pens to sign ‘your best friend and favourite person in the whole world who you like more than Deuce, Ace Trappola’ with a smiley face and a doodle of the ace of hearts card under under your collar, near your chest area before surveying his masterpiece and looking up at you with a smug wink
Deuce, hit him again
You signed your own name on his collar with a heart next to it
“A heart?” he wiggled his eyebrows at you, “are you trying to tell me something, prefect?”
DEUCE!
DEUCE SPADE
Baby boy is so scared
He’s so worried that he’ll ruin your shirt with something you won’t like that his hands are shaking
Protect him
After you reassure him that you’ll love whatever he does (Ace: not as much as mine, though 😏) he nods, eyes burning with determination as he braves himself and picks up a dark blue biro
He slowly and steadily writes out, in his neatest handwriting ‘you’re my best friend and I can’t imagine NRC without you. You always make me happy, Deuce Spade” with a little coloured-in spade doodle next to his name on the stomach part of your shirt (because the mere notion of idea of going any higher made his head spin and face burn)
The entire time he was diligently writing, he was looking at his handiwork with the most concentrated expression you had seen, with his eyebrows furrowed with great attention and care whilst his tongue stuck out slightly from between his teeth
He does know that this is supposed to be a fun little activity, right? He knows that he’s not signing his last will and testament (of course he does. In his mind, this was way more important)
“That’s great, Deuce. I love it.” you smiled softly at him when he finished
He perks up at the praise before blushing and looked down, his pink face conveying how bashfully pleased he was that he didn’t mess up
He’s so going to tell his mother about this during their nightly phone calls
“Thank you, Y/N,” he shyly smiles back at you
You place your own signature on his shirt as he looks on at you with still pink cheeks
You beam at him after punctuating your name with a small little hear
“You didn’t say anything about miiinnee ~”
FOR GOD’S SAKE, ACE-
JACK HOWL
No, his tail is most definitely not wagging in excitement when he approaches you with a gel pen in hand so shut up
No one said a word, wolfy
Writes a swift ‘keep up the good work. Jack Howl’
A simple wolf, our Jack is
Please ignore the red blossoming along his cheeks and nose and the still wagging tail as he doodles a little cactus next to his name
You give him a smile as you sign your own name on his shirt and add a little smiley face next to it
You can still see some red peeking out from under his hand as he covers the lower half of his face with his palm, his tail wagging like crazy 
You swear that you can hear a faint little “thank you”
EPEL FELMIER
“Hell, yeah! Move aside, losers, it’s my turn!”
*coughs and clears throat* “ahem, I mean - it’s my turn to sign your shirt, prefect.”
Uses his dark purple gel pen to sign his name and draws an apple next to it
Pretends that he isn’t elated to see your name on his shirt
Is planning to proudly wear that shirt to Vil’s etiquette lessons, propriety be damned
Is also whooping and punching the air the second he’s out of sight
SEBEK ZIGVOLT
He strides towards you all stiff and square-shouldered
Signs ‘Sebek Zigvolt, loyal knight and retainer of His Glorious Majesty Lord Malleus, the beloved and awe-inspiring fae prince of the noble kingdom of Briar Valley. It is he who I pledge my eternal loyalty and allegiance to and it is my greatest honour to die in his name.”
You had to stop him from writing a whole essay on your shirt (complete with book references) about the might of the esteemed prince who you once found sulking in the woods because Lilia ate all of his ice cream during a Call of Duty session with Idia
He loudly explains to you that it is of poor taste to allow a human to sully the uniform of the great Waka-sama’s dorm as it is unheard of for a knight to appear as anything less of perfection as his attire reflects the power of his future king-
Uh, alright crocodile boy but why are you leaning closer to me?
You sign your name really small on his shirt so that it’s not immediately visible and only those who know where it is find it.
He doesn’t know why his heart is beating much faster at the sight of this magicless human’s name. Clearly he has contracted an illness. Quick, he must go to Lilia at once and remedy the issue lest Lord Malleus finds out.
CATER DIAMOND
Once you bid your friends farewell, you, Grim, Ace and Deuce, make your way to Heartslabyul for that afternoon’s unbirthday party
The students were still setting up the tables and food in the rose garden so the dorm leader and vice dorm leader weren’t present
Cater senses the four of you approaching as he finishes painting the last of the roses red and his eyes immediately dart to your shirt
“Hey, Y/N-chan. What’s with the get-up?”
You explain how it’s a tradition in your world to sign each other’s shirts and how your friends wanted to do it for themselves
“Aww, no fair,” he pouts at you, “Cay-kun wants to join in on the fun too.”
You offer him a pen, “you’re more than welcome to add your signature, Cater-senpai.”
He grins at you and writes a funky ‘Cater Diamond’ with doodles of the cartoony smiling four diamonds on his phone case on your shirt. Underneath his name he adds his magicam and other social media usernames.
“Well, Y/N-chan?” he sing-songs, twirling the pen around with his index and middle fingers the same way a drummer would a drumstick, “what do you think?”
“I love it, Cater-senpai,” you reply happily
He joyfully pats your head, “anything for my favourite underclassman”
Ace and Deuce: we’re here too, you know 🧍🧍
“Now smile for the camera,” he chirps, holding out his phone to take a selfie of him gesturing towards the area of your shirt with his name on it 
After you quickly jot down your own name on his collar before running off to help with the party preparations, he takes a selfie of himself and then spends a bit more time gazing upon your smiling face on his screen before making a post
#HangingOutWithMyFavouriteUnderclassmen #ShesTheBest #WhenACuteGirlAsksYouToSignSomethingYouSignIt #SheLooksReallyPrettyWithMyNameOnHerThough #ImNeverWashingThisShirtAgain
TREY CLOVER
Comes out before Riddle to make sure that everything is set
And to see if you’re Ace and Deuce are here
Immediately notices the shirt and wants in on it
Uses one of his edible pens that he just happens to be carrying to write his name with a cupcake and clover drawn next to it
“Here you go, Y/N,” he says as he gives you the ‘I’m the responsible and reliable senpai even though you and I both very well know that I am capable of causing the most chaos here’ smile
Pats your head after you return the favour
RIDDLE ROSEHEARTS
You’re the first thing Riddle notices the moment he enters
Has to take a second to gather his bearings when he sees you smiling when you notice his arrival
At this point he’s gotten used to the teasing smile Cater shoots him when he’s in your proximity but that doesn’t mean he has to DO IT EVERY TIME HE’S GOT A REPUTATION
In Riddle’s head: Y/N’s here 😊 I must greet her with the grace every gentleman must have when they meet a lovely lady like her. Perhaps I should point out how wonderful it is for her to join us. Or personally escort her to a seat as I comment on how happy her presence here has made me.
What Riddle says: What has happened to your shirt 🤨
Don’t worry, Riddle. You tried your best
You apologetically tell him how it’s your fault since Ace and Deuce were trying to cheer you up and then Cater and Trey wanted to join them so you’ll take full responsibility if they broke any rules
“Well,” Riddle states primly, “there’s no rule forbidding it but bear in mind that I shall not accept you making a habit of unkempt attire. As Heartslabyul students and prefects both you and them are expected to possess a certain standard of decorum.”
“Does that decorum include personally fixing the prefect's tie in the middle of a busy public corridor in broad daylight?” Ace asks innocently
Riddle shoots him a sharp glare as he puffs up with anger
Before he can open his mouth, Trey swoops in to save Ace’s neck and Riddle’s vocal chords as he suggests that the unbirthday party should commence and then tells Cater to stop filming and put his phone down
The entire time you swear that you can feel someone gazing at you when you aren’t watching but every time to turn to look in Riddle’s direction, you notice that he’s looking elsewhere whilst Cater and Trey give each other knowing looks
When everyone has finished cleaning up afterwards, Riddle catches you and Grim on your way back and politely asks you if you could join him in the common room
You agree and set Grim down so he can trouble Ace and Deuce
When you get there he stiffly stammers something about wanting to know more about the shirt situation
How someone can be both poised and shy you have no idea but it’s adorably endearing
After you explained how it’s something friends do back in your world, he gets this contemplative look on his face as he looks down and twiddles his fingers before shyly asking if it would be alright if you permitted him to sign your shirt as well
Once you give an enthusiastic reply he gets out one of his fancy rich boy fountain pens and elegantly signs his name somewhere near your shoulder blades, his face burning the entire time
“If it’s alright with you, I could do the same back,” you offered, “I signed everyone else’s shirts but since you’re the dorm leader, I’d understand that it would be improper for me to-”
“No!” he blurts out, startling both you and himself. The red hue on his face gets even darker once he realised what he had just done and clears his throat before continuing in a tone that is much more controlled yet still a tad shaky, “no, I-I’d be honoured if you wanted to do so.”
So you take the pen he offered you from his outstretched hand and sign your name on his collar like you did the others
“Well, I’ll see you soon, Riddle-senpai. I hope you take care,” you smile at him before bowing your head slightly and walking out of the room to rescue Heartslabyul from whatever Grim had done
Riddle stared at the doorway from which you left from for a considerable amount of time before looking down at the hand where your fingers grazed his when you reached for the pen
He smiled slightly before shaking his head and composing himself. Then he marched out to supervise his dormmates
RUGGIE BUCCHI
This sneaky little hyena catches you during one of his errands 
He finds you on his way to deliver lunch to a certain lazy lion
Was about to pawn off the job to you but catches the names on your shirt before he hears a lightbulb go off in his head
“Shi shi shi. It seems like our prefect has been busy.”
Without even asking for an explanation, he asks if he could sign it
Throws in some hopeful puppy eyes to ensure you say yes
You don’t need to do that Ruggie. To quote my non-twst friend when I showed hyena boy’s picture to her: I would commit arson for you
Honestly he’s only doing this 60% because he wants to and 40% because he knows that it would annoy Leona
You hand him the pen you have been carrying and he scribbles on his name with a picture of a sprinkle covered doughnut next to it
He then asks you to do the same to him
You comply, noticing how his tails wags excitedly behind him
You then offer to bring Leona his lunch to give him a break, which he hastily agreed to 
After you leave he wonders if he could sell this shirt to one of your simps before immediately scrapping that idea since he decides it’s not worth it this time
LEONA KINGSCHOLAR
It took you a while to shake him ‘awake’
I say ‘awake’ in inverted commas because the second he hears footsteps in the botanic garden his ears perk up and he tries to determine if the scent from the incoming person is yours. If it is, he’s wide awake
But he’s also a jerk so he’s not going to make this easy for you
He’s internally smirking whenever he hears you’re irritated little huffs as you try to wake him up
The he considers that he should maybe throw you a bone so he opens his eyes only to see the names of your first year friends , those uptight Heartslabyul students and his own second in command on you
Something about that does not sit right with him and he has to fight back a possessive growl
At least he can’t see the names of that stuck up beauty queen and - god forbid - that stupid lizard
“You some to have something on you, Herbivore,” he drawls as he lazily flicks his eyes towards your face
Like you did to everyone else, to explain how it’s a thing in your world to sign your classmates’ shirts
At this he gets up, whilst maintaining eye contact, and takes one stride so that he’s right in front of you
Excuse me sir, we like to respect personal space here
Unless you’re a Twisted Wonderland character then no we don’t
“Does that mean you marked other people with your name?” he asks you with a tone that you can’t quite put your finger on but can definitely tell has hints of annoyance
You just look at him in silence, completely off guard by his proximity and out of the blue question
“Well?” he leans down closer to you
“Oh, um, yeah. I guess”
He just hums in reply before holding out his palm
You just look down at it before giving him a perplexed look
“Pen,” he says, “now.”
You place your pen in his hand before he immediately crouches down and writes ‘LEONA KINGSCHOLAR’ in block letters that seemed to be a bit larger than everyone else’s names
He holds out your pen, “your turn.”
“Oh, okay”
The minute you finish writing your name you he stands back up at his full height, green eyes gleaming with mirth
“You know, Herbivore,” he holds up your chin so you get a full view of his smirking face, “I can think of plenty of other ways I could mark my territory if you're ever up for it.”
He gives your head a pat, remarking “you know where to find me” before yawning and sauntering off to god knows where with one hand in the front pocket of his trousers and his tail swinging lazily behind him
You just blink at his retreating figure in confusion
“Oookaayy,” you drone out to yourself and then you make your way out of Savanaclaw as Grim mutters something about weird predators
JADE AND FLOYD LEECH
“KOEBI-CHAN! :D” 
Oh dear, it seems as if Floyd has found you for his daily accosting
You know that there is no way you can run from an eel so you just brace yourself with closed eyes as you hear the grunts, groans and shouts of several students being pushed out of the way as Floyd makes his way towards you for his completely necessary squeezing the life out of you hugging session
You open your eyes the second you feel those arms glomp you as you give the eel twin a smile, “hello, Floyd-senpai.”
Out of the corner of your eye you can see Jade casually strolling along the path that his brother had cleared with a pleasant smile on his face, completely ignoring the still groaning students on the corridor’s floor
“Good afternoon, dear prefect,” he greets you politely as you feel Floyds arms wrap tighter around your waist as he nuzzles his face into your neck, “I see that you’ve run into quite a few students on your way here - if your shirt is anything to go by.”
“Huh,” Floyd lets go of you and notices Riddle’s name at the back of your shirt. He then turns you around to inspect the front of your shirt only to be met with the names of all of these bottom feeders 
“Hey,” he pouts at you accusingly, crossing his arms in displeasure, “how come koebi-chan let goldfish and crabby and sea lion and all these other fish write all over her and not us. I wanna write on koebi-chan too.”
Jade gave a fond sigh at his brother’s whining before turning to you with a gentlemanly smile that barely concealed the grin of a predator, “I must say, dear prefect, I’ve got to agree with my brother here. It does seem very unfair for you to allow others to enjoy this event and not us. I feel rather hurt.”
“Yeah, yeah,” Floyd nods, “koebi-chan should let us write on her.”
“And what luck,” Jade piped up, taking a pen out of his pocket (though you had the strange suspicion that it was used less for writing and more for some weird torture technique that he and his brother liked to dish out), “it appears that I have a pen in my possession. Now, you will allow us to do so, right prefect?”
You knew for a fact that even if your brain decided to take a holiday and leave you to enter the boundless void of nothingness that inhabited your mental stability you would not even think to refuse him
“Alright then,” you said slowly and both of their faces lit up
“Me first, me first,” Floyd gleefully snatched the pen from his twin’s hand and bounded over to you, writing his name in big bold letters on your right sleeve. Underneath it he drew a picture of his eel form and a cartoony shrimp with arrows pointing towards both figures saying ‘ME!! :)’ AND “SHRIMPY!”
Jade then took the pen from his brother and wrote his own name on your left sleeve with a drawing of an anatomy correct shiitake mushroom under it. He then labeled different the different structures with their biologically correct scientific names
“Now write on us,” Floyd demanded, so you took Jade’s pen and did just that.
After he pocketed his pen, he turned to the other eel with a mischievous grin, “You know, Floyd. I believe Azul would love to see our dear prefect. What do you think?”
Floyd matched his brother’s expression with an even more unhinged one of his own, “yes, yes. Let’s go.”
And with that, the both of them each take a firm hold of each one of your shoulders and began to stir you to the Mostro Lounge, paying no attention to Grim, who was yelling at them about how it was his lunch time
AZUL ASHENGROTTO
Due to spending almost his entire life with the Leech twins, Azul was fairly accustomed to their antics - which was why he didn’t seem the least bit perturbed to the sound of the door to the VIP room slamming against the wall and Floyd’s cheerful voice loudly exclaiming “WE’RE HERE”. 
He just sighed and continued to finish the sentence he was writing before looking up to greet him when he did a double take when he sway you’re slightly embarrassed self give a small smile and wave from where Floyd had you rooted with the way his arm rested over your shoulders
“Ah yes, Floyd what is-PREFECT??!!”
No his voice did not crack at the end, thank you very much
Jade gracefully stepped into the room, “Azul, Floyd and I were just admiring the prefect’s shirt and thought that you would appreciate it if we brought her here to show you ourselves.”
“Yes, what Jade said,'' Floyd nodded happily, “Jade and I both wrote our names on koebi-chan as well, see. And she wrote on us. Isn’t that great?”
Despite clearing his throat, Azul’s voice still was choked when he let out a surprised, “yes, that does look rather nice.”
The four of you spent the next minute standing in awkward silence. The eels were directing their shark-like grins on a red and embarrassed-looking Azul who seemed to look completely stumped and you just stood there having no idea what to do
“Well,” you started when the silence got too much, “I’m so sorry for barging in on you like this Azul-senpai and interrupting your work. It seems like you are really busy in the middle of something important so I’ll just head back and-”
“Wait, prefect,” Azul pushed his glasses up his nose and made his way towards you with a pen in hand, “If-if you would allow me, I would love to add my name onto your shirt.”
“Go right ahead,” you reply
Now he’s written his name hundreds of times, with the business that he runs, but for some reason him signing his name directly onto the clothing that your wearing has his heart leaping and twisting in ways that he’s never felt before
He’s lying. He’s felt that many, many times before and strangely every instance has occurred in your presence
Once he’s finished he gives you a look that very clearly expresses that he wants to ask you something
“I could sign your shirt as well if that’s okay?” you half offered half asked, thinking you might know what he wanted
He gives you a shocked look, a rosy hue painting his nose and cheeks, before clearing his throat once more
“I can’t say that I would mind terribly if you did that. Of course,” he gives you his signature businessman octopus grin, “if you would much rather sign your name on a contract, I would be more than happy to oblige.”
“Yeah, no thank you,” you deadpan. You turn around, “if that’s it then-”
“Wait,” he grabs ahold of your wrist, “actually prefect, I would very much like that.”
Your face softens and you sign your name onto his collar and left the fish mafia to practice their Godfather impressions or whatever they did behind closed doors when they weren’t dealing with the poor unfortunate souls of NRC
Unbeknownst to you, Azul immediately changed out of that shirt and kept it next to his third draft of that marriage contract he had been preparing
KALIM AL-ASIM
It was after you left Octavinelle when you remembered that Kalim had invited you to a party at Scarabia so off to his dorm you went
Almost ten seconds after you enter, you hear a shout of “Y/N!” coming from above you
“God?” you mutter under your breath as you look up and find the resident sunshine boy of the campus beaming down at you from his magic carpet
You happily give them both a joyful and hearty wave, “HI KALIM-SENPAI! HI CARPET!”
The two of them descend towards you. Kalim jumps off when it reaches a few centimetres above the ground before tackling you into a hug that was filled with unbridled merriment. Carpet, feeling lonely, latched onto the both of you as well, wrapping its tassels around the two of you and squeezed in its own version of a hug.
The two of you laughed at its enthusiasm until it let go and Kalim pulled back
“Y/N, I’m so glad you’re here,” his smile filled with pure sunshine never once left nor faltered as he looked at you with all of the joy in the world, “you’re going to love it. Everyone’s dancing and Jamil made kunafah which is really really tasty and I’m sure you’ll enjoy it and we can go for a magic carpet ride as well and - woah, your shirt looks so cool!”
You giggle at his amazement, “thank you, Kalim-senpai. In my home world, it’s a tradition to sign your classmates’ shirts when you leave school so
“Wait, you’re not leaving are you?” he gives you the saddest tearful golden retriever puppy-eyed look you had ever seen and you instantly hated yourself for being the monster that caused it, “please say you’re not. We haven’t even done half of the things I wanted to do with you. Please don’t say you’re going.”
“No, no, no,” you wave your hand erratically to show that you were most certainly not leaving, “I swear that I’m not going anywhere, Kalim-senpai. I just mentioned that to everyone and they wanted to sign my shirt for fun, that’s all. I’m staying right here, pinky promise.”
Of course, you had no way of leaving this world, what with the headmaster being a lazy idiot who makes empty promises but you didn’t say a word about that part
Kalim smiled and intertwined his pinky with your outstretched one
(Meanwhile carpet sulked because he wanted to join in on the pinky promise but he had no pinkies to promise with)
“So,” he gives you a hopeful look, “does that mean that I can sign as well?”
“Of course you can,” you smile at him.
He beams back at you, holds your hand and scampers towards his room
After bringing you inside, he rummages through his drawers until he procures some limited edition ultra deluxe sparkly golden sharpie pen that you know costs like enough to feed you for a week
He skips back towards you and signs ‘KALIM!’ all big and glittery on your back with a bunch of stars and hearts surrounding it and a smiley face to dot the exclamation mark
He then giddily hands you the pen and asks you to sign his clothes as well
You hesitate because there is no way that you are going to stain a piece of clothing that has enough zeros in its price to pay for your entire neighbourhood back home
But his hopeful/pleading face was too much for you to refuse so you did as you were asked
He now wants to buy an entire store’s worth of clothes just so that the two of you could write your names all over them
He also is so happy that he wants throw another party in your honour and hopefully make an event of having the two of you sign each others clothes
Not going to lie, he’ll probably commission the best painters in the Scalding Sands to make a giant portrait of his shirt so that he can hang it up in his rooms (no that’s not a typo) and show it to his parents, his siblings, his aunts and uncles, his cousins, his pet elephants, his pet peacocks, that tiger he was going to ask for his birthday…
He just wants to keep the memory of this moment forever
“Woah, Y/N, that looks great! Hey, I have a bunch of other clothes in my wardrobe that you can sign, I’ll go get them-”
You had to stop him before he did something that would make Jamil pop a blood vessel or consider alcoholism (again) so you asked him if he could take you to where Jamil was
Thankfully, he agreed and happily lead you to the kitchens
JAMIL VIPER
Jamil had no idea what to feel when Kalim barged into the kitchens
On the one hand, the Scarabia kitchens were his safe haven, the one place where he could be alone without his airheaded master coming in to cause further trouble due to the fact that Kalim is forbidden from stepping foot in it so his annoyance at seeing that bright face in here was more than welcome
On the other hand, however, Kalim had brought you along. The diamond among the soiled charcoal that were his peers, the coolness of his eyes that never failed to put him at ease no matter how unreasonable Kalim’s never ending laundry list of problems became so he did admit that he felt much more relieved when he saw your smiling face pop in to say hello in that enchantingly sweet lilt
But then Kalim dragged you in and showed off all of the names that had been written on your shirt for that bitter python of annoyance that he keeps chained and shackled in his gut to start coiling around in displeasure - only for it to start hissing and biting at his stomach when Kalim happily pointed out his own name standing out on your back and your name on his shirt, it’s teeth sinking into every vein it can find and contaminating his bloodstream with that pungent envy
On the outside, he regarded all of this with the same cool and unwavering expression he usually wore but on the inside he was raging at how happily you wore everyone’s names - how you wore Kalim’s name - whilst casting him to the shadows.
He simply reminded Kalim that he was not allowed in the kitchens and he had a party to host so it was best for him to leave
Kalim turned to you and was about to ask you to come with him when you told him that you’ll stay and help Jamil and you promise to dance with him later
“Alright then Y/N, see you later,” and then he skipped away, a cloud of sparkles and flowers following him
You approached Jamil, who appeared to be a bit more tense than usual and placed your hand on his shoulder
He immediately stopped, took a breath and turned to you
“You know,” you smiled at him, “I didn’t just come here to help you cook, though I would very much like to.”
He raised an eyebrow at you, “is that so, prefect? Then pray tell, why did you come here.”
“Well, you see, all of my dear friends have decided to write their names on my shirt after I explained that it was a tradition where I’m from and now that I’m here, I realise that I’m one name short.”
“Is that true?” he mused, his lips twitching ever so slightly
You nodded with the gravitas of a judge giving a sentence, “yes, it is. And you see, Jamil-senpai, the person whose name that I’m talking about happens to be someone who would never go out of his way to do something that he thinks might not be wanted - even if the receiver would very much want it - so the idea of him offering his signature like everyone else seems to be out of the question.”
“What are you trying to say, prefect?” he sighed and put his head down so that he can hide his blush by pretending to rub his temples
“What I’m saying, Jamil-senpai, is that I would absolutely love it if you wrote your name on my shirt. It just doesn’t seem right without you and having you there would delight me to no end,” you reply, taking out the pen you’ve been carrying in your pocket and holding it out to him expectantly
‘How troublesome,’ he mentally sighs, though the thought was directed not towards you but to the pleasant feeling of warmth that enveloped him whenever you were near.
Regardless, he takes the pen and signs your shirt in a manner that appears to be annoyed and rushed but anyone can clearly see that the calligraphy of his name is definitely carefully thought out with strokes that look more like artwork than a teenage boy’s signature
“So, um,” you start, “you can say no if you’d like but would you like it if I signed yours back?”
He shrugged, “I see no reason why not?”
Don’t let his perpetually controlled voice fool you, he is internally punching the air and screaming with elation at the prospect to you placing your signature on him
Usually he would hate to have another's name anywhere near him. He was already cursed with the invisible shackles of the Al-Asim family, he didn’t want any other form of ownership to strip the miniscule amount of control he had in his life. However, the idea of him belonging to you only filled him with bliss instead of the accustomed disdain
‘Oh, prefect,’ he thought, internally smirking to himself as he continued with the preparations of Kalim’s feast with your assistance, ‘the next time you want me to leave my mark on you, I may not be as gentle.’
ROOK HUNT
You swear you take one step out of the mirror chamber and into the corridor before you find yourself face to face with Tamaki Suoh’s long lost cousin, who appeared out of frickin’ nowhere
“Petite mademoiselle trickster,” he cheers, “it has come to my attention that you are going around, letting the students write on your clothing and thus I must implore you to allow me the honour of joining them in this ceremonious ritual.”
Ritua - does he think that you’ve started a cult?!
Although, to be fair, that would be the least weirdest thing that’s happened in this school
You could’ve sworn you saw a bunch of Savanaclaw students standing in a circle and chanting so cultists are not completely out of line
And Crowley’s whole bird mask and making his students wear robes does seem very cult-y
Not to mention Sebek’s whole existence
Deciding to ignore the second part of Rook’s words (a standard procedure when it comes to students dealing with the huntsman) you hand him your pen
“Please allow me to write a sonnet so that I may pour out my awe at your splendorous beauty”
Yeah, you shut that one down hard
“Ah, I see. You’d much prefer a villanelle!”
No, Rook
A ballad or an Ode?
This is going to be another Sebek situation, isn’t it?
He did end up writing something
You must admit, you were impressed that he was able to conjure up a rhyming couplet dedicated to your beauty and general existence
In iambic pentameter no less
Now if only you could get him to stay still and quiet enough for you to write on your name
Great Seven, is he crying?
I’m flattered that there tears of joy but all I did was write my name on your shirt
I’m pretty sure my handwriting looked nicer on that contract that Leona turned to ash you really don’t need to praise the heavens for my existence 
Oh good, Vil-senpai, you’re here 
Your huntsman is broken
I know that he most probably came like this but it’s a bit unnerving
VIL SCHOENHEIT
Vil was strutting through the hallways like NRC was a pageant and his catwalk was going to be crowned as the winner when he noticed Rook singing (yes, actually singing) your praises to you whilst you just looked at him like most people do
“Rook,” he called sharply, his high heels clicking through the corridor and the back of his royal purple robe effortlessly flaring out behind him, “I have been looking all over for you.”
“Roi du Poison!” he called out, “I was just engaging in the most splendid tradition with Petite mademoiselle trickster!”
“Ah, yes, Epel mentioned this during his etiquette lesson,” he looked down at the piece of your shirt that he was pinching between his perfectly manicured index finger and thumb, “whilst I understand the sentiment, I cannot believe you would allow these undeserving potatoes to tarnish your appearance like this.”
He huffs and pulls out a pen from one of his own pockets, “thankfully, I come prepared for situations like these. Honestly, what would you do without me? Be grateful that I’m here to save you from these unruly spudlings.”
He then signs his name onto you with complete precision, most probably from his years of experience as a renowned actor
“Now it would be unfitting for me as the dorm leader of Pomefiore to walk amongst these halls with ink stains on my uniform but I have a suitable substitute for you to use so that the criteria for your traditions have been met,” and with that he pressed an apple scented soft handkerchief into your palms
“Well,” he looked at you expectantly, “aren’t you going to sign it?”
“Oh, um, yes,” and you wrote your name on this obviously very expensive piece of cloth
“Wonderful,” Vil gave you an approving smile and took his handkerchief back before briskly turning around and walking away, calling out for his vice, “Rook!”
“Coming Roi du Poison!”
ORTHO SHROUD
You made your way to Ignihyde for your regularly scheduled gaming/anime watching session with the otaku shut in of the school
But of course you couldn’t do that without saying hi to his younger brother because not greeting Ortho when you enter the dorm of the Lord of the Underworld is a crime worthy of death
“Big sister Y/N!'' is the first thing you hear when you step into Idia’s dorm. The adorable android with flaming blue hair greeted you with stone-melting giddiness, “my scanners informed me that you have arrived! That’s great news! Big brother has been waiting for you to join us all day! In fact, my sensors picked up that his heart rate increased by 15% everytime I or he mentioned you!”
You giggled and pet the little robot’s head, “that’s nice, Ortho. Say, would you like to sign my shirt? All of my other friends have written their names on it and I would be very happy if you did too.”
“Write my name on big sister’s shirt?” Ortho’s eyes widened and he clapped with glee, “yes, yes, I would love to. Please wait a moment.”
You watched with part surprise part wonder as Ortho’s right hand transformed into a tiny laser
“Big brother has downloaded and programmed over a thousand different fonts into my database. Is there a style that you prefer?”
“Um, not really, Ortho,” you reply, “why don’t you choose?”
“Alright then, I’ll apply a random generator to select one for us.”
After doing that he floated towards you and wrote Ortho Shroud onto your back
Well, it was less ‘wrote’ and more lasered ink in straight lines to create letters the same way a laser printer would shoot ink to create an image
“Thank you, Ortho, I really appreciate it,” you smiled at him, but then frowned, “though I don’t know if I can return the favour to you the same way I did to everyone else since you’re made of metal.”
“Hehe, it’s okay big sister,” he happily replies, “I’m sure big brother would be more than happy to have you write to him instead.”
IDIA SHROUD
Y/N’S COMING Y/N’S COMING Y/N’S COMING
If anyone were to ask what our resident technological genius was thinking about for last twenty minutes it would be that
You’d think that him knowing you for more than a few weeks, you rescuing him from his own overblot and learning his entire tragic anime backstory would prepare him for every time you come near him but Idia doesn’t work on the logic of normies
Can you blame him? You were like ultra SSR tier and he was so below you it wasn’t funny
Hey, at least he managed to beat that weird french blond guy with the bow and arrow in the fight over who got to be the leader of the Y/N fan club 
So when you and his brother, his two favourite people in the world, come into the sanctuary of his room with blinding smiles his heart does a one hit k.o
And what’s worse is that his body pillow is all the way over there on the bed so he can’t even sink his face into it for the comfort of darkness
And then when Ortho comes and says that you want him to sign your shirt and then do the same to you?
Well, the pink that was forming at the tips of his hair has erupted his flaming locks into a bright pink fuschia 
What kind of shoujo manga otome game special edition event is this
Okay, cool, Idia, cool
He takes one peek at you and then immediately covers his face with his palms as his hair grows pinker if that’s even possible
You tell him that you understand if he’s uncomfortable so it’s okay if he doesn’t want to do it
But, you see Y/N, he does
He would very much like to take part in this event
But his social stats are lower than the bottom of the ocean
And he doesn’t think he’ll be able to level up in the next two or three decades at least 
Seeing his brother’s internal plight, Ortho huffs at him to just do it
So he does it
Because he wants to, alright - not-not because he’s being shamed by his little brother
So he picks up one of his pens with a miniature funko pop of his favourite anime character on it and hastily signs his name without even looking 
Thankfully he signed on a free space on your back otherwise he would never show you his face again
You ask him if he wants you to do the same to him and he passes out
Sigh, Ortho activate the defibrillators 
MALLEUS DRACONIA
You meet Tsunotarou after the sun has set on Twisted Wonderland and you invite him inside of Ramshackle so that the two of you can share some tea you’ve prepared before you can start your nightly walk in the woods
He politely questions you on the state of your dress and you laugh and tell him all about how you mentioned a tradition back in your home world to your friends and how that evolved into a sort of scavenger hunt for signatures 
As delighted as he is that you seem to be enjoying yourself and as thankful as he is that you were able to surround yourself with people who lift your spirits and ease your homesickness, he couldn’t help but feel a dark cloud of dread invading his mind and questioning whether or not this was another occasion that he was not invited to
“Tsunotarou?” you speak up, and hold up the pen that had accompanied you throughout this whole ordeal, “would you like to sign your name as well.”
He gives you a pleasant smile as he takes a sip of his tea, “I suppose I could, Child of Man. But that begs the question.”
You tilt your head in confusion and he internally laughs at how endearing you look, “what question?”
“On how you would like me to sign,” he gives you a smug little grin, “names are very important to the fae, you see. They’re very powerful, as well. In fact, a human giving a fae their name without thinking is often considered an act of foolishness (ouch, you could sense that subtle dig at your initial meeting but, in your defence you were new to this world and the concept of fairies and magic in general, and you didn’t even know the guy). So I would need to ask you if you would rather have me sign as the crown prince, Malleus Draconia or as the Tsunotarou that you met wandering around in the woods near your abode?”
“Is there really a difference?” you pose a question of your own, “Tsunotarou is Malleus and Malleus is Tsunotarou. To me both are the same. I know the rumours of you being powerful aren’t unfounded - I mean, you fixed the entire VDC venue in a second and called it child’s play so I can only imagine how strong you are. But the thing is, when I look at you, I don’t really see some crown prince who can destroy an island in the blink of an eye. All I see is a friend that I enjoy being in the company of - even if he can be a bit odd at times.”
“Odd? How brave of you to describe the future king in such a way. I was right in stating that you have no fear,” he teased you, eyes twinkling with mirth, “very well, I shall accept your request.”
He signs his name on you with the grace and elegance you’d expect a prince would have
You feel a slightly electric tingle from where the pen touches your skin through the fabric of your shirt and you can’t help but wonder if he had cast some sort of enchantment where his name was.
Once he has completed he hands you your pen back and you smile back at him, “I trust you, Tsunotarou. Not just because you’re my friend but also because you were one of the few who truly made me feel welcome even before we even knew each other. Actually, I trust you so much that-
You beckon him towards you, causing him to lean closer towards you. You take the pen and sign your name right on the first patch of white that you can see and reach
-that I would give you my name a hundred times without even a second of hesitation.”
ALRIGHT, TEACHER SNIPPETS: The next day, you take the shirt that you had worn the previous day and carry it around in your hands around campus so that you could ask the teachers to sign their names
PROFESSOR DIVUS CREWEL looks down at all of the names with disdain and mutters something about ‘rowdy mutts slobbering around his pup’ and something about ‘neutering’ before signing his name on your shirt with a flourish
PROFESSOR TREIN looks at you fondly and gives you one of his tea biscuits before signing his name. 
COACH ASHTON VARGAS gives you a booming laugh and a hair ruffle as he gladly signs his name all big and loud with several exclamation marks and some reminder to always work out
MR SAM argues with his friends from the other side on whether or not he should add their names as well. Instead he just signs his name and draws a cute little skull next to it
P.S. Please note that, if given the opportunity, any one of the NRC boys would very gladly and willingly write their names directly onto your skin with no hesitation whatsoever.
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chuuyasheaven · 11 months
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"Bittersweet Torture"— Fyodor and Nikolai
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"You didn't know how to feel actually, they were edging you but also making you feel absolute pleasure. Fyodor was the one making the commands and Nikolai was acting them out. Basically, you were stuck with two sadists which were enjoying your bittersweetly torture."
Tags: Fyodor Dostoevsky, Nikolai Gogol / fem! Reader, rough sex?, voyeurism?, bondage, depression was CONSUMING me, fingering, pet names, slight praise, edging, nipple play, teasing, Nikolai cumming on you, might contain grammar errors, lazy, RUSHED, short?, etc.
Notes: excuse my (not so sudden) disappearance, depression was WAY to overwhelming, I'll just try to catch up!
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As your hands were tied above you, Nikolai was playing with your nipples, with Fyodor watching. You don't recall for how long this has been going on. It was crazy how good but yet unsatisfied you felt, they've taking parts of edging you in many ways watching you cry each time they deny your sweet release. With how sensitive you've gotten, even the nipple play could've made you cum. Your moans were quiet, they grew more desperate as Nikolai got rougher with your nipples. Even though you tried to be secret with another knot building up, it was quite obvious that you grew close. Just when you were almost there— "You can stop now, Nikolai. She's getting close again.", a smirk building up on their faces as you lost another orgasm in front of them.
"Hm, what should we do next?", Fyodor asked, Nikolai just giggled before suggesting his own idea. "How about I finger her? I want to feel her clench around them until her eyes roll back.", you already clenched around the thought of it. Even the way he said it with his darker voice. ". . P–please.", you muttered mindlessly, amusing Fyodor. "Hm, if that's what she wants, you may continue.", Nikolai nodded and already got to work on you. An whine escaped your throat when Nikolai let his finger enter inside you. He slowly trusted it in and out, barely doing anything actually, only to tease you. "Do you want me to add more, dove?", he asked you, you nodded almost immediately. "I think you should use your voice, my dear.", Fyodor spoke up, you obeyed and talked. "Yes, please, N–nikolai. .", you begged shyly. "Good girl,", Fyodor praised you as Nikolai complied to your wishes.
Nikolai's fingers hit all the right places, making you already dizzy with how good he was with this. All while Fyodor was watching the both of you with an smug look on his face. Once again, you got closer each time Nikolai's fingers made contact with your sweet spot, but Fyodor prevented your orgasm again. "She's close to cumming again.", Nikolai immediately stopped fingering you and another stressed whine left you. "What now, Fedya?", Nikolai turned his head to face Fyodor, who only shrugged. "If you have any ideas on what to do next, carry them out if you like.", Nikolai turned back to you with an evil smirk on his face. "Alright, I already got one!", he giggled while taking off his undergarments. You instantly started to drip seeing his erect cock, you needed it inside you so bad.
"Would you look at that, our sweet is already dripping wet!", he bent down to your face, almost whispering to your lips; "You wanna feel me this bad? This is quite hilarious to me.", Nikolai then started to jerk himself off, chuckling deeply. "Well, the only thing you're gonna feel is my cum!", he picked up the speed, his thumb doing it's work on his tip. While watching this lewd view in front of him, Fyodor could feel himself get harder. Your cunt clenched around nothing when you saw an drop of his precum leak out of his tip. "How. . adorable!", Nikolai cheered while feeling his own climax nearing. He moved closer to you as more precum leaked, his cock mere inches away from your pussy, a smile making it's way onto his face. Nikolai's breathing got heavier until you felt his cum leak onto your cunt.
"—Atleast Fedya can slip inside your cunt easily after this!"
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I'm really disappointed how this turned out.
@soukokulatte , @miloofc , @crystalice09 , @medusalovessnakes , @kk-oma , @rxyyyyy !!
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dollysilena · 2 years
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no grave can hold my body down
(i’ll crawl home to her)
ryoumen sukuna, before he was a curse, was once a man.
genre: female implied reader but can be read as gender neutral, reincarnation au, unrequited feelings, unedited ngl, inspired by work song by hozier, angst angst angst
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long before ryoumen sukuna was a demon, the king of curses with four arms and two faces, he was once a man.
though, that has been long forgotten in history. sometimes, he even forgets it himself. the habits of being a cursed spirit had erased whatever was left of his mortal self from hundreds of years ago. he only enjoyed the carnal desires of blood, lust, and revenge. he had long forgotten what human emotions were, jealousy, anger, love. 
atleast he thought he forgot what all those were, up until he looked at you through the eyes of his new vessel.
ryoumen sukuna was once a man, who had a lover.
he swears his blood runs cold and he wasn’t even aware that could happen anymore. there you are, standing before him, hundreds of years after you died. 
over the course of a millennium of carnage and curses, your once distinct face had become hazy with time, until eventually he chose to forget you completely. he had no use for the memories of his once-human self. he was a demon now, afterall. but what a twisted curse chance of fate it was, that the reincarnation of his past lover had manifested infront of him, no, rather, it was infront of his new vessel. 
you had no idea who he was, much less that he was inside of yuuji itadori, watching you from afar.
he hadn’t even realized that curses could still feel and it repulsed him. what use could he have for you now? a mere human had no value to him. you don’t even remember your past life.
but he remembers it all.
it was easy to chose to forget, but there’s still an echo of you in his mind. the memories still crept through him like unrelenting roots to a tree. 
he remembers the way his hands, before they were covered in markings and his nails became claws, roamed your skin under the silk of your robes, as the cicadas buzzed outside and the first petals fell from the trees above you. your skin was illuminated by lantern light as he recalled the shape of your lips, stained like they bit into ripe fruit. but the memory that sears so deeply into his mind was the way you looked at him without fear.
there’s a bittersweet taste washing over his tongue, and it isn’t blood. he almost thinks it’s sorrow. it’s too similar to fear, for his liking. he swallows it back down, and buries it deep somewhere in himself where he hopes it will rot away.
he doesn’t act, no, that would be impulsive and too human. something he used to be. instead he watches you from the eyes of his vessel. 
and from his glimpses of you, even after hundreds of years, countless reincarnations, you’re still the same. for once, his focus isn’t on the simple demonic pleasures he’s grown accustomed to, they’re on you. a foolish human, the kind he so despises.
he wishes that it was as easy to despise you.
he feels you creeping through him, and not just in memories this time. it’s like webbing ivy, slowly but surely growing and entangling him. 
he recognizes the crinkle by your eyes when itadori gets you to smile, the familiar lips he begins to crave again, and worst of all, the tenderness of your eyes when you look at him without the thought of evil whispering in the back of your mind.
he wonders that if you’re still the same now, then maybe your love is still the same too.
but no, you’re not looking at him, you’re looking at the brat he’s trapped in.
he buries the grotesque thoughts of longing deep in the chasm of what used to be known as his heart. but he realizes it was never quite gone. 
it’s sickening really, he has no use for menial things like feelings, and he has no use for you. atleast that’s what he tells himself when he sees, feels, you press a chaste kiss onto itadori’s lips.
he tries to ignore the dull ache in his bones everytime you kiss itadori afterwards. but like your feelings for the damn brat he’s caged in, the dull ache grows into kindling, and slowly burns into a fire. 
it’s been so long since he’s felt anything that he almost can’t place his finger on what it could be, but he reit’s undoubtedly hatred. it consumes him like a fever.
it’s hatred for itadori, for making him watch this stupid puppy love from his internal cage. it’s hatred for himself for being foolish enough to degrade himself, the king of curses, into yearning for a human. it’s hatred for you, for making him feel again.
then came the deal.
“one: when i chant “extension,” you’ll hand over your body for one minute. two: you’ll forget this promise– i’ll promise that i won’t kill or injure anyone during that minute.”
of course he struck the deal as a means to his greater plan, but there was a whisper of a thought… he could see you again.
it’ll only just be once, he tells himself, just to finally put an end to this idiotic pining. it’ll be the means to an ends, and once it’s over, he’ll simply find a way to get rid of you. either from his thoughts or just entirely. he ignores the way he actually can’t bear the thought of that happening.
“extension.”
he then finds himself in a memory. the one he keeps replaying over and over.
the image is nearly identical, you laid beneath him with a flushed face as your delicate eyes gazing up at him without a trace of unease. he only realizes it’s not a memory when he realizes he’s in the modern age, where you aren’t outside listening to cicadas as cherry blossoms fell, but to whatever music you have playing as you laid snugly in your bed.
“yuuji?” you hum from beneath him. your voice makes him snap back to reality.
you seemingly hadn’t noticed the switch between the two. though, there would be no way to, considering that the markings strewn out over his body were only noticeable to himself and itadori. you, stupidly and thankfully, were blissfully unaware.
“what are you doing?” you giggled from beneath him, the sound too familiar for his liking. “kiss me already.”
he’s taken aback by the brazen request until he realizes you still think he’s itadori, your lover. for a brief moment, he’s repulsed to say he considers it. he should refuse, and extend himself back to his domain. while he’s done worser things than a simple kiss, kissing you seems too… vulnerable. it would anchor him too deeply into what he thinks is human. but you, laid beneath him, pliantly and unmistakably beautiful, makes him crave it too badly enough to reason anymore.
he finds his way to you, and the craving develops into a hunger. you’re warm to the touch, the once forgotten taste of your lips now familiar again. he feels the hairs on his neck rise when your hand gingerly comb through his locks as you melt beneath him. you’re consuming every inch of him and he feels as if he’s being burned away in a fire.
no bloodlust, carnage, or other carnal pleasure could satisfy him anymore. now that he’s remembered how it was like to touch you, to be touched by you, he couldn’t go back. not now, not ever again.
but the minute is over in the blink of an eye, and he finds himself in his domain, now left with only a pit in his stomach, and the feeling of you still ghosting on his lips.
ryoumen sukuna was once a human. but you still are. and you could never love a demon.
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mitsua · 3 months
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Ineffable infatuation
Summary: Barbatos past self, saw his future self with an amazing being by his side while using his power on accident, what is this feeling he's had ever since for them?
This is my apology for the last Barbatos fic that I did not finish (do you want me to though?) and I'm extremely proud of how it came out, I love this man so much
I highly recommend reading it while listening to "After Dark" by Mr. Kitty
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Warnings: mentions of dizziness, wars between Demons and Angels, screams of agony, repressing feelings, a Demon being seen as a God (very brief, don't come at me, it's for the story's sake), some spoilers (? I don't really consider them spoilers 'cause it's all on OM's SWD? original and early story...)
Genre: angst to romance (bittersweet) Pairing: Barbatos x MC
Series: Obey me! SWD? & NB! Words' count: 1.52k
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Barbatos found himself in what could be described as the beginning of a new era in the land he's just arrived to, barely recalling anything from whatever could have brought him here.
Who was he to begin with?
He looked up and down, feeling his body for the first time, adapting to its strange movements and finally, he started walking successfully.
It was all unknown to him, even more when he heard his own voice for the first time as he looked up and admired the endless starry sky above him. It was so beautiful—What was everything he was feeling just now?
He glanced down once again, noticing the fauna surrounding him. There were a couple of strange creatures to him, they were looking at him... he didn't know what to do.
Even less when a certain group of black little cloud-looking things came flying to him, his arms and hands moved by their own and without knowing he created something in front of him.
The little D's gang stopped on their tracks when they saw a peculiar oval-shaped thing glowing, more voices could be heard from it.
Barbatos could see everything. He saw it.
Atleast, until he saw you.
After several minutes of complete silence excepting some really rushed sounds from creatures they didn't know about, the glowing, flashy thing dissapeared.
Barbatos stood still, processing everything he's witnessed. He just used magic—as all his events have made him learn. He was catalogued as a Demon, he just landed on what will be the Devildom one day, he'll meet countless people.
Countless until he finally meets you.
That was the moment he pictured the most now that the only light there was in that bare world was the moon's.
He could remember feeling a certain way once you spoke to him for the first time, asking who he was at that classroom from the Royal Academia of Diavolo—whom he'll someday come to serve with all his might.
Still, he could not adress what the feeling was though.
He could not wait to come face to face with you, he had to do something, anything—no, he was only beginning to understand everything but if one thing he got clear from this experience was just how powerful he was.
To put it plainly, he could easily change anything from the timeline he wasn't pleased with. Anything.
So, he knew that even if he was craving to encounter you as soon as possible, he shouldn't, he would regret it even.
His last vision was you, you made him lose his concentration for a second so the portal he created vanished into thin air. He knew how to make it appear once again now, however, chose against.
If he got to see you once more, he knew he wouldn't think twice and get with you. What was wrong with it? A little voice asked on his mind.
Thus, instantly provoking a downpour of timelines he's just witnessed fall apart from his mistakes pop up everywhere, making him feel dizzy for a second and crouch down to take a hold of his head and heart which pulsed painfully.
The little D's did not comprehend a single thing that just happened, but after taking a glance to one another, they agreed that the creature infront of them seemed unharmful and flew to its side to aid in any way they could.
A couple grabbed one of his arms, a couple more the other and the last three gathered around his head, were they could see his face contorting in any way that made them all think he was not doing great.
One last look to a blue-horned one from the other six made them start chanting some noises they've learnt help to cure aches from experiences they've gone through on their few days alive in that wild environment.
Which then again, they didn't really know could be counted and only thought the night had no end nor beginning, so didn't mind it that much.
The following minutes were filled with unharmonied babbles coming from the seven little D's and slowly but surely, a light rainbow-colored glow and breeze enveloped Barbatos upper body, its appearance making his agony subside.
Barbatos stood up, feeling what he could express as painless with his lack of vocabulary for the moment, when in reality he felt even fresher than when he first blinked to his new life.
He bowed his head to the black creatures around him, trying to make them understand he felt... "grateful? yes, that's the right word."
The little D's assembled in a line infront of the man, excitedly screaming and making a face mirrored to Barbatos'.
He was smiling, for the first time in this new life, in his new life—his life—he smiled.
Right then and there he understood that he must take every step seriously if he wanted to achieve all the good and great things he saw moments ago.
More specifically, if he wanted to meet up with everyone he now knew the faces of, those who have made such feelings stir inside him that he could still not name, but he cared deeply from now on.
Barbatos began with a journey that he knew had an ending, one he didn't know about, but preferred it stayed that way for as long as possible. He only had on mind the day he'd make contact for the first time with you.
He saw the first Devildom's ruler arrive to the desert land, he was witness of the first encounter with other race they had, they proclaimed themselves as 'Angels'.
He heard the first cry for help of a demoness being shoot by a spear when the first conflict between those two races began.
He was known for millennia as the first magic user and the most powerful being who had ever stepped that cursed land that 'only Demons could reside.'
He was known as a God for sometime, a Deity who had to be praised in order to receive blessings in your life while he had gone on his first trip to the human world for a couple of centuries to get to know more about them, leaving the little D's in charge of everything oblivious to the fame he had made of himself.
That's when humans caught a glimpse of him and started the rumours of 'ungracefully-looking being', 'monstruously-looking being' and more so that he learnt the magic to make his demonic appearance look more human-alike and be able to blend in.
Nevertheless, he was both impressed and bothered by the fact that those rumours did nothing but spread further until the whole world got to now about the 'cursed beings being able to disguise themselves and come curse them to death or even trick them to eat their souls.'
Barbatos came back when he got to know that the latest Devildom's King had an offspring, only then did he remember once again those filled with pure curiousity amber eyes staring right at him when he first used his powers millennia ago.
He had to be there, be there when Diavolo first took charge of the Devildom himself once his father fell in a seemingly-endless sleep, he's sworn loyalty to him centuries ago, he couldn't and wouldn't want to back down.
As years went by his side, Barbatos got to experience tons of instants that he felt his heart swell with pride, greed, envy, wrath, lust, gluttony and sloth—just as the avatars that he knew and slightly feared were extremely close to meet him and his master for the first time ever.
The Celestial War came. A bloodshed was spent, an eternity seemed to pass while he could hear and recall all those pained screams from his companions being butchered by those who called themselves 'merciful' that made his blood boil and almost lose control. He knew better than to lose it, he knew this would happen sooner or later—he had to accept it—he had to accept he could not save everyone he cared for.
Following the 'most traumatizing events' as he'd decided to aknowledge it all as, Diavolo kept his word and continued with the Royal Academy of Diavolo foundation, which the latter promised one day would hold creatures from all three worlds.
Barbatos got to know each and every emotion he thought he would feel in his whole life, yet once he saw you, physically present infront of him, he discovered there were many more he's kept hidden in his heart just from this moment on.
You, who had held his sanity for as long as he's seen you that first time from a magically-created screen that—even if he felt something deep inside him then—once he got to talk to you made it bloom and he could finally name it.
He was in love.
All the time, all his time was about you, and now, he planned on not letting any more of this precious moments go to waste and make you his. Because Barbatos, as much loyalty he'd pledged to Diavolo, has—since the beginning of time—been yours always.
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All writings' rights reserved © 2024 Mitsua. (Credit to the respective owners of the pictures and tagged anime character.) ⌇ my navigation!
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mikaikaika · 7 months
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Dude huge huge huge kudos to Tubbo's voice acting in the last message he recorded to Sunny. It encaptures so much despair and the little bit of hope as he wishes Sunny is being fed by atleast someone. The softness in his voice contrasting the roughness of the gravity of what the message holds. The genuine sincerety as he apologises for having Sunny face this because we are aware of qTubbo's suicidal tendencies. And despite all that qTubbo is going through that farce he is putting to try to be strong for Sunny as his last emotion filled laugh sounds on telling Sunny to go on. All of it conveys bittersweet-ness with such sincerity is absolutely remarkable.
All in all it just encapsulates the message of the love was there. It didnt change anything. It didnt save him. There were just too many forces against them. But it still matters that the love was there <3333
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