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#birds always look dumb
geekynerddemon · 1 year
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Steggy Week Day 7 17: Free day
Based on @indiefic ‘s Mending the Empty Bones
I got intense nostalgia for this beautiful story.
I know I’m super late to the last day for steggy week but I knew I had to do this idea justice.
Special thanks to @pixel-concept for getting me a really nice walking reference for Steve
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robotsafari · 4 months
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“you insolent little bitch.”
-ansem, seeker of darkness (he definitely said this)
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stormears · 5 months
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ffMRmgoOOMMMG I just found a site with the Legend of the Guardians (Guardians of Ga'Hoole movie, 2010) ART BOOK! I've wanted to see this for years! Granted I've not put that much time into seriously looking for it but damn!! I've always wanted to see it!
According to the Archive.org page, it was added just last month!
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witherbythesword · 2 months
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#when i was a kid I was kinda neglected and my parents didn't like me very much but whatever#in tv there would always be these talent#and they would stare little kids with they parents being THERE and PROUD#so in my kid brain i thought: alright so to better my situation i just need to get really good at something and then they'll care for me#and the only skill i had been complimented on before was drawing#so i started teaching myself drawing#birds because i liked them and plants because i thought my mother loved and later skeletons because i was emo lol#and i think how i am so perfectionist in my art (eventhough i try to be happy with just whatever i make these days)#and i think about that quote of suzanne riveca thats like:#(my art) has to be perfect it has to be irreproachable in every way to make up for it#to make up for the fact that it's me#and about that one tweet that went something lile#sometimes we strive for pervection in our art because we hope to one day create something that doesn't look like we made it#and how i love drawing and hat that knife against my throat that hinges my life on it being good#and how no matter what i do#I can't get rid of that sinking feeling that i always have to struggle and earn my place in someones life#even when i know it's not like that and thats just the mentally ill part of my brain being loud and dumb#Like i got so many issues under controll by now#many reason to be proud! and be positive about things getting better and my own strength#but some part of my brain is still that little girl alone in all the empty rooms#and i can't get her out of there#because the strength that girl needed to make it through is the same strength i need to help myself through the waves of the aftermath#like i feel like to heal i'd need to allow mysf to be weak but that prospect of not holding myself clenxhed like a fist is so scary#and also knowing how bad my brain can be who knowd what would happen lol#and I WISH not every therapist in my city that accepts patients was a weird nutjob#so i could talk to them about it rather than the tumblr tag#but this is the hand we've been given and it's the hand we need to hold or however that goes#a few days ago someone called me charming and that was very nice#tumblr still limiting the tags to 30 😔 how is a girl supppse to therapise herself in that economy????#whatever!!! i am shattering like glass but at least i have viddy games and cool people in my life that like me despite it all and music
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feline-evil · 1 year
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Clasping my hands together in prayer and wishing The GamersTM weren't also fans of what i'm a fan of
#jay talkin#the pain of being a fan of a specific character who has so many things that The Gamers are Fucking stupid about#constant cinema-sins esque gotchas abt stuff that they think they r so smart for pointing out#when in fact they are being so facking dumb. do u know my pain as a kazuhira miller liker#everyday The Gamers do a 'gotcha' of 'oh he couldnt do that he's blind'#do we need to talk about how uncomfortable that is to hear parroted around#do we need to have a talk about the wide range of sight loss covered under the diagnosises that get you labelled Legally blind.#do we need to talk about the fact being blind does not always = total 100% sight loss.#do we need to talk about Being Normal about a disabled man for once in our miserable lives.#also you can't tell him what to do thats hellmaster fucking miller are you kidding me.#also had to bear witness to people callong him a weeb for being called Kazuhira....#my brother in christ how are you gonna act like you know shit abt what yr talking abt#when you don't know that kazuhira fuckin miller is a whole ass japanese man with a backstory#that involves the discrimination and xenophobia he faced as a man who looks like he does#a WEEB? A WEEB?? HES FROM. JAPAN.#oh no way the guy from japan has a japanese name? must be weeb shit guys bc our lil racist addled brains#cant understand that japan is a country outside of our commodification of it bc we r less smart than a bird#WHEEZE. SORRY. I GOT MAD AGAIN FOR A MOMENT. anyway.#GamersTM are insufferable and lack the media literacy to actually be metal gear fans so i wish they'd Go Away#putting metal gear but especially kazuhira miller up on a shelf till you guys can learn to behave
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megalony · 1 month
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You Called My Wife?
This is a new Jake Seresin imagine, my first request for Jake and I hope you will all like it. Please let me know what you think.
Taglist: @justagirlthatlovedtoread @musicistheway @avada-kedavra-bitch-187 @luula @missdreamofendless @bradleybeachbabe @woderfulkawaii @amberpanda99 @daggersquadphantom @marvel-and-chicago-fan @angryknightstatesmantrash @minjix @lyje @kmc1989 @itsmytimetoodream @noonenuts @hiireadstuff @ashie-babie @classyunknownlover @jayyeahthatsme @sp1ritssz @dumb-fawkin-bitch @oliverstarksbae @gimatida @heart-35 @supernaturalstilinski @kyky9103 @wutheringhearts2275 @gay4hotmilfs @itshamleth @chaoticnosleepinfluencer @gs29 @wh0reforsmutstuff @mel-vaz @natashamea18 @chrisevansdaughter @alexandra848484 @deena-beena-weena @targaryenluvs @kpoplover-19 @marvelmenarebeautiful @gillybear17
@zoeybennett @mrspeacem1nusone @zephyrmonkey @estella-novella @eleventhdoctorsangel @kniselle @senjoritanana @shauna-carsley @dottierose @cfdhouse51 @darkfemme1 @rainechase45 @lolalolsstuff @jupiter1700 @ashdoctor @an-aliens-ghost @lunaroserites @houseoftwistedspirits @callsignwidow @winterreader-nowwriter @reneinii @bellsbomb @western-pyro
Masterlist
Summary: The Dagger squad don't know much about Jake's personal life. And when he gets hurt during an exercise, they are surprised who comes to look after him.
Enjoy.
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Reaching into his back pocket, Jake pulled out the pair of sunglasses he had been carrying around with him for the last few weeks. The sun here back at home was intense and he couldn't stand the migraines it gave him. Even when he was up in the air, he often had his sunglasses on. He didn't care about the way the glasses pinched his ears or gave him splitting pains in the sides of his neck.
If Bob could wear his prescription glasses to see, then Jake could wear his sunglasses to stop him squinting so much and relieve the headaches he got that were becoming chronic.
His hands fell to his hips once his visors were perched on the bridge of his nose and he looked around.
It hadn't taken Jake nearly as long as he thought to complete his physical. They were doing physical assessments and training every other day to get them ready for their next assignment. They were going to be going against gravity, travelling up to G9 range and it would cause problems with breathing, taking in oxygen and could starve their brains for a few seconds, if not longer.
They all needed to be at their best physically and mentally to prepare for this and up to now, Jake was ready and rearing to go.
Today was training exercises on the ground rather than in the air. They were all doing different activities and now that Jake was rejoining the rest of the squad after his physical, he was supposed to be doing safety and maintenance checks.
He took a look around the open air field. Bradley was over to one side, looking like he was trying to do some physical exercises, but he kept stopping to quietly argue with Maverick who was following him around like a dark, looming shadow. Jake wasn't going to be going over there. He noticed Phoenix and Bob were at their aircraft in the middle of their maintenance. While Coyote was off to one side doing pushups; he had messed up somewhere if that was his punishment. And Jake had already passed Fanboy who was on his way for his own physical.
He busied himself finding one of the clipboards and he jogged over to his aircraft, smiling and patting his hand against the bulk like it was an old friend he was meeting up with.
He circled the aircraft like a vulture, checking the wings, the engines- which had had a run in with a flock of birds two days ago which Jake had been lucky hadn't completely ruined his left engine. He checked the wheels and made sure they were all clipped and chained down so the craft wasn't going anywhere without him.
Once all the outside checks were done, he climbed up the ladder and hopped inside.
It always felt weird to sit in the plane without his proper flight suit or his signature red helmet, but he wasn't going anywhere today. He was only turning the engine on to check everything was working and making sure he got all the right responses to show he would be ready for whatever training exercise he had to go out on next.
He slouched back in the seat, spreading his knees apart with the clipboard in front of him and the pen twisting between his fingers.
After ticking a few boxes, Jake tilted his head back and poised the pen behind his ear while his hand shifted to undo the first button on his uniform. He slid his hand beneath his shirt until his fingers found the familiar silver chain hanging around his neck.
He imbedded the ring into his palm that hung on the end of the chain, always tapping and jostling against his chest whenever he moved.
It felt safer to have his wedding ring on his chain rather than his finger. If he had any accidents and needed to be taken for a scan or for surgery, they would cut his ring off. Rings got in the way, jewellery got in the way and got lost but a chain around his neck was private and secure and more importantly, Jake had that ring as close to his heart as possible.
A soft look crossed his face as he brought his hand to his mouth and kissed the ring that had created a halo indent in the centre of his hand.
"I'll be home soon." He murmured against the ring as a picture of (Y/n) flashed before his eyes.
The last deployment Jake had been on had almost killed him. Three and a half months away from home. Three and a half months where he couldn't see, touch or feel his wife in his arms or have her lips against his or her body pressed up against his own. All he got were a few brief phone calls or five minutes of faceTime every other day, if he wasn't being shipped straight out from dawn until dusk.
He was much happier here where he could spend each night in his own bed, safe in his home with his wife. He didn't have to sleep alone or feel like he was going insane from having absolutely no physical touch or contact with (Y/n). Never before had Jake thought or believed in having withdrawal symptoms for another human being until he got married and had to face the prospect of leaving (Y/n) behind.
When he was done with his checks, Jake heaved himself up to his feet and climbed down back to level ground again.
He waved his clipboard up and down in front of his face like a fan, relishing the slight breeze it created to his melting skin. If he were back home in this heat his shirt would already be off and he would be lounging around in a pair of shorts. Or be would be on the beach in this weather. Either of those thoughts sounded very appealing right now.
He stood still for a few moments, taking in his surroundings and wondering what the next task would be, but his mind kept wandering off to the girl waiting at home for him. Exactly where he wanted to be right now.
"Bob, are you almost done?" Phoenix tilted her head back with an exasperated sigh, one hand clamped around her hip as she the other held onto the ladder Bob was perched on top of.
He was filling up their aircraft with fuel, they had half a tank but it was better to be safe than sorry because they didn't know how long they would be out on their next flight exercise. The last thing they needed was to be marked down and sent to do two hundred push ups because they thought half a tank would be sufficient.
"Almost." His voice was as passive as ever while he swiped his arm across his temple, wiping away the beads of sweat glistening in the afternoon sun.
"Bob, come on we've got other stuff to do."
He didn't know what happened.
One moment Bob was pushing his glasses further up his nose, rolling his eyes at his impatient partner calling up the orders below him. But the next, a shockwave was rattling up the ladder he was perched on and set him off balance.
His hands scrambled to steady himself before he fell off and he subsequently dropped the fuel line that had been in his right hand just as he unclipped it from the air craft that was now fuelled up. Bob scrambled for balance, bashing his legs into the side of the plane and earning a cut down his left forearm that scraped along a jagged edge on the ladder.
But it was the fuel line he was concerned with. It wasn't like filling up a car at the fuel station. The air crafts were large with tanks high up at the back. They had to use large funnel lines that looked like double sized garden hoses with a large round metal clip on the end the size of Bob's hand. That metal created a sizzling sound that sliced through the air when he dropped it.
The line swooped through the air like a bird trying to land but Bob could of cried when he heard a sickening crunch below him. He didn't want to imagine what it collided with- who, it collided with. His eyes snapped closed and he clung to the ladder, trying to gain his balance back so he didn't fall and break an arm or a leg.
The resounding crack echoed around the base and shuddered through everyone within close range. It was a sound no one expected to echo through the open air like that, it travelled far and wide and had everyone coiling in on the spot.
The metal end of the fuel line pelted down, gaining strength and speed as it swung past the ladder, lifted slightly into the air and smacked straight into the right side of Jake's head. Upon impact, his sunglasses snapped and flung off his nose and took flight on a course of their own, six feet across the base.
An awful crack shuddered through Jake's ears and rattled through his head as his eyes automatically snapped closed and his shoulders hunched up. Both arms recoiled into his chest as his clipboard slipped through his fingers that twitched and spasmed, unsure what to do as his body seemed to shutdown and recalibrate all at once.
The force sent his head snapping backwards until his neck got whiplash and his body followed his head's sense of direction, thrusting backwards until he landed harshly on the concrete floor.
Shockwaves rattled through his body causing his legs to shake and spasm out against the floor as if he was kicking and throwing a tantrum and all the air left his lungs when his back hit the floor. It took a few seconds for his diaphragm to loosen and allow his lungs to take in a deep breath, but when he did, a choked moan escaped his lips.
It felt like he'd been shot in the head.
He could feel his pulse throbbing through his temple and circulating all around the circumference of his head like someone pelting round a relay race. He could feel his veins throbbing and the blood steadily trickling down the right side of his face. The feeling of blood oozing down the bridge of his nose and around his eye socket made his nose scrunch up in disgust.
His hands curled and twisted against his chest, desperate to move but the sudden onset of trembling in his bones made it impossible for Jake to coordinate his body properly.
The trembling continued even as Jake suddenly realised he couldn't hear anything around him. He couldn't open his eyes. No sounds broke through the static barrier building up in his ears. He had no control over moving a single part of his body. It felt like his head had been severed from the rest of his body.
"Jesus Bob, what the Hell?!" Bradley spun on his heels and made into a sprint towards the three of them, Maverick hot on his heels.
The sight of Jake, laid out on his back, body overwrought with trembles and blood pooling steadily down one side of his face was a sickening sight none of them ever wanted to witness.
"I wasn't- didn't you see the ladder?" Bob hissed like a snake as he shakily slid down the ladder onto unsteady feet.
His hands began to rake up and down his thighs, wiping the sweat onto his trousers as his glasses started to fall down the bridge of his nose. He hadn't done that on purpose. He didn't just let go of the fuel line; Phoenix bashed into the ladder and knocked him off course. He would have fallen if he didn't scramble for his balance. It could just as easily have been Bob's head split open if he fell the other way or completely lost his footing on the ladder.
"I'm sorry-"
A groan spluttered past Jake's lips and stopped all their ramblings. He managed to curl his fingers around the middle of his shirt and he scrunched it up in his fists as tightly as possible. His legs continued to thrash against the floor but when he tried to open his eyes, he couldn't seem to do it.
"Oh God." He tried his best to reach his hand up towards his head but he could barely lift either arm from trembling against his chest.
Without his glasses that had been broken and flung off somewhere on the base, the sun was beating down on him with unwavering strength. His right eye was blinking furiously to try and stop the blood from getting into his eyes that were rolling to the back of his head that was pounding like a drum.
"Everyone shut up." Maverick's voice snapped through the air like a whip and stopped all their ramblings at once.
He crouched down beside Jake with Bradley on his other side with Bob and Phoenix hovering anxiously in the background and Coyote running over at the sound of commotion.
The wound looked bad. Maverick tilted Jake's head back and tried to touch his hairline to get a proper look. A large slash line went from his hairline towards his eyebrow and the skin had been split apart so neatly it looked like it had been cut with a sharp knife. Blood oozed out in every direction and splattered across Jake's temple and down his nose towards both his eyes like a jam donut had been tossed at his head.
He couldn't see his skull or any bone which was a good sign, but the blunt force could have been enough to crack his skull and give him a fracture. He most definitely had a concussion which meant he could have side effects.
He could start throwing up, he could black out or go fully unconscious, he could have a seizure if the impact was bad enough.
"Get him down to the medbay now." With a click of his hand over to the left, Coyote hurried forward and knelt down behind Jake while Bradley shuffled forward.
The pair of them carefully took one of Jake's arms each and looped them around the back of their necks.
"Alright, up. Let's get you up Hangman." Bradley looped his right arm around Jake's waist while his left hand gripped Jake's wrist. He held his breath and slowly pushed up onto his feet, slowly pulling Jake with him who looked very worse for wear.
Jake's head flopped forward as soon as he was sitting up. He groaned again, spluttering through a moan, spit forming on his lips and blood still trickling down his face. He could feel the shock setting in because even his neck was shaking now and once he was on his feet, his knees wavered and his legs felt oddly heavy and useless. He could barely stay upright and when his knees gave way, he slumped down like he was trying to sit on an imaginary chair.
His hands scrunched down around Coyote and Bradley's shoulders as each of them held his waist and kept him up on his feet.
Both Jake's feet bent awkwardly and the toes of his shoes scraped against the floor as the pair of them dragged him slowly towards the open hanger doors. He tried to move his legs and he did somewhat help them, but he relied on them to drag him along because he felt like collapsing to the floor and curling up into a ball.
He managed to find the will to open his eyes once they were inside, but the sight of the tiled floor disappearing and all the lines blurring before his eyes made his head swoon.
He found his eyes rolling around in his skull before he jolted forward with a croaky "Gonna puke."
True to his word, Jake tossed up his lunch the moment the boys paused in their quick shuffle towards the medbay. He felt a little better after that and he managed to lift his head once the three of them began their awkward tandem walk together.
By the time they were near the medic bay, Jake managed to place one foot in front of the other. He did an awkward walk and started to help them so they didn't have to heave him the whole way there.
"We've had an accident. The fuel line cracked Hangman straight in the temple and knocked him out. He threw up on the way down here." Bradley looked between the two medics idling around and waited for one of them to point towards the bed in the left corner of the large bunker space.
They trotted to the left and turned around, carefully easing Jake down until he was sat in the middle of the bed.
He felt more alive and a bit better once he was sat down. His head flopped back until the base of his head was touching the back of his shoulders and his shaking hands gripped the edge of the bed with intensity to keep himself sitting upright. It took all his effort to stop himself trembling and he tried to take deep breaths to ward off the sickness and the wave of dizziness that overwhelmed him.
"Okay Seresin, let's take a look."
Coyote and Bradley backed up until they were stood to one side. Neither of them fancied going back outside to finish off their exercises when Jake didn't look in his best shape. They would rather wait here to make sure he was alright and then head back to the rest of the team and tell them how he was fairing up. It was clear that Jake would be going home early today, he was lucky not to have been killed with that force, there was no way he was carrying on with any work today after this.
Jake begrudgingly lifted his head when one of the doctors stood in front of him. He let the man hold his chin and tilt his head from side to side to assess the damage and when he shone a pen light across his eyes, Jake winced.
A frightful yelp left his lips when the man tried to touch the wound and he reeled back with a groan.
"Afraid I'm gonna need an X-ray before I can stitch it. I'll clean the wound and get you some painkillers first." They were lucky the wound was on his head as they had a small, portable X-ray scanner in the back room they could use just to double check they didn't have to send him to hospital for urgent treatment. But if it looked okay, he could get some pain relief, be stitched up and sent home for the day.
"Great." Jake winced, trying to form a lopsided smile, but he couldn't quite manage it.
At least he would get to go home earlier than he thought.
***
"Hey," Bob groaned as sweat dripped off his body and onto a small puddle forming on the stone beneath him. His arms trembled as he tried to continue his push ups now that he was well into the hundreds. "Who's that?"
He nudged his nose against his shoulder to push the glasses further up his nose while he indicated his head to the left, signalling Phoenix's attention towards the person advancing across the base.
Maverick had told Bob and Phoenix to finish off Jake's safety checks, prep his fuel tank too and then do a set of two hundred push ups. They both knew they should have been more careful and they shouldn't have started squabbling like children when Jake was hauled off to the medic bay.
Phoenix lifted her head and glanced her eyes around, trying to find out who Bob was referring to. When her eyes set on a woman walking their way, her brows furrowed and she watched where she was walking.
She wasn't in uniform, whoever she was. She had on a baby blue tank top and a pair of denim shorts that stopped just before her knees. Her bag was hung on her shoulder, the strap clutched tightly in her hand and there was a nervous look plastered across her face.
The woman seemed to spare them a glance, noting that they were both sweating through their uniforms, before her eyes set on Maverick and she made a beeline for him.
"Mav, where is he?" (Y/n) bit her lower lip nervously when she reached Maverick who greeted her with a warm smile and a hand on her elbow.
"He's with a doctor, come with me."
(Y/n) nodded and let Maverick lead her inside the base. She couldn't quite believe how high up the ceilings were or how large the bay doors were, it was like everything was amplified as if giants worked and lived here. It felt strange to be walking round here with Maverick when Jake always said he would give her a tour round one day. Plans changed.
She had been expecting much worse when Maverick rang her and said Jake had had a 'minor accident' at the base, but knowing it was nothing to do with a crash or him being in a plane at all made (Y/n) feel better. It stopped her from having a breakdown or a panic attack as she drove down here, but she couldn't fathom what had happened. What kind of accident would her husband have when he was supposed to be safe here on the ground?
She glanced over her shoulder, noticing that the two others who had been doing press ups were now following after her and Maverick, presumably so they could see Jake too. They must be part of his team.
"What happened?"
"Phoenix and Bob, behind you," Maverick tossed a look over his shoulder and pointed his thumb in their direction. "Had a mishap when they fueled their plane. The pipeline dropped and caught Jake in the temple. I think he's got a mild concussion, but he'll be fine."
(Y/n) brushed a stray strand of hair behind her ear, hearing her shoes clicking loudly against the tiled floor as she followed Maverick around three corners and down a long corridor until they were in front of a medical wing.
That didn't sound too bad. That wasn't nearly as bad as she had been expecting, but it still wasn't good.
Her husband shouldn't be getting into accidents like this at work. He shouldn't be getting smashed in the head with their equipment. He was a pilot, an aviator. He was training every day to be in top physical performance and here he was with a concussion because his team had clearly lacked concentration.
It took all the effort (Y/n) had not to run ahead once they walked into a large open unit almost the same size as the open field outside. There was only one patient in here and (Y/n) set her sights on him immediately.
Jake was sat on the side of a bed, his legs swinging back and forth like a child at a doctor's appointment. His hands were clutching either side of the bed, his lips were set in a firm line and he kept squinting and closing his eyes as a doctor was stood in front of him, cleaning his wound.
Once they were close enough, (Y/n) hurried past Maverick and dropped her bag down by the foot of the bed. She didn't want to get in the way when the doctor was clearly trying to assess Jake and sort him out, but the moment Jake glanced to the left, his eyes widened and he jerked out of the doctor's grip.
"Baby." The surprise was evident in his voice and he let go of the bed to reach an arm out in (Y/n)'s direction. As soon as he started curling his fingers in a grabbing motion, (Y/n) smiled and moved forward.
Jake immediately coiled his arm around (Y/n)'s waist and reeled her closer until she had to plant her hands on his shoulders to steady herself. His fingers squeezed her hip tightly and he kissed the top of her chest before he glanced over her shoulder towards Maverick.
"You called my wife?"
The shock was evident in Jake's voice, but it was the looks of the rest of the team that made him wince. He hadn't mentioned to any of them that he happened to be married, that knowledge was on a need to know basis and as his superior, Maverick was the only one who needed to know. For emergency situations like this if Jake ever got hurt or shot down or sent to hospital.
There was no way they could let him drive home and since he had been injured, Maverick knew it was best to call (Y/n) and let her know so she could come and pick him up.
"You got concussed and you won't be able to drive home. Yes, I called your missus. You're welcome."
Maverick placed his hand on his hip and tilted his head to one side. Once Jake was silenced with that one look, Maverick nodded to himself and turned to leave. He knew none of them would be doing any more exercises today and he was okay with that, they would call it a day and start again tomorrow.
"You're married?"
"You never mentioned you're married to such a stunning girl."
(Y/n) tilted her head to the right, figuring the man that said that must be Bradley, the one Jake said was close to Maverick. He had a raised brow and his lips quirked into a smile beneath his moustache while both arms folded tightly over his chest.
She could feel the glares Jake was sending towards Bradley, squinting and glaring over in his direction before he looked back up at his wife.
With a quiet groan, Jake moved his hands from (Y/n)'s hips so he could bind his arms tightly around her waist. His hands feathered up and down her back and he pushed forward until his lips attached to her exposed chest just beneath her collar bone.
"Why didn't you tell us?"
"Why did you need to know?" He countered, smirking tiredly against (Y/n)'s chest and he twisted his head so the left side of his face could press down against her skin. His cheek nuzled into her chest and he looked over at the team, watching the blush that rose to Bob's face that tilted down to look at his shoes and the way Phoenix rubbed the back of her neck bashfully.
He hadn't told them because it wasn't their business, they didn't need to know. He was in love, he was head over heels in love with his wife and in Jake's eyes, she was his little secret.
He didn't want the team teasing him or asking about her or trying to make jokes that he was tied down. He had dealt with that in the past with other people he worked with and he didn't like it. He smiled when people flirted with him in bars, but he kindly turned every one of them down and didn't let them get too close. (Y/n) was the reason why.
Sometimes it felt safer to keep (Y/n) as his little secret. What they did was dangerous, they had all lost friends in this job and it was hard to bring friends and family into this life. Jake didn't know if introducing (Y/n) to his team would be too much.
For him, it felt better to keep work and home life separate.
With a sigh, Jake lifted his cheek from (Y/n)'s chest, his lips forming a thin line as he stared up at her despite the headache that was swirling around behind his eyes. He scanned his eyes around the team who were all watching on eagerly like this was their favourite tv soap.
"Darlin', this is the dagger squad," Jake waved his hand around, muttering their call signs to which (Y/n) nodded earnestly. "Guys, this is my wife, (Y/n)."
"Nice to meet you all, even under strange circumstances," (Y/n) quirked a brow when Bob tipped his head down with his hands clasped tightly behind his back. Clearly he felt guilty for the accident and (Y/n) was sure she heard him mutter a soft 'sorry again' clearly directed towards Jake.
He wasn't going to hold a grudge. It had been an accident and a few stitches was much better than some of the injuries he'd gotten on this job. But he would be holding this over them in the future and he knew he had earned himself a few free beers down at the Hard Deck for this.
"How bad is it then?"
Jake felt shockwaves coursing through his blood when (Y/n)'s hands moved from his shoulders to gently cup his face in her hands.
He loved the feeling of her thumbs brushing across his cheekbones just beneath his eyes and the way her fingertips tapped behind the tip of his jaw near his ears. His lips curved into a smile, despite the aching in his temple that had gone down a little when he took the aspirin and painkillers he was given.
His eyes squinted up at his wife whose lips curved into a pouting smile while her head tilted to the side, inspecting the wound on his temple.
All the blood had been cleaned from Jake's face and neck and his head had been X-rayed and dabbed with anticeptic, all he needed now was stitches.
"What am I gonna do with you?" (Y/n) murmured softly while she tilted Jake's head down in her hands so she could pepper kisses against the middle of his temple which no doubt would be aching. She didn't want to touch or go too near the wound, she knew even a light touch was going to hurt and she didn't want to hurt him. But he leaned into her touch and groaned, tightening his arms around her waist while his hands slid further down her back.
"I can think of a few things."
"I don't think I wanna see that." Coyote ran a hand down his face and patted Bradley's chest before he began to walk. He would see what Maverick wanted them to do, whether they were all getting the afternoon off or just Jake. He murmured a soft "Nice to meet you, Mrs Seresin." And laid a hand on (Y/n)'s shoulder as he passed her.
"Yeah, us neither. Sorry again, Hangman, we'll owe you a few rounds when your back in action." Phoenix waved her hand towards Jake and dipped her head before she headed out with Bob following in her wake.
He uttered a soft "Nice to see you, sorry Hangman." before he followed Phoenix, silently praying they wouldn't have to finish the last twenty six push ups they had skipped when they followed Maverick and (Y/n) down here to the medic bay.
"Well, you look like your in good hands, so I'll catch up with you later. Maybe we'll see you soon, Mrs Hangman."
Once Bradley disappeared, (Y/n) managed to untangle herself from her husband's arms, causing him to grunt and pout dramatically. His hands reached out for her but she didn't move far. She stepped out from between his legs and moved to stand on his left side near the end of the bed he was perched on. Her arm looped around his back and her hand gave his shoulder a squeeze while she kissed the good side of his temple.
"When can I take him home?"
"I'll just do the stitches and then he's all yours."
Jake couldn't hide the grimace that flooded his face when he saw the needle and thread. He didn't like the inconvenience of stitches. His eyes briefly glanced up at (Y/n) before he shimmied round on the seat so his back was towards her. And he slowly reclined his head until the back of his head was settled down on (Y/n)'s shoulder.
He did his best to keep his head steady and his eyes fell closed when he saw an injection needle coming close. The numbing agent to make the stitches more bearable.
A low whistle passed his lips and when (Y/n)'s free hand curled over his thigh, Jake reached down and curled his hand over hers. He squeezed tight and tried to take slow, deep breaths when the needle finally started puncturing through his skin. It didn't exactly hurt, but he felt a sharp sting and each time the thread was pulled tight, Jake could feel his brow lifting as the skin was dragged back together.
Six stitches later and (Y/n) could barely feel her hand from how tightly Jake was squeezing it. She leaned her head down and kissed the top of his head, nudging her nose against his soft wavy hair as Jake finally opened his eyes.
"You're good to go with a mild concussion, Seresin. No flying for twenty-four hours, and if you go any higher than G7, I'll need to see you back here for a check over."
"Copy that."
"Thank you for patching him up."
When Jake hopped up from the bed, (Y/n) moved her arm lower to secure around his waist and she pressed a quick kiss to the side of his jaw which caused his lips to pull into a wide grin. He draped his arm over her shoulders, feeling much better than he did earlier.
The last thing he wanted to do was lean on (Y/n) and have her dragging him out of here like the guys had heaved him in earlier. He could walk on his own two feet again.
"That's going to leave a scar." (Y/n) murmured softly, reaching her left hand up to graze her fingers over his brow just beneath the row of navy blue stitches on his temple. It wasn't going to leave a dent or a prominent, deep line, but it would leave a faint streak of white like a dash of paint across his skin.
She pressed another kiss to Jake's jaw until he tilted his head down and captured her lips in a soft, burning kiss instead. "I know," He muttered softly against her lips, kissing her again and again as they walked as slow as possible out of the base.
"But I know you love my war wounds."
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deadghosy · 7 months
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THANKS TO @lazyemmy FOR THIS LOVELY IDEA OF THE PENGUIN! READER💗🦆
HAZBIN HOTEL X PENGUIN! READER
prompt: during one extermination an angel had kidnapped you and took you to heaven based off a common mistake
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“Quack?” You were literally trying to water the hotel’s flowers when you forgot about extermination….the leader of the exterminators had grabbed you by your sailor outfit Velvette made you.
“Shut your mouth short stuff.” You heard a man’s voice to see a person wearing a horned mask and a golden robe. You panicked as Charlie had told you about a man like this as Adam scoffs seeing your panicked state.
“JEEZ CHILL OUT YOU FUCKIN' BIRD BRAIN!” Adam yells as he enters in the portal of heaven with the exterminators behind him. He plops you down on the clouded floors to see the heavenly gates Charlie tells you in stories
As you waddled you seen a male who seemed to be waiting for you. “Ah! Reader..so glad to have you. It seems as if heaven had made a mistake and sent you to hell.” St. Peter said as he picks you up having the gates open. Your eyes widen at the bright light of heaven as angels walk and smile. “Welcome to your true home [reader]”
The air smelt so clean and not bloody as it seemed so peaceful and holy. After St. Peter getting your room and home ready to stay in heaven. You start to feel a little “home” sick as you hope the hotel crew was doing well and aren’t going crazy.
Which they totally are as Charlie is panicking calling her father.
After a few days , Adam will visit you a lot saying how he got forced to look after you…(he wasn’t forced he just liked how cute and pure you are but he’ll never admit it) Adam makes dumb ass jokes about how all those sinners down there should die and perish as he pats you on your little head. You quacked trying to show some worry for your friends down there.
“Oh them? Hah! They’re probably running like headless chickens looking for your ass.” Adam says with his usual grin as he pops some popcorn in his mouth. “Want some?” He says as he waves a piece of popcorn in your face. you sniffed it and ate it from his hand as adam's eyes widen at your cuteness…
you're like a little baby..💗😭😭😭
Adam grabs your chubby cold cheeks as he faces you towards him. “Never leave here. Okay?” He says seriously low with a protective tone as you quack nodding nervously at how quick this dude got attached to you.
Adam pushes your face away from him smirking. “Good now let’s watch this video I saw off of this human app called ‘TikTok’”
Lute didn’t know how to approach you, but she sends you small gifts that reminds her of you as you just open them like “quack?” And a head tilt confused but take it in anyways.
I imagine lute literally being your bodyguard when you don’t have any work to do as she just pushes anyone who gets to close to you away. LIKE IT COULD BE AN OLD LADY AND SHE WOULD BE LIKE “BITCH MOVE!”😭
After the 3rd day of the 1 week of being in heaven, lute definitely got overprotective of you. Always keeping tabs on where you go and which house you deliver mail to. I mean who knows what would happen to a cute soul like you? (A/n: Omg this sounds like a yandere…)
The angels love how adorable you are as they pet you. Immediately you are popular just like how you are popular in hell. Sera has given you a job as a mail boy again as you smile.
I can see St.Peter visit you when he isn’t on duty or just when someone takes his spot so he can say hi and hang out with you.
You wear a cute little yellow and white mail delivery fit thanks to sera who got a designer to get you to fit it perfectly.
You love how you still got your delivery job as you leave a cookie on the front porches of the angels. It’s like your significant signature to others to have a good day.
Adam and lute were arguing one time in front of you and you sniffled not liking the loud noises and immediately, and surprisingly. Adam and Lute pretended everything was okay to make you happy as Adam picked you up and took you away to get your favorite snack for you.
Sera checks on you as well with Emily by her side as Emily just finds you so cute and is excited to get to hang out with you more.
Emily immediately hugs and kisses your head amused by your small and kind soul she sees in you.
Sera would like to take you on stroll on week 2. She’d like to show you around heaven with Emily as she hold you in her arms gushing chow cute you are.
NOW I CAN IMAGINE YOU AND EMILY GOING ON A SHOPPING SPREE TO EXPLORE NEW CLOTHING AESTHETIC ✨💗
You showed yourself to be an angel by spirit as you helped a kid get a new lollipop, which makes sera smile at you being helpful as he is glad to hav with here in heaven and not they “ratchet” place.
You do miss hell as it had your friends who you got use to….you hoped they were still doing okay down there.
MEANWHILE IN HELL: “OMG OMG I CANT BELIEVE THEY GOT KIDNAPPED…IM A BAD FRIENDDD” “HON DONT WORRY, YOUR DAD CAN FIND A WAY TO GET THEM..” “it’s okay fat nuggets, they’ll come back…” *sad oink* and everyone else is having their own panic moment in their own way.
MEANWHILE BACK IN HEAVEN: “quack.” You said looking up at adam who holds your hand. “Huh? Jeeezzz bird brain..stop worrying about those loser down there…they’re fine without you.” Adam says smirking knowing damn well they aren’t .
Emily holds your hand as you waddle quacking at the ice creams around here. They taste so much better as your eyes sparkle at this sweet flavored treat. Emily squeals as her eyes got big and took a pic of your happy face. Sera most definitely got the picture on her heaven phone as her face soften seeing the new angel in heaven enjoying their self.
I imagine Adam is the one to be the one who claims to be the closest to you. But really he just brags about himself to you about how much sinners he kills.
I headcannon for your wings to be little cute fairy looking wings or pure white ones as you just fly.
You definitely have cherubim in heaven which makes the angels find you more adorable as the delivery boy.
You had made an account literally one day, and instantly you got 2 million followers which made you shock as Adam just munches on snacks while you quack panicked at how quick you became famous here.
I headcannon St. Peter to send you cookies with those cute little penguin designs on it. It looks like Christmas cookies but they are so cute and tasty
Say for example you fell and you couldn’t get up as you’re so rounded 😭 LITERALLY ALL YOU CAN DO IS ROLL AND SQEUAK AND QUACK💗 Adam is laughing as he takes a picture and video for himself before helping you up.
I can imagine Adam and Sera having a schedule out to plan who gets it hang out with you on weeks and days 😭
You liked the herbal tea they had as you waddle around with Adam having a kid leash on you as he just looked bored.
At the end of the week, you were sleeping wearing a whole ass cute gown Adam bought you as he literally dropped it on you with a flustered face seeing your cute smile.
As you slept…Lucifer snuck into heaven and snatched you up leaving a “fuck you” letter to Adam. Don’t even question how he got into heaven. Just be glad he took you.
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servicpop · 5 months
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ITTO ⋆⋆⋆ x sub bottom m!reader
NSFW › itto is oblivious to reader's love for him, virgin itto, size difference, biting/marking, public / outside sex, breeding(?)
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You and Itto were joint by the hip since little kids. You two did everything together. Exploring places you've never seen before, getting in trouble together, playing beetles together, bathing together. Your parents seemed hesitant at first when you brought little Itto over to your house, he was an oni, they weren't sure if Itto would be too rough when playing or would be a bad influence. But as time progressed, your parents eventually realised that Itto was nothing but a big softie who was a too dumb to actually hurt you.
As you grew older, Itto grew taller. Itto was always the taller one but now as you grew into an adult, he practically towered over you. Itto... didn't become any less of an airhead though, he still remained that same dumb softie from years ago.
When he offered you to join his gang, the Arataki Gang, you somewhat willingly decided to join. At first you thought by 'gang' he meant he'd do crimes and whatnot but then you thought about Itto as a person. There was no way he would be capable to make an elaborate enough plan to steal something or do any crime.
When you actually joined, you realised that it was basically just Itto and his friends hanging out but Kuki — the only one who had a semblance of braincells — that it was originally meant to be for people who were shunned out by society. However, in the process of trying to promote the Arataki Gang, due to the lack of intelligence, mischief and trouble seemed to follow the members like lost puppies. You can't count on your fingers how many times you had to bail them out.
Despite all the chaos in the Arataki Gang, you stuck closest to Itto, it was natural, you've been best friends since diapers. However, this evening when the sun of inazuma set, casting an orange and yellow hue on the land below, you and Kuki were strolling along the streets mindlessly. Itto had gone off somewhere with no contact — like he does sometimes — leaving you and Kuki to talk alone. You liked her, she was calmer than the rest and alot more intelligent.
"You like him don't you?"
Her words rang through your head like an achingly high pitched frequency as you stumbled in your step. Did you like Itto? Sure you sometimes fantasised about his big arms wrapping around you and sometimes your heart would race when he flashed you a toothy grin but—
"I notice the way you act around the boss,"
Kuki crosses her arms and leans her weight onto on leg as she looks at you. The cool evening breeze brushes past your face like a small caress and you find yourself speechless, not knowing how to respond. From your lack of words she continues,
"I was going to tell him but... I think its best if you do it yourself."
You force a small nod and she walks away, muttering something about needing to run an errand but her words fall short from your ears. You've never considered it until now how you always felt warm whenever with Itto and sometimes you even dreamt of Itto in ways that you'd never say outloud. Now looking back at how you felt around Itto... you were in love and Itto was completely oblivious to it.
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You and Itto were laying down on a grassy hill, the tuffs of green tickling your back as Itto was settled next to you with his arms crossed behind his head. He was asleep. Itto had fallen asleep after causing whatever sort of mischief and called you over just to lie on a hill with him.
Silence filled the blue sky with the exception of birds chirping and leaves rustling in the wind. It was a secluded spot no one really came to, that's why Itto liked it. Away from all the judge-y eyes and incriminating stares. You watch as his chest rises and falls at a steady pace and you roll over onto your stomach, eyes still glued on Itto.
"I love you, Itto."
The words spill out of your mouth like a running faucet that doesn't shut off. You shuffle almost uncomfortably on the grass and you keep letting your confession roll from your tongue.
"I can't deny that... sometimes I get these dreams where you love me too and—"
It's too embarassing to admit that you've dreamt of Itto holding you and fucking you like there's no end but the implication is there.
"But I'll never say it to your face that I love you... I don't want to ruin our friendship." Your words hang heavy and you stare at Itto as if waiting for him to wake up and catch you but he doesn't. Your gaze falls to the ground, watching the blades of grass move along your arm from the wind. It's a ticklish sensation.
"You love me?"
That familiar hearty chuckle meets your ears and you can feel your whole world pause. Slowly turning your head, you meet Itto's gaze. He's propped up on one arm and he's staring at you with sparkles in his eyes like an oaf. Embarassment colors your cheeks as you quickly turn away; you're not sure how to face him after basically confessing how you've had a crush on him and had lewd dreams about him.
A small yelp is practically forced out of you when Itto wraps his arms around your waist securely, and suddenly he's ontop of you, holding you down. "Dreams? About me? The one and only?" Usually by now you'd groan and roll your eyes but when Itto is pressed against your body, you lose all your will to fight. "Wait wait wait wait, you've got me curious now, is it really that good?" You've always knew that Itto was a virgin, never had romantic partner before, never had a hook-up, nothing. So it was natural for the oni to be curious.
Itto's abnormally large and calloused hands roam and prod at your clothing. He doesn't know what he's doing and its clear from how mindlessly he's tugging at your pants. With a small chuckle, Itto clicks off your belt and pulls down your pants alongside with your boxers. Was he really planning to fuck right in the middle of a grass hill? "Woah, you're really small," you took offense to that and was about to retaliate until you remembered Itto was an oni, he was most likely double your size.
At this point your face was buried in the comfort of your own forearms, protecting yourself from the harsh grass below you. You hear a clink followed by a thud, indicating that Itto took off his belt and was doing the same with his pants. "You're trembling man, are you cold?" It was nice of Itto to ask but, you were mostly trembling in a mix of fear and anticipation. How would his cock actually feel inside of you? Would it be bigger than you expected?
Itto leans in and you feel something big poke at your hole. There was no way that was his cock. You glance back at him and your jaw drops to the floor. He was bigger than you expected, and his red markings trailed all the way to his tip. His hand palms at your ass, spreading it apart as he clumsily lines himself up, sometimes missing. The usually talkative Itto is now relatively quiet, his breathing becoming more exasperated as he slowly pushes inside of you.
It burns. The way he stretches you out and forces you to accommodate for his size burns but also feels addictingly good. His hands grab at your waist, squeezing the soft flesh of your body as he groans quietly. "W–What the hell... you're so tight," His boisterous ego stammers as he becomes a breathy mess, trying to push deeper inside of you. Itto's nails dig into your skin, leaving crescent shapes indents on your hip as his head falls forward. You can feel his dick throbbing inside of you and your body is completely filled with just him.
Without another word, Itto pulls out before slamming back in. He hits right at your prostate, making stars appear in your vision. "Wait Itto slow down! You're too big—" Your whines fail to reach his numb brain; all he can focus on is the way you're sucking him back in every time he pulls out. "A–ah it feels so good," Itto's teeth graze against your shoulder but he tries to resist biting down. What a sweetheart.
You feel him tremble on top of you, like he's resisting the urges to be rough and unforgiving. It was in his nature to breed. His grip tightens on you, and he has his arms firmly wrapped around your body like you're a plushie. Itto's hips piston into you causing a loud slapping sound from your skin making contact with his. He can't help but hold you close, otherwise you'd try to leave him! He's practically drooling all over your shoulder but you're too fucked-dumb to really care.
Itto's teeth finally sink into your shoulder, sucking softly as he marks you as his, "Sorry, can't– help it." His apologies are quiet as he stammers like he's acting against his own will. "Gonna... gonna cum," He whimpers, his fingers digging into your skin. That was sure to leave a mark the next day. You feel a pool of pleasure in your stomach; you're close too. The way he's hitting all the right spots with every thrust made your legs weak. Who would've thought the 'big bad oni' would be whimpering and groaning while fucking you senseless.
This was better than your dreams of him. Instead of having to groggily clean your pants every morning, you're shooting blanks out onto the grass as Itto slams his hips against your ass a few more times. He groans lowly into your ear before orgasming inside of you, filling you up to the brim. You feel his crushing weight suddenly crash down on you as he collapses from the bliss. "Itto! You're too heavy get off," you whine but your protests go unheard by the oni who's dazed out of his mind.
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"What's going on with you two...?"
Kuki blinks blankly at you as she glances from your intertwined fingers with Itto and your blushing face. You weren't exactly the one for big public display of affection but Itto didn't seem to care at all. In fact, he's got you glued to his side with a big smile on his face.
"He's my boyfriend!"
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a/n : big dumb itto ,, luv him
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"We go from store to store, trying to things on and inspecting them. I give my opinions on dresses and shoes, blouses and lipstick colors. Sometimes I say things that make the other women look at me, agape, as though my mouth has been possessed by that flighty queen from Queer Eye even while the rest of my body still looks like any other big dumb boy's. I say that I like a skirt but I wish it were bias-cut instead of A-line, or that I am not fond of the fashion for surplice tops, or that the post-WWII idiom in shoes this season is amusing but rarely looks good on actual feet, or that I like the look of a bolero jacket. I know the names of colors, heliotrope and coral and Nile blue, and I can say without hesitation whether a lipstick might look better matte with a bit of powder.
These other women look at me with wonder, their boyfriends and husbands having made a fetish out of refusing to learn such words under any circumstances, as though merely pronouncing the word "periwinkle" or "princess seam" could easily turn a strong man gay as a box of birds. They say to her, "That's your husband?" in voices that loiter between admiring and disgusted, as though they know that there's no force on earth that could make their men or boys take such interest in their clothing and they think they might really prefer that to the spectacle of me, filling an armchair, legs crossed ankle over knee, looking just right until I say "tea length."
The point is that she wants other girls to see what it looks like to have a boy so cracy in love with you, as I am, that he will spend an afternoon talking about capri pants to have a boy so delighted by you that he never calls you by your name, but addresses you always as "beautiful girl," or "my love" or occasionally and with great fondness, "boss." To have a boy who will happily fetch your next-size-down and carry your bags and charm the salesclerks at the register without flirting overmuch and just generally try to make himself as useful as possible, all for the dizzy and undying pleasure of making you happy. And even though I am not a boy, I look like one, and so I can be complicit with her in this kind of wonderful afternoon, part indulgence of her great beauty and style, part guerilla feminist activism.
Later, when we walk through the mall or down the sidewalk, me laden with packages that are clearly hers, I watch the eyes of the people we pass: the women who look at me with a certain longing, wishing they had their own boys to carry the bags. The men who look at her with an unmistakable hunger, wishing that they had the honor of schlepping for a girl like her, and then look at me with a certain edge of disbelief, not quite clear about why I get to squire this marvelous example of femininity around when they are clearly wealthier, more handsome, better hung. I have learned to meet all of these gazes with a calm kind of sweetness. There's no point in defensiveness or sheepishness or challenge. I'm the one holding her bags."
"Being a Shopping Switch” Butch is a Noun essays by S. Bear Bergman (2006)
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gay-dorito-dust · 3 months
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My mind is racing right now. I’m just imagining targ!reader who is Rhaenyra’s heir and maybe she’s a realms delight (very politically savvy maybe idk) like her mother was and everyone is trying so hard to get her attention but all she wants is Benjicot and he thinks that he doesn’t have a chance so he doesn’t even entertain the thought of it.
Am I Going Crazy?
No you’re not going crazy anon, I totally understand. I’m just shooting at the hip with with one, so it’s gonna be short and something
The moment you were born the realm fell in love with you just as your family did the second you opened your gorgeous eyes and smiled.
The realms delight was a title once given to your mother when she was younger, was a title now being passed down to you. Everyone from greater house, small houses and even the obscure ones wanted to witness you every smile and every laugh however they could, whether it be on your name day, tourneys or otherwise they all clambered to be in your presence.
‘You had the entire realm at your feet, you could convince the dumb cunt lords and their sons into stupidly plunging into depths of death, should you feel like it.’ is what Daemon says often as to remind you just how much of a hold you held over everyone whereas in a way that your mother didn’t. Or at least not anymore.
You lived relativity with more freedom and leniency then most of similar status, which may have less to you being the core envy for some, but in exchange you were taught by Daemon a plethora of things when came to playing your hand in this game of politics and power. He taught you how to wield a sword and how to keep your opponent guessing your next move, so much so that when training with the likes of Jace, Luke or either Baela and Rhaena you were always ten steps ahead.
Much like your mother, you were granted the privilege to seek out whom ever caught your eye when you were of an eligible age for marriage, so when the news that you offering up your hand in marriage the realm was quick to gather their finest men to speak upon why it is that you should choose them over the others. However none of them were to your taste as some were far too young and could barely pick up a sword, far too old and fat from gorging themselves on wine and food, or just didn’t give a good enough reason for you to marry them other then that they could satisfy you; A line that had them shoved out the door as quickly as they came as you tried to swallow down the bile that rose in your throat.
The Riverlands were beautiful but the reason you came to the Riverlands was for one man and one man only, The new lord of house Blackwood, Benjicot Blackwood. So when you didn’t see the stormy eyed man with the dark hair at the hall you couldn’t help but be a little upset, and so had no choice but to internalise the reasons why and forced yourself to listen to the rest of the men in attendance with a forced look of interest, repressing that restless feeling within your chest to go out and search for him yourself on dragon back if you must.
Soon enough you’ve decided to give yourself a break from it all and wander out to explore of the Riverlands, which was where your marriage tour was currently stationed at, and coming to adore all that you could see in their bright and vibrant colours in comparison to back home. There were Fields that stretched on for miles on end onto the horizon with grass a plenty to feed the cattle, small patches of trees where the birds sung and rested their aching wings and fed on the berries they produce.
Meanwhile with Benjicot he didn’t feel as though he had anything to give to you, the heir and delight of the realm. He was a Lord but there were men of far greater houses then his who could provide you more than he could, and in Benji’s mind he shouldn’t even bother to tempt the idea of you choosing him, not when he knew it was a fight he’ll never win from the beginning. So he didn’t and that hurt him far more then he thought as the idea of not trying, or bothering to try at all would become a regret he would be burdened with carrying for the rest of his life; left alone to ponder in his old age as to what could’ve been had he actually tried.
Oscar and Kermit had tried to convince him into doing something about it but even they couldn’t get his stubborn ass to move an inch, and now both Tully boys could only stand and watch as their friend take his frustrations out on a straw training dummy.
‘This is sad.’ Oscar said as Kermit made a noise of agreement.
‘Very sad.’ Kermit replied as Benjicot moved his attention to another dummy after violently disembowelling the previous training dummy as the straw insides spilled out. ‘He’s probably still wishing that Aeron Bracken was that dummy.’ Kermit then adds as he looks over at his brother, who was doing the exact same.
‘I mean the little twat deserved that pummelling earlier for even thinking he had a chance and now he can’t go because his injuries were too severe.’ Oscar snorted in disbelief before adding on, ‘his uncle knew that if he had let Aeron go in his current state, house Bracken would’ve become a laughing stock of the realm.’
Kermit gave a slight chuckle before looking back at Benjicot and his smile fell from his face. ‘He really likes her…’ he trails off as Oscar’s face now becomes crestfallen and sighs. ‘He does and it easts him up inside that even if he did bother to go, he’d just get rejected regardless.’ Kermit was about to add onto that, when something catches his eye, he spotted a figure emerging from the trees and his eyes widened up seeing it was you and proceeded to smack Oscar in the arm repeatedly.
‘Ow, ow, quit hitting me!’ Oscar said and as he went to hit his brother in the arm as retaliation, his eyes too went wide upon seeing you walking towards them casually.
‘It’s the princess!’ Kermit hissed.
‘Of course it’s the princess dipshit, I’ve got eyes that still see!’ Oscar hissed back.
‘Well obviously he doesn’t!’ Kermit barked as he pointed towards Benjicot, not realising that he just pointed you to the person you’ve been wanting to see most. Meanwhile the lord of house Blackwood was all the more obviously to everything happen, being stuck inside his own head and all, that he didn’t see Kermit and Oscar’s frantic looks over at him as he continued to destroy the third training dummy today nor does he know that you were behind him until you spoke up.
‘What did the training dummies do to deserve such anger?’
Benjicot froze up immediately as he looked out of his eyes at Kermit and Oscar, who were just as frozen to the scene before them as him, as he then took a deep breath and looked over to see that his mind hadn’t been playing him a fool and that you -the realms delight and heir to the iron throne- were actually here in the flesh but why?
You couldn’t help but smile at his shocked expression and tense body language, Benjicot was far more handsome up close than you remembered, all the while still being a shy and awkward but honourable nobleman. ‘Are you alright lord Blackwood? You’re looking a little flustered there.’ You said as you gestured to his cheeks which were burning bright red.
‘Princess, shouldn’t you be on your marriage tour?’ Benjicot asked and already he wanted the ground to swallow him for how stupid he sounded.
‘I am but I’ve decided to put it on hold as to stretch my legs.’ You told him and could see his shoulders deflated a little, ‘besides the person I wished to see most hadn’t shown up, and so I thought that since I am in the Riverlands I shall go seek him out myself instead, drag him back to Raventree hall if I must.’ You then added with a smile as Benjicot’s breath hitched in his throat.
‘And if I may ask princess, but who are you looking for?’ He asks as casually as he could but felt a little under pressure from the looks Oscar and Kermit were giving him as they silently routed for him from a few paces away, his heart elevating even quicker when you took a step towards him.
‘You of course.’ You told him straightforwardly. ‘You were the one person I was hoping to see today.’
‘Why?’ Benji found himself asking without second thought on how it came across. ‘Why me, I have nothing to offer you princess, wouldn’t it be better to have a suitor from a greater house to strengthen your own?’ He didn’t want to believe this was real but also he did want to believe that you had sought him out on your own accord. However this felt too good to be reality, it had to be a dream Benjicot was sure of it, for where else would it be plausible for the person you’ve been yearning after to activity search for him during your marriage tour of all things? It wasn’t something that was even remotely grounded in reality but instead a tale found straight out of an old book.
‘Does it matter as to why I sought you out other then the fact that I’d much rather take you a kind, honourable and honest man, as my husband over some fat cunt of a man?’ You replied as you reached for his hands, desperate to have him trust your words as truth while feeling every one of his calluses press into your hands perfectly, as though the gods made them to hold yours specifically. ‘Does it matter that all I wish to marry out of love and not duty as is expected of me? I am free to marry whoever I wish and I wish for you.’ You add, moving your head so that you could still be in Benjicot’s line of sight when he ducks his head to his chest, seeing you smile so sweetly at him and making his heart leap up into his throat.
‘Tis I where your heart lies princess?’ Benjicot asked softly, not trusting to raise his voice more than a whisper, waiting to wake up from this seamlessly perfect dream. Your smile grew bigger as you pressed your forehead against his own to look him deeper into his stormy eyes that bore an expression of vulnerability and uncertainty. ‘Along with my soul and my mind for countless day, yes, you are where my heart lies Benjicot Blackwood.’ You reassured him, watching the internal conflict within him war against one another for a while before there was nothing but a sweet gleam in his eye.
‘You are where my heart lies too princess,’ Benjicot confessed, pressing his head further against yours with a smile, ‘I’d be more than honoured to be yours.’
You were absolutely glowing upon hearing this as you laughed with pure joy and happiness. your search was over, you had found the one you wanted even though you had to find him first, but that didn’t matter as later that day your marriage tour came to an end as your hand happily secured by one Benjicot Blackwood.
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lovelettersfromluna · 10 months
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Hanahaki
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summary: Hanahaki Disease (花吐き病 (Japanese); 하나하키병 (Korean); 花吐病 (Chinese)) is a fictional disease in which the victim coughs up flower petals when they suffer from one-sided love.
an: trying something new with this one, I hope you all like it. Love you mwah mwah (thank you to the anon who inspired this!!)
Warnings: MDNI!, 18+, eventual smut in future chapters, ANGST (when I mean angst, I mean angst girl), loser!Ellie if you squint, reader is oblivious, mentions of fictional illness/disease, mentions of alternative love interest, alcohol usage, marijuana usage, mentions of death, mentions of vomiting (it isn’t graphic I promise it’s literally just flowers), let me know if I missed anything!
You can read part 2 here!!
The sound of different voices and loud giggles replaced the music that was once filling up the old jeep with music, the two sounds dominating each other, creating something that could only be recognized as a group of young, dumb people. The car was dark, and Ellie couldn’t really see anything, not when you were settled on her lap, blocking her view from the outside through the car windows.
She wasn’t complaining, of course she wasn’t. Her hands were wrapped around your waist, keeping you close to her, squished between two other people in your friend group in the back of the car. She was drunk, and high, and she could faintly smell the ocean with each passing moment, the sea breeze growing closer and filling up the stuffy car.
The wind filling up the car blew your soft hair into Ellie’s face, giving her a whiff of your floral shampoo. She couldn’t help but lean in, giving your hips a gentle squeeze as she pressed her nose to your neck, relishing in the feeling of your soft skin against her lips.
You were always her favorite feeling.
She couldn’t even feel it entirely, but the car has stopped. The only reason she knew, was because she felt the spaces next to her become vacant, her friends laughing loudly as they tumbled out of the car and booked it for the beach, sand kicking behind them, nearly falling over their own feet.
She felt you shift in her lap, a soft smile on your lips, pretty eyes just as hazy as her own.
“You comin’ El?” You asked softly, your words like honey on your tongue, music to Ellie’s ears.
She was in a trance, not having seen your pretty face since you and your friends had left the party you were at, all of you packing yourselves away in a jeep and heading to the beach. Every time you looked at her, giving her that soft smile, and those kind eyes, it was like it was the first time she was seeing you all over again.
And you never failed to leave her speechless, even on the simplest occasions.
A loud bang on the roof of the car made her jump slightly, earning a giggle from you.
“C’mon love birds! Or else I’ll drag you out myself” Ellie could decipher the voice to be a friend of both you and her who was the one who’d driven you all out to the beach in the first place.
You giggled softly, scooting off her lap, taking her wrist in your hand and tugging her out of the car. Ellie could barely feel her feet carrying her behind you, watching as you dragged her out to the beach.
The moon was so bright, illuminating the white sand, and the dark, calm waters. Ellie remembers hearing the waves crashing against each other, and the sounds of your friends arguing, giggling with each other as they tried setting up a bonfire, which she hoped wouldn’t get you guys in trouble. She remembers the feeling of your soft hands wrapped around her wrist, she image of you in front of her in nothing but a pair of old denim shorts and a faded out band t shirt that was probably hers.
She recalls the way you tugged her away from everyone else, it was always like that. Somehow, no matter the situation or the occasion, you and Ellie ended up strayed away from everyone else. At parties, sleepovers, any general outing, it was you and her, and no one else. It was like everyone simply knew to leave you two, that your disappearance with one another was inevitable. You were the ring leader, always grabbing Ellie and pulling her away from everyone, wanting her all to yourself.
It made Ellie’s heart swell every single time.
Your small hands would interlock with hers, and she’d know that she was done for. She was yours entirely, whether you knew it or not.
The sand was cold beneath Ellie’s body, her hands sinking further into the powdery substance, deep inhales coming in through her nostrils, the spinning she once felt in the world around her slowly stopped. Her eyes were on the ground, and yours were up at the sky as you sat next to her.
“Do you think there’s anyone out there doing the exact same thing as us right now?” You hummed out softly, palms settled behind you on the sand as you stared up at the stars.
Ellie raised her eyebrows at your question, a soft chuckle leaving her as she moved her green eyes up to stare at the stars with you, mimicking your position.
“Probably…none are like us though” she sighed out softly.
She’d never say anything like that sober. You were always the bold one between you and her. Ellie was shy, and quiet and she’d always blush like an idiot whenever you’d say things like that, or compliment her, or when you’d do anything, really. But it was true, no one, no matter how similar their situation was to you and her, would never come close to what you and Ellie had.
What you and Ellie had was special, it was like buried treasure. It was something that was hard to find, and it was a connection like no other that had ever existed, or ever would exist, and you and her both knew that.
You were Ellie’s treasure.
You giggled softly, nodding at her words. “I agree…none like us…” you agree, eyes still trained on the blanket of stars above.
Ellie felt your hands wrap around her arm, and tug her down to lay back on the sand. She didn’t make any attempt to stop you, allowing you to do with her as you pleased.
You were both laid down, staring up at the stars in silence, simply enjoying each others company with one another. There were no thoughts, no worries, no overthinking, it was just you and her.
And Ellie loved that most about being with you.
Ellie could hear your breathing slowly evening out, the sound of sleep overcoming was familiar to her in you. You’d always been the one to fall asleep first, Ellie took note of that very early on in your friendship, remembering the many sleepovers you’d have where you’d fallen asleep in record time, making Ellie envious of you.
A soft, sleepy hum left your lips, and she could feel you scoot closer to her, tucking your body into the side of hers, your hand going down and interlocking your fingers with hers, pressing your cheek against your shoulder before you looked up at her.
Ellie felt like she’d break when you looked up at her, eyes big and glossy, lashes webbed together. You’d always had the pettiest eyes she’d ever seen, making her heart stop every single time you looked up at her.
“El…” you whispered softly, barely loud enough for her to hear.
She swallows thickly, nervous to keep eye contact with you, or to even speak, fearing that her voice should deceive her and crack, letting you know just how much of a hold you had on her.
She took a deep inhale before giving you a nod. “Yeah?” She replied softly, her voice shaky.
You simply gave her a soft smile, one of your hands coming up and gently tracing over her features. You traced over the outline of her lips, her nose, her eyebrows, her freckles. Ellie sighed softly as you did so, eyes fluttering shut as she leaned into your touch.
A moment passed of this, of you gently touching her face, Ellie close to passing out at any moment from the soft, feather-like touches.
“M’gonna marry you someday….know I will…” you hummed out, your voice dripping with that dreamy, sleepy sound that made it clear how far away you were.
Ellie’s eyes opened at this, her breath hitching in her throat at your confession, your promise. She felt her freckled cheeks burn when she looked down at your sleepy face, a lazy smile on your lips as your eyes grew heavier and heavier with each passing moment.
You had a habit of saying anything that had been plaguing your mind whenever you were tired, in between that blissful state of sleep and wake. It got even worse when you were high, Ellie knew that. You’d admitted the most outrageous things when you were like that.
But never anything like this.
She didn’t even have time to respond, because your eyes were already closed, lips parted as soft snores escaped.
She inhaled deeply, turning her head back to stare up at the sky, trying her best to ignore the burning feeling in her stomach, in her chest, in her heart. It was everywhere, eating her up and demanding to be acknowledged.
You, her best friend that she’d been in love with almost her entire life, had promised to marry her someday.
It was something Ellie knew would follow her for the rest of her life, for as long as she lived. She didn’t know whether to hate you for it, or to love you for it.
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Ellie had know about her feelings for you for a very long time.
She’d go as far as to say it was something along the lines of love at first sight, but she didn’t want to be dramatic.
It was a classic story of playground love, the two of you meeting at a very young age, practically babies, and becoming inseparable from that point on.
Maybe it was the way you had no problems with tugging on the little girls pigtail that kept bullying her. Looking back at it, the kid probably had a crush on her in all honesty, but you had a zero bullshit tolerance policy, even at the age of six years old.
Or maybe it was the way she didn’t hesitate to punch the kid in the nose that pushed you off the swing during recess. It seemed she too had a zero bullshit tolerance policy.
It was always like that. You protected each other, you from idiot boys that picked on you, and her from dumb little girls who were still navigating their feelings, and in that came the bully’s that they grew to be.
So yeah, you and Ellie were stuck to the hip from the moment she could remember. In all of her earliest memories, you were there, a big smile on your face, always rooting for her.
Ellie was a shy kid. Sure, she had a mouth to tell off an idiot whenever she needed to, but she liked being alone. The only person she really liked spending time with was her dad, and what’s wrong with that? Her dad was fucking cool.
You were the complete opposite. You were bright, and loud and confident. You brought colors to Ellie’s life. You talked, and she listened.
And Ellie didn’t want it any other way.
It was like this all throughout school, and into college. You two followed the same education path of course, refusing to be without one another during the cruelest times of a persons life, the disgusting transfer from the life of a child to the life of an adult.
She figured if she was going to be miserable, she’d be miserable with you by her side.
It was like a dream, having you so often? She has the privilege of keeping you by her side all throughout her childhood, and now she had you by her side through her adulthood.
Ellie wanted you all to to herself. She was selfish, she knew that, but how could she help herself? You’d been hers for so long, there was no chance she’d give you up now.
Ellie recalls a rainy night in her car. It was cold, and it was so miserable out that she had no choice but to wait it out a bit before taking you home.
It was a routine night for you two. She didn’t have class that day, so she’d pick you up from your last one, and you’d sleep over at her apartment for the night since it was the weekend.
She looked over at you, soft hums to the quiet music playing in her car coming from your body, your head resting against the window as you drew little patterns with the condensation that had grown on the window.
“What’s on your mind, babe?” Ellie questioned softly.
You weren’t usually that quiet. You always had so much to tell Ellie when she picked you up, or any case for that matter. You were a little fireball, always beaming with something knew you’d learned that day, the grade you got from your professor, or the latest class gossip that you just had to share with Ellie.
But not that day. You were too quiet, made Ellie feel strange.
You hummed softly in response, turning towards her with raised eyebrows. The hoodie you had on framed your face cutely, a few strands of your hair poking out and laying against it. Your eyeliner had bled out a bit throughout the day, Ellie thought you looked pretty either way, though. Your head was resting against the seat, a soft smile on your face as you shook your head.
“Nothin…I just…” you tried, finding it hard to explain yourself.
You let out a gentle huff before turning your body towards Ellie a bit more. The car was dark, the only thing illuminating your face was the street light in the parking lot that you two were in. She could see that your features were soft, tranquil. You looked so genuinely happy, and that expression alone made Ellie’s heart burst with a warmth that consumed her so much, it was almost too much.
“I’ve met someone, El” you admitted, your bottom lip tugged between your teeth as you bit back and excited smile, eyes twinkling in the dim light of her car, glimmering with a kind of happiness that Ellie had never seen before in you.
She felt her chest heave, pain suddenly blooming throughout her body.
It’s something she’s never felt before. It’s ugly, and nasty, and raw. It feels like when you have a cold, and your lungs are in a constant state of disgust, that gross sore feeling spreading throughout them. She feels exasperated, like you’ve just broken the worst news she could’ve ever received on a rainy Friday night.
You frown softly, a gentle pout on your lips as you reach over, grabbing her arm gently and giving her a shake.
“Ellie? Did you hear what I said?” You ask softly, trying to break your friend away from whatever has a hold on her.
But she’s frozen, and she can feel her eyes burning from a lack of blinking, and from the tears that are prickling at the back of her throat. She could feel the way you grabbed her, shaking her gently, it almost isn’t enough to bring her back from her own personal state of hell that your words have sent her to, a place where you’re gone, taken away by someone else.
Someone that isn’t her.
It does anyways. She blinks her eyes a few times, clearing her throat as her eyes focused on you. She gives you a nod, green eyes big and wide like she’s seen a ghost.
You giggled softly, moving back to rest your head against the seat as you stared at her.
“Been meaning to tell you…she’s…she’s so great, Ellie…she makes me feel…” you let out a dreamy sigh, your eyes drifting down to look at your hand, which is toying with the bracelet around your wrist, a shy smile on your face as you practically beamed down at it.
Ellie’s eyes silently follow, catching eye of the way your sweater pushed up a bit to reveal the little pink rope that’s around your wrist. She’d never seen it, and it’s perched right under the bracelet that Ellie had made you when you two were kids. Hers is blue and purple, and far prettier in her opinion.
Her heart hurts at the sight of someone else’s bracelet on your pretty wrist.
She stared down at it for a while before her eyes drift up to your face. She could see the warmth spread across your face, radiating from your chest, from your fucking soul. It’s like the you’re smiling down at the fucking bracelet is making you so warm, that it’s warming up the car and wafting Ellie in the face.
It’s love. Ellie can see it.
And you deserve it. God, you’ve always fucking deserved it. You deserve a great big house, someone who loves you dearly coming home to you every night, showering you in all of the love and affection that you have ever wanted and needed. You deserve someone who shows you off, someone who’s proud of everything you do, even the small, stupid things that don’t fucking matter. You deserve someone who cherish you every day as if you’re a fucking gem, a one of a kind gem that only appears once every thousand years.
But fuck…Ellie always wished that person would’ve been her.
She knows she can’t dwell on it, because you’re simply doing what any young person looking for love does. You went out and found someone else, you found someone that makes you smile like that, the way you were smiling across from Ellie in her car.
She can’t be selfish, not now.
Ellie inhales deeply before she puts on her best, most believable smile, freckled cheeks rounding out as she gave you a nod.
“She sounds great…you’ve gotta introduce us someday” she sighed out softly, putting on her best cover up to hide the disappointment she felt deep within her soul.
It’s the way your face beamed even further when you looked up at her, eyes twinkling like the brightest star, the most expensive diamond in the fucking world, that makes Ellie weak in the goddam knees. It’s like all you’ve wanted was her approval, like the main thing holding you back from telling her about the lucky girl that has her heart, is fear that she wouldn’t approve of her.
And that look, further cemented Ellie’s decision in swallowing down her stupid feelings, and ignoring the hammering pain in her lungs.
“Yeah…yeah I will” you promised, giving her a nod, that big, beautiful smile still on your lips.
Ellie can barely bring herself to indulge in the pain she feels, because you looked so fucking happy, and that’s all she’d ever wanted, was for you to be fucking happy.
She smiled back at you, giving a nod before she craned her neck down a bit, looking up at the sky and seeing that the rain had gone from a heavy pour, to a subtle drizzle.
Ellie gave soft hum, nodding to herself as she turned the key to her car to turn it on.
“Looks like it’s let up a bit…let’s get you home-“ her words were cut off but a nasty cough ratting through her lungs, worse than any cold or any blunt had every brought to her. She brought her fist up to her lips, covering it up. It brought tears to her eyes, made her cheeks red. You frowned deeply at the sight, bringing your hand up to rub her back gently.
“Shit…you catching a cold, El?” You questioned softly, concern laced in your words.
Ellie cleared her throat, shaking her head as she straightened her back out.
“Nah…all the smoking I’ve done is probably catching up to me” she joked with a soft chuckle before she looked at you, giving you a soft smile.
“Let’s get you home” she hummed out softly before she pulled out of the parking lot and began making her way to your apartment, not hers.
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At first, Ellie didn’t really think much of it.
She assumed that she was simply coming down with a cold, or her excuse to you was right. Maybe all the blunts she’d smoked had finally caught up with her. Her father had always told her they would.
She had thought of everything. The flu, pneumonia, bronchitis, everything in the goddamn book, but every time she went to her doctor with the concern of any of them, he simply shrugged, gave her a gentle smile and told her she was as healthy as could be.
But the cough never got better.
It was annoying at first, her throat was scratchy, and most days she’d be able to simply clear her throat to alleviate the discomfort. Cough drops would help, a cup of tea her and there, soothing the ache she felt her and there throughout the day.
But then? Came the flowers.
Ellie almost keeled over and died when one day she was having a particularly violent coughing fit, forcing her to stay in from class. When she looked down into the her tissue and she saw a few pieces of…something? Little pieces of something pink and white, a bit withered. she flinched, throwing the napkin on her coffee table.
At first, it looked like she’d coughed up a peace of her fucking lungs. She wasn’t sure who to call, her dad? 911? Fucking poison control? She wasn’t even sure that it was even possible to cough up an entire piece of her body.
After a few moments, she figured she had to further inspect the foreign objects to figure out just what it was that had exited her body. She reached down with shaky hands, her eyebrows furrowed with concern, picked up the tissue and opened it up.
She squinted her eyes a bit as she looked down at the little things, trying to figure out what the fuck could leave a persons body that looks like it. Her eyes went wide when she touched it, realizing what they were.
Flower petals.
Ellie thought she might’ve been hallucinating at first. Maybe she took an edible and forgot or something, or maybe the cough medicine was making her trip balls, because flower petals? There’s no fucking way, right?
Apparently she was wrong. There was a way, and a quick google search was filled with something that Ellie didn’t want to find.
All she had to do that night, was look up her symptoms, and she was finally faced with why her lingering cough had been so lingering, and what had caused it.
Hanahaki disease.
It was an illness that affected those with a broken heart, those who experienced unrequited love, which resulted in a painful cough that brought up a never ending supply of flower petals. It would explain the constant lingering taste of perfume that Ellie had suddenly found was impossible to get out of her mouth, and it would explain the fact that this so called ‘cold’ of hers that she had wouldn’t go away, and only had a cough with no other symptoms.
It made Ellie realize, that the night that all of this started, was the night that you told her you’d found somebody else, and it suddenly made so much sense.
Ellie was coughing up fucking flowers, because you didn’t love her.
After finding out what it was that she was diagnosed with, the second step was to find a cure, which she found to be much harder than finding the disease itself.
Finding a cure only came with various medical articles of people who had suffered from the same disease that she was suffering from. All people experiencing the same pain and heartache that she’d been carrying for so long.
All of which, had died.
Each and every other person who had this disease, had passed away from the disease, ultimately dying from a lack of love from the person they wanted.
This scared Ellie.
However, recent study had shown a new surgery that was available with those who suffered from the disease. One that would remove the flowers from the lungs and stop the cough entirely.
But it would also remove any and all feelings that the person with the disease had for the person they loved.
So, Ellie had two choices. Either she let the disease linger until she fucking died, or she could get the surgery, live, and never have you in her life again, not like before at least.
She had a big decision to make.
That night, Ellie cried. She curled up in a little ball in her bed, her pillow pressed against her face as she muffled out her noises, and she cried. She was in pain, and she was hurting, and she wanted it all to go away.
She wished you’d love her, she wished you would’ve just noticed how much she wanted you, how she was the right one for you all this time. It made her angry, and confused and annoyed, because what did she do to deserve this? To deserve this godforsaken illness that she had never fucking asked for.
And as she cried, and screamed and groaned out for the pain to go away, she heard her phone go off. She grabbed it, a soft sniffle leaving her nose as her tear filled eyes stared up at the bright screen of her phone.
It was you.
Loser!!! I rlly hope you didn’t forget to come and get me
I’m sleeping over tonight remember???
Come and get me soon hehe :p miss u
And although Ellie was in pain, and her heart was hurting. She’d never, ever say no to you.
She could live with the cough for a little bit longer, as long as it meant she got to be with you.
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Ellie was only getting worse.
Months had gone by, and before she knew it, it had almost been a year with this goddamn disease that she had.
Her doctor had put her on some medication, which basically suppressed the cough only slightly. She still experienced handfuls of flower petals hacking up her throat every time she coughed. He urged her to get the surgery, telling her that without it, her condition could become life threatening.
But she couldn’t. She needed more time with you.
That’s the deal she had made with herself. She would get the surgery after she’d had enough time with you, allowing herself to make lasting memories with you when soon, she’d feel nothing for you at all.
But it was never enough time.
She wanted you always. Day, night, morning, evening, whatever the time she wanted you.
And things were fine. She had hoped you didn’t notice her health slowly deteriorating, she’d hoped you didn’t notice the bags under her eyes or the way the color had been sucked from her skin. You never questioned it, so she hoped that was all true.
She ignored the girl you’d met. After that night in her car, you and that girl never separated. You tried telling Ellie about it from time to time, and Ellie had even met her a few times. Her name was Jen, and she was the furthest fucking thing from Ellie, which only further solidified how unrequited her love was.
It hurt, because Jen was great. She was so kind, and beautiful, and she clearly treated you the way Ellie knew you needed to be treated. Ellie wished she could’ve hated her, she wished she was a shit girlfriend so that she could talk you out of being with her.
But she couldn’t, because Jen was perfect for you.
Ellie ignored it all, treating the times that she had with you as if it was only you and her in the world. She always had, but now it was different, now it was pretty crucial that she had these moments with you, even if you didn’t know the half of it.
You never pulled away, or became distant due to the new aspect of your life that was your relationship. You made time for everyone in your family, and you made time for Ellie. It was all too perfect, the way you handled it all. You never abandoned her, or made her feel left out.
Your friendship had never changed with Ellie, it stayed the same throughout everything.
But her condition was getting harder and harder to hide. She had to constantly rush to the bathroom when she felt the burning in her lungs, and the smell of flowers fill her nose and her mouth, muffling her coughs with a towel. She had gone from coughing up a few petals to what could only be described as an entire fucking bouquet.
It was hard, having to hide it from you. She knew that if there was anyone that could help her through this, through one of the hardest and most painful times of her life, it was you. You would’ve been there by her side, staying up every night that she was having coughing fits to help her, nursing her back to health. You always had, whenever she was sick, you were there, playing nurse while Ellie groaned and pouted for you. She became so needy when she was ill.
But she couldn’t, not when you were the one that caused this.
She knew you’d drop everything for her, and abandon everyone else for a lost cause, because no matter how much medicine you gave her, no matter how much you held her in her sleep, the disease that plagued Ellie had no cure that you could bring.
Other than loving her back.
Ellie sighed softly as she walked through the door of her apartment, pushing her headphones off of her head and letting them rest on her neck. The weather was finally warming up, and she could only hope that the warmth would treat her cough a bit kinder than the cold did, which she knew deep down was merely wishful thinking.
She meant to text you that week, having not heard from you in a bit, which was very unlike you.
She bent down, picking up the mail that laid on her entrance way mat, sifting through the bills and various envelopes that had her name on it. She was quick to toss them to the side, perfectly fine with waiting until she had the energy to read them all properly.
But she stopped when she saw a pretty, powder pink envelope with your writing on the front, her name written out so perfectly.
Why the hell were you sending her a letter?
A nasty cough rattled through her chest, and she almost laughed because it had gotten to a point where any mention of, even in the confides of her own mind, brought on a coughing fit these days. Even the sight of your writing made the ugly sound rake through her lungs.
Pathetic.
She sighed softly, moving to her couch and tossing her backpack to the side. She sat down, ring clad fingers turning the envelope around to tear it open.
The paper inside is thick, it feels expensive, like those fancy cards you get for birthdays from old people that don’t know any better but to buy their grandkids the best shit.
It has little embroidery’s on the edges, and it’s lined with the smallest strip of silver. It’s all written in cursive, and her eyes scan over it for a moment, eyebrows furrowed at whatever the fuck it was that you had randomly sent her in the mail.
But her heart is stopping, and her eyes are going wide once they finally focus on the bigger words at the top.
It’s a wedding invitation.
It’s your wedding invitation.
In her hands, Ellie was holding yours and Jen’s wedding invitation.
And she suddenly can’t breathe. There’s a burning in her chest, and she’s faced with the most intense coughing fit she’s experienced in her entire fucking life. It doesn’t stop, and it isn’t even giving her a chance to breath. She can feel her lungs shaking at how violent it is, and she suddenly throws the invitation down and she’s rushing to the bathroom, hunching over the toilet where her coughing turns into vomiting.
Her vision is blurred with tears, but she can make out the image of the familiar petals filling up the bowl, rattling through her body and making it hard to breath. She’s choking, and crying, and heaving, and it’s the worst thing she’s felt in her entire life.
She feels like it won’t end, like she’ll die right then and there, but she doesn’t. It stops, and she’s left sobbing as she falls back, her back hitting the bathroom wall, knees coming up as she holds herself, her sobs and cries bouncing off the bathroom walls, loud enough to surly be heard throughout her entire floor.
It’s that night, the night where she received your wedding invitation, that Ellie scheduled the surgery date, because she can’t do this anymore.
She needs to let you go.
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shycoconutt · 3 months
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It seems when it comes to Nanami Kento, your body has a mind of its own.
Because here you are standing like an idiot, with a brown bag containing various warm pastries and a cup of black coffee, alone in his office in the early hours of the morning, feeling like you’ve fought and won many battles but are currently losing the war.
The war that was once your past and now, to your dismay, is your present too.
The sun has just barely peaked over the mountains, a warm orange glow cascading through the windows of Jujutsu Tech. Placing your offerings on his large wooden desk, you can’t help the exaggerated sigh that escapes your lips.
What has gotten into you.
The entire walk from your apartment, to the bakery, then to work at 8 o’clock in the morning was spent mumbling and grumbling to yourself.
Whatever happened to keeping your distance? Standing your ground? Huh? So what if today’s his birthday? So you happen to know his order at his favorite bakery across town, who cares? Huh? Hello? Are you listening to me—
You probably have a red mark on your forehead from how many times you slapped yourself on the way over here.
Truth is, you know it’s dumb, but the thought of not one person wishing Kento a happy birthday or giving him a gift today makes your stomach hurt. He only just reinstated himself as a sorcerer a couple months ago, and it’s highly likely that no one else but you remembers the importance of this summer day.
Your face warms slightly thinking about teenage Kento and that stupid party hat Satoru forced him to wear for the duration of your class singing him happy birthday. He stood there like an emotionless toothpick. It was hilarious.
Smiling to yourself, you grab a pen and a single sheet from his notepad laid out on his desk and scribble a few words before leaving it there and exiting his office.
~
“Ino,” you yell from your seat on a bench at the sparing field, “you gotta keep your fists close to your chest in a defensive position when fighting. The reason you keep getting knocked over is because you’re leaving yourself wide open.”
With your arms outstretched over the back of the bench, you lift up your head to feel the warm sun rays on your face. It is a hot one today, and you somewhat regret telling your students that you would be working on combat outside all day.
Your decision came mostly because they need the practice, but partly because you know it’s easier to avoid Kento this way.
Five hours into the day, however, you know you have to give your students a break.
“Okay everyone,” you say, clapping your hands together, “why don’t you all take an hour for lunch and then meet back here. When you get back, each of you will take turns sparing with yours truly.”
You giggle at the mix of excited gasps and disappointed groans from your students. They know you won’t go easy on them, and that only excites a select few.
“Yeah, yeah, I know. Though, to make up for it, I stashed some goodies in the fridge for you guys in the rec room…”
You blinked and your students were gone, only leaving a small trail of dust in their path. Feeling content in your solitude, you go back to basking in the sun, the soft noise of running water and chirping birds lulling you into a state of relaxation.
You about jump out of your own shoes when you hear someone softly clearing their throat behind you.
Looking over your shoulder, your eyes trail up the stone steps before you lock on a broad figure standing at the top of them, slicked back honey blonde hair threatening to tousle in the strong breeze.
“May I join you?”
No. Nope. Get lost.
“Uh, sure!”
Damn it.
Scooting over to one side of the bench to make room, you nervously fidget with your hands, suddenly very interested in the state of your cuticles.
In your peripheral, you notice he’s dressed lighter than usual. Instead of the tan suit, blue long sleeve dress shirt combo, he has on a pair of brown slacks with a linen tan short sleeve dress shirt. He looks really good.
Then again, he always looks good. Ever since his return, it was no surprise to you that his everyday wear was so formal. Nanami always had an affinity towards proper aesthetics. He holds himself at a higher standard than most and always feels morally obligated to do the right thing.
But, sometimes there is no right or wrong, sometimes the right choice for you is the wrong one for someone else, sometimes the right choice is the easier choice, the one that hurts less.
As he moves to sit next to you, you feel yourself hold your breath.
“The kids flew by me on the way here practically foaming at the mouths,” Nanami muses.
“Yeah, well, I bought them some candy and snacks from 7/11 this morning cause I walked past and knew I would be putting them through the wringer today. It’s honestly the least I could do. They’ll be hurting pretty good later.”
Nanami hums all-knowingly, smirking to himself.
“If memory serves me right, there were plenty of nights back in the day where I would have to take hours-long episome salt baths just to be able to fall asleep that night after a training session with you.”
You can’t help but smile and hum in amusement.
“You never were the best at hand-to-hand. However, once you started bringing blades and shit into the mix, I did often fear for my life.”
“I would have never hurt you, you know that,” Nanami scoffs.
“Yeah,” you pause, “at least with your blade anyway.”
You feel the air still around you. Nanami now leans himself back on the bench, lifting his hands behind him to support his head.
“Hm, I suppose I deserve that.”
“Sorry, I shouldn’t…”
“However, what I do not deserve is your kindness,” Nanami states, staring at the field in front of him.
“Hm?”
“You bought me my favorite breakfast today, isn’t that correct?”
You turn to him now, feeling a warm blush rise to your cheeks.
“Yes.”
“And this is the most we’ve talked in a long time.”
“I suppose.”
“I half expected you to yell at me to go away.”
“I thought about it.”
Nanami smiles at this, turning to look at you for the first time, amber eyes looking down softly into yours.
“Thank you, darling. I loved it.”
The genuineness of his words swallow the world around you. You feel your heart lurch, and it’s painful.
Sitting here, so close to his form, you feel like you are two magnets. You wish you could just let go—let yourself give in. You want so badly to fly across the seat and have him absorb you. All of the empty parts of your soul are vacant because of him, and he could fill those crevices so easily, right where he once was so long ago.
You give him a sad smile, reaching your arm out, you bring the palm of your hand gently to his face, letting your thumb graze the skin of his cheek.
“You’re welcome, Kento.”
You allow yourself to touch him like this, but this is as far as you can go, at least for right now. Something you know he understands.
“Hey! Nanami is here!” Ino’s voice brings you out of your trance. You look up to see your students gathered together with all of the snacks, candy and drinks you got them in their hands. You quickly pull your hand away from Nanami so they don’t see.
You beam up at them.
“What are you guys doing back so soon?”
“Well we saw all the stuff you got us and decided it wouldn’t be right to eat all of it and not share some with you. You’re out here working hard too!”
“Aw, thanks you guys,” you smile, “Actually, you know what? This is perfect!”
Leaping up from your spot, you grab Nanami’s hand and gesture for him to stand up with you. He complies reluctantly.
“We can all share our spoils with our BIRTHDAY BOOOOOY!”
Nanami glares at you like you just told them his deepest, darkest secret. You give his hand a small squeeze before letting go, smiling up at him devilishly.
The kids are a blur as they gather around him, practically suffocating him with their enthusiasm. You watch as he battles any signs of joy as they jostle him around.
“HAPPY BIRTHDAY NANAMIIIIIIIIIIIIIN!”
413 notes · View notes
eustasskidagenda · 11 months
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anon asked: Hi! I just read your Kid, Zoro, Law & Sanji hc with a s/o afraid of having sex and I just loved it! Your writing is amazing and I really enjoyed it. I struggle with vaginismus so I pretty much know how stressful this situation could be. But I’m actually curious to request you the same hc but with much BIGGER boys, especially Doflamingo, Crocodile and Katakuri. Please feel free to add other big men bc I honestly can’t get enough of them.😭😭😭
Hi hi! So I feel really dumb because I accidentally deleted the request, but luckily, I had copied/pasted the text of my doc before. But sorry, anon D: Anyway, thank you so much for liking my work and for requesting! That was pretty fun to write. I decided to add King and the sweet Corazon. And before starting, please have a look at this, lol. Those guys are so BIG, help.
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☆Doflamingo, Crocodile, Katakuri, King & Corazon with a s/o afraid of having sex
CW (generals) : smut, MDNI, v!sex, f!reader, oral sex (reader receiving), fingering (reader receiving), size kink
WC : Oh my God, I got carried away... 4,3k. Enjoy. :D
⇢ You can read the part one here & the part three here
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Doflamingo
CW : a lot of teasing, creative use of devil fruit, slight praise, slight dirty talk, unprotected sex, pet name
Doflamingo is, let's say, complicated. Of course, he considers you as a part of the Donquixote family, and he cares deeply about his close ones. But, on the flip side, he can't help but love when people are stressed or afraid because of him. It plays with his constant need for dominance. So first, he would grin, almost laugh, and be extremely pleased with himself. "My poor little bird is afraid… because of my size?" While running his fingers along the length of his cock through his pants. "I'll make it good for you, don't worry, just leave it to me." 
Doflamingo craves dominance, so he would be more than satisfied with this situation, his eyes roaming over your body with eagerness. He's a really patient man and also loves to play and tease you all the time. "Lay down comfortably on the bed." He would say, placing his heavy, large hands on either side of your hips, slowly pushing you down on the mattress, his eyes shining with nothing but pure desire. 
He loves how tiny your body looks when he's towering over you. It makes you look so vulnerable. Oh, sure, he loves when his s/o is smaller than him. Again, it plays with his constant need of domination. He finds it fascinating that he could destroy you with one hand. Luckily, you're his precious bird, so he would probably play with you and inflict some pain on you, but only what you're able and willing to take.
His hands would be surprisingly feather-light while running all over your body, tracing all of your curves, and fondling your breasts. Then, pinching your nipples, rolling them between his thumb and index, delighted by all of your shivering and sighs. 
"Mh, you're so needy, y/n" with a low, teasing laugh as he slowly runs his fingers down your trembling thighs, tracing along the sensitive skin before slowly, really slowly reaching for your wet folds. He would smile, his eyes fixed on your pussy, fascinated by how needy you are already for him. But that's not enough. He is eager for more. "So pretty" 
He would begin to tease you mercilessly, tracing soft patterns on your inner thighs and lower-belly. He likes to play with anticipation. He's not the kind of man who just roughly and mechanically slides his fingers inside you. Without teasing, there's no fun.
The more you squirm and moan, the more he's pleased, watching your pussy becoming more and more wet. 
"So eager already." Purring close to your ears, making you shiver even more, leaving a trail of goosebumps along your spine. "What should I do now? What do you want y/n, my tongue or my fingers?" 
You'll have both in the end, so don't worry.
It's clear that Doflamingo has mastered using his long tongue. And the same applies to his fingers always fidgeting when he uses his devil fruit. He's probably a master when it comes to fingering and oral sex. So he would slowly sink between your thighs, licking your soft skin before finally allowing you to feel his tongue against your sensitive folds, keeping your thighs open enough for him with his heavy hands. 
You just can't help but arch your back as he eats you out, turning you into a whining and moaning mess. He would drink your juice as if it was a precious wine. "That's it", humming against your slit, licking your clit. Slowly, he would slide a thick finger inside of you. His mind would probably be a bit dizzy, thinking about how good he would feel with his cock inside of your tightness.
"You're so responsive, little bird," before adding another finger and hitting that sweet spot, still licking your clit.
And he won't stop until you cum all over his tongue and fingers. "Good girl" 
With eyes darkened with desire, he would finally removing his pants, his heavy and extremely long cock springing free, leaking in pre-cum and twitching in anticipation. You can't help but look at his length, stressed. "Do you like looking at my big cock, little bird? Does it turn you on to know that I'm going to fuck you senseless?" So sure, he would grin again before lying on his back and letting you ride him. 
He perfectly knows how to control himself so he won't just push roughly while you line your pussy with his cockhead, trying to brace yourself-up. You definitely want to do it, but you feel nervous. "Need some help, little bird?" 
As you nod, he would use his devil fruit to guide you. With one broad hand wrapping around your waist and the other guiding the strings, he would slowly force your hips to move down, impaling you on his breathtaking thickness, his eyes sparkled with mischief. That's the moment you would see him lose his grin as he can't handle how tight and wet you feel all around him. "So tight…" 
"You can take more?" As long as you tell him to keep going, he would continue to guide your hips down his length, groaning softly, with his hand fondling the flesh of your waist. "That's it, take it, take it all."
As you start to moan, he would say "What's up little bird, you love how well I am stretching you?"
And as you slowly get used to his cock stretching your walls, his cock throbbing inside you, Doflamingo would nicely use his strings to guide you moving up and down, delighted by the sloshing noises. The way your core swallows his length would be mind-blowing for him. The sight of your wetness covering his cock every time you move up and down is something he would love to see more often. Be prepared to entertain your king again.
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Crocodile 
CW : slight domination kink, praises, he's smoking because well it's Crocodile, oral sex (Crocodile receiving), slight hair pulling, using of his hook in a slight creative way but nothing extreme, belly bulge, unprotected sex
Another DILF and dominant man. 
Crocodile is a silent man. So the second you tell him you're nervous because it's been a while since the last time you had sex and that you're also nervous because he's both long and thick, he would just raise an eyebrow. Just like Doflamingo, he would love the feeling of you being intimidated, because Crocodile definitely has a thing (and a kink) for dominance. He likes when you acknowledge his rank and qualities.
"You're afraid because of my size?" 
He would lead your hand until you reached his cock. "If you're nervous, then you have to become familiar with it." So he would feel the girth and the veins, breathing deeply, delighted by the sight of your small hands trying to correctly wrap his thickness. "That's it, y/n. Touch it and get used to it. Soon, it will be all within you."
He would talk with his usual deep, raspy, and calm voice, the one that always sends shivers down your spine. And sure, he would act all dominant, smoking his cigar while you try so hard to satisfy him. Of course, he would look down at you. You are in his hands. So let go of all your intrusive thoughts and just focus on him. Only him.
"Suck it." 
He would watch closely as you try to wrap your tongue around his cock, tracing all the veins, and licking hungrily all the pre-cum leaking from his cockhead. He would grab a hand from your hair with his heavy and broad hand, leading your head back and forth, while watching you drool and struggle to breathe all over his cock. He would slowly lose his composure, sighing huskily, unable to handle how cute you look with your mouth full of his cock, trying to figure out how to take more of his length. He would find the sight of his member glistening with your saliva to be quite entertaining. 
"That's a good girl. Come get your rewards."
The moment he blows out his cigar and removes his rings, you know the real deal is about to start. 
He would likely use his large hook, carefully running the sharpened tip along the soft skin of your stomach. Before slowly leaving a trail of kisses along your neck. Avoid running your hands through his hair and stay still like the good girl you are. Otherwise, he might punish you with a hard pinch on your nipple and a rough slap on your ass cheeks.
Slowly but surely, then, he would reach your inner thighs and then your pussy. He would eat you out with his hand holding your thighs apart. He would you lick your pussy in a classy way, not like a vulgar starving. He would be fond of all your moaning and incoherent mumbling as you can't handle how good it feels. "You won't cum until I say so." While circling your clit with his thumb, teasing you, drinking your juice. Your shivering and tremblings are both entertaining and satisfying. Crocodile rarely goes down on someone, but when he does… oh, it's quite mesmerizing. 
"Stay still" if you start to squirm because of how good it feels.
And, once you're finally reduced to a whining mess, he would use his hook to grab one of your thighs, pushing them apart, spreading  your legs wide enough to fit in between. "Spread your legs for me." He would put a pillow under your back while manhandling you. And then, again, he would use his hook to slightly raise your upper body, until your pussy is lined with his cock.
"Can you take it?" 
He would enter you in one go as soon as you nodded. Not in a forceful way, but he doesn't see the point of taking a lot of breaks. Once his cock is buried deep inside you, he will soothe your trembling thighs by running his hand along your lower-stomach, feeling the bulge created by his cock. "Good girl. You're taking me so well." He would likely hold your legs tightly, trying to fight his own desire to fuck you roughly.
He's a patient man, so he'll wait until you're ready for him to start thrusting.
So deep and slow at the same time while he stretches you further, his cock throbbing and twitching. Not a grunter, but a pretty deep breath as you tighten around him. For this occasion, he will spare you from his usual roughness. But next time… you better be ready.
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Katakuri
CW : The reader is smaller than him, but there's not a BIG size difference, food play, unprotected sex
"I know, love." Yes, he would speak before you even have time to express your fears. Blame it on his haki. Katakuri has a lot of sisters, so he would be well-aware of those kinds of thoughts. If you're nervous, he would take some time to ask why, making sure to fully understand the situation. 
"I'll take care of you, everything will be alright." Despite his lack of words, you have faith in him. He's aware of the future, so if he says it's going to be fine, you can trust him and it's already really soothing.
The Sweet Commander is a gentleman and he's aware of size. He would never just slam into you, especially not if you're already afraid. Before even thinking of reaching for your pussy, he would start with a lot of soft kisses all along your neck, and then on your breasts, sucking on your nipples, pinching them nicely. He just loves your breasts. They feel soft under his palms. He could spend hours worshipping your chest. As you slowly arch your back, moaning softly, and relaxing under his touch, he would continue to kiss your stomach, honoring every inch of your body.
You're so beautiful. Despite his quietness, his eyes would be brimming with pride. Being intimate with such a beautiful woman like you fills him with pride. "You're doing great." 
His voice would always be calm and deep, as usual. The control he has over himself is quite mesmerizing. 
And well, Katakuri probably has a food play kink, so he would love to devour your body covered in cream. So intoxicating. Your body tastes amazing. The taste of sugar is also amazing. Both? Total heaven.
He would then sink his head between your thighs, eating you out like your pussy was one of his dearest donuts. He'd like nothing more than to please you, so feel free to guide him. Katakuri being both smart and observant, he would quickly learn all of your sweet spots, turning you into a whiny moan, begging for more. 
If you don't tell him to stop, he could eat you out for hours. He can't help it; it feels so good and you taste so good. He would drink your juice, circling your clit with his thumb and wouldn't stop until you cum against his lips. 
"So good." 
He would take advantage of your wetness and dizzy mind from your orgasm to slowly push one thick and long finger inside you. It's so tight and warm that he would struggle to keep his calm composure. Especially because his haki showed him some really nice pictures of what's going to happen. 
As long as you need him to continue, Katakuri would honestly just pamper you with kisses and caresses. He knows how big he's, so you have to tell him when you're ready to take him. 
Katakuri would keep your thighs apart with an impatient hand, exposing your wet folds to his eyes. He would look hungrily. His cock twitching crazily in impatience, leaking in anticipation. "You're ready?" 
He already knows the answer, but Katakuri is a gentleman and cares a lot about consent. It doesn't matter if his observation haki shows him everything in advance.
Katakuri would intertwine his fingers with yours before slowly easing his cock into you in one go. A slow, but steady one. And as he fills you up to the brim, he would lose his composure and sigh in relief. Your pussy feels like heaven around his cock. It's a perfect blend of tightness, warmth, heat, and wetness. "Y/N, you feel amazing." 
He would adjust his pace to what you're capable of. If you need him to slow down, he will. And he would be more than happy to comply if you asked him to be rougher. He is here to satisfy you. And you will be satisfied. Reduced to a shivering, moaning mess. The way his fat cock slowly slides in and out and hits all your sweet spots is just too good. It's such a delight to see the big, stoic Katakuri looking his composure because of your body…
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King
CW : The reader is smaller than him, but there's not a BIG size difference, kind of blindfold kink I guess (?), slight spanking, unprotected sex
Even with you, King doesn't like to show his face. He struggles with intimacy. Your confession would make him feel embarrassed. What is he supposed to do? He was about to fuck you without any further thought, but now he needs to take more consideration. 
He would slap your thigh with a sigh. "Turn around." 
While slowly lying on your stomach and complying, he would slowly remove his heavy mask, running a hand through his beautiful white hair. But you don't have the right to watch. The only thing you're allowed to do is imagine. You've already seen his face. So you close your eyes and imagine his beautiful, almost mesmerizing beauty in your mind: brown skin, white hair, and an expression that is both cold and determined. 
He would make you feel. Feel his mouth licking and kissing your spine, leaving a trail of goosebumps. Wet kisses. His hair would softly caress your skin as he devoured the back of your neck, his big hands roaming along your waist to keep you steady. "Stay still" he would always speak with his lips near your ear, enjoying all of your shivering.
And suddenly, he would yank your panties or just push them asides, eating you out from behind, spreading your thighs. "Get on your all fours," he would command, just to have a better view of your glistening folds, before sinking back between your legs. He would keep your cheeks spread and lap at your pussy, intoxicated by your moans, your taste, smell, and how you feel against his lips. You're arched for him, exposed, so beautiful. 
Even if he eats you out, he would love to spank your ass every time you squirm, forcing you to stay still. "Don't move and let me eat you out." He can sense that you're tense. And he doesn't understand why because usually, he can slide into you with ease. But he would take his time, fingering you, rubbing your clit, turning you into an almost crying, whimpering mess. 
He would obligingly ignore his cock, twitching and throbbing in anticipation, taking his time to work on your tightness, stroking your back. "Shh, it's alright, we'll take our time."
He would love to watch how beautiful you are, with your ass up and chest against the mattress, and your head buried in a pillow. What a stunning sight. The way your pussy is messing up on the bedsheets is quite stunning. 
He would use the fact you're unable to see him to his advantage, teasing you, running his fingers along your slit, then rubbing his cockhead, mixing his pre-cum with your wetness. "Please…" 
Please keep begging, it's a lullaby to his ears.
And finally, he would grab your hips firmly, filling you up to the hilt in one go, hitting your cervix. He would fight against his own desire to destroy you by digging into your soft flesh with his fingers. His strong grip would leave bruises on your skin tomorrow. 
With his huge cock nestled deep inside you, almost splitting you in half, he would let out a shaky breath. So good. So intoxicating. As you lie down, at his mercy, the sight of his cock slowly thrusting in and out of your tight hole, all stretched out around his thickness... it's too much to handle. As he plows into you from behind, he would moan. His member, all glistening and shining, covered in your wetness, the way your ass is swallowing him... 
He just can't.
His hands would be glued to your ass cheeks all the time. "You keep sucking me in, it won't let me go." 
He would try his best to stay nice. Stretching you out slowly. Even with slow strokes, his size is so overwhelming that it drives you crazy. Holding onto the bedsheets, closing your eyes, all you're allowed to do is imagine his jaw tightly clenched and his muscular body looming over you.
"Does it feel good, Y/N?" 
The instant you say yes and he feels you loose around his thickness, he will smash into you roughly, grunting loudly, slapping your ass, intoxicated by your you. And you alone.
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Corazon 
CW : Body worship, praises, face sitting, protected sex, wholesome, soft sex
To end on a sweet note, the lovely Rosinante.
Let's assume it's your first time ending up in the same bed. Rosinante is always kind to you, and you know he won't do anything to hurt you. But still, if you explain to him you're nervous because he's big and also because you're always a bit stressed when it comes to sex… then, Rosinante would just be even more sweet. 
"Sweetie, we'll take it slow. You trust me?" 
He would be both careful and nervous due to his goofiness. What if he just falls on you? What if he crushes you with his weight? What if... oh, no, he's thinking too much again, his hands twitching on your body.
"It's okay Rosi, I trust you." 
As you ease him down, he would kiss every nook and cranny of your body: neck, collarbone, breasts, stomach, belly button,... leaving red lipstick streaks all over.
His large, heavy, and yet kind hands would hungrily roam your figure, your shoulders, learning each of your curves, scars, and every single part that makes you, you. He would make you love everything you hate about yourself, making you feel safe and loved. 
His hands would be soft and heavenly as he fondled your breasts, mesmerized by how warm and soft they felt against his big palms. Well, he's still goofy, so he might accidentally pinch you or scratch your nipple, apologizing again and again with wet puppy eyes.
And slowly, his hands and mouth would continue to explore your skin, kissing your lower stomach, and slowly reaching for your damping wet panties. "So wet for me." 
He's genuinely amazed. Rosinante would be in awe: does he attract you so much? He just wants to smile warmly at you.
He would accidentally rip your panties apart, and then apologizes again. Please, just laugh or reassure him. After all, his goofiness is adorable.
He would be incredibly sweet if you're a bit nervous about exposing yourself fully to him. "Sweetie, I swear you're mesmerizing. So perfect and beautiful, I want to love every inch of your skin". While slowly running his hands along your inner thighs. "It's alright, sweetie. Just open your legs for me. Can you do this for me?"
If you're still nervous, then Rosinante would lie down and allow you to sit on his face with your wet pussy pressed against his lips. Rosinante would love to eat you out while rubbing his hands along your back, ass, and thighs. Soft kisses on your clit, hungry tongue drinking your juice while it flows down on his chin. 
He would gently massage your bottom while slowly sucking on your clit and swirling his tongue. Rosinante would just love to have your thighs squeezing his cheeks. Move, all you want against his tongue, all he wants is to satisfy you and soothe all of your worries. His focus will only be on you, regardless of how hard his cock is.
He would slowly slide a thick finger inside you, curling it nicely to hit that sweet spot, making sure you're ready and aware of what's happening. The way you moan his name and use his mouth as you please is mesmerizing. 
With two fingers gently stretching out, Rosinante would continue to worship your body with his hands and tongue. He's probably trying to hide his coughs because he's suffocating with his face stuck between your thighs. But who cares. The way you taste is like heaven.
If you want to cum, he would allow you to cum against his lips. If you want to stop before reaching ecstasy, that's okay too. 
"I'm ready for you, Rosi." 
Totally flushed and nervous, Rosi would let you ride him. He's too stressed by his goofiness, so it's better if you take the lead. And at least, you can control the rhythm and depth. 
Rosinante would definitely use a condom. But, he would struggle to open the packaging and then roll the protection over his length due to his nervousness, excitement, and goofiness. His big, shaking hands would likely cause him to split one or two condoms. Please, help this poor boy.
The shows continue with the lube. It's likely that he would let the bottle to fall, spilling all of the liquid onto both your belly and his hands. "I'm so sorry, sweetie!" And he would stupidly try to steal some lube from your stomach to smear it over his length. You can't help but laugh warmly, caressing his hair. "It's okay Rosi, relax."
His heart melts as you straddle him, his length twitching and leaking wildly. He's big, both in length and girth, and he's aware of it. He would allow you to take all of your time to prepare yourself. The way he looks at you tells how much he cares about you and how honored he feels to have you by his side.
"Whenever you want, Y/N" with his deep, soothing and soft voice.
As he feels your tight entrance against his cockhead, he would bite his lips, grabbing the bedsheets tightly. Because he would never dare hold you roughly and leave bruises on your body. When he sees that you're still a bit nervous, he would sit up while you're still straddling him. He would slowly raise your hips before easing his cock inside you. Pushing gently, each inch, slowly yet steadily. "Shh, it's okay, I've got you, you're taking me so well. You're so perfect for me." 
He would hold you tightly as you sit down on his lap, your breasts pressed against his chest. "It's okay sweetie, you're doing great, it's okay, almost there, just a little more, you feel so good around me." With his hands squeezing your hips to keep you still. 
His entire body would be shaking. The sensations are overwhelming for both of you. You're so tight, so wet, and his huge cock is stretching you so nicely, throbbing inside you. 
He would soothe your back gently as he finally penetrates you fully, his large size stretching you out even further. "There it's over. Look at you, taking all of my cock so well. You're such a brave girl. " 
He would slowly guide your hips up and down, unable to handle how good it feels. " I've got you, let me take care of you." 
A lot of kisses, soft, heavenly touches, his breath deep against your breath as he continues to slide gently yet firmly inside you. He would praise you all the time, worshiping your body. A bit goofy from time to time, loweering you to roughly down his cock, scratching you or biting your lips instead of kissing you softly. 
But a really, really sweet moment, and a lot of cuddles during the aftercare.
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FATUM NOS IUNGEBIT 3/4
König x F!Reader
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Summary: You have seen him in your dreams. The seer has divined his coming. But nothing has prepared you for witnessing him in the flesh. (Historical AU where König fights for the Roman Empire in an auxiliary unit, finds a cute barbarian woman and decides to keep her as his own.) Part 1 Part 2 Word count: 9.4 k Tags/warnings: 18+ ONLY. Spoils of war/enemies to lovers trope, graphic depictions of violence, historical gruesomeness, pining, odd banter, mixed feelings, romantic fluff, dubcon cuddling, eventual smut. Captor/captive dynamic. König is a brutal warrior... and a gentle giant. A/N: König takes liberties with his mouth. Dubcon is at its most dubcon in this chapter so please tread carefully <3 The actual smut happens in the next (and last) part. Long chapter because these two just can't behave!!
The days are getting warmer now. 
The sun warms the tent during the day, and the sound of birds searching for a mate threatens to drive you to madness. They sing during nighttime, too, and you miss the sturdy clay walls of your hut that blocked at least some of the sounds from outside. Now you are barely sheltered from wind and rain that beat the tent every now and then and can escape the swelling song of spring and lovesick birds to nowhere. König only snores with steady content as you mull over your strange fate there in his cozy bed, wondering how crazy it is that he never lets you go when he sleeps.
If König has an early council, you spend the morning eating breakfast in bed while studying odd parchments the translator gave you. The old man was quite insulted, not because you asked, but because you showed interest in the documents that, apparently, were of least importance to him. 
You don’t care that they’re “only” travel guides because they’re filled with Roman letters and numbers and usually illustrated with pictures of columns. You don’t understand a word they say and how those strange papers could ever be a travel guide to anyone, but you like to trace the letters and pictures with your finger. König clearly understood your fascination with them: he left you this morning with another smile, which told you he only thought you were simply adorable this way. He tried to tell you that the letters represent towns and the numbers tell the distances between those towns, but they still remain bizarre pieces of paper to you.
Men pass by occasionally; you can hear it from how their gears clonk and clatter and swish. You can hear the soft thump of sandals on the dirt, but you pay it no attention because you’ve always trusted that you are safe here. As long as you stay inside the tent, no one will touch you, even if they can currently see you because the flap is left open a wink. 
The only times his men witness you are when König takes you out for a walk in the woods so that you can take care of your bodily needs. Everyone can see that your hands are never tied, your face is never bruised, and your posture is still that of a proud, unbroken woman. And everyone looks at you with both hunger and wonder. Apparently, you are an even tempting spoil because you are not yet spoiled. 
The special treatment was rubbed in your face one time when you passed by a Roman soldier disciplining his slave, a woman who had shared your fate and clearly was having the worst of it. The other half of her face was unrecognizable, but the man kept beating her, and you stared in horror as whatever deed she had done to anger the man was now being punished far too cruelly. 
“Romans very dumb,” König said from next to you without even shedding a glance at the morbid scene. No one seemed to give a shit about what was happening to that poor woman, but you would never have expected such a comment to come from König’s mouth. When you asked him what he meant by that, he only shrugged and said: “That man piss on his luck.”
You wonder if the only reason why you haven’t been raped yet is because you are some sort of a lucky charm to him. The mere thought has the effect of making your blood boil, but some distant, tender voice inside you reminds you that König is not Roman. He does not share Roman customs, even if he fights with and for them. Perhaps slaves are treated differently in his land. Perhaps in there, it is considered an outrage and an insult to the gods to beat a woman, free or not.
Whatever his reasons are for not beating and raping you to death, it was a tremendous stroke of luck that König found you first. You dropped right there on his feet when he was victorious, so of course his men allowed him to take you as his: you were clearly a gift from the gods. But now that time has passed, you understand you are by no means safe if you wander outside this tent. König can protect you only when he is present or when you are safely tucked away in his own personal space. 
It’s a false feeling of safety, however, because you soon learn that out of sight is out of mind for these soldiers. Now that you are on display, sweetly and neatly on the bed, a tiny little wrinkle forming between your brows from studying the peculiar parchment, you are like fresh livestock on the marketplace, even inside the tent. You notice that someone else is in here with you only when you hear the sound of munching and turn. 
A relatively big soldier is standing in the doorway, eating an apple, watching you like he would rather have a bite out of you.
And you thank all the gods and stars above you, all the spirits and the Mother below you, that he doesn’t even get to take a step before a sword impales his chest.
König kills his own man so casually that all the thoughts of him falling to the gentle side of giants disappear instantly. He even twists the sword inside the broad man from daring to cast eyes on you. And you probably should feel bad for him… But you don’t. Not at all. The apple falls into the dirt and rolls away, but the man slumps into the threshold of the outside world and the safe womb of the tent, like an offering to guardian spirits - or to you.
You look up at König, eyes wide only because you are yet again speechless, but this time because of odd, bashful gratitude. 
“No touching,” he says without even blinking – it sounds like a stern explanation.
“No touching,” you agree with a whisper. König only nods, wipes his gladius clean on the dead soldier’s cloak, and carries the body into the woods.
You don’t know if he has lost some of the favour he enjoys among the Romans after killing one of their soldiers. You suspect he has not. Actually, you are sure his reputation only soared for it. He just showed everyone that his prize is not to be touched: you are not to be even looked upon. Romans probably respect such a thing.
A few wagons arrive one morning, carrying various supplies for the soldiers. There are many other items too, completely unrelated to warfare but all to do with pleasure and gambling and trade. You assume König gets to pick his favourites among the first soldiers, if not the first soldier, from the abundant cargo that arrived, because he brings his spoils to you with boyish excitement. There is close to nothing there for himself: only a thick, heavy cloak, made of dark wool with lush fur on the shoulders. It looks like something a northern king would wear, and you find yourself quite happy for him, but the other items he’s carrying are clearly all hand-picked just for you. 
There is a dress, a pair of sandals, a bone comb, some fruit and a large, round copper dish. It serves as a mirror as you change into the dress – a Roman one, dyed ocean blue – just to appease König and get him off your back. It hurts your heart to see how happy it makes him to see you accept his gifts. He holds the dim, uneven mirror in front of you when you get the dress on, and you’re feeling strangely meek: you’re not even sure if you have put it on properly. The bone comb is milk white and has two horses carved on it – it reminds you of the offering that was never made to appease the Great Mother because it couldn’t have prevented the Titan from coming to your lands. It’s another odd omen: black horses now turned to white, but an omen for what, you can’t say. 
And then… he kneels. 
König falls at your feet and starts putting the Roman sandals on, tying the strings around your calves so gently that it makes you feel like you’re made of clay. The sandals are not the kind he wears: they’re made for women, apparently, because they’re so skimpy and delicate. The strings reach the upper part of your calf, and when he’s done with you, happy to have now clothed you in Roman garb, he caresses your thigh and presses a kiss above your knee. 
And he looks up at you like you’re everything but his captive. He looks at you like you’re a queen. He stares at you like he’s the slave here.
“You like?”
The soft rumble catches you off guard, as does the fond caress he gives your leg. He doesn’t even try to move his hand upwards and under the dress; he just admires you from the ground, looking a bit foolish while crouched there at your feet. You swallow arduously and nod. What else are you supposed to do? 
He smiles with his eyes and gives you another kiss. He presses it on the sensitive part where your calf meets the inside of your knee. He even raises his hood to do it, and you finally feel his breath as his lips meet your skin, hot but tender. You fight the urge to shrink from him, and despite it only being a soft peck, a lover’s touch, the kiss leaves a burning sensation on your skin.
Then he tucks your dress down, like a slave who simply stole a little kiss from his mistress. You’re rendered weak and silent before such reverence, but then the playfulness returns as he raises one finger, as if telling you not to say a word because he just had an idea. You look at him with odd curiosity as he crawls on all fours and reaches for something underneath the bed. You panic a little, fearing he might notice that you’ve been there, too: rummaging through his things and throwing the pieces of jewellery back there without caring to ensure that they are placed back in the same position you found them in. But he doesn’t seem to care or notice.
He tries to offer you the golden pendant first, the one that has three discs on it. It’s a little too much, and you shake your head, fearing you will upset him by declining his gift. He tries to offer you a more delicate necklace next: full of cute, filigreed beads, but you shake your head again. He wishes to give you a trinket so badly that you finally raise your hand and graze your fingertips over a leather string holding a few chunks of amber. It also bears the claws of some animal: fox, perhaps. He looks very pleased with your choice and puts your new possession around your neck. You reach for the copper plate yourself this time and hold it up to see how you look in your odd Roman dress and your humble but powerful new necklace.
“Sehr schön,” König says behind you as you take in the wobbly image. He is so, so happy - you have never seen him quite so happy. It looks like he thought this to be the prettiest, most compelling piece of jewellery too; as if the gold and beads were simply currency for him, too. As if it was obvious that you would be interested in bones and sea gold instead of the gold of men. Then he pulls out something from under his tunic: another leather string that has a large hunk of bone hanging from it. He’s presenting it to you like he wants to show how you two are now very much alike.
“What is it…?” You ask, trying to determine whether the bone came from an elk or a deer.
“Bear cock,” he says proudly while dangling it in front of you like it’s the most natural thing in the world for a man to carry the penis bone of a bear around his neck. “Makes man strong in battle and bed.”
“I don’t think you need that,” you whisper while looking up at him. It’s your first joke to him, and he laughs. Heartily.
“Kleine Fee. You have only seen me fight.”
He puts it back under his tunic as if it’s his secret amulet now. You really don’t think he needs any more luck in war, or in any other… field. He seems like the kind of man who can pleasure women all day. It’s a bitter thought, somehow, and makes your heart feel heavy. You wonder how many women he has had already when you have refused to open your legs for him.
“We can try how good it works in bed,” he offers, as cheerfully as ever.
Oh. 
Oh… 
“I’m—I’m hungry. I think I need to eat something,” you summon an excuse out of thin air while raising your hands against his chest to keep him away. As if you could get your breakfast down after him saying things like that…
“Hungrig? I can feed you,” he suggests, still in the happiest of moods. Then he sweeps you off your feet and carries you to the table. He’s ever generous today: you get to sit on his lap as he starts to feed you grapes.
And you didn’t think he’d actually, veritably feed you. But that’s exactly what he does. You get an entire meal: ripe fruits, a thick handful of bread, a fine slice of fat, delicious cheese. Wine to wash it down, and then some more grapes. He holds them gently on your lips until you open your mouth a little so that he can push them onto your tongue. He watches with utter content how you eat everything he offers you. He even gives you a few bounces with his knee, and every now and then, he gropes your tits: just squeezes them and plays around with them while you eat.
It is quite evident that this man really, really likes your boobs. Perhaps that is why he carries the statue of Great Mother around… To your horror, you realize the piece of carved wood is not an idol of worship for this man, just a lewd image he probably digs up and looks at when he wants to stroke his cock.
Gods... This man is even worse than you thought.
You begin to pout again, and he draws you flush against him, seeing that he somehow managed to make you displeased. Unaware as to what could have caused this, he gives you another bounce and tries to find the reason for your sudden change of mood.
“Are you fed now?”
“Yes,” you mope even more as you realize you would very much like him to continue feeding you even if you’re full. To just… do that thing with the grapes again. Just a few more.
“Gut. We have to leave soon.”
“Why?”
He shrugs. “To fight.”
The camp is packed up in such haste that you find yourself under the sun in practically no time. You stay as close to König as possible without being glued to him, seeing that the new dress and hairstyle you made with the comb is high currency among the war-torn, lust-filled soldiers. Someone gives you a long whistle, which is followed by a few harsh comments you luckily don’t understand, but all the stares are cut off when König stops preparing his horse, rises to his full height, and wraps his fingers around the handle of his gladius.
You don’t get a single look after that, not even a sideways glance. Everyone acts like you don’t even exist.
The army moves at a slow pace at first, leaving a heavy dust cloud behind. It’s a fine day for travelling because there isn’t a single cloud in the sky. Everyone seems to be having a good time except for the slaves, and König is the only one who is vigilant, watching his surroundings at all times, head turning from side to side, hand never leaving his sword. 
You get a horse – his horse – and a lot of hateful stares from the other women, none of whom you have ever seen before. Captive girls from other villages, you presume, and they all hate you now because you get to ride a strong black stallion while they have to march in a dust cloud with their hands bound and their feet full of blisters. Their captors don’t give much thought to feeding or giving water to these poor women, mainly because they’re too busy laughing with each other and having hearty gulps from their wine sacks. You wonder if these men have ever fed these women a single grape during their campaign.
König, on the other hand, marches next to you like he’s your servant. He offers you his waterskin, his wineskin, too, and as the march goes on, an awkward knot starts to form inside your belly.
He’s behaving so oddly. You can’t find any other reason for his behaviour than that he simply has no full understanding of Roman customs because he comes from somewhere else. (Mountains, he said, when you asked him.)
You only now notice that he has servants but only uses them to pack or set up the tent. Other high-ranking officers and commanders have their servants with them at all times, tending to their every need. König is the only one who behaves like a foot soldier: he pours his own wine, gets his rations and supplies himself, lights his oil lamps without help and never lets anyone else touch his armour or swords. 
The servant he uses the most is the translator, a slave who’s clearly responsible for teaching König more and more of your words. He also serves as a mediator when König gets ready for another battle. You have naively wanted to forget the reason why these men are here in the first place, and as you see König putting on his full armour the next day, tying the swords on his waist and leaving to search for his shield, you feel like bursting into tears or a scream. You look away as he gets dressed, and refuse to give him a single kind look that morning. You stand with your hands crossed over your chest as he’s finally ready and fetches the old man to the tent again.
The Roman soon stands next to him as König takes a step and falls on one knee before you.
“He asks you to bless him,” the old translator says – weary and bored.
You stop breathing for a second and look at König, there at your feet again, head bowed, leaning on one elbow placed on a strong knee.
Bless him… For going to slaughter another clan? Give your blessing to him leaving people fatherless, childless and homeless? 
Is this some sort of a joke?
“Are my words… correct? Master asks that you give him your blessing for the upcoming battle.”
You bite your lip in frustration. You want to put your hand over this proud warrior’s head and send him away with words of might and fortune, but even the thought of wanting to do that is about to make you sick.
“I will do no such thing,” you say coldly and earn a sad, confused stare from König, who raises his head to look at you with a horrifying, pleading gaze. This man doesn’t beg for anything from anyone, and yet here he is, in his full armour, armed to the teeth and looking like the God of War again, asking for a kind word or two. You turn away, not because you deny him, but because you can’t stand to be under that defenceless gaze. The Roman sighs behind you, and from the clatter of König’s gear, you can hear that he has gotten up and is about to leave. 
You turn again, only to face his withdrawing back. Tense, and already beaten.
He grabs the satchel, the one that holds his Mother, but stops to look at it like it’s simply an ordinary object instead of a powerful entity. Then he places it back down on the table with a sigh. You look with horror as he leaves for war without taking his amulet, idol, fate, source of luck and joy – whatever the statue represents to this man – with him.
It doesn’t take long before you regret you didn’t give him your “blessing”. 
It somehow feels wrong that he left without it. You’re his captive, but he has fed you, clothed you, kept you warm. He has practically done no harm to you except hold you through the night and have a few gropes at your tits, which you haven’t found harmful at all… The least you could do to thank him is to lay a hand upon his head or sword before he left. Just a simple little gesture, not even a true blessing… Just a little something would have sufficed, to help him go into battle with a slightly lighter heart. 
Because as much as you loathe this man, you don’t actually want him dead. You don’t want him to march into battle and think you wish him ill. You don’t want König to get careless just for the sake of feeling miserable about the thought that his little slave girl despises him.
Because you don’t despise him.
You just don’t… like him. 
And he’s your captor still. Why should he deserve your blessing?
But the image of him cutting through his enemies with sorrow and bleakness in his stare, walking into a spear just because he’s had enough of life and more than enough of difficult, uncaring, ungrateful women, makes your heart bleed. He could’ve taken Mother with him since he didn’t get a good luck’s wish from you, but he chose to leave even Her behind. As if his faith had failed him, as if the few things and people he has ever placed his trust in have now abandoned him. 
The night rolls in, and the moon crosses the sky slowly, so slowly, as you wait for his return. The old Roman looks at you sideways every time you peek outside the flap and sigh. Your guard is a weak, old man, but you reckon that if you were to escape, the tired slave would simply follow you out of the camp and tell König which direction you have gone so that he can hunt you down when he returns. The few Romans left to guard the portable garrison would probably seize you and take you as their plaything before you managed to set a foot outside the vallus, and even if König came back to claim you, you could be a bloody heap by the time he returned.
And it’s not even caution keeping you inside the tent. You don’t actually think about fleeing at all. 
In the dead of night, you go to his satchel and pull out the statue of the Great Mother.
“Dear Mother... Great Mother. Please let him have his victory. Please let him come home unhurt. Even if he fails, please let there not be a scratch on him as he falls. Please, please, please…”
You improvise your prayer as you go, thinking about something to offer Her while being captive and not having access to most of the resources you would normally go to.
“I’ll give you my next moonblood. I will give you amber and fox claws…”
Your heart hurts, knowing you just promised the necklace König gave you as your sacrifice. But it’s a small gift for his safe return, and you renew your prayer, over and over again, while squeezing the Mother between your hands and pressing Her against your forehead.
You’re not sure if She can even hear you, because haven’t you wished this man dead not too long ago? You return the Mother to her satchel and pace around the tent, about to go mad. When the first horses arrive, you almost run outside to see if you can see or hear him coming. Soldiers march into the camp: there is so much din and racket outside that you know this is the least opportune moment to go outside and show yourself to the survivors who clearly have their morale and cocks up high from the recent battle. You wait and wait and wait, thinking about whether your god is among the wounded, being carried to some other tent where they treat injuries. You go and sit on the bed; you rise up and sit on the table. Then you go and press your ear to the fabric of the tent and try to listen like a fox. 
The flap is, blessedly, finally drawn aside, and you hurry to meet whoever has arrived. It’s König – of course – breathing heavy, looking slightly high-strung but primarily unscathed, and you forget yourself completely when running to him.
“Are you hurt!?”
He takes off his helmet and takes in a good breath of air, eyes melting into pure love when he sees you.
“Nein. Not a scratch.”
You swallow your relief – of course no one can get to this man. Your fears have been stupid and ridiculous. But in the deepest chasm of your heart, you thank the Mother three times. You promise to deliver her your sacrifice as soon as possible.
“You fear for me?” He asks, so excited again that you have to dig your nails into your palm so that you won’t go and clutch him and cry from joy. You don’t nod or shake your head; you only stare at him with what must look like a frightened deer stare.
Your giant comes to hug you so tight you can’t even breathe. Then he lifts you into the air, and there is nothing you can do - there is nothing you even want to do but to be there in his stout embrace. You’re so relieved that he is alive and unhurt that there are tears in your eyes, and he sees them, and smiles.
“Don’t worry, little Fee. Ich könnte dich niemals verlassen.” His voice is throaty and parched; apparently, he has shouted his throat raw on the field. 
You almost say you’re sorry that you didn’t give him your blessing, but seeing how pleased, triumphant, and gleeful he is causes you to shut your mouth and shut it tight. It’s enough that you have babbled prayers for him all night, praying your knees and tongue sore.
König returns you to the ground and leaves, only to return with ample loot. Two slaves carry in a small but heavy jute sack of coin, a tiny chest filled with honey, two bottles of scented oils, three gorgeous jugs of milk, a beautiful bronze sword, all laid there at your feet.
“Für dich,” he says, throwing a wide arc with his hand to gesture that all this is now yours. You watch all the stunning, lavish, extraordinary gifts, again picked with care just for you. You remember how there was not a single coin in this tent before you were dragged in, no bronze, no gold, no milk nor honey. No fine dresses, no stolen, scented oils. How many families did he have to kill to bring all these fine goods for you?
“I don’t want your loot,” you whisper on the brink of tears.
“What…do you want?” The smile in his eyes fades, and it stabs your heart full of pain. “More sea honey?”
“No, I–”
“Slaves?”
“No,” you step forward. If only you two could have met some other time, in some other place… “I just…I want my freedom.”
“What will you do with freedom…?” 
You finally get to see what König is like when he argues. He cannot understand your logic; he can’t understand what more he must do to satisfy you and make you happy. 
“Your chief is dead,” he says bluntly, causing your head to feel two times too small for your anger and pain. 
“You don’t have to remind me,” you blurt, equally bluntly. Because whose fault is that? This man is a thick-skulled, thick-cocked idiot.
“You have no husband. No village.”
“Yes, I know.”
“Why angry?”
“Because you are infuriating,” you almost shriek.
He looks at you, lost and confused, not knowing how to calm you down or make you pleased again. And it must be confusing: some gifts work, some don’t. Other times, you look at him lovely and sweet; other times you sulk and pout. You have luckily stopped your crying, but now you have suddenly decided to yell at him?
He approaches you after seemingly coming to the conclusion that you must want him to either pet or fuck you. He tries to raise his hands to touch you, but you push him away.
“Don’t you fucking dare grope me again!”
He withdraws quickly, now utterly nonplussed. If you don’t even want to be held, then what is he to do? This goes against all the laws of this world: he has arrived, triumphant and joyous from the battle, clearly favoured by all the gods, above and below, and favoured in full. The only one who doesn’t grant him a boon is you. His head tips to the side - it always does that when he’s curious or thinking hard. Then his eyes light up with understanding, and you know you’re about to hear more nonsense coming out of that oafish mouth.
“You don’t want me to fight?”
“I don’t…care what you do,” you scoff.
“Ah. You hate Romans?”
“Yes, I hate Romans. I wish they would all die. I hate their stupid battles and their stupid campaigns. And I hate you too,” your spirit rises with your words, your voice gaining volume and strength as you hurl all your frustration at him. 
And he’s shocked. Not at your first declaration, nor the second, not even the third. It’s the last sentence that clearly drives a dagger straight into his heart. 
He steps back, nearly toppling a milk jug as he pulls away from you. Then he mumbles something under his breath, something in his own crude language. The words are muffled by the mask as he scratches the back of his neck and leaves the tent without even taking his blood-stained armour off.
His name, the name that sounds so foreign to you, never leaves your mouth. But the following words do.
“Wait, I didn’t… I didn’t mean it.”
Not all of it.
He’s out of the tent by then, and you’re left with your beautiful gifts, your bitter sorrow and regret. You sigh and look up, hoping you could see the sky and whisper your inquiry into the night air. 
Why on earth did you two have to meet like this? Why does he have to be so thick-skulled and so… So him?
You calm your racing heart and start to organize the loot he brought you. You have never liked messy places and have done your best to keep this tent from getting cluttered. You taste some of the milk he brought you and inhale the sweet scent of those oils; you dip your little finger inside the honey jar and have a taste. The golden liquid tastes like the food of the gods when paired with milk. You put the blade on the table where König usually keeps his swords and settle to wait for him. 
And you have to wait for a long time, so long that you eventually withdraw to the bed, alone and with a heavy heart. When König finally returns, you can hear he has had a drink. More than one, too: he has probably drunk an entire jug of wine alone. He doffs his armour with curses and sighs, and lets it drop on the ground with a sloppy clang that makes you jolt under the furs. He eats something very noisily while throwing his helmet somewhere to the ground too, burps loudly, and sighs again: so deeply that it makes your heart burn. After getting rid of the tunic and his sandals – an operation that takes him more than a while – he crawls on the bed with a heavy breath. Your heart is at your throat as the stench of wine hits you, and his hands are clumsy and stern when he comes under the same fur and reaches for you.
“König—”
Your whisper ends abruptly as you are pulled against a familiar, broad chest. He growls at you for being awake – or at himself for waking you up with a drunken racket.
“I don’t… I didn’t…” you start weakly and have to clear your throat as he huffs against your neck, listening to what you are trying to say. 
“I don’t hate you,” you finally whisper.
He grumbles against your back and buries his masked face in your neck. The arm around your middle tightens and tightens, and you hurry to praise his gifts.
“The honey is delicious. And the oils are–”
"Fee… Du machst mich verrückt."
He speaks through gritted teeth while panting laboriously in your hair. You're relieved to hear sorrow instead of anger in his voice, but it’s his body that makes you arch your back and guide your bottom to meet his crotch.
The biggest mistake you’ve ever done, surely, because the whole body behind you grows taut. He gives you a tight roll of his hips, pushing his cock against you with immediate fervour. His balls meet your bottom, tight and heavy: you have gone to bed in your ridiculous Roman dress because you were feeling cold, but you can still feel them. You can feel all of him.
“König… We–We need to sleep…”
You sound like a bitch in heat, not at all like a woman who wants to stop wherever this heated cuddle is spiralling into. König is letting out noises you didn’t even know a man could make, and it makes your cunt wetter than ever before: tight and throbbing and embarrassingly needy. You try to remind yourself that this is not the proper time or way, that you don’t want it to happen like this: with the smell of wine and blood and dirt and sweat surrounding you, with him soon thrusting that cock between your thighs and shooting his seed on the bed before he can even get it in. You don’t want him when he’s drunk, and you don’t want him when he’s clearly a bit angry with you still. You place a weak hand over his, the one currently wrapped around your middle like a bond. 
“Please, I mean it…” 
“Not the time for sleep, little one,” he rasps on your shoulder, mask dragged aside and mouth breathing hot against your skin. His voice is gentle but his body is not: it turns out he has only been waiting for the slightest little cue to have the permission to take you. Unfortunately for you, moaning and grinding your hips against him is more than just a cue.
“Göttin der Erde... Gib dich mir.” 
He grunts odd, boorish words on your shoulder, leaving you breathless with another tight roll of his hips. It feels like a spell or a chant, the way he speaks. You want nothing more than to give yourself to him, and fear that whatever tie has been knotted between you two, whatever shackle has bound your souls together, has also granted him the ability to hear your thoughts. He must’ve heard them, or then he must smell the change in the air, because he rolls you on your back and pushes a knee between your legs.
“Meine Königin... Ich werde dich sehr glücklich machen,” he mutters more incantations in your neck, broad thigh forcing your legs further apart. He doesn’t even need strength to coax them open: they drag up and aside by themselves. 
“Ah–Why can’t you talk like normal people…” 
You sigh your silly thoughts out into the night air, and your fierce giant turns his head a little, now right there next to your cheek.
"Normal? Was ist das…?"
Your lips draw into a quivering little smile – you just can’t help it. Him lying half on top of you, asking what the word ‘normal’ means while smelling like an entire wine house just burned down makes your lips and heart flutter. Your soft laugh makes him raise his head a little, drunken, half-lidded eyes now fixed on you.
“The opposite of you?” You offer innocently and try not to laugh, but it’s no use. You start to snicker, then giggle, and the way he growls only makes things worse. 
“You little–I will go crazy because of you,” he whispers, drunk as a heartbroken man can be. Your own heart seems to open with a flood.
“Then go crazy,” you whisper back. 
And gods… He takes your sigh as a permit to go absolutely berserk. He crawls on top of you and rips your dress apart from the middle with both hands, exposing your breasts to him and the cold night air. There's a weight in his gaze that turns your nipples hard; a gaze of promise, just before he descends.
He attacks you like a starving man, devours and licks and sucks your breasts until you shake and moan on the bed, until your hands come to cradle his head with greed.
“I will make you scream tonight,” he pants roughly on your tits – you can feel the words on your skin. You’re veritably afraid that this man will swallow you before he even gets to the main event, which is no doubt to satiate the need to fill you with potent seed. He doesn’t exactly caress you, no: he gobbles you like your body is an entire feast, the generous kisses almost turning into bites when he reaches your hips.
“No–no teeth, König,” you try to whimper, somewhere on the borderline of tension and lust.
"Fee... I promise I'll fuck you like king. I'll fuck you until you cry.”
Your head goes blank from his words; from terror and love and lust. There's no time to decipher whether you should be afraid, because he scoops up your thighs, grabs you like a wrestling partner, and draws you against his face.
“Wait—What are you–”
Your words are cut off as he drives his nose up your cunt and breathes in your musk like it's divine incense. It doesn’t matter that you’re still covered by the skimpy dress he just ripped to shreds: the fabric is so thin that he could be virtually sniffing you through sheer gossamer. 
There’s no escape now; he can feel how wet you are. He can practically taste it.
“König—”
You can't understand why he would want to push his face there, so you mewl and try to push him away – very weakly – but he’s immovable, glued to your scent down there, panting into your warm, wet cunt with harsh breaths and starved groans. You're lying there at his mercy, dress torn to pieces and breasts heaving, thighs spread as far as they can go.
It's futile to even try reason with a starved giant between your legs, a cunt-deprived warrior about to finally take what's his. You should've known better than to joke around and play with a man who could snap you in half – either with his hands or with his cock – and Mother was wrong: you're not smart at all, teasing a beast like this. A beast whose teeth are currently bared over your most vulnerable place protected only by a thin veil soaked with your wet. 
König lashes his tongue out and presses it flat against your dress, on your throbbing womanhood, and your words turn into an ample, lewd moan.
“A–ah…”
You fall weakly back on the bed, head spinning although you haven’t drunk a drop of wine. The broad body almost trembles there between your legs. 
“Ah… You want cock, ja? I can taste it,” he grunts, blunt as ever. The thought of that thing being bullied into you inch by thick inch makes your cunt clench tight. Gods, you want it, but it will never fit, never…
Unless he… Unless that's why he's down there, panting hot inside you, trying to coax you open with his mouth. Perhaps he's not that dumb after all...
“Please,” you beg for him to love you, taste you, take you, your pride melting into copper and gold, pooling somewhere down, down, down… 
“Don't worry,” he speaks straight to your cunt like a man intoxicated with something far better than wine. “I will give you cock. All night.”
He lifts the dress with his nose like a dog, nuzzles under your ruined attire like it's his shelter for the night, headed back towards his plump prize. There will soon be nothing between his mouth and your poor, throbbing cunt, aching to be licked and loved by a cruel giant. A giant who brings you milk and honey and grapes and gold in all its forms… 
But just when you have finally forgotten that beasts possess teeth, he sinks them into you. He sinks them into your inner thigh, waking you up from the dream with sharp, harrowing pain.
The fucking idiot actually bites you, hard.
“You fucking—Go to hell!”
You push him away in earnest now, using his shoulders to propel yourself away from him. His teeth threaten to pierce and tear skin because he's so reluctant to let go, and the horrors of the battlefield seep into your skin; the safe warmth of the womb turns into a suffocating darkness. 
Your kicks have enough power to make him rise from between your legs, and the clear-cut pain in his eyes makes you want to both hug and hit him. You do the latter and hurl your fists at him, not bothering to even try to hit a target or cause pain; you just want him to stop making you afraid. 
Of course, he takes your breathless state and lust-filled rage as a cue to leave – and he does precisely that, but not before he has struggled away from you and your fists in an overly dramatic manner. It would look funny in another situation, especially when he's as hard as ever, cock jutting high towards the sky just from having a little taste of your love. Drunken and slightly wobbly, he almost falls when he grabs the tunic from the earthen floor as if his tent is a site of execution where he will soon be stoned. 
At the mouth of the tent, he stops, throws his head back, and roars. The guttural, booming rage echoes towards the gods like a furious curse, and you’re quite sure that the entire camp is awake by now. Every soldier nearby must be dying of a scared heart, thinking that there are either bears or Gauls upon them.
You hold your arms against your chest and safeguard your soft belly as you take in all his fury and frustration, then watch him stagger into the night, head hanging heavy between slumped shoulders. You’re left breathing, afraid and alone in the darkness, thinking about what the hell just happened… And spend the next moments in shock. Soon enough, the cold and terror fades, melting into something more palatable. You're shivering and wet, but intact, at least on the outside.
And the oddest thing is that you find yourself missing him. You miss his presence, his body, you miss his dumbness and his jokes. You fucking miss him.
The man who almost raped you.
With his… mouth.
You curl inside the furs and try to get some sleep with a hammering heart, ending up thinking about him all night. You thought he was going to pound you with that ridiculously long cock all night – and wasn't that his threat, too? – but what you didn't expect was that the giant barbarian who rips people's throats open with his teeth would want to lick and lap you into submission. You never would have thought that König wanted to bury his face between your legs, and eagerly at that.
Perhaps you understood his silly words wrong in your half aroused, half scared state. What if he meant to make you scream and cry from pleasure, not pain?
The burning bruise on your thigh reminds you that you are probably wrong, but you still wake every now and then from a thin sleep, glancing around you in despair, only to see that he’s not there. You feel so hollow that you think for a moment whether König has left the camp entirely, whether he is wandering away, towards some other adventure, exhausted with you and the war and the Romans.
The most unbearable thought in your head is not that he has left you for his dogs, however. It’s the thought that has abandoned you. That he has finally had enough. Because you realize… König hasn’t gone anywhere. He simply left to have his fun with some other woman. Perhaps he’ll be back in the morning, but his patience is gone; it has finally ended, your silly little game. A difficult slave girl who won’t even let him lick her cunt is simply no amusement to him anymore. 
Just before dawn, your will breaks; it splits in half. You can almost hear it. The sound of cries is muffled in the bed that nowadays has both his scent and yours: both of your scents combined, mixing together into a wonderful haze of love and despair.
König comes back when the dawn is already turning into a full day.
He strolls into the tent the same way he left: with a hunched posture and unsteady feet, but the fervent vigour from last night is gone. Actually, you have never seen him so weak. The dramatic sighs, the groping and the bullying have turned into a piercing silence. His muscles have lost their strength, his head is hanging heavy between those once proud shoulders, and his eyes are cast down as if he’s hoping there wouldn’t be such a bright orb in the sky. He drags his feet as he enters the tent; he doesn’t even look your way when he goes and slumps in his chair.
You are so glad to see him that you nearly jump from the bed and fall right there at his feet. You want to kiss his thighs and grab his hands and look up at him, doting and adoring like a good little slave. You want to whimper and beg that he can give you love bites everywhere he wants.
Instead, you snap at him, voice filled with poison.
“Did you have fun raping women last night?”
There are leaves on his mask and dirt on his shins and knees. Even his hands are a little grungy, and the proud red Roman tunic could also use a wash. He sheds you a tired side stare, then sighs.
“Was?”
“Were you with women,” you spell out every word slowly like you’re talking to a child. The venom on your tongue threatens to spill out as froth. And you almost say, 'other women'. Almost.
König raises his head and looks at you with a slight tilt in his head. He’s curious again, so, so very curious. He has clearly fleed the sun into his tent rather than seek your gracious presence, which shouldn’t make you this glum... But what you just said has managed to brighten up his entire day.
“Meine Fee… She’s jealous,” he points out in a far more jovial tone.
“No. Not at all,” you hurry to say, chin drawing back from his stupid accusations. 
“You are,” he says with unbridled fascination. 
“I assure you I’m not.”
Your cheeks are heating up, and the nervousness inside your belly roils like a snake. How does he always manage to get you into a trap? 
König leans back in his chair, now with his usual dignity on those shoulders. He even crosses his fingers loosely in his lap, looking like the conversation he’s about to have with you will, yet again, become another favourite of his. You’re not sure why you always feel like you’re being interrogated on the sly with him because König is the most simple, straightforward, blunt object of a man you have ever met. And still…
“Fucking other women is bad?” He asks innocently from that chair.
“Bad?” You huff. “Yes, if you have to force women under you, you are a brute.”
“And… ugly?”
“Very ugly. The ugliest man in the world.”
"Hm. But who say anything about forcing?"
König looks at you, calmly, as your stomach sinks from his words.
You can only stare at him as the world seems to fall apart around you, crumble into nothingness when there's sun shining and birds singing outside. Kicking him out of the tent – and almost kicking him in the face in the process – because you got afraid when he gave you a fervent little nib seems like the stupidest idea right now. If you were so willing to part your legs for him and moan under his tongue, surely some other insane woman would want to do that as well? Surely there is at least one woman in this camp who would gladly be pleased by this giant who doesn't hit or force women. Who only likes to… bite and squeeze and lick them.
You pout at him, lip almost trembling now, and he’s smiling, so, so very wide behind that mask. Gods damn him. 
Then he rises and walks to you, suddenly looking like he isn’t suffering from a hangover after all. He strolls towards you with slow purpose, and you swallow the tears down, trying not to show him how they turn into ice inside your stomach. 
“I have not touched women. Only you.”
He towers above you, looking down at you like you are indeed the most adorable thing in the entire world. You are not sure whether his words are to be believed, but something inside you says that this man never lies. As dense and dumb as he is, he is the most trustworthy human being you will ever meet.
“Only sleep with earth last night,” he says and starts to caress your hair. He even weighs some of it in his hand before sweeping it over your shoulder. Like you are simply his precious, silly little wife who has been spoiled too much.
“It was a cold mistress,” he laments, overly dramatic again, like a poor actor in a tragic play. Your heart aches, badly – you swear König is the most annoying man you have ever met, the most insufferable and lovable. You wonder if he has spent his seed on the cold, hard ground too. Given it to the Great Mother, who is a cold lover sometimes indeed… But not as cold as you.
You wonder how crazy it is that you have the power to drive this giant into the cold night from his own tent. König has had to face his hangover by waking up to a chilly dawn. His hand is not as warm as usual, and you start to worry that he has caught the wrath of wind spirits outside, soon rendering him weak and feverish. His skin is not supposed to feel this cold, not when he’s almost always blazing.
“I know a plant that might help,” you say diplomatically. “With your… Head.”
He looks at you, more and more curious by every passing moment. You hope he doesn’t weigh in his mind whether you are trying to poison him when he is weak. But he’s not that clever, perhaps, because he only looks at you like you’re an entire sun now, and very unlike the one that is giving him a headache today. You turn away from his hand – but not too quickly. You’re only feeling shy. And a bit uncomfortable.
“You should eat something. And drink water, not wine.”
“You care about my head?”
Gods… His voice is so, so soft. He’s seeing past all your defences again, and there is nothing you can do about it. You want to curse him but can’t. You simply can’t. 
“Just… Eat some fruit, alright? And I need a kettle so that I can boil some water for the herbs.”
You rise from the bed and try to ignore his adoring stare. He doesn’t attempt to touch you again; he merely watches as you go about and eat a little something as if to show that when it is morning, people should have breakfast. Like you’re a mother trying to lead by example or a fussing young wife who is trying to help his husband. Your lips are a thin line as you search for grapes that aren’t too soft and a piece of bread that doesn’t yet have mould in it. You grab some figs: you know they are his favorite, and bring them to him to tell him you’re serious about him needing to eat.
And you feel silly. 
You can’t even look at him. You’re feeling so odd, so weak, so warm inside, and it’s not because you’re disgusted; hell, it’s the opposite of being disgusted….
“I have fallen in love with you,” König says as he accepts your humble offering of food. You freeze in the middle of setting them on his palms, held upwards as if content with whatever you give him, even if it’s only a piece of bread and a few figs. 
Gods. Mother… Don’t do this to me–
“That how you say it?”
You breathe in and out, calm, collected – you're not going to faint because some crazy giant thinks he's in love. Yes, that’s it… Everything’s alright. He’s just being silly again. He’s just playing his own little plays again. 
But when you look at him, there is no actor there, no silly play: he’s just… König. He returns your helpless, cornered stare with warm kindness, reminding you of something, of some Roman or Greek god… Apollo. Yes, that’s it. Laureled sun god Apollo, the one everyone loves so dearly, because he always drives fear and doubt and darkness away. He’s Apollo, even though he doesn’t even prefer a bow. 
And has the translator taught König the correct words? Has he memorized them so that he can say them to you when the time is right? Your lip starts to tremble, and you fight to not shudder a sigh. The old seer was wrong: this man will be your downfall.
“I’ll go get that plant,” you whisper, soft eyes wide and chest curled tight. 
“Nein,” he says cheerfully, full of life and hope again. “Not alone, little one.”
A/N: Please don't send me death threats. Remember, big bang bang next chapter! Huge!!
Translations:
Sehr schön - Very beautiful
Kleine Fee - Little fairy
Hungrig? - Hungry?
Ich könnte dich niemals verlassen - I could never leave you
Für dich - For you
Du machst mich verrückt - You drive me crazy
Göttin der Erde… Gib dich mir - Goddess of the Earth… Give yourself to me
Meine Königin... Ich werde dich sehr glücklich machen - My Queen... I will make you very happy
Was ist das? - What is that?
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ew-selfish-art · 1 year
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Dp x Dc AU: Not exactly a meet cute between Jazz and Jason.
Jason's had a long night of beating the shit out of a gang that dared to sell in his territory, the last thing he needs is the Bats on his tail. He can always sense them when he leaves Crime Alley- they watch for him. Waiting for him to fail. It pisses him off.
So Jason shakes his tail, he's pretty sure it's the demon brat, parks his bike, removes his helm and heads into the loudest bar he can find, ditching his mask along the way. There are no camera's and there was no one watching, so Jason just looks like any other angry frat guy at the bar. Well, he supposes that the Leather jacket might be a stand out.
He grabs a drink, and looks at the time. Jason just needs to wait out the chance that a baby bird saw his bike and hope that curfew kicks in before this has to be a 'conversation'. Besides, the music is good and despite all the people, the crowd is pretty behaved.
"Hi! I'm so glad you're here!" A woman approaches, he can tell she's had a few drinks from her walk but her eyes scream sobriety and fear. She's tall in her flats, her hair looks disheveled (from dancing maybe) and her outfit screams 'this is the one fun black top I own'. She's beautiful and her approaching him might've been a wet teenage dream if his suspicions weren't immediately raised.
"I certainly am here." Jason replies, a smirk set into his features easily and as he straightens out his back he can see the three men watching the back of her head like predators. They're wearing super lame white hoodies and coats, like they're organized somehow.
"That's why you're my hero! Always ready to grab me at a moment's notice! Any chance you'll be good to leave after you finish that drink?" Her eyes are pleading but she keeps the same happy smile and joyful tone the whole time.
"Nah, no worries about the drink. It was cheap and I was just getting bored with it anyway. " Jason explains, setting his glass down on the counter. He's mentally photographed the three creeps, "Did any of your friends also need a ride home?"
"Nope! They all got in an uber... without me. So they'll be just fine!" She explains and there is an anger in her eyes that clearly meant she was telling the truth. Her hands are straightening out his jacket collar, making it look like they're more comfortable with each other than just strangers. She lays her hands flat on his chest once her task is completed and Jason feels his throat go dry.
"I'm always telling you to find better friends. Now c'mon, I parked out back." he wraps an arm around her waist, though its not tight, and peers over his shoulder. These guys weren't going to leave without a fight it seems, Dumb, Dumbie and Dumber are all watching her with evil in their eyes.
The two of them walk out and before she can even say thank you, the door swings back open and she's sucker punched one of the assholes and Jason's pulled his gun out for the other two.
"You gents are gunna go home, or you're gonna end up in the dirt. Pick." Jason growls. Not taking him seriously at first, he shoots one dudes foot and the last one standing looks like he might pass out. He picks up his fallen comrades and backs away into the bar.
"For ancients sake those dudes were trying to traffic the hell out of me." She sighs, and Jason holsters his gun.
"Yeah no shit. You okay?" Jason inquires.
"I will be. I'm Jazz, thanks for saving me Hood."
"I'm no-"
"You're literally leaning comfortably on Red Hoods motorcycle that still has his helmet perched on it. No one would do that unless they were suicidal or him." She challenges, but then a look changes in her eyes and she almost looks nervous "But still, do you uhm, wanna get out of here?"
He blinks. She was trying to pick him up? AFTER finding out he was a crime lord??
The answer is that yes, Hell Yes, Jason does want to get out of here. None of the Bats will bother him while he has a civilian, not at the diner he takes her too and certainly not while he's taking her back to one of his safe houses.
Jason had expected one of his siblings to show up in the morning and cause a ruckus. He hadn't planned for a dude to let himself into his kitchen screaming about government agencies tracking Jazz down that wasn't related. Turns out it's her brother and he's floating and no he's not going to explain why he's there or how he found them.
Jazz has a lot to explain to the both of them and it starts with "So I can admit that I have a thing for motorcycle guys-"
2K notes · View notes
megalony · 14 days
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Keep You From Harm
Okay, so this is a new Evan Buckley imagine based on a random idea I had. I hope you will all like it, I had so much fun with this one.
Please let me know what you think, I'm so excited about this one.
Taglist: @justagirlthatlovedtoread @musicistheway @avada-kedavra-bitch-187 @luula @missdreamofendless @bradleybeachbabe @woderfulkawaii @amberpanda99 @daggersquadphantom @marvel-and-chicago-fan @angryknightstatesmantrash @minjix @lyje @kmc1989 @itsmytimetoodream @noonenuts @hiireadstuff @ashie-babie @classyunknownlover @jayyeahthatsme @sp1ritssz @dumb-fawkin-bitch @oliverstarksbae @gimatida @heart-35 @supernaturalstilinski @kyky9103 @wutheringhearts2275 @gay4hotmilfs @itshamleth @chaoticnosleepinfluencer @gs29 @wh0reforsmutstuff @mel-vaz @natashamea18 @chrisevansdaughter @alexandra848484 @deena-beena-weena @targaryenluvs @kpoplover-19 @marvelmenarebeautiful @gillybear17
@zoeybennett @mrspeacem1nusone @zephyrmonkey @estella-novella @eleventhdoctorsangel @kniselle @senjoritanana @shauna-carsley @dottierose @cfdhouse51 @darkfemme1 @rainechase45 @lolalolsstuff @jupiter1700 @ashdoctor @an-aliens-ghost @lunaroserites @houseoftwistedspirits @callsignwidow @winterreader-nowwriter @reneinii @bellsbomb @western-pyro @itsgigikay
Evan Buckley Masterlist
Summary: When a situation rises at the station, Evan takes control and finds himself forming a bond with someone he promises to protect. And he'll do all he can to help her.
Enjoy.
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The feeling of her bare feet against the path should have sparked pain through her body, but she couldn't feel anything anymore.
The soles of her feet weren't burning in agony even though the skin was rubbing raw with the beginning of blisters wearing away at the worn skin. Her cracked heels were coated with dirt, flecks of gravel and broken skin, but she couldn't feel any of it.
Her feet barely touched the floor like a bird scraping through the sky and the faster she ran, the more lightweight she began to feel.
Running always used to make her sluggish, tired, heavy. Not anymore. Not today. Running made her feel open. The more steps she took, the faster she moved, the more she felt like she was about to take flight and start running on air.
She couldn't breathe properly anymore, too much running, too much energy burning and cells breaking down to supply the air she wasn't breathing in. But it didn't slow her down. If anything, (Y/n) seemed to run faster and she knew the moment she stopped, she was going to collapse.
The burning that had previously lit up her sternum and spread throughout her diaphragm had disappeared when the adrenaline started to take over.
Her hands balled up into fists at her sides and her arms cut through the air, propelling her to run faster in any direction she could.
People stopped to stare, of course they did, but no one reached out for her. She was running too fast for anyone to think about stopping her, let alone try and reach out and find out why she was in such a hurry. Or find out what she was running from. She was within their sights and then she was gone, pelting round the corner, skidding on the pavement, lurching forward and regaining her balance before she fell.
She couldn't stop, not for anything. If something slowed her down, that would be it.
She had to get somewhere safe. A public restroom, they had locks on the doors and a room like that where there were no corners for people to hide behind and only one way in or out would be safe. She could hide there. She could be safe there.
But (Y/n) couldn't see a restaurant or a cafe or any shop nearby that looked like they might have a public restroom she could use, and public toilets near parks weren't safe, everyone knew that.
Tears glossed over her eyes and whipped across her face in the breeze as she rounded another corner. Her left hand reached out for the building at her side, using it as leverage to prop herself up so she didn't fall to the floor and stop her momentum. The bricks scraped against her palm, taking the first layer of skin off and creating streaks across her palm, but she couldn't find the will to care.
There were no shops on this street. No place she could go, no houses- she couldn't go to a house. Not if she didn't know who lived inside. She could be welcomed in and never let out again.
Red.
That one colour stood out on the street like a beacon, it was all she could see. Red shutters. Dark bricks and grey windows and large open bay doors big enough to let a tank in or out.
A fire tower at the back of the building. A shield sign placed dead centre above the doors.
It was a fire station.
That was one of the safest places she could be, aside from a police station.
It felt like a beacon, guiding (Y/n) in like constellations in the dark night sky telling her where she was in the world and which way she needed to go. Her feet pounded against the pavement creating loud echoes in her wake and her chapped lips parted, letting out horrid gasping breaths as she tried to keep her momentum going just a little further.
She could feel herself slowing down once those shutters were within her sights and she allowed herself to propel round the corner, taking a sharp left into the building. She didn't know where she was going, what she was doing or what she was going to do once she stopped running.
All she knew was that in here, she would be safe. She had to be.
Once the siren finished its loud screech and the dispatch call finished over the radio, Evan allowed himself to down the scolding hot coffee in his signature mug. He poured the last drops down his throat, hoping this would fuel him enough and make him last until tea time. He'd had one round of toast for breakfast and no dinner, suffice to say he was barely going to last on his fifth cup of coffee today, but it would have to do.
He had gotten used to the red lights constantly whirring from the roof of the station, telling the A team to get ready and load up, they had a call.
He dunked his cup in the sink and heaved his wary body towards the stairs. He had no desire to slide down the pole and have an accident, and he wasn't rushing. The truck would wait for him to get there, they didn't have much of a choice in the matter.
Evan dragged his hand through his curls, brushing them out of his face as he stomped down the stairs, each step landing with a thud and causing shockwaves to rattle up through his body. He was on his last reserves already, he wasn't likely to make it through the next call.
He looked around the station once he reached the ground floor. The rest of the team were already in motion. Bobby was about to climb into the driver's seat of the truck. Chimney was getting into the back and Eddie was grabbing his helmet and jacket from his locker. When the ambulance roared to life, Evan figured Hen was driving. It had to be a big call if they were taking the ambulance too.
He was glad he wasn't driving the ambulance, it annoyed him. The clutch was loose and the brakes were too sharp, he was used to the pedals in the truck.
Dithering to the right, Evan found his helmet and jacket and slung the jacket over his shoulder.
"Buck, let's go."
"I'm coming," He hollered over his shoulder, tucking his helmet beneath his arm, pinning it against his hip. But when he spun on his heels, he wasn't sure why, but his gaze darted down to the floor.
His head tilted slowly to one side like his neck had broken and his brows furrowed as his lips parted.
"What the…" His voice was no louder than a whisper on the wind as he spoke to himself, unsure if he was seeing this right.
Those blue eyes narrowed intently until it felt like he had tunnel vision and the end of his rounded nose scrunched up. But when Evan bent his knees and stooped over, a chill ran down his spine and sent his blood curdling like milk in his veins.
His lips parted, jaw dropping down as words and phrases clogged the back of his throat, but he didn't manage to get one word out before the rumbling of the ambulance engine made him jump back up straight. The helmet beneath his arm clattered to the floor and the jacket on his shoulder slid casually down his back until it pooled behind his heels.
Evan sprung into action, his thick boots clobbering against the floor as he pelted towards the driver's side of the ambulance just as Hen pushed it into gear and the wheels made one full turn.
A high-pitch alarm cut through the air when Evan jumped up onto the side step and yanked the driver's door open. He was lucky Hen was still in first gear and barely moved an inch or else the door would have locked automatically and he wouldn't be able to do this. He swung the door back, leaning out the way before he reached in to be level with Hen who slammed on the brakes and pushed back in her seat. The alarm in her eyes looked as if she thought Evan was about to try and kiss her or pull her from the ambulance.
"Buck! What-"
"Code red. Brake on and get out slowly." The affirmation in Evan's voice was unnerving and Hen couldn't find the will to move.
She stayed put while Evan leaned across her, yanked on the hand-brake and turned off the ignition. He flung the keys across to the passenger seat, just in case Hen thought about trying to turn it on and drive off. He couldn't have her doing that. They had a situation and he needed this ambulance to stay stationary, right where it was.
Hen didn't know what that meant. Code red could mean anything. It could be someone in the station was injured. It could imply someone was trying to hold a hostage situation. It could mean a bomb. There were multiple implications and the only thing a code red actually meant right now was that something bad was either happening or about to happen.
But Hen did as she was asked. She took off her belt and carefully climbed out of the truck when Evan stepped down.
"Guys, what're you doing?" Eddie leaned his head out the window of the truck and whipped the headset off his ears. They had a call, they had to go. Why had Hen and Evan stopped the ambulance? Why were they walking away like they were going to go on a break and leave the rest of them to it?
Hen dithered in between the ambulance and the truck that was halfway out the station where Bobby had sharply braked when he realised the rest of the team weren't coming along. She waved her hand towards the truck, implying for them to come over to her and Evan who was already walking away from her.
Evan kept his steps light and he held his breath when he walked round to the back of the ambulance where he had been less than a minute ago. When he looked over at Hen, he held his hand out to silently ask her to stop where she was. If this was what he thought it was, he didn't want a scene unfolding.
Hen's jaw dropped and she looked behind her for the team who were running over when they all watched Evan crouch down and suddenly lay on his stomach.
He laid flat out on the recently mopped floor, stretched out like a crocodile about to crawl back into the swamp. His chin lifted from the floor and his palms pressed down so he could shuffle closer and lean his head beneath the ambulance.
He wasn't quite sure what to do when a pair of rabid, petrified eyes locked with his.
He knew it.
Evan knew he had seen someone under the ambulance. He had to get Hen to stop, he had no idea who was hiding beneath their ambulance and if Hen swerved to one side, she could potentially run the person over.
"Hi there," His tone was gentle and his words were so quiet Evan could barely hear himself, but he didn't dare speak any louder. He didn't want to frighten or overwhelm her.
She huddled up tighter like a rabbit curling into a ball and when she inched back another foot, she was under the centre of the ambulance. Making herself less of a target and very hard to reach, especially for Evan with his large stature and big build.
He gulped down another breath and tried his best to put on a calm expression. A lot of the nurses at the hospital always told him he had a calming look about him and a comforting manner, he hoped that was the truth right now so he could help whoever was hidden under here.
His eyes took her in, from what he could see with the shadows cast beneath the ambulance. Her arms were huddled up to her chest with her hands pinned beneath her chin like she was keeping them safe. Her legs seemed to be curled up towards her torso and her head was aimed down, but Evan could see her eyes were fixated upon him, too afraid to look away.
She had blood on her. Evan could see streaks of blood beginning to dribble down her face, she had to have some sort of cut on her scalp in her hair. Her lips were chapped and bloodied too like she had bitten them to shreds. The whole of her frame was lightly trembling back and forth and he could hear her trying to take deep breaths which came out as wheezes.
"I think you know this is a fire station… and you know we protect people, is that why you're hiding here?"
He waited for any sign that she understood him and Evan was struck with a sudden thought that maybe she didn't speak English. But when she nodded, he breathed in relief and smiled.
"I'm a fireman, see?" He lifted his chest a little and pointed to the logo on his shirt. "If you need protection, we can look after you, and I think you need a medic. Hiding under here might not be the best place to be though, sweetheart, we were about to roll out and you could get hurt under here. Can you come over to me?"
The rapid shake of her head made Evan deflate a little. She couldn't stay under here for long no matter how safe it made her feel. He would have to show her that he would help her and protect her if that's what she needed.
"Can I come to you then?"
When she didn't say anything or shake her head, Evan glanced up at Hen who was crouched down to try and see what the situation was. He mumbled "Stay there," to her and the rest of the team who were waiting to see who was under their ambulance. He didn't want them overwhelming the girl or frightening her.
With a deep breath, Evan pressed his forearms down into the floor and army crawled beneath the truck until only his ankles were visible to the rest of the team. He stopped a few inches from the girl, staying close enough that he could reach out for her but so he wasn't touching her.
"My name's Evan, but everyone here calls me Buck. What's your name, sweetheart?" He folded his arms in front of him and rested his chin on top of his forearm.
He waited patiently and noticed that the longer she stared at him, the more she let herself relax. She stopped hunkering up into a ball and let her legs spread out behind her. She moved her arms so her hands were planted down on the floor instead of cocooned to her chest, and the trembling ceased a little.
"(Y/n)."
"Are you hurt?"
When (Y/n) tilted her head down, Evan leaned a little bit closer so he could try and see in the dim light casting beneath the ambulance. She had a cut in her hairline rather close to her temple, it didn't look deep but head injuries always bled a lot.
Her hand gingerly slithered to touch the right side of her chest and she winced, causing Evan to bite down on his lower lip.
But what caught Evan's attention the most was her hands. He couldn't stop looking at them. Her nails were split and cracked. She had jagged edges to her nails and her fingertips were rubbed raw, like she had been scratching and clawing at something. And there were marks on her wrists too. Evan knew those kind of marks, he had seen them before. She had been bound by something, possibly rope.
She was a victim of some kind of abuse.
"Did someone hurt you, is that why you came here, to get away?"
The words must have been too painful to voice, for (Y/n) only nodded as a shiver passed over her frame. She had come here for sanctuary, to be safe and helped and Evan would make sure that happened.
"Okay sweetheart, I think I need to take a look at those injuries, but I'm a bit too big to be under here. Can you come out into the station with me, please? I promise I will keep you safe, no one will come near you if you don't want them to… I won't let anyone else hurt you."
When his eyes darted down to the marks on her wrists, he watched (Y/n) glance at them before her eyes were overwhelmed with tears.
Her head started to nod and Evan's lips softened into a tender smile before he took a look around, making sure he was clear to start crawling back out. He pressed his left hand down on the floor but he reached his right hand out towards (Y/n). He would prove she was safe, he would take her hand and guide her out from under here. He would stay with her and make sure that if anyone came near her when she didn't want them to, they wouldn't get near her.
No one else was going to hurt her, Evan would make sure of that.
Evan was a little surprised when she took his hand, but he was relieved too. He felt her fingers squeeze his hand so tightly the tips of his fingers turned white and he started to lose feeling in them, but he didn't care. He tried to run his thumb over the back of her hand while he started to shuffle backwards.
His eyes remained on (Y/n) as she slowly inched forwards, using her elbow and her knees to shuffle after Evan.
She wasn't sure why she chose to hide under here. She could have curled up in a corner and waited for someone to spot her. She could have screamed or cried or just flopped down on her knees in the middle of the station. Someone would have walked past and seen her, someone would have come over to help her and find out what was wrong.
But when she got into the station, all she wanted to do was hide. What if they had been running after her all this time? What if they had seen her run in here and tried to grab her? What if the people here weren't safe either?
She scuttled onto her knees and crawled under the ambulance with the last bit of energy she had. She curled up, smothered her ragged breaths and waited for the dizziness to pass, but then she couldn't find the will to move. Staying curled up under here felt safer than trying to move and ask anyone for help.
With her fingers tangled tightly with the fireman in front of her, (Y/n) tried to follow his lead and shimmy out from beneath the truck. It felt like they were doing some kind of army course, crawling beneath barbed wire through mud and water to get out on the other side.
She could feel the shaking setting back in her system once she was laid on her stomach, out of the cover from the ambulance.
The light burned her eyes and made her squint, causing her to feel like she had become blind and her head faced down to stop the pain. Both hands latched around the fireman's arm and she clung to him, not willing to move from her knees. She didn't want to move. She wanted to go back and hide. People were looking. She could hear voices. People were getting closer.
"Will you sit in the back of the ambulance with me sweetheart? Then I can see if you're okay, hm?" Evan continued to brush his thumb over the back of her hand and he moved his other hand to hold her arm.
He stayed kneeling in front of her so she didn't have to look around and try to focus on the team hovering by. All of whom were astonished someone had crawled beneath their ambulance and no one had noticed.
They could have run her over.
When (Y/n) nodded her head, Evan slid both hands to her elbows and slowly reeled her up along with him. He nodded when Eddie shifted to open the ambulance doors and Evan slowly walked (Y/n) back until she was sat down on the back step. He had a feeling climbing inside the ambulance might frighten her, it might make her feel penned in and unsafe, but sitting here was okay. She wasn't trapped if she sat here.
"Call dispatch over the radio, get them to send a different team to their callout please." Bobby patted Hen's shoulder and nodded for her to head to the truck. It didn't look like any of them were going anywhere, they had a more pressing matter to deal with here. He knew Hen would reverse the truck back in the station too.
"You two can go take a lunch break." Bobby could see the girl was overwhelmed, having the whole station crowding round wasn't going to help. She looked like she was only going to accept Evan's help at the moment.
Once Eddie and Chimney disappeared, Bobby weaved around Evan and climbed into the back of the truck so he could find some supplies for them. He handed down some cotton, gauze and antiseptic when he noticed Evan inspecting her hands that were grazed.
"You said someone hurt you, did you know them?" Evan spoke quietly as he started to dab the cotton along her palm and clean the speckles of blood.
He watched as she shook her head and he took in the sight of her in the midday light. Her hair was a mess, falling out of a bobble, a few knots in places. Her skin looked dry and grazed and she had a little bit of engine oil on her cheek, which he guessed was from the ambulance.
But seeing her right now, in the daylight, Evan pondered on what she was wearing. A thin vest and an oversized zip up jacket that was hanging off one shoulder and looked like it had seen better days. The jogging bottoms she wore weren't much different. They were dark leaf green with a few holes in places, but they weren't her size. The material was bunched around her ankles and the draw strings- which were frayed and grey instead of white- were done into a double knot to stop them from falling down.
Evan dragged his eyes down her frame, but his stomach pulled in and he could scarcely breathe when he looked down at her feet.
His touch was slow and gentle when he cupped the back of her ankle and gently lifted her foot so he could see the soles of her feet. She wasn't wearing shoes, he hadn't noticed earlier. But now he had, and it looked like she had been running for a long time, she had blisters on her feet.
No shoes. These weren't her clothes. Her nails were split and her hands were cut up and scratched. She was bleeding and if he had to guess what was wrong with her chest, he would say she had broken ribs from the way she held herself.
"Did someone… did someone hold you captive?" The words took Bobby by surprise who hadn't paid as much attention to their victim as Evan seemed to have done.
Those words must have triggered something because the girl coiled her arms to her chest and began to nod her head furiously. She curled up into the side of the ambulance, brought her knees up to her stomach and began to cry.
"I'll call Athena." The grave expression on Bobby's face made Evan wince, they both knew what this meant. And when Bobby whispered "Procedure," in Evan's ear, he nodded.
They had to take (Y/n) to the hospital, whether she would want them to or not. She would have to be assessed and examined and the police would have to come down to the hospital. She would be kept for twenty-four hour observation, even longer if any injuries called for it. The team would have to give statements.
When Bobby climbed down from the ambulance and disappeared towards his office, Evan made himself busy trying to clean up the cut on (Y/n)'s temple.
She stayed surprisingly still and willing as he cleaned the cut and carefully dabbed cotton across the streaks of blood on her face. She didn't even flinch when he pressed a finger beneath her chin to tilt her head up in his direction.
Once he was done, Evan carefully sat down on the step next to her, keeping an air of space between them just to make sure she felt safe. He clasped his hands together between his thighs and hunched his shoulders forward while he tilted his head to the left to look over at her. The shaking seemed to have stopped again but she was still huddled near the door.
"We have to take you to the hospital, so they can make sure that you're okay. Will you let us take you, in the ambulance? You'll be safe, it's our job to keep you from harm."
(Y/n)'s teeth sank down into her already chapped and split lower lip and her head twisted to look across at Evan.
She could see the sincerity in his eyes and his smile was soothing, like a lighthouse in a storm, guiding her in the right direction. She didn't want to go to hospital, but she knew she needed to. She knew now she had escaped, she would have to talk to the police. She didn't know what to do or where she would go from here, she had to talk to them so they could help her.
"Can… can you come with me?" She liked the softness in his eyes and his smile, that smile was drawing her in.
And when he held his hand out towards her, (Y/n) didn't think twice before she took it, tangling their fingers together so she could hold his hand close to her chest.
"I'll stay with you until you tell me to go." There was power behind those words. If she wanted him to go into the hospital with her, then that's what he would do. If she wanted him nearby when she talked to the police, he would stay. If she needed someone to hold her hand through this, Evan's hand would be waiting.
He couldn't imagine the pain and the courage it took to run down here and try to find somewhere safe, all on her own. But she didn't have to be on her own anymore. If Evan could make her feel safe and protect her, then that's what he would do.
***
"Don't leave me!"
Evan bit down on his lip, trying his best to control his expression and keep the sorrow from building up in his eyes when he looked down at (Y/n).
The panic written across her face was enough to make his stomach tense and coil up like he was going to be sick. But it was those watering eyes, filled with fright and pain and uncertainty that made Evan's knees quake. He could feel the desperation in her grip when both her hands clutched at his arm like she feared she would disappear if he walked away.
He darted his eyes between her and Athena who was stood by the door, unsure whether to step forward in case she frightened (Y/n).
"Honey we need to examine you-"
"No!"
(Y/n) almost fell off the bed with the way she clung to Evan's arm. She pressed her nose up against his arm that she clutched tightly to her chest and she started to shake with how tightly she clung to him. If he left the room she would follow him. If he walked away from her (Y/n) would leave the hospital and start running.
He kept her safe. He promised to look after her and (Y/n) didn't want him to leave in case something else happened to her.
Evan knew it wouldn't exactly be proper or 'ethical' for him to stay in the room, but what else could he do? If she felt safe with him around, couldn't he just stay by her side and hold her hand?
Athena was here because procedures needed to be followed and she had to interview (Y/n) as soon as she was medically cleared. She would be enough of a presence to make sure nothing else happened to (Y/n) while she was in the hospital and she would keep her safe. But it wasn't the same. Athena hadn't built up the trust with (Y/n) that Evan had.
When Evan looked over at Athena and bit down on his lip, she nodded and looked at the nurse. "He can stay if it will make her feel better."
Relief coursed through all of them when (Y/n) lessened her grip on Evan's arm, but stayed as close to him as she could. She was sat on the edge of the hospital bed in the emergency room, her legs curled beneath her, her body leaning to the right and Evan stood dutifully by the bed.
"Okay," Athena took two tentative steps forward until she was near (Y/n) but not close enough to touch her. "You told Buck here that you had been held somewhere, by someone. Is that right?"
(Y/n) didn't have the nerve to answer, but she nodded, adverting her gaze down to her lap.
"I'll take a statement later, but for now, the nurses will need to see to your wounds, and take photos, if that's okay."
The thought made (Y/n) shiver and she pressed her temple into Evan's arm as if he could somehow make this situation any better. But he couldn't. He knew the procedure. He knew Athena was asking the nurses to do this because they would need to have proof of her injuries and photos in case they found whoever did this.
When the nurse beckoned (Y/n) over, she coiled her arms around her chest and stood behind the curtain she pulled across so Athena and Evan were on the other side. Privacy wasn't something (Y/n) had been accustomed to for a while.
Evan couldn't help but shiver when he heard Athena mutter "Bag the clothes as evidence." To the nurse and pointo the evidence bags.
He was rather surprised that Bobby had cleared him to have the rest of the shift off. Bobby said it was important to help the patient. They usually stopped at the hospital doors and didn't go any further, but Bobby agreed this was a special case. If (Y/n) felt safe with Evan, he had that duty of care towards her and Bobby was more than happy for Evan to stay and make sure she was okay and hand her over into Athena's care later.
It didn't take too long for (Y/n) to get changed into the hospital gown she was given and she was relieved when they were done taking photographs. It wasn't very dignified to have every mark, bruise, cut and blister documented, but she would do whatever they asked if it got them to leave her alone quicker.
Once she moved back towards the bed, (Y/n) climbed up and brought her knees up to her chest. She coiled her arms around her knees and gingerly inched a bit closer to Evan to be safe in his side.
Her body began to shake and she held her breath when the nurse came over with a tray of gauze, antiseptic and bandages.
"It's okay, no one here's gonna hurt you." Evan held his hand out in front of her and waited, silently, to see if (Y/n) would reach out for him. He smiled softly when she clutched at his hand and she carefully dropped her legs when the nurse motioned to her feet.
She was going to clean the cuts and bandage the blisters on her feet. When the second nurse tried to lean over and look at the cut on her temple, (Y/n) flinched. And when her hand came close, (Y/n) jerked her arm out to bat her away. She didn't want anyone touching her. It was hard enough to stay still and not drag her feet away from the nurse who was sat on a stool in front of her, tending to her injuries.
"Let me do that." There was something tender and soft in Evan's voice that stopped (Y/n) from flinching away from him.
She couldn't look anywhere but into those blue eyes when he gently let go of her hand in favour of picking up a cotton swab that he started to dab at the cut in her hairline on her temple. He was careful not to let his hand touch her, only the soft cotton that he swapped a few times and then used a fresh one to add some cream to the cut. It wouldn't need stitches, just a lot of cleaning and some cream applying to it each day.
(Y/n) let her eyes dart down to her feet once she had bandages rolled from the bottom of her toes up towards her ankles. They wouldn't be on for long. Those were annoying. They would slow her down if she had to make another escape. If she had to start running, those bandages were going to come loose or scratch and rub at her feet. Nothing could slow her down.
"You need some IV fluids, you're very dehydrated." The nurse made a point of showing the needle to (Y/n) first so she didn't shock her or panic her, but (Y/n) shook her head all the same.
She inched back on the bed, scuttling until she was almost falling off the other side.
No needles. She didn't want any needles punctured into her skin, she'd had enough of that. It hurt. They made her drowsy. She had to be alert and ready and on edge for anything and everything that could happen.
A gasp tumbled past her lips and she darted her head to the right when Evan gently grasped both her hands and held them towards his lower chest.
"Hey, you're completely safe here. No injections, it's just saline fluids and if you don't like it or it makes you feel sick, I'll take it out for you myself. Okay?"
The unease was written across (Y/n)'s face, but she stopped trying to climb off the bed. She let herself focus on Evan's hand that was gently holding hers and the way his thumb glided over the back of her hand. She closed her eyes, tuning in on the feeling while his other hand held her fingertips so the nurse could set up the IV in the back of her hand.
If she didn't like it, Evan would remove it for her so she didn't hurt herself. If she wanted to go home and she was medically cleared, Evan would take her there. Wherever home was, now. He would make sure she was alright before he left her.
He promised.
***
"Buck? I need your help. That kidnap victim you brought to the hospital, she's gone mute. She won't talk unless you're here."
Athena's words circled round in Evan's head, despite his best efforts to forget her words and push that day to the back of his mind. But he couldn't. He couldn't stop his mind from replaying that day in his mind. He couldn't forget (Y/n)'s broken voice or what she said happened to her.
He could still feel her fingers clutching at his hand. He could feel her knee jittering up and down against the table, bashing into his thigh every now and then. He could still feel her shaking, twisting this way and that to try and stop from reliving each memory she retold.
Evan pushed himself to run faster as if he could outrun his thoughts, his memories. Her voice.
"How long were you kept there?"
"I- I don't know w-what the date is… I lost track of the days."
A month. She had been held captive for a month by someone she didn't know. Someone she had bumped into twice on the street who had decided that first time that she would be his victim.
"How did you escape?"
"He gave me a glass of water… t-the next time he came into the room, I… I smashed it on his head. The front door was unlocked, so I just- I started running."
Her voice followed him as he ran faster than before, following the path that curved around the park and the small lake on his right. Every now and then, Evan glanced at the lake. The morning sun was just starting to rise in the sky and it created beautiful plum purple streaks across the water with hints of burnt orange. He loved how the colours mingled together like a painting. But it didn't do anything to fight off her voice that followed him like a harrowing angel.
He had spent all afternoon down at the police station after Athena convinced the other Sargent that Evan wasn't coercing (Y/n) or forcing her to lie. He was just there for moral support and to give his statement of when he found her at the station.
He had even tagged along when Athena took (Y/n) to her apartment to pick up a few things. She had a roommate, but (Y/n) was going back to stay with her parents for a while. Evan didn't blame her. If he'd been through half of what she had suffered, he wouldn't want to be sitting in a lonely, frightening apartment when his flatmate was at work. Leaving him to stew in his thoughts on his own.
If it were him, he would be running to Maddie, asking her if he could stay with her to feel safe and secure again.
Evan had given her his number and said she could call or message if she needed anything or if she wanted to talk, that had been two days ago. He wanted to message her, but he didn't know what to say.
He couldn't get her out of his head. He couldn't stop hearing her voice as she said what had happened. He couldn't get that frightened face out of his mind. When he closed his eyes, he could still see her laid beneath the ambulance, staring at him like she thought he was a demon come to take her back to Hell.
Evan turned another corner, feeling as if his feet were barely touching the path as he jogged his third loop around the park. Four in the morning was the perfect time to come out for a run. No one else was about and the sun was just starting to rise in the sky.
He sucked in a deep, gasping breath as he tried to continue at this speed, but Evan's feet almost gave out beneath him when a familiar sight caught his attention.
It was her.
He recognised that face, those big saucer eyes that drew him in like black holes. That familiar hair which was now tied back in a much neater fashion, no longer tangled in knots around her face. There was no blood trickling down her head, no dirt beneath her nails and no scratches littering her hands.
She had trainers on and silky jogger leggings on that actually fit her and didn't need to be strapped tight around her hips. She had a purple vest top that also fit with no holes worn into it and no sleeves hanging off her shoulders.
He slowed himself down to a light jog before he veered to the left and slowed down his approach to the bench she was perched on.
When he got closer, he realised she was subtly shaking a little. Her body was arched forward, her elbows on her thighs and her hands clasped together between her legs.
She had been running too.
"Hi." He tried to keep his tone tender and quiet, he didn't want to abruptly pull her from her thoughts or give her a jumpscare.
(Y/n)'s head shot up and she squinted in the changing light to see if it was truly him. She recognised that voice. That rugged voice with a warm edge that made her blood fizzle in her veins and had adrenaline pooling in her stomach.
She couldn't stop the smile that lit up her face when she stared up at him. He was stood in front of her, wearing a loose pair of black shorts and a very thin black vest that clung to his chest like it was a size too small for him. His curls were damp with sweat and starting to stick to his temple and his neck and cheeks were flushed beet red from exertion.
"Hi Evan." She couldn't dampen down her smile and when she shuffled to the left, she was delighted when he sat down next to her. Their knees bumped together and (Y/n) leaned her head to one side so she could look over at him.
"How are you doing?" His knees moved back and forth from one another like repelling magnets and each time his knee touched her leg, (Y/n) tried to lean into the touch.
"Better than I was."
"Mind me asking why you're running at four in the morning?" When she grinned and cast her eyes up and down his frame, Evan chuckled. "My excuse is my shift finished at midnight. What's yours?"
(Y/n) wasn't sure why, but she felt like she could tell Evan the truth. She felt like she could admit what was on her mind and tell him anything. He was safe. He wouldn't judge, he wouldn't laugh or tell her to go get help or that she was being silly. And he seemed to genuinely want to help her, (Y/n) hadn't met anyone like him before.
"I can't sleep. When I escaped and started running I- I didn't feel safe, but for the first time, I knew I had a chance. So I thought running for a while might help… I don't know."
Evan ran his hand across his jaw and down the back of his neck that was layered in sweat, but he didn't laugh or shake his head or look at (Y/n) like she was strange.
He could understand that. (Y/n) had found her escape and she had ran to make sure she got away. She had her freedom from the moment she started running. Now she was home with her parents, she couldn't find out how to make herself feel safe.
Running early in the morning, alone, wasn't a very safe option but it was her choice. (Y/n) felt like she had some control back when she started running. She felt like she was running away from the panic, the anger, the nightmares, the memories. She was leaving them all behind when she started to run.
When his eyes cast up and down (Y/n)'s frame, trying to be subtle, Evan tilted his head to one side. His lips quirked and he made a small movement, gently pointing down towards her feet.
"Trainers hurting you?" He noticed she had slipped her feet out of her trainers and was now tapping her toes against the path.
The shy, slightly panicked look that crossed (Y/n)'s face made Evan feel a little nervous for her, but he wasn't sure why. He watched her look down at her feet, which were no longer bandaged. It had only been three days, Evan would have thought she would of applied fresh bandages to help keep her blisters clean and make it easier to walk.
Come to think of it, Evan wasn't sure running was the best idea when her feet would no doubt still be sore and causing her discomfort.
"I run faster without them." (Y/n) cringed at the hurt that flashed across Evan's face and the realisation that made his lips part and his jaw loosen.
She had been running in her trainer socks. That would re-open her blisters and make her soles ache. But Evan could see the reasoning in her eyes and it made him shiver. She ran barefoot because it would give her that same sense of adrenaline that she had when she escaped. It would push her to run harder and faster if she thought she was being chased. She was running to escape her emotions and try to make herself feel in control again.
"You'll hurt yourself." His voice was quiet and the understanding in his tone showed he wasn't trying to be rude or reprimand her, he was only trying to look out for her. "There are better ways to make yourself faster, you know. You can build up strength and speed, over time. You don't have to push yourself too far right now."
There was no hurry for (Y/n) to be faster, she didn't have to beat any records or run faster than she ever had right now, this morning. There was time to build herself up, if running was something she wanted to do which would calm her down.
"I suppose."
"Look, maybe you'd uh, you'd like a running partner? It might be safer, at this time. And I'd feel better knowing you're not alone."
Evan would rather run with her so she didn't start to panic or feel unsafe. Being out this early or late at night wasn't the best choice after what (Y/n) had been through, although Evan admired her for doing this in the first place. But if they were both out at this time, it made sense to run together.
He would feel better if he ran with her because then he knew if she got panicked or started to have a flashback, she wouldn't be on her own and he might be able to help. And he hoped it might make (Y/n) feel better. She could run alongside him and feel like she was gaining that control back without feeling like she was slipping back into a memory. And he would help her try and run faster or better and build stamina without needing to hurt herself in the process to do it.
Evan thought for a moment that (Y/n) was going to shake her head and kindly decline his offer. He thought maybe he had overstepped the mark or intruded on her personal space.
But when she inched closer to him and leaned her head on his shoulder, Evan found himself relaxing against her.
"I'd like that."
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