#better than spoons ship art

[paigeysworldd]

Tag list!

paigeysworld - general me tag

paigey rambles - talking tag

paigey writes - writing tag

paigey art - art tag

i love this! - reblog tag

better than spoons - ship art

im looking gooooooood! - au tag

excuse me im on the banana - ask tag

paigeysworld friends tag! - friends

Character Specific Tags!

💚 ell/eddie tag

💙 tom tag

💜 matt tag

❤️ tord tag

🎳 tamara tag

🪞 matilda tag

📌 tori tag

🔐 eduardo tag

📘 jon tag

📚 mark tag

💐 kim and kataya tag

💤 laurel tag

✏️ ocs tag

[foldingfittedsheets]

How come you stopped working in jewelry sales?

It was a bunch of factors. So first- it’s sales. I’m someone who maxed out charisma based skills but it’s work, it’s very draining. I would come home and have no spoons left for my beloved and that sucked.

My health was also declining and I didn’t know why. Working a very busy job was worsening my mystery illness and by the end I was fainting at work and crying when I woke up because I was so exhausted and my day hadn’t even started yet.

Right around the same time I started to break down toward the idea of going back to school to pursue art. My best friend was singing the siren song and I was getting more interested by the day.

Lastly… I am a simple creature. I like to enjoy what I sell because I won’t sell things I can’t get behind. Selling engagement rings was okay, but selling jewelry in general struck me as so… pointless.

People would come in and drop more than my yearly salary on a mineral chunk because they liked it while I made less than I did selling beds. The company treated me well but the product didn’t make me feel great.

And regardless of the company, selling a bed feels wholesome. Everyone needs to sleep and benefits from rest. I loved selling sex toys for the same reason. It’s a meaningful way to boost someone’s lived experience.

So when my illness struck me down to the point I could barely move, and covid hit the world, I jumped ship. It was the perfect timing for me and honestly if not for that pandemic I’m not sure how I would have survived. It acted as disability pay and gave me room to switch gears.

When I finished school and the game market crashed I looked at both jewelry and beds again. But jewelry is still a bit too fast paced for current me and my friends at the company inform me it’s gone downhill. Mattresses are low key enough for me to handle if I only work four days and I like to better people’s lives and I get to work on personal projects at work cause largely it’s very slow.

[szynkaaa]

Mandatory relationship graph to get to know my ship(s) better. And yes, two graphs because I see DO and SWK as two different person and the dynamics would differ too.

Some thoughts

I have SWK listed up taller than DO - in my AU, the DO starts out being 160cm tall and then grows with each artifact he collects. It's also why in some of my art you can see DO being taller than Oz, or the same height as her.

By the time the journey comes to an end, Oz's hair has grown longer. She's still undecided about cutting it or not.

I don't think the DO has a high horny level, I think he is faaaar too focused on completing his quest of obtaining all the artifacts. But he does get flustered very easily when Oz sometimes grabs his hand or clings on to him cause something scared her, or when she compliments him.

DO does very easily get jealous though, he is a wee bit possessive. He does't like seeing other people or yaoguai get close to her, it makes him want to just wrap his arms around her and not let her go while glaring thousand daggers at the other person. He was not happy when Oz jokingly asked if the Yin Tiger is married and if not he would marry her.

DO and Oz switches between big and small spoon, although I think the taller DO grows the more he prefers to be the big spoon. SWK is the big spoon no questions asked ("You're such a koala sheesh." "I do not know what this koala you speak of is.")

With DO, Oz had lot's of different names to call him, mostly just to get his attention. "oi, you. Monkie. Kiwi. Peach. Luffy (kudos if you get the reference)".

With Su Wukong, it's mostly him that has the endearing nicknames for her, stuff like 樱花 (Yīnghuā, cherryblossom bc of her hair color), 心肝宝贝(heart and liver treasure), darling, princess, my queen.

I don't see Oz having a lot of nicknames for SWK though, she'll most likely refer to him with Wukong. If she is calling him The Great Sage, Your Highness, Your Majesty, she is being sarcastic.

There is no confession between DO and Oz, I think both are being far too busy trying to survive, with one trying to get all the artifacts and the other trying to go home. But there is no doubt that they care for each other and have become good friends.

SWK confesses first. My HC is that after the whole journey to the west + buddhahood + leaving buddhahood + gamble and plan his death + the experience and memories he gaines as DO traveling with Oz made him a lot more mature and appreciate the things he has in his long (immortal) life. And that includes Oz. Of course he still maintains a mischievious streak. He knows what he wants and he wants to be with her. He also knows that she has other shit to deal with, like the Celestial Court trying to put a leash on her now (because family history) and that she is still looking for a way back home, so he tell her how he feels, but that he understands she has other priorities at the moment, aaaand that he will continue to support her and be her friend, but also that he will wait for her because what is another 500 years of waiting ("yeah i don't think I'm gonna live that long.")

also also, SWK is definitely the hornier one. But he doesn't get jealous or possesive like DO does. He is very secure in himself and he trusts his partner. Ofc if someone is being pushy and makes Oz uncomfortable he will step in ASAP

I've also marked DO as having no relationship experience because I don't see him as having any, i feel like all his life he was preparing for this quest. But since he gets SWK memories after he finishes the quest, I do think that makes him having some experience? Especially since the game mentiones SWK and White Bone Demon were a thing, and he was im trever able to let her go and it was one of the reasons he left buddhahood. Idk about you but I do think that indicates a deep bond they had.

aaaaand that's it. Here is the empty template for those who also want to do it:

[winters-on-the-wing]

Oh what you said responding to the ask about transphobia/bigotry I've been looking for the right way to describe it: hard to romanticize! Thats like the foundation of this fandom it seems. Everything is whitewashed and stripped down to its bare bones to be the most relatable and palatable shit! Complexity for this fandom is babying regulus and feeling bad because his brother (rightfully so) left home. Like cmon are we not capable of being deeper than that. We base everything on the most bland tropes like brother's best friend and grump x sunshine! Truly moving and deep literature explores people in 3d not the 2d shells of people that can be described in singular words/attributes that bastardize them and make them walking caricatures of people (eg; Marlene = lesbian, Mary = pretty, James = sunshine, remus = wolf, and so on) the best art isn't easily palatable! The movies that leave you feeling ill or uncomfortable (in the good way) for lack of a better word are usually some of the best films. I feel like even aside from the racism, sexism and other problems of that sort, this fandom just lacks depth? We gave ourselves full creative power over these characters and bastardized them and it makes me so sad. There are so many smart and deep people in this fandom and I wish their analysis and ideas about the fabdom were he more popular ones instead of the ones that are easy to romanticize. Let's see conflict, not everyone has to be friends, people can be complex and not completely bad or good. Make them have complicated relationships outside of ships. What are the odds of about 13 people (the most popular characters) ALL finding their soul mates in highschool??? Like u can have sm fun exploring these characters but noooooooo. Ok sry for rambling, I'm a yapper. I'll stfu now

no. don’t stfu. never stfu.

you are absolutely right and you really boiled down something i’ve always been frustrated with.

i’m an actor. it’s my JOB to take characters from text, to see words on paper, usually ONLY dialogue and stage directions, and create a person, a fully fleshed person with wants and goals and fears and a soul. it’s my job to use the clues that the canon text provides and make the character pop out of the page, to make them compelling, to make them HUMAN.

if it’s not human, who the fuck cares? i know i sure dont.

i don’t want to read about plastic robots as they go through all the tired, stale tropes. grumpy x sunshine, enemies to lovers, best friends brother. it’s all the same. it’s a formula. it’s spoon feeding. i’m not trying to hate on people who enjoy it but i just can’t imagine being satisfied with that. the barest touch of the surface level when there’s so much if you go deeper. so much more HUMANITY. so much more meaning.

i need grit. i need people with palpable flaws, people who don’t always get what they want falling into their laps when they want it, people who are IN THE WRONG. people who think bad things and do bad things and regret it, people who do bad things and don’t regret it. people who exist messily. people who make me uncomfortable to read about because they’re so like me and i have to face the fact that i’m not perfect.

i don’t want a perfect romanticized story where the little white boy gets rescued by the big muscular casanova. i don’t want a robotic generated formula where the perfectly placed lesbian couple get just enough sentences to be seen so that the author can feel progressive and inclusive and then the lesbians get shoved off and forgotten about forever.

what happened to authenticity? what happened to bringing a piece of your soul to the art you create?

again i’m not trying to tell people how to enjoy fandom. do what you want.

it just personally saddens me how hard it is to find work with that human spark in it. the spark of curiosity, of intrigue, of going deeper than the bare surface level. i love art that makes me think. why does nobody THINK while creating anymore? sometimes i just feel so alone in this, surrounded by plastic when i want to read and write and engage with work that was written with a beating heart so palpable that it can be heard between every word.

i wish fanfics and headcanons and concepts that were created with thought were more popular than they are, instead of the same bland thing being shoved down my throat every second of the day. i constantly get hated on in this fandom for thinking differently than everyone else, but why is individuality an enemy? im starting to think that i get hated on in this fandom for THINKING, period.

does that make sense?

maybe i’m pretentious. it’s highly likely i’m pretentious.

[lucathy143]

Things that make the Who made me a princess novel and manhwa different:

There are many things that make the Who made me a princess or Suddenly I became a princess novel and manhwa different. I prefer the plot line of novel better and just the novel in general, but the art of the manhwa is without a doubt beautiful.

The novel and the manhwa first begin to differ after Athanasia’s debutante. The manhwa really begins to separate from the manhwa once Claude loses his memories. Here are scenes that show up in the novel but not the manhwa. I also explain the differences between the two. If it has (novel) in the beginning of the bullet point, it means that its a scene that didn't make the manhwa at all.

But there are three things I need to make clear before I beging.

An important to make clear before i begin is that Anastacius in the novel was actually killed by Claude, and was never possessed by Aeternitas. Aeternitas possesses a man and pretends to be the magician of the black tower (the magician of the black tower is actually Lucas) which the man comes when Athy is 14. Claude knows the man is a fake, and so does Lucas but neither of them do anything.He pretends to be the magician of the black tower until athy is 18.

Another thing is that the manhwa focuses mostly about family and that's why Athy never ends up with anyone (though she goes on a date with Lucas). In the novel, it's about family, growth, friendship and romance. She does end up with Lucas (sorry to those who ship Athy with Ezikiel) and there a lot more moments between Lucas and Athy in the novel. The novel is just better in general, I'm sorry.

The last thing to make clear is Jennette in the manhwa is different in the manhwa and novel. In the manhwa she is unrealistic and naive and i hate it. in the manhwa, she gets over the fact everyone lied to her about her family too easily. Her reaction to not actually being Athy's sister and Claude's daughter in the manhwa is so unrealistic. Jennette leaves with her uncle and lives "happily ever after." thats why so many people hate Jennette in the manhwa, because she is naive. Spoon portrays her different and makes her seem that she is always happy, and forgives everyone for lying to her, but she is different in the novel. Jennette isn't as naive. tbh Jennette does say some rude things, but its better than Jennette being all innocent and being fine after everything that happened to her. if all that happened to me, i would react just as Jennette does in the novel. in general, jennette's character is so much better in the novel. but then shit goes down but i will explain that later because i am making this in chronological order...

After Lucas leaves for the World Tree, Athanasia gets caught up in a mana explosion causing Claude to lose his memories. Like the manhwa, Athanasia wakes up after fifteen days and visits Claude. But in the novel, Athanasia doesn’t figure out Claude has amnesia until later on.

in the novel Athanasia doesn’t see Claude for days after he wakes up after saving Athy from the explosion. She’s confused as to why he hasn’t visited her and tries to sneek into his palace multiple times but Felix and Lily don’t let her. Unlike the manhwa, Lily tells her that Blackie is fine and that Claude is suffering from amnesia. That doesn’t happen in the novel.

One day when Lily and Felix aren’t there, she leaves her room. Hannah tries to stop Athanasia as she looks everywhere for Blackie, but is unable to find him. Lily comes, and Athanasia thinks that Claude is the one that killed Blackie (because he tried to the last time she coughed blood). Athy believed the reason Claude wasn’t visiting her was because he was guilty he killed Blackie (which isn’t true). Athanasia goes to his palace and finds him in his garden. Felix tells her to leave and gets all protective (which was cute and i wish all these scenes were added) but Athy ignores and asks Claude if he killed Blackie. Claude isn't very nice to her (like the manhwa) and confines Athanasia to the Emerald palace.

After she meets Claude in the garden, Lily and Felix tell her that Claude was suffering from amnesia. So in the novel, she wasn't told about Claude's amnesia nor Blackie's disappearance. Another difference is that Athy gets over Blackie's death much easier in the manhwa. In the novel she takes much longer to get over it.

Athanasia begins learning magic and tries to use money like Lucas did, and they come out non stop. There is a huge pile of coins and Athy falls asleep on them and Lily finds her.

The novel of Who made me a Princess and Beware of the Brothers are written by the same author. This is very important because Cabel Ernst (the second oldest brother) appears in the novel a lot because he is the third male lead. (its cool how the stories connect with one another) He was also Ezikiel's school friend. Cabel doesn't show up once in the manhwa. (i will mention more scenes with Cabel in it later on)

There is actually a scene in the Who made me a princess novel where Athanasia and Hari Ernst (fl of Beware of the Brothers meet). Athy is hiding from Claude in Artlanta on the top of the ceiling of Ezikiel old school. Hari sees through her disguise and they talk for a little. Hari is rushes by Erich to leave but drops her necklace. For the next couple of days Athy tries to find an opportunity to give it back, but eventually gives up and leaves and accidentally teleports to Claude's room (like the manhwa) and then goes back to Artlanta. Athy goes back into the school to return the necklace. Athy meets Cabel then.

Athanasia stays in disguise as a student in Artlanta for a little while before she sees Jennette in the novel. Eventually, she gets to talk to Hari once again and returns the neckalace. She meets Cabel again when she's talking to Hari.

That's when Athanasia realizes that Cabel was the second male lead of Lovely Princess.

Athanasia goes to check on Jennette and sees Duchess Alpheus (Ezekiel's mother), who doesn't show up once in the manhwa. Ezekiel, the duke and the duchess are all wearing black and Athanasia is confused as to why. She figures out that Jennette's aunt passed away. Jennette doesn't beg Duke Alpheus to go to the funeral like the manhwa and remains her room. Ezekiel goes to look for Jennette in her room and hugs her while she's crying. Ezikiel actually comforts her unlike in the manhwa.

The day Athy goes with Jennette to the festival, two boys approach them and try to harass them. But Athy screams at them and swears at them (using very... interesting language). And they get really mad and tries to hurt them, but she creates a candy ball the size of her head and hits both of the boy's balls. She ate that up fr.

Athanasia in the manhwa stops living in hiding because Jennette tells her that Claude doesn't want to kill her anymore. That doesn't happen in the novel. In the novel, she looks at the parade and sees Claude from very far away and decides that she will visit the Emerald Palace when Claude's away. When she teleports, Lily is on the sofa doing embroidery. But Claude made a doppelgänger of himself to appear at the parade, and tricked Athanasia into thinking he wouldn't be there so she would go home. Claude used Lily as bait, but Lily did it willingly because she knew Claude wouldn't hurt her. Athy realized if Claude really wanted to kill her, he would've done it ages ago, and decides to talk with her. Athy ends up crying and Claude apologizes and hugs her.

(novel) Lily tells Athy that Claude would admire the portrait of them two everyday and would watch the video stone. Lily also says that she thinks of Athanasia of as her own daughter. (this is such a cute scene).

In the manhwa, Athanasia begins having tea parties with Jennette and Claude, but that doesn't happen once in the novel.

(novel) Athanasia doesn't forgive Claude for what he did right away. She refuses to visit Claude first. Lily and Felix encourage her to visit Claude first, but Ces agrees with Athy to play hard to get. Claude visits two later and they have lunch together. (cute scene) Athy brewed Lippe tea for him and she says that she might've poisoned it and Claude says he would drink even if it was poisoned anyway because she gave it to him.

(novel) Athy has a nightmare and goes to Claude's palace in the middle of the night because she's scared. She visits him in his office and he picks her up and carries her to his room. When Athanasia is laying down in the bed, she tells Claude that she wants to meet her mom. Claude says "me too."

(novel) Athy wants to go outside for the night and asks Claude for permission. Claude says no but Athy encourages him that no matter where she goes that she will always come back. When she's back from the festival she gifts Claude cotton candy.

(novel) Athy meets the mages (not magician which is lucas) of the black tower.

the headmaster asks athy for a strand of hair or blood for experiment and claude gets so mad he blows up half of the tower. eventually Lucas blows up the other

(novel) Claude comes to athy's 15th birthday and spends the entire day with her

LUCAS RETURNS! in the novel Lucas returns from the World Tree, he takes Athanasia to Claude and sticks the World Tree into him and then Athanasia. This is different from the manhwa because it happens right on her 15th birthday, and it is a much simpler process than in the manhwa.

**Everything from now on only happens in the novel because Athy never turns 18 in the manhwa**

Jennette hosts a picnic at her estate and Athy attends (they are 17 now) During the picnic, Duke Alpheus and Ezekiel got "lost" while hunting and end up at the picnic. Duke Alpheus was actually worried about Jennette who was hosting a picnic for the first time. (which is actually adorable). Ezekiel kisses Athy's hand (which had gloves) to say goodbye. After the picnic, Lucas appears in the carriage and gifts Athy new gloves that were better than the old ones

Athy meets the fake magician of the tower. He asks Athy if she believes in karma and then asks if she believes in reincarnation. After telling Lucas, he leaves without giving a proper response. When he does, Athy swings a pillow at the air and he teleports back because he forgot to tell her something and gets hit. She almost fell and he caught her.

Athy has a tea party and Lucas visits and notices that Helena likes him. Athy and Lucas are talking about her and Athy lies saying Helena is interested in magic. He asks why Athy is so scared of Lucas when he hasn't done anything bad in front of her or to someone else.

Athy brings up the bubbles that Lucas created when they first met (to kill her). Lucas lies saying that he didn't try to kill her, and create regular bubbles for her and Athy pops them.

Athy mentions how cute he used to be when he was a child so Lucas transforms. She squeezes his cheeks so much and Lucas tells her to stop. She doesn't stop, so Lucas changes to adult form. When Athanasia releases her hands, he tells Athanasia to keep squishing his cheeks.

A mage of the Black Tower tells Lucas that the headmaster took some of Athanasia's hair and destroys the entire lab

There is a banquet Athy attends to that's hosted at the palace for the Artlantan ambassadors that are visiting (including Cabel Ernst) Before the banquet Athy sits on angel statue to see them at the parade. Cabel sees her and calls out "MISS FAIRY?"

(novel) Duke Seloid says things about how Athy can't protect herself and is weak because she is a women. Athanasia breaks a knife and a fork with her bare hands. Claude also broke his utensils and plate in anger

Cabel gifts Athanasia a flower from her own flower garden. When Athanasia goes back to her room and Lucas sees it, he gets jealous. Lucas feeds the flower to her bird, Bluey, and buries Athanasia in a pile of flowers.

Athanasia visits Jennette, Ezekiel and Cabel on the training grounds in secret. Ezekiel and Cabel have a battle and tie and go to Jennette after. They see Athanasia and approach her. They decided to have another match and Ezekiel wins. Lucas shows up to the training grounds and Cabel wants to battle him. Lucas beats him completely

Later on in the novel, it shows Jennette's POV of what happened. After Athanasia leaves, Jennette tells Ezekiel to go check on Cabel's condition and leaves her alone on the grounds. Jennette mentions that ever since she met Claude in the garden during Athy's picnic she had felt so depressed (which was 3 years ago). This is so much more realistic than the way the manhwa makes it. Anyone would feel depressed if their supposed "father" didn't accept them. Jennette also says that's she's jealous of Athanasia.

Athanasia attends a hunting competition. Cabel asks for Athy's handkerchief. This scene is funny because Athy doesn't have one so she asks Felix if he can give his to Cabel.

Athy's shoe gets stuck in mud during the hunting competition. Ezekiel helps her and Felix leaves alone in the tent. Athy can tell Ezekiel likes her, and starts to say that she doesn't like him back. He says he sometimes would like to lock Athanasia in a bird cage so she would at least see him more (which was a concerning confession...)

Lucas shows up to Athanasia who feels bad for rejecting Ezekiel. Lucas heard her reject him. Athanasia admits that at one point she did have a crush on Ezekiel, but not anymore. Lucas says that he "doesn't have pathetic thoughts like wanting to lock you inside a bird cage" and that "the entire world is a birdcage on his palm."

Like I said earlier, in the novel, Athanasia takes longer to get over Blackie disappearance. She tried not to get any new animals because they reminded her of Blackie. This leads to Lucas bringing her a new pet, and she names it Nox.

Athanasia is talking with Lily one night and asks if she wants to get married. Lily says that she doesn't need to get married and that Athy is like a child to her. Athy says she feels that Lily is like her real Mom and that she has two moms.

Lucathy's date on a lake. (on top of the water)

The final party before the Artlantan ambassadors leave. Funniest part about this is that Claude planned to arrive half way through the party (Athy later figures out because he doesn't want to dance with her and get his feet stepped on)

Ezekiel asks Athanasia to dance, right when she is about to respond Lucas shows up in adult form and asks her to dance. He takes her and dances with her. (i love this scene sm) Lucas admits he hates dancing but still continues to dance with her.

Jennette and Ezekiel are talking in the hallway after Athy started dancing. Jennette tells Ezekiel that even though he likes Athanasia, she will never like him back- just the way that Ezekiel will never like Jennette back. Jennette wanted to make Ezekiel angry because she feels he doesn't care for her all. That Ezekiel only does anything with her just to be polite. Instead of getting angry, Ezekiel simply rejects her.

Outside the party, while Lucas and Athy are dancing and after Jennette was rejected, Jennette meets Claude. Lucas and Athanasia feel a wave of magic outside and go out there. Jennette was outside crying where she finds Claude. She takes her ring off to reveal her gem eyes and calls out "father."

Lucas and Athanasia arrive at the scene and she forces Lucas to get rid of Jennette's black magic

Everyone is in shock. Felix doesn't even recognize Lucas in his adult form.

A day passes and Jennette was told that her father was not Claude, but his brother Anastacius. Jennette is devasteted and hates how she has been lied to all these years. She doesn't know what she has sinned, even says "the sin of being born."

Athanasia let Jennette stay at the Emerald Palace not as a criminal, but as guest. Felix is leading Jennette to the carriage when Jennette sees Ezekiel and Athanasia. Jennette felt hatred to all her loved ones, and then she thinks that she would rather disappear from the world than hate them.

The bracelet Lucas gave to Jennette to control her black magic breaks at the negative thought. Ezekiel runs towards her, and Jennette thinks that it was the first time Ezekiel ever cared about her.

Athy controls her black magic before anything happens because Lucas taught her the night before.

Lucas brings the fake black tower's magician beaten up (Aeternitas) and officially introduces himself as the Black Tower's Magician.

Lucas brings Aeternitas and Jennette to Claude. He tells Aeternitas to eat Jennette's black magic. He is refusing. But Claude says that he doesn't''t care if Jennette dies or not. Athy glares at him and Claude flinches and says that he wants Aeternitas to fix Jennette because Athy wants to. (Claude really doesn't want Athanasia to hate him).

Aeternitas also reincarnates and remembers his past life (just like Athy). Lucas is the only one that remembers him each life. He promises Aeternitas that he will greet him first in his next life if he helps Jennette. Aeternitas is so moved he also removed her jeweled eyes.

Claude tells Athanasia he blames himself for everything that happened. That when he realized him and Felix, Lily, Hannah and Ces etc. couldn't comfort her loneliness he placed friends her age. But the friends were Lucas, the Black Tower's Magician who lived hundreds of years. And Jennette, the daughter of Claude's enemy. (claude really cares for her it's so cute)

Claude tells Athy to not get too close to Lucas. Athanasia defends Lucas and Claude asks if she has been bewitched by him

The last chapter of the novel Lucas kisses Athy the night before she turns 18, at midnight. (best chapter ever i swear)

Sidestories

Another Busy Day as 18 (Lucas gives Athanasia a dragon for her 18th birthday and Athanasia goes out with Claude outside the palace)

Became a Princess in Wonderland (Athy by accidentally switched to the Lovely Princess dimension)

Lucas (Lucas' backstory, his childhood up to when he meets Athy, it's actually quite sad)

Became a Dad One Day (Claude's POV of meeting Athy)

What Happens When Lucas from a Parallel World Crosses Dimensions (this is a sequel to Became a Princess in Wonderland, it's when Lovely Princess Lucas goes through many dimensions to find Athy and he sees many different universes)

girl i was so bored so i decided to do this and didn't expect it to be so long. but i wanted to reread the novel so i reread while spotting the differences and (most of) the scenes that aren't in the novel.

[malleux]

Hello hope you are doing well. Could you do some headcannon of genshin short men with a tall (around 170) fem reader please. Feel free to ignore this and have a great day/night. Bye 👋

short men, tall s/o.

-> xiao, kazuha, albedo x fem!reader

-> warnings: cursing, mentions of insecurity

a/n: first request back! yay! i hope you enjoy it. i couldn’t choose every short king in the game to stay true to my 3 character limit and keep my fics from being a million miles long, but if there was someone specific you were hoping for that isn’t here, feel free to send me another ask! 170cm is approximately 5’7.

xiao

I really and truly don’t think Xiao would care too much. No matter your height, he’s just surprised you like him.

In his past, the other Yakshas definitely teased him about being small, but it wasn’t necessarily anything that majorly embarrassed him. This kind of changes, though, if you tease him. He’s not used to the height jokes with romantic affection behind them— he knows you love him no matter what.

But I do think that the longer you’re with him, and the more the jokes persist, he might let it get to him a little. Not because he wants to change his height, but because other people are right— it’s pretty typical for the guy to be taller than their girlfriends.

The fact that he doesn’t fit this stereotype makes him kind of weary. He prepares himself for you to leave him for someone taller. He’s not going to let you know this, though. You figured it out because of how snappy he was getting one day.

“I just think that you would benefit more from someone… better.” He skirt around the main reason, “More equipped for giving you a traditional relationship.”

It takes a minute, but you do successfully reassure him that you don’t want a traditional romance. You want him.

It quells his fears for the time being. Once Xiao gets into his head about not deserving you, it takes a bit to get him out. But you’re there to reassure him every step of the way.

kazuha

Kazuha’s actually convinced you’re a work of art. He’s not wrong, and he’d worship the ground you walked on regardless of height, but you’re a Goddess.

Beidou is tall, and you both get along like a house on fire. More short jokes. Kazuha battles them by comparing you to a tree in his writing, his comebacks hidden in flowery words declaring his love while you and Beidou outright bully him.

It gets a little difficult when you’re tasked something inside the lower levels of the ship. Having to duck sometimes makes your back ache at the end of the day. Kazuha will gladly swap chores with you if you need to.

Back to the poetry. It’s fucking divine.

All I can think about is Kazuha going on a poetic tangent about your legs— long, smooth, beautiful. He starts from your ankles to the top of your head, the paper practically oozing honey with how sweet he is. He’s in love fr.

“You act like all of this is going to hide the jab you made at me in the beginning of the poem.” You’d snicker, “Not working.”

Kazuha would play dumb, assuring you that there was no jab all while fighting a smile that tried to come across his face. “No, darling. Never.”

You’d roll your eyes and kiss him anyways, appreciating the sweet gestures and secretly plotting your revenge.

albedo

Albedo… another man who really wouldn’t mind.

I think he’d utilize your height. He needs something from the top shelf in his lab? He’s asking you. Collecting ingredients? You’re tasked with the ones on the trees.

He wears your lab coat sometimes when you’re away, because it smells like you. The longer sleeves get in his way, but he’s very adaptable.

Albedo likes being the little spoon, so the fact that he can curl up like that with you every night is heaven to him. He feels safe and protected for the first time in his life— he can finally relax with you curled around him.

“You need to sleep, Albedo.” You’d pester him, peeking out of your shared bedroom in the dead of night. “You can barely keep your eyes open.”

“I’ll be fine.” He’d yawn.

You, just as stubborn as your lover, do not take that answer. Instead, you pad towards him and gently cover him with the blanket wrapped around your shoulders, your chest pressing against his back. You immediately feel Albedo relax, and begin slightly pulling at him, beckoning him to bed in hushed whispers. It always works.

You’re kind of a body guard to him, whether you mean to be or not. When he’s in Monstadt speaking to someone or buying equipment or materials, you kind of stand behind him and let him do his thing. It’s not your fault that you’re slightly menacing and would probably kill anyone who bothered him.

[the-l-spacer]

001 for espresso and madeline teehee

THE SCRUNKLIES!!!! (from the character + ship asks!)

when I started shipping it if I did:

I've been an espresseleine truther since CRK launch day in 2021 alskdjfkd I played through their 'We've Never Met' story and was down so bad for them ever since-

my thoughts:

AUGHHH comfort ship of all time!!! I kinda miss the days in like 2021/2022 when everyone was going crazy making art and fic for them... their dynamic is just so fun and I love every interaction they have!

What makes me happy about them:

I love how, despite their surface differences, theyre both really similar people deep down, and because of that, they Get each other, even if they clash at first. They're both competent, prideful, meticulous, and care about the people around them, even if they show it in their own ways - different but same!!

I also like the little ways they’re changing for the better because of each other - Madeleine being more willing to give of himself, even at the cost of his image, and Espresso letting down his guard and finally allowing himself to relax!

What makes me sad about them:

At the moment, their relationship is mostly in stasis, since they’re not as relevant to the main story anymore (which I get but it also means there hasn’t been any new content for them since like 2022 ;w;)

things done in fanfic that annoys me:

Admittedly, I don't read much fanfic of them (I'm really picky with the kinds of stories I read) so I've never come across anything that outright annoyed me, but I do tend to steer away from stories that portray either of them as ‘the villain’ / ‘enemies to lovers’ bc that’s not a dynamic I’m interested in, or think is true to their canon storylines

things I look for in fanfic:

Probably the way they portray each character, in terms of their way of speaking, and their mannerisms and motivations (If I’m reading and can hear the lines of dialogue in the voice of their VAs, it’s a W fic for me-)

Who I’d be comfortable them ending up with, if not each other: 

Espresso x nap and Madeleine x a reality check lol

My happily ever after for them:

I’d like for them to have a nice reunion in the Vanilla Kingdom, probably after some months (or even years) spent growing on their own. Either Madeleine would decide to settle down and become the kingdom’s protector (realising that it’s no less heroic than his previous endeavours), or Espresso, having learned all he could, opens Coffee Magic schools around Earthbread, and him and Madeleine spend the rest of their time travelling and having more adventures together!

who is the big spoon/little spoon:

Madeleine big spoon always and forever <3 but when he’s having a hard day Espresso takes over bc even Madeleine needs to be snuggled from time to time :3

what is their favorite non-sexual activity:

Just having a nice meal and shooting the shit tbh (they’d probably bond over good food and gossip)

Also my hc is that they love seeing the other thriving and fully in their element, and they’d take every opportunity to do so - even if it means Espresso pausing in the middle of battle to admire Madeleine, or Madeleine sitting with starry eyes and his chin in his hand while Espresso explains an alchemical concept Madeleine couldn’t hope to understand <3

[headspacedad]

AI and the Red Delicious Apple

If you’re reading this you’re pretty much already on the anti-AI bandwagon when it comes to its promise to steal our written works and then regurgitate them in strung-together, passably readable form in order to replace us.  You’ve seen the same, very valid, arguments against letting this happen that I have and the same, also very valid, warnings.  There is no human reason a computer should be doing something humanity has done with pleasure and without prompting, for enjoyment alone, all the way back to the beginning dusty start of time - unless you want to strip the humans out of the equation and make a profit that way, which is what this is about.  I’m preaching to the choir when I say this is far and away beyond the Bad of a Bad Idea.  What I haven’t seen mentioned though is how this is going to effect the other side of the equation.  Not the creators of art -

the receivers of it.

Once upon a time, not that long ago, in the 1880s, a farmer had a rouge plant pop up in his apple orchard.  He uprooted it but the next year it was back.  He got rid of it again and, again, it came back.  Finally, he did the sensible thing and just let the plant grow.  Sure enough, it popped out apples after a time and he entered those apples in a tasting contest - because.... those were a thing back in Ye Olden Times apparently.  Anyway, wham bam thank you ma’am! They won the contest and the taste buds of the judges.  In short order the Apples, known as Stark Delicious, hit the stores and became an overwhelming favorite across the US.  They lived up to their name for sure and soon became known as Red Delicious Apples.  Farmers everywhere focused in on one type of apple and one type of apple alone as the demand for them surged.  Everyone wanted Red Delicious and so that’s what everyone planted.  Here’s the thing though.  Uniformity is king in situations like this and, instead of more Red Delicious apple trees leading to more variety, it actually led to more uniformity.  The ‘off parts’ of the apples were bred out, unattractive yellow streaks in their color, the thin skin that let them bruise easier during shipping, all the unattractive parts were left by the wayside.  Red Delicious apples soon looked as good as they tasted.  

Except - they didn’t really taste that good anymore. 

It turns out that in breeding them for uniformity and looks dropped the factors that gave them their flavor as well.  In time, every apple was a carbon copy of the apple before it and the end result was mushy flavorless thick skinned, albeit pretty, looking apples.  These days, consumers hardly touch them and farmers have started uprooting their Red Delicious in favor of Gala and the like.  Nobody liked Red Delicious anymore because there’s nothing left of what once made them delicious.

AI regurgitates what its been fed.  When its fed variety it regurgitates, to some extent, variety.  It’s intended to put the human oddities out of business, so to speak and take its place.  To turn out polished, pretty things to appeal to people’s tastes.  And, after a while, when humanity is out of the picture, it will only have other AIs to feed off of.  In time, the variety in its cannibalization will continue to narrow down as the stories become more and more alike as nothing new gets put in, as it simply tells the same ten stories, then the same five stories, than the same three over and over again.  Until its just the same words, strung together differently, with the same theme, the same character, the same half-nonsense story.  Until the inside of that story, that piece of art, that movie are all the same mealy, uninteresting mush that every other one is.  The yellow streaks and the thin skin of humanity phased out along with any hint of flavor.  The profitability will dry up as even the most spoon-fed, computer worshipers demand better.  Humanity will pick up where it left off, figuring out how to tell its own stories, paint its own art, sing its own songs and entertain its neighbors again.  Art is intrinsic to humans.  We always find our way back to it.

But the damage to the creative world in the meantime will be like a nuclear winter.  And who knows how long it will take generations raised on ‘Red Delicious’ apples to realize there are better flavors out there.

PS - nobody pushing for AI art right now cares that its not long term sustainable or that it won’t always be profitable.  It will make them money now.  The future they ruin will be someone else’s problem.  They know that.  

They’ve always known that.

[zombolouge]

Stained Like Glass Chapter 29

art (above and below) by my favorite enabler, @miliabyntite

Chapter 29: Duplicitous Bastard is now live!

HI. SORRY FOR THE LONG WAIT. I explained in the notes, but basically I got the spoons for cleaning and tried to maximize their utilization because y'all my place NEEDED it after so much illness and depression the last year or so XD

Anyways, the Nevarran crew finally arrives at the Lighthouse, which adds a few more layers to our narrative. :)

“Say no more, I understand.” Lucanis placed a hand on her shoulder, and Hazel warmed as though he powered her himself. “Think you can handle a tour, warden?” That question was aimed at Davrin, and it bore so much acidity that it was a wonder it didn’t burn through their ear drums. “Probably better than an assassin would, Crow.” The hostility was not one-sided, apparently. Hazel glanced at both of them with sharp authority. “We’ll discuss this later.” “Nothing to discuss.” Lucanis bowed, both to Hazel and then to Davrin, as he backed his way out of the room. “I was only making sure our comrade needed no help.” A lie as sweet as it was false, like a cake that promised you could have it and eat it too.

ALSO. ONE LAST NOTE. Magreniah's OG creator (and my cherished cover artist listed above) has seen fit to bless us with art of her outfit. EVERYBODY STARE AT THE ART AND GUSH ABOUT IT IN THE COMMENTS. REBLOG THIS POST WITH LUSTFUL PRAISE. LOOK AT OUR GIRL. LOOK AT HER BEING HOT AND MEAN. Twirling my hair and giggling, hoping Mag will insult me like I matter. <3 Thank you forever to @miliabyntite for letting me obsess over her. Especially since I've decided to give her a ship in this fic, and today she'll finally run into it. :) Tags have been updated accordingly. ;)

[optiwashere]

This seemed fun, so why not do this for my babies? Portraits taken from art in this post.

Some elaborations under the cut...

Stats

Ages are at the end of BG3. Shadowheart is at least late 40s in canon, but I always had her as 50 in my mind. She has her birthday in my fic canon during the post-Absolute Crisis rebuilding while Asheera's won't be for another few months.

Asheera is ~201cm tall, Shadowheart is ~170cm tall. Roughly 31cm height difference!

Ship Parameters

Shadowheart and Asheera both enjoy being the big spoon and little spoon, but Shadowheart prefers being nestled in Asheera's embrace. Doesn't mean for a bit that the roles aren't reversed now and again, though.

Shadowheart wears Asheera's clothes all the time. Constantly. They are, of course, comically oversized on her.

They both use pet names for one another, but Asheera fancies herself a bit of a romantic so she likes to come up with melodramatic ones ("my Heart") while Shadowheart prefers "love" and "my love." Shadowheart also calls Asheera "my Lady paladin" a lot in the fics, but IDK if you consider that a pet name or not?

Shadowheart is undoubtedly far, far, far more introverted than Asheera. In fact, Asheera is pretty extroverted in general. The extrovert/introvert ship dynamic is my catnip, how could you tell?

So, the affection one I took to mean what they prefer. Shadowheart likes quality time and affirmations while Asheera likes acts of service and quality time. However, if you imagined it as what they do then their placements would be flipped.

Shadowheart confesses love first. Affection and attraction, that's technically Asheera.

Neither of them really panic about bugs. Asheera has a bad habit of killing the little creatures though, and she has serious thoughts about her own oaths when she does it.

Horse riding... Listen, all I'm saying is Asheera riding a horse with Shadowheart behind her? Yeah. But, like, if we're literally talking about driving a car then Shadowheart can drive but if anyone else offers to drive then she's going to take the opportunity to sit in the passenger seat, curate the music, and fall asleep.

Shadowheart knows how to cook because she's an adult, but she's just terrible at it. I'm sorry, she is a horrible cook to me. Her taste buds are all fucked up from decades of sampling/testing poisons, venoms, and paralytics as a Sharran. Asheera's not much better, she just knows that if Shadowheart cooks it'll be a disaster for everyone.

Shadowheart prefers discretion and Asheera loves giving her wife big, showy kisses for all to see. They have an understanding.

Despite the jealousy levels, Asheera is prone to overprotectiveness. After everything that Shadowheart went through in her life, after everything that Asheera saw in her memories and in the events of BG3, there's no way she doesn't immediately come to Shadowheart's defense at pretty much any perceived slight. Shadowheart finds it very sweet, but unnecessary. She can defend herself just fine. Doesn't mean she hates it though.

Shadowheart has the age on Asheera by a margin, and she spent decades in a Sharran cloister. Calling them "relationships" is probably a bit much to be fair, though. This doesn't mean Asheera is some naïve virgin! She's actually more experienced with long-term relationships than Shadowheart.

Levels

They're both extremely horny, especially for one another, but Shadowheart wins out on this one by sheer excitement to try out anything and everything that she thinks Asheera would want to try. Asheera isn't a prude by any stretch of the imagination.

Shadowheart is awkward in that "sheltered in a cult commune" kinda way. She says the wildest shit sometimes and expects people to just move on from it. Someone who quotes erotica with their friend in public is going to cause others to feel awkward. Asheera on the other hand? She makes things awkward by either being way too serious about a situation or cracking bad jokes about it; there is no in-between, and nobody is sure what to expect.

Asheera doesn't get jealous. Shadowheart is jealous of things that aren't really related to their relationship. I don't think either of them gets jealous over that sorta thing. Shadowheart just has to manage her feelings about family given that Asheera has one that loves her and she was able to experience a childhood and such. That triggers jealousy which Asheera finds normal and reasonable and completely understandable. It's one of those aspects of Shadowheart's specific trauma that isn't really something you "get over" and Asheera, while finding it hurtful and hard to deal with sometimes, relies on her training and oaths as a paladin to manage that specific hurdle in their relationship.

[salvations]

(   laura  harrier  .  cis  woman  .  she  +  her  )       —       blasting  mariella  by  leon  bridges,  khruangbin  down  main  street  we’ve  spotted  MARIELLA  PATTON  sporting  their  dark  red-wine  manicure.  the  thirty-one  year  old  VAMPIRE  who’s  been  in  town  for  a  month  often  can  be  seen  meticulously  curating  her  wardrobe,  plastering  on  a  sickly-sweet  smile  that  is  all  too  inauthentic,  skipping  out  on  her  shift  to idle around at home or  working  as  a/n  SECRETARY  at  PORTUM  ART  MUSEUM.  people  say  they  display  self-assured  and  haughty  traits,  but  we  rather  trust  their  vibes:  a  quiet,  unnerving  temper  simmering  beneath  honeyed  words  ;  arrogance  worn  as  obnoxiously  as  her expensive  designer  perfume  ;  braving  new  and  uncharted  territories  bordering  life  and  death

basics.

full name: victoria mariella patton

nickname: em, mari

age & date of birth: thirty-one & june 23rd, 1993

species: vampire (turned in the summer of 2024)

gender & pronouns: cis woman & she + her

orientation: biromantic, bisexual

occupation: secretary @ portum art museum

hometown: fort worth, texas

background.

tw: alcohol abuse, blood, murder

mariella’s life didn’t begin until she moved out of texas. what’s eighteen years compared to the next hundred she’s to spend walking the earth as an immortal bloodsucker? regardless of what everyone says, she’s more than the spoiled brat with the best silver spoons that grandpa’s shipping empire could buy. mariella patton would be a name worth remembering–she hungered for greatness. 

she struggled on her way into an ivy league (with a generous donation to her father’s alma mater), built a life for herself in los angeles (through her mother’s weekly allowances), and clawed her way up the corporate ladder at a prestigious investment firm (nepotism goes a long way).

but, she still got there, didn’t she? no matter how many times they’d tried to trip her up and despite how many looks she got solely by being in the room, mariella had made a name for herself that was entirely her own doing. it could have come easy, money and charm seemed the natural default, but she finally had something she built for the first time in her life.

maybe that’s why that made their betrayal that much worse. mariella had worked alongside them since the pair were nothing more than slop at the bottom of the food chain. every paycheque, every late-night project, every presentation–they had survived the storm together and then some. 

a bit of friendly competition was healthy, but there were unspoken lines that mariella knew better than to cross. not to them, apparently. they’d stolen an important contract, ripping the rug from mariella, and costing her a promotion she was promised. 

that particular night was blurry, one too many shots working through her system as she tried to drink the day away. the man from across the bar had appeared out of thin air, sharply dressed and alluring as ever. she complained about what they’d done until the last call and when he offered an opportunity to make her little problem disappear, she was just desperate enough to consider it. mariella had made a living on brokering shady deals–what was one more? 

she woke up in a daze. that much was expected after the night she had. the strange cravings, on the other hand? it was unlike anything she had felt before. nothing would satisfy mariella until she found herself at their door. 

the events that followed had been difficult to remember. all she wanted was to quiet the hunger. it hadn’t been nearly enough.

she returned to work, disheveled and disoriented, but feigning normalcy. their roommate came home to their body. “a horrific crime scene akin to an animal attack,” the reports said. 

all she had to do was lay low, but her appetite was insatiable. mariella had cornered her boss at the parking garage. authorities found the body pale and lifeless in the car, drained of every drop.

a week followed and she could sense them closing in on her. investigators were scouring the security tapes for a suspect and the figure that trailed her boss fit mariella's description far too well. she considered finding the man that did this to her, but what good would that monster do? she should have stayed away in the first place.

eventually, she packed up what she could and left los angeles. she drove for miles, stopping at seedy motels and pit stops, towards texas. the hunger was deafening now.

as she neared her hometown, a part of her hesitated. what did she have there after all those years? no, they could do nothing to sate her hunger even now. mariella found a taste for greatness and it would not be found in fort worth with her tail tucked between her legs. 

she drove on and stumbled upon portum in the process. though she hasn’t been there long, she hopes to find some answers about her new nature. it’s been quite the adjustment, a far cry from skyscrapers and stalled traffic lanes, but not an entirely terrible place to spend walking the earth as an immortal bloodsucker.

fun facts.

while some vampires have lost their appetite for human food, mariella still maintains a lingering craving for it–particularly caffeine. it changes as the days go on, but she likes to keep it close as a means to hold on to her old life and humanity. still, she ignores that the taste grows bitter with each passing day—that her appetite hungers for something else. 

doesn’t have a noticeable southern accent. she might be from texas, but she’s shed that part of her life a long time ago.

mariella is pristine and hates to see a thing out of place, but covering up her tracks is not a strong suit. where she goes, a body count will follow. too bad she still hasn’t learned to clean up after herself.

hates her job (who doesn’t?) and will not show up to work lol she is not built for menial labour.

[sleepymccoy]

Fuck it, Ive found myself googling topics to start a fight again cos I'm trying to write spones, so I'm creating a list for myself here. If you have suggestions please feel free to add them. You are also welcome to use this as a prompt, although I don't know if it'll really help

These are mostly nicked from other lists, so hey may need tweaking to be more star trek sci fi in vibe. But I think they suit the sort of fights they have. Entertainingly, many of the questions on these lists have already been addressed my star trek. Like, I'm not going to go into eugenics here. They have a whole arc in tos where everyone expresses their opinions on eugenics (against) (the Khan stuff). So like, those aren't included! Or questions about ubi, trek world is a successful communist, they're all pro ubi.

Anyway. I've tried to hash it down to topics where I can easily see either how they disagree, or I can see how they agree but for different reasons. And, as this is for me, I might even include some of those details too!

Is technology making us more or less connected?

Could argue either way. McCoy's only contact with his kid is via tech, so he could be in favour. Same with Spock, but I think vulcans have a lot of physical cultural stuff that form part of gathering that (American) humans don't as much. Like, incense and how the planet is a different temp to the ship. So, maybe Spock is really feeling how tech is a shadow of the real thing more.

OR

McCoy hates and is unimpresssed by tech, and just wants to be home. Spock is perfectly happy with the perfunctory contact w his parents.

Is censorship ever acceptable in art and media?

This one is fun cos you can world build a bit with the premise. What's the art and media? I think McCoy has one of those inspected opinions, he's against censorship until you start listing terrible things then he gets annoyed cos he kind of agrees with a little bit of censorship. He doesn't think dead bodies should be shown on billboards across from schools. But he says, when asked, that he's against any censorship.

I think Vulcan has censored pre reform stuff from society quite a lot. And Spock's opinion on this is a real character choice you can make, does he agree people should only find out about history in university when you're spoon fed it kindly enough? Or does he think everyone should know?

Should we prioritize space exploration or focus on fixing problems on Earth?

This one is hilarious to me, cos they both work exploring space. But I think McCoy could get worked up over the focus and energy being on new space stuff if they're leaving hungry children behind, you know. I think Spock leans bigger picture

Is traditional marriage still relevant in modern society?

Ha! Have a great time! They'll be so off topic within a minute and just discussing their personal life that their opinion doesn't bloody matter

Is privacy more important than national security?

I think Spock is more into privacy then McCoy. Can't put my finger on why, I might come back to this

How can a good diet be used to control certain diseases?

I think the groundwork of this argument is that McCoy is having a go at Spock being vegetarian. So they're discussing broadly, but McCoy keeps slipping in how great meat is lol

Is it better to live in a big city or a small town?

Spock likes cities! McCoy likes small towns! This can devolve into a squabble about feudalism if you want to go crazy

Animal zoos: are they morally acceptable?

This is good worldbuilding too, zoos would be more rehab centres now. But Spock likes to have a go at old earth practices too just to see McCoy go red

Is online learning as effective as traditional in-person learning?

I reckon Spock likes online learning. The little freak

Is online dating more effective than traditional dating?

Heheheheheheh make them fight about dating. Make them list their favourite types of dates in an aggressive way. Heheheh

[oceangirl24]

20 Questions for Writers

Thanks @mrsmungus for the tag. ❤️

❣️How many works do you have on AO3?

13 total, including three fanart art gifts. The only writing I have is my current work. I'm bringing the old FFN stories over on another account.

❣️What is your total AO3 word count?

834,995- 1 million before the year's end would be nice.

❣️What fandoms do you write for?

So far only Boy Meets World. The fanart gifts have been in other fandoms.

❣️What are your top five fics by kudos? Autumn in Philadelphia Trilogy- 243

Flashbacks- 109

Christmas to Last a Lifetime- 94

Not too shabby for such a massive series with an OC as a main character.

❣️Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Yes. Eventually.

Ever single comment is incredibly important to me and I don't always have the spoons to respond the way I want to. Rather than rush a response, I wait until I can give it my full attention. There are times, however, when certain comments appear to go answered for months. Those are comments from people I am in touch with privately and have already thanked. I will respond to those in time as well.

❣️What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

The Darkest Night without question.

❣️What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

At this point, probably Christmas to Last a Lifetime.

❣️Do you get hate on your fic?

Is having someone throw a tantrum in your comments hate?

The writer who did this was upset over how the first part of AiP ended because they did not read the tags or summary. They also complained about my OC being better than theirs and whined about liking Audrey more as though at 11 years old I created with Aud malicious intent to hurt them 20+ years later. 🙄

This was the person who also tried to push me out of the fandom, harassed me, and stole my work.

So, hate, no. Immature, entitled behavior, yes.

❣️Do you write smut?

No it's not my thing to read or write. My story is canon compliant and I'm staying true to the content of the show as well. Since it's a 90s kids' sitcom, situations were only dealt with to a certain degree.

❣️Do you write crossovers?

Technically. lol The AiP trilogy is a crossover with BMW and its sequel show, Girl Meets World, but since it's in the same universe I don't count it.

I am in the works of doing a real crossover that I'm really excited about, hopefully soon.

❣️Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Yes. See the hate on fics response.

I debated how much to say since my socials are still being monitored but you know what, I don't care.

This person stole big chunks of my work from three of my stories and readers have noticed. That's how I became aware of it. Two readers brought it to my attention and just recently another mentioned it also.

I've dealt with it thanks to my dear friends who have had my back through this year + long ordeal.

And ngl, it was satisfying to see her panic and meltdown when the report was submitted and rush her ending. The subsequent attempts to cover her tracks have been popcorn worthy as they have been both comical and pathetic.

Anyone who knows me will tell you I'm too nice and give too much benefit of the doubt which is why no one outside of my friends' circle has seen the massive report on the theft and harrassment.

However, should you dear [REDACTED] try it again, I'm holding onto that report and won't be so nice the second time around. It won't be your friend who's been asking for the link since December 8th that I'll give it to either.

❣️Have you ever had a fic translated?

Not to my knowledge.

❣️Have you ever co-written a fic?

Not yet!!! But soon and I'm so excited.

❣️What's your all-time favorite ship?

As for canon ship, they change all the time, but currently it's

❣️What's the WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

At this point it's looking like Birthday Wishes. lol I mean, I have it outlined to the end and the next chapter is almost ready to go, but I'm prioritizing Saudade and have little time for BW, unfortunately.

❣️What are your writing strengths?

I'm not sure. May be characterization? Possibly world building and character development.

❣️What are your writing weaknesses?

Conciseness. lol Also SPAG editing. My brain skips words like crazy when writing and even editing. No matter how many times I go over things, I miss so much.

❣️Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

I avoid this personally because I know enough that I'd mess it up. And I only know Swedish which isn't really a language that figures into my work naturally.

As for fics I'm not writing, it really depends on how it's done.

❣️First fandom you wrote for?

Boy Meets World. First published was Labyrinth.

❣️Favorite fic you've ever written?

Ah, how to chose. Autumn in Philadelphia trilogy. I can't get anymore specific than that. lol

No pressure tags to play for: @axolotlsupremacyowo @tsunderesalty @amberlide @winterlovesong1 @justanotherpersonwhowrites @obscureobsidiandraws @stealing-your-kittens @bees-and-sunshine @ligercat

If anyone would like to be included in the tags, please let me know and I'll be sure to get you next time.

[hayffiebird]

Taste of Strawberries, chap. 48

Hayffie Post-Mockingjay (Canon divergence) Multi-chapter, Rated M SUMMARY: Four years have passed since the end of the war when Effie becomes a fixture in Haymitch’s life once again. An old friendship is rekindled. Will it lead to something more? Meanwhile, Panem has entered a new era. The rebellion’s over, the borders are open but in the shadows, anger and mistrust are smoldering. Something which will affect Haymitch and Effie’s life in a way they never saw coming. READ MORE

Chapter 48, Kettles and fruitcake

The playful September breeze lifted the yellow leaves off the street. Made them whirl. Dance, across from Effie’s window.

One of them, dry and withered, landed in the middle of the pond.

“Haymitch’s pond” as she’d come to call it, ever since that fateful night when he made his wish. His two wishes.

The leaf made rings on the surface. A ship fit for a beetle. Or maybe a family of fleas, sailing for the promised land.

The mid-morning sun filled every corner of the living room. Basking in its light, Effie set a plate of finger sandwiches on the coffee table. Found herself humming along with the radio.

It was a relatively new station. A group of ladies and gems who played music, mainly nursery rhymes, certain hours of the day.

They weren’t the first in that field, but they were the first to play more than just Capitol songs, approved by President Snow.

It’d been quite the project. A two years-long enterprise – supervised by someone other than Plutarch for a change – where they’d set out to collect folksongs and melodies from all around the nation.

Out in the districts of course, but also by digging in Capitol archives and through the mouths of the aging generation who still remembered the songs of old.

They had broadcasted throughout Panem for a couple of months now. For anyone who owned a radio and a curious mind.

Could’ve turned out tacky, only it didn’t. Caused something of a controversy, sure. A few Capitol stuck ups who wanted the show shut down, both before and after it first aired.

But those negative voices were soon drowned out, as the station grew increasingly popular. Here of course, and in District 4 and – out of all places – District 13.

No surprise there really. Not to Effie. Finnick’s district had always been a home for singing. And the latter: just starved for entertainment and fun after all those years in isolation.

If I replace Haymitch’s demolished radio,she thought, he might enjoy listening as well. Anything is possible. He’s such a music lover at heart. Could easily find these melodies on the piano. Play the twins something live.

Hands on her hips, Effie eyed the table critically – set with her finest bone china.

Plump, elegant coffee cups. Matching plates with gilded rims. All decorated with the same hand-painted flowers as the pot out in the kitchen, waiting to be filled.

“My family heirloom”, she could’ve told Haymitch. A wedding gift that once belonged to her grandparents.

Over the course of the years, the pretty coffee set had survived two rebellions, four toddlers (back to back) and one drunken Abernathy.

“What do you think?” Effie asked. “Will this do?”

Harnessed up, safely secured in their doorways, Amy and Ian bounced in response. Like the world’s tiniest skydivers. Dressed for play. Their toes just touching the floor.

Jolly jumpers, Annabel called them. It was a birthday gift from her and June.

What better way to dance with the beat, while you were still figuring out the art of standing?

“We should’ve gotten some fresh flowers”, Effie thought out loud. “Pity.”

She hummed along with the music. Adjusted one of the spoons. The linen napkins.

“Here your dreams are sweet and tomorrow brings them true”, she sang. “Here is the place where I love you.” She kissed Amy. “And you”, she smiled and kissed Ian. “Yes”, she nodded to herself. “I am not in the least tone deaf. Your father doesn’t know what he’s talking about.”

The boy grasped for the flowing skirt of her dress. A creation layered with autumn leaves in shades of orange, yellow and red. Not real ones but real enough. She hardly ever indulged in such fancy fashion anymore – fancy and toddlers didn’t go well in hand – but sometimes she just couldn’t help herself.

Low rumbles of a car engine broke her thoughts. Effie looked up. Just in time to see the cab roll up to her curb. The sky turned the side windows into mirrors and no sooner had the driver slowed to a stop before the doors opened.

One, two three.

The sight, their tell-tale chatter, high heels against gravel, curved Effie’s lips.

Moments later, the front door gave a merry tinkle.

“Who can that be?” Effie smiled the twins’s way.

“We’re here!” Venia thrilled, out in the hallway – seconds before they all burst into the living room. A carnival of big smiles and colors.

Orange, green and aqua taking the lead.

“Look who it is!” Flavius spread his arms out, like a circus director. “Your favorite uncle!”

The twins bounced like mad in their jolly jumpers. Like popcorn in a saucepan. Kicking their arms and legs, they both let out ecstatic little squeak-breaths at the sight of the three.

“Aaw! You’ve missed us terribly, haven’t you? Sweet darlings!” Venia bounded straight for Amy. The sunlight glinted off her gold tattoos when she smiled. “Hi, precious! Are you training for your bungee jump certificate, today?”

“How was breakfast?” Flavius smiled, over by the boy’s side. “What did you eat, young master Ian? Anything good?”

“Oh, look at you! You match the flowers, dear!” Octavia kissed Effie on the cheeks, holding a bouquet of bountiful blooms. “This is for you”, she beamed. “It was Venia’s idea. To take the route through Heaven’s Square. Flavius loves tiger lilies you see, and I simply adore sunflowers. We couldn’t decide on one, so we got you both!”

“Why, thank you.” Effie gave the bouquet a tentative sniff. “They’re gorgeous.”

Octavia nodded eagerly.

“We are such thoughtful friends, aren’t we?” she said, half overcome with emotion. “Oh, what would you do without us?”

Effie smiled. She gestured toward the coffee table.

“Please, help yourself while I get some water for these.”

“I’m glad we didn’t miss the concert”, Flavius beamed. He’d taken a seat on the rug, across from the boy while Ian bounced, bounced, bounced with the music. More or less in-sync. “Oh”, the man giggled next, pointing a well-manicured finger in the air. “I remember this one! An all-time favorite! We played it by my crib day and night!”

He cleared his throat behind a fist, opened his mouth and sang – in a fair and surprisingly beautiful voice:

“The people on the bus go up and down. Up and down. Up and down. The people on the bus go up and down. Throough the Capitoool!”

It was hilarious how fast the prep team had warmed up to the twins.

During that surprise first visit post-elevator, Octavia brought lidded mugs of hot chocolate and her two friends along.

And, kid you not, it took less than an hour. Not only did they melt like popsicles in August. They seemed to have forgotten they ever even had a negative opinion to begin with. Not about “borderless lovers” and certainly not “half breeds”.

The twins won them over in no time at all.

Cinna would have been proud. Katniss and Peeta too.

Since then, the three Capitolians checked in every other day or so. Brought food and iced tea, laughter and stories from town.

A welcome distraction. Their presence, their bright and sunny positivity couldn’t help but rub off. Lift her spirit for the first time in … she didn’t even know when.

Everything just fell into place. No need to sit down and talk things through. And frankly: it was a relief.

To just leave the past in the past. Look ahead.

“Are those Peeta’s work?” gasped Octavia, brown eyes on the table. The three-tier cookie stand. “I recognize the frosting!”

“It is.” Effie set the vase of flowers in the center of the cloth. “He mailed a crate full, the day before yesterday. Have one.”

Octavia smiled and plucked a sugar cookie, frosted with a bright green four-leaf clover. She had herself a small bite. Groaned.

“It’s divine! Venia, you have to try this!”

“How is our precious painter?” the older woman asked, once nibbling on a cookie of her own. “And Katniss too, the sweet dear. Is she still designing women’s fashion? We’ve been dying to visit, but life’s been so hectic. Something always comes up. Like just the other day!”

“Yes”, Octavia said. Voice low, almost conspiratory. “We finally told her. Not, not Katniss of course. Gloria. We put a foot down and kept it down. Didn’t we, Flavius?”

“Oh yes”, the man said, still on the floor, nodding his orange corkscrew curls.

“We explained how much we love you and Amy and Ian”, Venia said. “And Haymitch too of course. In his … best moments. We simply laid down the law and told her if she didn’t have anything nice to say, she shouldn't speak at all. Or else, she cannot get her nails done at our salon.”

“She was livid”, Octavia whispered. “She pushed over a mannequin. And then she said … tell her what she said!”

Venia mimicked her voice:

“‘I don’t need you, do I? Go to hell, for all I care! You’re crap at your job anyway!’”

”Ha!” Flavius laughed, as if the very thought was too ridiculous to ever be taken to heart. “Honestly, I feel sorry for her. Don’t you? I mean, think about it! Her nails will look absolutely dreadful from now on.”

“Why don’t we all take a seat?” Effie gestured toward the table. “The coffee will be ready any minute now.”

“Oh, that reminds me.” Flavius got to his feet, a real spring in his step. “You know, Effie, we were thinking. Since there is something of a breath of fall in the air today. How about, we celebrate? By brewing ourselves a pot of nice, hot tea.”

Effie’s heart sank.

And not just to her stomach. Down down down it went. All the way down to the very soles of her feet.

It must have shown, for Octavia quickly reassured her:

“Not that we don’t appreciate your coffee making skills. We simply adore it!”

“Absolutely”, said Venia. “Especially your con panna. It’s to die for!”

“I don’t really drink tea anymore”, said Effie, heat rising to her cheeks by their curious gazes. “It’s just not for me.”

“But why?” asked Octavia. “You had it during the Games. Plenty of times.”

“It’s complicated”, Effie said, hoping they’d leave it at that. “I had a bad experience with tea a while back. Lost my taste for it.”

“Oh!” said Flavius, hand against his heart. “I know exactly what you mean, love! I once indulged myself at a Pick & Cheese. A fine restaurant, they said. Trustworthy. What a joke!” He drew a heavy sigh, eyes on the ceiling. “I wound up”, he said, “with the worst food poisoning of my entire life! Shooting out both ends, if you know what I mean? God, I thought I was DYING! For years to come I couldn’t even look at a slice of gouda without feeling queasy.”

He patted Effie’s shoulder. Hand heavy with sympathy.

“You just have to tell yourself the same thing I did last year, that one time I fell off a carousel horse. ‘Flavius’, I said. ‘Now is the time for courage. Don’t let fear creep into your heart. If you do, you won’t ever try anything daring ever again. Dust yourself off and get right back in the saddle. Don’t worry. It will all be OK in the end.’”

“It’s not quite that simple”, Effie said. “Besides, I don’t even have any tea.”

“That’s alright!” Octavia beamed. She darted for her bag, bringing with her a fancy box of organic, flavored green tea. “We bought it downtown”, she said. “Just to be safe. Some people’s teas are simply awful! Even the best of people. But this, this is what Cinna and Portia always drank. Remember? Very tasty and it boosts the immune system.”

“Let’s get the kettle on!” sing-songed Flavius and Venia in chorus and before Effie knew it, the three of them bounded into the kitchen.

Ten minutes later they all returned. Carrying her plump china pot, heavy with something other than coffee for the first time in ages.

“Now don’t you worry, love”, Flavius interjected her weak protests. “We will cure this unfortunate mental block of yours in a heartbeat!”

They ushered her toward the couch. Planted her on the middle seat with Flavius and Venia on her left. Octavia on the right.

“Don’t be scared”, the latter smiled. “We are here for you.”

“No need for thanks either.” Venia patted her hand. “Just relax and let us provide with some much-needed tea therapy.”

“You know, this is something we could have charged you for”, said Flavius lightly, armed with the tea pot. “But of course - since it’s you – it’s on the house.” A steady stream, the color of fall itself, poured into her cup when he tilted the pot.

“How about a nip of milk?” Venia lifted the cream pitcher. “For extra flavor.”

“And one of sweet Peeta’s sweet creations to nibble on in between”, said Octavia and placed a pink-frosted cookie on her plate. She lifted the cup off the table. “There you go”, she said sweetly. “Nice and hot.”

Effie had no choice but to accept.

Holding it by the ear, she stirred with the silver spoon. Buying herself more time. The scent swirled into her nostrils. This tea – Cinna and Portia’s tea – smelled nothing like her last time, but the lump still grew in her throat.

Her eyes flitted to the twins, bouncing in their jolly jumpers. As if making sure they hadn’t disappeared in a puff of smoke.

Octavia saw her look.

“Yes, there’s Amy and there’s Ian.” Despite the aching in Effie’s chest, the softness of the woman’s voice coaxed a smile out of her. Octavia gave the children a flickering wave of her fingers. “Hello little dears! Look at your mama. So brave.”

Effie focused back on the tea. Drew a deep breath. Let the air out slowly. She lifted the cup to her mouth. Misty heat warmed her upper lip as she took the tiniest of sips.

As the beverage touched her tongue, flavor spreading across her taste buds, Mrs Q – relentless, tight-lipped, eyes hard as the gemstones in her hollow cheeks – flashed before her mind.

“You should never have let him into your bed.”

A choked sound came over Effie’s lips and, unable to stop them, tears welled up in her eyes.

“Oh, honey!” Venia gasped.

“Don’t cry!” said Octavia and in an instant, they hugged her from all sides. Three sets of arms, cocooning her in their embrace.

“It’s OK.” Flavius gingerly removed the cup from her hands. Set it on the table. “It’s only tea. Just tea. It won’t hurt you.” Patting her hair ever so softly, he said: “Don’t you worry, darling. We’ll bring you a different flavor every single visit and the more you drink it, the easier it’ll become.”

“Absolutely”, Venia said.

“We will help you. We promise”, said Octavia, cheek against her cheek. “That’s what friends do. How about, we braid your hair now? Would you like that, sweetie? Let’s braid your hair.”

“Mama.”

The sudden sound turned every head. Effie’s. The prep’s. Four pair of eyes glued to the same spot.

Amy waved her little arms about.

“Mama!” she repeated. Firmer now.

“Oh my God”, whispered Octavia.

“Did she just …?” Venia stared, arms still around Effie.

“Was that her first word?” Flavius asked under his breath.

“Yes”, Effie said, just as stunned. “I mean, they’ve strung together different vowels and consonants. Tried them out, for some time now, but … this is the first real word.”

“Oh, my God!!”

The prep team jumped from the couch, as one. Octavia heading for Amy. Venia and Flavius for Ian.

“That was so beautiful!” Octavia had already broken into sobs. “Can I hold her? Oh, please, can I?”

“Go ahead”, said Effie.

Ever so gently, the girl lifted Amy out of her sling. Tears rolled down her emerald-green cheeks as she cradles her close.

“Oh, precious, I’m so proud of you”, she sobbed, rocking her. “Goodness, that’s the most amazing thing I’ve seen since Venia’s last birthday!”

“Can you say ‘Flavius’, young master Ian? ‘Flaavius’!”

“Come, angel.” Venia smiled and lifted the boy out. Propped him against one hip, so naturally you’d think she’d done nothing else all her life. “Let’s get you to mama.”

The two women resumed their seats around Effie. And Amy, she immediately climbed onto her mother’s lap, like: “enough’s enough”.

Octavia just couldn’t stop smiling. Caressing the girl’s silky hair with the back of her fingers she said,

“We must take them to the Aquarium soon. Celebrate! Jellyfish are such magical creatures. Do you think the twins will find them magical?”

Riing!

Effie nearly jumped at the unexpected sound.

“Oh, allow me”, said Flavius, the only one still on his feet. And before Effie could stop him, he snatched the cordless telephone.

“Hello!” he thrilled. “Trinket residence!”

“Oh, um”, Effie said. You’d think she sat on an ant hill, by the way she moved. “Please Venia, can you scooch over?”

“Haymitch Abernathy! As I live and breathe!” Flavius exclaimed. “My, my, do I have news!”

“Flavius, hold on.” Effie struggled past Venia, and Ian sitting on her lap. All whilst Amy kept a firm hold on her mama’s body, dress, hair. “Please, the call’s for me. I’ll take that …”

“Your daughter”, the man nearly bounced on his feet, deaf to her words, “just said her first word! She said ‘mama’! Loud and clear! Oh, it was so incredible! Extraordinary! I could’ve kicked myself I didn’t bring a camera!”

“Flavius, let me talk to him.”

“Well, old man”, Flavius went on, “it was so good hearing from you again but as you probably guessed, we’re a little bit busy at the moment. Octavia and Venia and Effie and I – and the little ones of course! – are just about to have ourselves a green tea o’clock. Don’t mind if we call you back? OK, then. Take care. Bye!”

And before Effie could stop him, he ended the call.

xXx

*ring ring*

…

Hello? Haymitch? Are you there?

My stars. Good ol’ Effs Trinket. To what do I owe the pleasure?

I’m sorry. I wanted to get back to you sooner. But we had something of a full house before and then I needed to get the twins down for their nap. Took longer than expected.

You didn’t have to call at all.

No, of course I do! I wanted to. I’m so glad you rang us up. Flavius just beat me to it. Sorry about that. He gets a little over-excited sometimes. You know how he is.

*scoffs*

So … how is everything in District 12? Are you still living at Sae’s?

What’s it to you?

Um, nothing … I guess. It was just a question.

Well, use your imagination. How do you think it’s been?

Fair enough.

Sorry I missed the party. From what I hear, it was quite the talk of the town.

Oh, no. Not a party. Far from it. And we only had tea.

Yeah, well. Must be marvelous to have such all-weather friends. You’re one lucky girl, aren’t you?

… what?

I mean, who am I to judge? If you wanna hang out with the people who threw you under the bus a minute ago, that’s on you. I mean, fuck, knock yourself out. But as the father, one would think I deserve to at least be consulted about what kind of people you expose our children to.

Expose?

You heard me. I may be a drunk but I’m not that drunk. Did you honestly think I’d let you get away with it? That I’d sit here quietly? I know all about your fucked up city’s fucked up ideas! Plastic surgery. Neurotoxins. Puking your guts on purpose! And now those … those … “friends” of yours are gonna pollute my children’s young minds with all that Capitol horseshit? Over my dead body!

They don’t! Not at all! What kind of a mother do you think I am?

Well, you welcomed them back with open arms, didn’t you? I bet they never even apologized for the way they treated you. They ganged up with Gloria for fuck’s sake! Remember? I certainly do. I mean, hell Effs! Where’s your self-respect?

It’s different now.

How? What changed? How do you know it isn’t just some ploy to get an inside scoop? Gossip material for later. Extra, extra, hear all about it!

Stop it! They wouldn’t! They’d never! They’ve been nothing but good to me …

For a precious few weeks …

… and the twins! I chose to forgive. To let bygones be bygones and trust my own heart in this matter. And that should be enough for you too! If you ever knew me at all …

*snorts* Well, don’t come weeping on my doorstep when they discard you. And trust me, sweetheart. They will.

Oh, don’t you worry! And don’t call me sweetheart! I can take care of myself, thank you very much! *inhales a shaky breath* You’re mad about earlier. And I get that but … you don’t have to be mean. I know the prep team far better than you do and you … you wouldn’t even be saying those things, had you seen them today. They adore the twins.

Yeah, they love ‘em. Same way Octavia loves her pet rats. Amy and Ian are little more than dolls to them. The moment something else piques their interest, they’ll toss them aside without a second thought.

Who are you?! You sound just like Gloria!

I d…

Yes, you do! You’re being vicious and prejudiced when you don’t even have a clue! Nothing improper goes on under my roof and I cannot believe you think I’d even allow it! The only thing the prep team’s done is bring happiness back into this house. They make me laugh. Make me feel … hopeful. They even promised to help with my tea anxiety.

Your … what?

I … I mean. They make things better, OK. Easier. Whenever I need help with the children or just need a few minutes for myself to breathe or take a shower, they’re always there. They help me, Haymitch!

Yah, unlike me.

I didn’t say …

Cause last time I checked, princess, you already have a support system. Right here! You didn’t have to break the family up.

I didn’t!

You fucking did, Effs! I didn’t up and leave! Not once! Not even when you dropped your twin pregnancy on me like a fucking nuclear bomb. I always remained loyal to you. To our family. No matter what! You’re the one who saw fit to pack your bags. Who decided to put a whole fucking country between us!

Because you left me no choice! What else could I do?

Like … not leave! Get a place nearby.

Right. And when you come stumbling through the door at night, wasted out of your mind, what then?

Fuck you! I offered to go! Offered my whole goddamn house on a silver platter! I would’ve been fine stayin’ at your fancy-ass place. If it meant that you and the …

No, you wouldn’t! You wouldn’t be fine at all! I wanted to come home! More than anything! But you in the Capitol? Alone with your ghosts and no one checking up on you. You’d drink yourself to death for sure!

I don’t need a fucking babysitter!

Since when?! I can’t be in charge of everything, Haymitch! The twins already claim me day and night. I can’t be in charge of everything all the time! It’s too much!

Well, if things are so taxing for you, then come the fuck home! Your village isn’t the prep team, you hear! It’s Sae. It’s Hazelle. Katniss. Peeta. Fine, I’m just some big and scary monster, so to hell with me, right? But those people, they love you! They care for you deeply and every single one of them is a far better influence than your trio of …

Don’t you dare say it!

Well, they’re nutty as a fruitcake, on that we can all agree!

Better nutty than callous! Callous and unkind! At least they are here! Part of their lives. There’s nothing wrong with that! All they do is read stories to them, sing a song every once in a while, put on puppet shows …

Yeah? ‘bout what? The history of the Hunger Games?

Go to hell, Haymitch! I haven’t heard from you in a month. More than a month! Don’t you think I wanted to tell you about the prep team? Or anything concerning the twins, for that matter? But how can I, when you never pick up the phone? When you refuse to return my calls. It’s been weeks and weeks of worrying and caring for the children without you and now, here you are, after all this time, intoxicated …

Oh, that is so you! Effie Trinket in a nutshell! Yeah, maybe I did have a snifter or two, just to take the edge off things. Of course you’ll hold it over my head forever! Never mind I missed my daughter’s first word. Never mind you took my own flesh and blood away from me! Little Ms. Perfect Mama of the Year … Go, then. Go on! Have a ball with your nutty little friends. You already ruined everything else and if you’re too dense to realize they’re not good for you, then …

You ever stopped to think that maybe you’re the one who’s not good for me?!

So file for sole custody then! Be done with it!! *SLAM!*

*toot toot*

[archaeren]

Hi Ren,

it's lavenderlight over from ao3!

I'm crossing my fingers that the infamous tumblr-ask-box-situation won't swallow my message! xD

I hope I'm not overstepping (and I don't expect a reply) but I just thought I'd check in - I know you've got discord but I don't think I have the spoons currently to make an account lol

So, good old tumblr it is :D

Anyway - I wanted to wish you happy holidays and let you know that I've been thinking of you (and your depiction of Chui ( 〃▽〃) ) and that LC:LS meant quite a lot to me over the past year - and continues to mean a lot to me.

Honestly, I keep thinking (constantly!!) about all of the chapters so far, imagining how the story might unfold in the future -

So, yeah. I hope you're doing alright and I'll look forward to any possible updates!! <3

Wishing you nice company, a warm blanket and a hot drink of your choice for the holidays!!

OMG hello!! You're not overstepping at all, this is so sweet aaaaa!! <3 <3 <3 I don't know how to say that it means a lot to me that the story matters to you so much. I look forward to your comments on every chapter SO MUCH, they're so thorough and thoughtful, every one of them is like a little gift. I'm so curious what other kinds of things you find yourself thinking about the chapters so far and the ones that have yet to come! It really does mean a lot to know someone else is thinking about it so much. It's a rarepair--the number of English language authors including the migikisa ship at all (let alone focusing on it) can be counted on one hand!--in a tiny fandom. (Someone recently asked me about how many longfics were in the Eng JJ fandom and I was able to rattle off all their titles and author names... because there are only three of them, and one of them is mine. XD) In such a niche pairing, it's easy to feel lonely, especially as one of the sole creators for it. You can't help but wonder sometimes if other people think you're weird or even annoying for being so invested. It can feel isolating. So for someone to say it means that much to them... it's really validating. <3 I got a bit sidetracked lately by doing fanart instead of writing, which is most of why I haven't updated recently. The art brain has a stranglehold on the writing brain! (I started writing again on Friday so I could update on Sunday and then on Saturday I was gripped by the drive to draw Chui as a character from Cult of the Lamb and that consumed my entire weekend... oops.) Actually, you're the one that inspired that art shift. It was that comment you left on Chapter 14, where you mentioned reading a quote that said, “People hate their own art because it looks like they made it. They think if they get better, it will stop looking like they made it. A better person made it. But there’s no level of skill beyond which you stop being you. You hate the most valuable thing about your art.” I thought about that a lot after you said it and it really changed my perspective on my own art. I draw more now than I have in years, and I usually even like what I draw! Even though I can still see its flaws and still see my own influence on it, I've really made a lot of peace with that. It's been really eye-opening and empowering. I really want to get an LC:LS update out today or tomorrow because we're finally hitting the winter performance and the timeline of coinciding with IRL Christmas is just too good. I wish I could post one today and one tomorrow for the timing but I'm not sure I'll have time to finish them both and I'm not sure people would have time to read them anyway! I will probably content myself with one. XD Anyway, if you ever do decide to make a discord I would love to talk more! You can also just lurk in the server that's linked on LC:LS, though I feel like you would be a great addition to the culture c: Thank you so much again for messaging and I hope you have a wonderful holiday (with a few moments to spare for thinking Chui thoughts! I know I will be, hehe <3 )

[ghoulsbian]

001 with Mutsaura for the ask thing?

heavy breathing

you got it!! i'm happy to answer this!! i never get to talk about them except for with my friend allan (@holyhounddog, follow him! he makes amazing art.)

HERE WE GO!! mutsaura:

- when i started shipping it: i started shipping it back when the :re chapters were still coming out, specifically when mucchan and sanny started to team up. i immediately fell in love with the pairing. it very quickly replaced mutsurie as my favorite mutsuki pairing and has remained as my number one. there's something so spicy about them that just piques my interest. toxic yaoi to healthy yaoi (in the epilogue). DELICIOUS.

- my thoughts: probably in my top five tokyo ghoul ships. not exactly sure where but yeah. they have so much going for them- size difference, mutual understanding of each other, making each other worse, going from toxic to healthy, etc. they're both really hot. they also stayed close with each other after the events of the final arc too and that makes me sooo happy. they really grew together and found wellness together.

- what makes me happy about them: i think that shinsanpei could offer mutsuki some sort of safety that no one else could. sanny is a man who accepted all of mutsuki, all of his faults and flaws and errors. he wasn't someone mutsuki had to hide even a portion of himself from. sanny accepted him at his craziest and unhealthiest, though sanchan was pretty crazy and unhealthy himself, and stayed with him as he got better too. i think they could be true soulmates. maybe they had a period of time where they thought it was only their craziness that brought them together, but they realized it was so much more than that.

- what makes me sad about them: i think that during their healing processes, there was a LOT of unraveling of the poor ways in which they treated each other during their dual insanity. it was a very emotional period of time for the both of them. i think that mutsuki also had to learn to love in a new way that wasn't pure obsession. i think he offered himself in that way to sanny but sanny downright refused, and it made mutsuki lash out cuz he felt unloved, but he came to understand shinsanpei's reasoning for doing so.

(i'm skipping over the fanfic questions bc i don't really read fanfic at all anymore, whoops)

- who i'd be comfortable with them ending up with if not each other: for mutsuki, definitely urie. though, i don't really see anyone else for sanchan. i know people ship him with touma but i feel indifferent towards that.

- my happily ever after for them: they ultimately leave anything related to ghouls and travel the world together. they end up with a cat that they carry around in one of those pet backpacks as they travel too. they end up living somewhere by the ocean, by a beach. they live a calm and unassuming life, not forgetting the people they used to be but forgiving themselves for it. they send postcards to the old quinx members and the kaneki family periodically too. AAGGHH!!

- who is the big/little spoon: i think mutsuki would feel emasculated for a bit if sanny tried to be the big spoon for him. so mutsuki was the big spoon at all times for a while. but mutsuki eventually caved, tentatively allowing sanny to be the big spoon. they agreed that if mutsuki felt too uncomfortable they would stop immediately. mutsuki was very tense at first, but slowly relaxed into shinsanpei's arms. it felt very nice for him. he'd never allowed anyone to hold him like that. he can't get enough afterwards. nowadays sanchan is the usual big spoon.

- what is their favorite non-sexual activity: bathing and showering together. mutsuki was very averse to the bathtub for a long time, because of his childhood trauma. he got extremely triggered and broke down the first time they tried the bathtub together, so they kind of worked up to it more gradually after that. it's now a fun activity they like doing a lot.

hope these are good :3