#believing this helps with the anxiety that he thinks i was the villain and will probably continue on with this behaviour

[girlypopastro]

on my knees in relief since i realized pluto was in his 7h this whole time and is going to be leaving it soon. i can breathe easier knowing he might not have this mesmerizing destructive grip anymore. and that the long line of women hes hurt this way ends this march

[starillusion13]

Hi! can I request an ateez 9th member poly au but the scenario is they make her feel left out, being mean and entertains another girl from another grp and she was painted as the villain by that girl! so they gang up on her, she suddenly left the group and now they’re chasing her back!!

Missing Piece

Pairing: Ateez!ot8 x f!reader

Genre: Idol au, Angst, Mature

Warnings: ignorance, tired, mention of drugs( just a rumor), leaving the group, feeling left out, light arguments, anxiety, evil intentions(a pick me not y/n), a mess of emotions nothing more.

W.C: 6.9k

Note: please I want to thanks to people for reading and reblogging. Reviews are always appreciated. Spread love not hate. After writing this fic, I realized that I don't know how to write 9th member fics😔. I hope this what you wanted anon<3.

Network: @cultofdionysusnet @k-vanity

Now let’s take a moment to appreciate my dear friend @dreamsoffanfics Thanks for helping me out and being my proofreader. A dear friend indeed <3.

"Congratulations Ateez!"

Whenever this phrase echoed, you always felt proud and satisfied with yourself for coming a long way. It's obvious that your hard work and determination made it possible for you to stand strong and shine on this ground.

But, a wave of emotions was running inside you today because of the feelings that are itching your mind.

The scandals you are in lately.

The staff and other idols who are passing by while making your way towards the private room are constantly congratulating you and the members of your group. They all are having a wide smile across their faces but you just hesitantly smiled towards others. You know very well that everyone is aware of the scandal you are currently dealing with.

You excuse yourself from the washroom and Hongjoong notices you stepping away in another direction. He called out your name and asked where you were off to but you didn't reply or turned back.

All the members were gathered in front of their room to enter but when they saw their leader---the captain was standing in front of the door and looking in a particular direction. They all looked towards your fading figure into the hallway.

"Where is she going now?" San asked the captain but quickly noticed the anger on his face.

Hongjoong slammed open the door and others followed him inside the room, "I don't know. She didn't reply to me when I asked her. She is really becoming stubborn."

"What's her problem? Isn't she acting so childish all the time?" Mingi slumped down on a cushioned chair and closed his eyes when placing himself comfortably.

Jongho shook his head while removing the mic and earpiece from around his neck and placing it on the wide desk in front of the mirror. "What about the updates on her scandal? The way she is sneaking around here and there, I feel like believing those are not just scandals."

"No. I don't think that's possible. I don't see a sign from her taking any drugs." Seonghwa stated and looked at the leader who was leaning against the wall after removing all the unnecessary items from him. When he caught his eyes, the one standing sighed.

"But she didn't even deny it." Hongjoong said and raised a brow.

Yeosang nodded and spoke up, earning others attention to his words,"When the manager asked her to explain the matter she remained silent and was staring down as if she was high on drugs. Even when the company tried to answer the question about her on the internet, she refused to make a statement."

Some of them nodded and others had confusion visible on their faces.

Wooyoung pointed at your bag beside his and asked, "why did she bring this bag again?" He lifted the bag and found it to be the same bag which you're carrying everywhere, "it seems like she has a lot of stuff inside it."

"Open it." Hongjoong orders the younger one but he hesitated to the command. "I said open it. I am asking you for it and she has no say in this."

"But it's a girl's bag."

"Don't act like we don't stay together. Even if I ask her about bringing this bag, she won't reply. And if something inappropriate is there then we would apologize to her later."

The younger nodded but before he could open the bag. The manager entered. Hongjoong signaled to put the bag down.

It was always a bit challenging for you to be in a group where you are the only female member. All the fans accepted you very willingly and gave you lots of love on the day when it was announced you would be the last member of the debut line. Yeah, the competition had always included the five girls with the boys but you didn't expect back then to be in the lineup of the final showdown. As you were very sure of Minnie to be debuting with them. Her talents and looks are always remarkable and you admired her dance moves and vocals so much. And, you're sure others loved her more than you. They have a strong friendship with her even after her debuting in a different group 'Stray Kids'.

But your members never made you feel left out or different for being a girl. At first they were a bit hesitant to have you as the member but gradually you all became close and had so much fun together during the first MV shooting. Your debut was memorable with you all traveling to a different country and experiencing several new things.

Moreover, your members treated you like the baby of the group. They pampered you so much and of course, they won't leave a chance to annoy the shit out of you. You felt closer with Jongho because he was around your age so you were always paired up with him. And that's how the deep friendship started between you both.

Ateez are very close with Stray Kids and for that you all often meet them to dine out and hang out on off schedule days and after encore and promotion stages. You loved Minho's company a lot because you both clicked together perfectly. But there was something you noticed: San doesn't like you spending time with Stray Kids and sometimes, he and the others often drag you away with your members telling them that they need to hurry back to the dorm because something urgent came up. Only for you to get scolded later by Hongjoong that being so friendly with others would lead you to get into a lot of scandals.

What about them?

They often can be seen talking with Minnie after the performances or concerts and even two or three of them hanging out with her. Did you ever say anything? No. Then how come the dating rules only apply to you? You had enough one day and screamed at her and them, telling them that because of her Ateez would soon be under controversy but she quickly apologized to you and cried to them.

That was not the end. Because of her Hongjoong treated you really badly. He and other members used harsh words on you and others supported him on the fact that you had overreacted for no reason. They really started to go out alone without you - you were already used to it. But after the incident, they purposely made you feel left out. That didn't even stop them being friendly with her. They even did the new dance challenge with her and the way she was leaning on Seonghwa's arm made you glare at the video longer until the manager announced the practice time.

All these struggles really made you exhausted day by day and it's even showing in your performances and interaction with others. One afternoon, you were in the middle of the preparation for the comeback when you suddenly got to know about something trending under your name on all social media platforms.

'Is y/n really taking drugs?'

And the comments under the post - some supporting your side saying it's fake but you were shocked to see the amount of people believing the post and making strong comments that your recent appearances do look like you are under its effects. You ignored the news, you ignored everyone. You thought about the trainee days and then after debuting. You had lots of fun with Ateez. There are a lot of good memories and there are a lot more than just memories which couldn't be revealed everywhere. You tried to talk with others but never had the courage so you kept everything to yourself. Whenever you were asked to clarify on this matter, you remained silent.

One day, finally you had a talk session with your manager to discuss the ongoing situation. Many of your fans went against you and you accepted their opinions because you didn't make any strong denial statement on it so it's obvious for people to suspect you. You are being a bad influence on the industry.

"Are you sure about this?" the manager had concern and worry etched across her face but you just nodded and sighed when she kept staring at you.

"I don't want to change my mind. I have come up with this decision after thinking a lot."

She opened a file on her tablet before passing it to you to read, "read this. And, what about them? This is a big decision so please think carefully."

"I know."

"Will you be fine after this? People might blame you more."

"I don't have any other option. Even if I have, this is the only thing that seems right to me right now."

She just nodded in acceptance.

.

.

.

As the manager entered the room, she noticed Wooyoung placing your bag down to the side of the chair. Hongjoong stepped forward to greet her and she sent a quick smile to everyone present in the room, also noticing your absence there.

"You all don't have any more upcoming schedules this week so hurry up, we have to leave for the dorm. You guys look so tired. You all didn't got enough rest the last few days." She announced and stared at Hongjoong who seemed to want to ask her something.

"Do you want to say something?"

He nodded, "Y/n is not here since we came back from the stage. She went towards the stairs and I asked her but she seemed a bit lost. Where is she? Do you know about it?"

She sighed, "she is probably in the restroom, don't worry."

"Before the day of the comeback, she had a talk with you. What did she tell?" Seonghwa asked, who was now wearing a black t-shirt with just a washed face. He wasn't wearing his stage outfit anymore.

"You all will get to know about it tomorrow morning."

"What is it that you can't tell us now?" San asked her curiously.

She shook her head, "it's not like that. I can tell you but she doesn't want me to tell you. Don't get your hopes up. Just know it's nothing good." She handed over the food bag to them so that they could feed themselves inside the van while going back home. She asked the last two members to quickly change into a comfortable outfit and took your outfit to the restroom.

.

.

As soon as she handed you the outfit, you thanked her and asked her to wait outside. Changing into the comfortable soft fabrics made you sigh in relief. But you felt tears welling up in your eyes while staring down at the mic, earpiece and the stage outfit in your hand. A lot of emotions coursing through you but your mind was only focusing on the fact - this was your last stage performance.

You wiped your tears and put on a fake smile before exiting the door. the manager took the things from your hands but before you could step forward, she grabbed your wrist and looked at your face, scanning the smudged eyeshadow and liner. You were crying and she caressed your hand.

"Y/n, you are not okay with this. Please, I would suggest that you change your mind."

You shook your head before removing her hand. "Trust me. I will be okay without all of these problems." She watched your retreating figure until you took a sharp turn.

When you reached the door of the private room, it was expected to hear their loud laugh or them having weird singing competitions that could be heard from outside. But now, it's so quiet. Are they that tired? Or did they already leave for the dorm without you? That's not possible, the car was for you nine so it won't leave until nine of you have entered it.

You tightly held the handle before pushing the door open only to find them gathered around the couch but staring at you. You noticed Wooyoung holding a bag at the end of the couch.

A bag, wait, your bag. No!

You hurriedly went over to the couch to find it was your bag and the things were already scattered on it. You tried to pull the bag from his hold until Yeosang grabbed your wrist and turned you around.

"What is this?" he asked you in a demanding tone.

You licked your lips before prying his hand off from your wrist, "nothing. you don't have to know." You snatched the bag, "and why did you even touch my bag without my permission?"

"Since when are we asking each other to touch our things?" Yunho asked and got up from the chair to make his way towards you. You tried to pick up the things and place them inside the bag but Hongjoong blocked your hand and signaled Mingi to take the things away from you. The tall man finally stood in front of you, "and you better explain what all these boxes are for?"

"Nothing..."

Yunho exhaled sharply and grabbed your biceps tightly, "Y/n, what are you hiding from us? what is it that you can't tell us?"

Mingi was glancing between you and the things which he was putting inside the bag. Seonghwa stood beside the man holding you and stared at you sharply, "are these the drugs?"

"Please just shut up!" you screamed at them.

They slightly flinched at your sudden outburst but it was not noticeable by you as your teary eyes blurred your view. You put your palm over your ears and closed your eyes tightly.

"Please shut up. I can't hear any more of this. I know you don't trust me like before but please don't blame me every time. Because of me, this group is already under so much controversy and I'm really sorry for that."

You were going through a lot and having them all cornering you in the room, confined to a little space was too much.

San pushed Yunho so that he could hug your crying form, "It's okay, y/n. No one is blaming you. But why are there so many boxes containing various pills in your bag? You can tell me if those are distractions." he continuously rubbed your back.

You were crying in his hold, clutching his white t-shirt tightly. He didn't care that his fresh t-shirt was getting wet because of your tears when you were crying helplessly. It was breaking their heart to see you like this but what could they do. If you are doing something wrong then they must solve it and for that they need to talk to you but here you are not telling anything and always ignoring them since the incident happened between you and Minnie.

Realizing you were holding San tightly, you quickly removed his arms from around you and glared at him. Everyone observed your sudden change in mood and Hongjoong held your biceps to turn you towards him. At the tight hold you said harshly "let go of me."

"Y/n, enough. What's wrong with you suddenly?" His demanding tone was obvious and your glaring eyes didn't faze his expression. "Don't show me that look."

"Then leave me."

"Joong, leave her hand. We are all tired and we need to go to the dorm. We can ask her about this there." Seonghwa said calmly and placed his palm on the younger's shoulder. the latter sighed and you snatched your hand from him.

Everyone's eyes followed how disheveled you were looking while picking up your things and no one tried to stop you as you were all going to the same place after all. When you pulled the zip of your bag, Wooyoung stepped forward to offer you the food but you rejected it and went outside the room, slamming the door. They flinched at the loud noise but no one noticed your tears and emotions while exiting the private room backstage for the last time.

"I will be good without all of them." You have repeated this line to yourself a lot of times but still you felt the emotions to return back all over again.

Wiping your eyes, you raised your head only to find Minnie standing in front of you with folded hands and innocent eyes, the way she always looks at others. She was still wearing a faerie stage outfit and smiling at you. Ignoring her presence, you tried to turn around but her voice made you halt.

"Are you carrying those drugs in the bag again? So should I post it clearly that you are being spotted taking drugs?" she was smirking when you turned around.

"What are you saying?" You gripped the bag tightly when she glanced at it and chuckled. Stepping forward to you, her smirk grew wider, "it was me who posted that about you. and even if you say this to anyone, no one is going to believe you."

"It was...you." you watched her in disbelief when she lightly laughed and twirled a strand of hair between her delicate thin fingers. She pouted and blinked at you, "you shouted at me in front of them so I had to take my revenge."

"And it's just-"

"It hurts my pride." She made a disgusted face at you and bumped against your shoulder, "well, thank me for not doing something else but....I just ruined your career. Goodbye!"

You saw her walking like on a cat walk towards the corridor and smiling innocently to everyone in her way. She turned a little and smirked at you before taking a turn leaving you there in shock.

"Y/n...you're still here." You heard Jongho's voice and then saw others exiting the room but before they could ask you something, you ran towards the elevator and fortunately it just opened for the staff members queuing in front of it and you got inside with them. They were all glancing at you because of your weird behavior and you being alone with a sad look.

As soon as the ding sound indicated the arrival to the ground floor, you wasted no time and speedily walked towards the car. You got inside and sat in the far back, waiting for others to come.

.

.

After they got into the car, they found you sleeping peacefully at the back. "She is sleeping." Yunho told others and placed your head on his shoulder while adjusting in the seat beside you.

"Let her sleep. She is extremely tired." Hongjoong said and scolded Wooyoung who was about to say something loudly.

Seonghwa shook his head, "but she has to eat."

"I will feed her after we reach home. Leave her for a while. Let's not ask her anything more today." Yeosang started and closed his eyes while leaning back.

Yunho kept stroking your head so that you don't wake up and he felt you nuzzling into him and he smiled while looking down at you.

>>>><<<<

You stretched your arms, you heard their voices coming from a distance. You groaned and rubbed your eyes. Your body was aching so bad that you felt like going back to sleep again. But then you remembered your plans for this night.

You got up and stepped outside the room, their voices were coming from the living room and when some of them caught your sleepy figure entering the room they sent a smile towards you.

"Y/n come eat with me. Others have already had their dinner and I will accompany you while the rest keep doing whatever they do at the moment." Yeosang called you from the table and patted the chair beside him. You were hungry but you didn't feel like eating anything because of all the emotions you had inside.

Is my decision okay?

You shook off the feeling and walked towards the table. Some returned back to discuss the topic they were busy with and the youngest of the two joined you both at the table.

"So, as we don't have a schedule this week. How about we go on a trip somewhere?" Wooyoung suggested and Yeosang nodded before urging to start eating.

Your heart ached when you heard the joy in his voice and how they were planning for the week.

"But can we not spend time inside the dorm? I don't feel like going out." Jongho whined.

"What do you say, y/n?" Yeosang asked and you glanced at him to your side but remained silent.

He shared a glance with Wooyoung before the younger one spoke up: "Hey! Do you want to stay inside or go out? We will decide after what you say."

"I......whatever you all will agree on." You mumbled softly.

"But-"

"I said whatever you guys will agree on! It doesn't matter what I say. You all will be off on your own." You stood up from the table and took deep breaths, "have fun without me. Whatever you guys do, enjoy yourself and live a happy life."

"Y/n...if-"

"Yeo I don't want to hear anything. I'm going to sleep. Goodnight."

The moment you had to pass the couch where others were sitting but their attention was on you after you shouted at the table, Mingi grabbed your hand, "Are you okay?"

You glanced at the grip and to the others.

"You all are always meant for each other. The eight of you are soulmates and I'm just an extra character who acted as a villain in the group and destroyed your success with my scandal."

Hongjoong stood up, "Don't think like that. We can sort this out together."

"No. People already hate me for this and even if I try to claim myself innocent then all the fame I have already lost is never coming back. I'll still receive more hate. It wouldn't have happened if you guys really cared for me." You whispered the last line.

San scratched his neck and spoke up, "But you have us. Even if they hate you, we will show them that you are the best."

"But you don't have me. I can't do anything in return so it's better for me to move away from the scene so that you don't have a problem on your way to success. There's still a long way to go and I can't stop you all from that."

Seonghwa shook his head, "You are not stopping us. You keep us motivated, Y/n. You'll always be with us like the final missing piece of the puzzle."

"Sometimes there's an extra piece to distract you and confuse you and I'm that extra piece. You are already complete without me."

"Why are you thinking like this?" Mingi asked you softly.

"Because you all made me feel like this." You sighed and turned back but before stepping forward, you said loudly, "Just remember that even if I'm not with you all in this journey you all will move forward and achieve everything. You deserve a lot and on top of that, be happy. Don't let yourself fall apart because of a missing piece."

Your quick steps led you to your room and you fell on your bed. Cries getting muffled by the sheet and you pushed your face into it more. When you were saying those words earlier, you stood strong but deep down, your heart was heavy.

Time passed and you didn't realize when you fell asleep. A figure stepped inside your room, he smiled at your sleeping figure, his dimples peeking out even in the dark and his sharp eyes staring at you softly. He adjusted your body to a comfortable position and pulled you closer to him, lulling you to sleep. You mumbled something in your sleep and he smiled and patted your head. Soon, he fell asleep with you in his arms.

Now, this is the secret that nobody knows yet. You're dating all of them. Since the day of the debut you all found comfort in each other's arms. This can't be mentioned in the public media and nothing can be obvious if you are really dating one of them - let alone all of them. They're always so protective and showered you with love, making your heart warm and a wide smile visible on your face.

In many shows and interviews, you've referred to them as your strongest pillars of life and that you would be always thankful to them for being with you.

But lately it turned into a disaster after you all met her again after a year at the show when Minnie introduced herself to them and they became friends quickly. You didn't mind the friendship at first but when they started to blame you on whatever she tells them, they started pointing out her right proving you wrong in every aspect.

She really had to destroy your career---even your relationship with them.

<<<<<<>>>>>>

"You are here?" Yunho yawned while nodding his head and rubbed his eyes while making his way towards the table after greeting the leader. "I thought you're the one sleeping with her."

Yunho shook his head before gulping down the water, "No. San told me that he wanted to sleep with her." Hongjoong nodded and turned his attention back to the food on the table.

The rest of them soon started to gather around in the living room. Wooyoung saw San coming last into the wide space but all alone. He creased his brows and asked him, "Isn't she coming for breakfast?" He put down the plate on the table.

"It'll soon be lunch time." Jongho said and laughed. Yeah, it's true that they woke up so late that they have passed the morning and it's already noon but they're still preparing breakfast.

San, who was still rubbing his eyes, looked at him and then around the room, "She isn't here?"

"No..."

"When I woke up, she was not in the bed."

Hongjoong stood up and took the phone in his hand before watching everyone in confusion,

"Did she tell any of you where she is going today? Does she have something to do?"

He dialed your number but the line was dead.

Mingi skipped to your room to see if you had left any sticky note but nothing was there. Wait. Not even your things were there. Only a few items were there but the photo frames with a few boxes were missing too. He went back into the living room to inform the others about it. They were so lost and confused about the situation when suddenly the doorbell rang.

Jongho quickly opened it to be greeted by their manager whose appearance was more serious than usual. She walked inside and looked at everyone before sighing and sitting on the chair near her, "Have you checked your phones?"

When they shook their heads and told her that they had just woken up. She turned her phone screen around to take a look at it.

'Y/n, the member of Ateez is leaving the group...'

San snatched the phone from her hand and scrolled down the whole post only to find out the news was announced by their own company and there was also an apology letter from your side posted. So many things happened just in the morning.

"What is this? Where is she?" Hongjoong demanded a clarification of this situation from her but she only shook her head before brushing some strands of hair back.

"She has already left the place. These past few days, you were busy and didn't notice her preparing for this day so I was there to help her collect everything. I tried to change her decision, make her understand but she had already lost hope in this. She was so disturbed with the whole scandal and all."

"Can't we contact her?" Wooyoung asked her while tears were threatening to fall from his eyes.

"No. Your company has banned you from having any contact with a former member. I don't think it's good for your image."

"I don't care about my image. I want her back. How can she leave the group? And she didn't tell us anything about this the whole time..."

Seonghwa looked at the leader and sighed, "That's why she was saying things like that last night."

And now, they realized how they have ignored you all these past months just to believe that girl whom they had befriended and trusted so much that they doubted you on taking drugs and being jealous of others too much.

But their career can't be stopped here. They need to move forward on this journey - even if that means with a missing piece in their group.

>>>><<<<

[2 years later]

"8 makes 1 team...Hello we are Ateez."

The whole audience in the arena cheered. Ateez with wide smiles and sparkling eyes were watching their fans from overseas greeting them by shouting out their names. They felt so loved at that moment that they forgot the pain inside their heart, not getting to be loved by you anymore.

They love their fans a lot but your love was the precious one and when Yeosang realized that you were not there beside him in the choreography, tears fell from his eyes. It's already been 2 years but still everytime he cries during this step where you are no longer smiling while spinning with him in the center.

The concert went for two hours and they quickly changed into some casual wear afterwards and decided on takeout for the day.

The next day, at night they planned to stroll around the city and take in the view of the new place overseas and enjoy the place. They were not given any schedules for the vlog so they were free to roam around.

"I have seen this place just across the street that has a good variety of foods. Let's try it out." Yunho stated his search for this place and others agreed quickly.

All of them entered the big glass door of the restaurant and eyes roaming around in appreciation of the new place. The things decorating the tables, shelves and each corner with the soft melody of the overflowing music with the right amount of warmth and light were a perfect setting. Many customers turned towards them, a table with four girls recognized them but the rest just watched them curiously as they were standing awkwardly until a waiter offered them a helping hand.

They opted for a table at the very end as it was a bit away from the other tables and a bit hidden by a wooden rack.

They all settled down and the waiter waited for them to order. After a lot of complaints, whines, bickers and scolding, they had decided on the menu to be ordered finally.

For the time being, they were waiting for the food to arrive. They gossiped on a lot of stuff, few scrolling through Instagram and taking aesthetic pictures of the place but they don't forget to see any update from your private account. nothing. Jongho sighed and switched off his phone.

"Here is the food!" A cheerful voice made them look up at the person with two others trailing behind her. The girl didn't look at their faces but the eight boys from around the table were staring at her. she was joking with the girl beside her while placing all the bowls down the table. the other two left her when she turned around, "is there some-"

her voice got lost in her throat when she finally locked eyes with the ones watching her intently.

"y/n. you are here."

oh. they're having tours in this country. you're so busy these past few days that you didn't notice that they have announced the tour dates. yeah, even if you have left the group and moved away to a different country, you keep yourself updated with them.

you just can't get over them and this kills you inside.

"uh...um...congratulations on the comeback."

"Why did you leave the group? You don't even contact any of us." Hongjoong asked you from just the opposite direction from where you were standing.

"Isn't it obvious that I left the group not to keep in touch with you all?"

"But why?"

"Now your group is free from scandals and under no controversy. You all are having comebacks and your fans even forgot about me and giving you all the love you guys deserve. So what's the point of me being there." You chuckled in an unamused way.

Wooyoung stood up and suddenly hugged you catching you off guard, "you don't know how much we missed you. Everyday we thought that you'll call one of us or will show up to the front door. But you totally disappeared."

"It hurt us, baby. It hurts to not wake up to your side. It hurts not to see your smiling face and you walking around the dorm. Heck! I watched all the videos of you to hear your voice." San bit his lip to prevent himself from crying.

It hurts me too...

You just curled your fingers, wanting them to stop or you might break down in front of them. You thought after joining at your friend's restaurant that you won't ever come across your past life but who knew after two years here, you would be facing them again.

Licking your lips, you pushed Wooyoung off from you and eyed him before turning to them, "but you all became used to ignoring me then why suddenly you all are acting like this."

"No it's not like that."

"Really Mingi? Are you sure you're not the person who blamed me that for me all your hard work will be gone."

The chatters around the place increased with the entry of some more customers. Little did you know, your friend noticed the current situation you were in and she told other workers to take your place and not mind anything at the end table.

Jongho glared at Mingi but still he also knew that the news got them all shattered because it was their first accusation after the debut and they knew very well the cause of any controversy regarding a group. They all feared for their dreams to be crashing down.

But they were also worried for you. They all asked you about it but you're not the outspoken type and you remained silent and refused to talk to anyone. You distanced yourself from them when they hinted their anger towards you and it really scared you.

and that girl Minnie really played her wicked games with them at their weakest moment. "I'm sorry. Please forgive us for not being there for you. We-"

"Jongho, there's nothing to forgive or forget. I had some great memories with you all and I loved every moment but for me I don't want someone's dreams to end."

You weakly smiled at them.

"But what about you? How are you?" Seonghwa asked you while he approached you and held your hands in his, he caressed the soft skin and stared down.

"Honestly, I don't even know about myself. I'm totally living a different life. People don't recognize me after dying my hair and not wearing makeup and I don't come out often to serve the customers but unfortunately today I did and...."

"And what about the......drugs?"

"Joong-"

"It's okay Hwa. He is just obeying his rules being a leader." You bit your lip when retreating the hand from the hold, "those boxes in my bag were not drugs. Those were my anxiety pills. I used label-less boxes so that people won't know about my problems but that only led to some bigger problems."

Yunho stepped forward, "you had anxiety?" You nodded.

"What caused you this? I swear y/n tell me what happened to have this happen?" He was furious and you watched his impatient hand brushed his hair back.

"Yunho.....it's you guys. You all did this to me." After voicing out the words, you stared at them blankly.

"Us?" Yeosang asked you but also to himself.

"The ignorance. The blames and accusations adding up to the online comments on my posts were stressing me out and I had a consultation with my family psychiatrist." You sighed at the end of the sentence.

San suddenly asked you, "what about your dreams, y/n? You shared so many things with me with us. You planned a whole future with us. What about that?"

"I really wanted to spend my whole life with you all. To create so many memories together but I think those will just remain as dreams because of the rumors. Even if I want to get back. I won't because it would hamper your future and dream."

"But who spread the rumors on drugs?" Hongjoong sat down and held his head.

"It's-... it's..." you bit your lips and proceeded, "it's nothing. You don't have to worry about it now. I'm out of this whole thing and you are all free from all controversial posts."

You tried to smile but the tears falling from your eyes betrayed you.

"You are not coming back to us?" Yunho held your hand, he held it so dearly as if you were a delicate person. He didn't want to let it go but still somewhere in your eyes he saw the distance between you both.

There was no sign of love from you.

"No."

Jongho came in front of your view, "but please we need you. It's no more the same feelings without you. There's really a missing piece in our life." He gulped the lump of sadness and continued, "and, It's you, y/n."

"No you are a perfect team even without me. Eight makes a perfect team like you." You looked over all of them.

"And nine makes the perfect family." Seonghwa said in a hushed voice.

You shook your head, "then work on your teamwork and make it a family. I hope you will find a better girl for yourselves."

Wooyoung pushed aside Seonghwa and cupped your cheek and Hongjoong just stood behind him, watching you keenly.

"Please, y/n don't do this to me. I got to see you after two years and...and just for you to say leave me again?"

"Woo, people might be watching."

"I don't care."

"But I care. I have to work unlike you who will go back to your country after the tour ends. I have to stay back here and face these customers again and if somehow this scene got to the media then it'll be a new situation to handle. Please, I beg you. I don't want to be in a similar situation again."

You inhaled and continued, "and this time it won't be because of me but because of you. So stop before anything happens again."

" but you can stay with us. We can move out from the dorm and stay somewhere else. Also, you don't have to be with us for the sake of being a group member but as our girlfriend." Hongjoong said the words very precisely but you just laughed at him.

"You have lost the right to call me that way before. Don't say that word again. I hate it. I don't want to stay with any of you."

"But-"

"The food is getting cold. They worked hard in preparing this."

San held your hand when you stepped back, "At Least eat with us. Last time, you didn't even eat properly with us."

"Y/n, I miss you a lot." Yeosang looked at you with a longing feeling but you just ignored it.

I miss you all too...

And I know I shouldn't...

You took deep breaths, "I'm telling this to all of you. And it's my final wish to you so please kindly keep it. Just forget about me. You all have a long way to go to achieve success. Don't get stuck in the past. Pretend I never met you all. I was never a part of your life."

San gripped your wrist tighter.

Hongjoong said in a low voice, "this is impossible for us to do. How can we forget you? How can we forget all the memories of us?"

You stared at the grip and glanced at his face. He had changed a lot in these two years and the maturity in his voice and demeanor was visible.

He stared at you helplessly and waited for your response. You removed the grip and turned around.

"Enjoy the meal!"

How can they just eat now? They all have lost their appetite after this and the way you didn't even turn back to them for the last time left them staring at your direction until you disappeared behind the door beside the desk.

You entered the door and tears slid down your cheek and whispered to yourself, "pretend I was just a missing piece of your dream."

[I just realized that I don't know how to write 9th member aus like what did I write here. It could have been better but still I tried so appreciate me🥹]

Taglist: @mymoodwriting @justhere4kpop @anyamaris @yeoobin @icchyi @jwnghyuns @piratequeen-queenofgames @dinonuguaegi @oreharuuu @hwanring @sanwifesstuff @kiwiisnthereoops @kiwiraccoon @hyuukah @kazscara @aceofspadesbiofalltrades @nvdhrzn @meowmeeps @vtyb23 @haechansbbg

[open!]

[probablysimpledreams]

Another Chance (Dabi x reader)

a/n: grrrr all I can think about is Touya I just love him so so much!!! His ending and the entire LOV's endings still have me so :( and I've been imagining what it would look like if they all survived the war and got to live. Which led me to write up this fic where the reader was dating Dabi pre-war and didn't know he survived until Shoto sought you out and allow y'all to reunite!!! There's a hint of angst but overall it's very cutey because Touya deserves all the love!!!

wc: 1017

"I've killed over 30 innocent civilians. The firstborn of the Todoroki family. I am going to tell you all why I committed these heinous crimes."

Despite the words leaving the villain's mouth, you couldn't help but smile softly as you rewatched Dabi's reveal video for the fifth time. Work was slow and you were missing him a little more than usual today. Besides, it really was all you had left of him.

It had been almost three months since the war between heroes and villains went down, completely changing the world you once knew. This meant it was coming up on three months since you last saw your lover. Since the night he broke up with you, saying his time in this world was up and you should move forward. Without him.

"Excuse me," a young man says as he approaches the front desk you're seated behind. His voice snaps you out of your spiraling heartbroken thoughts. You take a deep breath, pulling yourself together and throwing on your customer service face. "Are you ______?"

"I am. How can I help you today?"

"My name is Shoto Todoroki." Your stomach drops. "Do you have a minute to talk?"

-----------------------------

For the first time in months, the week flew by. Today was finally the day you were going to reunited with Dabi. As excited as you were, anxiety was growing more and more inside your head. What if he didn't actually want to see you? What if you only make things harder for him? He was already suffering so much, maybe it would be better if you just went home and never came back and-

"He's going to be happy to see you." Shoto smiles as he places a hand on your shakey shoulder, breaking silence in the waiting room where you sat with his siblings and mother, all waiting for Touya to wake up from his nap.

"Yeah the idiot has been saying your name like every other day," Natsuo chimes in with a wide grin. "Still can't believe out of all his secrets, he had a gorgeous partner this whole time. You sure you're not some spy or something?" Fuyumi slaps his shoulder, shooting you an apologetic look before the two bicker. You chuckle at the sight, feeling your anxiety go down. You never imagined Dabi would have come from such a lively family.

"He's awake," a nurse approaches your group. You stand up with his siblings, Rei smiling softly at everyone before you all walk into his hospital room.

"Touya-nii," Shoto is the first to speak upon entering the room. "You have a guest."

"Yeah well fuck off," he grumbles, closing his eyes again despite just waking up.

"Well you heard him ______, guess we should head then," Natsuo teased loudly. Touya's eyes widen at hearing this, sitting up on the bed as his eyes scanned the room, landing on you with a shocked expression.

"________?" he asked in disbelief that you were standing here in front of him. Fuyumi and Natsuo snicker hearing his heart monitor rapidly beat, causing Touya to throw up a middle finger their way before returning his focus on you. You stood awkwardly as he sat awkwardly, unsure what to do next.

"Let's give them some privacy, yeah?" Fuyumi grabs Shoto and Natsuo before heading out the room, closing the door behind her. The silence persists until you speak up.

"Is it okay if I sit?" you ask, pointing to a spot on the large hospital bed. The size of the bed and private room must be a perk that comes with the Number One Hero's money paying for your medical bills. He nods, shakey bandaged hands smoothing out the bedsheets before you take a seat with him. "So Dabi-"

"Touya," he cuts you off. "You can call me Touya. At this point Dabi is gone." He sounded so nervous as he spoke it made your heart ache.

"Okay," you respond. "So Touya," you giggle upon hearing his heart rate monitor speed up again after saying his name. You take a shakey deep breath, collecting your thoughts. There was so much you wanted to say to him. You wanted to yell at him for leaving you. You wanted to cry, thanking the heavens and earth he was still alive. You wanted to make him promise he'd never do this to you again. Yet every time you went to open your mouth, no words would leave. Touya took notice to the conflicting emotions on your face each time you went to speak, the heavy weight of guilt tugging at his heart.

"I-I'm so sorry....." his words were quiet and it sounded like he was about to cry. He doesn't expect you to forgive me. Hell, he wouldn't be surprised if you didn't love him anymore. His heart sank as he heard muffled sobs leaving your mouth. He couldn't look at you.

"Can we start over?" you smile as he finally meets your teary eyes. His bandaged hand reaches to cup your face, thumb rubbing away the tears that have fallen from your eyes. He felt didn't deserve another chance at life like this, but god he wanted it more than anything. This time it wasn't because of hatred or spite. No he wanted to live out of love. Out of love for his siblings. For his mother. For you. Especially for you.

"Yeah, I'd like that," his voice is shakey as he speaks. He feels insanely nervous as he asks his next question, as if it's the first time he's ever asked you this. "C-can I kiss you?"

"Please." You don't care how desperate you sound in your answer. You needed him to know how you've been longing for him all this time, how he hadn't left your thoughts once since the last night you saw him. He pulls you into a sweet, gentle kiss. His lips are more burnt than the last time you shared a kiss, but it doesn't matter. He still tastes the same. He's still the same man you love. And this time, neither of you were going to let the other get away.

[amadeness]

── .✦ Dating Bakugou Katsuki - general headcanons (x male reader, time-skip)

WORD COUNT: 1097

── .✦

It takes him an unbelievable amount of time to realize he likes you. But once he does, he’ll be extremely straightforward. (He believes it will be easier for him once he gets rejected.)

Somehow always secretly knew that he was into guys but decided to ignore it. He wasn’t really interested in relationships, to begin with.

He’s not gay. He just really likes you. A man. (His words. He doesn’t want to label himself.)

Invites you on a date but forgets to tell you that it’s a date and not just you two hanging out. Realizes in the middle of the night and then just casually drops: “Oh yeah, this is a date. I like you.” like it’s not that big of a deal. Gets upset when you stare at him in confusion after.

Might try to act romantic in the beginning, it’s what he always assumed relationships are about. But once he realizes it’s not working for him, he’ll drop it pretty quickly. (Doesn’t mean that he can’t be romantic on occasion. It’s just it only works when he’s not actually trying.)

Nothing is stopping YOU from being romantic tho, if you know what I mean. 

His love languages are food and fighting. He’ll try to feed you delicious food while complimenting anything you cook (unless you’re like… really bad. Then he’ll try to teach you.) 

Everything you two do is a competition. It was like that even before you started dating but now he doesn’t get as angry when you win, just pouty. He enjoys seeing you getting better at whatever you do, it’s also a great way to spend time with each other.

The big spoon. Feels like he’s keeping you safe like this.

He’s not easing his family into anything. He’ll just casually drop that he has a boyfriend at a family dinner and move on. The fact that it was after about half of a year of you two dating isn’t that surprising.

Will refuse to elaborate when anyone asks any following questions.

The squad had to figure it out on their own. Maybe after months of him acting weird, Denki accidentally crashes your date. Katsuki still refuses to say anything, so you’ll have to be the one to break the news.

Doesn’t really get jealous. Is more offended that this whoever thought they could take his place.

He really enjoys doing simple everyday tasks with you - think cooking, grocery shopping, and cleaning. Being a pro might make some of this a bit more complicated due to the possibility of being recognized in public, but that doesn’t stop the two of you.

Personally commissions matching pieces of jewellery for your three-month anniversary. A ring (that he wears on a chain around his neck) for him and whatever you prefer for you. Both pieces can be used as trackers in case of emergencies and are made from (almost) indestructible material. Will sulk if he sees you’re not wearing it.

── .✦ Pro-Hero!reader

On the fence about working with you. Seeing you and personally making sure that you’re doing alright is easing his anxieties. Sometimes he can get a bit distracted tho.

But don’t be mistaken. He knows how strong you are and that you can take care of yourself just fine, he probably wouldn’t be into you otherwise. That doesn’t mean he can’t be anxious.

You probably went to a different hero school. You first met during a joint training/license exam and when you guys graduated, you started working for the same agency.

He’s fascinated by your efficiency on the field and strategic thinking. Your first real conversation was him asking you to spar.

── .✦ Civilian!reader

Doesn’t matter if you have a quirk or not, he’ll insist on you learning self-defence and will teach you personally.

What attracted him to you was your fearlessness while facing any kind of danger. That doesn’t mean he isn’t angry any time you get in danger’s way without you needing to.

You two probably met during some kind of emergency. You did something stupid to help apprehend the villain or save another civilian. First, he screamed at you for being too reckless. Then he complimented you on your quick thinking and courage.

Later he found out that you frequent his favourite restaurant/bar and you started talking. When the squad found out, they decided to befriend you too and adopt you into the friend group.

── .✦ nsfw

A power bottom. Wants to feel the maximum amount of pleasure but doesn’t want to give up control.

Nothing happens until he’s the one feeling it. You’re horny but he’s not? Great, take care of it on your own.

Your first time together was awkward. He refuses to talk about it in advance and just… believes that you two will figure it out as you go. The night ends with a ruined orgasm, bruise and one pouty blond.

After that, he was finally convinced to have a proper conversation with you. He wouldn’t look into your eyes the whole time, but he was surprisingly straightforward about his likes and dislikes, carefully listening to everything you’ve said.

Praise kink, but no degradation, please.

Bondage is also a big, non-negotiable no for him. As well as breath play. (both giving and receiving)

I think he’d be against consciously hurting you in general.

On the other hand, he’s really into leaving hickeys and edging. (giving)

Really into quickies if he’s the one initiating. He refuses to do it in any “weird” or unsanitary places but around the house? His favourite was the kitchen counter. (He was strictly against it at first but then it just happened and he enjoyed it a bit too much. He had to disinfect the place three times before he was calm again. Now he sometimes gets horny while cooking because he keeps thinking of it.)

Starts out rough and fast. The more rounds, the gentler and slower he gets, craving more affection.

Expects and loves aftercare, even tho he’ll pretend he hates it at first and that you don’t need to fuss about him.

Help to clean both him and the bed up before burying under the fresh covers together to cuddle and talk. Doesn’t matter if it’s about the sex you just had or about your day. He just wants to listen to your voice while lying on your chest and tracing patterns into your naked skin.

Will act annoyed if he can’t walk the next day but you both know that he wouldn’t have it any other way.

── .✦ (please excuse any mistakes, i'm not a native speaker)

── .✦ © all rights reserved to amadeness. do not repost or translate without permission.

[thesleepyhollows]

Understanding Arkhamverse scarecrow.

I’ve been wanting to make this post for awhile. I think with the release of Arkham shadow we might finally have all the necessary pieces to understand the life of Jonathan crane, his motivations and his descent into obsession.

This scene gives us a lot to work with.

Let’s start with this. It seems like unlike some versions of crane who see fear as a tool. The true face of control and power. Arkhamverse Crane sees fear as everything. This has been observed all throughout the series. From him discussing how fear drives every human action in Arkham asylum to this line in Arkham knight just before he’s defeated.

Something else I noted in that clip was Jonathan immediately trying to rationalise and analyse his reaction to his toxin using fear.

Now we’re not quite sure what this original chemical of his does. Only that its intention is to trigger the shadow within people. We can assume through both his and Batman’s reactions that it aims to do this through a similar process to the future fear toxin. Bringing out and facing people with their deepest fears. Hoping they may become them.

Though that leaves the same question. Why jump to fear. He’s clearly talented in chemistry. Surly there would be more direct ways to bring out people’s demons rather than only focusing on a single part of the shadow. Well I believe that shows us even before this realisation Jonathan had some experience and issues with fear. It’s also why his greatest fear seemingly is just. Fear itself. The helpless fears given to us from evolutions and experiences long before our time. Inherent fears.

However we also shouldn’t disregard his fixation on the shadow itself. Why does he seemingly want to get people to become their worst selves. As seen in his tapes with Harvey. Why is Jonathan crane like this?

Well I think there may have been a time where he saw someone consumed by fear. Destoryed by it.

This could draw an interesting parallel to the story of Amadeus Arkham whose story started when he watched his own mother be consumed by her mental illness before ending up consumed by it himself. I think this parallel could make a lot of sense given that I’d argue although the joker plays a more personal threat scarecrow is the main villain of the Arkham series.

So allow me to tell you what I believe to be the story of Jonathan Crane in the Arkham series. Assuming that the brief backstory we got in his Arkham asylum character bio isn’t considered canon.

A parent or other caregiver suffered from great anxiety and paranoia that caused them to do great harm. Maybe overtime perhaps in one tragic incident. Jonathan internalised this and began to grow interested in the mind. Maybe it started with good intentions. After all he does claim to be helping people in Arkham shadow. Maybe that was a lie and he’s been twisted for a very long time. Who knows.

He began work at Gotham state university and we know how that ended up.

Though it’s worth noting he clearly was brilliant. So much so that this incident unlike most versions of the character did not get him fired because his classes brought the university so much revenue. Instead he left on his own accord to take over as head of rehabilitation at blackgate. An odd choice given the amount of institutions bidding over him. They were likely offering more, far more than the job he took. Though I think his motivations for this were split. Partly is of course the obvious motivation of easy access to test subjects that couldn’t easily speak out. We can see in the previous game that he was running controlled tests likely of the chemicals we see used in Arkham shadow and his subjects were willing participants.

Now either not enough people were choosing to participate or the effects were becoming so potent it risked drawing unwanted attention to his work.

The second reason connects to my proposed backstory. Maybe he was curious to explore how fear connects and causes crime and violence via the shadow. The chain reaction that begins WITH fear.

We then see the events that happen in Arkham shadow and we find out alongside Jonathan that he’s been inhaling his own chemicals during testing. Smart move there buddy. This sends him into a psychotic spiral and forces him to confront and become his greatest fear. His shadow. Fear itself. We can see that this truly set in given how messed up he looks the following day. Not to mention his actions becoming erratic. No longer thinking to hide his crimes until after he severely injures Harvey and huffing his own chemicals right in court.

Afterwards? We’re not sure. Of course he goes on to become the scarecrow then the events play out as we see throughout the rest of the Arkham games. He gets mauled by killer croc during the events of asylum and his previously smug and joyfully sadistic personality get destroyed alongside his face. The experience clearly changed him quite drastically as a person. Although clearly it didn’t shake his core ideals and beliefs about the all consuming nature of fear.

How pitifully ironic that this idea became true in the end. As he’s injected with his own toxins his mind collapsing and giving way to permanent insanity and terror. Fear really was everything Jonathan had left in the end.

[litrary-nath]

Okay, so as a twisted wonderland fan I believe you need to keep three things in mind or you won't be able to understand the characters properly. Or only understand certain characters at a time. (Or don't do that who am I to tell you how to interact with the game lol.)

They are-

1) The characters are often wrong about themselves and each other.

We can easily see it in Lilia's speech to Leona in book 2 (because apparently Mal is as childish as Leo about ruling! He isn't a perfect prince either!) and Leona's accusations about Trey and Cater in Book 7 (Because everyone that's read book 1 knows that Riddle was not being manipulated like that.) These characters often don't talk to each other. They don't understand each other at all. So it's easy to throw out information that fans think of as fact till its proven wrong. If your pookie says something about another character there is 50-50 chance that they're totally wrong.

2) These character are mentally unwell and it affects their behavior but twst won't actually say it so figure it out.

Riddle has trauma related to rules and behavior that manifests in anger issues. Leona has depression and chronic fatigue. Azul has control issues as well along with self image issues and some sort of ED atleast. Jamil also has control issues as well as a general fear of failure. And trauma. Vil has self image issues and intrusive thoughts. Idia is... survivors guilt, social anxiety, depression, anxiety in general and I bet if Ortho asked him to just jump down into the underworld he'd do it. Malleus has abandonment issues a mile wide, the hyperfixation hints at alot and his general existence as a powerful fae has fucked up his sense of time and consent beyond help.

None of this is canon. All of this is generally accepted as true by the fandom. And this is just about the overblots omg.

3) These boys are twisted from VILLAINS

While the above point is true that isn't the only reason for their behavior. In general these characters were based around villains and as such have fucked up morals and what not. They'll gaslight, gatekeep and girl boss their way through life and not think anything of it. And you as fans should know this.

[littlelostmoth]

The Final Double Exposure Post

Okay, the game is out now and just wanted to share some final thoughts about Double Exposure and the big problems with it. All spoilers below the cut.

Ultimately, even outside of the brutal murder of Pricefield, gaming's most classic wlw couple, the game is just very poorly written. This post will acknowledge that breaking up Pricefield is terrible writing and they do not do it in a way that makes any remote sense whatsoever. While everyone can sit and say "It makes sense they broke up," it didn't. These characters are characters, ones designed to tell a story. Characters who exist as a bright spot for sapphic and queer people playing video games in 2015.

It's the same thinking as everyone used to say "Well if Nathan just had therapy, he'd be better." And to which it would be answered, "No shit, maybe he would have been better with therapy, but it's a story and he rejected going so no he didn't get better and won't get better because that's not the point of the story." Point being, you can self-justify the Pricefield break up with real world logic all you want, but the fact that even Dontnod is sad about the state of it should be telling. That in addition to the leaks about Square hating Chloe and the D9 narrative team hating her, and it was not done as a good faith way to tell a story. Ultimately, the game encourages you to choose the "Kill Chloe" ending of the original game so that Max can retain her memories of her in a pure way, while also removing her from story. If you choose what the D9 devs believe is the morally evil choice, you get horrible Chloe.

There is SOME good stuff in here, but it's not enough to justify the game's existence. Here are the short amount of pros we compiled for the game: the music is well done, the environments are very nice, and the side characters are fine for the most part.

That's it. Everything else is a con: the story, the handling of Max and Safi as characters, the entire mystery of the game basically being shafted in favor of... making the most important thing about Life is Strange the superpowers. It just seems like this game misunderstands what Life is Strange is or was at any point.

Max is so horribly out of character in this game. Why? Why does she do the things she does? Sometimes she feels like a natural adult version of the original game's Max, while other times she's overly horny to the Nth degree. Max has the ability to cheat on her two love interests, and both love interests reject her in the appropriate timelines of pursuance. Within the text of the game, she uses her powers to circumvent the fact that they've rejected her.

Remember the original game's ending? Nightmare!Max accuses Max of selfishly using her powers to manipulate others to her own selfish end. Ultimately, we're left with the fact that Max used her powers to help get others to like her because she didn't have many friends and was a target of bullying. It's morally dubious, but she wasn't doing any of it for like selfish personal gain. It was an extension of her anxiety.

This game goes around this and makes Max purposefully use her powers for selfish gain. The entire first game revolved around the concept of whether or not she was using it for selfish gain. She wasn't. Now the game forces Max to go through the same exact arc, but this time she is actively being awful instead. Not only cheating, but using it to get around being actively romantically rejected.

Then there's how the game handles its story. Like what the hell is going on here? How does any of it make sense. Spoilers again, but the mastermind is Safi, and Safi is a shapeshifter. She wants to take over with world with Max and collect her own superhumans to form a what? A Legion of Doom? Why? Why is Safi a villain? Her villain arc literally comes out of nowhere and the game does little to sell how she goes from wanting a book deal in the beginning to "I have godlike powers, let's take over the world together." Like honey, WHAT? WHY? And the fact the final choice is to join or refuse her??? LIKE WHAT? WHERE DOES IT COME FROM? WHY WOULD MAX, WHO EITHER HAD TO MAKE THE CHOICE TO SACRIFICE A TOWN OR HER LOVED ONE AND IS ETERNALLY TORMENTED OVER BOTH... SUDDENLY ONBOARD WITH BECOMING JUST A GENERIC EVIL GIRL?

And that's it??? Nothing else in the game matters. The romances go nowhere, thus making breaking up with Chloe pointless since it's not like the game allows Max to pursue a relationship seriously any further. Or just the mere fact she's shitty for doing so. None of the plot points of this game matter, and the mystery the game is built on doesn't matter.

It's like... Here's a murder mystery! Without the murder or the mystery! And then... the game just ends. It just ceases to exist and stops without any sort of... ending that feels satisfying. We get an AVENGERS LEVEL END SCREEN OF "MAX CAULFIELD WILL RETURN."

We think about the endings to the other game's endings. They all have some sort of conclusion that feels like its own self contained experience. You get this long and depressing ending of Chloe dying and her funeral... You get this wistful drive out of Arcadia Bay as Obstacles plays. You get Sean surrendering himself to the police so Daniel can live to grow old and not suffer for the sins of those older than him, and how Sean comes out after. You get to see how Chloe and Rachel grow as time passes to the first game. You get to see how Alex chooses to live her life on her own terms after so long of feeling like she was trapped. You get all of these different endings for the game and here you get... what amounts to the exact same ending depending on your choice which is to be horribly evil supervillain when the time comes or not, and then sequel bait with Diamond and Safi. Why? Why does she have a bleed from her nose? Since when did that become a common occurrence for superpowers? Or storms when powers are overused along with nightmares?

In the original game, the nosebleeds are a result of Max twists reality around her as the epicenter. It's the physical damage she gets for what her powers are physically doing to existence. The storm? The point is, we don't know why the storm comes.

When did Life is Strange become about superpowers and taking over the world? When did it become all of these things? Like True Colors isn't a perfect game by any means, but for fuck's sake it at least knew the scale of what a Life is Strange game should be. Small town mysteries with a colorful cast we love and hate. To this day, I still think that the Jed stuff is some of the most morally fascinating questions to be raised in the franchise. To have that final choice be to either forgive him or not? It's an incredible final choice that is so intertwined with the game's themes. To leave or to stay afterwards? They're both extremely meaningful, dual choices.

This game does nothing. That's ultimately it. What did we gain from Double Exposure? Nothing. It doesn't continue Max's character in any meaningful way. It does little to build upon the actual lore of the original game. It doesn't actually use any original characters except Chloe and that's solely to drive it in how much they despise her from a writing perspective.

Regardless of how well each game did at telling their stories... They all had something meaningful to say in some way. Even if Before the Storm is not a game that I'd necessarily say is amazing, there is some thought and thematic purpose put to that game. It's still 1000 times the game this will ever be.

When I was first exposed to the game's ending... the emotion I felt was pure and raw bafflement. Not anger. Not sadness. Bafflement and bewilderment. I had no idea what the fuck I just played or what I gained from it? What does Max as a character gain from this story? What do any of the characters in this game gain from the story? Nothing. The game starts and then it ends. And we all gained absolutely nothing from the experience. (And in BtS the ending is fine, because it's a prequel that has to have a clearly defined ending to lead into the first game. You can't break Chloe and Rachel's relationship, it always has to be what it is.)

For a long time I really hated the Life is Strange comics. It felt like a kick in the head to the original game's story. But then after it ended and this came out, we can view it as a more honest and genuine follow up to the games as opposed to... whatever we got here.

The comics focus heavily on Max's perceived guilt over what happened to Arcadia Bay. She comes to believe that she, herself, is the problem in reality. That she makes everyone around her unhappy, including Chloe. While Chloe reassures her this is not true... she ends up displaced and removed from reality... and punishes herself by sending her to a world where Chloe is happy with Rachel.

The rest of the story is Max and Chloe apart for years, as Max wrestles with her guilt... while Chloe waits for her. Chloe waits and knows Max is out there still. Max eventually realizes how wrong she was after self-reflection and being around the alt!Chloe and Rachel helps her realize she was wrong.

Chloe builds them a home.

Chloe comes to move past her own grief, just as Max did.

Chloe helps rebuild Arcadia with her own hands. She decides she has a home. This town, with Max. And then they're together... And that's what matters because... like Michel said: "They have each other."

And that is what Life is Strange was about. These two young women, who were best friends... they grew apart through tragedy and life circumstances... And then they found each other again, fell in love, and even in tragedy had one another to rely on.

I am who I am because of Life is Strange.

I met the love of my life because of Life is Strange.

And no matter how bad Double Exposure is... It can't take away Life is Strange, Max, or Chloe from me.

No.

It can't take them away from us. From all of us who cared enough to stick around this funny little 20$ adventure game from a decade ago.

[meeludrawz]

New Rehab program

Shigaraki x Reader

~ You're the very last therapist that the law has sent to "help" Shigaraki Tomura. All Might is the one who recommended you but the thing is, you have to be roommates with the villain ~

Warnings: You have anxiety and skin picking problems (Not mentioned in this text but will be in next parts)

"Young Shimura is in his bedroom, forgive him but I do not think that he will come to meet you."

You simply nodded at the blonde 7ft tall man. Even though he wasn't in his "buff form", he looked huge nonetheless. "I understand, I'm like, what, the 10th therapist he's seeing in the span of 2 months?"

All Might offered a little smile as an apology. "Yes, but I believe it will work this time. I have faith"

You showed a weak smile, that was totally not stressful at all. The former Symbol of Peace was trusting the rehabilitation of the biggest villain of Japan into your hands. Yeah, noooo pressure.

In front of the apartment where Shigaraki lived, All Might gave you the keys and reminded you that Tomura couldn't do anything since he was wearing a necklace that was deactivating his quirk. Which reassured you, because your quirk couldn't do anything against his. But if he tried attacking you, while wearing that necklace, you'd be fine.

Your quirk consisted of enhancing your reflexes, you could dodge pretty much anything or anyone. You couldn't read their movements, but your body warned you everytime something dangerous would occur. It also helped a lot whenever you dropped something, multiple glasses of water weren't broken to this day.

All Might eventually left and you took a deep breath, you hadn't realized it earlier but you were shaking a little. Who wouldn't? You were going to become the new roommate of the worst criminal in all of Japan.

You unlocked the door and walked in with your luggages. To your surprise, the place was neat. You wouldn't need to clean on your first day, how great!

You looked around and realized that there was no one in sight. In all honesty, you didn't know how this new rehab program worked, should you tell him you were there? So he wouldn't jolt if he ever laid his eyes on you? Tightening the grip on your backpack, you shakily walked forward and closed the door behind you. "Hello?" Your voice trembled. "Um.. I'm your new roommate" Nothing happened, maybe you should've said you were the new therapist? Though, being the 10th one in the span of 2 months, you didn't think he'd care.

"Well.. I guess I'll put my stuff in the room.." You sighed to yourself, a bit relieved that he didn't directly jumped on you to try to kill you or something.

You removed your shoes and spotted a bright red pair of sneakers, they were too big to fit you. Maybe they were his? They looked almost new, guess he didn't go outside that much. You put your shoes next to them and walked towards the hallway. Based on what All Might had said, your bedroom was at the end of it and on the left.

The left door was wide open, and from what you could see inside, there was only a bed and a desk. You guessed that it was yours then, since it was empty. Right in front of your bedroom was a closed door, from the inside, you could hear noises. Mostly fast clicking and music. The sound was similar to when you used the buttons on a controller. You weren't unfamiliar with video games, but with your job, you didn't have that much time to play anymore.

Maybe you could play a bit today, you weren't planning on giving a therapy anyways as you would give yourself some time to unpack.

It was around 6pm when you were almost done unpacking most of your stuff. You just couldn't focus on that anymore when your stomach kept screaming that it was hungry. You sighed and got up. Fine, you'll eat, even if you would've preferred to finish placing your stuff first but your belly was being annoying.

Walking out of your new bedroom, you realized that Shigaraki's door was still closed. He only went to the bathroom once but you never saw him. You were inside your closet, folding clothes when you heard his bedroom door close. Maybe it was a missed opportunity, but you didn't want to force him either.

You entered the kitchen and looked inside the fridge and cupboards. After a few minutes of searching, you eventually decided to make some donburi for you and some for him too. Usually, you'd make food for yourself alone but you lived with someone now so, you thought about his stomach.

Multiple minutes later, as you were still cooking, you turned around and jolted very badly. Luckily, you didn't drop anything due to your quirk, but Shigaraki Tomura was standing right behind the kitchen island, staring at you.

Shigaraki was a bit taller than you, his scarlet eyes were almost hidden behind his long white locks. He was glaring at you like you didn't belong here, and truth to be told, you also felt like you didn't belong here either. But it was your job and you needed the money to pay for your bills.

You silently stared back, what were you supposed to do? Your breathing and heartbeat increased as you felt anxious in his company, but you tried your best to remain calm.

"H-Hey, uh, I'm… making dinner… It's.." You turned to look at the pot on the oven, then back at him. "..Not ready yet.." You almost talked in whispers, your throat wasn't able to talk louder, you were just too anxious. "Y-You like donburi?"

He didn't answer, instead he just walked back to his bedroom.

Well.. That was going to be interestingly awkward.

At least, he didn't try to kill you..

During the next week, you just calmly lived your life and Shigaraki lived his. He didn't do much except locking himself into his bedroom and sometimes walking out to go to the bathroom.

The second week was more.. Rough.

The young man had decided to threaten and provoke you.

You, personally, didn't know why.

But him? He was already sick of you. Why weren't you forcing him into therapy sessions? That was more than annoying, all the other therapists were just tossing him onto the couch and forced him to have a therapy. But you never did, why?

One day, it just slipped out of his mouth. "Why aren't you doing shit?"

He was standing at the edge of the living room, his hands in his hoodie's pocket. He was fuming, you could easily see it in his body language. Yet, sitting on the floor as you played your favourite video game, you only confusedly glanced back. You put your game on pause and turned to him. "What do you mean..? I've been cooking, cleaning-"

Tomura quickly interrupted you. "I'm not talking about those, idiot. Why the hell aren't you doing your job?"

You tilted your head to the side, slightly scared and still confused. "..You want a therapy?"

His expression switched for a second, you would've missed it if you had blinked. "Obviously not" He snarled.

"Then.. W-Why are you asking? Why would I force you?" You tried your best to stay calm as you weren't sure how he would react if he'd get mad. "My job is to help people, sure, but if you don't want any help, I can't do anything." You took a deep breath as he would probably not like how you would word what was next. "It's your problem, not mine. I can only do something, if you, want to get helped"

Tomura blinked, he looked surprised at your answers for a few seconds before he stormed back to his bedroom, slamming the door behind him.

You also blinked, not really understanding what was going on.

In the past two weeks, he had never talked to you this much. Were you progressing? Maybe.. Maybe not.

Part 2

Pt 3

[after-witch]

Horrorfest: And Be Immortal [Yandere Dabi x Reader]

Title: And Be Immortal [Yandere Dabi x Reader]

Synopsis: "I think I'm being haunted," you say. "By the ghost of my dead best friend."

For Horrorfest request:

Dabi with the movie Candyman?

Word Count: 1084

notes: yandere, implied kidnapping

“I think I’m being haunted.” 

The words come out so fast that you’re not entirely sure that your friend heard them at first, until she gives you a look that is a mixture of pity, confusion  and--maybe you’re imagining it--curiosity. 

“By my best friend’s ghost,” you continue, when she doesn’t say anything. You stumble a bit over the words, realizing how crazy it sounds, how out-there. Especially to your friend who has never given so much as an inkling that she believes in anything remotely supernatural. 

“He died when we were younger--there was a fire, and…” 

You shake your head, unwilling to go further. 

Your friend reaches out, touches your arm. When you look up, she’s got the softest, kindest expression on her face. A smile, subtle and warm, with a twitch of knowing anxiety behind it.

“I know something that might help.”

--

You wake up, breath hitching, sweat covering the back of your head, making your hair and pillowcase damp and uncomfortably warm. 

--

“All you have to do is say their name in the mirror three times,” your friend told you. “And they will appear to you.” She paused. “You could try to get closure. Or at least know that you’re not crazy.” She laughed a little, but the sound didn’t match her expression. 

It was your turn to look confused--and curious.

“My neighbor had a problem with a ghost,” she clarified. You stared, and she bit her lip. “And… so did I, once.”

You frowned. She had never mentioned it, not even once. 

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

Your friend shrugged.

“You probably wouldn’t have believed me back then.”

You said nothing, because she was probably right on that count. You didn’t really believe in ghosts yourself until a few weeks ago. 

That was when it all started--the haunting. 

Items missing from your apartment, treasured things. Your old stuffed bear. A photo of you and Touya as children, and that hurt the most, because it was the only one you still had. 

Your mother had misplaced your photo album before you moved out, but this one, the one you kept in a frame on your bookshelf, had been spared. Admittedly, the photo frame had gotten dusty, but so had other things from your childhood.

And now it was gone. Who would take it? Not some petty thief. Nothing valuable was missing. Just your personal treasures, and trinkets.

And then there were the noises. Footsteps in the night. The sound of a cupboard opening and shutting in the morning, before you got out of bed; sometimes they were left open, and your fingers twitched while you shut them.

And… you swear, you swear this is true, you began to get the distinct feeling that you were being watched. During the night, and then during the day. While you tried to sleep. While you showered. While you ate what simple meals you threw together, unable to focus much on cooking or shopping as time went on.

If what your friend told you is true, maybe you can get some closure. 

Maybe you can ask Touya to stop haunting you. 

Maybe you can tell him you’re sorry.

--

This isn’t going to work. It can’t work. It’s stupid. It’s crazy. You’re crazy.

You take a breath, then another. You’re just anxious. You’re just… frayed.

Nothing will happen, probably, and you’ll realize that this has all just been some walking fever dream, the end-result of too much stress from university and your job and all the villain attacks in the area. Your mind has clearly retreated to the last time you felt understood, safe, comfortable; aching for the hole left by the loss of your best friend, a hole that could never be filled no matter how much dirt you tried to shovel into it.

Your fingers fumble with the matches in the darkness of the bathroom. You were tempted to leave the door open, but your friend was clear on that count: it needs to be as dark as possible when you complete the ritual. 

There’s the telltale sound of the match strike, the faint scent of sulfur. And then the match is lit and you quickly hold it down towards the tea candles you set up on the bathroom counter. When they’re lit, the bathroom is less dim, but no less frightening. If anything, the flickering candlelight bouncing off the walls gives the room (and your reflection) a strangeness that makes your chest tighten.  

Just… do it. Do it and get it over with, and if nothing happens, then you can call a therapist to work through your clearly ongoing grief and stress issues. But if it does work, then maybe… maybe.

You exhale, closing your lips a little, and look straight into the mirror. 

“Touya… Touya… Touya.”

A moment, then another. Then another. 

But the reflection in the mirror doesn’t change. There is no rippling, no blurring, no appearance of the ghost of your dead friend. Nothing at all, except your own tired face and the flickering yellow-orange light of candles. 

A low ache blooms in your chest. What were you expecting? That his ghost would show up in the mirror and forgive you for not being there for him, forgive you for letting his picture get dusty, forgive you for living the life he never did? 

You scoff at yourself, at the ember-lit reflection in the mirror.

And then the bathroom door behind you creaks open, and every nerve in your body stands on edge.

The reflection in the mirror does change, then. Not replacing yours but showing a figure standing behind you. Not just a figure--

Touya is standing behind you.

Only his hair is black and he is burnt and it’s Touya, Touya, Touya burnt from the fire and here to drag you to hell or drive you crazy or something incomprehensible in between.  

You turn, slowly, aware of his reflection in the mirror, aware of the way adrenaline has taken away your ability to feel your body.

“Touya,” you say, voice hoarse. I’m sorry, how are you, why are you here, why have you been haunting me--all these words stick to the roof of your mouth.

The specter grips your wrists with all-too-warm hands, and oh, oh, this is not a specter but flesh and blood before you, something twisted and wrong but wholly alive.

“Not anymore,” he breathes out, and he smells of sulfur and ash. 

The candles behind you all snuff into darkness at the same time. 

[majoryeager104]

Could you do what it would be like to date Dabi if he was in college and didn’t turn into a villain?? ( I’ve read so much of your work idk if you have already done this lol) Btw, I’m in LOVE with the way you write Dabi sm pls don’t stop🥲🫶🏻

omg yes ofc also tysm im really glad u enjoy my content 🫶🫶🫶

p.ssss I put a short lil pre-relationship smau at the bottom cos I’ve been experimenting 😗

✦•······················•✦•······················•✦•······················•✦

Being in many of the same classes with your boyfriend was equal parts frustrating and endearing, much as he was in general. The two of you started out friends, and your relationship sort of…happened. Out of the blue, you realized that the little coffee trips the two of you would take in the morning, where he’d sit for hours in the cafe and study with you, even though he probably had much better things he could be doing… you started to realize those were…dates.

His little hand touches and flirtations, and the way he’d tense up when another guy seemed remotely interested in you, not to mention how awkward he’d get when the two of you were alone, those things began to make much more sense.

All these little signals and signs of affections led you to straight up ask him, to which he grinned and said “I thought it was obvious” before kissing you on the cheek and running away like an idiot with his friends Tomura and Keigo quick on his tail, shouting from surprise that he’d professed and even kissed you so openly. He’d vented to them about how nervous he’d been around you, so where’d those nerves go?

and after all this time, you still weren’t sure.

So yes, sharing classes with him was frustrating, and yet endearing. Frustrating, because your relationship, real as it was, hadn’t changed much on paper. He still treated you just the same, flirtatious grins, cocky remarks and all, but just a few added in kisses and occasional sweet words whispered in your ear in a busy hallway. It was frustrating to see him treat your relationship so… well, normally, you supposed. But at the very same time, you found his expressions of love to be ever so endearing, because all the things mentioned above were made that much sweeter by the very knowledge that those behaviors and words were saved for you.

Touya was the top of your class, always passing effortlessly, and he was handsome to boot, and yet he only had eyes for you. He only ever went out of his way to help you. And when he needed advice? You’re on speed dial. The two of you are quite the dynamic duo, if you can believe that. And I say that because no one really does. Another frustrating part of your relationship is, unless they’ve bore witness to his affections towards you, most classmates would have no idea you two were together.

But you could look past that…kind of. Even though the girls across the room were ogling him like he was the hottest man they’d ever seen (with that quirk they wouldn’t be wrong) you had to sit and tell yourself that everything would be fine. Touya would say the same thing, he’d say not to worry about them, because he didn’t give a flying fuck about them. His words not mine.

So yeah, your relationship with Touya is… interesting. But, he was also the only guy you’d ever really gotten along this well with. Before him, you swore you’d focus on your studies and stay out of relationships in college, but here you are. And before you, and college, he’d never been able to even dream of getting into a relationship with someone as amazing as you, but here he was.

Oh and all that anxiety he’d had around you? All those nerves that had seemingly disappeared when he confessed?

He was drunk as hell.

liquid courage, I suppose Surprise surprise

(According to Touya, your reaction was worth the hangover)

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🤭🤭🤭 lemme know what you think <3

(Ps he changed ur name on his phone to “clingy bitch 💗” yes he just added a heart but that’s ok it’s the thought that counts)

[blueishspace]

Hero, Villain God 26

(Prev) (Next) (First)

*Grian's pov*

You plan to officially meet up with Pearl two days later, as civilians, at a coffee shop that just happens to be where you met Scar as well... Interesting how coincidences are.

You desperately needed the break from Scar's anxiety... he's really energetic on his own and being stressed makes it worse somehow.

When, on the day you decided on, you arrive she is already waiting for you near the counter, talking to a red-haired barista she seems to know personally in some way, you aren't going to lie... It's a bit akward interrupting their conversation like this but at the same time you really don't really want to just stand there like an idiot. Luckily she notices you, or maybe she used her powers to sense you or something ...you aren't sure that's how it works but whatever, and waves you to join her.

"So are the two of you related?"

You turn to the redhaired barista and look at her name tag, Cleo huh? You think about it, in a way you are cousins-

"Oh, he's my brother, Grian"

Ok, guess you are going with this story now. You aren't going to fight her about this, she's the goddess of wisdom and you don't really have a better story. The barista nods and takes your order before leaving to go and prepare it. You do have to ask though.

"Brother huh?"

"In the fake backstory I made for myself I mentioned having a brother, this was the perfect way to deal with that specifc loose end and at the same time introduce you without it being suspicious"

"We still have different accents"

"Split parents, grown up in different countries. That should work if someone were to question it."

"...You could have just used your powers to convince them of anything."

"That would be a waste, mate. And an insult."

The barista... Cleo comes back with your orders and you smile at them.

"So, couldn't help but wonder, how do you know my ...sister?"

They freeze for a millisecond at that before giving an answer, interesting.

"We are roomates, there's me Pearl and our other roomate Scott."

"Oh, I didn't know that"

Pearl sips on her coffee, she's secretly enjoying this, thats an even more interesting reaction. Then after a few seconds she speaks up.

"Oh, I had no reason to tell you ... It's a pretty new arrangement"

"Hmm alright!"

The barista leaves again to serve another customer soon after.

...

"They are a villain too aren't they?"

"Yep, though technically in a way she wasn't wrong about the three of us being roomates. It just omitted a lot of important information"

"Guessing that Scott guy they mentioned is also a villain?"

"Sure thing"

"...Who?"

"Phthisis and Winter King, you can guess who is which"

"Thought Phthisis was more...hmmm, how can you say it... zombie-like?"

"Oh, they can be."

You nod and that conversation is cut off there as you sit down at a table. You have an idea though.

"You know, I should introduce you to my roomate as well since we are at it"

"Roommate who I'm sure is not involved in anything? For example heroism or vigilantism or villainy."

"Of course, why would he be connected to any of them."

"... Is it Hotguy?"

"Oh no no no! It's Boogeyman!"

". . .You have very weird tastes in men"

"So do you."

"What? Scott? Ahahah! Never said I didn't, did I?"

""Eh guess not! So?"

"I guess I could come by to introduce myself, it will at least make the deception more believable."

She looks at your coffee as she sips her own.

"Also the whole chaotic energy thing you have going on turned your coffee into slime, you should get an hold on that before someone else notices. Or don't, dealing with consequences for once might do you good."

You look down at your cup... It did turn into goop...well, that's disappointing, you kinda wanted to drink it. Oh well.

"I'll tell Mumbo about it then... I'm sure he'll say yes."

*End of Chapter 6*

[wangxianficfinder]

Fic Finder

Aug 3rd

~*~

1. Hi can you help me find this fic ?

So it was set during the Sunshot Campaign, vivid war setting, a lot of explicit sexual content,a long fic I think but definitely more than 10k. It was about Wangxian getting too during the war. I remember only some bits. LWJ asked JC for permission to get married or something of the sort and JC got mad because he thought LWJ was joking but started to negotiate with LXC when it became apparent he was not. Before the final battle WWX promised LWJ that they won't die.During the final battle LWJ got hurt and seemingly died and WWX lost control and made a giant earthquake that collapsed Koi Tower with JGS inside. LWJ was kind of dead for a while but his spirit stuck around (I don't remember why really just that maybe it was part of some spell?) and WWX managed to resurrect him but he needed to regain his memories slowly.

FOUND? The dreamers. by orange_crushed (E, 17k, WangXian, Dreams, Dreamsharing, Spells & Enchantments, Canon Divergence, Oral Sex, Penetrative Sex, War, Canon-Typical Violence, Sunshot Campaign, Temporary Character Death, The Character Dies But Does Not Stay Dead Trust Me, Resurrection, Suicidal Thoughts, Loss of Identity, Hurt/Comfort, Heavy Angst with a Happy Ending, Injury Recovery, Trauma, Memory Loss, Memory Magic, War Is Hell Etcetera, I Promise The Characters Do Not Stay Dead and Will Absolutely Be Okay, Masturbation, Fantasy, Very Brief Mention of Burial-Mounds-Era Cannibalism, Major Character Death... but only for a minute honestly!!, Awkward First Times, Marriage Proposal)

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2. I'm looking for a fic where Wei Wuxian wasn't killed at the attack at Nightless City but taken captive by the Jins. It's discovered that, to escape the loss of his loved ones and the abuse at the Jin's hands, that he's grown a new core while dreaming and can now dream cultivate. He even manages to bring back Jiang Yanli. I can't find it and hope it hasn't been deleted. Any help tracking this one down would be greatly appreciated!

FOUND? Dream a little dream of me by Moominmammashandbag (M, 60k, WangXian, NHS/MXY, Prison, Hair Washing, WWX thinks he is dreaming, Hurt/Comfort,vFluff and Angst, mentions of torture, MXY deserves love, Mention of dismemberment, Coming Out, Plotting and scheming, animate body parts, goose, and supporting avian cast, Anxiety Disorder, Anxiety Attacks, Reincarnation, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Incest, Do not fuck with NHS, Dreamwalking, Angst with a Happy Ending, I have read chapter 118 of MDZS ergo I regard JGY as a villain, JC is not a villain, just flawed, JZX Lives)

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3. looking for a fic that's set during the sunshot campaign, after wwx leaves the burial mounds and is found by lwj and jwy. all I recall is one chapter where jwy attacks wwx and endangers wwx. lwj rescues wwx and takes him to the medical tent, and then confronts jwy. I believe the fic author provided two versions of lwj's confrontation w jwy, one of which is a full on physical fight. does this ring a bell? thanks! @potatokunst

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4. hi, i vaguely remember reading a fic where wwx runs around the lan sect political hall in front of the other sect leaders threatening to strip to defuse political tensions HAHA i dont remember the name of the fic but if you could find that that would be great! thank you so much :)

FOUND? Kingfisher Feathers by anonymous (E, 165k, WIP, WangXian, A/B/O, Alpha LWJ, Omega WWX, Rut Sex, Knotting, Mating Cycles/In Heat, Palace, Royalty, Everyone Lives, Married but one of them doesn't remember it, Amnesia, Historical Inaccuracy, Harems, but not really because we all know lwj only ever sees wwx, Emperor LWJ, War Hero WWX, Collars as a status symbol, Eventual mpreg, Bonding, Claiming Bites, Mutual Pining, Breeding Kink, hints of dubcon cos the whole situation is kinda icky, trope-typical sexism, Dubious Consent, Angst with a Happy Ending)

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5. Hi! I am looking for this fic:

Wei wuxian either goes back in time or loses his memory. But it is back in burial mounds. And he has lost any love for Jiang Cheng. His golden core starts to come back to himself. Jiang Cheng comes to burial mounds demanding an explanation and wwx is rude as he doesn't have that brotherly love anymore

FOUND? 💖 Return to Sender by Thesaurus_with_no_words (M, 72k, WIP, WangXian, Canon Divergence, BAMF WWX , WangXian Get a Happy Ending, YLLZ WWX, Golden Core Transfer Fix-It, Not Everyone Dies, canon JC characteristics, Temporary Amnesia, Partial Memory Loss, Literal Emotional Manipulation, Unreliable Narrator, Unreliable Narrator WWX, they are all unreliable ok, Burial Mounds Settlement Days, Canon-Typical Violence, Canon typical horror and gore, Slow Burn)

FOUND? The Core Issue by Hauntcats (T, 21k, WangXian, Angst with a Happy Ending, Not JC Friendly, Canon Divergence)

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6. Im looking for this fic please let me know if you can find it

I don't remember a lot of it but in the end there is a battle and lwj and wwx are together and all the sect leaders are also on the battlefield. They can see that there is another flute and xichen finds out its jgy and su she responsible for it.

FOUND? 🔒 Living by WithBroomBefore (G, 15k, WangXian, JC & WWX & JYL, Canon Divergence, Fix-It, Not Everyone Dies, POV LWJ, WWX Lives, JYL Lives, Family Feels, Siblings, Crying, Lots of it, Suicide Attempt, just the one though, everyone goes to Lotus Pier, plot happens offscreen, Healing, Sad with a Happy Ending, Canon-Typical Violence, Minor Character Death,nmostly just hugs and weeping and healing, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Hugs)

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7. Hello! I have another fic finder request for you. I think wwx is a prince of the royal family that rules of gods/goddesses. I think lwj might've been mortal, but I'm not sure. I can't remember exactly how wwx and lwj meet, but I think they promised each other that they would marry. lwj then goes home and finds out that his marriage has been arranged - turns out it was wwx's family who got too excited and asked behind his back. I think wwx goes to find lwj in a tent(?) and tells him the truth before the wedding happens. Sorry it's kind of vague. Thank you everyone!

FOUND? cloudy autumn heaps the sky by anatheme (T, 23k, WangXian, Fantasy, Universe Alteration, Secret Identity, Dragon LWJ, Fox WWX, Strangers to Friends to Lovers, Timeline What Timeline, wwx is a little older here, wwx piling gifts on lwj and encouraging hoarding tendencies, Sharing a Bed, Literal Sleeping Together, Arranged Marriage)

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8. Hi! This is fic finder. A modern au where WangXian an ex. WWX works as a model and LWJ is a parfumer. LWJ got a job for YZY. When he goes to the meeting, he sees a bilboard that has WWX on it. Then he messed up the meeting. WWX and LWJ then work together. LWJ places got blown up. WWX asked LQR to sponsor LWJ. Thats all thank you! @idontknowwhattowriteforusername

FOUND! 🔒 heart notes by spookykingdomstarlight (E, 92k, Modern, Fashion & Models, Slow Burn, Angst with a Happy Ending, Mutual Pining, Reconciliations, Family Drama, exes to friends to lovers, Second Chances, Breaking Up & Making Up, Flashbacks, POV Alternating, Perfume, Fire,bminor injury, Perfumer LWJ, Model WWX, just this once CSSR lives, LWJ's past mistakes come back to haunt him, the inherent eroticism of perfume and the application therein, a little bit of pining while fucking, shockingly enough this narrative does not rely on misunderstandings to fuel the plot)

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9. Hello!! Could you help me find a fanfic where wwx travels back in time as a ghost(? some people cant see him) and he stumbles upon lwj and lxc when they were kids, and he starts taking care of them like giving them treats and comforts lwj & lxc when they lost their mother

Thank you ! <3 @reredamancy

FOUND! Waiting by Morgana_avalon (G, 46k, WangXian, LXC & LWJ, Short Story, LWJ is five year old, LXC is eight year old, LWJ as a boy kneeling in the snow at the jingshi waiting for his mama to return, brothers looking out for each other, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, canon divergent but also canon compliant, Mystery, Mysticism, Chenqing, didn't know the name of Lan Zhan and Lan Xichen's father when I started writing this, Bichen, happy endings!, The Qilin, Author has no clue how to use birth/courtesy names correctly, Based on the TV-series and not the novel)

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10. Hi sorry to bother y'all, I am looking for a fic I've lost, (I need to learn to Bookmark them with Tags I can remember), and I need help finding it.

A) Basically WWX gets taken in by the Lans because YZ traumatized him to be afraid of Lotuses and Purple? I can't really remember but he gets to stay with LWJ because of it.

B) Mingjue after death gets turned into a talking head/loud goose and the cultivation world looses it's head.

Thanks so much for your all's effort in this blog! (^_^♪)

10A)

FOUND!🔒 this body yet survives by RoseThorne (T, 54k, WangXian, WIP, No War AU, Recovery, Trauma, Dissociation, Courtship, Courting Rituals, Near Death Experiences, Attempted Murder, Eventual Happy Ending, Panic Attacks, Vomiting, Siblings, Protective Siblings, Soup, Triggers, Protective LWJ, Protective LQR, Yúnmèng Siblings Dynamics, Bad Parent YZY, POV Third Person, POV LWJ, reference to poisoning, reference to assassination, Reference to chronic illness, reference to infanticide, Depression, Minor Injuries, Painting, Gift Giving, WWX Has a Fear of Dogs, Good Sibling JC, Good Sibling JYL, BAMF WWX,, Jealous SS, WWX Protection Squad)

10B)

FOUND? Dream a little dream of me by Moominmammashandbag (M, 60k, WangXian, NHS/MXY, Prison, Hair Washing, WWX thinks he is dreaming, Hurt/Comfort,vFluff and Angst, mentions of torture, MXY deserves love, Mention of dismemberment, Coming Out, Plotting and scheming, animate body parts, goose, and supporting avian cast, Anxiety Disorder, Anxiety Attacks, Reincarnation, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Incest, Do not fuck with NHS, Dreamwalking, Angst with a Happy Ending, I have read chapter 118 of MDZS ergo I regard JGY as a villain, JC is not a villain, just flawed, JZX Lives)

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11. I cannot for the life of me remember this fic although I'm sure it's a time travel fix it. The scene that has been stuck in my head is:

During the sunspot campaign (?) jzx admits he wants to marry jyl, and wwx and jwy sit down to negotiate the terms (it is implied that they're going to take him for everything he's got and he's going to let them). Just then mianmian bursts in towing a very confused jgy who then realised what's going on.

I thought it might be paper moon but they never broke their bethrothal. I've gone through my bookmarks and still can't place the scene. Please help!! @theladypeartree

FOUND! Lynchpin by ShanaStoryteller (Not Rated, 103k, WangXian, JC & WWX, Time Travel, Fix-It)

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12. Hello there! I need help i am looking for a fic it was an Alien Invation au i think? Lan Wangji is in the Military with his brother Lan Xichen and Nie Mingjue. They were trying to fight some of the aliens but Lan Wangji got seperated and met wei wuxian who was a scientist. There was also Jiang Cheng and Wen Ning. Hope you can find it please! Thankyouu! @lynthecat

FOUND? Deleted "Son Of A Soldier Boy" by FireAwayy. The cached link for chapter 1. If they want to read the rest of the fic they will have to search each chapter to find the cached version. I did check the Wayback Machine but the fic isn't available there (but here is that link too if interested: https://archiveofourown.org/works/41843295 ) // Number 12 for yesterday’s fic finder sounds like “Son Of A Soldier Man” by FireAwayy. They deleted some of their fics a while back including this one. The fic is not available on the wayback machine but you can access it, chapter by chapter, through cached search results. I haven’t been able to find all the chapters but I imagine some more sleuthing can dig them up. You can follow this tutorial for info on how to access cached pages. Note that Google Chrome no longer caches links, so you have to use an alternative like Microsoft Bing (ext for Chrome available) to access. 

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13. For fic finder: My apologies if I recently sent in this ask: this fic has been on my brain for the last few days and I can’t remember if I already wrote in about it or not! It was a modern au about pro e-sports. The different sects are different gaming teams in this fic. WWX was accused of cheating a few years back and had to leave the Jiang team. LWJ, captain of Lan team, eventually finds WWX again and asks to enter a competition with WWX, and I think together they can pull off some kind of special move in-game that shows they have incredible teamwork or something. The fic reminded me of the danmei novel God Level Summoner, but I think the general theme of “fallen champion player gets back on his feet and wins the league” is pretty common in esports stories. 

NOT FOUND! Love OP Please Nerf by LikeTheTide (T, 13k, WangXian, WIP, Esports, Gamer AU, Modern, Gaming, Mutual Pining, Friends to Lovers, screw top and bottom whos the tank and whos the squishy dps, Slow Burn) Based purely on synopsis, could this be 13?

FOUND! 【为梦想而战】for this dream, i'll fight by paradisetrain (M, 27k, WangXian, JYL/MM, Modern, Gaming, Gamer AU, League of Legends, Video & Computer Games, Gaming Jargon, Social Media, Internet Hate, cancel culture, Hacking, Cheating Scandal, Internet Scandal, Bad Parenting, Parent Death, Loss of Parent(s), Family Issues, Family Feels, Healing, Falling In Love, Threatening unborn babies, Death threats to unborn babies, Blackmail, Implied Incest, Canon Typical Incest, Between JGY and QS, Illegal Activities, The game is League of Legends but with different names, Why do people on the same team all have the same surname?, just because, featuring:, WWX Goes Back to Gusu, WWX's canonical self-worth issues, LWJ's unconditional support of WWX) #13 might be this one - I've not read it, but my bestie says it might be the one.

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14. Hello! I'm looking for a fic that's is a university au, maybe lwj pov? In this fic, lwj is selectively mute and took a semester off from college to learn sign language so that he could communicate solely through that. When he meets wwx and his siblings, they can all speak with him because Madam yu is deaf and they know sign language because of her. I think wangxian meet at a cafe where wwx works? At some point point lwj is forced to make a speaking presentation in on of his classes and he prerecords a video to show in class instead due to his anxiety, also somewhwere in the story jiang cheng helps him through a panic attack. I swear I have looked all over AO3 for this fic, but I haven't been able to find it, so there's a chance it might have been deleted, but I hope you all can help!!!!! @kavlobebeki

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15. Hello, thank you for all your help! I am now looking for a fic where Wei Wuxian was raised as Jiang Cheng's whipping boy. This was a common practice among the gentry except for in the Lan clan. JC grew up and he tried not to do anything that would lead to WWX being whipped in his place but during the Cloud Recesses lectures Jin Zixuan demands WWX be whipped and JC can’t really stop it. Lan Wangji tried to intervene but Lan Qiren held him back saying not to get involved in other sect’s conflict. I think Meng Yao was also a designated whipping boy for Huaisang, possibly all the whipping boys for all the young masters also attended the lectures as manservants? I would love to read this again, if anyone can find it! @gloriousclotpole

FOUND? the price of a home by JemTheKingOfSass (T, 13k, JC & WWX, Whipping Boy AU, Pre-Canon, Canon verse events, TW details in top Notes of any chapter when necessary, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, the price of a home [podfic] by esbielle)

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16. I'm looking for a fic where the Lan are the most powerful sect, or maybe they were royalty, and take over Lotus pier because Lan Wangji thinks Wei Wuxian has very impolitely spurned his marriage proposal, only for it to be revealed that Madam Yu did it. @mullk6

FOUND? Warrior Prince by QteCuttlfish (M, 4k, WangXian, Rape/Non-Con, Threats of Rape/Non-Con, Angst with a Happy Ending, Alpha/Omega, A/B/O, Omega WWX, Alpha LWJ, Implied Mpreg, Not Canon Compliant)

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17. Hi can you help me find a wangxian fic where wei wuxian either runs away after the golden core transfer/did not participate in the war and works at an inn? He ends up finding and rescuing the wens and they work at the inn with him. Then lan wangji found him and so did jiang cheng at the end. @fjcfanatic

FOUND? The Taste of Home by For_the_Love_of_Bichen (E, 49k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Coffee Shops & Cafés, Bar/Pub, inn owner WWX, WWX never learns demonic cultivation, Human WWX, canon compliant up until the golden core removal, set in mdsz world, Fantasy Medical Procedures, Medical Procedures, Golden Core Transfer, Blood and Injury, Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Feels, canonical kinks, Anal Sex,bAnal Fingering, Oral Sex, Bathing/Washing, Dual Cultivation, LWJ & WWX Have a Breeding Kink, WWX Has a Rape/Non-Con Kink, mild cnc kink, mentioned cnc kink, no actual cnc play, Mild Breeding Kink, Drunk LWJ, Additional Warnings In Author's Note, Slow Burn, Possessive LWJ, First Time, LWJ Has a Praise Kink, WWX Has No Golden Core, WWX Has Self-Worth Issues)

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18. Hi, I really hope you find this fic! It was WIP which I found only a few months ago. I think it's Jiang bashing altogether because the last chapter ended with Jiang yanli giving tea to Jiang fengmian saying she will take care of something. I tried the "Jiang yanli is not an angel" tag but I cannot find it. Can you help me with this one please?

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19. For some reason scrolled by this fic when browsing through someone's bookmarks and now cannot remember whose, so must turn to you once again! Time travel by Jin Zixuan. Judging by the summary, I think he comes back to awareness in the middle of the fight with Wei Wuxian at Cloud Recesses; he wonders about the fact that he's sure he was bleeding out just a moment ago, then about the fact that WWX suddenly looks a lot younger but still very angry. @linderel

Had no idea that there would be several fics with that premise but then again, perhaps not surprising! Sadly, none of the three suggested for #19 so far sound right. I'll probably still read them at some point.

additionally, about #19: I'm fairly certain that the summary mentioned JZX bleeding out or something, which none of the suggestions have. I also went back to dig through several authors' bookmarks myself but alas, no luck yet; not even any of the suggested ones has popped up

NOT FOUND 一寸光阴一寸金, 寸金难买寸光阴 by orphan_account (G, 11k, JYL/JZX, JC/WQ, WangXian, WIP, Time Travel Fix-It, JZX Tries, JZX Has Friends, (frenemies really but still), Canon Divergence, Temporary Character Death, JZX-centric, Reconciliation, Everyone Lives, Socially Awkward JZX, Second Chances, Cloud Recesses, Cloud Recesses Study Arc, Cloud Recesses Shenanigans, Pining, JZX can see the love, Matchmaker JZX, did he sign up for this? no but he's gonna try anyways)

NOT FOUND Brittle Steel Slicing Through by meyari (T, 19k, JYL/JZX, WangXian, Major Character Death, Sunshot Campaign, War, aftermath of war, PTSD, Warning: Jin Guangshan, fuck that guy, murder as a method of problem solving, murder as a flirtation method, learning to communicate for idiots, Time Travel Fix-It, Jin Murder-Babies FTW, Fluff and Crack)

NOT FOUND 🔒 Rise of the Peacock by JustAWanderingBabbit (Not Rated, 70k, JZX & JGY, JYL/JZX, 3zun, WIP, Canon Divergence, Re:Birth/Transmigration, Drabble to Full Story, JZX is all grown up in a boy's body, Time to save the world, Or at least save JZX's chest cavity, I just love saving JGY, Definitely NOT Untamed timeline, Reasonably intelligent gamers, The Jin Brothers are a team, Attempted Sexual Assault, unwanted sexual touching)

NOT FOUND With you, I can fight the World by Weiyingbestboy (G, 2k, WangXian, JYL/JZX, JC & WWX & JYL, JZX & WWX, Everyone Lives, Time Travel Fix-It, Canon Divergence, JC is so done, JZX and WWX Friendship)

FOUND! 🔒 long bygone burdens by humancorn (T, 17k, JYL/JZX, JZX & WWX, Time Travel Fix-It, Time Travelling JZX, Pre-Sunshot Campaign, JZX-centric, JZX Tries, JZX & WWX Friendship, Wife Guy JZX, He's doing his best ok, Canon Divergence, mentions of corporal punishment) So none of the fics suggested for #19 were right but I finally braved the search function and found it myself! I think I skipped it because it wasn't Wangxian content 😅 Anyway, it was this

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20. hello! for the next fic finder, i’m looking for a fic where lqr ends up being able to hear wwx’s thoughts. there’s this distinct scene where lqr is traumatized by wwx jerking off to thoughts abt lwj. thank you!!

FOUND! Judge Softly by Chrononautical (E, 32k, WangXian, LSZ & WWX, LXC & LWJ, LXC & LQR, LQR & WWX, Accidental Voyeurism, Masturbation, Non-Consensual Mind Reading, Oblivious WWX, WWX Has Self-Worth Issues, Cloud Recesses, BAMF WWX, Genius WWX, sex makes WWX stupid, LQR Tries, It may be more accurate to say LQR learns to try, Suffering LQR, WangXian Get a Happy Ending, Post-Canon Fix-It, mostly web series with a few influences from the broader canon, Ghosts, Angst with a Happy Ending, Gusu Lan Forehead Ribbon, Teacher LQR Mutual Pining, Longing, Playful Sex, Use Your Words, Canon-Typical Violence, Switching, Virgin WWX, Love Confessions)

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[genericpuff]

bit out of nowhere but LO Hades reminds me so much to Bojack Horseman idk how to explain it

Oh we've talked about this extensively in the ULO chat circles n such, especially when it comes to the most climactic scene in the show, the second interview:

The entire tone of the show showcases a very bitter reality with a lot of celebrities and people in power. There are some messed up things that happen throughout the course of the show, but they always feel like they're being used for comedy or brushed under the rug with comedy, because the show is, after all, a comedy. But I feel like that was the point, because it's not until the final season that everything that happened throughout finally catches up to Bojack, and suddenly... it's not funny anymore. There's no punchline. It really reflects just how much people in power don't see their abuse or wrongdoings as "big deals", sometimes they even see it as "just some funny thing that happened", all while the onlookers and victims of their behavior and abuse either become so acquainted with it they don't even see it as abuse anymore until they finally break away from it (Diana, Todd, Princess Caroline, etc.) OR they fight to be heard while the media tries to snuff them out. So then when the consequences finally catch up to them, there are no laughs to be heard, as much as the perpetrator in question may try their best to pass it off as "not a big deal" or believe they shouldn't be held accountable because "it happened a long time ago".

Anyone who sees Biscuits Braxby as the villain here is missing the overall point - Bojack has been responsible for literally ruining people's lives on several occasions, and has never been held accountable.

And yeah, I see a lot of that in LO as well, but the issue is the framing of the story isn't making it clear if it's actually going to have its "Come to Jesus" moment with Hades and Persephone, or if it's just gonna keep celebrating them as the heroes.

There were no consequences for Hades pulling out Alex's eye. They played the resolution out for comedy.

There were no consequences for Persephone turning Minthe into a mint plant. They played the scenario out for comedy literally by the end of the very same episode and then well into the next one.

There were no consequences for Persephone cornering Tori at his job. The entire thing was played up for comedy.

There were no consequences for Persephone raiding Leuce's home. She was rewarded with sex from Hades and it was, you guessed it, played up for comedy.

Just like with Bojack Horseman, we don't see Hades or Persephone treat these situations as seriously as they ought to. They ultimately don't care how other people feel or how they may be affected by their own actions, they only care about themselves. Just like with Bojack, we see Hades enter sexual relationships with women who are in a much weaker position than him, women who stand to lose far more than he would if the relationship went south.

(I need you all to realize that Hades is literally blackmailing her. He is trying to pay her off with a management position or some kind of severance and framing it in such a way to manipulate her into thinking it's 'better' for her that she take the deal, all for the sake of getting her out of the picture because he's with Persephone now. This is blackmail. And the narrative wants us to root for Hades here.)

Shit, I would argue Bojack is still a better character than Hades and Persephone because we 1.) see how the consequences of his actions do affect him on a deeper level (through his anxiety and self-hatred which he spends a long time wallowing in, making his situation worse, rather than seeking help for) and 2.) he actually does eventually start to seek help, but unfortunately there's only so much one person can do to fix themselves when their actions still haven't been brought to justice and their mindset hasn't truly changed; which is what we see in the final part of the show when, despite Bojack's attempts to be a better person, the Sarah-Lynn case catches up to him, and in his final moments up on that stage with Biscuits Braxby, we see his true nature come out - he thinks being an addict should absolve him from what he's done to others.

Sounds familiar, doesn't it? Except replace "addict" with "traumatized" as many of Persephone and Hades' actions are swept under the rug with "they went through trauma so it's fine". Despite the fact that other characters who have also been through trauma aren't given that same grace (Thanatos, Demeter, Minthe, etc.)

You could also go a step further and call out how the fans themselves will defend their actions as "but they're gods!!! gods were terrible all the time in the myths!" but isn't it funny how myth accuracy only ever comes up when it comes to defending Hades and Persephone? Meanwhile you'll never see anyone bring it up when it comes to Apollo SA'ing Persephone, or Hades having an emotional affair with Persephone, or any of the other number of things that Rachel rewrote for her 'retelling'. It's not funny haha, it's funny yikes.

I can only imagine how the fans feel seeing Hades and Persephone called out must be similar to how first-time viewers like myself felt seeing Bojack be put on the cross by Biscuits Braxby - "you're being an asshole, he's working on himself!" "leave him alone!!!" "the media is making a monster out of him!" "he's really not THAT bad!"

But he is. They are. And unlike Bojack Horseman, I unfortunately can no longer have the good faith in believing Hades and Persephone will have their comeuppance, or the people they've hurt will get their retribution. I have no hope that Persephone will see that she's the Sarah-Lynn of the relationship, a girl who was groomed into an abuser at the hands of an abuser, who had no chance of doing better because the person she fell for pulled her down to his level. I don't have any faith in Rachel whatsoever that she'll manage to end this story with any message besides "it's fine for Persephone and Hades to be who they are, because they're rich and powerful and really horny for each other!"

And Hades doesn't think he has any power over women.

[periprose]

Okay I gotta request something JUST HEAR ME OUT

Black Cat!Reader trying to tell Tasm!Peter she's Black Cat while he tries to tell her that he's Spider-Man at the same time. Queue up Peter being baffled, while reader just doesn't believe him lol

Also I am loving Florence, it's so good and rich, I'm still only on chapter three but I want to kiss your Peter senseless- he's such a sweetheart🫶 Also I love youuu🥰

AHHH bby i love this idea and I love you!! (also thanks for the support on florence)

/

Secrets are difficult to reveal.

They're especially terrible when you're telling something so tumultuous to your best friend, something that could either make him judge you severely or run away from you.

How do you confess that you're a thief? An villain turned anti-hero?

Even worse, Peter is someone you really love. Someone you know is too good for you- he would never feel the same way. But that's why you have Spider-Man, right?

You always knew it wasn't always going to be fun and games to be Black Cat. To be the very symbol of bad luck- it's a bad premonition.

You stare in the mirror. Peter will be here any second- he always climbs up the fire escape into your apartment's bedroom, and you told him you had something important to say.

There's a knock at your window, and you turn a little too abruptly.

Peter watches from the outside. He has a tentative smile, but he can see that you're worried, and you make the conscious effort to relax your face.

Peter himself is worried. He's about to confess something very important to someone very near and dear to him- he's Spider-Man, and not just that- he's having a sort-of affair with Black Cat.

He doesn't even know how it happened. First she was stealing wealth from banks, then a few months later she came with him with the notion to be good, and Peter always believes in someone redeeming themselves... but that doesn't mean she had to be so goddamn hot, all black leather and white fur, and Peter's just a horny dude who could not help but kiss back when she made a move on him yesterday.

And it was hot, it was good for him to take out some very human emotions by making out with her, but it wasn't everything. It wasn't you, and now he feels incredibly guilty. So he wants to come clean. Peter wants to let you know the whole truth, and even if that means you'll never like him again- Peter will never act on his unspoken feelings for you- he knows you deserve to know.

"Hey." You let Peter in, and he immediately walks in with an air of anxiety, hands already shaking as he paces around. "You good?"

"Uh, yeah. Yeah." Peter shakes his head immediately. "No, not really. We need to talk."

"Oh." You give him a look as you sit on your bed. "You have something to say, too?"

Peter nods, and you think it can't be nearly as bad as what you're going to tell him.

"Okay. Let me go first- I've been hiding something from you." He starts, but you shake your head. "I haven't been around."

"I haven't been around, Peter." You tilt your head at him. "I... I haven't been telling you the truth."

"Just wait. I'm trying to tell you something important." Peter insists, wanting you to know the truth but you keep going.

"I'm a bad person, Peter." You murmur, and Peter stops, interest piqued. "I've been misusing our friendship- you wouldn't want to be friends if you knew my past."

"No. That's not true." Peter sits down next to you on your bed, feeling that he should comfort you before potentially breaking your heart. "I'll always be your friend. Tell me what's going on."

"Don't sound so sure." You grimace at him. "I... I'm Black Cat."

"Huh?"

"I know, it's so terrible. I stopped with all the stealing and killing, but... I'm still not sure if my so-called good deeds are enough to forgive me." You lean over your legs. "I don't... I work with Spider-Man every now and then, too."

"But-" Peter tries to interject, and you keep going anyways. He's incredibly baffled- it's not that you don't match the size of Black Cat, it's just that he's sure he would've recognized your mouth under her mask. He's fantasized about your lips long enough.

"He kissed me yesterday." You admit, and for some reason it feels like a slap in the face to say, even if you know that Peter doesn't actually like you like that. "And I've always liked you, Peter, so I just have to get this off my chest, because I feel so terrible. I'm sorry."

Peter is snickering.

"What?" You shove him. "I'm trying to tell you about my actual, serious pain, Peter, and you're just laughing-"

He loves this. He can actually be with you, no questions asked, and you have to be Black Cat- who else would know that Spider-Man kissed you? Peter feels a little bad that you're clearly agonized about it still, and he is laughing, but he can't help it.

"I was trying to tell you the same thing." Peter shrugs, as you hang onto his every word. "Okay, not the same thing. But that I'm Spider-Man."

You raise your eyebrows. "Really?"

"What do you mean, really? What's so shocking?" Peter asks, somewhat affronted, still finding it funny. "Do I not look like I have Spider-Man's build?"

"No, no. It just... feels a little too convenient." You give him a pitiful glance. "Maybe you could prove it?"

"Wow." Peter shakes his head, stifling a small smile. "Why would I lie?"

"No, Peter, it's not that you would lie. It's just... it's too obvious of a happy ending for me, and I-" You wince. "I don't normally have those."

"Oh." Peter knows about your past, your unhappy origin story, and he doesn't want to say anything to negate that truth.

So he simply thwips out a web towards your desk, planting your water bottle against the wall, and you don't look too surprised, although you do inhale.

"So that means- I was working with- and you-" You try to make a coherent sentence. "We... we kissed?"

"Tell me if this feels the same." Peter murmurs, half jokingly, mostly serious, and he pulls your face up in the same way you remember he did yesterday.

Knowing that you were the one in that leather black suit with the white trimming stirs something more inside him- yeah, he loves you and he's so glad to have you here now- but it makes yesterday even hotter in hindsight.

No mask this time. Nothing to get in the way of you dragging your fingers through Peter's hair as he presses his lips against yours, not hesitant at all. His lips are firm, plying against yours, and he inhales in a way that screams that he's wanted to do this for a while- even if he kissed you a few days ago, it wasn't like this- and it has you understanding he doesn't want to be gentle. He wants to finish what he started.

[mooshs-crack-headcanons]

Hi can you do headcanons for Levi, Eren, and Armin with a reader who has cardiophobia and gets really panicky/emotional after sex ^^. I would really appreciate it.

:)

Disclaimer/Reminder: NSFW works with the 104th will always be set after the times timeskip where they are adults. With that being said, Eren is... post timeskip Eren, so not the most 'adjusted' or the romantic as you might've liked. You know, tragic hero falls and knowingly becomes the thing he hated most and becomes the villain and dwells on it shenanigans.

(General neutral reader)

(Very light NSFW contents given subject matter below the cut)

Levi Ackerman

Like mentioned here, Levi has complications feelings with sex in general for the longest time until after he gets into a comfortable place doing it a couple times with you so he knows the feeling. However, during those first few times it's moreso during than after with him that you have to ease him more into relaxing when he gets cagey or overwhelmed with the feels™ you can be his rock to ground and comfort him through it. So if you get similar feels post sex it's only fair for him to do the same for you, right?

You will have to thoroughly explain it to him exactly what you're feeling it going through though - even if in the moment it might be a bit hard, so maybe bring it up beforehand? If not in the moment that first time he's going to automatically assume the worst and think he's hurt you and bad past shit is going to flare back up - again, sex is a complicated subject for Levi - and he's going to insist you two never do this again unless you can properly explain that it's nothing but just an anxiety thing and that you're fine, it's nothing to do with him and he didn't hurt you and you would actually like to do it again. He's going to hesitate a bit but he trusts you - he wouldn't be here with you right now if he didn't - if you really say you're okay and everything's fine he'll believe you. He's careful with you, especially like this an emotional wreck on his bed, but he'll still believe you and try to focus on what you need now.

It takes a couple attempts to get into a steady rhythm and healthy pattern, while during sex Levi learns more about how to be more vulnerable loosing himself with you after you both learn what it takes for you to be as comfortable as possible afterwards.

Do you need space? After collecting himself - kissing you one last time if you're comfortable - he'll completely vacate your space and drift off a bit somewhere else. Depending on how much space you need, he can either retreat to a corner of the room and talk with (or at if that helps) you there or he can get completely dressed and go shower - if he comes back out and you're still in need of space, he can then go back out to his office and make himself busy with some of the hundreds of piles of busy work shit Erwin has him to do until whenever you are comfortable enough to go out and seek him again. Either way he's always respectful of you maybe wanting to be alone to recollect yourself.

Do you need constant affection? Or reassuring comfort? He can do that. He doesn't think he's very good at it (he very much is) but he'll try. Once you've made it clear by eloping your arms and/or legs around him like you'll never let go and bury your face in the crook of his neck, he'll slightly return it by having a stern grip around you - once he's more comfortable with the dynamic even coming up to trace his fingers along your body or even play with your hair if you're comfortable. You need kisses? He'll give them. You need to just hear him talk about anything? He can pull the most random shit out of his ass to complain about. More specific but you want to hear a story from him? He's limited because half the shit isn't very comforting or appropriate for this setting to try and calm you down, plus given how you're here in the first place he's told you all of it, but he does manage to come up with a couple 'fun' stories, usually involving Isabel - she was a fun person, his fun kid sister.

Like the time in the small apartment he used to live in with Kenny before he left and then lived in with her and Farlan, he went to go discover the source of a smell in the attic that overlooked Isabel's room one night and discovered the source was a leaking wine barrel and not even five seconds after making the discover and was he about to move it to assess the floor damage did an ODM wire break through from up the floor and through the barrel and shot up past his ear until everything fell around him and he crashed to the floor below covered head to toe in wine and where Isabel loudly spewed off about some kind of 'monster' while wielding her blades in her nightwear until the dust settled and the 'monster' was revealed to be Levi. He remembers it was just as Farlan stepped in to see what the hell was going on that he got so mad at her, which looking back now on he definitely wishes he didn't yell at her the way he did but they didn't have the money to make such the repairs to the house now with the giant gaping hole in Isabel's bedroom... but they ended up pinning down a large blanket to the hole as their 'solution', it definitely didn't help during winter nights or when rats from the attic would fall through the cracks and onto Isabel while she slept giving her nightmares for weeks... and here he was making the story depressing again, he hates when he always does that without realizing - but cuddled up next to him you tell him it's fine, in a way it shows how much he cared about his adopted family even despite all the depressing hardships they went through.

No matter what he's always willing to make changes and adjustments for you to suit and help with your current needs, after all you do the same for him when he needs it so besides him genuinely wanting to it's only fair as he sees it. He loves you, like actually genuinely loves you and you mean the world to him, you two wouldn't even be here to experience this dilemma in the first place if he didn't. If you can make adjustments and changes for him to deal with his whole complicated struggles he's more than happy to do the same for you.

Eren Jeager

Already somewhat aware of it before you two even fuck in the first place. Being said, Eren at this point in time is aware of a lot of things but always chooses to keep them to himself. He has to. After all, there's no point. Everything is leading to one place. No matter what. There's no point. He's going to hell in less than year anyway for the tragedy he's going to make occur. You're nothing but a temporary distraction from that. Hell he doesn't even know if you're going to survive it. You might. Or might not. Either way he's going to be dead before he can even figure that fact out. Mikasa is going to kill him in the end - he knows that much. Nothing he does now matters, that diplomacy meeting just proved that. They are going to one future. No matter what. Eighty percent. Eighty damn percent. He's going to hell and he's going to rot there, he knows that.

You're a temporary distraction. He tells himself that over and over. He'll fuck you and leave. Not even taking the time to really watch your emotional reaction afterwards, if you need space and need to be alone then it's not much of an issue - hell, he's actually helping you but it still hurts with how cold-hearted he forces himself to be. If you need comfort and affection you're completely shit out of luck. You are a temporary distraction. Over and over he reminds himself. Will you be a part of that eighty percent? He doesn't want to think about it. So he doesn't think about it so he doesn't pit your emotions in consideration... at least for awhile.

His younger version of himself still in him is very stubborn. His old emotions he use to feel are very stubborn - biting him at the worst possible times. He ignores it - tries to. But it's at the absolute worst when it's around you.

If he were that dumb kid - hell himself a year or two ago - he would've taken immediate action to comfort you in the best way he could. He would've stayed and been there for you, comforted you if you needed it. If he were that same puppy lovesick kid he would've done anything for you, he would mold and do anything for your needs. He would put all your emotions and feelings into consideration and in account. You mean so much to him, if only he had the courage to tell you that before the Truth hit him all in the face with that one Touch of That hand. Maybe a sick twisted part of him wishes that connection moment seeing the horrific future He would create never would've happened and he could have lived in ignorant bliss, he could've been happy with you and all his friends. But the future leads all one way, he reminds himself. No matter what. Eighty percent.

But as time get closer, he looses up a bit. Let's himself have a moment of respite and selfishness he knows he doesn't deserve. The one time he either doesn't immediate leave or goes only far enough of a comfortable distance from you but still able to speak to you as he sits across the room. He doesn't talk, even if you want him to. But he'll sit there either next to you on the bed for you to hesitantly cling onto him or he'll sit by the windowsill and just stare outside. But he'll stay there. Unlike before.

You can talk if you want, he won't stop you. Talk about whatever through choked out sobs and struggled breaths and he'll listen. He doesn't know why he's letting himself but he does, even still he likes hearing your voice.

If you're beside him you can touch him if you want, his longer hair is very soft and his hands are surprisingly very smooth and delicate against your skin - probably from the constant new layers of molded over skin from his transformations. He'll let you do whatever you want except he won't outright touch you in return. He won't let himself.

If he's across the room staring out the window however, he will actually speak. But he does so without ever looking at you. He'll tell you stories about his childhood, tales about Mikasa and Armin, how really important they are to him, how he liked you for so long but was a coward to never be able to say it until too late, and how it fucking hurts him knowing what all you and them are going to be put through when he's finally gone past the point of no return - but you never for some reason remember that part. Not until after the dust has settled after the Battle of Heaven and Earth. There's a lot of things you don't remember him saying to you until after he's gone.

Then rationality sets back in. He wants you to find someone else, someone else you can properly attune and care for your complex needs - someone that's not him. You do mean too much to him. He's not deserving of that. He's not deserving of having you share such vulnerabilities with him. He's not deserving of your tender emotions. You two can't do this anymore. He wants you to hate him for the evil he's going to do. The future only leads one way. And he's not going to be a part of yours.

Eighty percent.

Armin Arlert

Literally so understanding and accommodating. Once you tell him about your anxieties and with up to date medical knowledge books from Marley he's actually able to find the scientific term for it and uses those books as somewhat of a blueprint to try and maneuver through it the best way possible.

However, he actually overwhelms himself however overlyworrying that you're uncomfortable with talks a mile a minute asking suggestions of the things he's read to a point it actually distracts you for a brief moment that it's actually cute seeing him like this and you'll have to flat out tell him exactly what you need or he'll go on and on for hours without even realizing he's doing so and that could potentially overwhelm you too and make things worse and you obviously don't want that. So it's best to be blunt and forward about it, he'll do anything you suggest and give you as much space as you want or as much less space as you want if you need to be held.

Once you're all situated and on the verge of be more calmer now (or at least on the road to be) Armin becomes less stressed about worrying over you now that he sees you bit by bit slowly easing out. He's either as far or close as you want him but he still makes sure to check on you, asking simple yes or no questions you can answer with a simple head nod or shake until he's completely satisfied that you're okay.

If you need it quiet, he can stay quiet, either petting along the small of your back and/or pressing a couple kisses to the top of your head as you still lay naked on top him if comfortable and if close enough. Or - and he can do this both is farther away in the set aside chair at his desk or right next to you in bed - he can read to you, he loves reading to you. His voice is so calming when he reads and it can settle as a very good distraction to help shove away any remainder nerves and uneased emotions.

He'll read your favorite books but also from a couple his parents left behind to him as a kid that he still keeps, he loves reading those to you especially given how much they mean to him. His grandpa use to read them to him before bed too, but he tries not to think about even in the dead of night while he stared aimlessly at the ceiling still (sleep was a very hard thing to do after Maria fell) he could hear his Grandpa's cries from downstairs in the shotty house they rented. The book was the only thing he had left of his daughter - Armin's mother - after all, so they obviously meant a lot to him too, increasing their value more. To read them to you means a lot, even in a situation like these.

He can also talk about other things though if you want, Armin is a busy guy with all sorts of future things potentially planned and honestly he'll appreciate it if you're comfortable and willing to let him ramble on about his plans and ideas for the Peace Diplomacy and other important Commander things of the sort to pick at his brain for a bit. You don't have to pitch in or offer anything to it but if you do it's always considered and appreciated. And it doesn't just have to be about strictly professional stuff either, it can be about anything you want it to be. But things can tend to dampen the mood if the past gets brought of given... everything. Speaking of you two really need to go visit Mikasa soon...

It doesn't matter how much of a mess you're in Armin will always pick back up your pieces, no matter how long or how much time it takes to pick them back up. He'll kiss away your tears and ease your stress away time and time again however you need it. No matter what or however long, he'll do it until death takes him and he reunites with Eren in hell. That's a promise.

If you like what you read please consider reblogging! It means the world for writers and artists!

[sourpatchys]

Title: Thorns’n Roses

Rating: NSFW❤️‍🔥 minors DNI

Warning: premature ejaculation

Time: after overhaul, before Deika City

Word count: 4.5k

Summary: The beating of two hearts can finally become one. The realization of feelings, and the fear of separation. •FEMALE READER•

The warehouse was cold, its broken down walls and caved in floors left much to be desired in the thought of comfort. Though, as being in the league has taught you– it could always be worse.

Even with the cracked windows, boarded up doorways and splinter infested surfaces, this was a far cry from the worst place you’d had to call home within these past few months. At the very least this place had a few broken down mattresses that had been left by fellow squatters over the years– a good change of pace from sleeping on leaves and concrete.

Though, through it all– you couldn’t think of a place you’d rather be. The dripping water and old creaks left you feeling calm, the cold air soothed your hot skin– this was the life you’d chosen, and it was a beautiful reality. Someday, maybe the world would allow you to be like the others, to perhaps build a life worth slowing down for, but that dream was far away– just beyond your reach.

The league mostly stayed separate, going alone or in pairs to the next location to help cease wandering eyes from staring too long. Fugitives couldn’t risk being recognized, as a whole it was safer to go alone, meeting up with Shigaraki once every few days to decide our next move.

As luck would have it, you were with Shigaraki this week. Kurogiri liked to say it was for the sake of the leader's protection– but you knew otherwise. The truth was, Tomura Shigaraki was the league's protection, a safety blanket for the unknown. He always had the answers, he always had a plan– and when he didn't we knew it simply wasn’t time to act. Truth be told, he was the reason you stayed.

Being a villain wasn't on your bingo card, it wasn’t something you ever thought you would have chosen for yourself– being on the run wasn’t something that was new for you though, and that's how he’d found you– crying in an alleyway after losing control, afraid of what you were capable of.

He made you realize there was no reason to be afraid– that fighting back was a part of life. Those exact words had never left his lips, in fact he rarely spoke to you at all, his mere presence and demeanor were enough to make you understand the lessons you were taught.

Shigaraki was never afraid to do what he wanted– needed to do. So you decided you wouldn’t be either.

He was sitting on an old shipping box, staring into space– his eyes weren’t focused, it seemed as if he was letting himself rest after weeks of fighting. Something in you wanted to believe that you had given him his relaxation– that you had somehow saved him from his anxieties just by being there.

Finally, he turned to you, his eyes harsh, yet somehow forgiving all the same. They were red like rubys, like two crystal clear seas of blood– or perhaps like a rose, covered in thorns, ready for its next victim.

It was as if you were possessed, like the words left your mouth without even processing through your own skull– “Your eyes are really pretty.”

He looked just as shocked as you felt, his brows raising and then falling, showing you more of his beautiful red.

“What?”

His voice was shaken, a tone in which you had never heard from him– it wasn’t anger, it wasn’t fury– he was confused, upset even. Maybe you needed to say it again? Surly he just hadn’t heard you right the first time.

“I said your eyes– they’re pretty.”

This didn't seem to cure his new demeanor. He was supposed to have all the answers– but at this moment, it was as if he’d never had a correct answer in his life. He didn't know what to say, where to look, or how to continue. Yet something in him yearned to keep this going, he wanted to hear you again, the sincerity in your voice had him crumbling in a way he never knew possible.

“Yours are too.”

He’d never given another person a compliment, he wasn’t sure if he had even done it right. If not for the slight flush on your face, he may never have gotten the answer. His body felt hot, his hands were sweating and he swore his heart was beating twice as fast. It was similar to anger in a way– though he didn't wish for this feeling to stop, he didn't crave the crash of emotions he got after killing, or the need to scratch. It was a strange sensation, and he was sure you were trying to kill him– but he couldn’t find it in himself to care.

You were just the same, three seconds away from a heart attack. You were sure you'd heard him wrong, but the softness in his rose like eyes told you otherwise, and suddenly you were melting in the palm of his hands. It felt as though he had all five of his fingers wrapped against your throat, and you craved more of the delicious feeling. You were pudding, but you felt brave, braver than you ever had in your 20 years of life.

“They remind me of a newly blossomed rose after a storm, so beautiful and yet so dangerous you can’t help but want to pluck it for yourself.”

A thoughtful look crossed his face as he stared at you, as if he were digesting your words bit by bit, savoring the flavor on his tongue.

“Beautiful, huh?”

“Yes, I think so.”

It was then he stood, walking his way towards you before sitting down across from you on the cold damp floor. He seemed to be examining you, looking for something he couldn’t quite place.

“Are you trying to get under my skin? It wont work.” he lied– as far as he was concerned you were nestled right into the muscle.

You swallowed, this was as close as you'd ever had the pleasure of being to one another, you didn’t want to push him away.

“No Shigaraki, I'm just being honest.”

He glared at you, his eyes showing distrust, though a pale blush started to form across his neck. A part of you wondered if his ears got red when he was embarrassed– you desperately wanted to find out.

“So you honestly think I'm ‘beautiful’.”

The word was spit out of his mouth with such disgust, you almost didn't recognize it– as if it were completely foreign to your vocabulary. Though his utter repulsion for the word did not make your statement any less true, in fact it only made you want to drill it harder, to see him accept your thoughts on the matter no matter the cost.

“Yes–” you reached out your hand, touching your soft subtle flesh across his scarred rough skin, looking into his soul– “I think you're beautiful.”

Shigaraki didn’t know how to react, he didn't know how to do anything. It was as if he had lost complete connection to his body, only able to stare, basking in the warmth you've given him. His body is frigid, long since forgetting the feeling of a gentle touch– he thought he may become addicted to the feeling now that it was in his grasp once more.

Noticing his reluctance, you moved to sit on your knees– slowly, so as to not startle him further– you placed your other hand on the other side of his warming face. It felt as though you had the world in your hands, and you found yourself loving the feeling it gave you.

Was that what this was? Affection?

The thought of closing the gap between your bodies made you shiver with excitement, and then– and only then– could you handle the truth.

You were in love with Tomura Shigaraki.

The man in question was in confused bliss, he never knew the touch of another could feel so– innocent– so subtle. He wanted more, he wanted every part of you– anything you'd let him have, he decided he would take.

“Shigaraki?” you whispered, refusing to speak any louder, afraid of losing the bubble you had so carefully crafted together.

He hummed at you, his eyes tracing every corner of your face– making sure to confine it to his memories. This moment was one he refused to forget.

“Can I try something?”

As if he knew what your simple request was, he stared down to your lips– flicking his unfocused gaze between them and your eyes– silently giving you permission to continue, letting you take the lead.

As your soft lips grazed his own, he found that he never wanted to feel anything else. He couldn’t close his eyes, much too enthralled by the soft look on your face, a look of content in which he never assumed he would be on the other end of.

He realized that maybe– he didn’t hate everything. No– he could never hate you, nor the feelings you were giving him.

The kiss was short and sweet, only lasting a few seconds before you were pulling away, looking for his reaction, nervous about what you might find. You didn't have much time to look however, as soon he was wrapping his arm around your head, sure not to touch you with his deadly fingers, drawing you to his mouth once more.

This kiss was not soft, though it was enthralling just the same. Your mouths moved in sync, quickly finding a rhythm only the two of you would ever be able to share. It was filthy, sloppy, untamed– but it was perfect all the same.

Tomura’s rough lips slid against your own, you couldn’t think of any kiss you'd ever shared feeling as wonderful as this– you felt as though your world was finally spinning again, as though the last piece to your puzzle had been clicked into place.

You made him feel alive. Like nothing in this world could hurt him any longer.

Breaking the kiss was one of the hardest tasks either of you had ever faced up to that point. The need to stay connected, to feel the others skin across their own– it was a pull unlike any other. Shigaraki looked at you with a gaze you had never seen before, one of contentment. You had done it– you'd relaxed his entire being all on your own. You brought that side of him out– you and you alone.

The look of your face, glossed over eyes and puffy lips, stirred something in Shigaraki, he never wanted anyone to see you the way that he was seeing you, he wanted this for him and him alone.

The tension was thick, yet bubbly all the same, each of you wanted the same thing– each other. And yet the words had escaped both of your throats, unable to be spoken freely.

You leaned in, resting your head in the crook of his neck, your breath was still coming in waves, seemingly unable to recover. He let you, wrapping his arms around you in a protective stance. Even without the words being spoken, the fate was sealed– you belonged to Tomura Shigaraki.

Moments that felt like hours passed without a word, the dripping of the building and the harsh wind outside being the only noise keeping the two of you centered.

Shigarakis throat bobbed as he cleared his throat, the warmth under his skin reaching your cheek in record time.

“I think you are too.”

It took you a moment to understand his words– sitting up and looking at his flushed face, you couldn't help but allow a soft smile to spread across your face. He looked away from you, overcome with the need to hold you once more. It was overwhelming, all of this at once, he wasn't sure what he'd do if you looked at him with those same eyes every time he got to see you.

Suddenly it hit him– after this week, there was no telling where you'd be stationed. You couldn’t stay with him long term, the risk of being found was too great– fanning out and changing location was the only way to stay out of the light– to be hidden in the shadows in a world full of light.

He found his heart aching at the thought– he had only just realized his affections, he had only just felt your soft tender skin on his own, he couldn’t bear being away from you– he was selfish, it had gotten him into trouble many times– and yet now he had to think of your safety as well.

Surly you'd be safest with him, not alone, not with one of the other members– with him.

As the days began to pass, each more attentive than the last, he couldn’t help but continue to worry. He needed everything to be in place, he needed you to stay with him, to be with him always.

He began treasuring your mornings together, watching you open your sleep-ridden eyes, hearing you mumble nonsense while you were dreaming– the feel of your lips on his skin, the touch of your hands, the feeling of your warmth as you hugged him tight.

One day you had woken before him, and he had the pleasure of waking to the sound of your beautiful voice humming sweet nothings as you traced abstract patterns over his back.

The two of you had created something wonderful, a domestic piece of bliss in their otherwise gruesome line of work. You grounded him in a way he never thought was possible, you made him feel whole. While with you– he knew no hate– he knew not anger. All he knew was your warmth, your laugh, your smile.

Oh how he wanted to keep it forever, tucked away in his pocket to carry with him always.

It was as if you were a porcelain doll, and he was doing everything in his power to keep you from breaking. He had never known seeing another person happy to be alive could be so invigorating.

This morning was unlike the others, as it was possibly the last morning you'd get to spend together until a better arrangement could be made– the thought of you leaving his arms even for a moment made him sick to his stomach. He was hoping, with everything in him, that the power that Kurogiri had promised him would come soon, he needed to be the king, with you his queen.

He fell hard and he fell fast, as did you. The bond you shared was unlike any other– you needed one another– you craved one another.

He felt your body begin to twitch as you began to wake, your tender loving hands gripped onto his shirt, and your face scrunched pushing its way into his dark clothing– trying subconsciously to block the sun, annoyed by its rays.

He found it to be quite amusing.

“The sun is here to stay.” he found himself saying, enjoying the way you groaned in frustration towards his words.

“Kill it.”

That got a genuine laugh out of him– his own personal ball of sunshine being such a grumpy riser, it was nothing if not poetic.

He leaned down to kiss your forehead, an action that had become more than natural by this point, he always had his grubby little hands on you one way or another.

You hummed softly at his attempts to wake you– your eyes opening softly, ready to greet the day albeit reluctantly. You weren't happy about leaving either, it had been on your mind since the moment you shared your first kiss together. The fear of leaving the man in which you held so dear. But perhaps the distance would make your connection grow stronger– perhaps the world wasn't ready for the two of you to forever join together quite just yet.

You could feel yourself frowning at the thought, clutching harder onto the fabric between your fingers.

Shigaraki didn't say anything, letting you feel whatever you needed too, though he didn't enjoy your frustrations, he couldn’t solve them– not yet– not without power.

He felt as your warm tired– angry– hand made its way under his worn down shirt, slinking its way up his torso. His breath hitched at the feeling, though he stayed still, letting you do as you pleased. What kind of king would he be if he told his queen no?

Your hand continued to make its way over his pale harsh skin, his muscles tightening under your soft skin, unused to the feeling, yet craving more– he wanted you, he wanted to eat you whole and leave nothing left– to claim your flesh as his own, so that no matter where you wound up, his touch would stay with you forever.

You wanted just the same.

“Tomura?”

His name fell from your lips like lace, he was sure he’d never heard such a beautiful sound. He gulped, afraid of breaking the trance you were in, wanting nothing more than to stay in the moment you had created.

“Yeah?”

“Can I do something?”

The vibrations that shook his core were nothing if not violent. Your voice was as sweet as velvet, your mock innocence made him want to beg, to plead for you to do whatever you wanted, so long as it involved him and no one else. You were beautiful, looking up into his rose colored eyes through your eyelashes, waiting patiently for his answer– for his permission.

Who was he to refuse you?

“Of course.”

That's all it took for your soft, gentle hand to become harsh and demanding, running its way up his torso as if it belonged to you. You sat up, taking no time at all to put both of your precious hands on his frame, sliding away at his overworn shirt, pushing it above his head.

His breathing had all but stopped, giving you utter control over what you were going to do to him next– after all, he had given you his explicit permission to do as you pleased– he wasn't the kind of man to go back on his word.

You traced patterns along his rib cage, sliding your thumbs against his scars, paying special attention to the old healed over bullet wounds from his first endeavor as a full fledged villain. He never paid much mind to his scars, he felt natural about them– they were simply the results of his labor, something that was to be expected if he were to fight for destruction. Though, with your gentle caresses, he found himself awed by them, wishing he had more to show, just for your eyes to see.

It was only when you dipped your head and licked a ling stripe up his stomach that he truly realized what your intentions were– it scared him, it enthralled him– he wanted more.

As your fingers made their way to the hem of his pantline, he propped his body up on his arms, not willing to look away from you for a single second as you popped open his button and rolled down his zipper.

His body was electric, zapping and zipping from his toes up to his head. He could feel himself growing erect, the thought alone of you wishing to touch him had him groaning. The sight before him was one he would never forget, your lovely eyes widening as you released his cock from its confines.

Before touching him, you had to ask a question that had been eating away at you– a question you hoped you already knew the answer to.

You looked up into his glossed over eyes, his mouth slightly agape as he took you in.

“Have you ever done this before Tomura?”

There it was again, the sound of his name falling from your perfect lips, it sent a shockwave down his core, his cock twitching in excitement for what was to come– but you had asked him a question– a question he needed to answer before you would continue your mission.

“No– you're the only one.”

It was true, as of today you had been his first everything, his first kiss, his first crush, love, want. You alone held this unstoppable power over his being. It didn't frighten him nearly as much as it should have.

A smile rose to your face, it was a true smile, a toothy grin that had his heart pounding. How? How in the midst of seducing him– did you manage to make his heart melt?

You went to continue, dropping your hand down to grasp his throbbing member in your hands, he hissed at the new sensation– he’d never expected just a small gesture to unwind him so fully. He knew, if you continued on with your plans he would be gone before long, unable to keep up with your alluring ways– completely undone by your soft warm hands.

“Wait!” he growled, placing his hand over your own, sure to lift his pinkie even as his cogs were unwinding. He wanted to become one with you, he wanted to claim you– to take the reins, to pleasure you thoroughly.

Surprised, you did as told– stopping completely in your tracks, ready to hear your orders.

“I– I won't be able to last like this, I want you. I want you in full.”

His tone was dangerous, like a hunter to its prey– it sent a shock of warmth down to your own heat, a sensation that's never happened with words alone.

He took you and flipped your positions, your body landing on the old squeaky mattress with a puff, immediately spreading your legs, unable to contain yourself after seeing the look in those rose red eyes.

Shigaraki climbed over you, his cock hanging between your bodies, glistening with precum already– unable to control itself at the sight of you submitting to him so easily. He needed you, he needed your wet head to surround him– that's the only way he could die happy– he was sure of it.

“Take them off.”

He tugged two of his fingers against your clothes, unwilling to risk the thought of destroying such beautiful garments that hugged your frame so wonderfully.

The edge and shake to his voice had you trembling in anticipation, ready to bend to his every whim. Slowly you began to pull off your clothing piece by piece, all the while he couldn't look away. Your breasts gleamed with the sun's opposing rays, your nipples erect from the cold air around you– it was a sight to behold– a sight just for him. He was sure then– that if there had been anyone else before him– hed make you forget every single one of them– he’d tear them apart limb from limb. No living being other than him was allowed to see what lay underneath.

As you removed your underwear, he swore he was salivating, your wonderfully crafted thighs shaking, your glistening folds out in the open for his viewing pleasure. He couldn't stop himself from running his finger up and down your damp slit, basking in the realization that he made you that way.

You gasped at his touch, arching your back in a silent beg for more.

“You like when I touch you?” he chuckled, rounding your clit with his calloused thumb- you borderline screamed at the feeling, nodding your head frantically. He continued with his assault, his middle finger making its way to your dripping entrance, teasing the area as he basked in the sound of your cries.

“Please, Tomura– please touch me!”

It was a pitiful wine, and if you weren’t in such an out of bodied state you may have even been embarrassed, though for the moment you were just thankful, because you could feel his finger pressing its way into your folds, wiggling itself around until tit found the perfect spot– the spot that had you seeing stars in the middle of the day.

His hand was fast, fucking you with purpuse, making sure to hit the spot that had you squealing over and over again, unwilling to let up.

“Say it again– say my name again.” he was right by your ear, kissing up and down your throat, using his teeth to bite and suck on any spot he found worthy of his affection.

“Tomura!” you cried, fucking yourself down on his hand as he added another finger.

“Again!” he growled, biting into your throat, making sure to leave the impression of his teeth behind, unwilling to stop until he suited you properly marked as his.

“TOMURA!” you screamed as a flood of pleasure erupted into your body popping just as soon as it arrived– your body jerking as tears ran down your face, unable to hold in the pleasure he was giving you.

Slowly his fingers stopped their brutal pace, popping out one by one as his thumb gave your clit a few extra lazy circles that had you sobbing from overstimulation.

He almost came right there, memorized by your body begging for his attention and then snapping in two once it became too much.

Your breath was hollow, shaking, and unstable– but you weren't done yet, you had only just begun.

Using all the strength you had left you wrapped your legs around Shigaraki, pulling him as close to yourself as possible.

He yelped in surprise, his head falling into the throat that he had thoroughly loved.

“What–”

“Fuck me Tomura.”

He groaned, his cock twitching at your demand, but oh so ready to grant your wish.

Slowly, he lined himself up with your sopping wet heat, he took a deep breath, preparing his body for what is sure to be something completely and utterly overwhelming.

Pushing into you, you both groaned, the feeling of being full and the feeling of being sucked in taking you both in an instant.

Shigarakis' breaths were few and far between, and he wasn't moving.

“Tomura?” you questioned, turning your head to look at his face.

“I'm going to cum if I move.” he whispered, embarrassment fully taking over any power he thought he had.

“Do it then!” you laughed, using your legs to force him to move just a bit.

He thrust back, whimpering before his body jerked and he fell on top of you.

“Wow, you weren't kidding.” you joked, giggling at the circumstance, feeling on top of the world for having the world's most dangerous villain fall apart right before your eyes.

“Shut up.”

—

As the day came to a close, you found yourself rushing towards Kurogiris last known whereabouts.

You didn't have to leave Shigaraki afterall.