#before I started writing this AU I hadn't written much for the boy

[foolishlovers]

COLLEGE/UNIVERSITY AUs: Below you can find a list of Good Omens fics in which Aziraphale and Crowley are either students or professors at college/university.

[Requested by anon. You can request more fic recs here.]

Catch Me When I Fall by Ghostinthehouse (G, 666) Later, at home, they laugh openly about it, and lay bets on how long it will be before this year's undergraduates catch on that they are married. "Your turn to drop a clue next, angel," Crowley drawls from where he sprawls with his feet on Aziraphale's lap.

A New Adventure by Arielavader (T, 1k) Crowley did not expect the new guy in their D&D group to be so… gorgeous.

Emporium by wingeddeanmon (Not Rated, 1k) Aziraphale's friends ditch him at the local goth store. The employee working is friendly, and he soon develops a crush.

Ineffable Professors by spoondrifts (G, 2k) After noticing all the blatant pining, the classes of Mr. Fell and Dr. Crowley join forces to set up their respective teachers.

The Best College Parties are the Ones that You Leave Early by MariMoon812 (T, 3k) For a moment they just started at each other as Crowley’s spinning head tried to comprehend what, exactly, was happening. Was this one of the professors? No, he clearly wasn’t that old, but then why was he dressed like that? Was it a hipster thing? Did the guy also have an antique typewritter that he used to write history papers? What? Why was he just staring at him? Just as Crowley was beginning to short circuit, the boy squinted at him and leaned forward slightly. “Erm…” “Why are you wearing sunglasses?” “Huh?”

But Together We Have it All by HolyCatsAndRabbits, Dannye Chase (T, 3k) College student Aziraphale discovers that it might not be so bad having terrible roommates if he’s got a handsome fellow student offering the use of his couch for the night. Especially if it seems he’s got a crush on Aziraphale. Really especially if it seems he needs rescuing from his own awful roommates. A Good Omens human AU written for the Good Omens Holiday Exchange on Dreamwidth.

Poor Men by smol_bird (G, 3k) What To Do When Two of Your Professors Are Hopelessly in Love With Each Other: an instruction manual by Adam Young (featuring Pepper Moonchild because someone has to be the voice of reason here).

Snakes and Stones (Never Broke My Bones) by DeerstalkerDeathFrisbee (G, 4k) “How many people don’t believe I exist?” Crowley asks in the doorway. “I’m sure no – ” Aziraphale begins, only to be cut off by Gabriel and a reluctant Newton. “Everyone.” No one wants to say it, but the residents of Dorm A, floor 3, are collectively convinced Aziraphale Fell’s boyfriend does not exist. This is their story.

Seven Minutes In Hell by AppleSeeds (T, 4k) Being trapped in a cupboard with the guy he has such an intense crush on he can hardly speak to him is bad enough, but things get even worse for Crowley when he starts having a panic attack and Aziraphale sweetly comforts and cares for him.

Hanging By a Moment by NaroMoreau (E, 5k) Sometimes the best thing is to leave. Fresh slate and all that. For Crowley, it seems like the only option, having fallen hopelessly in love with his best friend. Who, absolutely, definitely doesn't feel the same. Does he?

Miracles (Or How to Fall in Love) by hope_in_the_dark (T, 6k) “Group project,” the blond guy chirped. “We’re partners.” “Fuck,” Crowley said.

Borrowed Time by NaroMoreau (E, 6k) Meeting a stranger by chance will make Aziraphale face things he hadn't expected.

Comfort and Joy by musegnome (M, 9k) “Extra-large peppermint mocha, triple espresso, double whip!” called the barista. Crowley stepped forward and claimed his giant sugar-drenched monstrosity. The whipped cream ballooned over the rim of the paper cup, and the whole thing shed crumbles of crushed peppermint candy.  Aziraphale’s eyes widened at the sight of it. In awe? Horror? Crowley couldn’t tell.   He didn’t want to leave, not yet, but as he looked around he didn’t see an open table. Not even so much as a bar stool.   “Er – were you planning on staying?” Aziraphale asked, a little shyly. “I’ve got an extra seat.”   Written for the Good Omens OTP Prompts Event.

Raspberry Ripple by FeralTuxedo (T, 9k) Every afternoon, a man in a velvet waistcoat sits on the bench by the stone fountain and eats ice cream. Every afternoon, Crowley watches him from his office window. One day, he’ll pluck up the courage to talk to him.

Secrets by AppleSeeds (M, 10k) When their housemates invite friends around, Crowley and Aziraphale get roped into a game called 'Secrets'. Having played the game before and therefore knowing what might happen, Crowley tries to manipulate the outcome to protect Aziraphale, who is feeling pretty uncomfortable about the whole thing. By the end of the night, however, some secrets will inevitably end up being revealed, but not all of them in the way that Crowley expected.

Just Around the Corner by accidentaldemon (M, 11k) "I don't live far, if you, ya know, don't mind sharing a bed." He swallowed thickly. This was definitely not how he had planned his evening to pan out. “I’m Crowley, by the way. Well, Anthony Crowley technically, but I prefer Crowley.” “Aziraphale." - All Crowley wants to do is leave the party and go home to study. But then he meets a cute boy with absolutely angelic curls who's in desperate need of a bed for the night.

The Summoning by AppleSeeds (M, 15k) Aziraphale's horrible university housemates convince him to accompany them to an old, supposedly haunted, abbey on Halloween. He's not worried about ghosts, Aziraphale is pretty sure they don't really exist, but when his housemates send him into the toilets alone to perform a ritual that's intended to summon a demon, Aziraphale can't help but be afraid. Surely it's not that easy though. Surely a demon won't just appear because he asked it to? Will it?

i was in love (with the place in my mind) by weatheredlaw (E, 17k) There are so many things neither of them can change — how they met, the things they did, the words they said. It’s happened, it was probably always going to happen. And what it is, he can’t say, what he feels is almost too great for any one language. Inutterable, unspeakable ��� Ineffable.

New Approaches by FeralTuxedo (M, 19k) Aziraphale Fell, Professor of Creative Writing at Tadfield University, welcomes the attendees of the First Conference on New Approaches to Genre Fiction. Among them is keynote speaker and best-selling thriller author Anthony J. Crowley. Aziraphale has not seen him for twenty-five years. Sometimes, he can still feel the ghost of their parting kiss on his lips. Or: Exes reunite at academic conference. A Human University Professor/Author AU.

Convergent Evolution by AppleSeeds (T, 22k) Genetics PhD student Crowley meets Aziraphale at a workshop in the second year of his PhD, and they quickly become incredibly close friends. Crowley longs for there to be something more between them, but as the years go by, they seem destined to spend their careers living at opposite ends of the country. That is, until Aziraphale shows up again in Tadfield, back where their friendship began seventeen years ago, with some very exciting news.

Free Trial Boyfriend by MrsCaulfield, angelsnuffbox (T, 37k) Overall, Anthony Crowley considered himself a lucky fellow, with his good looks, good grades and a full ride swimming scholarship. There really wasn't much he can complain about. But his real struggle was that he's completely, maddeningly in love with his best friend - a strong, passionate and oblivious angel who, even after a full year of pining, still can't seem to get the hint, no matter how many times Crowley has tried to flirt with him. - Crowley would never forget the day that the angel first talked to him, for he was certain that was the day that all the clocks around the world began suddenly moving.

search terms by Vagabond (M, 43k) Aziraphale expects it to be a quiet night working in the university library when a flashy red haired, foul mouthed, panicking student needs to find credible sources for his paper and can't figure out how to use the search. Little does Aziraphale know that meeting Crowley will lead him on a path to self-discovery, and give him the family he didn't realize he needed.   From a prompt on tumblr: College AU - You’re REALLY GOOD at using the right search terms for the academic databases and I’m on a deadline.

Joint Honours by FeralTuxedo (E, 43k) PhD student Aziraphale is busy enough with his studies at Tadfield University. But at the start of a new semester, his measured routine gets shaken up by the sudden responsibility of teaching, the arrival of an irresistible new house mate, and a mysteriously flirtatious sausage roll.

Angel in the Window by themaybedoctor (E, 66k) Aziraphale has the best job a young bookworm could ever hope for—he works the evening shift at an independent bookshop, just a stone's throw away from Tadfield College, where he's only a few months away from getting his degree. He likes the location in Tadfield's cosy downtown, the friendly regulars, and his coworker, Newt. But most of all, he likes having the key to the biggest treasure trove of books he's ever seen. Aziraphale knows that he's not going to make friends sitting in the dark shop at night, alone with a book and some chocolate, but that's all right. He's not lonely while he has a book, which means he's hardly lonely at all. Really. Crowley works at a record shop, and he's got the biggest crush on the cutie working at the bookshop next door. Whose name he doesn't even know, because he's too awkward to ask. At least nobody's noticed. If his co-worker Anathema found out, he'd never hear the end of it. A story about bravery, misunderstandings, acceptance, and love.

Golden Handcuffs by seekwill (E, 70k) Far from any city, near the Scottish coast, Tadfield College has a celebrated history, an unrivaled academic reputation, and two departments at war. When the Biology and English departments are forced to share a building, Senior Lecturer and botanist Anthony Crowley finds himself drawn into the orbit of the polite but strange English professor, Dr. Aziraphale Fell. As the new term begins, two academics navigate the politics of both their offices and academia, and try to solve the puzzle of one another.

[You can find more fic rec masterposts here.]

[cuffmeinblack]

Lost and Found

Garreth Weasley x Ominis Gaunt

Tags: explicit | modern!AU | fluff | angst | loss of virginity | homophobia | heartbreak | happy ending

5.4k words

ao3 link

Summary: A love story told in five scenes.

A/n: Inspired by this art and written for the Weasley Wednesday prompt: AU! It's been a while since I wrote Garrinis and I've missed them a whole lot. It's hard for me to write anything but fluff with these two because Ominis deserves the world and Garreth is perfect to shower him with love and happiness. Still, I managed to make myself sad writing it.

One: You Had Me At Hello

"Garreth…Garreth, you're staring again," Cora's voice came from behind him.

"Wha- oh, shit!" 

Garreth's attention returned to the drink he was making, or rather making a mess of. That was one coffee he'd have to start again, much to the chagrin of both the customer and his supervisor. 

"Garreth," Cora sighed. "You can't spend all day staring at him."

He nodded and muttered an apology,  giving the customer a friendly smile as he picked up a fresh mug, but she was too distracted herself to notice. It had been three times in as many weeks that his eyes had wandered away from his job, and instead of his world-class coffee, he'd produced a syrupy, foamy mess all over his apron. Somewhat a fitting conclusion, considering the source of his disturbance and the absolutely lewd daydreams he'd been having.

Garreth couldn't take his eyes off him—goodness knows the blond was way out of his league and would likely turn up his nose so much as utter a single word to him, but that hadn't dissuaded Garreth from indulging in his fantasies. Ones where the boy's delicate, porcelain skin blushed under his own calloused and freckled fingers. He wondered what his voice sounded like, and that thought almost cost him the second macchiato he'd been making. Thankfully, he'd torn his eyes away just in time to deliver a mediocre drink to his loyal customer. He could practically feel Cora's eyes burning into the back of his skull.

"Take your break and go talk to him," she said, nudging him away from the counter.

"I'm not…I can't just go and talk to him…"

"Consider it a condition of your employment."

Garreth sighed, glancing back at her dark stare and crossed arms and deciding against an argument—she was deadly serious. He untied his apron and strung it over a hook in the staff room before steeling himself to do the impossible. What was wrong with him? He'd never felt this nervous around someone he found attractive before. Something about this mystery boy had his stomach in knots before he'd even come close to uttering a greeting, and when the time came that he stood in front of his table, Garreth was quite speechless.

He was even more radiant up close. The hint of blue eyes were cast down at a book as his delicate fingers traced over the…oh. There were no words on the pages, and only then did Garreth notice the white cane leaning next to the table.

Shit.

Well that certainly complicated things. Garreth was a decent looking bloke but now he had to entirely rely on his wit and charm. He was doomed. He must have stood there gaping for minutes before he summoned the courage to clear his throat.

"Er…hello," he said.

The boy continued reading, and Garreth cringed at his attempt at gaining his attention. Stepping closer to the table, he tried again, aware of Cora's scrutinising gaze on him from across the room.

"Hi! Sorry…," he mumbled.

The blond finally tilted his head towards his voice, revealing the most captivating blue eyes Garreth had ever seen. Devoid of pupils, they struck him as two swirling pools of crystal waters, icy hues with flecks of softest grey. 

"Ah, yes, of course," the boy said, pushing his empty mug to the edge of the table.

Garreth had been too busy bumbling and losing himself in his eyes like some lovesick puppy, he'd somehow given the impression of being a member of staff. Well, technically that were true, but that's not why he'd approached. He should have said something, but apparently this boy rendered him completely and utterly useless.

"Thanks!" Garreth squeaked back, taking the mug and retreating behind the counter with a furious blush and a whole heap of embarrassment.

To say he'd never seen Cora more annoyed at him would have been an overstatement, but the way her pale face pinched into a frown only heightened his unease.

"He uh…thought I was staff," he mumbled.

"Yes, I can see that," she said, staring at the mug still clutched in his hand as if it were a priceless artifact.

"I swear to God, Garreth…if you don't talk to him properly I'll fire you."

"You wouldn't. What about my loyal customers? There'd be uproar!" he replied, only half joking.

"You're not irreplaceable, especially if you can't make a simple drink in his vicinity," she said, snatching the mug away.

Her attention diverted to serve a nervous young lady who'd obviously overheard the entirely unprofessional exchange. With a groan, Garreth steeled himself to again approach the source of his distraction. He didn't have a plan, as with most things, but at least he could put right his first mistake.

"Hello again! Sorry to disturb you, I uh…well, I wanted to say hello. I'm Garreth," he said, sticking out his hand which lingered awkwardly in the air.

Of course it was, he couldn't see it. Idiot.

Garreth lowered his hand and helped himself to a spare seat opposite the boy, who's finger paused on the raised bumps of his book. Heavens above, what was it about him that made Garreth so bloody nervous? Was it the way he held himself so elegantly? Those piercing eyes that couldn't see but appeared to stare right into Garreth's soul? The blond gave off an aura of propriety—he practically oozed old money. Not Garreth's usual type, considering his own scruffiness that never seemed able to be tamed. His wild, curly copper locks were in stark contrast to the boy's slicked back mane with not a strand out of place…except that little piece that fell in front of his eyes when he bent his head…oh. Shit, he'd replied. Say something, Garreth!

"Uhhhhh…"

"I said hello, Garreth," the boy repeated with a soft, amused smile. "I'm Ominis. How can I help?"

Ominis. He had a name, which was far more than Garreth deserved so far with his poor attempt at introduction. Of course he had the voice of an angel; how could he not when everything else about him was so utterly perfect?

"I thought I'd say hello. I've noticed you in here quite a lot."

"You have?" Ominis asked, placing his hands in his lap and giving Garreth his full attention.

"Yeah…you're one of the few customers that doesn't drink coffee," Garreth chuckled.

"Ah, is that the reason? I confess I'm more of a tea drinker, but I enjoy the ambience here," he said.

"Maybe you'd enjoy coffee more if I made it for you," Garreth said, his confidence growing.

"You're certainly welcome to try," Ominis chuckled.

His soft, melodic laugh sent a tingle down Garreth's spine.

"I will, next time you're here I'll make you the best coffee you've ever tasted."

"I look forward to being converted. So, Garreth…do you do anything besides make excellent beverages?"

"Oh, yeah. I study here, this is only a part-time job. I'm guessing you're a student, too?"

"I am. English literature," he said, though he didn't seem elated at the idea. "How about you?"

"Chemistry ...oh, and I'm in a band."

He cringed inwardly, and outwardly, too—that line always sounded so cool when he told it to girls, but somehow when presenting this information to Ominis it sounded...ridiculous. Juvenile. If Ominis thought so, he didn't show it, only smiling good-naturedly.

"What music do you play?"

"Nothing you're likely to enjoy…"

"How could you possibly know what music I enjoy?"

"Well…I suppose I don't. Only that you don't exactly dress like someone who listens to punk rock," Garreth replied lamely.

"Perhaps not, but it makes very little difference to me what I look like."

"Right…of course…"

"I enjoy most music, as long as there's feeling."

Garreth almost opened his big mouth to ask if Ominis would consider letting him play for him, but was saved the embarrassment by Cora's stern voice cutting through the dreamlike haze telling him to get back to work.

"I have to get back to work. Can I…?"

Ominis handed Garreth his phone before he could even finish the sentence, and Garreth grinned as he accepted it, typing in his number whilst wondering if he'd hear from him at all. Perhaps he was simply being polite, but the eagerness Ominis had shown was hard to conceal behind good manners.

"Lovely to meet you Garreth…?" 

"Weasley. Garreth Weasley."

"I'm Ominis Gaunt."

Perhaps the name should have meant something to him, the way Ominis hesitated to say it, but all Garreth could think of for the rest of the day was the beautiful boy with the strange name.

-

Two: The Odd Couple

Ominis hadn't expected Garreth. He'd sprung out of nowhere when he least expected it, and made ripples through his otherwise stagnant life. Not just ripples, but a veritable tidal wave that dislodged Ominis from his melancholy and carried him to safer shores. One might be surprised to learn of Ominis and Garreth's relationship, but only when looking skin-deep. Apparently, their appearance was chalk and cheese, and their demeanours just as contrasting—and so, people called them odd.

Ominis disagreed wholeheartedly. 

How could they be odd if their hands fit together so perfectly? How could they be strange when Garreth never failed to bring a smile to Ominis' face? The muscles in his cheeks felt as if they had atrophied from years of non-use, until Garreth came along and provided him with much needed laughter. Ominis hadn't realised just how much he enjoyed the warmth of another body before Garreth had held him. In the space of three months, he'd learned so much about himself, by simply being around Garreth. 

And yes, he liked coffee now. But only when Garreth made it. One of his new favourite smells was the dark roast currently steaming in the mug he was cradling, the other happened to be the smell of cinammon and a hint of sulphur. Garreth's lab coat always gave off the most pungent odours after his classes, but it was still him.

Garreth was sitting on the floor of his bedroom as he often did, strumming his guitar. Today's composition was something pleasantly slow, a little sad, and terribly romantic. He could already feel the buildup of pressure behind his eyes that signalled an embarrassing show of emotion he tried hard to suppress, and the swell in his chest he so often associated with his boyfriend. He sipped his coffee and listened, allowing himself to feel anything and everything that the song's sweet melody elicited. As the last chord vibrated in the air between them, Ominis shifted on the bed and sighed, offering Garreth a soft smile.

"Beautiful," he said. “I could listen to your voice forever.”

“Hardly, but I’m glad you enjoyed it.”

The clunk of a guitar discarded against the wall preceded the warm and heavy weight of Garreth pressing between his legs, still kneeling on the floor. Warm hands encircled Ominis’s back as Garreth’s head was nestled into his thighs. Ominis smiled as he stroked those silken curls; another thing he'd not expected to enjoy quite so much. The rhythmic back and forth of his hand and the happy hums from his boyfriend let his mind wander, back to what he’d been mulling over during that rendition. Something terrifying and exciting that he craved more than anything.

Sex.

Three months was a long time to wait by anyone's standards, especially two men still riddled with teenage hormones. Garreth had been more than patient. It wasn't that Ominis didn't want to—very much the opposite. The days spent in each other's company were hard, but all the nights crammed into a single bed together were nothing short of agony. His heart yearned and his body ached for Garreth, yet so far he'd been a coward. Ominis had never been intimate with a soul; never had he allowed anyone else to touch him at his most vulnerable. It was a matter of trust to give oneself over to another completely, and whilst he trusted Garreth implicitly, Ominis had failed to gather the courage to ask for more.

Until tonight.

"Garreth?"

"Mhmmm?" he hummed happily from Ominis' lap.

"I'd like to sleep with you," Ominis said, trying to ignore his hammering heart.

"Of course. Let me just change the sheets…"

"No, I mean…"

"Oh."

No further explanation was required. Ominis felt the bed dip either side of him and Garreth's soft lips on his before he could draw another breath. His firm body pressed against him, warm and inviting under the numerous layers he wore. He'd have to dispose of those, once his hands stopped shaking. Garreth had all the restraint in the world as he peeled off Ominis' jumper, running slow kisses along his jaw, his neck, tongue finding his thumping pulse. Ominis tilted his head, so lost in his lips' caress that he hardly noticed his hands begin to unbutton Garreth's jeans or the rhythmic rocking of their hips.

Months of teasing and simmering tension had led to this moment; little wonder they were both stiff within seconds. The friction between their bodies set his body on fire, every inch restricted by these damned clothes felt like a prison when his skin burned to be pressed bare against Garreth's. His shirt was gently peeled from his shoulders and the fabric replaced by soft lips that tempted and teased. When Garreth nibbled his collarbone, Ominis lost all sense of self as he fell back on the bed and harshly shoved his own trousers down his hips. Gone was his calm, collected exterior; instead he lay bare, gasping and desperate to be touched.

"Garreth…," he sighed as the warm, gentle kisses trailed down his chest.

His muffled reply came as a hand wrapped around Ominis' cock and the most improper whimper left his lips. His world may have ended the moment he was enveloped by a warm, wet mouth. Garreth pulled salacious moans from him over and over again as his tongue flicked and swirled and whipped Ominis into a frenzy. His hands were in his hair, the sheets, grabbing anything he could as his hips bucked wildly into that amazing mouth, hitting the tight ring of muscle on more than one occasion. Garreth didn't seem to mind as he simply growled his approval whenever Ominis' cock slid down his throat. He needed to stop before he exploded right then and there, but how could he when it felt so good, so right, so utterly perfect?

"Stop, ah-! Stop, or I'll come," he managed to groan.

Garreth stirred in his lap, muffled moans vibrating against his length until his deliciously soft mouth left his cock with a pop. Ominis groaned, regretting his decision already, until Garreth's hoarse whisper filled his ears.

"Do you want to…take me, or…?"

Oh, yes. But more than anything, Ominis wanted to be on the receiving end of Garreth's touches. Underneath him, pressed into the mattress as his mouth and hands explored every inch they could reach whilst his cock buried deep inside him. He'd experimented, certainly, but his albeitly long fingers would be no substitute for what he knew Garreth sported in his trousers.

"I want you inside me."

His boyfriend growled with uncontained lust and Ominis' heart found its way into his mouth, suddenly apprehensive, nervous that Garreth might lose himself too soon. He needn't have worried—his caress was featherlight despite the heaviness of his breath and throbbing of his cock against Ominis' thigh. 

"I'm going to get some lube now, okay?" Garreth said.

Ominis nodded, listening to the rummaging in the nightstand drawer. Those strong, calloused hands spread his legs, exposing him completely, yet he felt safe. Garreth was so gentle, whispering in his ear and exchanging sloppy kisses as his fingers teased and prepared him. Ominis arched his back and wriggled his hips for more, please. Garreth sensed his impatience and gave him a long, searing kiss as his fingers retreated, and replaced them with something far larger.

"Let me know if you want me to stop," Garreth whispered.

"I will. But I won't."

"Are you ready?" 

"Yes…yes, please," Ominis gasped, surprising himself with just how pleading his tone was.

Garreth groaned into his mouth, his fingers in Ominis' hair as he pushed inside him. Fuck, it stung, but heavens above he felt incredible. He'd so far been trying to keep his audible pleasure as muted as possible, but the moan that left his lips vibrated off the walls and filled the room and surely far beyond. The last of his composure broke down as Garreth buried himself to the hilt, his hand cupping Ominis’ face as their foreheads pressed together. This was intimacy as he’d never known it; their noses brushed and soft sighs mingled in the air between them as Garreth let Ominis adjust to his size and relax around him.

“How does that feel?” Garreth murmured against his lips.

“Incredible. You’re incredible.”

Not ‘you feel incredible’, just ‘you are incredible’. Perhaps that was the closest he’d gotten to admitting his true feelings, which were both terrifying and all-consuming. 

Three months, twelve days. 

That’s how long it had taken Ominis to admit to himself that he was in love with Garreth Weasley.

-

Three: The Fall

Ominis couldn't help but smile whenever his phone read the words 'incoming call from- Garreth Weasley'. Perhaps he was a fool for falling so hard, so fast. He ought to rein in his feelings, lest he end up with a broken heart, yet Garreth was so easy to love. When Ominis was with him, he could forget the rest of the world; all of his worries, every crushing pressure that threatened to break his already fragile heart. 

Ominis was no fool—he knew how others must view him. They saw his clothes, heard his name, and immediately thought they'd sussed him out as another spoiled trust fund kid with far too much money and very little else to offer. Some days, Ominis believed them. What would he be without his family, after all? A poor blind boy with a brilliant mind, but born into a cruel world rife with discrimination. Garreth only saw the Ominis he wished that he himself could perceive. 

Ominis answered the phone the way he always did.

"Hello, sunshine."

The nickname seemed so befitting for Garreth that he found it hard to be embarrassed about it.

"Omi! Can you meet me after work? I have a surprise for you," his slightly fuzzy voice came through the speaker, no less beautiful amongst the static.

"Of course—five?"

"Yep, I'll see you then!"

"Was that all?" Ominis asked.

"I have to get back to work. Cora's on my arse to finish my break..."

"You know you could have just texted me?"

"Then I wouldn't have been able to hear your voice."

Ominis' cheeks burned as he exhaled a contained chuckle through his nose. 

"I'm glad you did. See you later."

I love you.

Instead of saying that, he hung up. Perhaps the first time shouldn't be over the phone—it should be somewhere and sometime more befitting the gravity of the words. When Ominis was curled up in Garreth's arms after spending the night together, maybe. He'd had plenty of those, yet the words hadn't materialised. No matter, there was still plenty of time. 

He had a couple of lectures to attend before meeting Garreth, but still time to pop by the library for a few much-needed books. He'd picked a challenging subject considering many of the books he'd study weren't available in braille. Some were available as audio books, and some had been miraculously made available to him by the good graces of the University—or rather, his father's heavy influence and deep pockets.

His phone vibrated in his coat as he walked the steps up to the library, and the robotic voice announced something far less desirable than a call from Garreth.

Speak of the devil…

'Incoming call from- Father.'

His gut twisted as it always did when he was forced to talk to his family. It would be unwise for him to simply ignore the call, as much as he wished to. With a great sigh, he sat down on a low brick wall and readied himself before answering the annoying buzzing with a terse greeting.

"Father. How can I help?"

"Ominis. How are you?"

As if he cared.

"I'm fine. How are you?"

As if he cared.

"Very well. I'm calling in regards to a rumour I've heard regarding your conduct."

"My conduct," Ominis stated bluntly.

"Yes, your conduct. How you conduct yourself about the University. Your company has raised some concerns."

"My my, father, if you have something to say then please be out with it," Ominis said, not sure we're his sudden confidence was coming from.

Perhaps it had bubbled up from the pit of rage in his stomach.

"You've been seen with some scruffy boy. In his dormitory, around the campus. Not only have you been indiscreet, your choice of partner leaves much to be desired."

"To whom?"

"To me, Ominis."

"And what, pray tell, is the purpose of your call?"

"You know very well. I'll not have you galavanting about with some boy like some poof."

"Ah, therein lies the problem. I am a poof."

"Despite your disappointment, you're still my son…but I will not tolerate such disrespect. I got you where you are now, boy, and I can reverse your good fortunes just as quickly. Goodbye, Ominis."

The line went dead before Ominis could spit back a retort; perhaps for the best given how furious he was—he must have been attracting quite a bit of attention. His hands were shaking such that his cane rattled on the stone pavement. Anger quickly became secondary to his fear—his father was many things, but he was not a man who issued idle threats. It didn't surprise him that he'd been keeping an eye on him whilst at University—likely under the guise of concern for his poor, blind son. Ominis knew the real reason, and his father had just made it abundantly clear with that phone call.

He must have sat on that brick wall for hours. He missed his first lecture, and decided to skip the second, retreating to his dormitory with a numb backside and an even more numb emotional state. He barely managed to get out of bed to meet Garreth after his shift. Of course he knew something was wrong with Ominis, his concern showing in the way he touched him more gently, the way his voice was softer and an octave higher. Ominis tried to put the conversation out of his mind, but how could he ignore something so life-altering? For a few hours, he put on a poor façade of contentment, whilst his mind slipped deeper into melancholy. He kissed Garreth that night as if the world was ending, and he was quite sure that it was.

-

Four: Gone

Six months. Six months it had been since his heart was ripped out of his chest and soul torn asunder. Garreth was by nature a happy person, full of optimism, but what Ominis Gaunt's departure left behind was a husk of his former self. His friends tried their best to help, but as soon as he was alone, Garreth let the darkness take him. He'd wallow for hours, days at a time, not quite knowing if he'd feel a desire to leave his bed again.

Ominis had left without a word. His phone number went straight to voicemail. His dormitory lay empty. Garreth had asked around and been told he had deferred a year, and that he would be back in September. Garreth wasn't sure if the thought comforted him or made it worse—he still wasn't sure as the month rolled around.

Things were a little better now, thanks to Cora. His job had been a godsend, truth be told, even if he couldn't help the surreptitious glances to the table that Ominis had once frequented. All Summer break, he'd thrown himself into his part-time job, his music, his art. All the little things that made him happy, despite the gaping chasm left in his chest. True, it sometimes felt hollow when he wrote a new song when Ominis wasn't there to hear it, and the drawings he made were often of him despite his best attempts at anyone, anything else. He was trying, though, and each day got a little easier…until the start of term approached.

"Don't go looking for him, Garreth," Cora said, face set into a hard stare.

"I won't," he promised.

He wouldn't go looking, but he might happen upon him whilst walking to and from lectures. Garreth wasn't sure what he wanted—perhaps just to know that Ominis was alright. He should hate him, but so far he'd not managed to muster the feeling. The first week came and went and Garreth didn't see Ominis. He didn't see him whilst crossing the courtyard outside the English building twice a day, nor in the coffee shop when he worked. He didn't find him lingering in the library or outside on the lawn in the shade of the oak tree he loved so much. If Ominis had returned, he was a ghost.

It wasn't until a week later that Garreth finally found him. He'd not even been looking, but the cane was hard to miss when it smacked into his leg.

"Ominis," he gasped, unbelieving.

The pressure built behind his eyes and his throat constricted; his heart hammered and breath grew shallow; there was no angry outburst nor demanding of an explanation, only relief and overwhelming hurt.

"G-Garreth?"

"Yeah, yeah it's me. Sorry, I'm in your way."

"You're not. Well, you are, but I'm glad you are."

A silence grew that Garreth didn't know how to fill, only able to stare at the boy he still loved and commit every edge, every mark, every pore to memory in case he didn't see him again.

"I'm so sorry," Ominis whispered.

Ah, there were the tears that followed the words he'd wanted to hear for the past six months. Garreth was weeping in the middle of campus, and he didn't care as Ominis' arms wrapped around him, hesitant and unsure. He wanted to ask him to hold him tighter, but this moment was fragile, and Garreth couldn't run the risk of breaking the spell.

"Tell me why you left, then you never have to see me again," he managed to say through the tears.

"I told you everything in my letter, it was the truth, but…things have changed, admittedly."

"What letter?"

"What do you mean? The letter I left for you before I…"

Ominis looked panicked as Garreth looked at him through bleary eyes, rapidly blinking away the tears as he tried not to follow suit.

"I didn't get a letter. Tell me you're joking."

"Why would I joke? I left you a letter explaining why I'd left. It was cowardly of me, I should have told you…you never got it? You never knew?"

"No, I never knew."

"Garreth…"

Ominis held him tighter, then, and Garreth squeezed him back. Garreth was sure his heart would soon burst from his chest or he'd simply throw up on the ground, but he managed to ask Ominis to sit with him. They sat on the grass where they'd shared their first kiss and Ominis told him everything that the letter contained. He'd pinned it to his door, but it had been taken before Garreth had a chance to read it.

"I believed my father when he said I'd amount to nothing without him. He's told me as much since the day I'd learned to talk. So I took a gap year, hoping that…you'd forget about me."

"So we can't be together because of your homophobic arsehole of a father?" Garreth asked furiously.

Ominis winced and shook his head with a sad smile.

"No, he's no longer a problem. I regretted my decision almost immediately but I admit I was too ashamed to return. I've spent the past few months working and saving enough money to cut ties with my family."

Ominis took a shaky breath before continuing, his piercing blue eyes fixed into the distance and pricked with tears of his own.

"I know I don't deserve your forgiveness, but I want you to know that it was you who gave me the strength to finally say no to my father. You…you made me feel more than just a shadow of him."

Garreth sat in stunned silence for minutes just watching the passersby. His brain ached with the deluge of new information. Everything was raw, shocking, unbelievable. 

"Why didn't you find me and tell me?"

"Why would you want anything to do with me after I left?" Ominis asked.

"Because I love you. I love you and if I'd told you that maybe you wouldn't have left in the first place."

There it was; Garreth's heart laid bare. The truth he'd been too scared to tell Ominis before he left and spent half a year trying to deny. 

"I love you too, Garreth. I always will."

He wasn't sure if that changed things, not yet—there was too much to mull over, too much to consider. Garreth stayed silent, simply placing his hand on Ominis' in the long grass.

"Garreth?" Ominis whispered into the breeze.

"Mmm?"

"I'll spend the rest of my life trying to regain your trust, if you'll let me."

-

Five: Forever

Forgiveness and love were said to be fickle things. Ominis hadn't thought he'd deserved the former. The latter was implicitly given; Garreth owned his heart, and had done so since the day they had met. The turbulent and beautiful and incredible years ran through his mind as he stood outside the room that would change the course of his life forever. Perhaps it would have been easier for Garreth to walk down the aisle, but Ominis was loath to rob him of his first look—it was the least he could offer. They had planned every detail for themselves, unshackled from the demands of his family and bolstered by the love and support of Garreth’s.

Ominis chose to hold the arm of a dear friend as he walked, the comforting warmth that stayed the shake in his hand a much better prospect than his cane. Sebastian had been an excellent best man so far, even if his stag ‘do left a lot to be desired. All was forgiven as Ominis wrapped his fingers around his forearm and took a deep breath that didn't fill the depths of his lungs. 

“You’ve got this,” Sebastian muttered as the doors opened.

Why had they chosen such heart-wrenching music for this part? He was already fighting back tears and he’d barely stepped in the room. All Ominis could do was focus on his breathing and the tight grip he had around Sebastian's forearm. The walk was an eternity, made all the more agonising by the sobbing from Mrs Weasley, yet he finally made it to the end and was promptly scooped up into Garreth's arms. They'd not even exchanged vows and their lips were pressed together, holding each other as if the other might choose to bolt at the last second.

After that, it was all a blur. Words were said, tears were shed, and not one minute went by that Ominis' cheeks didn't hurt from smiling. He'd completely forgotten the vows he'd prepared, yet the right sentiments came spilling forth anyway. He'd told Garreth exactly what he meant to him; nothing short of his entire world. It was no secret what had transpired in their University years, yet it would only be mentioned briefly amongst the outpouring of love. The 'blip', as they called it, had shaped their relationship, their entire lives, but inevitably led them here. Ominis wouldn't change a thing, and neither would Garreth.

"You may now kiss," the registrar said to the eruption of cheers and claps.

Oh, thank God. Ominis clasped Garreth's cheeks so tightly he might have torn his head clean off his shoulders. Their first kiss as a wedded couple was quite the display, but Ominis couldn't quite bring himself to be embarrassed. It was hard to keep their mouths together amongst the grins spreading rapidly across their faces, and a clash of teeth later they pulled apart laughing and clasping hands.

Three years, eleven months. 

That's how long it had taken Ominis to make Garreth Weasley his forever.

[things-arent-what-they-seem66]

Guardian Angel AU

Can you perhaps… Write their first Christmas together?

That day is so cute :<

Sure! Christmas in July. It's still June.

@dolce-tenebra-toscana I'm including Melody!!

Adam was jittery, Christmas time was always the time of year he was the most lonely and vulnerable. Sera would send $20 in a card that was pre-written, Alastor wouldn't come by until New Year's Eve, so that was a gift in itself.

Normally Adam would just spend it holed up in his apartment, drinking more than normal and taking even more pills to forget about what this time of year used to be for him.

No, this year he was spending Christmas with Lucifer and Melody at her place. Adam hadn't been there in nearly two years, even though she tried to coax him out he didn't even open the door when she came by.

Lucifer's therapy sessions have been helping him a lot. And since they've started dating Adam has felt even better.

A knock on his door got Adam out of his head, he answered and smiled when he saw it was Lucifer. "Hey! You ready to go?"

"Yeah, I'm ready." Adam had his normal hoodie on, it kept him nice and warm. Not to mention it kept his boys close to him. He locked up his apartment and him and Lucifer walked to Melody's hand in hand.

Something about just holding Lucifer's hand made Adam feel more safe and secure.

The walk didn't take too long, which was good cause it was cold out. "Oh my god, Adam! It's so good to see you!!" Melody cheered and brought the brunette in for a tight hug, he hugged her back. He missed her, Adam didn't realize how much until this very moment. "And Lucifer, glad you could make it come on in!"

Adam actually found the entire evening to be nice. They all talked as they ate and drank hot chocolate that Melody made herself, her cat Ziggy found his way to Adams lap for some much needed pets.

Adam and Lucifer took to looking at the decorations that Melody put up on her fireplace. "This has been really nice." Adam commented.

Lucifer nodded in agreement. "Yeah, Melody really knows how to make someone feel welcome."

They turned when they heard her giggling. "Oops, how'd that get there?"

Confused, Adam followed her gaze above their heads and......

Mistletoe.

Adam felt his heart race. This shouldn't be a difficult thing to do, they were dating after all. He must have had a panicked look on his face because Lucifer cupped his face in his hands.

"We don't have to if you want to." Intimacy has always been difficult for Adam, since Steve, since Valentino. Even just kissing can send him into a panic.

But Lucifer....... Not with Lucifer, he always makes Adam feel calm and his kisses always make Adam's heart race for a different reason.

Adam flushed, he wanted to do this. He never kissed someone under the mistletoe before. "I want to." He admitted shyly.

Adam and Lucifer closed the gap between them in a soft kiss. Adam held onto Lucifer as if he was going to float away to the heavens above. The kiss was deepened slightly and Adams head was spinning, all he could think, feel, and smell was Lucifer.

The scent of apples and cinnamon along with something that Adam could only describe as being purely Lucifer. He loved the way he smelled.

When they pulled apart they smiled at each other, Adams was less shy than before. Fuck, he really loved Lucifer. Maybe one day he'd tell him.

"Awww, you guys are just too cute." Melody said, she had watched them. She was so happy Adam found someone who was good to him, god knows the man deserved it.

When Adam and Lucifer left, they went back to Lucifer's place and watched classic Christmas movies curled up on the couch in their pajamas until they fell asleep.

That was Adams best Christmas ever.

[another-clive-blog]

I voted to marry the boy, could you write him being incredibly smitten with one Emmy Altava? (I would take any Clemmy really, but Clive MUST be head over heels for her)

SORRY FOR THE DELAY !! My sincerest apologies, this week has been kicking my ass-

This was hard to write, because I'm bad at shipping and also I don't know the first thing about Emmy ? She works with Layton and is gorgeous, that's it :'D I did ask some friends who told me about a camera ?? So I tried to like. Work from there

ANYWAY !! AU where Emmy works at Clive's newspaper as a part-job on top of her adventures with Layton ! She is a photographer and 20-year-old Clive is a writer. Also this is Unwound Future Canon-compliant (kinda ? It works from Clive's perspective). This is teen, comfort no hurt, fluff, and entirely written from clive's POV

Emmy fans I apologize in advance if I didn't do your girl justice, she is gorgeous and I want to get to know her

Clive remembered that fateful day- not the day it had all started, of course, but the day his whole plan had been thrown off the rails.

It was a day just like the others- or rather, it would have been, had his article not been rejected. He had been working at the newspaper for two years now, ever since he'd graduated at age 18 : two years, and not once had one of his articles been refused. All of his work had always been met with approval at worst, congratulations at best- nothing less.

But not this time. The direction hadn't said much about this outrageous event, simply something about his article needing more work, apparently. This usually wouldn't bother Clive : failure was a part of life, and he forgave those poor souls for failing to perceive the greatness of his work.

And yet- this was a problem. Clive had asked to be granted access to informations about the Incident ever since he started working here, and his request had been denied every time. He had to prove his reliability first, they said, show them that he hadn't taken the job just to get his hands on classified files. It was annoying, truly : of course he had, but proving otherwise was tiresome.

But now, with this failure... Was his progress going to fade away ? Could he still hope to get these documents soon ? Or was this the faux pas that would cost him his prize entirely ?

Clive sighed, putting that traitorous piece of paper back on his desk : he leaned back in his chair and closed his eyes for a moment.

What should he do now ?

"Well, that's a sad face if I've ever seen one," a voice commented in an extremely helpful way. He didn't recognize it, mostly because he couldn't be bothered to learn his colleagues' voices or names- mostly because they kept coming to annoy him at the worst possible time. Which was all the time.

"Could you please leave me alone for once or is it really too much to ask ?" Clive knew that he didn't sound very pleasant or respectful, but that was literally the last of his problems. Besides, he had isolated his desk from the rest specifically because he didn't want others to come bother him.

"Pretty sure this is the first time we meet. At least, I don't remember seeing you before. Are you new too ?" She replied, and she really wasn't leaving, was she ? Then again, if she was new here, she probably didn't know that he wasn't here to make friends.

He opened his eyes.

The first thing to catch his gaze was the odd yellow dress, a strange outfit to wear in a place like this : she looked like an adventurer, not a journalist. There wasn't any dress code to meet in order to work here, but still...

Then again, she did have a bow tie.

"I've been here for two years," he deadpanned. She seemed nice and that was good for her, really, but he wasn't in the mood for chit-chat. "Welcome to the team, I suppose."

She smiled. It wasn't bright like a sun or sweet like chocolate, but it was rather something authentic, that she had worked hard to obtain and preserve. This was the kind of smile that would inspire tons of stories and articles- at least to someone really passionate about this job.

Clive wasn't. He wasn't here to change the world or make friends, he was here to get these classified files that would hopefully help him move on.

"Thank you," she said, before putting one hand on his desk and leaning forward : Clive pushed his chair back a little. "Say, since we're a team now, do you mind telling me why I've never seen you hang out with the others ?"

Oh wow. Alright, no little mind games- just straight to the point.

That really was new.

"Well," Clive muttered, looking away, "I have work to do."

She tilted her head slightly, his answer only making her more curious. "And they don't ?"

Was this some kind of test ? Clive couldn't perceive any ill intentions behind this question, but it didn't sound all that mundane either. What was she at ?

"Of course they do," he explained himself, "But this is important to me, and-" Actually- why was he even telling her that ? She probably didn't care, he didn't care, this whole discussion was useless : he had no reason to keep it going. "And my article just got refused, so I have even more work to do." He said abruptly, hoping to end the conversation.

She didn't go away. "Oh really ? That sucks. Want me to take a look ?" She offered, as if she wasn't new here.

"Don't take this the wrong way, but I'm not sure you can help much," Clive said coldly. He wasn't in the mood for this. "I mean, you're new, and a photographer, so this may not be your-"

"Nonsense !" She put her hands on her hips, the same smile on her face. She had listened to approximately none of his reasoning. Stubborn, Clive thought. Stubborn and very confident.

"I may not write the articles, but I know how they work," she said. "Also, I have learned a thing or two from Layton."

Clive froze. Layton. The professor Layton ? The one who had saved him as a kid, the man who was his model, his inspiration, his-

"Hey, this article is about him !" Quick as a fox, she had leaned over his desk and grabbed the piece of paper : her eyes were done scanning through the first few paragraphs before Clive could even react.

"Wh- where are your manners ?!" He yelled at her, blushing furiously. Alright, that was it-

Pushing his chair back, he quickly made his way around his desk, reaching for his sorry excuse of an article.

She dodged his poor attempt at taking back his sheet of paper with no effort whatsoever. "This is pretty good," she said, talking about the paper rather than his embarrassing fight.

Clive was a clever man- that's why he decided after yet another vain attempt that he couldn't win. Somewhere in his mind, he noted that she had to truly be an adventurer of some kind : she was surprisingly strong, agile and terribly efficient, unbothered by someone like him.

He reluctantly gave up his useless fight, taking a few steps back and crossing his arms instead. "Not good enough, apparently," he spat, glaring at her. She had no shame, no hesitation, no weakness- who even was she ?!

"Yeah, I can see why," she nodded, and Clive was once again baffled by her ability to say honest things without any hard feelings behind it.

"Your article is good, but you forgot the presentation," she explained, stepping closer to better show him : this proximity made Clive agitated, although he wasn't sure why. "You talk like everyone knows Layton, but that's just not true- especially since you're dealing with his first ever adventure. You have to keep everyone in mind, not just the readers who are as knowledgeable about this subject as you are."

Clive choked. "I-I'm not-"

"Hey, I could give you a good photo of Layton !" She interrupted him with a smile. "That way, everyone would know who we're talking about."

"Yeah, about that- do you actually know the professor ?" He narrowed his eyes at her, looking her up and down. She didn't seem like the kind of person the professor would frequent, bow tie or no bow tie.

"Of course !" She said, before her voice took a challenging intonation, "What, wanna bet ?"

Clive scoffed. She was being ridiculous- this was probably all an elaborate plan to make fun of him. He could absolutely picture his colleagues telling her to prank him as some sort of initiation ritual, actually. She certainly was almost as annoying as they all were.

But she may know the professor. "Sure," he finally said. "If you can take this photo and bring it to me, I'll buy you a coffee tomorrow."

"Wow, hey, don't ruin yourself for me Tiger," she sarcastically said. Tiger ??

"Wha-"

"Alright, I'll come tomorrow by your sad and isolated desk to give you the picture," she decided. "I love proving I'm right, almost as much as I love drinking terrible coffees with rude co-workers."

"Are you serious-"

"See you!" She cut him off with a provocative grin, again, and left without listening to another word he had to say, again.

Clive watched her go in silence, furious. Who did she think she was ?! She had been here for what, a couple hours, and she just came up to him like that ? He hoped she had annoyed everyone else too : that way, she'd get fired sooner rather than later.

The thought did make him feel better, and he sat back in his chair, enjoying the calm of the small room where stood his isolated desk. If he focused hard enough, he could hear her laugh with others in the next room- but he couldn't, because he didn't care enough to pay attention.

So since he wasn't listening to the sound of her voice, it was silent. And enjoyable. And lonely- which was good, because he hated having to deal with others. Especially her -what was her name again ? Not that it mattered-, because she was so rude and straight-forward and confident. Really confident.

Nevermind.

He picked up the article, looking at it thoughtfully. He needed this article to be accepted, and he needed it to be his best work yet : it was the only way to prove he was worthy of the reputation he had built for himself, and, most importantly- the only way to get what he wanted, the Truth.

...Presentation, uh ?

-_-_-_-

Surely enough, the very next day, Emmy came back to his desk with a brand new picture.

Professor Layton, sitting at a table, enjoying a nice cup of tea. He was smiling serenely, and his face held a bit of warmth, of comfort, of home.

"There you go !" Emmy said with a very satisfied smile, one that Clive wasn't ready to see this early in the morning.

He took the photo she was handing him. It felt recent and authentic : in fact, he could see yesterday's newspaper on the table, next to Layton's hand. It was crazy. There was no way they actually knew each other.

"Are you a paparazzi ?" He asked before he could stop himself. He shouldn't throw accusations her way in case she really was close to the professor, but what else could it be ?

"What ? No !" Emmy didn't seem to get offended- on the contrary, she stood proudly, hands on her hips. "I'm his associate !"

Oh.

Clive fell silent, his gaze wandering back to the picture. The professor was facing whoever had taken the photography : he was fully aware someone was here, taking this very picture. Had she asked him to smile ? Or was he just that happy to help his associate win a stupid bet and make a name for herself at her new job ?

Why would someone like the professor choose her as an associate ?

"That's odd," Emmy said with feigned naivety. "I recall you being a real Layton fan, and yet you didn't recognize the one and only Emmy Altava, associate of the great professor Layton ? Surely someone as knowledgeable as you should know this. I mean, it'd be pretty humiliating if you didn't, right ?"

He looked up, staring at her, and she stared him down with a provocative smirk, waiting for his answer.

Somehow, he... he wasn't mad. He didn't feel like angrily answering or starting a fight, which was relatively rare : maybe this was due to the fact that he knew she could easily destroy him.

Or maybe this was due to the fact that he really wanted to know what Layton had seen in her, now. "I'm not a Layton fan, and I didn't know he had an associate."

Emmy's smirk disappeared quickly at his admission, replaced with something that was almost disappointment. She hummed, looking at him strangely. "...This is really not as satisfying as you had me believe it would be. I was looking forward to crushing your little ego under my boot."

Alright- forget that. Clive scoffed. "Don't forget I have to buy you a disgusting coffee now, so we're stuck together for a few more painful minutes."

"Ah- I had indeed forgotten about that part," She admitted, scratching the top of her head. All of the antagonizing and taunting was gone, just like that, Clive noticed : how did she move on so quickly ? He never ever missed an opportunity to rightfully put people in their places. But she was already over it ??

Emmy -she did say her name was Emmy, right ? Emmy Altava- shrugged, coming to a decision. "Disgusting coffee is better than no coffee. Lead the way, Tiger."

He groaned. "Stop calling me that."

"Wait," she paused, and he stared at her while waiting for whatever nonsense she was about to spit. "...What is your name ?"

...You know what- that was fair. He hadn't told her, after all. "I'm Clive Dove."

She snapped her fingers, that same confident grin on her lips. "Great. Lead the way, Clivey."

Clive groaned before leaving the room without a word. Emmy followed him with a satisfied grin, very proud and amused by his pointless anger.

Clive walked faster, trying to hide the blush that crept on his face.

-_-_-_-

They didn't interact much after the coffee : in fact, they didn't talk at all for the next few days.

Clive would see her sometimes, or hear her. He heard her a lot : she had a booming voice, full of life and passion. Whenever she talked to another one of their colleagues, Clive would hear her contagious laugh, listen to her stories from the loneliness of his small isolated desk.

She was a great storyteller. Managing her effects, adding plenty of details, adapting to her audience- it felt real. Clive could picture her stories, her adventures at the professor's side.

This was exactly what gave him a new idea, bright like always.

He came across her in the corridor, while she was heading to get herself a coffee. "Oh- Clivey ! It's been some time, hasn't it ?"

He gritted his teeth. This was a bright idea. He only had bright ideas. "Ignoring that first part. I wanted to tell you something."

She didn't seem all that excited, merely eyeing him up and down like they were in a box ring. "What- you want me to prove you wrong again ? Cuz I can do that-"

"No, no," he groaned, pinching the bridge of his nose. Why was she always so impulsive ? "I wanted to tell you that I submitted my article again, and the direction as well as the audience were really enthusiastic this time."

She seemed to relax, smiling instead. "That's great ! I'm happy for you."

"Also I added your name to it."

She... stopped smiling. In fact, she remained uncharacteristically silent, staring at him as if she was trying to see beyond his calm expression.

It was unsettling- deeply, extremely unsettling. It felt as though she could look at him and see everything he was hiding : his dead parents, his need for answers, his plan to get these files, his... his dead parents. There was nothing else he was hiding.

And yet, he felt his face go red under her scrutinizing gaze. Stupid, embarrassing shame.

"You helped me with the photography and the structure of the article, so it's only fair," he explained in a small voice, crossing his arms. He was not going to look at her. He was not going to meet her gaze and help her find whatever she was looking for. "And that's also why I'm here. I would like to offer you to- to work on a series of articles about the professor."

Clive still refused to watch her reaction, and it took another couple of seconds for Emmy to react : but when she did, she put her hands on her hips, leaning forward with a wide grin. Clive hated when she did that, it made him feel so small compared to her. She was also closer to him, which made him feel really... uncomfortable. And hot. "You want me to work on these ? With you, I suppose ?"

"Obviously," he scoffed, shrugging nonchalantly- or so he tried.

"...Why ?" She sounded concerned- curious too. There was something in her that wasn't sure about this project, and yet there was an even bigger part of her who wanted to get more out of this, to explore all the possibilities.

Clive couldn't care less about possibilities, or colleagues, or success : there was only one success that mattered to him, and it was getting these classified informations.

Which was exactly why he wanted to work with Emmy. Her proximity with Layton and, he'll admit it, her set of skills were perfect to help him reach his own goal. "Because you know a lot about the professor, and your stories are good material. Also, you could provide with pictures and- and presentation advices, I suppose. Probably," he muttered. She was still so close- should he step back ?

No, she would probably get offended. Oh well- he just had to keep standing inches from her, then.

She seemed amused. "I thought you weren't a Layton fan. Why are you asking me to tell you about him ?"

"He's a good inspiration for articles," he said, trying to sound professional- and why was he even trying ? This was professional. It was a professional setting. "Only an idiot would let this opportunity go."

"And you're not an idiot." She thought about it for a minute, before she shrugged : "Why not ! I'm here to create articles, after all. But first I need my coffee." She stretched her back before taking a few steps away, heading for her long-awaited beverage.

Clive felt... almost disappointed to see her leaving, but the unusual joy overcame it easily. She had accepted to work with him, they were gonna be a team- which meant that he was getting closer to achieving his goal. "Wait- want me to buy you a coffee ?"

She chuckled. "Don't ruin yourself for me, Clivey."

He didn't make any comment on the name.

-_-_-_-

Getting to work with Emmy was just delightful. She was as efficient as he was, both straight-forward in their criticism, always looking for ways to improve, listening to the other's suggestions before making up their minds. They made an exceptional team with perfect cohesion and excellent results.

Of course, the direction had noticed it too. Their articles were a hit among the newspaper's audience, even bringing in new customers : everyone was curious about this duo who wrote entertaining articles about some professor. It almost felt like fiction, and people liked to read these improbable stories that stood out from the rest of the usual news coverage.

The audience wanted more, the direction wanted more, and so Emmy and Clive logically decided to make more articles : day after day, week after week, they kept creating more and more stories, to the point that they would spend most of the day together- even the sacred coffee break.

"And that's how we found out that Descole really was behind all of this," Emmy finished her story, taking her cup of coffee in one hand. "I mean, I had my suspicions- but without the professor, I never would have guessed what was truly going on."

Clive nodded, absent-mindedly scribbling a few notes. His own cup had been left completely untouched, his coffee cold by now.

This detail didn't go unnoticed. "Cold coffee won't taste better, you know," Emmy joked.

Clive stopped writing, looking at his cup in silence.

Emmy frowned. "Hey, are you okay ?"

Clive looked at her, then at his notes. They were precise and neatly written at first, like always, before suddenly going... messy. Which was weird, because Clive hated messy.

"I just thought about something," he explained.

"Oh ?" She leaned forward on the table : her curious eyes were scanning Clive's face, waiting for any piece of information. Her coffee was left forgotten- it was disgusting anyway.

Clive brought his own cup to his lips, a poor attempt at hiding the blush on his face- because he was blushing, he knew that.

After all, this was exactly the something he had been thinking about.

It had taken him weeks to realize it. But surely enough, at some point, he had stopped listening to the stories and started listening solely to the voice telling them. He had stopped seeing work as a means to an end and started to look forward to seeing her in the morning, to sharing a coffee with her day after day.

He had even stopped caring about these stupid classified files. He would never stop being curious about the truth, wanting deep down to know what truly went down- but he could also portray his life in a world where he wouldn't get to know. Maybe he could never know, and still be okay, as long as he had another source of motivation.

Emmy. His work with her- scratch that. Just Emmy. He knew it was her and not these pointless articles : even the professor, his childhood hero, seemed to pale in comparison to her, recently.

He had wondered why the professor had made her his associate : now he knew, maybe even more than Layton himself.

"I was just- just thinking," he said, before taking a sip of coffee. It was cold, and bitter, and frankly disgusting : this newspaper should be able to afford better coffees, especially with all the records in sells recently. But this disgusting coffee allowed him to share a moment with Emmy, so maybe it was a bit okay. "About stuff."

"Very specific," Emmy mocked him, "Come on, spit it out !"

Oh, there was no way he was telling her. Admitting it -partly- to himself was already a big enough challenge. "I was- well, I was wondering if the professor was okay with us writing about his life."

Emmy rose an eyebrow, settling back in her chair. It really was just a game of getting closer and away, wasn't it ? "The professor doesn't mind. He is flattered someone is that invested in his adventures. He said he'd like to meet you, one day," Emmy simply answered, looking at him funny. There it was, that scrutinizing gaze that was looking for secrets, trying to uncover everything he wasn't saying- "But really, Clivey, we've been doing that for weeks. You only wonder about that now ?"

"I guess I didn't want this to stop, in case he was bothered," he simply said.

If Emmy noticed the way he passed up the opportunity to meet Layton himself, she didn't say a thing. "Ah, right. You're not an idiot, and you're not passing up any opportunities."

"Exactly," Clive said. He wasn't blushing anymore, so he put his coffee down- it was really too disgusting, anyway.

Emmy nodded. "We have enough for our next article. We should get back to work- you know, so you keep getting opportunities." She said this with a touch of humor, and Clive chuckled at it. It wasn't even that funny, but she had a way of making him happy that only worked with her : another colleague would have him rolling his eyes and spitting a distateful comment.

"Alright- I just need to go back to my desk first," he said, standing up and gathering his stuff.

In a fraction of second, Emmy was next to him. "Go get it, Tiger," she gently punched him in the shoulder. Uh, it'd been some time since she used that one.

"And Clive ?" She added. "I'm glad we took this opportunity. Together." And with that, she winked at him.

Clive stared dumbly at her, her words taking a minute to register : when they did however, he felt his whole face heating up in a way he couldn't possibly hide.

"I- uh- I mean-" He stuttered like an idiot, unable to form any thought. What did she mean by that ? Was this a friendly remark ? Or did she- did she also-

Was she also in love with him ? Because he was in love, madly. And maybe he hoped she was too.

He didn't know what miracle happened, but she left without any comments and he remained alone, his stuff in his hands and his heartbeat racing. He must look pathetic, being so red in the face and trembling because of a single remark. He was weak, weak for her, and what was left to be done ?

Luckily -a second miracle-, he didn't see any colleagues as he rushed back to his desk : if any of them had seen him like this, a trembling blushing mess, he probably would have no choice but to kill them.

Putting his stuff on one side of the desk, he himself dropped onto his chair, palms pressed against his face. Even now, even with his eyes closed, he could still see her beautiful smile, the way she winked at him-

No. No no no- he had to stop imagining stuff. There was no way she saw him as more than a colleague -a friend, maybe, emphasis on the maybe- and he would ruin everything if he couldn't respect her feelings on the matter. He didn't- he didn't actually need to- to date her- dating her, he was thinking about dating her and it sounded so wonderful, everything he could ask for, and-

No ! No, alright ? She wasn't interested, and he respected that. And he didn't need to date her, just getting to talk to her, to see her being so vibrant and passionate and confident, a real force of nature- just that was enough. He didn't need more.

He was happy with just getting to see her.

He dropped his hands, taking a deep breath. His heartbeat was still a bit fast, but it was returning to normal : even the red on his face was gone. It was alright. He would be alright, as long as he could keep things as they were.

And if he wasn't entirely satisfied with the way things were, if he kept longing for more, then it was his problem.

He opened his eyes, only to notice a white envelope on the middle of his desk. It... hadn't been there before. Who had put this here ?

Curious if not wary, he got closer and took the sheet of paper, turning it around in his hand.

On the front, he could read "Access to classified files granted"

[masterjedilenawrites]

The Batch Family: The Ninth of September

Part of my Bad Batch AU: "The Batch Family" [Collection Masterlist].

Word count: 990 | Batch ages: Multiple

Note: Since 9/9 obviously has to be the Batch boys' birthday, thought I'd take the opportunity to write a little something about it. It's been so long since I've written for this family, I miss them...

The Ninth of September | Celebrating the boys' birthdays through the years...

Their first birthday had been a spectacle. Beth had only had them for a few months at that time. She'd made it through the summer with them, working limited hours at her job in order to figure out a home routine, and thus sacrificing a lot just to ensure her new family got off to a decent start. But though there was still progress to be made for stability by the time September 9th rolled around, all of her family, friends, and apparently whoever else felt like it, still insisted on showing up, using the boys' birthday as a pretense for ogling her anomaly of a family.

Her mom hadn't yet gotten over her disapproval of the situation, pointing out every little mess in her home, and questioning every little decision Beth made for the boys. Her friends stood awkwardly about, treating her like she was a different person, like they'd never met her before and didn't know what to say. Her dad kept trying to slip her some cash, while the one set of grandparents she still had left were less subtle in their efforts to talk about her financial situation. And then there were plenty of faces she didn't recognize that had somehow wandered in, acting as if it was their business to be there, casting judgment and whispering comments under their breaths.

Thus, their second birthday was much more private.

Though the people in Beth's life had quieted down by then, she still chose to ignore any questions about planning a party and allowed herself to enjoy a birthday with her sons in peace. Well, in as much peace as five 2-year-old toddlers could manage. They ended up making a disaster of the kitchen as she tried using their help to make a cake. Flour on noses and batter on the walls, the whole bit. It was the most fun she'd ever had with them, the first time she gave herself permission to stop caring about being perfect. She would remember their unrestrained laughter and squeals of glee for years.

The next several birthdays were similarly private and energetic. She couldn't afford gifts and there never seemed to be enough friends for parties, so she made up for it with creative activities to make the day special. Crafts or games were the go-tos, with an occasional movie as they got older and could sit still longer.

Their ninth birthday was the "golden birthday," when their age matched the date, and that year she did splurge a bit and took them to see a soccer game in one of the bigger cities. That was the moment that started it all, the soccer obsession that would overtake their lives for the next several years. All she had wanted to do was distract them from the revelation they'd had earlier that year, about their birth parents and the fact that Echo's birthday was technically two weeks earlier and she'd pretended otherwise this whole time just to keep them from questioning the past until they were ready to understand it. And as a consequence she'd now have to deal with them being distracted by sports every day for the next decade. Oh well.

It wasn't until the were in the double-digits that she started inviting others again. She'd been back on good terms with her parents for a while but they had moved and visits simply weren't as convenient. But with the boys making more friends as they got older, she very well couldn't be that mom who deprived them of what everyone else had, and everyone else had birthday parties. Sure, the decorations were from the dollar store, and the only food she could offer was cheap pizza and a generic sheet cake from Costco, but young kids didn't care about such things. The fact they could say they had a party, and could be allowed to run around with their friends doing who-knew-what, that was enough.

Eventually, teenage angst got in the way, as it often did, so their fifteenth birthday was another tumultuous one. No one could agree on what do to celebrate. Wrecker and Echo wanted to keep things the same and just invite people over. Tech wanted to have more of an interesting outing, such as going to the newly opened cornfield maze. Hunter seemed embarrassed to want to do anything, and Crosshair was set on being contrary and arguing against any idea that was thrown out.

Beth had tried her hand at making a cake again, as a surprise, but ended up being so exhausted with their quarreling that she went to bed early for the night. The boys discovered the cake in the fridge later and felt awful, but not quite enough to snap out of their brooding, bickering personas just yet. No, those would continue to fester for a while longer.

But the nice, fun birthdays got back on track the following year, giving the Batch house a few more years of shared memories before they grew up too much. Eventually they graduated, started traveling, moving away, turning into adults with ambitions and futures. Birthdays wouldn't look quite the same after that.

All Beth could do was cherish the memories... and enjoy her flowers. She wasn't sure who started the tradition - she suspected Echo - but after the first year they had all been apart for their birthday in their twenties, they each started sending her flowers, every September 9th. Even though she hadn't been the one to give birth to any of them, they still felt she deserved some recognition for all the years she'd tried to give them a special day, even amidst any chaos or financial struggle or social awkwardness.

And toward each other, they'd acknowledge their shared day with nothing more than a simple Happy Birthday text in the group chat... Except Echo, who'd teasingly text back, Guess you guys forgot my birthday again...

~ ~ ~

The Batch Family Tag: @damerondala, @dangerousstrawberrypie, @pandora-the-halfling, @misogirl828, @darkangel4121, @sobstea, @rintheemolion, @dionysuskid21, @jesseeka, @hanbetired, @harleyevanstan, @imabeautifulbutterfly, @sarahtanmarvel, @itsagrimm, @lackofhonor, @error6gendernotfound, @theclonesdeservebetter, @hannahhearttcw, @kaijusplotch, @salaminus, @theroguesully, @reading02, @techie-bear, @not-a-big-slay, @nekotaetae, @the-mom-friend-dot-com, @pickle-rick-y, @flowered-bicycles, @droids-you-are-looking-for, @sleepycreativewriter

(Join my tag list here)

[arsenalgbt]

Dudeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee that was amazing! Love the snippet into Ben's life with Ethan and I'm really glad that he started threapy pre-meeting Willo. Ethan's bond with Kieran and how much notice Ben takes of it made my heart shatter a little for him, thise Ethan and Tomás playdates probably mean so much to him. Also Willo's lead in being "cute baby' before saying he hadn't seen Ben around before is very fun. Willo wanted to get to know Ben regardless and Willo was probably one of the first people who Ben can remember wanting to get to know him (/flirt with him) after learning about the baby. Ben wasn't ready for anything with Willo but it was nice to feel wanted. God you're mind is so powerful and your writing is so good!

- 💙🤍 KT anon

You're timing for posting that is INSANE! I just sat down with tea to work on the uni au and now I'm going to read this and feel things and I'm so excited! I shall be back to yell about it in a few mins! - 💙🤍 KT Anon

yasss feed me with the uni au update soon~

was written in a whim, cuz I needed an outlet after a trying week lmao. ofc it's gonna be single mum generational wealth ben and his baby boy Ethan teeheeeeee. the therapy helps immensely, he still takes it even after he's letting willo in in his life. ben is rly determined to do his best!! THANK YOU. glad you enjoyed it! should have added when Ethan said his first word, which ofc would be mummy, despite everything 🥰🥰🥰

[georgieluz]

Hey

do you write any fan fictions? If so do you think you could give us a little overview of what you’re currently working on? No pressure.

hello! thanks for the ask, i do indeed write fic! ofc i can give you an overview of what i'm working on atm :) i tried to not make this too long as it's just an overview, but feel free to ask me to expand on any of these! i do actually wanna talk more about my fic but i just never know if people wanna read posts about it or just wait until i upload the fic itself. do people want extracts? information about aus? character stuff? idk??? lemme know if you wanna know more, i'm chucking in a read more too bc it got a bit long

a hbo war f1 au. [working title: you're crashing, but you're no wave]. okay, so this is probably the biggest scale thing i'm working on atm. it's multi-chaptered and atm i've been writing it in an almost serialised format, since it's got quite a few narrative strands and numerous characters from both band of brothers and the pacific. i probably would have included some gen kill characters too, but i hadn't watched the show when i was planning and starting to write this, and i don't wanna add too much more into it, so i've stopped myself. i've written a lot for this one and i'm considering posting a few chapters soon. if you wanna know about any character's role in this one feel free to send me another ask because i'd love to talk about them more!! some are drivers (we've got rookies, seasoned drivers, eight-time world champions, the lot!!), some are behind the pit wall in management and engineering roles, some are retired drivers, etc etc. but yeah, it's andy haldane's final season before he plans to retire and let's just say the racing world has decided it's going to be the most chaotic yet! i'll drop some clues about what it entails: snafu and liebgott scrapping their way into weekly dnfs until one of them is kicked from the team. rookie driver eugene sledge having to deal with the consequences. webster somehow making it into his dream team with his dream teammate, yet, his focus remains on beating one person and one person alone. eddie jones is the very successful (and very hot) team principal of andy's rival team. hoosier is there being his usual self. leckie is the f1 journo who somehow knows everything about everyone and boy, the fans love it. we also have the much-loved fan favourite george luz and his race day engineer carwood lipton! retired-world-champion-now-team-principal dick winters and his ex-teammate boyfriend lewis nixon! and i also have a fair few OCs for this au, they aren't written romantically with any of the boys though, but i love them a lot! i might do a post about them later.

next up, is my k-company space pirates au! [working title: one way trigger (step inside the sun)] ok so it probably won't sound very piratey right now, but stick with me, ok? this is actually the one i'm enjoying writing the most right now. i've drafted all the chapters (6-8 depending on whether i cut this one incident or not) and i've written a lot for this too, so i'll probably be posting this one first. very basic synopsis: eddie jones is an expert in data retrieval. eddie jones is also on the run, and a very, very wanted man. maybe the most wanted fugitive in the galaxy. through an unfortunate twist of fate, romus burgin has been dragged along for the ride. andy haldane was a highly respected intergalactic officer, a captain loved by his men and the authorities above them alike. he also risked it all to aid in their escape. now, he's harbouring them both on his grandfather's old and battered ship, picking up a small ragtag team along the way. whilst they're trying to lay low, a distress call, with a code embedded into the message, is sent directly to the ship. one of the team recognises the code and realises it could only have come from one other person in the whole universe, someone asking for his help, someone he could never say no to. it's the worst time, possibly ever, for them to go on a rescue mission but somehow that's what they're doing.

then we have, an early 2000s battle of the bands au. this is mostly band of brothers, but a few people from one company in the pacific does have a role in the narrative, i'll leave that as a surprise though. basically, george luz enters his newly formed garage band into the campus annual battle of the bands competition, certain that they have a decent enough chance at winning. his bandmates disagree. especially after they see who they're up against. this is actually my other favourite to write at the moment! maybe even more so than the k-company space pirates one. it's a chaptered fic, but i'm trying to keep it contained and not super super long. i'm hoping to keep it at around 6-8 chapters max, but i have a bad habit of not sticking to my drafts, so we'll see. but yeah, i'm having a lot of fun with this and feel free to ask me about who the band members are and other roles that other characters will have!

call it fate, call it karma. aka, my 'eddie jones made it home from the war, but andy haldane did not' oneshot. i'm almost finished writing it, i just have a fair bit of editing to finish up.

the ballroom extravaganza. my winnix spy au! the intelligence officer to secret agent pipeline is too real and lew must suffer the consequences, i'm afraid! i've got this drafted and partially written as a two-shot but it's begging to be expanded on, so i've got it waiting in limbo right now, whilst i decide what i'm gonna do. someone make the decision for me please?

i have two male OCs that i've written for liebgott and nixon, if you wanna know more about them then i'm happy to talk about them and introduce them, but i'm not sure how much people would wanna know so i'll wait.

i have another OC based off a friend that i'm almost finished writing a thing for, i just have to change some things to fit the overall series better.

i also have a silly little thing that i wrote up bc i got depressed and hyperfixated on the tv show bondi rescue for the last two weeks resulting in me basically planning a whole bondi rescue lifeguard au for the pacific boys. i have no idea if anyone other than me would be into that so it'll probably stay in my scrivener files lmao

then i just have some vague gen kill things partially planned but they need a lot more work before they see the light of day lmao. but yes, they're all fucking bradnate. apart from the one bradnatemike thing that my brain begged me to consider, which i promptly gave in to right away.

anyway, sorry i know that was supposed to be an overview but it turned into a very long overview. oops.

[destiny-fics]

To All The Boys I've Loved Before

[Ji Changmin x Fem!reader]

Pairing: Ji Changmin x Fem!reader

Genre: College!au, To All The Boys I've Loved Before au

Summary: Ever since you were 10 years old, you had been writing love letters to the boys you fell for. From Park Seonghwa to Bang Chan you had poured your heart out onto pale pink paper, detailing every single emotion in your head and your heart. You never sent the letters though, for they weren't to be read. And it would stay that way. Until your younger sister came to visit you.

Warnings: swearing, kind of an invasion of privacy, no smut this chapter but there will be in later chapters for minors please dni.

General Taglist: @hiseu @yeosayang @avyskai @whatudowhennooneseesyou @foxdaisy @lickslixie @maskedmochiii

Series Taglist: @calliopegoist @smuchsmut @ilikepalta @heednpy @ilovechanhee @quiltykissed @sanghak-enthusiast  

Part of the To All The Boys I've Loved Before Series

Series Masterlist 

Words can be incredibly powerful in the hands of one who knows how to use them.

They can start and finish wars, break up relationships, cause pain and anger and heartbreak or cause pure joy and happiness, a satisfaction or a warm feeling which blooms inside your chest like the feeling of drinking a hot chocolate on a cold winter's day.

You liked to believe you were able to harness your words into something which was powerful, even if you didn't want anyone to ever know just what you had to say. 

You'd always flown under the radar, something that you were okay with and honestly almost expected being the middle of three sisters. Your oldest sister was incredibly intelligent, the valedictorian of both her high school and college graduating classes and your younger sister was the textbook definition of an extrovert. Popular, friendly and yet would still sit with you on a Friday night watching some cheesy romance movie you'd both pretend to hate even if you actually really enjoyed it.

You suppose that was where the letters came from.

As much as you would have liked to, you knew that you'd never say any of your feelings out loud, especially romantic ones. And you had to admit, it was kind of movie-like to write those letters, even if the intended recipients wouldn't ever read them.

The first letter was addressed to Park Seonghwa. He was the first boy you'd ever fallen in love with. At 10 years old you were almost one hundred percent sure that you and Seonghwa were going to get married and so you'd written a letter to him and then put it in an old hat box. 

The second letter, for Lee Minho, your high school best friend. At least he was until he moved away halfway through your junior year. Minho was your first kiss, the product of a spin the bottle game at a high school party and that had kind of changed things for your friendship, but before either of you could do anything he moved away, leaving your feelings for him to just live in a letter for the rest of time.

Your third letter had been addressed to Kevin Moon, your fellow councillor at the Summer camp you'd both worked at before your senior year. You weren't entirely sure what it was about him that had your heart hammering in your chest. Maybe it was the way he was so good with the campers, maybe it was the way he played piano and sang to you when everyone else had gone to sleep, maybe it was the way he took you behind the councillor's cabin late at night to ask you if you'd be his girl. Or perhaps it was just the light-headedness you'd been experiencing from the heat. But whatever it was, it had prompted you to write a letter and add it to the pile tucked into your hat box.

The next letter was for Ji Changmin, the boy you'd kissed under the mistletoe at your senior class' Christmas party. 

You hadn't even wanted to go to the party, but your friend had managed to convince you, only to leave you to nurse your drink in the corner all alone.

That's when Changmin approached you.

"I don't usually see you at these things." 

You snorted softly and took a sip of your drink "that would be because I don't usually go to these things." 

"You should," he smiled, leaning against the wall. "Parties look good on you."

You raised an eyebrow "I'm standing in the corner drinking alone." 

"That's not true, you're standing with me," he grinned.

"Oh yeah, and I'm so enjoying that." 

"Then you'll be enjoying it even more when I let you know that you've been standing underneath mistletoe for the past fifteen minutes and now I'm standing underneath it with you." 

You looked up and swore under your breath as you caught sight of the plant, looking back at Changmin who was still grinning at you. "You don't really think I'm going to honour that dumb tradition, do you?" 

"I mean you don't have to, but I'd really like it if you did. I mean, for the sake of tradition and all." 

You rolled your eyes and grabbed the front of Changmin’s dress shirt, bringing his lips to yours. 

You'd gone home that night and written another letter. 

And for a while that was the last letter you'd written.

Until now.

Because from Minho to Changmin there had been someone else that you'd been in love with, someone that you couldn't have, no matter what. 

Bang Chan.

Your older sister’s boyfriend.

Was it bad practice to fall in love with your sister’s boyfriend? Absolutely yes it was. But you had found over the years that you really couldn't help who you fell for, the heart was just funny like that.

Besides, you had known him first. But over the course of your sister's relationship with him, you'd let your feelings for Chan fade.

Until your younger sister had come to visit, relaying news of the couple's separation and now all of those feelings which you had bottled down over the years were flowing back out again, completely uncensored onto the pale pink paper you had bought specifically for the letters. Sighing, you signed it and put it inside its envelope, placing it atop the other letters inside the hat box. You placed the box back on your shelf before flopping into your bed with a sigh. 

"What are you sighing for? It's my last night here. We should be celebrating, not moping about." 

You rolled your eyes before flicking them over to your younger sister who was standing in the doorway of your room "I'm not moping." 

"You are too," she waltzed over to your bed before flopping next to you. 

"Come on, what would I even have to mope about?" 

"It wouldn't have to do with a certain Bang Chan and his newly ended relationship with our sister would it?" 

You scoffed, even though you knew your sister could see right through it. Your eyes flicked to your wardrobe where you knew the letters were and shook your head "What makes you say that?" 

"Come on, don't bullshit me. You're practically in love with him."

"I am not practically in love with him. That was a long time ago."

"Right," she snorted. "So you're not moping about him on my last night here?" 

"Nope. No moping, not from me." 

"Well then, you won't mind getting dressed up and coming with me to the bar to celebrate, because you're not moping of course." 

You sighed and sat up, looking back toward your wardrobe "of course." 

She grinned and quickly pushed you into the bathroom to get ready, something about not wanting to be late and have all the cute guys already spoken for. You just let her, laughing at her dramatics.

~

As much as you liked to pretend that your sister was annoying, her departure from your apartment was met with many tears and lots of hugging.

"Please don't stay away too long, our door's always open," you sniffled softly, your sister patting your hair. 

"I won't, I promise. Although I doubt you’ll have time to miss me. I have a feeling things will get pretty interesting for you soon enough." 

You pulled away with a raised eyebrow but before you could ask what she meant by that, she got into the awaiting taxi, leaving you lonely once again. 

You sighed, waving her off before adjusting your bag back on your shoulder and heading to class, still pondering over what your sister had meant by her parting words. 

You found out relatively quickly as none other than Ji Changmin approached you, something clutched tightly in his hands.

"Y/n Y/l/n right? Hey." 

You raised an eyebrow nodding slowly "Ji Changmin. To what do I owe the pleasure?" 

"I uh...got your letter. And I'm really sorry, but I just don't feel the same way."  

"I'm sorry? What letter?"  

Changmin gave you a questioning look as he showed you the envelope, "Uh this one? The one you sent me." 

Your eyes widened as you took in the envelope of the letter. The letter you'd written with the intention of no one ever seeing it. The letter that was now in Ji Changmin's hands. 

Oh shit.

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[solarsavoy]

Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers. Let’s spread the self-love ❤

That's so hard, I've so many! But I think I've figured it out, my top 5.

Assassin Skills Required

By far my favorite fic I've written, even now. It was based off a dream and includes characters from Krystar while focusing on the AC characters. I didn't know where I was going with it until I was halfway done, so it was written and posted live, consistently. It went from Saturdays only to Saturdays and Wednesdays and somehow I kept up the whole time thru 3 works of it. As a debut for fanfiction, it's simply the best, and I haven't been able to recreate my experience with it since. Writing live was just so... I can't believe I did it. Not once did I miss an update and it wasn't even prewritten. In fact, I outpaced my posting schedule, even after starting to post a second day each week. I'd never been so inspired than when writing ASR. Picking the top 5 is hard, but picking number 1 is easy. Link to ASR teaser.

Kristmas Karma

This one wasn't quite written live, but it wasn't written that far ahead either, and it includes a ridiculous amount of art all drawn the week before it was posted. I can't believe it was more or less posted on time. It was also partially an experiment. While ASR included all the AC characters, I still didn't know them that well individually outside of Karmagisa. Kristmas Karma changed that. I was able to write and understand nearly every single student's POV convincingly, and still reference the fic to this day when trying to feel them out. It still makes me cry and Christmas Day, despite being the single most longest chapter I've ever written, so long it was split into 2 chapters (23k words btw), still flies right by every time I reread it. Link to KK prelude.

Magic Shuu

Speaking of getting to learn about the other characters in AC, this one focuses on Shuu and the five virtuosos. What I love most about this one is how fluidly I've crossed these boys into the Sailor Moon universe. I love how I turn this very minor character and his even more invisible friends into the main stars and make them relatable. In fact, my friend who has a similarly overbearing father relates to Shuu deeply. This story just has so much heart in it. Currently unfinished, but I'll finish it someday, even if it takes me years. Link to first chapter.

Ubisoft

A Karushuu one-shot. It's playful and fun and both of them are such loveable dorks in this. XD I've reread it so many times I've lost count. My favorite part for Karma is when he stumbles out the door in the morning, tripping and nearly breaking his phone on the way. My favorite part for Shuu is how awkward his attempt to be a better kisser is. I love them so much in this. Link to Ubisoft.

Cuddles and Kisses

A Karmagisa one-shot that I'd planned to write for the longest time. It was based on an idea that someone else had, but it's surprisingly sweet and wholesome despite it being about Karma summoning an incubus. XD My favorite part for Nagisa is when he attempts to "seduce" Karma. My favorite part for Karma is when he rushes home because he's worried about Nagisa disappearing, frantically searching the house until he calls out Nagisa's name, and then hugging him in relief when he appears before him. It's just so sweet for a one-shot, and I'm strongly considering writing more for this AU. Link to Cuddles and Kisses.

Honorable mention:

Gerit

An original story set in the Krystar universe but separate from the main story. It's actually my favorite of anything on AO3, but it's technically not a fanfiction. It centers around a neurodivergent named Gerit who was abused in many ways as a child while training to be an assassin. I wrote this in the midst of writing ASR as Gerit was in the story and I hadn't fleshed him out as a Krystar character yet. It's finished, but not all posted on AO3 as I've decided the tiny Krystar spoilers at the end aren't something I should spoil until at least after book 1 or 2 of the Fragment series is out. Still, feel free to check it out. Not for the faint of heart, rated MA. Link to Gerit.

Thank you Anon, for sending me this ask. I hope my favorite reads can get some views from this. 💙

[azikarue]

2023 Fic Recap

Little late with the recap this year, but it's still January, right? For now?

Going into 2023, my goals were to 1) update "Bliss", 2) participate in MayBlade, and 3) work on/finish some WIPs. Poor "Bliss" is still waiting for its chance, but two out of three isn't bad!

I'll ramble more at the end of the post, but here's a recap of everything I posted in 2023.

❖

A Kiss for Luck

Summary: Before his crucial battle against Mystel, Max takes a moment to center himself. He wasn't expecting company. Set in my Saint Shields in G-Rev AU. Pairing: Max/Mariam Chapters: 1/1 Words: 1,855 Rated: K+

This fic was the first of six short oneshots I wrote to commemorate Valentine's Day. I did something similar in 2021, where I wrote a handful of Max/Mariam kisses and published them during the week leading up to Valentine's Day. When I was planning my writing for 2023, it felt like something fun to tackle again, and it gave me a lighthearted and relaxed start to the year writing-wise. So, I ignored my entire list of goals and wrote this (plus the next five) based off of six kiss tropes. I chose a different pairing for each.

For this one, I indulged myself doubly by starting with Max/Mariam and by setting it in my Saint Shields in G-Rev AU. Ever since I started pondering this AU, the moment in this fic is one that I knew had to happen. I'm sure the Saint Shields would have a lot to say about BEGA. I'm also sure that Mariam would remember the lessons she learned from Max and would be happy to throw them back in his face when he needs it most. And I love the excuse to visit early Max/Mariam days, even if it's in an AU setting. I write so much about them as adults that it always feels refreshing to write a little closer to their roots. This one holds a special place in my heart.

❖

A Kiss on a Scar

Summary: Every mark on Tala's body has a story and Julia does her best not to ask questions. She doesn't always succeed. Pairing: Tala/Julia Chapters: 1/1 Words: 1,883 Rated: T

When I chose this trope, I knew exactly which ship I would write for it. I was glad to have more practice with these two after writing them for a couple of my MayBlade 2022 chapters. For some reason, I tend to shy away from any member of the Blitzkrieg Boys when I write. I think it's partially because they have such a strong fan base and I'm never sure how my personal image of them will rate. Honestly, I've spent so many years in the fandom focusing on more underrated characters that I'm not even sure I have fully developed ideas for the Blitzkrieg Boys. Tala/Julia feels more niche, though, like it's a safe place for me to play around in.

While writing this, I was a little unsure on characterization. Namely, how much Tala would share without prompting and how much Julia would prompt him. I think there's still some gaps in Tala's character arc between seasons that I need to fill in mentally. He's very open with Tyson when discussing BEGA and Boris. I can only assume that's some combo of righteous anger and maybe therapy? Or just figuring himself out now that he's free from Biovolt's clutches. Julia is a bit of a mystery, too. Mostly, I worry that I'll end up writing her too similarly to other female characters on accident. Reading this fic back, I don't dislike the way I wrote them. And it was a stage in their relationship that I hadn't written before this point, so I enjoyed it a lot!

❖

A Kiss with Red Lipstick

Summary: Usually Queen has more fun at Enrique's family parties. But she usually doesn't have to go out of her way for his company or spend the night stone cold sober either. Pairing: Enrique/Queen Chapters: 1/1 Words: 1,784 Rated: M

This chapter was just me writing for me. I was pleasantly surprised when it got more than a single note when I posted it on Tumblr, because I know this is such a random ship with an, arguably, even more random interpretation. These are the two I write about when I want messy drama and chaos. Red lipstick kisses feel very messy and chaotic, so here we are.

This falls into the same story line as the last Enrique/Queen fic I wrote. It was fun building upon that idea.

❖

A Kiss at the Beach

Summary: Salima gets caught staring. It lands her in deep water…so to speak. Pairing: Ray/Salima Chapters: 1/1 Words: 1,180 Rated: T

I'll never turn down the chance to write some cutesy Ray/Salima. I imagine the two of them traveling around together a lot, living an almost nomadic lifestyle between tournaments or stops home (to White Tiger Hills or Salima's apartment). It's always a treat to indulge in that line of thinking, especially for a sweet moment like this.

❖

A Kiss to Shut Her Up

Summary: Mariah has a talent for uncomfortable conversations. Rick's working on his strategy for getting out of them. Pairing: Rick/Mariah Chapters: 1/1 Words: 1,253 Rated: T

This was one of my favorites when I wrote this series, and I still love it a year later. At the risk of sounding like a broken record, I love writing Rick and Mariah's dynamic, especially from Rick's in-denial, grumpy point of view. He's a fun character in general, and I love how Mariah is the perfect person to keep him on his toes. And I had the line about her climbing him like a tree in reserves for what feels like forever, so it was nice to finally give it a home.

❖

A Kiss for the Winner

Summary: Tyson wins another World Championship and Hilary needs a minute to process his reaction. Pairing: Tyson/Hilary Chapters: 1/1 Words: 1,987 Rated: K+

I remember agonizing over this fic because I didn't want Tyson or Hilary to feel out of character. I've written a fair bit of TyHil since then, so I think that worry has subsided somewhat, but it was VERY REAL when I wrote this. I think the fact that the fic centers around a disagreement added to that anxiety. Arguments can be tricky. I didn't want it to feel like they resolved things too quickly to be believable or that Hilary's feelings were dismissed. In the end, I'm very happy with how it turned out.

❖

Subtly Sweet

Summary: When Hilary's computer crashed, she hoped work would be a distraction. Instead, she has a run-in with a vending machine and finds an unlikely hero in Tyson. Now if only he wasn't such a royal pain. Pairing: Tyson/Hilary Chapters: 1/1 Words: 4,320 Rated: K

I have this fic to thank for being able to tick my "work on/finish some WIPs" box in 2023. Very grateful to it for the feeling of accomplishment it gave me. 😄

For a fic that was sitting as a WIP for a year, it cleaned up nice! As a WIP, it was mostly dialogue with some vague outlining that I'd started, then left hanging. Sometimes pinpointing the perfect dialogue to take a plot from Point A to Point B can be a struggle, so when I reread my notes, I knew I had to take advantage of a good thing while I had it. The phone call scene wasn't originally included, and I remember doing a healthy amount of tweaking to get it right, but once it was there I couldn't imagine the story without it.

Fun fact: The original spark of an idea for this fic came from a conversation with RedWheeler literal years ago. I can't remember if we were discussing TyHil specific songs, but "Tangled Up In Me" by Skye Sweetnam came up and I couldn't get the thought of Hilary kicking a vending machine out of my head. Also, how is that song 20 years-old already?

❖

Life in Color

Summary: A collection for MayBlade 2023. Pairing: Multiple Chapters: 31/31 Words: 65,225 Rated: Varies (everything from K to M)

The pièce de résistance of my year. 💎

I, once again, did not finish my MayBlade entries on time. Unlike my first try, I accepted the fact that I would fall behind ahead of time. I think it made me feel much less stressed overall, but it also might have contributed to me falling behind faster than before? It's a double-edged sword. I know that I was in a better place for this round than I was when writing "Just A Moment", though. Life was much more balanced and I gave myself time to rest and recoup in between chapters, as needed, rather than spending all hours writing, editing, and falling asleep on my keyboard.

I'm very proud of this collection. I love challenging myself to write about some of my favorite, underappreciated characters alongside some of the characters more typical to my fics. I think I said this last year, too, but I love to see which chapters people like best and how it can vary between FFN and Tumblr. Sometimes I'm surprised by how things play out. Like, I was very shocked that the first chapter was so well-received on Tumblr, seeing as it focused on the Saint Shields. I'm sure it was because it was Day 1 of the event, but it was nice to know that some of my favorite characters got their time to shine. That was the case for more than one chapter, and I'd write a slew of notes on them all if it wouldn't make this post way too long.

All in all, I saw more engagement on "Life in Color" versus "Just A Moment" and I'm so grateful to anyone who read or interacted with it in some way! 🤍

❖

As I reflect on 2023, I can acknowledge that I took some positive steps forward in my never-ending quest for balance.

I'm teaching myself every day that it is okay to let go of things without guilt and pick them back up later. I can't be everything or do it all 100% of the time, and that's all right. It doesn't have to be all or nothing, and I can start things without having any idea of when I'll finish them. I can take a break from things that aren't serving me or causing more stress than I can handle. I can choose myself first and follow my whims. I can log off and be present.

In 2024, I don't know what my fanfic uploads will look like. I'd like to update Bliss and work on more WIPs. MayBlade is up in the air. I love participating, but it always turns into a bigger production than I bargain for. I may just need to participate differently, if I choose to do so.

September thru December are notoriously busy months for me, with May and June getting honorable mention. I'm not saying I'll be totally absent those months. Just putting it out there for me, so I know to go easy on myself. If I do nothing but read and take day trips and spend quality time with the people (and animals!) I love during that time, then it will be a year well spent. 🤍

As always, thank you to everyone who has interacted with any of my uploads this year and to the people who cheer me on and feed my fandom fire. I appreciate this little circle of the internet so, so much, and I hope 2024 brings only the best to you all! 🥰

[hurricane-heatt]

FIRSTLY i do not know how i hadn't seen your ao3 before now and i'm losing my MIND i'm about to read it all bc i just read casualty of you and now i'm SCREECHING secondly... the fic writer questions: 11, 4, 30, 49! x

FIRSTLY AWAHHHH THABK YOU SO SO MUCH!!!! i hope u enjoy <3333

secondly gonna stick these answers below the cut!!! just because i started rambling ehe

11- Are you partial to a certain character/pairing or are you more equal-opportunity? If you are partial to any character/pairing, why do you think that is?

oh absolutely pairing-wise it will always be sebmark for me… i think i am just entirely struck by the different phases of their relationship? 2009 is an entirely different vibe to 2013 who is an entirely different vibe to 2017 and that makes fic writing them sooo fun for me its never a chore to write sebmark. beyond this teammate rivalries are just absolutely compelling to me i think the dynamics and intricacies are so so interesting, especially gaining more insight on that from marks book was just eeeee i loved it (fuck u helmut marko for everything you ever do). personality wise too they both suit each other well in terms of rpf and they dynamics that i’ve always written and like writing.

character wise i love writing seb. i rlly hope i do him justice because i just love his voice and his humour and his mannerisms. he’s my love ever and i love him so any pairings with him in i am always heart eyes over.

4 - What detail in [insert fic] are you really proud of?

i’m gonna take this as any fic i’ve written so! i think anything in good men die too verse i am hugely proud of. i did a bit of research for crush about street racing (a lack of in thoroughfare which i often get annoyed about but oh well) and so i think i got the car types right. either way it sounds professional so shrug!

an unreleased fic i have a bit of detail on is my siren!seb fic, its entirely unfinished but i did some research about mythology surrounding mermaids and sirens and think it’s pretty good in that!!!

30 - Have you ever written something that was out of your comfort zone? If so, what was it, and how did it affect your approach to writing fic thereafter?

oh boy most of my ot3 fest fics (i have three fulfilled hopefully! haha 3) were quite a new experience. i won’t spoil a ton but writing threesomes is hard man. lots of limbs

49 - What are you currently working on? Share a few lines if you’re up for it!

ehehehe. its a another fucking sebmark au! heir to father’s business seb nearly gets assassinated and his driver mark (annoying, gets in the way, keeps making fun of him) saves his life and thus is made his bodyguard in order to protect him. he hates mark already but this really pisses seb off, a constant shadow. also it’s called bad for business yes like the sabrina carpenter song

it’s going to be my first multi chapter and i’m anxious as balls about it and i really kind of hate the tone at the minute so it needs reworking. first chap is basically done but want three written before i post anything just for my own sanity. but here’s a little snippet of them winding each other up

+

Why has Britta put the medicine on the top shelf, for fuck’s sake, she knows he’s not that tall. He gets on his tiptoes, but the box is pushed further back by the tips of his fingers, rather than grabbing it.

“Let me, Mr Vettel.”

And then, the lean body of Sebastian’s driver against the back of him, reaching up to the shelf with zero effort. His fingers dash against Sebastian’s, and it’s a much more successful retrieval, bringing down the box of pills to his height.

Sebastian turns, putting his back to the countertop, the bare skin under his hoodie just brushing the cool marble. He’s close enough that he can smell Webber’s cologne - sharp. Masculine. Like the rest of him, ever predictable.

Webber takes a short step back, probably assessing how abnormally close they were. He puts the box into Sebastian’s open palm. The pills shake inside upon impact. He’s pleased, but through gritted teeth, like a dog finally being allowed a treat.

“Thank you.”

“No problem.”

+

so yeah!!!! i rlly hope i do finish it and get it out because the idea has been brewing for months.

thank u so much for all the questions and ofc the love for casualty of you <33

[onward--upward]

Hi 🦀🦀 some Weird Asks for you: 18 (leaving it up to you to choose the passage), 25, 36 💞

HELLO BELOVED thank u!! 🦀🦀

25. What is a weird, hyper-specific detail you know about one of your characters that is completely irrelevant to the story?

i am going to take this opportunity to talk about my baby boy avery o'connor from steppin' into fate <3 <3

he has a bunch of spare toothbrushes in his bathroom for when friends stay over, in a variety of colours.

he hates beer (bold and controversial opinion for a hockey player.)

his crush on buck was sooooo obvious that it's a running joke on the Kings' social media. he is never ever escaping the obsessed-with-evan-buckley accusations

when he's a little more settled in the league and has a longer contract he goes out and adopts TWO dogs in the summer break. avery o'connor dog dad CONFIRMED

he absolutely goes out and gets a bf at some point i just haven't decided Whom or When

36. They say to Write What You Know. Setting aside for a moment the fact that this is terrible advice... what do you Know?

excellent question!!! the answer is Not A Whole Lot. I know.... terrible retail jobs? academia? oh!!! i know Hockey, but i've already written about that one!

i know Being Bisexual and Stupid, that's why i gravitate towards evan buckley <3

18. Choose a passage from your writing. Tell me about the backstory of this moment. How you came up with it, how it changed from start to end.

Okay this is my favourite question ever!!! I decided to go with the opening to my beloved soulmate AU, stitch my soul, because it was the story that i wrote over the longest period of time so i was interested to go back and see how it changed.

passage and the rest of the answer is under the cut because i don't want to clog up people's dashes <3

from the finished version:

For a long time, the crook of Eddie’s arm read only Ev. For such a long time, even, that his parents sometimes asked him if he was sure it hadn't settled yet. Maybe he had missed the signs. “It could be an unusual name, Eddie,” his mom says one night, when he’s been fighting with Shannon, his girlfriend who isn’t his soulmate, his girlfriend that his parents have never liked very much at all. “Ev. You never know, these days, what people are naming their children.” 

“It hasn’t settled,” he’d insisted, because you were supposed to know, when it did. And he’d never felt the shift, the one that you always see in movies when the music swells and everything falls into a sharp focus. There was no click, in his chest, nothing coming together. It just felt… unfinished. 

Unsettled. 

There are lots of potential reasons that a mark might take a long time to settle into your soulmate’s name. They make it seem like everyone settles right around the time they reach adulthood, but Eddie’s done the research, and he knows that plenty of people don’t settle that early. The experts don’t seem to be able to agree on why it takes longer, for some people. There’s no definitive explanation. And Eddie has never needed one. 

Because Shannon shows up on his doorstep at his parents’ house with a positive pregnancy test, and he marries her in a church that his parents pick out, and he enlists in the army because he’s 21 and terrified and he doesn’t have many employable skills. The scrawled Ev on the inside of his forearm doesn’t matter much, in the end, when he’s out there learning to have steady hands and quick problem-solving skills, and practising how to remove a bullet from beneath somebody’s skin. It doesn’t matter much when he’s flying home to cut the umbilical cord and meet his son and then shipping back out to the dust and the sand before any of it really starts to feel real. And he has Shannon – brave, beautiful Shannon. She’s never been his soulmate, and he’s never been hers. But he loves her. And he has Christopher, now, and he loves him, too. And whoever his Ev is, he doubts they would want… all of this, even if he was going to drop everything for them. Which he’s not. So it doesn’t matter. Hasn’t mattered, really, for a long time. He’s not sixteen years old anymore, watching the v fade in, sharp and kind of clumsy, deep black against his skin. He’s not that same kid who was Googling one of those lists that filled in common names to fill out your letters, skimming through them all, breath caught in his throat. Ev is kind of an unusual combination, really – nothing like Adriana’s first two letters, which had come in four days apart, spelling out Ma against her calf, and narrowed absolutely nothing down. Turns out Ev is even rarer when you filter by common names for Eddie’s geographical location. The possibilities used to fill up his head. Eva. Eve. Evelyn. 

(Everett. Evan. Evander. He tried to read those ones and forget them, but they lingered just as much. He shoved them to the back of his brain, where they couldn’t quite see the light of day.) 

But he isn’t that kid anymore. So he forgets about his letters altogether, for a while. Afghanistan is all his brain has room for, these days, and every spare space left over is filled by Chris. His team brings up soulmates on occasion, the usual locker room ribbing, trying to keep things lighthearted. He listens to cheesy romantic stories from those who’ve already found their match, the whining from those who are unlucky in their search. When the questions turn Eddie’s way, he brushes them off, and they mostly let him be. Nobody wants unhappy stories. There are enough of those out here. 

Eddie puts Ev aside. 

Christopher gets diagnosed with CP, Shannon is more and more stressed out every time they manage to speak to each other. He sees men and women die beneath his hands, and he wakes up some days to gunfire, and there’s no room anywhere for the little letters on his skin.

now, because i tend to write a lot of my first drafts by hand in notebooks, i actually have the first verison of this! (and my handwriting actually looks nice in this one, yay <3)

when i first wrote this i don't think i really had any idea where i was going with things, i was just thinking: soulmates, eddie's past with shannon, how does that work? and i just kind of sat down and went for it lol.

a lot of this survived to the final version! but it's missing a lot of connective tissue -- it's a much shorter version of the same passage. also i think it's interesting how in the original version i had eddie refering to his soulmate with she/her pronouns, where in the actual fic he always uses they/them even in his own head. this version of eddie i think always knew that his soulmate would be a guy, but shoved that wayyyy down where he didn't have to think about it. but it's one of those things that you do still know, even if you pretend you don't, so i'm glad i took the she/her pronouns out.

anyways i'm actually surprised how cohesive this original version is! a lot of my notebook first drafts include a lot of crossed out lines and false starts, especially if i don't really know where the story is going.

--

thank you my most beloved, i had wayyyy to much fun with these!!

here are the questions if anyone else wants to hear me ramble about writing <3

[snowsheba]

ALSO not to steal ur ask but at first i also wanted to ask you as many as you wanted to answer but your tags seemed so contemplative i didn't want to pry LOL but your ask has emboldened me so... any extras you haven't answered that you particularly want to share!

EHEHEHEHEHE

i love talking about myself. LOL. under cut to spare your dashboards

1. what's the fic you're most proud of?

"thanks dad, love hana" was a HUGE undertaking. kind of wild how far i went and how well i made it work looking back.

that said: i am most fond of my grand theft auto/aveyond crossover au. it's the exact brand of controlled chaos full of fun and angst and random shit that i crave, LOL.

2. what's a fic that took you to an emotional/dark/hard place?

answered!

3. what fic are you emotionally attached to?

answered!

4. what fic of your own do you read for comfort?

i wouldn't call them "fics," but i do have some long-form fic starring original characters that i wrote and read back pretty consistently because they are honestly excellent. i haven't posted them anywhere because they are super niche, but i can if people are curious.

5. what fic of your own won't you read?

LOL... the ones that remained buried in my external hard drive... they can stay there.

6. what's the hardest part of the writing process for you?

probably starting? this is why i start with writing the summary, because otherwise it gets weird when i start out. oftentimes i have like three or four false starts before i get into a groove that i like. (i save all the false starts, too! they often get reused and recycled later on in the story.)

7. how does receiving or not receiving feedback/support impact you?

tdlh's success kind of ruined the whole thing for me in some ways. on the one hand, you get accustomed to HUGE amounts of interaction, so having no interaction feels weird. on the other hand, there is so much interaction that it is overwhelming, and it's not good when responding to engagement becomes a chore.

before i wrote tdlh i craved feedback and support because mental eelness and whatever. afterwards... it really put into perspective who i was writing for. most often i wasn't writing for me, i was writing for others. now that i'm writing for myself, i don't need feedback or support in the same way.

i mean let's be clear though i still LOVE to get engagement in general. it feels good when people like the stuff i write!!

8. does anyone in your personal life know you write fic? if not, would you tell anyone?

my immediate family does, in the sense that they know i write it (i don't share it with them lol). my partner does as well! but otherwise very, VERY rarely do i let irl people know i write fic.

9. what's your writing process like?

answered!

10. how has writing positively impacted your mental health or overall mood?

writing saved my life! this is undoubtedly true. i would not be here if i hadn't started writing when i did for as long as i have.

these days it's less of a coping mechanism and more of a fun hobby, and i always feel good when i finish something off and post it. the satisfaction of a story well-written is wonderful.

11. Has a fic you’ve written ever caused issues/controversy?

BOY. OH YES. i learned a lot from the experience, too.

essentially: overwatch has two characters, one is [finger wiggles] hispanic and the other is white, the man of color is demonized and becomes this evil terrible terrorist (real original, blizzard) while the white dude becomes this righteous rogue vigilante. i kept these roles in the fic i wrote them in and people started talking about the racist implications of this. rightfully so because it IS racist. this isn't the only big thing, but this is the one that was focused on because people shipped these two pretty hard back in the day.

it draws an interesting line though - as a fic writer, i can change the canon and do whatever i want. but i didn't do that, because i wanted to stay true to canon. if you had asked me back then, i would have said that's a good reason to let it be, but these days, i would have if not addressed it directly then changed it as needed to both suit my purposes and also... not have racism baked in if possible...

it's tough when your source material is already problematic enough and its parent company is a literal shitshow of issues (here's a pretty good summary of events). i take responsibility for the harm that my particular rendition did, but i would be remiss if i didn't acknowledge that actively writing a fic that attempts to remain consistent with canon (i.e. i would change story beats 30 chapters down the line when new lore came out) is bound to be as problematic as the source material itself.

12. What’s your perfect environment to create/write?

answered!

13. Do you take pride in your writing, or does it embarrass you? Why?

i DO take pride in my writing. it also embarrasses me immensely.

i don't want to show my ass too much, but i grew up in a household where if i wasn't working on school stuff i'd get punished, so obviously my parents hated how much time i spent writing. there was a lot of shame that went along with it because of the whole "why does it even matter? it's not original fiction" thing as well, so i am very protective of my fanworks and don't advertise them at all irl. because it's embarrassing to explain myself over and over again to people who really don't care, LOL.

of course, these days my parents love to fawn about how good of a writer i am and make me write the yearly christmas newsletters and whatever, but that's parents for you!

14. Do you compare yourself to other writers? In a positive or negative way?

i think i used to, in the way that every kid aspires to be like a particular role model. these days, not at all - there's no point in it. i know my strengths!

15. How do you think your writing as improved over time?

i stopped using ellipses so much, for one. LOL.

in general, reading lots of books and being exposed to lots of different writing mediums has given me a lot of perspective. that's more valuable than anything else, imo. having more experiences to fall back on, more knowledge of the world around me, and a better understanding of people means that my written works have more depth and scope. i think in terms of technical skill i've plateaued to a point that i'm happy with, but when it comes to the actual content and its presentation (i guess rhetoric is the term here), there is ALWAYS more to learn. i've definitely gotten better at rhetoric over the years.

16. Do you re-read old fics? Is there a time in your writing you won’t go back to?

answered!

17. What’s the best engagement/interaction/feedback you’ve received from someone who’s read your work?

answered!

18. Do you only write when you’re inspired, or do you try and sit down at specific times and write no matter what?

these days i only really do write when i feel inspired to, but that's not because i don't think writing regularly is boring. i mentioned this in another post somewhere, but the majority of my high-volume writing output was during a time of deep depression - writing was an escape, and now that i don't need to escape anymore, it's hard to resume my previous schedule. moreoever, i don't want to, because that schedule was symptomatic of other issues for me. so just when i'm inspired! it helps that when i open a file and look at it, i often feel compelled to write a bit more as the ideals percolate in my brain.

19. If you could write an ideal fic, what would it include?

this changes day by day, but i looooooove a good banter. (what a shocker, i know.) i also love huge explosive emotions and the fallout from them. if a fic can answer the question of what it means to be human in some way, then it's ideal for me.

20. What’s the greatest gift you’ve gotten from your writing?

friends! i've met so many cool people through writing and i continue to keep meeting cool people as i continue to write. it's a gift that never stops giving 🥰

[kay-elle-cee]

I posted 1,404 times in 2022

That's 1,390 more posts than 2021!

353 posts created (25%)

1,051 posts reblogged (75%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@kay-elle-cee

@emeralddoeadeer

@unknowableroom

@periodedits

@vlolets

I tagged 1,191 of my posts in 2022

Only 15% of my posts had no tags

#queue gotta step into the daylight - 361 posts

#jily - 203 posts

#kelsey writes - 154 posts

#ask game - 65 posts

#ask me - 59 posts

#emeralddoeadeer - 58 posts

#fic recs - 52 posts

#restless waves rise and fall - 44 posts

#jilytober - 44 posts

#potc - 42 posts

Longest Tag: 138 characters

#and like all my friends and my partner don’t have that same history of fandom and it’s so hard to communicate my overzealousness sometimes

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

Magic Like This || Read on Ao3

“Do you want to go?” He presses. “It’s not that simple.” If only it was. Of course she didn’t want to go. The boy in front of her shrugs. “It sounds simple enough to me: it’s going to be miserable for you. Don’t go.” Lily blinks at him—he speaks as if it’s the easiest thing in the world to just live by your own rules, put yourself first. He’s standing there, staring at her as the concept winds its way through her mind. What Lily really wants, if she’s being honest with herself, is to spend the day with James Potter.

My fic for the @jilytoberfest Bittersweet Challenge. Prompt: "Don't Go" but make it fluff.

71 notes - Posted October 15, 2022

#4

restless waves rise and fall || read chapter one on ao3

In efficiency and general seafaring know-how, First Mate Evans makes up for what Captain Potter lacks.

So she has to make up for a lot.

Or: In which James Potter is a gentleman pirate and Lily Evans is his loyal but vastly more competent First Mate.

Written for @thegobletofweasleys​ Jily Week 2022 pirate au prompt. It has since gotten out of hand and is currently shaping up to be 3 parts (you can blame @sunshinemarauder​ for the encouragement).

78 notes - Posted July 19, 2022

#3

no, i could never give you peace | Read on Ao3 | Playlist

But the rain is always gonna come if you’re standing with me Would it be enough if I could never give you peace?

James blinks. “Are you breaking up with me, Evans?” he jokes softly, resting his hand on hers. It’s a joke, but her body tenses and it immediately puts him on edge. The silence that follows is excruciating.

“I’m not doing anything.” Her nails begin to tap on the mug again—a nervous habit that James spots immediately. “I just think we should have a conversation.”

93 notes - Posted June 8, 2022

#2

I got this idea like 5 minutes ago and have been living in Saturday Night's Alright-land for so long, I'm letting myself choose joy.

7th-Year September 1st drabble below the cut.

James hastily waved off his parents with all the sincerity he could muster before he and Sirius started weaving their way through the start-of-term crowd on Platform 9 3/4 for the last time. To Fleamont and Euphemia, this was a momentous turning point, deserving some sort of emotional farewell or well-wishing, but to James it was simply an item on a checklist.

Arrive at platform: Check.

Still, he would've been more sympathetic to his parents' attentions had someone not delayed their arrival by oversleeping.

"Oi, slow down, Prongs. Christ!"

Sirius trailed behind him, navigating the crowds with more care than the other boy, who was charging through the crowd with a fervor that Sirius was all too familiar with by now.

James' eyes flitted rapidly from face to face as he made his way across the platform, searching for those brilliant eyes and the shock of red hair that he hadn't seen in much too long.

This summer had been one for the books, as far as James Potter was concerned, anyway. The freedom of being of-age with none of the responsibilities of school had meant a virtually unlimited choice of ways to entertain themselves this summer. Most evenings saw the soon-to-be 7th year Gryffindors—along with some other classmates—convalescing somewhere or other in Diagon Alley, finding little-known hidden gems of pubs or clubs, cooling themselves off with ice cream at Florean Fortescue's, or just causing general summertime mischief.

It was wonderful to feel so bonded with the others in their house going into their final year, and it had the added bonus of finally sparking that something between he and Lily Evans.

It was nothing serious—not yet. Just little stolen moments throughout the summer: a lingering glance across the table, inconspicuous hand-holding when they found themselves in the back of the group, the occasional goodnight kiss when one of them needed to side-along Apparate the other home. Little stolen moments that had been driving James mad these last few weeks Lily was visiting family and unable to join the end-of-summer hurrahs.

They had been writing each other, however, in her absence. She'd written him excitedly about her appointment as Head Girl, which was completely unsurprising to him as there was no better candidate (and he told her so). He had written back, nervously, and relayed how—incredibly—he'd been named Head Boy, only to be unexpectedly showered with congratulations and 'of course, it's unorthodox, but it makes sense'. They'd exchanged letters about the things they'd miss once Hogwarts was over, their lists of must-do's this year to fully glean the most out of their final year. They'd exchanged 'I miss you's and 'I wish you were here's and 'I can't wait to see you's.

Nearing the other side of the crowded platform, his eyes spotted that specific shade of red that had made this summer so superior to the others. His eyes zeroed in on Lily Evans, hair pulled back, Head Girl badge proudly displayed on her robes as she helped direct what he could only guess was a First Year into the train. His feet halted any forward-movement as his breath left his lungs.

'I can't wait to see you. I miss you.'

Locate Lily Evans: Check.

James moved forward with renewed vigor, her eyes finding his as the First Year loaded onto the train. A smile broke out on her face as he drew near, and gods how he wished he was able to get here earlier just so he could take in her expression that much sooner.

"Hey, you," she called lightly as he neared, looking up at him. "Big day for us, eh?"

Now face-to-face with her for the first time in weeks, after thinking only of her for the entirety of the time since she last left his sight, words escape him. Instead, he smiled down at her, at the anticipation in her eyes and felt sure in a way he hadn't felt with her in a long time, and bent down to capture her lips with his own, hand cupping her cheek.

She leaned into his touch instantly, responding to his kiss with an enthusiasm that caused James' pulse to pound in his ears, drowning out the sounds of the platform around them.

Kiss Lily Evans: Check.

James felt Lily's lips pull into another grin, and he took this as his cue to step back, breaking the kiss and grinning down at her, knowing that the excited glint in her eyes matched his own.

"Well, I meant leading the Prefects' meeting, but glad to know where your head's at," she quipped, unable to wipe the smile from her face.

James shrugged, hand flying to his hair with residual nerves. "Sorry, I was just...excited to see you."

Lily stepped forward, reaching up and pulling his hand down from his hair and lacing her fingers in his. Her eyes lingered on the sight of their entwined fingers as a blush painted her cheeks. "I'm excited to see you, too." Her eyes flickered back up to meet his, eyebrow quirking as she tugged him forward towards the train. "Well come on then. We have a meeting to run."

James followed her, gladly, as they loaded onto the train, feeling a little lighter in his step.

Be with Lily Evans: Check.

96 notes - Posted September 1, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

But the rain is always gonna come if you're standing with me Would it be enough if I could never give you peace?

James blinks. “Are you breaking up with me, Evans?” he jokes softly, resting his hand on hers. It’s a joke, but her body tenses and it immediately puts him on edge. The silence that follows is excruciating.

“I’m not doing anything.” Her nails begin to tap on the mug again—a nervous habit that James spots immediately. “I just think we should have a conversation.”

Playlist

Read on Ao3

97 notes - Posted June 6, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[haloburns]

⭐

Here's a star for the director's commentary thingy :3 Excited to see what you pick to talk about

aww thank you!!

IM GONNA TALK ABOUT GHOST LIGHT

(for those of u new here, ghost light is my danny phantom oc ship, consisting of danny and mateo. mateo is my pfp)

so i started this angsty au series of my own series, right?? it started with a half-assed christmas fic that i speed wrote christmas eve and then abandoned. then like.... a little over a year later, i get this idea for an au and realize it's THEE perfect prequel to this christmas fic. so i start dabbling with it in between other projects and i fully intend to finish it before i post it because it's not THAT big a deal, and very few people actually follow me for my oc content ANYWAY but in march of this year i was like "okay. that's it. i need validation!!!" so i posted the first two chapters

then i decided i was burnt out from writing danny phantom stuff due to lack of engagement and jumped over to legend of zelda (pack server my beloved) and have spent the last few months recovering over there. except every time i plan on working on my next update for one of my fics over there, i end up with this fic again. EVERY. TIME.

"this isn't what i really want" is based on the idea that things would've played out differently if danny and mateo hadn't been roommates to begin with. the idea that "what if danny and mateo weren't roommates? what if danny was already ghost king? what if mateo never found out that danny was phantom?" drove the idea, but unfortunately, those two are like barbies i smush together magnets that can't be drawn away, and i realized that them having a "we're just friends :)" kind of relationship while fuckin nasty and pretending no one can tell was EXACTLY the vibe i wanted. this is one of those frustrating fics because everything would be solved IF THEY JUST TALKED TO EACH OTHER but their own fears keep them from being honest

which is why i like the title so much bc the context changes as the fic goes on and i am a slut for that shit

MORE DETAILS UNDER THE READ MORE BC THIS GOT LONG LMAO

it was only supposed to be a few chapters long, MAYBE 20k, and now i'm looking at 8 chapters, roughly 45k. AND I HAVE ACTUALLY PLANNED THE ENDING AND HAVE IT ALMOST COMPLETELY FINISHED!!!

but my favorite part about writing this fic has just been like... playing around with narrative stuff. the first chapter happens over the course of like. ten minutes. and it's so super gay and yearning and poetic. then the second chapter like. zooms through the night until danny and mateo are in an alcove all but fucking. then we jump to chapter three and get a deeper insight into these variations' minds and i reveal the level of dumbassery to be expected from this fic lmao i've also had a lot of fun pulling pieces from other fics i've written/published to tie together and change their context! they're fun little nods to my other works and has been such a fun exercise in "okay. so they do x because of y... but what if i change y to z, what would they do then???"

and then chapter four!! i actually have a completely different version that i originally intended to use, but as i got to the end of chapter 3, i realized, they would not fucking do that. so i recontextualized what i'd written and it turned into a whole different beast, once again showcasing the boys' whole fucking dumbassery on display for literally EVERYONE EXCEPT THEMSELVES TO SEE i just really loved them playing in the morning while continuing to delude themselves that This Meant Nothing to either of them

chapter five was actually not supposed to be entirely from luke's pov but it turned out to work best for pushing the story through more time quickly, and to also see the boys from an (mostly) outside perspective to showcase just how STUPID they're being. the conversations mirrored each other almost exactly but in ways unique to each of them that was so much fun to play with. luke and danny's relationship is much more antagonistic sibling-coded than luke and mateo's. luke is definitely filling the older sibling role for both of them, but in danny's case, he already has a meddling older sister, so his and luke's relationship follows that same pattern. luke is fine with that, he has that relationship with some of his sisters in both directions (he's the middle and only boy). but with mateo, he's the oldest, so he revels in the soft guiding older sibling advice luke gives him, and it's SO OBVIOUS in this chapter. danny and luke shouting and throwing things at each other whereas luke and mateo having a softer conversation, although both of them culminate in the same advice: just talk to him. then ofc we finish with jamie and luke talkin about his tendency to meddle and we get to see a silent peek at danny and mateo's relationship when others aren't watching which is just... so precious to me

now my plans for the last three chapters...... rubs hands together with an evil grin

so i never intended this fic to be as in depth as the main series, so chapter six jumps to the end of the year. end of the year celebration that ends in a "last night on earth" kind of deal with danny and mateo, and it's fuckin RAUNCHY but i'm really proud of it. dunno how it ends yet (maybe that's what my writer's block is... maybe if i figure out where i'm going, then i'll be able to finish it) it's... mostly just lots of gay pining while being rawed lmao

but then i realized nothing interesting happens in sophomore and junior years that would be worth mentioning, bc there's not ghost shenanigans that anyone else is involved with, so i decided to just.... skip forward lmao and i did it in THEE funniest style imaginable: a glee recap. it's literally titled "here's what you missed last time on..." and then there's an actual glee style recap where vanessa runs through the big events and we get some glee-recap quotes and end on an open ending.

then i proceed to cram the events of one year into a single chapter. the plan is danny and mateo get caught goin at it during a party, but they don't remember being visible. so mateo's confused when everyone is congratulating him on finally getting together with danny and he panics. and ends the relationship. this is like...late october?? so he and danny avoid each other until break. then break happens, they come back and mateo meets tony.

so, those of you who've read the main series will know the name Tony. he is a bitch. he hurts danny (emotionally) but he's not really a bad guy. he's just kind of a dick. he serves as an emotional flashpoint for ghost light in the original fic, and he does here as well, but this time it's slightly more passive?? and gentle?? i actually LIKE him this time lmao

the fic ends in an unsatisfying way, and that's on purpose. danny and mateo make amends for one final night, the night before graduation, but after that... they don't say anything and continue on like they have been. so they move away and drift apart and don't see each other again... until the christmas fic, which is hallmark levels of ridiculousness lmao

AND I'M SO CLOSE TO FINISHING THIS FIC!! i'm done with chapter 7, and chapters 6 & 8 are in their final acts. i'm gonna post them all at once and then turn my attention to finishing the hallmark fic!! i just... really love this story. i love getting to play with the characters and motivations and their ties to each other, how different things might've been if things had happened just a little differently, even if it is with my own work. there are like. seven people who give a shit about mateo and the stories i'm telling with him, and they keep me going with these fics!! writing in a fandom that actually gives praise and feedback makes it easier to work on my mateo stories, and whether the pack knows it or not, they're the reason i'm able to even CONSIDER finishing this story and i'm so grateful for that

BUT I'LL BE DONE NOW BC THIS IS ALREADY SO FUCKING LONG LMAO

thank you for giving me the opportunity to scream about this fic bc so far, only my sister has heard me yell about it and i figure she's due for a break LMAO

[emilykaldwen]

11, 12 and 26 for the bts fic asks (the maiden and the drowning boy)?

Behind the Scenes Fic Asks

Thank you so much for sending this!!! Okay *cracks knuckles* let's see what thinky thoughts I need to make coherent.

11. Was there a scene that you hadn't originally planned to include? Why did you decide to fit it in?

Ooooh nice! So this is the first fic I've like truly outlined because there's so many plots and subplots and moving parts that I need to be aware of. Like putting a bunch of feral toddlers on leashes! The thing I make sure I do though, is to leave breathing room for scenes exactly like this where they come up because you find the story needs it in that moment. I think I have to go with... (me checking what I've written so far) So there's a scene in chapter 14 (the ball!) that I ended up writing between Abby and her grandfather, Rodrick Reyne that I'm incredibly pleased about because the man isn't dumb. He's totally acknowledging that Alicent is picking Abby to be queen, but he will absolutely fight against the betrothal if it isn't what Abby wants. And it just made my heart incredibly full because there is one fucking adult in her life that isn't trying to use Abby to their own ends/mold in their own image/try control Aegon through her. He cares about her and there is absolutely an AU somewhere where Abby goes to foster at Castamere after Lyonel's death.

12. Was there a scene you wished you could have included? Why didn't it fit in?

So I had wanted to do a scene with Aegon and Viserys where Aegon is asking permission to go into the royal treasury to get some jewels for Abby to make a necklace. This was meant to be right after the gallery scene in Chapter Nine. I scrapped it for a few reasons, I think mainly due to length? And Tonally in this chapter I wanted to keep it between Abby and Aegon in terms of them feeling like their relationship is changing before knocking them apart for the next chapters. If I can find a place to include it in the back half of the chapters, I absolutely will though because I really do need a scene with Aegon and Viserys. (Initially I thought of posting it as it's own outtake/one shot side story but it really is something I need to include)

26. Wild Card! A fun fact about this fic!

Well fuck LOL man, what's a fun fact... So I had come up with the concept of this story... fuck. It was the week that The Princess and the Queen aired, or the following week (I had created Abby back in August pretty quickly, although she was her canonical age at that point) and started writing mid-october or the week before nano started. It all began with what I intended ot be a one shot, with 15k words of young!Alicent and I wrote about... 32k of backstory route. There was going to be... 10? chapters of Alicent/Abby/Aegon rotating POV through Driftmark, and then time jump 3 years later to what is our opening chapter in Maiden. However I was really struggling with young!Abby POVs because she was such a happy kid? and she doesn't have the language or understanding or self realization to understand the 'Oh I need to be happy all the time because my dad was sad mom was dying and everyone around me is mentally unwell so I need to be happy because it makes other people happy'. And then I ended up scrapping that essentially and starting over and then at that point I got a very quick surgery approval and immediately started in on my fasting diet which took away any ability to string words together. Some of it is actually getting recycled for some stuff: there's a scene in particular where Daemon showed up for Aegon's 13th nameday, and Daemon was the one who introduced Aegon to Mysaria (because I had been trying to figure out how this little menace ended up becoming a regular fixture in flea bottom). Anyway, there was a really good dragon face off scene that will be repurposed for a later chapter in arc one!