#been thinking of this lately
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Getting fucked in a meat freezer with all the meat slabs hanging around and freaking you out because you might be next <3
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Sleeper agent
Promises,
Promises I make myself,
Like a set of rules to follow.
I remember it so clearly,
One of these promises,
Back when we were new,
Back when so many of us were new to eachother,
But that's a different thought.
I remember hearing it through the worries,
A subtle dig not aimed at me,
Or at least I don't think it was,
Maybe it wasn't even a dig,
I wouldn't be like them.
A sleeper agent i didn't know I had.
It helped back then,
The emotions ignored,
From crying to in charge,
For I wouldn't be like them.
Now the rules are overwhelming,
I wouldn't be like them,
Or her,
Or him,
Those who came before me whole mistakes I must learn from.
Too many mistakes,
Too many things out of my control,
I'm not like them,
But I am,
So I hide it in myself,
I scream from the inside,
There's nothing I can do anyway but wait.
Deep down I know I wouldn't be a bad person,
Its a different role I play than they did,
But the urge to hide it all remains,
I can keep it and cope with it,
It just costs a little to myself,
A little sanity or a little time or a little cry or all three.
I think somewhere in the rules,
In the comparisons,
In the fears and assumptions and worries and doubts,
Somewhere in all that,
I forgot that I am a human too
#venting#been thinking of this lately#maybe i do have some real bad people pleasing tendancies#i say as if i didnt already know that
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what if zura met Ikumatsu and her husband when he was still alive and they both decided to love him and make space for him in their relationship 👀
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"never too late to be who you might have been" by sara yukiko mon | still from i saw the tv glow, "there is still time"
#art#sara yukiko mon#i saw the tv glow#never too late to be who you might have been#there is still time#i've been thinking about that movie a bit i guess
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couldnt draw my thang for mid-autumn so treated myself to a calne redesign instead
#calne ca#hatsune miku#VOCALOID#cw: body horror#<- And I Fucking Mean That We Are Not Fucking Around Today#well we are. as in I drew this as a fuckaround treat for myself#but the body horror tag is the most warranted its ever been on this blog#ask to tag#I am as ever on my journey to make calne ca Worse. her OG version is too cool. even the crab ver is too cool#I need her to be worse to look at. I am also getting myself into to mood to test my hand at boarding a pmv for my friend's cover#I think my thought for this was ''I should try and give her a more insectoid bodyplan''#which in this mostly means gently three-part body and six limbs (my favourite amount of limbs to draw rn)#actually almost gave her eight but didnt like how that silhouette came out so I mermaided her uh. abdomen I guess#though maybe next time I do this I should push that idea more. the head and torso are still very distinct for one unified part#I feel like one of my old attempts was onto something with like. a more horizontal body plan... well! live and learn etc#happy late mid autumn I guess. I should play with touys about it... I miss model kits. mayhaps...
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Teen hood
Another bundle of ocs drawings without context, but now medieval edition :)
#been thinking about them a lot lately#I have a bunch of drawings of them that I have never posted#might post them later who knows#art#digital art#digital drawing#my art#myart#artists on tumblr#original character#illustration#oc#original art#medieval#middle ages#knights#12th century#dark fantasy#dark#gothic
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"NO DWARVES IN MY FOREST 😡"
"Your wife is hot."
"...THIS ONE DWARF WITH IMPECCABLE TASTE CAN STAY"
#lotr#celeborn#gimli#jrrt lord of wife-guys#tolkien#been thinking about doriath and lothlorien a lot lately and that HoME note about how Celeborn overlooked Thingol's faults re what happened#and how much Lothlorien is Doriath remade and how much it's Doriath-done-differently#but that one's for a longer post I think!
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Atsushi learned to bake after chapter 88...
#my art#digital art#bungou stray dogs#bsd#bungou stray dogs fanart#shin soukoku#sskk#nakajima atsushi#akutagawa ryunnosuke#cooking my bf meme!#kinda late to this tread but idc#bsd atsushi#bsd akutagawa#bsd spoilers#was thinking about drawing the cookie burned#i should have done that it would have been funny (no)
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archivist be upon ye
#relistening to tma again#i think the last time i’ve drawn anything related to it was like may 2020#god it’s been a while#have been listening to the magnus protocol and my god it’s so good#but heres good old jonathan as a treat#the interest has been in deep slumber for the past 4/5 years only periodically coming back to life#i’m very normal about this podcast actually#on other note i also started a taz balance relisten#what’s up with me and revisiting my middle school fixations lately#anyways#if you’re still reading these tags i’m impressed i could never with my abysmal attention span#tma#the magnus archives#the magnus pod#jonathan sims#the archivist#tma jon#fanart#my art#digital art#illustration#doodle
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she’s in way too deep i fear
#happy protocol day#been thinking about how totally and utterly fucked she is lately#someone get my girl out of there#gwendolyn bouchard#the magnus protocol#tmagp#tmagp fanart#tmagp spoilers#eye contact#jaspers art
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I think the best advice I ever got to stop myself from getting in my head over issues i was having with a partner/friend was “Are you deciding on ultimatums in your relationship without the other persons knowledge or consent? Are you having conversations in your head where the other party is a projection you supply the responses for? If so; you have done this person a huge disservice in not allowing them to answer on their own terms. You have done so much architecture around this problem in your mind that is impenetrable for anyone who was not there when it was being built.”
That shit really changed my life and honestly? I think made me a nicer person to be around.
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so like is it specifically planets the solver craves or can it get by with just eating dirt off the ground
#thank you those people in that one server i havent been there long enough to remember names#for bringing up the idea#is very funny#god i have genuinely no idea what to do for n's dialogue boxes. cannot think of a gimmick whatsoever#suprise attack by the artstyle change. i am imploding right now#cannot settle on any style whatsoever. genuinely changing by the hour#so strangely proud of ns hand in this one i dont know what it is about it but i really like it#hats still pisses me off though. why so difficult to draw#murder drones#art#murder drones uzi#murder drones n#serial designation n#murder drones cyn#or its#murder drones absolutesolver#who knows at this point#murder drones skig#still fighting tooth and nail for the tail to be named skig. it fits so well#iz go attack glitch headquarters for me#i think its late enough i can keep this unspoilered
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9 / 266
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#yuji itadori#itadori yuuji#jjk spoilers#jjk manga spoilers#jjk 266#fanart#jjk fanart#itafushi#jujutsu kaisen fanart#used th itfs tag bc its implied and this is an itfs piece i said so#i dont think ive seen this parallel made yet??? but its ok if it has#i just had the idea hit at gross o clock last night when i ws alr exhausted n had 2 force myself to sleep instead of drawing it#i just . clutches chest . YUUJI#th char development the emotional maturity..#the willingness to put aside his gojo voice personal feelings in favour of giving megumi agency over his own life#rather than burden him with expectations the way every1 has done fr both of them over the course of the series...#tears in my eyes thats my mc!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#anyway art notes i think lower one is some of the best yuuji hair ive drawn 2 date#it's kind of similar to one of my 265 redraws but i think i struck a better balance in how thoroughly i rendered it here#proud of my me but also SO grateful tht yuuji has not been fighting me lately#so much yuuji content these past chapters i cant imagine th frustration having to Also fight him in order 2 create content fr them#anyway itafushi kaisen is real and canon and alive and yuuji singlehandedly discovered th cure 2 my mental illness w this line
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trigunned the hades or hadesed the trigun (id in alt)
#trigun#trigun maximum#nicholas d wolfwood#vash the stampede#meryl stryfe#milly thompson#millions knives#ruporas art#type of shit ive been on lately bc ive been playing an obsessive amount of hades 2 lmfao… ofc imstead of drawing fansrt for hades#i channel that energy into trigun?😭 SEE.. the thing is. i am ALWAYS thinking about a trigun game… like an action story game#it is rotating in my brain 24/7 and now after 7billion years i finally pick up a video game#and the inspiration sparked. obviously this is just a mere mimic of an existing media... but im thinking about the plot of max now#executed differently between mediums… webbing a new retelling of the original story as game mechanics allows you - thinking of the#new roles the characters would take. like wolfwood here is not Constantly by vash’s side but he will show up once a run to clear out an#encounter. shows up seldomly at home base to make gifting difficult... an existing companion and still journeys on his own. for more#relations options merylmilly will also have occasions where they separate so vash can speak to them individually - the gungho are not bosse#most of them get the roles of giving “boons” i think.. BUT ANYWAY thats me reimagining trigun into hades. now imagining trigun into an#ORIGINAL video game.... ough... ohhh....guhh... I WANT IT SO BAD!!!!!!!!#this was just a fun exercise... im thinking about doing more but i think i shouldactually draw some hades 2 fanart first
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