#because why would I ever turn that off
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Iâm glad Tumblr is refocusing (I hope Tumblr Live dies a swift death), but Iâm also committing to providing funding to my favorite hellsite because I can afford to. I guess over a decade of free use is enough time to admit Iâm in it for the long haul. Iâll be here until they shut the servers down and drag me out kicking and screaming
#I went ad free for the year#I left blaze on though#because why would I ever turn that off#tumblr should allow malicious blazing#hellsite sweet hellsite#vex talking#tumblr
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Pictured: Loop being extremely normal as they lay in their shallow (homemade) grave as they meditate on existence and also if they have annoyed the Researcher enough THIS time for her to murder them and bury them alive.
(Spoilers - they did not annoy her even CLOSE to that much.)
And there is the required reverse image of Odile arriving - she's had a LONG day (i.e. previous loop), and due to this it will take ten minutes before she even acknowledges the shallow grave Loop is laying in, as she was distracted complaining about what Siffrin just did to annoy her.
----
I'd say there's context for all of that, because like...there IS context? Here's the link to the series of fics that HAS that context even! But also...even with context...can't say that it's going to make any of this less weird.
Mostly Odile is looping because due to Loop's wish the universe got rewritten to make Siffrin's repression and emotional issues (the ones bad enough to get him stuck in a time loop in the game) 'someone else's' problem...or at least that's Loop's best theory atm!
Regardless, context or not, I'm quite happy with how the pics came out, and figured I might as well post them here too.
#isat#isat loop#isat odile#in stars and time#like a wheel ever turning au#odile looping au#my art#This was vaguely gesturing at the 'Siffrin gets woken up by Mirabelle' at the start of the game#but like#RADICALLY recontextualized to be near unrecognizable#also vaguely gesturing at the 'hanged man' tarot card because Loop's too fabulous to not pose dramatically in the grave they dug themselves#just to make a point#a point which odile then processed to ignore#Gotta say from the point that i got the vision of loop digging their own grave#the chapter basicly wrote itself#i love how much black humour In Stars in Time fanfics can have without it killing the tone by making it humourless!#It IS possible to write idiots in time loops dying horribly and still have it be a black comedy in pokemon#but LORD that was so much harder to keep the tone balanced with#....look.#i KNOW i have a thing for time loops#i imprinted on Steins;Gate when it first came out and was never the same again#that anime has it's many issues but also it rewrote part of my brain#...also...verbal ticks.#still say 'dootdeedoo~!' unironically#to be fair! I also would say 'nya' as a verbal tick - had to ACTIVELY unlearn doing it even so i'd stop doing it at lecturers in uni#why yes! i was REALLY easy to mock as a teen lol#anyway these tags got off topic#let's wrap this shit up
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Bruce: now, for the last part of this meeting
Dick, Jason, Tim, Stephanie, Damian, Cass, and Duke: ?
Bruce: -turns around to bring up a power point presentation, the title card of which just reads 'Please Be Normal About Tim'-
Bruce: -turns back around-
Bruce: ...Tim why are you the only one still here
Tim: I just like power point presentations
#Jason keeps beating up Tim and then chasing him around trying to get him to join him#including AFTER Tim kicked him directly in the balls#he had a whole murder board about Tim when he was stalking him#Damian also keeps trying to beat up/kill Tim and prove he is the 'superior Robin'#Dick is generally pretty chill but he and Tim have a history of getting into shenanigans together#also Dick has a tendency to go a bit feral when Tim is involved and hurt#Stephanie once said Tim had a 'bad case of the Stephs' and while I love that for her absolutely not#Cass neither wants to kill Tim nor be romantically entangled with him#which is good!#but like Dick she also goes along with his plans without as many follow up questions as she should probably have#and by 'as many' I mean 'any'#she pretended to stab him through the chest to throw off a bunch of assassins#and I'm pretty sure she didn't question a single second of it#Tim just turned to her like 'I have a fake sword and I need you to pretend to kill me with it'#Cass just gave a thumbs up with no follow-up questions#Duke#my beloved#I know he and Tim don't interact much in canon#but in my heart I feel he would not be normal about Tim either#like regular ass Tim Drake figuring out Batman's secret identity and deciding to just become Robin because Gotham and Batman need it?#attaching rockets to a skateboard to get around?#coming up with insane and convoluted plans and consistencies that don't make sense to anyone else?#plans and contingencies that WORK?#Duke would see Tim as aspirational and go along with whatever insane bullshit nonsense he comes up with just to see what happens#he would 100% be down for whatever Tim has planned and would absolutely feed into it#he just wants to crank that little chaos gremlin up to eleven and watch him go#Bruce is desperate to keep them from interacting in any capacity for longer than thirty seconds at a time because HE KNOWS#HE KNOWS what will happen if they ever team up#it's why he put them on separate shifts#for the record Bruce ALSO had to sit through this presentation
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We all know that the reason why Bruce Wayne isn't religiously Jewish is because dc are cowards, but also because many of the community itself is cowards. I personally believe it comes from a lack of knowledge about what it even means to be religious because most of the community is Christian or culturally Christian. So as someone that would probably be considered not religious by Christians, but Religious by most other Jewish people, I think that Bruce Wayne fits in this section of being Jewish.
Bruce can't go to the Synagogue often because of the whole being Batman stuff, but he still goes on the high holidays when he can. He celebrates with the Kane family as well! And Kate would obviously understand if he couldn't come because she's Batwoman! Give me a Bruce Wayne says Yiddish curses. Give me a Batman that has a bunch of Chanukkiot that are just so pretty because they are rich and definitely have a ton. Give me Batfamily shabbat dinners when they are able to. Rest days on Saturday for the Jewish members when they are more members in the Batfam to make it work (and it being a mitzvah when he does have to be Batman on Shabbat because its a mitzvah to save a life). Give me Mezuzot on every entryway. Give me a Bruce Wayne who inherited his mother's seder plates and actually uses them. Give me a Bruce Wayne that says stuff like kein ayin hara before giving good news! Give me a confused Dick Grayson when Bruce insults him (its actually a compliment, but to ward against the evil eye you will say the opposite of what you mean) and then Bruce having to explain after he realizes that Dick has no idea why he just insulted him. Give me a Batman that follows Jewish values (more than he canonically does)
Just because someone ins't actively involved within a wider community of that Religion doesn't mean they aren't Religious! Or at least don't give me a culturally Jewish Bruce Wayne that doesn't do any of this. Thats just you stripping away all the Jewish parts of him.
Bruce Wayne is Jewish and you can't just ignore that
#The kane family is there from when he is a kid to when hes an adult#meaning they definitely had a hand in raising him#I think its very odd that alfred the bodyguard turned butler of the waynes to have been the one to canonically raise him#while his entire maternal side of the family is still alive and kicking#like guys please come on#and also I think it would be very weird that alfred didn't bring Bruce to his maternal family#that would just be out of character imo#but yeah I think its very small minded to think of being religious as a belief in god and going to church#because that is a very very small portion about what it means to be religious to me#also! I based off the Kane's name origin it would be very likely for the Kanes to be Irish Jews#oh and one more thing#Just because I consider him to be just Jewish doesn't mean that its impossible for him to be dual faith#We have no idea what religion Thomas was#we could say christian#but I like to say thats from Alfred and any christian stuff that the Batfam celebrate is not because of Bruce#but is actually from Alfred and any of the kids that are Christian/culturally Christian#nevermind have another thought on top of this mess#why would Richard Grayson ever be considered christian#press x to doubt#while I know nothing about Romani religious practices and I know that is on purpose from their community which I respect#the community does know that Dick is Romani#meaning he would follow their religious practices#which I think he would follow extra hard after the death of his parents#and there is also the argument that he could be jewish if he was raised in a household that is Jewish and holds Jewish values#but yeah the Wayne manor has only one confirmed christian in it and its Alfred#batman#batfam#bruce wayne#kane family#kate kane
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I had a thought, dear However scary About that night The bugs and the dirt Why were you digging? What did you bury Before those hands pulled me From the earth? I will not ask you where you came from I will not ask you, neither should you
-------- an extension of this excerpt because I've been thinking of Femme Danny and Jason all week. It's mildly suggestive, but that's really the only heads up needed. --------
Music blaring, bass heavy in her ears, Danny finds him in a ditch at the bottom of the bluff. She was leaving the observatory, and she nearly misses him as she turns out onto the last stretch of road leading back into the city.
She catches sight of him, just barely. A glimpse in the corner of her eye; something reflecting on the light. She thinks it's a deer at first, and instinctual terror that only the idiocy of a deer denting her car can give her, strikes her hard. There's no one behind her, so she slams the breaks.
Her car stops; there's no deer. She looks and looks, but there's no deer, no deer buddy â they always come in pairs. But something still catches her eye; light reflecting off leather, in the ditch below just a few feet in front of her.
"What the fuck is that?" Slips out of her mouth before she can really think it through, and she's pulling off to the shoulder, wheels crunching gravel, before she thinks that through either.
Danny's climbing out of her car within seconds, putting it in park and hitting her hazards as her door clicks open and she stands up on the ledge. The trees block the sky, and there is no moon beholden to brighten the land, only the dull light of the stars and the brights of her car.
There's a man in a ditch. And he's not moving. From the distance, Danny's not sure if he's breathing.
She breathes out for him; "Fuck." She's running around the front of her car, not thinking it through. Her feet crunch the gravel, bugs buzzing at her ears, and she's sliding down the small hill into the ditch to reach his side.
"Please don't be dead, please don't be dead." Repeats in mantra under her breath, she can smell blood; heavy and iron, mixing with the dirt and the grass. Her hands find his side, Danny rolls him over onto his back. Her fingers find his pulse, and she breathes relief. He's alive.
â---------
Danny finds no less than two â no, three guns, four knives, and an actual, goddamn shiv on the half-dead ditch man. But not a single ID or wallet.
The man reeks of danger, even in his unconscious state it lingers on him like a rich cologne. It's the human instinct to be curious, and maybe it's the blood and dirt that tells her he's bad news. Common sense, naturally.
She doesn't know what to do with him. Danny wants to help him, but the ghostly part of her, the one that seeks safety above all else â for herself, for her loved ones. Because growing up in a house of weapons on the tables for sticky, pudgy fingers to play with, and food that needs killing twice, and labs full of half-broken beakers and radioactive substances spilling onto the floor robbed her of it entirely, â tells her to leave him.
He's dangerous. Her core hums cold, freezing the tips of her fingers, making her ears ring. She forgets to breathe, her hands going numb. Leave him for the coyotes to find; for the bugs to feast on; for the mud to swallow whole. Leave him for the land. Nobody carries this many weapons on them unlessâ
He groans. In only the light from her high beams, his cracked lips split and makes a noise of pain. His chest rises, shuddery and slow, and he doesn't wake. The man slips back down into unconsciousness. But he's alive.
He's alive.
Danny exhales. It's springtime, wreathed in life. It's cold; he's cold. But alive. She shakes the chill from her fingers, resolution warms her lungs.
Carrying him up to her car isn't easy â dressed like fucking Dean Winchester and wearing half as many layers, the man is probably two hundred pounds. But she's been working out and taking boxing classes since sophomore year of high school. She throws him over her shoulder in a fireman's carry, and hikes them both up the hill.
She drives them home. Don't ask her why she didn't take them to the hospital; she can't give an answer. Not one that makes sense. She knows enough first aid to fix almost anything he might have.
Danny blasts the heat and turns the music on low; switches to something softer, more comforting, in case he wakes up. She kicks the passenger seat back far enough so that if he does, he's reclined comfortably.
He doesn't wake up, she can't keep her eyes off him anyways.
â---------
Danny lays him on the couch in her house. He gets blood and mud on the fabric, and she'll need to get a new one because of it. But she takes off his boots, strips him of his shirt and jackets, and flies to the bathroom to get her first aid kit.
He doesn't wake up the entire time she's putting stitches in his side. Nothing is broken, but he's bruised and cut. Some get band-aids, others get bandages.
The man has half as many scars as Danny does. Stabs, cuts, a few burns here and there. Danny has those too, but she doubts the man has been impaled before like she has. The luck of ghosts that they can't die by mortal means. Or curse, depending on how you look at it.
(There's a thin scar on his throat, like someone tried to slice it open. She sees it while she's stitching up a laceration near his collarbone, and Danny can't stop herself from huffing.)
("We match." She murmurs, joking dry and ingenuine. She doubts anyone's survived a botched decapitation like she has. At least his scar is thin and hard to see. That wasn't a good night for her; she had to sew it closed herself, alone out of refusal to let her friends help.)
When she's done, she collapses into the recliner beside him, and falls asleep. She slips in and out of dreams all night.
â---------
When she wakes up, the man is staring at her, sitting up on the couch like an animal listening for the predator nearby. It's a good thing she hid his weapons in the floorboards when they arrived. She stares back at him, eyes half-lidded with sleep.
He's handsome. She thinks, and wakes up fully.
â---------
His name is Jason Todd, he doesn't remember who he is.
That's... a problem.
â---------
She makes them both food, and she'll never stop appreciating the fact that she no longer needs to fight her fridge before the food inside lets her eat. She hasn't lived with her parents in years, and yet the awe still hits her some days.
"I thought I told you to stay seated." She frowns when Jason Todd enters her kitchen, a hand hovering over his bandaged side. They're both tense; awkward and wrong-footed. Off-kilter. It's not a surprise to her. He's amnesiac, she's a stranger.
Jason Todd blinks at her, leaning against the doorframe. From her periphery, he shrugs, only to suck in his teeth in pained regret moments later. "I got bored." He tells her.
"Well, I don't have painkillers," Danny retorts, cheek comes easy to her. Too easy, sometimes. "if you tear your stitches then I'm giving you a rag to bite into while I redo them."
Well, if anything, it gets a snort from him.
â---------
"So, do I have a shirt, or did you just find a half-naked, half-dead man in the woods and decide to take him home?" Jason Todd asks her from the table a few minutes later. She can see, even standing a few feet away, the gooseflesh rising bumps against his skin.
Her cheeks color pink, and she moves to the hallway. "You have a shirt," she says, "you have two actually, and a jacket. I threw the shirts in the wash because they were filthy."
The jacket was leather, so during the night, when she woke up from her many bouts of restless sleep, she got up and cleaned it by hand. "I would've done the same with your jeans, but I can take a half-dead man home," she opens the dryer and pulls out the shirts, "but I draw the line at taking off his pants when he's unconscious."
It gets a short laugh out of him; harsh and brief, and it makes her relax, just a little. Laughter meant just enough comfort to not be tense... most of the time. She returns to his side and drapes the still-warm clothes onto the table.
"What if my legs were hurt?" He asks her, raising an eyebrow even as he reached for the first shirt.
"Then that is called an exception to the rule, ditch man."
â---------
He stays with her. He has nowhere to go â and trust her, they looked. Or they tried to. But he has no social media that shows up under the name âJason Toddâ. Oh, there are Jason Todds, but none that match the way he looks â none of them his age, none of them with black hair and blue eyes, no white streak in the curls at the front. Â
Well, there was one possible candidate. A Jason Todd-Wayne, infamous adoptive son of Bruce Wayne. But he died the same year Danny did, and unlike her, he didnât come back.Â
âGreat.â Jason Todd sighs heavy, âI match with a dead kid.â
âIâm honestly kind of impressed.â Danny tells him, frowning despite her laughing disbelief. She scrolls through every social media she can find, and he just doesnât show up. There are no warrants out for his arrests, no celebrity interviews with him in it, no missing news reports matching his description. Nothing. âHow do you not have any socials? Youâre like a ghost.â And she knows a thing or two about ghosts.
Itâs equally as suspicious as it is impressive. Who are you, Jason Todd? She wonders, looking over to him. Â
He merely shrugs, careful of his injuries, and slumps into his chair. âDonât ask me, I donât remember.âÂ
She gives him the guest room, and they go out and buy him clothes with what budget she can afford. She drags him to a thrift store first, to every thrift store in the city, and they come back with a decent enough haul that he has clothes for at least two weeks.Â
â---------
âDanny, what is that?âÂ
She takes a long sip of her drink, Jason lingering at her side like a shadow. âA smoothie, Tucker.â She says, deadpan like it's the most obvious thing in the world as she slides into their favorite booth with practiced ease. âYou know this, I always get one on Fridays.âÂ
Jason follows her easily, slow and careful, mindful of his sides. Heâs back to awkward, tense, acting like an outside looking in. Like heâs not quite sure what to do in the face of her friends. Theyâve been together for a week now, and she asked him if he wanted to meet Sam and Tucker with her.Â
(âYouâve been cooped up here all week.â She says when he asks her why, her hands shifting the purse at her shoulder. In shorts and a tank-top her scars lay on display for the world to see, and while she's long since shed the worst of her self-consciousness, it still creeps up on her. She can feel his eyes on them, even after a week. âSome fresh air and a change of scenery might do you some good. Maybe even jog that noggin of yours.â)Â
Sam and Tucker stare at her, expressions unreading on their faces. Their eyes flick to Jason at her side, and then back to her. Danny takes another longer sip of her drink, and when she lets go with an obnoxious smack, she jerks her head to Jason. âOh,â she says like an afterthought, an impish smile shadowing over her lips. âThis is Jason, I found him in a ditch on Sunday.âÂ
"You what!?"
â---------
She doesnât know how it happens. It sneaks up on her like sunlight creeping across the grass, melting away the morning dew and warming the dirt. She loves him. She loves him, she loves him, she loves him. Itâs a terrible, choking thing. Wonderfully beautiful, melting her from the inside out.Â
She loves him, she loves him, she loves him.
Itâs greater than anything sheâs felt before. Different from when she nearly dated Valerie in high school â but so, so similar to it at the same time. Warm in its certainty, in its similarity, burning in its difference.Â
Danny doesnât even realize it until half a year living with him, maybe just a little bit longer. But she realizes when she comes downstairs in the early dredges of the morning, sleep clinging to her lashes and sunlight unfurling through the windows, and finds him in the kitchen making food already.Â
Itâs not the first time sheâs woken up to him doing this. But itâs, for some reason, only now that it hits her how fucking domestic it is. With music playing soft through the speaker of his used phone, barefoot in nothing but sweatpants, and humming along under his breath. Heâs gotten so comfortable here; he laughs easier now, smiles easier. It was like watching a flower bloom in real time.Â
And the sunlight cards through his hair like fingers, caressing over his face in that loving way it does when it wants someone to see the breathless beauty of their eyes.Â
Something constricts in Dannyâs chest, tight, fond, wanting. Mine, her mind whispers, faint and distant, and knocking the air from her lungs like a fucking train. Her fingers curl tight around the stairway rails, she has half a mind to crack it in two.Â
Then he turns and sees her, he always notices her quickly, and Jason smiles at her.Â
Somehow, Danny manages to smile back smiling with the ease of breathing, even when her mouth runs dry.
(If she kisses him, will she taste sugar? She hopes not â white sugar is unfilling, sweet but with nothing else to it. If she tastes Jason Todd, she hopes she tastes caramel.)Â
â---------
âWant to go throw axes with me?â Danny asks, draping over the back of the couch and hanging her arms off Jasonâs shoulders. Her hand finds his hair, and her fingers tangle with the dark curls. She can smell his shampoo when she hooks her chin on the top of his head.
Jason stills, a book in hand â heâs always got a book, and Dannyâs never had much artistic talent but she always want s to find a pencil, maybe some charcoals, and sketch the sight down on paper. Memory isnât enough, she needs it burned into something tangible. She wants to burn everything he does onto paper, wants to remember every little thing about him.
Then he hums, questioning and low, and Danny tries not to shiver with greed to hear it again. She hums back, her next inhale clearing her head. âWell, itâs not just me, but Sam and Tucker too. A new bar opened up downtown and we were gonna check it out, and we have enough time to add another person to the reservation.âÂ
A silence, thick and thoughtful. Jason tilts his head back to look up at her, and she removes her chin and hand to look down at him. Her hair curtains over them both, locking her into his eyes â impossibly blue, and beautifully so, with teal lining the iris.Â
He wears his thoughts on his sleeve, his brows furrowed and mouth puckered in lighthearted thoughtfulness. Quit making me want to kiss you, Danny thinks, and forces her eyes to remain on his face. Idly, her hands trace over his shirt, rising slowly to drag the back of her nail over his collarbone.Â
Jason shudders, sighs out slow, and smiles easily. âSure, what time are we leaving?â  Â
â---------
Danny sighs as if she aches; she does. Her fingers find Jason Toddâs hair, soft and slipping between her fingers like silk. Heâs so close to her face she can feel his breath on her lips, itâs driving her crazy with it.Â
âMy god.â She murmurs, her voice slipping out without her consent as her fingers drop from his hair to trace featherlight touches down his temples, down his jaw. His eyes havenât left hers, half-lidded they are, and heavy, staring at her like he might just swallow her whole.Â
Please do, she thinks, tilting her head to the side to slot their noses next to each other. His hands tighten at her waist, fingers digging through her hoodie into her skin. He hums, questioningly, low and rumbling like a thunderstorm on the horizon. As if he canât trust his voice to say something instead.Â
Danny chokes on nothingâs heat and runs her thumb over his bottom lip, the flesh catching briefly on her nail. She canât think straight with him so close to her. Not when heâs so close she can smell his cologne, not when heâs so close she can lean down and sink her teeth into his throat and leave a bruise. She should, it might clear her head.Â
Instead, she sighs again, her mouth so close to his that she brushes over his lips when she says; âYouâre divine.âÂ
In the end, she doesnât need to think about leaving bruises on his throat, because Jason closes that centimetersâ worth of distance between each other and kisses her like he needs air.Â
â---------
âDo you have to go, love?â Arms snake around her waist, slipping easily over her dress, and Danny laughs, soft and easy, as Jason pulls her flush against his chest and drops his head into the crook over her shoulder. He dwarfs her in the mirror, capable of curling around her entirely, and she raises a gloved hand to rake her fingers through his soft hair.
Danny hums deeply, tilting to bare her throat as Jason starts pressing kisses to the skin. âVlad will be upset if I donât show up.â She wasnât sure of the importance of this party, but Vlad had promised her a hefty bribe to show up, and call her greedy but damn if she wasnât going to turn it down. Â
Teeth bite gentle at the underside of her jaw, and Danny laughs out of surprise. Jason smiles, indenting it into her skin, and his hand finds the slit of her dress and covers the burn scar on the outside of her thigh. âWhat about running late?â He asks, something impish in his tone. âIâve never seen you wear this one; you look good in red.âÂ
Danny laughs again, turns her head to catch his lips against hers, and kisses him long and sweet. âYes, heâll be mad if Iâm late.â She says when she pulls back.Â
He pouts, and really, how else is Danny supposed to react other than kiss him again? So she does, happily. âWake me up when you get back,â Jason murmurs against her mouth, chasing after her, âI want to help you undress.âÂ
â---------
Some days, death creeps up on her, and the phantom pains of it render her coiled into a ball in her bed. She wakes up at three am burning, her starburst scars rooting down to her bones to remind her of the feeling of being torn apart by the atoms and stitched back together again.Â
Danny can feel her heart beating in her ears, fast and panicked like she ran a marathon, filling her mouth with iron and the urge to cough out her lungs. Thereâs a scream stuck in the back of her throat like a spider sac, and she writhes with her head in her arms for what feels like an hour before she forces herself out of bed, mind half-muddled like a zombie.Â
Jason is still asleep, Danny doesnât have half the mind to be grateful, she shuffles herself down into the garage and grabs a compressed canister from the fridge, hidden in a false shelf. She might not keep ectoplasm in the kitchen, but she does in the garage.Â
She returns on second nature to the bathroom. She locks the door, shuts the drain, and runs the water to boiling, and doesnât stop the faucet until the water reaches the little drain in the wall beneath that prevents overflow. The compressed canister cracks open with a hiss, and Danny dumps whatâs probably an ounce of ectoplasm into the steaming water.
The effect is instantaneous, the water swirling and turning bright with ectoplasm all the way down. Itâs diluted, and Danny only remembers to take off her sleep shirt before she slips into the water.Â
Relief sinks into her, and chases away the worst of the pain. She sighs, she can breathe again, and dunks her head beneath the water.Â
Then doesnât get out until sheâs freezing again and nearly peeling with wrinkles.Â
(She goes downstairs when sheâs changed into dry clothes and her hair is damp, and then collapses into Jasonâs lap. Her face finds the crook of his neck, and Danny slumps, arms wrapping around his neck.)
(Jasonâs hands find her waist, and his thumbs rub circles into her side, slipping under her shirt to run over the raised skin of the burn there. âWhatâs wrong?â He asks, murmuring low and close to her ear.)
(âPhantom pains.â Danny mumbles.)
(âWhere?â)
(âEverywhere.â)Â
â---------
When Danny returns home after finding Jason again, she feels numb, she feels cold. Her engagement ring is heavy on her finger and she feels like an outsider looking in when she looks down at it.Â
She canât get the way he looked at her out of her mind. Itâs seared into her brain.Â
Her back hits the door, and slowly she slides down it, a sob building in her throat. Her lip curling, her heart aching, her heart breaking. Too many questions inside her head for her to try and sort through them, but one is prevalent; Jason Todd is a liar. Â
Danny shrieks his name so loud that she breaks her ceiling lights, and takes out the power throughout the entire block. There are dogs howling, cars wailing outside. Thereâs broken glass beneath her, scattered across the ground, cutting into her palms, and she hurts so much she wants to take the biggest shard and shred herself into ribbons.Â
â---------
The memory fades away back into its small star-shape, and floats back up to the ceiling of her lairâs observatory. Danny watches it go, something small and aching still in her chest. Two weeks since she moved into the Zone, and she hates that she still loves him. She loves that she still loves him.Â
She hates that she still misses him. She still visits Sam and Tucker, but Amity Park is tainted with the memory of Jason Todd; she needs away from it for a little while. Maybe a long while. Sheâs not too sure right now, she just needs to stay away. Somewhere where she canât run into him.Â
Danny pulls down another star to watch another memory again. One where they're dancing.
#dpxdc#danny fenton is not the ghost king#dpxdc crossover#dpdc#fem danny fenton#amnesic jason todd#dead on main#dpxdc ficlet#starry's writing#who gets amnesia twice!? prompt au#credit goes to kuroishuuha because this was their prompt that inspired this#cw mildly suggestive#danny's 'obsession' being more about her own personal safety along with the safety of her loved ones just makes sense to me in this au#i have so many thoughts about her and jason its lowkey ridiculous.#in my head danny got into boxing and she also has a ton of scars from ghost fights and burn scars from the portal accident#yes that *is* a reference to the fact that Dean Winchester voiced the Red Hood in UTRH! And also I imagined Jason in the#s1 Dean leather jacket and promptly lost my fucking mind. so now he has that. in my head he was undercover when he got amnesia blasted#and the amnesia was from a magic user. and that when he regained his memories the magic got all fucky wucky and thats why he forgot danny.#it didn't exactly go away it just malfunctioned for some reason and latched on to the only other memories he had. accidentally releasing#the hold it had on his prior memories in turn. it's just horrible luck all around folks. bad end jason is having a terrible time frankly.#so is danny but they're kinda suffering on the same yet different frequencies. danny can't understand why jason would run off on her#and thought he was pretending not to know her. it threw her entire perception of him into question and whether or not the last three#years were even real or if he was just a fantastic actor. she's obsessively rewatching memories of them together to try and figure out if#he ever let his 'facade' slip around her and she just didn't notice. and also because she just. really fucking misses him. he disappeared#for three months. she was worried sick. they were supposed to be married by now. she had to call all their venues and cancel. she returned#her wedding dress. she's hurting terribly right now. Jason is like. one wrong rubber band snap from pulling a Tim. He didn't fall out of#love. he forgot and now he's remembering and he's still madly in love with his fiancé. its only been 3mo but now she's dead and he is just.#SUFFERING. someone keep an eye on him yall. he's not doing too hot. the waynes are cursed to never get married ifykyk
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one of the many reasons I love Rachel's POV is that she just does not get Marco. Not at all. Jake and Tobias know hes putting up a front more often than not, and Cassie especially sees right through him, but Rachel buys the mask. She even thinks, originally, that Marco might be against fighting just to annoy them. I'm not even sure that Rachel ever really understands how deep Marco goes down the rabbit hole.
Like, I don't think she's doing anything that Marco doesn't want her to-- She isn't being mean or anything. I don't think it's because she dislikes him, or because they're constantly fighting. Marco is doing this on purpose. He puts on a mask with everyone, but Rachel, especially, and she buys it hook, line, and sinker.
And it really makes you think, like-- How long did Marco and Rachel know each other before his mom died? Is she basing her assumptions off a boy that doesn't exist anymore? Is that why Marco keeps up the front with her, or is it because she's the most popular, the prettiest, and the strongest? Did Marco have a crush on Rachel before his entire world fell apart? Is that why he's desperate for her to never realize it did?
#shut up az#animorphs#marco/rachel was my first ever animorphs ship and now as an adult I'm like wow it would go so poorly#because Rachel just does not get Marco at ALL#and I think Marco definitely adored Rachel at the beginning of the series and that's part of why he couldn't stand Tobias#but I also think he gave up pretty soon after realizing how similar they were#like it does not escape me that Marco and Rachel both open books using their morphs to attack people#like. they are so. fucking similar sometimes#and I think Marco seeing that he and Rachel are similar only in their most ill advised moments would turn him off a little#and now I'm like wow it probably doesn't help that Rachel has never once given any indication that she realizes he's changed#like he will always be the same old annoying shitty best friend of his cousin and on one hand he appreciates the nostalgia of that#but that's not who he is anymore. you can't love something that doesn't exist. so Marco just. Lets go.#(falls in love with an alien instead)
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I donât think the âmad at and separated from everyone because they lied to me (ie didnât tell me the whole truth) so Iâm storming offâ plot device would work on me, rip to every character thatâs been used on ever but Iâm different
#Iâd find out and I might be a little sad cause I feel left out at most#but generally Iâm pretty sure my gut reaction would be oh you guys were trying to protect me/werenât sure how to tell me this yet I get it#understandable moving on#thatâs not the kind of lie/omission that feels like betrayal!#sometimes I wonder if it does to any actual person irl or if itâs just a convenient plot device for drama#weigh in if itâs real or not#I would be hurt about being lied to in other contexts#Like. Someone using me obviously. Lying so I do something to their advantage#Bite scratch hiss about that#But thatâs not what most âyou didnât tell me everything so Iâm so madâ plot turns are about#Rip especially to that hallmark girl who found out the guy she liked had been reminding the guy she was dating of stuff she said#in front of them BOTH that she liked to help him because that was his little cousin and then got mad and broke it off#Girl he REMEMBERED STUFF YOU SAID and was helping his YOUNGER COUSIN WHO GOT HEARTBROKEN before either of you ever cared about each other#and whom you decided to date even though you knew there was a big discrepancy in his actions!#Why are you mad??#boys will be boys#<-cause this was spawned from Malia getting mad that they didnât immediately tell her about Peter since they were trying to figure out how
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Still thinking about this bc being a shitty teacher isn't the same as being evil and yet- *gets shot*
#Porter discourse bc good god if theres ever a character that I could write at length about their character assassination its him#Porter becoming comically evil for a bit I can handle but then the grooming being tacked on is like horrific in a way thats like.. okay#but why did that have to happen??#and I don't think brennan meant anything malicious by it y'know? it was more like 'hey! Emily would LOVE this & she'll still play fig!'#And yes the seeds were planted in sophomore year with the nightmare kings crown and Ragh#But we also saw how he was when working with other students and how much he cared for Ragh zelda and Fig like he was proud of his students#HE BECAME PROUD OF GORGUG#So to find out he was basically just grooming Kip is like- and then the seriousness of the grooming isnt addressed#its not handled with the level of seriousness like when the table realizes Bobby Dawn groomed Sandra Lynn#It's played as a bit and it feels like are we eating our cake and then having it too by making him a bumbling idiot in the finale when#he was shown as clever enough to fly under the radar except to fig who in the meta emily kept playing up the porter is evil bit bc no one#else believed it and it was funny to play up fig being extra sus of him#but then its also like okay we dont care about the grooming now also because it was kipperlily who they were beefing with- its just?#I wish the grooming never because part of it and I feel like thats the thing that bothers me about junior year and Porter specifically#AGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH#Porter cliffbreaker#not main d20 tagging this bc i know I'll look fucking insane but I do think porter as the big bad couldve been cleaner and it made me lose#a little faith in the storytelling of FH and made me not want a senior year#it kinda turned me off from d20 like i just have been less interested and the last 3 episodes are a massive reason why#and now theres too much shit left hanging so its like.. we kinda need a senior year but its like.. ehh.
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is episode 8 the domitian arc ? more on this and EVEN MORE narratives iâve been ignoring that the show said âactually,,,â about in 5
#hermes staying domitianâs hand⊠hermesâ face a flash of discomfort when he was torturing tenax⊠hmm. character growth.#WHAT WAS THAT HERMES. WHAT WAS THAT LOOK. NO GIRL GET BACK HERE I CANNOT ALSO DO THIS NARRATIVE OF YOU NO LONGER ABLE TO PULL HIM BACK FROM#THE BRINK OF HIS CRUELTY WATCHING HIM CHANGE AND SEEKING OUT SOMEONE ELSE IN HIS NEED AND FEAR AND ANGST. NO BABY GIRLLLL#I DONâT WANT TO WRITE A HERMES POINT OF VIEWWWW OF THE SIX YEARS HE SPENT WATCHING DOMITIAN BLOOMMMM INTO HIS POWER AND CORRUPTTTT because.#correct me if iâm wrong but in that very first scene that was a young hermes in the white right he watched domitian give his speech and saw#his father to truly see him the whole time as hermes has seen his brilliance.#NO I ALSO SAW THAT GUARDâS HEAD FOLLOW HERMES oh i hate it here. you know what i also hate? i need domitian to be successful for tenax#but also i do kinda like titus⊠NOOOOOO NO KILLING TITUS DOMITIAN I JUST SAID I LIKED HIM!!!! DOMITIAN!!!#oh. ohhhh no. OH NOOOO okay listen we can redeem this. we can have the whole turning point of the narrative be domitianâs mercy of hermes#the ultimate staying of his hand. proving heâs not entirely gone that hermes & his love still means something. do i think this will happen#no absolutely not. before he can kill his brother domitian has to kill the only other living person he loves perhaps more than titus if he#could ever realize it. (a brief interlude to yell LETâS GO LESBIANS LETâS GO HI IRIS) domitian⊠please spare him⊠OH WAIT HELLO THE BLOOD!!#ALSO a brief interlude to say i knew it was coming but ELIAâS SPEECH ABOUT LOVING INCITATUS??? I WAS ON THIS INCITATUS SHIT WITH THE LITTLE#NOD THEY HAD WHERE SCORPUS CALLED HIM TO BEAT XENON OH MY GOD I CANâT BELIEVE THIS!!! eliaâs going to crush him. incitatus wonât listen.#scorpus is going to die twice once when they call eliaâs name instead of his and then the second time when the scorpion bites him again#(he kills himself and tenax finds him. sorry to give everyone absolutely maximum damage here but uh. thatâs how i can see it going down)#or alternatively worse: after killing titus who at times he loves and hates in equal measure (if yâall donât think I have some UNHINGED#brothers quotes. weâll keep mum here about why but suffice to say it is. relevant to other fandoms. and thus i have a Collection) the last#thing domitian has to do is kill hermes. and this one is both out of betrayal but also love because I think somewhere in here titusâ queen#berenice plays a role because domitianâs hatred of the jews probably comes to play a role and I think titus would show up and protect her#like Domitian engineers some kind of a situation where in theory titus could escape alive or beat him but he canât do that & save berenice#and so of course he saved berenice. or she dies in his arms and he goes mad with grief and any way you put it berenice is the trap & titus#happily crawls into the lionâs mouth to save her for love of her etc and domitian sees him die for it. he gives titus every chance to come#back to him to work with him to be what he wants him to be and he always chooses himself he chooses love and domitian canât understand even#when it makes him weak. and then he sees hermes dirty and emaciated and still terribly terribly beautiful and feels such a pang of longing#and love that he decides he has to die because he (domitian) cannot be weak. he cannot have any of it. also giving domitian worse paranoia#than he already has because if you kill your brother the one person who should always love youâsupport youâwho can build me a new brotherâ#youâve gotta generate some MAJOR issues. namely trust issues. and if he kills hermes theyâll be even worse. so like ideally To Me domitian#wouldnât kill him but i do very much see the symbolism of cutting off his last earthly tie & desire to ascend to the divine imperial throne#those about to die
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does anyone know if we have to roll that rock up the hill again tomorrow
#so to recap what we all know if we're following the Angela is Sickly series#i can't eat tree nuts. i can't eat trail mix that has come in contact with tree nuts. i am uneasy about eating anything that has been in a#facility with tree nuts because i have had allergic reactions just as severe from cross-contamination as i have had from straight up#eating walnuts. the one exception to this rule is pistachios because i have yet to have an issue with them#i don't eat pecans anymore because i had a reaction. almonds are on thin ice i don't really eat them#also. also i dislike nuts. it's not a hard rule but i don't like them at all. i am not a picky eater they just happen to be one of the#foods i dislike they're a bad texture and they taste like wood. except for the beautiful pistachio#and then we have the alpha gal allergy so. it's not Nearly as severe in terms of life-threatening anaphylaptic response but#the trade-off is a week-long world ending stomachache. which is extremely not fun and also could at any point randomly turn into#a more severe allergy so i. sort of don't fuck with it. there are exceptions that i regret every time because ouch. no red meat.#similarly. we respond not too great to dairy. can't have a lot. can't be fixed by lactaid pills or anything because it's not lactose#intolerance it's an allergy. so. no tree nuts except pistachios. no red meat. light dairy. i am twenty pounds underweight.#my doctor told me to keep red meat in my diet if i couldn't maintain my weight and uh. Bad News i can't maintain weight but also it's a#massive trigger so what the fuck do i do here. to be allergic to some of the most caloric and fatty foods out there#tried to start up boosts and i will continue doing so but im getting stomachaches from them too. like the fuck do u do#im eating eggs and avocado and olive oil and peanut butter etc and im still losing weight. i don't ever have an appetite#gets to a point where im like Well we might end up in a fucking hospital because i keep losing weight and idk why#tests aren't showing anything other than alpha gal and minor inflammation we don't have a reason for#tomorrow i will fucking have egg and avocado and olive oil and butter and a boost and an antispasmodic and water and#i will get a stomachache again and be tired again. Onward!#i would feel so much better if i could gain weight and i can't. what do. im so tired all the time <3 15.8bmi <3
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i continue to find ii3 baffling. why did they make it (this isn't to hate on the season, i'm genuinely curious)
#melonposting#this isn't meant to be ii neg by the way. i'm just confused about AE's writing choices#i don't remember if they ever said explicitly? at the very least i haven't heard an official answer#i don't think it was initially for any plot reason. my theory is that it's for the same reason bfb and tpot split#the episodes were taking really long to make and they wanted to go back to regular lighthearted uploads. which is understandable#so while ii2 was cooking they could still post new ii episodes with reasonable frequency#but that also raises so many questions#the biggest: why the hell is mephone here#seriously i know people like mephone but i'm sure having a different host wouldn't turn literally everyone off#and mephone hosting this show causes so many strange easily avoidable problems#like the screwy timeline. mephone ditches his show for what he experiences to be years and yet ii2 is continuing like normal#only a day has passed for them. why? maybe they'll try to explain it#in any event if ii3 had a different host this wouldn't even be an issue#but then they made ii3 really plot heavy for mephone which then ended up screwing itself over#the season justified itself as being mephone trying to escape from his problems#and he goes through character development to address all of his baggage and how much of a jerk he can be#that suddenly makes what seems to have been meant to be a lighthearted offshoot season into an imperative piece of his character (bizarre)#which would inevitably make his return to ii2 really weird cuz that would mean he had his redemption arc basically off-screen#but then they didn't even do that????? in the new episode mephone is still his old bastard self. nothing like late ii3 mephone#which means that they're effectively retconning ii3's plot out of existence. as it is ii 15 barely acknowledged anything specific from ii3#but this in particular is especially absurd. ii2 can continue like normal only because they're acting like ii3 never happened#which is just insane to me. why even give mephone character development in ii3 to begin with???????#why does ii3 even exist????????????????????? his character development is literally the in-universe justification for the season#i'm so confused#i'm just glad ii2 can proceed like normal :thumbsup: but these are seriously some puzzling writing decisions
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I am this fkn close to banning my mom and stepdad to the backseat of the car and having my sister in shotgun istg
#I would except she really doesn't pay attention to anything so if i really do miss sth she isn't gonna catch it#But fucking god they turn into the worst passengers ever when i drive#'you have to be able to tak a little criticism' their criticism: grabbing the gear shift/handbreak while im driving#Or turning off the radio or telling me 'DON'T talk just concentrate on driving' after i say a single word??#And the constant switching between telling me to go faster and telling me to go slower#And god beware i see something they didn't catch. 'why did you not stop at that intersection?!'#Because i saw that there were no cars at all and I'm allowed to keep driving in that situation 'Well i didn't see that yet so you cant have'
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TUMBLR WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS.
COMMUNITIES TAB IN THE MIDDLE OF THE LOWER BAR???!!! đĄđĄđĄđĄđĄđĄ
#tumblr updates#tumblr#IM SO FUCKING TIRED OF APPS CHANGING SHIT AROUND THAT WAS GOOD#maybe my emotions are elevated bc outside stressors and Iâm high or smth#but FISHEKXHIWJXIWJDIWJDJEJDNEJ CHRIST#itâs filling me with boiling rage. Istfg itâs like ptsd or shit (not really ik)#just like#Instagram turning into a fucking shithole when it adding the shopping tab and moved the âlikesâ button#like URGHHHHHHHH#enshittification#tumblr is its own trap because what other social media never ever shows follower count(or other public stats#that fuck u over mentally#etc etc.#idk itâs just like. am I gonna have to create a faux-tumblr app that would be so hard to market in this era of lonely spin-off apps#where can I engage in fandoms this way.#thereâs so much fandom history and internet history in general on tumblr. itâs a shame to turn this app into the same garbage that people#barely stand on other apps. that I canât fucking stand which is why I LEFT those other apps#mypost#ik thereâs that web tumblr extension that lets u alter hella tumblr stuff#but I hold so much anger towards the idea that an app could force me to access it through hella 3rd-party modifications
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Thinking about current continuity Vanessa and just getting pissed off again
Like one, LET HER REST oh my god dc you ruin her FUCKING life like an asshole only to bring her back as a villain after she finally got out oh my god-
But also like its just so bad. This is a whole other woman with her name like why are we doing this. Like first you kill her mom (JULIA NOOO) and erase her YEARS of history growing up around diana (the thing that actually made her villain turn [if you can call it that w the level of manipulation involved] interesting and fucking heartbreaking) for some shitty "oh I saved you we were friends" run of the mill whatever. Then to use that and say Nessie had a crush on her OWN SISTER (Diana, so like informally adopted, but still đĄ) now????
And then they took away her curls and made her a redhead but not even the realistic kind. DC SHE DOESNT LOOK LIKE THAT
It just makes me so mad. Freaking guys. They could have used another name like oh my god. She's not even the first silver swan why the fuck would they do that if they're not going to explore her history w diana (which she no longer has!!!!) or how intensely fucked up everything got for her. What is even the fucking point of this then other to drag a main character of the ww supporting cast through the mud again for genuinely no reason. They could have easily had her be Valerie Beaudry (sorry Val) instead or just MADE UP ANOTHER NAME because it's obvious that no one actually cared about her as a character they just wanted the wondy villain back so like !!!!!!!!!! Why even bother
#her entire treatment just makes me so angry#like in general it makes me mad and sad and a million other emotions#but the fucking robinson version just makes me enraged. beyond pissed off. because theres no fucking reason for it its bullshit and its the#one in current continuity right now. so i get to see tom king ww panels put on my dash that have this stupid fake vanessa and its so#infuriating. like thats NOT her!!!!!!! oh my freaking god people#her hair is BROWN and CURLY and shes dianas BABY SISTER who she lived with for YEARS like she was a MAJOR supporting ww character for the#longest time. like shes got about 100 appearances (just checked) preboot this is not a minor character#so freaking frustrating#blah#ALSO. FUCKING ALSO. THE FACT THAT THE WHOLE CURRENT VANESSA TURNED EVIL BC SHE REALIZED SHE WASNT SPECIAL TO DIANA BS. FUCK YOU THERE LIKE#OH MY GODDDDD âisnt special to dianaâ im going to fucking kill you. what do you mean she doesnt care about her specially. thats her FUCKING#BABY SISTER. not to sound like vanessa herself a la silver swan but those clowns at dc would never say that shit about cassie oh my god#not special my FUCKING ass. nessie and her mom were literally the first people invited to themyscira in post coie continuity#like yes diana trevor and steve trevor and even baby julia kapetelis washing ashore but like the kapetelises (and you could even say just#nessie bc again her mom had been there before) were the FIRST ones invited there like you cannot say diana didnt care about them more than#the average joe dc i fucking despise you.#this girl has been through so much why is dc incapable of throwing her a bone ever. nessie i am so sorry they did that to you sweetie.#gonna tag it bc her tag deserves the traffic#vanessa kapatelis#just makes me so mad#doing all that to the normal teen girl character in a wonder woman comic is so fucked actually like dc comics i should not have to explain#that to you. what message do you think you are sending here be serious
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going back through some of this fandom's history has made me realise, we really see people as black and white good or bad don't we?
#like i hope we're getting better (i think we are)#but it has me wondering. how much fandom treatment of 5sos partners was based off one specific incident#but also shaped how people viewed that one specific incident?#i'm glad we want our faves to be well and happy. i just think we also are not immune to misogyny sometimes#guess who just watched the lie to me mv for the first time ever#it's important that people get to tell their stories don't get me wrong. and there was a lot of authenticity in this#however if our instinct is to just totally not ever believe women we also have to ask ourselves why#at least people were really glad for sierra at the time? but look how that went. she was human and people turned on her too#these things can both be true. sometimes women to genuinely bad things. AND we hold women to impossible standards#and then dehumanise them the minute we do something wrong#which is bound to happen at some point!#also. someone can still be a good person and not make good decisions 100% of the time. think about that before you disregard#something someone says being like 'my fave would never they must be lying' why is lying our go-to? yes they might be lying but#this shouldn't be our assumption. just because people are reluctant to admit our faves might not be Completely Perfect#fwiw i think rn we're doing a lot better in terms of that though. in terms of destigmatising mental illness and addiction too#it's just. reality is often just complicated? no one's all good or all bad. yes people should be free to tell the story of their experience#but in order to be ethical consumers of their story we need to realise that just because it highlights one aspect of someone#it doesn't mean that's all there is to them. and it doesn't mean that's all there is to the story either (even though it's not false!)#like how we're been discussing in swiftie spaces. storytelling is GOING TO BE BIASED. when we acknowledge that we won't be as reactive
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The lil corner of the Good Omens fandom that I generally see is getting more and more into publicly declaring that That Theory I Dislike Is Bad And People Who Ascribe To It Should Feel Bad, and I don't know if it's really new, or if I was just lucky enough to generally be missed with that shit the last four years.
Different people's brains work differently, which means they will notice things, form interpretations, maybe come to extremely firm conclusions, all different from each others'. Different from mine, different from yours.
I get that some people think that they have the brain which produces the Objectively Superior theories (and/or which can easily determine which other people's theories are the Objectively Inferior ones). I just really missed the memo where Your Interpretation Is Not My Interpretation (And That's Okay) was dragged out back and fucking shot.
Anyway this blog is an "I may not agree with your theory but you may trust that I won't publicly heap scorn upon the very idea of having it" zone if anyone was wondering.
#negativity#discourse type stuff#apparently i can't turn off replies to a specific post? but i am Not Interested in discussing why that kind of behavior is okay actually#also Not Interested in hearing about how i'm overreacting#unless you are prepared to prove that you have personally catalogued everything that I have read/seen/etc on this topic#this is not about any one specific post just about the bizarrely judgemental zeitgeist#also not about any of the posts where someone is like 'huh i know people like this theory but i'm not sure here let me tell you why'#i've always seen posts like those and those are great because YTINMTATO remains intact#JUST. yeah. Not Interested in discussing this at all really#but i've seen some posts that made me feel bad for being so unthinking as to ever find merit in this or that theory#and i'm probably not the only one feeling bad?#so you can think x character is fake or y character is secretly running everything from behind the curtain or z object was drugged#(or none of these things at all!!)#and i 100% promise i am not scoffing at the foolishness of falling for such a completely unsupported idea#i PROMISE i am not going to be mean#because if i wanted to *reduce* the amount of kindness in the world then i wouldn't have created the fucking Soft Zone now would I
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