#because where else would you ever get to see that shit

[becausegoodheroesdeservekidneys]

When you point out how neurodiversity affects whole areas of the brain, not just what we see as the presentation symptoms, it seems so obvious. I've known that many neurodivergent conditions have high rate of co-morbidities, but haven't thought about what that would mean. I really liked your explanation of what else dyslexia affects, it made me recategorise some of my sister's mom behaviours. I see time blindness, some executive dysfunction, organisation difficulties and go, yup, I've got that too, it's normal, and forget that most people don't struggle with that (I've suspected I have undiagnosed ADHD for years, but never got checked for it, since I suggested it my dad freaked out, insisting there was nothing wrong with me. I really should though)

May I ask how your synaesthesia manifests for you? I'm always curious about how neurodiversity manifests in people and how it affects them, because there are so many minor and major things not talked about. I apologise if that question makes you uncomfortable, you don't have yo answer it.

Anyway, thank you for your explanation! It made a lot of things click all at once for me.

If you want lots of examples of how my synaesthesia works, I have a tag you could trawl here. But, I have a few different types; the common numbers-have-colours one, but I also get textures and sensations and feelings, and about... literally everything. Numbers, words, people's voices, names, personalities, the plots of media, images, everything.

Soooo, yeah. Sensory overload is the big impact; trial and error over the years has shown me it's primarily auditory, so if I can wear earplugs I can cope for longer in 'busy' environments. The other thing is that it really does a number on my mathematical ability, though, because, I shit you not, the colours get in the way. When I was a small child I was shown that 3 + 5 = 8, and my brain went "Yes, orange + pink = brown, got it" and ever since then if I see a 3 and a 5 together in a sum it DOES NOT MATTER what the operator is, I immediately assume the answer is 8. 3 plus 5? 8. 3 minus 5? Also 8. 3 times 5? Buddy you'll never guess. But it's 8.

It takes conscious effort not to do this T_T

The other thing is that I really, REALLY suffer from this thing where someone goes "Hey, we should watch Program X" but the problem is, you see, the problem is, I cannot stand the sensation I get from the name Program X, and therefore I will not watch it out of disgust that is totally unrelated to the actual show. This applies to all media, places, human beings, etc. (It is obviously a thing I have to be careful of when it's human beings.)

I think everything else I have is ADHD-related though, so that's probably everything I can put down to the synaesthesia.

[wittlesissyb4by]

Sweetie Todd

Men are soo desperate. It’s honestly a bit too easy. Do you know how many virgin losers I have at my disposal? They will do anything they can, just for a picture of my tits, anything for a bit of female attention. Take this little fairy for example. He dm’d me on Insta only a few weeks back.

‘Hey I like your pics.’ He said, ‘any way I can see you with the clothes off? 😏’

In the past, I would kick these pervs to the curb. Block, ignore, sometimes even report. But some were so desperate they actually offered to pay me. Just for a pic of my nips or even my feet. At first I declined, but times are tough, and a girl’s gotta eat, right?

So I let them. I’d let them cashapp me in exchange for a pic or two. It felt kind of dirty, but I told myself girls will do much worse for much less.

But they kept asking for more, instead of appeasing them, they kept asking for more. The money came in, sure, but I would quickly run out of content if I indulged them with every transaction. There's only so many ways to take a tit pic, and I refuse to subject myself to much more than that.

I quickly learned that if I strung them along, they would become even more desperate. One guy started to annoy me, becoming particularly pushy, so I told him to go fuck himself. Tell me why he literally sent me a video of him shoving a dildo up his ass less than 24 hours later?! It was gross, but that got me thinking...

If he was willing to do that just to see a pic of me, what else could I make these desperate little dorks do?

I told a guy to eat cat food, told another to fuck the crease of the couch cushions, even suggested to another that he stick his head in doo doo he found at the dog park.

They all did it. Every. Single. One. And they even paid me for the privilege!!

When I posted a video of a guy slamming a baseball bat between his legs and thanking me with every bash of his balls, the messages really started flooding in.

Men everywhere were begging to be dominated and, I'm not gonna lie, I kinda liked it. The attention was nice, my followers grew exponentially, and the money was pouring in. I didn't even have to show my tits anymore, just had to tell them to shove a tampon up their ass and keep it in for the rest of the day.

Virgin after pathetic virgin started subbing.

Eventually, my little 'tasks' for them became more and more devious. Buying and wearing a pair of panties was too easy. I wanted the full ensemble, and I wanted them to walk through their favorite sports bar with it on.

Some checked out at that point, but others, the most dedicated and desperate, stayed.

Then, I found it. One sub was being particularly whiney, so I suggested he go buy a pack of Depends diapers for being such a baby. He did, and it was the most hilarious thing I've ever seen. A grown man wearing nothing but a diaper and sucking on his thumb is truly a sight to see! Even better when you make them squat down and shit themselves. Even the most dedicated were absolutely broken at that point. It reduces them to nothing. I've taken control of everything at that point, all the way down to when and wear they use the bathroom. Yes, they now have to beg me (pay me) to poop their pampers. They have to pay extra if they want to cum, and they don't get to change their filthy diaper before they do.

This picture you see is of Todd. He's an investment banker. Todd originally messaged me for pictures of my feet and maybe a little domination here or there, I don't really remember. At this point, I don't really care. He got put through the ringer just like the rest of them. I do specifically remember him throwing a fit when he first had to wear the diaper. Or 'nappy', as he calls it, because apparently that's how they say it in Britain where he's from.

He told me 'no' at first. Said he'd never do it. That he was 'too much of a man' for that.

"Okay." was all I said, and left it at that.

Two weeks later, he'd sent me a pic of the nappies he bought. That's another thing I've learned too: when you push a guy's limits, he may resist at first, but eventually the horny/submissive brain always wins. They will do anything to please. Anything for a little attention.

But Todd didn't get to just wear diapers, no no. His dumbass tried to tell me he's 'too much of a man'. So now he gets to wear nothing but frilly dresses when he's at home. I randomly send check-ins to ensure he's doing as he's told. If not, he's punished. It's easy to get them to do what I want, because every day I just accrue more and more pictures/videos to blackmail them with if they refuse.

Todd got to suck his first dick the other day at some random truck stop! He swears up and down that he's not gay--and I actually believe him--but I also don't care. It's way too entertaining to see diaper dorks suck a dick for baby batter and thank me for it while they gargle it in their mouth.

One of my subs also let me in on a little thing called a 'chastity device', so guess what Todd will be putting on and sending me the key to? I'm sure he'll earn it back at some point. Three, maybe six months from now, I'll mail it back to him. If he's a good baby gurl, that is...

~~~~~~~~

Image Source: frilledpansy on imagefap

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[lovecla]

TAKE YOUR PAIN AWAY | quinn hughes.

00.3. your last day with quinn

➴ warnings: mention of a restrictive diet, constipation.

➴ word count: 1.7k

➴ author’s note: this was supposed to be a cute, hurt/comfort chapter but. i listened to madison beer while writing this so things took a turn and now it’s just depressing. at least there’s still some hurt/comfort here :,)

౨ৎ

2017, SEPTEMBER.

YOU were having the worst day ever.

It was a Friday, and one of those days where anything that could possibly go wrong, went wrong. First, you woke up at half-past five with a fever that made your entire body shiver. Your pajama was glued to your body, sticky with sweat. You sat on the bed, immediately regretting it because your head started spinning and suddenly you needed to throw up everything you’d eaten for dinner last night.

You felt like shit even when you managed to shower, sitting on your bathtub and letting the tears fall from your face. You felt so tired. It had already been a very stressful week, with your Mom forcing you to attend castings and auditions, making calls here and there so you could get the jobs she wanted for you, controlling everything you ate and drank.

On top of all of that, Peter and Quinn were leaving for college and you were sure you had never felt so alone before.

Quinn became your favorite person in the entire world when you both met four years ago. He was so important to you, and even though sometimes your heart didn’t understand what exact feelings you had for him, you needed him in your life.

The friendship you’d built over the past four years meant the world to you. How he took care of you, and how he tried to balance his career with still trying to be present in your life. How he would always ask about how you were doing in school, or about your dreams and wants. How he had introduced you to his family and how Jim and Ellen were nice to you, letting you come over to do your homework with Jack or Luke.

How sometimes you’d find Quinn practicing in their homemade ice rink, and you’d watch him for hours, impressed by his moves and skills. How sometimes you’d notice his hair falling out of the helmet, the sweat decorating his face and his blue, greenish eyes that would stare at nothing but the puck.

So when you found out he was leaving for Michigan? It hurt more than anything else, even if you were extremely happy for him.

You got out of the shower, feeling your body hurt everywhere. You were thankful that your classes didn’t start until next week and you didn’t have any auditions today so you could just jump right back in your bed.

Which was exactly what you did, sleeping like the dead after letting your tears fall for a bit more.

You woke up a few hours later, with a soft touch on your arm. Opening your eyes and immediately feeling them getting wet, you saw Quinn standing beside your bed.

“Hey there, sleepyhead,” he said, smiling. “Maria let me in. You didn’t come say goodbye to me.”

Your sick, tired brain took a little while to process what he was saying. Until you looked at the digital clock that sat on your bedside table, reading 11:34 a.m., Friday, 6 September.

Fuck.

You tried to get up, but your body still felt heavy. You were still shivering underneath the covers and your throat hurt.

“Maddie?” You could see he had stopped smiling.

You tried to smile, feeling the need to reassure him. “I’m sorry. I forgot to set an alarm,” you lied, trying to get up again and, thankfully, succeeding this time. “I’ll be downstairs in just a minute. Sorry.”

Getting up didn’t exactly mean success, since your legs failed after five steps and now you were on the floor, with your knee hurting like a bitch.

“Maddie, what,” Quinn said, quickly coming to your rescue, like he often did. You had a headache? Quinn had the right medicine for it. You hurt your finger? Quinn wrapped your hand with a bandage. You were hungry? Quinn was already in the kitchen making your meal. “What’s going on? Are you sick?”

“No, just— I just woke up.” You didn’t know why you kept lying to him and you felt like shit, but it was his leaving day. The Hughes were moving back to the US, so that Jack and Luke could join the NTDP in Michigan and Quinn could go to UMich. And it couldn’t get worse, not really. “I’m fine.”

“I can tell when you’re lying, Madison,” he hissed, angrily. You frowned. Quinn had never gotten angry at you, not even when you managed to ruin his hockey uniform with glitter. “You’re sick. Did you eat?”

“Yeah,” you mumbled, as he walked you to bed again. “I am fine, Quinn. It’s just constipation or whatever.”

“Stop acting like this is nothing, Madison.”

“Stop calling me that,” you frowned, annoyed for no real reason. You were going to miss them so much.

“It’s your name, isn’t it?” He raised his eyebrow.

“Why are you being so mean?” You whispered, feeling your eyes tearing up again, the fever making you shiver.

He stopped scowling for a second, softening his eyes at you. He sat beside you, placing his hand on your thigh, which you promptly grabbed. “I’m sorry, I wasn’t trying to be mean. It’s just— I hate when you act like what happens to you isn’t important.”

You squeeze his hand, feeling less cold now.

“You’re like my little sister, so watching you sick is just as upsetting as it is with Lukey or Jack,” he chuckled, laughing like he hadn’t just shattered your feelings right there.

You didn’t know exactly what you felt for him, but you knew for a fact it wasn’t that silly admiration you had for him when you were little. You were fifteen now, and just when you were supposed to crush on the boys at your school, you were always comparing them to Quinn instead. And Quinn is always better than them.

Not to mention that he’d been getting cuter. He was losing his teenager features and it didn’t help it with your little infatuation for him.

Hearing him confirming that you were nothing but a family member to him stung. This was definitely the worst day of your life.

“Right,” you whispered, releasing his hand and wrapping your arms around your body. “I don’t think I’ll be able to go downstairs and say bye to you all. I’m sorry for that.”

“We’re only leaving at night so don’t worry. We’ll make sure you’re feeling better until then.” He replied, getting up.

“Where are you going?” You asked, confusion taking over your face.

“I’m gonna ask Maria to make some soup for you while I go look for some cold medicine,” he put his hands inside his jeans pockets, something he did often, and smiled at you. “Do you think you’ll be fine here for ten minutes?”

You nodded, watching as he poked your cheek before leaving your room.

You laid down for a while, trying to organize your thoughts. You still didn’t understand what the Hughes leaving meant to you, only that you’d miss them like they were your own. Because for a while, that’s what they were.

You must have snoozed again because next thing you know, Quinn was shaking you lightly again. You opened your eyes, staring at him.

“Maria made you chicken noodle soup and I brought you juice and pills,” he pointed at the tray on your desk, smiling.

You got up, sitting up against the headboard, and thanking him as he placed the tray on your lap.

“Mom would probably kill me if she knew I’m eating noodles,” you joked, coughing loudly. Ugh.

“I won’t tell her a thing, promise,” he quickly said, sitting on the chair beside your desk, resting his hands on his knees, as he watched you eat. “Can’t believe we’re actually leaving.”

You chuckled. “Yeah.”

“You will come to visit us, right?”

You placed your spoon inside your bowl again, staring at Quinn’s face, trying to memorize all of his features at once. His upper lip, slightly thinner than his bottom one. His wavy, brown hair, messy and untamed, so beautifully shaped. His eyes, darker than Luke and Jack’s, but still bright and vibrant. His nose, big and cute and your favorite feature on his face.

Oh, you were going to miss him so much.

“‘Course I will,” you mumbled, shoving the last spoonful of soup into your mouth. Lying to Quinn always felt wrong. “I’m… I’m gonna miss you,” His eyes softened, and before he could speak, you continued. “You made my life so much easier. You and your family are so important to me so thank you.” You felt your eyes watering, and you looked up. No crying in front of anyone.

“Oh, Maddie,” he got up, removing the tray from your lap and putting it back on your desk, so he could sit beside you. “There’s no need for tears.”

You tried to give him a reassuring smile and tell him you’re okay but you only managed to let more tears fall from your eyes.

He placed your head on his shoulder, pulling the blanket until it reached your chin, covering you completely. Then, he gently grabbed your hand underneath and held it tightly.

“I’ll be only an one hour flight away, Maddie. Our house is your house too.”

You sniffled, feeling your body starting to hurt again.

You wanted to tell him that you didn’t want him to leave, that you needed him in your life and that you loved him. A young, unripe love that made your chest hurt every time you thought about it.

But you knew that you were just being selfish. Ever since you met him, you knew Hockey was his life. It is his favorite thing in the world, and it means a lot to them.

So you would never tell him anything. No. At least one of you deserved to be happy.

“I know,” you mumbled. “Can I take a nap?”

He chuckled beside you. “Yeah, ‘course. Not before you take your medicine though.”

You rolled your eyes, hiding the rest of your face under the cover, hearing Quinn’s soft laugh.

Little did you know you’d keep that sound safe and secure in your heart, for the rest of your life.

[balkanradfem]

So, it's chestnut foraging season again! And I'm having some moral struggles about it. Let's discuss.

Few years back, while roaming the forest, I found an excellent chestnut foraging stuff; it was so good I found I could gather 10 kg of chestnuts a day if I appeared there at the brink of dawn. I gifted a lot of chestnuts to the plant lady, who was impressed, and asked me to show her where I found them. I took her to the spot, and she said 'we could sell these. I can put out an add'. And that sounded daunting, but I said okay!

At first she was doing the administrative part of work, finding customers and managing the communications, and I was collecting and delivering chestnuts, but then she grew tired of it, so I took over completely, made my own add and was able to sell them just fine.

Then, the market prices of all food, including chestnuts, rose high up, as in, doubled. The plant lady urged me to up the price of my chestnuts, because they were now dirt cheap in comparison to anything else on the market, and I thought about it, and decided, no. I hate rising in prices, this little chestnut thing is the only price I can control, and I can decide for it to stay the same. It was a bit insane business-wise, because I am impoverished, but I am not letting poverty control my moral standing! The price stayed the same.

The year after, prices rose again, and I still remained stubborn, and the plant lady was trying to convince me that I am not doing a good deed; chestnuts are a luxury item, they're not being bought by people in poverty who would benefit from cheap food, what I'm doing is only going to attract resellers and other people will capitalize on my work. To this I said, well, I'm refusing to sell any quantity over 10kg to a single person, so they won't be able to capitalize that much. And I knew people who I was taking the chestnuts to were just taking them home to their families, or even asked me to split them in multiple bags to give to their neighbours and cousins. So I kept the price low.

This year, I'm sickly, having financial issues that are worse than before, still having pain in my arm and can't walk for long, and I thought, ugh. Maybe I should up the prices a little and it would make my life slightly easier. It would still be the cheapest thing on the market but I'd be less stressed. But then I went into the forest, and I forgot all of my struggles. It felt so good to hunt around for the first fallen chestnuts. I climbed a hill. I discovered a new secret spot. I found a chicken-of-the-woods mushroom. I saw a salamander. Tiniest frog ever was letting me see her. And I got a message from someone who bought chestnuts from me last year, asking if I had them again. And I didn't have whatever it takes to tell this person I've upped the price. I was like 'yeah I can get the chestnuts to you. They still cost the same amount'.

So then I had to tell the plant lady my decision, and she is SO disappointed. Her vibe was like 'you are putting yourself in situation where only resellers will benefit from this!' and I'm laughing like, don't worry about it, I'm at peace with my decision. But now I feel bad because she thinks I'm dumb T_T.

And I don't know what the right decision is. I hate capitalism, I hate the idea that the price of something can change even though it's the same item, it hasn't changed, it isn't worth more, it doesn't cost me more to gather it, so just because the state of economy is worse, and the world is going to shit, now it's going to cost more? But it is also ridiculous that on the market, the price of the chestnuts is not only double, but 4 times of what I sell them for. It feels so silly! How are people selling them for such a high price? But from their standpoint, it is me who is silly, for giving them away so cheaply.

So I'm going to see what is your collective opinion! I'm curious.

oh and btw what I'm doing is 100% illegal, we're discussing the morality of me doing illegal black market shit. Other foragers are doing it illegally too so we're equals.

[conchcronch]

How and When They Say ‘I Love You’ for The First Time - Buggy

WC: 1001

Warnings: Angst towards the end

God I love this fuckin’ clown!

- Says it during a quiet moment shared in private

-Despite being known as flashy, when it comes to his emotions he’s very private with them. It could come from his upbringing on a pirate ship where emotions made you weak, or it could come from his extremely low self esteem that you’ve been working day and night to raise.

-It took him a long time to say it to you, even if you had said it first he would have said it back but it would have been in a goofy way, tagged onto the end of a some joke. Something like “Of course you do, who wouldn’t love me?”

-It took him a long time to let anyone see the real him, since the last one to get this close to him abandoned him (Shanks) he had built his walls higher then those of Impel Down. But lately he was letting you inside these walls, showing you who he was without the makeup, without his gloves.

-It would happen on one of the nights where his bedroom door is locked, but not for the reasons he was sure to tell his crew. In reality, he was sitting cross legged between your legs while you were on his bed, one hand tightly gripping a strand of his blue locks, while the other tried to wrestle a brush through his knots.

-He was normally very conscious of his hair, tying it up to some degree before going to bed. But today he had passed out after getting back from a particularly draining Cross Guild meeting and woken up to his hair an absolute mess.

-You had walked into his room to find him quietly cussing himself for having been so careless, his makeup smeared all over his face and his normal ‘stage costume’ as he so lovingly called it, discarded on the floor leaving him in a pair of boxers and nothing else, not the worse sight to walk in on in your eyes.

-It had taken a lot of convincing, but you had somehow gotten him to agree to let you clean his face and brush his face. Touching his face was one thing, but when it came to his hair it was a whole other ordeal, especially since Mihawk and Crocodile had been using it to restrain him so much lately, Buggy was beginning to see his long tresses as a sign of his weakness.

-You had softened his resolve with kisses along his tight shoulders and quiet reassurance, his two weaknesses.

-You had underestimated how tangled his hair was, understanding now why he was so anal about brushing it and tying it up before bed, even after your more intimate nights, no matter how exhausted he was.

-“I don’t know why you insist on working with Crocodile and Mihawk, they treat you like shit. You deserve better, you know that, right Bugs?” He remained silent, not wanting to tell you about how it was because of a mountain of debt rather then by choice. If it were anyone else who said that to him, he would have been quick to tell them he loved it, but you had seen the bruises and the cuts. You knew he didn’t like it, so why waste his breath.

-When you had finally wrestled the brush through his entire mane, you carded your fingers through it in search of any knots or tangles you may have missed. When you didn’t find any, you began sectioning his hair into three parts, making sure to leave a few of the shorter pieces near the front free for your own selfish desire. As you braided his hair he gave in to your touches, letting his neck loosen before feeling you wrap a hair tie around the bottom and let his hair go after what felt like hours.

-He leaned his head back, seeing the way you smiled down at him sent butterflies through his chest and stomach.

-”I love you” the words came out so much easier then he ever expected. He hadn’t said that to anyone in decades, but seeing how you took care of him, how you disassembled his walls so easily, brick by brick. He knew he had found his other half.

-If you say it back, he’ll sit up quickly to avoid you seeing how happy tears begin to fall down his bare face. But you’re not dumb, you know him. You wrap your hands around to lead his face back into your lap, leaning down so you can press a kiss to his lips. Your hands slip down from his face, down his neck and along his bare chest, knowing the clown is extremely touch starved even after your time together.

-Buggy shows his love through physical affection, so your night has only just begun.

-If you aren’t ready to say it back, he’s heartbroken. Even if you catch it before he can pull away, no explanation can fully patch up the hurt he feels. He let down his walls with you, he let you take off his armor, and you still don’t love him? Is he really that worthless?

-He spirals more then you thought. As you try to explain your reasoning, whatever it may be, he picks up his discarded clothes, grabbing his hat from the dresser before leaving the room.

-If you chase after him, you’ll see he’s crying. He’ll tell you to leave him alone, he’ll tell you that you meant nothing to him, you were just a fun time and but he’s going to find someone else to fuck. All the while, fat tears are falling down his cheeks.

-If you don’t go after him, the next time you see him he’s Buggy the Genius Jester, any sign of your Buggy is locked away, deeper then ever before. He’s built those walls double the height they had been. Spending all his time on the guild ship being abused by his two colleagues, because that’s what he thinks he deserves.

[cowboy-robooty]

Okay. listen to me. sit down, boy. If you read this youre reading the whole mf thing because i will sound crazy for half of it and then itll all tie together alright. Listen, this is my explanation of the switzerland's crush on germany allegations. This all started because of that one scene where Austria was all like "I guess Germany's asshole isn't all that cozy" and Switzerland just blushed and couldn't say anything else. I have taken cell samples from this clip and under electron microscopy, found that there is a whole extra chapter in the hetalia bible to be found here. So we all know about Switzerland's weird feelings about his and austria's past friendship. It is a whole other thing that I won't get into and also don't feel 1000% confident on yet, but currently personally see it as switzerland desiring friendship again and Maybe it is gay. Not 100% sure, but it's possible (for some reason my gut instinct says no though). Anyways, I think switzerland has a subconcious crush on germany. Germany's entire thing is that he is objectively one of, if not THE most reasonable nations. He is unironically a very good guy and that's why its comical that everybody fucking hates him. Switzerland's entire deal is that he's INSANELY NORMAL and because of that I think it would be really funny if he had a crush on Germany because it's like... well a normal person would probabaly like him the most irl since Germany's the most reliable and least insane. But see this crush is subconcious because switzerland does not hang out with germany ever because the guy surrounds himself with pyschopaths (everyone else). They just don't interact outside of trading only because their lifestyles dont mix and because of that, the seed of switzerlands crush on germany never can sprout. It's currently planted in nitrogen deficient soil found within the Sahara desert. This crush is still real and true though ok, it just never will become something that switzerland is aware of because he doesnt think about gay shit on his free time and never chills with germany enough to get a boner. But I think like if Germany and switzerland were trapped in Alcatraz for 30 years there is like a 20-40% chance switzerlands crush would finally have the resources it needs to blossom. Thats the only way it could work though. Unless those conditions are met, switzerland will continue to hold a subconcious crush on germany that makes him able to stay hard when he accidentally has a fleeting thought about the guy while trying to jerk off, but isn't something that is recognized enough to make him able to seek out germany because the wall of pyschopaths he hangs out with is too much to deal with.

[mayxo-hxh]

okay 2 questions....

do you think its more likely that illumi kills hisoka or hisoka kills illumi and how do you think it will go down?

what would you WANT to happen with one of their actual deaths?

You're not really going to like my answer here because it completely negates both questions.

I don't think either of them will die or kill each other.

I think it's natural to think so considering the current setting of the arc and what was revealed and their characters, but how I see it, their relationship has proven to be very nonsituational. As in, they aren't really hanging out and helping each other just because they happen to need each other here and there. They hang out and help each other because they unironically see each other as friends.

Illumi had no reason to help Hisoka out in the hunter exam, yet he did anyways. And they stayed together most of the time. Illumi had no reason to help Hisoka out during the yorknew dilemma, yet he did anyways. It's not even in his area of work to just disguise as people for a few hours before leaving. He's an assassin. Hisoka didn't have to help Illumi out during the election arc, Illumi was more than capable of finishing this entire mission alone. And yet he did anyways.

Goes without saying that Hisoka constantly calls Illumi his friend behind his back and also did so in front of him, and Illumi made no move to correct him.

So I can't really imagine, with all this said and done, that they'd actually have a reason to hunt and kill each other on the black whale. I understand the doubts with the stuff Illumi said in their marriage chapter but im still much more inclined to believe theyre working together against the troupe, as that would make much more sense. They've done nothing but work together against everyone in the entire anime and both Illumi and Kalluto worked against the troupe with Hisoka in yorknew after all.

I also feel like this is a general Hisoka misconception but-- Hisoka doesn't want to die. I feel like people think he hired Illumi to "hunt him down" because he wants Illumi to actually kill him and I have to disagree. Yes, it does speak volumes about what Hisoka thinks of Illumi, as in he truly is capable of killing him because theyre equals. But does Hisoka actually want Illumi to kill him right now? Negative.

Some people even say Hisoka has always wanted to go out in a huge fight or whatever-- I genuinely have no idea where tf they get that from lol. Hisoka brought himself back to life for a reason. He wants to live. He never planned on dying against Chrollo. He never ever plans on dying against people he fights. If Illumi and Hisoka were to ever truly fight, Hisoka would never let Illumi kill him without giving it his all. He WILL fight for his life.

And the same goes for Illumi. Illumi doesn't want to die and has no reason to want to actually die by Hisoka's hand. He has duties and responsibilities as a Zoldyck eldest and he's not going to throw it away in the name of... twisted love? lol

And I think lots of people find all of this hard to believe because theyre very used to villains getting bad endings or getting "what they deserve" in anime which is completely fair but let me, no, ALLOW ME to point you to one of my favorite villain groups in hxh that had a good ending despite being complete pieces of shit that would've deserved worse than death.

Genthru and the bomber team.

Genuine shitty people that scammed lied massacred people. They only cared about each other a lot but saw everyone else around them as lower than useless scum. They would've deserved to be left for dead. And yet, what happened? They were healed and they lived. They went on with their lives. Togashi could've very much made Gon just kill genthru to show how powerful he is and his sense of justice blablabla but that just isn't what the anime is about. Everyone in hxh is morally grey. At the end of the day Gon, Killua, and Bisky just wanted the cards from genthru and his friends and moved on.

A lot of people fail to realize this when it also comes to Hisoka and Illumi. They can just get a good ending like that. Do they deserve it? No. Does it matter whether they deserve it or not? Nope! This is hunter x hunter. And as far as I see it, its an anime about the power of platonic and romantic love. And Hisoillu are a specific type of love that is going to get a happy ending despite not even remotely deserving it. We got the meruem and komugi sad love ending. And we're getting the gay version of it except theyre unredeemable and horrible and they still get to be happy. Those are my thoughts.

Also in general I just genuinely cannot see Togashi continuing the anime without his favorite babygirl Hisoka being alive. Like even when he killed him off he revived him like 2 pages later in the same chapter he can't stand the idea of even letting his death marinate for a single chapter lmfaoooooooooo

[lostbetweenvampiresandmusic]

Changes chapter 24

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It had been three days since Star had run from her home, taking her little brother along with her. She'd left in a rush, not wanting to alarm the people inside. No bags were packed, and no things were taken - they just left with the clothes on their back. Star sighed as she looked at her reflection in the broken mirror of the motelroom she'd broken into. Laddie was fast asleep, snoring loudly.

She tucked him in, making sure he was comfortable before quietly leaving the room. She had to go back. She had to go and get her mom and get answers. How could her grandfather be doing something so horrible that his own daughter was terrified of what he could do to his own grandchildren?

Star quickly walked across the parking lot towards the busy road. Even now, in the middle of the night, cars sped past. She stuck her hand out, standing underneath a streetlight, hoping someone would see her.

She stood there for a while. Cars rushed past her, no one bothering to stop. Only when it began to rain, and she was completely soaked, did an old rusty red car stop. A woman in her late thirties sat behind the steering wheel.

"Are you alright?"

"I need to get to my mom!" Star called out over the heavy rumbling of rain.

"Get in!" The woman popped the door open. "She must be worried sick! What are you doing out here in this weather?"

Star got in and shut the door, shivering slightly. "I got lost on my way home, I lost my wallet, and I've been trying to hitch a ride with someone for the past three hours, but no one stopped."

"Oh dear," the woman looked shocked, not noticing the lies Star just told her. "Well, I am glad I stopped for you, dear. I'm Lucy, by the way. Where do you need to go?"

"Star, and thank you, really." She smiled, directing the woman down the road, leading her all the way to COL.

As the car came to a halt, Star quickly stepped out, thanking Lucy as she did so. Before the kind woman could say anything in return, Star had taken off, running into the woods. She just hoped no one would see her. No guard would spot her and drag her back inside. She needed to get in and out unnoticed, making sure she could take her mom with her and-

She fell backwards as she ran into someone, a large man with angry yellow eyes glaring at her.

"Shit, who are you?!"

"Who am I? What are you doing here? This place is bad news."

"As if I don't know that," Star got up, wiping the dirt from her skirt. "My mom's in there. I need to get her out."

"You know a way in?"

The girl nodded. Max grinned. Ever since the boys had left to go inside, he hadn't been able to contact any of them. David and Dwayne were God knows where, Max really had no clue, and Marko and Paul nad disappeared into the building. Ever since that happened, he had lost the feeling of being controlled by someone - which, on one hand, caused him to feel a little more at ease, but on the other hand worried him. The lack of control on him meant - most likely - that that control was exercised on someone else.

"I'm Max. They got my daughter in there and my sons. I'll make you a deal," he looked at the girl, glad to see she was open to his proposal. "I'll help you get your mom out if you help me find my kids."

Star thought about it for a moment, looking at him. "Why would I do that?"

"Because, dear," Max' face changed shape, becoming more batlike, "I am the muscle you need to get past the guards."

Star nodded, thinking to herself, not allowing herself to get freaked out by the man in front of her. She needed to fix this, and she could freak out later, when it was more convenient. "Alright. But we get my mom out first."

"We get them all out in order of who we come across first." Max said, a finality in his tone making it clear to Star that there was no point in arguing.

Lucien sighed disappointedly as he saw Julie. Her dazed expression, her lack of fear or emotional recoil - it saddened him. He enjoyed his games, and when a participant didn't want to play anymore, it was simply time to clear the playing field.

"Juliebug, " he crouched down in front of her, forcing her to look at him, "I really don't get why you're so afraid. After all, I never hurt you. Doctor Gregory did. Not me."

Julie glared at him, trying to look away, but his hold on her chin got only stronger. She winced in pain as she felt the bone protest against the force practiced upon it.

"No, I only ever brought you sweet release. I brought you life," he grinned, showing his fangs, "I brought you a family."

Julie pushed him away. No. He did not give her life. He did not give her a family. He fed her lies, he messed with her minds and memories, and he ruined what was supposed to be a wonderful human life. She got up, taking in a deep breath as she tried to steady herself. This was it. She needed to concentrate.

"Ah!" Lucien laughed, getting up himself as well. "I hoped you'd be willing to fight more."

Julie didn't bother to listen to him, instead attacking the second he moved up from the ground. It was easy to get him off balance, to pin him on the ground. She pinned him down. He trashed against her, hands pushing against her chest, her throat, her face - but Julie didn't let go. She pushed back. When a hand wrapped around her neck, she gasped for air. She snarled at him. She lashed out, her long, sharp vampire nails digging deep into his eyesocket. Lucien screamed, clutching his eye. Julie slashed again, opening up his wrist. Again. Opening up his chest. Once, twice.

She was covered in blood, covered in sweat and tears, but Lucien didn't give up. He didn't back down. When she looked away for a mere second, distracted by a loud thump above her, she was thrown across the room. Before she crashed against the wall, she redirected herself. Flying up into the air, she tried to jump Lucien, but he was on to her. He grabbed her foot, dragging her down and slamming her into the ground.

A silent scream escaped her as she felt her arm being ripped out of its socket as he lifted her up and slammed her down again. She gasped for air. Lucien grinned as he stood over her, lifting her up and slamming her against the wall.

Cracks formed in the concrete where she'd collided, pieces of rock falling down. Julie laid there between the ruble, struggling to get up. She leaned on her arms, one of them giving out the second she put any force on it.

"Are you done yet? You can't win from me, fledgling. I am your sire, I control -"

Lucien flew backwards. Julie landed on top of him, a large red brick in her hands as she pinned him down to the ground. Lucien laughed loudly, noticing how desperate the girl seemed. But then the brick hit his face, his damaged eye officially popping out. Then she hit again, his nose breaking. Again.

Again.

Again.

And again.

David silently cursed to himself as he realised he had lost sight of the van. He and Dwayne had promised her that they'd be there for her every step of the way, but now? As quickly as they could, they drove through the streets, making their way down the highway. They sped past cars, moving left and right to avoid crashing into them.

"We'll get there in time!" Dwayne called out. He was a couple of feet behind David.

"We better!" David sped up even more, moving off the freeway as he saw a sign stating Berkeley was close by. Dwayne quickly followed. They dropped their bikes in the woods near the main street, deciding to fly the rest of the way. It would be faster, and the chances of them being seen would be minimalized.

Quickly, they flew through the night, seeing a building rise at the horizon. It was the same building Max had described to them hours before, the same building Julie was held at.

Dwayne was the first to land, landing on the edge of the roof. "She's here," he said, sighing with worry. "Max is still outside, but the others are inside as well."

"Max was supposed to go in," David hissed, annoyance lacing his voice. "Motherfucker."

"Let's make sure we find Julie first. Afterwards we can deal with Max."

They walked across the roof, David easily ripping the metal door of the roof entrance of its hinges. Quietly, the two men stepped inside, swiftly walking down the stairs, making sure they didn't make a single sound. They opened the door at the end of the stairs, ending up in a dark, carpeted hallway.

David was about to say something when they heard a man's laughter. They looked at each other without saying another word.

They flew down the hallway, crashing into the room where they'd heard the man. David and Dwayne looked up, seeing the same man whose head they'd seen in that box days before. Seeing him laugh as his face was being smashed to pieces by Julie, who was crying tears of anger as she smashed the brick in her hands down and down again on his face. Pieces of blood, skin, eye and brain stuck to it, creating a sickening noise as she pulled the rock away only to bring it down again with such force that the remainders of the skull scattered to pieces.

Next chapter > available on September 29th

[l1li4n]

lestappen top 100 tags on ao3. i know that's my parents <3

[kingkatsuki]

Yeah short skirts and crop tops are sexy— but there’s just something about a man that finds you so attractive wearing clothes that shouldn’t be considered typically sexual. Like baggy sweats or his old, worn shirt.

Those plain, boring outfits that aren’t planned and are just thrown together for comfort and practicality that have his dick throbbing for you as he imagines bending you over the nearest surface.

[cluescorner]

I cannot imagine being a Damian stan right now. You've got both Zdarsky's bullshit (where he clearly doesn't give a shit about your boy) and The Boy Wonder (where Juni Ba clearly gives so many shits about your boy) coming out on the same day. The whiplash must be insane. I hope y'all get some nice warm soup for your efforts jfc

[anxiously-sidequesting]

anyways seeing Duncan still with the Schism at the end left me like ☹️

[eisthenameofme]

love when it gets to the point of The Discourse where i feel the need to key word search otherwise chill people's blogs for rampant bigotry before following them. Like this isn't exactly what happened with 'ace discourse'

[iceeericeee]

I wonder how many tags i can add on to this

[triglycercule]

i am severely upset at the sexyman polls for this year. yeah its absolutely because im biased and not a single one of the mtt won. but killer vs error is still going on you say!!! NO,,,,, killer's lost,,,,, its 70 error 30 killerISH so yeah,,,,, none of the mtt MADE!!!! IT!!!! and with the boom in killer content these past few months i wasSO FUCKING SURE that he'd like AT LEAST get higher up. nope. because of ERROR. listen i like him. he was my og bias when i first joined this fandom. i was an error fanatic. but bro,,,,, bro,,,,,,,,, killer,,,,, lost,,,,,, AND FUCKING HORROR AND DUST LOST TOO!!!! LIKE WHAY. WHAT. PUTTING HORROT AGAINST ERROR AND DUST AGAINST CROSS!!!! THEYRE LITERALLY BOTH THE TWO GUYS THAT (1/2 of them) WON LAAT YEAR!!!! OF COURSE THEYRE GONNA BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF THE MTT!!!!! this is very upseting im really sad imMAD. but no point in being a sore loser.... mtt won in my HEART 🧡

dust laughing at both horror and killer for getting the shit beaten out of them by error and then they bring up the fact that he lost to CROSS. this is the second time someone in the mtt lost to cross (theyre all making out in the loser's room) (mtt poly real btw)

[volfoss]

It's really funny comparing the sims 4 retail experience to the sims 2 retail experience because the sims 2 has it beat easily