#because of the lesbian drama? WOW
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Y'all. Probably the most UNIVERSALLY ACCEPTED criticism against grrm is the abundance of gratuitous extreme sexual violence against women in asoiaf. GoT doubled down on that and is endlessly criticized for that. On the ONE (1) INSTANCE where sexual violence was NOT part of a female character's arc in grrm's work, HotD decided to introduce it as a means of giving "nuance" to a story and making a character more sympathetic. And now not only is this not considered a sexist narrative but on top of that you call this an inspired twist ffs I'm gonna eat my hair
#like there is no way to be so unserious guys#just decide#i can't believe we have been trashing GoT for centuries now for the exact same thing we are appreciating in HotD right now#'HotD is different' really? Where?#because of the lesbian drama? WOW#Is it based on shock value? yeah#does it have gratuitous violence? yeah#does it have MORE gratuitous violence than the author? YEAH#does it use rape as a means of sympathizing with a character like in Show!Sansa's case#which was THEN considered Oh So Problematic for some reason?#YEAH#asoiaf#fire and blood#anti hotd#aspa rambles#forever mad
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rewatching this deeply unserious scene again and I just LOVE it so much... she got this dying immortal a coffin for his birthday (none of those words should logically be next to each other) and he has the state of mind to take prime corpse position and then COMPLAIN about it's capacity and how it's a waste of resources...
this was my favourite yandan yingyuan era... no one was missing a half of their heart, no debt larger than life, yingyuan was like 500 times more drama queen sassmax than usual, cheng yi is throwing up blood, no stupid evil sister plotline... it was great
#if my best friends dont get me one of these for my bday they are fakes#immortal samsara#this was the drama that made me watch mlc#because they had him play like 3 different people and i was like... wow i havent had enough lets watch more#grew a lesbian attachment on him#ying yuan#yan dan
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Let’s be honest here, if James and Sirius were girls (into eachother or not) they would be known as the “lesbians” around school.
As someone who went through highschool as a girl having a very close friendship with a girl (and let’s face it, yes I was desperately in love with her and no it didn’t end well, but that’s bedside the point because these rumours went around before I fell for her) we were Always asked if we were dating and when we denied it people didn’t believe us. And if people didn’t think we were dating they thought we wanted to date, and yeah it was primarily guys thinking that which I’m not even gonna get into because that’s a whole sexist fucking gross thing there, but still!
You can’t tell me, if you’re like gen z or in a generation where queerness is known through your highschool and like not the worse thing in the world, that you didn’t have a set of girl best friends that everyone thought were in a queer relationship.
I happened to be in like, almost all the “lesbian” rumoured relationships at my school because, after the first one, I shaved my head and became the school dyke and then any close female friend I had meant I had to be in love with them and if they seemed smiley around me back it was assumed we were dating.
But like, James and Sirius were That Close, and if they were girls, they Would be The Lesbians. If they were just best friends, everyone would assume they were lesbians. If they were secretly in love with eachother and never said anything until it was too late, everyone would assume they were lesbians. If they were dating and just didn’t tell anyone, everyone would assume they were lesbians. If they were dating and did come out and tell people, no one would be surprised.
I think there’s something special about that. And I know from personal experience being known as the lesbian couple of the school even when you’re not isn’t the greatest, but like as someone who’s experienced that and also experienced it in a more positive way (where people were just supportive and wanted us to date because they genuinely thought we’d be good together and we liked eachother) it’s just something that’s bound to happen.
Apparently you can’t have two girls that close to eachother that aren’t your typical “straight laced “normal” girls” and have them not be cast as the school lesbians.
James was a quidditch captain nerdy smartarse, and Sirius is an alternative black sheep with severe mummy issues. They’re gonna be the lesbians.
And I adore that.
#someone write me a fic about it#and make them kiss and be in love#ALSO no hate to ‘normal’ girls obviously. it’s just there were a lot of girls in my highschool with close female relationships similar to my#own and they were never cast as lesbians because they fit into the typical norm of girl that guys liked. you know they were very feminine#and would hem their dresses to be shorter and shave their legs and what not. I’m talking in the earlier years of highschool too. and they’d#just be very typically feminine and often be involved in boy drama and blah blah blah. where as me and my friends cast in this category were#often seen as weird. or at least I was. we weren’t seen as pretty in the way they were and often had hairy legs still or came to school#without makeup. we were kinda nerdy or had strange humour and less of a fashion sense.#mostly we were just a little bit different. especially me. and so yeah we got casted as the lesbians. especially me because I was typically#undesirable to those mysoginistic sexist teenage boys 👍👍👍#wow I did not mean for this to turn into a little rant#it was just a midnight thought that kinda made me laugh that I could relate too. wow. go to sleep jay#jay talks#prongsfoot#James potter#sirius black#James x sirius#marauders#sapphic prongsfoot#lesbian prongsfoot#lesbian James#lesbian sirius
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5/24
Katie moodboard <3
Learning that Katie made her own clothes; along with Sadie’s is super cute <3
#wow i can’t believe freshtv made the first lesbian qpr ever <3 /hj#fandom#yes I’m using that tag again because it’s true again#td katie#total drama#my moodboards#moodboard#edit#my thoughts
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ive been tossing around my scp oc like a stressball and, like, she was originally supposed to be ur average power-hungry coworker but on the scale of like. REALLY wants to be a manager in the office rather than like. magic-stuff. but now that I'm thinking about it I think as time goes on she does something horrible because she's genre aware just enough to know what makes a main character around here and she wants it badly. I'm unsure what magic she afflicts herself with because it doesn't really matter
I'm also fond of her companion. he's a normal guy . average security guard. he used to work in a federal prison and had a third-life ciris and decided that this would be something more humane. it isn't. they're friends of circumstance because they started at the same time and, well, they were both as good as anyone else to talk to. he is intrigued by her antics until he is Not Amused Anymore you're going to get Shot and you're the only funny one in this place you can't leave me here.
#I looked away and she developed a prsonality dsorder . sad < PERSON WITH DISORDER OKAY BE NORMAL#A lesbian and an ostensibly straight man can be in a QPR. They won't tell you this#(He's actually aroace But he has a job he doesn't really care about all that right now /Ref)#She does get relationship dramas. Her story kind of starts w/ her getting broken up with because her new job is like#Consuming her. And she's kind of obsessed with it. And kind of obsessed w like moving up in the world there#And her fiancee is like?? AT THE SHADY GOVERNMENT OPERATION? THE SHADY GOVERNMENT RESEARCH? You cannot be serious .#esp since her job is mainly an anmestics tech at the beginning and if she Did share her Secret Job :3c shes like. Wow! That's awful. Hello?#But she's sooo fine. She's just going to go harder on trying to move up in the job. A wedding would get in the way of the grind . Duh#She's silley to me. Her name is Evie and whenever she approaches her buddy he hears world is mine play faintly in the background#He does not have a name yet. Something generic but he gets called his surname at work.#I'm feeling Mark. But I already have a Mark. Or two probs#Mark (tentative) has been divorced once. He doesn't really know who he is or what he wants. A paycheque. Mostly a paycheque.#He thought this would be a chiller job that would make him feel less bad about existence. He feels worse in fact.
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TELL ME ABOUT THE MEN!!!!!!
HELLO!!!
GLADLY :DD
THE MEN. :)
They’re called shoot from the hip (sfth) and are @shootimpro on youtube, tiktok, instagram, facebook, x/twitter, as well as on linktree, patreon and ko-fi.
They’re London based but have done shows outside london like in Scotland (Edinburgh Fringe) and even to Spain. They want to hopefully go to other countries in the future too!!
From left to right they’re Sam, Tom, AJ and Luke :)))
(this will probably be LONG so putting a read more lol)
Ok so they do improvised comedy and their shows have two halves (generally with a break in the middle) they play lots of short drama games in the first half and then improvise 20-30 minute (on average) plays in the second half, sometimes with another game at the end.
The plays are so much fun (they’ve got 38 of them up on youtube so far!!) and they’ve also released two full specials (full shows) which you can find on their channel :)
(just a note that for a few of the older ones (apart from the first one) they were filming on an iphone and just projecting their voices, the the audio and image quality can be hard to deal with)
they have SO MUCH CONTENT because during covid they did zoom-style improv shows with eachother and you can watch them as a patreon
they also have SO MANY VIDEOS that are just the regular public ones!!!! They upload short ones of the games and some 5-10min ones of the games too, as well as the long forms (plays)
Now some info about the guys :D
Samuel Thomas Russell-Holmes:
Birthday 21st July 1989 (35)
Married this year and expecting a baby!!! :)
wears a red flannel a LOT (less recently, but still a LOT, it’s his Thing)
he says some very risky things sometimes but also has the audacity to look shocked when the others do it lol
Fav colour is green
he’s 5”10
brown eyes
currently producing a radio show for the bbc called wing it (available in December!)
if he were a Disney Princess he said he’d be Rapunzel
VERY GOOD AT ANIMAL (specifically goat/sheep) NOISES
kisses Luke a lot lol (kisses all of them a lot, but specifically Luke- I counted like the madman that I am lol)
great at talking in Spanish gibberish, often paired with opening his shirt buttons
loves fantasy things
wrote an audiobook called “Evergreen”
his mother and grandfather are/were successful actors
Has a drama degree
Low spice tolerance
has eaten raw egg live on camera
can be a tad egotistical but we love him
Thomas Mayo-Woodman/Hodgson-Mayo:
HES SO TALL (this man is almost 2m tall- he’s 6”5.5 :0)
brown eyes
his birthday is 10th July 1989 (35)
Married to a drag king (@pipdream on insta, tiktok, youtube, ect.) who’s pronouns are they/them
Wrote a graphic novel (it’s called Future it’s about space lesbians)
literally one of the sweetest and kindest souls on this planet I’ve never met him but every time he says anything it’s like WOW OK YOURE SO NICE AND KIND AND WONDERFUL (everything I’ve heard from people who’ve met him is SO NICE)
SO GOOD AT IMPROVISING (specifically Shakespearian-style) MONOLOGUES
his favourite colour is red
has two english degrees (very good with grammar and words)
has adhd
makes a garbled choking noise very well (you have to hear it to get what I mean I guess lol)
has eaten a teabag live on camera
He’s the “dad” of the group
Very hard to make him laugh on stage (but he’s been laughing more, recently!!) and each one is treasured
so kind did I mention he is kind
lovingly called a squid or squidboi by the fandom because of one time he like stuck his hands in his sleeves and was like “I’m a squid”
does a lot of admin work for sfth and handles the finances (at least he did, they might have someone for that now I’m not sure) and takes care of the patreon
Alexander Thomas Jeremy (AJ):
Birthday on 4th November 1991 (32)
CONFUSION KING /aff (he gets confused easily but we love him for it)
He’s bald and gets made fun of for it RELENTLESSLY (again, lovingly)
Absolutely ANGELIC singing voice
Blue eyes
born in Manchester(UK) but grew up in France (fluent in French)
makes movies/short films on youtube!! He’s working on a new one now and you can find them @atjeremy on youtube (that’s also his insta and you can see stuff about his films there too!)
does a lot of the editing for sfth and has a lot of input into which longforms to upload apparently (all of them decide tho I think)
he’s such a himbo (/aff)
fav colour is blue
He’s 6 foot tall
On their covid livestreams would always forget to get costuming ready
his rapping is BEAUTIFUL (words that barely rhyme at all and make NO sense 😌)
can deliver GREAT one liners
so good at playing children it’s crazy
can do magnificent cartwheels and loves to jump on the others with no warning
lots of muscles but lost an arm wrestle against Tom
Thinks he can’t do an Irish accent but I think it’s pretty good
also has a drama degree
Luke Christopher Manning
Birthday is the 23rd October 1989 (currently 34 about to be 35)
Hazel eyes
hes not short but he’s the short-EST, 5”7.5
gets made fun of for his height a LOT (lovingly!!)
SO good at accents
so good at playing women
also so good at playing children
such a good actor overall
says THE MOST UNHINGED THINGS
people think he’s innocent (somehow) but he’s SO unhinged
took his pants off live on stage (wearing underwear but still lol) (AND it’s on youtube hahaha)
lives in Spain with his long term girlfriend (fluent in Spanish)
so much attitude in such a small guy (/aff)
often compared to Macaulay Caulkin looks-wise
plays bass guitar in a band
Teaches acting (to kids??) in Spain
also has adhd
also has a drama degree
His favourite film is back to the future I believe
So confident in himself (this is a very good thing)
people say he “doesn’t age” and looks really young but I personally think he does look his age
sometimes called “Luke Womanning” as a play on his last name because of how amazing all his female characters are
They’re all really close friends and met at uni and started doing improv around 13 years ago together! Started gaining popularity 2022 and are gaining more and more fans every day!
Um. Whoops I wrote a lot lol. (It totally hasn’t been an hour of me just writing this hahahaha)
anyway I love them so much :)))) (as you can probably tell)
anyway!
THANK YOU SO MUCH ANON THIS ASK MEANS SO MUCH TO ME :DDDDD
#shoot from the hip#Sfth asks#Shootimpro#thank you for the ask!#AAAAAAAA :)))))))#This is so nice#theres probably more I could say but tumblr almost killed this post three times cause it couldn’t handle the sheer power of my autism lol#so I’ll leave it be for now :)#Thank you so much anon#sfthposting#sam russell#tom mayo#alexander jeremy#luke manning#:))))))#long post
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there's a lot of reasons more people aren't into yuri that are troubling to consider, but equally, I genuinely think it cannot be understated how much of it comes down to most yuri being boring as hell. Like truly. I've been reading the front page of Dynasty Scans like it was the newspaper for 15 years I am not exaggerating I can show you the download file data 15 years.
You know what the complaint about yuri by yuri readers was back in 2009?
"wow that really was just 5 volumes of them blushing at each other and then they don't even kiss"
You know what the complaint about yuri by yuri readers is today in 2023?
"wow that really was just 5 volumes of them blushing at each other and then they don't even kiss"
Don't get me wrong, Yuri has grown a LOT in that time, to the point that most people today wouldn't even understand a Maria-sama reference if it were dropped in front of them (thank God). It's expanded and evolved to encompass more stories about adult women, wider varieties of scenarios, a greater acknowledgement of real life lesbianism, and is more comfortable showing girls kissing with tongue and having sex.
Yuri Manga is maybe the best is it's ever been, and it's also getting the widest readership it's ever had in the English speaking world. The titles we carry at work are always on back order with long queues, and, when I've asked them, most weebs of all gender or sexualities report keeping up with at least a few Yuri series.
At large though? Most of it is still really boring. That's not a bad thing necessarily. I like it because it goes down easy. For the most part any series you pick is gonna be pretty chill. Even shit from Sal Jiang which is PRETTY EDGY for yuri is a pretty breezy read. More serious ones like How Do We Relationship? cover some pretty real subjects about how intimacy is actually quite difficult even when both of you love each other, but it's not like... Exciting. Yuri isn't where you go to pump your fist or get perched on the edge of your seat.
So when the comparison is made to yaoi, well, I mean, have you READ any yaoi? Even in some of the more restrained titles those boys are likely to be sucking and fucking balls and all within the first volume or two. There's gonna be drama, intrigue, shit is gonna get messy, passions are gonna get heated, clothes are gonna be ripped off, people are gonna get sold to One Direction, it's stuff you can sit down with a bowl of popcorn with you know? Stuff you can message your friend and gush Hey Can You BELIEVE? A lot of it is pretty trashy, but that's the appeal. The generic state of yaoi is torrid and exciting and sexy. Ultimately, as a species many of us like to see pretty people fuck. In yaoi you'll get that. In yuri you won't. Nothing wrong with that, but it is gonna be a major contributing factor to their relative popularity.
It's also worth making the comparison to hetero romance manga, which has undergone a renaissance of it's own in recent years. There's now a whole meta around crafting a handful of mean shitty grouchy dysfunctional bully women and flinging them at the protagonist of the day who, unlike in years past, may actually have a face and personality. Most of these are also very trashy and truly scrape the bottom of the bucket in terms of writing.
AND YET?
I would bet money on the fact that you'll have heard of these women and probably even have a good idea what they're like without ever having touched a page of their manga.
I'm sorry but the straights are whipping donuts around the yuri girls in terms of delivering a wide variety of weird compelling fucked up women. How many yuri leading ladies by comparison can you point to as standout recognizable characters even divorced from their story? There's definitely a few, but not many. I'm not talking quality or depth of writing, I'm talking straight up pure recognizability. There are many beautifully written women in yuri, now more than ever. I can't think of many who'd like, get a figure made or have their face splashed on merch, though.
I don't really have a conclusion here. I love Yuri a lot, but at the end of the day this is just kinda the state of things right now.
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Round 5 - Catholic Character Tournament
Propaganda below ⬇️
Sister Michael
She drives a DeLorean. She does judo on Fridays. She likes a good statue and despises the French. Her full nun name is Sister George Michael, after the guy from Wham!. She is the fiercest nun you’ll ever come across and, if you’re attending Lady Immaculate College, she’s the woman in charge. So whatever you do, if you’re feeling anxious or worried or just need a chat: don’t come crying to her.
joined the nunnery for the free accommodation?
she does love a good statue it has to be said
She is the headmistress of a catholic school <3
sister michael so reminds me of the nuns who taught me. they're tough and sometimes a little harsher than a woman who dedicated her life to god should be but they're also wonderful people. i had a nun teacher who was 60 years old and would do handstands. another nun (also in her 60s) told me god was nonbinary. another was really mean and made me cry. (so did the handstand nun.) while the catholic girls school is The Catholic Experience, the school wouldn't have been the same for me or the derry girls without at least one nun who seemed to have sprung up out of the ground fully formed, ageless.
Kurt Wagner/Nightcrawler Propaganda:
good lord where do i start. in the animated series he converts logan to catholisism and then fucks off basically thats the main thing he did there. i think one time they tried to make him a demon to explain how he looked but everyone hated that. he sold his soul one time to help his friends out after he died. he and logan have a weird little gay thing. he was a priest one time but he was made a priest by a fake bishop from a religion that hates mutants iirc so he just wasnt a priest. like 3 people have written him in a way i like and one of those is my friend just talking about how they view him.
wow marvel loves making catholic characters dress/look like demons
Kurt is a mutant who was born to mystique who looks a LOT like a devil (technically is half one but that cannon truth isn’t real go back to bed), his mother dropped him off a cliff when he was born and he was picked up by a Romani group/circus (fuck old comics man) however he then narrowly escaped being sold to a freak show and found himself in a small German town. There he met a kind priest, who showed him God, and he quickly grew attached to the idea- However, it wasn’t long before people began labeling him a demon and soon the whole town was against him with pitchforks and fire. Cornered and injured, Kurt thought this might be the end for him- maybe he would see heaven so long after finding it- but he was then saved by Charles Xavier who invited him to the X-Men. AND ITS BEEN SO MANY YEARS AND HE HAS BEEN THROUGH SO MUCH THERE. SO MUCH. SO GOD DAMN MUCH. BUT THE MOST AAAA THING TO ME CONCERNING HIS FAITH HE WHEN HE LITERALLY DIED AND WENT TO HEAVEN BUT THEN BECAUSE OF DRAMA WITH HIS FATHER HAD TO BRING HIS FRIENDS IN WITH HIM FROM THE BEYOND. THEN WITH ALOT OF TROUBLE THEY FOUGHT HIS FATHER AND THE ONLY WAY KURT SAW TO STOP HIM WAS IN A MOVE THAT STRIPPED THEM BOTH OF THEIR SOULS AND PUT THEM BACK ON EARTH. SO KURT CANONICALLY HAS NOW LOST HIS ABILITY FOR ETERNAL PEACE, LOST HIS VERY SOUL, TO SAVE PEOPLE- AND ALSO TOLD NO ONE NOT EVEN HIS GAY LOVER WOLVERINE.
Nightcrawler is a mutant vigilante who looks like a classical demon. He can’t even go to church without people panicking and trying to exorcize him. Despite it all, he’s so full of faith and hope and compassion, and he wants to believe the best of everyone. Also, he’s bffs with an extremely angry Jewish sword lesbian. That has nothing to do with anything, but it’s important to me that you all know that.
What if you were a devout christian and literally looked like the devil? He nearly became the pope, which was a plot by some supervillains that also involved faking a rapture? There is nothing like comics I swear to god.
A catholic who is half demon I don’t think I can better explain a struggle than that. But his character is so relatable to people who feel unwelcome with their congregation because of something that is a part of them but still feeling a connection to the faith. Kurt actively engaged in his faith and shares how his faith helps him through all the things he has faced in life and how he found a home with those of the church who leave the judging to God.
so they made kurt a priest briefly before deciding to retcon it, resulting in nightcrawler actually being part of a plan by villains to promote him to pope then reveal to the world that the pope is a demon. wild.
I have a side blog and a tattoo about him and i really really want him to win
Wisecracking devil-appearing devout Catholic with the Best superpower (teleportation)? HECK YES
German Catholic circus acrobat who looks like a demon & can teleport through a hellish alternate dimension with a puff of sulfur. Character of all time.
hes catholic and his dad is the devil. what could be funnier than that. also hes my silly little guy.
Nightcrawler is the world’s most fun catholic priest. I first was introduced to this kindhearted teleporting acrobat while he saved a boat full of stowaway refugees from inter dimensional pirates with swashbuckling gusto!
#cct polls#tumblr tournament#tumblr bracket#tumblr polls#polls#kurt wagner#x men#nightcrawler#marvel#xmen#x men comics#marvel x men#r5#the derry girls#derry girls#sister michael
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JAUNE: Hello Mercury!
JAUNE: My beloathed
MERCURY: Beloved...?
JAUNE: No, its like... loathe is the opposite of love and it also sounds like love but I don't love or like you because no one likes you-
JAUNE: I'm not explaining this to you actually.
JAUNE: Some people get my humor because they're awesome.
JAUNE: And others are you.
WEISS: Hello Jaune.
JAUNE: HI WEISS!!
PYRRHA: So both of you work here?
NORA: I never expected someone like YOU to be in somewhere like... here.
WEISS: Well its for the... time being.
WEISS: Mostly because I can't access my money anymore because my dad cut me off...
WEISS:
WEISS: More importantly, Mercury is helping out on the drama program.
REN: Never took you for the theater nerd.
MERCURY: Well I am.
MERCURY: I guess...
JAUNE: Oooooooh...
MERCURY: Lean away from me Jaune.
JAUNE: Wow never knew you acted.
JAUNE: That's honestly quite cute...
JAUNE: Acting is a good talent. Some might say its a great talent. Maybe your acting abilities can help us on our blog.
JAUNE: Or for our special roleplays.
PYRRHA: The Huntsman stuff?
JAUNE: Shhhh... yes that. Maybe then Mercury can stop ogling and do something.
MERCURY: I don't "ogle", I study you. And I do that by daydreaming and blushing. It's my technique.
MERCURY: And besides why would I help you and your stupid blog and your stupid plots and schemes and-
WEISS: His jaunenanigans.
JAUNE: You'll love this Merc, trust me.
JAUNE: In factttt you can sit next to me while we blog.
JAUNE: We can bound over our shared interests of men.
MERCURY: I'M NOT GAY.
NORA: That's not very believable.
MERCURY: No matter how much weird "Arc Mind Control" you try putting on me. I'm straight as a...
MERCURY: As a...
NORA: A ruler?
REN: Like one of those broken ones with a little arc.
NORA: Yeah with an Arc. Winkkkk.
REN: Wink.
PYRRHA: I'm sorry Arc Mind Control?????
JAUNE: No, I can confirm, that's how my sister turned her wife into a lesbian.
MERCURY: SEE!!
JAUNE: Anyways...
JAUNE: Scoot over Pyrrha.
NORA: Scoot scoot scoot scoot!!!!
PYRRHA: Dear gods.
#rwby#ask jaune#team jnpr#jaune arc#nora valkyrie#pyrrha nikos#lie ren#weiss schnee#mercury black#// IM BACKKKK
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adult Van being your ex lover and trying to get you back - headcanons 𐙚
some detailed thoughts about the scenario of having dated her "casually" for a while until she broke it off bc it got too intense and romantic - only for her to beg for forgiveness after a while. this is narrative in structure, basically a timeline from the first date to where it ended up eventually <3
warnings: nsfw mentions (minors dni), a good amount of emotional lesbian dating drama.
how it all started:
you met on an app, nothing out of the ordinary, but the thing that was unusual, was the Van asked you to meet up after just one day of texting
with other people, she was often the type to leave them on read for a few days before eventually agreeing to a date, but with you she found herself smiling at all your texts right from the start, which was new for her, so just one day after you first texted, she straight up asked "hey would you wanna go out for dinner this weekend?".
your first date was at a nice yet underrated Italian place downtown that she wanted to show you, it was a dimly lit space that was romantic but not overly so and you felt at ease around each other right from the start - you were both insanely nervous the few hours before you met (she definitely felt very sick at one point) but the moment you hugged hello, it felt so natural that all nerves just fell off, replaced by the giddiness of sensing an instant attraction
the evening was lovely, from start to finish. Van made you laugh way more than you had expected, which delighted her immensely and only made her try even harder to win you over completely - she made you try her meal and insisted on you taking a few more bites when it was clear that you really liked it, she never broke eye contact, she leaned closer and touched your hand about an hour into the date when it was clear that you wanted her to - you talked about everything under the sun and lost track of time, sharing a desert and gazing at each other over the table with sparkling eyes, you making her flush whenever you complimented her or looked at her for too long - so by the time you were ready to leave you both felt a shared sense of disbelief like "wow.. this was so nice. I already like you so much."
she offered to drive you home when you told her that you had walked there and once you were parked in front of your house, you both kind of just sat there in silence, a bit nervous, the good kind, smiling to yourselves in the dark before you looked at each other and you told her "I had a really nice time. can we do this again sometime?", she nodded and leaned over to you and said "yes. please." a pause before she added "can I kiss you?", unsure if you would want her to after just one date but you didnt even answer, you just leaned in and gave her a deep, passionate kiss as a response, feeling her smile into it.
your next date was a few days later at a bar, around 9pm, because you had great chemistry and were clearly dying to get your hands on each other, but didnt just wanna make it a hook-up - so you spent about an hour getting tipsy, touching each other under the table, staring into each others eyes and saying overly sweet things like "you’re so pretty.." and "I thought about you a lot this week" before she finally caved and said "should we go back to my place?".
the main thing that made you both obsess over each other was the intimacy you shared. the first time you fucked, you were both out of breath and frantic with desire but it was heavenly - you giggled when you both almost tripped on the way up to her apartment and tore each others clothes off without much elegance, you spent a good amount of time just dry-humping and making out because you were so deeply into each other and really wanted to savor every part of it - moaning pathetically as you both took turns kissing each others necks while grinding and moving, growing unbearably needy and wet from it before you went down on her for the first time.
Van hadn’t told you this explicitly but the second she had her thighs around your head, you realized that your instinct about her had been right: she wanted to surrender. she wasn’t the kind of older woman who only dreamed of dominating her younger partner, she was the type to get most turned on from the idea of you ruining her, so, you used it to your full advantage: eating her out until she was a shaking mess, addicted to her taste, to her sounds, her sensitivity and reactiveness to your touch, and Van thought "yeah, I am fucked. she got me good. this is perfect."
she definitely returned the favor just as eagerly and took her time jerking you off, feeling how wet you’d gotten from eating her out, praising you and lapping it up and kissing and biting your thighs - which was just the beginning of a long night of you taking turns, losing track of time, tribbing and rubbing up against each other, taking little breaks to just kiss and caress each other and catch your breaths. you took a water break before you looked at her and said "do you wanna sit on my face..", which nearly made her choke on her own spit.
you ended the night with your face entirely covered in her juices, blissed out from the feeling of her using you like that, whining and moaning and uttering things like "fuck you feel so good.." while she held your head and rocked her hips against your mouth, already sore from the fucking before but not too sore to absolutely ride herself into oblivion on your tongue. you definitely needed her to do that again, and again and again...
eventually you both fell asleep naked and exhausted around 4 am and both woke up naturally around 10 the next morning. you both laid in bed for a few minutes, smiling almost a bit shyly at how desperate you’d been for each other, both of you turned on from the sight of little hickeys and love bites youd left on the others body - she made you coffee and lent you some of her clothes and asked if youd wanna come over again in the coming days - of course you did.
from then on, you saw each other more and more. sometimes you went on proper dates, like getting lunch and a coffee after or going for a walk and looking at some book stores or thrift shops together, a few times even driving out of the city a bit to see some pretty nature and get fresh air (maybe messing around in public a bit) but a good amount of the time you just came over to her place after school or work and spent the night together, relaxing together, chatting and drinking or watching a film before you inevitably ended up in her bed.
Van definitely liked you more than she said out loud. she did not go on any other dates after she met you, didn’t even talk to anyone else, she was completely focused on you. at first, she thought "oh this is fun, I have a hot girl that I can just call over and have fun with" but a few weeks into it, she realized just how far from casual it all was. she hadnt planned on it, she had gone onto the apps with the goal of finding a way to get off, not to fall in love, but... things were turning out a bit differently..
she started texting you throughout the day, asking you how you were, making sure you were fine, offering you rides whenever you had to be somewhere far from home or had to be picked up. she held you whenever you fell asleep in her bed and comforted you when you were going through something, she wiped your tears when you were embarrassed about crying in front of her, you confided in her and she often gave you little gifts to cheer you up - in general, she gave you way more than you asked for, she was sweet to a degree that shocked even herself.
she is old-fashioned so rather than texting too much, you often called each other, which turned into a sweet ritual: you having her on speaker when you cleaned your room or folded your laundry, her talking to you while making her coffee in the morning and saying "oh come on, you’ll do great" whenever you complained to her about a nerve-wrecking thing you had to master that day. her promising you "how about this, when you get done, text me, I will pick you up and we can go to your restaurant of choice to celebrate, okay?"
Van acted like your girlfriend, right from the start. she didn’t plan on it, it just happened because she liked you so much that none of her usual attempts at keeping her distance even registered to her: she forgot about them all together. you broke down her defenses without even trying and did it so gently that she had no clue, until she was already kind of in love. maybe not just kind of.
it only dawned on her how deep in she was when she started dreading the weeks where you spent more than a few days apart. it scared her, that feeling of "I need her. I need to see her. I miss her so bad." she had a full on crisis and told herself "I cant depend on someone like this. I just can’t."
she freaked herself out and imagined you leaving eventually, all of her old paranoid. avoidant thoughts came bubbling back up, so she spiraled and fucked it up.
how it ended:
about two months into it, after weeks and weeks of you sleeping over at her place, wearing her clothes, spending entire weekends together, you falling for each other and more each minute you were together, she called you over one afternoon and sat you down to talk.
you couldn’t believe it at first when she said "listen. I have really enjoyed this time with you.." because you were so startled by her sudden shift in tone. just a few days before, you had spent the whole night kissing and laughing and there she was, nervously tapping her foot as she tried to tell you it was over, or at least, on ice.
Van said some vague bullshit about "needing some distance" and "not being in a place where a relationship would work" and worst of all that you "deserved better than that". you couldn’t even cry then because it was so shocking - just the night before you had gushed to someone about how safe and held you felt with her -
she said something about seeing each other less, that she wouldn’t cut you off, but you refused let her have any access to you after saying all that - it seemed insulting to you, degrading even, after everything you’d done, you wouldn’t just be her hookup, her play-thing, without the romance you had shared up until then, so you just said "yeah no I can’t do this, I can’t" and walked out of her apartment before you might have thrown up or cried or collapsed or worse, trying to keep your dignity in tact, fleeing the scene.
Van tried to say something like "hey, stop, no I didn’t mean-" as you stormed out but it was too late, she had hurt you too deeply, had crushed your heart, so the moment you were gone, she fell into a self-hatred that was so dark and awful that she didnt open the store for three days after.
Van knew she fucked up BAD. she knew it was just her stupid old urge to push people away the second they had the ability to hurt her, but in the process she had been the cruel one, she had used her fear of vulnerability to make you deeply regret yours and it killed her. she definitely got drunk out of her mind that night to drown out the voices that told her "you didn’t deserve her anyway. she’s better off like this. you’re an awful fucking person. using a girl like that. you deserve to be alone. to die alone."
you were absolutely broken and wrecked to your core from the sudden break-up, you were shattered, so, when she sent you a text the next day saying "I am so sorry, I handled that so badly, can we talk again sometime?" you just said "no. leave me alone, Van. find someone else to fuck." and blocked her number after because you were so hurt in your pride.
you had opened up to her, in a way you hadn’t to anyone else before, you had given her your heart and soul, you had the most intimate sex of your life with her, you talked to her day and night, fell in love with her - the way she seemingly had for you - only for her to ruin it all for no reason other than vague nonsense about not being suited for a relationship, when youd never even asked her for one! part of you wanted to cave and run back to her but you promised yourself to keep your heart guarded from that point on.
the pain was too much. you were too scared of seeing her again and just breaking apart crying, having to be held by her, losing your dignity. you were so devoted to her for two months, you had been convinced that you had found your future girlfriend, that it was only a matter of time, judging by the way she looked at you and kissed you and held you, and you promised yourself to never ever let her have you again.
for a week it was absolute and utter hell. you completely isolated yourself and slept whenever you weren’t busy because you couldn’t face reality while not being distracted - you lost your appetite, ignored calls and texts, stayed inside on the weekend, neglected your chores and just tried to go more than a few hours without crying (it hardly ever worked. once you broke out in tears in the middle of the street because a song that reminded you of her came on)
after that first week, spite and anger took over. you tried to tell yourself that she was just some middle aged loser and that you could find way better than her (that didn’t help at all) - you watched films with actors she hated as a “fuck you” to her but it didn’t work either, it obviously only made you think of her more - you were irritable and pissed off and almost broke a plate once when you stood in the kitchen and remembered how she’d held you in her sleep, how she’d helped you shower when you were sick once, how she had kissed your back all the way down your spine when you laid on her bed face down, how she’d just sat there after doing all that and told you it was “too much” for her. as if she hadn’t been the one to shower you in affection first. as if you’d ever pushed her to do a thing.
about two weeks later you almost unblocked her because you were so miserable and lonely without her, but you were steadfast and just cried your eyes out each night instead, wishing she hadn’t ruined it, hadn’t pushed you away, the memory of her laugh and her scent and her hands all over you and her voice over the phone haunting you and messing with you so horribly that you cursed yourself for blindly falling for her the way you had.
eventually you managed to regulate your feelings somehow but you still avoided walking down the street where you two had always gone to get coffee. you still flinched whenever you saw a woman with long red hair. you still dreamed of her, all the time, hoping and praying that she was being eaten up by guilt. that she regretted it all. that she hadn’t gotten over you already.
how she got you back:
three months after you broke it off, you were sitting at a cafe, doing some work, blissfully unaware of what was about to happen.
Van had just gotten her cup of coffee and thought it would be really weird to sit at a table near you without acknowledging you at first, so she got over her absolute panic and tapped you on the shoulder
for a few seconds you stared at her, not smiling, not frowning, just processing, overwhelmed by the thought "fucking hell. I still love her." the moment you laid eyes on her face, her freckles, her hair, a bit messy but pretty as always, her outfit that was one of your favorites of hers, your whole body buzzed with that old need to reach out and touch.
still, you tried to mask it and just said "oh... hi." as coldly and unfeelingly as you could manage. Van was really nervous and a bit awkward as she said "hey. sorry, I really hope I am not disturbing you. uh, would you mind if I-" she gestured at the seat across from you. you crossed your arms and remained somewhat stoic as you said "sure, yeah", trying to act like her voice wasnt burning your whole body up, wasnt forcing the echo "I missed her, I missed her, I missed her" into your mind.
she sat down and drank from her coffee and cleared her throat, while you just sat there watching, waiting for her to talk because you wouldn’t make it easy for her.
Van started by saying "so, how have you been?" immediately regretting it after, realizing how weird that was to say to someone whose heart you had broken mere months before. you gave her a puzzled look and just said "well, I’ve been better. but it’s fine, nothing much changed since we last spoke." you wanted her to feel bad and she did. she really did. so she cut the small talk and got to what she had wanted to say to you for weeks.
her voice was quiet and low when she said. "okay. listen. I am really glad I ran into you here, because I wanted to apologize, properly. I know that it won’t change a thing and I know you might not wanna hear it but I need you to know that I regret it horribly. what I did. what I said. how I said it. everything. it was just... yeah I was awful to you." she admitted, looking at her hands, not at you. you could tell she meant it, you could hear the hurt in her voice, you almost teared up but you didnt say a word. you waited for the rest.
she went on "and I need you to know that it had absolutely nothing to do with you." and that made you scoff then, laugh almost, but she shook her head and insisted "no please, I mean that, it was my fucking issues, nothing you did", but you interrupted her and said, "Van you do realize that that is insanely hard to believe right? to be cut off like that out of nowhere, after everything we did together, of course that made me feel like fucking shit. like I went wrong somewhere without knowing. of course I have been wondering about what I did wrong, what else would I be doing?".
that made her feel even worse. her eyes went all soft when she saw it written all over your face and she had to stop herself from reaching out to touch your hand. she sighed and thought for a second before changing strategies.
"okay, this is gonna sound so weird but please bear with me. you have never googled me, have you?" she said next, which confused the hell out of you. you shook your head and she said "yeah I figured, because uh... well. you’d have seen something. go on and look up my name for a second, and add the word "yellowjackets"" she told you. you almost asked her to leave and stop the weird shit but you felt generous so you said "okay." and pulled out your phone, curious enough to see what on earth she was referring to.
Van realized that it would take ages for her to explain all of her trauma and all of the reasons why she is fucked up in regards to trust and feeling dependent on someone, why letting herself be open scared her, on a visceral physical level - she knew she wouldn’t be able to find the right words, she’d tried, she’d drafted letters and texts and had despaired over what to say if she ever saw you again, but sitting there she thought fuck it. might as well try this.
you typed in her full name and added "yellowjackets" after - Van watched your face intently, a bit scared, a bit embarrassed and saw it then: your utter disbelief. the search results flashed in front of your eyes: words like "plane crash", "mysterious case", "true crime", "cannibalism", "cult", "miracle", "rescue". a bunch of links to podcasts discussing the case of the plane that crashed in the 90s with a high school soccer team and sure enough her name "Van Palmer" among a bunch of others, again and again, a blurry picture of a young redhead that was obviously her next to other girls.
you couldn’t process it - you silently scrolled through a few articles and skimmed them as she whispered "yeah.... yeah. and I am not making you look at that to use it as an excuse for how I acted, absolutely not, that was my fault, fully. but maybe this sheds a light on why I am... well. you know" - "fucked up" you finished her thought, which made her laugh in relief, the fact that dark humor was still something you were willing to offer her, "yes. exactly."
you hated to admit it but it did make you see things a bit differently then - she’d told you about her mother, her home life, and that horrible nightmare-ish experience on top of her already less than ideal upbringing seemed like an explanation for how she’d acted, why she might have some issues with closeness. it wasn’t an excuse but you could acknowledge that her trauma was uniquely awful: at age seventeen, all of that.
for second you felt like crying, thinking of her at that age, being that scared and hurt. in a way it impressed you almost, that she wasn’t a completely lost cause, that she was so charming and funny and able to put up a tough front. a lot of conflicting feelings swirled around in you then.
her heart beat out of her chest as she watched you process it all but she was also a bit impressed by the fact that you didnt seem scared or disgusted. she was prepared for you to yell at her that she was a fucking freak for keeping that from you, that she was a disgusting person and should leave you alone for good, that you felt deceived, but you did none of that.
you were quiet and eventually put the phone down, looking at her, and shaking your head, sighing, "god. so you lived in the fucking woods for 19 months as a girl and actually survived all that??" unable to believe it. Van nodded and said "yeah... would have been better for you if I had perished out there, huh", which got the first hint of a smile from you. you tilted your head and said "no. it wouldnt have.", genuine, almost as if to say "you idiot. I love you so fucking much." which didn’t escape her.
Van was bold enough to touch your hand then, to hold it and to say "god I am so sorry. really. I thought of you every day, it killed me." she confessed. "so did I." you told her, which only softened her more. she leaned forward and squeezed your hands, whispering "please. you don’t have to forgive me at all but give me another chance. let me make it up to you."
you really struggled then for a second because you had told yourself again and again that she was dead to you, that she would never be allowed to have you again, but looking at her in that evening light, her hair on fire, her face kind and open - actually seeing her again, hearing her, feeling her touch, it made it impossible to deny it: you wanted her back. you wanted her back more than anything.
she seemed genuinely sorry and you knew you would regret it all your life if youd deny yourself a second chance with her, so you nodded tentatively and said "alright. let’s see what you got", which made her smile as if the sun had just come up for the first time since three months of pitch black. she couldn’t believe that youd actually agreed, so she took both your hands in both of hers and kissed your knuckles briefly, while saying "I missed you... I missed you so much."
in that moment you thought about her past, the fact that the woman youd cried over for weeks had been the subject of many articles and podcasts and crime documentaries, and you hadn’t been aware at all - it made you feel an unexpected rush. a sense of power. that someone who apparently had a past of brutality and cannibalism and feral living, had often been so soft and submissive with you, had let you boss her around and manhandle her, had wanted you to. it made your grin to yourself, and she caught it, that you liked it, having someone with a past like that throwing yourself at your feet while begging for forgiveness.
it turned you on, to think that Van was portrayed as a barbaric monster in some of the discussions about her time out there, when she had often surrendered to you, had never tried to overpower you because she liked being your baby, she liked being all weak in private, while seeming tough out in public. she had missed it terribly, she had missed it to a point of almost going insane, the way she had felt in your arms, when you stroked her hair and kissed her, when you gave her exactly what she needed, when you turned her on with just a simple touch.
"so uh" she said then "do you wanna maybe.. come home with me, like.. right now" you agreed and got up with her to leave the cafe and go to her place which was a few blocks away.
as you walked, you definitely teased her about what you had just found out, asking her things like "so. did you guys all have group lesbian stuff going on out there, or..." which she laughed at and said "oh, no, nothing that fun, we were too busy starving and fighting and having freaky religious ideas to all fuck each other. but who knows, maybe I just don’t remember" she was glad to see that you could laugh with her again, that you let her take your arm, that you were amused by her past instead of disgusted or shocked.
"I really fucking suffered you know" you said as you took off your jacket in her apartment "I couldn’t eat for like three days after, I cried so much it started pissing me off, I couldn’t go anywhere because it all reminded me of you. you did me in good" you were in the mood to rub it in a bit, and it worked, she made a sound of pain and looked at you "no, no, stop", but you went on as you sat down on the couch and said "yeah, I was a wreck, you ruined me."
Van joined you and said "if it makes you feel any better if was close to calling 911 on myself not once but twice because I was convinced you could physically die of heartache, so. there’s that." you could tell she wasnt lying, so you said "yeah it does actually", not meaning it, since you hated the idea of her in pain, even when you were cross with her.
you wouldn’t just let her kiss you. you sat close together and she was clearly very desperate to touch you, so you said "beg me for it. I remember you being quite good at that." your tone stern, your eyes never leaving hers, and that made her weak in the knees then.
she flushed and nodded as she leaned closer to you and whispered "I missed you so much, you have no idea. I dreamed of you all the time, all the fucking time, I havent been with anyone since, I couldn’t, didnt want to. I need you to touch me so bad, please. please..." she kissed your cheek, once, twice, a third time, gently, as she caressed your neck, waiting for you to cave. you closed your eyes and soaked it up, being pleaded with. she gave you more, "I will do whatever you want, I will do anything. you can do whatever you want to me."
that was the way to win you over for good, she knew it, you opened your eyes again and took her face in your hands then. you stared at her lips, then at her eyes and said "I should punish you, you know."
instead of protesting Van sighed "please. yes." which made you lean in and breathe against her lips, smiling "yeah?", her whole body hot with sheer need.
Van had always been somewhat of a masochist but with you, right then, it was even more intense because she believed she deserved whatever pain you would make her feel. she craved it. she wanted you to take it out on her. she wanted to repent. you could tell. but you would keep that for another time. in that moment, all you wanted was to have her at your mercy, and you did, so you eventually leaned in and kissed her.
the hours after were a total blur. all of your unspoken feelings bursting out at once, both of you clinging to each other and kissing like you had been separated for years - it was deeply charged and emotional and intense in a way that surpassed everything you’d done before, you almost cried at certain points when you fucked that evening, both of you, because you’d missed it so much. the one upside of all the ache and the hurt over her was that fucking again made you both orgasm in ways that almost scared you in their intensity, similar to your first time of having sex, but so different too, a shared attempt at melting back into each other after your period of almost dying of heart ache over each other.
from that point on Van worshipped the ground you walked on. she had been a sweet lover before but the thrill of you letting her back into your life, opening your heart again, made her feel such a deep sense of gratitude, that she became an even better lover to you, just to prove herself worthy of your grace. she wouldnt lose you again. no way. no way in hell.
the day after getting back together, in the morning, she used a quiet moment to look at you and ask "so. do you want to be my girlfriend." making sure that you knew she was deeply serious about you, that she was not going to back away again, that she wanted you to be hers for good.
you took a second to answer, to make her wait, but then you smiled and said "yes. of course." which made her come over to where you were sitting to tightly wrap her arms around you from behind and kiss your neck, whispering "I love you, I did all along, you know", something neither of you had said before, and she didnt expect you to say it back but you did - you stood up and face her, your hands on her waist "I love you too. so much. it nearly cost my sanity". Van kissed you then and as she felt you give into it and caress her skin under her shirt, she thought of the world "girlfriend" over and over and wondered how she ever convinced herself that that wasn’t exactly what she had wanted all along: you, being hers, all hers.
a bonus, how you had sex after you got back together, including the punishment idea:
you once tied her arms to her bed, to make her watch you as you got off. Van just squirming and whining and growing unbearably wet as she watched you touch yourself - you getting turned on from her gaze burning into your body as you jerked yourself off and gave her a good show, knowing it was killing her that she couldnt touch you or herself - you threw a "you sound pathetic" her way in the middle of it, to try and be mean, but predictably that only turned her on more... you weren’t all that sadistic, so after you finished and untied her, you let her lap up the mess youd made and let her get you off again.
before that though, you pushed your fingers down her throat to make her lick off your cum, but that wasn’t a punishment at all, she sucked your fingers off gladly, and deep down you knew that you were giving her what she needed, that she wasn’t suffering one bit, that she was delighted by your dominance
overstimulation. yeah, god help her... you did that already before but after you got back together, you really got into it: fucking her senseless, leaving her a shaking mess, making her cry from how relentlessly you were pleasuring her - telling her "this is what you wanted, right?" while giving her yet another orgasm, her just taking it and pretending it was too much when it absolutely wasn’t - few things pleased her more than having you manhandle her and get all over her, teasing her, pinning her down, adjusting her position to eat her out from the back while she cried into the pillow and lost her mind.
bruises. you had never been shy with bruising her but after getting back together, you definitely got more aggressive with it, sensing that she wanted it, having a physical reminder of your force - on her inner thighs or her chest or her neck. she loveees it, seeing bruises on her body when she gets dressed, makes her feel claimed <3
on the other hand, when you were on the receiving end, she loved being on her knees, especially during the weeks after you got back together - she loved to have you standing up or at the edge of the bed while she hurt her knees to please you, to eat you out with feverish need, to give you exactly what you needed and to be in a position of repentance. her every touch a way of saying "I love you. I wish I had never hurt you. I will be so good to you from now on. so so good. my baby" and it worked: you were all hers when she got like that, moaning her name and tugging at her hair and letting her take care of you, opening up again, literally.
sometimes you’d sit on the couch and complain about a random ache in your body and she’d immediately be like "I got it" and get you to lay back so she could give you head, whether you were dealing with period cramps or back pain or general discomfort, she would immediately be of service (I think her approach to topping/giving is rather submissive, she just wants to please, that’s it, no need to give orders, she just wants to take them and please, and she does. always.)
you definitely fucked so much during your first week back together that you both got sore from it and had to slow it down... you were starveeeed.
about a month into it, things got settled, you were used to being openly in love by then, being girlfriends - you realized that you had all the time in the world and fell into a comfortable rhythm, both in and outside of the bedroom - you knew each other so well that it came naturally. you also moved into her place eventually <3 and you took a trip together for the first time to get away and have a feeling of a fresh start <3
yeah, thats it 💌
#I really enjoyed this one#feel free to lmk what you think#van palmer x reader#van palmer#yellowjackets#yellowjackets x reader
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In the end, it is misogyny but in the form of that Imogen (and most of the female cast, if we are being fair) gets reduced to just being a woman to the point that criticizing any real flaw, wrong doing, or "hey i personally maybe perhaps don't like that she did this" is turned into an attack on her because she is a woman, because after all, all women are perfect and so so dainty they must be protected (sarcasm)
Without mentioning the attacking real women in the name of the fictional one
It really is the "God forbid a woman do anything" but in it's worst form
Sorry for venting, been having thoughts about the fandom for the past 5 years
YUP. I do recommend Unlikeable Female Characters by Anna Bogutskaya which I devoured in like, one sitting over my winter break and posted a bunch of excerpts from but this discourse is extremely not limited to the CR fandom. I mean, think about all of the endlessly churning nonsense about the women of Gone Girl and Midsommar. I am going to see Love Lies Bleeding tomorrow and have steered well clear of really any discussion because I simply would like to see buff lesbians in a crime drama but apparently the discourse is rancid.
Of course there are people who assume ill of female characters while excusing men. That is absolutely a big problem. But again, we can barely talk about that. I recently made a post about how Laura is not a particularly chaotic player, and indeed is one of the most cautious players in actual play, and again I think there is a serious and important conversation to be had about how there's probably a reason why, say, Travis and Taliesin are more likely to make extremely bold moves, because they didn't get raked over the coals during C1 for stealing a cool broom from a guest character! I actually think Marisha has managed to hang on to some of her boldness and it makes her a stronger player but I would not have been surprised if she retreated after the hate she got from Keyleth. But yeah, in actual play, bold moves are pretty important. We can't even talk about how real-world misogyny holds back the actual actors without some moronic wretch being like "FIGURES THAT A MISOGYNIST CUNT LIKE YOU LIKES A MALE ACTOR."
When a character who is a man - or in some cases, characters who are not men but are played by men - does something people don't like we can say "wow, I didn't like this, but it was an interesting choice by the actor!" but we aren't allowed to either talk about the reasons why a real world woman might hesitate to play a character who does ugly things - because of the misogynistic backlash that will land specifically on her as a real person - nor can we compliment her for going for it and playing a complex flawed character, because how DARE you say a woman is anything less than some kind of Divine Feminine ideal. At best you're allowed a two-dimensional caricature of She's So Sweet And Good But Sometimes Gets Angry (this also happened to my friend Keyleth).
And this might reveal my own biases but like. I as a woman don't love being called self-centered, but that, personally, would probably lead me to some reflection. If you call me a girlfailure, even jokingly, I am going to break your nose. It's really telling that like...one of the absolute no-brainer "hey stop calling grown women girls" feminist tenets has gone by the wayside particularly with the set of people who think that meta that fails to put women on so high a pedestal they are untouchable is misogynist. They are awful towards women, fictional and real.
A line that always stuck with me from, bizarrely, a book about wordplay, was that Victorian men would treat women of their same classes as their superiors, but never their equals - they would coddle them and protect them but they wouldn't actually engage with their thoughts and foibles. (This happened to my friend Jester).
Anyway my personal solution is to keep going. On some level, as my previous post indicates, while I don't want the harassment it also only underscores my point, that a lot of these people are way more invested in being a dick to women on the internet than writing meta about the pretend women they think they like. I have to imagine they're doing this because either think they're entitled to meta they like from people who can actually fucking write it because god knows most of the people making this complaint have the most "if you can't dazzle them with brillance, blind them with the most purple-prose bullshit you can muster" attitude; or because they literally are just champing at the bit to attack women online with the ostensible veneer of "but it's FEMINIST to call THESE women cunts because they said my blorbo wasn't saintly and flawless." However, again, I know that I'm pretty bullheaded and forcibly unlearned the uh, patriarchal idea that women should not be confrontational. I do not blame people who look at this whole situation and say "I'm going to keep my thoughts to myself because this is so unpleasant."
#answered#Anonymous#i got a ghost message too that i only assume is for the same reason as my previous anon#and like. ngl. i'm THIS close to naming suspected names. like i have tried to keep quiet but *rashinna voice* can we take out the trash#i'd love to see more meta about imogen but again i don't blame the people who are like nope not worth it.#cr tag
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Every Track in Rise and Fall of a Midwest Princess and which BNHA character it is about.
Yeah that's right I did a bad one about Charli XCX songs and I'm here with ANOTHER atrocity but this time I'm desecrating Chappell Roan our lord and savior I'm sorry. It's out of love. But also a hot mess. And I'm drinking wine alone because I wasted a Sunday night on a first date and I did NOT jive with the gal (she kept talking about her ex help meeeeeeee). Just to #setthescene
Femininomenon: Uraraka Ochako. WHY CAN'T ANY MAN? I love lesbians man. I love lesbians so much. And Ochako you're my favorite as of yet undetermined wuh luh wuh. Love women who like women. And like. Yes. Also again Uraraka is THE Femininomenon. We need her.
Red Wine Supernova: Kirishima Eijirou. I just think he would be on this song. Also his hair! And the vibes! The cool roommates! Didn't quite think it through! I just think he fits! Honorary lesbian! I adopt him into lesbianism!
After Midnight: Shinsou Hitoshi. I also can't explain this one besides "I love a little drama/Let's start a bar fight" being very MonoShin coded and I think Shinsou would be more lighthearted about that. And the spoken part is very command. I like this for him. And it fits the vibes of those two. I love them.
Coffee: Sir Nighteye. He's singing about All Might. I'm crying. Me too bestie! I'm unwell! I love my divorced fathers!
Casual: THEEEE Dabi Hawks anthem and I will not hear otherwise! We kiss I have anger issues! Knee deep in the passenger seat! I love this song it goes so fucking hard and so do they! They are not telling their friends all the details! It's embarrassing and they cannot help themselves!
Super Graphic Ultra Modern Girl: Asui Tsuyu. WE DON'T DESERVE HER! She is my goat! And everyone was hyper mega bummer and did not treat her as she deserved that one time (I'm still mad about how they hurt my girl's feelings at Kamino Ward). I love her, they should all get on her level! (But also I know) (I KNOW) (Present Mic sings this to Aizawa all the time when he's feeling like messing with him) (I support him)
HOT TO GO!: Jirou. Sung to Momo. And it's adorable. It's wonderful. It's perfect. They are all lesbians because I SAID SO damnit. STAND AND CLAP NOW TOUCH YOUR TOES! (The really sick part of me said hot to go is about Dabi but that's just a mean joke how could I ever make it oh wait I just did)
My Kink Is Karma: Todoroki Shouto. Given how he is about his dad! I support a petty queen and Shouto is nothing but a petty queen and this song is about PETTY QUEEN RIGHTS. No need to be hateful in ur fake Gucci sweater because Shouto is doing all the hating in his REAL one u posers.
Picture You: Bakugou Katsuki late late in the narrative about Midoriya Izuku. Because like come on now. Come on now. "It's ritualistic" "I need you around" "Am I in the frame from your point of view?" like COME ON this is about THEM this is FOR BAKUGOU about his DEKU. I'm still wrecked from them. Horikoshi please.
Kaleidoscope: Midoriya Inko. I love her. She deserves better. And the absence of her man, the way she loves Izuku unconditionally no matter what on any terms he wants. Yes Kaleidoscope is a romantic song to an extent but the parental version of it or even just the abstraction of love in general. It's beautiful and unconditional and not always perfect but it's always there and that's what matters. Anyway. I ugly cry to this song. My best friend played it for me on a uke and sang it the other day and I was an ugly wreck. And I am a wreck for Inko because she's such a good and honest person and genuinely does her best for her son. Wow. I'm sniffly.
Pink Pony Club: This is obviously Izuku Midoriya. About quirks ofc, but like the kind of joyous wide eyed earnestness of it all. It's so him. It's so fucking Deku it is perfect. Keep on dancing baby. Have your fun. The joy of it all, the self acceptance, the finding a place of belonging. It's HIM. A year to cause a scene? YES BABY.
Naked In Manhattan: Momo Yaoyorozu. I struggled for this one babes! I did! HOWEVER I do think my sheltered girlie deserves a song about self discovery and fun and GIRLS. I am always on this shit. I will do this for my girlies. They're all lesbians u can't take this from me. The other fun option is David Shield with All Might in their #collegehomosexualrevelries aka when All Might was in the states. I love them. They're a great fling.
California: Shigaraki Tomura. Or Yoichi. Or really any of the OFA holders about their predecessors. Just that hope to get their dreams only to have themselves fail to reach them and it hurts even if it's through no fault of their own. Man. I want them to be happy dawg. But mostly Shigaraki because. Yes. Him and the LOV. Man. "I miss the seasons in Missouri/My dying town/Thought I'd be cool in California/I'd make you proud/To think I almost had it going/I let you down"
Guilty Pleasure: The later, better, more fun DabiHawks song. "I want this like a cigarette" SO TRUE. I love those two lmao they're one of my favorite relationship dynamics. "Some good girls do bad things too" okay girlies you can dream. I love them. They're so fun. Also you can't tell me Hawks wouldn't absolutely go ham on the yodels during karaoke.
ANYWAY TY FOR COMING TO MY TED TALK IT BANGS IT GOES SO HARD I LOVE THIS ALBUM I HOPE ALL OF U ARE YODELING. Please listen to this whole album. Man. I love this album. It goes so fucking hard. It's a pop banger.
#bnha#my hero academia#all might#bnha deku#sir nighteye#izuku midoriya#hawks#dabi#bnha dabi#bakugou katsuki#bakudeku#ochako uraraka#tsuyu asui#momo yaoyorozu#jirou kyouka#shouto todoroki#hitoshi shinsou#mha shinsou#shigaraki tomura#inko midoriya#chappell roan#i'm drunk#Very#Also Good Luck Babe is actually 100% Toga to Uraraka every time she so much as looks at Deku and Bakugou every time Deku looks at Ochako#Crazy blondies looking at the love of their life wasting time with some other love interest#i have no braincells#I'm actually so drunk this is genius to me#Yodel#Yodel bitch!
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fallout mlm dyke drama is so real actually. given that like most of the confirmed bachelors in fallout are like one degree of separation from one other. i like to think that leigh tried to wingman arcade to ignacio rivers and got chewed out by him afterward because they're exes. manny vargas is uhauling with a new man every month while not being over dr richards and dodging two other situationships. boone thinks this is normal
RIGHT like i love the mojave wasteland mlm dyke drama so much. like you really get the whole package when you befriend just one of them. you spend one day at the old mormon fort and you start connecting the dots. arcade and ignacio rivas being exes is so real as well. boone thinks this is normal and is like Wow being gay is so difficult, this is so difficult and intricate. lesbians just go for it
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She Loves to Cook, and She Loves to Eat 2 Eps 1-4 Stray Thoughts
The lesbian sister to WDYEY is back and I am so ready to see these two get deeper into their romance. They had barely started when we left.
Episode 1
THEM. I missed Yuki and Kasuga as much as I missed Shiro and Kenji.
Love that both WDYEY and SLTCSLTE are struggling with inflation.
God this rice bowl looks great.
Ladies, I know food is pricey lately but you cannot sacrifice these meals together. This is an important aspect of your relationship. Can we just discuss modifying the menu??
I love the work bestie. She cuts through the noise and calls it what it is. Nomoto is lonely because she stopped hanging out with the person she's falling for.
Kasuga is definitely not moving out. You see that TV and chair? She's settled. I love her because she does everything real big.
Yes! Have a mochi party! You both like hanging out together!
I was into the mochi pizza concept until they added corn. No thanks
Smash cutting into Nomoto fighting off the itis is exactly what I hoped for in the mochi party.
They're both so tentative with each other, but at least the fondness is obvious.
Episode 2
Wow they captured all of lesbian film discourse in one tweet. The only part they missed was a comment about it being a period piece.
Of course she's gonna watch this film from her kitchen table with a tablet. I get it but you have a friend with an enormous TV.
Baby's first gay film. It'll do that to you. I'm fairly certain my first film was Get Real (1998). I'm not sure what my first lesbian one was. It's either Chasing Amy (1997), But I'm a Cheerleader (1999) or Pariah (2011).
Oh good. Nomoto and Sayama were both offered positions. I was worried they'd be outted against each other.
We have a young woman who just moved in who has a bunch of quality ingredients and no idea what to do with them..she looks a bit disheveled and tired. She is in the lesbian food drama. Oh yeah. It's all coming together.
This was really excellent. The imagery of all this raw potential in the new tenant via her ingredients she doesn't know how to use, with Kasuga's ability to move them around, and Nomoto's ability to find a way to turn it into something delicious. I am ready.
Yes, Kasuga! Suggest meal dates! Nomoto's eyes dilate every time!
Episode 3
I like Sayama a lot. I appreciate that they have her pursuing het romance so I don't have to wonder about romantic tension between her and Nomoto.
There's such a huge demisexual component to Nomoto that I really love.
Wow, it's actually so unexpected to see a romance say that the big swells of emotion in film don't match the experience some of us are having. This is how I've felt my entire life.
Nagumo, you have two women who live alone who want to feed you. You gotta let them in, girl.
Kasuga is always so direct about how much she enjoys spending time with Nomoto.
I love Kasuga so much. She asked Nomoto how to receive the news about her new project at work and didn't assume.
I like these two admitting that they like their lives right now.
Episode 4
I love that Nomoto is doing research now that she knows how to describe her feelings.
I'm so invested in these cabbage rolls you have no idea. I need Nagumo to eat one.
450 yen is not bad for that amount of food! Food is so expensive in America!
I'm losing it over this sushi mat business.
I'm worried about Nagumo! She doesn't seem unloved by her family, but she's clearly going through it!
Nagumo is a gamer, and she put her fridge on the opposite wall Kasuga and Nomoto did.
The Japanese really snapped when they decided that soup was a requirement of most meals.
These rolls look delicious.
I hope the friend on Twitter gets revealed.
I love these two so much, and I'm glad we have 20 episodes if this is the romantic pace we're moving at! I like them balancing the challenges of maintaining their dynamic in the changing world, and I like that they were both willing to invite someone else into their space. I especially love that Kasuga encouraged the young woman to be safe and watch out for herself. I can't wait for their romance to be out in the open and for the new neighbor to comment on it.
#Ben watches#tsukuritai onna to tabetai onna#she loves to cook and she loves to eat#Japanese GL#gl series
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Top 5 lesbian shows you'd recommend?
Wow this is actually a super hard question because I don't know many shows that are exclusively sapphic, like, most of them have a main story and the romance is happening parallel to that, yk? But I'll try to give you my favs shows with sapphic storyline.
Skam - Teenager High School Drama, with multiple seasons but you can skip it (story is practically independent each season and it's super easy to follow it) and only watch the sapphics storylines. You should check Skam German (Druck) Season 6, Skam Spain Season 2, Skam Belgium (Wtfock) Season 7, Skam France Season 6.
The Haunting of Bly Manor - Horror show with top-tier writing here but warning for bury your gays trope. Hella angst at the end and they don't have as much scenes they deserved but it's a beautiful story.
Yellow Jackets - This one is tricky because we have a canon main sapphic couple (they are adorable) but most of the fandom is obsessed with the noncanon couples (we are insane) like lottienat or jackieshauna due to the intense homoerotic subtext for them. The show is annoyingly heterosexual though, but I feel like most watchers ignore that. It's about girls going nuts after being stuck in the wilderness after a plane crash and it should be only about women but somehow they keep bringing man drama to this. You can always skip a lot of scenes like I did 😊
Dickinson - This one is theoretically a biography of poet Emily Dickinson, but it's a very light and adorable comedy series. Just be careful with the ending as it follows Emily's real life and what happened to her (google it if you want spoilers)
Harley Quinn/She Ra - I couldn't pick between those two incredible animations so they are gonna share this spot. They are very different, Harley Quinn is a dark comedy for adults while She-Ra is for children but both are amazing.
Honorable mentions: Orange is the new Black (too many sad endings), The Last Of Us (The main is a lesbian but don't expect happiness this show is brutal), Orphan Black (The couple is amazing but they lack screentime), Derry Girls (Beautiful show but no ship, we have a lesbian character though), Trinkets (Comedy), Wynnonna Earp (An actual Queer Supernatural). I Am Not Okay With This (Cancelled), First Kill (Cancelled), Gentleman Jack (Cancelled), One Day At Time (Cancelled), Everything Now (Cancelled yet season 2 in production).
(dis) honorable mentions: Euphoria (Very toxic couple with a bunch of controversial behind scenes drama. But Zendaya kisses Hunter Schafer so we win while we loose). Killing Eve (Amazing three seasons before the homophobics show runners ignored the book ending to go for the bury your gays in the end), The 100 (Lexa's death created a whole festival you just had to be there), OUAT (pretty sure there were canon couples but the queerbaiting of Swan Queen made me physically ill). Supergirl (I refuse to comment). House of The Dragon (Specifically season 1, because idk wtf they are doing with s2.)
Just remember to check the warnings before watching any of this, especially Yellow Jackets, Everything Now.
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(Sun and Moon Show Theory #5: Ruin X His Roxanne, A Possible Tragic Love Theory )
Wow, it has been a while since I've made my last theory. It was also Ruin-related because I mayyy have an obsession with him. Anyway, this theory is one I've been thinking about a lot lately.
Anyway, in this theory I will be discussing why I think Ruin got together with the Roxanne in his universe. It might get a bit long since I want to piece together his past, personality, and the few things we do know about him. I'll also be adding sources/timestamps if I can and posting a more digestible version of this on the official discord lol.
So far, we know Ruin's dimension was destroyed by the Creator and he watched everyone around him turn against each other due to the virus and then inevitably die. We know he felt very strongly about this. Strongly enough for him to be willing to pretend to be a maniac for years on end to survive just to be able to eventually destroy 5,000 universes worth of evil Creators. Not only to save universes but also to avenge his friends (source: WHY WAS ECLIPSE MADE?!?! in VRChat, 5:38, though I believe was mentioned multiple times). Note that he sounds very deeply sad when talking about his friends, which is in contrast to how he sounds a lot of the time.
This means he was probably really close to the animatronics in his universe. Closer to them than Sun and Moon are to anyone outside their family I bet, seeing as he didn't have a whole celestial family in his universe like what Sun and Moon have going on in their universe. After all, Sun and Moon merged and there was no family drama to come. No Earth, Lunar evil Eclipse (he was the only Eclipse), etc. He likely got to bond with the other animatronics in the Pizzaplex and get to know them, making him become way closer than Sun and Moon are to anyone outside their family. Of course, this would mean he would inevitably interact with Roxanne Wolf.
Now, it's very crucial to mention, in our main universe, Roxanne was wanting to date Sun. Sun was also wanting to date her. In fact, he really, really liked her. The thing is, they were very, very close to becoming a couple, but then Eclipse came in and did that whole maternity chip thing just to spite Sun and then, on top of it, made it so that everyone (Roxy included) hated the celestial brothers for a good while. This led to Roxanne ending up with Glamrock Freddy (only for them to split up a few times and her becoming a lesbian) and Sun being single, not really ever having another chance with her. Sun also sorta convinced himself she wasn't worth caring about and seemingly doesn't have feelings for her anymore.
However, in Ruin's universe, Roxanne never had a maternity chip installed by Eclipse. Also, Ruin himself is a merge of Sun and Moon, and it is very likely that he could have kept Sun's love for Roxanne. He has shown an interest in her during the October takeover, which is the biggest thing that leads me to believe he romantically cared for his Roxanne too! (Source: please tell me when this happens!! I actually forgot, though someone brought it to my attention as well!)
Another thing I thought was important to mention is Ruin's mannerisms and intelligence. I think his polite way of speaking and his love of using extravagant language is something Roxanne (especially early on) would like. I can see him easily being able to think of ways to compliment her and give her an ego boost or just make her feel loved. It's safe to say he really had a chance with her if he wanted in that universe. I think he would've also been the perfect match for her.
In our main universe, Roxanne lost her self-obsessed nature over time and became more caring to her partner, who was Glamock Freddy for the longest time. I think the same would have happened for Ruin and Roxanne, since Ruin is intelligent. Maybe he would have seen her potential as well and seen her more than just pretty to look at the way Sun had.
The tragedy part would come when the virus happened. Roxanne would've been lost to the virus. From the sounds of it, it seems like Ruin only realized what was happening to the others a bit too late (source: WHY WAS ECLIPSE MADE?!?! in VRChat, 5:06). Which means he was probably scared and confused when the virus started infecting everyone. This would mean Roxanne potentially becoming hostile toward Ruin for no reason or maybe worse.
Another theory I had is that she possibly became the first to die. Maybe the virus itself killed her because she couldn't handle it? Someone has mentioned she has always been a bit vulnerable to that type of thing and it would suit her. I know someone had to have died first. When Ruin is in his cell in Parts and Service, he says to Moon that he should mourn with friends stating that it's beneficial, adding that he would know (source: Eclipse Wants to KILL RUIN in VRChat, 10:24). He's speaking from personal experience. This means he and some friends mourned someone he was very close to. What if that someone was Roxanne? What if she died as the virus started to hit before everyone else fully went insane? We don't know her fate, as it is never stated, and it's plausible.
If they were a couple, it would've ended in tragedy. He would have lost her somehow. Not to mention Gregory would've also died.
Ruin also corrupted his older memories. He also does not seem to like thinking back to the time where he pretended to be a killer maniac robot. Yet he has let Moon do other things to him, worse than just looking at past memories and usually has kept his indifferent composure. Maybe some things were to personal for him to allow others to see...
Anyway, this is just a little theory of mine lol. I think it's possible and likely and I'd actually like if it happened because it'd add even more depth to Ruin's decision to destroy 5,000 dimensions! If anything, it's nice to speculate on his past because there's a lot we don't know about him.
#sun and moon show#tsams#sams#tsams ruin#sams ruin#ruin tsams#ruin sams#tsams theory#sun and moon show theory#the sun and moon show
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