#because my gut reaction is to just be like BOTH!!! BOTH ARE GOOD!!!

[therealcocoshady]

Kinktober - Day 18 - Kneeling

Kinktober 2024 Masterlist

A/N : So... Here is the Kinktober episode for the Day 18 "Kneeling" prompt. It also happens to be a sequel to the Day 3 "Pet play" prompt. It is not necessarily smutty but it might actually be one of my kinkiest works so far... Anyway, I hope you enjoy it. And that you don't judge me too much either.

CW : BDSM - D/S Relationship - Kneeling

Before the « pet play » bet, you thought your life would go back to normal after you were done. Except it didn’t. There were a couple of reasons for that. First of all, you had found yourself finding the experience rather enjoyable. There was something about surrendering control to someone else. In your everyday life, you wear the kind of person who tried to stay on top of everything, often to the point of exhaustion. Allowing Marshall to take control over the simplest things had proved to be soothing. It had quieted the noise in your brain in a way you never thought would be possible. You never thought you’d be able to allow someone to boss you around, let alone find it enjoyable. But it was Marshall, someone you’d known for what felt like ages. Someone you were close to and trusted. Maybe he was the one who had managed to turn this into something enjoyable. 

You had been almost surprised at how caring he could be. Before that weekend, he’d been the kind of friend you made dumb jokes with, the one who put up with your chaotic energy. But seeing that side of him… it had felt special. He seemed in his element and, though he’d been in control the whole time, the whole thing had been intimate. So intimate, in fact, that it ended with the two of you in bed. The whole thing was meant to be platonic at first but something had shifted. Sure, there had been attraction before, but none of you had acted on it. You’d always told yourself that just because he was attractive didn’t mean it would be a good idea. But that weekend, the chemistry had been evident and you’d felt a shift, some sort of certainty that he might actually be able to handle you. And he proved more than up to the challenge. That night spent together had been amazing. For the first time in years - maybe ever - you had been in a serene headspace. No intrusive thoughts taking over in the middle of the deed, no anxiety, no feeling self-conscious… and actual pleasure. Unlike previous partners, that man had actually focused on you, attentive to each one of your reactions, able to interpret every moan, every whimper. 

For some reason, you had always thought he’d be the kind to be selfish in bed but you were happy to say that he proved you wrong. The whole night, he dedicated himself to pleasuring you. You had lost counts of your orgasms and, if you were honest, the night was kind of blurry. You mostly remembered the grounding feeling of his hand on your chest and him calling you a good girl. In the following days, the memory of these two words, spoken softly in his husky voice had kept you warm. His tone echoed through your mind and one thing was for sure : you wanted more of whatever it was that had made you feel so good. 

However, the next time you saw Marshall, it became clear that it was easier for him to go back to the way things were. You were hanging out with your group of friends and he greeted you as usual, made small talk the way he always had, and joked around as if nothing had happened. It almost broke your heart. You thought you had both felt that chemistry, but obviously, you were wrong. You were a little gutted, if you were honest. The way he had cupped your cheek right before saying goodbye the morning you left his place, right after a passionate night, had made you feel like he’d definitely want it to happen again. And you absolutely thought he’d make a move, a few weeks later, when he invited you to his place so that you could actually read his prized comic book. He did no such thing. A couple of weeks in, you were resigned : it had been a one time thing. And if you wanted to explore more, you’d have to look for someone else. You were a little intimidated by it, at first, but one evening, after a couple of glasses of wine, you got online and searched for more information. You quickly went down the rabbit hole and ended up spending two days browsing subreddits, before eventually signing up for some social media website that allowed people to connect over BDSM-related stuff. The idea was to connect with people from your area, with whom you might give it a try, but you couldn’t actually bring yourself to take part to the conversations going on there. You were very much an introvert and, though you’d given online dating a try, it seemed like adding a kinky component to it was too much for your nerves to handle. You were sure that you’d enjoy exploring submission further, that finding a dom would help quiet the noise in your head. After all, Marshall had done it. But the people putting listings online, advertising that they were looking for a submissive, made it seem like it required some ivy league-level qualifications. And though Marshall had done a pretty decent job explaining the basics to you, you didn’t feel like you had what it takes. You were ready to give up on the idea when you came across a post promoting a « networking » event in Detroit, in some underground club you’d never heard of. You considered going but, once again, anxiety took over. And it wasn’t exactly as if you could ask a friend to come with you. Unless… 

You mustered up the courage of asking Marshall a few days later, while you were hanging out at his place with a couple of other friends. He went to the kitchen to grab a drink and you decided to follow him, in order to have some privacy. « So… Do you have any plans for next weekend ? » you asked innocently as he grabbed a Red Bull from the fridge. « Nothing definite, yet. Why ? » he replied with a raised eyebrow. «  Well, there is, um, a thing, and I’m thinking of going, but I’m not sure and it’s kind of- I was actually wondering if you’d come with me. But, you know, if you have plans, that’s fine. » you nervously babbled. God, you felt ridiculous. You were a grown woman, trying to connect with people over kinky shit and there you were, asking your fiftysomething year-old friend to basically hold your hand because you were nervous. « what thing ? » he asked, obviously not getting what you were referring to. In his defense, you had done a pretty bad job at getting your point across. « An event » you replied. « What event ? » he asked again before taking a sip of his drink. « it’s a… um… well I suppose you could say it’s a munch » you almost whispered. He stared at you silently for a couple of seconds and you felt compelled to elaborate. « I wanted to meet a… well you know, a dom, but it’s so nerve-wracking and I figured maybe having someone who’s been there before would help » you hummed. He kept on staring at you, without so much as blinking and definitely adding to your nervousness. « But, well, maybe going there with a friend wouldn’t be a good look… I mean, I haven’t exactly researched the etiquette or dress code of these events so, I don’t know, really… » you eventually said. The remark made him chuckle and he gave you a smile, as well as a reassuring squeeze of your shoulder. « First of all, breathe. Also, how about we talk about it later, after everyone leaves ? » he said calmly. You swallowed dryly and nodded. 

For the next two hours, you stayed mostly silent. Maybe asking him to go with you was a mistake. Maybe he thought that you giving this whole thing a try was stupid. He was one of your closest friends but you knew he could sometimes turn into a judgy prick. As the others left, you remained on the couch, nervously biting your lip. He came to sit on a chair opposite from you. « So… you want to go to a munch » he said with a smirk. You nodded, though you avoided his gaze. « Well I tried signing up on a website to meet people but… it’s absolutely terrifying. And I thought that a munch might be better but I think that’s even worse » you admitted. He calmly nodded. « You’re too anxious » he said matter-of-factly. « I mean… yeah. It’s nerve-wracking, you know ? » you replied and he nodded. « So, um, how do you meet people ? » you asked. He gave you a smile and leaned back in his chair. « Well, not at munches » he chuckled. « I mean, obviously, I can’t take the risk of someone spotting me in that kind of event » he explained. « I didn’t think about that. I shouldn’t have asked… » you started but he cut you. « Don’t worry about it. Well… I met my first sub kind of randomly. Then I gave the online thing a try but I didn’t really like it so now I use a service » he explained. You raised an eyebrow. « a service ? » you asked. « Basically a matchmaker » he shrugged. You hummed, thinking to yourself that it made sense. After all, you knew how anxious he could get about going places and, since he wasn’t a big fan of technology, opting for a matchmaking service made sense. « So… how does it work ? » you asked with a hint of curiosity, wondering if maybe you should look into something similar. « I give my requirements and if they have someone that fits the bill, they take care of the whole thing for me. NDA, meeting… then, I can do my own vetting. » he explained calmly and you nodded. And before you could even talk, he answered your question. « That type of service caters to experienced people, though » he warned.  You hummed and he could immediately sense the disappointment. He placed his drink on the coffee table and stared at you. « Anyway. Back to you… you’re looking for a dom » he stated. « Do you know what you’re looking for exactly ? ». 

You stayed silent for a couple of seconds and shrugged nervously. « I’d like to give it a try. You know, when we made that bet, I didn’t expect to enjoy it, but… I did. Not the pet aspect but being guided. So, I thought I’d … explore. » you said quietly. As you spoke, you could see something change in his eyes, some sort of interest. « what did you like ? » he asked in a low voice. « I felt… oddly at peace. As if the noise in my head disappeared. And…I didn’t mind having someone directive in bed » you admitted. He let out a low chuckle and smiled at you. « How about having someone being directive out of bed ? » he asked with a grin. « well, I suppose my boss wouldn’t mind me being better at following orders » you said with a shy smile. « I see » he hummed. The way he looked at you, as if he could see inside your mind, had your heart racing. Mentioning what had happened weeks ago, how it made you feel, had you feeling nervous. « I guess I’m just scared I might not feel as safe with someone else » you admitted. « Why look for someone else then ? » he asked with a slight smirk. You stared at him, almost dumbfounded. « Well, I- you didn’t- I mean… I assumed you would have offered if- you know » you nervously babbled. He let out a small scoff and got up, before sitting next to you. « all you had to do was ask » he said softly. « Easier said than done » you pointed out as you looked down. He smiled and placed a reassuring hand on your knee. « Y/N, it’s me. You know I don’t bite. The worse that could have happened is me declining. » he said gently and you nodded, still looking down. « The reason I didn’t offer anything is because I didn’t want to turn what happened to my advantage » he explained. « But… you enjoyed it ? » you asked. « you know I did » he scoffed. You nodded again as memories of that weekend came to mind. You remembered the way he kissed you, the way he took the lead in the bedroom, guiding you, taking control while always making sure you were alright. « So… would you… be interested ? » you asked in almost a whisper. « Interested in ? » he asked with a smile. You sighed and looked at him dead in the eyes. He knew what you meant and you knew it as well. « I think it’s important that you learn to use your words. Say what you mean. Ask for what you want. » he added with a smirk. You rolled your eyes at him. « Would you be interested in showing me more… sir ? » you asked as you looked into his eyes. He let out a chuckle and eventually nodded. « Yeah. We could give it a try » he hummed. « you free next weekend ? ». 

You gave him a smile, reassured to know that he had enjoyed your weekend together as much as you did and was willing to explore it further. « I am. I’m also free tomorrow though » you said innocently, making him chuckle and shake his head. « Can’t, tomorrow. Also, I’ll need to prepare stuff. But come next weekend and I’ll show you…  more » he said with a warm smile. 

Next weekend couldn’t come fast enough. But when it did, you were both nervous and excited. Beforehand, Marshall had texted you to confirm that you were still up for it, and gave you a few packing instructions. So far, nothing kinky. He just told you to pack your toiletries, meds, pajamas, an outfit you felt comfortable in and another one that was dressier - preferably a dress with high heels. When you arrived at his place, he greeted you with a hug and led you to the dining room. « So, this weekend is going to be a little different from what we did last time » he warned. « Obviously, for the sake of the bet, we kept it simple and easy last time. But this time, you’re going to get a better picture of what being a sub is like. Meaning that it’s not going to be me taking care of you. I mean, I will, that’s part of my job as a dom. But as a sub, you’re going to serve me. » he explained. You nodded and waited for further instruction. « Obviously, both of us have the right to stop everything at any moment. But since today is about showing you more, I thought I would do what I usually do with the subs I’m vetting, so I’ll put you to work right away. That’s ok with you ? » he asked. You nodded again, though this time, you felt a knot in your stomach. You weren’t quite sure what he meant by ‘putting you to work’. He got up and grabbed an envelope that was already on the table, before handing it to you. « Your first assignment will be pretty simple : paperwork. There’s an NDA I’m going to need you to sign. Obviously, we’re friends and I trust you, but this is standard procedure for everyone I’m seeing, so subs are no exception. There’s also forms I want you to fill in. Take your time and come to the movie room when you’re done. And feel free to come if you have any questions, ok ?» he added. He got up and quietly stared at you as you started to inspect the paperwork. Before leaving the room, he cupped your face and gave you a smile. 

You quickly read the NDA before signing it. You didn’t give it too much thought. If anything, you were fine with paperwork protecting the both of you. Of course, the consequences of anyone discovering what you were up to would be disastrous for his reputation but, even though you weren’t a public figure, you didn’t exactly want anyone to know you were involved in something BDSM-related. Especially not with one of your closest friends. For some reason, signing the NDA made it clear in your mind that you were crossing a line in your friendship. And it became even clearer as you glanced at the forms. It was basically a spreadsheet you needed to fill, regarding what you were ok with, what you’d experienced before, as well as your limits (both hard and soft). The least you could say is that the whole thing was rather detailed. You took your time to fill everything, doing some occasional googling on your phone when you needed clarification regarding some of the practices listed. You felt a little apprehensive at the idea that Marshall would be seeing this. Of course, it made sense. He had made it quite clear that the whole thing about consent and safety. But the whole form-filling felt both intimate and clinical at the same time. After a while, you went to find him in the movie room, where he was lounging in front of some  random TV show. « All good ? » he asked. « Yeah. All good. » you hummed as you handed him the small stack of paper. « That was… Dense. » you observed. He chuckled and nodded. « Told you I was putting you to work. I know it’s not the most fun but that’s an important part » he explained. You nodded and looked at him with eyes full of questions. « So… Do I get to see your checklist too ? » you asked innocently. He shook his head. « No need. What matters is your checklist. I mean, if there’s anything on there that I’m not ok with, even if you said you were fine with it, we won’t do it. But as the dom, it’s my job to tailor the whole thing to you and your needs. Not the other way around. ». He stared at you intently, his gaze conveying a seriousness you didn’t see too often. « But…  I don’t get to know what you’re into ? » you asked with a smile and a raised eyebrow. « What you need to know, you will find out soon enough » he assured with a smirk. « But for now, we have something else to focus on. Something important, actually ». 

There was a moment of silence. He got up from the couch, paused the TV show and faced you. You were in the middle of the room, which was dimly lit, with shadows that danced across the walls. Just like the rest of his house, it felt cozy and luxurious. You’d been there so often that, most of the time, you weren’t even aware of your surroundings. But now, you seemed to notice every detail. Your heart was racing in your chest. Marshall placed a gentle hand on your shoulder. « Kneel for me, please » he ordered quietly. You stared at him for a second before doing as you were told. You knelt at the center of the room, your knees pressing into the soft carpet beneath you. He gently directed you, ordering you to rest your palms on your things and keep your head down. You could feel your fingers tremble slightly and you tried your best to steady your breathing. You could hear him pace behind you, his presence filling the room. You had both agreed that this weekend would be some sort of training, an opportunity for you to see more. Your thoughts were swirling in anticipation. You had no idea what was coming next but you trusted him. Finally, he spoke, his voice low and commanding, cutting through the stillness like a blade.

« Kneeling is more than just a position, Y/N, » Marshall said, stepping into your line of sight, his eyes fixed on you. « It’s a reminder of who holds the power, of who’s in control. » Your breath caught in your throat. His voice alone made you feel small, not in a way that diminished you, but in a way that made you aware of how much you were surrendering to him. It wasn’t just about kneeling—it was about giving yourself over to him completely, about letting go of your own control. Marshall crouched down in front of you, his eyes meeting yours for the first time. There was a seriousness in his gaze, but also a hint of something else—something that spoke of patience, of care. « When you kneel for me,” he continued, “it’s not just a physical act. It’s a symbol of trust. You’re giving me your submission, and in return, I’m giving you my protection, my guidance. Do you understand that? »

You nodded, your throat tight. « Yes… Sir, » you whispered, voice trembling slightly. He tilted his head, watching you carefully, a hint of a smile tugging at his lips, though the serious frown remained.  « Words are easy, Y/N. I need to know you feel it. That you believe it. » Your gaze faltered for a moment, your mind racing. You had wanted this—craved the sense of belonging, of purpose—but now that you were here, the weight of it all pressed down on you. You didn’t want to disappoint him. You didn’t want to fail. « Look at me, » he said, his voice softer now. You lifted your eyes to meet his again, and when you did, you saw the intensity in them—the same intensity you saw in him whenever you witnessed him at work, in the studio or on stage, in the lyrics he rapped with fire and conviction. But this wasn’t the Marshall the world knew. This was the man who was about to take you under his control, and the depth of his focus on you was overwhelming. « I need you to remember something, » he said slowly, his hand brushing along your jawline, making you shiver. « When you kneel, it’s a choice. You’re choosing to trust me. You’re choosing to give me control. But once you make that choice, Y/N, you don’t get to question it. You don’t get to doubt it. When you’re down here, at my feet, I am in control. Understand? »

His thumb traced your lower lip, the touch almost tender, and yet it held a kind of power that made your stomach tighten. You felt the weight of his words, of what he was asking of you. It wasn’t just about the physical act of kneeling—it was about giving him your mind, will and obedience. « Yes, Sir, » you whispered again, but this time, there was more certainty in your voice. « Good girl, » he murmured, his eyes never leaving yours. The praise made your heart flutter, warmth spreading through you at his approval. Just like that weekend, weeks ago, when you had played the role of his pet. Marshall stood slowly, towering over you as he resumed pacing, his presence once again commanding the space around you. « When I say kneel, you drop to your knees without hesitation. It doesn’t matter where we are or what you’re doing. When I say the word, you obey. No questions, no second-guessing. » You nodded, your body already responding to the firmness in his voice. You could feel the power shift between you, the way his dominance seeped into every word, every movement. « Right now, you’re learning what it means to submit to me, » he continued, stopping in front of you again. « And I want you to understand something important—this isn’t just about control. It’s about connection. When you kneel, you’re not just giving up your power. You’re giving me something precious. And in return, I take care of you. I help you thrive. »

His words were grounding, filling you with a sense of calm amidst the uncertainty. You weren’t just kneeling for him because he demanded it—you were kneeling because you wanted to. Because you trusted him to quiet the noise in your head. Marshall circled you, his fingers brushing over your shoulder as he passed, sending a shiver down your spine. « Keep your eyes down, » he ordered, and you quickly dropped your gaze to the floor again. He stopped behind you, close enough that you could feel his breath on the back of your neck. « You’re mine, Y/N. When you’re here, in this position, I need you to remember that. You don’t need to think. You don’t need to worry. All you need to do is obey. »

Your pulse quickened at his words, a mixture of anticipation and fear swirling in your chest. You could feel the weight of his dominance pressing down on you, but it wasn’t suffocating. It was freeing. « I’m the one in control, » he said firmly. « And when you’re with me, like this, I will always be in control. Do you trust me with that? » You nodded, your voice soft but certain. « Yes, Sir. » Marshall moved back around to face you, crouching down once more so that your eyes and his were level. His hand cupped your chin, tilting your head slightly upward. « Good. Then let’s begin. »

And with that, you felt the world around you shift. You were no longer just yourself—you were his. Surrendering to him, to his control, was the first step in a new journey and you could feel it.

[sass-ruby]

Okay so um, I'm gonna be talking about these two episodes today! (Prepare BECAUSE OH MY GOSH.)

Alright, we'll start with the first one. Can I just say that, moon absolutely angered me so much. Moon, NO ONE IS ASKING YOU FOR AN EMOTIONAL SPEECH NOR ANYTHING. It's the fact that you COMPLETELY ignored sun, didn't even bother to check up on him, and then went to work in your lab to find a solution?? Looks like history is repeating itself. But.. why? Why is the same thing repeating again? WELL I HAVE A THEORY! Sun's gonna die, someway, somehow and that's gonna be the only way moon realizes. I think this because of solar specifically. When solar heard that moon won't check up on sun, he sounded absolutely disgusted. Keep in mind, solar lived in HIS SUN'S head. That sun ALSO had a moon, and I bet solar has watched the same exact thing happen. And what happened when solar's sun died? Solar's moon went insane! Imagine the guilt moon would feel, gut wrenching. He probably ALREADY feels guilty, but would rather let it consume him whole than to comfort sun or AT THE VERY LEAST HUG HIM

Sun was there with moon during moon's (valid) breakdown, but moon being there for sun? NOOO, OF COURSE NOT!

Also if moon's gonna start with the "I'm not good with emotions" stuff, I'll lose it. YOU HAVE PROVEN IN OTHER VIDEOS THAT YOU CAN, MOON. Neptor's funeral, OR HELL WHEN THE WHOLE FINDING OUT DAZZLE'S SECRET THING HAPPENED. He listened about every kid, comforted, reassured, he was there. Although, now he's just ignoring sun. I think it's because he's a coward. And by a coward, I mean that he's too scared he'll say something wrong or make it worse, because the word is about NEXUS, someone who moon HATES, though sun loves nexus, evil or not, he was still his brother.

Moon doesn't understand that, he's jealous most likely. It reminds me so much of when nexus wasn't insane.. he was bad talking moon, and when moon returned? Moon was bad talking nexus. Both didn't want to be like each other, they DESPISE each other, calling each other knock off's (okay, THAT PART WAS KINDA FUNNY I'M SORRY.)

But.. where is sun in all of this? He missed each one. He loved each one. He loved them. He still loves them.

But they BOTH didn't understand how their words hurt sun. They're so similar in some ways, it's absurd. AND THEY DON'T EVEN REALIZE IT. Reminds me of the song "over and over" by Rio Romeo.

If sun dying is the only way for moon to realize, I'll be willing to accept it even if it is quite sad. It's disappointing, truly.

Monty's and lunar's reaction, I expected honestly. By the way, lunar-, "he's doing worse than I thought he would be.." ARE YOU STUPID, HE JUST KILLED HIS EX BROTHER?? Didn't you go through the same damn thing too? As for monty, not even surprised one bit. He's always been like that, I never really liked him, but oh well.

And THANK YOU SOLAR FOR BEING THE ONLY SANE PERSON EXCEPT MAYBE EARTH BECAUSE GOSH THIS SHOW AIN'T FOCUSING ON SUN'S HEALTH MUCH.

The urge to b*tch slap almost everyone.

I genuinely want sun to have a breakdown, he chose moon, but moon didn't bother to even check up on him.

Gosh.

------------------------------

ANYWAYS, TODAY'S EPISODE!

Just gonna add this picture again, because why not

Wow- genuinely just wow- that was-.. wow

So dark sun DID end up doing something. I must've missed something in the past video, but interesting..

I heard a person say, I forgot who it was but that SUN was the key of this whole plan

He killed nexus, he pulled the trigger and made a choice which means.. that way other suns also made choices instead of not acting

I have NO idea how sun managed to make that happen, BUT THE THEORY MAKES SENSE

In a way, I was right- he IS trying to stop the dimensional abuse of suns by them killing their own moon, I SUCK AT EXPLAINING

if anyone can explain this theory better than me, PLEASE DO.

I felt so bad for the sun in this dimension. Poor thing. Sounded scared and terrified, while repeating "I hate you", while crying and also while bashing HIS moon's head with a barrel

I wanted to hug him QwQ poor baby.. we need a name for him

ALSO HE'S MY CHILD NOW. I'M ADOPTING HIM.

Moon tried his best to keep that sun at peace, WHICH BRINGS ME BACK TO THE SAME TOPIC, WHY DOES HE HELP EVERYONE EXCEPT HIS SUN

I get it was a different situation BUT CMON.

I suppose I already ranted enough about that part, though

I would add more but I'm INCREDIBLY tired and all.. so um yeah-

[nixie-deangel]

*knock knock* trick or treat! ☺️

Pacific Rim AU!

So. To be really honest, I don't actually have a solid idea for this one. Because, on the one hand, put them both in a jaeger and force them to truly know each other and have to fight big monsters together is just !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

But on the other hand, I can't get over the thought of one of them being a pilot and the other, like head mechanic or something on the jaeger, and being forced to have to stay back while the other goes off to risk their life. It's just !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So. I'm kind of stuck at this dilemma with this one lol.

Trick or Treat with Nixie!

[bastardlybonkers]

i feel like not enough ppl are factoring in the cultural clash between laios and shuro and the many micro agressions shuro faced while being in their group. literally the name 'shuro' in itself is one

his name is toshiro 😭 lets also not forget that he has his own communication issues, in the opposite way that laios does- thats literally a factor in their argument, that his envy for laios's ability to express himself sincerely manifested as part of his distaste for him.

ig all this to say like, was their fight heart wrenching, especially when reading laios as autistic? absolutely. anybody whos ever been in laios's position knows how much it hurts to realize someone you thought was your friend doesnt actually like having you around, especially when they didnt tell you and you had no way of knowing due to not understanding their cues. but im begging yall to step back and see the nuance of this situation cause im gonna be real a lot of you are kinda just brushing over it acting like everything is toshiros fault and that hes a terrible person when in reality hes an average guy who really, really clashed with laios and it led to a very long misunderstanding due to their supremely opposite methods of communication. even laios and toshiro, after letting everything out in their fight, were able to come to an understanding and start a foundation for an actual friendship built on better communication

ok yknow what Edit: i shouldve made it even more explicit at the end of this post, i hadnt thought i would need to since i started the post with this, but i think a few too many people are missing my point so i just wanna clarify. i shouldnt have said 'really clashed' and left it at that because yeah they did, but it wasnt just their opposite methods of communication, it is also very much that toshiro was experiencing microaggressions via laios. it may have been unintentional on laios's part, but it still happened and wore him down, made it harder for him to communicate on top of both the more subtle social cues that he was raised with and his own communication difficulties. i also want to say that the fandom reaction to toshiro and the complete ignorance of this point is also racist tbh or at the very least ignorant. i understand that the anime did not cover this panel, and neither did the manga, as this was an omake, but im gonna be real with you guys. there are enough context clues within the story to clue you into this. if you didnt pick up on it thats ok, but i think this is a good lesson in picking up subtext in the stories that youre watching and/or reading. kui shouldnt have to explicitly say 'by the way laios was racist to toshiro' for this point to be understood, and at the very least, when the author portrays a character in a sympathetic light (as kui clearly does) it should make you question Why they are doing so and what makes them sympathetic, rather than youre immediate and only reaction to be 'well i hated what this guy did/said so i hate them and they suck'. idk exactly how to finish this, just. idk. question your biases and gut reactions to things you see in media and stories, and think about whether or not theres subtext that youre missing.

[himbosandhardwear]

Eddie scans the room, looking for who or what he's not sure, just keeping his eyes peeled for something interesting. It's Saturday night, a packed house, some of the usual suspects but some new faces too.

One in particular stands out, especially considering his Sears Catalog attire and artfully tousled hair.

There's something about his loose body language that draws Eddie's eye. He's out of place but he doesn't act out of place. Eddie can respect it.

Unfortunately, when their eyes meet, he gets a kicked gut reaction that makes it clear this guy is off limits. The guy looks away immediately, probably thinks Eddie is more likely to pickpocket him than buy him a drink. Oh well. No great loss, he didn't come to get laid anyway.

He makes his way to the bar, gets a shot of Jack and a Miller Lite and waits. Teddy will probably show up before too long, maybe they can bar hop. He sips his beer and looks around some more, noting the older Mexican lady who runs the flower stand on the corner. You wouldn't guess it just by looking at her but she can drink anyone in the place under the table. He should really get her name.

Sears Catalog has moved to a table on the right side of the room, standing with a presumed girlfriend. Their heads are bent close together. He looks up and catches Eddie staring. They both look away again. He's really gotta stop doing that before he gets hate-crimed. It's a known problem, his type being untouchable preppy boys. He's sure if a shrink studied him, they would say it was because he didn't think he was worthy of love, or some shit, but he can't help it. The straighter, the meaner, the cleaner cut, the more Eddie falls all over himself. It’s a miracle he ever gets laid. Thankfully there’s always closet cases. He swore to himself he wasn't going to do that anymore though, he needs to have some self-respect, not let asshole jocks use him and drop him the second an emotion is displayed.

“That outfit is hideous.”

Eddie jolts in his seat. He finds Sears Catalog smirking at him like what he's said is the height of wit.

Eddie wastes no time pouring the rest of his beer over the guy's head.

He stares back at Eddie in shock, almost hurt. Fuck him. He doesn't care, he's not letting some dumbass gymrat hone his bullying skills on him. Not today.

The guy's girlfriend jogs over with a handful of napkins, which is when Eddie splits.

“I told you not to use that line!” He hears her exclaim. Eddie stops in his tracks.

“But…but...he didn't even let me get to the good part,” Sears laments. Eddie can't turn back around, he's frozen in place.

“Yeah, dingus, because it's a stupid fucking line. I'm sorry you had to find out like this but not every guy who makes eye contact with you wants to fuck you.”

“I know that! I just thought… I don't know. Let's just get out of here.”

He sounds so defeated. Eddie did that. He assumed the worst and reacted accordingly. Like an asshole. Like a bully.

They're halfway to the door when Eddie's feet unstick themselves from the floor. He rushes to intercept.

“What was the rest of the line?” He shouts.

Sears turns, eyes wide, unsure.

His…friend? Looks Eddie over, unimpressed. “What's it to you?”

He winces. “Just…uh…I guess I thought you should know, some of the guys who make eye contact do want to fuck you, they're just too stupid to realize they're being hit on.”

Sears and Mean Friend make their own eye contact. Mostly ‘Beat it' and ‘Are you serious?’ and ‘Yes, oh my god, please go.’

Eddie respects their bond.

Once Mean Friend has sufficiently rolled her eyes and threatened Eddie with bodily harm should anything worse than beer befall her friend, she stalks off into the night.

“You should take it off.”

“Huh?” Eddie responds, stupidly.

Sears smiles. “That's the rest of the line. ‘Your outfit is hideous. You should take it off.’”

Fuck, it really is a terrible line. Something a middle aged creep would use. If he'd waited long enough to hear it the first time it would've made him laugh though, which would have broken the ice.

“Awful. Zero out of ten,” he says while grinning. “Looks like you already offended one guy.” He looks at Sears’ wet shirt, appreciating his own handiwork.

“I'll keep workshopping.” His hand comes up slowly, like Eddie might react badly again. “Steve.”

It's his honor and privilege to clasp Steve's hand in his own.

“Eddie. And can I say, your outfit looks great. It would look better on my floor.”

Steve practically twinkles at him. “Stop, I'm already a sure thing.”

He uses the hand still in his grasp to pull Eddie forward and smash their lips together.

When their grandkids ask how they got together, Eddie is going to have to lie.

[amiableness]

Peonies ; part three

Pairing: Theo Nott x Fem!Reader

Summary: Theo and reader get even closer, and Mattheo is not a fan.

Word Count: 5280

Warnings: Unrequited love & Mattheo and Reader get into it. Let me know if there’s more!

A/N 💌 God, this took me forever to write. I struggled with writers block so badly on this, so if it’s not my best work, I apologize. As always, thank you to @moonpascal for reading, helping me with ideas, and just providing support and comfort. I love you!

SERIES MASTERLIST <3

“Y’good?” Theo looks up from the fire, his gaze shifting to Blaise, who’s now standing beside the couch. The flames had been the only company he’d had for hours. It was late—he couldn’t say exactly how late—just that the common room had emptied long ago, and he’d been sitting there long after everyone else had gone to bed.

“Yeah,” Theo sighs, his eyes drifting back to the flickering flames. “I’m good.” His words are hollow, almost as if he’s trying to convince himself. Blaise watches him for a moment, studying the tension in his posture, before quietly sitting down in the empty space beside him. Neither of them speaks, both of them watching as the flames dance.

Blaise leans back, glancing at Theo before breaking the silence. “You don’t look it,” he says, his voice calm but direct.

“Just thinking.” Theo just shrugs, his shoulders barely lifting, the gesture heavy with indifference. Blaise watches him for a moment, waiting, giving him the space to say something more—but the silence stretches.

“About her?”

Theo’s reaction is answer enough. He exhales sharply, running a hand through his hair with a tired frustration. For a brief moment, he pauses, elbows resting on his knees, his head cradled in his hands.

He drops his hands slowly, lifting his head to glance over at Blaise, his eyes tired, “When am I not?”

Blaise smiles slightly at his words. He’s known for years that Theo liked you—it was impossible to miss. From the moment Mattheo introduced you, Blaise vividly remembers the way Theo looked at you, as if his breath had been knocked from his lungs.

He was completely undone in a single glance.

And if that hadn’t been enough of a giveaway, the little things Theo did for you over the years certainly were—grabbing your favorite sweets from Hogsmeade when you couldn’t make the trip, offering help before you even had to ask, his gaze always seeking you out no matter how crowded the room. It was undeniable, even if Theo never spoke it aloud.

“Listen, mate,” Blaise begins, casting a quick glance at Theo, gauging his expression before continuing. “Do you think this is a good idea?”

“What?”

“Helping her get over Mattheo while you’re in love with her yourself.” Blaise's words hang in the air, and Theo's jaw tightens instinctively, a storm of emotions flickering across his face.

He wants to deny that he’s in love with you, but deep down, he knows it’s pointless. The truth is unquestionable; he’s been drawn to you for years, but these last few months have sent him falling even deeper.

How was he ever supposed to get over you when every moment only pulled him deeper? The way your fingers slipped so easily into his, like they belonged there, the soft curve of your lips as his thumb traced gentle circles over your skin. How sleeping over in your dorm had somehow become routine—he was sure Pansy was staying with Blaise on purpose to give him space with you. And those long walks around the castle, meant to distract you from Mattheo and Veronica, had turned into something else entirely—talks that lasted for hours, about everything and nothing, but always feeling like more.

It’s why he hasn’t left this couch in hours, struggling with the weight of his feelings. The realization hits him hard: he’s completely fallen for you, and he’s trapped. Because in your eyes, he’s just a friend, and that thought feels like a punch to the gut.

“She asked me to, and I can’t say no to her,” Theo replies, his voice laced with a mix of frustration and resignation. “I’ve never been able to.”

“You’re going to get yourself hurt if you’re not careful.” Blaise warns, his tone serious.

“We’ve long passed that point.” Theo sighs.

.·。.·゜✭·.·✫·゜·。.

“Where in Hogsmeade do you get the flowers?” You glance over at Theo, sitting next to you on the common room couch, your question pulling him from his thoughts. Whatever everyone else was talking about had long since lost your interest, and if Theo were honest, he’d admit he wasn’t listening either. How could he be, with you so close? The heat of your body nearly pressed into his side, making it impossible for him to think straight.

“What?” He replies, but the pause lingers just a little too long. He's stalling, clearly hesitant to admit the truth—that the flowers aren't from Hogsmeade.

“The peonies.” You murmur, shifting until you're turned toward him, tucking yourself into his side. His arm rests casually on the back of the couch, and the sudden closeness feels intimate.

“What shop do you get them from?” You ask, your voice so soft it nearly melts him.

His mind goes blank the moment he sees you nestled against his side, looking up at him through your lashes. The way your gaze lingers on him, so close, steals any coherent thought he might have had.

“Why?” He asks, feigning casualness.

“I wanted to get some for myself,” you shrug, “I’ve never seen peonies so beautiful before.”

“No,” Theo responds so quickly that it catches you off guard, an amused eyebrow arching as you glance at him in surprise. The truth is, he hates the idea of you picking your own flowers—he wants to be the one to give them to you. “I’ll just take you with me next time I go, yeah?”

“Yeah.” You nod in agreement, a soft smile tugging at your lips, clearly content with his answer. As you turn back to the conversation, that smile still lingers, and Theo can’t help but admire you for a moment, a quiet satisfaction settling in knowing he was the reason for it. But when he glances back up, his gaze meets Mattheo’s.

Mattheo’s brow furrows as he shifts his gaze between you and Theo, a flicker of suspicion darkening his eyes. Without thinking, Theo drops his arm, casually wrapping it around your shoulders in a possessive gesture—one he knows he shouldn’t make. Your body instinctively leans into him, sending a warmth coursing through Theo; it feels so natural to have you this close. Mattheo’s expression tightens just slightly, his gaze lingering a heartbeat too long before he finally looks away.

You barely have time to enjoy being cuddled into Theo’s side, before Pansy turns to you. Both of you exchange annoyed glances at something particularly ridiculous Draco just said, rolling your eyes in unison. But then her expression shifts from irritation to excited disbelief as she catches sight of you nestled against Theo, his fingers absentmindedly tracing gentle patterns on your skin.

Pansy can’t help but raise her eyebrows, a grin spreading across her face as she processes the scene before her. Before you can send her a warning look, she’s on her feet, leaving Blaise protesting. “It’s time for bed,” She declares, pointedly looking at you. “And you’re coming with me.”

You sigh, knowing all too well that Pansy would make a scene if you didn’t follow her lead. Reluctantly, you lean forward, easing yourself out of Theo’s grasp, but before fully pulling away, you pause. Gently, you press a soft kiss to his cheek, your lips lingering for just a moment longer than usual. “Goodnight,” you murmur quietly, the words almost lost in the space between you before you finally stand.

Pansy, giddy and practically buzzing with excitement, grabs your hand and tugs you toward your dorm, both of you tossing casual goodnights over your shoulders to the boys. Blaise grumbles loudly about not getting a proper goodnight from his girlfriend, while Theo remains silent, a soft pink flush creeping across his cheeks as he watches you walk away, still feeling the warmth of your kiss lingering on his skin.

You catch the sound of the boys teasing Theo the moment they assume you're out of earshot, their playful jabs and laughter unmistakable as they seize the opportunity to rib him. Even from a distance, you can imagine Theo's flushed face as he tries—and likely fails—to brush off their teasing.

“Is there something going on between the two of you?” Pansy blurts out the second you step into your dorm, her excitement practically radiating off her as she nearly slams the door shut behind her.

“No, why would you even think that?” You ask, genuinely surprised, but Pansy just stares at you incredulously, like you’ve completely missed the obvious.

“You’re kidding, right?” She says, crossing her arms. “The sleepovers? The hand holding? The fact that you two are practically inseparable?”

“He’s helping me get over Mattheo.” You insist, feeling the need to defend yourself, though even as the words leave your mouth, they sound weaker than you’d like.

After a couple of months of coming to terms with the reality of Mattheo and Veronica, you’ve found that the idea of them together doesn’t sting nearly as much as it once did. Sure, you still dislike seeing them together, but the ache has softened into something more manageable. If anything, what bothers you most now is your lingering dislike for Veronica herself; there’s just something about her that grates on your nerves.

“Babes,” Pansy says, her tone full of disbelief, like you’re the only one who can’t see what’s right in front of you.

“You know I’d tell you if there was something going on.” You say, but even as the words leave your mouth, there's a flicker of doubt in your chest, as if the truth isn’t quite as simple as you want it to be.

“I guess so,” Pansy replies, still eyeing you with clear skepticism, her gaze sharp as if she's waiting for you to admit what you’re not even sure of yet. “Just so you know, I think he’d give you everything if you let him.”

.·。.·゜✭·.·✫·゜·。.

Your conversation with Pansy hasn’t left your mind in days, and quite honestly, it’s driving you a little mad.

I think he’d give you everything if you let him.

You can’t quite tell if Pansy is subtly suggesting that Theo has feelings for you or if she simply likes the idea of the two of you together. Either way, her words have been playing on a loop in your mind, so much so that you’ve started to feel nervous around him.

Every time he looks at you or takes your hand, your thoughts scatter, leaving you utterly flustered. You’re trying your best to hide just how distracted you are around him, but Theo’s definitely noticed. This morning, when he leaned in to whisper something, your mind went completely blank, every thought consumed by him.

Him, him, him.

The warmth of his voice, the way his hand rested on the small of your back as he spoke—it was all you could focus on. The way his attention never wavered, how it was solely on you, made your heart race like it was the only thing that mattered in the room.

And when you failed to respond, he paused, concern flashing in his eyes as his brows furrowed. “You okay?” His voice was soft, genuine, and somehow that only made things worse. You had nodded quickly, plastering on what you hoped was a convincing smile, but inside, your mind was a chaotic mess.

Had he always looked at you that way? Like he was genuinely checking in, always quietly noticing when something was off? It made you wonder if you’d been blind to it all this time or if this was something new, something you’d only just started paying attention to.

You’re so lost in your thoughts that you barely register when Mattheo bumps into you in the hallway. You cast a quick glance his way, ready to keep walking, but he reaches out, gently grabbing your wrist and pulling you back.

“Wait, hold on,” Mattheo says, his grip on your wrist warm yet insistent, his voice edged with irritation and disbelief. “Were you really just going to walk past me?”

“I’m not doing this right now.” You huff, pulling your wrist free from his grasp, trying to mask the frustration that’s been simmering for weeks.

“Doing what?” His voice hardens, his eyes narrowing in confusion.

“Talking to you.” You snap.

“Why the hell not?”

You feel a surge of irritation, meeting his gaze with a fiery glare. “Because you’ve ignored me for the past few months, Mattheo. Why should I care to talk to you now?”

“That’s not fair,” he mutters, his jaw tightening as frustration creeps into his tone. “It’s not that I’ve been ignoring you.”

“The last time we properly talked,” you snap, “you asked for your jersey back—the one you gave me.” The memory of it still stings, and you can’t help but throw it back at him. “So yeah, Mattheo, it’s more than fair.”

He frowns, clearly caught off guard by your words, his eyes flickering with something between guilt and disbelief. “Listen, I know we haven’t hung out much—”

“Are you being serious?” You scoff, folding your arms as if that could somehow shield you from the frustration bubbling inside. “You’ve practically disappeared, Mattheo. You’ve been too busy with your girlfriend to even notice anyone else.” You want to roll your eyes at the way he looks genuinely confused, like he's completely unaware of how he's hurt you.

He opens his mouth to argue, but you don’t give him the chance.

“You don’t get to be annoyed with me for not talking to you,” you bite out, your voice sharp with frustration. “Not when you’ve been doing the exact same thing for months.”

“I’m sorry, okay? I know I’ve spent a lot of time with her, but it’s the same for you and Theo.” His voice shifts, annoyance replacing the guilt. “You’re always with him. Holding hands, spending the night together-what the fuck is that by the way?”

You take a step back, the heat of his words catching you off guard. “We’re just friends, Mattheo. We’re allowed to hang out.” You keep your voice steady, even as your heart races at the accusation in his gaze.

“Friends? Is that really what you’re calling it?” He crosses his arms, the tension in his posture unmistakable. “Because it looks like more to me. You’re always with him.”

You shake your head, a bitter laugh escaping your lips. “And whose fault is that? You pushed me away, Mattheo. What did you expect me to do—just wait around?”

“I just don’t get why you’re always with him. You and Theo—" He cuts himself off, the words hanging between you.

You raise an eyebrow, challenging him to finish, but he stays silent, “Theo and I what?”

He takes a moment, his gaze hardening slightly, as if weighing his words carefully. “You know what? Forget it,” he says, shrugging dismissively. “I really don’t care what you two are up to.”

You scoff, crossing your arms tightly and shooting him a piercing glare. “Oh, come off it, Mattheo. You clearly care. And honestly, what does it matter to you if I spend time with Theo? You’ve been wrapped up in Veronica this whole time.” Your voice drips with sarcasm, each word punctuating the frustration bubbling inside you.

He falters, his frustration twisting into something more vulnerable for a split second before he shakes his head. Hearing her name seems to snap something in him. His jaw clenches, and he takes a slow, measured breath before looking back at you, his expression hardening.

Mattheo meets your eyes, his expression unreadable for a moment before he rolls his shoulders, dismissing the tension. “Honestly? I’ve got enough on my plate with Veronica. I don’t need to waste my time worrying about you and Theo.”

The words sting more than you expect, and for a moment, the air between you thickens with unspoken feelings and unresolved tension. “Right,” you say, trying to keep your voice steady. “Because you’re so busy.”

He turns away, shaking his head slightly, as if trying to shake off the conversation. “Whatever, just... do what you want.”

You watch as he steps back, the distance between you suddenly feeling too large, and you can’t help but wonder how badly damaged your friendship is—or what’s left of it. You’re so angry that you want to cry, and you’re grateful that the halls are empty as Mattheo walks away, leaving you to stand alone in the deserted corridor.

.·。.·゜✭·.·✫·゜·。.

You had promised Pansy you’d be ready in just a few minutes, but half an hour had slipped by while she was in the bathroom and you remained sat on your bed, lost in thought. Your gaze drifted to the pictures of you and Mattheo that adorned the wall, memories captured in each frame. The urge to rip them down clawed at you, but the thought of erasing those moments felt unbearable. Each smile, each laugh shared now felt tainted, leaving you uncertain of what to do with them.

The argument with Mattheo this morning replayed in your mind like a stubborn song on repeat, and the idea of facing him at the party made your stomach twist with anxiety. In all the years of your friendship, you’d rarely fought—occasional bickering was one thing, but this felt different, more profound. The sharpness of his words lingered, and a nagging fear took root: what if this was it? What if this marked the beginning of the end for a friendship you considered so strong?

“You said you’d be ready.” Pansy sighs, casting a disapproving look at the sweatpants you’re wearing. You hadn’t even heard her leave the bathroom.

You glance way from the pictures and send her a half shrug, “I don’t think I’m going to go.”

“Oh, you absolutely are,” Pansy’s heels click against the floor as she heads to her trunk. “If you stay here you won’t stop thinking about earlier.”

You don’t bother responding—you know she’s right. Pansy continues rummaging through her trunk, the sound of fabric rustling filling the room. After a moment, she straightens up, triumphantly holding a sleek dress in hand, her eyes gleaming with satisfaction.

She shoves the black, silky dress into your hands before pointing at the bathroom, “Go. I’ll find heels for you to wear.”

There’s no point in arguing. Instead, you make your way to the bathroom a slip into the dress, feeling the smooth fabric wrap around you. For a moment, you admire the way it hugs you in the mirror, the cut flattering your body type well. Stepping out, you give a little spin for Pansy, her approving smirk already forming before you even say a word.

“Merlin, that dress was made for you.” Pansy grins as she steps forward, handing you a pair of heels. You take them, slipping them on effortlessly, the added height giving you an extra boost of confidence. Before you can even react, she’s already fussing with your hair, smoothing out stray strands and perfecting every detail. With a quick swipe of lip gloss after making you pout, she steps back, giving you an approving nod.

You can officially call yourself ready.

Pansy laces her fingers through yours as you walk down to the common room. As soon as you step out of your dorm, the noise rushes in, chaotic and overwhelming. You hesitate for a moment, knowing Mattheo is probably at the center of it all. The last thing you want is to run into him after earlier, especially with Veronica around.

You’re relieved when you reach the bottom of the stairs that Pansy has already spotted Blaise, which means the rest of the boys are near. And you’re proven right the moment Pansy pulls you through the crowd. Your eyes land on the boys—everyone except Mattheo—gathered together in their usual spot, laughing and talking like they own the room.

Before you even realize it, your eyes instinctively search for Theo, and it doesn't take long to spot him. He’s leaning casually against the wall with a drink in his hand.

Your breath hitches as your gaze lands on the dark shirt rolled up to his elbows, highlighting his toned arms. The veins tracing down to his hands catch your eye, drawing you in deeper. And those hands—Gods, those hands. An unexpected longing surges within you, a sudden urge to lean into his side, to feel him wrap his arm around your waist, resting his hand on the small of your back, just as he often did.

Ever since his match a couple of weeks ago, it’s as if something has switched within you. No matter how hard you try, your eyes are irresistibly drawn to Theo Nott. It doesn’t help that he’s so attentive, always making sure to check in with you and holding your hand whenever you needed it. In the past couple of months, he has become the one person you feel safest with, the one you can share your thoughts and worries with without hesitation.

Your stomach drops the moment you notice he isn’t alone. A bitter taste creeps into your mouth as you take in the girl standing in front of him—she’s stunning, effortlessly leaning into his space, clearly flirting. A few months ago, you wouldn’t have cared, wouldn’t have given her a second thought, but now it’s all you can focus on. The way she laughs, the way she seems to command his attention—it stings in a way you’re not prepared for.

Without a second thought, you drop Pansy’s hand and head straight toward them. The closer you get, the more her light, flirtatious giggle grates on your nerves, each sound making your stomach twist with irritation. Every step tightens the knot of annoyance building inside you, your focus narrowing in on them, unable to shake the discomfort settling in your chest.

When you draw close to Theo, you reach out and lightly touch his forearm, your fingers trailing down his skin before intertwining with his. It’s a blend of flirtation and possessiveness, and you watch with satisfaction as the girl’s gaze follows your touch.

Theo glances at you, instantly recognizing your touch, but his breath catches in his throat as his eyes travel down your body. Taking in the way the tight black dress hugs your curves, he feels as if his breath has been caught in his throat. The way you’re staring at the girl—your expression unmistakably conveying ‘back off’—stirs something deep within him. He fights the urge to pull you close, his hand finding the back of your neck as he kisses you fiercely, wanting to make it clear that him flirting with another girl is not a possibility.

But he can’t do that.

“I’m so sorry to interrupt—” though you’re not at all. “But I’ve been looking all over for you.” Your gaze flickers up to meet Theo’s, and you catch him watching you with an amused, quirked brow, a hint of a smile playing at the corners of his lips.

“Oh,” she says, straightening up, her expression shifting from surprise to something more calculating. “So the rumors are true? You two are together?”

“If you’ve heard we’re together, then why even bother flirting with him?” You challenge, your voice steady and laced with confidence.

Her lips part in disbelief, and her eyes flicker between you and Theo, who stands beside you, bringing his cup to his lips to stifle the amused smile threatening to break free. The corners of his mouth twitch, betraying his enjoyment, while you stand firm, radiating confidence in the face of her surprise.

She scoffs and turns to leave, causing your confidence to begin slipping away.

Now that it’s just you and Theo, the reality of what you’ve done is sinking in. There’s no way your little display of jealousy didn’t just fuel the rumors that the two of you are together. But not only that, you didn’t deny it when she asked. You keep your eyes on the girl walking away and sigh when you realize she’s gone straight to her friends, no doubt to tell them about how you acted.

“You’re going to have the whole school thinking we’re together.” His voice is soft but teasing, a hint of amusement lacing his words as he holds you close.

He releases your hand, sliding his arm around your waist as he pulls you into him. The move is bolder than usual, more daring than the subtle touches you’re used to from him, and you can't help but blame it on the drink he's holding. His grip is firm, warm, and it sends a rush of heat through you that lingers far longer than it should.

“I’m sorry,” you wince, biting your lip as you glance up at Theo. “I probably just ruined your chances of finding a hookup for tonight.”

In all honesty, you feel more relieved than sorry.

His brow arches slightly, a hint of amusement glinting in his eyes. “Who said I was looking for a hookup?”

You scoff lightly, shifting in his hold, though his arm remains firmly wrapped around your waist. “You do remember we’ve been friends for years, right?” Your voice is teasing as you smile up at him.

Theo shrugs like he’s hardly bothered, his expression softening just a bit. “I haven’t hooked up with anyone in months,” he admits quietly, his voice sincere. The closeness between you feels more intimate than ever, the warmth of his body against yours making your heart race.

Suddenly your mind is jumping to the fact that the both of you have been hanging out for months. But there’s no way you’re going to point that out, so instead you smile at him softly before pulling away.

“I’m gonna get a drink. Do you want to come with me?” You extend your hand, and without hesitation, Theo clasps it in his, his grip warm and comforting.

It didn’t take long for you to feel tipsy; with the number of drinks you’ve had, it’s hardly a shock. Theo wasn’t drinking as much as you were, and he certainly wasn’t going to admit it was because he wanted to keep an eye on you.

Typically, he observed from a distance, leaning against the wall with a drink in hand, as you danced and laughed with Pansy and occasionally Enzo. But he realized he liked being the one that was next to you the whole night, and he’d enjoy the parties way more if this is how they all are.

You let out a sigh, and Theo’s brows knit together in curiosity as he looks down at you. You glance into your cup with a hint of disdain, contemplating whether to refill it. But just as you make a move to get more, Theo gently reaches out, stopping you in your tracks.

Earlier you had convinced him to dance with you, and it took plenty of ‘please’s’ on your end to persuade him. Really, the first time you said it had been enough, but he just liked how pretty it sounded falling from your lips. And once he grew tired of dancing, Enzo stepped in while Theo kept an eye on you as he chatted with Draco and Blaise. If he was tired, he couldn’t imagine how you were feeling.

You offer him a grateful smile as you settle back against the wall. Unfortunately, all the couches and chairs are taken, so you find yourself keeping watch, hoping a spot will open up while you take a breather from dancing with Pansy.

“That didn’t take you long.” You comment as someone leans against the wall next to you, but you’re surprised when you see Mattheo in Theo’s place. The sight of him immediately sobers you, and you find yourself standing up straighter, instinctively avoiding his gaze.

“I lied to you earlier,” He exhales slowly, and the tone of his voice reveals that he’s been drinking. He’s not drunk, but you can tell that the alcohol has certainly taken effect, adding a warm haze to his words. “I do care. I care a whole fucking lot actually.”

“No, I’m not doing this with you.” You cross your arms, glancing over at him and Mattheo shifts so he’s fully facing you with one shoulder against the wall.

“Do you know how hard it is to see you with Theo?” He asks, and you scoff, deliberately turning your gaze away from him. “You’ve got no idea how much it hurts.”

“I cannot believe you just said that to me.” Your head snaps to the side, disbelief flooding your voice as you look at Mattheo. “You have a girlfriend.”

“I know,” he replies, frustration creeping into his tone. “But it doesn’t change how I feel about you.”

“How you feel about me?” Your voice rises, the sarcasm unmistakable.

“I’ve liked you. For years.”

You let out a laugh, disbelief and shock coursing through you. “That’s not funny.”

His expression softens, and he steps closer, desperation flickering in his eyes. “I’m not joking. It’s the truth.”

“Really? You think this is how you show someone you care?” You shake your head, trying to grasp the absurdity of the moment. “You’re with someone else, Mattheo. You can’t just decide to have feelings for me while you’re with her.”

“But I didn’t just decide that while I was with her,” he insists, his voice low and earnest. “I’ve always had them. I tried to push it down, to ignore it, but I can’t anymore. Seeing you with Theo…” His voice trails off, frustration giving way to vulnerability.

“I don’t know what you want me to say.” You sigh, trying to swallow down all your emotions. This is the last place you want to be having this conversation. In fact, you don’t even want to be having it at all.

“I want you to say you have feelings for me too.” Mattheo says and you stare at him in surprise.

Theo stood frozen a short distance away, gripping the fresh drink he had just gotten for you. He knew he shouldn’t be listening in, but when Mattheo confessed his feelings for you, he felt compelled to stay put, unable to move. A knot of dread twisted in his stomach as he braces himself for your response. He knew better than anyone about your feelings for Mattheo, and the possibility that they hadn’t completely faded hadn’t escaped him.

It’s over before he even gets a chance. Your feelings for Mattheo have always been there, and maybe it was delusional of him to think that you getting jealous over him and flirting all night meant he had a chance. But he really believed that your feelings might have changed.

“I can’t say that.” You nearly whisper, and Mattheo looks like you’ve just slapped him.

“Because you have feelings for him?”

His question hangs there, thick with emotion, and you can see the way his eyes search yours for an answer.

Theo doesn’t get to hear your answer because, as you move to get past Mattheo, you catch sight of him, and your face crumples with the weight of emotion, the glimmer of unshed tears evident in your eyes. A wave of concern washes over him, and before he can fully process it, you push past Mattheo, urgency guiding you forward. When you reach Theo, you wrap your arms around his neck, burying your face against his shoulder, and he instinctively pulls you closer, wrapping his arms around your waist.

“Can we leave? I don’t want to be here anymore.” Theo agrees without any hesitation. He glances up at Mattheo, who scoffs in clear irritation, their eyes locking for a brief, tense moment. Theo gently grasps your hand before guiding you through the crowd and to your dorm.

please please please consider reblogging or leaving a comment! it keeps me motivated to write, and reblogs help to spread my work 🤍

[rainrot4me]

TW: Overstimulation, sexual torture, vibrator, feet?

A/N: In my brain, Jack can't become overstimulated. He just... rages.

𐚁₊⊹

Jack regretted his decision from the moment he made it.

It was his own fault, curiosity tugging at his interests to land him tied to his own desk chair, heaving for breath.

The demon was more of a traditional fucker, using his own devices to make you both feel good. He deemed his claws, tongues, and dick good enough to please you, so why would you need more?

So, when your mysterious toy appeared as he was kissing along your neck, he should’ve known better than to ask. Should've known better than to question what could be so good about a buzzing little wand.

But now here he was, claws tearing into the leather of his chair as you sat on his desk, pushing your foot against the vibrator strapped to his cock. The rumbling was driving him insane, feet digging into the hardwood as he hissed, the rope you had found tied surprisingly well against his limbs.

“Fuckin’ turn it off…” He snapped, hips digging up into your foot as you pressed harder, his length aching and sensitive to the touch. You smiled, your legs straightening to push up, and the demon’s hitched whine sent chills through your body. Strings of cum decorated his lower abdomen, staining the waistband of his jeans tugged around his thighs. "I get it- my turn now-" He jumbled, clenching his jaw. He had already come more than he wanted to, balls aching and cock swelling with sensitivity, the toy relentless.

Shaking your head, you smiled, pressing your toes down to get a better press on the toy. "Every time we have sex, I always end up crying because of how rough you are. I think this is a good repayment." You chirped back, your other foot pressed on his knee to widen his legs, shifting him further into his desk chair. The demon growled, eye sockets tensing and squinting with every jerk of his cock.

Jack kicked his feet, trying to angle his hips away but could not. The vibrator was tugging at some guttural feeling, some instinctual reaction he knew he wouldn't be able to handle, especially you. "Y/N-" He groaned, head falling back against the back of the chair as you slid your foot up and down his length, stimulating his cock to push precum from the tip. The toy was achingly sweet, the demon feeling his grasp on himself slipping the more it strained him. He was going to cum again, and he didn't know if he could restrain anymore.

You watched carefully, his cock twitching and writhing as he whined, Jack's claws tearing shreds of leather from his armrests as he felt his cock pulse, head shooting up. "Y/N-" He snapped. He was so close, the toy making him reach orgasm a lot faster than usual, but it messed with his senses, messed with his urges. He didn't know what was happening, but the sensations in his gut told him the frequent cumming was tricking his brain into a forced rut.

His brain repeated the same sentence... 'Grab them, fuck them, eat them, breed them, take them...'

Strings of cum were whipping from his cock, the tip red and angry as he gnashed his teeth, sharp tips cutting into his lip. Jack felt like he couldn't breathe, his senses becoming too full and stimulated as he watched your face, vision swirling between clear and unfocused.

That's when he lost it, your little smile flipping the internal switch he was so desperately holding onto, letting himself fall apart.

His jaw went loose, the demon's shoulder craning in and jerking his body, growls and whimpers echoing from his throat. "Fuck..." He snapped, the thick black substance leaking from his eye sockets doubling, dribbling down his cheeks and onto his shirt, dripping from his chin.

You kept your foot still, the vibrator continuously rumbling and jerking his cock, but it was almost like he couldn't feel it anymore. His attention was too focused on his slack jaw, his mouth hanging open as you watched his sharp teeth gleam, seemingly extending and contorting in his mouth, desperate for something to latch onto. Likewise, with his claws, the nails well-torn through the leather and desperately grasping in your direction, digging at the rope snugged onto his wrists.

"Jack...?" You questioned, letting your foot slip from the toy and onto his legs, leaning forward. Your boyfriend looked dazed, body aching and twitching as the toy rumbled, thighs clenching with every shock. The demon urged you to take the bait when his tongues finally slipped from his lips, lulling and slithering against his jaw, collecting the black liquid dripping onto his clothes. You watched, leaning closer and closer, curiosity tugging you in.

You felt the warm claws gripped around your throat before you heard the rope snap, the demon's body propelling on top of yours and shoving your back down into the desk, the wood cracking. "Jack!" You shrieked, pressing your hands against his face as his mock tears dripped onto your face, running down your cheeks. The demon just laughed, sharp teeth gleaming as he snapped, nipping at your skin. "What? Little thing doesn't want to play anymore?" His chest heaved, panting against your skin as his fangs gleamed, hungry and ready.

His voice sounded deeper too, more grumbled and primal, possessive. His claws sunk into your skin, their length doubled as his hand wrapped around the entirety of your neck, a gasp ringing from your lips before abruptly snapping off. "So cruel..." Jack tsked, pursing his lips as he ran a digit down to your jaw, pressing against your flushed skin. "You were so mean to me..."

Apologies rang, desperate hands pushing against his chest as the vibrator was long forgotten on the floor, the toy still buzzing as you felt a swelled cock rutting against your clothed crotch. "My turn." He chuckled, leaning down towards your face to swipe one of his tongues along the side of your face, circling your ear and sending chills. You whined; legs forced to separate as you glanced down, the base of Jack's length already swelling. A forced rut. The ribbed cock, red and angry, hanging heavy between his legs was evidence of that.

"Fuck." You whimpered, watching the length bob and grind against you, your thighs aching and abdomen fluttering with every press of his hips. Something about ruts just made Jack so much bigger, his body converting into this thing like he really was becoming a demon. You'd done it now for sure.

"Open up, little thing," Jack growled, jaw hanging open as his tongues swirled together, pressing against your lips and forcing their way into the warmth of your mouth, aiming to fill your throat. You gagged, whining when you felt your pants forcefully shagged off of your thighs, the demon humming his eagerness into your mouth.

"I'll show you how to really cry..."

[cressidagrey]

Stars all aligned - Chapter 12

Summary:

If there was one thing that both Azriel and Zahra Archeron had in common, it was that they were both very good at blending into the background.

They just never thought that their family were going to be the ones who never saw them at all.

Warning:

I'll keep the warnings, even though there is no outright mention in this part: Bashing of like...every IC member? Especially the Archeron Sisters, discussion of chronic pain, discussion of Infertility, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Underage Prostitution, Underage Rape/Non-con, Implied/Referenced Sexual Assault, Accidental Baby Procurement

If any of this triggers you or makes you uncomfortable, please, take care of your own mental health and don't read it.

(Lovely dividers thanks to @sweetmelodygraphics)

"You need to tell Rhys," Cassian told them seriously.

It was the last thing Zahra wanted to do. Only closely followed by talking to her sisters.

"You do it," she said, more of a jest than an actual request. But gods knew, her guts were actually twisting themselves in knots at the thought.

Cassian just shrugged. "I'll do it," he said drily.

"No, I'll do it," Azriel disagreed. "You are my mate and Azalea is our daughter."

Zahra swallowed at that claim in his voice.

Our daughter. It sounded as natural on his lips as breathing, sending a bolt of something through her that she didn't know how to define.

"I hate you," she said half-heartily and Azriel chuckled quietly, pulling her against his side.

"No, you don't," Azriel said and the cheeky note in his voice and the smirk on his lips had her heart flutter all over again.

The shadows seemed almost restless, twisting around his shoulders and fingers, curling around her hair…Their baby girl stirred a little, from napping in her arms, and Azriel's arm around her waist tightened almost...almost instinctively.

"We can't keep hiding you two away at Rosehall forever," Azriel said softly as he pressed a kiss against her hair. Zahra swallowed.

"Not that I'll protest," Esmeray said brightly. "You'll always be welcome here."

And Zahra loved Rosehall. She loved Esmeray. She loved it here...but there was a part of her that stupidly ached for her little cottage, for bringing Azalea there and making it a home for the three of them. It wasn't a grand house but it would be theirs and somehow that would be worth more to Zahra than anything else.

Home. The word send a pang through her.

Gods, she wanted nothing more than to make the cottage a home for their family. She wanted to move there and to forget about everything else.

Except…There was no forgetting the rest of her life or her family.

Azriel's arm tightened around her waist when she sagged against him, almost as if he knew what she was thinking, as if he was anticipating her thoughts and reactions.

She swallowed. No. There was no way around it. And she knew it.

Her gaze shifted to the baby in her arms. Azalea. Their baby girl.

She tried to shake off the sense of protectiveness that was taking hold, a feeling so...so foreign to her and...powerful and frightening all at the same time.

She...she wasn't a mother, she didn't know how to do this...

Azriel's free hand came up to her chin, tilting her face until she was looking at him.

He didn't say a word, just looked at her like he could see the panic and uncertainty that was clawing at her, wrapping itself around her insides until she was gasping for breath.

"Don't worry," he said quietly, firmly, his hand still cradling her chin, his eyes never leaving hers as if he was making her focus on him and his words. "We'll do this together."

"Rhys is going to kill us both," she told Azriel weakly. Cassian just snorted.

"He's not," Cassian disagreed. "Why are you always so pessimistic?"

Zahra just stared at him. Why indeed. "Because experience has taught me to expect the worst of things," she snapped back.

Cassian had the grace to wince.

Azriel's hand left her chin to twirl a piece of her hair around his fingers, almost...almost absentmindedly, as if he wasn't even aware of doing so. His arm was still wrapped around her waist, his fingers lazily tracing circles into her hip.

"You have a secret weapon though," Cassian said brightly.

"And what is my secret weapon?" she drawled back in disbelief.

Cassian pointed at Azalea. "That," he said like it was a perfectly logical and obvious explanation.

Zahra just stared at him. 

Cassian gave her a look. "She will make him go all soft and emotional," he said, clearly finding the idea somewhat amusing.

"He's going to turn to mush," Cassian promised her. "Ever since Feyre and him had Nyx, Babies make him go all soft and gooey," Cassian added. "And sappy," he said after a moment and she couldn't hold back a snort. "First rule of war, use every weapon in your arsenal," Cassian said seriously. "And who could possible resist you," he cooed at Azalea, who was blinking at him sleepily, waking up and cuddling into Zahra. “Not the big bad High Lord of the Night Court, not him.”

Azalea's eyes were wide as she stared at Cassian, like she couldn't quite believe there was another person fawning over her.

Zahra rolled her eyes at Cassian. "You are ridiculous," she said unimpressed by his antics.

"He's right," Azriel agreed though, much to her surprise.

"Of course I'm right," Cassian said in a cocky voice, too distracted by Azalea to truly notice who had agreed with him.

Zahra just huffed in annoyance,  as she watched Azalea grab a hold of one of Cassian's fingers, pulling it close. It was...cute, she had to admit that much.

Cassian...he was a big strong warrior. He could be gruff and rude and grumpy and a downright ass most of the time. And now...now a tiny baby maybe half the size of his biceps had him wrapped around her little tiny fingers.

Azalea giggled when she tugged at another one of his fingers, her tiny fist clenching around it, and Cassian's expression softened.

"Besides, I am there too," Cassian cooed at her. "Yes, I will be. Rhysie can't possible find fault with you, can he? No, he can't."

Azalea didn't seem to mind the baby voice Cassian was using. If anything, she seemed to be delighted by it, almost trying to pull the finger into her mouth to gnaw on it.

Zahra almost, almost snorted in amusement.

"I would be careful, " Azriel warned, "She has a tendency to bite." Cassian actually drew hand back in horror.

"Don't be a coward," Zahra said dryly and now she did chuckle quietly as Cassian sent her a glare, a look of...almost betrayal in his eyes.

"Are you telling me I should let her take a chunk out of me?" he asked, offended.

"If you want her to love you, you should," Azriel said drily, and Zahra snorted.

That just earned Azriel another glare. "That...I...she..." Cassian spluttered, then looked at Azalea, who was still looking up at him wide-eyed, as if almost waiting for him to offer his finger back.

Zahra bit her lip to keep from laughing.

"Your parents have a horrible sense of humour," he told Azalea drily.

Azalea just reached out a tiny hand for him again, her fingers opening and closing in a grabbing motion...and of course Cassian caved instantly, giving her his finger to hold again.

He was whipped. Completely and utterly whipped.

Zahra just pressed a kiss against her daughter's hair.

"How do you want to do it?" She asked Azriel softly. How did he want to deal with Rhys?

Azriel was quiet for a moment, the shadows curling tightly around his shoulders as he thought. Then he let out a sigh, his grip around her waist tightening a fraction. "The sooner we do it, the better," he said grimly. "We'll do it tonight."

"We'll do it now," Cassian corrected. "I'll ask him to come here and he will. We'll have a talk with him outside. And only if he manages to keep his temper...we'll let him anywhere near you," Cassian promised her.

"You don't need to do this," Azriel said, his voice tight.

"Yes, I do," Cassian disagreed. "Besides, if there are sides, I am picking the one with the cute baby!”

That did little to calm Zahra, even as she pressed another kiss to Azalea’s curls. 

“I am still there too,” Esmeray said drily from the kitchen. “I can be pretty fierce!”

***

To say that Amren had her own opinions about everything that had gone down while she hadn’t been there...well, that was an understatement.

Rhysand had heard about her opinion in great and graphic detail as she had stalked through his house towards his office.

Now Amren stood in front of the floor to ceiling windows, her arms crossed over her chest as she glowered at him, looking very much ready to punch him in the face.

And he didn't doubt she probably would.

Rhys just leaned back in his chair and waited as she kept up the silent treatment. He knew she would explode eventually.

"You're angry," he said flatly. It was a statement, not a question.

"You are leaving the Night Court vulnerable," Amren spat.

He almost winced at the venom in her voice. "How so?" he asked, trying not to sound defensive, trying to keep his own annoyance in check.

Amren sent him a look. She knew he knew what she was talking about. "Your spymaster is gone," she pointed out, her voice sharp and angry as she finally whirled on him. "Your General and his mate aren't even on talking terms at the moment. Your wife and her sisters are having a fight that has the potential to result in a civil war."

"It's not a fight," Rhys said with a sigh. It wasn't. Not truly. 

And it wasn’t going to end in civil war…probably. 

"It's close enough to one," Amren snapped and there was no denying that. "So how are you going to fix this?" she demanded.

There wasn't anything he could fix. How was he supposed to fix this? How was he supposed to...

He could never take away what happened to Zahra. He could never fix the scars that she would carry from it for the rest of her days...scars that maybe weren't visible to the naked eye but there non the less.

"I don't know," Rhys admitted, the words almost getting stuck in his throat.

The most powerful High Lord in the History of Prythian…and yet when it came right down to it...absolutely powerless for this. 

He didn't know.

The muscles in his jaw twitched as he swallowed, trying to get a hold on himself. On his thoughts. On his emotions.

It had brought up memories that Rhys himself would rather forgot. Things that he never wanted to happen even to his worst enemy, that had happened to him…

Amren had left in a snit after that, and quite frankly he didn't fault her. 

Right now it felt like their family was fracturing down to the center in multiple different directions.

And Rhys himself hadn’t been helping things either.  Azriel’s harsh words had made that very clear to him. 

Had made it painstakingly clear what they had done to Zahra, how they had treated her…and while Azriel hadn’t put it into so many words…his dark eyes had been accusing and harsh and…and the guilt had been gnawing at Rhys ever since then. 

Zahra hadn’t been the only one who had been treated horribly by their family. 

Azriel had been treated no better. 

Absolutlely no fucking better and it wasn’t…

Rhys couldn’t fault Azriel one bit for taking his mate and getting them both away from surroundings that had grown the worst sort of toxic for them.

They could be lucky that that was all Azriel had done. That Azriel had only told them all off for their behaviour towards Zahra…that he hadn’t just grasped his mate and took her somewhere else entirely. 

He could. Rhys didn’t doubt for one moment that if Azriel wanted to disappear and take Zahra with him…he could. And they would never see them again. 

It was a fucking miracle that Azriel hadn’t let the mating instincts get the best of him and went out for retribution…hadn’t slaughtered his way to the Human Lands. 

At this point Rhys could hardly have blamed Azriel if he had.

His hands clenched on the armrest.

Hell, Rhys himself wanted retribution. Wanted justice for a 15 year old girl that had only tried to keep her little sister safe. 

He wanted to slaughter the man that had dared to put his hands on Zahra.

He knew he wasn't the only one. He knew that once Feyre got over herself enough...once she understood and accepted that right now, Zahra didn't want to see her... that would be next on her list as well.

It was strange almost, the anger, the frustration that coursed through him. He was so unused to feeling it towards Feyre that there was almost a part of him that wondered how he should handle it. What could he even do?

The sharp mental tug that told him that one of his brothers wanted to talk to him broke him out of his thoughts.

Cassian? Where are you? he demanded immediately.

Rosehall, Cassian's response came. There was a slight edge to it, something sharp and almost...defiant. Come to me. We need to have a chat.

Rosehall? Cassian was in fucking Rosehall?! 

I thought we agreed to give Azriel some time to cool off, Rhys snapped right back. It was the least he owed his brother.

There are some...extenuating circumstances, Cassian said softly.

Extenuating circumstances. The words had Rhys straightening, his whole body going tense.

What kind of extenuating circumstances? he demanded.

The kind you need to see for yourself.

Rhys growled, the sound low and deep. You had better have a damn good reason for this, brother.

A very good reason to go against Rhysand’s order. 

I do, came the terse answer. Just get over here. Now.

It was the sound of absolute certainty in his brother's voice that had him doing as he demanded.

He was going to Rosehall and he was going to figure out what was the hell was going on.

It took him only a few seconds to winnow there.

He almost stumbled when he landed on the gravel path, his wings flaring out behind him. Rhys took a deep breath and tried to calm himself, tried to get himself under control again.

Then he turned and...froze.

He had expected Cassian waiting for him. He had not expected Azriel being there too.

There was something about Azriel’s body language that screamed tension. It was in the set of his shoulders, in the way he stood, in the way he carried himself.

But he was there.

He was willing to see him.

And he wasn’t wearing his fighting leathers, even when two siphons were sparking dully on his hands. 

It was more than what Rhys deserved.

His gaze slid over to Cassian, who was casually leaning against the house, almost as if he didn't have a care in the world.

That was a stark difference from Azriel.

But Rhys didn't take that obvious casualty for meaning that everything was well, for one moment. Cassian was good at diffusing tension.

"Azriel," he said, his voice weaker than he wanted.

"Rhysand." 

Azriel didn't seem to be in a forgiving sort of mood. Not that Rhys could fault him for that. The use of his name, the way it sounded almost cold from Azriel’s lips, was like a slap in the face.

Rhys flinched back, the muscle in his jaw clenching as he forced himself to hold Azriel’s gaze.

He wouldn't look away.

Even in the dim light of the evening, Rhys could make out the shadows curling tightly around Azriel. They were agitated, restless, snapping at empty space as they twisted around Azriel's limbs, as if preparing to strike.

"I..." The word felt lodged in Rhys’ throat, like he was trying to cough up something that had got stuck there. Azriel just raised an eyebrow at him.

Cassian pushed himself of the wall, his hands slipping into the pockets of his trousers as he sauntered forward.

"How...how is Zahra?" Rhys asked finally, forcing the words past the lump in his throat.

"She's doing well," Azriel answered, his voice cool.

It was something. It was more than he deserved. "I am sorry," Rhys blurted out.

The apology made the shadows around Azriel flicker, something almost akin to surprise flickering across his brothers face.

It was the first sign of something other than anger he had seen so far and he took it as a good sign.

"You should be," was all Azriel said.

"I know," Rhys said quietly. "I..." He paused again, drawing in a shuddering breath. "I am sorry," he repeated. "Not just for Zahra. We fucked up. I know that," he told Azriel seriously. "But I am sorry for how I behaved with you, too."

He had expected that Azriel would say something at that. He expected a cold reply, some snarky comment, or a scathing dismissal.

What he did not expect was a small nod. It was a small gesture, almost too small to be seen, but it was there. And it was progress.

Rhys let out a breath that he hadn't even realised he had been holding, his body relaxing.

It...it was a start.

His eyes darted over to Cassian, who was watching them with a carefully neutral expression on his face. A sharp contrast to his usual demeanour.

"It's a start," Cassian said after a moment, almost as if he had read Rhys' mind. Then he jerked his chin as if to say keep going.

Rhys turned back to Azriel and raised his chin almost like he was offering himself up, forcing himself to meet his brothers eyes again. And there was still so much anger in them, a sort of cold fury that was different than the hot anger Rhys was used to. It was the anger of someone who knew that they were right.

"But please," he said, a pleading note to his voice now that he hadn't even tried to hide. "Please, let me at least...let me try and make it up to her, to both of you."

There was a tense pause, Azriel just staring at him, still looking rather cold and distant. Rhys almost held his breath, waiting for his brothers response.

"There is something you need to know," Azriel said.

Rhys let out a breath of relief when his brother finally spoke, his shoulders loosing some of the tension.

“Alright,” he said, bracing himself for whatever it was that Azriel was about to say.

"The shadows kidnapped a baby." 

Those words didn't seem to sink in at first. Rhys just stared at his brother in disbelief.

"...I'm sorry, say that again?" he asked, his voice sounding almost strangled.

"The shadows abducted a baby," Azriel said again, slower, enunciating each word slowly.

The words sounded just as strange the second time. Rhys just stared a Azriel, trying to process...to figure out what the hell his brother was trying to say.

"A baby. A Baby?" Rhys asked. "Where did they find it?"

Azriel's body seemed to grow even more tense, if that was even possible.

He glanced at Cassian, some unidentifiable communication passing between them. Rhys' eyes flicker between them, trying to make sense of what was going on.

"She, not it." Azriel finally snapped. "She's Illyrian. And the shadows found her in my father's dungeon."

Rhys' brain stalled on the word dungeon. It took several seconds to process it, to understand what Azriel just said.

Then his whole body went cold, a horrified look on his face.

"You don't mean..." he said, his voice a mere whisper. "She's Ruben's daughter," he realised.

Azriel's half brother. The one behind the scars that covered his brother's hands.

Azriel just gave a terse nod, his lips thinning into a tight line. The muscles in his jaw were clenching again, his hands curled into fists at his side.

It wasn't hard to figure out where the anger was coming from. A child. A baby, who had been locked up in a dungeon.It was the type of knowledge that made his stomach curdle, that made the rage start to build. But he forced it down, forced himself to keep it in check.

"How did the shadows find her?" he asked finally when he was sure he could trust his voice.

"Zahra asked them to keep an eye on Ruben," Azriel answered evenly. "Then they found out that he kept his bastard daughter locked away in the dungeon. The wards were corrupted. So they just…took her and brought her here."

"And...the...the mother?" Rhys asked, almost afraid to hear the answer to that question.

"Dead in childbirth."

Rhys winced a the words, his stomach clenching. An orphan then, her mother having died in childbirth. That poor little girl...

"Do we know her name?" he asked quietly, almost dreading the answer.

Azriel's face went blank, his voice utterly lacking in any sort of emotion. "She didn't have one."

The thought made something in Rhys' chest tighten, a cold fury starting to run through his veins.

He was fairly certain that if Ruben was standing in front of him right now, he would have tried to rip out his throat out without a second thought.

"How long had she been down there?" he asked, knowing the answer would make things even worse.

"According to the shadows? All her life," Azriel said bitterly. His eyes were cold, his lips pressed tightly together.

"All her life," Rhys repeated, the words echoing in his head.

All her life.

Ruben had...Rhys had known a lot of horrific people in his life, had met a lot of monsters. But...that. He let out a breath, his hand coming up to scrub at his face.

"How old...how old is she..?" he said quietly.

"Six months," Azriel said, his voice flat. There was no inflection to it. No expression in his eyes.

Six months... A six-month-old baby. Locked up in a dungeon all her life...

It was a horrifying picture in his mind, one he was unable to get rid of.

He couldn’t help but see Nyx. Nyx. Nyx down in a dungeon. All on his own. 

He didn't want to think about what that must have been like for her... The sound she must have made in that isolated silence that had surrounded her. 

"I am not taking her back there," Azriel said, his voice diamond hard and fierce. "She'll stay with me and Zahra."

Rhys didn't even think to protest at his brothers words.

How could he? How could anyone look at this situation and expect the poor girl to go back to the man who had locked her up for her whole life?

"Is that what Zahra wants?" Rhys asked finally.

Azriel's eyes darkened, a muscle in his jaw twitching.

"It's what we want," he spat out, his words almost a growl. "Azalea is our daughter."

The fierce protectiveness bled from every single word. Rhys didn’t think for one moment that Azriel didn’t love her like she was his own flesh and blood. 

There was no doubting Azriel's conviction.

Azriel was deadly serious, and he would protect the girl he had claimed as his daughter with his dying breath.

Like a mother bear defended her cub. 

Rhys’ expression softened slightly, his shoulders releasing a bit of the tension. "I wouldn't expect anything else," Rhys said quietly."Azalea, you said?" He asked carefully.

"Yes," Azriel said, his eyes still glaring coldly. There was a hint of defensiveness in that word, a hint of caution, as if he was just waiting for Rhys to object against the name.

"It's a beautiful name," Rhys said finally, his voice softening even more. He could see the hint of surprise in Azriel's eyes at his words.

"You can see her," Azriel said suddenly, "If you want," he added, the words seeming almost reluctant.

Rhys blinked a bit, a flicker of surprise running through him. He wasn't sure if he had heard his brother correctly.

"You...you're letting me see her?" he asked slowly.

Azriel just gave a brisk nod, his body still tense. Cassian's eyes shot up in surprise, a look of absolute astonishment on his face. Then he turned to Rhys, his eyebrows raised, Don't you dare mess this up, Cassian warned him mentally. 

"I would like that," Rhys finally said finally, his voice slightly shaky.

Azriel studied him for a few moments, scrutinising him like a hawk. Then he gave a slow nod, his eyes not leaving Rhys for a second. "But if you do anything, and I mean anything to upset them,” Azriel said, taking a menacing step forward. 

Rhys could feel the threat hanging in the air, the promise of violence if he messed this up. His blood ran cold, his instincts telling him to step away from his brother.But he didn’t.

He met Azriel's glare head on, his chin raised in a silent challenge.

"I won’t," he said quietly. "I swear I won’t."

For a moment, Rhys thought that his brother wasn't going to believe him, was going to send him away again. Then Azriel nodded, the tension in his shoulders loosing a bit.

"Then come," Azriel said, jerking his chin towards the house.

Rosehall was warm and welcoming, and he could hear Esmeray's voice chattering softly as he stepped into the living room. Azriel’s mother was sitting in an armchair knitting. And then he saw Zarah.

Looking healthier than Rhys had seen her in months, her face having filled out some, dark brown hair in a messy braid over her shoulder...and curled around that braid were the tiny fist of the baby on her lap that she was currently offering porridge too.

The sight of her made his breath catch in his throat. She looked so...so unbelievably healthy. Happy even. Motherhood was agreeing with her.

His eyes lingered on the baby girl for a moment.

She was tiny. So tiny. A far cry from Nyx at that age…Pale with fluttering wings… Azalea looked almost fragile in her mother's arms, her small face scrunching up excitedly as she chomped down on the spoon. Rhys didn't think he had ever seen anything so sweet.

And then Zarah looked up and her expression shuttered.

Rhys could see the expression shifting on her face, the look of joy and contentment disappearing, replaced by something more guarded.

Rhys felt something sharp twisting in his stomach. THis was his fault.

Her eyes moved away from him, her body shifting to shield the baby somewhat from view. Rhys felt a pang at the action, the movement clearly protective and defensive. She was shielding the baby...from him.

Rhys’ heart ached with the thought, the feeling of guilt welling up in his chest. He deserved that. He knew he did. And yet...it still stung.

He forced a smile on his face, trying to make it seem as sincere as possible. “I’m happy for you,” he said, his voice soft. “You look well.”

The words seemed to have no effect on her, her expression remaining closed off and guarded. There was a hint of anger in the look she gave him before she turned her attention back to Azalea

The child squirmed in her arms, her little hands reaching out towards the spoon. Zarah just shifted her, rearranging the baby's position and offering her another spoonful that was hungrily eaten. 

Rhys couldn't take his eyes away from the sight. From the way Zarah carefully wiped a splotch of porridge off the baby’s cheek, how her expression had softened again while looking at Azalea..

And the baby...she was staring at him. Wide green hazel eyes...She could have passed as Azriel's twin. She was...so tiny. So fragile...yet she was looking at him with far more trust than he deserved.

He took a step forward before he could stop himself.

A sudden golden shield snapped up, surrounding Zarah and Azalea. 

The warning was perfectly clear: Stay away. He swallowed.

Rhys could nearly taste the magic, as Zahra fixed him with green eyes.

"If you ever treat him Azriel like that again, you'll have me to contend with. Is that clear?" Zahra asked him, her voice cuttingly sharp. "They are mine."

There was no fucking question what exactly she meant and he only inclined his head, staring at the golden shield that currently protected them. 

 He could see the magic pulsating faintly, the energy it exuded. She was...serious. That shield was strong.

He had never seen anything like that in his life. It seemed like the 3rd Archeron Sister that had been thrown into the Cauldron had come out of it with some kind of gift after all. 

He swallowed again, his gaze flickering from the shield to the baby.

"I understand," Rhys said quietly, his eyes not leaving hers.

Azalea was still looking at him, her little hands gripping at her mothers shirt.

Those bright hazel eyes were fixed on him, seemingly studying him, examining him curiously. There was no fear in her gaze, no uncertainty. Just simple curiosity.

She made a small noise as she looked at him, her tiny hand grasping at the shield, Zahra had wrapped around both of them.

"She's beautiful," Rhys said softly. "She is lucky to have you."

"No," Zahra disagreed fiercely. "We are lucky to have her."

Rhys' breath caught for a moment at the words. There was so much conviction in them. So much certainty. And...he didn't doubt her words for a second.

That baby girl...the look in Zahra's eyes, the protectiveness and the fierce love in her voice.

"I am sorry," he apologise softly.

Zahra's body didn't relax, her face still closed off and her eyes still wary. But she gave a slow nod, the corners of her mouth flickering into a slight frown for a moment.

The tension in the room was thick. So thick you could cut it with a knife.

Rhys found his eyes drifting back to the baby… And this time, Zahra loosened the shield so he could look at the girl more closely.

It went down with a shimmer of magic.

Just enough that Azriel moved to sit beside them on the couch...to take the bowl of porridge from Zahra and continue feeding his daughter who looked at him adoringly, gurgling happily.

Rhys could feel his heart clench at the sight. His brother was cooing at the small girl, a small smile on his face as he lifted the spoon to the baby's mouth.

She accepted it eagerly, chomping and giggling happily. 

Azriel's face...he was utterly enthralled, a look of wonder on his face as he watched the small girl. There was something...soft in his expression. Genuine joy at getting to feed the baby.

Rhys couldn’t remember the last time he had seen Azriel look so at ease. 

His brother was happy. There was no question about it. 

[halcyone-of-the-sea]

ooh im glad!!! so, expanding on that then..

how about price with a civvi wife/gf, and when they’re talking over the phone while he’s gone, she’s being kinda cagey and definitely omitting something, but he doesn’t know what. so when he gets back home she tells him she’s pregnant? really just a lot of fluff (and maybe angst? 👀 like about how his job is super dangerous and he might not come home, so he has fears about it?? bc your angst is so good it makes me sob violently /pos)

ive never sent a request before, so if this is too specific or something, feel free to whittle it down or toss it, i don’t wanna bug you lol

have a good day hal, love u!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Our Remains

Pairing: John Price x F!Reader

Synopsis: You disliked hiding things from John. Certainly something as big as this.

Word Count: 4.8k

Warnings: Pregnancy, allusions to breeding kink & unprotected seggsy time, morning sickness, angst, major fluff at the end

A/N: This was an adorable request, Anon!! Thanks so much for sending it in.

*I do not give others permission to translate and/or re-publish my works on this or any other platform*

You disliked hiding things from John. It not only felt like a betrayal of his unlimited trust in you but also a slap in the face for what you had built with each other. The both of you were always honest to a fault when it came to your relationship—like how a bird was loyal to the sky. It was an unselfish principle; a promise of pure love and devotion that transcended touch or given gifts.

You told each other things. Everything. Down to how much you had spent on groceries that day just because it was something to talk about and share; something that made you closer to one another even when you were apart. You told the Brit what you planted in the back garden—what shirt you were wearing!

But now you hold the ringing phone in your hand and for the first time in your entire relationship, you consider lying. 

Your eyes bore into the icon of John’s smiling face, head covered by a black beanie and beard tilted up softly. Affectionately, his name on the device had been changed to ‘Grumpy St. Bernard,’ but now the title made your lips go thin instead of the usual giggling reaction. No heat spreads over your cheeks; no excitement.

Just an overwhelming sense of dread.

The week had started just as the last three had. A special form of hell. At nearly six o’clock you would whip back the covers with all the fervor of a terrified rabbit being chased by a hawk; the taste of bile immediately snapping you to attention as the toilet acts as your commanding officer. 

You imagined John would get a chuckle out of that comparison, but when you’re hurling up your guts in nothing more than a pair of your boyfriend’s boxers and a tank top it’s hard to think about all that. The taste of bile was still lickable from your lips as the bathroom tile digs into your knees, ringing phone still in your palm. 

The idea of a pregnancy test slid into your subconscious in the first week of John’s two-month deployment, the tantalizing thought that was like a hook to a fish. You had pulled on the string, of course, and had instantly drowned in air. But you hadn’t taken one until now. Too nervous, perhaps. Hesitant. 

In your other hand, opposite of the buzzing phone, you held three positive pregnancy tests in a shaking grip. Pink and white plastic mock you from the corner of your vision; two double lines. 

John’s icon dims. 

You press the green circle in your panic, mouth opening and closing yet no sounds escaping. Would you tell him now? Later? Was it right to tell him about this now—when he was halfway across the continent? Fear overtakes your heart for no apparent reason. You didn’t want him to act rashly, especially when John could act so stubborn when he wanted to. 

He was always so concerned about you when he was away but you were concerned just the same. That man was the one who was getting shot at constantly, not you.

“Took you a while to answer. Trying to give me the slip, then, Sweetheart?” John’s gravelly voice helped slightly, making your heart still, even if for a short moment. You close your eyes and tilt your head down, lips quivering at the soft chuckle over the line.

God, you loved him so much.

Blue eyes furrowed in confusion at the silence on the line, the chilled Switzerland air sneaking inside John’s compression shirt as he stood on the hotel balcony. The sounds of gentle conversation twitch his ears from inside the room—the voices of the One-Four-One a dull mumble behind the half-closed sliding door. They had been playing cards before the Captain had easily slipped away to check up on you. 

He tried to call as often as he could. 

John’s hips shift, one arm crossed over his chest as the other presses the phone harder to his ear. Lips pull to a frown, beard bristles going with them, before the lines on the Brit’s forehead grow larger.

“...Love?” Naturally, a sliver of concern wedges itself into his ribs but it subsides when your calming voice spreads honey over the call. John’s shoulders fall back down. 

You breathe deeply, hands dropping the tests onto the bathroom counter with a small clack of plastic. 

“John,” forcing away the hitch to your words, you stare at yourself in the mirror, free hand sliding up to lightly rest over your collarbone as a soothing method. Your eyes are so filled with shock that it throws you off. “I…I wasn’t expecting a call so soon.” 

“Hm, been up since 0500.” the man grunts, looking out over the city and seeing the rising sun before asking softly with a deep-set brow. There was something about your tone…lids narrow at nothing. “Did I wake you?” 

“No, no,” You force a chuckle, having to take a deep breath before ripping your sights from your own reflection. The disgust was settling at you trying to avoid this. But if your own brain could barely process this right now, what gave you the right to tell John when he wasn’t here? “I’ve been up for a few hours.”

Licking your lips, you run a hand over your hair, glancing out of the ajar door into the master bedroom, pushing out bland answers for only the fact that you couldn’t think clearly right now.

Jesus, this was actually happening. 

You study the thrown covers from your morning rush to the bathroom, seeing the pictures on the nightstand and feeling the delicate atmosphere that was sparking—electricity between atoms. A silent moment of realization that everything down to the bare bones of your relationship was about to change. Blinking back to the tests, you dwell in the strange fuzz that took residence in the back of your mind. 

“What’s been going on?” Your voice isn’t right. Too tight. Too…nervous. Why were you nervous? “Everyone good?” 

The Brit frowns stiffly, shifting his feet again and sending a look back into the hotel. Hunching forward, John’s large fingers fix the position of the phone as his voice lowers, ignoring your question entirely. He doesn't want to jump to conclusions, but there were pros and cons to his line of work. 

Above all, he knew when something was up with you.

“Are you alright over there, Sweetheart?” Blue eyes rove the street below, “Feelin’ okay? You sound a bit stuffed up.”

Your heart lurches, quickly stuttering through an explanation of, “O-oh, I think I just came down with something.” The irony wasn’t lost on you. “A stomach bug,” you cringe, “I’m sorry, was it that obvious?”

The laugh that exits is less convincing than you thought it would be, but it does the trick. John sighs in relief, chuckling as he shakes his head.

“No need to apologize, Love…anything bad, then? I can bring some meds from Base when I’m back if you need me to.” He was still concerned for you, but knowing that you’d never lied or withheld the truth from him before there was really no reason to believe that anything else was going on. John trusted you to the end of the earth. 

The Captain rubbed at the back of his neck, cracking his spine as he bent back. It was still early and waking up on a hotel bed without you beside him was torture. John longed for home. Longed for you.

Back at the house, your face scrunches together. 

Bad? You wonder, saying absentmindedly that some medication would be lovely. Was this…bad? 

John had always wanted to have a kid—or, at least, he’d told you as much when he was above you, filling you to the brim and then doing it again a second and third time. Thighs quivering and eyes fighting to stay open through layered bliss as sharp pants rung in your ears. 

“Gonna get you pregnant…watch you swell up…c’mon sweet thing, you can handle another one, can’t you? Need to watch it take.” 

…But was that a true feeling or just a kink? You blank and realize you’d never asked him. More than that, though, was this what you wanted? 

“When do you think you’ll be home, John?” You speak softly, palm flattening over your stomach as you exit the bathroom and sit on the end of the bed, gut swirling but not in a nauseous sort of way. “I…I really miss you, y’know? It would all be better if you were home.”

The brunette blinks softly, lids peeling back in shock for a moment before a thin thread of guilt worms its way into him. 

“Kate said two months, Love,” John speaks slowly, the grumble in his voice trying to convey his unease at your strange behavior, “You know that.”

He’d explained his job when you both had gotten serious, how he would be gone for long periods of time, and the somewhat uncomfortable situations you’d be put in because of it. You’d agreed and never brought it up when John would have to leave in the small hours of the morning and disappear for months on end. It shocked him, really, with how well you adjusted but that was just how you were. One of a kind. 

There was no one else with whom John could see himself building a life—being buried beside in some nice meadow grave plot and turning to dust together. Growing a family with. 

John cleared his throat, tilting his head down slightly before pulling himself back to the present. 

“It’s bothering you that much, eh?” His brows furrow, “Are you sure you’re alright? I can call hospital and—”

“No!” You slap a hand to your mouth, halting your outburst as blue eyes go somewhat wide, jaw slackening. Taking a breath over the shocked silence over the line, you dig your fingers into your cheek before letting your limb drop. “No, John…I-I’m sorry I just…” 

Your voice quivers.

Don’t cry, don’t cry, don’t cry…

Eyes burning and nose twitching, you breathe heavily, mouth closing shut because you knew that if you say another word you’ll explode. You were shivering with cold sweat, scared and confused, and wanting John to hold you in his arms; whispering that it would all be okay into the shell of your ear. 

You force through a sob, “I’m just really scared.”

John tenses, one hand going to grasp the balcony with white knuckles. His mind goes into overdrive. “Scared?” the Brit prods, muscles going stiff and mind running, “What in the hell is going on?” 

Authority leaks into his tone, serious and deep. It made him nervous that he couldn’t see you right now—couldn’t stop the sounds coming from your mouth. Why were you crying? Has something horrible happened to you? Were you in trouble but were unable to tell him? John runs over your conversation again, every word and sound, as his heart races. He was wound up like a spring. 

From behind him, the conversation in the hotel room halts. 

You force your eyes closed, now up on your feet and pacing. Tears lightly patter to the floor. 

“John, I can’t tell you over the phone,” you admit, shaking, “that wouldn’t be…wouldn’t be fair to you.” Swiping at your eyes, you spread the salty liquid away from your lashes, sniffling; praying that he would understand. “But I really need you home as soon as you’re able. I don’t want to break up what's going on over there, it’s just really important. I don’t think I can wait two months by myself. You know I would never ask this if I didn’t need to.”

John’s jaw clenches, legs unable to stay still as your anxiety leaks to him. He’s nodding before he realizes you can’t see him, taking a deep breath to fill his lungs. 

“...I’ll see what I can do, then.” The brunette runs his hand over his beard pulling at the strands aggressively. What was so crucial that you can’t tell him over the phone? It was a secure line, John always made sure it was; yet, at the same time, that fact didn’t matter at all. If you needed him home so fervently—then he was coming home. That was that. “How long can you wait for me, Love?” He spares a glance inside. “There are a few loose ends that need to be taken care of here. Might complicate things.” 

You blink around the bedroom, hand wrapped around your middle and trying to run soothing circles into your skin. 

“I…I don’t…” John’s face softens, closing his eyes.

“Breathe, Sweetheart,” he whispers, “I’m comin’ home to you. We’ll get whatever this is sorted, yeah? I need you to be brave for me until then.”

Listening, you let the words calm you down, sniffling one last time like a kid who had fallen off the monkey bars before you let out a chuckle. John instantly follows his own advice when that sound wafts over the line. His shoulders fall back once more, silent sigh exiting.

“You said that exact same thing to me when I ended up burning that loaf of bread I was making—two years ago, was it? ‘Breathe, Sweetheart.’” Blue glimmers with love, cheeky tone growing. 

“Hm, nearly set the kitchen on fire, didn’t you? So much smoke I swore someone had set off a charge in the oven.” John doesn’t push you to answer him, though he’s more questions than anything else at this point. You’d said you would tell him when he’s home and he believes you. “Please, Love, at least promise me you didn’t burn the bloody house down, yeah?” 

A laugh strikes his chest, and he’s chuckling slowly in retaliation. 

“I promise, John.”

“Good.” You’re smiling for the first in what seems like ages, tears drying as the flood down your chin stops. You lick away the water stuck in the corner of your mouth when John grunts lowly, “I’ll tell the boys and inform Laswell. But I can’t say it’ll be less than two weeks.”

Nodding to yourself, you say, quietly, “Okay.” Your eyes fall to the framed picture on the nightstand—the image of John and you smiling brightly on your third anniversary. You’d gone hiking, both sweaty and dirt marks on your cheeks, but happy…always happy. Your veins pump blood faster. “I love you, John.” 

The final comment is tender; the words are more silk and soft furs than vibrating vocal cords. 

He blinks away the blush that lights his pale cheeks. John huffs, an infectious smile flickering over his face as his chest wells with affection. Acting like a bird preening itself, he smirks and says, “Well, you’re lucky then…I love you too, Sweetheart.” An exhalation echoes over the call as his tone drops, “Keep safe for me, eh? I’ll call to update tomorrow.” 

“I’ll be waiting.” 

When the phone is set down on the bed, tossed down carefully, you try to think over this situation more rationally. You wouldn’t say you were against this—building a family with John. In fact, if not him, then you don’t believe it would be anyone else. 

The Brit was the only man for you. You both knew the risks of having unprotected sex and in reality, you think neither one of you cared about the consequences. 

Nodding to yourself, you wonder how to explain this to him when he comes home as you get to fixing the sheets, one hand always drifting back to your stomach with a growing appreciation.

—

John jogged to his car in the underground parking garage, unlocking it with his fob as his bags are slung over his shoulders. He wastes no time chucking his belongings into the back seat, swiftly sliding into the driver's seat and slamming the door shut as the engine starts. His dog tags bounce on his chest, but he’s half convinced they move from the rate that his heart is going alone.

All through traffic his fingers are tapping against the wheel, grunting stiffly at red lights and shifting his hips. 

It had been three and a half weeks of fixing loose ends. 

“Fuckin’ hell, c’mon,” John huffs, one elbow on the car frame as his hand flattens over his lower jaw. The light slowly snaps back to green after a long minute. 

Pressing on the gas, the vehicle moves forward and continues until the familiar home comes into view on that quiet street nearly twenty minutes later. 

John barely parks the car before he hops out, leaving his bags in the back, and rushes to the door. Taking the key from under the doormat, his mind is focused on only you. He had been unable to stop his worry about you and your unnamed fear, watching the phone with every free instance he could. It had only grown as the days got longer, and no matter how much you assured him that you would be okay until he got back, deep-seated apprehension grew. He didn’t like living under a shroud, especially when it came to your health.

The key in his hand was inserted with a firm wrist and twisted, shoving open the door with a heavy shoulder like there was a cloud over his head.

“Love?!” He calls, not bothering to shuck off his boots before looking around the visible living room and foyer. “Where are you?” 

Long legs move swiftly as an utterance calls from the kitchen, barely taking the time to close the door behind him in his anxiety, “John?” 

The Brit immediately backtracks, skidding to a stop and turning with blinking eyes. His ears twitch at the sounds of dishes being dropped back into water, as his heart steadily slows at the sound of your beautiful voice calling his name. 

He rushes around the doorframe, feet stomping and hand catching the wall as you come into view, staring wide-eyed. 

Your digits are around the fabric of a dish towel, fingers dripping as John finally presents himself to you. You hadn’t heard him until he had called out, too preoccupied with your own thoughts to hear the lock click. 

But now it was like every worry you had was wiped clean at the sight of that gruff face; the hitch in his large chest. A smile slashes your lips after a moment of shocked silence.

“John!” You laugh, rushing forward, and the man lets his face soften—bringing you close to him as you draw near and trapping you in his arms. 

His breath spread out over the top of your head in a great sigh, grumbled chuckles accented by the way John’s great hands wrap around your shoulders. Fingers press you into a solid chest, digging through hair to let your ear twitch at the sound of his heartbeat. 

John doesn't speak until he has held you in his arms for at least three minutes, just pressing his face into your scalp and feeling your warmth against him. You don’t pull away either, breathing in his musk as it instinctually leads to your muscles loosening. 

Minutes later, the Brit pulls back slowly, gripping you by the shoulders and looking down into your eyes. His gaze filters over yours, taking you in before his lips meet yours in a brief yet deep kiss. You melt into it, hands going to grip his cheeks and spread throughout his beard hair, soft strands leaving you shivering when John’s thumbs rub circles into your flesh. 

He pulls back and you fight the tears in your eyes as he connects his forehead with yours. His optics shine with love, bleeding out like trapped stars; silver flecks of devotion and a blue the color of sea storms.

“What’s going on, Love?” John whispers, concern alight and raving as his grip goes to your waist, squeezing comfortingly. “I’m here. Tell me.” 

You blink slowly, lips going thin with tight brows. Swallowing through a tight throat, you nod. 

“Can you go sit in the living room, please?” Speaking carefully, you tilt your head and watch John get confused—his nose scrunching and moving his lips together. You run your thumbs over his cheeks and smile slightly, obviously nervous again. “Trust me.”

Though it wasn’t a question, John replies under his breath, “Always.” 

But still, he holds you, studying your expression and the whites of your eyes with stiff lungs. You were making him fear that something horrible was coming—something he couldn’t control. His heart begins to hurt, but he backs away from you, brows tight as he exits the kitchen and disappears into the living room. 

Taking down a swift breath when he’s out of sight, you fiddle with your fingers above your abdomen, looking down at your still-flat stomach. You knew it was stupid to worry, but how could you not? It wasn’t every day you just told your Lover you were pregnant with his child…

“John loves me,” you mutter to yourself, nodding and getting ready to go through with the plan you’d formed over the three weeks you’d been alone. “And he’ll love the both of us. I know he will.” 

Hand flattening over your stomach, you open a drawer with the other, pulling out a small cardboard box no bigger than a book. Fingers shaking, you lick your lips and feel the slight pull of a nervous, yet giddy, smile. Turning, you exit the kitchen and see John sitting with his nose resting above the clench of his fists, foot tapping. His head immediately snaps over when you come into view, hands falling to hang off his legs as the couch under him dips from his weight. 

You steel yourself and raise the box. 

“Here.” Placing it on the coffee table, you sit across from John in an armchair. 

He blinks slowly, eyes going small with curiosity. The man sends you glances through his lashes as he stares down at the object but he says nothing. Rubbing his beard with one hand, he reaches and grabs it carefully. 

Testing the weight, John is genuinely confused, clenching his jaw and feeling the material in his palm. 

“...What’s this, then?” He asks lowly, glancing at you with a raised brow and lines on his forehead. 

You put your intertwined hands in your lap, prompting with a tilt of your shoulders. 

“Open it.” Off put by your cryptic answers, John nods firmly, grasping the top of the box and pulling lightly, careful not to disturb the contents. It was strange to think, but he was honestly quite perturbed. 

What exactly was inside this box, and why had he been called home for it? He loved being here, no doubt, but the circumstances….

Blue eyes glimmer. You didn’t look overly afraid as you shifted in your seat, just plain timid—like the inside object would change something fundamental about his and yours relationship. 

John pops the top off and looks as you start talking before your throat threatens to shut you up. “I…I know it’s not a life-threatening thing to call you home for,” the man stills as if he was made of stone; a statue as non-breathing and pulse-less as anything, “But I didn’t want to tell you over the phone because that seemed so—!” 

Your voice is drowned out as John’s shaking fingers delve into the box, ears ringing. His fingers flinch off of three positive pregnancy tests and the soft fabric of the plain army green baby onesie that surrounds them; skimming slowly. 

“I found out the day you called and I said I had come down with something.” Your laugh is strained when it exits you, and you stare at the Brit hard, seeing his features utterly halt all expression. Thumbs digging into your skin, your tone drops, speaking slowly, “...John? A-are you okay? Say something to me, Love.” 

It’s only in that long minute of nothingness that you really start to get an all-consuming tenseness to your bones like a rabbit. 

Why isn’t he saying anything? 

John clears his stiff throat, blinking rapidly as he brings out one of the tests, dropping the box lightly to the coffee table with a dull thump. The twin red lines are ingrained into the softness of his retinas as the sun would be if you were to stare directly at it. 

Pregnant. 

His heart swells to an almost painful degree, blue eyes moving to look at you across the table and then dipping to your stomach. The Brit stands up slowly. 

Your lungs are tight, lids moving quickly with wetness growing in your tear ducts. 

“Please, John, what are you thinking—?” Large hands capture your arms, bringing you up as lips meet yours in a passionate and heart-stopping kiss. 

John’s limbs wrap around your hips, bringing you up into the air as gently as a bird, face parting from yours with a series of loud and genuine laughs. You snap your arms around his neck, shocked but not at all complaining as he holds you up with ease, twirling you around in a firm but ever-gentle hold. 

“You’re pregnant?” His whispers meet you, airy and deep with awe. It was like he was in his teens again, running around Herefordshire with his mates—his eyes shone with happiness; pure unabashed love. “Oh, truly, Sweetheart?”

Tears dribble down your cheeks at the sight of him glowing, beard peeled back in a large smile with wet eyes. Hiccuped giggles leave your lips as you nuzzle your face into his neck, the sight of him like this overwhelming. All stress leaves you in a millisecond when your feet hit the ground again. 

“Yes, John,” you sob, overjoyed, pulling back so you both can stare into each other's teary eyes as the Brits’ fingers go to shakily wipe the waterworks from your under eyes. His orbs flicker quickly, looking you over in an entirely different light. “You’re going to be a father.” 

He fights through a scratchy voice, “Me?” The tone is amused, but he can’t articulate how exalted he feels to hear that. A father…him? It was more than he could have ever asked for, and, even better—John whispers out, “You’re going to be a mum.” 

You kiss him, multiple quick pecks that he returns through shared joyous chuckles.

“I didn’t want to tell you over the phone,” the confession meets the air as one of John’s hands travels to cup your flat abdomen, fingers flinching over the fabric of your shirt to sneak under. You laugh and shiver at his calluses, as his blue eyes are so soft they could be compared to butter. “And I couldn’t wait two months.”

“Christ, Love,” John lays a kiss on your forehead, needing to be as close to you as possible. You can feel his heart through his chest, and you know yours isn’t any better. This was far more than you could have hoped for. He mutters against your skin, “I’m so glad you didn’t. This is bloody amazing news—I want to be here for all of it.” 

Sea storms lock onto your face with a grunt, “You’re so lovely. Perfect, yeah?”

His warm hand still rests under your shirt, and you doubt it’s going to leave anytime soon.

You feel your cheeks heat and you smile bashfully, heart about to explode.

“You are.” John reiterates. “You’re so fuckin’ perfect, Sweetheart. I’m so happy.” 

The air is ripe with tenderness, a soft state of being that just keeps getting better. John had silent tears dripping down his face, blinking to clear them and not letting you leave his hold for a second. 

“Oh, John,” you whisper, digging your fingers into the back of his shirt, looking up. “Me too, Love.” 

While the glee is nearly physical enough to grab, there is a moment of hesitancy in the Brit. He was gone more times than not for work; put into situations that could leave him going through bodily harm. You didn’t deserve that stress—didn’t deserve to sit at home with a swelling stomach just watching the door and wondering if you’d have to become a single mother. You had a child in your womb. His child. Both of yours’ child. 

A family that you both had made.

John swallows and says to you seriously, without an ounce of hesitation in his blood, “I’m telling Laswell to pull me out,” you blink up and listen, letting him continue as his press on your flesh gets even more prominent, nodding to you, “I’m not missing this—not putting you through that worry. Two years, then I’ll head back in. We have enough saved, I give you my word you’ll want for nothing.” 

Blue eyes flicker down, and a small mumble so tiny it nearly disappears hits your ears. You almost start sobbing again. “This is more important. You both are more important.” 

There were few moments in your life that you think you’ll remember when you are old, weathered and wrinkled, but this you tell yourself is one that you will carry to your grave. John and yours’ grave. 

What remains behind, you ask? Simple.

White bones entangled with an eternity of deathless worship, and the generations that will come to lay flowers on the headstone.

TAGS:

@blueoorchid, @jxvipike, @revrse, @shuttlelauncher81, @bruhhvv, @kittiowolf210, @aerangi, @spikespiegell, @ghost-with-a-teacup, @1234ilikecowsthanyoumore, @uberraschungg, @neelehksttr, @shoe1412,@jemandderkeinenusernamenfindet​, @pukbadger, @omeganixtra, @nanialis, @gills-lounge, @voidinfernal, @sukunas-left-nut-sack, @untoldshortsofthefandoms, @batmanunicorns523, @icepancakes, @copiasratscheese, @besas-stuff, @marytvirgin, @misfne, @halfmoth-halfman, @lothiriel9, @anna-banana27, @jade-jax, @cl0wncxre, @emerald-valkyrie, @michirulol, @330bpm-whiplash, @lora21, @bespectacledhuman, @wolfyland07, @dilfsaremyfavourite, @astronaunt2009, @shmaptin, @levietc, @kk19pls, @semieitabby, @thriving-n-jiving, @cringe-kats, @n1choles, @gaychaosgremlin, @johnpricesprincess, @haleypearce,

[acid-ixx]

FOAMING IN THE MOUTH AT THE FIRST CHAPTER!! the way you wrote dick still imagining reader as a small child because thats the only time he remembered them as is SO GOOD. i am living for the angst and desperation in this fic, and i can't to see how each of them react to the situation, especially damian because he and reader have the sane blood. when dick texted reader pretending everything is cool and like he didn't ignore them for thirteen years is a such a good concept. i can only imagine reader screaming on the other side because of opening the message accidentally lol. i cant stop thinking about how the reader's reaction to the text message would be like, finally moving on and healing and then boom! the trauma resurfaces and dick having the audacity to reach out while reader is having a breakdown, confused and scared for what'll happen next. sorry for filling up ur inbox!! i wrote a lot more than i thought oops take care of yourself and remember to takes breaks!!!! <3

reader when the self destructive impulses kicks in because of a family they have long gave up on finally started to notice them the moment they have moved on: 😧

no because dick grayson would infantilize you to the max. not in a "you're a toddler" way but rather he sees you as his innocent baby that he failed to guide and protect. he truly wants you to see him as the same person you view him as years ago, not wanting to be any less in the eyes of his baby bird <3

he'll admit that the things he's done is a shit move, constantly denying you when his entire schedule is flexible for the family but you.

so he should've expected to be blocked, but he just can't stomach it at all that his baby bird didn't even hesitate to cut him off in an instant! it just furthers his protective nature to a t and if it wasn't for damian suddenly appearing by the door, dick would've spiraled into insanity deeper.

what i mean by insanity is; he wouldn't sleep for days tracking you down, then he'll take you away from your wretched home and bring you back rightfully where you belong.

meanwhile, on the other side of gotham, you'd be on the verge of a panic attack, nearly splurging your guts out and trying to calm yourself with relaxation techniques. you quite literally couldn't walk straight without stumbling to the bathroom because holy shit imagine your brother whom you haven't nearly talked to for years suddenly called you! with cryptic messages no less that never implied your family's years of neglect towards you. i would be smashing my phone across the room, to be honest.

the moment he's turned a full yandere, damian would be really deep into the "blood is thicker than water" ideology when it comes to you. he'll apologize to you, glare plastered on his face and all, but compared to the others, his apology sounds so genuine yet condescending at the same time. you both are of the same blood, save for the fact that you share different mothers but that doesn't matter— he should be the favorite.

not dick, not jason, not tim, or anybody else for that matter. and he'll be shoving it in your face that he's the youngest so you should be obligated to baby him. and even if you dare make a point on how he had called you immature for your age multiple times, damian would find a way to guilt trip you and it would always fucking work. to avoid further spoilers, i wouldn't want to expand on his character traits but damian would be the worst type of pain in the ass, near the levels of dick.

[gojoidyll]

chant the same old mantra

gojo x wife!reader pt. 3

i just wanna be loved. stop destroying what is left of your heart by constantly thinking about things that have broken you.

pt.1 , pt. 2

taglist

@acornwinter @shokosbunny @tw0fvced @thesunxwentblack @roscpctals99 @mononlogue @meg3mis @lailamatepeque @iamrgo @crookedtimetravelheart @jsprien213 @avaliniko @mischeif-maker @theepitomeofswag @akio-ayashi @saihar4s @dann-acalle @yozora7154 @spookysoowpprince @iluv-ace

some say "no blogs found" when i try to tag them

The moment that Ijichi got off the phone you had immediately punched him right in the gut, “idiot! Why did you call Gojo?! I have everything under control!”

Which was the truth, sure at first the situation did start to get out of handle, but by gritting your teeth and using all the strength you had left you took out the enemy the second that Ijichi got off the phone.

“I- I’m sorry-“

“And now he’s coming here. Do you realize how mad he will be once he realizes that he came here for nothing-?!”

“I wouldn’t say it was for nothing,” Gojo said.

His sudden voice and appearance made you groan both inwardly and outwardly as you turned to look at him. His body seeming to materialize out of thin air.

He… teleported himself here?

“Gojo.”

Ijichi looked between you both and had instantly felt the tension, so he politely excused himself as he went to go get the car, and once he was gone you crossed your arms over your chest.

“I thought I said not to come for me?”

“You did, but I chose not to listen.”

You saw how he pulled his blindfold off, slowly as if to see your reaction. You gave him no indication to caring.

“As per usual. You never seem to listen. At least not to me.”

“Y/n, I-“

You stopped him, “you know, maybe this is a good time to finally talk things out. Honestly, it has all been weighing on my mind recently, and then Megumi talked to me…,” you trailed off before looking at Gojo. And you really looked at him.

Despite being older now, he still looked like his old self. Strong, worried over his teammates, and unbelievably cocky. But you also saw the memories that came with it. The unspoken words od I love you that gradually turned to hate just because he was forced to marry you.

You wondered, silently, that if he wasn’t forced, then would your relationship have been normal?

Would you both have gone through an ordinary relationship as boyfriend and girlfriend before he eventually pops the question one lazy afternoon when you’re both sitting on the couch watching a Digimon rerun.

What wishful thinking.

“Gojo. This isn’t working out. Not anymore.”

His lips parted as if he wanted to say something, anything, but in the end, he was at a loss for words. It wasn’t until he saw you turn to walk away that he stopped you.

“So what now?”

It wasn’t a question you were expecting Gojo to ask you. He didn’t seem like the type to care. At least, not now anyway.

“Divorce?”

The word slipped out of your mouth before you could stop it. A mere suggestion in hopes that he agrees.

“No can do.”

You frowned at his dismissal as you finally turned back to him, “and why not?”

“Our family agreement, remember? In order for us to get a divorce, you have to have a kid with me.”

You thought back to the arrangement meeting, to the wedding, to how he hadn’t made a move to touch you at all. You thought back to the agreement. How could you possibly forget?

Well, then again, it was easy too when Gojo made you want to forget…

“Fine, we can adopt-“

“Has to be ours, wifey.”

You pursed your lips at that, your anger slowly starting to take root.

“Whatever, so once that happens, you’ll let me go?”

He watched you intently as you spoke those words. Let you go, huh? He felt like he never had you to begin with. All because of his own doing no less.

“Sure, anything you want…”

You watched him carefully before sighing, “fine then, I guess I’ll see you back at the estate?”

“Our estate.”

“Not for long,” you said simply before hearing the honk of horn only to see Ijichi pull up with the car, “now, are you coming, or are you going to teleport again?”

Gojo was surprised that you even asked, but he smiled nonetheless and agreed to join you in the backseat. He didn’t expect anything like this to happen today.

But now he had a new goal to work towards, and that was to not give you a baby.

[yanf4iry]

don’t you think, pet? ♡

wc 827

yandere(ish)! capitano x afab bratty! reader

subtle yandere themes. hints at friends with benefits. jealous! capitano. aggressive! capitano. slightly bratty reader. hair tugging. ‘pet’ used a couple times. unprotected sex (pls be safe!). afab autonomy. kinich mentioned. its only short so there isn't much to tag lol.

"what did i tell you about wandering around with all those other boys? hmm?" capitano mumbles, his breath tickling up against the sensitive skin behind your ear, hands trailing down to hold you in place; even his subtle grip being strong enough to do so.

"i've told you already," you sigh, rolling your eyes slightly, growing slightly tired of his possessive and jealous behaviour. "i was just hanging out with kinich, i don't see him like that."

"and i've told you already," capitano trails off, mimicking your previous choice of words, "i don't care how you see him, because i see how he looks at you," he continues, grip getting tighter as his voice progressively turns into a low-toned growl.

he was thankful for the current predicament you were both in; the dining table in front of you made it so easy for him to push you and bend you over, whilst his tall figure was shadowing behind you, making sure there was no room for you to try worm your way out.

and so here you are, chest and face pressed against the cold, wooden surface. capitano gutting as he starts to fumble with your belt and the buttons on your trousers; his slender fingers making work of them.

"i don't like you 'hanging out' with him," he proclaims possessively, "and i also don't like you wearing these trousers, they make my access to you so much harder," capitano adds, huffing as he finally managed to yank them down along with your freshly damp panties.

"you can't control everything i do, you know?" you answer back, voice oozing with disobedience, before gasping slightly at the feeling of the cold air on your slick folds. "you're not my boyfriend."

that comment made him suck his breath in sharply, growing more annoyed by the second. no, he wasn't your boyfriend (yet) but that doesn't mean you weren't his, and that doesn't mean he wasn't going to put you in your place every time you acted out.

"i don't care," he grits through his teeth. "i'm the one that's going to teach you some manners since you obviously don't know how to follow orders, pet."

you'd be lying if you said seeing him like this didn't turn you on; because it did. good god, it did. you knew exactly how to get on his nerve, and you fucking loved the reaction you got from it. capitano was well aware you did these things on purpose as well, yet somehow fell for it every time and couldn't help but let his jealousy get the best of him.

without even giving you time to think, his fingers were trailing against the most inner parts of your thighs, teasing the sensitive skin around there, causing you to tremble subtly. "shit.." you breathe out.

"your lack of patience is aberrant," capitano scolds, slapping the inside of your thigh with some force. "and to think i thought you had manners; you'll get whatever i want to give you, when i want to give it."

you could hear the echoes of clunking and fidgeting once more, and that was when your wetness was met with the tip of his cock, him teasingly brushing it against you; a mewl being forced from your lips. "patience.." he whispers, leaning forward so his mouth was hovering just behind your ear once more.

the thickness of his tip parts your folds, covering himself in your wetness. you sigh in exasperation, pushing yourself back against him. capitano gripped your waist bruisingly tight in one quick motion, halting your actions almost immediately. "have you gone deaf?" he growls, fingernails digging into your skin.

"you'll get whatever i want to give you," he starts up, a low grunt leaving his lips, "when i want to give it to you."

"or i can leave.." you trail off, mischief riddled in your tone before a playful smirk appears on your face; even though he couldn't see it due to your face being pressed against the table, it was apparent from how you spoke. "maybe.. maybe kinich wants to give me what i-"

you weren't even able to finish your sentence, capitano pushed himself up against your entrance and pushed himself in, causing you to moan. a noise he much preferred over you threatening him with running off to another man for pleasure.

"did you really think i'd ever let you finish that fucking sentence?"

his thrusts were harsh, almost violent in a way as he claimed what he believed. no, what he knew, was his. "don't you ever let me hear anything like that nonsense leaving your mouth, ever again? you hear me?" he questions, hand moving to your hair, tugging on it tightly.

"about time i fucked some manners into you.." capitano grunts against your ear, nipping at it slightly with the sharpness of his teeth, enjoying the choked-out moans escaping your gaped lips. "don't you think, pet?"

"because you're mine. only mine."

[lovelyyandereaddictionpoint]

Hello, I hope your having a nice day, can I request Yandere 1st Years + Grim (Platonic) with a Komi Reader? (From Komi can’t Communicate)

Reader’s known for being incredibly beautiful, intelligent, athletic and elegant in everything she does, however she has crippling Social Anxiety and ends up scaring everyone away with her ‘mean/scary’ look so everyone tends to avoid her (When it’s actually herself that’s nervous since she doesn’t know what to say)

Except for Ace, Deuce and Grim after they spent time with Reader in the mine, they discovered her anxiety she wrote it out so now they’re mostly the ones who do the talking for her and try to help her reach her goal of making 100 Friends in NRC, even though they both think that’s a ‘weird/bad goal’ because this IS NRC

Reader loves cats, so she spoils Grim and Lucius (The latter likes laying in her lap and even follows her around) with pets, treats and affection and helping her friends with studying since she gets perfect marks

How would they react to hearing Reader’s voice for the first time? Not to mention have Reader tell write out that she made a friend all by herself who visits her dorm at night and does nightly walks (You know who it is)

Komi-San Reader | Yandere Twisted Wonderland

You’re quiet and intimidating but not because others find you scary. The exact opposite, they’re obsessed. You’re athletic, you’re smart, you’re beautiful, you’re kind, and the list goes on. Without so much as opening your mouth, the school is at its hands and knees all for you. Little do they know about your silent struggle, not like your dearest first-year friends. More than anyone they know how hard you work and if their hearts could overfill with love for you it already has.  So imagine your stalkers' friends; reaction to you’re never heard before voice:

Ace Trappola

“Aw man, (Y/n) I can’t begin to explain how much of a pain he is! With his moodiness, we’re not going to win the game.”

“...”

“Don’t say that, I am great but not that great.”

“...Y-you c-can d-do it!” 

He plays 10x better 

All while running on his excitement and embarrassment

“Whoa, Ace! W-were you holding out on us!”

Everyone is floored that he’s suddenly just doing so well

He’s keeping your quiet cheers to himself 

Replaying it in his head

He will teasingly ask you for a recording even when you cutely shake your head

“Oi oi don’t get all shy now, you were doing so well!”

He does circle back having already written down the names of those who turned their heads

If they’re so inclined to hear your voice in a roaring crowd 

Then they should be alright with their ears no longer working 

He’s being merciful when he does just this

And if you mention any mysterious friends, he’d no doubt try to follow up on that same treatment

Deuce Spade

“M-maybe being an honor student was too high of a goal.”

You shake your head

“Ahh I appreciate it, (Y/n) but if I’m going to flunk again I’ll be in trouble. Both with Riddle and my mom, I just can’t measure up. ”

“You…are a good student.”

He blushes 

“G-g-g-g-good j-job (Y/n)!”

He knows how much this is taking for you to try 

But he just can’t keep it together 

He’s among the first to hear your precious voice

He has to be the only one

He doesn’t know what this feeling is but he doesn’t want to share

It especially rubs him the wrong way when you mention a mysterious friend 

He decides to wait it out

See who this new friend he’s going to gut he has to meet

Epel Felmier

“Grrrr I can’t stand it! Why can’t I be taken seriously? I just hate my face!”

“...”

“Don’t hafta lie ta me, (Y/n)! I know I’m not handsome.”

“...I….th-th-”

“Huh?” 

“I think you’re handsome.”

“Aw shucks, (Y/n)!”

He definitely wasn’t was expecting that

You’re just the sweetest as he predicted

He already keeps the notebook you’ve lost+ gone through with your written words

And the apple cores he lovingly retrieves from Ramshackle’s trash no doubt cultivating whatever ends up growing from them

He avoids the impulse to tear his book open at the mention of a new friend 

Well I hope they like a poison-apple

Jack Howl 

“I have a magift practice later on…are you still going to come?”

You nod your head

“T-thank you, I’d appreciate your support from the stands.”

When he says that he doesn’t expect you to actually whisper anything out

“G-go Jack!”

His keen ears pick it up and suddenly he’s breezing through obstacles like never before

And of course, he did his mate practically cheered him on

It makes it much earlier to replay that encouragement when he’s fighting for your honor his ownership of you

No doubt Savvannclaw is filled with your admirers

But some are a little too bold

So leave it to your mate to take action first

And while he’s at it he might as well guard your home more intensely

Sebek Zigvolt

“WHAT A MARVEL HUMAN! YOU’VE TAMED ALL THE FERAL FELINES ON CAMPUS!” 

“...”

“WELL FOR A HUMAN IT IS DECENT WORK! PERHAPS YOU DO HAVE–”

“C-can you please be quiet?”

“...?....!..Y-you think y-you, a mere human, can tell me what to do?!” 

Yes you can, having the loud half-fae go down two whole octaves was a feat

And he keeps replaying the moment in his head specifically the way your lips moved

Burning hot all over he’s not really listening to anyone for the next week month

But once he’s broken out of it he’s determined to repeat the miracle

And it seems it works best if your alone?

Then he’ll be sure to chase off the gaggle of scum+ admirers who you claim to be friends with

And he thinks nothing of a midnight friend…that is if you’re alone with them than that’s completely unacceptable

Grim

“Henchhuman! Everyone is soooo mean! Why doesn’t anyone like me? I know I’m so cool and maybe that’s why–”

“I like you.”

“Well of course you w–W-wait did you speak? T-t to me! Whoopee, I’m going to tell everyone the great Grim is who you spoke to first!” 

He runs off to do just that 

Bragging to anyone who would listen

He has to dodge a lot of assassination hits that day

But it gives him the content whenever that icky feeling comes up sometimes

And as for your ‘Hornton’ friend he’s seen him and next time he comes around he’ll boast all about his greatness and how you spoke to him

[absolutebl]

This Week in BL - Weird Strange Warmth, Thailand

Organized, in each category, with ones I'm enjoying most at the top.

Sept 2024 Week 2

Ongoing Series - Thai

Jack & Joker (Thai Mon IQIYI) ep 1 of 12 - Oh it’s fucking great. What a fantastic start! It’s a fun cast too. I adore seeing all of the familiar faces. This is a lot more fun than Kidnap (sorry GMMTV, do better). I mean both shows are serving the same kind of concept but with completely different energy. I love that War is playing phi in this series. I think it suits him much better. In fact. I really like these rolls for this pair. I think they’re gonna knock it outta the park. I am so happy this is good. I wanted it to be good. And it’s good!

Monster Next Door (Thai Thurs Gaga ) ep 8 of 12 - Oh no! He read the journal. No snooping! Well I guess they needed to get some tension for these 2 from somewhere, otherwise they are too good to each other. Meanwhile, I’m not sure about the sides in this particular series. I don’t hate them. The laundry jealousy moment was pretty well done. But I'm not sold, either.

Addicted Heroin (Thai Tues WeTV) ep 5 of 10 - I forgot that we were already on the ICONIC kidnapping section of the narrative. I miss Gu Hai's OBEY sweatshirt from the original. (Someday I will own that sweatshirt.) Hero should at least be wearing an OBEY T-shirt. Frankly I miss the harshness of the original too. Johnny Huang was just so massive, August doesn't have the physicality to carry this scene off. Nor does Thailand have the guts to push it into the creepy obsessive territory that made the first version so thrilling to watch.

The thing about the original kidnapping bit was we could feel Gu Hai's vibrating need to possess overriding everything else (including his sense of humor and frustration with himself). Gu Hai KNOWS kidnapping was an over reaction, he KNOWS he is being absurd, he just doesn't care. Because he doesn't just want to fuck Bai Luo Yin he wants to consume him.

We didn't get any of that from Hero. Hero, as a character, just isn't edgy enough to carry off a kidnapping, he's been softened too much in this new Thai form.

And then... An around the back of head not-kiss? Interesting choice. (Checks to see if BoomPeak are hanging out nearby.) Is that because the actor is under age? We in that head space for this whole show? (Pun intended.) Not sure how I feel about any of it.

It’s a much milder confession this time around, because it’s Thailand, but it’s still warped. So I’m still here for the weird strange warmth of this damn show. I did laugh a lot during this episode. 

Kidnap (Fri YT) ep 2 of 12 - Oh I am very much enjoying this.

"You’re the worst kidnapper I ever ever met" is an apt accusation.

Battle of the Writers (Sun YT) ep 7 of 12 - I kinda enjoyed the little side romance story (wealthy writer intellectual + poor local salt-of-the-earth boy = Love Seaing all over my damn screen). It came outta nowhere but... okay.

I honestly have no idea what’s going on with this show. But the kisses are nice. And I pretty much like all of the couples. It’s wild how disjointed it is but simultaneously how pretty. It’s like Star Hunter got hold of Mame’s budget and aesthetic. 

I Saw You in My Dream (Weds Gaga) ep 9 of 12 - Boyfriend era to the max. Production is still ignoring the whole "dreaming the future" POINT OF THIS SHOW.

The Trainee (Sun YT) ep 11 of 12 - Jane is VERY COOL. Like tay-style cool… as it were. I like their dynamic when they're given one to play with. It’s the rest of this show I don’t enjoy. 

Live in Love (Sun Gaga) ep 2 of 5 - It cute. Bit odd but cute. I like the language play, of course. It’s an interesting pair to watch flirt because it’s all language play so that's fun but otherwise, I'm not convinced.

Ongoing Series - Not Thai

The On1y One (Taiwan Thurs Gaga) eps 7-8 of 12 - This BL doesn’t drink from the water bottle to show off its neck. It quietly hands you the water bottle and expects you to understand that is not an act of generosity but of polite distancing. It's about the delicacy of the messaging, and the way themes are conveyed with such nuance.

This story is entirely about the two of them figuring out about each other, and then trying to be what the other person needs based on that information. It means they (and therefore we) are on this journey of discovering affection together. It's brilliant.

I must talk about the physical acting of these two for a second. That scene where they’re fighting over the book and then fall into the pool. That was one take. That’s amazing. These two are really fucking stellar not only at acting but hitting their marks. And let's be clear, that is NOT the same thing. I bet they both have stage training.

Define irony: watching two abandoned kids counsel their respective parents through abandonment issues.

Sugar Dog Life (Japan Sun grey) ep 6 of 10 - It is stupid cute and utterly charming. They are total boyfriends. It’s just that one of them wants to be and one of them assumes they already are. Actually, nevermind boyfriends, they’re married.

I Hear the Sunspot AKA Hidamari ga Kikoeru (Japan Weds Gaga) ep 12fin - It made me whimper a lot because they’re both hurting so much. But in the end it was... fine.

Summation

The compassionate story of a college kid going deaf and the one boy he can hear. I love this manga and was let down by the first adaptation (Silhouette of Your Voice), so I was expecting a lot from this BL. I expected the soundscapes in this one to be fantastic, and the were, but I didn’t expect the filming to be something special too. But it really is. The acting is great too. But the story? It was just fine. They spent far too much time on the build to a relationship, then wallowed in their separation and a problematic girl character, when they should have been showcasing Taichi's character arc and his capacity for connection. Perhaps Japan should pass this one off to Thailand, It's a soft story centering on "food as love" so they might do better with it. I am, yet again, disappointed. 8/10 but I want to give it a 7/10

First Note Of Love (Taiwan Mon Gaga) eps 9-10 of 12 - It’s fine. it’s cute. I enjoyed getting some backstory. More of the sides, please.

Seoul Blues (Korea Fri? YouTube) ep 7 - Honestly, why don’t they just call this entire series The Cheating Diaries and have done with it? I’m only watching it because there’s basically nothing else from Korea right now. But I’m generally mad about it. Including the fact that everybody is so pretty and the acting is so good in the series, but the stories are so terrible.

It's airing but...

The Hidden Moon (Sat WeTV) ep 1 of 10 - This is a supernatural romance (my ghost boyfriend trope) by Violet Rain (I Feel You Linger). A man is hired to write an article about an old mansion in Chiang Mai being converted into a café. He sees the ghosts of people who died at the mansion, falls in love with one of them. Was substantially recast. I loved IFYLITA except the ending so I think I'll let this one run it's course you can tell me if it's work tracking down... if they managed to land it. I have my doubts.

Happy of the End (Japan Tues Gaga) - A boy is disowned for being gay, dumped by his boyfriend, and ends up in a dysfunctional co-dependant relationship with his would-be kidnapper. We were due for another messy JBL and it's exactly as expected. I do not like it at all. And ya know what? There is plenty airing. DNF 

In case you missed it

The Time of Fever (Korea iQIYI & Viki) 6 eps - Side couple from Unintentional Love Story, HoTae & DongHee, return for a spin off backstory show.

It started out fantastic. And it was a relief to have a good Korean BL finally back on my screen, even a high angst one. But I did spend a lot of time trying trying to figure out whether they’re going to rehash or reboot from the previous series. Are we in Between Us territory or Don't Say No or (heaven forbid) To My Star 2?

None of the above, it turns out.

This was a pure prequel about lost first love. As such, it has no real finale beyond what we got in ULS. Which, for this pair, wasn't satisfying. Putting my disappointment over this aspect aside, it is enjoyable on the strength of the characters, actors, and chemistry (if not story). Yes I said chemistry, the kissing is fantastic, sometimes KBL can do that. This one featured the "teach me to kiss trope"!!!! Plus language play. Both favorites of mine. It is all angst, ache, repression, and miles of subtext. It did fudge the ending by not skipping forward and over the events in ULS to depict what happened next (what, no year long time jump when we actually need it, Korea?) It's a worthy companion piece, but should be watched BEFORE ULS for maximum satisfaction, and even then you're going to be left feeling like HoTae & DongHee's relationship was never adequately discussed or depicted in order to achieve resolution.

The little cameo of my baby in ep 5 was much appreciated. But the motorcycle should’ve been set up a little bit more. Of course I wanted it to be about them getting together after the events in the first series. But this was all backstory from start to finish. And while it was good backstory, it wasn’t ultimately satisfying for these characters. Still it’s a good little series. 8/10 

Meet You at the Blossom (China) - I'm eating crow, binging the fucker, and live blogging. It's just taking me some time. This isn't really a bingable show, not for me anyway. It's A LOT to take all at once. No new one this week.

4 Minutes (Gaga) Ended - Spies reported in to say the ending was not-exactly-unhappy and mostly lackluster. I'm torn over whether to watch. My natural disinclination to binge, meets my dissatisfaction with wishy-washy, is going up against my love for fabulous high heat and pretty pretty men.

Mitsuya-sensei no keimakutekina ezuke finished and it’s reported to be solid. Age gap treated with respect. I'm curious, so I'll check it out. Not doing very well on binging and catching up but it's on the docket...

Next Week Looks Like This:

Upcoming BLs for 2024 are listed here. This list is not kept updated, so please leave a comment if you know something new or RP with additions.

Still Coming Sept 2024:

9/15 Love Sick 2024 (Thai Sun iQIYI) 15 eps - Remake of the original. I'm scared too.

9/15 Bad Guy My Boss (Thai Sun Gaga) 10 eps - Assistant to a player boss who is in love with that boss decides to quit to save himself. The boss then makes a move. (A gay What's up with Secretary Kim?)

9/17 Love is Like a Poison AKA Doku Koi: Doku mo Sugireba Koi to Naru (Japan Tues Netflix?) 10 eps - Lawyer and a con artist meet at a bar, pair up, fall in love.

9/28 Teenager Judge (Vietnam Sat YouTube) ?? eps - oh I don't know just Ba Vinh doing his thing with pretty boys again.

THIS WEEK’S BEST MOMENTS

Love a teach me to kiss, teach me to fuck, whatever moment. (I Saw You In My Dreams sides)

Not gonna lie. I laughed. Addicted.

(Last week)

Streaming services are listed by how I (usually) watch, which is with a USA based IP, and often offset by a day because time zones are a pain.

The tag BLigade: @doorajar @solitaryandwandering @my-rose-tinted-glasses @babymbbatinygirl @babymbbatinygirl @isisanna-blog @mmastertheone @pickletrip @aliceisathome @urikawa-miyuki @tokillamonger @sunflower-positiiivity @rocketturtle4 @blglplus @anythinggoesintheshire @everlightly @renafire @mestizashinrin @bl-bam-beyond @small-dark-and-delicious @saezurumurmurs

Sigh, Tumblr in its infinite wisdom doesn't like too many at-ings.

[amurotoorudesu]

how to kiss someone

kudo shinichi x male reader

suggestive theme, kissing, bottom male reader, switch male reader, top shinichi kudo, switch shinichi kudo, curse, making out, reader is a fboy

____________________________________________

"w-what...?" the (e/c) eyed boy with glasses looked at his best friend with confused face.

"teach me how to kiss someone." said the black haired boy with dense look and flat tone.

(m/n) shook his head, positioning his glasses, wondering what demon possessed shinichi that he randomly asked this question.

or rather a request?

he didnt know either. (m/n) looked at shinichi again with frowned eyebrow.

"why do you want to learn that?" he can see the blue eyed boy's cheek slightly turning red and quickly averted his gaze to look at other things.

"do you... perhaps want to kiss ran?"

shinichi quickly turn his head around and look at (m/n) with blushed but annoyed face.

"i-i just... i dont want to disappoint my future lover!"

"by not be able to be a good kisser?"

"w-well... i-i mean... you definitely a good one, remembering you often kissed plenty of girls and guys."

and (m/n) nodded without hesitation.

"but are you seriously want to learn this so you could kiss ran?"

(m/n) observed the blue eyed boy's reaction and chuckle.

"pfft— as if you have the guts to kiss her"

"j-just shut up and teach me!" 

(m/n) rolled his eyes and told shinichi to get on his bed after talking on the side of the bed.

shinichi was getting nervous, because after they changed position, (m/n) keep on looking at his eyes and not his mouth, considering the (h/c) haired boy habits about looking at the others mouth and listening to them.

"okay, so first one, you seduce the person." 

(m/n) slowly lean into shinichi, putting his right hand onto shinichi's cheek, carresing it as he kept on getting closer.

"but since you can already seduce ran, maybe we can skip this part, yeah~?" the glasses boy grinning, making shinichi's face turned red and heart beating fast.

"second, you can tease the person by giving them little pecks"

before (m/n) lean and show shinichi how to do it, he pulled his glasses with one hand, letting the detective to see his rare face without glasses.

the detective was mesmerized, looking at the white pale skin and those tired eyes without the glasses, the slightly flushed face and those plump lips.

fuck... 

"loving what you see~?" 

realized he went spacing out while looking at (m/n) with lovestruck face, he just huffs and looked back at the glasses with challenging gaze.

"just teach me already"

(m/n) smirking and he lean onto shinichi, his lips met with shinichi, giving him little pecks and closing his eyes.

on the other hand, shinichi feels like hes slowly flying through the cloud nine, the feeling of (m/n)'s lips on his, and how the (e/c) eyed teased him by only give him short kisses making him eager.

he want to kiss (m/n) so much

"dont forget to close your eyes and breath through your nose"

(m/n) cut their kiss, panting while he get close to shinichi.

both of them didnt realize they were already so close, (m/n) sitting on shinichi's lap and their hand on eachother waist.

"third, once you and the person get comfortable, just make out, tongue and biting is really fun on this part"

they both lean onto each other, hitting those lips while (m/n) insert his tongue and shinichi give (m/n) small bite on his bottom lips.

sounds echoes through the room, they should be grateful because there was no one at (m/n)'s house because they're kinda being loud, whining and whimpering.

the makeout lasts for about two minutes, after they done, (m/n) put his head on shinichi's shoulder, hiding his red face on the crook of the detective's neck.

"that was fun" said the (h/c) haired boy.

"how's my performance?"

"good, you might need to have another practice though."

shinichi kissed the glasses boy on his pale neck, making (m/n) shiver.

and right when (m/n) was gonna get out of shinichi's lap, the black haired boy picked him up and threw him on the bed, caging (m/n) with his arm from running away.

now it's shinichi's turn to smirk, looking at (m/n) like the (e/c) eyed boy is his prey.

"you said i need more practice, right? mind if you're the test subject now~?"

and (m/n)? he looks at shinichi with kind of terrified but excited eyes.

i leave the rest of them to your mind.

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a/n : omg my first debut fanfic 😦😦 written in rush lmao, maybe the explanation wont be 100% true cz im a virgin both on the lips and ass, i accidentally fell asleep when i write this so forgive me, also english is not my first language

[seelie-buddy]

Hello, i hope you're having a good day...

Can i request genshin impact character (hybrid) like gorou, tighnari to do something like 'animal' instinctly.

If you add another character it's okay too...

Peculiar Traits

summary : some interesting characteristics of Tighnari, Gorou, and Ganyu that highlight their wondrous heritage

contains : just the characters using their unique traits to keep you away from harm's way ; fluff ; gn!reader, this drabble is written in second person

word count : 500

It's etched into Gorou to protect those he cherishes, being the general of Watatsumi's army. So when matters relate to you, of course he's going all out to ensure your well-being! His gut feeling is almost always accurate, and he does everything in his power to keep you away from harm's way.

If you're going some place dangerous, he will see to it that someone escorts you, or would himself accompany you on your trip. If there's any trouble that plagues you, just say the word, and he'll be ready to help.

If you were hanging out with some person Gorou didn't have a good feeling about, turns out they did actually have foul motives. And when things go south during expeditions, you know that Gorou will be there to watch your back.

Things like these brings you to fully trust the general, and you've learned to always keep in mind his warnings.

Tighnari is one to be cautious, and his sensitivity to sound and smell only helps him ensure your safety. He will be especially sure to keep an ear out for any potential threats everytime you accompany him on his patrols.

The forest may feel homey to those who have resided in the rainforest for a while, but it doesn't mean that it is without its dangers; the remnants of the withering, wildlife, and monsters need to be accounted for.

But with Tighnari by your side, you needn't worry! You can always put your utmost trust in him, and his understanding of the environment; the way he recognises danger from the sounds often unheard by others, and his knowledge regarding both the flora and fauna are unparalleled.

Any disturbances in an immediate proximity never goes unnoticed by him, and his reactions to said disturbances are swift; the lack of birds chirping has him alerted at the presence of a predator. Or when the polluted stench is in the air, he is quick to steer you away from the upcoming withering zone.

Ganyu is half-qilin, half-human.

She's calm, and reserved by nature; that's what being half-qilin grants her. Her sereneness is just like the soft flurry of snow in winter, or like the cool breeze on a summer day. She's always willing to lend you a hand, assist you in all manners possible, and merely her presence is all you need to relax as a smile grows in your face.

She is half-qilin, and it reflects in her traits.

Ganyu is half human; it shows in those moments of impulsivity. If someone dare speak ill of those she respects and cherishes– especially you– and they may as well be prepared for her (albeit supple) wrath. She will see to it that they will apologise and refuse to spout such nonsense again. It is in moments like these that you see that she does, in fact, possess emotions and feelings beyond that of tranquillity.

Ganyu is half-human, and it reflects in her traits.

a/n : I hope this was what you were looking for, anon!! No, seriously, I really hope I didn't misunderstand what you were asking for;;

p/s : A little ramble about my thoughts on this:

I didn't really come by the opportunity to write for Ganyu, and I believe she's underrated!

As for Gorou, he resembles the dog breed shiba inu, and apparently dogs (or just animals in general) have a very good sense of danger, whether it be people or things!

I've seen a lot of people relate Tighnari to fennec foxes (because of the ears) but his lore states him to be a descendant of Valuka Shuna (also called Tighnarians) so it's hard to place any specific traits on his species, given he's the only one we know of his kind