#because it's hilarious and i am a goblin

[ryderdire]

The thought that were probably closer to Deltarune chapter 3 releasing then we are to when chapter 2 did it’s literally wild I could be playing chapter 3– 5 this time next year and I know that doesn’t sound like it’s close but you have to keep in mind, it’s been THREE years relatively a year is not that much compared to 3 to 4 and that’s just like it could’ve already been out for months by then who knows I certainly don’t

[esmiara]

Idk if you’ve seen this couple but it’s two husbands and one is blind- anyway the not blind one does little pranks on the blind husband and he keeps putting these little penguins everywhere plz I beg I need this with soukoku- the look on Chuuyas face would be so silly!

I do know about them!! They're such a cute couple, I love watching those little pranks, it's so wholesome everytime!

Dazai doing this kind of thing would be hilarious. So this poor Chuuya has been attacked by an army of Odasakuman! Where did he even get all of those...?

Now because i am a very sane person, i obviously did an unnecessarily nice render on this one ahah. Furthermore, here is a version of Chuuya with a golden halo because of the holy fridge in the back. Don't ask. It looked like it would fit and i needed to feed my inner chaos goblin.

And because i am still a very sane person, here is a whole AU idea i came up with because of this one ask. Do you imagine a disabled soukoku AU? That would be great actually. I do picture Chuuya becoming blind because of inner damages due to the use of Corruption. On his side, Dazai was... well, acting like the usual Dazai and by not caring enough about his own body, he lost an arm in the process. He loves to annoy people with his fake arms though.

[sylvan-librarian]

RE: Nissa’s Retcon

* * *

About once a month, I get a comment on one of my posts saying something along these lines

“Uhhh, you left out the part where Nissa was a fascist!”

“Nissa was more interesting as an elf-supremacist, imo.”

To be perfectly frank, I think both of these points are stupid and not worth my time, but just to give these posters the benefit of the doubt, I’ll assume they mean well and respond to them, once and for all, this way:

To address the first point, you’re right: in my posts celebrating Nissa and the journeys she has taken, I do tend to leave out material that was retconned. This isn’t entirely true, however, as I wrote an entire essay about this on my Tumblr page, which I doubt people slipping into my comments to post “gotcha!” have bothered to read. But anyway, to assume the best of these posters, let’s take a brief look at this retcon. Outside of a few brief blurbs in the “Duels of the Planeswalkers” video game and her 2009-era character description on Magic’s website, the “racist Nissa” characterization comes entirely from the In the Teeth of Akoum novel from 2010. And yes! In this book, Nissa is a hilariously stupid racist (frighteningly like real racists, imo). However, many aspects of this book were retconned in Nissa’s Magic Origins reboot. To note, in the 2010 novel, Nissa has no idea what the fuck Akoum even is and lets herself get led there by Sorin and Anowon. In the reboot, we learn that, among many other changes, she went to Akoum previously in her life, as that journey is what led to her sparking. Either way, post-Origins, many aspects of Teeth are questionably accurate at best. It’s quite safe to assume that with how horrified Nissa is when she sees Lorwyn elves hunting goblin children for sport that that particular aspect of Nissa’s personality (white supremacy) is no longer a part of her characterization.

For the second point, this one is just crazy, man. I don’t know y’all come up with this stuff. I don’t even know how to address this politely. Keep in mind that I am not by any stretch saying that Nissa is now a perfect cinnamon roll that never did anything wrong ever. Nissa is at fault for not trusting Sorin and setting the Eldrazi free. This is a decision that forever will, and should, haunt her. In the newer lore, she still distrusts vampires and outsiders in her youth because of how she was raised, and this is wrong of her. But Nissa does not distrust them because she thinks she is somehow morally superior to them by nature of birth. Nissa was raised as a member of the Joraga nation. The Joraga, as even the most basic of searches into the Magic wiki tells us, “eschewed outsiders and held even the other elves of Zendikar in disdain.” Nissa carries this distrust of outsiders with her into her adult life and doesn’t really learn to let go of this until she meets the Gatewatch and learns to expand her horizons. And again, Nissa was wrong for this xenophobia. But don’t get it twisted: there is still a big difference between fear and distrust of outsiders and fascist, ‘hierarchy of races’ bullshit. Both are rooted in fear, but for all her many shortcomings, the retconned Nissa of the new lore would never advocate for elves ruling the multiverse at the top of a racial hierarchy like the older Nissa would (and did). This is hammered home in her Origin story where she is horrified by watching Dwynen lead other Lorwyn elves as they slaughter entire tribes because they think it's funny. Furthermore, on the subject of Lorwyn elves, I would argue that old Nissa is fairly boring as a villain, as “racist elves” as a concept was already explored in depth in the Lorwyn stories. An entire planeswalker with that as her bit would get boring very quickly.

Lastly, and I suppose this is subjective, but isn’t a nuanced character, deeply flawed but trying her best to shed the xenophobia ingrained in her more interesting that an unrepentant, racist dumbass learning that “goblins are people actually!” only after she condemned an entire world to death? The latter might be (darkly) funnier, I’ll give you that, but the former makes for a much more interesting and emotionally satisfying narrative arc.

[merrinla]

Poking around in the EA build and indulging in nostalgia. What else I love about Halsin from EA. He was more confident in himself and he always had a witty answer ready. His lines when Tav argues with him are hilarious. I miss it.

Halsin: I am a healer of some renown, if I can cast aside modesty a moment.

Player: If you can help me, you should do it now! Halsin: There is an order to things. First, I need to safeguard my grove from these butchers. Then I shall see to you. [devnote: Stern, his way or the highway]

Player: Not my problem. I saved you - you will help me. Now. Halsin: Please, spare me your efforts at intimidation. No more effective than those goblin children's taunts. [devnote: Stern and unimpressed]

Player: Enough delays. I want to be cured. Now. Halsin: Then go forth. There are no easy paths to what you seek. If you seek my aid, you must show patience. [devnote: Stern. 'Show patience or you get nothing']

Player: Why do I sense more delays and excuses incoming? Halsin: Because you're a realist, I'll wager. Or a pessimist. But yes, I'm afraid there is still work to do.

Player: You've said little I couldn't figure out for myself so far. Halsin: And yet here you are, desperate for help. Hold your tongue until I'm done.

Player: You can't just cut it out? Halsin: I could, but I'd be cutting it out of a corpse. We'll have to try a different approach.

Player: I didn't agree to your company. Halsin: You didn't agree to host mind flayer spawn either, but sometimes your fate is wrested from your hands.

[fillingthescrapbook]

Let's Talk About: Shady by the Sea

The Questing Queens are bonafide Dungeons and Dragons players now! Why? Because they took time to debate in the middle of a campaign. An actual debate! And you can see how proud Brennan is at how far his queens have gotten.

Bob the Drag Queen is now (un)officially the team leader too. Not just because Twyla (Jujubee) sarcastically labeled them as the leader, and not just because they keep directing the other characters into saying the right things…but also because Gertrude is now the string that binds the different plot lines together.

Just not the kind of string that Twyla is collecting.

Alaska as Princess continues to deliver laughs but they also continue to take a back seat in terms of plots. But it looks like Brennan is teeing them up for a spotlight next week--because we do only have two episodes left. And Everdeep--and the culmination of Monet X Change's story line for Troyann--is already reserved for the finale…as per the recommendation of Jujubee, Kelvordan Manager of Story Mapping.

Also, I find it really funny that Monet keeps adding to her water walk hall of fame: last week, it was standing on the path of the elemental goblins, and this week, it's adopting an NPC that all the other players didn't want to tag along.

And then there's Jujubee's heartbreaking heart-to-heart with Mysara that ends with an actual stealing of a heart. Twyla's heart. In the form of her possible romantic partner.

The Questing Queens have all found their lanes in Dimension 20--and I am a little sad that we're about to say goodbye to them again very soon. I hope they come back again for another campaign. (I am also still hoping very much for an additional player though.)

Lastly: I guffawed when Brennan shouted, "Wizards! Your books can't save you now!" It's probably not intentional, but with how Wizards is handling D&D--this line was very hilarious to me.

[terapsina]

#2 for the book worm ask game!

(ask game)

2. Favorite fantasy book(s).

(Eeeeexcellent, I do love fantasy books. Though how I'm gonna narrow it to only a few I've got no idea. Okay. I'm going to remove the very obvious choices like Lord of the Rings (though it is one of my faves)).

---

Monstrous Regiment. I love the entire Discworld series (especially The Witches) but I've also got a huge soft spot in my heart for Terry Pratchett's take on 'a girl dresses like a boy to go to war' (and thinks of everything except some spare socks in- erm... the right place). Along with Polly, the squad consists of a vampire, a troll, an Igor, a religious fanatic and two very, very close "friends" (and yes, the official summary put the friends in quotes too). And everyone has their own secret.

I love basically everything about this book and I can't tell you guys any of it because it would spoil all the fun.

The Goblin Emperor. This one's a story filled with light. Maia the half goblin son of the elven Emperor was never supposed to take the throne (or to ever even be at court. because racism). And then everyone ahead of him dies in a single "accident" and suddenly he's the new Emperor. Maia is a good person, and a kind one, and despite everything that gets thrown at him he keeps hold of that understanding of right and wrong and refuses to bend.

(I have to mention that the language of the writing is kinda hard to get into in the beginning, and the characters's have very complicated and long names, but once you get into it it really did enhance the story for me).

Good Omens. An Angel and a Demon try to stop the apocalypse and instead lose the Antichrist. I've loved that book for like a decade now and if I don't put it on a list of my faves that list would be a lie.

The King of Attolia. Third in The Queen's Thief series and my favorite one out of all of them. I've always enjoyed Outsider POV in fics. And here is a book that just... proves why. We've got Eugenides and Irene, the Thief and the Queen, and we know them from the two previous books. And adore them. But the story isn't from their POV, it's from the POV of Costis, a Queen's guard who's suddenly gotten assigned to the King. The useless, weak, undeserving king that as far as Costis is concerned doesn't deserve to even kiss the Queen's boots. And it's hilarious to read the story from the eyes of someone who knows so much less than us. And so satisfying, as he begins to understand.

(I recommend the whole series and am personally glad to have read them in the published order but Megan Whalen Turner has stated that she wrote them in a way that allows you to jump in at any point you want).

The Raven Tower. The story is from the viewpoint of a sentient, omniscient rock whose name is Strength and Patience of the Hill and it is the GREATEST THING EVER. The gods are real and must be very careful with their words, because if they speak a lie the reality will alter to make that lie the truth but if the lie is bigger than the power of the god... well. Inspired by Hamlet.

(the book also has a trans man as the main character; the other main character? The sentient rock is the narrator but the largest part of the story focuses on Eolo).

A Natural History of Dragons. The first book from The Memoirs of Lady Trent (and honestly it would probably be more honest to say that every single book from this series fits the category of fave but I'm putting up the first here because this isn't a series where you should skip ahead). The book focuses on the life of Isabella as narrated by her older self. This is the story how a Scirland lady bucked all tradition and became a world renowned expert on the Natural History of Dragons.

(this series has a piece of my heart and always will).

---

(and finally, here's some more of my favorite fantasy books that I also adore and would totally ramble about but I got tired of typing).

[the-gnomish-bastard]

Just built a cannon designed specifically to launch goblin children. The goblins will of course be wearing suicide vests strapped with unstable warp stones. Now, not only will they explode on impact, they will also warp anything in a 5 meter radius into the Astral Plane.

You all laughed at my abundance of goblins in my dungeons. I have weaponized them beyond understanding. The cannon has a range of 1.25 miles. Fear me.

Some of you may be asking “why didn’t you just use warp stone as ammunition instead of using goblins to carry it?” You wanna know why? Because it’s fucking hilarious. I now shoot screaming explosive goblins. I am having so much fun.

[soaps-mohawk]

Gonna be honest I am so pumped for this series because there is so much LORE waiting to be spilled a and I am a lore GOBLIN OKAY

Like I have so many ideas for omega! Reader! Like since they did nothing but run in the institute I think it would be hilarious for 141 to secretly watch her run and are SHOCKED because they gotta be fast, like run training for years your speed has to be CRAZY

Or even jump strength since they have fucking legs of STEEL, like they go to jump and they just go to the moon LMFAO like imagine Ghost just standing like 🧍‍♂️ 🧍‍♂️

Aww thank you!!! I'm so glad you're enjoying it so far!!

I actually had a scrapped scene where Price wanted reader to do a sort of PFT just to get a baseline idea of their fitness and of course they'd struggle a bit with like push-ups or pull ups but then the like mile run just smokes the track lmao. I might wind up putting something like that back in lol just because it would be hilarious to see their reactions.

They could probably clear Soap if they tried jumping over him lol I mean, they nearly caught Ghost around the neck jumping at him from behind and that man is huge so...legs of steel lol 😂

[viridis-mundo]

City with no name, person with no history

A thousand years ago, Pix voluntarily went into the desert and never returned. A thousand years later, it still has consequences. A short look at friendships that span lives.

"You’ve been spending a lot of time here lately," Pix smiles, there is no claim, no hint of suspicion. The smile is soft, he is simply observing the fact. The sky is blue, the grass is green, the ancient city that Pix is working so hard on has no name. Fwhip has been spending a lot here lately.

It is the middle of summer, and the sun stands high and shines for a long time, making its way even underground to the goblins. Gobland is cooler than the surface, but everyone still works a little slower and a little lazier than usual. Fwhip decided to stop construction during the heat wave. However, when your hands are not busy with materials, it turns out, that he has too much free time.

"Are you against it?" almost escapes Fwhip, but something inside him is suddenly afraid - what if he really is against it? What if suddenly Pix will say that he is tired of the company and overall the goblin is getting under his feet? What if he suddenly leaves? Which is honestly hilarious. Pix may disappear for a day or two or even a week, but everyone knows that this man has simply buried himself again in some ancient hole and sighs in admiration over half-broken vases.

"Someone should make you warm up, old man, otherwise you’ll wither away like your precious artifacts," Fwhip grins, kindly, of course, and Pix laughs too, a little muffled, as if from afar. Fwhip is again overwhelmed by the feeling that Pix is going to disappear right now. Pix has always been... Fwhip doesn't want to use the word "weird" because it implies that everyone else was normal (which they weren't), but there was always something ELSE about Pix's presence. He will tell you a fact and then add something ELSE that he shouldn't know, he will ask you a question, but there is something ELSE in the question, but you don't know for sure what it is, you will say the answer and he will hear something ELSE, incomprehensible to you. And then he will smile again and for some reason, you will feel sad.

"As if I don’t have enough warming up without you, little children," he is only like maybe eight years older than Fwhip, but Pix again looks into the distance, at the restored castle, and in his eyes is the regret of an immortal. Fwhip resists the urge to grab Pix by the sandy (it's blue-gray) shirt, like a really small child afraid of losing a parent at the festival. "I do need some fresh air from time to time," Fwhip adds more quietly, still hoping to keep his voice light-hearted, but, judging by Pix’s look, failing catastrophically. Pix looks at him closely, but not as intensely as, for example, Scott, with his magic eye, or Gem, with the carefree attitude of a princess, but with hawk's sight. Pix’s gaze is soothing, like a heavy blanket after a nervous day, like a mug of warm milk before bed, like the quiet dance of stars in the night sky. And just as centuries ago, people looked at the sky and looked for constellations, so Pix is always looking for something in someone else’s soul. With the precision of an archaeologist, he unearths long-forgotten (or buried) emotions, and Fwhip has always taken this as a challenge.

I have nothing to hide! Here I am!

But today, under Pix's magnifying glass, something too forgotten turned out to be, something that Fwhip was not ready to face. This something had a taste of redstone, gunpowder, and for some reason sand. The sand got into his teeth, into his nose, into his eyes, and that’s probably why Fwhip found that his eyes were watering. He nuzzles his nose into Pix’s shirt (it’s blue-gray), and he smells of copper - he was working on the copper aging machine underground. And this smell also calms, but for some reason, the tears keep flowing and flowing.

"I’m not going anywhere," Pix says quietly, hugging Fwhip back. And there is no consolation in the voice, only a promise, as if he was going somewhere, but changed his mind. And Fwhip believes, he nods his head, as if agreeing with the decision, and holds Pix even tighter.

A thousand years ago, these same hands could not find a sand shirt to hug and cry into. A thousand years ago, Fwhip stood alone in the middle of a desert that stretched for thousands of miles around him and wept alone. A thousand years ago, Pix voluntarily disappeared into the desert. A thousand years ago his friend did not return.

"I'm here," Pix says again as Fwhip calms down under the setting sun. The night embraced friends.

[ipostmysimpingstuffanonymously]

Another post? damn

I was on vacation a few weeks back and had no internet so I downloaded all Fanfciton that were Satoru/Shoko tagged and rated them.

Here are the ones I rated 5/5 ... so i guess this is a ff recommendation post lol

The delicate art of flirting

3rdgymbros

Words: 1,960, Satosho, 5/5

This is so good. I love that the first years get brought into the infirmary and they just KNOW ahahahahah. Also it’s just this casual side thing but there something so much deeper that i hurts which i like about this ship

Like a lost shirt

Lua

Words:1,520, Satosho, 5/5

I am a sucker for raw and "practical" relationships. Like this is exactly how I imagine them to grieve for Suguru and I love that so much can be left unsaid but the reader and Satoru and Shoko both just know. What they have isn't healthy but it's the only thing they can have. A happy and healthy relationship with someone else would just simply not work. They are both too fucked up for that.

Sorry about the blood in your mouth (i wish it was mine)

Her_black_tights

Words: 17,761 Sashisu/ Satosho 5/5

So I am biased on this one cuz this is one of my headcanons. That Suguru fucked around with both and that his absence is why Gojo and Shoko are a thing. And I feel like this fic perfectly encapsulates the hurt, the brokenness and the necessity of their relationship. Like this is how they cope and its messy and unhealthy and i love it

Listen I love you joy is coming

Antioedipus

Words:3,938 Satosho 5/5

This one is cute. Nah cute is the wrong word, they are goblins but it’s nice. They are both fucked up which is funny. Also 100% can see that Shoko doesn't have the emotional capacity to console a crying woman but still would do the right thing even if she doesn't think it’s the right thing. 

Work and not run (skip and not fall)

Aminstrel

Words:2,300 Satosho 5/5

Love this! Cute! Exactly how i Imagine them. Also match cut? Peak comedy hahahaha goblin energy.

Catalyst

tiressian

Words:4,170 Satosho 5/5

AYOOOOO first tiressian ff. i remember reading this and having gotten new horizons opened xD Anyway: love it, super nice character interaction. Love it when Gojo is stumbling over his words, a tiressian special! Also love the aftermath, hilarious but sweet.

To my significant (b)other

Tiressian

Words: 6,621 Satosho 5/5

Another banger! Back to back? Spoiled honestly. I love this one just because it makes so much sense that she writes a list. Also Gojo high as balls is hilarious. Then the whole dialogue at the wedding with the chaste touches omg my skin is prickling. Love it.

Warmth

Satoluvs

Words:2,663 Satosho 5/5

I LOVE THIS. Omg adopted Yuji has my heart. Also consoling somebody by not talking it out but taking them in giving them affection to cure the sadness omg. Also also Satoru and Shoko just dating super casually i looooovee it.

Breathing underwater 

Shrimphony

Words:1,848 Sashisu/ Satosho 5/5

This one hurts so much omg. And this could easily be canon. Idk why Gege does not show us Shoko’s grief more…. Like even if it's platonic how can she not find solace in Gojo still being there hmm? And then when Gojo, Nanami and Yaga get ripped from her, that must have destroyed her…

Shore 

Tiressian

Words:7,161 Satosho 5/5

VERY TASTY thank you for the meal. I love their dynamic. Back with the tiressian special. Also Shoko making him do push ups, same girl same i get it. Love the banter, it makes so much sense.

Epoch

Tiressian

Words:6,341 Satosho 5/5

Yum, yes, very nice. Love cheerleader Gojo, he has my heart, that poor dude. No other comments it's perfect

Call it a hunch

Tiressian

Words: 5,560 Satosho 5/5

I think this is one of my favourites hahhaha. I love how panda is trying to convince everybody hahahahah. Also the snowball fight is glorious xD the little yuta/maki you slipped  in there, i see you hehehehe. And the end has me ROLLING HAHAHAHAH

It's the thought that counts 

Tiressian

Words: 2,182 Satosho 5/5

THE CUTEST ahhhh i love them i really really need to draw the three of them uff.

there's lots of 4/5 ones too that I'd recommend but i need to cap the list somewhere xD (the google doc has 12 pages wtf ahahahah) This is up for changes anyway :P but enjoy my recommendations xD

[curse-of-dming-strahd]

Can we get a variation of the off-limits list so we can all nod knowingly when you say what your location is in-game bc We Know What You Had To Change

YES absolutely, a fine ask and I may pin this response

assurance: I may write like a goblin but I promise I am a confident DM, my friends and I are all having fun with this challenge, and I'm only panicking about how to stitch up plot holes and not how to run the game. And I was already planning on changing a bunch of shit in CoS before my players asked for it to be PG-13 and chill.

that said I've never had to adjust anything quite as hot a mess as CoS before, and I foolishly haven't finished reading this 265 page tome yet so idek what wild shit is waiting for me in the back half, BUT HERE WE GO

BELOW IS THE LIST OF STUFF THAT'S OFF-LIMITS AT THE TABLE

We've agreed the following topics and tropes will be avoided at the table, and will not feature as plot in our story. I've asked players to not include these themes in their backstories or act out these tropes during play:

Ableism, ableist behavior

Bugs (insects, spiders, grubs, maggots, etc., one of my players has a big problem with swarms of little bugs especially)

Cancer or cancer-like disease (no tumors, cancerous growths, etc.)

Cannibalism

Claustrophobic scenarios

Clowns (hilariously I thought this one wouldn't come up BUT THEN I FOUND SOME CLOWN SHIT SOMEWHERE IN CASTLE RAVENLOFT)

Creepy dolls (similar to clowns)

Drug addiction, mechanics that simulate addiction

Eyeball trauma or spooky eyeball imagery

Genocide (stares at Rahadin)

Hangings/lynching (including general gallows imagery)

Homophobia

Incest

Necrophilia

Racism (including fantasy racism)

Religion (we can mention like, a church or a god or something, but we want to avoid religion being a driving plot point or dealing with NPCs who do stuff because of their religion; I've got some plans to get around this but I have a feeling this one in particular may Get Complicated later in the module).

Self-harm

Sexual assault (I gotta be careful with vampire stuff since It's Kind Of A Metaphor)

Slavery, slave labor

Suicide (stares at Strahd's backstory)

Transphobia

Realistic acts of terrorism (very fantasy terrorism is ok though!)

Realistic descriptions of torture

[itsmistyeyedbi]

Here are the thoughts I said I was gonna post while playing bg3, but didn't lol. I think this was over the course of two days before I restarted.

-

I didn't know there were harpies in this game! They were awesome oh my gosh! I'm so glad that I'm playing with a bard, singing yourself out of a trance is such a neat thing to add for them!

Things started moving so quickly now! First visceral hyena birth, then Raphael showing up!? And then the bugbear in the barn thing, but I think Raphael showing up is way more important rn lmaooo. Just randomly spawning in the middle of nowhere!?

I did not mean to activate the Save Mayrina quest but now...wow. Auntie Ethel can just transport you to her swamp? And what the fuck is up with this Addled Frog!? Mxm talking to it was a mistake. I just wanted to investigate Kagha, I wasn't trying to do all this😭

Mirror image on the frog!? 20 constitution!? OH MY GOD SOMEBODY HELP😭

Fuck it, I went back. I cannot fight that thing. I already get grossed out looking at frogs, I cannot with one with mirror images dude. A frog that difficult to get rid of is one of my worst fears💀

I just realised that I am not where I need to be to do this Ethel quest lol. I'll just go long rest and do the small, fun ones for now.

I just got the bite scene after deciding to avoid Grandel, despite how funny it would be for it to happen afterwards.

-

I changed my mind, I went back to the Auntie Ethel fight and after almost an hour of trying to beat her, I got Karlach to push her into the pit and won lmaooooo. I was trying to hold off on doing that but I'm so done with her now.

The Addled Frog is lowkey adorable when you speak to it after dealing with Ethel, the voice acting for it is perfect. I could actually stand to look at it now lol.

The girlies seem to love Alraeyn. She got to high approval pretty quickly with Shadowheart. And as I go to speak to Lae'zel, she hits her with the "your scent makes my hair stand on end" line and I !!! LAE'ZEL!!

Exposed Kagha! Alraeyn would've just killed her if it didn't mean getting involved in a war, so she ended up talking her down.

Sazza is lowkey kinda endearing? For some reason? Alraeyn freed her for easy access to the Goblin Camp but probably thinks she's amusing as well.

Wyll and his storyline is so interesting and knowing neither of them were given the time and care they deserved sucks. I wish we got to explore his relationship with his father more. This response he gives really intrigued me: "A Duke makes bedfellows with more monsters than he slays; father called it 'diplomacy', I called it 'hypocrisy'" "In the frontiers, there is no posturing, no diplomacy. I slay Monsters, I don't consort them. Even if I might look like one" !!! AAAAAH!!!

Also, him getting bashful if tav asks for a demonstration of the courtly dances he developed a taste for is so adorable! And then this exchange: "You dance like a drunk ogre? that sounds hilarious. Count me in!" "Ha! Well give it some time, develop a bond, and maybe I'll show you a move or two. I promise, 'clumsy oaf' is well within my repertoire." PLEASE

Him liking good wine but being quicker to grab a drink at an inn because "better company, and a better buzz"

I didn't think it would be possible for me to side eye the wyll haters any harder than I do now, but experiencing him in-game? Massive side eye.

[lanafofana]

What would a real Lana self-insert Tav situation look like in BG3? (Idea stolen from this original, amazing ,and hilarious post by sorceresssundries

I think it would have to be a reality where Durge was also there, somehow my clutzy manner, witty humor, and amazing story telling would be enough to endear me to him and this would ensure everybody didn't break camp and leave me behind every morning

In lieu of that, he would be the only one brain damaged enough to not recognize a walking talking liability if they crawled out of a pod next to his and booped him on the snoot

(Lae'zel for sure thinks they'd be better off if they left me in the bog.)

Would be at camp more times than not because migraines would make my already useless fighting style (slapping) completely untenable

Would spend the entire tiefling party crying in the woods about watching Astarion gank two goblin children right in front of me

Would be so deep asleep from exhaustion wouldn't even notice Astarion treating himself to my neck like an oversized mosquito.

(He'd also drain me dry and Durge would have to resurrect me with a really long suffering sigh)

Would probably vomit when confronted with the Emperor for the first time.

Would definitely vomit when confronted with an intellect devourer for the first time and the second time and the third and the-

Would spend all of my free time looking for honey for Halsin in hopes of bear hugs

Having a background in a field where I am constantly ignored/talked down to by men I would hate Gale the second he said "I meant are you studied in magic. Which you are not."/"Nothing to worry The Unlettered over" in that condescending tone of his

Could not be dragged by wild owlbears into the submarine because deep water freaks me out too much sorry Omeluum!

Would spend Too Much Time trying to lure every single cat I came across back to camp with me to join my buddies Cub and Scratch

Be so consumed with matchmaking my companions it wouldn't even occur me to try to flirt with anyone

Exhaust everyone's carrying capacity/patience by picking up every single book I find

Be kidnapped by Orin and Durge has to pass several charisma checks to get enough people to agree to a rescue

Head over heels for Barcus Wroot

Immune to fall damage owing to my extensive experience with falling on my face but immediately KO'd by 1 (one) cast of vicious mockery

[hiemaldesirae]

Arrax here: demon Alastor vampire Vox

Yep, endgame for Alastor is to get Vox to hell! By the time it gets there, due to drinking so much of Alastor's blood, he is more of a new kind of demon. He can actually fully eat ppl, blood, flesh, and bones all.

And what DancingafterDark said this is entirely new. It's also changing Vox's sire, however he's getting second hand so it's much, much slower and like the Fae, *It's not Freely Given.*

First thing to remember: This is Alastor's blood, Alastor's power given to his Love, his mate, the one he has known since they were both children and they both went to war together. It's lovingly, freely given to Vox to help him, to keep him fed so he doesn't just have to survive on swamp rats and other animals. Vox's sire is stealing that from Vox's very veins as her forcibly feeds from Vox.

Second thing: Vox's Sire is *letting* Alastor willingly into his body. Now, Alastor would never hurt Vox. Vox is his beloved muse, his childhood best friend and eventually once he is free, his mate. But this Ancient Vampire Lord? He is nothing to Alastor. Nothing more but a creature that hurt what is Alastor's most precious.

Remember what they say.

 "We must not look at goblin men, We must not buy their fruits: Who knows upon what soil they fed their hungry thirsty roots?"

OH !!!!!!!!!!! ohohohohoho rubs my hands together like a dirty sewer rat... i am Thinking now. okay okay so. is al gonna do some freaky bloodbending stuff with the parts of his blood in voxs sire?? like fuckin. svsss heavenly demon style blood parasites that he can control nd make him suffer or something ... because i would sooo be down to see that happen. like genuinely stoked to watch this old crook fucking Explode or something

also im thinking of voxs arrival in hell now LMAO. i dont think hed really look all that much different since hes technically not living anymore anyway ... but that also means he's seen as an easy target (and a valuable one too, since alastor makes it clear the moment he arrives in hell that vox is His) which is SOO hilariously wrong. vox probably eats like 30 people before pentagram city starts to catch on that theres something a little off about the radio demons pretty pet

[freekymonstr]

It’s been a while rant about the oc that is on your mind rn tell me everything and why I should hold their hand

BOY AM I GLAD YOU ASKED!!!!!!

I hope fan characters count cause this is Grayur

They're my BG3 tav that I've been freaking the shit out over, especially because I've been rping him in a multiplayer game with friends lately. I made him over a year ago when the finished game first came out and I will never make another tav again.

He had to leave his home for Baldur's Gate in search of a cure after a hag cursed his village that caused a lot of illness and multiple casualties, including their husband. They've always been the adventuring type but never this far from home or for this long. He's desperate to get rid of the tadpole so he can get back to finding a cure for his village.

He's a mega pacifist, which is shown in game by him either flat out refusing to fight ("that doesn't sound like my problem" is their favorite phrase as they walk away. It really pisses off my friend's durge) or by apologizing profusely as he has to kill something. Each time he kills what he believes was an innocent living being they cut another line into their arm to remind them that they took an innocent life, hence why all scars there.

Grayur will not, however, hesitate to kill someone if they're hurting an innocent creature, as shown when he jumped right into killing everyone in the goblin camp for torturing the owl bear cub. The party was going to go for a stealth fight and Grayur was like "I have to kill the goblins. I am killing the goblins. We are killing the goblins." He shows no mercy nor remorse in these types of situations.

They're stupid as fuck with 8 intelligence and a -1 to all int checks, and he's always doing the dumbest shit, but he's very wisdom. Also a super weakling and is almost always the first to die along with Gale.

Grayur is has a thing for Gale and vice versa but the two are too stupid to realize it. Even Astarion has brought it up (in game!! "So, Gale, how's your hopeless pining going?" "I wouldn't call it hopeless pining. It's been over a year since Mystra rejected me." "Oh, I wasn't talking about Mystra, wizard.") I think that the Circle of Spores druid, who is big on death and reincarnation through the spores, and a necromancer would get along quite nicely. But Gale is convinced Grayur isn't interested because he's widowed and Grayur is convinced Gale isn't interested because he's always talking about Mystra. I love my two dumbfucks.

Speaking of Astarion. He and Grayur are #1 enemies. It's on sight every time they're near each other. Astarion is canonically racist towards gnomes and regularly says the most out of pocket things in the game. And Grayur always just turns to look at him like "are you fucking serious". Even though they hate each other I love their relationship and probably think about it the most out of all the companions because it's hilarious to me. Enemies to enemies who take out their anger on each other and explore each other's bodies sometimes.

Anyway he stands at dick height to almost every companion and my friend's tavs (Tabris and Valas) and I think that's awesome.

idk why the website made his avatar a baby i didn't know how to change it.

[foxes-that-run]

Labyrinth

Labyrinth tells of pain of a past relationship, combined with the realisation of falling back in love with them. Similar to bejewelled, I think there is an element of looking at a current relationship ending through the lens of a past one. It references a 1D song Harry wrote, Half the world away, which was leaked August 2020, 5 months before Midnights was started. HTWA also refers to the tension over Harry saying 'I love you' in Say don't go on 1989TV. It was played at the 9 November Eras show with The Very First Night.

Labyrinth starring David Bowie

The title makes me think of David Bowie's 80's film. The green vinyl also had similar image to background to the cover art. Bowie is a key influence for Harry. In Labyrinth, Bowie is a Goblin King, Jareth, who gives Sarah 13 hours to solve his labyrinth in a misguided attempt win her love. Sarah and Jareth are temperamental and wistfully invested in dreams... not unlike certain popstars.

As well as the Bowie reference this is related to the theme of being trapped or unable to get over this love.

Lyrics

It only hurts this much right now Was what I was thinking the whole time Breathe in, breathe through Breathe deep, breathe out I'll be getting over you my whole life You know how scared I am of elevators Never trust it if it rises fast It can't last

The first verse is reflecting on the emotional turmoil during the relationship (1989) and is rich in references:

Half the World Away "deep in, I'm scared I'll stop breathing"

OOTW "Are we in the clear yet? / In the clear yet, good / Are we out of the woods yet?" When discussing OOTW Taylor said she constantly felt like she needed to overcome the next step.

Suburban Legends "It's ruined my life"

Gorgeous "you've ruined by life by not being mine"

I Wish You Would: "I’ll never forget you as long as I live"

Taylor also referred to this lyric in her NYU speech (27 mins) 4 months before it's release "Hard things will happen to us. We will recover, we will learn from it. We will grow more resilient because of it. And as long as we are fortunate enough to be breathing we will breathe in, breathe through, breathe deep, breathe out. And I am a doctor now, so I know how breathing works."

Also Getaway Car includes a line from Hilary Duff's Breathe in. Breath Out. (X marks the spot where we fell apart) Taylor also 'referenced' this song musically for Paper Rings.

Harry also sings Breathe me in, Breathe me out in Watermelon Sugar.

Uh oh, I'm falling in love Oh no, I'm falling in love again Oh, I'm falling in love I thought the plane was going down How'd you turn it right around

The chorus tells of realising that a love she thought was gone has come back. It references a leaked One Direction song that

Say don't go has a similar 'oh no' to this 'uh oh' meaning realisation, there it is that is is ending, here it is that it has come back.

On One Direction's Half the world away Harry wrote “I want you around, 'round, 'round / Are we going down, down, down?”

It only feels this raw right now Lost in the labyrinth of my mind Break up, break free, break through, break down You would break your back to make me break a smile You know how much I hate that everybody just expects me to bounce back Just like that

The bounce back line is to me where we can see the similarities drawn between a past relationship (Harry) and most recent (Joe). The announcement Harry and Taylor split (for the boat time) was in real time. With paparazzi photos of them both over the next days. She learnt from that and stopped sharing at all when she dated Harry again and with CH and Joe the announcement came months after.

As in many songs, Taylor's mind is a labyrinth and she can't get past this love. She tells herself if only feels so raw, but the chorus speaks to the 'built to fall apart and get back together' nature. The pain is her anxiety as described in Gold Rush, Slut! and Say Don't Go, and focus in I know places.

Harry has sung about Taylors smile and sacrifice to have her:

Someday (sung by Michael Buble) "I love seeing you happy / I miss seeing you smile" and "For her I bend, for you I break / And if I can't be yours now / I'll wait here on this ground / 'Til you come, 'til you take me away / Maybe someday"

Half the World Away: "Now I walk to you 'til my feet hurt / So tell me that's not good enough"

If I could Fly: "I think I might / Give up everything, just ask me to"

Half the World Away also has a similar structure, both repeat the chorus about a plane/relationship going down many times at the end.