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#Half baked thoughts of a bird
ryderdire · 2 years
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Sometimes I kinda wish Leif and Barrel took active roles in the plot as ghosts or something but. Then again that would take away from the whole I fucked things so badly up with both my closest friends and now I can never fix it because their both gone” shit andrais has going on but also I think Leif going “what the fuck andrais I broke up with you 1000 years ago and your still taking it out on some random 13 year old and her friends” would be so cathartic so idk
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sturnioloisland · 3 months
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Birds of a Feather | M.S.
Pairing: Matt x Fem!Reader
Warnings: mmm a little bit of fluff and a little bit of angst here and there. Not proofread tho.
Requested: No
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“I want you to see how you look to me”
You were getting ready for your weekly night out with Matt. Your activities varied from week to week sometimes choosing to go watch a movie, gaze at the stars on the beach, or sometimes go to a nice dinner. A nice dinner was the plan for tonight.
You had chosen to get ready at your own place to savor the peace and quiet in the comfort of your own home. You’d gone through almost half of your closet trying to find an outfit you thought would be appropriate for dinner, which had taken upwards of almost thirty minutes to decide — finally settling on one after tearing the closet apart.
You felt a sense of giddiness while you were finishing getting ready. You and Matt had been dating for a while, but he still never failed to make your heart flutter and cause butterflies in your stomach. You smiled to yourself just thinking about him as you finished styling your hair.
The sun was just beginning to set on the horizon when you received a text from Matt that was informing you that he was here causing you to race to the front door to unlock it and let him inside. You opened the door and felt your stomach doing somersaults. He looked so beautiful in the fading light of day.
“Hey.” You said quietly at him, continuing to admire the way he looked.
“Hey, baby.” He returned the smile to you, his hands in his pockets as he rocked back and forth on the balls of his feet. “Are you gonna let me in or do I have to continue baking in the sun?”
“Oh right.” You quickly stepped to the side, opening the door wider to grant him entrance. “I just need to grab my purse real quick and then I’ll be ready.” You said as you quickly headed back to your room.
“There’s no rush.” He called out to you.
You made your way back to him, purse in hand, and saw him look you up and down. “Is it okay?” You asked, gesturing to your outfit.
“More than okay,” his smile still plastered on his face, “You look so beautiful.”
Of course you felt a blush race across your cheeks from his compliment. You’ve never been able to avoid it.
You walked closer to him and he wrapped his arms around you in a hug, breathing in the perfume you had chosen to wear for the night. When he pulled away, he traced his hands down the side of your body, resting them just above your hips and placed a kiss on your forehead. “You always look so beautiful.”
You had to break your eye contact in that moment, not being able to hold it any longer from the feeling of just pure joy and emotion coursing through you. He looked at you with nothing but love and adoration in his eyes, and it never failed to almost bring you to tears sometimes. You looked back up and him and tucked a stray piece of his hair back behind his ear. “I wish you were able to see the way you look at me.”
“And why is that, hm?” He leaned his head into your touch against the side of his face.
“Because then you’d understand why I always feel so safe and loved in your presence.”
He smiled and turned his head to kiss the palm of your hand. “I love you.” He grabbed your hand from his face and guided you towards the door, “C’mon, let’s go get dinner.”
──・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ──
“You wouldn't believe if I told ya, You would keep the compliments I throw ya”
“I just don’t understand why you refuse to accept any compliments I give you.” You and Matt were in the midst of a heated discussion that, quite frankly, spiraled a lot faster than you had realized.
“I don’t understand why you have to lie when you give them. I don’t need you making up things just to try and make me feel better.” It had all started when you tried to cheer him up after his was consistently losing in the video games he had been playing.
“Matt, I’m not lying to you. I just don’t know why you can’t take a compliment.” You had an inkling on why he sometimes rejected any compliments you threw at him. You knew he had his insecurities and they sometimes translated into your relationship. Just like you felt you were not good enough for him, he too felt that same way sometimes. When he got in that sort of mood, he sometimes felt you were just trying to trick him into thinking that you loved him. It was a heartbreaking thing to watch Matt trick himself into believing he didn’t deserve your love, but you were always quick to try and help him shut those thoughts out.
“Matt.” You sat down on the edge of his bed near where his gaming chair sat. He turned his chair to face you, and you grabbed one of his hands. “I understand that sometimes you think that you don’t deserve love, but you do. If you saw yourself the way I saw you, you would understand the compliments I give you. You would understand why I am so deeply in love with you that it almost hurts.”
“But-”
“There’s no ‘but’, Matt. I love you so much, and I know you know that I do. Your mind is just playing tricks on you. I love you.”
He avoided your gaze, and stared down at his feet, releasing his hand from your grip to pick at the beds of his nails obviously not knowing what to say in response to you. You grabbed his hand back to prevent him from breaking any skin, and placed a kiss on the back of his hand.
“I love you, Matt. Don’t ever forget that.”
“I love you too.”
──・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ──
“Say you don't see it, your mind's polluted. Say you wanna quit, don't be stupid.”
It was another bad day for Matt, and your heart broke to see him suffering in such a way. You wanted to help him, but you didn’t know the right words to say to help. It was a combination of his anxiety and insecurities. Logically, he knows deep down that you would never do something to hurt him, but his brain refuses to truly let him believe that.
It all started because you had gone out with a few friends. Because you were dating Matt, it was hard to do things in public because your every move seemed to be followed by people online. A picture of you and a male friend surfaced online from that night out. It was a picture of you and your group of friends parting ways, and you had given them each a hug before you left. The picture, however, only captured you hugging the male. After having a really hard day, the picture only sent Matt spiraling even more.
Watching Matt spiral and come up with different scenarios that couldn’t be farther from the truth broke your heart. He threw accusations at you which you denied — remaining patient through it all. He hardly ever became like this, and you knew that once the situation blew over in a day or two, you both would be able to sit and talk it out together.
What threw you for a surprise was when Matt suggested ending the relationship. Your eyes widened and you were quick to shut down the idea. “Don’t be stupid, Matt.”
“You would be happier if we did though. You wouldn’t be tied down by me and all of my issues.” He stood opposite of the room from you, one arm crossed against his chest, the other one up to his face as he chewed on his nails.
“No, no, no,” you walked towards him, almost cornering him against the wall “we are not breaking up because of some picture. I swear on everything that I love that he is just a friend. You are the person I love. You are the person I want to be with. You are the one who makes me the happiest person in the entire world.”
“I just don’t understand how you can love someone like me.” The tears pooled in his eyes, and seeing Matt cry always triggered a tearful response from you as well. You rubbed your hands up and down Matt’s shoulders, swallowing a small sob you felt building in your throat from the words that he had just spoken to you.
“Because Matt, you are the one who brightened my life when you came into it. You are the one who always listens to me and offers me a shoulder when I need to cry on it. You are the one who opened so many new opportunities to me. You, and you alone, have made such a positive impact on my life that I can’t even bear the thought to be without you. That’s how I love someone like you.”
Tears had slowly fallen down his cheek at your words and you pulled him into a hug as you both slowly sank to sit down on the floor. “You don’t see it yet, but one day you’ll understand why I love you so much.”
──・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ──
“And I don't know what I'm crying for. I don't think I could love you more.”
It was Matt who was always there to comfort you on your toughest days. He was the one who would help pull you back up from the trenches of your own mind because you do it for him as well. He knows you hate seeing him so heartbroken and in pain, but he feels even worse when he sees you like that.
He made it his own personal life mission to make you happy in whatever way he possibly could. The times you spent together were the happiest moments of his life, even if the both of you were having a lazy day in bed — which is what the plan for the day had turned into.
Your head was rested on his chest and his fingers ran through your hair as you both focused on the movie playing in front of you. One of your arms was wrapped across his stomach tracing small patterns underneath his shirt and on his skin. You both were at peace in that moment.
He stared at the back of your head, his mind wondering off imagining the life that you guys could have together.
He could see himself marrying you and building a family together. He could see the both of you growing old and still enjoying watching the sunsets together. He could see himself loving you until the day that he died.
He felt the tears burning in his eyes, and when he went to wipe them away, you turned to look at him. You felt a moment of panic seeing him become so emotional, “What’s wrong baby?” You had sat up and turned to face your entire self towards him.
“I just love you so much, and it’s pathetic that I’m crying about it, but I do. I do love you so much, and I can’t imagine my life without you.” You felt your heartstrings tugging at his words and you moved to wrap your entire body around him — causing him to wrap his arms around you in turn.
You peppered kisses all across his face and cheeks that were now wet with his tears. “And I love you even more than that. You are my entire world.”
A/n: I hope you guys like it :) This is the longest thing I have written actually. Let me know how you feel about it!!
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solarisfortuneia · 1 year
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— 𝐬𝐦𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐧 𝐤𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐧.
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✦ info: he's so, so in love with you.
✦ warnings: not proofread.
✦ featuring: jing yuan, gepard landau.
✦ notes: please do know i've done no research i only know bits and pieces of actual game lore these are simply self indulgent and silly Thoughts i'm having about them in the middle of the night <3 (i have no clue what this is i js think it's cute)
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— smitten! jing yuan, who thinks of you all day, every day, while doing his official duties, while sparring with yanqing, while speaking with officials, even just before his afternoon nap.
(the strangest of things remind him of you: an oddly shaped rock takes him back to the time when you baked something for him, and the dew shining on a leaf brings with it a recollection of the sparkle in your gaze. it is almost as if you've claimed more than half the space in his head, stubbornly refusing to surrender it into the hands of his daily tasks.
well, he's certainly not complaining.)
— speaking of afternoon naps, smitten! jing yuan, who dreams of you while he dozes in the afternoon. he doesn't remember all of them, but he adores the warm, fuzzy feeling he wakes up with.
— smitten! jing yuan, who names one of his birds after you. he tries not to pick favorites, he really does, but there's just something about the way this little one tilts its head that reminds him so much of you, how can he not like this one the most?
(yanqing once caught him affectionately cooing at the bird with your name. he brings it up every game of starchess they play, hoping to distract the general from stealing another one of his pieces. jing yuan knows what he's doing though, and still ends up stealing a piece or two.)
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— smitten! gepard, who writes letters addressed to you every single day while he's away. some he sends, some he keeps. but every single one of them is filled with all the things he thinks of telling you while you're not by his side.
(the ones he keeps are the sappiest, full of things he's too shy to say to you— about how he longs to return to your warm embrace, about how he wants to taste your cooking, about how he wants to lie in your lap while you pet his hair. perhaps one day, he'll find the courage to say them out loud?)
— smitten! gepard, who finds himself murmuring your name, over and over when he's idle.
(sometimes, if there's a tune running through his head, he sings out the syllables of your name, before catching himself in the act. he shakes his head at himself, red dusting his cheeks, but a tiny smile plays at his lips nevertheless.)
— smitten! gepard, who doodles your name (and perhaps a drawing or two) on a spare piece of paper whenever he's lost in thought. he'd never dare do that on official paper work, though, no way, none at all.
(except... one fine day, he ends up drawing one of his infamous sketches in the margins of a very important, incredibly serious, highly official report to the supreme guardian herself.
he only notices at the very last minute, right before submission, much to his mortification and relief. thank the preservation, he thinks as he redoes it, for—well— preserving his dignity.
who knows how much his sister would have teased him if she found out?)
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taglist: @ilyuu @ineshapanda @supernova25 @kissedbysilk @vixianne
(bold = unable to be tagged!) please fill in the form in my profile to be added, and send an ask to be removed!
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joelscurls · 9 months
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a heart for melting
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pairing: Joel Miller x f!reader
words: 2.7k
warnings: post-outbreak, implied age gap, themes surrounding child loss and grief, some angst but mostly festive fluff, grumpy x sunshine dynamics (Joel is a grinch & reader loves the holidays), reader is described as having long-ish hair
summary: Jackson's first annual Holiday Market brings about more than just cheer.
a/n: Merry Christmas @thetriumphantpanda; I'm your pedrostories secret santa! I hope you enjoy this lil festive take on grumpy!joel x sunshine!reader — I had lots of fun writing it 🤍🎄 🥧 🪵 🦌
Joel doesn’t want to be here — surrounded by garland and ribbons and so much unadulterated joy, it’s nauseating. No, he was forced to be here. 
Please, Ellie had begged, it’ll be good for you to do something other than patrol or drinking with Tommy. Plus, they’re too good to keep to yourself.
They, being wood carvings — the tiny sculptures of deer and bears and birds, tufts of hair and bunches of feathers drawn out of driftwood with the tip of his blade. It was only ever meant to be a hobby, a way to busy his hands after they’d been wrapped around the cold metal of his rifle all day. Something lighter, creative rather than destructive, an act of giving rather than taking. 
But sharing them with other people? He hadn’t been interested. Maybe he’d make one for Ellie or Tommy. Wrap it up in a piece of cloth and offer it as a gift for their birthday.
Not that he thought they were any good, really.
With the announcement of Jackson’s first annual Holiday Market, though, came Ellie’s pleading. “I’ll help you,” she’d bargained. “You don’t even have to give me anything!”
“Who said I would anyway?” he’d grumbled, digging his spoon into the bottom of his bowl of stew and sifting out a chunk of meat.
Joel despises the Holiday Season. He’d welcomed its disappearance with the end of the world. Because he had no reason to celebrate, with Sarah gone. Her absence stung like salt in an open wound on any normal day. But on Christmas, memories of her hanging her favorite ornaments on the tree and sneaking one of the cookies baked for Santa burned behind his eyelids. Left him heaving through hot tears.
The holidays had no place in his world, but they certainly had a place in Jackson. The first time he and Ellie had strode through those gates, they’d been met with that damned Christmas Tree, towering over the settlement like a beacon. And he hated it, hated the way it brought about that pounding in his chest and that spinning in his head. 
How could anyone find any good in such a poignant reminder of loss? 
Tommy says it’s about new beginnings, finding ways to be happy again. And what’s happier ‘n Christmas? God damn Santa Clause, hot chocolate, children singin’ carols?
Still, Joel isn’t convinced — not yet.
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Standing across the mess hall, at your table piled high with baked goods, you are far too cheerful. You’re humming some song with a jovial beat, absentmindedly swaying as you rearrange rows of gingerbread and muffins and scones — all of which are draped in white icing, like flocking on Christmas trees. You pause to wish a happy holiday to everyone who passes through. 
Joel knows he’s seen you before, flitting in and out of the community’s kitchen, always with that signature smile scrawled across your face.
And god, you’re so bubbly, taking to everyone you meet like a bee to honey, letting them in without a care in the world. Popping from table to table, making sure they have enough to eat. That they’re doing well.
It shouldn’t surprise him that you’re so…spirited, too. You seem to find the good in everyone and everything, after all.
It infuriates him, nonetheless.
Joel groans to himself. Stuffs his hands in the pockets of his jeans as an elderly couple rounds on him. 
He grumbles a hello to them when they approach. They offer him half-smiles in return, beginning to pick up some of the carvings laid out on the table — turning them, inspecting them.
“This one’s nice,” the man says to his wife. She hums in agreement. 
“You got any tigers?” the man asks.
“Tigers?”
“Yeah — I used to love ‘em as a kid.”
“Got what’s on the table,” Joel grumbles. 
“You make ‘em custom? I can offer some homemade jam in return — elderberry.”
Joel sighs in annoyance. 
“Don’t make ‘em custom. Got what I got.”
The man seems defeated, nodding and walking off without another word. The woman follows closely behind.
Just as they leave, Ellie appears. She sidles up to Joel and shrugs her jacket off. Pulls a chair up next to him.
“There’s so much cool shit here!” she exclaims, too loud. A judgemental set of eyes flit her direction. She glares right back at them.
“Do you mind?” Joel huffs, jaw ticking.
“Jesus, who pissed in your Cheerios?” 
“How do you even know what Cheerios are?”
“Don’t,” she admits. “I read it in a book.” 
“Of course you did.”
Ellie leans back in her chair, pulling an apple out of her backpack and biting into it. She shuffles some of the carvings around on the table. “Gotta fill in these gaps, man,” she says, juice dribbling down her chin.
Joel ignores her. He sneaks a glance at you; finds that you’re already looking. Your expression is unreadable, gaze unmoving as he studies you.
Despite your upbeat disposition bothering him, he can’t deny that you’re gorgeous: bright, beckoning eyes, siren-like smile — it’s like you’re peering into his soul. 
He didn’t think he still had one of those.
“Dude.” Ellie nudges him. He peels his eyes from you reluctantly. “I asked how many takers you’ve had.”
“Uh.” He pretends to think. 
“You have no fucking idea, do you? Too busy staring at that girl.”
“Wasn’t starin’,” he clips defensively.
“No? Well she’s coming over here, man.”
Sure enough, you’re striding right toward him, abandoning your post. Joel barely has time to prepare for impact.
He unconsciously straightens up and pulls his hands out of his pockets. He brushes them on his jeans just as you stop in front of his table.
“Hi there,” you say.
“Hi!” Ellie chimes.
You pick up a carving of a two-headed deer. His favorite.
“This is beautiful,” you coo. “The craftsmanship is lovely.” You’re running a finger along the grooves in the wood, holding the piece delicately in the palm of your hand — as if it’s made of glass, not wood. “You have a real gift…”
“Joel.”
“Joel,” you repeat. He ignores how sweet his name sounds coming out of your mouth. You tell him your name, and it fits you, he thinks. It’s pretty.
“How long have you been making them?”
“Just since I got to Jackson. ‘ts somethin’ to pass the time.”
You nod. Continue scanning over the intricacies of the deer. “I was never much of a baker before I got here, either,” you joke, gesturing back toward your table.
“Good one,” Ellie laughs. “You’re funny — isn’t she funny, Joel?”
In his head, he’s glowering at her. Outwardly, he feigns amusement.
“Real funny.”
“I’d love to see how you make these sometime,” you say, then, placing the deer back on the table gingerly. “Do you have a workshop?”
“In our shed,” Ellie pipes in before he can say anything. “You should come by tomorrow! Joel’s off patrol.”
He shoots her daggers. She pretends not to notice.
“I’d love that! I have to work in the kitchen, though. I could come by after?”
Joel starts to shake his head no. Ellie’s hand wraps around his arm like a vice grip. He stills.
“Sure,” he grits.
“I can bring some pastries, if you’d like.”
“Don’t like sweets.” 
“Oh,” you say, a little thwarted, but you’re undeterred. You shift on your feet. Chew your bottom lip. “Well, how about something not sweet, then?”
Your brows lift, narrowed eyes on him as you await a response. Joel still isn’t thrilled about the prospect of a visitor. Really, he doesn’t like anyone on his property that isn’t Ellie, or Tommy and Maria if he’s invited them. But you don’t seem so bad, offering to bring him food. 
He can probably deal with your sunny disposition in exchange for a full belly. Lord knows he went too long without that luxury, and he’d be a fool to deny himself of it ever again.
So, he agrees, the garbled sure less than enthusiastic leaving his mouth. Still, you don’t seem too offended. In fact, you smirk at him, wordlessly sauntering back to your table, sneaking glances at him every so often for the remainder of the afternoon.
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Sure enough, the next evening, while Joel is whittling in the shed, you show up.
You’re wielding a basket of savory hand pies, as promised, and Joel has to stop himself from drooling. They smell incredible. And they’re still warm, somehow, steam wafting off of them even after your walk here.
“Come in,” he gruffs, his nose following the scent like a dog’s as he trails behind you inside.
His set up is minimal: a rocking chair next to a bench, a couple stools he made for when Tommy comes by to play poker. But his works are scattered throughout, every surface in the small room cluttered with little carvings.
He settles atop one of the stools as you begin to wander around the room, plucking sculptures off shelves and awing at them with such genuine admiration, it causes something to pull in his chest.
Every so often, you make a remark about the details in a piece, how the fur on the deer looks real, how you can practically smell the replica evergreen in your grasp.
And something shifts — carried by your kind words through the stuffy shed.
Taken by the slight lilt in your voice when you speak to him, the almost-shy smile that pulls at the corners of your lips — Joel is attracted to you.
He’s following the line of your neck down to your collarbone, ogling at the exposed skin there when you pick another carving up off the shelf. And he feels guilty — he shouldn’t be looking at you like this. You’re just being nice, being neighborly, and he’s gawking at you like you’d have any interest in him.
No; you’re young, beautiful, could do a lot better than an old grump like him. 
He averts his gaze quickly when you suddenly set down the tiny, carved bird that had been in your palm, round the workbench and perch yourself atop the stool next to his. You retrieve a handpie out of the basket and pass it over to him. 
“It has braised rabbit and carmelized onions in it,” you explain, taking a bite and letting the steam roll out. 
He follows suit and — it tastes just as good as it smells, if not better. He’s salivating again, letting the dough melt in his mouth before swallowing. 
The two of you eat in comfortable silence, getting through the entire basket in mere minutes.
When you’re finished, you ask him where he’s from. 
The question shouldn’t feel like such a shock to the system. But after a year of being in Jackson, successfully avoiding conversation about his life before the outbreak, it sets off a panging between his eyes, a dull ache in his viscera. 
“Texas,” he tells you plainly. “From Austin, originally.”
You nod. And you must be able to tell that he’s not used to talking about himself — by the tick of his jaw or the lack of eye contact — he’s not sure. Because you don’t pry. Instead, you say, “you can ask me something.”
He nods. Thinks on it for a moment.
“When did you arrive here? To Jackson?” 
Unlike him, you do not grimace at the intrusion. Instead, you tell him: about your parents, their untimely deaths, the harrowing road that led you here. You do not cry, but Joel can see the pain in your shiny eyes. 
It’s inevitable; there isn’t a single person here who hasn’t been dealt a bad hand. But you wear your past like a badge of honor, like you’re still grateful, after it all, to be alive.
Joel envies your tenacity.
So when you ask him about Ellie, if she is his daughter, he lets the walls around him down — just an inch. He doesn’t get upset when he stumbles over his words while telling you about Sarah. He finds comfort in confiding in you, in the way you so attentively listen, quietly nodding along as he recalls his version of the end of the world.
“Thank you,” you say when he’s done, burying his hands back in his pockets.
“For what?”
“For sharing that with me. I know it can be difficult to relive it.”
“I relive it everyday,” he admits. “Everything reminds me of her in one way or another.”
“I understand,” you nod. He believes you do.
So sweet, gaze like honey, you are an enigma to him. He hasn’t met many people who are kind just for the sake of it — not in a long while. Maybe that’s why he’d been so bothered by it at the market. It had felt almost unnatural to him, bound to be laced with an ulterior motive. 
He’s still learning how to trust people again. It doesn’t come easily after twenty-odd years of rationing it like the pills he’d stowed. Still, there is something innate about baring his soul to you. Letting you in through the cracks in his battered being. You are safe, he’s sure of it; benevolence radiating from you like warmth.
It drips off your tongue when you ask him to show you how he does his craft — slips down your fluttering lashes. No longer can he deny you of anything — he’s accepted this swiftly — and so he obliges.
A half-whittled fox materializes from his coat pocket, along with his blade. He passes both to you and pulls his stool closer to yours.
He guides you, taking your hand in his, encouraging the press of the blade into the wood. Shows you how to round out a corner with a subtle twist of the knife. You’re a fast learner, Joel notes, attentive, taking every instruction like gospel.
The slow drag of steel, your fingers wrapped tightly around the handle; you’re so focused that you jump slightly when he places a reassuring hand on your knee.
“Doin’ great, darlin’,” he says, and your lips pull around pearlescent teeth. Joel feels as enraptured by you as you do the carving — the loose tendrils of hair that drape over your shoulder, the clinging of cotton to your soft curves. Though he hardened into stone a long time ago, he feels smelted in your presence. So he cannot help it when his fingers begin to drift up your leg, settling at your side as he turns his body toward yours.
The blade stalls, tip still stuck into the wood, puncturing the fox’s non-existent spine, and your face lifts. 
“Is this okay?” he whispers. You nod, gaze flickering between his eyes and his lips.
You’re so close like this; Joel can smell the floral perfume dappled along your neck, can feel your warm breath fanning his face. He has half a mind to stop himself from sealing the sliver of distance left between you. But then you’re sighing, placing the blade and the wooden fox on the tabletop. And it’s your turn to guide him — winding your delicate fingers around his wrist and settling his hand at the small of your back.
The air in the tiny workshop grows heavy with unspoken desire, a longing to disrupt; to create. Your body forms to his languidly, arms interlocking behind his neck, fingers weaving in his hair to pull him closer to you. And then your lips press to his — hesitant at first, then not. You drink from each other until you are drunk, breathless and giddy when you separate. 
“That was nice,” you whisper, and Joel chuckles. 
“Just nice?”
“Great,” you amend. “It was great. Better than I imagined, even.”
“You imagined this?”
“Yes,” you smirk. “On a loop since I first saw you at the market.”
He pulls you back in. Gives you another chaste kiss. “For good measure.”
“Joel,” you say then, “will you and Ellie come by mine on Christmas? I could even cook — it’s just-”
“Yes,” he’s accepting before you can finish. “I’d love that. As long as you make more of those,” he gestures toward the empty basket on the workbench. 
“That can be arranged,” you grin.
As soon as you leave that evening — sent off with a goodbye muttered between slotted mouths — Joel starts on your Christmas present. 
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end notes: thank you for reading! Please consider reblogging or leaving a comment if you enjoyed <3
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veronicaphoenix · 10 days
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until the stars stop shining | noah sebastian
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previous part to all that's left, but it can be read as a one shot.
summary: noah and his girl spend an evening by the lake | words: 1.2k | reading time: 5mins
tags & trigger warnings: fluff, fluff, fluff. noah is an illustrator, reader loves baking cookies, mentions of noah having been reader's first, and that's it—they love each other a ton.
This is for the anon that asked for something sweet and fluffy after i posted All That's Left. I hope this does it. It's not actually a standalone work, but a sort of flashback belonging to the same story where All That's Left happens. I have a full plot developed in my head, but I can't tell if I'll ever write it and post it, so here goes this little thing where you get to know a little bit more of those characters and the story.
Thank you for all your constant love and support <3
 ͢ until the stars stop shining
Noah leaned back in the Muskoka chair, one leg lazily stretched out, balancing his sketchbook on his lap. He was shirtless, only wearing his bathing suit. For over an hour, he had been sketching, savoring the tranquil solitude offered by the lake, the warm caress of the late afternoon sun, and the rustling of leaves. Early fall was the perfect time for moments like this, when nature felt intimate and unhurried. Most of the tourists had long gone, leaving behind only the soft chorus of birds and the quiet murmur of waves licking the shore.
The breeze teased the pages of his sketchbook, carrying with it the crisp scent of pine needles and the rhythmic whisper of water against the rocks. Noah’s pencil glided in slow, thoughtful strokes as he tried to capture the scene before him, but his thoughts drifted constantly to his girl.
The door to the cottage creaked open right then, and she stepped outside. She carried a wooden tray filled with oat cinnamon cookies, their powdered sugar dusting glinting in the soft afternoon light. The sweet, comforting aroma mingled with the crisp air, making Noah smile to himself even without glancing back. 
She padded softly down the dock, her bare feet almost silent against the worn wood, and placed the tray on the armrest of his chair, her fingers grazing his shoulder in a brief, affectionate touch.
“I baked something,” she said, her voice carrying that familiar warmth. Of course she had. Baking was her favorite thing to do.  “Something sweet for my favorite artist.”
Noah grinned as he finally looked at her, his eyes catching on the spot of flour smeared across her nose. She had no idea it was there, and he decided not to tell her—she looked adorable like that.
“You need to refill your energy after working so hard for hours on end,” she pointed out as she glanced at the open sketchbook on his lap. 
Instead of reaching for a cookie, Noah broke off a small piece and gently brought it to her lips. Her smile widened as she took a bite, the sweetness melting on her tongue. A moment later, he let out a soft chuckle, reaching to brush a crumb off her lip with the pad of his thumb. His eyes lingered on her for a beat longer before dropping back to his half-finished sketch.
“I’m not half as good at drawing as you are at baking,” he admitted.
She tilted her head, glancing at the sketch. “This one looks pretty good to me, Noah.”
He smirked, a playful gleam in his eyes. “Wait until you see the one I did last night, after you fell asleep on the couch.”
“Why do you find it so entertaining to draw me?”
His gaze softened as he looked back at her. “Because you’re my favorite subject.”
That’s when he bopped her nose, making the flour stain disappear.
Her grin was bright and effortless as she leaned over the back of his chair, wrapping her arms around his neck. She rested her chin on his shoulder, close enough to feel his warmth. “And you’re my favorite person to bake for,” she whispered.
Noah’s cheeks flushed slightly at her words, a rare blush coloring his usually composed expression. She kissed the warm skin of his left cheek, lingering for just a moment before pulling away with a satisfied smile. She wandered toward the edge of the dock, her bare feet padding softly against the wooden planks. She sat down, her legs hanging off the edge.
Noah watched her for a moment, admiring how the wind gently tousled her hair and the way the light danced off her skin. The contentment in her posture, the way her eyes reflected the colors of the setting sun—everything about this moment felt perfect.
“You ever gonna let me teach you how to swim?” Noah asked.
She hesitated for a moment, her gaze fixed on the water before she responded quietly, “I don’t know... I’m still a bit scared of it.” She dipped her feet a little deeper, letting the cool water lap around her ankles. “But... I love being here. With you.”
The memory of that first visit just the two of them was vivid in both their minds. This was Jolly’s cottage, the same place where Noah and her had meet back when she was still fourteen and he was eighteen. They had spent countless of weekends and birthdays and fourths of July in this very same place. But nothing had been as special as the weekend Noah convinced Jolly to let him stay with her, alone. It had been six years since then, and even now, the memory of taking her virginity—in Jolly’s bed—was still as clear as water.  
Noah watched as the wind played with her hair, blowing soft strands across her face. He picked up his sketchbook again, unable to resist capturing her in this moment—the peacefulness, the effortless beauty. His pencil moved in quick, steady strokes as he sketched her sitting at the edge of the dock, her feet in the water, the sun casting an orange glow over the horizon. He knew that one day, he would marry this girl. There was no question in his mind.
Once satisfied with the drawing, Noah quietly set his sketchbook aside and rose from the chair. He walked over to her with slow, deliberate steps, his heart swelling as he took in the sight of her in this perfect, secluded spot. Without warning, he bent down, pretending to lift her by the underarms as if he were about to toss her into the water.
She yelped in surprise, her heart leaping as she felt her feet lift off the dock. “Noah!” 
Before she could fully react, Noah pulled her back into his arms, turning her around to face him. She clung to him, her legs instinctively wrapping around his waist, her arms tightening around his neck, her pulse racing from the surprise.
“Don’t you dare!” she gasped, breathless from both fear and thrill, burying her face against his neck.
Noah laughed with her, holding her close, feeling her warm breath against his skin. “I wouldn’t let you go that easily,” he murmured, pressing a soft kiss to her temple.
Still holding her, Noah carried her over to the blanket they had left spread out on the dock earlier. He gently laid her down, her body sinking into the soft fabric, and then settled beside her. 
“Don’t you ever,” she started to say, “ever, let me drown, Noah Sebastian.”
“Never ever,” he promised, showing her his pinky finger. 
She laced it with hers and finally, she let out a heavy sigh and cuddled closer to him, nuzzing her cheek against his bare shoulder. 
They lay close, facing each other, their fingers lazily tracing along each other’s arms and faces. Neither spoke for a long while. Her fingers trailed down his chest while his hand rested lightly on her hip. Above them, the stars began to appear, one by one, until the sky was a dark, glittering canvas. The moon’s reflection shimmered on the water.
“How long will you love me?” Noah asked, his voice barely louder than the breeze.
She gazed at him, eyes warm and steady. She placed the most tender of kisses on his lips.
“Until the stars stop shining.”
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dduane · 5 months
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Of parsnips and parsnip soup
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So the question of parsnips, and particularly parsnip soup, came up secondary to this quote from an interview with Terry Pratchett. (Thanks to @captainfantasticalright for the transcription.)
Terry: “You can usually bet, and I’m sure Neil Gaiman would say the same thing, that, uh, if I go into a bookstore to do a signing and someone presents me with three books, the chances are that one of them is going to be a very battered copy of Good Omens; and it will smell as if it’s been dropped in parsnip soup or something in and it’s gone fluffy and crinkly around the edges and they’ll admit that it’s the fourth copy they’ve bought”.
And when @petermorwood saw this, he immediately reblogged it and added four recipes for parsnip soup.
These kind of surprised some folks, as not everybody knew that parsnips were an actual thing: or if they were, what they looked like or were useful for.
The vegetable may well be better known on this side of the Atlantic. (And I have to confess that as a New Yorker and Manhattanite, with access to both great outdoor food markets and some of the best grocery stores in the world, I don't think that parsnips ever came up on my personal radar while I was living there.) So I thought I'd take a moment to lay out some basics for those who'd like to get to know the vegetable better.
The parsnip's Linnaean/botanical name is Pastinaca sativa, and in the culinary mode it's been around for a long time. It's native to Eurasia, and is a relative to parsley and carrots (with which it's frequently paired in the UK and Ireland). The Romans cultivated it, and it spread all over the place from there. Travelers who passed through our own neck of the woods before the introduction of the potato noted that "the Irish do feed much upon parsnips", and in the local diet it filled a lot of the niches that the potato now occupies.
You can do all kinds of things with parsnips. The Wikipedia article says, correctly, that they can be "baked, boiled, pureed, roasted, fried, grilled, or steamed". But probably the commonest food form in which parsnips turn up around here is steamed or simmered with carrots and then mashed with them: so that you can buy carrot-and-parsnip mash, ready-made, in most of our local grocery chains.
It also has to be mentioned that most Irish kids have had this stuff foisted on them at one point or another, and a lot of them hate it. (@petermorwood would be one.) I find it hard to blame anybody for this opinion, as one of the parsnip's great selling points—its spicy, almost peppery quality—gets almost completely wiped out by the carrot's more dominant flavor and sweetness.
Roasting parsnips, though, is another matter entirely. They roast really well. And parsnip soups are another story entirely, as it's possible to build a soup that will emphasize the parsnip's virtues.
So, to add to Peter's collection, here's one I made earlier—like yesterday afternoon, stopping the cooking sort of halfway and finishing it up today.
I was thinking in a vague medioregnic-food way about a soup with roasted bacon in it, but not with potatoes (as those have been disallowed from the Middle Kingdoms for reasons discussed elsewhere. Tl;dr: it's Sean Astin's fault). And finally I thought, "Okay, if we're going to roast some pork belly or back bacon, then why not save some energy and roast some parsnips too? The browned skins'll help keep them from going to mush in the soup."
So: first find your parsnips. I used four of them. You peel them with a potato peeler...
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...sort of roughly quarter them, the long way...
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...then chop them in half the short way, toss them in a bowl with some oil—olive oil, in this case—spread them on a baking sheet, and season them with pepper, coarse salt, and some chile flakes. (I used ancho and bird's-eye chile flakes here.)
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These then went into the oven for about half an hour, and came out like this.
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While that was going on, I got a block of ready-cooked Polish snack bacon out of the freezer.
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On its home turf, this is the kind of thing that turns up (among other ways) sliced very thin on afternoon-snack plates, with cheeses and breads. But we like to score it and roast it to sweat some of the fat out, and then use it in soups and stews and so forth.
So I scored this chunk on most of its sides, browned it in a skillet, then shoved the skillet into the oven for twenty minutes or so. Here's the bacon after it was done.
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While it was cooking, I made about a liter of soup stock from a couple of stock cubes. If you can get pork stock cubes, they'd be best for this, but beef works fine.
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This then went into the pot and was brought up to just-boiling while the bacon and the parsnips were chopped into more or less bite-sized chunks. After that, the meat and veg were added to the pot and the whole business was left to simmer for a couple of hours while I went off to do some line editing.
Finally I turned it off and left it on the stove overnight (our kitchen is quite cool, it was in no bacteriological danger from being left out this way) and then finished its simmering time around lunchtime today.
And here it is. (...Or was. It was very nice.)
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...Anyway, this is only one of potentially thousands of takes on parsnip soup. Recipes for more robust versions—based on mashed parsnips and more vegetables, or different meats—are all over the place.
Meanwhile, as regards how much damage this soup could do to your copy of Good Omens if you dropped yours in it, I'd rate this at about 5 damage points out of 10. ...Call it 5.5 if you factor in the chiles. Soups along the boiled-and-mashed-parsnip spectrum would probably inflict damage more in the 7.50-8.0 range. But your results may vary: so I'll leave you all to your own experimentation.
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mrsparrasblog · 3 months
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Loser Simon
Tw: he is really pathetic, choking, stalking, masturbation, unprotected sex, baby trapping, micro penis,
A/N: credits to @dumbbitchgalore got inspired by her Pathetic Price fic
The light flickered in the dirty bathroom stall of the pub he went to after Price said they needed to celebrate their win. Well, it was his win; the others were just there. He had every reason to be cocky today. He was a handsome bloke with big muscles and perfect at his job. So when that bird approached him at the pub, which Johnny had eyed for hours, he thought, "Fuck it," and went with her into the dirty pub toilet.
His self-confidence struck again, too high. He should know by now what was about to happen when she removed his jeans, revealing his small member in contrast to his big size. Most of the time, the women or men started to laugh at him before they left. Some hoped he was a grower—he wasn’t. The worst was when a woman finally managed not to laugh, and he came in her face before she even put her lips on him. To a certain degree, he knew he was pathetic, but his confidence always got in his way, so he tried again and again, with the same result.
His sloppy lips licked hers, eager for her to grant his long tongue entrance. His big hands massaged the soft flesh of her ass before she went down on her knees, fighting with his belt. She was so eager, expecting the biggest dick she had ever seen from the 6’4" man. Unfortunately for Simon, she started to laugh when she saw his tiny package standing proud and already leaking precum like a faucet. "That's a joke," she said and just didn’t stop laughing at him, making him lose his cool. He wrapped his calloused hands around her delicate throat. He knew he wouldn’t kill her—he wasn’t a psychopath, after all. "If you tell anyone, I’ll fucking kill you," he threatened. Her laughing stopped and turned to an expression of pure fear as she nodded to keep his small secret.
"That was fast, mate," Gaz mentioned as Ghost returned to their booth.
"That bird was into crazy shit, and I don’t dip my dick in crazy," he replied, getting an approving nod from Price and Gaz, who had their fair share of crazy women over the years. But only Johnny raised his brow suspiciously. He always knew something was wrong with the Lt's sex life—not that he minded, but it was suspicious.
Price didn’t flirt with birds since he was still obsessed with his ex-wife, comparing every woman to Mrs. Price, who he cheated on in a moment of weakness. Kyle didn’t flirt with the girls or boys in the pub since he had a friends-with-benefits thing with you, the most beautiful nurse on base. Poor Kyle fell for you in that act. He himself flirted with every above-average attractive lad or lass who went into the pub, but Ghost—he never had a girl at home, and all the girls he took with him for fun returned minutes later with a traumatized look on their faces. Johnny was pretty sure the Lt was into some kinky stuff or was one of those guys who busted their load way too fast. He just knew something was wrong.
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He had half a mind to go to the brothel for his birthday to finally get over his fucking virginity. They were paid to do it, so they wouldn’t turn him down or laugh at him. His plans changed quickly when he saw you in front of his barrack, holding a cupcake with a candle in it, telling him "Happy Birthday" with that beautiful smile of yours. He really wanted to say thank you, but instead, he just looked at you and grumbled. You tried to lighten the mood by telling him you baked it yourself and that it was red velvet.
"How do you know I like red velvet?"
"You always choose red velvet over any other flavor when there are cookies in the mess hall," your eyes still shined as you held the delicious treat under his nose. He grabbed it without even saying a simple thank you and closed the door. Well, Kyle told you, you shouldn’t bring him something for his birthday. The Lt was weird and mean, was all he said. You should be happy if he didn’t spit in your face after trying your treats.
Kyle’s warning was fair. You shouldn’t have baked for the Lt—not because of his rude gestures. You just should never feed a stray dog, or it gets attached to you. And having that big broody Lieutenant attached to you was a death sentence you weren’t prepared for.
-------------------------------------------------------
Ghost knew he wasn’t a particularly good human, never was, and never would be. But right now, he felt like the worst human alive. Ever since you gave him that sweet treat, he was obsessed with you. It started innocently—he wanted to find out your name, your dislikes, your friends. It went a bit too far when he knew your blood type, bra size, and social security number. But that happens, okay? You need to forgive him for being so eager. It’s romantic, after all—or at least, that’s what he told himself.
But now he stood in your room while you were roaming around the base, his small dick in one hand and a pair of your used panties he nicked from the laundry bin in the other. The images of you weren’t enough anymore. He needed the real thing—needed to smell and taste you, finally make you his.
Your panties smelled so good to him. All thoughts of getting a prostitute flushed away. You’d be the one to take his virginity. You’re way too sweet to laugh at him. You’ll take him and love him—all his selfishness, the killing—you won’t care. You will love him just like he loves you.
Something was different. Your friends called you paranoid, but you couldn’t be. For a month, no guy hit on you, Kyle broke off your fuck buddy arrangement—god, you missed his dick—no CO yelled at you, you lost at least 20 pairs of your panties. Your pillow smelled weirdly no matter how often you washed it or even replaced it. Your shampoos and perfumes went empty. You were probably going crazy. Your friends were right.
You were already putting on your pajamas when the door rang. To your surprise, the Lieutenant stood in front of you. "We’re going on a date."
"Uh, how about you ask me first?" you argued. It wasn’t as if you didn’t want to—everyone around the base had a crush on him, and you kind of did too. But still, he could have asked.
He didn’t even answer and gave you a big bag. "In 30 minutes outside."
You went inside and opened the bag. To say you were shocked was an understatement of the year. Inside the bag was the black dress you eyed in the mall a month ago in your size, the YSL heels you pinned on Pinterest, and even a set of Victoria's Secret underwear. How did he know all this stuff? Maybe Kyle told him your size, you thought. And who are you to complain about free YSL heels?
The date was interesting. Simon—how you should call him from now on—didn’t talk much, but he was a good listener. He looked even hotter without the mask and paid for the bill without even a blink. If he had talked, it would have been the best date of your life.
Back at the base, he pushed you against the wall, claiming your mouth as his. Everything about him was big and clumsy. You tried to teach him that your nipples weren’t a trigger on a gun, and he was at least eager to learn—that’s more than you’d expect from most of your Tinder dates.
You were surprised when you pulled his dick out from his pants, and he wasn’t as big as everyone thought he would be. But hey, that’s okay. At least it wouldn’t hurt, you thought, as you slowly glided your cunt on his leaking cock. The sounds Simon made were heavenly—he didn’t hold back like other men. He was moaning and whimpering while you bounced on his dick, his heavy balls slapping against your ass.
His thick fingers drew circles around your clit, pulling moans from you. He was so attentive, focusing on your needs, and fuck, everything his dick lacked, his fingers could give you.
"Oh God, Simon," you whimpered as he increased the speed of his thick digits circling your pearl like no one ever did before. Making you cum wasn’t a side quest for him—it was everything that mattered right now.
"So good for me, Babygirl. Fuck, show me how much you love being filled out by me." Your cunt started to clench around him when he used that commanding voice on you. It didn’t take much for Simon to finally bust his load inside of you, heavy balls being emptied as you milked him for all he was worth.
"I love you, Babygirl," was all he muttered. You would have run away if you weren’t in an orgasmic bliss.
He was incredibly proud of himself for how long he lasted, and that you didn’t notice how he came in his pants after you kissed him for the first time. That could happen, okay?
Simon caressed your hair while you lay on top of his strong body. He was 1000% sure that he was going to marry you. You took his dick without laughing, and you’re so sweet. He should teach you to get rid of your naivety tho. Having sex without condoms on the first date—really, sweetheart? As if your sugar pills could prevent him from knocking you up.
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lycheedr3ams · 11 months
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ℑ𝔩𝔩 𝔐𝔢𝔱 𝔟𝔶 𝔐𝔬𝔬𝔫𝔩𝔦𝔤𝔥𝔱
werewolf!könig x fem!reader
Prologue | October 29th
Summary: You're a bakery worker in the small, isolated town of Heiligenblut, Austria. könig is a hunter and lumberjack who stays to himself and always has an aura of mystery and darkness. and through a series of strange circumstances, you're the one to uncover his secret. (set in the modern-day) CW: like all of my fanfics reader is fem she/her, adult content, predator/prey dynamics, werewolf-fucking, mentions of animal carcasses and blood, a bit unsettling at times. (can't think of anything else atm, this might count as dark content? not sure) WC: 1.8k
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your life had always been fairly predictable. your hometown was so small that most people knew everyone else's business, tourists came and went on schedules like birds migrating for winter, all stores in town were open from monday through saturday, the church bell rang at the top of every hour, you always baked the same things with the same ingredients each day.
and of course, you knew all the regular customers' routines. elderly customers would always come in the morning, schoolchildren in the mid afternoon, working mothers and courthouse employees during their lunch breaks. the labor-men of the town - lumberjacks, hunters, farmers - would always be the first people to show up at the bakery, even before the elderly, to get the freshest items. that was, all of the working men except for könig.
rather than get the freshest goods first thing in the morning, könig would instead come into the bakery the minute before closing. and each time, he came in sweaty and dirty to buy his typical goods: apfel strudel and hausbrot. unlike everyone else in town, könig seemed to have his own schedule. some weeks, he'd come every other day. other weeks, it would be two days in a row and then not until the fifth day. and some weeks, he'd only show up once or twice. könig was never predictable. you tried to learn his schedule when he'd come so that you could have his things ready for him by the time he got there, but it was hopeless with whatever personal clock he ran on. you had accidentally wasted a few strudels and loaves of bread a few times by setting them aside for könig, only for him not to follow the schedule you thought he had. you eventually gave up on predicting his routine, if he even had one.
also unlike most other customers, könig did not speak aside from a greeting or two for politeness. most customers would talk about the weather, the harvest, town gossip. but könig would come in, nod his head to acknowledge you, and say "guten nacht" as he left. and he learned that he didn't need to say his order after a month of you working at the bakery, since he always got the same things each time. he was secretly grateful that you were so observant and had a good memory, because it saved him from speaking too much. you didn't even need to tell him the total anymore, because it was the same every time. he'd hand you the money, and leave. he also never took off the black bandana that he tied around his nose, covering everything except his eyes.
you had heard the townspeople speak of him in admiration laced with fear. könig lived alone in a small cabin a little ways from town, surrounded by the woods. he took up apprenticeship with the local lumberjack when he was 17, and was hunting since he was a boy. he could chop entire trees down with only a few swift swings of his large axe, and could carry whole logs on each of his shoulders. and könig was, with no arguments, the most skilled hunter around. but no one had ever seen him hunt. many young men had approached him, wishing to become his apprentice, but he turned each one down. fathers came begging to him, offering copious amounts of money and supplies if konig could just teach their sons to be half the hunter he was. but konig always said no. there were rumors about the reason why: maybe he strangled his prey with his bare hands, or hunted them with only a knife. or maybe his methods were sacred family tradition, not meant to be shared with anyone. whatever the case, all everyone knew was that könig always had the largest harvest, and the town was never short on meat.
könig always seemed on edge. suspicious. he was never seen out much other than for work and to buy food. sometimes, the townspeople would ask you worriedly if könig had ever caused you any trouble when he came into the bakery at night. you always assured everyone who asked that könig had never caused you any trouble at all. but what you couldn't tell them was that you always had a crush on the brooding, mysterious giant. how could you not be allured by his strength and sheer masculinity? but that was something you always kept to yourself. you had to, because you were sure that the town's most feared and respected man never thought about you other than when you were handing him his baked goods. so you forced yourself to swallow your feelings for him, even though a bright blush would always creep across your cheeks when he came into the bakery, and your panties were always wet after he left. but you didn't know if he even noticed the way you'd shyly blush, only for him.
...
The town was getting ready for the annual Halloween festival, which was one of the largest festivals your town boasted. large pumpkins, countless strawbales, gourds, and squash were harvested from the farms with the most to offer and scattered around the main area of town for the entire month of October. and at night when the sun would set, orange and yellow lights draped across the streetlamps would glimmer in the dark, getting everyone - especially the children - excited for halloween.
the halloween festival culminated in a large feast on halloween night, at exactly 9pm sharp. large wooden tables made from the very trees surrounding the town would be brought to the town square, donned with tablecloths, and adorned with the best harvest the town had to offer. hams, sausages, venison, and beef were aplenty during the festival each year, thanks to könig. your bakery was responsible for supplying the pastries and other sweets, and the farmers for their vegetables. the elderly women would make stews and other warm meals, and the entire town would gather to celebrate halloween and let the children run free. it was because of this festival that october was one of the busiest months out of the year for the town.
but this year, there were rumors beginning to spread.
October 28th
an elderly man came into the bakery on a slow day and chatted with you as you packed his order. he smiled kindly at you, then looked around to ensure no one else was in the bakery.
"have you heard the word around, miss?" the old man asked. you boxed up his pastries and shook your head. "what word? there's always so much going on in this town." you smiled. but your smile quickly faded when you saw the serious look in the man's eyes. he whispered lowly when he spoke.
"word is, the hunter hasn't yet turned in any meat for festival, and it's only in a few days now."
you tilted your head in confusion. "i'm sorry, did I hear you right? könig hasn't turned in any meat at all?" the old man seemed to almost shudder when you said könig's name. "no miss, no meat at all. some say he's lost his touch, others think it's because of a pack of wolves that's made its way into the woods around town this last week."
"a pack of wolves?" you asked. "we haven't had wolves around here for so long, thanks to the men of the village protecting us." the old man shook his head. "no miss, we've been hearing howls at night for the last few weeks. i thought everyone had known about it by now. but it seems no one wants to talk about it."
you thought for a moment. könig hadn't turned in any meat for the festival? that was possibly the strangest sentence you had ever heard. such a thing could not be possible. you cleared your throat. "so what are we going to do for the festival's meat?" the old man shrugged. "i'm not sure miss. some farmers have been talkin' bout offering some of their livestock, but we'd like to avoid that to make it through winter."
your conversation abruptly ended when the hunter himself walked into the bakery and cast it in darkness, like clouds covering the bright full moon. you stared at könig, wide-eyed, for a moment, before smiling at him. "hello. i'll have your order ready in a moment."
the old man fumbled in his pocket and left the money on the counter before you could even open the cash register. he tipped his hat to könig and made a speedy exit with his pastry box tucked under his arm. why did everyone seem so afraid of könig, you wondered?
"that was odd," you smiled a bit to ease the awkward silence that had settled after the old man had hastily left. könig didn't respond, only staring at you with an inscrutable look. you looked at him back, feeling like you were face-to-face with some beast in the woods. the hairs on the back of your neck tingled, and you began to notice little abnormalities in his appearance. but before you could absorb exactly what was different about his appearance, the clock chimed for closing time. you jumped slightly, the tension between you and könig now broken as you looked at the clock. you took a shaky breath in and didn't look at him again as you packed up his order.
könig had already set the money on the counter before you put down his box, and he took the box from your hands before you could place it on the counter. he swiftly turned to leave, his shoulders seeming tense. and it was almost like someone else took control over your body when you forced your now meek voice to speak. "könig? are you okay?"
könig stopped within arm's reach of the bakery door, his wide shoulders spanning the width of the door itself. he slowly turned his head back to look at you, and again you felt like you were confronting a wild beast in the forest. the energy coming off of him felt dark and grim, and the only thing that could be heard was the ticking of the cuckoo clock and your shaky breathing.
"guten nacht," he said gruffly before leaving, the little bell attached to the door chiming in his wake.
you held your breath for a moment longer after he left, your heart hammering in your chest, before you heaved one large breath. you had never felt such tension and fear in your life. you placed your hand over your heart, trying to calm yourself down as you placed your other hand against the countertop for support.
you ran home from the bakery that night, plagued by the feeling that you were being chased.
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i hope you guys liked the prologue! it's taken me a while to decide where i want the plot to go, but now i know and expect more soon!
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dhampling · 6 months
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sun astarion x reader drabble
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Granted, only for a few hours; until morning at most - but there’s a genuine relief when your compatriots want to scatter across the town and leave you be. 
All except for him. 
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wc: 600+
Blistering.
Eyes closed, toes outstretched - free from the confines of all leather and the tough of a sole long-battered - heels heavy in the fresh grass, the new soil. 
There’s a moment where all the air carries is far-off laughter and the smell of woodsmoke. 
You can’t say you’ve ever spent much time in Rivington - if any, at all. It’s charming in some lice-ridden rickety fashion, akin to other small towns you’ve travelled through in your time; and in prime position under the sun it simply bakes. Smoulders. Dirt paths trodden with clouds of pale puff, shoes laced with thick dry creases of dust. Warm ash on the waning breeze. 
The birds chirp in a dot-smatter overhead. Sky blue and vast and baking in the swell of the midday heat.
And it’s here you decide you’ll stay.
Granted, only for a few hours; until morning at most - but there’s a genuine relief when your compatriots want to scatter across the town and leave you be. 
All except for him. 
His first few tenday spells of day in two hundred years and he understandably basks in it. Pallid, occasionally wounded by the tender curse of long sun-reddened flesh for some small while before the skin heals over and his whinging stops. Forearm over forehead, eyes half-squinting; the gentle cant of his head toward yours on the lolling hill.
Astarion is quiet. It’s understandable. In a few long nights once reaching the Gate, he may have to relinquish his freedom once more. Give himself to the shadows, to the endless night; some awful routine of the moon rising as the stars sparkle overhead and the memory of every ounce of self-control leaving his corpse for the hunt. 
Granted, his centuries of plight will no longer be a problem. You’ll die if it ensures he’s free. Unspoken but he’s safe in the knowledge you won’t leave him behind. You won’t forget his struggle. You hold every ounce of his deliverance in safe hands and you’ve proven yourself time and time again to be in his corner.
“I’ll come with you, you know.”
A soft whispering into the sun; and you feel him shift to turn his head fully to you, still squinting; heat radiating from softened cheeks and lashes fluttering at the high of his cheek.
“Hm?”
“If you want me to. Whatever happens next.”
He offers some noncommittal hum and blinks slowly, wriggling a little to lay on his side with arms outstretched toward you.
“Come to me, lover. Please.”
You shuffle closer and rest a head on the hot skin of his inner arm, lips dipping to kiss your head.
“I mean it, Astarion.”
“I know. I do.”
A sleep-heavy sigh of contentment as he holds you still.  
“A house. Here. Thoughts?”
You wrinkle your nose.
“Why?”
“Why not?”
“I can’t see you settling here.”
“I could definitely settle here, if I wanted to. Little house. Little... pets.” 
His fingers flutter on the peachy low of your cheek. You groan.
“You’ve got a lot of life to live. Rivington shouldn’t factor into that, love.”
“Oh, I know. I’m familiar. However, it has a certain charm by day that I’d never seen before now. Cobble all… warm, underfoot. It’s nice.”
You grin.
“You’re the pet. A fat housecat.”
“I’m not fat.”
“No, but if you keep feeding on me the way you are doing, then that will change.”
He taps you playfully then pauses, before softly nuzzling his face deeper into the warmth of your hair. 
“That or the wine, I suppose. I’m a creature of comfort.”
“You’re a creature. Full stop.”
-
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syndxlla · 1 year
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best friends don’t look at each other the way we do
A low stakes, high reward, and self-indulgent Zelink fan fiction. Canon-compliant. Takes place between BOTW and TOTK.
Heavily inspired by my Zelink thoughts
I wanted to dig into the dirty, grimly reality of being the saviors of the world and not knowing how to be the savior of yourself. But you can find that safety in another person.
Fan fiction warnings: Canon-typical violence, eventual smut (in later chapters, characters are consenting adults), references to self-harm, eating-disorders, and a lot of angst. Each chapter will have chapter-specific warnings.
Chapter one: I used to tie your shoes
Song: We’ll never have sex by Leith Ross
Summary: Fresh off Hyrule Field, Link and Zelda have to face life after the Calamity, and come to terms with the long road to physical, emotional, and mental recovery.
Warnings: Vomiting, trauma, canon-typical violence, eating-sensitivity
Word count: 3.7k words
Author’s Note: I am so excited to share this. Please share and support this in anyway. I drew this art for the cover :) chapter begins after the page break. I love you guys. Also, these chapters won’t be heavily edited. Ignore any grammatical/spelling errors pls
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Time. We never seem to have enough time. Green grass burns soft red embers into the field, a horse’s mane is rebraided at the nearest stable, and the stars shine as if nothing changed. Because it hadn’t, not really. The sun will still rise in the east and set in the west. The birds will still sing their songs at daybreak and the fireflies will still flicker at dusk. Nothing changed, but everything did. The air feels lighter, the sun feels warmer and yet Zelda’s fingers still shake as if she was in the snowy Hebra peaks.
The Princess by nature, is very gentle. She’s soft and patient at heart, but was placed under such strenuous situations all through her youth that caused her to often snap or lash out. But not now. Currently she is silent, stone-cold and confused. She was in shock. And Link could tell.
“Here.” He pulls out a baked apple from his pack, handing it to her. He has to get her attention twice before she finally takes it, their hands brushing for a moment. Her awareness returns to her gaze then, her bright-green eyes meeting his.
“I-I’m so sorry.” She sighs, her voice weak. “I’m just… so tired.” Link tries not to show his distress, but she notices his demeanor change as well. “How much further?” She says, rubbing her eyes sleepily.
“Probably another hour and a half. It’s just through those mountains.” He points.
“Dueling peaks. I remember.” She nods. “I remember everything.”
“Everything?” He asks as he starts to dig around a pack on the rear end of Epona, searching for his rito attire. It was starting to get dark, and she hadn’t stopped shaking since they left Castle Town almost three hours ago.
Zelda nods once.
Her silence speaks volumes.
He yanks out his snowquill armor, finally. “Do you remember anything from the last hundred years?” She doesn’t answer right away, she instead takes a smaller than small bite out of the apple. “Zel? Can I put this on you? You’re still shivering.” He asks, looking at her blank, traumatized stare. “It’s from the Rito, it’s soft as a cloud and will keep you warm for the rest of the way.”
“The Rito.” She sighs. “Revali…”
Link realizes that she hasn’t had any time to process what she just went through. She had spent the last one hundred years deeply focused, probably in a trance-like state. He places a hand on her cheek. “Look at me.” His voice is gentle and welcoming, not forcing her at all. She looks at him, their eyes locking. “Breathe with me.”
They take two deep, heavy breaths. They sync their inhales, exhaling together.
“It’s over. It’s all over, okay?” He reassures her. “It’s not coming back. It’s just us now, alright?”
She swallows, still emotionless. “You’ve changed.” She says.
“So have you.” Link smiles in an attempt to comfort her. “Can I put this shirt on you?” He asks again. She answers faster than she usually had, nodding twice this time. Link bunches up the excess fabric before pulling the head-opening over her hair. He then guides each one of her hands through the arm-holes. Link takes a moment to adjust the garb around her torso until it was probably positioned around her shaking body. She immediately sighs in relief.
“You talk more.” She mumbles, looking at him as he gently wraps his fingers around her long, golden hair and softly pulls it out of the shirt, knowing how much it irritates him when his hair is loose underneath a shirt.
He smiles again, “I do. Some people say I don’t shut up.” He tries to lighten the mood.
“Like who?”
“Impa.” He sighs.
Zelda’s eyes light up with that name. “Impa?”
He hums and nods. “We can go visit her when you’re feeling stronger, okay?”
“Okay…” Zelda looked down into her lap, the skirt of her goddess dress was barely white anymore. “I am going to get stronger, right?” She asks, her voice tender and broken.
Link’s heart sinks. Not because he’s worried she won’t, but rather because he feels responsible for putting her in this state.
“Of course.” He reassures. He believed it. He wanted to believe it.
“I’m… just so tired.” She repeats herself.
“I know, come on, let's get you a bed.” He then picks her up bridal style from the ground. They had stopped in the first place to get that rito armor for her. She rests her head against his chest as he lifts her onto Epona. She smells like burnt oil and exhaustion. He probably isn’t smelling any better.
They wouldn’t get to Hateno until noon at the earliest tomorrow, and traveling wasn’t doing anything for her recovery. He gets on Epona behind her, letting her weak body rest against his chest as they make their way to Dueling Peaks Stable. The road is quiet, so much quieter than it ever has been. The pair of lizalfos always swimming in the river aren’t there, and even the crickets suppress their chirps.
It’s post-apocalyptic. Literally. Link isn’t sure how to feel.
She throws up a few hundred feet from the stable. She gags and lurches over the side of the horse, somehow managing to keep it off of anyone. Not much comes out, she hasn’t eaten in over a century, but Link frowns when he realizes the apple probably triggered it. He silently curses himself out for causing her any form of distress. She dry heaves violently, and Link tries to hold her shoulder in an attempt to comfort her. When she finishes, she holds her breath.
She can’t decide if she feels like she lost a bit of dignity or not. She holds back the tears that well in her eyes. Link breathes in to say something, but she raises her hand in protest. She would rather they act like it never happened. Neither of them say anything from there on, they just keep riding the final minute of the journey.
Everyone at the stable was asleep except for an attendant… who was also treading precariously between consciousness and a deep rest behind the counter.
“Excuse me?” Link asks to wake him up, hopping off of Epona after making sure Zelda would still be comfortable in his absence. She would never admit she wasn’t.
The man stirs awake with a jolt. He yawns, slightly startled, “So sorry, young man.” Link wouldn’t necessarily call himself young. He smirks softly.
“I’d like to board this horse till the morning, and we’d like one soft bed, please.” Link nods before setting down the required rupees. The man squints his eyes, taking the money in hand.
“Ah! It’s you! Link, was it?” He asks when Link turns his back to help Zelda down from the horse. “Jeez, you haven’t passed through here in at least six months! We were holding onto that old mare for you!” He gestures to their stables where a small gray spotted horse sleeps. Link’s first horse since he woke up from his century-long slumber. He only rode her in the beginning, when he was doing chores between Hateno, Kakariko and one time a longer trip to Zora’s Domain. But she’s old and weak, which is why she was easy to catch when Link was still regaining his strength. He stopped taking her out when he found Epona in the western part of Central Hyrule.
“Yeah… you guys can let her free.” He says as he sets Zelda down on the ground. She holds her cold hands together.
“Well uhh.. we tried. You see, after four months at a stable we let go of any forgotten pony’s, but she kept coming back.” He chuckled, his voice exhibiting a distinctive nasality.
“Here,” Link hands him a red rupee, not wanting to discuss an old horse any longer when he literally has the closest thing to a God in this world resting her head on his back. “Keep her for another month, I’ll come take care of her then. Okay?” Link asks. “Can I get that bed now?” Not impolite or forceful, he never was. He’s assertive but has a comforting cadence to his tone. For being such a talented swordsman, guard and easily the most deadly hylian in the entire kingdom, he was never rude or condescending. He was welcoming, and little kids often looked up at him with intimidation when they first met him, but it didn’t ever take long until they were chasing him with tree-branches while he fled and begged for mercy, letting them take him down with ease. The kids at the stables loved him, knew him by name, and would play as him in their silly pretend games.
The stable-man replies, “Of course! But you only asked for one bed, it’s not big enough to fit both of you.”
“I know, it’s for her not me.” Link then starts to guide her into the stable, where it’s much warmer and safer. Just because it’s quiet doesn’t mean it's safe. Hyrule is a dangerous place by nature, especially if you’re two century-old Gods being hunted for sport with the faces of children.
“You won’t sleep?” Zelda asks quietly behind him.
He doesn’t directly answer, and instead guides her to the bed. She’s weary, and he’s terrified of her not waking up. He wouldn’t be able to sleep even if he wanted to. He helps the Princess sit in the bed, and kneels before her to untie her sandals. When he touches the leather, he immediately gets transported into another memory.
It rips through him, just like the memories he had images of. Suddenly, he’s kneeling in the same position, but instead he was outside of the spring of courage. He looks up to see the clear sky, it’s sunset, and then his eyes meet Zeldas. Her face is rosy, and her eyes don’t have the blank stare they possess in the current time. He looks down at his fingers, tying the straps around her ankle.
“Really, you don’t have to do that.” She hums. He doesn’t respond. He never did back then. He finishes wrapping the leather around itself and then stands up. His face is emotionless. She looks at him, they’re about the same height. “I won’t be long this time.” She says. “I’m not expecting much anyways.” She sighs and then walks past him, but before she can get very far, he gently grabs onto her arm, holding her back. He doesn’t say anything but she can read his expression. He’s trying to tell her to have faith this time, just one more time.
Surely the Goddess would commune with her.
She shakes her head, and wades into the warm waters of the spring. Link turns to watch her, how her hair cascaded down her back, how her hands balled into fists. She turns around to look at him, their eyes meet. She smiles.
He comes back as fast as the scene played in his memory. He blinks a few times, and looks up at her. She doesn’t look any different, very little—if any—time seemed to pass. He doesn’t usually experience memories with someone, he wonders if she realized anything happened. Link didn’t even consider the fact he would keep receiving memories after the fact. His stomach turns, he feels like he’s lived two completely different lives and is forced to remember things from one that he doesn’t even relate to anymore. He doesn’t feel like the same person, the boy he was a hundred years ago is a complete stranger to him.
Link much preferred this life.
And that scares Zelda.
“I just remembered something.” He says. Zelda hums in response, a light-hearted noise that implies an inquiry. He elaborates, “I used to tie your sandals for you at the springs, didn’t I?” He asks.
Zelda smiles for the first time since they defeated Ganon. It’s a small pull of her lips, not showing any teeth but her eyes finally light back up. After she had asked if he remembered her on the field, she collapsed, not even aware of her own exhaustion until that moment. He ran to her aid, and ever since then she felt woozy, it only got worse the further from the castle they got.
“You did, yes.” She says. “I never asked you to, but since I was in the dress, you insisted.” She sighs. Link grunts in response. “It was very chivalrous.” Zelda adds.
They look at each other for a minute. Not saying anything. It was late, and two beds down there was a set of kid brothers sleeping. Link remembered them from their last visit. One of them wanted nothing to do with him, trying to act mature and ‘cool’. Link eventually won him over, though. They don’t speak out of fear of waking anyone. Zelda’s smile slowly fades away, and Link swallows thickly. They will never be the same.
He pulls her sandals off, her feet are filthy with century-old mud. He silently smiles about that. The closest thing to a Goddess in the entire world has dirty feet. How human of her.
Then, after pulling down the heavy rito-down blanket so she can slide in, he helps Zelda swing her legs into the bed. He pulls the blanket up to her neck, she lays on her side facing him. Her hands find their way up to her face, resting her cheek against them. Link pulls a short stool over to the bed, sitting on it and looking at her, bending at the waist.
“You’re not going to leave me, are you?” She asks in a timid, sleepy voice.
Link’s heart just about breaks when she asks. “Never.” He shakes his head. He takes his gloved hand and tucks a piece of her loose hair behind her pointed-ears. He lets his fingers linger a little bit longer than they should. “I will never ever leave you again.”
“Promise?” She asks, her eyes heavy with exhaustion.
“Promise.” He whispers, “Just as long as you promise to never leave me, okay?” He asks, ignoring the lump in this throat.
“Promise.” She says, taking her pinky finger and sticking it out for him. He wraps his finger with hers, which is far daintier and softer than he's ever been. She is a Princess, after all.
“Wake up in the morning, okay?” He whispers.
“Mhm.” She hums as her eyes slowly close. He tries to disconnect their pinky fingers, but she holds onto his. He leaves his hand in that position, letting her hold it until she falls fast asleep.
Link doesn’t move his hand until he’s certain it won’t wake her up from her much needed rest. He looks at her gentle, soft face. No one even understands what she just went through, no one ever will. He’s worried sick that she won’t make it through the night, and he keeps leaning his head down to listen to her breathing, or places a few fingers against her forehead to check her temperature.
He does his best to stay vigilant the entire night, not once even looking away from her. But just before the sun rises, his body suddenly catches up with his mind. He also just had the most demanding battle of his life. His muscles started to ache, and he developed a headache. He was just a boy, after all. More than anything, his sword arm was weak, and fire-hot pain shot up and down through it. He probably overused it fightin the calamity.
He keeps telling himself that he’s fine. He has to be fine, for Zelda. His arm isn’t that bad, what really hurts was his heart. Usually he’d just down a fairy tonic and maybe go to the hot springs if he was in the area but this pain was different. A twisting and contracting ache in his chest pulled and tugged on his lungs and pulse. It’s the same pain he felt when he remembered Mipha, and more specifically, the pain he felt when he dreamed about his family before the resurrection.
The dream that gave him the memories of a little sister with blonde hair like his collecting fireflies in her pockets. Her laugh echoing, the call of an older man, the image of a royal guards sword leaned up against the dinner table. The touch of his father’s hand as he rubs Link’s back to sleep.
Link’s first sword.
He wakes up like a fire, standing up and almost toppling over. He didn’t even realize he had fallen asleep. He could hear the soft tune of the penny whistle playing the standard stable theme, and the two little brothers played tag outside. He curses and looks down at Zelda.
Her bed is empty, and his heart completely stops. He starts breathing hard and heavy, his entire nervous system feels as though it’s pulled into stasis. How could he make such a foolish mistake? He swings his sword over his back, strapping his shield to his leathers and turns around in a wild-hunt to see the Princess sitting at the round stable table, drinking out of a mug and speaking gently with an older man.
Link takes a breath of relief, and approaches the two.
“Good Morning.” She smiles up at him. Her voice sounded much better, and her eyes finally had life back into them, but she still wasn’t herself. Her skin still looked sickly, her face hollowed out and eyes droopy. Any progress is good progress, Link decides then and there.
“I… didn’t mean to fall asleep.” Link sighs. “I’m so sorry. When did you wake up?”
“Oh not long ago, maybe twenty minutes? I didn’t want to disturb you-”
“You should have.” He interrupts her and her words get swallowed out of surprise. Link realizes that he snapped at her a little, and immediately becomes apologetic. “I’m sorry, again. I just…”
“You’re worried about me. I understand.” She takes his hand, her bones frail. In many ways, she physically looked worse today than last night. But at least she could hold a conversation. He nods. Zelda notices the tension, and changes the subject, “This kind gentleman was telling me about when you saved the stable from a horde of lizalfos about a year ago.”
Link looks over at the man, Giahzo. “Oh that was nothing, it was just two green lizalfos and a blue one who wandered too close to the stable.” Link hums. Their hands were still held together by Zelda.
“Don’t be so modest!” The old man chuckled, “Without you, it would have been a disaster! The number of monsters means nothing, especially when you don’t know how to fight!”
“That’s very kind of you.” Link smiles and then realizes he and Zeldas hands, he’s the one to pull it away. “What are you drinking?”
“I’m not sure…” Zelda begins and Link immediately snatches the mug from her hand. “Hey!”
“You can’t just drink something mysterious.” Link scolds.
“Oh it’s just a bit of Hateno Milk.” The man assures. Link looks at him, then Zelda, and then into the mug to see the creamy liquid. He brings it to his nose and smells it, and then takes a sip of it. Sure enough, it was just milk.
“I’m sorry, Giahzo.” He apologizes and places the mug back down. “I’m just on high alert.”
“Do not apologize to me, apologize to this lovely young lady you’ve graced us with.” The elderly man smiles with a chuckle, his eyes wrinkling up with his age. Zelda smiles, blushing a little, “Tell me, dear, where are you from? We don’t get many new faces at this stable these days.”
Zelda looks at him, her eyes sad. A hundred years ago every person in Hyrule knew her face. She looks at Link, unsure how to answer.
“She’s from the Outskirts stable.” Link covers for her. “Her family used to reside in Central Hyrule before the Calamity.”
“Yes.” Zelda immediately chirps, “We’re headed to Hateno for…”
“A honeymoon!?” Giahzo smiles brightly. Both Link and Zelda freeze in their tracks, and Link hopes he doesn’t look as embarrassed as he feels. “Hateno is a great Honeymoon destination! Although I’ve heard Lureline is even more splendid!” He clasps his hands together.
“Research.” Zelda clarifies, “so sorry to disappoint.” She chuckles politely, making a conscious effort not to look at Link. “I’m researching… population dynamics in Hyrule.” She makes something up that sounds completely believable.
“Of course.” Link then says, “I’m just escorting her there, we are total strangers.”
That breaks Zelda’s heart.
She knows he’s just trying to be extra careful, pushing her anonymity as much as possible. And in a way, it wasn’t a total lie. But it cut her like a knife.
“I see…” Giahzo doesn’t seem convinced. “Well, if you ever need anything, don’t hesitate to stop by. Hopefully the monsters will start to die down.” He smiles and stands up, moving outside.
Zelda is still afraid to look at Link, and he’s a little bit shaken up by the entire interaction. He knows the Yiga are still out there, he knows that there are people who will try to take advantage of her for power or money. He has no reason to suspect anything from the old man, but he can’t help himself from being deliberate. He senses her tension and walks back to the bed to gather their things.
“You should have woken me up.” Link says as he picks up a satchel full of food and readjusts his gloves.
“I’m sorry.” Her voice was timid and tired. He turns around to see her, her green eyes looking up at him apologetically. “I didn’t know it would worry you so.” He approaches her.
“Of course it worries me.” He sighs. “I spent three years trying to get you out of that castle, I’m not gonna lose you on the first night.” He holds his hand out for her to trade, helping her up. She must not have rested as well as he thought, because as soon as she gets on her feet, she almost topples right over him. He catches her, holding her up before she collapses. “Woah there.” He mutters. “You alright?”
She nods, “Let’s just get to that house you told me about.”
chapter two
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mueritos · 7 months
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i hope we continue to see more protests within the US military. i see a lot of leftists and folks who are anti-military who have such an open disdain for the people who are in the military, yet neglect to considering the conditions this country makes to produce ideology, poverty, and the illusion of choice to make all kinds of people choose to enlist in the military. You ever see those videos of ROTC kids recording each other asking why they joined the military and everyone's like, "healthcare", "it helped me go to college", "I was bored" or "free ptsd lol". I hate to remind everyone but folks who are in the military are people, too, and they are the same victims and perpetrators of violence as the rest of you, we have all been shallowly conditioned to view each other as enemies just because one person is wearing army greens and the other is not.
some of the biggest anti-war advocates are those who engaged in war. Veterans who genuinely believed they were protecting the US against "terrorism" come back with blood on their hands, and they choose to realize that it was US imperialism that forced them to carry out violence, instead of doubling down and shielding themselves from the fact that they too are capable of atrocities... This is a class of people who are intentionally conditioned to be as poor and as ideologically aligned to US imperialism so that the military has a never-ending pool to send their youth to destroy other country's youth. The only people I have ever heard say "do not join the military" are those who ARE military.
This is in no way to ever excuse or explain away any of the atrocious war crimes and violence this industry and its people have committed against others. What I am saying is that we absolutely cannot cast aside the individuals who have been victimized within US imperialism, even if they are wearing army greens. I was speaking with my Palestinian classmate last week and another classmate--a member of the US air force-- walked up to me and struck up a conversation. My military classmate showed me her new bird, bid both of us goodbye, and left. My Palestinian classmate asked me if I was close with her, and I said we talked quite often, and she said, "I never met a person who's in the military. I still hate the military, but I never knew that they did, too. I didn't realize that they were also victims."
If my Palestinian classmate--one who is actively watching her own community die--can understand that it is not individuals who are the problem but it is in fact systems, US imperialism, white supremacy, capitalism...why can't we all? And she has EVERY reason to hate any individual military member. A lot of online activism just creates more barriers. if your optics look bad, complicated, or contradictory, you are cast aside. Everyone has got the be the perfect activist, you can never make a mistake or share a half-baked thought, you should always believe every word from a marginalized persons mouth (because being marginalized doesn't mean you're not entrenched in white supremacy too!) and you should never question what you see...Do you know what you sound like? The very imperialists who are convincing poor whites to vote against themselves. Perfectionism is white supremacy. Black & white thinking is white supremacy.
I'd rather have a military member who genuinely believed in the US imperialism machine but was disillusioned after being deployed as my comrade than some leftist who cherishes the performance of "being a good person". I don't want "good people" in our movements. I want humans who care. I want humans who make mistakes and who learn from them. I want humans who accept the messiness of a person. I want humans who hold others accountable and allow themselves to take responsibility for their actions. I want people who change for themselves and others.
fight systems, not individual people. we can change each other, but if we're too preoccupied looking like the World's Perfect Activists, we will only consume each other alive. Connect to your fellow humans, forever and always.
#muertotalks#a mind dump after seeing so much come out after the self immolation of the us air force member#i know hes not the first one to self immolate for palestine#and he might not be the last#i hate the military#i really fucking do#but i choose to see the people within them as victims within the overall system just like the rest of us#i will never go through what they did to make them choose to enlist#i never struggled with poverty homelessness healthcare or social acceptance#i wont shame them#shame is not productive#i want them to know there are civilians who support their protests#i want them to know that we their allies too#a note on my palestinian classmate#if youre arab or also a colonized person impacted by the us military feel free to hate every member of the military#i dont intend to police yall in how you choose to feel your anger#im angry with you#the point i mean to make is about understanding and compassion#someone who has every right to hate these people still chose to see them as the people they are#yes i even want the best for the “bad” people in the military too#i dont want these people to continue the ideology but we cant stop that without dismantling these systems#and we cant do that without creating spaces for healing and reform and growth#so many thoughts so many thoughts#none of this is easy#i fight daily against impulsively hating the world#everyday is a fight to choose compassion and understanding#but being a leftist and doing leftism is not fucking easy#if you genuinely think it is it isnt#and you may be missing the point of what leftism is#anyway
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ryderdire · 1 year
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I think l one of the reasons that so many queer people related to and wanted to be wolves as kids is because their so small and yet so tightly nit there’s somthing alluring about that when your a kid and literally everyone thinks ur a freak somtimes including your parents and the only real positive human connection you get is online which is vast and often non personal and terrifying
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Oswald
After your hippogriff injures his wing, you send a letter to your old friend Newt Scamander, asking for help. Will it spark up old feelings?
Newt Scamander x F!Reader
My first fic with him, so I apologize if it’s bad but for the release of Hogwart’s Legacy, I felt the need to try💖
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He hasn’t seen or heard from you in years. Ever since you guys left Hogwarts, contact with each other kind of faded. You’ve been busy with magical beasts, like him, going to remote locations to do so, even discovering a new one. As a Ravenclaw, he knows that your studies matter before all else, but Newt hoped that you guys would keep some sort of contact.
Of course, he could’ve sent you something, but he was too nervous.
Newt had a crush on you back when you guys were fifth years. You seem to care for creatures just like he did. He’s always wanted to say something, but he was too shy. Then you guys grew up and Newt became busy with his own work. Right now, he was back in America after his brother pulled some tough strings to allow him to travel internationally again.
“What’ll it be this time Newt?” Jacob asked his friend from behind the counter. The magizoologist was in the bakery, leaning against the counter with his case by his feet. Deep in thought, he jumped a bit at the voice.
“O-Oh...just the usual, Jacob.” Newt said while also bending down to clip shut one of the locks on his case, which flipped open for a second,
“Oh come on. But that’s so boring.” The man before him tried to push Newt to get something else, anything that he has put more time into, but the wizard wouldn’t have it.
“My usual, please.” Newt said while flashing a tiny smile. Jacob just sighed before grabbing him a blueberry muffin. He grabbed the baked good and began to unwrap when the sudden sound of something hitting the window startled both him, Jacob, and every other customer in the building. Turning around, Newt recognized your owl sliding down the glass. 
He quickly rushed outside, where your owl had come to its senses. The bird fluffed its feathers a bit as Newt offered his arm as a perch. The owl flew up there and landed, and that’s when the wizard realized there was a note tied to its leg. 
With shaky hands, he undid and read the letter...
“Newt! Where are you going?” Jacob voiced when the wizard rushed back into the bakery and grabbed his suitcase before rushing out again. Your owl has since vanished.
“I need to get to Scotland.” Newt replied, not stopping his gait. As he left the store, Jacob continued to follow, mumbling “Scotland” under his breath with a confused face. However, as he was wondering about that, Newt was already far ahead of him.
“Wait! Newt! Aren’t you gonna pay-” Jacob called out, but Newt had pulled out his wand and apparated.
“...Never mind.” He then mumbled before walking back into his bakery, trying to calm the public down while also generating loud excuses as for what just happened...
Newt landed in a forest. Based on the smell and surrounding vegetation, he would say that he reached his destination. Your letter said that you would be in this area, so he began walking. It didn’t state much besides that you had an injured creature on your hands. He didn’t know what he would be walking into, but at least his case would have everything that he might need. A small chirp in his pocket made him look down to see a dazed and confused Pickett.
“Sorry about that Pickett. Nearly there I believe.” Newt said to the bowtruckle, looking down. 
Around a half hour or so, Newt left the cover of the trees and found himself on a dirt path. Upon following it for a bit, he was led to a grassy clearing that had a broken-down wooden cabin and barn. But that wasn’t what caught his attention and stole his breath away.
An onyx-colored hippogriff was laying in front of the barn with you by its side, gently stroking its feathers.
“H-Hello Y/N...” Newt said nervously, catching your attention. You looked over at him and it stole his breath away. You were still just as beautiful as all those years ago if not more so.
“It’s good to see you again Newt.” You said softly, smiling a bit. The hippogriff next to you lifted its head, noticing the wizard. Newt set his case down and lowered his body slightly in a bow, but the hippogriff didn’t seem to care as it got to its feet and hissed at him.
“Oswald! Stop!” You shouted at the beast as he clawed at the ground. Newt bowed even more in hopes it would appease the hippogriff and keep it from attacking, remaining calm as he did so. 
But as the hippogriff spread open his wings to show dominance, he squawked in pain before falling back to his feet, where you began to pet him again.
“What happened to him?” Newt asked, concern for your beast overtaking any nervousness he has around you. Upon further inspection, he realized that the hippogriff’s left wing was bent awkwardly. You scootched a bit so he could crouch down next to you.
Close to you.
“He likes to fly, but I can’t always be with him. One time when he went out, he didn’t return for a while. Finally came back, but on foot. I noticed the wing and how his behavior changed each time I touched it.” You explained to him, keeping Oswald calm as Newt examined it. Your hippogriff seemed to calm down, sensing now that you trust this man to help him.
“I’m not to good with injured beasts, especially wings, I thought that you would know what to do...and I knew it would be nice to see you again.” You said with a smile, petting Oswald’s flank as the hippogriff shut his eyes. Newt nearly stopped breathing at your words but managed to compose himself for the sake of the injured creature in front of him.
“Yes, me too, I also am...I mean, I do know how to help him.” Newt struggled with his words, causing you to giggle a bit and his face to flush red.
A bit of prodding and beak-snapping later, Newt managed to secure and set your hippogriff’s wing. Give him around a month or more, and he’ll be back up in the skies in no time. A broken wing was indeed the culprit.
“Oswald...is he yours?” Newt asked as he watched the hippogriff sniff and bite at the work that was done on his wing. You were shoving his head away each time but nodded to answer the question.
“I saved his life and in turn...he saved mine.” It was all that you told him, and Newt didn’t pry. He knows that look in your eyes because he’s had it himself. Oswald was taken by poachers, probably like some other hippogriffs that weren’t so lucky. Newt didn’t even want to imagine what he looked like before you saved him.
Perhaps you could tell him the full story some other time.
“Anyway, what’s been up with you?” Your tone changed from one of sad to one of joy, and the smile was back on your face. Newt has been waiting for a chance to catch up with you, and here it was. He told you all about his travels, America, and so forth. All the creatures he discovered, Pickett popping out to say hello at this point, making you giggle. In turn, you’ve told him how busy you’ve been exploring and studying creatures. He was eager to hear about the new creature you discovered. Tanukisunes (created by yours truly), name meaning something along the lines of “tricksters”, which resembled foxes with multiple tails while having beautiful navy blue fur. Apparently, they like to trick travelers and steal their belongings, guiding them off the path until they are utterly lost. But they aren’t cruel, guiding the lost traveler back to their path after they’ve had their fun-granted, with some items missing.
“Sounds like they’d get along well with my niffler.” Newt said and you laughed, nodding. The two of you then watched Oswald, who has now gotten on his feet, eyeing the both of you, but Newt in particular, this stranger who you seemed to trust.
You guys watched as the hippogriff took a couple steps forward. Ready to intervene, you stood up, Newt mimicking your actions. However, Oswald did something you weren’t expecting.
He bowed.
“It seems Oswald has taken a liking to you after all. Trusts you as much as I do.” You said softly to Newt, causing the wizard to smile to himself at your words. He seemed to shift on his weight as your hippogriff got to his feet. Newt was nervous about something he was going to ask.
“I-I’m happy to hear that about Oswald because...” He hesitated a bit, swallowing nervously.
“Yes?” You urged him gently. Oswald walked over and nudged his shoulder, encouraging the wizard slightly. Pickett poked his head out and began to chatter incoherently, trying to persuade Newt to speak up. He was grateful for the creatures, feeling comfort from their actions.
“Because it’s not safe out here, and...I think it would be best for me to keep an eye on Oswald...j-just until his wing heals so...maybe you could come with me? There’s room.” Newt offered before gesturing towards his case. He was expecting you to hesitate before saying you were too busy, but you just smiled.
“I was thinking the same thing.”
The smile that spread across his face was enough to make any woman’s heart soar. Pickett chattered in delight, causing you to give him an odd look with a smile. Newt covered up the bowtruckle and gently shoved him back in his pocket. Oswald nuzzled you and you pet his beak in response. 
“You’re very sweet, you know that?” You told him with a blush on your face.
“It’s because of you Y/N...always.” Newt told you, smiling softly. Oswald gave you guys looks before swishing his tail a bit, wanting to get on his merry way with you guys. So, Newt opened his case, and the hippogriff took a running leap into it, disappearing inside the larger space hidden within. Relief went in you to know he was safe now.
“After you.” He said politely.
“Such a gentleman.” You teased lightly before going into the case. However, before you disappeared entirely, you gave him a kiss on the cheek.
“Thank you so much.” You whispered lovingly, and then you went in, the case clicking shut behind you. 
Newt was glad you vanished because you missed the lovestruck smile that he couldn’t wipe off his face. And knowing that you might care for him back made him a bit giddy. However, he was mostly relieved to know that you and your hippogriff were safe and sound with him. It was creatures that introduced you guys to each other, and now it was creatures that brought you together again. In the end, maybe creatures will bring you guys together for good.
But for now, Newt knows he has to return to America, with you in tow this time.
He still has to pay Jacob for that muffin.
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kirimoochi · 1 year
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pearl jewelry.
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₊˚ ᗢ mermaid! kazuha x gn!reader.
⤷ when his attempts at a marriage proposal flies over your head.
⤷notes; based on this thread.
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Mermaid! Kazuha, who thinks that it’s been more than enough time to pop the question for you. 
He has consulted his other friends about the process. This was his first marriage proposal, and he certainly wasn’t going to want something similar to everyone else. Yoimiya suggests that he offer you a pearl necklace, so that you may never lose it. He pouts at the idea, saying that it was tradition for humans to give each other rings and that perhaps you would want a more normal proposal. The bubble quickly popped when Gorou clarifies the notion by saying: “If they wore a ring, what if they go off to fight? What if they lose it? It’s better to give them a necklace so it stays on longer!” 
And so he makes it his absolute mission to get you the best of the best. He searches the bottom of the sea for weeks while you were traveling Mondstadt. He even made sure that it was approved by Kokomi to have the roundest shape. He wasn’t going to give you just any pearl! It would be an insult to his culture if he were to give you something so half-baked. 
It’s been nearly a year since the two of you met. And your routine hasn’t changed much for the most part. You still come to the shores to see your favorite platinum-haired boy, and he would come back to you with the same smiling face you’ve grown to adore. Although you’ve long traveled the seas, visiting places like Liyue and Sumeru, you end up coming back to visit Watatsumi Island to see him. No matter how far you may be, or how dry the lands are, his memory remains fresh like salt water.
You’ve been teased on many occasions by Beidou. She comments that you’ve been staring off into the sea a lot more than usual, perhaps too much with that lovesick look in your eyes. You try to brush it off by saying you were merely friends, tied and bound together by your love for travel. Though she begs to differ. That expression was much like her own, and she too has been infatuated by the strange, mystical creature of the sea. At last, she leaves you alone when you wish to depart the Alcor. 
Stepping onto Watatsumi Island, you make your way to your favorite spot. Tucked in hand was another book that you bought from a bookstore in Mondstadt. It was about the history of grilled fish, and you thought Kazuha might like it. It was rather simple, but you figured that he might appreciate it a little more if it was something that reminded you of him. He was sort of one big fish after all. One that liked to jump into your arms more often than not, leading to the two of you being covered in sand.
To your surprise, Kazuha was sitting on a rock, already waiting for your arrival. He fiddled with something in his hands, his face looking quite nervous and shy. You smiled as you approached the man, sitting down next to him as you stared off into the horizon. You both share a conversation about your recent travels and how beautiful the nation of Mondstadt was, from their windmills to the sound of birds singing, it was nothing short of lovely. Though you would let slip that instead of listening to the drunken bard at Angel’s Share, you loved to listen to Kazuha’s singing.
At this comment, he blushed profusely. He shakes his head in denial but you know him too well to see that he was rather flattered. Finally gaining enough courage to show you what was hidden in his hand for the longest time. He opens a clam, revealing to you a neatly tied pearl on strings. It shined underneath the sun and you found yourself rather captivated. Smiling, you allowed him to wrap it around your neck, the pearl settling neatly on your collarbone. Pressing your fingers against it, you feel those same butterflies jitter in your stomach.
“This is the nicest gift you’ve given me so far,” You giggle, bringing your knees close to your chest, “What’s the occasion?” 
“It’s a lot more than that,” He whispers, leaning his head against your shoulder as he lets out a deep breath. 
He’s been planning this moment for months and everything seemed to go by so quickly. You accepted it so easily that it made him wonder if you even knew the implications behind this gift. While he has given you more pearls in the past, there was nothing more special than how perfect this specific one was. It takes a lot of dedication and time. You would only give something like this to someone you wish to marry, so for you to accept it so easily… 
He snaps his head up at you, looking at you with a confused expression. 
“Kazuha?” 
“Do you… know what this means?” 
You raise your eyebrow. Were you missing something? The gift was lovely, especially when he offered it to you in such a romantic way. It sort of makes your gift for him a lot more lame. You blink several times, unsure of what to say at the moment. So silence fills the air.
 It takes a few moments for everything to click in your head. This necklace must be extremely special. Was it something regarding mermaid culture? You were certainly unfamiliar with the ways of life for him, and the only time you’ve learned much was from Beidou. "That woman I was talking to you about," She started, looking out at the grand ocean, "She used to gift me a lot of pearl necklaces. I didn't understand the sentiment until she told me that it was her way of asking me to be hers," The captain grinned, "Do you think Kazuha would give you something like that?"
Was it a proposal? You stare back at him with a surprised look. He suddenly raises his hand, covering the lower half of his face with his webbed fingers. His cheeks are as bright as apples, and his ears were red. He was embarrassed that he had to spell it out for you in your human language.
“Do you think I’d give something like this to just anyone?” He murmurs, shyly peeking at your eyes. You tighten your hold on the book in your hands, your breath hitching at the sight.
“You wound me, Starling. This is… our equivalent of marriage. So please treat my heart kindly.”
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trying out a new format for writing small ideas that sort of feel like fics but aren't super long! i just had to write this one and post it because it's gonna be stuck in my mind if i dont!!
thanks to @maehemthemisfit for the idea ♡♡
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magnoliasandarson · 1 month
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World’s Best Big Brother
Richard Grayson had always wanted siblings. Back in the circus, his parents had laughed good-naturedly when he started suggesting names for a baby that would never come. He had a list of names a mile long that he went through during rehearsals, shouting them as he soared. He just knew he would be a good big brother- the best.
When his parents died, and he moved into the massive mausoleum that was Wayne Manor, his hope for a little brother or sister was relegated to his dreams. When he slept, another little bird followed him through the sky, a small hand reached for his. He just knew he would be a good big brother- the best.
Then, his little family shattered, and his dream died in a violent crash. He left home and went to Bludhaven because maybe he didn’t have anything left to keep him in Gotham. There was a wound bleeding into his new life; he felt it when he happened upon children on patrol. He brought them to safety, but his thoughts lingered with them. Were they safe? Were they loved? He could never stomach the idea of a child in danger, and he checked up on them as Detective Grayson. He would’ve been a good big brother- the best.
Jason showed up in a crude bastardization of Dick’s dearest dream. A boy with his same hair and eyes, wearing his family’s colors, flying just as he had. When he saw the new Robin in action, he nearly threw up. He was twelve. Dick hated that Bruce had tossed away his name and life to the next boy, but he loathed the fact that Jason was a child. He tried not to let it bother him around his newfound little brother, but bits of his resentment seeped through. He hated himself for it. 
Little by little, the bitterness faded away, and the fear for his brother’s safety became an afterthought. Jason was a good Robin, better than Dick had been, and seeing him fly was everything Dick had ever hoped. Dick was at every play, every rec-league basketball game, every bake sale- he was there. Jason bought him a mug on his birthday, “World’s Best Big Brother”, Dick never drank from it, just kept it displayed at the front of a shelf like a trophy. He was the best big brother, and he had the proof.
Then, Jason died. Suddenly, he wasn’t a big brother anymore. He didn’t even get to go to the funeral.
Where had he been? When his brother needed him, where had Nightwing been? When Jason was beaten to death by a villain Dick had thrown into Arkham more times than he could count- where had he been?
What had been so important that he hadn’t noticed his brother was going to run away? What could possibly have been so important that he ignored his little wing- the half to his soul he had waited his whole life for?
Dick was a flurry of tears and hurt when he got back to Bludhaven. Bruce had fractured his jaw; Dick was familiar enough with the pain to know damn well what that punch had done. There was mud from the grave staining his jeans as he swayed in front of a wall of photos. 
A gapped-tooth smile and sparkling blue eyes stared back at him from behind glass. Bile rose in Dick’s throat as he snatched the frame from the wall and hurled it at the mug on his bookshelf. The sound of ceramic shattering was covered by wounded screams as Dick ripped every smiling picture down and threw them across his apartment.
Jason had been wrong. 
Dick was the worst big brother ever.
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vagabond-umlaut · 1 year
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Sojourn In The Sun
Gojo Satoru x Fem!Reader; Arranged Marriage; Childhood Friendship To Complicated Feelings™️; Fluff; Angst; Canon-Compliant; Contains Manga Spoiler; Satoru & Reader Are So Cute, So Honest And So Kind-Of-Happy With Each Other Here– I Love Them!; Silly Jokes Are Their [& My] Coping Mechanism; Takes Place Between JJK 221 & 236.
Oneshot From Series: One Day, Three Autumns
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"You. Baked. This. For. Me."
"No, Satoru. A stork flew in through ths kitchen window and dropped this bloody cake on that table."
"But don't they deliver babies or something? Plus, isn't that window a tad too tiny for such a big bird?"
"I guess, the stork must've dropped you on your head while delivering you to your parents, you know?"
A beat passes in response to your remark, before Satoru erupts into a fit of chortles and you shake your head with a huffed chuckle. Getting up from where you were hunched over the countertop, nibbling on an omelette and scrolling through your mobile, Satoru watches your face gleam in fondness in the late morning light, as you amble over to him.
Very messy hair. Ratty old clothes. Sleepy yet shiny eyes— His cheeks hurt from the sheer joy bubbling in his chest at this sight before him.
"Seriously, sweetness? Storks?" he asks, lifting his arm then dropping it to wrap round your shoulders as you reach him and snuggle into his side – only to catch hold of the hem of his huge sweater, and squeeze yourself into it, your tiny fingers clasping round his back as your head emerges at the top and you move to nuzzle into his neck, teeth biting cute little nips on the skin there.
If it was even two months back, Satoru reckons he would have been a hell lot stunned, seeing you give your affections so blatantly– that too at a place outside your shared bed, outside the darkness of the night.
But... It no longer is two months back. It is now. Not only in day, date, time. But also in the irreversibly mutated fashion the earth rotates on its axis everyday in the man's eyes. New experiences. New allies. New absences. New nightmares...— Everything's different from how it was before that chilly October night— Your husband deems it to be not an awful lot strange to see you too like this. The world is not the same as before; to survive, you too must change to adapt to the change, must you not?
Lips brushing your forehead once before dashing away, he asks in a soft yet humorous tone, "Too tired to give a reply, are we now, huh?"
"Not really," you hum, your words punctuated by a yawn you're quick to suppress; you resume, "I know only two birds which are said to be used in sending parcels and stuff. One, messenger pigeon– but they are too small to carry a cake like that. Two, stork– stories do say they were used to deliver babies – so I thought delivering a cake would be a piece of cake for them, heh!" You shoot him a grin, eyes crinkling at the corners into lovely half-moons, "Pretty funny and punny, ain't I?"
"Of course, sweetness. You are all three," Satoru is quick to agree with a nod— happy wife = happy life; plus, it's not like he's lying to you— A shadow of confusion falls on your face— Deciding to deal with it later, for the sake of the question weighing on his mind at the moment, the man repeats his ask from earlier, "You really really baked this for me?"
You return a nod, hints of a smile lurking in the shape of your lips.
"But why?"
Whatever happiness might've beginning to bloom on your features, it withers away– Your husband smacks himself internally for employing such a tone: So weak, so much so that it makes you peer up at him in concern he has only ever seen on you after a particularly bad mission.
So weak, so that it makes him hope you don't think him to be any less than 'The Strongest'— any less than being capable of standing beside you, protecting you, being worthy of you.
A pair of chapped lips plant themselves on his cheek. "Just because I wanted to bake a cake for you, 'Toru!" you explain with a giggle, albeit its subdued quality doesn't go past his eye, as you move a bit away to press a swift kiss on his other cheek; fingers drawing lazy patterns on his scalp and massaging the roots of his hair.
"You've always done too much for me and everyone else– Thought of returning the favour once, although I doubt it can ever match yours... Also, haven't you always wanted to eat a cake baked by yours truly?"
He has.
He so, so has.
Ever since the day you baked some muffins for him in the microwave oven of the school kitchen– him, a grumbling mess thanks to his all-too-familiar migraine and those old geezers– you, another grumbling mess thanks to your all-too-familiar insomnia and those annoying AF exams—
Satoru never imagined he could taste a sweet dish made by you ever again in his life, for the past ten years or so— given how the morning after that night you declared you would never bake again: "uff, that is too fuckin' tiring and boring!" and how every next time he came with a migraine to your door, you pointedly ignored his whining for you to bake him something, choosing to grab the warm and cold compress instead and give him a massage, following the manuals kept in stack-over-stack on your table—
Even during his teenage years, then later as an adult, the sorcerer has always missed your baking, but seeing you care for him in ways much too characteristically 'you'... he decided to pay no mind to such dumb wishes, he knows you'll never fulfill in this lifetime.
Except now you've fulfilled them and your husband doesn't know any response fitting enough to thank your efforts and thoughts through.
Throwing the cake a sideways glance, he brings his focus back to you gazing at him, to the eagerness reflecting in your irises. His lips tilt up into a smile, obeying a mind of their own.
"Blue velvet cake with white frosting... you sure do know how to make me happy, don't you, sweetness?" he muses out loud, carefully noting the warmth creeping up your neck into your cheeks and ears, "But, so much for a thanks... there must be another reason behind this, right?"
Feeling the tiny burst of air hitting him from your quiet exhale, Satoru lets you maneuver him towards the kitchen until he's leaning with his back against the marble island and you're nestling even closer to him.
A palm glides cautiously over the planes of his back.
Almost as if the man in front of you is a glass figurine–
Almost as if you're fine with him being a glass figurine.
So easy to read.
So easy to hurt.
So easy to care for with the gentlest of touches and softest of smiles, the look in your eyes tells every one of his six eyes– the innumerable chips and cracks in his very essence be damned—
You poke his cheek, a knowing twitch in your lips.
"You rarely ever cuddled me in bed before, yet now, every single night and day, I find you squeezing me with those arms and legs of yours..." Satoru's eyes widen. Your lips part in a fondly teasing grin. "Think why – really why– you hug me for warmth and don't hog the blankets; and you'll have your answer, 'Toru."
Birds shriek outside. Your mobile beeps thrice. Your omelette goes as frozen as poor Uranus on the countertop beside.
For the second time this cold day, the two of you break into laughter.
"And you'll have your answer, 'Toru!?!?" Satoru mimics you except in a soprano-esque shrill voice. "Who the fuck do you think we are, huh? A pair of lovers in some Shakespeare-y play, baring our feelings to each other in the soft glow of the winter sun, or some stupid shit like that?"
Another chuckle breaks free from your chest at his words; the grin on his face widening, he watches you take a long breath then say, "Nope nope nope! The both of us are way too uncivilised to play any role like in Shakespeare's plays — but Satoru~" you drawl your vowels out; his heart beats a little faster in his chest– "I can never be as unrefined as you, going as far as to keep your wife waiting, while you ask question after question– and not eat the cake and praise it, like a good spouse should, you know?"
"Oh, is it so?" The man inquires, brow raised, before warping with you in his arms to where the cake's kept, and cutting a big chunk with the knife kept, gobbles it all up in one go.
The tilt of your lips betrays the disapproving click your tongue makes.
A very content hum escapes Satoru. "Your baking's something out of this world–no, galaxy, sweetness. I hope you know–"
He stills, focus stolen by the letters and number a bit far on the table–
Satoru's gaze snaps back to you, only to find the same smile on your face– so simple, so devious– complicated and thwarted by the small expressive tremor of your lips; your gaze moving away from him to a calendar on your left and his right, the very same which stopped him—
Grasping your chin in his frosting-covered fingers, he drags your gaze back to himself, tutting, "You aren't any better than me, wifey. You too lack the same manners and etiquettes I do— So, now— c'mon, c'mon, c'mon–" he says, not unlike a broken record, playing the same section of music until he makes you cave in from the annoyance alone, "Wish your darling husband 'Happy Birthday 'Toru!!', give him a big birthday smooch, and be the courteous wife, you aren't really, but think you're— Now, go ahead, go ahead, go–"
"No."
"No?" Satoru echoes, holding back a weary chuckle. Or sigh. The man doesn't know which. You nod with that same stubborn determination of yours, he has happened to love-hate-tolerate over the years. "Yeah. No. I don't wanna. Wishing you can only solidify the fact that today is December 7th–"
"I think, the clock striking twelve few hours back solidified it–"
"Which will go on to cement the fact we're only 17 days away–"
"I don't think the fact needs any cementing. It's cast in stone–"
"Is there no way we can be happy, Satoru?"
Your question startles him into a momentary stun – not 'cause of the solemnity packed into every word of it – but because it serves as the mirror image to the question them cursed voices in his brain ask him in the warmth of the day, in the chill of the night, when he finds Yuuji sitting by himself with no spiky black hair nor bright orange hair next to him; when he catches the ashtray on Shoko's table filled with way too many cigarette stubs; when he wakes up to see you sitting in the dimly lit storeroom, a faded photograph or a childish drawing in your hand; when he looks at the mirror and finds the reason behind every pain his cherished ones have suffered, staring right back at him—
"There is," Satoru says, willing his mind to shut up for once, to let him say what he wants to say for once– the clock is ticking a bit too fast–
"Don't think of today as anything more than that it's December 7. Not how many days it's been since Halloween. Not how many days it'll be before it's Christmas Eve. Just focus on the fact it's my birthday, and everything will seem a hell lot better, even if it's only for a short time."
You peer at him attentively, before narrowing your eyes a bit. "Never took you as the kind to ignore reality, y'know?"
Your husband cracks an amused grin. "Still, standing in the middle of a warzone and actively ignoring it is cooler than running away from it, isn't it?"
"Cooler and dumber," you correct with a teasing grin and a waggle of your finger– however, before he can gather any retort to your remark, he finds himself being pulled down by his collar, his lips colliding with your waiting ones— the ensuing kiss a little sweet, a little spicy, a little shy, a little hungry; but overall, very, very addicting. Satoru thinks you can never give him kisses enough to satiate him, even for a tiny while.
He is always going to stay this ravenous, this yearning for you. In this lifetime and every other that follows. He can't ever get enough of you.
A tiny pop! reverberates in the bubble round you two, as your mouth gently separates from his, though never strays anywhere far, resting only few millimetres away. Eyes drifting to his swollen lips for a beat, Satoru watches you look at him again, cheeks heated and stretched in a smile.
"Happy birthday, Satoru," you whisper, "Many, many happy returns of the day."
"Thanks," the man mumbles, running a careful thumb back-and-forth over your bottom lip– before something clicks to life in his mind. Your husband registers a slow smirk form on his face. "But I guess it'll be a happier birthday if ya promise to bake me a cake every now and then. What do you think, sweetness?"
"Nah!" your reply arrives, as if it's a reflex response and not one which requires some thinking, "Baking's too fuckin' tiring and boring– But..." you trail off for a beat, the nonchalance on your face morphing into a tenderness– You resume, "Why don't you try and find out by yourself if I will ever decide to bake a cake for you, every now and then, yeah?"
The weight of your words lingers in the gap in between for a second.
Accepting the weight with an eager grin, Satoru closes the gap, him inclining forwards to rest his forehead on yours.
"Sounds like a challenge, sweetness. Good thing, I'm more than ready to try my best to meet it."
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