#because it cannot only be me who experiences it

[beatlblog]

i hope john bullied him (via @themagicalmysticalboy)

“Oi Paulie... wha’s on yer fookin face then?”#I hope John made fun of him#god#wtf (via @starseeker95)

#HELP#paul god what was that phase (via @mrlennonmccartney)

#if john still wanted him while paul looked like that it was true love#john's taste was so varied and dubious that i don't put it past him at all#but what a downgrade bc john looked great (via @stewy)

#hot take: this is the reason john decided not to work with paul after all#'if your music sounds anything like how your mustache looks i want no part of it' (via @paulnnccartney)

Knowing john he was like never mind my love you look so cute😍🙈😂 (via @mclennongirl15)

#i cannot imagine what was going through johns head when he saw him looking like that (via @harrisonism)

#imagine this outfit being the reason the beatles never got back together#john was like i'm gonna need about 6 years to forgive you for this 😂 (via @whoscruffylooking)

It’s okay because that look is 💯 on my wife.#I love that horrible facial hair#that first time drag king look (via @winston-legthigh)

#I feel like this is how John expected fashion disaster Paul to shown up#imagine just looking hot and hanging out by a pool#that’s them! (via @asphalt-cocktail)

#I respect it tho (via @lennons)

#john was just like ‘finally the inverse of all those years where I was pining and you looked amazing’#it’s just such a bad look#what WAS he thinking#definitely not what he needed to be which was ‘I look a complete twat’ (via @drivenalphabitchpaulmccartney)

2022

#the cunt paul is serving is like#fancy health food store cunt#but it's been expired for 3 years#it smells like fridge and patchouli and b vitamins and weed#john however is immaculate#god literally invented high waisted flares just for him#john and paul#my boygirlfriend john lennon#i would literally commit atrocities to know what john thought of how he looked here (via @wereonourwayhome)

#this actually changes everything i thought i understood about the 70s J&P vibe#also new questions arise about Paul's chest hair and the lack of it prior#only the important things#new podcast episodes#Paul's worst look and chest grooming#paul mccartney#john and paul#OH NEW HOT TAKE#this was 100% done intentionally to make sure they didn't bang#it was such a danger Paul took one for the team#and by took onei mean he prevented any taking from being done#dammit I'll probably write that fic#5 times John and Paul didn't bang (via @mydaroga)

#this is why he didn’t go to new orleans#:/ (via @goldslick)

SAD!

John Lennon, upon seeing Paul again in 1974 looking like that:

#john lennon#the beatles#shitposts#im sorry I thought of it then had to get it out (via @queerlennon)

#absolutely cursed#paul ruined his chances by choosing this moment to try a new form or drag that did NOT work for him (via @ahumoroussuggestion)

#absolutely dying#literally too much#the ultimate moment of seeing an ex who broke your heart after a few years and being like……oh#THAT’S who all the fuss was about???#(except from May’s account of that time it seems like the chemistry was still popping off somehow???)#which like talk about true love#being able to get past THAT#I kind of think that Paul was finding it fun to make himself look as gross as possible#relishing in it#after so many years of his looks being held up and scrutinized#to just be like oh yeah? watch this#kind of typical paulish rebellion (via @hands-across-the-skysky)

#divorce babe (via @pennielane)

#watching this post go through its villain arc has been such an experience great work guys#and by great work i mean im deleting tumblr (via @mystical-one)

He really has some balls, turning up like that.#mullet moustache and horrible thing on his chin#his fashion sense seemed to leave at the same time as Jane did#was he her Ken doll (via @beatlepaul4ever)

#honestly he still looks kinda hot#that wouldnt cure me (via @zutalorsihavemissedone)

Actually, it could maybe have been worse - he could have turned up with this look.

I can’t decide if it’s a real moustache or that horse face planted him in some muck. (via @beatlepaul4ever)

Why does he look like Paul Prenter? (via @bewareofdarkness)

#HBFJRBFHIRBFEKLFR#i think i would have just left#maybe that's why john thought he needed to be taken down a peg#'all you do is write love songs' like it was gonna hurt him#make him rethink his look#last time john hurt paul -- the man grew a beard (via @writertyper)

People ask why he didn’t go to San Francisco with him and the answer is this (via @yellowroombarine)

#this will forever make me mad at him#like this was the last photo documentation of them together#and that’s what he looked like#why (via bridgeoverstrawberryfields)

#REAL#FELT#some tiger king bullshit💀#I’m kinda with it tho💀💀 (via @iamsigningmylifeaway)

2024

#fr WHO lied to paul and told him this is a good idea (via @comradeharrison)

#as someone who thinks that 70s paul is the most ethereal indescribably beautiful person in the world#he looked soooo like shit during their reunion im ctfu#the dash of beard. horrifying (via @bugpoasting)

#if you genuinely think that John wasn’t absolutely attracted to Paul’s hillbilly porn star look than idk what we’re doing here#that sun tan and rat stache 100% did it for him (via @lennonsfag)

#I understand where everyone’s coming from but you’re LYING to yourself if you think John wouldn’t be into that#It’s Paul fucking McCartney he could show up bald with a beard down to his shoulders and John would get all hot and bothered over it#Paul has nothing to worry abt so why not pull up to the function looking like a porn star with the white Karen capri pants and all (via @iwannabeyourman)

#I’m sorry but he literally looks insane#mostly thag hair sticking straight up (via @sleeper9)

#I still think that's such a power move on Paul's part to be honest#Is he sliding his index finger into the fold his wraparound vest there?#“I know you want me. Even like this”#Paul's arm hair#Paul's...chest hair?#paul mccartney#Meanwhile John's showing off his hips bulge & thighs in May's jeans#they deserved each other (via @crepesuzette2023)

#i imagine he immediately got cured of homosexuality#if not... john please. put your glasses on (via @estrangedfiances)

#nooo he was so into it#his prissy princess suddenly looks like he’s into complete filth#john’s wildest fantasies suddenly seem possible (via @goldslick)

#and john was cured of his life long crush as soon as he opened the door#i actually hate that the bottom one is the last known picture of them together (via @the-electric-monk)

#ok i think this moon is hot i’m SORRY#like he looks so slutty he knew exsctly what he was doing#open shirt? gay little mustache? shoulder length shag?#the chest hair?????#paul was trying to ensnare him fr (via @gayyytripper)

#scream#once again mccartney was ahead of his time (via @oldmanpusspuss)

#when your ex shows up looking like a cartoon evil man (via @bambi-kinos)

#this is Kurtis Conner lmaooo goodbye (via @maelwife)

#I mean you know… I’ve grown partial to his pornstache and yes even the mullet#so idk probably I would still dig it (via @tenitchyfingers)

#tbh it’s not a bad look but it’s ugly when he does it (via @strangebrew)

only accurate take

#normally i run screaming seeing 70s paul#but this look?#*chefs kiss#what a power move (via @consulting--defective)

#john y paul#jp en los 70s#pues si (via @akamy08wt)

#did he dress like that on purpose with the goal of attracting or scaring him? we will never know#im soft for paul 70s mullet not so much for the moustche (on any period) but the clothess#mclennon#you cant have 67 without 74 last meeting (via @alienoriana)

#I've always kinda liked the mullet (yes yes something's wrong with me)#but I just can't get behind the mustache on him. I'm sorry#I kinda unironically want that shirt too#at least it has colour unlike most of the stuff people try selling you these days (via @chut-je-dors)

#i can tell u now i am infact a bisexual who is infact attracted to this look#hes committed to the bit (via @mcstarr)

#I don’t think I can get over that little bit on the chin#and the mustache too but yeah that’s where I just I don’t think I can but… put me and him in the same room and I might feel differently#cause of his energy#his physical presence (via @johnisonlysleeping)

#predicted bisexual twink fashion (via @therealestwizard)

#I think the Only downfall is the Kind of mullet here that type of mullet is out#it has to be just a little shaggier#but otherwise yeah this is just some dude at a club now (via @menlove)

#KURTIS LMAAOO#its actually kind of horrendous but i couldnt do any better (via @xtreme-cringe)

#and anyway we all know john would be totally into it dont kid yourselves (via @oldmanpusspuss)

#I could never transition because this is what I would slowly animorph into (via @asurrogateblog)

#it is still not a look and ladies pls know i will never eve date a man with this moustache and that shirt#but op. you aint wrong (via @phonybeatlemania)

#it’s called ✨️fashion✨️#what was 70s fashion even#“fashion” according to mccartney (via @lilywolfgray)

Can you imagine being John Lennon in 1974, and you’re about to see your ex-best friend/pseudo husband/songwriting partner for the first time in years, plus its a really big moment cause you’re tentatively thinking about working with him again, then the motherfucker shows up looking like this unironically:

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

I agree about Yuu developing magic being a weird choice but what do you think about Yuu temporarily gaining magic? It could happen with Ace's unique magic. I think it swaps his magic and whoever he casts it on. Could he theoretically give a magicless person like Yuu his own magic like a baton pass in pokemon passing on stat changes as it swaps out for a new pokemon?

[Referencing this post!]

I believe Yuu is already capable of using some magic via tools, but not all. For example, Yuu cannot fly on their own, as that would require using magic to make the broom float. A magical pen or magestone is also pointless for Yuu since they require magic input to even be of use. However, Yuu is able to use the hammer magitool, the magical projector, and magical gramophone to spruce up their Guest Room. They can also use the ghost camera, which is described as an enchanted artifact in the prologue.

Like I said in this post, we don’t know a lot about Ace’s UM now so it’s hard to say what is and isn’t possible yet.

I know that the “Ace can give Yuu his magic” theory is pretty popular right now. Prior to the book 7 chapter 12 part 3 update, there were already fans speculating that Ace would grant Yuu his own magic somehow due to a voice line he has when he reaches his max level: “Wow, I feel seriously good. Now even helping out a certain magicless someone will be a cinch.” If this becomes a reality, it would be a feasible way to give Yuu their moment to contribute to a fight while maintaining their self-insert appeal.

Personally though 😅 I’m of the opinion that this won’t be possible. The way Ace’s magic is described, it appears like he swapped his magic with his target. Would he even be able to swap with… nothing? It sounds like a bad deal to me. Like, even if it was possible, why would you want to loan your magic to someone else (someone who, mind you, has ZERO experience spellcasting and no formal training) and leave yourself defenseless? It assumes that Yuu would be a magical prodigy, instantly able to know what to do with Ace’s magic arsenal (which is average to begin with). That’s crazy to me because even skilled mages studied and practiced for years to get to their current level. The only character I can recall that was Instantly Good at magic was Malleus, who says he felt demeaned by tutors that gave him comparatively simple lessons in magic. Are we putting Yuu, the magic novice, in the same gifted category as Malleus? How do we know Yuu’s attempts at spellcasting wouldn’t spiral out of control and accidentally harm themselves or their allies? (This happened with Rollo’s younger brother; do we want a potential repeat of that incident?) It just doesn’t make sense to me. In what scenario would this be advantageous or preferable to Ace spellcasting on his own?

… Granted, book 7 has been doing many nonsensical things for the sake of fanservice within the wonky dream spaces so I won’t say the possibility of Yuu using Ace’s magic is a definite 0%. Maybe it’s possible to wish up that they can use magic expertly within the dream space but not irl (since the OB boys could magically OB in the dream space without issue)💀

[m0ssxz0mbie]

I've had the realisation that Jayvik and Merthur are Literally The Same Ship. Just in different fonts.

THE PARALLELS!! THE SIMILARITIES!! I KNEW when i was reading Jayvik fanfics that something was familiar. i'm like a crazy conspiracy theorist.

Minor disclaimer, tho Merlin is one of my favourite shows, I have not watched it in a while. I also binged Arcane a month ago, but those who know me irl (if ur reading this, hello bbygurl), know that the way I watch shows and movies is cursed. SO-- if things do not seem to be the most accurate to canon, fanfic is MY canon. also,, SPOILERS AHEAD FOR MERLIN BBC AND ARCANE.

_____________________

ARTHUR // JAYCE

- Both come from the upper class of the society within said media. Arthur is the literal prince (later king), and Jayce is sponsored by a well-standing family (and later becomes the founder of Hextech + a councillor)

- Wants to improve the lives of all people regardless of status, class, or ability. Arthur, tho wary of magic, wanted to protect druids, which he acknowledged were peaceful and not corrupt. Everyone portrays him to also care for peasants and people with lesser status when he is king. You really see this in canon with Merlin, Gwen, Knights of The Round Table, etc. Jayce wants to use Hextech to improve the lives of those in Piltover and Zaun via the use of magic.

- Experiences expectations of others within society which make them do bad things. When Arthur is the prince, you see many instances where he wants to do the reasonable, morally correct thing (for the situation in this POV), and he cannot because of Uther's demands and expectations for him. Jayce has expectations placed upon him by the council to use Hextech for their own gain rather than what he and Viktor wanted to use it for.

- HIMBO. What more needs to be said? NONE. BUT I DON'T CARE, I'll say it anyway. Arthur is literally a himbo knight who swings big sword. Jayce is a himbo engineer who swings big hammer. Both rush into danger and never listen when their sassy twink says something has bad vibes (literally any cursed magical place for Merlin, and the Hexcore for Viktor).

- Both are absolutely OBSESSED, WHIPPED and SMITTEN for their twink. Again, this doesn't need explaining, but I will. Arthur, which is established well into the first episodes of Merlin, has scared off every manservant before Merlin. All the servants were probably good at their job. Yet mans keeps Merlin for 10 YEARS. Merlin calls him thick all the time (both in the physical and mental sense) and sasses him ALL the time. Merlin gets away with so much, not only from Arthur but Uther too??? Uther for sure knows Arthur is ATTACHED. In the first year of knowing Merlin, Arthur literally tries to sacrifice his life for Merlin (Merlin does the same). Jayce did originally wanna help improve the lives of people with magic, but I don't think he even thought about the people of Zaun until Viktor mentioned it. Mans instantly agreed and INSTANTLY called it "their Hextech dream" VIKTORS has BEEN HERE FOR FIVE MINUTES. Jayce moves FAST.

- Both date an independent woman while desperately longing for their twink. We love Gwen here, she is the best. Best Queen, the best person, just The Best. Mel is a complicated character, who is badass in the ending, no denying that, just very stinky she manipulated Jayce for her own gain. Both were badass women who I think needed more screen time cause, at times, they were very much pushed to the side. Both Arthur and Jayce are such pathetic simps, longing for their men, and tbh, both Gwen and Mel knew, there was no hiding it. Especially cause in Merlin BBC, most characters have a crush on Merlin at some point in their life while knowing him.

_____________________

MERLIN // VIKTOR

- Both come from the lower class of society, which faces the brutality of those in power. Merlin is a peasant, and does get mistreated because of it, usually from other knights or nobles coming from out of Camelot. HOWEVER, mans main worry is the fact he has magic, literally is magic itself, and lives in a place where it is ILLEGAL. But he also experiences brutality by being Arthur's servant, and someone doing the Knights job better and stopping anyone from killing Arthur. Viktor comes from Zaun, which is the lower class of the society in Arcane, most of its problems are directly caused by the fact they are oppressed. Viktor not only receives discrimination because he is from Zaun but also because he is disabled.

- Both have an older mentor who provides them a home and sanctuary. Merlin has Gaius, his Uncle, the court physician, who lets him become an apprentice, teaches him more magic, and provides a home when he becomes more unsafe. Thinking about it, being in a kingdom where they kill you for having magic is probably better than being enslaved to be in an army and to use your magic as a weapon. Viktor has Heimerdinger, who is his mentor, to which Viktor is his assistant. Viktor gets provided accommodations in Piltover, presumably at the academy they are at, and is able to use his talents, especially when Jayce enters the picture.

- Both are sassy as FUCK. Merlin is the sassiest with Arthur, always teasing him, calling him a cabbagehead or a clotpole, the banter is STRONG with Merthur (i LOVE banter). Viktor is also super sassy as well, especially to those who don't appreciate him, or his and Jayce's work.

- They both would do ANYTHING for the future they have envisioned (with their bfs). Merlin would literally do anything to keep Arthur alive, even listening to THAT BASTARD KILGHARRAH, FUCK THAT DRAGON. Mans contemplated killing a child, you could even say he has betrayed his own kind in many ways. Merlin loses himself to make sure Arthur is safe, he is SO ready to die for him, to be nothing more than a servant forever, just so he could be by his side. Viktor removes free will from people so that he can create the most peaceful world, mans really just wanted a world where he could have Jayce, as it was the conflict between Piltover and Zaun that made they split apart.

- They both are Gods. This kinda ties into the last point. But Merlin IS MAGIC. He is the physical embodiment of magic. His druid name means immortal. The druids treat him as a leader, a god. Viktor becomes Jesus and performs miracles for people to better their lives, he becomes the physical host for the Hexcore.

_____________________

BOTH

- Both ships are doomed yaoi. again, what more do I need to say? Merlin has waited 1,500 years for his man to come back to him, and Jayvik is,, in the astral plane??? dead??? Hence why fanfics exists, both ships need their happy ending, fix-it fanfics.

_____________________

The parallels not only between the characters themselves and how certain people portray their character in fanfics are insane. Especially the way Arthur and Jayce simp for Merlin and Viktor.

NOW, after reading all that, you may have noticed the colour of the names, and yes, BOTH JAYVIK AND MERTHUR ARE A RED/BLUE SHIP. Which solidifies my points even more.

(I have seen Jayvik x Be More Chill fanart, I've seen Jayvik x Star Trek fanart,, has anyone considered jayvik x merlin bbc fanart???? 👀👀👀👀)

[shizuturnspages]

Hello, You can make a yandere Wanderer/Scaramouche , Zhongli, arlecchino, neuvillette? ,Albedo? (creator?), Venti, Mavuika and Ei meet a reader who is almost identical to the person who died long ago (such as Venti's best friend, Ei's sister and the Salt Goddess etc) . The reader is identical, but not exactly identical, like the color of the hair and eyes. Thank you, your reading is great!

Echoes of the Past

Synopsis: You are not them. But it does not matter. Because now, you are theirs. Pairings: [Separate] Yandere Wanderer, Zhongli, Arlecchino, Neuvillette, Albedo, Venti, Mavuika, & Ei x Reader who Resembles Their Lost One

Wanderer / Scaramouche – The Puppet’s Haunting Past

At first, he thinks it’s a cruel joke.

A twisted trick played by fate to torment him further.

When he sees you in the marketplace, his heart stops.

He sees the familiar tilt of your head, the same way Niwa used to look at the world—with curiosity, with kindness. But that’s impossible.

Niwa is gone.

Wanderer is frozen in place, hands clenched at his sides, watching as you move through the crowd, unaware of his piercing gaze.

And then—

"Tch." His voice is sharp, bitter, filled with something he refuses to name. "This is ridiculous."

But he follows you.

He does not know why.

Only that he must.

And when you finally turn, eyes locking with his, he feels something inside him snap.

You are not Niwa.

But that does not matter.

Because now, you belong to him.

Zhongli – The Remnants of a Shattered Past

He drops his teacup.

Porcelain shatters against the ground, but he does not move to pick it up.

He is staring.

For the first time in centuries, Zhongli feels as if he has forgotten how to breathe.

Guizhong.

He can see her in you—not entirely, but enough. The way your lips curve into a soft, thoughtful smile, the way you tilt your head in curiosity. It is too much.

Rationality tells him that you are not her. That you could not possibly be her.

But reason means nothing when confronted with a past that refuses to stay buried.

He approaches you, voice smooth but laced with something almost desperate.

"Forgive me," he murmurs, watching your every movement. "But you remind me of someone very dear to me."

He does not say that he intends to keep you.

But he will.

And he will never let you leave.

Arlecchino – The Flame That Refuses to Die

She hates this.

You remind her of him.

The one who raised her, the one who shaped her into who she is—the Father she buried with her own hands.

And yet, here you stand.

Smiling that same infuriating smile.

She wants to ignore you. To pretend you do not exist.

But her eyes always find you in the crowd.

Her mind refuses to let go.

And before she knows it, she has you cornered.

Her gloved fingers trail along your cheek, deceptively gentle.

"You have no idea what you’ve done," she murmurs, eyes dark.

Because now—

She cannot let you go.

Neuvillette – The Mourning Judge

It is raining.

It has been raining since the moment he saw you.

Neuvillette does not understand why the sight of you unsettles him so deeply.

Until he realizes—

Egeria.

The one he lost. The one who guided Fontaine, whose absence left a wound that never fully healed.

And now, you.

You are not her. And yet, something in the way you move, in the way you speak—it is too close.

Too painful.

He does not approach you immediately. He simply watches, silent, distant, his expression unreadable.

But the rain continues.

And when he finally does speak, his voice is impossibly soft—

"You should not be alone."

You shifted uncomfortably. “Do I… know you?”

His pale eyes darkened.

"No," he murmured. "But I knew you."

Your brows furrowed in confusion, but Neuvillette did not elaborate.

Instead, he simply watched you.

Silent.

Possessive.

Rain poured harder, soaking his coat—soaking you.

He did not care.

For the first time in centuries…

He had something worth keeping.

Albedo – The Creator’s Repeating Experiment

At first, he does not react.

He simply observes.

You are not Rhinedottir. Your eyes are different, your voice is not the same.

And yet.

There is something in your expression—some unspoken familiarity—that grips him in a way he cannot explain.

Albedo does not believe in fate.

But this?

This is close.

"You are intriguing," he says at last, tilting his head. "I wonder…"

He steps closer.

"Would you allow me to study you?"

There is no real question in his voice.

Because now that he has found you—

He will never let you go.

Venti – The Wind That Carries Memories

Venti forgets how to breathe.

He stops playing his lyre mid-song, fingers frozen over the strings.

You are standing there, bathed in Mondstadt’s golden light, and for a moment—just a moment—he thinks he sees him.

His best friend.

The boy who once dreamed of freedom.

Venti’s chest aches.

And then, you smile.

And his vision blurs.

He appears before you in an instant, his usual playful demeanour gone.

"Hey," he breathes, voice trembling slightly. "Do you… believe in destiny?"

His fingers curl around your wrist.

Because if this is fate—

He won’t let it slip away again.

Mavuika — The Ghost of the Fallen God

She stares.

For a long time, she does nothing but stare.

You look just like Xbalanque.

The deity she lost, the one who was taken from her—the one whose absence left her hollow.

Mavuika does not speak at first. She simply stands in your path, silent and still, her piercing eyes locked onto you.

Then, softly—

"I have waited a long time."

Her voice is almost gentle.

But there is something dangerous beneath it.

"You will not leave me again."

And she means it.

Ei – The Raiden Shogun’s Eternal Mourning

It was a cruel trick.

Fate had already taken too much from her.

Makoto. Her people. The ones she had loved.

And now—

Now, it dared to put you before her, looking so much like her sister yet not.

Ei’s grip on her sword tightened.

You turned to face her, eyes questioning. “Do you need something?”

Her breath caught.

For a moment, she saw Makoto.

For a moment, she thought she could reach her.

And then, the realization sank in.

Her blade lowered.

"You will stay in Inazuma," she said softly—too softly.

You blinked. “I never said—”

"It was not a request."

This time, she would not be left behind.

[persicipen]

i could write essays at this point. i do not want valid criticism to just sink in between mindless hate or words from people who repeat someone’s opinions without forming their own. i love this game. i love it enough to play every single day and still enjoy many aspects of it while simply growing more and more disappointed. experimenting with style usually happens at the beginning. not at the end of the story. yes, we are in the fifth out of six nations and around two years from finishing the main plot.

the game already has an established fanbase. we all started playing because of how it used to look and feel. why do they now feel like changing the iconic and recognisable core design traits just to fit in with their other titles? why even make different games if eventually all of them start to look the same? and it’s not about the new character anymore. it just put me over the boiling point. she’s another one in a row with obvious tricks catering to specific target audiences. and it’s not about natlan only either. this region is just filled with issues that were already there in previous nations — issues that were already annoying and worrying me if they ever improve. and they didn’t. well, one thing improved and the other got ignored, rinse and repeat, a vicious cycle. i just don’t understand how a game that has been constantly a number one popular title since 2020 still cannot act as a trendsetter and do its own thing without worrying about the revenue because it will always be on top instead of falling for the same cheap gimmicks that maybe boost niche titles but feel extremely bland if put against what’s already been established. pain, agony, suffering even, if you ask me…

[bonehead-cat]

*disclaimer, i don’t argue online so this will probably be the only time i do this.

If the label isn't helpful to you you don't have to use it, even if your experience would fit within the definition.

since you say that one doesn’t have to use “agender” to describe themselves because they don’t personally find it helpful, would you also say that one doesn’t have to use “cisgender” to describe themselves for the same reason? additionally, do you think it’s valid for one to be uncomfortable with being referred to with a label that ascribes to a belief that that person doesn’t believe in?

Honestly, every word used to talk about this "internal gender" I mentioned is just labels. In a world where we've successfully abolished sociatal gender, there may not be any labels at all for these experiences. Certainly not the current labels of "man", "woman", "non binary", "genderfluid" and all the million and one other words that exist out there.

the conclusion that “well technically everything is an ascribed label so none of it really matters” tends to be destructive to any arguments had. we wouldn’t be able to have a discussion about anything, let alone be able to communicate with any language if we shut down every conversation with “well it’s all just labels so it doesn’t matter.” labels certainly do matter if you want to argue definitions for words like “agender.”

in a post-gender abolition society, the concepts of “man” and “woman” would still exist because they refer to the material reality of, in the case of a man, being an adult human male, and in the case of a woman, being an adult human female. if suddenly every english-speaker decided to refer to women as “wompyn,” then texan wompyn still wouldn’t have abortion rights, because the law is based on their material being, not the sole label of “woman.”

You don't have to believe an "internal sense of gender" exists to respect that other people do. And that many people who believe in it's existence can separate it from the sociatal form of gender that is objectively harmful. Same way as you can criticise organised religion as an atheist while respecting individual's rights to their own spiritual beliefs.

i completely agree! and i would hope that you’d also agree that unfalsifiable, faith-based beliefs should not be lawfully enforced upon nonbelievers. if you agree with that, then you understand the ethical contention feminists, gender critical people, and apolitical people have with gender ideology being employed in law-making.

I don't think I can explain my internal sense of gender to you because you don't have one. Same way as I wouldn't be able to explain the colour red to someone with achromatic vision. Or explain the smell of strawberries to someone who was born without a sense of smell. I'm aroace, and have never had someone successfully explain what attraction feels like to me because I don't feel it, and cannot conceptualise that feeling.

actually, you can describe color to a color-blind person, and you can also describe scent to one who can’t smell, because they are material concepts, not abstract concepts. the explanation may be long-winded, because some concepts can’t be explained with a few words, but that doesn’t make them untrue. in the same vein, i will never know what it feels like to be a conjoined twin, but it can be explained to me because it’s a material concept. just because you’re unlikely to precisely replicate those senses for those who don’t have them doesn’t mean they’re incapable of understanding what they are materially. the same cannot be said for internal gender and other spiritual beliefs.

I won't dwell on this much further because it's not really the main point of this discussion. It's a question of philosophy, not something observable like societal gender or sexual characteristics.

philosophy is relevant when arguing ethics, though, so it shouldn’t be ruled out in a discussion about gender ideology and whether or not it has a material base.

now, in your first reblog to kkoffin, you explain that since secondary sex characteristics vary, that means that sex is mutable and belongs on a spectrum. i’ll pose a few questions to demonstrate why that claim fails.

are men in the year 2025 more female than men who existed in 25 a.d. because human testosterone levels have dropped since then? were the women in 25 a.d. more male than women in 2025 because their testosterone levels were higher on average? if a woman has her breasts amputated because of breast cancer, does that make her more male? are men with gynecomastia more female than men without it? are female hyenas more male than other female animals because their clitorises look like penises from afar? are male seahorses more female than other male animals because their role in sexual reproduction is to gestate and birth offspring?

as you can see, defining sex by secondary sex characteristics is not a reliable metric for determining sex across species (let alone humans), which is important because sex is not unique to humans. it’s not even defined by chromosomes, because all species that reproduce sexually do not have xx or xy chromosomes.

sex is defined by which organism produces the large gamete (female) and which organism produces the small gamete (male). and that definition encapsulates the enormous variety of secondary sex characteristics across all species.

"Brain sex" would also be a form of continuous sexual characteristic distribution (though tbh I don't love the concept. And the research I've seen shows a pretty tenuous link)

you’re right to feel that brain sex is a dubious “theory,” because brain structure emerges out of neuroplasticity. it changes with development and depends greatly on environmental factors, not sex. it’s been debunked under numerous studies and is agreed upon to be false.

The emphasis on biological sex in the gender critical community, to me, seems to be where the main disagreement with trans issues actually stems from. Since so many trans people's dysphoria stems from physical sexual characteristics, any community that emphasises that as the most important thing about a person will be triggering.

the reason biological sex is so important to feminists and gender critical people is because the society we live in is founded upon it. women are oppressed because of their sex, not because of an internal gender identity which the vast majority of women don’t have. that may trigger a trans person’s dysphoria, but women should not have to silence themselves when they speak out against their oppression because of that. honestly, people who get triggered by surface-level feminism need to do some introspection on why they feel that their personal dysphoria is more important than the global war on women.

And on a personal note, I don't understand how emphasising physical sex characteristics is progressive when biological differences between men and women have been used to justify misogyny since the dawn of time.

you’ve answered your own question. the reason feminists emphasize sex is because it’s the very reason women are still oppressed to this day. we need to be able to identify the root of the problem in order to solve it. your statement employs the same silencing tactic that racists use against racial groups who speak out against their race-based oppression: “well if they wanted to end racism, they would just stop talking about it!”

At its core, “gender critical” ideology has nothing to do with transgender ideology. There’s three main beliefs that create a gender critical ideology and none of them have anything to do with or stem from trans issues.

1. Sex is a physical and material reality. You can touch and hold a penis or vagina. You can measure testosterone or oestrogen differences between men and women. You can study any inherent differences in the brain. Yes, intersex people also exist. That difference in sex development is also a material reality.

2. Gender is a social construct. A conservative, patriarchal invention that believes (as a modern example) women must like dresses and men must like pants. Women like pink and men like blue, or in other cultures or times, other ideas. This is not a material reality, it’s only socialisation. Nothing about material reality makes women like pink. There may be some debate regarding where sex stops and gender socialisation begins, as scientific analysis of the brain has not developed enough to know exactly what is inherent and what is part of the socialisation which starts at (or before) birth.

3. The social construct of gender should be abolished, as it is the foundation of a patriarchy. Women are given gender roles which revolve around being subordinate and submissive, as to obey the patriarch, and men’s gender roles are to be aggressive and strong, as to serve in the military. Sex differences are to be respected and gender is to be abolished. Decisions regarding safety, medical care, and other treatment of people should be based on sex, material reality which effects everyone, not gender.

The issue with trans ideology only comes in where in order to transition gender, gender as a social construct must be maintained. To feel “validated” in changing gender, gender must become more important and more recognised than sex. It pushes that decisions regarding the treatment of and protection of people should be made based on gender rather than sex, entirely opposite to the gender critical belief. Gender needs to be reinforced and protected for the ideology to make any sense at all, otherwise, what are you transitioning to?

Gender critical ideology does not target trans people or ideology. It targets a misogynistic social construct. It is not about trans people or ideologies. It is about a misogynistic social construct and its abolition. It’s just that trans ideology happens to rely on that misogynistic construct which gender critical ideology aims to abolish, and thus, they are opposed.

Gender critical ideology is only anti-patriarchy and anti-conservative. Gender belongs to patriarchy and conservatism. Transgender ideology only has issues with gender critical ideology because it is built on gender and falls apart without it.

I am aware gender dysphoria exists. Gender dysphoria would not exist if gender did not exist. Would you rather children develop gender dysphoria and spend thousands of dollars attempting to free themselves of it, suffering for years in the meantime, or that that suffering not exist in the first place? You can argue all you want that sex dysphoria is the real issue, but if that’s the case, call it such and we can learn to deal with it, but for now it’s an entirely different topic since gender ideology chooses to revolve around “gender” instead.

[nekoyawn5]

Since Crowley card and the event NRC Magical Assault or Arcane Combat Drills in en server is coming on 14th February (yay Valentine), I wanna share the guide based on my experience that I write on reddit here the link. I also linked some useful resources from twstsoku and wiki.gg!

But I could share the guide it in here too in case something happened with my reddit post, bit long post ahead! Copy-paste from my reddit post:

Introduction:

So, what is this event along with the faculty staff cards? First, you might be familiar with the battle mechanic that was first introduced in Book 7. The difference that makes this more difficult than the famous 6-66 & 6-67 is the damaged HP you got from the previous battle is carried to the next battle. And this is where HP BUDDY BONUS IS VERY IMPORTANT! I’m going to explain this later, but trust me, this is going to save you a lot.

Second, this event is aimed toward veteran players that own, build, and raise high spell levels for each character, just like in Book 6, where you are obligated to build multiple cards of the same characters. Also lower rarity card are very useful too in here don't hesitate to build them! Don’t force yourself if you can’t beat all enemies tiles.

Third, this event is using a stamina or Advancement Points (no confirmation name for en) similar to Mystium from Book 7. But in here is recover every 1 hour, so 10 hours to max full recover them. I recommend not postponing this event 3 or 2 days before the event ends. There's also another item named Move Ticket (also no confirmation name for en) to give you a recovery of 1 move; use it if you don't want to wait for hours or need to rush.

And lastly, unfortunately, I cannot give the guide for which character recommendation to bring because it is up to your roster, so go get crazy with your team. As long as you remember their HP buddy bonuses, who.

Also spoilers because I might be using the JP server content or images!

Here the tips for the event from my experience:

I assume you guys familiar with Book 7 fight. First you’re going to pick cards, for first three battle map you choose up to 5 characters, and later more slots will be added until the final map brings up to 10 characters.

If you pull the faculty card, e.g., Crowley, Crewel, or Trein, they are going to appear in your card selector with HP & ATK buffs without having to pick them for the team!

I recommend grabbing any characters that own HP buddy bonuses mutualy each other. Bring your character card, which you own multiple build copies of, and bring multiple elements cards.

I mentioned HP buddy bonuses are important, they give you an extra HP reservation, so if you took damage after battling, it decreases reserve HP from your card buddy bonus first before directly from their HP! For example, Dorm Riddle and Dorm Azul, both of them got mutual minor HP boosts, and the of the team rest is up to you.

Thanks from u/ Electric-Chemicals on reddit reminds me that these HP buddy bonuses replenish between fights unlike the main card HP. So take advantage of this!

Bring a lot of Healing Cards; you're going to need them a lot in here. My usual strategy is to use a strong attack in turn 1 or 2 to leave the enemy on low HP at the end of turn 2. Then use all healing spells in turn 3 and finish the fight in turn 3 with the first attack. With these, you're going to finish the fight with full HP or only small damage.

You can see the healing spells list here. But the downside in this strategy is requiring the good RNG.

Because of the RNG you might choose the wrong element and take a lot of damage from the enemy. I suggest you exit and restart the battle; it reduces your attempt though. But better than losing your card.

Focus on reaching the buff tile first, the one with the star icon. And try picking the lower difficulty map first, the one with fewer stars, before tackling the higher battles. No fight when entering the buff tile, so don't worry!

Don’t go immediately to the final boss tile if you want to complete all battles for mission rewards or pick the item chest first. What happened is after you clear the map and you want to go back to grab the unclaimed chest or fight, the map reseted again and you must start all over again from beginning!

If you see heal and revive tile. I suggest ignoring them first until half or some of the map is finished, or before the boss, if desperate when all of your cards are in critical or faint you can use it, but keep in mind this tile only heals and revives 3-5 random cards.

Another tip that if you still own your Retry Tickets, you can use them to revive and heal 5 allies that you choose. Or you can just buy them in the shop if you want to spend 10 gems. Some of the later map own a chest rewards you 1 retry ticket btw!

And in the later map, the boss HP is going to increase a lot; it can reach up to 200k! Don't worry if you lose on your first attempt; I mean, your HP is 0 during the fight, and your card fainted, not quitting the map. Because the boss HP remaining is not resetting to full. By the way, this also applied to every fight on the map; all of the stages got mini bosses with a lot of HP and annoying debuffs (I'm looking at you, blind debuff).

PSA:

If you don’t want to win all battles and only want the rewards chest, I can suggest some tips from JP players about the quickest path and fewer tiles to the boss and for you focusing on getting the buffs and claiming the item rewards.

Here a guide from JP Twstsoku forum. I assume we got Crowley first for NA, it’s in Japanese but still easy to understand link for the fastest route: here

Also, another guide I want to share if you wanted to see this example from the Crewel event map along with the enemies too, but it looks like they don’t have the Crowley map, from this twst wiki.gg: here

[iseetheisland]

You know what? Me having trouble keeping eye contact isn't even potential evidence I'm autistic after all because I just realized part of the reason I auto-avoid it is because of how many people in my life have taken that as consent to try and kiss me so what the fuck is up with that???

I'm not the one who needs to be trying to explain and understand over here when I was trained to be this way

[hazel2468]

Something that I need people to understand, especially on this hellsite. Is that oppression does not depend on who you actually are.

It depends on how the world sees you.

If the world sees you as X identity. They will treat you as X identity, whether you are or not. If the world sees that you are not X identity, but they can use the oppression of X identity as a cudgel to make you act the way they want you to? They will use it.

Oppression is NOT dependent on who you actually are. It depends on how the world sees you. It depends on how people see you and what they decide to put on you because of that.

Oh. And when someone experiences a form of oppression that is NOT based in the reality of who they are? It's still that kind of oppression. It's not "misdirected"- it is still that kind of oppression being leveraged to maintain the current social climate.

[orchidyoonkook]

KIKI!!!!!! I know I already screamed at you in DMs but holy shit dude!! I'm so spoiled in your love <<<33333. My coworkers literally looked at me like I was nuts because of how near manic my smile was reading this. I cannot believe you wrote all this about my babies. They love you so much too!!

can i just say how i am totally captivated by this fic once again just going back and reading everything again had me mesmerized by this plot line,

YOU REREAD IT???!!!! 😭😭😭😭♥♥♥ I love your love for them so much. You make me wanna keep writing every time I see your name in my inboxes with your delicious words. I eat them up in record time, every time.

The plot line was VERY plotted so I'm glad it's being given a moment to shine!!!!

seriously it is so good you guy have no idea, it's written to perfection that you are completely be drawn into the story, just like a movie it plays out in front of your eyes as you read the words i am not even joking it's literally the best part about it that you get drawn into the fic like that it's magical I tell you...

I try so hard to get the details and imagery. The movie thing is EXACTLY what I want to happen as you read so this particular feedback makes my heart just SIIIIIIIIIINNNNNGGG.

Also I will cry at "it is so good you have no idea" because I'm trying so hard to write stories worth reading, ones you don't go "meh" afterwards. Like I want the folks who read them to be happy they spent their free time reading my stories, so I cannot stress enough how much hearing things like this motivates me, thrills me, and fills me with the most incredible happiness.

sorry for the babbling on

NEVER! No sorries, I live for the babble. I love to yap, babble, whichever, gimmie all of it no bars held.

but i can't fully express how much i love this fic and i can't not mention the prince and me because it just reminds me of it especially oc's personality and how she works so hard to achieve her goals i love it so much,

I LOVE THAT MOVIE

It was not any part of the inspiration for this fic tho! Funny enough, but now that you mention it, you're so totally right, (minus the initially douchey prince) but holy cow the similarities are kinda wild now that I'm thinking about it. I sweat it wasn't intentional XD

yoon your words, how you describe oc passion and jungkook's desires it's just beautiful you build the scenes so well and not only that the emotions, their thoughts it's like you are one with the character and this world you have build it sometimes brings me to tears to read the way your wrote their thoughts like in chapter 3 I literally had tears in my eyes...

emotions are so hard dude, especially as an AuDHD girly. So i again, try so hard to get them right. I just experience emotions differently than 'regular' folk, in a way that's hard to describe and feel, therefore, making emotions and desires hard for me to describe and write into my characters. So confirmations like this help me a lot to know that what I'm doing is working for the readers!!

(also not me and going back to reread chapter three so I could remember what you were hinting at there XD)

I was honestly blown away and that scene in the at the cafe when they are truly just themselves, i can't stop saying this but they way you write is pure gold and i hang on all of your words, the way oc and jungkook conversations just flow and holds so much meaningful moments like i can't describe it but it feels more like just a conversation for a story it just latches on to my heart and i feel like your words have so much meaning behind them, the placement of certain words, what they talk about it's like poetry if i am being honest i feel like there should be an analysis of each line or thought that they have that's the best way I can describe it...

The words do in fact have loads of meaning behind them, they are all also intentionally chosen and placed, so you nailed that to a T. But that being said, I did go back and reread this scene and I sae a good handful of mistakes (grammar and double uses of words close togehter). And thats what I get for editing chapters so quickly after writing them, I don't catch those XD.

It's so funny you mention poetry because you aren't the first person to compare my writing style to poetry, and that's funny to me because I don't like poetry 😂😂. Like at all. I could/can never get the meanings behind it like other people were abel to do (hello un/diagnosed AuDHD literal thinking brain)

An analysis would be so cool. Vi (violetsiren90) does that for me sometimes and she'll get meanings out of my words that I didn't even intend to have, but there she goes, everytime, making me out to be way better of a writer than I really am XD

jumping into ch. 5 can i just say i love oc's spirals about the jungkook dating news i don't wanna spoil it but gosh i love her trying to decipher why it's that girl, why out of the people in the world it's her

omg OC is just like me FRRRRR. I spiral think about everythhiinnngggg. and it's gotta be her for the plot, i dont make the rules except yes I do

i really enjoyed that and her subtle inclusion of herself in the comparisons hehehehe oc i see you, also i am with Yuri and oc on the hate train, oc's just hilarious in that conversation i love it..

I love seeing everyones reactions to Her, because obviously from a literary POV she's written in to be a villainous type of character, but from an I created this human being from my mind POV, I know why she is the way she is, and in the wise words of Ender Wiggin "I think it’s impossible to really understand somebody, what they want, what they believe, and not love them the way they love themselves."

As for OC doing the subtle comparisons, I loved that because it makes her that much more human and real to me.

so the slow ass burn warning was very much needed hey wow no I still can't believe jk did a whole post with that girl and didn't tell oc, i somewhat get where his coming from but cmon how did he think she would react especially since their friendship is so strong and they clearly care about one another hehehe

slow burns are my fav and you can bet your ass it. is. slow. i make no apologies. I've had the plot plotted for three years now and I've loved the arc for just as long. I hope you will too

I think we as people, often forget that JK is a boy, and even though hes a nice boy with big responsibilites in this story with his title and all that, he is still, a boy. And boys arent the best at remembering to tell people stuff XD. also he like,, really didnt want to tell OC XDD

and jk's spiral after she confronts him ouch the slowest burn ever and the angst got me hooked,

😈😈😈😈😈 I love yearning so much, it really just makes a story that much more story centered.

i am absolutely looking forward to how things proceed between jk and this girl and oc's take on everything will she be able to focus on her time with nel

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IT'S BEEN SO FUN TO WRITE THIS!!! The back and forth, the similarities, the differences, all of it between the two couples, oh it's so fun to compare and contrast them.

i'm pretty sure she's gonna have jk on the brain

no comment.

(also not sure if i mentioned it but I am sooooo not team this girl she's clearly soaking up all the influence jk brings and the complete opposite of what jk needs and she's oc's nemesis so not my vibe i can only imagine a scene where this girl just says the wrong thing in oc's presence and oc just flips and gives her a piece of her mind oooohh I hope that

i really wanna say something about this point specifically. but i CANT because it spoils something in a future currently unwritten, but very well documented plot wise, chapter. so just know that i wanna but cant.

(also the giggle /eye roll, which i totally blame on oc by the way, that i let out when i read this man was at a party making out with this girl, jk whatcha doing my guy??????)

excellent. As we can clearly tell from his tone in the chapter he was having an absolute BLAST (sarcasm). Very much: *through gritted teeth* "I love my job" of him.

lemme hop on into the next chapter and see jk's thought this man better explain himself 😉🤭🖤

EXCITEEEEEEEEMENTTTTTTTT!!!!!!!!!

okay!!! i have officially spent about two hours writing this reply now (between writing, and having to go back and reread stuff and then wiritnig and rereading) so i hope it's a good response! if you have anymore questions or talking points, you know where I am. And if it wasn't blatantly obvious: Thank you. Thank you thank you thank you. for all the kind words and the theories and the thoughts. I cannot thank you enough for this. Thank you.

xo, Yoon

To What We Were Before, And All The Things After | JJK | Ch. 5

Title: Shocking Announcements and Camouflaged Explanations

Pairing: Prince!College Student!JK x Fine Arts Major!(F)!Reader

Series Rating//Genre: (M) | College AU, Mild Royalty AU, Smut, Angst, Fluff, S2F2L, Indiffernce to lovers, sloooowwww ass burn

Summary: I'm sorry the prince is dating WHO?

Warnings: PG16, swearing, drinking, pining, angsssttttttttt, Jk has a lot of feelings, and so does Reader. Yuri being Yuri. Adaline being Adaline. TOUCH of fluff.

Word Count: 6,006

Release Date: October 20, 2023, 2:00PM

A/N 1: brain mush. finally out. Thank you for understanding. Already working on 6.

Series: Chapter One | Chapter Two | Chapter Three | Chapter Four

It’s 2:30pm on the Wednesday before fall reading week. 

Saturday’s looking so beautiful. Sunny skies and comfortable temperatures. 

It’s 2:30pm on the Wednesday before the Friday you get to see Nel for the first time since August. 

And by god you can’t wait. You’re counting the days, minutes and seconds till he’s in front of you again. 

But it’s also 2:30pm on the Wednesday after you mysteriously woke up in your bed after movie night.  And that thought alone has been in the back of your mind since you opened your eyes Monday morning. 

You’d thought about asking Jungkook what happened, but also didn’t think you could face the mortification if his answer was the one you almost 100% knew it was going to be. Hell, you could already feel the nose dive your stomach would make towards pavement the second you got confirmation. 

So instead, like any other rational person, you shelved it away in the back corner of your brain. Far, far back, hopefully being covered with dirt and cobwebs and lint as the days pass on. 

Though you have a nagging feeling that someone or something keeps dusting—anyways, there are much more important things to be focusing on. 

Currently at the greenhouse cafe, you’re sipping on hot chocolate and painting this week's florals on a canvas almost half the size of you. Perched onto an easel, a bunch of sunflowers is beginning to take shape when your phone dings so many times you're worried someone’s dead. 

Dropping your brush, you scoop it up from its place on the edge of the table, only to see a series of texts from Yuri, and you loose a worried breath.

Her contact name is the same from when you two went to a party the first night of freshman year. While you were sipping from your first and only drink that night, Yuri was sloshed out her mind and slurring her words. And thus, SlurryYuri was born.

She whines every time she sees you still haven’t changed it. You were never going to, of course.

SlurryYuri [2:32pm]: BITCH

Oh, here we go. 

SlurryYuri [2:33pm]: YOU WILL NEVER GUESS WHO WENT SOCIAL MEDIA OFFICIAL TODAY SlurryYuri [2:33pm]: BABE ANSWER SlurryYuri [2:33pm]: ANSWER ANSWER ANSWERRRRR SlurryYuri [2:34pm]: YNNNNNNNN

You [2:34pm]: Take a breath why dont you

SlurryYuri [2:34pm]: FINALLY.  SlurryYuri [2:34pm]: By the gods YN…  SlurryYuri [2:35pm]: ANYWAY SlurryYuri [2:35pm]: JUNGKOOK SlurryYuri [2:35pm]: as in PRINCE Jungkook SlurryYuri [2:36pm]: is dating ADALINE. SlurryYuri [2:36pm]: as in #1 ENEMY OF THE STATE EVIL BITCH ADALINE.

You spit out what was left of the hot chocolate in your mouth. 

Thankfully, you had some of your mind about you and managed not to ruin your painting by turning your head…couldn’t say the same for the cafe wall though. Rustic brick now splattered with a lovely, Pollock-esque spray of brown.

Oops.

But Jungkook and…Adaline? That doesn’t make any sense whatsoever.

He hasn’t mentioned anything about this to you. You speak to him every day, see him almost every day, and nothing? Not a peep? A morsel? A hint? Nothing?

Maybe you two aren’t as close as you thought you were.

To be fair, you didn’t tell him about Nel. And now that you think about it, you haven’t seen or heard much from Jungkook since Sunday, which is unusual. He’s normally stuffing your inbox full of messages as the sun rises and sets, yet he’s sent maybe two a day since then.

You thought he was just busy with schoolwork.

Spiraling, you can’t help but wonder how long they’ve been seeing one another. How long he’s kept this little secret—not that it’s any of your business anyway, but he’s always seemed so open with you, with just about everything. So the fact that he kept this from you? What does that say? 

Does he think you’d react like any other girl? That you would scream and cry and mourn and tell him he’s making a mistake, that you’re his true love? Like Adaline would if he weren’t dating her? 

As if! And he knows that.

He knows that…right?

Doesn’t matter. Yes it does. No it doesn’t. 

Ugh! Whatever!

Does he even know who Adaline really is? Or does she put on a mask in front of him too, like she does everyone else. She must because now you wonder how he could even possibly like someone like her, knowing…well her! 

Bitchiness and duchess-ness aside, you and Adaline are incredibly similar, and Jungkook has never had any interest in you whatsoever, thank god. You and Adaline are both fine arts majors, both top of your class, talented, driven. You both work tirelessly for what you want, and don’t let others get in your way to success. Though only one of you will cheat if you have too, morals be damned. You both want your lives to yourself, to make your own path, to be trailblazers in your chosen fields.  

That kind of woman doesn’t seem like Jungkook's type. 

He needs someone who will follow him, and allow him to lead the nation. Someone who is okay submitting to him and his needs for the good of the people and the betterment of the Western Shores. He needs a politically inclined cheerleader, for lack of better phrasing. And that isn’t Adaline at all…or you, if you're still putting yourself in this conversation, which you’re not.  

Also, wasn’t it a rule that princes could only marry princesses? Or was it that nice, genuine people shouldn’t end up with assholes who use and abuse those around them for social status and power? And isn’t that a thing for him too—that he hates when people use him for his name?

So how could he go for her? You can’t fathom a goddamn reason as to why—

Ah…Well.

You can, but you hate it. 

Adaline is beautiful, and while no, not a princess, she does have a title the prince can be seen with in public without ridicule, friend or more than. Someone who wouldn’t be looked at like a charity case or a flavour of the week. Someone who’s used to the media. Adaline doesn’t have to hide from them. Isn’t scared to be seen by them with him. It wouldn’t ruin her future. It’ll only add to i—Wait.

Holy shit.

Adaline comes from one of the most influential families on the Eastern Shores. One with a lot of political power. Like, best friends with the Queen of the Eastern Shores, political power. Though she was only ever graced with sons. Adaline’s probably the closest thing she has to a daughter.

A marriage between Jungkook and Adaline could potentially unify the two sides again. 

Jungkook and Adaline could re-unite the East and West after centuries of war and separation, and current amicable co-existence.

Now that’s a reason he would date her. to become power couple of the century.

The next step in history. 

The whole idea of them makes more and more sense the more you think about it. Adaline, darling of the East marrying the future King of the West. And your stomach curls in on itself. 

Just because it makes sense doesn’t mean you have to like it. 

And you pray to whatever god or gods there are in this universe that he keeps her away from you and out of your conversations. Jungkook’s relationship isn’t any of your business, nor your interest, but you don’t know how well you’d be able to keep your mouth shut about her if he asks anything. 

You know he likes that you’re honest. That you don’t hide things from him others would just to please him. But at what point do you put that aside to keep the peace in an otherwise very comfortable and still blossoming friendship? At what point does honesty become an obstacle rather than a building block?

You know that if Jungkook ever meets Nel and happens not to like him he would keep his mouth shut, mostly. Hopefully. He may give you a hard time but that’s just him. Jungkook knows your relationship is important to you, that it and Nel, make you happy. He would respect that.

So again, who are you to speak ill of the person he’s chosen for himself? Maybe he knows something you don’t, sees something in her that you haven’t.

Just…Why did it have to be Adaline?

He could have anyone, anyone—on campus, in the West, the East, for the love of god, he could have anyone in the entire ass realm he wants! It’s easy to forget when he speaks with his mouth full, dresses in baggy, comfy clothes, and whines about movie choices, but Jungkook is still Prince of the Western Shores. 

He’s still the most eligible bachelor on the continent.  

Yet somehow he chose the one person you can’t stand to be within 1000 feet of. He chose the one person you never thought he would’ve liked for himself because underneath everything, she is everything he claims to hate. 

He chose Adaline Dupree. 

So yeah, you wonder why he hid it from you. Why he felt like he couldn’t tell you. Sure, you hated her, but he doesn’t know that. Probably.

Maybe his love life is something he keeps private? Everyone has that right, and maybe that’s what he’s used to doing due to his every choice being splashed on every news and media outlet there is. 

You roll your eyes. Merciless vultures. 

So maybe he’s not used to sharing this side of himself with others. Maybe that’s why he didn’t tell you anything. 

And with all of this chaos now flitting around your brain, you failed to notice the little slice of pain behind your sternum the more they ricochet around up there. You’re hurt. 

You didn’t expect it to hurt. 

Out of everything you could feel about this: confusion, anger, exasperation, annoyance, you don’t feel any of them. You just feel upset that he didn’t come to you about it. Didn’t feel like he could discuss it with you. 

You are the person your friends—old and new—come to talk to. Always have been. You’re the one who has the rational, well thought out advice. The common sense distributor. The one sought out to help, regardless of the situation. 

And you love it. You love that you’re able to help your friends. Love that they trust you with such things. That you’re the person they seek assistance and guidance from. The ear they bounce their thoughts off of. You’ve always been told you have ‘knowledge beyond your years’ as your mother says. You take pride in that. It gives your life that much more meaning. 

So even though you don’t want to, and know you shouldn’t, because it has nothing to do with you and you know that…you’re taking this as somewhat of a personal blow. 

Maybe you’re losing your touch. You hope not.

But, you need to react like you normally would. Like you still hate the prince for how he humiliated Yuri, just like she hates Adaline for you. Solidarity between best friends, even if it’s fake.

Come on YN you got this, you think to yourself.

You [2:40pm]: I almost feel sorry for him. After how he treated you tho? They deserve each other

No they don’t, no they don’t, no they don’t. 

He deserves so much better.

SlurryYuri [2:40pm]: I’m just surprised he went for her tbh SlurryYuri [2:41pm]:  isnt she like a total bitch? To you at least?  SlurryYuri [2:41pm]: like just knowing what I do from the tiny bit of time I spent with him, she doesn’t really seem to be his type

Vindication!

You [2:42pm]: uh yeah, like 100% yes. Shes a rich party girl who doesnt know the word punishment, always gets what she wants, regardless if she works for it or not. And takes it when she especially doesnt deserve it You [2:43pm]: probably explains how she got him 🙄

Vivian pops outside to check in, and takes the couple steps to reach your table, some napkins and a large cup of water in hand.

“Hey! Are you okay? I saw that spit take and one; wow, that was impressive. But two; is everything alright?” she asks, passing you the napkins. The water gets thrown on the wall to wash off the splatter.

You wipe up your chin and remnants of projected hot chocolate on the table.

“Sorry, thank you. Yes, I’m fine,” you lie easily. A little scared of how easy it’s becoming. “I just learned some really shocking news is all. I shouldn’t have read it with a full mouth.”

“Oh! That makes sense. I hope whatever it is turns out fine.” 

“Thanks, me too.” 

You know Vivian means well, but she doesn’t know that that is the very last thing you want. You want Adaline’s corruptive, cutthroat, cruel nature away from Jungkook. 

But is he just Jungkook anymore?  

You’ve spent enough time together to consider him a friend, a close friend even. You’ve grown to care for him, platonically, similar to the way you do Yuri. And the fact that you want Adaline as far away from him as she can get so he doesn't go through whatever shit she’ll inevitably get him wrapped up in, definitely says something.

Adaline loves many things—art, fashion, publicity—but the thing she likes better than anything else? 

Attention.

She thrives on it. The more eyes on her the better. She’s a ‘there’s no such thing as bad press’ type, and you worry what that means for him.

Especially now that she’s taken them public—because you know it was her that did it, he would have never—and she’s going to be the hottest topic in all of the newest news cycles. 

Say they’ve been seeing one another since the beginning of the school year? Just a guess, but a likely correct one—you shiver at the thought. That’s less than seven weeks to get to know one another before camera crews and reporters start breathing down their necks. They’ll ask and comment on everything you thought you might go through at one point. But unlike you, Adaline will face it head on with a smile and win them over. Gladly welcome them with open arms.

Because exactly like Jungkook fears with everyone new, she desires everything a relationship with him would give her. 

Status, fame, power, wealth, brand sponsorships, popularity, jealousy, people wishing they could be her. You couldn’t build a better trap to lure her into if you tried. 

Jungkook is potentially unknowingly feeding her already enormous ego simply by publicly dating her. And it dawns on you that your classes with her are going to become even more insufferable.

Great. 

You don’t even know if she’s going to care that she has him. As wonderful, kind and talented as Jungkook is, you have a very good sense that she’ll be just like rest; happy to receive what he can give her, and not a damn to be given about him.

So now you worry. You worry for him and for his safety and for his feelings.

Because that’s what friends do. 

Right?

“Hey.”

You look up to see Jungkook rounding the back corner to the cafe, backpack slung over a shoulder, mask, hat and hoodie all too familiar. You’d be able to spot him a mile away now, it’s all in his posture and eyes. 

Maybe he should invest in some sunglasses. 

And slouch.

You’re elbows deep in yellow and brown paint from the sunflowers that now fill the canvas in front of you. You’ve been experimenting with texture, oil paint thicker in some places to give off a more 3D effect. Stripes of green carved into the medium by the edge of a long palette knife mimic stems, and fat leaves placed with precision also riddle the cloth. 

As he nears, you try your best not to come off as upset, pissed off or worried when you reply.

“Hey,” you fail miserably, sounding exactly like you’re all kinds of upset, and pissed off, and worried. 

Shit.

Like always, he notices immediately.

“Everything okay?” he’s taking his spot at the table beside you, the one that seats four, having abandoned his original one weeks ago. 

You two both found yourselves here so frequently that over time, he started sitting next to you without asking. Always in the same spots. Always side by side. Him at the closest chair to you, you at the same one you always have.

Sure, you two shared movie nights and fun messages, you talk everyday and pretty much talk about whatever you want. But when it comes to academics, he knows he has to tread water a little differently around you. He can’t constantly start conversations the way he would at movie night when you’re at the greenhouse cafe. You’re here to work and to study, and if he wants to be there too, he has to respect that about you, and know not to take it personally. 

So you work together in comfortable silence most of the time, occasionally breaking it to have a conversation, get snacks, or pose for one another’s homework. It’s become another routine you share, an unspoken agreement that when you were both there at the same time, you worked together. 

And you haven’t minded since that first time. The one when you decided to say yes to your friendship. 

You welcome it. Welcome him. His presence. 

Company’s nice to have when it’s wanted. 

When it’s him.

And whether you know it or not, you seem to work better when you are in each other's immediate orbit. You work better when he works alongside you, able to focus better due to body doubling and  to have a second opinion at the ready when you need it. Just like he worked better when you worked alongside him, a willing model any time he needed, and an open ear when he wanted to work something out.  

You two just work. And because of this, he also picks up when something isn’t quite right with the atmosphere you two have created. 

Play it off YN.

“Yeah, just focused. Sorry.”

He doesn’t believe you for a second. When you focus you have a very distinct look on your face, eyes clearer, an eyebrow constantly quirked in self reflection, and that isn’t the one you have on right now. 

But he lets it slide. For now. Somethings up with you, and he knows better than to push you before you’re ready.

“That’s okay. I’m running in, need anything?”

“I’m good, thanks,” you go back to painting, barely acknowledging him and shutting out the outside world. 

Yeah, something’s definitely up.

You’re ignoring him so hard you don’t notice Jungkook lifting your hot chocolate just enough to feel it’s empty. 

Vivian’s behind the counter as he enters and takes off his mask to flash her a wide smile.

“Hey Vivian, how are you today?”

She blushes like she does every time he comes in, hands slowing in their task. 

“Hey JK, I’m good. You?” He had to ask her about a hundred times to drop the ‘your highnesses,’ ‘you majesty’s,’ and ‘prince’s.’ Telling her it really was okay, and that no, she wasn’t going to get in trouble for it. It took her some time, but eventually she came around and it’s made his experience here so much better. So much more normal.

She’d settled on JK because ‘it makes me feel like I’m listening to what you want while also not feeling guilty and weird about calling you Jungkook without the prince part.’

He could work with that logic.

“I’m alright, could I get my usual and a hot chocolate for YN? With a little extra secret ingredient if you're so inclined?” You shared the not so secret stash secret with Jungkook about a week after you said yes.  “She seems upset. Have you noticed anything off lately? Has she said anything to you?”

Jungkook peruses the pastry display while Vivian starts on his drink.

“Not really, she did a wicked spit take earlier about some news her friend told her, but said she was fine, just surprised. Besides that, focused maybe? Or maybe the opposite of that and a little distracted?” She thinks for a second. “Does she have an exam coming up that you know about? She gets a little weird before those.”

He knows exactly what’s meant by that. Witnessed it himself, bunny slippers and all.

But no, you don’t. Your midterms aren’t until the first week of November, nearly two weeks away. You started studying for them last week.

He spots egg tarts in the back corner of the pastry display, hiding. Perfect.

“I don’t think that’s it, but thanks though. I’ll get it out of her eventually, especially if I have one of those egg tarts to butter her up first,” he says in a questioning tone to ask for one while pointing at them.

Vivian smiles a knowing smile. He wants to know what it means because she’s worn it around him for a while now, and he’s half tempted to ask at this point. 

“I think that could be arranged.”

Jungkook pays and heads to your tables again. You’re still locked into your own world of colour and canvas. He subtly sets down the hot chocolate and bagged tart so that you won’t notice until you pop the bubble you’re in.

Halfway through a business assignment he hears your surprise. The weird look on your face finally breaking, a grateful one taking its place as you peek at him.

A soft, genuine, “thank you,” finds his ears as your lips meet lid, and you can’t meet his eye. He knows you often forget to drink or eat when you’re in the zone. 

Maybe now with a warm drink and some goodies in your belly, you’re willing to talk about it.

“You sure everything’s okay?” he asks again.

Your deep sigh and unfocused gaze says enough to him. 

You are willing to talk.

Quietly, almost ashamed sounding, you ask, “Why didn't you tell me about her?”

Her? 

Oh.

Oh… 

You meant Adaline. Why hadn’t he told you about Adaline. 

“Why did I find out an hour ago from Yuri screaming at me through text messages and not from you? Is it something you’re private about? Do you not trust me?”

The truth was that he was hoping to keep it under wraps for a bit longer, actually, hoping you never found out so he wouldn’t have to explain the reason why. 

He still doesn’t have too, and he won’t. Not the real reason.

He won’t ruin things. He can’t.

But he also should have known better. Should have known that not telling you would hurt you instead. Of course he trusted you.

You talk everyday, sometimes for hours, sometimes just to check in. You hang out during the week, whether it be at the cafe like you are right now, or for Sunday movie night. 

Six weeks isn’t a long time, but it was plenty when he thinks about how much time you two have already spent together, how much you’ve gotten to know one another. 

How comfortable you are in each other’s presence. 

Six weeks isn’t a long time, but it feels like you’ve always been there with him, listening, cheering, supporting.

Six weeks isn't a long time, and yet it feels like it’s been forever.

Of course you’re hurt he didn’t tell you. So he doesn’t lie to you, but he also doesn’t tell you the full truth.

“Oh…uh, that.” He rubs a hand at the nape of his neck. “That just kind of happened recently actually, like Monday recently. My father’s been really pressuring me to find someone to court,” and I couldn’t go with my first choice. “So I did.”

“And you went with Adaline?” You ask carefully.

“Uh, yeah? Is there something wrong with her?”

Adaline isn’t his first, second or tenth choice. She's his father’s choice. Might as well appease him and at least try with this girl. It’s going…fine, so far. 

Adaline wanted to make it social media official as soon as possible, wanted what he could give her, like everyone else. Like he expected. And so he willingly suffered through a photo session where she staged everything to make it look perfectly unposed and natural. Even though none of it was. 

She’d told him to put his arms around her waist and kiss her forehead, and it worked. The picture wasn’t bad, they both looked great. But he hated it anyway. It wasn't a spur of the moment decision, or sincere. It wasn’t a picture of two fools drunk on love, wanting to capture something beautiful for their future selves to look back on to reminisce over.

It was an uncomfortable hour and a half of touching and kissing a complete stranger, and it is the complete opposite of what he wants in a relationship. 

He wants genuine and carefree and candid. He wants honest, true feelings and social media posts saved for anniversaries and birthdays instead of using them as a mini documentary of every part of his life through pictures. 

He wants shitty birthday cakes made from scratch, and blurry polaroid pictures of kisses in the rain to put in his wallet when he’s away from them. He wants silly nicknames and inside jokes no one else will understand. 

He wants midnight walks hand in hand under moonlight and quirky habits he picks up from them. He wants pictures of precious moments and holidays celebrated between just the two of you and movie nights under blanket forts with popcorn and hot chocolate and egg tarts. 

He wants real.

He wants authentic. 

He wants love.

Not some staged artificial bullshit for an online presence that means nothing once you’re dead. 

But this is new and exciting for Adaline. He understands that a relationship with him is a very big deal, that she’s not used to it yet, and that it hasn’t been nearly long enough for him to see the true her yet. 

It’s only been 44 hours. Not that he’s counting.

So he’s going to give her some time, and have some faith that maybe she shows him that side of herself if it exists. He doesn't think she's going to change all that much for several reasons, the first being her enormous reputation, and the second being that she’s a politician's daughter, but he’s going to at least try. The way he hopes she will.

And if nothing does change, and she stays the exact same, at least she’s pretty enough to distract him. 

He knows that’s not the most mature or princely thing to do or think. In fact, he knows it’s quite asshole-ish of him, but if Adaline’s going to openly use him for her own personal gain, why shouldn’t he be able to use her just a little bit too? 

She isn’t unfamiliar with political relationships, having been born from one, so he doesn’t think she would be against it either. And it’s not like he’ll be mistreating her, quite the opposite in fact.

He’ll shower her with expensive gifts and happily take however many pictures she wants. He’ll smother her in physical affection and get or do whatever she needs in order to make her happy. 

Because as much as she clearly wants this relationship with him for whatever reason, he desperately needs it more with every passing day. He needs somewhere to put everything he’s feeling. And if that happens to be in a beautiful woman his father approves of who he could possibly, eventually grow feelings for? It’s a win-win in his book.

But at the same time, sometimes he really hates the shit he has to navigate in his Royal Life.

While Jungkook is caught in his thought spiral, you bite your tongue. Like actually bite your tongue. 

Don’t say shit Y/N. 

Don't say anything.

It’s not your business. What they have together and what’s between you and Adaline are completely separate, unrelated things. One’s a rivalry and one's a relationship. Those are not the same. 

At. All. 

So, still untrusting of your mouth, you shake your head and dodge his question by changing the direction of the conversation.

“Why did you go public so quickly?” you ask, feeling like it’s the safest question you can muster. “It’s literally only been two days.”

He shrugs. “She wanted to, and I didn’t say no.”

“Courseshedid,” you mutter under your breath. That should’ve been red flag number one. Two days? Who goes social media official after two days!?

“What?”

“Nothing,” you try your best to give him the closest thing to a smile you can currently muster, forcibly removing any acid from every word. “I hope she makes you happy.”

He doesn’t tell you she was hand picked by the king for him.

That at twenty-four, he still isn’t pulling all of his own strings. It’s pathetic.

“Me too.” 

He hopes she’ll help more than anything. Even if it’s just for a little while. “I’ve never been in a public relationship before. But the kingdom and my father seem to like her, so I’m sure I will too, with time.” 

It takes all of your focus not to roll your eyes.

Of course they do. Of course the King already likes her, she’s got the attitude and knowledge for politics, so she’s perfect! Strong potential to be the heartless, ruthless Queen to what you already know will be Jungkook's kind and giving King. 

Great! Just great. That’s just…great…

Maybe you’re biased. Maybe there’s something in her that you can’t see because of your past with her. 

Maybe they really are perfect for one another and you just refuse to see it. Opposites attract, isn’t that what they say? Well Jungkook and Adaline couldn’t be more opposite of one another.

So you decide that you won’t let your personal feelings get in the way. That you’ll keep the peace and support his choice, regardless of your opinion of her, even if you hate his choice. 

And you really hate his choice.

“I have no doubt.”

The seat heater in the car you rented to pick Nel up from the airport keeps your tush toasty while you drive. 

Friday night has never felt so exciting!

You can barely sit still, the leg not pressing the pedals won’t stop bouncing and you have to sit on your hands at stop lights to try and keep calm.

God you missed him, it's only been two months since you last saw him, and yet it feels like forever. 

You have the piece of printer paper with ‘Smoosh’ printed on it in the biggest font you could have horizontally. It’s something you do every year, and every year it never fails to bring the biggest smile to Nel’s face when you wave it wildly the second you see him.

Pulling up to the terminal you keep your eyes peeled for the first parking spot you can find. Never an easy feat at this particular airport but you manage to find one somewhere in the J lot under section 1, whatever that meant. All you care about right now is that you’re decently close to the doors as you grab your phone, bag, sign, and that you’re perfectly on time.

Entering through sliding doors, you find the waiting area mostly empty, so you pick the best place to sit as you wait for his flight to land: dead center and up front. 

You can’t wait. Just a few more minutes and you’ll see him. 

You can’t wait. You can’t wait. You can't wait!

Your phone dings and you jump at it, looking for the ‘I’ve landed’ text from Nel, but it’s not from Nel.

It’s from Jungkook.

Me [10:42pm]: See you in a week. I hope you enjoy your time with Nel.

That sounds okay, right? It sounds neutral? Safe?

Like he hasn’t been dreading this week since that day you told him about it?

Jungkook hopes so. Because he wants you to enjoy your week off.

Your week off with Nel. 

And not him. 

That’s normal, he has to remind himself. That he’s not anyone particularly special to you, just a friend. Not someone you would go out of your way for to spend all your free time with over break. Not even for two hours on Sunday nights.

Just a regular, average, nothing important about him…

Friend. 

He doesn’t want to feel like this. Doesn’t want to have all of these… whatever these feelings are, about and for you.

He really doesn’t want to. But more than that, he can’t. 

He can’t have any sort of non-platonic feelings for the first person who didn’t give a shit about who he was. For the person who makes him feel more like himself than anyone else. 

For the person who has a boyfriend. 

For the person who isn’t his girlfriend.

For the person who’s you.

But he can’t fucking help it!

So he’s been shoving them down, down, down. So far down that he’s able to function around you. 

Because it’s you. 

You’re kind, and caring. Talented, beautiful, giving. Driven, smart. You respect what he asks for and what he wants for himself, not because he's the Prince demanding, but because it's him—because it’s Jungkook—that asks you, and you liste–

No! Stop it. He can’t. He can’t!

Stop, stop, stop—

You have Nel! 5 years in, loving, loyal boyfriend, probably soon to be more after graduation, Nel.

It’s expected that you would spend what little time off you have with the boyfriend you barely get to see, wouldn’t it? Makes sense that every second you have, is saved for him? 

For being happy with who makes you happy? 

Jungkook wants to see you happy. And Nel makes you happier than he’s ever seen you before, so he can’t be too upset with the guy, even though he wants to be. He wants to hate him. But how could he hate someone that gave you the smile that completely shatters his heart. 

Picasso [10:43pm]: Thanks! I will. See you soon😊

With a broken smile, he turns his phone off and puts it in his pocket.

He’s up against a wall, red cup in his hand filled with something that he’s barely touched yet, trying not to be too noticeable.

Adaline’s dragged him to some party on campus he really doesn't care about. But she said it would be good to be seen out together now that things are official. 

Out in the open, for everyone to see. For everyone to talk about.

So he went, because she asked him to. 

And now he’s regretting it. The music is shit, the people smell and everything he touches is damp or sweaty. This isn’t a part of the university experience he ever intended on participating in, but here he is. 

Adaline appears from the crowd, walking over to where he stands, a cup of her own in one hand and the other finding its way to his neck. 

One thing Jungkook’s glad for is the alcohol. Something to help his racing thoughts, pounding heart, and roiling gut. Something to drown out the world. Even if he’s only had two gulps so far. 

More, then. 

Taking a hefty swig he revels in the burn that crawls down his throat. It feels good, it makes him feel less. So he takes another one and another, and then pours his turmoiled feelings about you and Nel into Adaline’s lips. Shoving them down, further and further, until it’s like they were never even there in the first place.

The only thing that's there now is the fire in his stomach, Adaline, and her cherry flavoured lip gloss.

Chapter Six: Eastern Arrivals and Unwanted Doubt

A/N 2: I'm so sorry this took for literal ever. I never intend on taking forever but unfortunately real life gets in the way and I'm left with no creative energy to output writing I'm proud of.

A/N 3: As always, Thank you for reading, loves. Xoxo - Yoon <3

<- Back

[viserya-firstofhername]

I would put that in the tags usually, but have it in main instead (this segment was originally at the end of the post, but as soon as I wrote it I realised the only reasonable action was to put it in the beginning. Because.): Save me Mel Medarda. Save me Baela Targaryen. Save me Maeve Millay. Save me Bonnie Bennett. Save me Storm. Make of these what you will.

As a white woman raised in a time and place where there were too few black people to ever meet one in person (if you find that hard to decode—try a millennial from an ex-eastern bloc state), in a household where racism was explicitly spoken against, and by a man who was more feminist than most women I know today wish they were, I realised quite late in life what a fucking massive issue this is. Misogyny is something I had to deal with in my personal and professional life since the dawn of fucking forever, but misogynoir is a whole different game really, and while I never entertained the arrogance to claim understanding of what black women have to go through, I am and forever will be baffled why a human is judged by the colour of their skin and their chromosomes first, and merits and flaws later. Joke's on me, I guess. Also, it stands to be noted, I rarely voice my opinions about societal problems I cannot grasp the full spectre of implications of (due to my demographics, that is. I can voice all the opinions on bisexuality you wish to read), exactly because I find it disrespectful, just as I find it offensive to be speaking up when one lacks basic media (or any) literacy. Sigh. 'Tis much more often I stress if what I say/write does take into account experiences I do not fully comprehend. Anyway. The thing is.

This post needs to be printed on as many morning cups of coffee, on-demand printed t-shirts, subway walls, corporate building entrances, Tumblr walls, X-or-whatever-twitter-I-don't use-the-thing-walls, people's retinas, etc., as possible. Worded as is. So here. Have it. Read it. Digest it. Engage your brain with it. Read it again tomorrow morning. Be like me—read it twice in a row.

— this fandom has a vast misogynoirist problem and, yes, this also applies to YOU reading this right now; a post filled w unsorted thoughts you should read if you genuinely want black fans to feel safe in fandom spaces with you

i am going to preface this right away w how disappointed i am in some of the people who follow me, who will occasionally like a post calling out misogynoir but only if its comfortable and only if its worded nicely and only if its against someone they dislike and not someone they do like. i am directly talking to my non-black followers because i do not expect black fans to expose themselves to this kind of hatred and thinly (and not so thinly) veiled racism we are faced w on a daily basis. some of you have a big following and a big portion of that following is white and YOU have the opportunity to use your POWER (and, yes, even in fandoms there are different power dynamics because logging onto twitter dot com does not remove the burden of blackness within overtly white spaces, this too is a space where having white privileges will get you places) and talk about these issues that have been becoming more and more prevalent.

our voices are not heard and when they are heard they get twisted by white and non-black fans who prioritize their love for shipping and their male centeredness over racism within fandom and more importantly: racism that is perpetuated by them. a very loud portion of this fandom has painted an image of "angry black women" without ever actually calling them black women because they are socially aware enough to know that it is racist to say so. instead they say it in different ways: they call us rabid, they call us delusional, they call us homophobic straights and love to strip us of our queerness in the same breath, they call us ableists even though this fandom has had several conversations about this, they call us aggressive, they say we are jealous of a mlm ship, they say we are irrational, they call us everything but the one thing we are: black. yet the painted picture is very clear to me and surely every other black person who has ever engaged dominantly white spaces: the big black bully! this is the easiest way to "aggressive black woman" your way through genuine critcism without ever saying it w those words nor acknowledging the thing you are criticized for.

and it becomes even more obvious when you read-over and over again-those attempts at demonizing an overtly black part of fandom (which mel/meljay fandom is and which i will come back to later) while NONE ever mention the things black people ARE saying because whenever you get ratioed for cuck art, whenever you get asked why you erase mel from the story, whenever people ask where mel is in arcane character group arts, whenever you mischaracterize mel for a mlm ship, whenever you strip her of her feelings, whenever you make her an abuser, whenever you dehuminaze her, whenever you deify her, whenever you cry that you cannot criticize her yet dont ever criticize her outside of that ship you so like, whenever any of this happens black fans HAVE and WILL tell you that this is antiblack, its misogynistic, but most of all-since a word for this phenomenon already exists-it is misogynoir. you are participating in misogynoir. your every like is supporting misogynoir. the active erasure of a black woman in fandom is misogynoir. whenever you strip black fans of their credibility to speak out against racism bc we are just "crazy shippers on an agenda", that is misogynoir too. people who arent in this fandom have been clocking this. they see us saying this. they avoid watching the show or engaging w this fandom because the misogynoir is so prevalent here and it is unchallenged by everyone but black people and a few allys who actually mean their shit when they talk about allyship.

the rest of you barely skim our texts or just go "well im not racist so this doesnt apply to me" instead of listening to us trying to explain what the issue is. you guys are so sure that you are a good ally, that you arent racist, that nothing you do is ever misogynoirist, yet you dont even realize that you dismiss or even silence black voices you dont like by villainizing every black fan who wants to talk about this and uplifting every black person who says the things you want to hear. to the point that a black user here can use the hard r and white people are trying to educate black people why that is okay or isnt okay. all while that person even apologized and had to tell you guys to not speak over black people in defense of them. do you not see that you are tokenizing the black voices you deem comfortable while ignoring every voice that asks for a little bit of accountability in your contribution to the horrid antiblackness on arcanetwt?

but, no, no, rest assured this doesnt just apply to the fans but to the character in question too after all there is a reason why meltwt/meljaytwt is so outspoken on this. it isnt about her partner being shipped w someone else, most of us dont even care for the ship, our issue is the constant attempt at erasing her from the relationship she was in and those are two completely different things even if you blatantly choose to look the other way and fabricate lies. mel medarda, despite always being spoken about as beautiful and complex and such a great character, so far even that people say they want her to leave jayce so they can have her for herself, has a very small following. she has less fics on ao3 than the others, barely any x reader ship despite so many people claiming to shipping themselves with her, she gets less solo art and even less w other people or her canonical ship. she is constantly being othered. just recently we had someone exclude her from group art and saying she was the teacher while her same aged peers were drawn as students. to many she simply doesnt exist and if you care about mel, if you actually do like her, if you seek out her content, this becomes abundantly clear real quick: mel does not exist as a main character to arcanetwt.

she is a side character to many of you. she is a side character like any other black women in fiction because you as fans were conditioned by young age to view black women as that. you are surrounded by the sassy black best friend, the angry black woman, the disposable black girlfriend who will always just be a temporary love interest, side character a and side character b - you grew up in a world where you view black women like that. that is why her fandom is so small. just like any other black female characters are small. no other main character gets this type of treatment other than her. and that her fandom is so small is just another indicator for that. and that it mostly consists of black fans is another indicator too because those very often are the only ones capable to see a black woman as a character in herself and not just a nice compliment in a sentence in between. this, too, is misogynoir btw and saying "well i just prefer this and this character" only works so many times before you gotta put the work in and question your racial bias and i am telling you YOU HAVE TO to OVERCOME that and i am telling you that because i too used to not care about black female characters.

i grew up in a very white society and was one of those kids who were trying to be as white as possible to cater to white ppl and i had to actively unlearn to ignore dark skinned women in any media and woah let me tell you once you do you realize there are so many beautiful characters to obsess over and so many new people to meet and it WILL change your view on a lot of things in fandom and it will make you AWARE and that is a good thing. you should be woke. being woke is a good thing no matter how many people say it isnt. its just nobody can do this for you but you yourself. you will see the mistreatment of fans and you will get angry about this and you will get uncomfortable too bc you might be nonblack you might even be white but that is just what it is and how its going to be and i appeal to you to be loud w us as well, to fight for a fandom space where white fans arent the only ones who get to enjoy sillies and whimsicals, where we can move and have fun w/o being confronted w unchallenged racism and people being too proud to work on their biases or even take any critcism, i beg you to not gaf about aesthetics and what you want your blog to look like and i beg you to not gaf about what your peers might think of you bc trust me you do not want to be the person belittling antiblackness for the sake of getting a few likes on an art piece where two people you like smooch.

this affects real black people even if arcanetwt wants to say we arent real or dont care about black issues. this is a black issue just like it'd be w any recreational activity

[mctreeleth]

I've been thinking about how back in like, 2003, I used to record, on VHS, episodes of Whose Line Is It Anyway off of the Comedy Channel on Austar, so that when the high school drama teacher was too hungover to teach, he could just put them on the TV for the year 8s, and how right now there's probably a 17 year old with a Dropout subscription fulfilling that same function but with episodes of Make Some Noise.

[moltengoldveins]

having. Thoughts.

[nabaath-areng]

im having the worst body day in a good while in terms of pain but i refuse to lay down. for there lies the road to the devil (mental health spiraling with nothing to distract from it). i SHOULD cook. but im not sure ill be able to with the pain. especially since the pain is because it feels like literally nothing is sticking together, like im much more bendy and hypermobile and useless than normal, which severely affects both motor skills and body strength. not to mention that this is causing a bad jaw day where so chewing is pain cause i already cant keep it in place and keep my mouth properly closed. i keep complaining but like, holy fuck i want off this illness ride

[lambofdawn]

I've taken some time to sit on this, and have decided to try and use this as a teaching moment - for you and for others who I've seen expressed this sentiment. Off the cuff, you reek of troll vibes, and you definitely seem like a sockpuppet for the unstableanginapectoris account - but I digress.

I understand the desire to fully involve yourself a situation that you have emotional stake in. You're obviously a fan of the slenderverse, and likely of the two people you've mentioned above. If I had to hazard a guess, you've formed an emotional connection (parasocial) with the people related to these series, and therefore feel slighted when they are outed. It may feel like an attack on yourself if you hyperfocus or identify these series as a large interest of your identity. I highly recommend you do some reading on the very thin line between healthy and unhealthy parasociality.

I want to tell you about some statistics. From domesticshelters.org (which directly sources this data):

An estimated 1.3 million women are victims of physical assault by an intimate partner each year. Source:Costs of Intimate Partner Violence Against Women in the United States. 2003. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, National Centers for Injury Prevention and Control, Atlanta, GA.

Historically, females have been most often victimized by someone they knew. Source: U.S. Department of Justice, Bureau of Justice Statistics, “Criminal Victimization, 2005,” September 2006.

Most cases of domestic violence are never reported to the police. Source: Frieze, I.H., Browne, A. (1989) Violence in Marriage. In L.E. Ohlin & M. H. Tonry, Family Violence. Chicago, IL: University of Chicago Press.

Among victims of intimate partner violence, 84% of female victims and 61% of male victims disclosed their victimization to someone, primarily a friend or family member. Only 21% of female victims and 6% of male victims disclosed their victimization to a doctor or nurse at some point in their lifetime. Source: National Intimate Partner and Sexual Violence Survey, 2010 Summary Report. National Center for Injury Prevention and Control, Division of Violence Prevention, Atlanta, GA, and Control of the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.

Almost one out of five or 16.3% of murder victims in the U.S. were killed by an intimate partner; women account for two out of three murder victims killed by an intimate partner.Source: Homicide Trends in the United States, 1980-2008. Nov., 2011. U.S. Department of Justice, Office of Justice Programs, Bureau of Justice Statistics.

From the National Sexual Violence Resource Center: Between 2% and 10% of allegations brought to police are falsified, but this number is highly inflated due to inconsistent protocols.

Survivors of abuse, especially AFAB survivors or women survivors in general, do not owe anyone their stories. Often when survivors do escape the abusive situation, speaking out against their abusers causes significant mental harm and increases the possibility of inviting further harm from their abusers, physical or otherwise. The people who speak about their experiences are extraordinarily brave, and statistically speaking are most likely telling the truth. I cannot speak for the others who spoke up against Rosner, but I know that my post was an attempt to warn others of behavior that had been happening behind closed doors for years. Since the posting of my original tweet, multiple other victims have come to me to share their stories and express that they thought they were "the only ones". Posts to warn the community serve to keep the community safe.

Neither Heather, nor myself, nor any other victims of Adam Rosner and Jeffrey Koval owe anyone the full details of our stories. I have many reasons for not going completely public - one of which is fear of retribution, which I know for a fact Jeff has threatened. You may feel entitled to answers because of your emotional closeness to the source material, but you do not know any of the people in these series, and you do not know the victims.

On a closing note, let me make something abundantly clear - fans do not mean anything to these kinds of people outside of your usefulness to them. If this is an attempt to catch their attention or get in their good graces, you will only succeed in positioning yourself to become another victim. Either by financially, emotionally, physically, or mentally supporting them to stroke their own egos. They do not care about you.

I want to make an appeal to the entire Slenderverse fandom. The fandom is sick and you are ready for this conversation. The fandom is sick not only because of the actors, but also because of the fans. Important note: I do NOT condone any violent actions on anyone's part, I just want to know the TRUTH and do not support either the madness of the fans or the inadequacy on the part of some actors. Also in this post, I will cover not only the situations with the actors of EMH and the Marble Hornets, but also the specific situations with Jeff Koval and Adam Rosner. We all remember how Brian was sexualized and threatened, how Tim was bullied, and how Evan was harassed and threatened. And this is just the tip of the iceberg, because in fact, many actors have been subjected to varying degrees of disgusting treatment from fans. Threats against the actors, death wishes not only for the actors, but also for their loved ones, insane harassment. And even if the fan frenzy has subsided at the moment, it's still there.

If we talk about the actors themselves, then when it comes to Jeff Koval, one logical question arises in my head: "why did they hush up what happened?"Jeff was an abuser and a manipulator and, of course, he is a vile person. The way Jeff treated his girlfriend and Evan is truly disgusting. And indeed, it seems to me very hypocritical and twofold how Adam was canceled, but Jeff was considered "not the same thing," and here's why: I conducted my own little investigation into Adam's situation and also looked at all the evidence here and I haven't found any convincing evidence that that he's a rapist, even though he's a really NASTY person. And before you start writing about how I justify him, let me explain my position: for me, Adam Rosner is an unpleasant, vile person with whom I would never want to have any personal contact, he certainly did and said a lot of disgusting things, but there is no evidence specifically that he's a rapist, and I'll explain why.

Now let's talk about my own little investigation into all the accusations that have been leveled against Adam Rosner. Personally, I consider him to be a vile person, but my goal is to find out the truth, not pin all mortal sins on him. So, let's see what I found out.:

Let's start with zoophilia. From what I saw, the "screenshots" come from only one person, there is no one else who could confirm them and say: "Yes, it really happened, I saw these messages from Adam not in screenshots.", or: "Yes, Adam personally told me about it." (with the real evidence base behind these statements). Usually, in such shocking situations, screenshots are taken not by one person, but by several. Also, the "screenshots" themselves don't look reliable, they look very strange. Regarding this, I share the same opinion as Ford Muybridge. If there is a real evidence base behind these screenshots and Adam Rosner mentioned somewhere else about his predilections for animals, then notify me about it, I will study the information and if it is reliable, I will edit and include it in the post.

The situation with Heather also looks extremely dubious. At least because based on how specifically the situations are described, the identity of this person will be quite understandable to those present at that party, as well as to Adam himself. And considering that literally the entire Internet is now on the side of Adam's victims, if this girl were a real victim, she would have no reason to maintain her own anonymity in wider circles either. There's nothing to be afraid of when you have so many people behind you, when you WILL DEFINITELY be supported, considering that other actors have turned their backs on Adam. I don't want to say that I don't believe the victims, I want to say that I consider it unwise to accuse without presenting evidence, at least because anyone who has at least some material or psychological benefit from this can say: "This man abused me." Please, kindly, if you are accusing someone of something, then show proof. Heather didn't attach anything to the post, even something trivial that would make it clear that she really knew Adam. And it's not necessary to reveal your identity to the readers of this post, it would be enough just to show some photos with Adam that are not publicly available. I can't believe that over the years of friendship, there can't be some personal photos or at least something that could confirm her personal acquaintance with Rosner. According to one of the commentators, under the full list of charges the actors from EMH have officially refuted Heather's words, but I personally have not yet verified this information and cannot say that this is true, however, I felt it necessary to indicate this here, as the commentators, who will also be like me, are not lazy to understand this, they may try to find more accurate information on this subject, and I will include it in the post if it is reliable.

About the situation with some screenshots and Adam's statements. His vile fetish for "little sisters" turned out to be really true, he confirmed this in his apology post, posted either in 2016 or in 2017 (I saw both dates and I do not know which one is correct). As well as some disgusting statements about some people. Well, to add to that, what's disgusting is disgusting, and I won't deny it. The only thing I would like to point out is that his apologies really look vague, without any evidence or specifics.

Regarding the situation with Ress. A shared selfie cannot be considered proof of a sexual relationship. But as for the screenshots, there are really big questions for Adam, however, there is still no direct mention of sexual contact, so I would like to see and know more, it's hard for me to draw unambiguous conclusions from hints and fragments, but I do not deny the possibility that Ress may be telling the truth, her words still sound more believable than Heather's words.

About Eve. Her story is more believable than other stories, given that the number of screenshots and photos is much greater than other people's. If the screenshots are not fake, then it turns out that Rosner was really in love with an underage teenager as an adult, which is certainly disgusting. But one thing is bothering me - why was Eva unhappy about being ignored with Adam Rosner's disregard? After all, if you think about it that way, then realizing his feelings, he tried to distance himself from her quite reasonably.

The situation regarding his phone call is ambiguous. In my opinion, two people are responsible for sexual intercourse. If a girl took birth control pills and knew exactly when to take them, as well as how much they work, then I have questions for her, because the pills she takes are her area of responsibility. Adam's area of responsibility is to inquire about the duration of the pills and read the instructions for them. In my opinion, they both behaved irresponsibly. In addition, she claimed that everything was fine when he was interested in both her condition and her financial situation (the situation in which she gave him the money). Agree, when a person constantly assures that everything is fine, but in fact it is not, then this is already his area of responsibility, since people around him cannot read minds. I am shocked that I have to explain such elementary things, given that the girl, as I understood from the phone call, had also inadvertently become pregnant before (starting at 08:20 in the recording of the phone call, the girl says that she had already become pregnant unplanned before not from Adam, correct me, if I was mistaken, English is not my native language). Given her previous unplanned pregnancy, wasn't it her area of responsibility not to have sex, realizing that her morning pill wasn't effective for the entire day? As for Adam's excuses, I don't like the way he tries to shift his part of the responsibility to the fact that he was young, as well as his phrase that he always regrets being in debt more than anything else in life, is really strange. My opinion is that they both behave like irresponsible and very impulsive people. I don't like Adam himself or the girl. My personal conclusion about the situation with Adam Rosner in general: of course, he is a disgusting and vile person and there is a high probability that he could REALLY be in love with an underage teenager, as well as have consensual sexual contact with a minor. However, it is just as likely that he is NOT a rapist or a zoophile. I think it is extremely wrong to pin all the sins of humanity on a person, let him be responsible for what he really did. And yes, this does NOT negate the fact that I find it disgusting that he fell in love with an underage girl, being an adult, it makes me sick, BUT he is not a monster, not a rapist, not a murderer.

Returning to Jeff Koval, I want to talk about the fact that the main claim against his manipulativeness and abuse is very similar to the claim against Adam, given that there is no real evidence that Adam Rosner committed violence (which does not negate his other vile actions, but we are now talking specifically about violence). And Jeff didn't do any better than Adam, not at all.

I am not calling for any cancellation or harassment of any of the actors or fans. I consider the "cancellation culture" to be a very ambiguous and in many ways destructive phenomenon, it's like how people stone a person, making him a scapegoat. The "cancellation culture" is disastrous due to the fact that it is lynching, and lynching is not always correct, it can spread a lot of false information. I don't want to say that the victims are "guilty" of anything, but seriously, do I have to explain why lynching is a bad thing? If we talk about people who turn out to be victims, then proving your words is important. Of course, one should not immediately blame someone who claims to be a victim, but I believe that the presumption of innocence SHOULD also be taken into account. Without proof, the world just turns into chaos. Indirect evidence may also not always be something that would really prove a person's guilt. The world is not black and white, please do not forget this and check the information PERSONALLY, use your critical thinking.

I would also like to discuss separately the topic of T12 cancellation in general. It seems very unwise to deny the importance of this project to the entire Slenderverse fandom. Of the main complaints about the plot from people who devalue T12's contribution to the fandom, only a couple of complaints turned out to be significant. Most people talk about things that are described and explained in Milo's journal. Correct me in the comments if this is not the case, but Milo's journal was written personally by Adam Rosner, therefore, this is canonical information. And I'm pretty sure that if this whole situation with Adam hadn't happened, the information from Milo's journal would have been included directly in the videos themselves. Read the journal and you will find that many plot holes are closed just by describing the events from there. Adam Rosner is a good screenwriter and creator, but a bad person. I also don't want to devalue his contribution to the Slenderverse fandom, although as a person and person he disgusts me.

I think I'll draw a general conclusion from all this and summarize it. I think that people in the Slenderverse fandom should reconsider their attitude to everything that is happening. Many actors no longer want to have anything to do with Slenderverse and Creepypasta, because fans have an extremely inappropriate tendency to treat actors as radically as possible, and there is definitely a problem with sexualization, bullying from series in the fandom, etc. It is inappropriate to wish someone dead, to find out where a stranger lives and threaten him. And yes, understand that lynching is not a good thing, and I'm surprised that I need to explain exactly why this is a bad thing. Check the information, ask for evidence, and stop trying to find scapegoats. Adam Rosner and Jeff Koval are really nasty and unpleasant personalities, but before accusing someone of all mortal sins, it's worth figuring out what's true and what's not. I would like the Slenderverse fandom to become better and less radical, as well as for people to engage in critical thinking before throwing serious accusations at anyone.

[transmechanicus]

I get a little indignant when i look up the lyrics for a song that has very straightforward and understandable meaning to anyone who has experienced a modicum of emotional pain in their life and there are websites like "Song Lyrics Explained" like ohhh some people have never had their heart broken I see.