#because i will get stuff wrong bc i am learning and shit and i consider myself fairly new not quite intermediate in political theory

[c1trvswurld]

Gonna reread the communist manifesto bc I remember reading it in middle school but I don't remember like much sticking to my feeble freshly out of primary school brain. So I'm hoping I can sit down an analyze this shit more thoroughly. Not bc I think I'm a communist (dunno where I stand tbh I just have basic common sense and humanity to guide me [though ig for where I live a lot of my thinking is very socialist heavy/left leaning aligned]) I just like political theory a lot for some reason. Even though it makes my head explode and gives me severe tremors, it's cool.

[nosolaceofastraightanswer]

okay so i jsut finished s1 (i know im so behind 😭😭😭😭) and started thinking about reggie and i have some thoughts ( im going to yap) so!!!!! return of:

TUAMRE24 ALGAMATION POST (real ones remember these from the summer of ‘23) FOR S1

i feel like a large fanon reputation for him is him being this completely evil asshole of a dad. and this is mostly unrefined bcs of the lack of canon material for the hargreeves’ childhood (i am yet to read young blood but i do have it, ill make a post). but i think a different reading would be more accurate to canon

in a way he kind of haunts the narrative of s1 up until plus contacting him, and even then he is so vague it’s hard to grasp a motive from him.

s2 and s3 kind of only bring more questions, which are more frustrating because in s3 so many things are revealed -and s2 has the alien reveal too- but this reginald is not the one that raised them.

so that original reginald, no matter how similar, continues to haunt the narrative (i hope im using this term correctly 🙏). he’s not the one they’re talking to, collaborating with, getting murdered by (luther ☹️) but he’s the influence behind not only their perceptions of the sparrow reggie but also everything they encounter considering he raised them and all

this bring us back to my thesis, i think a better reading of reggie (that a lot of people have touched on b4 me don’t get me wrong) is where he genuinely cares for the umbrellas in his own sort of way.

i mean, going back to s1 he obviously says that shit to klaus in the barbershop about potential, which probably points more to the marigolds thing than anything- but what i found interesting is when viktor was given the violin and there’s the whole flashback with abigail (?) and he seems to genuinely have some fondness for viktor learning the violin outside of just fulfilling his dead wife’s (?) wishes. (how did aliens get a violin? we’re they introduced to the earth by aliens in the first place? is reginald from the future? these are all questions i worry will not be answered in six episodes)

i think it’s interesting to take into account how aliens might have a different way of viewing love and affection. their culture and even biology might be so wildly different that humans and aliens are incompatible for connections. of course this is more speculation that anything else, but i feel like reginald’s alien status should be utilized more in the text because genuinely what the fuck is going on

this turned into a lot of different thoughts about reggie so i’m gonna make some smaller posts abt other s1 stuff

if anyone reading this hiiiii ☂️☂️☂️☂️☂️

[6kuros]

As a fellow creator who is also disturbed and upset by the revelation of pizza tower being a product of 4chan type people, I'm wondering how you handle it? I still want to draw fan art but Im struggling to not get uncomfortable. Basically, I have both love and hate for the game now, and you seem like a cool person so Im wondering how you deal with that. Love your pizza tower fan art sm btw!

im really glad that you enjoy my art, and also am flattered you think im cool!!!

first of all, id like to mention that the art i posted just now was art that i had finished last night, before everything about mcpig came to light and i just wanted to post it since i already had it done…still unsure if im going to draw consistent pizza tower in the future honestly, id like to because its a lot of fun and i really do love a lot about the game. ideally, the current situation would change somehow so i can do that without any discomfort for myself or others, but the only way i foresee that happening is if the devs actually remove the racist shit from the game

what makes me feel (kind of) okay about producing fanart for the game despite what emerged is mostly the fact that as long as i am not reproducing the harmful contents of the game, nor directly supporting the people behind it, im not putting any harm into the world or perpetuating the 4chan stuff i guess? the only thing im really worried about is possibly getting people to want to buy the game by putting my fanart out there, but considering the games popularity from streaming and youtube videos i dont see my own art as contributing to that much. that makes it easier for me not to feel unsettled when i draw fanart for it, but i think that depends on how you view the relationship between fanart and source material, especially in an interactive space like the internet. if you think your art risks sending the message that you approve of negative aspects of a piece of media then its probably better not to share that art

theres also the fact that from the messages that were revealed i get the impression that at some point mcpig had a sort of disdain for "cringe leftists" being fans of the game i guess, and i would consider myself someone who he would/would have found cringe at one point lol. so by being into the game its kind of a fuck you idc that you hate me, this thing you made is being enjoyed by cringe leftists. considering the tone of some of the messages was "if people get mad at me im just going to be edgy in response" i dont even think disengaging with the game would even bother him at all. but all of that is really just speculation and i dont want to insinuate that engaging with bigoted media is proactive just because you are a marginalized person or have progressive politics. its important to actually weigh the harm of your actions and what effect you have with your consumption of said media i dont really know if thats a good answer though, and if it holds up to any sort of moral judgement. i do think its possible to enjoy problematic media, but considering how new the game is its not the kind of thing i can look at and be like "this piece of media is from x years ago and doesnt do real harm now". my worst fear is that there are pizza tower fans who are going to see the awful shit in the game and replicate it, bc the game somehow makes them thinks theres nothing wrong with it or that they can do so without consequence. just from a scope of the fandom there seem to be a lot of young teenagers so Yeah. im concerned in that regard and id like to beam a message into kids' brains thats just like Hey this character design/behavior fucking sucks Dont do this

so, by posting my art anyway i hope i can contribute to a portion of the fanbase that is outwardly against the bigoted content in the game, as an alternative to mcpig dick riders/defenders. and if there are any fans out there involved in the community who dont know better, hopefully they can learn, and avoid perpetuating bigotry

all that being said, your feelings on the matter may be very different, and you dont have to abide to any of this thinking. if a piece of media is upsetting you, its okay to step away from it as long as you need. maybe see how you feel when you come back to it and if the hateful feelings are still there, there is no obligation to engage further

(and as a bottom line if anybody reading this is considering playing pizza tower i suggest you pirate it instead of paying for it)

[mind0invader]

Vent + rant

Why is life so stressful as a teenager,

my friends always hangout together I feel left out no matter what, I get jealous over my friends having another friend, I feel like I’m 6-10 years old again, I used to get bullied and my ‘best friend’ would bully me and so would my other classmates because I was ‘weird’ nobody liked me and I have been left out and people only wanted to group with me when it had something to do with art because I was very good at it but no matter what I always feel alone, I hate socialising, I hate my family, I don’t want my friends I don’t feel like I fit in, I think I’m autistic and tried to actually open up to my parents about my feelings for once and hey got mad at me for thinking I was autistic, I hate my parent, I hate my older sister, she never takes me serious and whenever she talks to me it’s only her who is allowed to talk whenever I try to talk to her shes like shut up I don’t have time for you, I’m also the middle child so I have been left out a lot by my siblings and my family is religious and Muslim but I don’t even believe in god because I don’t get how it works but I’m scared to tell them because I’m scared of getting abused and yelled at like I used to get, I still remember that time where my father smashed my head to my plate bc I didn’t know what he meant by fixing my posture when I was 5 or 6, it’s always stressful at school like last year it was fine and easy and suddenly everything I’m doing is wrong and hard and suddenly I wonder what would happen if I disappeared or committed suicide would people actually notice me or apologies, I rot in my room constantly bc I hate talking I feel like everything gets worse and that I’m no one’s favourite, I get nervous easily when talking in front of people. I love drawing a lot and I want to become a comic artist but seeing that I suck at doing colouring and line-art and others are better just makes me feel useless and stupid, I don’t wanna work or talk to anyone I just wanna do my own thing and do what I want, I don’t wanna be a hijabi, I don’t like wearing it and I don’t want to but my older brother is pressing me into wearing it he keeps asking me why I won’t, I just don’t like wearing it, I don’t wanna cover my hair, I use my hair to calm down at stressful situations, I wanna get away from my family, I wanna call the cops, I just wanna die, I’m just a child and my parents don’t realise that, my mom presses me to learn subjects at home when it’s not even homework, its MY free time and it’s precious to me I don’t wanna waste it on that til I actually need it, I keep getting stress from everything, I feel like I get judged or no one will ever love me, I just wanna be a normal girl but I can’t, I feel like I’m already mature and my parents are always like why are you so serious and so does my sister think that I am overreacting when SHE is the one always trying to get me to do everything she tells me to like I’m a slave like I’m just your little sister like who the fuck do you think you are, I hate how my father yelled and abused me before but I don’t get hit since I don’t yell back and I just do what he says but I truly hate my family because of how they are acting my mom used to be normal I used to love her but since she got stress from that education she was trying to get, she is just another person, I wanna scream and yell so bad but I just can’t, I feel like throwing up whenever I cry, I am emotional and my sister always says some shit to me and laughs it off and tries to show me some stuff like nothing happened, I don’t forget everything that she pushes away I don’t forget whenever my parent act like they didn’t do anything wrong, I observe and hear a lot and understand how some people are and what type they are.

Why has my childhood always been so shit, why am I considered weird? Why can’t I just have a normal life with stress? Why is it that I am not allowed to sleep if the kitchen is not clean I’m not the one eating and dirtying everything like a pig, my parents are unfair when it comes to me and my siblings, I’m a girl so I have to clean everything, im not allowed to be on my phone before the kitchen is clean I have to help with everything, I have 2 other brothers that are old enough to clean and cook but my older brother always gets me to do stuff and tells me I can’t wear pants and T-shirt that’s for females, GIVE ME A BREAK, WHY IS LIFE TREATING ME THIS WAY, THERE IS A REASON WHY I DONT BELIVE IN GOD ANYMORE, why can’t life just give me a break, I just wished I was somewhere else maybe like in anime or just somewhere away from this, I hope I die soon somehow. I hate being a girl, I wished I was born a male not trans but born and treated like one because they have an easier life because WDYM I have to go through pain every month bc I’m not pregnant I’m just a 14 year old.

I also know this is idiotic to post

[clonerightsagenda]

me finishing Station 11: losing fluids at an alarming rate bc I was sobbing my eyes out me finishing Lockwood & Co: losing fluids at an alarming rate bc I caught my annual start of school year cold and am now sucking down Liquid IV with a deadpan expression while watching Lucy and Lockwood work-break up. again

Anyway episode 10

Tbh I feel like I am watching an AU angst fanfic where the writer fudged the characterization to do more pre-relationship arguments.

Is Joplin wearing one of the silver capes? Or just a silver net seal over her shoulders gesturing at the same idea?

George does all the fucking inventory and restocking??? Give this man a raise he's also cooking for all of them

Yknow considering ghosts can manifest right after a murder (see: that guy from the furnaces in the fourth book) bold of these adults to try to kill a bunch of kids after dark. Even if they win, for round 2 they wouldn't be able to see them coming.

"He always mentions adults. He didn't know it's young people who could see beyond the veil." Ok so if the skull isn't the child servant who helped him deal with ghosts, who on earth is he? I suppose if they aged everyone up 3 or so years he'd be like 20

me googling 'scrubber British slang': ah I learned a new slur. Tbh the way things were going with their Female Character TM shit I figured we would not get out of this without someone calling her a slut

Lockwood siccing a bunch of freshly released ghosts on people: I call this the Lucy Carlyle fastball special

I was wondering if they were going to imply Gale was the one who arranged his parents' accident, since he's Marissa's hired killer. Also after all the dramatic sword fights I admit I did snicker when he just pulled out a fucking gun. Why did no one do that sooner

After the whole thing about George being the overlooked third wheel they took away the bit where he cons everyone by faking his death because no one bothered to notice he'd lost his glasses lenses? Bro I'm so sorry you got upstaged by a fucking… laser beam for some reason

"Something's wrong, they're trapped" foreshadowing again although in the books he already knew that. Dude did you not phone home once in the last 50 years

Joplin exploded. I guess. Why not at this point

The second half of this show has gone wildly off the rails and I'm honestly not sure why they made any of these choices. Like they're not objectively bad or anything but what was wrong with the original sequence of events.

They left out the skull calling for his master and getting snubbed which I feel like was pretty significant but they left almost all his other stuff out too so. Rip again skull in a jar, they cut all your best lines, none of which sounded like anything a kid from the 1860s would say. He would've loved the Mercymorn speech

Oh thank god they at least kept Kipps' gifted kid burnout speech.

Dropping villain!Penelope way earlier I see

Listen if they're making everything darker and edgier I hope he really DOES have his sister's ghost locked in there

[mithliya]

Hi there, am I remembering correctly that you made a post something along the lines of if you hadn't been raped you wouldn't have had a boyfriend? Something like that. I think about that post often because as soon as I read that it reminded me the first time I had sex with a guy. I remember the first time I did anything sexual with this guy it was mostly forced/coerced (I was young, fifteen) and I didn't really understand what was going on. I couldn't recognize that I was uncomfortable or didn't want to do it. About a month later I told him we should just try to have sex. Before this I hated all the sexual stuff we did, I wasn't attracted to him at all, and when I said that I remember thinking two things: the first was that maybe sex would cure my body of being unresponsive to him (I was never turned on, practically the opposite) and that I would become attracted to him and the second that I'd already been raped before (csa) so what is the difference? I remember thinking that it didn't really matter what happened to my body and that all that mattered was that I could grow to be attracted to and fall in love with this guy. I think that if I had never been raped I never would have done any of it. I was also very depressed at the time. But I remember very specifically thinking about how I'd already had a dick in me so what did it matter? Sorry for being vulgar and sending this heavy ask, but it's weird to think about. It feels like a nightmare of another life. I also can't help but feel like a bad lesbian, especially when I see hard-core gold stars shitting on lesbians who've had sex with a male. I'm not looking for validation. Like, I know I've never been attracted to a guy in my life and have never had an urge to have sex with them or have yearned for them, so if someone calls me a bisexual I don't care because I know it's not true. But I rarely see lesbians with an experience similar to mine, so a lot of the time I feel isolated. I also haven't told anyone about this.

yeah a lot of what u said sounds a lot like what i went through. i went through a long time of being pressured and coerced and having my boundaries violated where i ended up thinking that there’s no point to my boundaries, that if i say no then i’m just going to be raped again anyways and i don’t want that. i also had the exact same belief of “well im already no longer a virgin so what’s the point?” which i think was my feelings of shame in a way. like i felt like i already failed at protecting my virginity and that it was my fault and that my value lessened, that i was a “whore” as a result and therefore should just go along with whatever a guy wants. i didn’t even consider “well, i don’t want to” as a valid reason.. it seemed dumb to say no. and i also had the same mindset of “if i let this happen enough times, eventually i’ll learn to like it” which in hindsight just seemed like me trying to change my sexuality through conditioning.. ofc my feelings never changed , i just got further traumatised and felt hopeless bc i didn’t know what was wrong with me and i just kept finding excuses for it until the answer became too blatant to ignore.

when you experience rape at a young age, i feel like u just feel like u have no right to boundaries anymore and u reach this state of learned helplessness. at least that’s how it was for me. it was like, there’s no way out, so why not try to make myself like it? why not try to embrace it? maybe if i try hard enough, i’ll end up liking it.

but yeah my life would’ve turned out very differently had i not been raped to begin with. that “boyfriend” literally had 0 chance with me and tried to get with me desperately for years, i was literally repulsed by him so i know my feelings didn’t change, i know i never felt any sort of interest in him. but my boundaries did change bc my mindset was really messed up. i wish i could go back in time and just tell baby me that being raped doesn’t mean i don’t deserve boundaries, it doesn’t mean that not saying no will make it any better for me, it doesn’t mean that i should put myself thru that stuff hoping it would somehow fix me.

and yeah it can feel quite isolating & honestly it’s quite triggering overall. i don’t want to think of a point in my life where i was constantly crying in the dark in my room, isolated, alone, felt trapped, felt like saying no is pointless, etc and it’s frustrating that people think it’s appropriate to constantly remind me of that time by bringing up one of the factors contributing to my trauma & suicidal tendencies. they can think im bisexual if they want but i wish they’d stop using my trauma to argue that. but ur not alone, there’s several lesbians ive talked to (all victims of CSA btw) who also have very similar stories. i really think it’s the combination of being so young mixed in with being raped & being a lesbian, & there being a guy who wants to take advantage of those vulnerabilities.

[bigmack2go]

No i dont think u understand!! I love heartstopper with my heart and all and im greatfull for all the representation but theres just so much i will never see myself in tv or media.

I want to see a kid having two(+) crushes and despair bc „why do i have to choose?“

But instead of the kid chOoSiNg ThE BeTtEr PeRsON iN tHe eNd i want to see them end up with BOTH because you dont have to choose! You can love several people in a romantic way and theres NOTHING wrong with it!

I want to see a girl that doesnt get along with other girls or a boy that doesnt get along with boys( or just isnt the same as other boys/girls)

I want to see a kid that just doesn’t belong to either. I dont wanna hear „not boy enough for the girls and not girl enough for the boys“ and have them struggle with the other people. NO! I want them to wonder for themselves who they are! Have them realize they dont belong to both or to either BUT TO NEITHER!

I want to see an outcast that isn’t all „boys at school never look at me. Im just not a main character…“ give me a kid thats an outcast but „WHY??? WHY AM I AN OUTCAST?? IM NOT EVEN THAT BAD WHY CANT NO ONE SEE THAT???“

Give me an authistic kid that doesn’t realize its being picked on until its to late. I want to see then masking and learning to unmask! I dont want to see not because „what is your problem?“ but because What is my problem? I want to see them struggling to name their feelings and even understand themselves! I want them to have to explain themselves and their actions but not being able too because THEY DONT KNOW EITHER!! I want them to be told their not authistic because „if you were authistic [insert authitic stty]“ i want them to accept that they have a disability and learn to live with it, not to say „aUthIsM iS A GiFt“ because for it fuking isnt! Its a condition! But that doesn’t make you less worthy of anything.

I want a kid that gets made fun off and KNOWS it but they cant do anything about it because the bullying is so passive that everyone’s just like „hAvE YoU eVeR cOnsIdeReD tHeyRe NoT aCtuAlLly AgaInSt YoU?” And being told to just engage with them, but of they do that then everyone will know theyre a fool and they fell for the passiveness and „did u actually think we wanted to be your friends ha ha“

I want an adhd kid that wonders „what is wrong with me?“ „why me???“ or „why cant i just be like everyone else“ i want them to struggle with asignments and get burned out and shit! I wanna see them nit asking for help because „istg if one more person asks me what dont you understand im gonna lose it!“ because „HOW AM I SUPOSED TO KNOW WHAT I DONT UNDERSTAND IF I DONT UNDERSTAND IT?!“ i want to see them react negatively when they meet another kid with adhd thats like them instead of „i fInNaLy FoUnd SoMeoNe ThAt UndErStAnDs mE“ because

„THAT WAS THE ONE THING THAT WAS GOOD ABOUT THIS WHOLE STUFF! I COULD NEVER FIT IN AND THE ONLY THING GOOD ABOUT IT WAS THAT I WAS UNIQUE! AND NOW I DONT EVEN GET TO HAVE THAT ANYMORE“

I want a kid that is of faith but not the same faith that they were raised with.

I want to see a christian kid thats friends with a muslim kid,because w h a t d o i c a r e? Maybe one of us is wrong. Maybe were both wrong. Maybe were both right! There is quite literally no way to find out!

I want to see them both struggle because the musilm kid hears shit like

„you realise that r the same ppl that k!ll3d ourlikes back in the day..“ (but why r they so nice then?) from one side, and „blah blah are you/ your parents terrorist(s)?“ (where’d u get that idea from) from the other

And the other kid hears „you cant be friends with a blasphemer“ and „you realise that everything you stand for is homophobic and what not“

Even better; give me a GAY christian that goes to church on Sundays and to pride on Fridays!

Give me an abuse surviver that was emotionally manipulated. Someone who thought that was normal. Some one who’s been lied to. Someone who has to change their whole worldview because everything they believed to be fact wasn’t. I want to see them growing into the person that did that to them in the first place BUT AGAINST THEIR WILL! I want them to fight against it! I want them to struggle because they don’t wanna hurt anyone but they know they’re toxic. Not in a „im just a burdain anyways i should go kms“ way but in a genuine way where they do genuinely bad things sometimes without realising it. But they can win that fight and the y D O N T have to become the abuser.

Give me an emotionally traumatised kid. A kid that keeps apologising and that panics when things go to good!

I want to hear the story of a bullying victim that changes school and it actually gets better and they panic about it.

I want them to genuinely believe their new friendgroup secretly has a groupchat without them. I want them to genuinely think people are laughing AT THEM when they r laughing in private. I want them to genuinely believe that no one gets it. I want them to genuinely think certain people dont want to do with them and r just being polite every here and there because „they r so cool! There is no possible way they would actually wanna be friends w me“

I want everything in they’re life to grow to be better but they just dont. They just watch their life improving while they dont heal. The damage is done, the glue is dryed. You cant do anything about it anymore. Its to late.

They genuinely think they cant heal anymore

A gifted kid that struggles more than everyone else and „they must have switched something up! Theres no possible way that my iq is barely 10 under einsteins.“ because they keep struggling.

Gimme a dyslexic kid that doesn’t go „why do i not get this“ but instead „why does everyone else get this??“

Give me a discalculatic kid for whom its the other way around! I don’t wanna see the same thing that every kid has with maths like „dO yOu GuYs ActUaLlY UndErStAnd ThIs??“ no! (They dont prolly but thats just normal) they go „how come i dont understand this when everyone else seems to do it somehow“

A kid with generalized anxiety disorder being misjudged as paranoid. A kid that panics because of the most obscure things. „What if a metheor destroys earth“

If your feeling funny connect it with ocd!

„What if everyone in my family is zombies? I cant just ask them that because if i do they know their cover is up and then they dont have a reason to not do zombie stuff anymore“

(I actually genuinely believed that for three years straight and i had so many panic attacks.)

I dont want then to not ask for help because „thats stupid lol! Everyone will think im a dumb kid woth too much fantasy“ but instead „if i ask for help IT’LL GET WORSE!“

A boy that has everything!

His parents have much money, he’s white (dont experience racism), he’s straight (no homophobia), cis, a boy, has friends, nothing stressful in his life „so why do i feel so damn bad?!“

A kid that digs into their past and theyre grandparents and stuff and find something they just didnt wanna know!

This is the representation i need! I need to see the other representation too but it’s not done with that!

There is so much more that kids think they will never see themselves in when watching tv etc. and they WILL grow to belive that they are wrong or not normal for that if that doesn’t change!

I could go on abt this and maybe i will tbh but in the coments lol

(I didnt do anything abt racism because im a white person and i dont experience it! I dont think i should talk about stuff that i dont know about as much as someone who IS experiencing it does)

[ipoddymouth]

Wait bestie I want to know your thots on the matty healy being problematic thing he’s said a lot of weird/offensive stuff for sure but apparently some of that stuff is supposed to be satirical/ he’s an edge lord or whatever like the n*zi salute thing he did and it’s not a good thing to do no matter the context but I feel like it’s probably more harmful to call him a n*zi when he isn’t actually one it’s probably better to call that action antisemitic than a whole n*zi no?

wait gjargigjag you just basically summarized my thoughts but imma ramble more under the cut

i dont think matty is actually, truly, deep in his core racist or a n*zi (i'm also p sure he's given enough interviews explaining himself and his political ideologies bc he's annoying and never shuts the fuck up) BUT he also does say a bunch of shit on the side that doesn't help his case.

i think intent is a big issue in society in general bc it's like 'are you saying this shit to be funny? or are you saying this shit to be mean?' and people don't ask that question anymore. i remember when ariana dated pete and he made that joke about manchester and people were like 'he's disrespecting the dead!!' and, like, i can defs see where people are coming from for sure, and i can also see why he was like ???? in response to the backlash because his attention clearly wasnt to offend.

i will not lie and will fully admit that i am SENSITIVE lmao and there are some jokes in standup sets that i will straight up 😐 during bc i cannot separate the words from intent sometimes but im not going to say bill burr is a rape apologist or whatever because i sit and watch my silly lil 'offensive' robot chicken episodes without batting an eye. the problem with humor is that there will always be a faction that makes certain people uncomfortable. and that's okay!!!! not all of us (me included) need to watch cumtown or red scare because we will not find it funny!!! there's one drag queen who's yt videos my boyfriend cant watch bc he thinks she comes across mean even though i think the jokes hit!!!!

and to your second point i agreeeee like im black and grew up in a p white area so obviously people have said some SHIT to me, but that means you have to learn how to distinguish between someone being intentionally racist or someone being ignorant. i think matty says shit he thinks is funny because he's trying to be funny but the jokes themselves don't hit and just come across as....bizarre? rude??? multiple -ists???? but then he tries to explain himself and people (strangers to him) are either like 'fuck u this isnt sincere' or are just like 'but youre still wrong and horrible' and he just gets frustrated and deletes his socials in a lil baby fit gjlragjaglgj. and not to be a white apologist lmao BUT i kinda do understand why people turn to that 'anti-woke ideology' bc if every time i said something with poor phrasing and someone i didn't know called me a racist n*zi i'd probs go ape shit too.

there are real, actual n*zis like in real life who are actually trying to hurt people and people are pulling out all of their big gun ultra-bad labels for some scrawny boy band dude???? like what are we supposed to call the actual n*zis???????? like i l i t e r a l l y have seen a neo-n*zi rally down the street from my HOUSE and thats fucking TERRIFYING and they're just snatching up more people because of all of the culture wars bullshit

[but like to note im not saying that people need to be forgiving and understanding every time someone says something that pisses them off. some people need to be yelled at!!! they need to know they are wrong!!!! people should just be aware of the impact their words have. matty's words have made A LOT of people straight up hate him, but at the same time, some people have probably seen matty get called a n*zi and are now like 👀 bc the bar to being considered h*tler seems kinda low.]

anyway tl;dr racism is a spectrum, words have meaning, and we don't know these people. but if matty really is a racist and im wrong then i hope he chokes!!!

ALSO i am an adult and am not in the business of defending other adults so like im not gonna argue with someone if they think matty is racist. i am not doing dirty hit pr for FREE

[alyimoss]

Your big sad kitten eyes have compelled me but I also suck at prompting stuff,,, Give me your random-est UTMV info, I am curious!!!

theres kind of a lot so im putting it under the cut

ok so i dont have much for canon info, except ig that dream is canonically demiromantic asexual? which i dont see talked abt much but is incredibly important to me

but headcanon info?? i got plenty of that shit. which. i conveniently cant think of much of rn but its!! fine!!

ok starting out is one that i wont elaborate too much specifically bc i wanted to make a full post abt it at some point but. i think underlust sans is in the star sanses. no question. why? because i like him and i like the stars and i like him in the stars. end of story. period. fine. theres more i could say but, again, full post at a later date.

next thing also has to do with the stars as well as the bad sanses and its. look. yeah, theres serious shit abt them. theyre supposed to be kinda serious as the protectors of aus and their conflicts can have devastating effects on their surroundings. and the bad sanses are literally a gaggle of murderers who are not okay by any metrics. theres serious stuff to be said and had with them, yes. however, i cannot take those motherfuckers seriously. any of them. and considering theyre different versions of sans undertale, mr crack shitty jokes with a mass murderer, i think thats a fine sentiment.

anyway they all hang out. they fight and they hate each other and they hurt each other gravely and need days to weeks to months to heal properly and they fucking hang out with each other. i think ink was the first to kinda. "reach out" in a way, because he sees absolutely nothing wrong in fraternizing with the enemy. he'd just pop in and bother them because he was bored and had nothing else to do. i think killer was more or less fine with this (most of the time, anyway) but the others werent exactly enthused. anyway they had to kinda grow used to him.

and then ink dragged dream with him and i think dream is also more or less ok with the idea of visiting the enemy because he wants to help them leave nm's side and lead better lives that dont have to revolve around uh. killing. and making everything worse not only for others but themselves as well. and the btt i think were more ok with dream than ink because of his positive aura — hes just nice to be around, and even if most of them dont think they deserve good things and good treatment, they cant help but be drawn to him. i gotta imagine beiong around him after living with nm is like being offered a heated blanket after days out in the cold. theyre drawn to the warmth almost instinctually, their bodies craving it so bad their minds dont have the time to deny them. anyway yeah dream hangs out with them.

blue and lust are understandably more hesitant, not only because they're more in tune with the concept of "hey those guys are our enemies should we really be getting that close to them", but also because, as mortals, they have a lot more to fear should someone not want them there. i think the bad sanses initiate this time bc theyre curious. and blue and lust agree tentatively.

yeah all that to say they hang. often. they'll fight and then like 20 minutes later theyre in ccino's or smthn talking abt their day. they mostly hang in different aus, but sometimes they choose nm's castle as their meeting spot just because. and every time theyre chased out and/or nearly killed by nm himself. and they never learn their lesson and just come back like a week later.

and bc im a sucker for the trope of "hero and villain's fights have become so routine to both of them that they just talk about the most mundane shit during them", they do that too. its like-

*dodges bone attack* "oh btw you left your jacket at our place last time"

*knocks opposing balster out of the air, charges a retaliation attack* "oh shit, i was wondering where that was"

"yeah nm kinda found it first tho…" *hisses in pain as he fails to dogde the attack* "i can return the shredded junk tho if you want?"

*teleports out of range only to be grabbed by blue magic and thrown and pinned against the wall* "yeah why not. ccino's?"

"ccino's"

and this PISSES NM THE FUCK OFF. and honestly i cannot blame him.

because imagine getting together a squad of guys with a main goal of killing your brother, and instead of seriously trying to do that and feeding him more negativity via their hatred of the other side, they just. fucking hang out with them?? they banter and he can feel that they feel happier and safer with them??? what the FUCK. id be pissed.

he definitely tries to put a stop to this via several methods, such as punishment and correction and just getting entirely new guys. but it just ends up all the same no matter what, and at some point he gives up. at least theyre still fighting. even if they do bring the enemy over to the castle to watch adam sandler movies every saturday.

and also speaking of giving up, the hanging out doesnt generally extend to nm EXCEPT when its ink. bc i think theyre funny silly together. ink just bothers him and has for like. forever. and nm can never get rid of him or prevent him from following him, plus he supposes ink is something like an ally sometimes?? he doesnt like him (totally), but he tolerates him. because theres nothing else he can do.

and also speaking of nm i think corrupted and passive are separate entities sharing the same body. corrupted is the one in control, and passive just exists off to the side, offering his opinions or whatever. he cant really do much (he can sometimes control the body, but its very brief before corrupted takes control back because hes stronger), but he refuses to leave. so he just bothers corrupted. bc i think corrupted is someone who does not want to see anything resembling good in homself — he is the embodiment of evil, and that means he cant care about anyone, he cant feel anything like love or longing or pity or compassion. he's just here to soak up the negativity and submerge the world in it as well. nothing else. someone who refuses to acknowledge the everpresense of balance and how it pervades his own self as well. and thats something that passive LOVES bringing up because nothing sets corrupted off quite as well. one day he'll maybe realize that he is more than his own perception of "the embodiment of evil" and maybe that will allow passive to have more control over the body he once called his. or maybe not. an ee way.

i cant think of anything else rn lol. i think thisll be enough for now tho

[lastoneout]

Stealing this screencap from another post sorry but this here??

This is recycled biphobia. Word for fucking word. Right out of the lesbian separatist movement of the 70s. I have read the history on this and back in the day the talking point was(and still is in some biphobic sapphic spaces) "wanting to BE WITH men is not a politically or socially neutral choice". This is why bi women were kicked out of lesbian spaces around when the trans women got thrown out. Because us being available to men made us tainted, made us traitors, because if we REALLY cared about women's rights and feminism we would forsake our connections with men, but we don't, we choose to be with them or be "available" to them(which...don't even get me started) and that makes us unwelcome. We then were written out of and denied access to decades of our history and culture. To this day I see people acting like bi women can't use butch/femme even though those were our fucking words too, and the only reason we can't touch them now is because of our perceived proximity/availability to men. Because that makes us lesser. Because we can "pass" as straight and that means we aren't queer enough so we should shut up and stop bothering the nice gay women who don't have the luxury of passing as straight/being with men.

I am just like, a little shocked at how blatantly the biphobia is getting recycled here?? I felt weird speaking up bcs this is a trans-centric discussion and I don't consider myself trans, but I am a bisexual woman who is probably butch and I lived through monosexual discourse(and ace/aro discourse and transmed discourse and bi lesbian discourse and and and-) and have put up with people denying that I am really queer bcs I pass as straight and I just cannot sit here while they shit gets a fresh coat of paint slapped on it and wheeled back out to be used against a different group of people supposedly tainted by their proximity to maleness.

And this is why I have been vocal, FOR YEARS NOW, begging people to actually get into the weeds of the radfem to terf pipeline because it is so much more than just hating trans women and it always has been. Yes, trans women are a huge target and we should talk about that, we really REALLY need to talk about that, but we also need to talk about how they hate ALL trans and nonbinary people, the rampant biphobia in radfem spaces, how ace/aro discourse and transmedicalism were used as recruiting tools, how radfems and terfs pray on a general distrust of men and use it to indoctrinate SA victims by insisting all of their worst, trauma-informed fears about the world are true, how "men suck but women are awesome" jokes are basically a fucking radfem dogwhistle at this point and the REAL HARM they do to bi+ people and queer men of all stripes, how it's not fucking wrong to acknowledge the ways the patriarchy hurts men(cis and trans) too, all of this stuff is really fucking important and the fact that we have been so quick to water all TERF discourse down to "just hating trans women" has just helped their rhetoric spread, bcs now no one fucking recognizes it unless it's coming out with the transphobia front and center WHICH IT USUALLY DOESN'T.

I'm sorry this is so rambly and I've been trying to step away from queer discourse but these last couple of years I have been witnessing one hell of a massive feminism backslide from where we were when I was learning about it and like, it's fucking infuriating enough coming from cishetallo people, I can't stand seeing it come from queer people. I literally see people say with their whole chests that "the terfs in the 70s only hated trans women they didn't target anyone else" and then turn around and SAY THE SAME SHIT THOSE EARLY TERFS SAID ABOUT BI WOMEN ABOUT TRANS MEN word for word without a fucking ounce of self-awareness.

I don't even know what to do from here. I'm just so tired.

sorry I'm still reeling from that tweet thread like "trans men and nonbinary people are just collateral damage, trans women are the real targets" is really giving "bi+ people don't ACTUALLY experience unique bigotry for being bi, it's just misdirected homophobia" but like 8000% worse somehow

[sevmch]

hq boys as dads calling you while you're away bc your child wouldn't stop crying

characters: kuroo tetsuro, bokuto koutarou

warning(s): none, just fluff. kuroo is v father material aahh!!

a/n: this was sitting on my drafts for a while now. other characters coming soon 👀

kuroo tetsuro

you were overseas for two days to attend a convention that your job required which meant leaving kuroo and your child

kuroo was admittedly and without a doubt, a really good father so when he told you not to worry about them, you left without any worries at all

kuroo knew everything - how to prepare milk and baby food, changing diapers, how to get them to sleep, how to stop their tantrums, basically everything

still you bugged him all the way to the airport to call if something were to happen or if he needed help with anything such as locating the diaper and milk powder

afterall, he was rarely on baby duty since his job required more of his time compared to yours but he has never failed to provide you and his son the time and affection

the first day went by smoothly and without a problem, that is until the next day. your son just wouldn't stop crying so he had to call you to calm him down

no matter what kuroo did, your son just wouldn't stop crying even when he was cradling him gently in his arms and rubbing his back. their child has been crying for almost an hour now, only getting louder and stronger despite his best efforts to calmly shush him or lull him to sleep.

the morning went by pretty fine; kuroo fed, bathed, and played with their son - even changed the diapers twice. their son seemed to be in a pretty good mood throughout the morning but apparently, babies get mood swings too, and that's when the crying started.

kuroo tried basically everything from trying to get their son to drink milk, to giving the pacifier, and humming baby songs he could think of but all his attempts failed. their son wasn't bored nor hungry and was definitely not sleepy so it was starting to worry kuroo.

"hey bud, you're scaring me now," kuroo cooed, softly pressing the back of his hand against their son's forehead but the temperature was fine. kuroo knew all the baby stuff without sweat, even the signals of what they needed but this was entirely different. it was only when then their son pointed to the picture of the three of you framed on the wall that kuroo got his answer. pressing a soft kiss against his son's temple, he whispered softly, "i know bud, i miss mommy too."

kuroo grabbed his phone from the couch and called you, chuckling when you instantly answered on the first ring with a hint of worry in your voice. "tetsu, what's wrong? are you both okay? should i get on the next flight?"

"relax kitten, we're fine. we just miss you."

"awe, i miss both my boys too."

"mama's on the phone bud." kuroo switched to loud speaker, smiling widely at their son who looked at him with wide, doe eyes upon hearing your voice. the crying eventually died down as you kept speaking through the phone with your cute, tiny baby voice until your son fell asleep in his arms.

"is he asleep?" you asked.

"yep. hey, you should use that baby voice often. it's cute," he teased, grinning ear to ear.

"shut up."

the rest of the afternoon was spent at a mall near the airport, buying toys and new clothes and stopping by for ice cream before waiting for you at the terminal.

"look bud, there's mommy!" kuroo crouched to level with their son, pointing at your figure from a distance. their son's eyes lit up when spotting you, giggling and reaching out his other hand that kuroo wasn't holding.

"awe, it's my two favorite boys! i missed you both so much!" you said sweetly, dropping your bags to hug your son.

"i missed you so much, love." you hugged kuroo tightly when he stood up only for him to hug you tighter, peppering kisses on your cheeks.

"missed you more, kitten," he said softly, pressing a light kiss to your lips before carrying your son. you really had nothing to worry about.

bokuto kotarou

you were a little bit worried about leaving bokuto and your child even if it was just for a couple of hours. you had to visit your parents in kyoto and dropby for groceries on the way home

it's not that you didn't trust him, you were just not quite sure if the house would be exactly the same as when you left knowing how bokuto and your child loved to play A LOT

you considered calling akaashi to babysit the two lmao

bokuto matched your child's energy so while you're incharge of all the serious baby duties, bokuto was incharge of playing and goofing around with your child while you rested

really, your child got their hyperactiveness from bo

you were also the one who dealt with the tantrums while bo assisted, so when bo was left to deal with your son's tantrum alone, he panicked and was about to cry himself because your son was crying and it made him sad :(

you left the house around 6 am after preparing breakfast for your husband and son as well as the other things that bokuto will need for the day. althought bokuto spent a lot of time with your child, it didn't always include the serious baby duties so you knew for sure if you hadn't displayed the diapers and vitamins on the counter in advance, he'd be flipping the house upside down searching for them.

you also left a note on the fridge that consisted of all the instructions and reminders to serve as a guide. you trusted bokuto, of course, but you really just didn't want to come home to a mess.

bokuto's arms snaked around your waist and squeezed you lightly in his hug, nuzzling his face at the crook of your neck. "can't you just take us with you?"

"i'd love to kou, but our son just recovered from a fever so it's best if he stays home for now."

he nodded, visibly frowning. you cupped his cheek to get him to look at you. "kou, baby, i'll be back before you know it."

bokuto pouted, looking at you with puppy dog eyes and it took everything in you not to cancel your plans. "call me if there's a problem, okay?" you kissed him goodbye and left.

with the note you left him, bokuto had no troubles throughout the morning routine even during bathtime. he would send you pictures and videos from time to time so you wouldn't have to worry, also because he loved sharing things with you.

bokuto loved playing with your son, loved seeing the adorable smile and hearing the soft giggles during their playtime even if it meant having to crawl on the carpet with his son on his back like a horse.

bokuto was filming him walking around with a huge smile on his face, "come to dada, little guy." your son just recently learned how to walk on their own so their steps were still unstable and wobbly and this resulted to your son tripping on his own feet.

bokuto could shit his pants right now, quickly fumbling to his now crying son to comfort him.

"hey little guy, it's okay you're good, dada's here now." he's whispering comforting words while gently rubbing on their back but the cries only got worse, the tears streaming down the little guy's face nonstop and this made bokuto's heart sink, feeling his own tears pool in his eyes. "shh i'm sorry, i'm sorry... you're okay, i gotchu."

his hands hesitantly reached out hug your son, so fragile it scared bokuto. he was calling you now and thank god you answered right away.

"kou?"

"he won't stop crying and i don't know what to do, can you come home now please? i think i just made our son hate me."

you sighed, "he doesn't hate you, kou. can you tell me what happened?"

"i was taking a video of him while he walked around but then he tripped and i swear i was watching over him! he won't stop crying, oh god i'm gonna cry too."

"did he hit his head? is he seriously hurt anywhere?"

"no," bokuto mumbled and you sighed in relief.

"okay that's good. it'll be fine babe, kids fall sometimes, okay? especially at this stage where they're learning how to walk. just carry him around for a while and he'll eventually ca-"

"what if i drop him?! should i ask akaashi to come over??" he pressed the phone between his ear and shoulder, gently and carefully lifting his son from the ground, pressing him close to his chest despite being nervous.

"you won't drop him kou, i'll punch you if you do, and no, do not call keiji. you got this, babe, you're his dad and he needs you not his uncle."

it took a while to convince bokuto that he was going to be find and to get off the phone so he can start comforting your son. bokuto did as you said, cradling him in his arms while he walked around the house and pointing to the pictures on the wall until your son finally calmed down. the only problem was that his son would start crying again whenever he attempted to bring him down, tiny hands clinging around his neck and onto his shirt.

you arrived home around 8 pm, announcing your arrival only to be met with silence at the door.

"kou?"

your eyes softened as soon as you found him asleep on the couch with your son on top of his chest, his strong arms wrapped securely around the tiny human being. you quietly kneel beside the couch, stroking bokuto's hair which slowly woke him up.

"i'm home." you smiled.

bokuto brought a finger to his lips and you pressed your lips together, taking your son away from his arms so you can tuck him in for the night.

"i'm sooo tired," bokuto whined, resting his head on top of your chest and cuddling close to you as soon as you joined him in bed. "it's my turn to be baby."

you snorted, bokuto's soft snores filling the quiet room in just a few seconds. "goodnight baby."

reblogs & feedbacks r appreciated<3

2021 (c) sevmch | do not copy or repost.

[thatnarcissisticfeel]

hi! so i don’t rlly know how to even phrase this but lately i’ve had a lot of stuff getting worse, none of the “basic” diagnoses i have (like depression and anxiety and stuff) describes it at all. so i’ve started questioning if i maybe have a personality disorder bc it’d all make sense, both the behaviors and how i see the world and why its only getting worse and more noticeable now etc.

i keep finding myself in cluster B PD traits and lately ive been reading more on NPD and i genuinely completely see myself in the description of the covert subtype. i always blame others for everything and am completely unable of accepting or feeling guilt. nothing is ever my fault, its always someone else doing something or provoking me or it’s the way i was raised or it’s because of the system etc. i’m deeply insecure but hate showing any kind of vulnerability. when i’m in a vulnerable position i get ashamed and angry bc i cant stand feeling weak. i often get so angry i do shit that could easily destroy all the relationships i have. i never apologize (unless it’s a situation where i have to in order to save the relationship but still never actually feel sorry) bc that’s showing vulnerability and admitting i’m wrong. i always compare myself with others, i used to think this doesnt apply to me bc i generally don’t care about typical things such as popularity and status as i’ve always been an outcast - and it’s kind of a major part of my identity that i feel different than everyone else (even though its most likely just how i was forced to learn to cope with being excluded), but i’ve come to realize i absolutely do always see myself as “the worst one” in terms of mental health. i can’t stand others talking about their issues bc no you don’t even have it that bad at all, i’m worse. i feel like no one will ever be able to truly understand me bc the majority of people are npcs anyway. no one thinks for themselves, they dont have any self awareness and just do what they’re told. i treat others like shit but still expect them to be nice to me because i deserve it because i’m sick. i deserve more attention from doctors because of how unwell i feel. i should be the one that gets treated first. i obviously never voice these feelings but it makes me so pissed off when i have to wait like i’m never important enough for anyone. like there was this one case when i had to wait longer for my appointment bc some girl came in due to an emergency and all i felt was angry and annoyed and like when is it my turn to get taken seriously?? i completely lack affective empathy and very rarely genuinely care about others. others being sad annoys me and others being happy makes me angry, sometimes even to the point of having homicidal thoughts. i’m envious of pretty much everyone who i consider better off than me. and again i dont mean shit like money or clothes but more like just the ability to be normal, having close friends, being in a relationship, all that stuff i know i’ll never be able to have bc of my mental illnesses. i’ve never been able to form genuine relationships, i do have a few friends but they all mean nothing to me and are just there so i’m not lonely. i’ve never been able to feel love or affection for anyone. and when i think abt it i dont even really want to be like them, i just want to make them suffer. i lie to everyone and only reveal my “true” self when im having a breakdown and basically cant control myself anymore as i have so much suppressed anger inside i sometimes feel like i have to genuinely put effort into stopping myself from physically attacking others; who cares abt words when im that far gone. and even then i later turn it around and make it seem like im just depressed and stuff (which is true, but theres also so much more no one knows about). everyone around me considers me a shy meek polite nice caring person and it just feels so ironic.

idk what to do at this point, genuinely. writing it all down like this makes me sound so fucked up even though i act relatively normal when i’m stable enough. but in reality i feel like on the inside i’m just breaking, i’ve had to turn to drug abuse as its literally the only thing that helps me cope with everything & prevent me from being even more destructive (towards both others and myself) and its making me even more short tempered when im sober and even more paranoid someone’s going to find out and get me in trouble. my therapist knows about it but doesnt do shit. ive been on so many psych meds before but its as if literally nothing ever works on me. like i would never normally seek advice on tumblr out of all places but i thought just maybe i would get understood here as i keep getting just either ignored or insulted on places like reddit (sure jan calling me a psycho is definitely going to help my issues when all i did was fucking ask how to cope with my issues).

sorry abt the wall of text. do you have any advice? ive been going to therapy for years but its all useless. i cant be honest with anyone for pretty obvious reasons. i just really dont feel like living for much longer. but even just acknowledging this ask and not judging me would mean a lot.

I obviously can’t diagnose you, but I will say a LOT of what you said is behaviors that and I other NPDs do, which makes me think that even if you don’t have it, advice and such that is geared towards pwNPD could help you. Unfortunately there isn’t much self-help geared towards pwNPD (I say self-help bc clearly your therapist is not a good therapist for you and I know it would probably be difficult to get a new one), but DBT workbooks are a good place to start. I think they’re technically geared more towards BPD, but they can definitely still help narcissists. Stuff like this is why I hate how much NPD is stigmatized, because we all DO deserve help and we all DON’T deserve to feel like this.

It sounds pretty basic, but are you a part of anything like online NPD/cluster B support groups, ie discord servers? Obviously they’re not a cure-all, but even just being around people who have the same thing and who you don’t have to mask around can help. If you don’t have any I could happily provide some if I can find a public one. Of course, communities like that can be a hit or miss, but it’s definitely at least worth a shot to try to find a group of people who are struggling with the same thing.

Another piece of advice, which might sound completely neurotypical on the surface, is to start journaling or writing down feelings. It might seem like just a small thing but having a place that only you can access where you can talk about things like vulnerability could be a good starting point, because at least you’re admitting it to yourself and getting it out there in some way. Lying to everyone and not being able to show your true self is really exhausting, so having one space that’s yours and yours only where you can learn to be comfortable with being vulnerable — even if it’s just to yourself — is a tiny thing that can work wonders. It doesn’t have to be some super dramatic “dear diary, woe is me” type thing, it can be something as simple as “Today I fucked up, and I know I fucked up, but I still blame xyz, I hate xyz.” That way you’re getting the vulnerable thoughts AND the angry thoughts out there without 1.) hurting others with the angry thoughts or 2.) having to show vulnerabity which would hurt you.

Of course the end goal might be to “unlearn” the behaviors, so to speak, but that can’t be done overnight, and until it is done, it’s better to have a few places to be open, even if it’s just amongst yourself or other pwNPD.

I hope this helped, lmk if you need more advice — and definitely know that you’re not alone, as cheesy as it sounds.

[maibi]

The Past Never Forgets

Pt. 1

Dabi x reader

Warnings: killing, cursing

Summary: as a cast out by society you find your way to the League of Villains. Your family that had given up on searching for you after you ran away , but after 5 years, in some mysterious way, they found your hide-out. 

A/n: I got the quirk idea from someone else bc my brain isn’t working with me. They have a lot of other fan made quirks I will put the link right here, you can check it out!! ( https://www.wattpad.com/672985786-my-fan-quirks-venom ) 

—————————————————————————

Life wasn’t really something that had been going great for you. In fact your life had been pretty shit. You were an outcast, hated by society, hated by your own family. All because of your unbearable quirk. You had no place to feel safe and no place to call home. Your family made sure you never used your quirk because it could cause deaths among your loved ones. Your childhood was ruined all because of the image they wanted to hold as a family. they put their desires of fame above your well-being and you saw only one option to change that. And that was by running away. The only thing you had been taught was to hate what you used to love, you were basically emotionless.

As a teenager of 16 years old you decided to run away from home. You never got treated right and you were seen as a death-threat. You yourself didn’t see any problems with your quirk, but your family had other opinions about that. There were rules for you, and only you. None of your siblings had any of these rules, because their quirks were hero-like and yours was villain-like. If you used your quirk without permission you would be left in a dark room with no food for a whole day. They would call this discipline, but in reality this was child abuse. The only person caring about you was your grandma, but after she passed away you had no reason to stay in that house.

Your family tried searching for you, but gave up quickly when they realized life would be much better without you around. You quickly realized that life would also be much better without them. You had blamed yourself for your quirk. For all those years in that place that was a so called home, you had believed that your quirk was a threat to society. That if you made the wrong moves they would take a hold of your life. But after running away, and finding people that adored you for your quirk, it made you realize what a real family was. And you realized that your quirk was more than just a threat to society, it was something that belonged to you and only you. 

You were the holder of the Venom quirk.

For 5 years you wandered around, going from city to city and doing about anything to provide yourself some food and a place to sleep. You never stayed put, that wasn’t your way of going. You went from place to place, exploring different streets from every city and making yourself known within the “villain community”. It wasn’t every day people got to see a venom quirk in action, so they were all curious enough to let you stay with them.

One day, before you had settled down, you were wandering around a new city, chewing on some stolen buns, you walked in a side street, hidden from the citizens. You saw blue flames and it struck to you. You had always liked the color blue, it was a pretty color compared to your dark purple venom, you didn’t like the color purple after all. You had watched the holder of the blue flames do his thing on a person who was trying his hardest to escape. He was unable to let out a sound as the blue flame man was keeping his hands strongly around his throat. 

You were interested in this person, not because he was probably a villain, but mainly because you thought his quirk was cool. Oh yeah, and of course because of the color blue. You wanted to know who’s quirk would be stronger. You were curious, so you budged in, not caring about what would happen. You threw your bun on the ground.

“I mean, that’s pretty kinky”, you said. 

his hand shot in your direction, but you were quick to react. Before his flames could hit you, you had made an X motion with your arms, letting out your venom in a shield form, protecting you from the burning flames. If there was one thing you had learned from wandering on your own, it were quick reflexes. you felt that his flames were powerful, but you knew for a fact that he didn’t use all of his strength.

“You got some good reflexes”, he said continuing to strangle the small dude. 

“You seem... interested in that kind of stuff”, you said, pointing at his hands around the man’s throat. 

“well what can I say, it’s tempting sometimes”, he said with a smirk. “I mean you can join in if you’d like that.”

He dropped the man and watched him crawl his way in the other direction. “That’s your prey, you sure you wanna just let him escape?”, you curiously asked, smirking back at him.

“He can’t go far, the next person will get him”, he said as he properly turned around and leaned against the stone cold wall. You couldn’t help but laugh at the thought of him actually freezing against the cold wall right now. “Now tell me, what brings you to this side of the city?”

“I saw blue flames and I like the color blue”, you shrugged, placing your hands in your pockets. “Nothing more.”

He walked closer to you, examining you from head to toe with his eyes. You let him, because in the end what did you have to lose? If he wanted to kill you, he would have probably already tried to do that. But he was just looking at you, probably trying to figure out how your quirk was supposed to work. 

“You saw blue flames and you like the color blue”, he silently repeated your sentence. His eyes stopped trailing down your body when he connected eyes with you. “Do you have any clue as to who I am?”

“Not the slightest”, you answered, breaking the eye contact first by walking past him to the direction the person that was a victim of his blue flames. He was gone, with only a splash of blood and a limb on the ground. You smiled to yourself. He had not survived just like flame boy said.

This could get interesting. You had thought to yourself. 

“What exactly is it that you do around here”, he asked while walking behind you. “Never saw you around here. You new?”

“You could say that”, you answered. But left out the fact that you were only new to the city and not to the whole “villain” thing, because giving away your life wasn’t really your plan yet.

“What about you? I never heard of you”, you said.

“My name is quite known here”, he smirked, walking closer to you. “The name is Dabi.” 

“Nice to meet you infamous Dabi”, you said as you inched closer too, showing him you were by no means intimidated by him. “I look forward to hearing and seeing you more often.”

After that you had made yourself known in the new city you visited, the city were you had met Dabi, the so called famous villain. You did hear a lot about him, making him a lot more interesting. There were many encounters between the two of you and he had tried to convince you to join his little group of friends called the League of Villains. You liked to work independent, so you kindly rejected his offer. 

But it wasn’t after a very fierce battle that Dabi had been heavily injured. You wouldn’t consider yourselves friends at that time, but you were close enough to not let him die. You hadn’t received from him what you had wanted. So you brought him to his hide-out, where the other members of the League were. 

The time you had spent there as just “a visitor”, had turned into you wanting to have more fun so you decided to join, without a plan. You were still allowed to move on your own so you didn’t see that much of a problem. They weren’t people with rules, or whatever. You lived freely, and you were happy about that.

You had made that place your home. Things that started off as a joke, turned into things that were important to you. These people were the people that didn’t fear you, but were happy to battle with you. These people wanted to get stronger for their own sake and didn’t live up to the will of other’s. Even if they looked like emotionless people, they cared about each other. And that was a place you liked to call home.

that all lead to the present. You were sitting with Dabi at the edge of high building, thinking about some random plan Shigaraki had made you think about. It wasn’t even necessary, he just needed a back-up plan.

“We’re not really gonna write this down are we?”, you asked as you held a piece of paper and a pen in your hands. “Shigaraki has to be kidding if he really wants a back-up plan for this one. I’m 99% sure we’re winning this one.” You slowly watched your venom eat up the paper as you threw the pen off of the building. 

Shigaraki had planned to attack UA, you didn’t really care about UA, but because Shigaraki had let you do just about anything while being with them you didn’t mind helping him out. “We can never go wrong with a back-up plan, you know.”

“But I mean, he has been planning for over a month now. How wrong can stuff go? Worst case scenario is that we retreat. They can’t possibly be this cautious beforehand?”

“Oh, you don’t know UA. They do just about anything to keep school grounds safe. They have everything ready for literally the worst case scenario”, Dabi said.

“But everything has been planned out, we literally searched for every possible thing that could go wrong and we found a solution for that. I really don’t think we need this. Besides, since when does Shigaraki want back-up plans, he never did-”, your head shot up in realization and you slapped dabi across his chest as you lightly gasped. “You little shit. Shigaraki didn’t ask us to make a back-up plan! Why did you bring me here then?!”

“Ding ding ding, someone caught on”, he said as he slowly rose to his feet.

“But why!”, you asked as you also stood up.

“To protect you”, he said smugly.

“To protect me?”, you said questionably. “And why would you do that? I survived on my own for 5 years on the street, I think I can handle some high school children.”

He came closer to you and kissed your lips for only a second. He did this often, it’s not like it was the first time he did it, but it always left you a little flustered. It was not everyday you had received any form of affection, so it was all new to you. You two weren’t in a “relationship”, but it sure was something along those lines. Whenever he’d kiss you, your so called superiority went down a little only because you did not know how to act. But you never let yourself get trampled over. 

“Dabi I’m serious here, why did you take me here. If Shigaraki is fighting some people right now we should at least help him. Your own feelings shouldn’t come first place when it’s such a dangerous thing. I can care for my own, so let’s go help Shigaraki. He helped us out too many times to leave him alone there”, you said in a strict tone, showing him that you were by no means playing. “Besides I haven’t thrown a good punch in a while, I need this.”

“It was him that told me to bring you here, tho I would have even if he didn’t ask me to”, he said. “Your family found your occupation. Not the real hide-out, but you know the one where we-”

You slapped a hand on his lips, making sure he didn’t continue that sentence. Your face was flushed and his lips turned into a smirk. You didn’t like it when openly talked about your intimate relationship. He knew exactly how to fluster you, but right now wasn’t really the best moment to do so. 

You looked at the ground, eyebrows furrowed. Your family really had the audacity to come search for you now? It felt like bullshit to you. You looked at Dabi and straightened your posture. “All the more reasons for me to head over and take a look.”

[janiedean]

Book!Theon is Azor!Ahai, not Jon. It makes no sense narratively for Jon to be AA, and it’s the most stereotypical thing ever, and he’s already stereotypical, he’s the red flag for the audience. Theon’s chapters are full of hints, he has the perfect salt/smoke/stars/dragons thing at the end of ACOK, when he “dies”. His story is about destroying death, his entire narrative, with things that come from mythology and ancient literature, points to that. The show is trash, but don’t you think that it’s a little weird that Theon is there at the end and then Arya comes out of nowhere and becomes AA? And what ending does she get? Exploring the unknown SEA with SHIPS? Being free and on her own? Maybe it doesn’t make sense for her because it’s not for her. D&D already took everything else from Theon, they took this too. And even if he’s not AA, he’s still clearly connected to magic and all of that, he didn’t go though so much for nothing, he didn’t take his name back for the first time in his life, his name that literally means “godly”, for nothing. He has something big to do, and it’s about himself, not Robb and the Starks. And he’s also so clearly connected to the politics of the north and of the iron islands, a villain was literally created for him, so I don’t understand how can you say he’s not really important and all he’s got left to do is retire in a house and be sad. Of course he has a lot of trauma and that’s important, but I don’t like how people reduce him to that and act like just because those things happened, he can’t do anything else

anon with no ill will and I swear I don't want to sound pedantic or anything but I, uh, never came to the conclusion you say I came from - that said let's go in order even if I think I already went through all the reasons why it makes literally no sense if it's anyone but jon, but let's start with one thing:

It makes no sense narratively for Jon to be AA, and it’s the most stereotypical thing ever, and he’s already stereotypical, he’s the red flag for the audience.

it's stereotypical.... to us maybe, but it is not to westeros. like, you're looking at it through audience-lens because it has been years and the show confirmed r+l=j and we all figured that shit out, but to westeros, the idea that the prince that was promised is a bastard guy serving on the wall aka a state-sponsored prison where people go to not die and is filled to non-desirables to society is... the least likely option in existence? no really, but again:

first thing that should quiet all doubts, when melisandre asks r'hollor to see azor ahai bc she wants to see stannis, r'hollor shows her jon snow and instead of going like 'uh wait why am I seeing another dude' she's like 'I want to see stannis but r'hollor shows me jon snow there must be some disturbance on the line', like she doesn't even consider for a second that it might be jon;

no one else has brought WITHIN THE NARRATIVE jon up as a likely candidate - they said stannis, they said dany, they said whoever but no one ever said hey jon snow might be AA, because again no one even suspects that it might be jon;

other matter that you're overlooking here: if theon is azor ahai.... it means that the rebellion basically was for nothing? because like the entire shtick with rhaegar targaryen's bad life choices™ is that he was apparently a swell dude, then he read a book where somehow it was exactly explained how the apocalypse was gonna happen, he deduced that he was the guy who had to father AA/the prince that was promised and in order - first he doesn't care about fighting but suddenly after that he starts getting learned; - he immediately worries over having THREE children from which we can deduce from the narrative that as far as he knows in order to fight when the wights come he has to have three kids for three dragons and one of them is azor ahai; - the moment his wife can't have more than two even if he's sure that he already had the right one (aegon) he still runs off with lyanna to make sure he has the third because it's that important that HE rhaegar targaryen fathers the three heads of the dragon... to the point of starting a civil war and most likely giving arthur orders to make sure that the kid lives at all costs even if he thinks lyanna's kid is NOT AA; - let's remember that the entire schtick is also that 'he is the ptwp and his is the song of ice and fire' which means that this kid of rhaegar's is the person these books are titled after.

now, let's look again at tyrion's infamous quote which I always bring up in these cases but let's refresh our memory here Prophecy is like a half-trained mule. It looks as though it might be useful, but the moment you trust in it, it kicks you in the head now: given this, we can absolutely assume that no single prophecy in this book goes the way the person at the end of it interprets it... which means that rhaegar was wrong on a lot of accounts, but guess what, the thing is that one out of three of his kids is dead (if we count aegon as trueborn, if he's not then two on three but I think he's trueborn) and the one who hatched the eggs/has the dragon is DANY so he already was wrong on head of the dragon #1, and he can absolutely be wrong on aegon being tptwp which would mean mistake #2 and we should know about the prophecy, but one of his children being AA and his being the song of ice and fire looks a bit too much of a stretch to be incorrect and have AA being someone else's son also would be.... but if AA is jon ie the one he had for last that he was sure was not AA and who doesn't even have the targ name (nor the stark one) and no one suspects having that kinda ancestry then yes it fits exactly all the parameters and it still allows for rhaegar to have partially misinterpreted the entire thing even in large chunks but not enough to make it look like he was completely making shit up, which... I mean the long night is coming I don't doubt he had very good reasons to want to stop it; also, anon not to beat the dead horse, but: - jon's death fits all the prophecy parameters already there's the bleeding star, the smoking wound and the salt of the tears which btw is not obvious nor something you'd immediately do 2+2 about... which fits perfectly with the above - jon died and came back to life in the godforsaken show like he's literally the only idiot who resurrected in it and we're supposed to handwave it the way dnd did? - jon has a valyrian steel sword that he can handle while theon atm really doesn't - we could argue that ygritte could be a possible nissa-nissa contender though I mean maybe it could also be that he and val get hot and bothered and it turns out it's her or someone else and that hasn't happened yet but surely there's more evidence for that with jon than with theon - theon has like... povs in two books for a total amount of less than fifteen chapters, jon has at least ten chapters per book or so on, which just mathematically makes jon a main fiver character while theon is not and like I understand deconstruction and all but you don't make your ace in the hole mystical prince hero character someone who has had fifteen chapters total at most unless I remember wrong the amount he had in acok in comparison to someone who was a main throughout the entire thing - like guys I say it as someone whose third-fave char is theon, theon is not a main fiver™ character and that's okay that's not the point, and with that I don't mean he's not important, I mean that he's not one of the five main ones that have most of the plot stuff on their shoulders and he's not THE main character, because if theon is AA then these books are named a song of theon greyjoy and considering that the main five are jon tyrion arya dany and bran I think it's highly not probable that at the end of it theon is the one character to rule them all

and that was for how jon fit the criteria, but theon doesn't fit them because again he doesn't have a number of chapters/povs that justifies such a plot twist, balon is certainly not rhaegar and I don't see how rhaegar reads a prophecy wrt balon and thinks it's about him, the heads of the dragon should be three and theon had three siblings two of which are dead and asha has no tie to the dragon storyline, this means that theon should be able to ride/command a dragon and we know that in theory just targs can and there's already three of them around - dany jon and aegon - and if anyone who's not a targ has a narrative reason to ride a dragon is tyrion not theon... and tyrion is a main fiver too, also there's the nissa-nissa/burning sword angle and as it is theon could absolutely use a bow again but a longsword with his hands maimed like that and no muscle mass would be a bit implausible, in order for the reborn prophecy to actually make sense it means his last adwd chapter should have smoke, salt and the bleeding star which it doesn't but jon's has so there's that

now, re what you said wrt theon:

Theon’s chapters are full of hints

not really? he doesn't have a tie to the magical storyline beyond his connection to bran. they have hints for a lot of things but that he's AA? idt so

he has the perfect salt/smoke/stars/dragons thing at the end of ACOK, when he “dies”

okay but then I could use the same argument for saying that AA could be davos when he survives blackwater because he says he woke up in wreckage of smoke in salty water, and then stannis has equally valid arguments bc he has the shiny sword and he's in dragonstone etc and we all know it's not stannis, also an AA death at the ending of acok when the topic has barely been introduced in dany's vision is entirely too early for me to drop that bomb

his story is about destroying death, his entire narrative, with things that come from mythology and ancient literature, points to that.

his story is about overcoming trauma and abuse and not dying in the process (which is why I think the show was trash) and okay but everyone in these books has something that comes from a mythology or ancient literature, like jaime brienne and c. all have arthuriana roots same as bran, doesn't make any of them a viable AA candidate

The show is trash, but don’t you think that it’s a little weird that Theon is there at the end and then Arya comes out of nowhere and becomes AA?And what ending does she get? Exploring the unknown SEA with SHIPS? Being free and on her own? Maybe it doesn’t make sense for her because it’s not for her.

considering that maisie williams was shocked that arya was AA and she also thought it made no sense and that dnd never thought theon had his own storyline while I can agree on the fact that it fits more for him as an ending than for arya, I don't think that means it makes him AA, same as I think that they gave sansa his storyline and possibly his confrontation with ramsay and I'm not 100% convinced on the last part anyway but that just means they didn't realize theon doesn't exist for the starks' storyline, also like.. in the show everyone but c. was in WF and theon was already dead when arya did her thing and honestly idt the battle of the long night will ever go like that anyway so idt even partially show truthing is bringing us anywhere

and even if he’s not AA, he’s still clearly connected to magic and all of that, he didn’t go though so much for nothing, he didn’t take his name back for the first time in his life, his name that literally means “godly”, for nothing

I never said it was for nothing which I'll elaborate in a second and ofc he's connected to the magic storyline... because he's connected with bran's storyline and his last round of atonement has to happen through bran in the sense that since he was the one basically forcing bran out of wf now he most likely has to facilitate bringing him back or smth (surely not dying for him), but like whatever magical stuff he has going on it has to do with bran dot, not with AA which I still think he doesn't have a stricter text connection to than davos has for that matter and idt davos is AA as I think I made clear

He has something big to do, and it’s about himself, not Robb and the Starks.

never said he didn't, and I also said that I wasn't going to speculate in detail about what theon has to do because I don't think there are enough text elements to say it now but there will be when wow comes out for sure, but like again I don't want to make predictions when I don't have the elements and wrt theon's themes/possible canon ending etc I always said that he most likely isn't going to inherit the islands but that he'll do something huge before the books are done which is gonna be tied to the northern storyline and possibly to bran because he has to go specular to acok - acok is his downfall, adwd is 'I'll find myself again', wow+ados have to be what would theon do if he decides his own thing while being his own person, or recycling my old THEON HAS HEGELIAN THEMES IN HIS STORYLINE acok = thesis, adwd = antithesis, wow+ados = synthesis so obviously he has something huge in the plans.... I just don't think it means he's AA

And he’s also so clearly connected to the politics of the north and of the iron islands, a villain was literally created for him, so I don’t understand how can you say he’s not really important and all he’s got left to do is retire in a house and be sad

aaand here we get to the point which is that... I never said that? I honestly never said that? I said he has to overcome his trauma and live and thrive and be happy after that. if he retires in a house at the end of ados after he does whatever he has to do in the main plot it's going to be because it's what he wants to do and most likely he and jeyne are going to be adorbs while doing it together or smth or if he goes back to the islands and advises asha then he's going to be happy doing that too, but like... the entire point of theon's sl is that he overcomes that horrendous abuse while not being a perfect good victim™ throughout and still be happy after and gain his redemption? that's what I always said. I never said that now he can just retire and be sad. trauma recovery is becoming happy after getting over your trauma. not being sad. and like.... sometimes not getting amazing mythological things but just being happy by yourself is actually a goal? again, grrm is a lapsed catholic. if I know that breed and I do, he doesn't think redemption and happiness are in shortage at the supermarket. and in order for theon to have narrative importance/weight/relevance he doesn't have to do magical mythological IMPORTANT™ things (even if I think he does have something cooked up as I said above), but like the entire point of his sl is the trauma recovery. he's there for that. that's literally his point in the plot and the fact that grrm created a villain for him means that he thinks it's an important thing to explore.

also I personally think that theon's arc is the best written thing in those books so like I don't want to undermine its importance, I just don't think that in order to be important™ then theon has to be dragged kicking and screaming into main fiver territory because there isn't the need.

. Of course he has a lot of trauma and that’s important, but I don’t like how people reduce him to that and act like just because those things happened, he can’t do anything else

I don't like that either esp. when coming from dnd who didn't even let him have it fully, but: and when did I ever do it? I never said that theon is only his trauma. my standing opinion wrt theon is that he's grrm's best written/constructed character (along with jaime) and his most innovative one (jaime following but theon wins it) because theon deconstructs the backstabber trope which I already went on about but:

again usually ppl who backstab the good protagonist™ get caught and punished and you never hear their pov

theon has all the povs

he's the main char in that storyline not robb

he has entirely understandable reasons that ppl decided aren't sympathetic just bc they don't want to admit that in his position they'd have done the same thing

the audience hates him for having contributed to robb's downfall but then he gets a comeuppance that's completely not what anyone would deserve for that and he gets the spotlight/the sympathy again

he gets narrative redemption saving jeyne so you can see he's not an asshole at all

has to get through horrific abuse for his entire life not just with ramsay, he's not a good victim™ but he's still written in a way that makes you want to root for him and at the end he actually comes through so you want him to keep on succeeding

which is smth that with the backstabber trope never happens

now the thing is that theon's there bc a) identity issues b) trauma recovery storylines that then get tied to bran's main one but like idg why just having the recovery storyline would make him lesser - saying he's not a main fiver doesn't mean he's not important, it means he's not a MAIN™ character... which in asoiaf doesn't matter bc even ppl without povs are important to the narration and are there to drive a point (see sandor and stannis), and I don't see why saying that the most important part of his sl/the one grrm wants to stick with the readers is the survivor part of it rather than whichever heavy magic related plot thing he has to play in the future means undermining his importance. and while I think he has that role, idt it's the most important one he has bc being a survivor is what sells his storyline/the entire arc of his character.

then if come wow I'm wrong I'll be like okay I fucked up, but: honestly, imvho there is no way that azor ahai is not jon snow, the fact that collectively as a fandom we think it's obvious doesn't mean people in westeros do, each single point of evidence is at jon and if occam's razor is a thing then it's jon and that's okay because as deconstructed chosen one as he is, jon is still the protagonist of these books and regarding the prophecy above, it makes a lot more sense that this series is titled a song of jon snow and not a song of theon greyjoy and I say this as someone who vastly prefers theon as a character. also, if smth is well-written, readers should see it coming, so the fact that jon is AA isn't predictable if it's true, it's grrm.... knowing how to write a book and plant his hints because if everyone guessed right then if he makes it suddenly someone else bc jon is too predictable then it's dnd making it arya bc SURPRISE WE NEEDED YOU TO GO LIKE WTF HAS JUST HAPPENED INSTEAD OF FOLLOWING THE NARRATION TO ITS NATURAL CONCLUSION, not 'it's too predictable' or the audience red herring the way jaime being the valonqar is an audience red herring. jon being AA should be absolutely obvious for the reader who paid attention and a total surprise for the other characters in the narration, the audience red herring is more dany than anyone else imvho and I'm dying on that hill for now, thanks for coming to my ted talk but like I don't see how it's anyone but jon personally X°D

[seawitchkaraoke]

I’m having a lot of thoughts about the Thomas Sanders not paying animators thing and I can’t seem to formulate them in a way that actually says what I want to say but... idk. I think a lot of it is a problem that’s... kinda pervasive in general in youtuber/influencer fandoms:

It’s a fandom full of young people who tend to idolize and “stan” people colliding with creators who never really learnt the buisness aspect of creating.

What I mean is, a lot of these youtubers started doing youtube (or vine to start with in Thomas’ case) for fun, not for money or anything and then they gained  fans and eventually got enough of a following to quit their day job and just create videos for a living. And then these people might

A) not know how to deal with people who idolize you, bc like, obviously not, I don’t think anyone really gets trained for that except maybe the kids of celebrities or smth and

B) not really know too much about the buisness side of things, aka how to budget a video and all that.

Like. This issue seems like a combination of “we didn’t have the budget to pay them more (even though we have a patreon and somehow we didn’t consider that then we’d just have to do a shorter video)” and “the animators signed the contract because they were inexperienced and trusted Thomas to know correctly and were so exited to work with him”.

On the other side, and I’m thinking of this bc I’ve been watching them a lot lately, you have people like the try guys who started on buzzfeed and who, at buzzfeed, learnt how to do every step of video production INCLUDING how to do a budget. Now the try guys in particular are lucky bc Ned has a math background and loves spreadsheets (and idk how other ex-buzzfeed people are dealing with the money side of things) but it probably still helps that they have that experience.

Plus buzzfeed was all about creating viral videos. If what you do for a living is make videos, that will hopefully get millions of views? You’re gonna learn how to deal with those millions of people making assumptions (both positive and negative) about who you are based on who you are in videos so then when you build a loyal fanbase, you might deal with them also doing that a little better (maybe. idk, again, i don’t think anything really prepares you for this stuff).

I don’t really know where I’m going with this, really just saw some parrallels and noticed that the try guys seem far more professional than Thomas in a lot of ways and wondered why. And I think it’s because interacting with fans was a job for them from the start, they never had the weird uncomfortable transition between being friends with all 10 people who watch your channel and having 10 thousand people who still all feel like they’re your friends even though obivously you can’t know all of them personally. It was always a job for them and so being professional was a requirement from the start, and not an “oh shit, i gotta do this now” kinda thing.

Obviously, so no one reads this wrong, I’m not cancelling Thomas any more than I am idolizing the Try Guys, no one is perfect and expecting perfection from anyone will lead to disappointment. I still really hope Thomas adresses this either privately with the animators or publicly and does better if he does a project like this again.

[bansheeoftheforest]

Me like a week ago: Oh! Syndicate is being sold here for just 15 dollars! I should buy it because it looks neat and my friend reccomended it :3

My siblings: Ą̸̯͉͍̻̻̿̂̂̍̏̓̑ś̷̹͕̲̰͙̖̮͓͝s̶̥͉̽͆̎̔̔͐̈́̚a̶͎̺̹̭͙̞͆s̴̛̩̝͙͉̱̭̋̓̿͝s̶͍̠̲̙̙̓͑̍͘̕̕i̶͕̻͕̤͓͍̺͎̐̀͐̏̇̐͆̈́n̴̻̹̯̲̻̈́̓ş̸̯̜̥̻͎͎͊̉͗͑͜ ̶̝̮̇̄Ç̴̩̺͚̺̰͆̃̂̆͋͝͝͝͝ṟ̵̛͇̯͉̼͍̳͓́̓̎͋͒͂̾ẹ̶̗̏͛̃ę̸̡͈̥̟͎̀̃́͑́͂͗̇̏̓d̴̨̲̥̫͌̾̈́̊̍͘

Anyway we now own 3 assassins creed games-

-

Tbh this entire time I've been imagining that Henry's brothers forced him to join! Like he was just walking home from college for the week (as he usually stays in his dorm), and when he gets in the house there's alot of. Rather expensive looking items. And are those guns? Is that drugs?! And then while hes noticing all this stuff (and maybe even considering this is the wrong house) he feels a gun to his head and there's his brothers, saying that he has to join them

Oh gosh if the Jekyll brothers have all been in this since Henry was in college. That's like. Alot of his life in fear and in the gang

I imagine specifically the Jekyll brothers are all pretty low on money because they sorta just, ran away and Henry's in college. So while Henry's away Kent and Rapheal end up joining a gang, and ending up pretty high ranked decently fast, like a few months? The two are a very good team. They also believe fully on the templars cause, whatever that is, I wasn't paying much attention

Also! Here's the database entry on them from the game that I'm tired of having to pull up every time XD

"Born to a long family line of seafarers, the Jekyll brothers, Kent and Raphael, follow in their forefathers' footsteps. All sorts of illegal trade are thus welcomed eithin the London ports, right under the government's nose. All imports go through the Jekyll brothers, and quickly find a home on the black market."

Henry is the youngest brother but I dont know by how much. I've decided that since quests have fun lil names that he's called "The Weeping Templar" because it sounds cool :3c

-

Ahhh I'm still working on those drawings of Jekyll in his mask, it's rather hard to find references for all these outfits you know. But here's a lil sneak peak

I couldn't decide on an outfit so I decided on 🌟every outfit🌟. Henry sorta just throws em on. Not caring what rank or person is supposed to wear what, as he's just trying to get his templar outfit off as soon as possible

Also. All the gang clothes have the opposite problem of Jacob and Evie. All the guys look like they just stumbled half drunk out of bed, and all the gals I Want To Own All The Clothes Of Immediately

Also also. I just checked the time on the canvas to see how long I've been working on it and ack-. I'm pretty sure I must have left ibisPaintX open or something because no way its actually been 18 hours- I'm not even shading these

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My sister started playing syndicate so Soon. We'll know what Kent is truly supposed to look like. As in game I consider more canon than the database

I'm also having fun thinking it's both. Like after that database picture was made he grew a beard

That's exactly what happened to me and I am so glad you are falling into the pit of AC despair that I fell into as well. You better play Origins sometime, that game is absolutely fucking amazing <3

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Man... I have such a hard time making up my mind bc at one point, I love the thought of Raphael and Kent falling into bad crowds and forcing Henry down with them (maybe guilt-tripping him by saying that they are all he has bc they are family and shit? And it's thanks to them he managed to get out of their abusive household?) but I also love the thought of like... Raphael and Kent doing it so they can get money so they can actually support Henry through college. And the moment Henry is out of college and maybe learns the truth of how his brothers even got that money they force him to join, or he feels obligated to join because his brothers helped and supported him. I also imagined Henry working at the docks while writing the FK au bc I was projecting so! Man, I wonder how Robert would react if he found out about Henry's family. Or Rachel, for that matter. Like, at one point, she technically can't judge bc of Lucy and the fact that she herself started out as a pick-pocket but at the same time... The Blighters and Templars are so much worse... <3

Oooohohohh now I really want to imagine how the questline for Henry would be. Since he is going to later join the rooks, he wouldn't get murdered with his brothers... Would it be when Greenie tells the Lodgers that there This One Templar that is very much standing out bc they wear a mask that the Twins track him down, or would it be when they try to murder his brothers and find them already dead, their corpses rotting in their offices/somewhere else hidden? Or would it be when they have killed Henry's brothers, realize that they missed the third brother and track him down, only to end up on Dr. Henry Jekyll's doorstep? Bruh, I wish I could mod Syndicate, I would actually have wanted to make this into a playable questline. How would the questline continue to go? Would the twins trust him immediately? Or would Henry be the one to track them down by sending them his templar pendant and the mask, telling them to meet him at X place by Y time like Roth did? sjdfhhAJWHD. Man. I want to know so much more about this sdfsdf

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Man, are we having different dilemmas rn. I get so much gender envy from the guys' clothes but the outfits of the gals make me think of a mix between willy wonka (not the original one) and flappers. Don't ask why. I just really want a dress shirt that fits and some nice suspenders <3

BUT WANYWAYS. You are so mean. Now I really want to see the finished art aND. I AM SO CURIOUS NOW. SO MANY PIXELS HIDE TEH SECRETS. AHHHH. How and why are you so mean to me jst giving me sneak peaks sdfjhsdjf >:( XD

Your sister better enjoy this game <3 anyways I am very curious to see what the truth is now lol. That's going to be fun for sure XD