#because i love it and i wanna share it
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A Lifetime Served in a Little Cup
pt.1 / pt.2 / pt.3 / pt.4
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bill, babygirl, the red flags get outta there
#gravity falls#billford#the book of bill#standford pines#bill cipher#stump art#comic#A Lifetime Served in a Little Cup comic#AND WE'RE DONE !!!!#a month of my life condensed into a frantic gay mania#i'll wanna do a post-mortem at some point because that'll be FUN#but yeah i really love this stupid comic#was just a random concept i decided to commit to . thought this would take a weekend but lol#anyways to the folks who been reading i hope you enjoyed !!!!#they're gay !!! they're going to mutually self destruct !!!!!#they're going to accidentally both buy into the same timeshare in florida and then be forced to share !!!#romantic comedy of the fucking century !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#GOOD for THEM !!!!!!!!!!!!
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Disclaimer: I know about the duffle bag Filbrick threw at him, but you can ignore that if you want
My thoughts below the cut! (this turned into a whole ass fic lmao)
My personal headcanon is that Filbrick is as much of a coward as he is of an asshole. Therefore, he wouldn't have kicked Stan when he did in canon. Probably not for a while after that.
However, he does try to send him to military school. He keeps talking about how this kid needs to learn discipline and respect, and if he's not gonna bring money to the house, then he should at least bring some honor to his family.
Stan obviously does NOT want to go. Not only because it's a pointless war ("what've the vietnamese done to us anyways?") but because he remembers his mother's face when Shermie got drafted and he will NOT make her go through that hell again. Also, he doesn't wanna die!!!! Hello?????
He talks it out over the phone with Ford, who's obviously just as against it as he is. He tells Stan that, if he gets into a PhD program, he could skip military. Stan laughs in his face. It'd be easier to jump off the plane without a parachute.
And so, he comes up with a plan. When he goes to take his physical, he tries his best to botch it. If he is bad enough, if it looks like he can't do it, maybe he won't have to. Unfortunately, the recruiters are far too used to this by now, and they don't buy it. Stan goes home with a recruitment letter hidden in his jacket.
Everything goes downhill after that. He runs away from home, changes his name several times, does some crime here and there... The military is after him, and it doesn't take rejection kindly.
Stan stays out of contact with his family for a few years. He can't risk getting them involved in this mess. They don't deserve it. So he just leaves, without saying a word, in the middle of the night. No phone calls, no notes, nothing. Not even he knows where he's going. But if it just looks like he abandoned them, maybe they'll hate him. That will make them sound more believable with the police. They aren't covering for him, because they genuinely have no idea where he is. It's the best way to keep them safe.
In that time, Ford doesn't stop looking for him. He finds him every once in a while, but only his phone number, and he knows that could give away his brother's location and get the family in trouble. So, against his deepest instincts, he doesn't call.
One, three, five, seven years pass. Stan has been around almost all the country, and is genuinely considering leaving it. Maybe going to Mexico, or Colombia. Those sound nice. Maybe they'll be nicer to him.
He's passing his time and thinking about this in a small town restaurant in wherever he's in (somewhere he's not banned from, yet), when a family enters. He doesn't make eye contact, but he can't help but stare at them: a man and a woman, probably in their 50s, with 7 kids; one must be older than him, the second one around his age, the third one a little younger, the fourth one a teenager, and the last three between 10 and 15, no more. Except for the last three, they're all taller than him, even the mother, and they have various degrees of blond hair. Their clothes (overalls and plastic boots) suggest they must work in one of the farms he's seen around the state. They don't wear any accessories, except for the glasses that the father and four of the kids have. They're talking loudly and laughing. They look exhausted from a morning of hard work. They seem happy. They... look nothing like his family, and yet, he can't help but think about it.
He can't help the sob that comes to his throat. It's loud and messy from trying to suppress it, which obviously makes it worse. He covers his mouth immediately, and at that point he notices the tears that have run down his cheeks. "Great", he thinks, "that will make it easier to hide, for sure".
He doesn't move. He wants to escape, but that will draw even more attention to him, and he hasn't even paid for the food yet (normally he'd leave without paying, but the old waitress was kind enough to give him some extra food when she saw how little he ordered). He settles for not moving, lowering his head and covering his face, hoping that no one heard (unlikely) or cared (very likely).
"Ya'lright, son?"
The voice startles him. I wasn't very deep, but it was close enough to send his body into immediate danger mode. He looks up at the man towering over him, who's standing in front of him at a prudential distance.
"Y-Yeah, yeah, no worries."
He hates how broken his voice sounds. He's spent more than enough time sweet-talking his way out of trouble, he should be better at this by now. The man looks about as convinced by it as he is himself.
" 'lright then. Can I help ya?"
Damn villagers and their welcoming demeanor. If he wasn't a wanted man, he would appreciate it. But right now, it couldn't be worse timing.
"Come get ya food, kids!" The waitress' yell yanks him out of his thoughts.
"No", he blurts out, and he turns to the man. Least he can do is show him some respect and look him in the eyes. "I'm fine, thank you."
The man smiles lightly and nods. "Okay. Welcome to the town."
Stan watches as the man goes back to his table. He wishes he had been more polite, the guy was just worrying about him, but he can't afford it. They already know his face, he can't risk anyone else recognizing him-
"Sweet Mother of God almighty."
Stan turns to his right. One of the kids, the one about his age, is looking at him like he just grew a second head. He's frozen in place, his eyes wide as plates behind thick glasses. He doesn't say a word, and it's getting increasingly unnerving. Was the bruising on his face still visible? Maybe it's more apparent in broad daylight than in the shitty light that last motel had in the bathroom.
"I'm sorry, I- Can I ask your name?"
The fuck?
"No", answers Stan. Considering how nice his dad was, this guy is pretty rude.
"Son, leave him alone." The mother seems to have manners too, good to know.
The guy does pretty much the opposite. He comes closer to him, until he's right in his path, blocking his exit. That can't be good. Stan feels trapped.
"Are you Stanley Pines?"
Well, that's about it.
Stan tries his best to stay still. This guy doesn't look like a cop, not even an undercover one. But he knows his real name, so maybe someone in his family or friends works in the police; or worse, in the military.
"Listen man, I don't know who you're talking about, but that isn't my name. See?" He reaches for his wallet. He pulls out an ID, with a very clear Jackson Cage on it. He makes a mental note to change it soon, just in case his hunch is right and this guy has connections. "Now, if you excuse me, I'd like to pay for my food and leave. Move."
Stan is already on his feet, but the guy hasn't moved. Stan looks him up and down, trying to appear threatening despite his face probably still being a little red from before. He also gauges how feasible it'd be to escape if things turned bad; the dude is taller than him, sure, but he's also as thin as a toothpick, and by the anxious look on his face, he doesn't seem eager for a fight. The real problem would be evading the restaurant's staff and the other costumers, which include eight carbon copies of the guy in front of him. Probably better to try to de-escalate the situation.
"I- I can't let you leave. Please. I know who you are."
This man is making it really difficult to believe he's not a cop.
"No, you don't. I'm new in town. Move."
"Listen, I-"
"Move out of my way."
"I know your brother."
The words are like a bullet between his eyebrows.
"You look just like him-"
Against his better judgement, he quickly grabs he guy and pins him to the wood in between the booth benches, arm to his throat. If he knows Ford, he knows too much. God he just wanted to have lunch.
The commotion is immediate. He doesn't break eye contact with the guy who's grabbing his arm, whose strength is frankly surprising. He can hear, however, the screams from the dad and the siblings, as well as a couple of gasps from the other costumers. This is not going to go well, but fuck that. He's escaped worse.
"Stop!", the guy shouts as he keeps Stan's forearm from blocking his airway. "Don't hurt him! Don't get closer!"
It takes Stan a second to process what he said. The first part, sure, who wouldn't shout 'stop' when you're being attacked? But the second half doesn't make sense. Is he protecting him? The attacker?
Whatever it is, it works. The family stops in their tracks, still very ready to attack if needed. Out of the corner of his eye, he can see the three younger kids moving closer to their mother. For a split second, he feels a pang of remorse for the scene he just caused.
"Hang up the phone, Clarisse, it's okay. Please."
Stan looks in the direction the guy was talking to. Right behind him, the waitress reluctantly puts the phone down.
He looks back at the guy. He looks a little shaken up, probably from the impact his back (and his head?) made with the wooden plank, but he doesn't look scared. He almost looks... sympathetic? Stan is confused as hell.
"I know who you are", the guy whispers, low enough for Stan to hear alone. "You're Stanley Pines, and you have a brother named Stanford. I know him, okay? He's my friend. I met him a few years ago in a quantum physics congress and we've been talking ever since. He told me about his family in New Jersey, and about you. About how he hasn't seen you in years, and how he was trying to find you, to no avail."
Stan is gradually loosening his grip on the guy's neck, who takes a deep breath. He should know better, but- shit, hearing that Ford was looking for him was not what he expected. Even if he doesn't know yet if this guy is lying out of his ass, it's enough to make him doubt.
"I know you were called to Vietnam. He told me. I spent a week with him in his place when he found out, he was unconsollable. When you ran away, he called me. He knew what it meant for you and he thought he'd never see you again, whether you got caught or not. All because of that stupid war." Stan is now trembling a little, he knows it. This guy must know it too, with how close they are. If he stays here any longer he'll break down, but he can't move. Anything to hear his brother's name a little longer. "I know what it's like. Three of my cousins were drafted last year, and I know at least one of them won't be coming back home. Please... let me help you."
Stan meets his eyes. They're green and brown-ish, not unlike the immense fields he's seen in his last journey, the one that led him to this town. With the years, he's learned not to trust beautiful eyes, because they are better at hiding. These ones, however, seem serene and honest, just like his words, and he can't help but believing them. This guy, whoever the fuck he is, knows just about enough.
Stan lowers his right arm. The guy still has his hand on it, but this time is much less defensive and much more comforting. He doesn't complain.
"My name's Fiddleford McGucket, and I'm gonna help you find your brother."
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Essentially, after this Fidds calls Ford as if nothing happened (per Stan's request, since he's still paranoid about the police tracking his calls) and asks him to come to Tennessee. Ford argues that he's very busy and all, but Fidds convinces him in the end.
Obviously the twins have a dual breakdown and cry their heart out. In this AU they're much less emotionally constipated lol
Ford tells Stan that he's gonna build a house in a small town in Oregon as a part of his research, and asks him to move in with him once it's finished. Stan, of course, accepts.
In the meantime, Stan stays in the McGucket farm and helps them out as a way of laying low. He has a great relationship with his family, and they're very proud of him for what he did (i believe that the McGuckets are hippies at heart, and they're VERY anti-war, especially when it already took three of them)
I don't know how much of the canon storyline would this AU follow, but it's pretty much your average Mystery Trio AU with some different backstory
#please feel free to share your headcanons! i'd love to read them <3#when i tell you i CANNOT believe how much i've written here#i just re-read everything i was like 'did i write this? three hours ago? tf????'#i'm pretty happy with it tho#i feel like you can pinpoint the exact moment that my brain decided we were writing a fic instead of a headcanon lol#i don't know what to call this one so i'm just gonna call it#Drafted AU#also if you wanna know more about this idea that i literally just pulled out of my ass ask away!#gravity falls#gravity falls au#stanley pines#grunkle stan#stan pines#stanford pines#fiddleford mcgucket#fiddlestan#yes it's canon here because i said so#stan twins#mystery trio#tumblr polls#polls#my silly little headcanons#hells originals
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the funniest part about coming to mha late, was I knew bkdk was extremely controversial and had seen some of the discourse about from the outside, so when I finally decided to watch it I was shocked to discover just how much of the plot revolved around izuku having a huge crush on kacchan
#bakudeku#bkdk#chases him down with a broken arm to tell him his secret#gets powers from all might bc he saw his beloved was the boy being attacked by the sludge villain#ochako: isn’t that the kid who bullies you? izuku: YEAH HES AMAZING#I WANNA BEAT YOU BC YOURE AMAZING KACCHAN#copies all his moves#only decides to take the tournament seriously when kacchan does#just the entirety of kacchan v deku part two#trains with kacchan shares his top secret meetings with all night with kacchan#watches him longingly as he saves to win during the training exercise#goes into a bloodlust when kacchan takes a hit for him#only returns home when kacchan pleads with him to come back#kacchan gets murdered specifically because izuku loves him so much#izuku takes the fight with Shigaraki to the ground to protect kacchan’s dying body#longingly staring at him as kacchan saves all night#little baby izuku chasing him around and staring at him bc he’s just that besotted#kudo teasing izuku by bringing up kacchan#and that’s all just izuku don’t even get me started on Our Gaylord and Savior Kacchan
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loop 12
#hmswposting#cw blood#chonny jash#cj mind#cj soul#cccc#looks around . what do we think mind's version of apathy would be like .. considering it's widely accepted that heart gets The Pit#asking because i know what /i/ think#but i wanna hear it from otherss tooo ..... please always share interpretations on my art i love that shit so much
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Random hcs that have been on my mind for the past couple days: now in doodle format!
Text for each drawing written out under the cut in case it's not clear or anyone wants to translate it!
(1) <- Somehow soft?? <-Sometimes makes a comforting hum/rumble <-Holding for support
(2) <-Walks so quietly everywhere he goes <-Is about to meet god
(3) <-Can't see well in the dark (no eyelights) <-Can't help himself
(4) <-Thinks Color will turn Killer against him and convince him to run away
(5) <-Thinks Nightmare is using them all for the negativity and has brainwashed Killer into liking it
(6) <-Thinks if he runs and jumps at Cross as fast as he can Cross will lift him and it'll look so cool
#UTDR#UTMV#My Art#Horror Sans#Nightmare Sans#Color Sans#Killer Sans#These are all kinda random but at least I got something drawn today!!#I do really love the hc of Horror having that slasher movement about him#Because I have it too and I wanna share it with him#I can't stop scaring the people around me by entering rooms or walking up to them and I think he should have that too#It's almost always unintentional and scares him too when they suddenly yell#But sometimes... sometimes it's for funsies#Killer refuses to use a light of any kind even when he can't see so he's kind of asking for it#Also this is the short version of how I think Color and Nightmare are in a dadmare situation#They still have beef but it's like. they're both paranoid#They both think the other is gonna convince Killer to never see them again but it never happens#Maybe it gets resolved in some way but that's for another post#Also HorrorDust cuddles#Because that's the kind of nap I wanted to have earlier so I'm living vicariously through Dust#Also my first time trying to draw XChara! I hope I did okay!!#Trying to incorporate them into things slowly for Wick#Anyway I need to consider sleep goodnight gang!! :D
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when you pass a payphone and you decide to stop and call your brother to ask what's up, and you learn that in the couple of weeks since you've last heard from him you've become an uncle
[insert image of les sitting on the ground in front of the payphone after putting down the handset, bawling like a baby]
#this has been in my drafts for a few days but the baby asks made me wanna share#the baby got a redesign because the mom's design is finished and ready for launch#and yes the mom's name is gleena and i love her#trolls#dreamworks trolls#ex bandmates#trolls oc#hed#les#hazel#my art#i headcanon it's not uncommon for troll babies to remain nameless for a short period of time especially if they were quick in hatching#also i don't know if i like the headcanon that trolls have phones but i do love the thought of pay phones in the middle of a forest sgfdhhf#so now i guess only rock and funk trolls have phones but they're only stationary phones and very rare and expensive#which means les doesn't have one since he lives in a van#so he has to use a payphone#or send a letter
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Happy Birthday to Ferdinand von Aegir!
I actually made 33 emotes, affectionately known as Aegirglyphics to some, for my own personal use on discord. However, I figure why not share some of them! They're free to use for discord servers/icons/pfps or whatever. However, my only request is Do NOT use them as subscriber emotes on Twitch. You can make them free follower emotes but you are not to make them locked behind a paywall.
#fe three houses#ferdinand von aegir#discord emotes#i thought long and hard about this bc idk the actual want for emotes i made ages ago but#i still love my son and its his bday ad so i should be nice and share#since i no longer have nitro and can no longer use them myself#the fact i can technically post 30 at once was tempting but#some of them arent living up to my standards and also just might not be easy to use in most contexts#so those im gonna skip on lol#whoever wants 21 aegirglyphics tho have at em#i think i might have posted some before? but only 10 and i dont recall which ones#if you want a secret the last three and the middle on the second row are my favorites to use#i used concernednand (the upper one) so much#the internet concerns me guys it was a valid use every time#debated sharing heartnand but honestly the world could benefit from it imo because gotta spread that love#fun lil trivia i love making emotes and so when i was in a server and people knew me as the ferdinand fan and artist#someone was like why hasnt salmon made a ferdinand emote yet#and im like bc i dont run the server and i cant just demand they add my art#and then a mod was like i didnt wanna put pressure on salmon but i thought about it so i was like bet#and then drew a server exclusive happy ferdinand emote#and that was the start of me somehow being able to have like.... ten emotes in that server#some of them were just me joking and then mods encouraging me#cause i used to use felix for every single art prompt theyd give and one week someone said the prompt was pog#and i just was so upset because dude why would i wanna draw felix for that hes not pog#so a mod was like hey if you make a pog felix emote we ill add it to the emotes here#so i once again was like bet and then posted it and then they really added it lmao#anyway sorry for so many rambles please feel free to use them on discord in whatever server#i cant really expect everyone to credit me but also im not really concerned since i fear people know my nands a mile away
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hey uhhhh uhh would you be mad if someone (could be anyone) was to maybe (hypothetically) write something for the holy ghosts au. and by "something" haha. well lets justr say. the whole thang
PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE sorry no I would not be mad
#I’d love to see a dozen different ideations of this au#bc what I have planned for how it unfolds is probably so different than how everyone else thinks it will#I WANT TO SHARE MORE ABOUT IT#BUT IM A SUCKER FOR THE REVEALS#like I wanna have people follow it chronically instead of me drawing mini comics out of order because I feel like itttt#which I’ll probably do anyway but stillll ughhhh#ask
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#darkzyx#poll time#ok I’m just curious because I accidentally start writing important lore in the#tags like 80-90 % of the time#or just personal artist/author notes I guess???#I dunno haha#just extra stuff I wanted to say that I didn’t wanna make like#blatantly obvious with the caption#I love reading tags on posts and reblogs since it’s sort of tumblr’s way of commenting and sharing#at the same time!#and it took me an embarrassingly long time to realize this tumblr culture haha#after all#I posted to Instagram way more before tumblr#so I didn’t really think to read the tags on things until tumblr#anyways enough rambling haha
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Their sibling dynamic is so tragic to me
#frankenstein#victor frankenstein#elizabeth lavenza#he shared his studies with her she gossiped to him they’re so silly#but uuhgggghghghhh#the fact that they’ve never really been allowed the opportunity to build an authentic relationship with each other because the second they#met their parents were already trying to decide their positions regarding each other#they make me so emotional I don’t never wanna hear ‘lmao Victor was in love with his cousin’ or ‘ugh why is Elizabeth so subservient’ or#‘Victor was nothing but an abusive misogynist’ ever again pls#doots#oh also ignore my ever changing art style#in my experimental phase rn#frankenstein or the modern prometheus
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One of the biggest arguments I’ve seen used by the Ob*d*l*s against Anidala, is that scene in the ROTS novel where Padmé says she could trust OW with the secret of the rebellion and was hesitant to tell Anakin and I just wanna say:
Padmé wasn't an idiot. She was an extremely intelligent and competent woman, perfectly able to understand that loving Anakin and thinking that he could be trusted with a certain politic-related matter were two very different things and reducing her choice regarding who to trust with an important political matter only on the basis of her feelings of romantic love diminishes her professionalism, and this is why I say y'all could never understand her.
Padmé didn’t have to "love" OW or even like him at all to know he was the perfect Jedi to ask for help in a secret political matter.
That's the point being made in the novel, she’s hit with the realization that Anakin in this particular moment could not be told this piece of info because of his relationship with Palpatine, and Padmé specifically mentions in the Junior ROTS novel that she didn't want to make Anakin “keep a secret” if he didn’t agree with their stance because it’d be “unfair.” So this also played a part in why Padmé didn’t think it best to inform Anakin about the Rebellion. It honestly had little to do with her actually lacking trust in him, and more to do with the circumstances she was in not allowing her to be open with her husband and her not wanting to make him choose between his wife and his “father figure.”
However, Padmé knows OW’s political ideas aren't tied to ONE particular person but to a philosophy, one which is closer to her own, at that point. None of this was ever meant to be hinted as “romantic” or even remotely insinuated as romantic. It’s strictly professional and even the tone of the scene makes that so abundantly clear.
All I’m saying is that, some of these proshippers are doing the most out here to try and prove their ship, like my loves? You forgot a very important thing called ✨ context ✨ and regardless of her rational thinking, Padmé still went out of her way to try and talk out all of this Rebellion secrecy stuff with Anakin when she confronted him in the scene where she asks if he ever thought they were “fighting on the wrong side.” Padmé didn’t trust OW in the same way she trusted Anakin (with her entire self and being) she had the level of trust and love for Anakin that was only meant for him.
Mixing up her unwavering faith in Anakin as her husband with her trust in OW’s devotion to duty as her comrade/ally is purposely deluding yourself, because the two aren’t the same and therefore can’t be compared. An example of this is: Padmé constantly putting more value to Anakin’s words over OW’s in the end of ROTS when he came to tell her of Anakin’s “crimes”. She completely disregarded what OW had claimed about her husband and instead made her way to where Anakin was herself, to ask him directly. Despite what the truth was, this is proof of her trusting Anakin unconditionally, and I didn’t even think I had to spell that out because it’s as clear as day.
In conclusion, Padmé didn’t trust OW more than Anakin, she just knew the circumstances she was in didn’t exactly make it easy for her to openly talk with her husband about these matters and that’s part of what played into the issues they had in ROTS, it’s exactly what Sidious wanted.
#star wars#anidala#anakin skywalker#padmé amidala#sw novels#revenge of the sith novelization#revenge of the sith junior novelization#avoiding tagging and using full character names because I don’t wanna attract those weirdos on my post#haters dni#anti ob****d*la#i’ve seen shippers claim that ow and padme would make a better couple simply because they both value duty and share some of the same ideals#even though padmé’s strong sense of duty doesn’t define her personal identity#she’s always wanted to leave behind her responsibilities to live a simple happy life with her husband#she stays out duty and care for peace and justice in the galaxy#which is actually a trait she shared with anakin not ow#anakin is loyal and dutiful because he cares about helping people and that’s padmé’s aim too#ow stays to help people because of his devotion to the jedi#that’s not the same#saying she’d be more compatible with ow is like the punchline of a bad joke#in every way padmé shares more in common with anakin when it comes to the core of her personality#and relationships aren’t built off sharing ideals mind you#it’s about connecting and sharing core values which is what anakin and padmé always had#there’s a reasons why padmé and ow argued a lot in wild space#padmé says the one thing her and ow can agree on is loving anakin otherwise their mindsets clash way too much#compatible? never in a million years.#padmé herself disagrees#and apart from the fact that canonically padmé never shows romantic interest in him#nor does the narrative include ow as one of padmé’s love interests…#holy god my tags deserve their own posts
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i haint watched the dang chibisode and idk if ill actually watch it with sound on sdfjk but i have a hurt feeling about them casually imbuing perry with speech for a one off gag because the idea that he needs to talk to communicate is fake. we had 4 seasons of wacky magic hijinks cartoon where perry never needed verbal speech to communicate. they couldve done this gag at any point in the show but they didn't, and the fact that they didn't felt significant. perry's muteness is such a core part of his character, to me, to the way i conceive of him/write him. i don't wanna overreact to a goofy little side cartoon (even tho i'm doing it anyway) but it's still the characters, and it still upsets me! ok that's it i've said my piece
#ill watch it at some point but despite my silence i have been like obsessively anxious about this cartoon#and pestered my friend to watch it for me sDFJKL#in a month this will have either ruined pnf for me forever or i'll have changed my mind and i like it actually its fine#for now anyway i have tons of comic sketches about perry's muteness that i no longer wanna finish and share...maybe someday but not now#i had a rly great day actually but now im falling asleep in bed tipsy and a little teary over this. cuz i love perry a lot he's#really special to me. i also got that star wars perry shirt in the mail today btw. and. it's such a good pj shirt#but back on topic#it sucks when an aspect of a character that is CORE to your appreciation of them becomes casually disregarded by the writers at some point#like im certainly not ever accepting an interpretation of perry like 'secretly hed really like to be able to talk' because its#never ever been communicated. like the idea that heinz wd prefer if perry was human. its just not in the show. the opposite is true in fact#so im left feeling stupid for caring about something that some writers(inc. dan) felt was unimportant. makes me not wanna continue my art#which sux cuz i like my comic ideas! id love to finish them. i hope i get over this.#i overreact to live-updating media when im fixated on it wh is why i prefer getting into dead fandoms haha#but they keep on bringing them back to life dont they...im never safe#it was funny me trying to explain to my friend why i efel so strongly about this meanwhile hes tried to explain why he feels so strongly ab#ut AYA and my stance on that episode has always just been “cute! its fine” lmao#@ dwampy you guys made the show that follows a specific rhythm and set of rules designed to appeal to obsessive autistic brained people ok#you invited my overreaction. unsheathes katana etc#ok im goint to sleep#meta
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Having a semi-niche object/aesthetic based interest is so funny. You’ll get into it when it’s pretty much just you and 10 other freaks and you’ll usually pretty easily find affordable stuff online to add to your collection, but the harder to find stuff is often largely lost to time.
But then the interest suddenly gets more attention and the harder to find stuff suddenly pops up as well as things you’ve never seen before, but now it’s gone in an instant, and much of the more accessible stuff starts becoming less common and more expensive. But it’ll still be juuuuust niche enough that there’s not enough interest to convince manufacturers to like, take advantage of it and make new stuff. And then after a few months to a year it dies out and goes back to normal. It’s a weird, weird balance.
Anyways shout out to the rise of Frutiger Aero and its sub-genre HelveticaAqua. I’m glad we’re holding hands.
#this is largely light hearted btw I love a little friendly competition#and I’ve discovered more new stuff than I have in months because of it!#but cmonnn guys if you’re gonna make obscure items sell out in an instant at least post a few glamour shots when you get it!!!#I wanna see!#WE wanna see!!!#I’m currently working on getting a better set up for photos I have a lottttt I’d like to share#bug’s rambles
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trying to not complain about the discrepancy between how much content fictional women and poc have vs the white dudes in every fucking fandom im in, because no one owes me fanart/fic and i can make shit myself, but holy fuck can any of you name a woman?
#despite this mentioning women specifically its actually inspired by the ao3 tag for lucy and the guy who waterboarded her having 500+ fics#while her with her canon black love interest has 36.....#yanno. in a way its still 'name a woman' because none of these writers see her as a full character with thoughts and feelings that#may not align with their own. shes a named y/n to 80% of the fandom instead of. oh i dunno. an interesting canon character#ugh#sorry that you wouldnt wanna kiss max but lucy is built different + dont care + she didnt ask + L#(unfortunately i am the one getting ratioed because lesbians with correct opinions suffer more than jesus)#AND ANOTHER THING!#her tag is literally (i fucking counted) over half just shipping content with the white guy. unusable without a blacklist i stg#its not enough that she has so much less content than him. she ALSO has to share half of hers as primarily focused on him#UGH.#im allowed to bitch a full novel in the tags because its my fucking post and you can reblog it without this commentary#im not even using full names so it wont show up in their tags. i dont have to further justify shit about fuck to anyone
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Someone killed my boss last night and he sent me this I'm so fired
god I can't wait to make this comic.
#not me making a prelaunch link so I can share it on art of them that I do and then immediately being like hm#feels kind of weird to link a comic that doesnt exist yet#HAHAHAHAH#theres just no pleasing me#oh well I'll stick to my guns. I thought about it a long time#and doing things that feel weird is kind of the name of the game when it comes to making art#we were legion#zagan#this is so funny to me#its like not even that funny but#I love him. idk I think because I know what the comic is gonna be like stuff like this is 1 million times funnier to me#he sucks so bad and it would suck to read if he were the only one in the comic but because luciel is also there#then its just funny. cause juxtaposition#I love luciel too but theyre less good for standalone drawings and memes without comic context#so my brains like erm... theres nothing there....#also my tags are bugging out when I type them on the ocmputer idk how to explain whats happening but its kind of annoying#jumping around all over the place. makes it hard to read while I'm typing them. its fine#if theres typos its cause somethings going weird with my computer#lately when I've opened firefox its just shaking all over the place#til I alt tab out of it and back to it. I have straight up no idea why#and my internet has been bugging out. the LAN connection keeps flickering and then going out...??#YES I switched the ethernet cable connecting the modem and the router NO I dont know whats going on#I dont wanna deaaaaaal wiiiithhh customer serviceeee its fine. I'll do it later if switching the coax cable doesnt help#uh. anyways none of that matters cause I can still make my fuckin comics babeyyy#as long as I've got my comics. I'm good. though it is annoying when I cant look up references or spelling of words cause I do that constant#but its fine!#love I can draw without internet I dont even notice when it goes out sometimes aughajkghagj#anyways I'm super excited about this comic and if you're intereted theres a presave link now so#yeay#I'll post places other than webtoon but I'm just doing webtoon early so TTA readers can switch over easier
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i would like to know more about hn talon's feathery ailment ... is it their demonic nature clashing with the angelic blood that is resulting in their worsening condition ? is there a reason why it is specifically feathers / bird-likeness as opposed to anything else ( i.e. would other demons undergo similar transformations if they also got contaminated with angel blood ) ? can you share more about how you envision the progression and prognosis ? will it kill them or will there be some sort of final stage of their transformation ( whether that's a bad thing because it only gets worse and worse , or a good thing because maybe now that it is complete , they won't be in as much pain and discomfort 🥺 ) ? is it at all affected by whatever they're doing / thinking / feeling / experiencing ( tamagotchi talon ... ) ? what do they do to manage their condition ? does it make them self-conscious or feel badly about their physical appearance ?
"-But it looks like the angels ain't done with you."
I don't recommend that anyone ingests angel blood (good thing that's a difficult thing to do these days) but I wouldn't want to definitively say how it works for anyone else either. and I think it makes sense if talon isn't too sure either, with not meeting anyone else in a similar predicament as they (yet... will get to this later) but say if it were another angel Talon had attacked and drank the blood of, I believe they would still be having similar symptoms, as angels are quite feathery beings (varus with his arm of feathers, irelia with her wings and other choicely placed feathers.) But the particular angel they stole from has had a specific impact on just how the blood has changed them.
The reason for their worsening condition is because the blood has a powerful influence, like an undiluted acid. And it is so dramatic of an change because this influence is the polar opposite to their demonic existence. The more that Talon fights against the changes, the less symbiotic the blood and their demonic nature melds, the more violent and painful the experience is for them. And without any interference either with understanding or other experiences, I see it as a bitter, drawn-out struggle. Just wallowing in fatalism until Talon is nothing more than an unrecognisable pile of bile, blood, and feathers that tore itself apart...
Fortunately for them, the more Talon interacts with their rotting world and the people (and creatures) also struggling in it, the more they will come to terms with their own potential, and reflect on how they can be something more than what they once were. Learning that they don't have to let their worst action define their existence. More than just accepting what they did, and putting in the effort to understand emotions and how to be an active part of life, will mean they are not stubbornly fighting against their affliction. This will increase the speed of it's progression, but also be far less painful of an experience since they won't be actively fighting against it. When Talon is unable to call upon any of their demonic abilities anymore, the physical changes of the affliction will be complete, but they will continue to learn and better themself in an attempt to make up for all the wrong and pain they have caused in their existence. I can picture this happening in two or three decades time, in which there is no longer any hellfire, brimstone or summoned weapons. Talon is no longer a demon, but maybe by then they'll also know if the powers that be would accept a malformed, inexperienced, makeshift samaritan as a stand-in. But that's a hopeful thought, thinking they'll live that long.
Going back to the symptoms of the affliction. Previously, Talon's form was one of shadow and brimstone, and they were able to phase in and out of being corporeal at will. Over time, this ability has been weakened - only able to vanish as a shadow for a moment at a time. Brimstone skin was made brittle until it fell away to soft flesh, hollow bone, and hair. Feathers have begun sprouting through this softer skin too, mostly across their left shoulder, arm and chest, but are beginning to sprout along their throat too. Talon used to pull them out by hand, but has forfeited the fight. Back to the left arm, a sort of carapace has begun to form over their left hand, along the thumb's metacarpal and back of the hand in layers of grey ash and weathered gold. This and the growth of the feathers is very similar to Varus' - the angel in which Talon killed and drunk the blood of - own feathers and angelic arm. But without any of the matching powers, it is a far less grand sight.
Although still considerably hot to the touch, Talon's core temperature has drastically lowered compared to the past. Whatever organs of malice and bile a demon has have made way for a growth in their chest, helping pump the foul angelic blood and pesky emotions around their body routinely, and push out more of their demonic essence every day, little by little. With this, it has already made their demonic powers incredibly weakened. Previously Talon also used to be able to disintegrate bodies with a slice of their hellish blades, but they just do not run hot enough anymore. The final physical symptom are their eyes. Once filled with hellfire, it is far more likely nowadays to see their extinguished, golden-brown irises instead. It is slightly controllable with their emotional state, or when using their powers though.
In other ways, the blood has made Talon far more empathetic, given them a conscience. Troubled with how their actions will effect others now, the suffering and cruelty of the world has become a pain all it's own. Dulling the delight in spreading fear and even disturbing the once simple exchange of souls, Talon is often contemplating their next course of action instead of only giving thought to their best interests. And how their previous, often violent actions, have caused so much.
The agony and illness of coughing up feathers and demonic bile leaves talon haggard and frail. Getting sleep and relaxation would help the most, but with their paranoia it is difficult for them to find places to fully lower their guard and properly rest. Talon's tried to get a room in the crossroad saloon before, but it's... never really worked out (Gragas doesn't let them). Hating and damning the ailment only makes it worse, since it's basically like trying to separate themself from something that has already been mixed in. Feathers get stuck in their many teeth, skin itches from keratin growing in. Fatigue and sensitivity to their own heartbeat. Talon tries their best to hide the majority of their symptoms. Their coughs and exhaustion are the most obvious.
For how the changed made by the affliction is making talon feel... I'm going to paraphrase from a previous message;
I say its dysmorphic but the more I think about it, it's also… having your health decline and your body changing along with it, at least with talons perspective right now since they're losing their demonic powers. dysphoric in the way that they're still holding on to the thought that this isn't what they're supposed to be, they're Supposed to be a being of shadow and hellfire not flesh and bone, let alone feathers and sympathy. so I want it to be much more about accepting that this is their body now moreso than finding a way to reverse the changes. That it's okay to change with age and wisdom as you open yourself up more to the world.
At this time, Talon misses being completely monstrous, of being frightening and having that implicit respect. They feel weaker than they really are because they continue to compare themself to the long-gone height of their power, and because their new physical changes make them feel vulnerable. Being constantly exhausted also doesn't help with any of this. Beyond this though, the only other thing they don't like about these changes is just that; it's different. The uncanny features still don't feel like that that's who they are, and there is this disconnect when others react to them, or comment on their looks.
poses I don't know, maybe Talon just needs some sort of big motivation to no longer see this affliction as a curse, but as an opportunity to be more than a demon that skulks in the shadows. And some encouragement that yes, that is in fact a good thing. Maybe like an ultimatum of some sorts.
#‡ ask#‡ the end is comin' for us all | high noon#windchaser#and talon tries to share nothing of any of this <3 keep it nice and secret#'maybe like an ultimatum or smth' the words of someone with three seasons and a musical retelling in their brain#i would like to think i answered everything. not concisely. but-#if you need clarification on anything or wanna know anything else lmk...#ive been wanting to draw up talons previous form(s?) for a while now#they call me the yapper because i be going ON AND ON AND ON#thank you for asking mars ! i love getting my thoughts and thinkings about things out there instead of just rotting away in my mind palace#i am not sure what to tag this as but if it makes anyone too uncomfortable lmk ill sort out a tag#long post /#body horror /#ask to tag /
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