#because i fucking suck
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I wish I could explode into a billion pieces
#my boss probably also wishes this#so they could hire someone who isnt disabled#they were excited about me because of my drive and interest in the animals but they got unlucky#because i fucking suck#and my body does#and my brain does#like im the fucking worst lmao#dl
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MWAH!
#if you're cold they're cold. Let them in#project sekai#pjsk#prsk#emu otori#proseka#tsukasa tenma#nene kusanagi#rui kamishiro#wxs#wonderlands x showtime#scopophobia#monitoring goes hard. had to get this outof my system#congrats deco27 for releasing a new song that sounds like a new song[TRAIN PASSES OVERHEAD]#Well my most esteemed oomfs have agreed with me so idc. his discography has been looking up since hao though. i like hao. ^_^#Hi everynyan i got my fucking wisdom teeth out last week i AUUUUGH. FUUUUUCK. MY LIFE#Its fjne. Its fine its whatever. Tch. Tch.#I;m feeling the end of semester crunch something crazy i also have a cosplay to make in less than 2 months i havent started#emunene revstar art keeps me going#I NEED TO POST STUFF TO BSKY FIRST BC I WRITE THE ALT TEXT THERE AND THEN GO OH FUCK I DIDNT PUT IT ON TMBLR OT TWT. And u cant fucking#edit alt text onto stupid tweets because that app fucking sucks. GOD DAMNIT
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This is petty fandom salt, BUT... I've been chewing on this phenomenon that I've been calling "Fandom's Darling". It is related to things like "Author's Darling" and "Mary Sue / Gary Stu" and "Protagonist Halo" and all that jazz, where one character gains a peculiar narrative weight in a story.
"Author's Darling" is when a writer has a favorite character, and the world and all other characters sort of get... warped to put the Darling in the spotlight. It's most noticeable in TV shows with multiple writers, when a character you personally like suddenly has their previous characterization destroyed to make another character look good somehow. Every other character might become weirdly incompetent. The Darling's feelings are treated as The Most Important Feelings in any given situation. The logic of the fictional world seems broken past suspension of disbelief in order to validate this one character's beliefs or skillset or some other fantasy. And so on.
"Fandom's Darling" is what I've been calling the pattern where a fandom essentially crowns a New Protagonist for their fanfiction stories (it's often a side character rather than the original protagonist, but it can also happen to protagonists). This character becomes the self-insert for all sorts of indulgent fantasies, gaining special powers or backstories, and/or becoming the focus of extreme whump, and/or hooking up with all the various hotties, starring in all sorts of tropey AUs, and so on. They're not always an obvious Mary Sue version of themselves, but the character's original personality and interpersonal relationships tend to get warped or dropped completely, and other characters tend to become a little flat around them. I call it "Fandom's Darling" because it's not just one self-indulgent fantasy fic (you do you! Have fun!) with characterization choices that I don't vibe with (I have neither the time nor the desire nor the authority to police anything, I am just venting), but rather a prolific mini-fandom of sorts revolving around this empty doll / fanon version of the chosen vessel character, so it becomes a little unavoidable.
I am salty about this (mildly frustrated) (imagine a soft sigh of disappointment before I just go do something else) because you are FUCKED if you actually liked the canonical version of this character and their interpersonal relationships. It's almost worse than liking an obscure character that no one cares about. There's about a thousand fics starring your fave, but maybe only about a dozen of them are actually rooted in any kind of recognisable canon.
#I didn't watch Teen Wolf but I know this happened to that Stiles character#I'm not active in any DC fandom but it looks like this happened to Tim Drake and to a lesser extent Dick and Jason#In prequels-era Star Wars it seems to be Obi-Wan; he's the spark/focus of this post here; bring back his flaws I like that he kind of sucks#sometimes a Fandom's Darling comes out of an Author's Darling! usually Fandom's are vessels to fuck the “hottest guy” available though#I will probably turn reblogs off if this spreads too far because I really don't care if people write Mary Sue fanfic; can't cast that stone#squinting at every “intersex” tag like Inigo Montoya: “I don't think that means what you think it means.”#honestly the fantasy intersex thing is a separate & more serious post; but the fandom usage is a red/yellow flag for me when searching#tossawary fandom#fandom's darling
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*has several debilitating disorders* idk maybe i'm just lazy
#cancelled my psychiatrist appt because i just couldn't get up and i felt i couldn't face her#she's probably mad with me now :/ she already talked to me about missing appointments but i just couldn't do it today#i fucking suck lol im disappointed in myself. my depression has gotten really bad lately which is all the more reason to talk to her but.#idk i've kind of given up also. i stopped therapy months ago. i dont think she was gonna really help me anyway tbh
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listening to This Year on repeat. going to bed please remember that we can make it through again. im going to bed before it's finally called but.. yeah
#blinkies#i dont even know what to fucking do about it but. to those freaking out about the election. we need to keep fucking pushing ok?#also i had to say gonna instead of going to in the last two because it wouldnt fit otherwise#us politics fucking suck#mika-posts
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It’s not that I don’t LIKE the Fandom Popular Pairings, it’s that I find the assumption that everyone ships them and the general all-consuming nature of said pairings to be kinda exhausting,
#the funny thing about me getting into pro////////seka is that i can FINALLY articulate this#because it somehow feels worse than in any other fandom I’ve been into#that said I’ve been thinking about this for a while#also hi. if you’re here to throw some ‘have some originality’ comment please don’t that’s not the fucking point.#it’s not ‘they suck because they’re unoriginal’ it’s ‘it’s very frustrating to feel mildly positive to neutral#about a ship everyone keeps shoving down your throat’#people can be like this with any and all ships. it’s just that the popular ones tend to have this attitude be totally inescapable
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More silly Luke Skysilverfoxwalker doodles
in my mind, almost nothing of the sequels is canon, but Luke is still grumpy and somewhat depressed, his dad tries to help tho
#star wars#luke skywalker#star wars sequel trilogy#anakin skywalker#my art#is a whole different thing in my mind like i gave rey and keylo a whole different personality and arc and#theyre like barely side characters in the background and the main guys are finn poe and rose#i love finn and rose so much#i might ship rose and rey though#ben 'what the hell is a kylo' solo skywalker#ben 'i actually suck so bad at the force i can barely lift a pencil and i couldnt ever be a jedi or even a sith if i tried' solo#rey isnt a palpatine... palpatine definitely is dead because what the fuck#force ghosts#sequels era
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I was fully dressed for the cold winter night in less than a few minutes. [Marius] put a black cape over my shoulders, and gave me gloves trimmed in miniver, and put a black velvet cap on my head. The shoes he chose were black leather boots, which he never wanted me to wear before. To him the ankles of the boys were beautiful, and he did not favor boots, though he did not mind if we wore them by day when he could not see. - THE VAMPIRE ARMAND
#iwtvedit#iwtv#interview with the vampire#armand#the vampire armand#did i have FUN making this gifset? no. did i feel compelled to because i can never unsee it? yes.#hey to whomstever made this costuming choice: what the fuck and also how dare you.#love 2 notice nauseating tiny details :)))))#is this a conscious choice armand is making? who knows. it sucks either way.#he doesn't dress like this in paris. just dubai.#marius die in a fire for real this time
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Ticklish
#My art#jizzie#lizzie ldshadowlady#ldshadowlady#ldshadowlady fanart#lizzie ldshadowlady fanart#Joel smallishbeans#smallishbeans#joel smallishbeans fanart#smallishbeans fanart#fun fact when I started this sketch it wasn’t intended to be Jizzie. Then it turned into them as I drew. They infest my brain#Anyways. Love them#I’ve got a couple alt versions of this if anyone wants to see them. They’re just a couple different backgrounds and some little hearts but-#-they’re cute. Maybe I’ll attach them in a rb#Anyways I’m SUUUUPER proud of their face shapes here- especially Joel’s- I feel like I got them to look really good and somewhat feel like-#-their real face shapes while still being simple. Which I feel is impressive for such a STUPID angle GODS t was a pain. Turned out great-#-but UGH pissed me off once or twice there#Might also post some sketch layers too. Mainly because Joel’s happy trail was lost in the final version and I’m mourning it#Idk though. We’ll see how I feel in the morning 👍#Also happy new years I guess#I fucking HATED drawing Joel’s foot btw toes fucking SUCK TO DRAW they’re a fuckin pain. Stupid shaped appendage fr#I AM however very happy with their clothes. The skirt shape. The belt loops and seam on the pants. OUGH i like drawing clothes#Hermitcraft#hermitcraft art#hermitcraft fanart#life series#empires smp#uhhhh those last ones are just for reach I guess it’s not server specific#life series fanart#trafficblr
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Oh my fucking days. I did not think I would have to spell this out for you morons.
TRANS PEOPLE ARE NOT REQUIRED TO STAY IN COUNTRIES THEY ARE UNSAFE IN 'TO BE ACTIVISTS'.
TRANS PEOPLE ARE NOT REQUIRED TO STAY IN COUNTRIES THEY ARE UNSAFE IN 'TO BE ACTIVISTS'.
It is NOT MY JOB to sacrifice myself and MY FUTURE to change shit in this country.
I WANT TO GET
OUT
#transandrophobia#trans discourse#ffs#westerners view people in the global south as humans#challenge impossible#Why the flying fuck#Would i want to STAY here??#FINE#I'm not a perfect person#suck my non-existent dick anon#genuinely#would YOU stay here?#Why dont YOU go sacrifice your future to come be an activist in a country where you're basically illegal huh?#why is it MY job#just because of where I was born
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it's cute that spotify thinks i'll let them price gouge me just for the "convenience" of their app
it's gonna take some work to update my old harddrive library of ripped mp3's with all the new songs i've found over the past 5 years of using spotify, but it'll be so worth having a working shuffle button and all the vocaloid and video game songs i want again (•̀ᴗ•́)و
#suck my nuts spotify#seriously you're gonna charge me $17/month to “keep the service great” when the service is already ass to begin with#why do you need to charge me more money for an app that's getting worse lmao#you can't even fucking shuffle properly#and at least with media player i won't randomly lose access to entire albums just because their contracts expired or w/e#neil young i'm coming home#queued
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The audacity of well established bands to only sell merch for their most recent album. You bastards, you fiends, your peak popularity was in 2007, sell me a tshirt with old album art for the love of god.
#my stuff#every band i like is fucking ALLERGIC to letting me represent their greatest hits#like im sorry starset but Transmissions was a royal flush#im sorry 3DG but OneX was a royal flush and Human's cover art FUCKED#my lords powerwolf please please please let me pay you 1 million dollar for Best of the Blessed tshirt just because it goes hard#breaking benjamin and trivium sell me literally ANY decent merch i SWEAR!!!!!!!!!#HOW is trivium not selling a shirt from the Sin and the Sentence#MISSED opportunity#emo#three days grace#<- tagging the boys specifically bc im fighting for my life to rep anything besides the Explosions album (sucked imo)
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They called it… they fucking called it
To those who were eligible to vote but refused cuz of Harris- well congratulations! That orange fucker won. Hope you’re happy. Also don’t start bitching when all of our rights starts to get taken away (reproductive rights, LGBTQ rights, etc.) we fucking warned you. We warned you that if you didn’t vote then trump was more likely to win. Also you pulling this stunt- isn’t gonna help Palestine. Y’all claim that you are pro Palestine but after this election- you just proved that you really don’t give a damn about them. So congrats!
#2024 election#presidential election#jumblr#lgbtq+#reproductive rights#to those who were eligible to vote#but didn’t because you didn’t like Harris#I hope that you are fucking happy#this is for you#pro palestine#anti Zionist#thank you to those who did not vote#you have now put a lot of people#especially me#in danger#y’all could have sucked it up and voted for her#guess what#I didn’t Harris either (for different reasons)#but I still voted for her
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do any other artists feel like. yeah you're a 'good artist' because you draw things that look nice, but like. TECHNICALLY? you're really not great
i really hate that i can recognise that yes, my art is good, but is it VARIED? is it dynamic?? is my anatomy good? is it full of texture and colour theory? do i know how to do This? can i do That? no, not really. and that's quite painful actually
#ramble#yes this is the artist's perspective bs and yes this is anxiety because it's 1am#and yes i'm forever learning and growing but also#aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.#drawing my little guys is fun but i am not good enough for the industry right now and that fucking sucks#i really feel like if i walked into a studio with my portfolio right now they would laugh at me#one of those days where i wish i'd done a more useful degree y'know#i'm going back through the phase where i don't know what i'm going to be anymore and it's scary#some days i really want to give it up and never draw again and do something worthwhile because i Know my life would be easier#and i hate that something i love so much makes me feel so hopeless#signs that i should go to bed ^^^^#i will resume my pity party tomorrow
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III
#my art#crunchchute art#postal#postal dude#postal 3#postal 3 dude#ourgh i hope i like this in the morning cause im exhausted#i see what else id redo but i cant work on this anymore id go on for hours n hours#again it looks odd on my second monitor. sucks. anyway#thinking about posting it to reddit too just to fuck with the haters but probably not#they dont deserve that#the angle is weird because i started with no bg and everything up in air then i was editing it to make him sit on the ground#so ignore the proportions
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okay, one more politics post for the night:
tonight, Trump is doing a rally in Latrobe, Pennsylvania. I'm watching clips of it thanks to this brave man on twitter posting through it; I call this man brave because for me, watching a Trump rally live and unfiltered feels like looking directly at a solar eclipse, if a solar eclipse was also kind of like a racist, demented relative making a toast at Thanksgiving. And there's Some Stuff coming out of Trump's face tonight. He's talking about deporting "gang members" (read: latinos) by invoking the Alien Enemies Act of 1798, the same Act that Roosevelt invoked to force Japanese-Americans and others into internment camps during WWII. He's saying that "[America] couldn't have an act like that now, because now everything's woke". He goes on to call out "woke generals" Mark Milley, a Catholic, highly-decorated army general and Trump's former Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff; and General Jim "Mad Dog" or "Chaos" Mattis, a career Marine and Trump's former Secretary of Defense. He also added a fun local detour to his stump speech sure to make the fine folks of Latrobe smile: an anecdote about Arnold Palmer impressing all the other golf pros in the showers with his incredible, absolutely enormous penis. Trump wants this audience to know Arnold Palmer's thang was Swangin'. "This is a guy that was all man."
and I had to pause while writing this post and come back, so he probably said a bunch more wild stuff after that that I don't even know about yet!
The point is. My point is. This guy cannot be allowed to be president again. Ideally, he can eventually be pushed as far away from any sort of power as possible; but first, we have to vote to stop him from becoming the president again. And by "we", I don't just mean registered Democrats (hello)-- I mean everyone, of any political persuasion, who is eligible to vote. The folks in Trump's audience tonight applauding as he praises Arnold Palmer's huge hog on live television are beyond help, so it's up to the rest of us.
#us politics#i had a whole part of this post begun about some strengths of the harris-walz campaign#but I took it out because I realized you know what?#at this point in the election I do not care how anyone else feels about the democrats or how much they think kamala sucks. If we can agree#that trump needs to Go and the way to accomplish that specific concrete goal#is to vote democrat just this one crucial time#then we are brothers and sisters and nonbinary comrades#let's fucking go
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