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beanlot · 1 month ago

Text

indecision

ellie wants you back, even though she ended the relationship.

wc: 2.1k (angst + smudge of fluff)

─── ⊱ ─── ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ ─── ⊰ ───

“just get it over with, please.” she exhales jaggedly, smell of rubbing alcohol poisoning your nose as you apply pressure onto her wound. she’d been shot with an arrow, one you’d had to snap to pull out of her, but it’s nothing she hasn’t handled before.

she didn’t squirm, or whine when you bandaged her up. she sat still and took it, clenching onto the old and tattered leather seat.

you’d dated ellie for a shaky and indulgent two years before. your relationship at first was it - it was her looking at you when she’d done something clumsy or funny in hopes to see you laugh, it was holding each other tightly after you’d gotten separated, it was her lips kissing at your skin fruitfully. you remember it so clear.

“mm. baby.. baby..” you hear her voice, low and groggy. you’ve woken her up, shuffling around endlessly for half an hour trying to sleep. “baby.. shh. relax.. relax with me, you’re fine.” her hand settles on your hip, and she’d bring you in closer, tatted arm ravelling around your stomach. she was so gentle, so guiding, so protecting. “shh.. i’m here. i’m here, my love..”

ellie felt bad for ending it, it was necessary. there were times where she’d refuse to communicate, you would lose your temper, and start yelling at each other. you’ve grown hard around the edges over the years, your skin is scarred and tormented. it’s not your fault.

“oh shut the fuck up, ellie!” you spat at her. truth is, your arguments brewed for a few weeks. it started with glares, sly comments and ignoring eachother until it erupted. “you always do this, speaking to me like you’re so much better just becau-“

“speaking to you like what? just because i don’t sit on my ass here all day whilst everyone else does the work?”

the best thing to do was to break up, for both of your sakes. you were fine with it at first, you knew it was for the fucking best. you were starting to despise eachother’s company; you knew you’d get over it. because just like the scars and torment weren’t your fault, ellie was often blinded by hatred and impulse, it’s how the world shaped her.

“you know what.. i think.. we should just.. stop.” ellie scoffs.

“stop what?”

“us. it’s not fucking working. i can’t stand you.”

but what you couldn’t get over was overhearing her speak with dina, flirty and sultry tones bouncing back and forth between them a week later. they’d slept together, not long after that breakup.

and here you are, a few months later, knelt in front of her to relieve her physical pain.

“thanks..” a quiet whisper left her as you shoved the materials back into your bag. you’re still on high alert, ellie says that you always are, it’s like walking on eggshells being in a room with you.

she watches as you keep your eyes on the windows, peering through the blinds, your pupils narrow like the scope of a sniper. she tries to lighten the mood, tries to relax you a little. “a year ago, you would’ve passed out.” she jokes, a breathy laugh leaving her. but you don’t laugh.

i think that’s also what ate away at ellie during the end of the relationship. you used to have fun, and live, and look forward to the next day. but you’re a different mind in the same shell she used to love, and part of her believes she’s accountable for not being there for you.

you hear her whisper, as you sink into the chair opposite her, your head leant back towards the ceiling. “you okay..?” her voice is cautious, but she knows what’s up, she’s not stupid.

“fine.” you state bluntly.

it’s silent. she feels hopeless. you’re so cold now. but on the bright side, at least she no longer has to listen to your words of kindness easing her through the pain.

“i’m sorry. for it.” you hear her. she’s darting her eyes around your body, the long scar under your jawline, the scratches on your wrist from trying to slice nettles out of the way. you try not to smile at her apology, because it’s pathetic. “it’s whatever.” you respond, your voice uninterested.

you feel sour thinking about it now, actually. you could’ve left her to those hunters, left her to infected, left her to bleed out and clean her wounds herself. “did you enjoy it?” you impulsively ask her, a saltiness to your tone that she was anticipating.

her stomach still drops though, and she can sense the eggshells cracking around her. “what?” she mutters, her eyes narrowing at you as you look at her. you used to look at her with delicacy, adoration, desire. but now your eyes are empty, glossed over; ellie could only describe it as you looking through people rather than actually looking at them.

“you know. sleeping with her that quickly, was she good? worth?”

it’s silent, and you’re both staring at eachother with challenging eyes of contempt. she gets it, understands your anger, yet she also can’t seem to wrap her head around your entitlement. “what are you sa-“

“scale of 1 to 10.”

“what the fuck are you saying?” ellie’s voice goes up a pitch. she wish she could stand up and grab your throat, try and knock some sense into you. but not only is the pain in her shin holding her back, it’s also the fact you’d hold up an ambiguous fight. “are you serious?” she leans forward in disbelief.

but when you don’t respond, your gaze unfaltering, she sighs.

“i don’t know.. like.. an eight, i guess..”

it was a rhetorical question, asshole.

you’re sure she answered it out of spite, and you feel internal rage. but you don’t let it show, you just nod with pursed lips. “i’m happy for you.” you state coldly. you wish you had the heart to just leave her here, take shimmer up north back to jackson, but you don’t.

it’s silent for a few minutes. she’s often glancing back at you, already regretting her answer. although it was a truthful answer, she should have kept her mouth shut. but the damage has already been done, she sees it honing on your face as you look elsewhere.

“i’m..” she starts, sighing. “i’m sorry.. that was fucked, it’s all fucked.” she shakes her head. you’d been forgiving and graceful enough to snap an arrow and pull it out her leg, bandage it up for her. and yet she sits here as if she uses that same arrow to pierce at your heartstrings, play you like an instrument, even if you act as if it’s not affecting you under your stoic mask.

“can you come here…

please..?”

you look at her, and her eyes are brimmed with vulnerability. you stay in your seat for quite some time, until you muster up the patience to approach her.

she feels you dip into the space beside her. she wants to reach out, touch your skin, marshmallow you up how she used to. but she knows she can’t, she has no right. “you don’t have to forgive me.. i just..” she whispers. “i wanna say i fucked it all up, for us. i know i did..”

you digest her words, your eyes darting around the ceiling in contemplation.

“i just don’t..” she pauses, her eyes ponder down to her thighs, and then down to her bandage that you had wrapped. she’s trying to word her next sentence without it sounding so morbid, but she cant. “i don’t wanna lose you one day, knowing you hated me.” she murmurs, waiting for an inkling of emotion on your face - anything, she’ll take anything - but it doesn’t come.

she’s dreamt about it. having you in her arms, choking on your own blood, using your last efforts just to spit out a malicious i hate you.

“i thought the.. whatever with dina would’ve got rid of you.” ellie squeezes her nose bridge, trying to explain in a way that doesn’t sound so bullshit. she doesn’t want to say that she had sex with her, even though that’s what it was. “i fucked her over too.. she didn’t do anything wrong, but she was.. just there.”

wow, you really are a scummy piece of shit, els.

she knows what you’re thinking when she looks over at you, your eyes nailing into her. “i know..” she whispers, and you notice her hand slowly raising, hesitant to graze your own. you flinch when she does this, and she notices your hand inching away from hers. “i know it sounds bad. because it is, it’s my fault.”

she looks down at your hand, her eyes desperate, pupils dilated when they look at you. “please let me..” her voice is tender, affectionate with you. you’re invested in it slightly, letting her nails run along your palm, her touch a wintry feather tickling your skin.

“i just.. i’ll do anything. anything to make it up to you, no matter how long it takes.” she whispers, and you feel her touch leaving your hand. you feel like ice when it does, only to feel piping hot again when she cups your cheek. it’s intimate, but it’s genuine: it’s regret and sorrow, self-hatred and adoration. “i just want you to know, that i know i’m a fucking asshole, i still am..”

“you make me sick.” your voice is piercing and cold towards her. but she understands your rage, and she takes it, absorbing it with accountability. “i needed you. and you fucking left me.”

ellie’s gaze is weak. she’s thinking of your pain, of your scar-covered back and tormented bruises. the ones she couldn’t be there to kiss and treat. when you had came back from torrington after a few weeks’ travel, and she had heard from maria that you were ‘all kinds of fucked up’ and ‘in need of stitches’ under the jaw, she’d dissociated for hours in her room.

she could’ve been there, could’ve helped stop the bleeding, could’ve killed the bastards who had done it to you. prevented it in the first place. you were always there for every tear that dropped from her pretty eyes, every injury, every nightmare. and yet you did it all alone.

“i know.. i know.” she whispers, and you close your eyes when you feel her forehead press against yours. it’s not romantic, it’s just impulse. she wants to just feel close with you again, absorb your warmth, feel the safe haven she neglected and left to rot. “i’ll do anything. you have no idea. anything, i’m begging you.”

you can feel her breath, she’s so close to you, so hurt. she knows she has so many - too many - amendments to make for you.

“i almost died yesterday.”

her whisper is faint, and her eyes are focused on everything, yet nothing at the same time. glossed over in daydream, inanimate and empty. “we were.. i don’t know, going down the southeast, by those cabins..” she tries to recall, memories blurred with the overwhelming poison of your ill feelings towards her. “this guy.. i was just on the floor suddenly, and he’s coming down at me with an axe.

and if it wasn’t for jesse, i would’ve..” she continued, pausing before her eyes glint. “but in my last fucking moments, all i could see was your face. and i just.. i didn’t feel fear, i just.. felt so much regret. and, love. worried about what would happen to you after.”

her words were reluctant at first, but came streamlining out of her mouth when she’s reminded of each emotion that came with having her back against the mud, life flashing between her eyes, the split-second images of your pretty face next to the fireplace. the way you called her name, ellie, so vanilla. so clean. so smooth.

“i felt like.. i just should’ve told you everything, talked it out. i don’t want you to feel bad for me. i’m just.. i am begging you..” she repeats, a faint and delicate whisper against your lips. “if you want me to disappear, i’ll go. i’ll never bother you, you’ll never see me again in that fucking town..”

something about that proposal doesn’t sit right with your heart, or your head. you can’t tell. a part of you wants to slap the shit out of her, and another part wants to kiss at those lips - not out of love, but out of hateful lust.

“but please.. give me a chance to fix it.”

you sluggishly and reluctantly pull away from her, and watch as her gaze softens into disappointment. “i should.. go check on shimmer.” you whisper, rising to your feet, emotionally warped. “you just.. sit here and rest..”

as you start walking backwards and turn away from her, you can just hear all the emotions inside screeching in your head. it’s loud, blinding, deafening; you know ellie experiences it too, the same voices that just get too much. maybe that’s what dina was to her, white noise to dilute them.

she wants to chase you back, grab your wrist and talk it out. but the throbbing tremors from her wounded leg force her to slump back down into the chair with a defeated sigh. she lets you go, just this time, not willingly.

#ellie williams x reader #ellie x reader #ellie williams #ellie williams fluff #ellie williams angst

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babeyun · 25 days ago

Text

out of my head ✮ l.hs [m]

✮ synopsis: years after your friendship with heeseung has begun crumbling, you ask him to be part of one of the biggest days of your life - your wedding day.

✮ genre: estranged best friends to ??? ; semi-unrequited lovers au ; angst ; fluff

✮ pairing: singer!lee heeseung x financial advisor!fem!reader ; sim jaeyun x reader

✮ word count: 10.4k (yikes...)

✮ rating: nc-17.

✮ warning(s): ...kissing? lol? a lot of hurt with no comfort, semi-unrequited lovers, wedding superstitions, mentions of having kids.

✮ playlist: off my face - justin bieber ; are we still friends? - tyler, the creator ; your eyes only - enhypen ; this is why i need you - jesse ruben.

✮ a/n: i'm a yapper sorry, but happiest birthday to heeseung <3 that's my pookie! i love u.

four months ago.

"you're getting married?"

you and heeseung had been best friends for nearly twenty years. the two of you met at a park during a winter storm, both of you having begged your mothers for a chance to go see the snow. a coincidence really, the two of you having somehow lived the same experience (one that heeseung was convinced was fate, while you just boiled it down to two four-year-old kids giving into the natural urge to plunge their grubby little fingers into cold, unforgiving snow.)

however, in the last few years, you'd grown apart.

you were freshly out of university, and heeseung had recently taken a job as a backup vocalist for one of the local entertainment companies. he'd been a singer his entire life, something you never allowed yourself to pick up because your mother had always taught you that safety nets were better. while heeseung openly explored his talents, eventually learning guitar and slowly, piano - you buried yourself in mathematical equations that made your brain hurt but forced yourself through it all because, after all, you needed a plan.

heeseung lived life on the edge. he didn't care if he had money, if he had belongings - life was more than that to him. he ventured out into the city with nothing but his headphones sometimes, not even so much as bothering to bring an umbrella if it looked like rain. "if i get soaked, i get soaked! life is more than staying inside with your head heavy from studying." he told you once, and you had just shaken your head.

"come on, y/n! don't you want to dance in the rain? don't you want to risk getting sick and having your mom make you that soup you really like? live a little, life is too short to waste away in our bedrooms." he tugged you out of your house that day, making you leave your phone behind as you trekked the entire city by foot, and once the rain did start falling, you were a mile from your house. "heeseung, i can't get sick! i have a presentation–"

"screw that presentation! live in the now!" he held you close as the rain pelted your backs, spinning you around as your laughter echoed in the neighborhood. "isn't this fun! aren't you enjoying this newfound freedom, no expectations? no logarithms, no polynomials!" he exclaimed, making you only laugh harder. "hee, i'm a finance major. that is fun for me!"

"and i'm a y/n major, i know you fucking hate math!" he giggled as he set you down, his fingers brushing your wet hair off your face. "i don't have things like you do, hee! i need a plan, i need something to fall back on. you work to make money to invest into yourself, you don't follow dreams!" you say as the two of you make the route back to your house, making him scoff.

"are you saying i'm wasting my time living the way i do?" he asked, a twang of hurt in his voice going unnoticed by you as you nodded. "i do. i think you are wasting your potential." your words pierced him, but he said nothing more as the two of you reached your mom's house. "see you later, hee."

"see you later."

that had happened three years ago. heeseung noticeably distanced himself after that day, limiting your hangouts to once a week instead of dropping by whenever he felt like it. soon, what were weekly hangouts became biweekly, before you were only meeting him for dinner on a random wednesday night in the middle of the month. you never asked so he never explained, and he simply assumed your silence on the subject meant that your puzzle of a life no longer had a need for a lee heeseung-shaped piece.

it pained him to think that you were outgrowing him.

heeseung was taking classes while working, having finally let your words get to him. you were right, in a way - he couldn't live his life on the edge forever, but the fact that you actually said that to him after constantly reassuring him that you believed in him was...unexpected, to say the least.

"she's just worried about you, hee." his older brother rattled, and heeseung shook his head. he had long told him about that day, and continued to try and decipher it for the years after. he didn’t really understand why it bothered him so much, but his only guess was the same — you had pretended to have an interest in his life, but yet, just like everyone else…

…you had no faith in him.

“yes, hee, i’m getting married! focus!” you tapped your pen on the notepad in front of you, the ice in your matcha long melted. heeseung was gripping his mug of hot chocolate for dear life, wondering where he missed the fact that you were even in a relationship to begin with. “i didn’t even know you had a boyfriend, forgive me for being curious.” he scoffs, making you roll your eyes.

“you would know if you answered any of my calls.” you say pointedly, making him groan. “okay, sorry i’ve been so absent from your life. what’s this guy’s name anyway?”

“sim jaeyun. you can call him jake.” you scribble something onto the notepad, before tearing it off and handing it to him. “this is his number, you’re going to have to talk to him at some point for what i’m about to ask you.”

your smile is mischievous, one that heeseung could never forget. it was engraved in his memory, it lit up his dreams and haunted his nightmares. the same smile he’s written endless lyrics about, the same smile he’s fallen in love with but refused to admit it.

“y/n, i haven’t seen you in six months. how can someone possibly gauge if a person is marriage material in such a short time?” he argues as he folds the scrap of yellow paper. you huff with a frustrated look on your face, “jaeyun and i have been seeing each other for a year! we made it official nine months ago, and we’ve been engaged for three months! i told you this already!”

“when the fuck did you even mention him!?” he groans, and you click your pen angrily.

"hee, if you hadn't been so focused on your own life, you'd be up to date with mine." grimacing, you reach into the knapsack you brought with you. pulling out a pink binder, you set it on the table, facing him. the paper sheet behind the vinyl reads the sims - may 2026.

he snorts inwardly, before you open the binder. "i know we haven't been as close as we'd like the past few years." you start, clearing your throat as he glances at you. you pull apart the binder rings, pulling out a folder as you continue to speak. "but, i know that you're still doing the singing thing, and i wanted to offer you a gig."

sliding the folder across to him, he glances down at it. it's thick with pieces of printer paper, lyrics typed neatly in times new roman. he recognizes the first song as he slips it out of the folder, his eyes scanning the sheet over and over.

"you want me to sing at your wedding?" he asks incredulously, and you take a sip of your watered down matcha. you press your lips together as you nod, staring at your fingers. "i showed jaeyun some clips of yours from a few of your other gigs, and he really liked it. this is our song, and we want you to sing it for our first dance." you tap the paper with your pen, and heeseung sighs.

"then why are we here alone? why isn't he here, showing face and asking me with you?" he accuses, and your frown is deep enough that he's sure you're about to throw your drink at him. "he's at work, if you must know. he's busy."

"and what does he work in that he can't come with his future wife to a measly two-hour lunch?" he taps his finger on the table, his eyes boring into yours, searching for any sign of the best friend he'd become estranged from. you weren't there.

"he's..." you bite your lip, staring at whatever was behind him in order not to meet his eyes. he looks at you pointedly, brows raised in expectation - a look he'd always hated from other people. you grimace before responding. "he's a singer, he's recording his album right now." heeseung blinks slowly, something you knew meant he was about to either get up and leave, or he was going to scold you once he processed the information. your best friend was nothing short of an open book, but as he looked down at the sheet in his hand and shook his head, you suddenly couldn't read him anymore.

"after all the shit you gave me." his tongue drips with poison before he shoves the sheet of paper back in the folder, tapping it with his hand before grimacing. "when is the wedding? do i have to be there for the whole thing?" his eyes are full of fire as he stares at you, and you can feel yourself shrink under his gaze. heeseung was rarely ever mad at you, even during these years of estrangement. you were never really on the receiving end of his anger, so you never handled it. "may second. you don't have to stay, if you don't want to. but i'd love for you to be there." your words are softer than you intended, and you can really feel the tug on the invisible string that ties the two of you together.

he nods, pressing his lips together as you watch his eyes brim with tears. "okay." he looks away as the first tear falls, wiping it away quickly before getting up. "just…send me the address when the time comes." he tucks the folder under his arm as he quickly walks away, trying not to let any more tears fall as he exits the cafe.

he can't help but hold everything in as he walks to his apartment, his mind spinning with potential thoughts. when did you get so far? how did he let you stray so deeply, and where did you even meet this guy? why didn't you tell him sooner? or did you, and he just blocked it out? he can't remember, no matter how hard he skims his memory. "fuck!" he screams as he slams his door shut, throwing the folder onto the table in the foyer.

he slides down the door, a sinking feeling taking over his stomach as he hits the cold tile. he can't help but sob into his hands, his shoulders shaking violently as he does. you're getting married and he missed the entire thing, he's missed the past year of your life and has no remorse in doing so. he only feels sorry now, now that he's realized he's too late.

april 30.

heeseung was increasingly stressed.

you had told him over text (because he wouldn't answer your calls) that he had to take the week off so he could participate in bonding activities with your fiancé's groomsmen. he'd been reluctant, and said he'd get there the thursday before the wedding, nothing sooner – making you upset. he didn't care, he wouldn't lie to himself – he felt betrayed that you were getting married to someone else. it was childish of him and he knew it, but as he aimlessly wandered jeju island alone – it only sank deeper into his bones that he had truly fucked up.

he didn't bother to bond with any of your bridesmaids, either – despite their starry eyes and warm smiles, he could only see the dread in your eyes, the twitch in your lower lip as you greeted your guests with your fiancé. he kept his hand on your lower back at all times, and heeseung wonders if jake knows that he did that in the past. heeseung wonders if jake knows that he held your hand as you both skipped through the sand on family vacations with your families, heeseung wonders if jake knows that he shared a bed with you on nights where thunderstorms would scare you out of your sleep and heeseung would run the three blocks to your house to comfort you.

heeseung wonders if jake knows that he was your first kiss, in the back of heeseung's '96 civic when you were both juniors in high school. heeseung wonders if jake knows that he is in love with you, and that he wasn't sure he'd ever be able to stop.

not that jake knowing any of this would matter, because come saturday night, you'd be out of his grasp forever. he would never place his hand on the small of your back to ease your nerves, he would never hold your hand, he would never share a bed with you. he would never kiss you again, and he'd rather never see you again if it were up to him.

but it wasn't, was it? "heeseung! you made it!"

heeseung turns to see park sunghoon walking towards him with his hand shielding his eyes from the sun. "oh shit, hey! i didn't think you and y/n kept in touch after high school, it's great to see you." heeseung greets him, and sunghoon snorts.

"we didn't, actually. jaeyun and i go way back." sunghoon nods. sunghoon had been a friend of the two of you, but it was hard to keep in touch due to his prominent ice skating career. he was always busy, and it was easier to cut ropes than continuously make promises to see each other only to fall short.

"i'm sorry i didn't reach out more." heeseung starts, but sunghoon shakes his head. "don't even worry about it! my life was too crazy to keep tabs on everybody." sunghoon shakes his head, and heeseung tilts his head at him. "was?" sunghoon shifts in the sand, picking his cuticles as he sighs. "i had to quit, i got injured pretty badly during the finale of my last competition. i won, though, so at least i went out with a bang." he shrugs, and heeseung can see the disappointment in his eyes before offering a hug. "i'm sorry, hoon. that really fucking sucks."

sunghoon rejects the hug with a shake of his head. "it's fine, i'm doing other things now. i work as a backup vocalist for jake, me and jay. oh, jay's here, too! have you seen him?" sunghoon gestures to the air, and heeseung offers a small smile before shaking his head. "haven't seen him yet. to be honest, i don't want to be here." heeseung's confession, if surprising, doesn't seem to faze sunghoon. instead, the younger boy nods. "i figured you wouldn't. you're singing for them, right? i heard through the grapevine." sunghoon smirks, and heeseung rolls his eyes before lightly punching his arm. "stop lying, you brat. you read it on the wedding program."

sunghoon gives him a soft pat on the back, before leaning closer. "she wasn't going to wait forever, heeseung." with a curt nod, sunghoon continues down the beach towards the resort, leaving heeseung with wide eyes and a heavy heart. what did he mean by that?

🟊 – 🟊 – 🟊 – 🟊 – 🟊 – 🟊 – 🟊 – 🟊 – 🟊 – 🟊 – 🟊 – 🟊 – 🟊 – 🟊 – 🟊 – 🟊

the night was heavy as the last of your guests straggled in, and your feet were swelling in your shoes from standing for so long. jake had offered to take over as you went up to your room to change them, and you were internally thanking him as you hobbled to the elevator.

only for you to arrive and see your best friend waiting there calmly, headphones over his ears as he softly nods along to whatever is playing. he looks up when the elevator finally opens, completely oblivious to your lingering presence behind him. it's only when you get in after him, feeling the shift of the elevator's floor, that he looks at you.

his eyes are unreadable as he skims them over your face, a soft tilt to his head before he presses button six, hand hovering over the button as he waits for you to speak. you put up five fingers, and he presses it carefully as the doors close. it's silent, and for the first time ever since you were four years old, heeseung feels like a stranger. a polite stranger that presses the elevator button for you, that has come all the way from seoul on a ferry to sing at his estranged best friend's wedding.

except he's not a stranger, and you're the estranged best friend getting married this weekend. you're the estranged best friend who lied about your fiancé being excited for him to sing your first dance song, and you're the estranged best friend who wants it to hurt him. you want it to hurt, seeing you dance with your soon-to-be husband all night, you want it to burn in his chest when the two of you kiss at the end of the aisle.

you want him to ache as badly as you did when he basically abandoned you for no good reason. you want him to stay up all night in tears like you did when he wouldn't answer your calls, you want him to rant passionately about you to whoever gets the privilege of being his girlfriend like you did to jake when the two of you first started dating, and you want him to ignore the questions of if you're in love with each other.

just like you did.

loving heeseung was a thing of the past. he was out of your heart and out of your head, for the most part. you only ever thought of him when you'd talk to jake about old high school stories, skipping over the parts where you and heeseung shared loving caresses that the two of you convinced yourselves were nothing more than platonic. it didn't matter now, though, because there was no piece shaped like you in heeseung's puzzling life anymore.

you love jake. he's your endgame, and you're glad to be marrying him.

"are you excited? big day soon." he says gently, and you can feel your stomach turn as he nudges you with his elbow. you nod, a small smile on your lips as you glance down at your engagement ring. jake had it custom made, a marquise diamond nestled onto a thick gold band. it was a little tight, but you promised yourself you'd get it resized after the wedding.

"very excited. are you nervous? about your performance, i mean?" you ask, genuine concern in your voice as he shakes his head. "just another gig, really. it's special to you, though, so i've been putting my all into the rehearsals." he itches his neck, a nervous tick you'd picked up on through the years. you nod, patting his shoulder gently. the conversation stops as the elevator does, the number five on the elevator's neon sign.

"my stop. i'll see you at the rehearsal dinner tomorrow, right? you need to be there." your eyes are pleading, and heeseung can't help but sigh. "i'll try."

the answer doesn't seem to satisfy you, but you nod anyway, turning on your heels to go to your room. the doors close, and he lets out a shaky breath. you're very excited to marry sim jaeyun in less than thirty-six hours. you're very excited to be mrs. sim, you're very excited to have your first dance with your husband to the sound of your best friend's voice singing the song that reminds you and jake of your relationship.

a song that insinuates the two of you are unbelievably high off each other in every which way, and how ruined one of you has made the other for anybody else. but this song doesn't take into consideration how he is ruined for anyone else, how he is in pieces at the mere thought of you wearing white while meeting someone else down the aisle.

he doesn't want to feel like that anymore.

may 01.

"hey! you must be heeseung, i've been waiting forever to meet you!"

heeseung doesn't recognize the voice as he turns, eyes swollen with sleep when he looks to see you, and who he presumes to be sim jaeyun. he nods absently, before glancing at his cup of hot water. he'd stumbled down to the hotel's complimentary lounge, a packet of fennel mint tea in his hand.

"give me a moment, i'm sorry. i'm barely here." he apologizes sheepishly, tearing the bag open and dipping the bag into the cup. he wipes at his eyes once more, before turning to face a smiling jake. "you're jaeyun, right? nice to finally meet you man, y/n has said some awesome things about you."

lies. heeseung doesn't remember a single thing you have ever said about jake, just that he's a singer. but out of courtesy, and jake's business-like grip on his hand, he smiles through it anyway. "i heard that you asked for me specifically. your wedding song is beautiful." heeseung sees you wince out of the corner of his eye as jake looks a bit taken aback. he tilts his head slightly, but goes along with what heeseung now knows is a lie. "i'm glad you could make it. y/n talks a lot about your singing skills, are you working on any projects right now?" your face is pained as heeseung looks you dead in the eyes, "no, i'm just a backup vocalist. i gave up on that dream a while ago." he looks back at jake, who has a sad smile on his face. "the fame, the money…i was never suited for that life, anyway." "i'm sorry to hear that things didn't work out for you." jake sounds genuine, a flash of sadness in his eyes as he shakes heeseung's hand again. "i hope to see you at the rehearsal tonight. have you got a girlfriend? there'll be quite a few people at our singles' table." jake wiggles his brows and heeseung wonders when you're going to speak.

"actually, heeseung won't be able to stay. he's got another gig on sunday." you lie, and jake's eyes widen. "oh, you'll be missing our reception?" "i'll be leaving right after your dance, i do sincerely apologize." heeseung gives jake a sheepish grin, to which jake nods slowly. "that's unfortunate, there's a lot of people you could network with here! take advantage of it, dreams are meant to become reality." jake finalizes, before giving heeseung another warm smile.

"i will do my best! thank you for having me." heeseung says, and you can feel the fake tone of happiness in his voice seep into your bones. you'd been the only person to ever recognize it, and heeseung knows you're aware he used it as he takes the tea bag out of his mug. "i will see you both tonight."

he spins on his heel as he hears jake whisper to you.

"you asked him to sing our song? when? why didn't you tell me?" "we can talk about this later, okay? he's really good, i promise."

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your mother had been staring at heeseung for the last fifteen minutes, and heeseung was almost sure she was trying to figure out if he was who she thought he was. he gave her a small smile and waved, and the moment her eyes lit up, the person in front of her turned.

jake. he frowns as she walks away from him mid-conversation, stumbling over only moments before the rehearsal dinner is set to start.

"sorry, sweetie. i didn't know you and my y/n finally made up! it's so good to see you!" her embrace is crushing, and heeseung doesn't have the heart to tell your mother that you're a horrible liar. you hadn't 'made up' – he was simply doing you a favor, something else you'd lied about. he just smiles as she pulls back, ruffling his hair gently. "love the red, it really suits you." "thank you, auntie. it's nice to see you again." he remains relaxed as he sees her eyes soften. "what's wrong? not ready to see your little girl walk down the aisle?" he teases, and the older woman sighs inwardly. she turns, her shoulder brushing his as they stare into the room full of tipsy bridesmaids and boisterous groomsmen. "if i admit something to you, you'll keep it quiet, right?" she murmurs, and heeseung suddenly feels like this conversation isn't going to be one that favors his unruly feelings for you. "of course, auntie. who am i to tell?" "i always thought you'd be the one to marry my y/n." she sighs, clasping her hands in front of her as her eyes watch jake speaking to you gently as he hands you a glass of wine. heeseung's eyes follow hers and the two of them can see as your face falls and jake quickly moves to hide you from any lingering gazes. "i should go see what's wrong. it's nice to see you, heeseung. please enjoy the wedding!" he nods as your mother quickly crosses the room, her arm around you as jake gets pushed to entertain the guests while you get taken care of. jake looks nervous, and heeseung can't seem to stop his body as he also crosses the room, a small smile on his face. "good evening, jake." "oh, hey! how are you liking the venue so far?" a small flash of relief passes onto his face, and heeseung feels guilty as he shrugs. "it's what i expected for someone like y/n. so floral, so bright. are you sure you had any part in this?" he snickers, and jake laughs genuinely.

"she wouldn't let me even look at the flowers with her. babe, you're going to pick the wrong ones!" he imitates you, and heeseung shakes his head in amusement. you'd always been a bit of a control freak when it came to your visions, and now that your life revolved around financial decisions, you were wound up extra tight. "yeah, she's always been like that." he sighs, and jake doesn't miss the slight tone of sadness.

"listen, i don't know you very well," jake starts, reaching for a bottle of cabernet across the table. he grabs two glasses, uncorking the wine as he leans to pour. "but i want to say thank you." he holds the wine out to heeseung, and he tries not to look curious as he takes it.

"thank you for what?" heeseung asks, and jake gives him a pointed look as he blindly pours his own glass.

"for taking care of y/n all these years. i know you and i probably won't be the best of friends, i'm the first to admit that i'm not very good at sharing her attention." jake grimaces to himself as he replaces the cork into the bottle. "but i'm glad that she has someone as reliable as you, that can just… be there for her. it's a beautiful thing, your friendship."

heeseung almost feels nauseous as jake continues talking about how sweet your lifelong friendship with him seems. it just confirms that you told jake everything and anything you could about it, and based on his mention of jealousy, that includes the first kiss you shared. he can barely hear jake over the sound of his heart beating in his ears, but understands enough when jake pats his shoulder.

"...and i figured i'd be honest. y/n didn't say anything about you singing our song, we had originally planned for sunghoon to sing it with the band we hired. i guess she thought you'd be better for it, and i trust her judgment." jake says, pulling heeseung back in. "oh, i'm sorry." "don't even worry about it, man. hey, why don't you just relax, enjoy the dinner tonight. tomorrow is going to hit us like a fucking train, we should be well rested today." jake nods, and heeseung reciprocates with a gentle smile as someone else calls for jake's attention. "remember, just chill! network!" jake gestures to the room as he walks backwards towards the people looking for him.

heeseung can't shake the nausea from his throat, setting down the glass of wine to wander to the bathroom. but, the hall seems to get longer and longer, the temperature changing from the cold air conditioning to the humid spring air. he can feel a breeze in his hair, and then he realizes he's on the beach. his feet are buried in the warm sand, shoes in his hand.

sighing, he reminds himself he can't zone out like that all the time. it's not healthy, you had told him once. what if you end up in the middle of nowhere?

he reaches into his pocket, pulled out his spare headphones. he was supposed to bond with everyone at your stupid rehearsal dinner, but he didn't care to do so as he stared at the crashing waves. plugging the headphones into his phone, he gently speaks to siri as he lays on his back, looking up at the cloudless sky.

"hey, siri. play are we still friends? by tyler, the creator."

he stares into the water as the song pours into his ears. he doesn't know where things went to shit, but he knows it's his fault. he should've told you that what you said hurt his feelings. he should have communicated, then maybe it'd be him sitting next you in the private jet your mother rented solely for your honeymoon escape after the reception.

maybe it'd be him spinning you around in your beautiful wedding dress, and whispering sweet nothings in your ear as you dance the night away. maybe it would be him, like your mom had hoped. maybe it would be him, like he had hoped, too.

his fingers dig into the sand as he swallows the lump in his throat. there is nothing in hell, heaven or earth that would stop you from trekking the aisle tomorrow afternoon. nothing would stop jake from kissing you tenderly right in front of him, and doing it for the rest of your lives. it would taunt him, it would haunt him like the ghost of your friendship. you weren't friends anymore, the two of you knew it. things would never be the same between you, and yet, neither of you was brave enough to ask the question.

why?

"heeseung! are you out here?!" he can hear sunghoon's voice over the fourth replay of the song, lowering the volume as he tilts his head to find him. "over here, what's up?" "what's up? they're waiting for you, man!" sunghoon is standing in the doorway of the resort, the soft breeze blowing his hair back as a bridesmaid also peers over his shoulder. heeseung sighs as he stands, wiping his pants of sand and shoving his phone into his pocket. he walks quickly, humming quietly to himself to semi-prepare his voice for the perfect delivery of the song you wanted him to sing.

everyone is chatting quietly around the tables as heeseung steps inside, running his fingers through his hair as he walks forward. your mother catches his eye, a concerned look on her face, but he can't hold eye contact. he faces the floor as he reaches the small stage the venue has set up for the band, jay perched on a stool holding a guitar.

"hey, hee. you ready?" he asks as he tucks in his in-ear monitor, and heeseung shrugs as he takes his place behind the microphone. only then does he notice that the chatter he heard was just two bridesmaids, kim sunoo, riki nishimura and yang jungwon – all friends of yours and jake's that he hadn't bothered to meet further than reading their names in the program.

he watches silently as you and jake take the center of the dance floor, your eyes slightly reddened as you gingerly drape your arms over your fiancé. your smile doesn't fill your cheeks as jay begins playing softly.

heeseung takes a deep breath, and your eyes catch him as he begins to sing.

one touch, and you've got me stoned. higher than i've ever known…

you were both thirteen.

he remembers the way you held onto him the night that you lost your first mathletes competition. you cried so hard that you'd almost thrown up, and heeseung could only soothe you by dragging you to the nearest convenience store and shoving a melona popsicle in your hand. you went silent after that, gripping his hand tightly as he walked you home. you'd squeezed his hand three times that night, something he'd always done but you'd roll your eyes at.

"why would i squeeze your hand when i can just tell you, hee?"

you call the shots and i'll follow. sunrise, but the night's still young…

you were both seventeen.

he remembers when you called him to come over while it was storming, because your mother was out of town. your house was a little over a mile away and normally, he didn't mind the walk. it was almost three in the morning, and he'd been sleeping when your ringtone went off for the third time. "hello?" "hee, please come over. it's storming so bad, i'm so–"

he hadn't even let you finish before ripping his bedsheets off his body and sprinting for the door. his clothes, his shoes, everything was soaking wet by the time he got to your house. you'd embraced him anyway, your own clothes soaking through as he trudged into your home – only for the storm to stop a few moments after his arrival.

no words, but we're speaking tongues. if you let me, i might say too much…

you were both twenty.

he remembers when you asked him, in the middle of your kitchen during your graduation party, if he could kiss you. the house was empty except for the two of you – his parents and your mom had decided to throw a joint party, using the excuse that two best friends should always stick together. your mom had sent you inside for more hor d'oeuvres, and you'd dragged him inside with the excuse that you couldn't carry them all yourself.

"you don't have to, hee. i'm sorry." your eyes were full of embarrassment as heeseung stared at you, a bit in shock at your question. only as you begin to move further into the kitchen does he register what you've said, and grabs your arm, pulling you toward him. "ask me again, i'm sorry. i zoned out, i thought you asked me to kiss you."

"i did." you repeated quietly, and heeseung blinked twice before nodding. "o-okay. yeah, i can do that." he cleared his throat, looking over your shoulder into the foyer to ensure no one was opening the door.

"are you sure? i mean, it's your first kiss, wouldn't you want to have it with someone special?" he's rambling, and your gentle laugh pulls him right back.

"you are special, hee."

without another word, he backed you up against your kitchen counter, his hands on your hips as he softly kissed you. your hands were on his biceps, and he could feel your nervousness seep through your locked lips. he carefully circles your thighs to lift you onto the counter, your arms instinctively wrapping around his neck before he breaks the kiss.

"how was that? okay?" his eyes searched yours, a shy smile playing on his swollen lips as you blinked. "uh, i'm not sure. i think–" "you want to try again?" his head tilted to the side, a habit you loved and eventually also caught. you nodded silently. his smile was wide as he closed the gap between the two of you, the hands on your thighs squeezing softly. once, twice, three times.

i love you.

your touch blurred my vision. it's your world, and i'm just in it…

you're both twenty one.

he remembers how he stared at his bedroom ceiling, clothes soaked in rain from prancing around the city with you. how piercing your words were, how he thought for so long that you believed in him. how all of these events he can't stop thinking about, are about you. how proud he was of you, how lucky he was to have you, how insane it was that you wanted him. you wanted him at one point.

how he didn't care that he got sick, but certainly didn't understand why your sore throat and stuffy nose didn't make him feel a pang of distress. how he didn't care that no one else was refuting his talent, because they weren't you. he didn't care about anyone else in this world, but you.

even sober, i'm not thinking straight…

you're both twenty two.

he remembers his birthday going abhorrently wrong. you weren't there, per usual – you were too wrapped up with school to give heeseung a second thought. he'd long realized that he didn't want to lose you, but it seemed that you no longer cared to keep the friendship alive. he still has the messages he sent you, and is still amazed at the lack of typos despite being absolutely shitfaced.

message to: my y/n <3 [2022.10.15 | 11:23pm] it's my birthday, baby. [2022.10.15 | 11:24pm] you can't be here for me today? [2022.10.15 | 11:24pm] i miss you. i miss our friendship. [2022.10.15 | 11:26pm] i can't believe you're missing my birthday. i never miss your birthdays. [2022.10.15 | 11:30pm] is this it? are we done? [2022.10.15 | 11:34pm] when will you come back to me? when, how much longer? [2022.10.15 | 11:35pm] when you graduate? i can wait. (not delivered!) [2022.10.15 | 11:47pm] just tell me how long. i'll wait. (not delivered!)[2022.10.16 | 12:02am] i'd wait forever for you (not delivered!)

he changed his number after that. he still doesn't know how you got his new one. he doesn't care to ask, either.

cause i'm off my face, in love with you…

you're both twenty five.

he's watching you slow dance with your fiancé, fingers interlaced behind his neck as jake's hands rest on your hips. he hates the jealousy that boils in his stomach, but doesn't bother to break eye contact with the tile on the ceiling with water damage.

i'm out my head, so into you…

he can feel his fingers tightening around the microphone stand, but can't seem to stop his eyes from averting as jake spins you gently, before your soft giggle hits his ears. you look up at jake with what he can only assume is adoration, before resting your cheek on his shoulder. you're looking right at heeseung, mouthing along to the song.

and i don't know how you do it…

you're fixing your posture instead, still staring at heeseung as jake takes your hand in his, kissing your knuckles. you instinctively smile at the feeling, and heeseung's eyes zero in on your fingers as you squeeze jake's hand.

once, twice, three times. i love you.

but i'm forever ruined by you, ooh, ooh, ooh.

"i love you." your eyes haven't left heeseung as you whisper the words, and you can see the way his eyes fill with fire as he looks away. you get a twisted feeling of satisfaction in your gut, before finally averting your eyes back to your fiancé. jake is smiling softly at you, and you quickly close the gap between you as heeseung continues to sing. your lips press against jake's smoothly, before he swiftly moves away. "i can't wait to marry you tomorrow." he whispers.

"me, too."

liar.

may 02.

the wedding is in twenty minutes.

your pantyhose has ripped, you tripped going up the stairs. you're not even wearing your dress yet. there are storm clouds gathering, and you can’t help but feel like everything in the universe is working against you. the only thing holding you together is your mother, her arms are wrapped tightly around you.

“are you sure we can’t just run away and elope?” you mumble into her shoulder, and your mother laughs. “not anymore. but,” she pulls away from you, cradling your face in her hands gently. “i love you, honey. everything will be okay.”

you hate the churn in your stomach at the word everything. because if everything were okay, it'd be sunny. if everything were okay, you'd be staring down an aisle full of people and only see heeseung at the end of it. if everything were okay, you would've never said yes to that first date.

“i love you.” you repeat, your hand resting on her wrists as you nod robotically. “i’ll see you out there, okay?”

“okay.” you breathe out shakily as she presses her lips to your hairline, lingering slightly before pulling away and leaving your room. you were alone now, and you glanced out the window at all the guests gathering on the beach. everyone is dressed so brightly, bunches of pinks and lilacs scattered across the sand. jake is waiting patiently at the end of the aisle, the forest green of his suit making his skin glow slightly brighter. how he does it, you don't know.

and then you see heeseung.

he’s dressed in black, despite the theme of the wedding being floral and natural. you grimace, forcing yourself to look away before spotting your dress hanging on the back of the door. you'd have to shimmy into it on your own, having sent everyone out in a fit of anxiety.

sighing, you unhook the heavy dress from the door, carefully letting the skirt pool on the floor as you step into it. it slides on perfectly, and you can't help but lose your breath at the sudden weight of the world on your chest. you're getting married, and you love jake.

but he'll never, ever be heeseung.

"tighten up, y/n. you've got this." you shake your head, reaching back and forcing the zipper up as high as you could. you had a hook-and-eye closure at the top, something you'd simply have to forego if you wanted to make it downstairs on time. groaning to yourself, you attempt to pull up the zipper just a bit more, before giving up and covering it with your veil. grabbing your bouquet, you give yourself a final glance in the mirror.

"you've got this. everything will be okay."

your voice is shaky, but you swing your room door open anyway – only to be met with heeseung on the other side. his eyes widen, mouth slightly agape as you come into his view. "wow, you look…" "what are you doing here? you're supposed to be downstairs." you scold, shoving your keycard into the pocket of your dress. oh yeah, you've got it like that. "your mom asked me to come see what was taking so long. i told her you'd be down soon, but she insisted." he shrugs, so nonchalantly.

like none of this is eating away at him.

"ugh, whatever. come on." your tone is angry, but your face shows nothing but fear. his eyes follow as you storm towards the elevator, seeing the zipper of your dress slowly sliding down as you reach the doors. "here, hold on."

his fingers move your veil carefully as you step into the elevator, before pulling the fabric tighter together and pulling the zipper to the top. he carefully clasps the closure, and you swear you feel every hair on your body sticking up when his fingertips gently graze your back. "don't touch me, heeseung."

"i'm trying to help you. otherwise, you'd flash that entire crowd." he scoffs, pressing the floor button. you sigh, wrapping your arms around yourself as the elevator becomes silent. the tension is thick between you, you know it. your eyes never leave the neon sign, watching the floor numbers go by before heeseung reaches over and pulls the emergency lever.

"what the fuck are you doing?! i'm already late!" you gasp, hitting his arm with your bouquet when he stands in front of the lever. "i can't let you do this unless you hear what i have to say."

"heeseung, i'm getting married. this is the biggest day of my life–" your whining is cut short by his hand on your mouth, and only then do you see the unshed tears in his eyes. "the biggest day of my life was when i met you on that stupid playground. i never, ever in my life thought our friendship would end this way, and you know what, it makes me kind of sick."

he breathes deeply, removing his hand from your face as he sees the shock in your eyes. "you're saying you're already late to your big day, well i just want to say i beat you in that department. i've never had a problem with punctuality, but i really missed the mark on this one." his chuckle is dry, humorless as he looks at the bouquet in your hand. "i don't think i'll get over this, ever. i'll never get the chance to be in his place. but," he steps back, fingers gripping the emergency lever in his hand.

"i want you to know that it should be me. i should be the one waiting for you at the end of the aisle. i should be the one who gets to love you until the end of my days, and even then, you'd never die. you'd be loved by me forever, the evidence strewn all over the world in compositions and lyrics. i would never let you die."

he pushes the lever back, before moving back to his original spot next to you. the elevator doors open, revealing an empty lobby. the storm clouds are no longer that far away, and you can feel the humidity through the open plan of the resort.

"i am foolishly, hopelessly, irrevocably in love with you. and i hope you realize this is the biggest mistake of your life." his voice is soft, as is his smile when he offers his hand. "here's to your forever, my love."

you say nothing.

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if heeseung was anything, it was a sick bastard. a sick, rat bastard who had no shame. your mother took you from his arm at the end of the aisle, and you didn't even realize you'd allowed him to lead you there. jake's eyes shone with what could only be identified as jealousy.

he smiled the entire ceremony, clapping and whistling alongside your other guests through the vows. the sappy vows jake had penned were poetic compared to yours, but he knew what you meant anyway. you felt several fat raindrops plop onto your head and shoulders, while heeseung had come prepared and shared his umbrella with your mother.

he even helped her inside once the rain really started pouring, just after your first kiss as a married couple. your stomach was boiling over in fury as you watched him laugh with her, his eyes only meeting yours once with a soft smile.

you and jake slipped away to change into your reception clothing, his suit jacket abandoned and sleeves rolled up, showing off the watch you got him for his birthday. your ballroom white dress, now stained with sand, was traded in for an a-line style. jake met you in front of the resort, his fingers curled in yours when he finally spoke.

"we really did it, huh." he says quietly, his eyes scanning the shut doors of the reception venue. you nod, your breath caught in your throat when he takes a step back, his hand squeezing yours. "two years." your ears twitch at this. "what?" "all i ask for is two years. we can have a kid. we'll have an heir to our wills. we can get divorced after two years, and you can be with him." he breathes, eyes following the pattern on the heavy wooden door. you choke out a scoff of disbelief, your throat burning. "what the fuck are you talking about, jaeyun?" he winces at the use of his name, so used to gentle baby and sweetened honey. a sigh escapes his lips as he turns to face you. "i know you love him, y/n. you don't have to hide it from me. you wouldn't have brought him all the way out here, you wouldn't have gone behind my back and changed the plans for the band. your mom loves him, for crying out loud. i never stood a chance." he chuckles sadly, and your tears are hot as they flow down your face.

"how can you say that, jaeyun? i'm married to you, i've chosen you, over anything and anyone in this world! how can you say such things?!" your hurt is evident, but he can't figure out if it's because of the little blame game or if it's because you truly, deeply love him. he doesn't know what to say, but reaches to wipe your tears. you jerk away, a frown etched on your glossed lips as you wipe them yourself. you take a deep breath, grabbing the door knob.

"fix your face." you mutter, a tone jake had never received from you as he sighed, painting a smile of everything's okay on his face as the two of you threw the doors open in unison. your crowd of guests cheered loudly, rice flying everywhere as they welcomed you in. the band was loudly playing got to be real by cheryl lynn, and you almost forget jake's painful words behind the door. you almost forget that heeseung will be queueing up to sing for you and your husband, for free, on the very stage you're now standing in front of.

jungwon hands you a microphone and two champagne flutes, before slinking away to his seat. you hand one to jake, who swirls it nervously.

"wow, it's such an honor to have all of our loved ones here today." your voice is shaky as you take them all in, dozens of eyes staring you down. "i mean, i've waited for this day since i was a little girl. it's a blessing to finally see it in color, in person. thank you." jake breathes in deeply, before looking away to blink back tears. "i'm not crying, my eyes are just sweating." he speaks into the microphone, earning an empathetic laugh from the guests, your hand ghosts over his back, and he stiffens at it. "i'm so…so terribly in love with y/n. i can't believe this day is real." a soft aww echoes in the room, your chest tightening as you see heeseung sitting next to your mother. he's cooing with everyone else. "and i can't wait to be a man that is continuously worthy of her love. to y/n."

you almost burst into tears as everyone raises their drinks to you, the clink of glasses adding to the emotion as you and jake find your seats at the end of the hall. you sit gingerly, holding jake's hand under the table tightly. "i love you, jake." "i love you, y/n."

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the speeches were a mess. jay was a mess of tears, and minjeong spewed bullshit about the two of you being like sisters. heeseung hadn't met her until five minutes after the ceremony, and if you had been close to anyone enough to consider them a sibling, he'd know them. no one knew you like he did.

"and now, for the newlyweds' first dance! we have a very special guest singing for us today, please give a warm welcome and round of applause to y/n's longest friend, lee heeseung!"

he smiled nervously as he took the stage, a puffy-eyed jay sitting behind him as he tested the microphone. "thank you for having me, and congratulations to the newlyweds. y/n, i'm eternally proud of you and so grateful to be here on your special day. i love you." none of the guests know it means something more to him, to you, as they let out an aww. how heartwarming, that your lifelong best friend was here for you. how lovely, that he was supporting you every step of the way.

he sang carefully, watching as you and jake held each other tightly, swaying to the song. he can hear your sniffle, a soft sob into jake's shoulder as he lovingly strokes your back. he looks away.

it should be him.

it should be heeseung, that gets to see you wear white. it should be heeseung, that gets to plan a tedious wedding at your instruction. it should be heeseung that gets to take you on a romantic honeymoon and spend all day in the sun and all night glued to your bed. it should be heeseung that gets to shampoo your hair for you when you're feeling too tired, it should be heeseung that gets to watch you put lipstick on in the morning just to ruin it before you're out the door.

it should be him. and everyone knows it, no matter if they know your history or not.

"thank you, everyone. let's hear it for the newlyweds!"

october 15.

"hey."

it's been over a year since your wedding. you and jake had happily posted tons of wedding photos, piled over with honeymoon flicks. you and heeseung hadn't spoken since the wedding. he left right after the first dance, catching the first ferry back to seoul. he didn't bother contacting you to see if you'd made it back safely, he didn't bother to message you a happy birthday when it came around. he just didn't care.

he dropped out of college for the second time, and spent the summer going around seoul auditioning for companies. decelis entertainment finally gave him a break, and only after he got his contract did he find out that jake and all of his friends were also at this company.

he was polite in the hallways. he smiled, he waved, he engaged in small talk and perused the past. he didn't ask questions, he didn't initiate. he spent his time holed away in the studio with a producer named yeonjun, recording for hours on end without a break. he was set to debut in two weeks, having dropped his first teaser just two days prior.

all without you to cheer him on.

"what are you doing here?" his voice was cold, nothing you weren't used to at this point. his hair wasn't red anymore, now a natural chocolate brown. it suited him. "came to visit, heard from jake that you've been training for a year." "what's it to you?"

he's being harsh, he knows he's being harsh.

"hey, y/n. nice to see you." jake calls from across the hall, exiting his studio with jay and sunghoon in tow. the two of them seem to say nothing at the sudden casualties between you and jake, or the insinuation that he hadn't seen you in a while. heeseung gives you a glance, your hands holding a gift and a grocery bag. "may i come in?" "i'm busy, at the moment." he coughs, ignoring the way your eyes roll. "too busy for a slice of cake?" you hold up a bag in your fingers, and his eyes narrow. he leans back into the studio, his eyes scanning the calendar for any potential special dates. he's not even flipped to the right month, the calendar reading july.

"shit, did i miss something?" he whips out his phone, which you simply cover with your hand. a soft laugh escapes your lips as you lift your other hand, the gift bag screaming happy birthday in gold glitter flashing at him. "oh, man." he moves away from the door, allowing you to walk in. you look around, and although the studio doesn't belong to him, it sure smells like him. it looks like him, it's covered in him, it feels like home.

"happy birthday, hee." you say gently, setting the gift down on the couch and slowly sitting down to unwrap his cake. "i know it's not much, but i'm barely here." you chuckle, tapping your temple as he takes a seat in his desk chair. he's wary, you can tell.

"something on your mind?" "why are you here? i debut in two weeks, i don't need any bullshit." he rubs his temples, and you only frown. "you know, once upon a time, you would've been happy to have me here." your tone is pointed, and heeseung sighs. "fine, fine. i'm sorry."

"i'm the one who should be sorry." you murmur, and heeseung says nothing. he knows you're right.

you're both quiet, before heeseung notices the candle next to the cake. he rolls the chair over, his fingers carefully centering the candle. "have you got a light?"

you shake your head no, a sheepish look in your eyes. "i'm sorry. we can pretend, if that's okay?" he hates the way his lips twitch into a smile at your wide eyes. "yeah, we can pretend."

you sing for him softly, your cheek squished into your hand as you lean on the armrest. he closes his eyes, making a wish and blowing the makeshift flame out. "what'd you wish for?" you yawn, and he shakes his head.

"won't come true if i tell you." shrugging, he rolls back over to his desk, leaving the cake on the table. you just make a noise of agreement, before a sigh slips past you. "i heard your teaser, you know." he doesn't care to react, only giving you a short sound. "mhm?" "is it about me?" you ask, and he straightens in his chair before spinning around to face you. "all my songs are about you. every single one of them." he gestures to a tattered journal on the soundboard. it's covered in stickers, and…a taped photo of you and him as toddlers. "oh."

"i mean what i say, y/n." he rolls his eyes, before spinning back around. "if it were me, i'd never let you die."

but it is you, you think. it's always been you.

"why did jake say it was nice to see you?" he asks, too cowardly to look you in the eyes. he hears your sigh, before hearing you shift around on the couch. he spins around again, only to see you have removed your shoes and tucked your legs beneath you. his eyes scan you, before looking at your fingers. your ring is gone, replaced by a chunky painite stone in silver. your eyes are gently burning into him, and he shivers in the warmth. "well…why?" "before the reception, he told me he knew." you shrug, "he knew how you felt about me, and how i allegedly felt about you. he brought up my mother, and how he felt like he'd never stood a chance."

"but he did. you married him, after all." heeseung rolls his eyes as you shrug, blinking slowly as you speak again. "we gave it a good shot. maybe i should've listened to all those superstitions, they're not such bullshit. the tripping, the rain, god, the way my ring was too tight." you scoff sadly, before glancing back up at him.

he seems to understand. if he doesn't, he doesn't say anything. sighing, you reach over to rustle the gift bag with your fingers. "you've got to open this, you know."

"y/n, i can't do this." he breathes out, eyes screwed shut. "i can't sit here with you and pretend like we're all good, like you're not married to the same guy i share a company with. we stopped being friends a long time ago, what are you trying to do here?" "i'm not trying to do anything but reconnect. i fully accepted the fact that whether or not you're with me, you're still someone i love. i spent years trying to figure out why you drifted away from me, and then jake and i sat down at our dinner table a few weeks ago after meeting with the lawyer and he asked me about our friendship. so i told him everything, from the very beginning."

heeseung can't breathe as you get up, walking towards him and slowly sinking into a squat. your hands are on his knees, giving a gentle squeeze before you speak.

"i'm sorry i made it seem like i had no faith in you. i said horrible things to you, even if they seemed right to me, and i'm so sorry that it took someone else to tell me that i'd treated you so badly that day."

his eyes are brimming with tears, but he looks away from you. he can't cry, not now, not in front of you.

"you've always been like that, though." he murmurs, picking at his cuticles when you carefully take his hands in yours. he suppresses a sob as the warmth of you envelopes his fingers, "i was projecting. i thought that everyone had to be like me, that everyone had to have a plan. some people are just better at flying by the seat of their pants, i mean, look at all you've accomplished despite me saying such shitty things to you. you're about to debut, you're going to see great success. everyday i'm rooting for you, even if i'm not the person you go home to."

you give his hands a firm squeeze. once, twice, three times. i love you.

"are you divorced?"

you scoff out a soft laugh, looking down at his jeans. "jake and i haven't been together since the wedding. we spent the honeymoon playing mermaids and crying over whiskey sours."

"i can't forgive you right now." he confesses, making your head snap up to look at him. he swallows hard, "i can't forgive you right now, because i'm still mad at you. for saying those things to me, and…and you hurt me, when you asked me to sing for your wedding. it hurt me a lot, y/n." "i'm sorry, hee." you whisper, your thumbs wipe at the tears spilling from his eyes. he leans into your touch, before pulling away. "i know you are, y/n. i know."

he gently pushes away, offering his hand to help you up. you take it, and he waits for you to put your shoes on before leading you back to the door. "i'll call you, okay? when i'm ready."

you step out of the studio, peering up at him with sad eyes. "you promise?"

he sighs, nodding his head. "i promise, baby."

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feyascorner · 11 months ago

Text

wish you would look at me

summary. convinced that you’re in love with another, when you approach him with a serious expression, he readies himself for the inevitable—rejection. but is it ever that simple?

pairing. astarion x GN!reader

warnings. light angst, fluff

a/n. this is inspired by the ppl who have love triangles w gale and astarion in act 2 and what he says if you pick him bec when I saw that I almost cried pls let him be happy

If you asked him a few weeks ago, he’d laugh at the mere suggestion that he could ever be jealous of someone like Gale. That blasted wizard couldn't go four steps before begging for a magical shoe or pathetically limping his way behind the rest of the group while you frantically searched for the said shoe. And when he found out the wizard was a few errors away from exploding, somehow Astarion felt even more pity (not really) for the lad.

Yet here he was.

He’s not sure when the hell you and Gale had gotten so chummy, but it rubbed him the wrong way. Even if his expression would never show it. He sips at his wine while Karlach and Wyll continue to chat about God knows what, too busy peering from the corner of his eyes as you lean into Gale’s shoulders to look closer at the book he was holding.

Perhaps the tadpole had finally made you lose your mind. He'd almost dropped his goblet when you denied his invitation to his tent tonight, spouting the excuse that you'd asked Gale to help you with something, and now this?

God knows why you ever found the wizard charming. If Gale could do something, he could too—much better, in fact. He was sure of it.

His grip tightens around the goblet when he hears you laugh.

Sure, his original intentions for approaching you had been less than noble…and he might have seduced you for more selfish reasons than you originally knew, but as much as he hated himself for it, he'd grown rather fond of you. In his own way, of course.

He’d only realized that the anxious squirming in his stomach was not of fear but of affection when you'd defended him from that vile drow at Moonrise Towers. He'd half expected you to ask him to throw himself at her, yet you stood your ground, showing nothing but respect to his own boundaries while you failed to realize that he'd deceived your own.

He truly had no reason to feel this way. He was selfish, he knew, for feeling so possessive because not once had the two of you established being exclusive. Though you'd respected him, you saw him for just that. A friend to respect, and nothing more. Sure, you'd spent a few nights together, but it was a mindless night of passion and he knew he'd continue to be your fling until you found another to truly love. He had just hoped it wouldn't be someone like Gale, of all people…or Wyll…or Shadowheart…or anyone for that matter.

He shakes his head. The wine must be getting to him. Serious relationships aren't a luxury he can afford, he reminds himself, relaxing his shoulders. He’s perfectly okay with being your ally—nothing more or nothing less. Ecstatic, even.

But when Gale flips a page of the book and both of you lean closer again—this time dangerously close—he feels a sharp pain shoot up his hand.

“Uh, Fangs, you alright there?” Karlach stares at the cracked glass in his hand and even he blinks at it in disbelief.

Apparently not.

He sighs irritably, dumping the glass elsewhere. “I’m quite alright. Seems I just need a nice comfortable mattress than a thin bedroll on the ground, but it’ll do for now.”

“Need help patching that up? You're bleeding.”

He almost laughs, if it weren't for the giggle coming from your direction. “Blood’s my specialty, darling, remember?” Without another word, he paces into his tent, closing the flap behind him for the universe signal that screams ‘don’t bother me.’

So when half an hour later, when he no longer hears the crackle of the campfire, he sees your shadow emerge from the other side of his tent flap, he squints.

“Can I come in?” He fails to respond, and hears you shuffle. “Ah, are you asleep?”

At this, he can't help but snort. You instinctively peek inside, and he runs a hand through his hair, sighing in defeat. “If I'd been asleep just how would I answer that question?”

He motions you closer and you take it as a sign to step inside, careful to avoid stepping on any of his belongings before situating yourself in front of him. “It was rhetorical, obviously!”

“Of course,” he doesn't seem convinced, lips curling into a teasing grin. “Now tell me, what brings you to my palace this late at night? Surely not for a cuddle. I'd thought you declined my offer earlier?”

Usually, you'd smile, but instead you only look down at your clasped hands, seemingly in thought. “I needed to talk to you—without everyone else watching.”

The usual brightness to your tone is missing.

Oh, he thinks. You've come to end things with him.

“Ah,” is all he says. He can tell his smile hasn't dropped, but it doesn't feel that way. “I hear you've found a new lover. Perhaps you want to keep yourself for this one, true love? How romantic, darling.”

You frown at this, and he wonders if he’s done something wrong. But it does little to stop his defense mechanisms from springing into action, because he’s immediately slipping into his usual mask, grin stretching wider but never reaching his eyes.

He hates the words coming out of his own mouth as if they taste of poison. Still, his voice is steady, almost teasing. Perks of the 200 years spent shamelessly lying, he supposes. “So, is this the end of our late night trysts? Even though they were an awful lot of fun?”

He doesn’t think he could stand watching you with that damned wizard. He doesn't even want to think about it quite frankly, because all he feels is his chest tighten when he imagines someone else holding you the way he does. And gods, if had to watch Gale’s poor attempt at flirting one more time…

But then again, you'd be with someone who doesn't manipulate you. Someone who doesn't toy with your feelings, or someone who doesn't seduce you for protection.

His smile twitches, and he just braces himself for your response.

“I’d rather be with you.”

He stares at you, eyes wider than its ever been since he'd gotten this damn worm in his brain.

“What? Why?” he blurts, embarrassingly so, before he composes himself again and clears his throat. “I mean, well, I know why—but I thought you'd had something more…with Gale.”

As much as he despises the idea, he'd seen the way you'd laughed with him. And while it was a new experience for him to be fond of another person, he'd found that these feelings had led him to rather you be happy than dragging you down with him. If it meant you wouldn't regret your choice, he’d been willing to deal with it.

So why?

“I want something real with you, Astarion,” you say softly, eyes meeting his. “I don't know if you feel the same way, but Gale and I are better off as friends, and I told him before I came here. And besides, it’d be cruel of me to lead him on while my heart is with another.”

He thinks he might have died again just now. For the first time in decades, he’s actually at a loss for words. “I—if that's what you truly want—we can try. Be lovers, I mean.”

You finally smile at his words, and Gods above if that doesn't lift the excruciating weight of the past few weeks off his shoulders. He feels the warmth of your lips when you lean forward to give him a peck on the cheek, everything happening so fast that his mind is spinning. He snaps back into focus when you pull back.

“I’ve wanted to do that for a while.”

You could have—should have, done it earlier. With a smile of his own, he leads you back to him, this time planting a soft kiss on your lips. It’s short, and not nearly enough, but it’ll do for tonight.

“Well then, consider yourself wholeheartedly taken then, my dear.”

#astarion ancunin #baldur's gate 3 #baldur's gate astarion #bg3 astarion #astarion x reader #astarion x tav #astarion #bg3 x reader #fluff #angst with a happy ending

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weird-is-life · 4 months ago

Note

If you're open to aaron hotchner x reader requests, what about being a consultant/detective etc and Hotch has an obvious crush and trying to play it cool? Maybe with the team noticing but reader is totally oblivious! Thanks

Hiii, lovely!🥰 I'm soo sorry that it took me so long..... hope this is okay. Warnings: fluff, mentions of food, Derek being a wingman, (1k)

Aaron is staring. And he doesn't even realise it. You are standing just across the room chatting with JJ, and Aaron can't keep his eyes off of you.

He doesn't know what's happening to him. He hasn't felt this way in a long long time. He can't even remember the last time he wanted to ask someone out.

There's an attempt to stifle a laugh behind Aaron, and he doesn't even need to turn around to know it's Derek.

"What?" Aaron asks bitely, frowning at Derek in his usual way.

"Nothing," Derek puts his hands up, but the stupid smirk stays on his face. "Nothing, just that you should ask her out."

Aaron doesn't react immediately, not wanting to out himself. He tries to play it cool (too late for that), "ask who out?"

Derek laughs again," C'mon, Hotch. You're not really being discreet about it."

Aaron just glares at him in warning. He doesn't feel like having this conversation with him, like at all. Aaron doesn't even want to admit these feelings to himself let alone Derek.

"You really should, Hotch. It would be good for you. And she obviously likes you too," your red cheeks around Hotch, and the stolen glances tell Derek enough of your feelings towards Aaron.

"Thank you for you suggestion, Derek. But I don't think you're right about it," Aaron tells him, not wanting to get his hopes up.

"No Hotch, you are wrong about it." Derek says, and pats him on the back, ready to leave Aaron be.

Aaron turns back to the paperwork that he definitely should be filling out instead of looking at you. The case is over, so the team only needs to sign off a few papers, and then they can go home.

They're not even very far from Quantico just a few minutes drive. So everyone is even more eager to get home, and Aaron doesn't want to keep them all here just because he can't stop staring at you.

"Derek," Aaron calls after him just as he is about to leave," tell everyone that you can go home. I'm not even halfway through the paperwork."

"You sure? I can help."

"Yes, I'm sure. Go home." Aaron leaves no room for argument, Derek just nods and heads to tell it to JJ. Aaron tries to push you out of his mind, and goes back to writing.

"Hello, ladies," Derek greets you and JJ," sorry to interrupt you, but Hotch send me to tell you that we can all go home. That he's going to finish the papers alone."

You scowl at Derek, "alone?"

"Yeah, you know Hotch, he's always working hard, too hard," JJ adds with a sad smile," but sometimes he lets us help him. It's not often though."

Derek nods in agreement, knowing there's nothing to do with Aaron's stubbornness. They both give you one last small smile before you say your goodbyes.

When it's only a few officers, you and Aaron left in your station, you drift towards where he sits.

He looks up at you as you approach, his eyes immediately softening. "Hey," you say, peeking over his shoulder to the papers in front of him.

"Hey, what are u still doing here?" Aaron asks, he wonders if you are staying late because of paper work, too. He hopes you don't.

"You know, just finishing everything. Better question is why are you still here, agent. You should go home. You and your team worked your asses off for the last few days."

Aaron stretches his back as he tells you," so did you and your station, and I don't see you going home."

You laugh, and you say, " touché." It makes Aaron chuckle, too. Smile wrinkles complimenting his already too handsome face.

"I wanted to ask if you need help with it?" you offer once your chuckling dies down.

Aaron shakes his head before he speaks," thank you for the offer, but no. You should go home. I got this."

Aaron is sending you home not only because it's late, but also out of pure selfish thoughts. He wouldn't be able to work with you sitting next to him, that's for sure.

"If you aren't leaving, Agent Hotchner, then neither am I," you murmur, and dissappear into your office. You emerge from there after a few seconds with a few papers in your hands.

You sit down directly next to Aaron, and suddenly it's like he can't function properly. Words lost in his mind, unable to write one proper sentence.

It takes him a good while to recover while you happily sit next to him, finishing up your own papers. Every now and then you sneak a glance at Aaron. His focused face makes you smile, because he looks so handsome and so adorable at the same time.

Aaron can feel your eyes everytime, but right when he returns the stare you avert your eyes, cheeks rosy. It kills him even more.

You sit like that for almost an hour, but both of you finish the papers. You stand up, stretching your stiff back, "it's been a pleasure doing paperwork with you, agent Hotchner."

Your kind smile is catching, and Aaron smiles at you too," it's just Aaron, please." He tells you, and you beam sheepishly at him, asking him to call you by your first name as well.

Maybe it's your smile or your pretty eyes, but suddenly Aaron asks boldly, "are you hungry?"

You think about it for a split of a second," definitely. I haven't really eaten anything the whole day. Why?"

"Would you like to get something to eat right now? With me?" Aaron quickly blurts out before his sudden courage about this runs out. If he Derek was there to see him right now, he'd be pissing himself laughing at Aaron's poor attempt.

Your eyes go wide, "like...-like a date?"

"Yes. Exactly like a date," Aaron leaves no room for doubt that he likes you like that. He's sure you know already, though.

"I would like that very much," you say quietly, bashfully.

It's Aaron's time to beam at you," great, then let's go. I know a place."

You manage to grab your coat before you are ushered to Aaron's car. Both of you as excited as one can get about a date.

#aaron hotchner x you #aaron hotchner x reader #aaron hotchner imagine #aaron hotchner fanfiction #aaron hotchner x fem!reader #aaron hotchner x y/n #aaron hotchner fluff #aaron hotchner

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honeyhoshi · 6 months ago

Text

scarlet, starlet pt. 1

summary: mingyu intends to make his girlfriend's wishes come true — all of them.

this a part of the man of the match universe

genre: professional football (soccer) mingyu, idol oc, porn with a little plot

wordcount: 3,251

pairing: mingyu x afab!reader

warnings: DDlg kink, d/s themes, both parties are safe, sane, and consenting adults, afab reader, lots of mentions of female anatomy, reader is implied to be significantly smaller than mingyu, making out, dry humping, finger sucking, fingering, squirting, huge mingyu, big dick gyu (canon), slight cum play, cum eating, exhibitionism, unprotected sex (pls dont do it, its not worth it), spit kink (bec i wrote it), creampie (also bec i wrote it), size kink go bbrrrr, bulge kink, dirty talk

author's notes: yet another work written for my lovely @madeforgyu! this is just part 1 of her birthday gift and is a part of the universe we have lovingly poured soooo much time and effort in. wuv u and all of that!

The excitement that comes with a new album and a comeback sometimes gets lost in just how complicated AM♡RE’s schedule has become. In between having to do pre-recording as a whole team, music shows would request certain members to be part of other variety segments which allowed other members to rest or even take on other schedules.

This led to fussy 4AM pre-recording sessions then running back to the company office to film overseas interviews and just napping during the car rides to and from one venue or another. By the time the whole team made it back to the KBS building for the live broadcast, the only thing fueling you was adrenaline and obligation. It’s a so-so way of celebrating your twenty-fourth birthday.

You try to shake it out of your system when you think of the cute pink drink truck that was parked by the entrance to the studio that your fans were enjoying. You think it could be a lot worse because you did catch a glimpse of the many birthday ads all over Seoul as you moved from one location to another.

But still, it could be better too.

With all the last minute activities and schedules being fit into every free moment you had in the past few weeks, it had been difficult to really set any celebration plans into stone with your boyfriend.

Your boyfriend.

A pout makes itself present on your face the second you start thinking of him. Having Mingyu around would make everything that wasn’t ideal about your birthday just simply melt away.

At this point, a message from him would suffice. You’re no stranger to receiving and sending messages at odd times but after Mingyu’s good morning message, all your other texts had gone unread.

You’re wracking your head if he had mentioned anything scheduled today but you come up with nothing because you can clearly remember that he said he was taking the entire day off to celebrate with you.

The thought sticks even as you’re being ushered on stage and you only really snap out of it as you find yourself in front of the crowd, the rest of your members bowing and waving before you have to take your starting positions.

You shake it off, thinking instead of how you’re sure a message from Mingyu will greet you the moment you step off stage.

You’re greeted by something far better than a text message when the music cuts and you’re trying to catch your breath.

A large smile is still plastered on your face as the thrill and joy of performing courses through you. The cheers fill you with warmth and satisfaction, hoping that you had given a good performance for the live show’s crowd, but a voice cuts through the usual noise of fans.

There’s a booming voice coming from the side stage and a “That’s my girl!” that sets every nerve on your body aflame in embarrassment and pride in equal measures.

It’s your boyfriend.

It’s Mingyu.

A bright smile splits your face and you can’t help the flush that paints your face pink as the rest of your members turn to see the afternoon’s special guest. With everyone on stage giggling and whispering amongst themselves with their lapels turned away from their mouths, even the crowd was starting to realize that something out of the norm was going on.

You make your goodbyes quick, giving deep bows of appreciation, but the excitement coursing through your body can’t be contained.

Once your leader has deemed you polite enough, offering you a sympathetic smile and nodding towards the general direction of the backstage area, you can’t move fast enough.

You briskly walk towards Mingyu who, despite his effort at dressing to be discreet, is still the most eye-catching person in the room. Standing tall and proud in the hustle and bustle of the music show staff is the top scorer of the Cheongdam Diamonds, offering you the most wicked grin.

There are so many eyes around you. Looks of jealousy, resentment, and also awe are no longer strange when either you or Mingyu are in the room. Having both of you present just meant all of the above, but a hundredfold. None of that matters to you at all when you let out a squeal and jump into his arms.

You don’t care. You’ve stopped caring. Let them see.

You can no longer count how many bad ideas have become good ones when Mingyu whispers them into your ear. You can’t even remember a time you’ve said no to him and his clever ideas. Not that you ever would really, especially when Mingyu always makes it worth your time.

It starts innocently enough, as it always does with you and Mingyu.

The second you managed to drag him into your dressing room, locking the door behind him, you had peppered his face and mouth with as many kisses as you could as he giggled and whispered birthday greetings every time your lips parted.

In no time, Mingyu had managed to wrap your legs around his waist and was guiding you as you slowly rocked your hips down onto his. The friction was so delicious even through all the layers of your stage costume but you knew that this would hardly suffice for either of you.

“I fucking hate these shorts,” Mingyu says with a grimace as his hands find their way to your ass, upset to find the layer of your safety shorts standing in his way.

Mingyu has always hated it when he would reach down and find your smooth skin covered with a seemingly offensive piece of clothing. On most days you barely wore any underwear around the house, just the way he likes it.

You love the little look of annoyance in his face and trace the lines of his eyebrows as you sit pretty on his lap, “They’re there to protect me.”

Mingyu can only snort at that.

You roll your eyes playfully, “Imagine if we stopped wearing these, then everyone would see what’s yours, Daddy.”

You feel his frown relax underneath your finger, “We can’t have that now, can we?”

“Nuh-uh,” You answer, allowing Mingyu to guide your hips. Even through the stupid safety shorts you could feel how his cock was pressing against the zipper of his jeans and Mingyu always knew how to find the cleft of your center to ensure that you were grinding your clit onto him.

“Why’s that?” He whispers against your lips, tongue flicking out to lick at your upper lip for just a split second.

You bite your tongue at the pleasure slowly building up between your legs and how he’s teasing you with his tongue, “Because this is yours.”

He makes a face of faux confusion before asking, “What exactly is mine?”

“This pussy.”

“Good girl.”

In no time, Mingyu has you strip for him and you stand before him, completely devoid of your costume. In the back of your head you can already imagine the frustration of the staff member assigned to assist you with getting fully dressed again, but the look Mingyu gives you has you pushing the thought away.

He’s sprawled on the couch as if he owned it and you’re dying to fall to your knees between his spread legs, but the second you move to do so, Mingyu grabs your wrist to stop you.

“It’s my sweet girl’s birthday today, so we’ll do all the stuff you like,” He says, standing up and crowding you against the counters littered with different makeup brushes and pots of eyeshadow and powder puffs.

“But I want to suck your cock,” You state as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

Mingyu chuckles and you meet his eyes. You’re entranced.

“I know you do, love. But I don’t want you to bruise your knees when I’m dressing you back in that little skirt.”

He has a point and you frown, “How about tonight?”

He smiles as he brings three fingers up to your mouth, “Okay, I’ll even let you choke on it. Now suck on Dad’s fingers, get them nice and messy.”

You immediately let your mouth fall open and start to lap at the three fingers Mingyu offers you, savoring the salt of his skin and the rough pads of his fingers. If you tried hard enough you could pretend they were his cock, hard and smooth and so so delicious. Your little daydream has you salivating in no time, coating Mingyu’s fingers and lubricating them enough for what he’s no doubt about to do to you.

“Look at that little mouth go,” He marvels, “So small, three fingers can barely fit. Are you sure you can suck my cock?”

You’re shaken from your thoughts and immediately a look of distress spreads on your face, “Yes, it can fit! I can make it fit. You’ll make it fit, won’t you?”

Mingyu’s fingers are barely out of your mouth as you try to convince him. The look on your face makes Mingyu smile. It’s horrible and mean and you love it so much.

“Yeah, I’ll make it fit. I’ll make sure my baby will take it.”

You preen at the promise and wait in anticipation as he pulls his hands away from your lips and pressing his mouth against yours.

This kiss was not exactly a typical one. Instead of pressing your lips together, Mingyu licks into your mouth, his tongue bullying its way inside and pushing your own tongue out of the way. He runs this tongue against the roof of your mouth and against your teeth until you slowly start to press your tongue against his.

You groan in relief as he finally eases up to kiss you properly but tense up when you feel one of his hands grab at your left thigh to lift it up and prop it up on the counter. This position has you spread wide open for him. He loves it when he can see all of you.

The slick that’s been gathering between your folds is surely visible in this position and it makes you clench around nothing as Mingyu pulls away to survey you in this position.

“So so pretty,” He whispers underneath his breath, not even to you, just to himself, “Going to destroy this tiny pussy.”

That’s as much warning as you get before he presses two fingers into you at once.

Mingyu is bigger than most men in all aspects. He’s tall and broad, having put in so much time to get his physique to where it is now. His sheer size followed everywhere else. His fingers were long and thick and the press of two into your core has your eyes rolling to the back of your head.

Whether it was his cock or his fingers, you knew to always expect a stretch. And you loved it.

“Sooo good, Daddy,” is all you can muster as Mingyu sets a punishing pace that has you trembling in his arms in no time.

Each curl of his fingers sent a jolt down your spine that had you inching closer to the edge despite how Mingyu had just started.

“My pussy is taking two fingers so well,” He says, “I think three would be even better.”

You hate that he pulls his fingers out but you’re immediately placated when he brings the two fingers to his mouth to suck your slick off of them.

He makes a noise of delight before removing his fingers and leaning down. For a second you think he’s going to eat you out but instead Mingyu spits out the saliva and slick he’s collected in his mouth and lets it drip down from your clit.

He moves back to take in the absolutely debauched state of your pussy, smiling to himself, pleased at how messy he’s gotten you, before spreading the wetness with his soiled fingers.

“Are you ready for three, little girl?” He asks, almost mocking. You preen at the nickname and at the promise of the stretch of three fingers inside of you.

Even with the preparation he had given you, he punches a deep exhale from you and he pushes three fingers. The fit is so tight that you can feel how the rough pads of his fingers are. He always did refuse to wear gloves when he lifted weights. Now you want to thank him for it, because the friction inside you makes you want to scream.

It doesn’t help how slowly he’s going either. He’s relishing in how your walls wrap around his fingers, how you tighten up when he slips in a little further. And when he crooks his fingers just right, he can feel how you’re getting just a little bit wetter, slicker.

“You take me so good,” He whispers against your lips, so close it's almost a kiss.

You’re breathless though, mouth slightly ajar, waiting for his tongue to slither between your lips. He doesn’t make a move though aside from a cocky smirk and an arched brow.

Mingyu lets his fingers continue on with their noble job of getting you closer and closer to the edge. Each push and pull of his digits inside you set your nerves alight, but the delicate movement of his right hands make you want to die.

Even as he’s coaxing and orgasm with three fingers on his left hand, the fingers on his right are tracing delicate swirls and unrecognizable patterns along your inner thigh. Every now and then they’d go higher, just by the lips of your pussy.

The pace is much too slow for your liking and you’re worried that your absence would start to seem suspicious. You weren’t at Mingyu’s training center where everything is kept under lock and key with a very well written NDA. You were at Music Bank where staff members were nosy and there was surely another girl group member roaming the halls, praying for your downfall.

“Daddy, faster,” Is all you can manage in between kisses on Mingyu’s jawline, licking a stripe to taste the salt of his sweat and that underlying tinge of just him.

You don’t expect his free hand to come and grip the underside of your jaw, his fingers long enough to reach both sides of your cheeks. He applies just the right pressure to squeeze your cheeks and force your lips into a pucker.

It would be cute if not for the look on Mingyu’s face.

“This is a birthday gift, angel. Be good while I give it to you, hmm?” He says as he begins to pick up the pace.

In no time the pace is punishing, the only thing slowing Mingyu down is how each push of his fingers back inside of you required a stretch and each time your walls made space for him inside you, you let out a little whimper.

When Mingyu presses his thumb against your clit, adding to the already intense pleasure, you can barely keep it together. In no time you feel the telltale signs of an inevitable orgasm.

No matter the method, every single orgasm Mingyu has ever given you was mind blowing, and this would be no exception. You feel the wetness dripping down your ass before you’re comprehending what exactly has happened, having difficulty in processing the immense pleasure coursing through you, your eyes slipping shut at the feeling of cumming all over Mingyu’s fingers.

Your walls tighten around him, even as you spill into his open palm and he continues to push in and out, droplets falling to the floor beneath you and between his feet.

Mingyu’s eyes are fixed on your entrance as he keeps you filled, pleased with how stretched out you are, ready for him to just slip in.

He pulls his fingers out only to move them to cover your clit, gently rubbing, keeping you on the precipice of pleasure, not allowing you a moment to come back to Earth. You’re in that heady space only he take you.

“Eyes open, baby. Watch daddy fuck his cock into you,” Mingyu says with a light slap to your face.

He moves and lifts your other leg up, maneuvering your hands that are wrapped around him to hold yourself open, keeping you fully spread open and seated on the dressing room counter.

Mingyu grasps his cock and gives himself one, two, three pumps to ease the initial need for friction, before he taps the now leaking tip against your clit. A pearlescent drop of precum falls on the hood of your clit and you watch, helpless as he harshly swipes at it with his thumb.

You hiss at rough handling but are immediately silenced when he brings the thumb up and shoves it into your mouth. He presses down on your tongue as if to wipe the cum off his finger.

He grabs a fistful of the hair at the nape of your neck and smashes your mouths together. You love the way even his mouth seems to hold dominance over your own. The movements, no matter how unruly, are still just the right thing to get you going once more.

“We taste so good together, huh?” He whispers after fucking your mouth with his tongue. He pulls away slightly and lolls out his tongue to let a thick wad of spit fall from his lips down to your center.

The impact of the warm liquid has your gaping hole clenching around nothing.

It pleases Mingyu so much that he forgoes all the other teasing he initially had in mind and just guides the head of his cock to sop up the spit on your pussy before pushing in to the hilt in one thrust.

The blissed out sigh that you let out set him on fire.

Gone is the idea of long, languid strokes to stoke the fire in your belly. Instead he goes with a punishing pace that has high pitched cries slipping from your mouth.

His hands find the thickness of your ass to keep you in place, his hips doing all the work of rearranging your guts. In this angle and position, he can see how the head of his cock bulges in your abdomen slightly. It if was possible, he would have gotten harder.

Having already been so sensitive from hardly being able to come down from your first orgasm, Mingyu’s actions had you reeling into your second one in no time.

“My princess deserves to come already,” Mingyu says, slightly breathless, leaning his forehead on yours “Dad wants this pussy to never let him go.”

You nod in agreement, “It's yours forever. I love you.”

It almost seems pathetic for him to cum at those words, but it's a spectacular orgasm as he pulls out until only the head of his cock is inside you before he slams his hips flush to yours and letting himself flood your pussy with his cum.

You’re delirious as he keeps you steady, pulling out so slowly to make sure you keep every single drop of him inside of you.

“Keep it in until you get home,” He says, “I want to slip right in the second you get through the door and still feel me inside you.”

You press your lips to his once, twice, and a third one for good measure before nodding excitedly.

“It’s your gift to me. I won’t let a single drop go to waste.”

remy @ahreumtouch • may 8 GUYS I JUST READ THE CUTEST FAN ACCT FROM TODAY'S MUBANK WTFFFF

remy @ahreumtouch • may 8 There's a special guest at today's live performance!! After the Midas Touch recording there was a really loud and DEEP cheeer coming from backstage. The members were all looking to see who it was ijbol!!

remy @ahreumtouch • may 8 Ahreum was so happy when she figured out who it was that after bowing and greeting fans she left the stage but her mic was still on!!

huhu our baby was probably so happy and giggly as she always is! the op of the fan acct thinks its Mingyu!!

thank you Mingyu for loving and taking care of our precious Ahreum! 🥹🫧🩷

remy @ahreumtouch • may 8 CONFIRMED WTFFFFF 😭😭😭 Mingyu was seen leaving Music Bank today!!

SIR U R A FOOTBALLER U HAVE NO REASON TO BE AT MUSIC BANK IF NOT FOR UR IDOL GF!!

#frizzy fiction #seventeen smut #svt smut #mingyu smut #mingyu x reader #mingyu imagines #mingyu scenarios #seventeen x reader #seventeen scenarios #seventeen imagines #au: man of the match

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milaisreading · 7 months ago

Text

Wedding day

Pairing: Itoshi Sae x Isagi's sister!Reader

Warnings: Reader uses she/her. Requests are open

⚽️Blue lock belongs to Muneyuki Kaneshiro and Yusuke Nomura⚽️

"Can you please calm down, sis? Everything will be fine." Yoichi said as he walked around the room after his sister. The older Isagi was panicking a little as she thought more and more about the whole wedding that was supposed to happen in an hour.

"You think?! Yoichi, what if I am not good enough? Sae is a literal football star and I am just-"

"The best sister and future wife. Exactly!" Yoichi quickly chimed in, annoyed that she had let the recent gossip on the internet get to her. While he did have sympathy for her, marrying a high profiled person lime Sae Itoshi wasn't nothing, he was also mad that she was doubting her own worth.

"Yoichi... You of all people know how the news are. They will nitpick on the most smallest things about me." (Y/n) sighed as she went over to sit on a chair in the room, Yoichi following close behind.

"What if they are right about me not being the one for Sae?"

"That's ridiculous! He loves you!" Yoichi argued again, but he knew it was useless. He wasn't Sae. The one whose opinion mattered the most right now.

"I don't know... What if I am just hindering him? There are so many better options than I am. Did you see all those models from Madrid who talk about him? What if I am not the one?"

(Y/n) held back a few sobs as Yoichi went to comfort her. He would be lying if he said he didn't expect the news to make such a huge deal out of the wedding. He did. But, seeing the state his sister was in just broke Yoichi. She didn't deserve all this stress now. Nor did Sae deserve to be doubted.

And, while Yoichi was comforting (Y/n), he didn't notice Rin peek into the room and catching some of the conversation the were having, and catching the distressed state (Y/n) was in.

'Shit!' The younger Itoshi thought as he slowly closed the door. He didn't expect to walk into all of that. While Sae was on cloud nine in his room, (Y/n) was over here distressed over some gossip.

'Wait? What gossip? Big brother never mentioned anything about that.' Rin wondered as he took his phone out to search for anything that remotely could mention either Sae or the wedding.

Meanwhile...

Sae was happily drinking the water Rin brought him earlier. The older Itoshi never expected to be excited over anything like a wedding. Well, he never saw himself marry anyone until he met (Y/n). The love of his life.

'Ahhh~ I am all excited for our future. I can't wait for us to finally tie the knot. Maybe even a few kids down the line, but that can wait for another few years. For now, I just want to enjoy my time alone with her.' Sae smiled softly and blushed, not hearing the footsteps approaching his room.

'My sweet (Y/n). She is so clumsy and cute. So adorable and always kind to me and others. I am so lucky to have found-'

"Big brother!"

Sae snapped out of his thoughts and looked over at the door as Rin walked in, looking oddly nervous.

"What's up with you? You are more nervous than I am." Sae joked but Rin ignored him as he kept on glancing between his phone and the older.

"Well..."

"Anyway, how is (Y/n) doing? How does she look? Bet as stunning as ever. She is so adorable."

Sae went on a ramble and Rin knew he had to cut it out now before he went into an endless loop with it.

"I... There is something you need to see, and I think you won't like it."

Sae stopped and raised an eyebrow at Rin.

"What do you mean?"

"It's about (Y/n). You didn't read any of the news some of the Spanish and Japanese media reported?"

"No. Why would I? They mostly say dumb stuff, anyway."

"It might be dumb, but the stuff nearly has (Y/n) crying right now."

Sae froze up for a moment and quickly took the phone away from Rin.

The younger Itoshi was used to seeing a lot of emotions on Sae, but anger, genuine anger was not one of them. The more Sae read through the articles Rin had found, the redder his face became and the more his eyebrows furrowed.

'I would pray for the reporters, but they deserve whatever happens next.' Rin thought as an eerie silence took over.

----

Once Yoichi had left the room to let his sister cool down, (Y/n) had finally realized how ridiculous it was that she was crying about these things. After all, if Sae really didn't want her, he wouldn't have asked to marry her. Right?

'I need to have more faith in him, and also be less sensitive.' She thought as she put down her phone, not noticing Sae walk inside.

"Why didn't you tell me about those articles?"

(Y/n) yelped , and turned around to see Sae walk into the room and towards her.

"Sae! You shouldn't see me before-"

"I don't care. Rin said you were distressed over what those journalists were saying. Why didn't you tell me about it?"

For the first time since they started their relationship, (Y/n) was left speechless by the anger Sae was radiating. Sure, she was used to him being angry over what Shidou would say at times, or even when he would lose a game. But, this was a different type of anger. It was more genuine than the previous ones.

"Why?" Sae's voice got softer as he grapped her hands into his, causing (Y/n) to turn red a little.

"I thought it was stupid to bother you with that. It's just me being sensitive-"

"It's not. The stuff those idiots said about you is disgusting, and I will put an end to it on my next interview." (Y/n) raised an eyebrow as Sae pulled her in closer.

"I thought you don't have one yet."

"I asked my manager the schedule me one after our honeymoon. As much as I hate going on these, this is a different circumstance."

"Oh? Thank you." (Y/n) said as she grew flustered, causing Sae to finally smile again and chuckle a little.

"Don't thank me for stuff like this. And, have a little more faith in me. I have my eyes only set on you."

"You are right, I an sorry. I know you do."

She smiled as the door opened again, revealing Sae and (Y/n)'s moms.

"Sar Itoshi! What did I say about seeing (Y/n) before the wedding?! And why did you make Rin guard the entrance?" Sae flinched at his mom's yelling as Rin could be heard apologizing to him from behind her. (Y/n) laughed a little as her mom tried to calm the other woman down, finding the whole situation equally amusing.

"Well, today is an eventful day." (Y/n) laughed, and Sae smiled at her.

'At least you calmed down.'

#bllk #blue lock anime #blue lock manga #blue lock x reader #bllk x reader #blue lock scenarios #blue lock #isagi's sister #itoshi sae #blue lock sae #bllk sae #itoshi sae x reader #itoshi sae x y/n

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leclsrc · 2 years ago

Text

wait and see ✴︎ cl16

genre: enemies to lovers, fluff, angst barely, other drivers appear

word count: 2.5k

The grid recounts the evolution, nature, and many ups and downs of your and Charles' vague relationship.

auds here... req'd, this was p fun to write i hope u guys like it! :) short bec if it was any longer it wouldnt have been as nice to read i think? anyway... i love u guys. title from this.

Lando takes a seat. “Is this the thingy for…? Yeah? Okay. What am I supposed to do again?”

“Just describe the two of them.”

“Easy. She was always pissing him off.” He rubs his chin, lost in thought. “But… in a good way?”

—

“I told you a hundred times I didn’t want this to be the soundbite you published.” Charles chases after you, his footsteps quickening like a lost puppy as you wrestle your way into the media pen. “A hundred times, and you said okay, and you still published it. Che succede?”

You turn, crossing your arms over your torso. “Look. I said yes, but when I looked it over, nothing else you said was really worth it. It was all just repetitions of the same PR bullshit that makes you look good on camera.”

He rakes a hand through his hair, exhaling with frustration, watching his biting comment on Iñaki rack up hundreds of thousands of views. “This was not a good idea!” He repeats, the same sentiment he’s been telling you in the half-hour he’s known of this video’s publicity.

“But it happened.” You adjust your mic and gesture to Lando, who’s awkwardly waiting for the cameras to roll so you can start the post-FP2 interview and he can talk about his shit car. “I’m busy, so deal with it. Your fans will appreciate you not riding Ferrari’s dick all the time.”

Charles opens his mouth to argue, but shuts it, shoving his way back outside and into the motorhome so he can cooperate in damage control. He doesn’t admit it—to you, to Carlos, to anyone—but the PR that comes of it is more good than it is bad in the end. He doesn’t admit it because it means admitting you’re right, and God if that’s the last thing he’ll ever do.

—

“They were always butting heads,” George says, laughing as he soaks in the memories of it. “Always fighting over something. Anything. Whatever there was that could be disagreed on—they’d be disagreeing.”

—

It started harmlessly enough. Seb walked in with two swatches of color—a blue and a purple—and addressed the room with a light tone, asking what color would best suit the tablecloths at his wedding. And then, as it always did with you and Charles, chaos ensued.

“Blue suits green better.” You wave the blue in his face. “You’re busy thinking of red all the time so you don’t understand color theory.”

“It’s not about coordination! It’s about creating a highlight!” He gestures with his hands, aggressively gesticulating to try and get his point across. “Highlight!”

“Oh, bullshit! Blue!”

“Purple!”

“Are you crazy?!”

Across the room, Seb and George watch in mild horror at the two figures caught in a needlessly intense argument over colors at a wedding that isn’t even theirs.

An AlphaTauri engineer comes in to refill his coffee for the third time, finds the two of you still fighting and is genuinely stupefied. He turns to the two onlookers, asks, “Bridezilla, huh? Happened to me once, too. I swear the grooms always try to weasel their way in to seem more involved but their choices never make sense.”

“Oh, no. They, uh, they’re not together.” George clarifies quickly.

“They’re not?!” The engineer and Seb ask at the same time.

They all watch the argument, bemused, but secretly they all wonder just how correct George is.

—

“We have a saying in Spanish. Del amor al odio hay un paso. Neither of them will understand it—it’s in Spanish, obviously—but I think that applies to them. One minute you think they hate each other, and the next…” Carlos lets himself taper into silence, smiling softly.

—

Being around Charles feels like karmic retribution, a constant eternal push and pull. But it makes the both of you better, even if neither of you admit it in the end. You can’t really grasp why, or how it started—it might take ages if you do so much as try—but you’re content with letting things happen the way they do.

Or maybe you’re not. “You ruined my fucking broadcast, dickhead!”

You toss your earpiece at his chest, body welling up with annoyance. Your segment was being casted live until Charles insisted he take up your airtime to do whatever-the-fuck, you honestly don’t care. And yeah, sure, he’s way more relevant, but the less airtime you get, the less easily you get the exposure you need.

“It happened one time.” He sounds amused, and it patronizes you, sets you on fire. He clutches your earpiece to his chest and hands it back to you.

“Fuck you.” You tug it toward yourself, and suddenly you’re closer, noses almost touching. You step back, but it’s not enough. “You have no idea how much that mattered to me.”

His eyes flit toward your lips, your bodies melting together. “If it really did…” he says, inhaling, “you would’ve just ignored me.” And damn, he’s right.

Charles does not like you. He just knows you well. But then one might argue—isn’t that the same thing?

—

“They have trouble not calling the shots, is the thing,” Lewis offers. “So put them in a team, in a room together, and boom.”

—

“…We didn’t agree on this script.” You underline the problematic lines and toss it onto Charles’ lap from where you stand in front of the sofa. “You want your fans to hate you?”

“The questions were clumsy. I asked you to reword them, but you didn’t.”

“You didn’t ask, to be clear. You demanded.” You click your tongue.

Lewis is in the middle of posting on Roscoe’s Instagram account and manually making typos, but he looks up, interest piqued by the increasingly heated conversation.

“I asked,” Charles insists stubbornly. “Plus, this is a Ferrari segment. You get hired to write on Ferrari, you follow Ferrari.” He points to the yellow logo on his shirt. Ferrari, he mouths. Lewis stifles a chuckle at the sarcastic exchange.

“Jesus.” You reread the script. “Fine. I’ll reword this and this.”

“And that.” He points, tapping the paper.

“Only if you edit this and this. Oh, God, and this.”

“Fine. Wait, that?”

“Are you serious? It’s the corniest statement ever. Edit that or I edit nothing.”

“Okay, bossy.”

Lewis exits Instagram in favor of texting Seb to ask if you two are dating. The response he receives is equally unhelpful: Nobody knows mate.

—

“You know, for all the disagreeing they did, they actually agreed on so much of the same stuff. If they stopped fighting for two seconds they would agree on most things.” Alex muses. “But they never did, so. Or maybe a few times.”

—

Media is a tricky thing. It’s either on your side, or it isn’t.

And this weekend, Charles has drawn the short straw, subjected to bouts of backhanded journalists and tweets for his strategy during quali. You know this especially well—you’re media, for Christ’s sake—and you’ve seen your colleagues hound Charles for how he chose to tackle the session.

Alex is in the middle of a FaceTime call with Lily when he hears it. “Wait—I think they’re talking,” he says to his girlfriend when he hears you approach him, carefully maneuvering himself into optimal eavesdropping position.

“Is this the right thing to do?” Lily’s voice comes through like static.

“I know it’s wrong,” Alex confesses. “But—”

“No, I meant I can’t hear properly. Move the phone closer, you dick.”

So he does, and the two of them listen intently to your talk. You go first, a few shuffling footsteps and an adjustment of your media pass, then. “Will’s been all over you today.”

“Yeah,” comes Charles’ voice, tired if anything. “I, uh… I just hope I can understand where I went wrong and, uh. Well, uh.”

“No, I…” There’s heavy silence. “I think you did the right thing. You didn’t get pole, but it was a good strategy. Better than what was being proposed, anyway. I think that would’ve landed you at the back of the grid, to be honest.”

You both laugh. “Thanks,” he croaks.

“You did great. Don’t, um… don’t let them tell you otherwise. I’m proud of you.”

Alex never tells anybody what he heard. But it inspires many long-winded conversations with Lily about the nature of your relationship. Each time, though, they never arrive to a solid answer.

—

“Hey, listen. I always knew something was there with those two. They had the kind of dynamic you only find once in, like, a million instances.” Daniel says firmly. “But I also kept thinking… poor Charlotte.”

—

You’re half-sure Pierre was the one who bought you all shots. Or a quarter-sure. Okay, you’re not sure at all. Your mind’s cloudy, your inhibitions lowered, tongue loose and laugh contagious. Around the table everyone is laughing, some others have gotten up to dance, but you, Daniel, Lewis, and Charles are all conversing about work, albeit while drunk.

“Is… tequila… plant-based?” Lewis grimaces as he throws another shot back and you all laugh mindlessly.

“Danny,” you say, tapping his shoulder. “Any plans once you’re out of the paddock next season?”

“Ah,” he hums. “Self-discovery and a shit ton of shrooms.”

You all cheers to the epiphany, shots once again entering your system. “And a party again tomorrow!” Daniel adds half-jokingly, much to your delight. Charles, right beside you, throws an arm over your shoulder as he laughs. You’re unfazed.

Daniel’s gaze lingers on his arm a little too long, especially because your own hand reaches upward to wrap around his wrist, to make sure he doesn’t pull away. But you’re both drunk, he reasons. And plus, you can’t usually stand each other’s guts.

“I’ll pass, mate, if it happens,” Charles says, his tone clearly inebriated.

“You’re no fun,” you say lightly, laughing and turning to him. Your eyes are on the other’s, dark, lips almost touching as if you’ve forgotten Daniel and Lewis are even around (though the latter is as good as dead, honestly.)

“Invite Charlotte instead,” Daniel says with a smile, to try and test your reactions. “How long, now? Three months?”

You clear your throat, looking away with a faux smile.

“Oh. We’re not doing so well, to be honest.” Charles smiles, tight-lipped. He hopes Daniel doesn’t ask why. He can’t think of a lie quickly enough to cover how Charlotte told him I love you, Charles, but this is over. I hope you end up with her someday.

—

Seb takes some time to think about it. “Those two always fought. Everyone said that, didn’t they? All the time, disagreeing.” He hums. “I could tell very early, though, that they were also the only two who could truly understand the other. Figuratively, obviously—but as a result, also literally.”

“Elaborate?”

“When you understand someone that well, inside and out, you end up understanding everything they say.” Seb smiles. “That was them, I think.”

—

“It’s impossible to transcribe your interviews,” Will says to Charles. It’s that hour on the paddock where everyone’s waiting for the pre-race bustle to start, so small talk is what’s keeping them busy.

You’re reviewing a few clips from practice on your phone and Seb is chipping into the conversation, which has moved from Mick’s future to F1 into Sky Sports into this.

“What do you mean?” Charles asks.

“You’re always sliding in and out of your three languages!” The Englishman laughs. “I have to consult a native speaker of both Italian and French each time. And you’re always going I, I, I, or we, we, we… but hey, the fans dig it, innit?”

“I think I sound perfectly understandable.” Charles smiles. You’re still busy, unfocused on the conversation at present.

“Like, okay. Look at this.” Will retrieves his phone, opens his voice memos app, and plays one of the audio recordings there. It’s a scratchy one of Charles describing his quali session, and sure enough, even if he’s speaking straight English, the adrenaline and exhaustion have him sounding totally indecipherable.

We—we had gasjdhfhs and I, I, I… I think we need to rejshdhs and thijsjsh about the hsfhdh, yeah? And, and, uh, we ajhshajs. And

Will closes it. “Sebastian, can you tell me that said?”

He shrugs, amused. “Sorry, Charles. I genuinely can’t.”

“See?!” Will makes a voila motion. “Nobody understands this.”

“He said we had good traction and I think we need to recalibrate and think about the boxing strategy, yeah? And we need that mindset.” You’re still going over your phone, busy and not 100% invested. “You two just aren’t listening.”

Charles doesn’t take his eyes off you, or the smile off his face, the whole hour.

—

Pierre comes last, clearing his throat. He’s ready. He knows exactly what to say, so he says it. “Those two are fucking soulmates.”

—

It’s three-thirty when somebody knocks on your hotel room.

But your body still feels like it’s five in the evening, your brain’s stuck at two in the afternoon, and your sleep schedule thinks it’s nine in the morning, so you’re not asleep but instead rewriting notes from the weekend prior.

You’re horribly disoriented when you grab your pepper spray and unlatch the door, and even more disoriented when you see Charles on the other side of it.

“Am I crazy?” He asks, breathless, like he’s been waiting for you all his life. Maybe he has.

“You’re at my hotel room at three a.m., so… a bit.” You rub sleepiness and jetlag out of your eyes. “Charles, what’s going on?”

“I love you.” There it is. “It sounds so stupid. But I love you. And it’s almost—I can’t bear it. I woke up this morning? You, on my mind. Lights go off after a race? You. I go to sleep? You. It’s always you. And I know, I know it’s—I know, with Charlotte, and—but it’s true. I, I, I—I think about you every minute. And usually this happens accidentally. Nous sommes tous des idiots quand il s’agit d’amour... moi y compris.

“But this was… I knew I was falling in love and I let it happen. And so I thought, why keep waiting? Why let it drag on and on and fight over and over when I can just come and tell you how much I—and maybe, hopefully, see if you feel the same?”

He pants, tired from his clearly rambled and unplanned confession.

“I love you, too,” you say, struck. Oh God.

“Can I kiss you, then?”

“It’s may,” you breathe. “May I kiss you.”

“You may,” he whispers.

“Right now?”

“Anytime.”

“So now.”

“It’s now or next Tuesday,” he jokes.

“Now is… the best. Now would do.”

“Now would do.” So you cross the threshold and let him scoop you into his arms so he can well and truly kiss you.

—

“Is that all?” The interviewer asks Pierre. “Just… those words? We need a bit more for the article on this event.”

“Oh, yeah.” He gets up, straightens his tie. “Don’t worry. You’ll hear the rest during my best man speech.”

Del amor al odio hay un paso – From love to hate, there is one step.

Nous sommes tous des idiots quand il s'agit d'amour... moi y compris – We are all fools in love... me included.

#f1 #leclsrc2000 #charles leclerc #charles leclerc x reader #charles leclerc imagines #charles leclerc drabble #charles leclerc smut #f1 x reader

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amalthiaph · 6 months ago

Text

I took an interest in The Bad Batch around the tailend of S2. It's not news to Tumblr that I almost slept on this show. And I cannot thank Caleb Dume enough for being the reason why I pressed the play button for this one. While I haven't been around for most of its active run, and I wish I had been, the last year has been among the best months of my life.

This show challenged my morals, and taught me lessons that I will forever take with me.

Tech taught me to embrace and take pride in who I am. I now think that I am not something that needs to be cured. I needed to be understood and accepted. He taught me that we deserved to be loved and be allowed to live the way we want to (as long as we are not causing harm to ourselves or to others).

Hunter taught me that at the end of the day, we're all still humans. We make mistakes. We fail. But we can learn from them, and we can strive to be better. And I should also take care of my hair bec I cannot accept that a man in a galactic war have better hair than me (Okay, did you honestly think I'm gonna be serious this entire essay?)

Crosshair taught me that at the end of the day, we really are still humans. Sometimes, we make choices that not everyone will understand or agree to. Sometimes, we don't even understand our own choices. But we can learn from them, and we can strive to be better. And that I should also go to therapy bec istg my hand shakes like hell I always need to rely on a pen stabilizer when doing my artworks.

Wrecker taught me that in this world where we can be anything, always choose to be kind. He is a great man who would always be there for everyone, and I hope that one day, I can be that person too. He is afraid of heights, but he climbs and go on high places anyway. Like him, I should also start conquering my fears. Dear Wrecker, I did try conquering my fear of heights last March 9 but I can't. I will try again.

Echo taught me to always fight for the greater good. Almost two years ago, me and a group of people campaigned for a great tomorrow. With pink flags and pink balloons, we worked on our little thing I like to call our rebellion. Sadly, we lost. At times, I am thinking of just giving up bec that's democracy and I cannot go against the people's decision, but characters like Echo and the rest of Rogue One taught me that nothing should ever stop me for fighting for the people's rights and that my love for my fellow citizens should always come first before hatred.

And lastly, Omega taught me to be curious, or more likely to not be ashamed for being curious. Learn about the world. Learn about lots of things. We never know when we need it. While I could say be good at strategy and win 30 grand on card games, nahhh, I'm not that smart.

I also learned to reevalutate myself as an artist. This show taught me integrity. I had ranted about this lately but these characters challenged me in terms of art. I knew that the creators aren't best at proper representation. While I could draw them as they are in the show, I choose to stand for what is right, and represent them as properly as my skills could. In the more technical side, I became good at drawing armors. And this little Actors AU Draw Series taught me to be responsible; I tried my very best to create and post them on time. This increased my productivity.

But enough about me.

There's something I realized two nights ago; we, the fandom, are Bad Batchers ourselves. We can consider ourselves a family, but not one of us is the same and we're all interesting, and capable in our own unique ways. We can have our own opinion and stand about something and still coexist. Like our favorite charactera, we embrace and celebrate our differences.

This show may end. No more Bad Batch Eves, no more cryptic tweets that cause us to hyperventilate, no more Bad Batch Wednesdays but it will live on, through us.

I know there will be a day where we decrease in number, one by one, little by little, but still, the show will live on through our actions, our opinions, our choices we make after May 1, 2024 because I know that all of us were changed in some ways by these characters and this show.

To the crew, your cryptic tweets caused me sleepless nights, but thank you so, so much. It is through your hardwork that we had this wonderful show. Thank you for making every second of the past year so worthwhile and enjoyable for me and for everyone.

However this show will end, whether happy or sad, I am glad it happened. However short my time was with them, I am happy I had been here. However short my time with everyone in the fandom was or if some of you leave one day, still, thank you so much for being part of my life; I am so happy I met all of you.

To Clone Force 99, thank you. I've never loved anything like this before. May the Force be with you.

#the bad batch #tbb s3 #tbb #star wars #amalthia cried while writing this

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blackenedsnow · 20 days ago

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Hello! Sorry for the message in Spanish! I think that I have sent the English version :<

Well...I was thinking of shadow sharing apartment or house with a queen of disco (I think it would be very cute the image of shadow sleeping on top of the big hair of a woman almost three times taller than him)

funk

WARNING: None

PAIRING: Shadow the Hedgehog x (Fem) Reader

NOTE: Hey it's not a problem! Thanks for sending this amazing request! It was so much fun writing this scenario lol. I’m always happy to create something special for you!

SUMMARY: Shadow the Hedgehog isn’t one for roommates, but somehow, he ends up sharing a place with you. A disco queen.

The apartment was quiet for once. Well, it was only quiet because you weren’t home yet, but Shadow wasn’t complaining. He didn’t mind the constant hum of disco music playing from your vinyl collection or the way you’d hum along while twirling in your platform shoes. It was just… a lot sometimes.

When you’d first moved in, Shadow hadn’t exactly expected to live with someone so full of life. His world had always been chaos, but yours? Yours was vibrant. You brought glitter, neon colors, and a wardrobe that could blind someone. Still, there was something about the way you lived that intrigued him. You owned the dance floor of life, and Shadow had never seen anyone do that so effortlessly.

He was sitting on the couch when the door finally swung open, revealing you in all your disco glory. Your heels clacked against the hardwood floor as you tossed your bag onto the couch beside him.

“Shadow, you’ll never guess what happened at the club tonight!” you exclaimed, spinning once before plopping down into an oversized chair. Your hair, as big and bouncy as ever, framed your face in a cascade of curls and glittery pins. You looked like you belonged under a spinning disco ball, not in a modest little apartment.

Shadow barely looked up from his book. “I’m sure you’ll tell me.”

“Oh, I will!” you said, leaning forward with excitement. “But first, I need to get these shoes off. My feet are killing me!” You kicked off your platforms, sending one of them clattering against the floor. “Ahhh, much better.”

Despite himself, Shadow cracked the smallest hint of a smile. He’d gotten used to your dramatic flair. Actually, he’d gotten used to a lot of things—like how your hair always seemed to take up half the room when you sat down.

“Anyway, what about you? Did you do anything fun while I was out?” you asked, brushing some glitter off your outfit.

Shadow shrugged. “Nothing worth mentioning. Just the usual.” He closed his book, standing up from the couch and walking past you toward his room. But when he reached the hallway, he paused and glanced back. “You should get some rest.”

You smiled at him, knowing that was Shadow’s way of checking in. “Yeah, yeah. I’ll sleep after I unwind. You go ahead, though.”

A little while later, the apartment was quiet again. You were sprawled out in your chair, half-asleep, while Shadow stood in the doorway to his room, looking at you. There was something oddly calming about the sight of you at rest. Your hair, now fluffed up even more from the night’s events, was almost comically big, framing your face like a soft, glittery pillow.

Shadow shook his head, but a thought crossed his mind. It wasn’t like him to seek comfort, but… maybe, just this once.

Without saying a word, he padded across the room toward you. Your soft breathing filled the space as Shadow climbed onto the back of the chair. He hesitated for a moment, then—gingerly—settled himself on top of your giant curls.

He could feel the softness of your hair beneath him, warm and light, like resting on a cloud. It was absurd, really. The ultimate lifeform, sleeping on a disco queen’s hair. But somehow, in the midst of all the glitter, chaos, and color, it felt right.

You stirred slightly but didn’t wake up, and Shadow relaxed. Maybe disco and darkness could coexist. He could handle the glitter, the music, and the energy—because somehow, you made it all feel like home.

#shadow the hedgehog #shadow the hedgehog x reader #shadow x reader #sonic #sonic the hedgehog #sonic x reader #sonic fanfic #x reader #oneshot #ask #request #fanfic

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dirtyvulture · 1 year ago

Text

Alpha!Natasha Romanoff x Omega!Fem!Reader

18+ only, read at your own risk

Requested by 🦥 anon: What about alpha!Nat who is anatomically female so she can't knot or mate with omega!Reader like Alpha!g!pNat can so she has her best pal beta!Bruce or alpha!Tony invent a knotting strap on 🫣 now alpha!Nat can Knott her little omega anytime she pleases. Bonus if omega!Wanda enchants the strap so alpha!nat can actually feel it 🤤

-🦥

AN: This was a good one. Thanks, 🦥!

"What's wrong, Nat?" you ask when you feel your alpha's arm squeeze your torso tighter than normal. She exhales into your hair, and you know it's not from exhaustion from your earlier activities, but frustration.

"Um, nothing," Natasha says, that is obviously a lie, but if she won't tell you what's on her mind, you won't push it.

"Okay, well, good night," you respond, cringing at the awkwardness but not wanting to dwell on it.

While you fall asleep in record time, Natasha lies awake, holding you tightly as she stares at the back of your head. The thought that she can' t be a proper alpha to you, simply because she is not equipped with the right body parts, is infuriating and saddening to her. Not that you had ever complained once or saw her as any less than the male alphas, but Natasha had an internal struggle every time you begged to be knotted and she simply...couldn't.

She didn't know what to do, but she had thought about enlisting the help of some of her colleagues. As awkward as the request would be, maybe it would help her self-esteem and you would be so pleased with the result.

So the next morning, Natasha goes off to have the most awkward conversation of her life with Tony Stark.

***********************************************************************

Natasha is practically vibrating with excitement as she carries you to your bedroom. Even you can sense her amped up emotions as you wrap your arms around her, kissing her hard and sloppily.

"Are you okay, babe?" you ask, breaking away for a breath while pulling your clothes off at the same time.

"Yeah, I'm just happy I get to be with you," she says, taking off her shirt, then her sweatpants. When she drops her pants, you gasp at the sight of her new strap. The color matches her skin tone exactly, almost looking like an actual extension of her body and you can't help but lick your lips at the thought of it being inside of you. It's a little smaller than the one she normally uses, but thicker to make up for it. Your core aches around nothing.

"Like what you see, baby?" Natasha says, grasping her cock and stroking it. "I had it specially made..." She debates on whether or not to tell you the truth of the toy's origins, but feels like it might ruin the mood now.

"It looks so good on you," you pant, hooking your hands around her thighs and pulling her onto the bed with you.

"It'll look better inside you," Natasha responds with a smirk, trying to contain a moan when her hand reaches her tip. It was a little strange and first to be able to "feel" with the faux cock, but now she's eager to stick it inside of you and experience you in a way she never has before.

As Natasha hovers over you, you instinctively reach for her cock and she gasps so loud when you touch it, you recoil your hand as if you've hurt her.

"Nat?" you ask.

"No, it's okay, baby. Touch me again," Natasha says, and you wrap your hand around her cock, causing her whole body to shudder. "I can feel it," she admits, dropping her head to press her forehead against yours. "I'll finally be able to feel you, baby. And properly knot you."

A thousand thoughts of curiosity fill your head, like where in the world she managed to get a strap like this, but now your only concern is getting her inside you. Although Natasha had never disappointed you in bed, your heart rate skyrockets at the thought of her getting to feel you and knot you. It seemed almost too good to even be real.

"Does this feel good?" you ask, jerking her cock off a little awkwardly, mostly because you don't have much experience. Maybe that would change soon.

"Yes," she whispers, her hips moving jerkily every time your thumb swipes over the tip of her cock. "Keep going, baby."

Even though you're stroking a silicone toy, you swear it feels like it's throbbing in your hand. Maybe it wasn't such a gimmick after all.

"Okay, stop, stop," Natasha says suddenly, afraid she's going to burst. She swats your hand away, her stomach clenching almost uncomfortably to hold herself back. She pushes you to lay down fully, carefully positioning her cock at your entrance. "Ready, baby?"

"I need you, Nat," you whine. "I need my alpha."

Natasha holds her breath as she slides into you with ease, almost collapsing on your chest when your hot walls wrap around her, holding her in a tight grip like she's never been before. "Oh, God. Oh fuck, Y/N..."

It feels different having her inside of you like this, almost like you can feel her throbbing.

"I want you to knot me, Nat," you beg, reaching up to lock your hands around her back to hold her close.

"I will, baby. Hold on." Natasha starts jerking her hips in broad strokes, obsessed with the way you clench and squeeze around her. She pushes in until she can't see any of her cock anymore, but the subtle bulge of your stomach, and the fire of arousal burns through her veins. She leans over to lick and nip at the mating mark on your neck, slamming into you with powerful thrusts.

You moan at the sensation of being filled so deeply, Natasha soothing the ache of emptiness in your loins with each thrust.

"Knot me, Nat, please," you whimper, scratching down her back. You can sense her desperation and need, feel her desire as she twitches inside of you, her size seemingly growing as the knot at the base of her cock starts to inflate.

You can't believe this is about to happen, as Natasha grunts and groans into your ear, promising to fill you with her pups and knot you properly for the first time in your life. You're awash with bliss as she thrusts into you strongly, holding you down as her body starts to tremble as she empties her seed into you. There is an almost painful stretch in your core and you look down to see the base of her cock fit snugly into your pussy, preventing any of her cum from spilling out of you like it normally does.

The pressure in your stomach is too much and you are too aroused to hold back anymore, tipping your head back into the pillows and moaning as you gush around her cock. It feels like a lifetime of pure ecstasy as you lay there, Natasha fully connected with you. You don't ever want it to end.

"My perfect omega," Natasha whispers, stroking your hair as she tries to calm down from her own high. "I love you so much." Today was a complete success in her book, and she can't wait to knot you over and over again in the future.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

AN: Please like, reblog, and comment! Follow for more content. 🥰

#natasha romanoff #black widow #natasha romanoff imagine #natasha romanoff smut #abo supremacy #natasha romanoff x reader

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judesmoonbeauty · 8 months ago

Text

2024 Villain’s Festival: Jude Jazza Bonus Story Part 1 ♛

Fan translation only. Not 100% accurate. Please expect grammatical errors. Cybird owns everything. Feel free to re-blog, but please do NOT post my translations elsewhere. Please note, I will translate what I am able to obtain during the event. This is a two-part story with part two only available to those who rank. I can not guarantee I will receive part two. Part 2 was achieved.

Translation notes are marked with *** Alternate translation is marked with///

Kate: Haa…

(Yesterday, Victor's momentum got me nodding my head…..)

(It's a lot of responsibility to decide where all that money goes.)

Starting today, I’m sure they’ll go after my heart any way they can for the bonus.

(But, I don't think I can stand the thought of being targeted for a while….)

I think I understand a little better now how the criminals targeted by the Crown feel.

I'd like to hide myself at least for the morning to prepare my mind.

(Okay, I got out of there without anyone finding me….!)

(Let's just stay out here and kill some time and go back in this afternoon.)

???: Where are you going out so early in the morning, Princess?

(This voice is…?)

Kate: Jude…?

I slowly turned around and saw Jude standing at the gate under the dazzling morning sun.

(I knew it was Jude. But there was something wrong with the way he just spoke.)

Jude: What’s wrong? You’re making a strange face.

Kate: What's wrong with…..the way your talking?

Jude: You’re curious?

Jude: I wondered if this way of speaking will make you like me more.…..

Kate: Huh? Like?

Jude: Ah...I almost forgot. I bought this because I thought you would like it.

He hands me a paper bag, manipulating his beautiful Queen's English even though he is not at work.***(See T/L at the bottom).

It was a paper bag from my favorite bakery. The bag was warm and smelled good, as if it was freshly baked.

Kate: I can have this?

Jude: Of course. I bought it for you.

Jude: I just think it's a bit much for one person to eat.

Jude: I'm hoping we can have breakfast together…..what do you think?

Kate: “What do I think”?!

(I can't believe you asked me for my opinion…..!? Who is this, could it be prank ......!?)

It was almost as if Victor would jump out and say something like, "Yeah! It was a huge success!

Jude is being totally strange right now.

Kate: Um, have you been working too much? Or did you hit your head?

Jude: What makes you think that?

Kate: Because you’re acting too strange! I think you should see Roger!

Jude: Am I sick? There's nothing wrong with me……but if so, I hope you’ll take care of me, Kate.

Jude scooped up my hand in a flowing gesture and dropped a kiss on its fingertips.

Kate: Eek….!!

Jude: …….

I thought I saw a vein on Jude's temple rise when he saw me scream.

I may have seen it wrong, though, because it disappeared in an instant.

Jude: I've only recently fallen for you by accident, so it's no wonder that you’re surprised.

Jude: What do you think? What if we went on a date for the day, and I let you know how I feel about you?

(Oh, he stared acting strange since today...... perhaps, without a doubt.)

Kate: Jude, did you do something elaborate like this just to collect all the bonuses?!

Jude: No way….

Kate: Because, even if heaven and earth were to topple over, there’s no way that you would fall in love with me, Jude.

Jude: ……..

Kate: See, I knew it!

Kate: If you can get money just by spoiling me, you’d think it’s worth the money!

Jude: Haa…..***(See T/L note at the bottom)

With a sigh, the mask of the pasted-on smile crumbled.

Jude: Ya know exactly what I’m doin’….If ya know that much, then give me what I want.

The sweet atmosphere from earlier has completely changed. Jude shoots me a sharp look.

I felt a little relieved because his eyes, which held a dangerous light, were the same as usual.

Kate: Give it…..

Jude: The winner's necklace. Ya wear it, don'tcha?

Kate: I will not give it to you!

Kate: This is my very heart and I will not give it when threatened. Because those are the rules.

Jude: Tsk, how annoyin’. If you're gonna talk about rules, whaddaboutcha, who tried to escape from the review?

Kate: I’m not trying to escape….

Jude: If ya weren't gonna run away, where were ya goin’ to go out so early in the morning?

Kate: That’s…

Jude: Oh, I remember now. Ya were gonna go out with me, weren'tcha?

Kate: What? I didn’t promise that….

Jude: Is there any other reason why ya left the castle so early in the mornin’ other than your plans with me?

Jude: I can't imagine. Why don't we ask some of the other guys?

Kate: Is that...a threat that if I don't go out with you, you'll reveal that I tried to run away?

Jude: If that's whatcha think, then that's whatcha think.

Jude: So, whaddya doin’ today?

Kate: …….

Kate: I'm going out with you Jude.….

As I gave up and accepted the proposal, Jude smiled wryly, as if convinced of victory.

***Queen’s English. This is a literal translation. According to Cambridge Dictionary: the English language as it is spoken in the south of England, considered by some people as a standard of good English. Essentially, Jude is speaking proper, well-educated English when trying to woo Kate.

***I believe it's self-explanatory, but I went all out on his informal speech just to contrast it with his proper English that was described as beautiful by Kate.

[Next] [Master List]

#Ikemen villains #ikevil #ikevil translations #cybird translations #ikevil spoilers #ikevil jude #jude jazza #ikevil jude jazza #ikemen jude #ikemen jude jazza #ikevil jude translations #screaming crying throwing up

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miaoua3 · 2 months ago

Note

hi^^ can u req for a joshua fic where in bf!shua took gf!reader to a date to celebrate the eldest daughter day, and made her feel like a teenager again — amusement park date, matchy headbands, sharing cotton candy, shopping galore after (which she didnt really got to do stuffs bec she busy with her ‘eldest daughter’ duties ykeim 🥺). just joshua making her feel like she deserves this treat too. thank you!

(sorry english isnt my first language 😭)

heyy! (first of, your english is perfect sweetie, have more trust in yourself❤️), and sure you can- i love writing fluff with our joshua, he’s just so sweet that he makes it impossible to not want to write the fluffiest things with him☹️anyway, i hope you enjoy this and that you take it easy! love you

Care For You

Pairing: joshua x f!reader

Genre: fluff, comfort (no hurt), amusement park date, healing your inner child, joshua best bf ever, mentions of bad relationships with your parents

Description: after noticing that you had a hard week (as well as hard life in general), joshua decides that the amusement park date is long overdue for the two of you❤️

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

joshua has always been very observant of the people he holds and loves dearly. even the things they themselves wouldn’t notice, he does. it’s always been in his nature to give out comfort to those around him who have hard time.

so after he noticed you move a bit slower, talk a little less, your dark circles get a bit darker, your work keeping you up a little bit longer than usual, getting easily annoyed at little inconveniences, he knew what kind of week you were having and how much pressure you’ve been putting on yourself.

you were always a little bit of an overachiever-nothing you ever did seemed enough for you. you have always been like this, ever since he had first met you.

joshua, based on the few things and stories you told him, knew that these issues and habits stemmed from your early childhood and they continued well into your adulthood. being the oldest daughter, who always had to act perfectly and accordingly, who your parents always had to count on not to disappoint them, who had to be this perfect image of a daughter for your younger siblings to have to look up to, who had to, in a way, raise them yourself, certainly seemed troubling to joshua.

joshua’s heart always ached whenever he saw how unkind and cruel both you yourself and your family were towards you.

especially when he saw just how good, hardworking, and kind you were to everyone around you.

he always wished he could somehow help you. to see how kind and loving you were. to make you see how proud of you everyone was, and how highly they thought of you. to heal what he never even broke.

so, that’s why, on the saturday night, as you came home from yet another excruciatingly exhausting day at work, you were bombarded with his gentle smiles, hugs and kisses, as well as a dinner that he prepared for you.

you knew your boyfriend well enough to see that this was just a setup for something bigger.

so you weren’t even surprised to have him wake you up the next morning at 6am (on your only free day).

this better be good, you thought as you looked at him through blurry eyes.

joshua, who was already dressed, was sitting on the bed beside you, his big hand gently patting your head.

smiling gently at you, he then spoke “hey baby, sorry to wake you up but we have somewhere to be, get up so you can get ready”, he pauses to kiss your forehead before continuing “the breakfast is ready and on the table. cmon now”.

no matter how unhappy you felt about being woken up so early, you were ready to hit the road (wherever it may lead you to) an hour later, still a bit sleepy but also excited for the new adventure that your darling boyfriend was taking you on.

holding his hand while he was driving, you find yourself feeling at peace for the first time in more than a week-as a matter of fact, so at peace that you felt yourself slowly drifting off to sleep again.

just as you were about to drift off to the dreamland, you felt his fingers slowly let go of your hand to instead caress your cheek carefully and gently, as his whisper reached your ear.

“sweet dreams, my sweet girl.”

the next time you woke up, it was hours later and the car wasn’t moving anymore, and your boyfriend was nowhere to be seen.

you tried to look for any signs as to where you might be (or where your boyfriend might be for that matter), but just then joshua opened the door to the driver’s side and got in.

seeing that you were awake now, he immediately smiled. “hey sleepyhead, just in time”, he said as he stretched across the middle section to give you a brief peck on your lips.

you, still kind of clueless and disoriented, just ask him “…in time for what?”.

joshua, finding you absolutely adorable, just smiles as he responds “you will see in a little bit. but first- breakfast.”, and then he’s getting out of the car and to your side to open your door for you.

five minutes later, you find yourselves in front of a cafe. but not just any cafe.

you find yourself in front of a cat cafe.

something you have always dreamed of visiting since you were a little.

you, slowly and with hopeful eyes, turn to joshua and with a trembling voice ask him “really?”.

joshua, fighting the urge to puke from happiness and summon all of the gods possible just to high five them for letting him make you this happy, gently smiles as he tucks a bit of stray hair behind your ear. “really.”

that’s all you needed to hear to quickly jump and hug him tightly for a little second before grabbing his hand to drag him inside.

trusting joshua to order something for you that you will like, you immediately sit down on the floor and let yourself be surrounded by all the possible cats there are, cooing at them as they rub themselves against you and climb all over you.

you were a bit busy by giving all the cuddles to the cute, beige and fluffy cat in your lap to notice how adoringly joshua was looking at you, as well as him snapping a few pictures to have this day be remembered by.

after half an hour of you just being preoccupied with the cats, joshua finally called you to eat because your hot chocolate was slowly getting colder to the point it would be undrinkable.

after an hour of you eating (and cuddling with cats some more), you find yourself in the car again. joshua, still refusing to tell you where you were going to, was only smiling excitedly as he was driving.

whatever it is that he’s taking me to, it must he good you think to yourself as you watch his excitement bounce off of the roof of the car.

and as you stood in front of a huge amusement park, you understood his smug and excited smiles.

because this was better than good for you.

this was something you have always dreamt of doing, but were never allowed to do while growing up due to your parents deeming it “a waste of everybody’s time”.

joshua just looks at you-to see how you’re feeling, what you’re thinking. he was so excited to have done this for you, he has been looking forward to seeing your reaction since he thought of the idea.

ever so slowly, you turn your had towards joshua, your eyes big and glossy, looking at him as if they were saying “is this for real? im not dreaming?”.

joshua, with a proud but humble smile, just says “surprise”.

in one moment he’s looking at you, smiling at you.

in the next he’s trying to keep you both standing, tumbling a little bit due to you jumping onto him, your face burying itself in his neck, arms wrapping themselves tightly around his waist.

regaining his balance, joshua hugs you right back just as tightly, his big hand gently taming down your hair.

with all of the gratefulness you’re feeling for him, you whisper in a somewhat broken voice “thank you. thank you. thank you.”, repeating the words like a mantra.

joshua just closes his eyes as he kisses the side of your head, still softly patting your head.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

to say that the whole day was spent doing nothing but what you wanted was a given. joshua honestly didn’t care what you were doing as long as it was what you wanted and that you were doing it together.

so, naturally, you two started by riding the teacups. and if joshua felt like puking every spin the cup you two were in spun into? well he surely wasn’t going to tell you and ruin the mood for you.

the moment you two saw the stand with silly headbands in the distance, joshua knew what your next stop was.

so that’s why not even five minutes later he found himself with mickey mouse inspired headband (that was also matching your own minnie mouse headband) on top of his head. and naturally, you just had to take millions of pictures of you two together because how could you not when joshua was looking so damn cute?

following that, you dragged him to the sweets stand, where there were all sorts of candies available. as he did the whole day today, joshua naturally paid for the candies too. he wasn’t surprised at all when you shyly asked him if you could buy you a heart shaped cotton candy-and of course he said yes.

how could he ever say no to the love of his life?

while you were sitting down on a bench, joshua was looking up at the map of the whole amusement park and what rides you could go onto next-all while you were feeding him pieces of cotton candy here and there.

seeing that the park had a lot to offer, you two decided to just walk around for a bit and explore what you could ride next while the cotton candy in your stomach settles down a bit more so you won’t have to puke it all out as a result of the said ride.

and so came all the rigged games.

the moment joshua saw you looking at the big white teddy bear that you can only win by hitting the target with an arrow, he knew that he was going to do everything in his power and spend so much money just to win you that stupid teddy bear.

(spoiler alert: it took him 45 minutes and much more than he expected to win that teddy bear but it was all worth it in the end as he watched you squeal and jump around with the said teddy in your arms, struggling to hold him in your arms due to its humongous size).

the moment you spotted the tank filled with little goldfish, you immediately dragged him to try to catch one. (this time, you did tell him to stop trying after 10 minutes because you felt so sorry for him trying so hard for you.)

after playing many more games (and losing terribly at them), you saw a booth that said “tarot cards- one reading 5$” and you again, dragged joshua by your intertwined hands.

for some reason, the woman that did the readings had the policy that only one person can enter the booth-which screamed ‘scam’ to joshua but alas, who was he to say no to you?

and so he waited outside for five minutes that it took for the woman to read you your cards.

when he saw you coming out, he noticed that you had a weird expression on your face-not quite sad or upset, but more so like you were processing some thoughts.

feeling a bit uneasy, joshua gently grabbed your arm and rubbed a tumb over your shirt as he asked “you okay, baby?”

breaking out of your trance, you smile reassuringly at him. “yeah. you should go in though. the lady is so wise and she really knows what she’s doing”.

at your insistence, joshua pushes the dark purple curtain out oddly his way so he can enter.

waisting no second, the middle aged lady spoke “ah, we have another sceptic and nonbeliever hier”, she chuckles as she focuses on mixing the cards together.

joshua just looks at her like a deer caught in the headlights.

amused by his reaction, the lady points her ring cladded hand to the chair across her “please, sit my child”.

still unsure and now also a little bit confused, joshua sits down and looks at the lady in front of him with furrowed eyebrows.

not paying his confused state any mind, the lady asks him “so, what will it be. love, money or career?”

joshua focuses all of his attention on her quick hands mixing the cards together, opens his mouth to answer before he gets interrupted yet again “love it is then”.

now thoroughly freak out, joshua just watches with wide eyes as she slowly takes out 5 cards and puts them on the table in front of them.

how the hell did she knew what i was going to say?

the lady hums as she looks at the cards with a thoughtful expression.

“you’re afraid that you’re not doing enough for your lady huh? I wouldn’t worry too much about that, if i were you. instead, i would focus my energy on making her open up more to you, she seems to be carrying a lot of darkness within herself. let her let it all out and you two will get even closer than you are”.

she then taps on the middle card in the first row with her long nail. “i sense some big energy from you, energy that could bring you two potential problems, but as long as you two communicate and always choose each other over letting the problem win, you two shall be fine.”

she then points to the card next to that one. “unfortunately, she will have to deal with a big heartbreak in the near future, someone in her close family will be the one to do it. that will be the time where you will have to be strong for the both of you and take really good care of her. but worry not, for you will help her tremendously at those times.”

the lady then looks at one of the card on the bottom and smiles “ah, so we are already at the stage where we’re looking for the ring huh. make it simple-the whole thing. instead of grand gestures, she will treasure you showing that you care for her much more. make it intimate and sweet.”

joshua blushes at being exposed, especially because he just started looking for a ring not even two weeks ago.

she hums again as she looks at the cards again, before suddenly grabbing his hand, turning it palm up towards her. looking at it for a second, she closes his hand and taps the back of it lightly. “you have nothing to worry about, you two have a love story straight out of a romance novel in front of you. just makes sure to always take care of her heart first and it will all be fine”, she smiles softly at him.

just as he was about to leave the tent, the lady calls for him.

“ans joshua?”

he turns around and looks at her with questionable eyes.

the lady smirks at him as she answers “go for the second ring. she will like that one much more”.

blushing furiously, he quickly escapes the tent and looks around for you before his eyes find you already looking at him.

approaching each other, you question him about how it was, all while he avoids answering your questions, saying things like ‘so stupid, who would even believe all that”, muttering profanities at the lady, all with rosy cheeks.

it is only after five minutes of walking away from the tarot tent that it hits joshua.

he never told her what his name was.

looking at you to his right, joshua just thinks to himself that…

maybe the lady had the right about the second ring being the right pick for you.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

after riding more rides that made him almost puke your lunch out (the huge rollercoaster being the worst one out of all the others), joshua then starts dragging you by the hand, for the first time that day not being the one to be dragged around.

he seemingly knew where he was headed, his grip on your hand strong in fear not to lose you in the crowd, his broad shoulders and short hair being the only thing you could focus on.

the night was slowly setting on the sky, the stars barely visible due to all the light pollution in the park, and yet the only thing you could focus on is your lover in front of you and how warm his hand felt holding yours.

looking at him and on the whole day he organised for you today made you realise that this, right here, the person in front of you, was your true family. there hasn’t been a day since you two met where he hasn’t taken care of you and your heart. and then today? you can’t remember if you ever felt this…carefree and youthful. it had you wondering if this is how children should feel like? is this what it feels like…to have somebody love your inner child with all of its ‘faults’ and imperfections? you certainly wouldn’t know.

but looking at joshua…you just might be getting the idea about it.

you were so focused on your thoughts that you didn’t even notice where you were headed until you two were standing in front of what you could only describe as your dream come true.

a ferris wheel.

the minute you realised what was coming next, you gasped and started jumping up and down next to joshua, in process shaking him too due to him still holding onto your hand, his smile getting broader and brighter the longer he looks at you being so excited.

after a few minutes, your turn to buy tickets comes too. but for some reason, your boyfriend wasn’t quite done with being secretive and all that-because you find him whispering something to the man behind the counter, as well as handing him way more cash than the two tickets cost.

when you question him about it, he just smiles as he responds “you will see soon enough”.

your boyfriend had this weird habit, where he preferred sitting next to you rather than across from you, says that he would much rather feel pain in his neck from having to turn his head to be able to look at you than to reach across the table or whatever it is that is between you two to be able to hold your hand.

so, naturally, when you two enter the carriage, he sits right next to you.

and after a few minutes your carriage starts to move.

the view below you leaves you breathless. thousands of little lights in the distance, all twinkling in different colours. the people below you looking so incredibly small, you would’ve never guessed that they were right there, at the same place you two have spent the whole day.

you find yourself gasping and keeping your mouth open the whole time.

the fact you only realise later when joshua shows you a photo of you he took just now.

you carriage makes one full turn.

and then the second turn.

but then, on the third turn, it stops right on top.

just as you start questioning joshua what is happening, a single firework goes off in the night sky.

and then the second.

and then you lose the count of how many firework there are. multiple going off at the same time, looking like they’re fighting for the dominance, they all look so pretty, going off in so many colours and shapes.

you find yourself wondering…is this what a child feels like watching the fireworks for the very first time? it must be, because why else would you feel like this watching this beautiful sight for the very first time?

yes, your first time watching the fireworks.

something nobody ever knew about you.

not even joshua.

(or so you thought.)

after a few minutes, the magic comes to a stop, the stars now being the only thing to see in the night sky.

ever so slowly, you turn around to look at your boyfriend, a gentle smile grazing the edges of his mouth.

normally, joshua would find himself panicking at the sight of tears rolling down your cheeks. knowing (or, well, presuming) why you were crying, he just reaches with his tumb to wipe away the little droplet falling from your eyes.

to be completely honest, joshua never cared enough for firework and meteor showers like you did, probably because he has witnessed those things so many times, he forgot how surreal it must be seeing it for the very first time.

but looking at you right now, he found himself thinking one thing only.

joshua was never going to take one single firework going off for granted ever again.

smiling a little while his tumb still runs your cheek, he asks “did you like it?”

and that seems to have done it for you.

because suddenly, without any warning, you start sobbing, gripping the front of his shirt as you lower your head onto his shoulder.

joshua just hugs you closer, his hand gently patting your head.

through sobs you find yourself saying “t-thank you, thank you so much-so much f-for today, i-i can’t even- i- you make me so-so happy, you are l-literally my dream man, y-you are everything i have ever- i have always dreamed of i-i-“ breaking off in the middle of it to let out all the sobs you had to hold in in order to get your words out.

joshua suddenly brings both of his hands to your cheeks, bringing your face up and in front of his own.

with all the seriousness and honesty he possesses, he says “you are my dream come true too, baby. actually, better than any dream i have ever had. you are my reality, that’s what makes you even better.”

kissing joshua, right there, in the little carriage, you find yourself thinking one thing and one thing only.

if it were possible, you would spend decades being and feeling like a little child.

as long as you get to do it with the love of your life beside you.

#seventeen #svt #svt x reader #fypシ #tumblr fyp #fypage #joshua x you #joshua x reader #joshua hong #joshua #svt fluff #domestic fluff #fluff

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honeybubblebeeeeee · 11 months ago

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Breaking Up Slowly || Gojo Satoru x fem!reader

Gojo had broken up with you, for his own reasons but he still couldn’t stay away from you.

Part 2

You may read this and be like huh not realistic but i am writing this bec i was in this situation and it still got me messed up XD smut/hurt no comfort ://// (oral giving/receiving, penetration, creampie, nothing crazy) bad at writing smut bear with me

(also send requests! i appreciate them they help smmmm with writers block <3)

Your relationship with Satoru wasn’t ever a negative one. You two were compatible in all aspects. Your relationship was healthy. Until it wasn’t.

“I don’t understand! Just tell me what I did!” Tears were overflowing from your eyes as Satoru just stood at the door, a bag of his clothes over his shoulder. He couldn’t look at you even thought he was the one that ended things.

“It’s not you. I just don’t want a relationship anymore.” He looked to his feet and shifted uncomfortably.

You stared in disbelief. You had done nothing but give him everything. Anything he needed, you gave. You didn’t make a big deal when he was gone a long time and wouldn’t even answer his phone. You didn’t make a scene even when he was around and still needed space. You understood his job was hard. You didn't get mad at him when you hadn't seen him for weeks and when you finally did he didn't want to spend time with you.

“But why? Am I too much? Did I do something? Did I not do something?” You overthought every moment in an instant. You two had always talked when something was wrong. This is the first time there has been an issue and it wasn’t spoken about.

“No. I told you it’s not you. I just don’t want to be in a relationship. I have other things to focus on.” His blindfold masked any emotion that could be behind his eyes. It wasn’t often he wore it around you. So this felt like a punishment.

Taking in a breath you asked the hard question. “Are you seeing someone else?”

His head snapped to you and he took a step towards you but stopped himself from advancing further. “What? No. Of course not. I still want to be friends with you. I want to help you when you need it and….. and if you want we can still be, ya know, intimate.”

You scoffed at him. “You want nothing to do with me but you still want to have sex with me.”

Satoru sighed. “I still want you around. I just don’t want a relationship.”

Your heart felt like it was snapping in two. “Go. Get out.”

Satoru held out a hand. “Look Y/N, I-“

“Just go Gojo.” A flash of hurt crossed his face at your refusal to even use his name. He merely nodded at you and left.

. . .

A few days had gone by. Gojo had not spoken to you. You considered blocking his contact but it hurt too much. Part of you wanted him to take it back. To say he didn’t mean it and to come back. However part of you felt better with him gone. True feelings of how lonely you actually felt around him had risen to the surface now that you weren’t blinded by your love for him.

You were making your way to a hiking trail nearby your house when your phone started to ring. Pulling it out of your pocket, Gojo’s face lit up the screen. It felt like your heart was breaking all over again.

You considered not answering it but as the last ring started you accepted the call.

“Hello?”

“Hey! I just had to tell you this so I’m out with Yuji right. We were walking through the market and this curse comes out of nowhere. Sukuna and Yuji switch and apparently Sukuna knew the curse.” Gojo ranted on about whatever predicament he had been in. You were too stunned to say anything but oh, okay and force a laugh where it seemed appropriate. “So yeah I just thought it was so funny I had to call you to tell you.”

“Um yeah that is pretty funny.” Your mind spun. Did you imagine him breaking up with you?

“Anyway sorry to interrupt if you were busy. I just really wanted to tell you.” He sounded as if not a single aspect of this seemed wrong.

“I uh no. I wasn’t busy. I was just going to the trail by my apartment for a walk.” Through all his talking you had made it out of your apartment and almost to the trail.

“Oh really? I’m pretty close to there. I’ll come with you. I wouldn’t mind a walk. See you in a sec.” And with that he hung up.

You gaped at your phone. You almost wanted to call him back just to scream at him. You shook your head and kept walking, maybe he wouldn't be able to find you.

Just as you entered the trail, Gojo came up behind you. He smiled and waved, his dark sunglasses on. "Hey! It's nice out today huh?" You swallowed harshly and forced a smile at him. You walked in silence for a little while, Gojo's phone ringing broke the silence. "Oh sorry let me answer this." He walked away answering his phone, you stood there still in shock of how to even react to this entire situation. He was your ex-boyfriend now. So why was he acting like nothing ever happened?

He hung up and walked back towards you. "I have to go sorry but I'll catch up with you later?" He waved to you and made his way back in the direction you had both come from. You raised your hand weakly to wave to him.

. . .

A few weeks had gone by. Gojo hadn't spoken to you much. A few 'hey' and 'how are you' texts but they never went past a couple messages. Ironically it was him that was leaving you on read even though it was him who was texting you first. You hadn't physically seen him since that day in the woods.

It was late in the evening. You weren't tired but you didn't feel like doing anything in particular. In cases like this you resorted to weird hobbies at unconventional times, like baking at 11:00 pm. You had made a few batches of double chocolate chips cookies. One that had been your favourite and Gojo's. The man had a ridiculous sweet tooth and had always begged you to make them. You rarely had time to bake. It was one of those things you took for granted and regretted. If you had more time would he have stayed? Is that one of the reasons why he left?

Unsure what possessed you in the moment but you went for your phone and snapped a picture. Then sent it to him.

You: (Pic) i finally had time to make some more Gojo: ....are those the double chocolate chip ones that always stay super soft???!!! You: maybe Gojo: this physically pains me

You smiled at his silliness. You wanted to punch yourself for what you were about to do.

You: you could come by and have some i can even put some in a container for you to take home

He read the message and a few minutes had gone by. You cursed yourself. Gojo was your ex. Gojo broke up with you and here you were inviting him over cookies late at night. Smart. Real smart. You sighed ready to bask in your melancholy as your phone rang. Gojo was calling. You shouldn't answer right away right? Don't want to seem desperate... right?

"Hello?"

"I'm outside, buzz me in?"

You gaped for a moment before coming back to reality. "Oh right." You hung up and walked towards the pad by your front door, pressing the button, allowing him to enter the building. After a few minutes a knock sounded at the front door and of course you opened it to reveal Gojo. He had his black circle sunglasses on.

"Oh uh come in." Stepping out of the way to let him enter. Gojo slipped off his shoes and made his was to the kitchen. You shut the door quickly and followed him. He was practically drooling over the cookies. "Did you want a glass of milk or something?"

He turned to you. "Yeah but don't worry I'll get it. You sit."

You nodded as you leaned against the counter while he munched down the cookies in front of you. "These are so good. You always make the best treats." He leaned against the opposite counter across from you.

You two were really only an arms length apart from each other. You could reach over and pull off his glasses without even moving too much. "I'm glad you like them."

Gojo picked up another one. "You want one?"

"Sure" You shrugged and moved to reach for it but he moved faster and held it to you lips. You took a soft and tentative bite out of it. His sunglasses covered anything his eyes would reveal. He moved it away for a moment before feeding you the rest of it, then leaning back and simply watching you.

He took a shuddering breath before standing straight. "Did you see that movie sequel that came out? We used to watch the first one all the time." He moved over to your living room and plopped himself on the couch. You followed behind him, sitting on the farthest side from him. "Yeah... I haven't had any way to watch it though."

He smiled boyishly. "I downloaded it." He took a few minutes plugging something into the tv, where he pulled it out of you were not sure.

You sat separately as the movie started. Gojo paused it and looked to you. "Do you want popcorn?"

"Uh, yeah sure" You got up to move, but he ushered you to stay put.

"No, no I got it. Don't worry." He sauntered off to the kitchen. I guess on the plus side he knew where everything was. After a few minutes he came back, a large bowl of popcorn in hand. He sat more in the middle of the couch now. The bowl taking up the only space remaining between. Gojo slipped off his glasses placing them on his head.

The movie resumed. Both of you slowly ate at the popcorn while watching. Your hands brushed periodically and it made your skin heat. Occasionally you snuck glances at him. His soft frosty locks, his white eyelashes fluttering as he blinked. You could just barely see the crystal blue of his eyes.

You looked away quickly before he could notice but at some points you could just barely see him turning to you in your peripheral and not turning back right away. Sure, he could be looking past you but you doubted it.

The popcorn had been devoured. It was one of your favourite snacks and you knew he knew that. He placed the empty bowl on the table and subtly moved closer to you. You pulled your legs up in front of you, your feet facing him.

Your toes brushed the side of his legs. Even that little bit of contact almost had you begging for him. Mentally you scolded yourself. Swiftly, he scooped his arm under your legs and stretched them across his lap. "You can stretch out, it's a long movie." Gojo looked to you, a soft smile playing on his lips. His blue eyes dipped to your lips, your neck before snapping back up and then returning to the movie.

You swallowed sharply before looking back to the tv. Was it hot in here? You felt hot.

Gojo settled his hands atop your legs and leaned more into the couch. His fingers playing with the fabric of your pants absentmindedly as he watched on. You shivered slightly at the touch. "You cold?"

Coughing to cover your stutter, "Oh uh yeah a little." Actually your body was on fire and your heart was racing but you didn't stop him from reaching over and grabbing the throw blanket that rested on the side of the couch. Gojo strategically threw it over you both. You thought this would give you more of a barrier between you to stop his incessant touching that you were not going to out right say no to.

However to your horror or your relief his hands stayed under the blanket and continued his movements. You could feel him testing how far you would let him go. His hand rubbed up and down your shins, massaging softly. Could he hear the pounding in your chest?

Slowly the area he occupied increased, his hand running up your thigh, squeezing after a random amount of strokes. Could he feel you squeeze your thighs together every time he did? You were fidgeting. Flexing and wriggling your feet. Your hands busily picked at your shirt under the blanket.

Gojo's hand slowed and stopped. You took in a deep breath. Maybe his torment had stopped but you hated that it did. He readjusted your legs to move from sitting by his knees, to right in his lap. One hand moved to rest just above your hip and the other stayed, making taunting circles on your thigh. You forgot you were staring when he turned and looked at you. "You okay?"

"Uhuh." Swallowing you turned back to the movie. A few minutes passed. His hand on the thigh kept making taunting delicious circles while the other slowly started to move back and fourth.

You hated this, how he broke your heart, acted like nothing happened and then came over here like he still had some sort of say over your body. What you hated more was that your body didn't hate it, that you couldn't stop him. You could feel the slickness collecting between your legs. The way your body begged for his touch.

The circles above your hip had started out on top of your shirt. At some point that you hadn't noticed his thumb had slipped underneath and was toying with the skin right above your waistband. You adjusted your legs, he halted for a moment letting you move. You brushed the need that had developed in his pants. His face pinched at the contact, his chest rising and falling heavily.

As you settled, Gojo returned to his current occupation. The movie still played, you didn't even know what was happening. You pulled your legs away and stood up. The blanket falling, your eyes catching his hardness but you quickly looked away. "I um just need some water. Would you like anything?"

He spread his arms along the back of the couch, not even remotely embarrassed of his length pushing through his pants. "No, I'm okay. Thank you." You nodded quickly and moved to the kitchen. He continued watching the movie.

Grabbing a glass and a straw, some ice and some cold water you sat back onto the couch. What had possessed you to sit right next to him, under his arm? He threw the blanket back over you, draping your legs over his, while the arm behind the couch wrapped around you and he slipped his hand into your waistband.

You could feel his fingers running up and down the skin of your hip, if he moved anymore to the side he would have a handful of your ass.

Shakily, you sipped on your water, the ice clinking grabbed his attention. Gojo's crystal blue eyes looked down on you and you hated the way it made your core tighten.

"Thirsty?" You held the straw towards him in offering. Watching as his mouth found the straw, sucking softly, his throat bobbing as he swallowed. God, you have never wanted to be a straw so bad. What was wrong with you? He let it go, water droplets on his lips. "Thank you."

A shaky hand reached up and wiped the water from hip lip with your thumb. You hesitated right over his mouth. His lips parting, his warmth breath caressing your skin. Without hesitation he kissed the tip of your thumb, taking back the water droplets, the moisture wetting his already soft pink lips.

You let out a shuttering breath, his hands gripped you. One free hand grabbed your glass and set it on the table. You couldn't stop yourself from staring at his lips, against your better judgement your hands snakes around his neck, tangling your fingers into his white locks.

Gojo licked his lips, eyeing yours. "Can I kiss you princess?" Words failed you, so you settled for nodding your head. You wanted him bad. It was wrong but it didn't matter.

He hesitated at first then in record speed gripped the back of your head and pulled you into him. You couldn't even stay you didn't also pull him towards you. You clashed in a frenzy of lips, teeth and tongue.

Tugging at his hair caused delicious moans to leave his mouth and you swallowed them greedily. You nipped at his lip and he opened easily allowing you to slip your tongue past his lips. He pulled away for a breath. Both you of gasping, chests rising and falling rapidly. The way you had looked, eyes blown, hair a mess, lips puffy, must have triggered something primal in him. He latched onto your neck biting, nipping and sucking down to your collar bones and across. You knew he was leaving red angry marks but you had no intention of stopping him.

He couldn’t take it much longer. His hard throbbing length ground into you and it only made your core flare with need. Almost as if sensing it, Gojo picked you up, wrapping your legs around his waist and walking you to the bedroom. In that time it became a personal mission to leave just as many red marks on him as you were sure he left on you.

He deposited you on the bed, his glasses thrown to the side and his shirt discarded on the floor. Gojo grabbed you by the thighs and pulled you to the edge of the bed, slipping off your shorts and underwear in record timing.

"Wait, Toru I-" He stopped and looked up as you sat up and moved away a bit. A wave of disappointment crossed his face. "Do you not want to?"

"No, I do I just.." He grabbed you again, pulling you back down. "Then lay down baby and let me taste you yeah?"

His kissed up the inside of your thighs, nipping and sucking as he went. Small gasps left you lips and you looked down to see him already watching you. As he approached your center, you both stared at each other. His tongue licked a slow strip. "Mmmm... I missed the way you tasted. So sweet." You could not control the soft moans that left you lips as he slowed licked and sucked your clit. You writhed under him, to stop you from moving away he wrapped an arm around your waist, gripping your thighs.

With his other hand, he teased a finger along your opening. "You're so wet for me baby, fuck." Whining you gripped his locks, pulling his face back towards you. Gojo chuckled at your neediness. His long index finger slowly pushed into you as he sucked harshly on your clit.

"Toru, i- fuck" Your breaths were heavy as your chest heaved. His movements continued, his pace increased as he brought you closer and closer to the edge. "Toru, I'm so close, I- I can't-"

"Come for me princess, I wanna taste you, it's okay baby" Gojo continued his assault as he pulled you over the edge and let you ride his face as you rode out your high. Your body relaxed, eyes closed as his touch disappeared. You were too strung out to even really think.

He moved around the room but you didn't pay attention to him. You were so relaxed now you could have slept. Probably better than you had since he had left.

Satoru grabbed the back of your head and pulled you up to your knees on the edge of the bed. His cock on your lips, pre cum dripping out as you took him in. "Ugh fuck baby" His hand on the back of your head encouraged your movements as his length hit the back of your throat.

He did not give you time in between thrusts, relentlessly fucking your face until you were a drooling mess upon him.

Gojo pulled out with a pop and leaned down to bring his face to your level. "You look so good with my cock in your mouth princess. Did you miss my cock?" You couldn't say much, your brain clearly was not working so you nodded at him. His blue eyes were wide with desire as he smashed his lips against yours and pulled away abruptly.

"Turn around. I want to fuck you from behind. I love the way you look when I'm deep inside you from this angle." With slow movements you turned around, he grabbed your thighs to pull your knees right to the edge. Your reflection in the mirror on the other side of the room stared back at you.

His cock caressed your folds as he pressed down on your back making you arch into position. "Look at me." Your eyes snapped to his in the mirror. Slowly he pushed into you. Groaning as he did. Holding still once he was fully seated.

"Fuck~ you're so wet, your pussy is gripping my dick so hard it almost hurts. I can tell you missed me inside you." Both of you shuddered as he slowly pulled out to the tip and slammed back in.

Your nails dug into the blanket, soft moans leaving you both as his paced increased. One hand gripping your hip and the other pushing you down, keeping you in position as he slammed into you relentlessly. "I'm going to come baby, you feel too good I can't stop..."

His thrusts became stuttered as he pushed into you with one last thrust. Bending over you as you both panted heavily. Gojo kissed along your shoulder, across your back and down your other shoulder while still being seated inside of you. After a few moments he reached for the towel and set it underneath you, wincing as he pulled out and left you in a pool of your own mess while he cleaned himself off.

Your brain was still jumbled as your sat on the towel, before you even could come to your senses he was already dressed. His white locks a sweaty mess upon his head, his black sunglasses covering his eyes.

"Oh, you're leaving?" You couldn't stop the disappointment from entangling with your voice.

"Uh... yeah. I can't stay so." Gojo kissed the top of your head and went for the bedroom door. "I'm free later in the week. We can hang out again if you like. I'll text you." Before you could usher a response he left, closing the door behind him.

Tears welled and fell and quiet whimpers turned into full sobs as you sat in the mess of the both of you. You hated yourself for giving into him, for letting him touch you and be inside you again but what you hated more was that you knew he would be over again and you knew you couldn't bring yourself to say no.

#jjk gojo #gojo x you #gojo saturo x reader #gojo x reader #gojo satoru #jjk x reader #satoru gojo x reader #gojo angst

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stusbunker · 1 month ago

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Spotless: Cambiare

Chapter Thirty Five

Featuring: Dean Winchester/Reader

Other characters: Both bands and crew, Madison, Alice and Max Miller, Cas' brother Jimmy mentioned, Alastair

Word Count: 3241

Warnings, etc: Mutual pining, still unbeta'd, drinking and mild drug use, smoking cigarettes , Kevin is still a shit and we love him for it, fundraiser fluff, first show in Vegas then somebody shows up to ruin Dean's winning streak. SAFE House is a real organization, but all information about them in this fic is fictional, including locations, organizers and fundraiser protocols.

Series Masterlist

The desert sun shined down, even in mid-March, you were grateful for sunglasses as you walked across the parking lot of the furniture store that was hosting the fundraiser. Part of the core principles of SAFE House and organizations like it was its discretion, so nothing that night was taking place near the actual houses where families escaping domestic violence resided. The main office was tucked into a back corner of a row of single story businesses and also a good distance away.

Behind you was the band in ball caps and sunglasses, Bobby and Annie, while Benny, Cesar, Jesse and Chief followed behind. Charlie and the rest of the crew were setting up at the venue for the following nights’ performances. Victor and SPS had other plans for the night before their Vegas debut, but that was understandable. Plus, they sent their support both in person and via social media.

Alice Miller, the Director of Outreach, met you at the registration booth and gave you a bundle of volunteer badges and tickets for the food stands as well as a map of the grounds.

“We are so grateful for you being here and helping spread the word. We’ve barely been able to get away from the phones since you mentioned the event on the radio this morning. We’re expecting a record breaking year for the carnival.”

Careful to not seem too unsurprised, you downplayed what you expected to be a very busy night. “It’s the least we could do. Now— where did you want the band?”

“Max?” Alice called a younger man over. “Max is my stepson, and he’s in charge of volunteer assignments. While I’ll be around, Max will be able to answer any questions better than I would.”

The guy seemed a little awkward, but he also seemed to at least recognize who he was talking to. “Alright, guys, glad to have you. I have the band assigned two two hour long stints at the Dunk Tank, the Photo Booth, and the Face Painting stand. Your call on if you stick to one station or switch it up. I’ll leave the list with your publicist. Breaks are expected, but please let somebody know when you need one so we can make the swap as seamless as possible. Your team members are welcome to participate, or just stand guard, but please remember we are as low contact as possible with crowd control.”

You had clocked a good chunk of guys you suspected to be plain clothed police officers donning security vests at the next table. You kept your thoughts to yourself on that matter, as long as the families and participants were safe, you were happy.

“Thanks, Max. I gave them the spiel on the ride over. Can we get some group shots with you and the other employees before we get into our stations?”

“Of course, give me ten minutes and we can get everyone together. I’ll give you a walkie, too, just in case. Though we don’t have enough for everyone.”

“Understood.”

You gave him a firm nod and clipped the communicator to your back pocket. He ducked out of the small tent, while you stepped back towards the group you came with, so the line of other volunteers behind you could get signed in. You glanced down the clipboard with the empty blocks of scheduled time at each of the stations.

Kevin and Dean were on you in an instant.

“Please put me anywhere but the face painting. I can’t draw for shit,” Kevin begged.

“Sam either, don’t do it, Trouble. It will be a mess,” Dean warned.

“Okay, well, Dunk Tank is going to have to be an all or last stint because nobody is going to be able to pose for pictures or do face-painting when they’re soaked to the bone,” you reasoned out loud.

You turned and spoke louder. “Alright, Pam and Annie, let’s have you do the face painting. If nothing else you can just do exaggerated makeup looks.”

“Sounds good to me,” Annie said. While Pam sort of cocked her head and considered if this was the best course of action.

“Lee and Sam are getting the Photobooth first, if you get bored or overwhelmed we’ll swap you guys for the Dunk Tank. But what we really need are hecklers, and I think these two assholes would be best for the job.” You gestured to Dean and Kevin, the two devils over your shoulders.

“You know there are easier ways to see me with my shirt off,” Dean murmured, but didn’t argue with his assignment.

You turned and looked up at him, your reflection shining back at you in his sunglasses, which only made you more defensive. “If I wanted to sell skin, I’d send Sam over there first. But just for that, you’re booked all night. Happy chafing, Dean-o.”

Kevin cackled. “She just pwned you so bad!”

“Shut up, Kevin,” you and Dean said at the same time.

You tried to see if Dean had just been teasing, but your annoyance and curiosity were short lived when Bobby walked up and took the envelope of lanyards out of your grip, and started handing them out.

Somewhere beyond the entrance and registration booths a megaphone sounded, gathering everyone together for the pictures you requested and a quick information session.

The carnival was scheduled from four to nine, hitting the afterschool and afterwork crowds, but still reasonable for a weekday. Even in Vegas, locals had normal schedules most of the time. You took turns with the SAFE House’s media director taking pictures and gesturing people into position. Carefully you had them frame the band, Annie, Alice and the rest of the board in varying shots of size and distance. You should have brought a real camera, but your phone would have to make due for this event. There were over fifty people volunteering in addition to the security team. And every one of them was smiling at you, it was infectious.

It was going to be a good night.

You patrolled the grounds, gathering pictures of the band at their different booths in various poses and levels of embarrassment. Dean was the first one in the water and once he sunk, the crowd went nuts. His line snaked around the Fun House and back towards the Port-o-Potties.

Kevin had more success heckling Dean than those throwing at his target, but he, too, was drenched before long. It only added to the care-free atmosphere. Even though you knew Dean would have paid a pretty penny to be the one tossing balls in Kevin’s direction himself.

Sam and Lee started off pretty stiff with the Photo Booth, but once a group of preschoolers busted out the feather boas and other accessories, they caved like a house of cards. Neither man could deny kids, especially ones that might have been hurt at some point in their young lives, so they turned up the charm and silliness and had everyone in stitches before they took their dinner break.

Pamela and Annie had the quietest station. It was rather amusing, and a little surreal, that round after round of kids waited in line, picked out their designs, and sat still for the whole process before their parents, guardians, or grandparents recognized Annie Hawkins as the artist behind the butterflies or dragons now at their sides.

Pamela’s entire being screamed rockstar or badass. But as the drummer of the band, she was the least known by name, which never seemed to bother her. No, her confidence was unique in that it was a genuine, god-given, lack of shame. Something you had envied for a long time. So when only a handful of people asked for her picture along with her creations, she didn’t bat an eye. She just winked at the kids as they went about their nights and waved.

By nightfall, the crowd had reached capacity. The sounds of the various rides and games were constant and the bright lights kept the area surveyable. However, the temperature started to drop and the Dunk Tanks themselves weren’t well lit, which equated to Kevin and Dean’s station beginning to lose some of its luster.

“Okay! Let’s see what you got! Come on folks— this is for a great cause!” Kevin spouted.

“Freezing my nuts off of here! Hey big guy, think you could dunk me?”

You stage whispered, “this is a family event— keep your flirting to your own time!”

“Har-har!” Dean mock laughed.

You took another picture, but your flash really wasn’t the best with the Fun House lights offsetting it. Dean was dunked again and you asked Max over the walkie if you could end the line. It was a little after eight at night and between the cooler night air and the remaining people waiting, they deserved to see the finish line.

After a few seconds, you got permission to send Benny and Jesse to curtail new customers, “yeah, okay. We’ll start closing up those stations first, ease out of the night.”

You texted Bobby to start warming up the bus before making your way through the crowd to let the rest of the team know to wrap it up. Sam and Lee actually were already closed up, their tent had been packed up and they just sat sipping on flat beer from the one kiosk with a liquor license. Annie and Pamela had turned into more of a selfie and autograph booth then a face painting stand, but no one seemed to mind.

“We’ve got the all clear, meet at the bus in ten,” you let them know. Casually, you headed back to the Dunk Tanks to ensure the soggy bottom boys weren’t mobbed once they were back on solid ground.

Cesar, brilliant man that he was, showed up with a pair of fleece blankets from the bus just as the final set of balls were handed to Benny and Jesse. You grinned at him in gratitude, but had to film the final dunks for prosperity’s sake.

“Come on Benny! Let ‘im have it!” you bellowed as the head roadie wound up.

Jesse immediately sent Kevin into the depths, forfeiting the remaining two throws, and letting his husband help the smaller man off the platform and into a blanket.

Benny missed the first two balls, which Dean was not going to let him live it down. “Oh, he’s on the ropes! Look he’s not gonna make it, I should just climb down. That blanket is a-calling to me!”

“Just shut your trap, will ya?” Benny muttered.

“Make me, big boy!”

“Does he always flirt when he’s nervous?” you asked, knowing full well it was being recorded.

“Nah, darlin’. He’s showboating. He only flirts like this to make up for something.”

“Oh yeah? What am I making up for Benny? Cuz your aim is the only thing lacking here!”

With movie magic precision, Benny sank Dean on his last throw. The remaining crowd erupted and you scanned the area before sneaking closer to get Dean’s grumpy face as he crawled out of the tank and down the ladder.

“About time!” He called over his shoulder before Cesar could wrap him up too. Crouched over and shivering, Dean grinned for the camera before you hit the stop button on the video. Everyone laughed and joked while Dean and Kevin tried to dry off. After gathering their hats, phones, wallets, and socks and shoes, everyone left for the parking lot and the bus back to the Strip and the hotel.

You stopped at the entrance, dropped off the walkie talkie and your lanyards with Max’s crew. You made your way across the parking lot to the corner that Bobby had claimed for the bus, turning on your notifications for the first time all night. It was going to be a long night of scrolling and posting, but it was a good kind of busy to be.

The bass pulsed through the amps and across the floor, like an omniscient earthquake. You felt the heat from the stage effects across your skin. Pamela was taking the end of A Reaper’s Offering and taking over for her solo. The lights dimmed along the edge of the stage and everything focused on her. You felt the buzz of an incoming message on your hip from the walkie, but you couldn’t hear a single word.

“There she goes!” Dean rumbled somewhere amongst the shadows. The crowd responded then hushed itself just as quickly, awe-inspired.

Charlie has so much more at her disposal in this set up and she used everything she could to empathize the epicness of Pamela’s prowess, each drum was focused by its own color light. Pamela kept Charlie on her toes as she hopped from one to another, sometimes hitting three or four at a time. It was mesmerizing.

Your voice was hoarse already and still you screamed as she ramped it up to the big finale. Even in the wing off stage, you couldn’t hear yourself over the racing beat.

Lee whistled with two fingers in his mouth, shrill and celebratory. And still Pamela rocked on.

Sam slid down his E string, pulsing beneath her. You noticed how the others drifted back into position, four more measures and Kevin joined in. As the notes blended together Pamela pulled back, like a band of horses behind well-worn reins.

“Lead the way, Pammy!” Dean broke the spell and Pamela thumped into a familiar opening.

They weren’t stopping and slowing down for Vegas. ‘Abandon All Hope’ was left out of the first night’s setlist and the suggestive ‘Twigs and Twine’ swapped in instead. If you had to bet, ‘Brother’s Keeper’ wasn’t going to be featured either. And you were right, instead they played ‘Give Me My Ax’ for Lee to completely annihilate.

Charlie dropped the lights on them as Dean finished ‘Not Mine’ and the crowd did not stop for a full five minutes. You felt like you were tethered to a comet, soaring and burning alongside those brighter than you could ever hope to be.

The encores flew by and SPS joined them on stage, bowing and waving and blowing kisses to the insatiable masses. You knew the venue had photographers in the pit and along the box seats, but you couldn’t wait to get your hands on some fan shots. This was a show banners and websites were made of, raw and glistening.

Everyone descended the stage and flooded the wing you were occupying. The moment Dean’s eyes caught yours, his entire face changed and you both went to each other. Unthinking, two magnets across the mess of stagehands and band members just as he bent down to grab you into a hug, you hesitated, feeling unseen eyes in the upper levels.

You grabbed his elbow and drew him in further into the belly of backstage.

“What’s up?” Dean’s face was worried now.

“Nothing, just didn’t want somebody to see us.”

Dean’s brow pinched and he sighed, but stayed at your side. “How was it? Have fun?!”

You rolled your eyes. “I think I’m as sweaty as you are!”

“Well, I’m gonna hit the dressing room. If you need a shirt, I’ve got extra. Because there’s no way we’re stopping soon. Those high rollers ain’t seen nothing like the Winchesters in a hot minute.”

“Fine! But I’m capping you at 50k for the night, young man. Somebody has got to rein you in, especially since Jimmy isn’t on retainer anymore.”

“Ugh! Well, we’ll see about that.” Dean winked and threw his arm over your shoulder and walked you both to the pandemonium that was the dressing room.

You were very careful while out with the band to stay on the vertical side of inebriation. It was equal parts fear of embarrassing yourself and fear of losing control of one or more of the band. After Dean and Cas’ explosion in Chicago last spring, you rarely mixed substances, especially while somewhere as heavily monitored as Vegas.

A little No Doz and a side of vodka and tonic would carry you most of the night. If nothing got too crazy. Eventually, you’d snag a cigarette, but casino-hopping would have to wait. Dean was on a roll, literally.

Dice in theory was an easy game. The tables with all the Pass and Don’t Pass bet bullshit made Craps hard for you to follow, especially when you were too busy keeping an eye on everyone. Madison and Sam were getting handsy at a Blackjack Table. Pam had found her machine for the night and was racking up a nice total with just penny slots. While taking shots of whiskey in stunning regularity.

Lee and Dean were both rolling dice, but the tables faced the opposite direction and you were almost certain one or both of them were trying to hustle somebody. The house always won, but sometimes people got cocky and they thought these cornfed boys from Nebraska were easy prey. It was fun to watch.

If nerve wracking.

Dean’s eyes danced over his dice, everyone gathered held their breath as the dealer called out the victory. Dean jumped up, punched the air, and crowed with abandon. He was untouchable in his brilliance. It made something inside you shiver. Sometimes you forgot he was real.

“Alright, time to head out!” Dean decided, gathering his chips and heading to the teller line to cash out. You nodded to the rest of the band, with an annoyed eye roll from Pamela, but everyone followed suit. Benny and the Chief had drawn straws for that night’s detail, which meant Jesse and Cesar would have your backs the following night. It still felt weird to be Tiny and Bela-less, but it was also one less thing for you to keep track of.

The crowds outside of Cesar’s Palace were full of tourists as you stepped back out onto the strip. A rush of waiting photographers gravitated to your group the second Sam’s head cleared the exit. Fucking Sasquatch was too easy to spot.

“Guys! Fantastic show tonight!”

“Dean! Dean! Where’s Bela? What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas, huh?”

“Pamela! Lee! Are you guys back together? Will we see another Vegas wedding from you two?”

“Sam! Who’s the lucky lady?”

Everyone ignored them the best you could, keeping your heads down and letting Benny hold them off.

“There he is! The coward has returned!” A nasally voice made its way through the chaos and Dean stopped in his tracks. You dropped back and tried to drag him forward, while ignoring the jeers from the other paps.

“That’s a good girl, follow your mommy. Don’t want to get left behind,” the voice said senselessly.

“Dean?” you said, nerves dialed up to eleven.

Dean shook his head and scanned the crowd until he spotted a cameraless, beady-eyed face. “Benny! Keep that fucker away from us,” Dean yelled as he about-faced and took the group in a different direction. Benny fell back and stepped up to the taller creep, clearly making a point of starting a conversation as the other paps scrambled to keep up with you.

Dean dragged you and Pam by the wrists, keeping you at his sides until he decided you were in the clear outside the next stop. You had no idea who that guy was. After twenty minutes, Benny finally caught up with you guys and something in his eyes told you it wasn’t over.

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Chapter 36: Acciaccato

#spotless series #rockstar au #dean winchester fanfiction #dean/reader #dean x reader #slow burn #dean angst #dean fluff #vegas means baggage

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