#be better for everyone who hates us
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#you know the drill at this point#ignore this#personal#I keep thinking that if I was better maybe I’d be happier#I’d be proud of myself and less scared#I’d be less convinced that everyone hated me and I’d be more willing to do things#but I’m not a better version of me#I’m the one who is trying to keep myself afloat and alive#and my brain decided that convincing ourself that everyone hates us is the safer method#and I want to be better for them#be better for everyone who hates us#and sometimes I think just dropping off the face of the earth is the answer#even if it isn’t#I don’t know anymore#maybe it’ll get better when everyone realizes that I’m not worth the effort#At least we’ll be on the same page#I’m so scared of talking to people I care about#why am I muted during this call#why do I want to leave#why do I think they’d all be happier#maybe because they would be#one day you’ll be free of me and I’m sorry it’s taking this long
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well - webtoons is over, gang
#sci speaks#if everyone would please just read the blog at it's intended home on tumblr#and please stop getting me to waste my energy on all these other sites that i hate then that would be primo wonderful#tapas and webtoons are actual shitholes. convenient to read sure whatever. but i hate the format anyway#and how they treat their creators.#not to mention the way tapas gamifies their interface so you're like on a fucking gambling site?? like if temu were a webcomic service?#what happened to the internet being a free and fun place for anyone to post anything.#noo. copyright laws because we want to make money we can't just host anything out of the spirit of fun and freedom#what about the money??? what if we risk money??#internet used to be a better place. i hate the earth as it is right now. the internet is like a mine that corporations dug into.#and destroyed. right in front of my eyes.#it used to be a beautiful green pasture with wildlife roaming and now it has been flattened and turned into an ugly shopping mall.#the things i do for you guys who really. really wanted me to archive it somewhere else.#i''m not doing it anymore. it is here until tumblr dies or we all enentually die and all our efforts are lost to the sands of time.#nothing matters in a cosmic sense anyway. enjoy it while it's here.
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It's good to listen Charlie Vickers saying: "But ruling with her (Galadriel) is a step he never would have taken. He could never share this level of power with someone. Maybe she’d have been a figurehead, a mascot for the public, but I don’t believe that, had she said yes, they’d have been king and queen. It would have been him as king and her as his assistant." and that he intended to kill Galadriel when he hurt her with the crown (edit: he intended to kill her after the "the door is shut, go to therapy" scene), because while I terribly know the last trend of creators is to follow the tropes and giving the audience or shippers what they want, it's quite good to still maintain some consistency and the characters being IC.
#charlie vickers#the rings of power#trop#trop season 2#sauron#trop!sauron#sauron x galadriel#kinda#i don't ship them but I don't even hate them#i'm kinda impartial so I can appreciate better the honesty of Vickers's words#because someone would really think that he would treat her at the same level of himself and uhm noo??#quite impossible because he is a fucking maia and she is an elf#it would be so ooc#for a person who uses everyone as a tool#and honestly the canon dynamic between them and represented in these words is more fascinating to me#trop spoilers#show!sauron
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PLEASE STOP HARASSING DECK NINE DEVS AND LIS PLAYERS WHO DON'T AGREE WITH YOU.
Death threats are not okay.
Telling people to kill themselves is not okay.
Harassing people over fictional ships is not okay.
Harassing people over their opinion of a game is not okay.
Harassing already overstressed, overworked employees is not okay. ESPECIALLY since it's been documented they've been working under discriminatory and predatory management, been through multiple crunches, and have an unidentified neo-Nazi on their team who management did not properly address and fire.
You can still be critical of a game and not harass the people who made it. Hell, you can absolutely hate a game and still be respectful to the people who made it. I'm sure the creators are far more likely to listen to the fans if we give constructive criticism than if we irresponsibly and cruelly send threats.
I know most people who see this haven't sent hate, and to those people: this post isn't about you. I massively respect you for maintaining your rationality and empathy. But for those who have sent hate or are thinking of doing so, please reconsider. Sending hate isn't going to change anything; it'll only break the fandom even further apart and stress out overworked employees. If you're going to be mad, be mad at the higher-ups at Square Enix for turning the franchise into a cash cow and at the upper management at Deck Nine for overworking and alienating their employees. (Also be mad at that 1 neo-Nazi because seriously, WTF!?)
But please, even to the worst of the worst, do not send death threats or harass people.
#in other news instead of fighting each other i think pricefielders grahamfielders marshfielders and all other shippers should come together#to say that de did a major disservice to their characters#and advocate for better writing and representation and working conditions in their next game#because i seriously feel bad for the employees who received hate after years of trying to create a good game#while dealing with awful working conditions and a discriminatory work environment#also this isn't about lis but I just have to say it:#i am so so sorry to all my fellow americans out there#i will continue to post LGBTQIA+ content here#and be supportive of poc and immigrants (legal and undocumented) and women and everyone else too#the upper class may have failed us but we will not succumb to hate#not incorrect quotes
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actually incredibly funny to me that ranpos entire thing centres on how his intelligence is not because of an ability or any other great thing, its just him. hes entirely, completely, inarguably human. and Yet, when it comes to dazai, so many people are Desperate that there just Has to be another explanation. his intelligence cant just be that hes unusual, no it must be a marker of separation, of difference so great it disallows the reality of his humanity.
#dazai osamu#ranpo edogawa#bsd#sorry hating on main again. AND about to put 3 billion tags on this bc i have shit to say thats not well worded enough to be its own post#asgr cooking up shit about being that smart that young in places that dont accommodate it in a healthy way#(ranpo being disliked by adults bc hes smarter than them and dazai doing god knows what and then joining the mafia and directing it all#towards violence.) and then everyone only accepting it for ranpo but not for dazai is Crazyyy.#anyway. it leaves them Lonely which contributes to the inhuman feeling. FEEEELING!!! not reality#theyre going to feel beyond understanding bc their intelligence puts them ahead. theyre going to be easily bored bc things dont shock them#etcetcetc.#and then this is countered for both by ranpo finding fukuzawa who makes his own way to allow ranpo belief in his own humanity by#telling him hes Different in a Special Way rather than being some kind of monster by telling him that its all just an ability. (whether tha#is his best idea is. beside the point) whereas dazai has chuuya who doesnt need to be an intellectual match to surprise dazai and be#able to figure him out ('i know how you work' line in sb is fucking insane given the whole ln everyones like omg hes beyond understanding.)#theres still always gonna be moments where they feel Aside from humanity bc they dont think like normal people (hence the way dazai talks#abt humanity in dead apple. as fascinating and not worthless but still as distinct from himself and ranpo is 'im better than you'ing his#way through life.) but it IS just a feeling.#anyway!!! part of the reason their dynamic in particular is so sweet is bcccc ranpo is entirely human and hes that smart just by himself!!#and dazai tests it to check if its an ability but its NOT and you Can be intelligent in a way that seems impossible for human beings#and it doesnt disqualify you from humanity.#wahh#theres a lot of stories within bsd that work like this. investigating the things that make us feel outside of humanity#and then saying despite despite despite you will never be anything but. no matter how different you are you will always be at your core#a human being. and yet the fandom is OBSESSEDDDD with putting a bucket on their head and going SECRETLY A ROBOT! SECRETLY A LIVING ABILITY#SECRETLY AN ILLUSION THAT EVERYONES ALL SEEING!!!#like good god does it not get tiring#'dazai manipulated people too good this week. he knew too much info and is too good at things for a 15 yo so ive decided hes the book'#what the fuck are you saying
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throwing down my 2 cents in the alien stage band AU stocks <3
they're taking a small break during set rehearsal!!! mizi is trying really hard to subtly inch her hand closer to sua's while making it seem natural hehe <3
#my art#alien stage#mizisua#mizisua band au#alnst#alnst mizi#alnst sua#alnst mizisua#alien stage fanart#alien stage mizi#alien stage sua#digital art#fanart#i hate drawing backgrounds and i hate color#so like#this is gonna be the most you'll ever see from me for the next month or 2 lol#i just ughhhh i need to draw something that's not for work or school or I will explodeeee#and i need something happy lol#i say as im storyboarding something to we don't hug as if i didn't actually go into a depression spiral because of that song#i downloaded twitter after not being on there for more than a year and i honestly don't have a lot of warm feelings to stay but#i got to read over some of my old tweets from my private acc from like... years ago and it's making me so sick with nostalgia#there are people in those conversations that have gone and there are people who are still around but rahhhhh#i hate the feeling of everyone growing old and somehow i feel like i'm still walking around in circles from where i started#it's actually so funny#i've barely changed. everything is still so similar. i just used to be a little louder and now i'm much better at shutting up lol#which is ironic bc im so much better at small talk and yapping now. but ugh. i wish i could go back and hold my own hand.#girliepop you've worked hard. there's more to come lmao.#but anyway that's why im. escaping reality by drawing hehe
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I wish they talked about this more


That’s all.. (except the tags lol)
#caution yap ahead#teen titans comics#bart allen#a year and a half in complete isolation just reading and reading because SOME PEOPLE in your life who are SUPPOSED to be family#made you feel utterly useless and your friends going through teen angst and relationships and secrets aren’t helping#so you force yourself into isolation to ‘catch up’ with the rest of the crowd because ‘you gotta grow up sometime too’#you’ve heard everyone say it all your life but after getting your knee blown up and then got surgery to fix it in a law breaking#no pain killers procedure where your biggest fear was dissappointing your family and not about the mass pain you were in#so you decided right after it was done to walk right to the library sit down and just read.. for a year and a half. alone. all to prove#yourself and to make those around you less annoyed with you#this is a comic Wally diss#I guess I just wish they showed us the emotional repercussions of this#the surgery was bad enough but to spend that long alone right after being in so much pain is devastating#they did mention his knee bothering him after these issues dropped so they get points for not completely forgetting it#and he was dropping all the facts after this so they weren’t completely forgetting it happened#I’m just curious why they left the isolation part out#not to mention he’s just moved states and his father figure is missing and he can’t do anything about that fact#and yeah I guess it was cool of teen titans to prove in cannon that Bart is smartTM#especially to a wider audience since more people were reading ttv3 rather than impulse 95#I wonder why he took on the kid flash costume and moniker though.. I mean he could’ve stayed as impulse and it wouldn’t change anything#it wasn’t a progression through his family legacy either because we’ve seen him be prepared to go from impulse right to flash#multiple times too#I think Geoff just hated impulse and changed him to kid flash because it fit the titans mold better..#which is RIDICULOUS because Bart was a titan before even his solo series began during new titans
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oh my goddd my ex’s boyfriend is upset that my kid is sexist and thinks it’s bc my wife is a man-hating lesbian. no you dumb ass it’s bc the child is GOING TO KINDERGARTEN and LEARNING CULTURAL NORMS. the things she’s saying is “i don’t like playing with the boys because they’re rough” and “i like girly things like pink and purple and sparkles” THATS. that is not anything like what my wife might theoretically be saying in the other room about not trusting men without realizing that our kid is in earshot, that is the shit you pick up around KINDERGARTENERS who are behaving the ways they have been taught to behave by society!! AND we are aware of that and work to combat it every time it comes up we don’t need your fucking concerned advice. i’m going to throttle him
#‘i think she won’t hug me because she’s a misandrist and you’re teaching her to be scared of men’#SHE HAS NEVER BEEN HUGGY!!!#she barely cuddled ME between the ages of 2 and 3#and yes she’s gotten a lot more cuddly w her parents again in the last two years#but YOU! ARE NOT! ONE OF HER PARENTS!!#SHES KNOWN YOU ONE OR TWO YEARS!!!#ofc she won’t hug you you don’t even know her well enough to know that she’s not a fucking hugger#stop acting like you know her better than the people who raised her from infancy#which notably does not even include your partner bc that bitch missed half her toddler hood and has been in and out ever since#one school year of finally committing to a somewhat even custody schedule doesn’t mean yall know BETTER than us#i hate my ex and i hate everyone she associates with#silverstarsvent#silver.chat
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hey bro this isnt funny where did you put my silly detective son
#shuichi saihara#shuichi danganronpa#pregame shuichi#drv3#danganronpa v3#danganronpa v3 pregame#is his name kagehara i forgot#anyways he's not better than ingame shuichi#unless we're using the non toxic aus but if we're using the other ones#yknow the ones where hes a shit friend and partner because he likes danganronpa#the saiouma stuff in pregame aus isnt actually very silly#damn here i go again making everything saiouma#js know i normally hate pregame aus because of how absolutely horrible everyone is in them#aside from the people who are horrible ingame and then theyre written like angels#idk just something about that that really bothers ne#yum its art
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being a kaai yuki fan is awful. i want endearing edutainment-styled songs about cat behaviors that sound like a kid with a cat obsession writing a song about them not this lolicon-styled trendbait SLOP 😭
#LETS ALL KILL OURSELVES. ALL 8 BILLION OF US#IDC IF SHES DEPICTED AS A 15 YEAR OLD IN THE MV THATS NOT MY PROBLEM. MY PROBLEM IS WHY DID WE CHOOSE ONE OF THE ONLY CHILD SAMPLED VSYNTHS#context since i dont post much about vocaloid: popular vocaP made a cringe lolicon song and used a vocalsynth that sampled A 9 Y/O'S VOICE.#IT COULD'VE BEEN ANY OTHER VOCALSYNTH. STILL WOULD'VE BEEN A LITTLE WEIRD MAYBE BUT THIS IS SETTING THE BAR IN HELL#god. i hate it here 😭 the song isnt even that good on its own#like yeah its catchy or whatever but its so clearly made to be trendslop. you will never be mesmerizer#can people be normal about her oh my goddd 😭#i seriously need more of like. lighter themed songs with kaai yuki that are about silly everyday things#like hair slicked back or anything else in that songs album#theres this one kaai yuki cover on youtube of chipi chipi chapa chapa and its CUUUUTE 😭#I LOVE THAT SONG UNIRONICALLY its just about a kid inviting her friends to play at her house. also its a banger#speaking of which. in better news we might be getting teto on the big stage. who cheered and lowkey cried#listen shes been winning so hard these past few years like its been nonstop banger after banger after banger for her.#we wanted for her to sing so many beautiful songs and these vocaPs going crazy with her vsynth are treating her to that dream. YAY ❤️#NOT EVEN JUST HER VSYNTH HER UTAU HAS STILL GOT IT (gestures to medicine)#anyways. i wish kaai yuki could be winning like that.... her voicebank is so unique#the sniffly quality of her voice can be hard to work with but it's endearing and it makes her stand out in another way#anyways. kiyoteru you have permission to kill everyone now#mossball.txt#kaai yuki#ask to tag
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we talk a lot about how before blaine, kurt had never met another gay teen (who was out, that is), and how isolated that made him feel. but what about how the only gay person that kurt knew in real life (as far as we know) was sandy ryerson, a self-proclaimed “predatory gay,” that we're introduced to for the first by seeing him touching a student inappropriately
thinking about how kurt's crush on finn is twisted into some form of harassment even though we only saw him... what? sign him a song? staring at him a bit? introduce their parents to each other, surely as some sort of evil stratagem to get closer to finn and seduce him??? how is that worse than, say, finn – in front of god and everyone –singing i want jessie's girl while circling rachel, or coming up with a scheme to make quinn feel pressured into kissing him?
well i don't think it's worse, but, according to burt, since kurt “wasn't afraid to show” his crush, it makes it more justifiable for finn to sling around slurs (for what will unfortunately not be the last time)
and then kurt's interest in sam and desire to sing a song with him is somehow distorted into him “not understanding that no means no,” even though sam said YES! he ACCEPTED! no means no but sam didn't say it!!!!! and then burt, the one person who's supposed to know kurt better than anyone, agrees with finn, that maybe kurt is being pushy and “taking advantage” of poor sam
“so a gay guy can't be friendly to a straight guy without being predatory?” yes, kurt was attracted to sam and wanted to spend some time with him. but he would never force himself on him in any way. that doesn't matter, though, because even the people who are supposed to be the closest to him, who are supposed to see him for who he is, still don't get him. kurt's treated as if he has some sort of disease or if he's a threat; he's treated as if he's sandy ryerson
similarly, when blaine reveals his crush on sam to tina he feels the need to say “i'm not some predatory gay, so nothing's gonna happen.” and this makes me wonder if blaine has also had previous experiences of crushing on straight boys in the past, and if he was also ostracized for it. even if he hasn't, he clearly knows how society perceives a gay guy crushing on a straight guy
i just hate to think of these two lonely boys being isolated and mistreated for feelings that they can't control, that they don't even plan to act on, and being treated like predators for it

#i'm bad at articulating my thoughts but like. you Get what i mean#hmm this is a bit burt+finn critical but i don't think it's enough for me to use anti tags 🤔#and by no means do i hate burt (my feelings regarding finn are more. Complicated) but just like everyone else he fucks up. and thats okay!!!#i just dislike that he never gets corrected on his assumption (finn does but sam doesn't sing with kurt so it's still a win for him)#i once saw someone (don't remember who SORRY) say that in a better version of the episode instead of the hummelberry duet#sam would be the one to ask kurt to sing with him. and that would have been soo good.#but we have to remember that early s2 is about making kurt as miserable as possible. so no duets with boys until 2x10!! merry christmas#okay i don't know what i'm even saying at this point#glee#kurt hummel#blaine anderson#klaine#meta#<- ehh what the hell Sure#bianca talks
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read the green bone saga this week and i’m just saying. if you want an in-depth political fantasy mafia thriller (yes all of those words apply) set in a post colonial nation that is navigating an unsure global political position and the potential exploitation of its culturally significant resource that simultaneously explores the bonds between family and how they can take different shapes in the wake of loss and love and life, with brilliantly developed, fleshed out characters and realistic pacing (both in world and in the actual delivery of the story). i HIGHLY recommend.
#truly even the characters who do some hateable things are difficult to hate#everyone makes horrible terrible choices but they are all so sympathetic and understandable#i was STRESSED reading these books i tell you#my only comment is i would’ve actually liked to see the last book spread into two books just bc so much happens and i think some of the#characters could’ve used the additional time to be developed and for us to get to know them a little better but ult i have no real complaint#also i wish it was gayer but that’s that#i was really wowed by these books and i read a LOT of fantasy and i don’t like a lot of it so. trust this is a weighty recommendation#fonda lee the woman that you are <3#the green bone saga#jade city#jade war#jade legacy
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I just don't get it. What the actual fuck was so good about these people's lives in 2020 that they wanna go back to that? Everyone was horrified as the pandemic swept America and the government did little to nothing to control it until it was too late. Americans were pariahs in the global community at the personal and the policy level. (And that reputation continued post-2020, because of what happened in 2016.) Inflation was exactly the fucking same. That's what these people are voting for?? What???
Who read project 2025 before going to the polls? I bet if even half of the millions who voted for Trump looked at the thing, enough would have turned against him that this wouldn't have happened (if any woman read that... how, how could you go a long with this?) I just can't. When I get fucking fired as a result of this shit I'm taking out a loan and doing a degree somewhere else. This country is unsalvageable, absolutely unsalvageable.
#why are so many people's hearts so full of hate#I wanna believe in the good in people#It's just so hard when this stuff happens#I don't love the Dems either but this is NOT better it's just NOT and there are only two real options in this stupid system#everyone who's feeling afraid this Nov 6 I'm sending you a big hug let's start a new city state somewhere or something#us politics#Us election#election 2024#Grrrrrr#thank the laurd
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heard an ad on yt that started with a cheerful voice saying "everything's expensive!😀"
like
are we fucking insane???
#do not normalize price gouging the public for infinite growth#someday its going to topple#the world of darkness is consuming everyone like fire and it will burn out someday#but i want it to be now#phuz drabbles#i hate it here#every day people who live somewhere that isnt here say how much better life is#someday soon i want that to be us too.
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“Well yeah, of course it’s not going to be as good as the original show!”
Then why?
Why does this thing exist?
Why does it need to exist in the first place?
This “defense” is not the flex you think it is
If you can’t remake it better
Why remake it at all?
#natla#atla live action#avatar the last airbender#i mean i know why it exists#it exists the same reason all live action remakes exist#because the showrunners hate animation#it’s ‘kids stuff’#clearly WE can do better because this is the ADULT version#it’s live action and we start off with a full blown genocide#OOOOO look at us#we’re the dark and gritty ATLA#even though everyone looks like they’re cosplaying from the cartoon and it’s really fucking jarring#also literally no one was asking for a 1:1 remake#that’s what the idiots who were pissed off about the percy jackson series wanted
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many things i have been keeping under wraps at work, such as pronouns, but also, very critically, age. bc i got that ageless mixed race asian swag where i am very clearly not an undergrad but also??? they just don't know. and it WHIPS and it is so funny to ME because all the managers and shift supervisors are like damn this girl in her mid-twenties is so easy to talk to, it's like talking to a peer. surprise bitch i'm older than you. and maybe this means i'm performing psychological experiments on cis men, but i am ngl if i hand you a two page resume that you don't read, it is simply none of MY business if you think i am in my mid-20s. they are going to be so mad when they find out lmao
#mild work crush i fear....his undefinable possibly autistic certainly overworked jock swag has captured the nation#i can't remember if he was the one who jumpscared the managers by just randomly showing up with a wife and baby one day#when they thought he was a confirmed bachelor#it might have been the other shift supervisor who hates talking to people#it def wasn't the business school supervisor bc that guy is tasing himself recreationally while getting an mba. idiot <3#i love my job it is so boring and so entertaining at the same time. it's like the perfect balance of annoying and enriching#i wrote an entire fic at work once. and was still able to do everything i needed to do. and heard an absolutely bananas story#from the housekeeper about suing the city#i love the housekeeper every 3rd word out of her mouth i'm like ma'am are we allowed to say that in 2025 😭#i wish i could work there forever but i cannot. and when i quit the fic and/or zine i write/make about is going to go CRAZYYYYY#i think i text like 5-8 different people at least once a week about stupid shit i witnessed at work and the hot guys also#cannot forget the hot guys. so many hot guys. and they are all so stupid and annoying and sometimes charming also#i wish i could wear shorts to work bc my ass looks great rn from strength training#unfortunately my uniform is athleisure wear that doesn't fit and a free flyers sweatshirt that also doesn't fit lmao#when i learn to dress myself. it's over for you hoes#was talking to my strength trainer this week bc they asked if they could use me as a case study for trauma informed something#i kind of wasn't listening bc i just started talking immediately about the emotional effects of not having severe chronic back pain#and now being stronger has made me at its very base just more confident and kind to myself (inasmuch as i'll ever be)#bc i know my body better and i'm not scared of it and i can predict how it moves and i can trust it in ways i could not before#just from not knowing it? like even beyond the chronic pain i just did not know how my body moved and what it was capable of#& how one thing that is so silly but so nice is the feeling of being attractive as MYSELF for the first time in my life and not just#a vehicle for everyone to project whatever weird mpdg stuff on. and it's NICE and it's FUN that i know how my body moves as itself!!#like idk is finding confidence in my body the poetry. the strength training. the being in my 30s. the being too tired to care anymore#WHO KNOWS. none of my business#in conclusion. i would love to say i haven't been having a five stage mental breakdown all week but i have but i think it finally resolved#and now i have a new bed courtesy of sierra and kelly!!!!#and after i find out how much i owe in 1st/last month's rent? it's cricut time#ok good night#fresno oilers.txt
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