#bc its something teen me really needed to hear but never did

[harpieisthecarpie]

Harp™️ Life Tip: if your reaction to stories about what it's like being neurodivergent or queer is "Okay but why's this a big deal? Everyone has these experiences", you should examine those thoughts because often

✨️ They Do Not ✨️

I used to think the concept of being nonbinary was kind of dumb because "everyone thinks of themselves in gender neutral pronouns. everyone takes a second to respond when someone calls them 'ma'am/sir'. everyone fails to realize they're being referred to when someone says 'he/she'. everyone hates their birth name. everyone feels horribly uncomfortable with the structure of their body and how it is perceived"

Until I talked to cisgender people about those totally universal experiences and found out

✨️ No, They Do Not ✨️

I used to think ADHD wasn't that big of a deal because "everyone has a terrible memory. everyone has a terrifyingly strong sense of justice. everyone makes mental connections like a frantic conspiracy cork board. everyone is desperately afraid of rejection. everyone easily falls into 'obsessions' and 'flow'. it's hard for everyone to start tasks early and follow through with long projects. everyone clings to good things until all the good is sucked dry. "

These beliefs hurt me horribly because I would compare myself to people who weren't dealing with my ADHD and mental illness, and wonder why I was failing compared to them. Maybe I was just lazy, and I was smart but had no drive. Maybe my teachers were right and I was just a "big fish is a small pond" that would suffer because I was too complacent to study. Maybe I was at fault for all of the ways that I suffered. Maybe I wasn't truly suffering at all. Maybe I was the problem.

But then I got diagnosed and had to accept the knowledge that

✨️ No, I Was Not ✨️

My experiences were different from my peers, and trying to force myself to work like them, to be like them, would never work. My experiences weren't universal, and I had to learn how to accomodate for it. I had to learn to embrace it.

So, long story short: It's scary to realize your experiences are not the socially-approved norm. And sometimes it's easier to bury parts of yourself than accept them,

But those stories, those other lived experiences, are proof that you're not in this alone.

[hamiltonaf]

hey pretty, hope u okay! if it's possible, could u write something for lewis? they have been best friends since 15 after meeting in karts (the reader is a Ferrari driver) lewis has been in love w her since the day they match, but never say something bc he is afraid of losting her. the reader got out of her last relationship and they became close again and one night they just get together and end up confessing their love to both of them. this can be a social media or not, what u prefer, thank u 🤍 (and sorry about the english, it's not my first language)

Icebreaker | Lewis Hamilton

{SOCIAL MEDIA AU}

Pairing: Lewis Hamilton x BFF ! Reader

Warnings: None just major fluff

A/N: Hello my loves ! My first SMAU, I hope I did it justice. Hope you guys enjoy this as much as I did. Requests are open .xo

yourusername

Liked by lewishamilton, charlesleclerc and 638 293 others

yourusername Summer break dump

View all 9,857 comments

user1 Forget about being a wag, I wanna be a HAB !!!!

user2 That boyfriend of hers has nooooo idea how lucky he is..

teamlh SIRRR we see you in the likes

user3 The fact that he liked this 1 min after posting… post notifications are ONNNN

user4 We NEED Lewis & Y/N content ASAPPPP

user5 Charles is 100% reading these comments

yourusername added to their story

yourusername deleted their story

lewishamilton

Liked by yourusername, fencer, 13thwitness and 992 739 others

lewishamilton For old times sake 😉 yourusername

View all 38 616 comments

teamlh OH MY DAYS

user5 THEY WENT KARTING TOGETHER

user6 I’m not okay.

teamyourname besties reunited awwwww

yourusername I think you forgot to mention the part where I won 😌

lewishamilton Okay fine 😪

user7 I’m CRYING ^^ go QUEEENNNNN !!!! I love her sm 🥹🩷

yourusername

Liked by charlesleclerc, lewishmailton, fencer and 1 091 512 others

yourusername Best weekend yet 🤍 Finally faced my fears 🥹😭

View all 92 738 comments

lewishamilton So proud of you ❤️

yourusername All thanks to you 🥰

user1 Are they flirting on main ? 👀

lewhamilton He took her skydiving 😭😭😭 I’m not crying

lhamiltoncrew So are we just going to ignore the sneaky last pic that Y/N posted ??????? 🥹 SO CUTE

fansofyourname Its been a while since we saw Y/N this happy 🥹 Lew is so good for her

user2 Her ex really fumbled 🤪

user3 I’m so glad he didn’t, otherwise when was this ship gonna sail ? 👀

user4 Oh it’s DEFINITELY sailing honey 😏

lewishamilton and yourusername

Liked by yourusername, charlesleclerc, georgerussell and 1 892 738 others

lewishamilton Champagne showers 😜

View all 45 749 comments

yourusername Thanks for that, I can’t hear now. Merc strategy 🧐 FIA needs to look into this

lewishamilton Forgive me 🥺❤️

yourusername Hmm…I’ll think about it 🤔

lewishamilton I’m sitting right next to you 🙃

user1 These 2 ^^^ I’m DEAD 💀

yournamehamilton THEY ARE DATING 100%

charlesleclerc Thanks for cropping me out 🙂

yourusername 😇😇😇

georgerussell Congrats yourusername 😌

yourusername and lewishamilton

Liked by lewishamilton, 13thwitness, fencer, charlesleclerc and 2 029 938 others

yourusername Mi amore 🤍

View all 69 838 comments

lewishamilton ❤️❤️❤️

fanofyourusername OH MY GOD 😱

lewhamilton Talk about hard launch 🤩

user1 Who wrote their love story 😭😭😭

ferarrifangirl From rivals since they were teens to lovers 😩 Y/N stays WINNING

charlesleclerc Called it 😌

yourusername Ariana, what are you doing here 🫣

user2 They were meant for each other all along 🥹

LH44crew It’s beyond me how Y/N never noticed the way he used to look at her 😭😭😭

hamiltonyourname Find yourself a man that looks at you like Sir Lewis Hamilton 😩

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

too many teens whining for validation, this blog needs more weird and stupid so...

AITA for kidnapping my friend and trapping her in the cheesebarn?

Hear me out:

The story starts about a week before my (20 at the time ftm) 21st birthday. If you live in the US you know this isnt just some lame 7th birthday or 36th birthday, this is one of the big boy birthdays, the special ones. Its when you can legal buy alcohol and are therefore truly an adult in the eyes of the law.

Naturally my friends (20s) wanted to do something Big for our 21sts. So they asked me what i wanted to do and i said i didnt really care as long as I got a road trip somewhere with friends.

Everyone thought it was a fun idea but it was a little short notice for everyone to get time off from work, but my other friend we will call C also had her 21st exactly a month after mine to the day, and the two of us agreed to share our 21sts and not do much of anything on my actual birthday. This is important, bc it was a SHARED birthday road trip.

I agree to let C pick the destination and I provide the car. We didnt have much of a plan as we were going to meet up with C's old roommate who lives in the city we picked to show us a good time.

It was 5 of us total and about a 7 hour drive altogether there with not a whole lot on the way there. We get to the city she picked and meet the roommate and honestly the rest of this part is just standard 21st birthday shenanigans. Its when we start the drive home things really start.

Remember its a long drive with not much to see? Well that was a lie. On our way back we see it, the Real "Happiest Place on Earth" as far as places with a mouse for a mascot go:

Grandpa's.

Fuckin'.

Cheesebarn.

Obviously me and the other people on the trip want to stop and see the magic, but unfucking fortunately C happens to be the only Basic White Girl ™️ in the entire world who hates cheese and isnt even lactose intolerant. This girl is notorious for making "petty" and "I hate Cheese" her entire personality. She would constantly make faces and gagging noises and talk about how gross and nasty cheese is if you so much as eat a grilt cheese near her.

Clearly she made it known that she wasnt on board with it. "NO! FUCK YOU ALL IM NOT GOING TO A PLACE CALLED A CHEESEBARN ON MY BIRTHDAY!!" were her exact words.

But i remembered i was driving, it was my car, and it was supposed to be my birthday too. So I put it to a vote. "Raise your hand if you wanna go to Grandpa's Cheesebarn!"

All hands raise but one. With C out voted we head to the cheesebarn.

Guys. This place is amazing. Its obviously making cheese its main draw, but yhere's so much more, its every shitty midwest tourist trap rolled into one glorious place. There's even a chocolate shop. We even got C's roommate to ditch work and come meet us bc shr heard "Grandpa's Cheesebarn" and knew she had to drop everything.

All in all a good visit, C even seemed like she had fun once we got there (she sure spent $300 on candies and dip mixes anyway). We go home. Things seem fine.

Then C drops off the face of the earth.

She wont respond to our calls or texts and at first we thought maybe she was giing through a rough patch or something and try to just keep reaching out but give her space. But then we find out that not only is she still hanging our with our other friends who couldnt make the trip with us. So clearly she's just pissed at us about something.

Finally one day a few months later i catch her at her job and just tell her "I dont care if you hate us, we'll never speak to you again if you dont want us to, but what the hell did we do to you??"

And she just looked me over and says "Well. You kidnapped me."

lolwut

And she yells (bc this girl loves yelling at people) "YOU KIDNAPPED ME AND TRAPPED ME AT A CHEESEBARN ON. MY. BIRTHDAY!!!!!"

And i just said "Well it was my birthday too," and havent spoken to her since. Its been over a decade and "No ragrets" as we said back in the day, but uts baffled me for years that that was her reaction. "Im just over you guys" i can understand, and its not like she was shy about telling people she hates them and their out of her life ever before. And from what i ended up hearing from our other friends she kept talking with it really was about the cheesebarn and how we "ruined her birthday".

No but srsly AITA??? For making her go to a cheesebarn???

What are these acronyms?

[fisherpiers]

Hunter coming out to Luz as bi

OKAY here i am like over 6 months later LMAO

like whattt? im not dead?? i know, i know. my deepest apologies

i have already written him coming out in flapjacks with syrup so if you want more go read that too not to self promote agskgjjghh (i will be updating that soon just saying 👀)

but here’s some headcanons!

lemme see, theres so many ways for this to go. lets entertain just a couple tho lol

scenario #1

its july and luz is getting/making pride merch for everyone bc shes trying to make it a thing on the isles. at least a little holiday. perhaps a parade? itll be fun!

and she realizes she has no clue what hunters deal is. is he straight? aroace, maybe. that guy is married to his work.

shes trying to keep this pride thing a surprise so she asks him nonchalantly like “hey broooo i was just wondering. whats your sexuality. a friend wanted to know.”

and he bluescreens

“uh. i— i dont know, actually.”

he never really thought about it. hes always been too busy being attracted to them books lmao

he has to get back to her in two business days at least 😂😂😂

he basically spends those days spacing out and scaring his classmates by intensely staring at them.

hunter discovers that he generally feels the same about any gender. and he didnt really have a preference when imagining his future having a wife, husband, or partner. as long as they made him happy

and everyone was really pretty. hexside had quite a lot of cute witches and demons

but honestly, he still didn’t really find himself wanting to start a relationship with any of them (gee wonder why)

he chalks it up to the fact that he’s focusing on his studies and apprenticeship right now and has no time for romance

besides, if he had a partner, he’d have even less time to spend with luz his friends

he finds luz up in a tree behind the owl house, nose in a book. shes so focused on the story that she doesn’t even hear him approach

“LUZ!”

“WHA—“

she was so startled she fell put of the tree. hunter tried to catch her he really did but they both wound up crashing down to the ground in a heap

oof

luz shoved him off her, laughing “first you give me a heart attack and now you try to crush me? i thought we were friends now, hunter!”

“sorry, sorry,” he wheezed as he rolled over in the soft grass

luz went and retrieved her book from where she accidentally threw it, “so what did you need me for?”

“oh, i just wanted to tell you i think i figured out my sexuality now, like you asked,”

“thats okay. i didnt mean to presure you so you dont have t—”

he sat up, “im bisexual,”

liz gasped “OH SWEET, twinsies!”

she got matching bandanas for them. cowboy vibes lol

luz did successfully get the annual pride parade set up in the isles. hard to say no to her shes a force of nature and also kinda a celebrity now ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

scenario #2

luz has just assumed he’s gay

bc they often talk about guys they think are cute. like if theyre at the mall food court (without the hexsquad) and see any hot guys they are thoroughly checking them out and giggling like school girls

its not something she can do with amity (obviously), vee or willow. plus, she trusts that hunter isnt about to go squealing to her girlfriend about her attraction to men she has no plans on pursuing

its a good bonding activity, okay. if you cant thirst over cute guys with your bestie are they really your bestie

alas, because of this, luz never reads too much into the moments they have together. hunter let a hug linger a little too long? he lets her eat off his fork? puts his arm around her on the couch? just friendly behavior. its not like he likes her or anything. bc hes gay right

anyway. theyre like, at a chinese restaurant picking up takeout for the gang and the cashier is just adorable. miss teen connecticut. the cutest girl ever. they both stutter their words and awkwardly fumble around while picking up this order. hunter almost dropped the food and luz signed her name as Liz Noda on the receipt

they get out of there and start laughing once they reach the car

“guess its bi disaster hour am i right?” hunter joked

luz laughed but then it hit her

“wait. you like girls?”

hunter looked at her confused, “yeah?”

“oh…” she trails off,

and hunter starts the car and drives off, not even giving the conversation a second thought

meanwhile luz is dead silent in the passenger seat like

she be rethinking everything agsjfjjhh

OKAY SECRET 3RD SCENARIO!

tboy!luz au :3

okay so luz is scared bc he’s finally worked out his gender. he’s a guy.

its what pushes him to break up with amity. its amicable at least

and so as luz moves on with his life, and starts falling for hunter, he’s scared hunter wont like him now bc he’s trans

and once hunter finds out about that, he’s putting a stop to it fast. like:

“dude. im bi. i dont care if youre a boy or a girl. youre luz. and i like luz.”

and they live happily ever after the end agajdjjg

[jackfrombaskinrobbins]

daredevil fam x teen!intern!reader [pt. 1]

CLICK HERE FOR PT. 2

type of writing: headcanons / scenario

word count: 1.5k

request: yes / no

original request: DYING over your matt post– i'm a sucker for casual family hcs with teen readers, it's always the cutest !! could i request something similar like the whole team (nelson, murdock, & page) taking care of an intern? just a teen who usually takes care of filing ends up wandering into the whole found family dynamic they have set up? thanks !

dynamic: daredevil fam (nelson murdock & page) x teen!intern!reader

characters: reader, matt murdock, foggy nelson, karen page

a/n: hiii tysm for this request!!! i love found family hc's too -- especially with daredevil bc i feel like i haven't seen many :( if y'all ever have more daredevil requests like this i would be more than happy to write them!!

taglist: @nutellani @thecloudedmind

(fill out this form if you'd like to be on my taglist!!)

-----------------------✰----------------------

your school had an internship program.

basically, during the last few weeks of the year, everyone in your grade was matched up with a company to go be interns!

and sometimes that led to summer jobs which was cool

anyways so you were pretty excited

you had been looking forward to getting your assignment for a while now.

you had told the people who assigned the internships that you were interested in law, and you were holding out for a good assignment

but you were kind of worried because a lot of people were interested in law as well

so finally the day came

and you were confused to see someplace called “nelson, murdock, and page” listed there

like who the heck were these people

even worse, a couple of the really egocentric & mean kids got internships at landman & zack.

LANDMAN & ZACK

and they were really rubbing it in.

“y/n, where did you get assigned?”

“uh.. nelson, murdock, and page.”

“huh, never heard of them. i got assigned to landman and zack!!! aren’t you happy for me?”

blech

anyway the first day that you were supposed to go came finally

the one upside to being assigned to nelson, murdock, and page was that it was fairly close to where you lived

like only a block or two!!

you honestly weren’t sure what to bring so you kind of overpacked

well not crazy but still

you probably wouldn’t need three packs of pencils AND two staplers

but hey, this was new york! anything could happen.

you took a deep breath as you walked in, and as you approached the door, you could hear what sounded like an argument inside.

“listen karen, i’m not gonna take it anymore! the shamrock shake is gross!!”

btw i agree with that statement not that it’s relevant but still its nasty spearmint is blech

oop back to what i was writing

“foggy, you’re wrong. it’s what really makes spring for me!!”

“hey, you two. there’s someone outside.”

and just like that, the two who were arguing turned to face the door. 

you gave a sheepish wave, embarrassed that you hadn’t just walked in.

“aw, no way!! are you the intern? uhm… your name… uh..” said the shamrock shake hater

“y/n.” said another man, the peacekeeper, it seemed. 

you had remembered the internship assigner telling you one of the lawyers was blind

and judging by the red glasses, this was the one.

“yeah, that’s me. you must be murdock… i think.”

“call me matt.” he said, extending a hand for you to shake.

then the woman, (shamrock shake lover), also extended her hand.

“i’m karen. it’ll be nice to have someone new around here!!”

“yeah”, said the shamrock shake hater, “nice to have someone to do all the filing!”

“oh.. filing?” you asked, brow furrowing. 

you could feel yourself deflating a little bit.

“don’t worry, there’ll be plenty of interesting stuff for you to do y/n.” matt spoke, a small smile on his face.

“foggy, how about you show them how to do it?” karen said right after, pointing at shamrock shake hater.

foggy, now.

“aw, karen!! you know i’m no good at filing!!”

“that’s a lie. you just pretend to be bad at it to get out of doing it.” karen replied, and matt nodded.

a big dramatic sigh from foggy

“al-RIGHT, al-RIGHT! jeez. c’mon y/n. seems like we have work to do!!”

you couldn’t help but laugh bc these people were ridiculous

in a good way

at least for now!

turns out foggy WAS good at filing

and apparently you were too!!

he made a game out of it to see who could unlock the cabinet & put the folder in the right spot first

and not to brag, but you always won :) 

he even bet his lunch that you couldn’t beat his time!

“don’t mess with them, foggy. i think they’ve shown they can run circles around you.” karen laughed as he challenged you

and yet he still did it!!!

and you won!!!!!!!!!!!

!!!!!!!!!!!!

so you had a delicious sandwich & chips for lunch courtesy of foggy nelson :D 

the rest of the day was pretty nice too

like most of it was filing but matt told you about some of the cases they were working on

and karen was so sweet like y’all were gossiping fr

she told you about all the crazy stuff that happened at the firm

and honestly, you were so glad you had been assigned to this firm

because were the people at landman & zack having this much fun???

no i don’t think so!!!

plus it helped that they all hated landman and zack too

foggy told you all about how stuffy and uptight everyone was there

so it was kind of a relief!

-----------------------✰----------------------

I HAD TO DO THIS IN TWO PARTS SO HERE'S THE SECOND ONE

CLICK THIS FOR PT. 2

[narcissusbrokenmirror]

Alex Mercer + catholic trauma really does something for me, i like reading fanfics abt it cuz it feels like home. shout out to all the projecting Alex writers out there.But i think its funny how inaccurate it is. not in a bad way ofc. But i have thoughts about 90's gay teen Alex. I need to get them out. But i think its funny how inaccurate it is. not in a bad way ofc. But i have thoughts about 90's gay teen Alex. I need to get them out.

I mean its the 90's, religion is not the only thing making people homophobic there, besides toxic masculinity being pretty much a thing, there was also the post aids moment, so despite the 90's not being the most homophobic era ever, gay people were like, a presence, on the social groups, especially on the art/acting/music scene. so, for me, it makes sense when Kenny Ortega says Alex was a proud character of his identity as a gay young man.

doesn't add up to me tho, being gay + proud + christian + in the 90's. like, you dont grow up proud of being queer if u spend your life hearing negative rhetoric about it. so i, personally, don't think Alex's family was religious.

Alex's family doesn't look religious and Alex doesn't seem into it, as well. Alex being confident, proud, relaxed and sarcastic brings me to think that he came from a very liberal family that was also homophobic. picture this with me.

the grunge/rock scene is full of people trying to make into a club that only people who look a certain way can be there, they're full of toxic masculinity behavior there. Alex's not like it, he knows better that rock is much more about expressing yourself through music and feeling with others, rather than how you look, you knows its bullshit. and im only mentioning this bc Alex doesn't dress like alt ppl usually do, he's always in this relaxed outfit, the same black sweatpants and different soft colored shirts and jackets, he doesn't put an effort to how he looks, he just wants to be comfortable. and not caring how you look as long as ur comfortable? rock behavior ig

Alex being confident and proud tells us about the background he came from. If his family considered him trustworthy and let Alex make his own choices without interfering even if they don't like it, certainly he did NOT came from a religious household.

Alex is a drummer, that shit expensive for you to just have a whole kit hanging around, so his parents probably got it for him, they supported his band and let him have his friends around, they were warm and loving, helping into building Alex's sense of self worth, which is very nice.

so we don't have anything concrete abt Alex's past relationships, but i guess he first came out to his band and then his parents, Luke says Alex never had a boyfriend, but Alex being so certain that he was having a mutual connection with Willie would feel weird if it was the first time Alex flirted with a guy. nah. He probably did met other gay boys on clubs and concerts, flirted, made out once or twice, maybe even gone on dates, you know, teenager things.

the shit happened when he came out to his parents and they gave him the cold shoulder and silence treatment. because they had reasons to not want their son to be gay. Gay people were seen as dirty, sick, perverted, pedophiles, promiscuous and also a target for violence. As a parent, they wouldn't want his son that they loved and supported so much to be associated with such a marginalized group. But it's their son, after all, they couldn't throw him away. So they didn't locked Alex away from his friends, wasn't thrown out of his house, wasn't forced to get that "fixed up". Because Alex was their son, but they didn't want that part of him there, they didn't wanted to know about it.

Alex having his friends over would always click a question on his parents' mind for what if they aren't just friends, what can they be doing together when they're not looking (bc you know, gay people dont have feelings or connections, its all about the sex), what else could Alex's dad think when he sees Luke sneaking out of Alex's room wearing his shirt? and the problem is centered around it happening near to them, whatever Alex does outside their roof is his business, but his homosexuality is not welcome on the Mercer's house. Although, they didn't felt comfortable around Alex anyway, bc inside their heads, they knew that he couldn't keep his homosexuality off when they were together. they couldn't process that their son would be a homosexual, they couldn't love that, they could love their son, but not that.

Alex probably knew that, probably thought that it would eventually stop and they would be normal, warm and loving again, that they would support him again, probably because he didn't had his parents' love hold against some condition, as if he had to earn it. (As it is pretty common in religious households) It doesn't mean he wouldn't get hurt from it, he did and it was a lot, the lack of love, attention and support that he got from his came out, after a life of being given proper dosis of love and being allowed to be who he was. By the way Alex deals with changes, that shit was probably getting to his head.

Alex knew he deserved better than being treated like that, he knew he deserved his family to love him bc they always did and that they shouldn't define him by one element that would always be a part of him, he knew he deserved it to be a part of his life, deserved to bring a nice guy he met home to meet his parents instead of sneaking them in and out like he had to live it secretly. He didn't wanted that, it wasn't fair to him. He shouldn't have to feel ashamed enough to hide it from his dad bc his dad shouldn't want him to be ashamed of himself.

Alex was decided to stop caring about his parents thought of him, even if it meant them not being a part of his life, not that he wanted it this way, bc he didn't. But if they could change once, they could change again.

[numetaljackdog]

what i'm listening to 8/5/2023 (SKAUGUST SPECIAL) (song notes under cut)

spot. link⬛⬜⬛⬜⬛yt link

bonjour tout la monde :3 i see you're all working on that first course...... perhaps you'd like another? :3c

now. this is no ordinary WILT. bc as i've mentioned i have been absolutely INFECTED by the skaucous skanking energy of SKAUGUST!!!! i might do a mini-WILT later in the month with some other stuff i've been listening to, but for now this is an ENTIRELY SKA playlist ^w^ well...... almost entirely. there is one exception, of course....

Laura Les - Skaunted: it's skaunted. by laura les. i really did try to find a ska cover for this but as far as i can tell there is none. get on that, people.

Streetlight Manifesto - Everything Went Numb: very likely my favorite ska song i've ever heard, this one's been with me for a good few years now. there's just such a drama to it, lots of storytelling gravitas rather than just a fun pop song. and the HOOKS they cram into this thing, good lord. the rapid-fire lyrics and layered horn section and difference in dynamics all work so well together.... i always find myself running through the part "i don't wanna hear, i don't wanna be near, i do what i gotta do, just to keep my nose clean" over and over and over again. that and the quiet part "a little something like this, na na na na na na, na na na na na na na" i've never heard a band that made na na na's work as well as these guys, and you can take that as an insult to whichever pop punk band you like if you really want, but one way or another this is a fucking golden track and you HAVE(!!!) to listen to it at least once okay?

No Doubt - Just A Girl: probably one of the most if not just the absolute most commercially and culturally successful moments that ska has had..... and it's not hard to see why. this song is a fucking ALL TIME crusher, it's got hooks for days, the little synth part is all crunchy, it's a bona fide feminist pop anthem, and, if we can all take a second to be real with ourselves here, gwen stefani is an excellent performer for stuff like this. i have no trouble imagining young teen girls in 1995 seeing this shit on mtv for the first time and having their lives and brain chemistries irreversibly changed. this and spiderwebs but there's only so much room in the playlist, folks

Madness - One Step Beyond: considering what we still have yet to get to in this list, it's a real testament to how much i instantly loved this one that it's placed so high. it's goofy as shit but it represents so many things i love about 2 tone. first of all, the just intrusively obvious british lameness of it is quite charming, and also just really interesting from a historical perspective. as we'll see, a lot of 2nd wave ska bands hailed from the uk, likely bc of the genre's connections with new wave, which began largely as a british export. and then with third wave ska, the usa became the new hub of ska music, but i feel like that british influence remained a crucial part of the way ska presented itself even then. very interesting, if you're as big a nerd as me. i feel like this is also a tune where you can hear some of ska's jazz influences, which is awesome to think how this revival movement for jamaican dance music not only preserved its basic rhythm structure but also some of its influences. i ALSO like that it hardly has any words - they were just like here's some of the tastiest fucking riffs you've ever heard and a guy yelling "ONE STEP BEYOND" what else do you need? and i was like nothing 😌 you've given me all i need you bunch of goofy suited skanksters

Catch 22 - 9mm and a Three Piece Suit: i see this one as sort of a companion to everything went numb, which makes sense bc streetlight manifesto actually covered the entirety of keasbey nights at one point. 9mm predates streetlight's stuff by a good number of years, and i do prefer the roughness of the original version. it's more of that very fast-paced storytelling type of songwriting, and i've had this song with me for several years as well. not really much i can say about it that wouldn't be repetitious, but definitely love this one to death as well

Choking Victim - Crack Rock Steady: coming from a background of hardcore heavier music, it makes me so happy that people saw the rise of ska punk and said yeah man we need a way to make this all heavy and nasty too. and we'll sing about killing cops. and they did! ^w^ and so enter the creators of a genre named after this very song (though by my understanding of its influences it could have easily been called "crust ska" - but that wouldn't have been a fun pun now would it?). i just love that you could easily get up and skank to this song, it's very upbeat and lively, but it is also VERY about killing cops. like there is no mistaking that this is cop killing song from first lyric to last. so that's dope. or i guess it's crack

The Specials - A Message to You Rudy: the specials cover an enduring jamaican ska classic... it's a tale as old as time. i love the arrangement on this soooo much, and the pretty and subtle harmonizations. this is almost kind of a dreamy song to me, the way it just floats through the air. that has more to do with the base melody itself, but i do like the dandy livingstone original a lot as well! once again, only so much room on the playlist. the specials join madness as the two bands that i would deem most prominent and influential in the second wave, but i think the specials were a little less new wave and had some more of the original ska spirit in them. not a dis on madness, of course, i've already expressed my enjoyment of them. just an interesting difference between the two

Rancid - Time Bomb: just a girl might be ska's big moment for a lot of people, but for ME, it was time bomb. i heard this one on the radio as a kid, and it was one of the first ska songs i was exposed to, and i LOVE IT. it's definitely a little basic but it just epitomizes the phrase "ska punk" to me. so guitar-forward and with super rough vocals but also so fun and real and bouncy with an absolutely endlessly repeatable chorus. i love you time bomb

We Are The Union - Morbid Obsessions: oh, i'm sorry. did you think i was gonna make a list of my current ska favorites and NOT include a selection from we are the union's 2021 album ordinary life which documents the lead singer's journey and self-discovery? well you thought fucking wrong, dumdum!!!!!!!!!!! this was such a big album for me when i was. uh. how old was i in 2021. when i was like seventeen. i would almost go so far as to say that this album was my "transgender dysphoria blues" if not for the fact that i was also listening to that album a lot around the same time. there were some discoveries happening. but anyways this is such a great little album, i really recommend the whole thing. chewy tasty indie pop with a delightful ska base. and the band even has jer (of skatune network fame) on trombone!! how cool is that!!!! also AGAIN i kept it to only one song but if you only check out one other track from this record, listen to the closer "december." that shit makes me cry

Smash Mouth - Walkin' On The Sun: I'LL ADMIT IT. THIS IS ONE OF SEVERAL TIMES THAT I'M GOING TO CHEAT ON THIS WILT. in the sense that this isn't really a ska song - it's a song by a ska band, and has some ska flavor in there as an influence. can you evar forgive me 🥺 but also like. look. it's fuckin smash mouth, okay. and this song is Loaded with them fucking HOOKS babeyyyyy. and it really is interesting, how smash mouth managed to be so commercially successful that they really existed as a goofy corporate pop rock band that had a couple big all-quadrants hits. but like you can feel that they have background in "The Scene." you can practically smell the punk on these guys, the same way you can smell the nu metal on sugar ray. these are always bands that used to be Something Else and that Something Else is undeniably cooler than what they are now, but what they are now is definitely catchier. so. walkin' on the sun! i like this better than all star, for the record, but it could also be a matter of overplay on the latter's part

The Selecter - On My Radio: this and one other song we'll get to are like the epitome to me of how second wave ska had huge crossover with new wave. the first time i heard this one i was kinda like ehhh yeah it's cool i guess. and then after a couple more listens i realized how well constructed of a song it is, and how great the performances are. the lead vocalist here is a real treat, apparently some people call her the "queen of ska" which is fucking awesome. also i love a good song about a radio, especially in retrospect now where it's like eh yeah you darned kids had better learn about what's what on the radio bc back in my day-

Operation Ivy - Sound System: this is like, the birthplace of ska punk/third wave. okay maybe not this particular album, but you could certainly make an argument for that early op ivy ep! point is, they were on the ground floor, and sound system is definitely the catchiest song i've heard from them. and, not dissimilar to songs about radios, i can get behind a song about a sound system! love it! honestly, despite being rough and punky, this song's almost... cute? like aw :) the sound system is the one thing he can depend on. i'm glad he has that kind of relationship in his life!

Less Than Jake - Nervous In The Alley: LTJ is the first ska band that i really became a fan of, probably bc of how accessible they are, particularly to the typical pop punk or skate punk enjoyer. they have three songs in this playlist that i have enough history with to warrant including but i don't have much to say about any of them. the fast part of this song is the best part, obviously

The (English) Beat - Mirror In the Bathroom: it's so funny to me that they're called the english beat but only sometimes. sometimes it's just the beat. i understand why but it amuses me. anyways THIS is the total new wave song i mentioned, and like with on my radio i didn't really "get it" at first. but man, what a track. not only does it have great composition and a delightful balance of new wave polish and ska beat, it's also just kind of a unique concept for a pop song. self-obsession pushed to the point of madness, framed entirely through the listing of different common objects one can look at themselves in while carrying out everyday business. just an interesting little chune :3

Less Than Jake - Bomb Drop: honestly this one could probably go higher i fucking love bomb drop. but once again i don't have much to say about it. i will say that i didn't realize until watching the music video while making this list that this is apparently about like, cyberbullying? the video's kind of lame honestly, but the intentions are good. i've had this song so long i forgot how recent it is, but i guess it's a testament to how consistent LTJ has stayed, and perhaps as a consequence, how little they've changed. you could send this song back to 1998 and apart from the slightly slicker production nobody would bat an eye

Derrick Morgan - Tougher Than Tough (Rudie in Court): had to get at least one first wave song that wasn't a 2 tone cover in here, right? this is another classic that earns the title of "rude boy anthem." without getting too serious, i do think there's something to be said about rude boys' existence as a subculture and the way that blends with the punk ethos later but also how the term exists more in isolation in jamaican ska. as the title suggests, there's definitely an element of getting into trouble here - was that something that inspired the revival of ska at the hands of rock bands later on? i can't say. but i think about it

The Aquabats! - The Shark Fighter!: if i'm 100% honest i don't tend to really like the aquabats. i wish i did but i don't. but this song is sooooo catchy. i did watch the full episode of the super show that the song appears in (which is in the youtube playlist btw) and it was some campy fun but not anything that made me want to watch more. what i will say is that not long ago i was rewatching robbydude's vods of reel fishing: road trip adventure, a vod series that contained a lot of ska references (not the least of which relate to the title and the continued botching of it to instead say "reel big fishing"). but one of the bits was that every time he went to catch a hammerhead he would play this song. so now it's lodged in my head forever. go make the same happen for yourself

Less Than Jake - Goodbye in Gasoline: some b-side action for you. the video for this one that i have in the youtube playlist is so funny, it's from SUPER early youtube and it's just a bunch of stupid random pictures over a low-quality mp3 of the song. there's only two comments and they're both people being like "this is dumb why did you make this." as far as i'm concerned this may as well be the official music video for goodbye in gasoline

Rancid - Hooligans: HOOLIGANS! rancid! RUDE BOYS! rancid! HOOLIGANS! rancid! RUDE BOYS! rancid! on a loop forever in my mind

Lazy Town - We Are Number One: once again i am super cheating bc this shouldn't count as a bonus track really, it's just not on spotify anymore. so whatever there's 20 songs, sue me. i don't need to introduce you to this song but what i do have to say is MAN is this a banger or what?! like yeah it's a kid's song and yeah it's a meme, but i really do love it! i've never seen an episode of lazy town in my life! i remember a tomska & friends video where they did a meme review of the 2010s and tom (who, as you may guess, is a noted ska fan) picked this song for 2018 or whatever fuckin year this blew up, but he noted that while he didn't really have very strong feelings about it one way or another, he had to take the opportunity to be excited that a ska song had become popular online. i can respect that. rest in peace of course to the actor who played robbie rotten, he seemed like a nice man and i'm glad we all are preserving something he worked on so passionately :)

wouaghhh. so that was the skaugust special!!!! thanks for reading, i hope your love of ska is improved by the work we've done here :3 i feel the need to give thanks to the wonderful violet of the gec (hi :3), fellow musicgirl and the creator of skaugust, because. oh man. i have not felt this energized to listen to and talk about music in MONTHS. in case you were confused about the thing i said about a first course earlier, go check out vi's batch of songs for some more certified bangers. do it NOW. okay thankies see you next month ^w^

[salaciousslut]

I love hearing what other ppl like so please do!! I also like R&B a lot i just forgot to mention it when i was talking abt genres i like earlier bc i was too focused on rap 🤭 and im the same way tbh! Unless im a real big fan of an artist i'll wait a while, but sometimes like with Paramore's After Laughter i couldnt stand to accept the sound change so i waited a year to listen to it 🫣

I'm going out in an hour or two and im probably not gonna drink till i get back home late. Im always DD since i live the furthest. I wish you could come out with me and my friends i feel like you'd have fun with us. But my friends usually get crossfaded with me bc i always bring some weed. im ok to drive when its worn off a bit im safe i promise 🫣 but i drop everyone off so im used to getting home late a lot. I wish i could hear you giggling i bet you have a cute laugh sweetheart<3 i bet youre really fun to be around when you're drunk<3

I do the same but im trying to get back into better habits like journaling, like sometimes i just cant cry because ive bottled everything up for so long. So i very much urge ppl to cry when they can because its not a great feeling not being able to cry when you need to cry. Like even if its small, cry about it its fine. Its human to feel the full spectrum of emotion.

I forgot what voice i used for my character but i think it was some generic dude voice, i have been a little out of practice with my deeper voices though. But my voice is usually pretty deep anyway, i pitch my voice up a bit when im at work bc i dont want to scare the old timers too much. I hate to admit that my favorite voices to try to do are meatwad from aqua teen hunger force and stitch, theyre like the same voice to me 🤭 i do it for funsies, but in my teen years i did it a lot bc my friends gave me approval for it 🤭

Soo maybe i might budget to get my hands on those perfumes ☺️ i'd like to know what your favorite perfumes smelled like on first hand bases. This is a second best, best would be smelling it on your neck<3 theres a certain cologne i fell in love with years go that ive been trying to get my hands on, its polo red by ralph lauren it had smelled so wonderful to me.

Candles are a lot to take care of so i get it. I just have two main rules i follow for the life of my candle and the safety of my cats. Im the type of person where if i see soot in your candles i try to clean that out to lessen fire risk bc they can be dangerous, its something ppl never notice but thats ok i just want them to be safe. I used to play with the wax like that too!! It low key led to me trying to experiment a little with wax play which was interesting to say the least.

You really are an adorable little puppy<3 its nice to know i was right about thinking you were shorter than me<3 i like short girls, tall girls are nice but short girls are better<3 esp when theyre a little older than me🤭 also ironically i dont own anything royal purple but maybe one day!

oooh i love r&b!! one of my close friends loves it too and will always rec me songs!! and honestly thats sooo fair about waiting to listen to paramore i was the same way!

im always dd too!! just bc i wanna make sure my friends are safe!! bc we all live in the same apartment complex but i know what u mean! i also just like taking care of my friends as u know! im very much rather drink at home bc its my lil safe space! but if im with people i trust, then i like to let loose. plus i wanna lose my inhibitions with you! ill be such a cute lap pet while u and ur friends are drinking and having fun!!

omg i have trouble crying too!! i call it my emotional constipation so ill put on a sad movie to try and cry!! but yes, heres to us trying to me more in tune with our emotions!!

hehe cute cute cute i wanna hear now!! i think i also have a pretty deep voice so i bet we would sound amazing together!! also hehe stitch i love it!! i bet u sound sooo cute

oh trust me, i plan going to bbw soon and smelling you 🫣🥰 and omg i love polo red!! it smells sooo yummy

i started using a candle warmer rather than lighting my candles bc i got scared of the soot, and i know ur not suppose to keep candles lit for a long time but i love the smell so much!! and yes i love wax play. this is kinda embarrassing but i was doing wax play for someone and he had the audacity to get made at me bc i was moaning and enjoying it rather than in pain. smh just let me enjoy the warm feeling on my skin ya know?

i loveeeee being just a lil shorter, tall people kinda intimidate me at first but ur the perfect height!! hehe lets cuddle bc im sooo touch starved and lazy and in a cuddly mood rn. and omg how old are u??

[inke-ri]

Sat down to watch ep 2 of Percy Jackson and realized I never posted my thoughts on the first episode! Oops. I hadn't intended to basically liveblog it but alas. Oh well, figured I'd post it anyway!

---

- God hearing Percy's very baby voice reading the book's intro gave me chills. That was fantastic

- I love how they immediately set up the Mist

- Blackjack? :o

- Percy actually playing Mythomagic, that's cute. I think I like him not knowing about it all in TTC better (mostly cause he keeps getting annoyed at it) but this is neat. Maybe he's embarrassed by it like how people try to ignore their Hamilton phases lol

- Sequence between Sally and bby Percy was perfect btw, god

- Not feeling this mr Brunner yet, too dignifed for a guy who dresses up in armor and swings a sword around in class, but lets see what happens when the horse comes out

- Percy and Grover trading sandwiches, babies <3

- Did they not animate the water grabbing Nancy or was that just me

- Hang on, that was it? Ms Dodds looked so cool but there was no sense of urgency whatsoever with that fight? And Riptide just? Shook? Did it pop out on its own? Is the sword alive now? Dont Magnus Chase me btw OTL

- IDK it almost feels like it was an accident? I liked how in the books Percy messily but instinctively knew what to so. And that's not how the Mist works, people would definitely see SOMETHING jumping Percy

- I like that Percy's wearing a blue shirt tho

- ... also was that Rick Riordan

- That's some unnecessary drama between Percy and Grover :/

- Lowkey sad they cut everything about Percy genuinely trying his hardest to study for Brunner's class and failing. Chiron also didn't make that big of a blunder in the show either.

- That said I like Percy fidgeting with his hands in that scene

- I also wish he had failed school bc of his anxiety and dislexia frankly, as well as just showing more of how big of a troublemaker he was BEFORE the museum tour, not bc of the Nancy situation. Guess it was cut for time?

- Wait. we skipping the Fates? Seriously??

- Eddie! Kinda like what they did with him actually, before he kinda just let Gabe do whatever he wanted with Percy and only piped up when it started to get ugly.

- Okay so Gabe IS abusive - I like the line about picking up Sally's cellphone - but also kinda? Not as bad as he should be? I guess this is "aggressively mortal" and enough to mask Percy's scent? idk Gabe's behavior explained Percy's attitude so well but since he's been stripped of a lot of said attitude I guess this is consistent?

-  Sally hiding away and feeling the rain was nice. Feels like she's hiding away from all the mess that is her marriage. Also Poseidon maybe? They DO call him Stormbringer in the book - kinda ironic here tho since we know it's been raining a lot bc Zeus is mad lmao. I also love how young she looks since she was basically a teen mom

- That said I wish we'd seen how angry Gabe and the situation had made Percy instead of him just looking like a lost puppy. Just him angrily stomping to his room then immediately RELAXING when he saw his mom would have been perfect.

- ... do we really need another diAngelo reference. Again. I liked that Nico and Bianca were just random kids in the books at first y'know.

- No seriously between this, Mythomagic and a potential Blackjack... Dont Marvel this, show, PLEASE dont "I understood that reference" me 40 million times :/

- ... Sally is? Shutting Gabe up? Making him say please? Book Gabe would never ever let them go to Montauk after that, lmao. Is this really the kind of guy you're gonna MURDER at the end of the season?? Does it really warrant THAT? With this setup, it feels like it's leading up to ditching his crumpled backside with humiliation and hundreds of thousands of dollars in bills for all the appliances, not actual death. It just doesn't feel like either Percy or Sally are truly at the end of their rope with him.

- Idk I thought they were going to start with more subtle signs of abuse and then have that /moment/ when Percy realizes Gabe has been hitting Sally, and all the subtlety would fade away. Book Gabe is worse, but you get the feeling of Percy being used to it. It makes the moment he realizes it's much worse hit like a gut punch, which is what I expected them to emulate. Guess that's that then :/

-  Percy still looks like a confused puppy instead of being relaxed with Sally/angry at Gabe/happy about Montauk. Pls don't let this become a trend I know Percy being clueless and dumb all the time is a sin the later books did to him but,,, not here,,, not with this,,,

- it took me a moment to realize that was Kronos bc that did NOT sound like what a voice that seemed to come from the bowels of the earth should lol

- Ok, so I guess Sally crying while Percy's asleep is proof she's been holding back a lot. Maybe they had her stand up to Gabe as a hint that she's desperate and it's not something she usually does? That recontextualizes things, but, idk. Still think it would hit harder if they had made Gabe more menacing. You don't need to keep the physical abuse, but, idk, just shoot the same scene with Gabe's lines having more venom to them instead of that condescending vibe. Or at least not end it feeling like Sally "won" the argument, which is what it felt to me. Gabe at least coming out on "top" would tie it up more neatly imo. Maybe the line about not a scratch on the car or else?

- Unless she's crying cause she knows she's about to loose Percy. mmmmm.

- Interesting that they changed it from Percy always knowing Montauk was where Sally and his dad met.

- Btw Percy's actor is KILLING IT here

- Oh. Oh! So Sally's the one telling him? Oh, I'm gonna miss the mystery and terror of realizing a monster is after you, almost being FORCED to accept it. The absolute shock of seeing Grover with goat feet. The surrealness of being told the greek pantheon is real just after your mom dies, that distinct feeling of Percy barely believing it bc he feels like he's in a daze after he looses Sally.

- I do like the delivery of the scene tho, Sally is very awkward, it does feel like she rehearsed something akin to this and is so tense she cant get it out like she wanted. relatable lmao

- AGAIN SCOBELL IS KILLING IT GO BABY GO

- Loved the way Sally teared up too - really in line with the book - tho that would have stopped Percy dead on his tracks, he wouldn't push her like this, even if he was frustrated. It was another sign that Sally was at the end of her rope, how Percy refused to push her as most kids would bc he loved her so much and knew she was already so fragile thanks to Smelly Gabe

- I thought Grover felt a little too... Grown up I guess? But y'know what, I'm warming up to this cadence of his voice. Makes sense since he's like 28

- The "happy" music feels so offfffff,,, definitely missing the terror and urgency here. big sad

- Yea ok nvm Grover is wayyy too in control here. what did they do to my scaredy baby where is his anxious chewing and the bleating where IS IT GIVE IT TO ME

- Also he's 24? Huh, I guess I need to double check later

- ONCE AGAIN where is the sense of fear it's just Percy tilting his head and realizing its the Minotaur in one go like?? he's not even standing up??? /I/ barely noticed anything except for a vaguely bull shaped blob chasing after them

- No "shh!! names have power". I expected it since its a rule dropped after series 1 but I always liked it :(

- When is Grover gonna freak out or bonk his head and pass out pls he's too in control of the situation here ;-;

- Is it just a Giant Bull now? And did they decide to make Zeus 0.2% less of a jerk than he is and not have him crash the car?

- Oh! Grover is down at last! Okay, at least there's thaaaaaand he's up again. GREAT :/

- Sally's speech is great but once again ZERO sense of urgency. She can back and forth with Grover for minutes while a GIANT MONSTER is right after them. Also why is she making Grover promise to keep Percy safe? I thought it was at least leading up to a River Styx oath to set up the series but no??? This feels kinda ooc of her? Are they doing away with the Council of Cloven Elders and having THAT be the reason Grover goes with Percy bc. I would not like that.

- Okay, kinda warming up to the Minotaur design. Wish they kept the half-human bit of it but anthro cow works too. Fun fact I occasionally imagined Bessie being the one with long ears so this threw me off for a bit lol

- Not sure about how to feel about Sally being the one to tease the Minotaur with the coat. I GUESS its not too different from Sally being the one to tell Percy to jump sideways, but the thing is I don't like how giving that to her left Percy's own confrontation with it

- Like he just CHARGES IT, that's supremely stupid :/ Percy actually thought strategically about it even if he was terrified and angry, he was able to control himself enough to be smart about it!

- We also miss out on him doing it bc he already lost his mom and couldn't loose Grover

- Also did he hit it with Riptide in that lateral move he does in the book? Isnt that THE move that kills it?

- Riptide is being your resident Spidey-Sense again BUT AT LEAST THE SWORD GLOWS ITS BEAUTIFUL I'M SO HAPPY.

- I actually had a moment of "oh, they made it sparkle?" and then it hit me that its the celestial bronze glow and I cheered lmao. I expected it to be a little more subtle so it took me a second but this is SO COOL.

- I like that they still have Percy climb on its back but it feels too sanitized: grabbing the horn, being able to hold on with just your knees on to a slippery animal IN THE RAIN in order to have a cool stab-in-the-head shot.

- Like the sequence isn't BAD, per se, it just lacks that frenzied, barely thinking, just surving, angry and hurting vibe of the book. It's like they sucked all of the emotion out of it even tho its more or less accurate.

- No Percy dragging Grover down to camp, crying, calling for his mom? CRIMINAL. You cast a little kid! Let him be a little kid!!

- At least the credits are pretty

---

Final thoughts: I guess I shouldn't have been surprised, but I sort of expected that, given how much Riordan shows up in the credits, this would have been more book-accurate. And even if it wasn't, he went off about how the actors may not look like the characters, but they embody the "feel" of them, and that's enough, which so far holds up - Walker Scobell being the absolute winner so far, kid can ACT - with the notable of exceptions of Grover (too in control, too serious, not really the scaredy but brave satyr he is), Chiron (yea, he definitely feels too old and dignified for my tastes. He feels like someone who teaches theory, not practice.) and Smelly Gabe.

So I think I expected the same out of the show. But I actually think it's more akin to the Hunger Games: pretty accurate if you go through it scene by scene, but with so much nuance, emotion and context missing.

Regardless of how negative this sounds, I actually enjoyed the episode! It just caught me off guard, how... lifeless is a bit harsh, it's more like a lot of the emotion was sucked out of quite a few scenes, it felt like they were just hitting plot points I guess? Regardless, I'll adjust my expectations accordingly. I DO genuinely like the THG movies, and I assume if I apply the same separation between adaptation and book to this show it'll be a lot more fun.

(The one thing I wont forgive is the score tho. It's SO generic. Almost like a discount superhero theme at times. Sad.)

[justagrin]

smth i shoved into a discord group specifically for people to talk about SA (tw for implied csa/rape/incest)

oooof one of my friends disclosed to me that (tw sa & incest) their dad SA'd them (at least once? idk if its a reoccuring thing i didnt ask any questions n they understandably clammed up n changed the subject n i said "hey if you ever need to talk about anything i have similar experiences" but oh boy is it lowkey triggering that stuff for me rn. idefk if my stuff counts as sa tho. like i know my dad sexualised me a lot like verbally as a kid and i remember being disgusted all the time and i remember being fucking terrified of him all the time even when he didn't seem to be doing anything. and i remember him often saying or doing stuff and i'd just think to meself "ok we're repressing that!" (unsurprisingly i don't remember what actually prompted that). i dont have any memories of him touching me but i have some of someone touching me and the way i react to certain sexual situations is sus as fuck, but honestly those could be two entirely different things but idk! idk. i just remember telling my mum that all the stuff he said made me uncomfy and predictably got told i was "overreacting" and that it was "normal" which turned into "he just doesn't know when something's inappropriate" and honestly thats the closest to closure i'm ever gonna get but whatever. anyway the dots aren't connected enough to me to outright say i relate and im sure as fuck not ready to actually talk about it to anyone irl but yeah. idk where i was going with this tbh. i have a notebook of stuff from my childhood related to that^ (from when i've remembered them, but most of the stuff in the book i can't remember unless i read it over again) and my friends who've seen it have reacted with pretty strong disgust but idk. my entire childhood was that & gaslighting myself into thinking i was overreacting (which btw!! lead to me getting SA'd and harassed so many fucking times as an adult!!!) so it was normal to me pfft and counsellors i've shown it to all refuse to give me a solid answer bc they don't wanna "risk giving me false memories") but agghhh. one thing i definitely remember is whenever i had discharge or my period in my teens i'd just. want to cry and shake and curl up and errrrrrrmmmmmmm thats not normal lol. something was definitely wrong there but idk if i'll ever fucking be able to figure out what that is.

ok yeah i dug the notebook out again and (same tw's as above, just kind of graphic and intense) yeah theres a bit in there about him crawling into my bes and i was freaked the fuck out so i just ran out of the room and when i told my mum i was told it was "normal". and theres a bit where i was 14 and drew art based on the song pantsu nugeru mon (lit: i can take off my panties) bc i was 14!! i wasn't THINKING anything secxual!! it was a song about growing up to me! so my dumb ass showed my dad bc i was proud of the art itself and he got really weird and intense and close and was like "what are you going to do when you take off your panties?" which. ew. gross. fuck off. oh and that one time i fell asleep on the sofa and i guess i had a sex dream or smth which i didnt think anything of until my dad randomly got intense and weird again and asked if i "had any interesting dreams" that night (which he never usually does ffs). oh and he fully called ma tease relatively recently actually, and said i should call my (now ex) boyfriend "daddy", has referred to himself as my "daddy" in THAT godawful tone and makes frequent BDSM jokes towards his sister which is just an example of the verbal shit i had to put up with and idk how anyone in the room when it happens can excuse it but to them i guess its one weird thing he said they can brush off bc they don't realise i had to hear it CONSTANTLY and deal with what he DID to and they didn't see the scary moments. i also remember reading a magazine article about incest/csa when i was like 11ish?? and idk WHAT it triggered but my absolute fear of my dad/older men in general kind of started after that and my mum always said it was reading the magazine that did it but bro i dont think one thing like that can elicit a decade or so of consistent fight or flight mode I think my body remembered stuff that I can't.

Jesus fucking christ thats the most concise way i've ever actually described that. idk if anyone can relate or anything. also honestly now that he's been relatively "good" for a few years now in terms of how he speaks to me i don't really get the fear response anymore. and i'm dependent on him for finances and medical stuff so its. whatever. i guess. i'm fucking terrified that if i ever have a daughter he'll pull the same shit (hence basically nuking my body with birth control lmao) and luckily my brother's kids are both boys so i don't believe he's a threat to them if he didnt treat my brothers the same way he did me ygm? but idk what i can actually do about it

[24hlevi]

Nam Onjo As Your Girlfriend

Nam Onjo (All Of Us Are Dead) X Gn!Reader

Summary: How Onjo would be as your girlfriend

Warnings: Language

- let's start with you guys are DEFINITELY friends to lovers, even better, childhood best friends to lovers (cheongsan is crying in the corner bc of this btw)

- no but fr she knew about her feelings for you after like three months of knowing you

- one day, when you two were eating lunch together with isak, she said that she needed to talk to you right at that moment and was clearly nervous, making you confused while isak was grinning behind you and was giving onjo a thumbs up

- you obviously said okay, and when you two were back inside the school and onjo made sure there was no one else there, she held her hand out in a fist before giving you what was in it

- her name tag

- "you...want to go out with me?" you asked her

- all onjo did in response was nod, too afraid of whatever she would say that could fuck it up

- let's just say she was extremely shocked when you suddenly hugged her and confessed to her you had the same feelings

- now onto general hcs

- onjo is always holding onto your hand, no matter where you two might be, she says its a comfort thing which makes you so happy that you're the one comforting her

- she gets shy sometimes when she's saying something that makes her sound like an idiot in love (she is) and her voice usually gets quieter when she does say those things

- she said "i love you" first but it wasn't that much of a big deal as you two had been saying it to one another as friends for a long time

- onjo likes study dates, because she truly needs the help, but most of the time it just ends with you two cuddling and doing everything except studying

- speaking of cuddling, this girl is in a constant need for them, like she'll go up to you and just hug you for a long ass time and you know what she wants

- plus the way she cuddles is just adorable, she's like a koala with her arms and legs around you and her head on your chest or her face is in the crook of your neck

- if you ever want to purposely get her flustered, kiss her cheek! she turns bright red and probably runs off 9/10 times

- if you ever tease her in any way expect to be hit by a notebook if in class, or kicked in the back of the knee outside of school, and it hurts a lot surprisingly

- arguments are extremely rare, and since you guys are teens it's hard to work it out the "right" way, so it usually ends after being mad at each other for half an hour

- she loves going out at night with you to the city and eat street food while shopping, it's her favorite thing to do with you

- onjo is pretty shy on pda other than holding hands and a hug here and there, do anything more than that and her whole face is red

- her father loves you and you three often eat dinner or breakfast together before school, he also says that you can help her get better grades but usually he's joking to make onjo irritated

- for any birthday, holiday, anniversary, etc. onjo tends to get smaller things that have a lot more meaning to them, like a custom picture that she paid someone to draw of the two of you on your first date

- she also prefers smaller gifts than big ones that are on the expensive side, mostly because she's worried that you're wasting your money on her so even if you get her a promise ring she will wear it everyday and never take it off

- in the beginning of your guys relationship, onjo would get so embarrassed over pet names that anytime you called her one she would probably end up hitting you in some form but after time she grew used to it and now just blushes at hearing one

- onjo's kisses are so sweet and a little hesitant at both of you not really knowing what to do so she usually sticks to short pecks

- buy her any type of food and she'll love you forever like it doesn't even matter what it is, she just loves food and having you buy it for her makes her feel all warm and giddy inside

- on dates she will always try to pay no matter how much the cost in total is, so you two came to an agreement to switch on and off for each date

- onjo loves wearing your clothes, more specifically, hoodies and jackets, especially when going to school because she can smell you on the clothes and it gives her comfort when you two have different classes (tho every time it happens isak teases the hell out of her)

- she isn't too big on matching couple items, but she does love matching phone cases, and probably has like 3 sets

- onjo's love languages are: words of affirmation + receiving/giving gifts + physical touch

[kunikame]

a short fic about blasting songs in miyukis room (which later becomes the cafeteria) with the seidou boys written for my linked playlist bc i felt i needed to write this. hope you enjoy <3

i only wrote the things i imagined! feel free to imagine any other scenarios for other characters with the songs! if you do, let me know in the comments! id be happy to read them <3

warnings: i betaread this while listening to enstars songs. fem pronouns. lowercase. probably nothing more but lmk :)

ㅡ！tags: @toges-wife / fill form/pm/ask/comment to be added! (if you’re in bold i can’t tag you)

after the boys secured a spot at nationals you figured it called for a celebration or something, so you grabbed kuramochi and eijun - who in turn grabbed furuya and haruichi - and raided miyukis room. he really didn't want to let you guys in, koushuu disagreed aswell, but too bad because majority wins. kuramochi set up the speaker and the playlist you now and the previous 3rd years threw together started playing.

the others were of course alarmed by this because, loud upbeat music? from miyuki and koushuus' room? seto takuma has never run so fast in his life. everyone sprinted over in worry, only to see the blame lay on you - which made way more sense.

they also wanted to join the celebration but the room was too small to hold all of you, so eijun proposed the - for once - brilliant idea to move to the cafeteria, which you did, after a moment of stunned silence. the previous 3rd years who were still hanging out there with some of the 2nd and 1st years also joined the party, as they should.

the song that started through shuffle was where them girls at. thanks to it you found out the kominato twins listen to nicki minaj - as they should. you and the pink haired twins along with seto, kawakami and yui were screaming the nicki songs at the top of your lungs.

the guys really got into cruisin for a bruisin, it was their favorite song from when you all watched teen beach movie together! the whole reason you added it to the playlist. surprisingly, shirasu and aso took the spotlight for this one!

jalebi baby and shut up and dance were entirely yours and kuramochis songs. he asked you to dance with him for both, how could you refuse? neither of you would be caught alive admitting to be flustered with the other so close to you, though. You could swear you saw ryousuke recording and snickering, but it might've just been your imagination.

big time rush didn't even a need a voting, everyone knew who the big 4 were for that one. koushuu (unwillingly), miyuki (unwillingly but he got really into it), eijun (willingly, got too into it) and furuya (he had fun?). it was a precious sight. you all had a great laugh over their perfomance, but it was great. their voices meshed together unexpectedly well.

the greatest show started playing exactly when coach kataoka came to check what the commotion was. miyuki and yuuki, as the captains, took the lyrics for this one. they switched each line, and it worked really well. all the background vocals were done by the rest of you. it was a sight to see. you all working together. almost like during matches. rei placed a camera in the cafeteria to record and commemorate the whole thing. her and kataoka chose to stay with you, while ochiai decided he'd rather not. thank heavens.

after the boys had their moments, you figured it was the girls time to shine, and the playlist seemed to agree with you. the moment you heard the intro to girlfriend you ran to get whatever you could use as a microphone and got ready to sing your heart out, fellow manager and close friend takako joined you soon after. the guys clapped after your perfomance, enjoying it to the fullest just as you enjoyed theirs.

this is what you adored about the seido baseball club. you were like family. a huge family with its ups and downs that always came back together. everyone supported everyone, but there was still friendly competition.

die young. "i hear you heart beat to the beat of the drums" *everyone bangs a fist on the nearest surface* "oh what a shame that you came here with someone-"

dj got us fallin' in love. jun shone with this one. his voice cracked while screaming "CAUSE BABY TONIIIIiiiiGHT". continued like nothing happened. professional

of course, some songs passed without any screaming as you get tired and so do your vocal cords, but the music never stopped. volume lowers and people sit down to drink and talk a bit, then when another screamable song comes up the volume goes back to max and it's like you never stopped. you were peacefully laughing with seto when kuramochi called out to you, pushing the volume higher on the speaker. immediately recognizing the intro you grabbed your bottle and it's like you were waiting for this moment your entire life, except everyone else was confused. ryousuke didn't remember this song being in the playlist.

"once upon a time, a few mistakes ago-"

ryousuke walked up to kuramochi after you got into your singing. "dude, what's this about?" kuramochi while never once breaking his fond gaze off you simply shrugged, "reminds her of her past crush on narumiya- or was it sanada? i dunno, some guy she met through us.. always played this song when she realized who the guy was, so she added it here i guess." ryousuke just hummed in understanding then moved his gaze over to you, surprised to see you now standing on a table with the guys around you sweatdropping but cheering you on nonetheless.

when memories by conan gray came on, someone moved to lower the volume only to stop at the death glare they received from you and miyuki kazuya himself. For someone who was so against this, he sure got mad over that song, huh. It became a heartfelt duet, but noone understood why a duet with you 2. It was a secret.

"so there's no good reason in make-believing that we could ever exist again. I can't be your friend, can't be your lover, can't be reason we hold back eachother from falling in love, with somebody other than me."

after that, the night continued in this spirit. everyone was enjoying themselves, everyone got a chance to sing their song be it alone or with someone, even coach and rei! as the playlist was slowly running out of songs to play, the one song you put on 'hide in playlist' begged to be played. you, of course, granted it's wish, as it was a song you left for last on purpose. you called out to your co-organizer, kuramochi, who looked at you and based off your sparkling eyes instantly knew. a loud "hey!" came out of his throat, and the idle chatters volume slowly went down.

"everyone, if you would please look over here," you said waiting for them to switch their gazes over to you, "yeah, thank you. so, uh, first of all congratulations on todays win! i never for a second thought we wouldn't make nationals. i knew if anyone, you guys would do it. with the 3rd years there to support you, with the field players and us in the dugout, with coach kataoka, the pitchers, all of you. i knew you'd make it, and i'm so endlessly proud of you! of your hard work, will to fight, endurance.. i can't wait to see how far you - we - can go. let's aim for the top. now, if you would all please rise for the 2010-2014 seido baseball club anthem!"

coach kataoka and rei nodded along with your speech, as they felt the same way - proud of how far the boys have come - and though confused, stood up along with everyone else. most people stood in silence and slight confusion, looking toward kuramochi for answers, only to be left disappointed when the man wouldn't give any. he simply continued staring at you with a very warm and fond look in his eye.

the nights - avicii

Once upon a younger year

When all our shadows disappeared

The animals inside came out to play

Went face to face with all our fears

Learned our lessons through the tears

Made memories we knew would never fade

everyone instantly recognized the intro, smiles and grins lighting up their faces. the joyous screaming resumed, only this time it was everyone, not just a couple people. You ran over to kuramochi and miyuki, grabbing each hand, motioning to them to keep the chain going. soon, everyone was holding hands and jumping around together, screaming at the top of their lungs.

One day, my father, he told me

"Son, don't let it slip away"

He took me in his arms, I heard him say

"When you get older

Your wild heart will live for younger days

Think of me if ever you're afraid"

He said, "One day, you'll leave this world behind

So live a life you will remember"

My father told me when I was just a child

"These are the nights that never die"

My father told me

each time a "Hey" was yelled in the song, it was also yelled by the group (jun was having the time of his life). eijun encouraged everyone to jump along for emphasis, an idea many supported.

though miyuki and koushuu were originally against this, you think this might be the first time you've seen kazuya genuinely happy, and koushuu coming out of his shell. your party was probably heard all the way to the other dorm buildings but you didn't care. that was a problem for tomorrow, for now you decided you'll just live in the moment.

[scott-mccall-the-hot-girl]

my ultimate guide to thiam fic !!

( as a new teen wolf stan )

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the classic post war, long ass (multi chapter) fic !!with great development that genuinely made me laugh out loud, they have the best friendship in this & i love it very much. ( like theo teaches liam to drive and i just *happy sobs* ) a fundamental in thiam fanfiction !! all stans have probably already read it but if you haven’t this is in fact a threat ,, go show this vv iconic story some love !!

Airplanes - Captainmintyfresh

Summary: After the Anuk-ite and the hunters are dealt with Liam needs a break. Cue Theo and a road trip that Liam should know better than to think will be peaceful.

Not Rated, No Archive Warnings Apply, Completed, 43/43 Chapters, Words: 236,875 (236k)

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okay okay so this one is also post 6B !! but ,, now we introduce fighting monroe & the hunters again ,, so we get the boys & a new mission !! so if you like an intresting plot 11/10 would recommend !! just to be clear this ISN’T complete ,, if that turns you off i understand but definitely give this one a read !! it litterally have theo doing crossword puzzles & fighting zombies

Vacancy Signs - LovelyLittleGrim

Summary: Theo and Liam are in Manhattan negotiating a pack allyship when the zombie apocalypse breaks out. Now, the two of them have to find their way back to Beacon Hills without getting eaten by zombies or killing one another.

Rated: Explicit, Graphic Description of Violence, Not Completed, 15/17 Chapters, Words: 89,605 (89k)

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Royalty AU !! I REPEAT ROYALTY AU !! a fantastic au where i stan their moms more than i stan them !! genuinely so good at the childhood rivals to lovers trope !! i’m genuinely obsessed with this one. has made me cry more than once ,, hurts in a good way <3 the ending is just *chefs kiss* also one of the tags is genuinely: # theo and liam make bad choices for over 130k straight !! if that doesn’t sound appealing i don’t know what does !!

Artificial Love - songbvrd

Summary: Prince Theo and Prince Liam are forced to spend every Summer together from age five onwards. They hate each other, and usually find ways to make each other miserable as much as possible in their six weeks together. But when they're reunited because of intended unions as adults, things change. They're both supposed to be married to noble women, but neither of them is as interested in anyone else as they are with their childhood rival.

Rated: Mature, No Archive Warnings Apply, Completed, Chapters: 32/32, Words: 172,935 (172k)

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so if you are in the mood for a crack fic that’s not explicitally a crack fic this is for you !! okay so i’m really hit or miss with AU’s ,, sometimes i feel like they don’t quite capture the characters right but this story have the BEST dramatic liam i have ever seen in my life !! basically they all live in the same apartment building & it’s fantastic !! i saw this one floating around a lot but the summary didn’t really unrest me until i have it a shot !! so go read it rn !! also nolan & brett are genuinely fantastic and make me wheeze ,, LIKE ACTUALLY VERBALLY LAUGHING !! all i’m gonna say is that my fav characters are scott & the beetles but that won’t make actual sense until you read it !!

The Neighbors Song - TheodoreR

Summary: “I always hear you singing on your balcony every morning, but suddenly you’ve stopped?”

Or the one where Theo annoys Liam every morning with his awful singing until he doesn’t anymore and Liam is even more annoyed. Liam hates every single thing about his mornings -the fact that they happen in the morning alone is enough. The thing Liam hates the most about his mornings though is the terrible voice of the guy who lives below him. He can’t sing for shit and Liam tried to politely let him understand that by throwing flour and water on his balcony, and also by shouting it to him, you can’t sing for shit!, and then by writing it into a note he proceeded to attach to his door, but this Raeken guy just keeps doing it, every single morning, like a fucking rooster. Liam did nothing to deserve this. He probably didn’t do anything to deserve better either to be fair, he doesn’t expect to open his window and be welcomed by some angelic voice singing him good morning, he’d just be happy with nothing. Silence. That’s something Liam can appreciate in mornings. Just some bark from his dog and the sound of his misery and that’s it. But no, god forbid the new guy lets him have that.

Rated: Explicit, Creator Chose Not to Use Archive Wanrings, Completed, 8/8 Chapters, Words: 42,814 (42k)

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me: i’m not a big fan of AU’s ,, proceeds to talk about ANOTHER au… OKAY BUT THIS ONE !! it’s not complete but the author has been updating regularly ,, vv slow burn !! but in a REALLY intresting way !! i lOVE LIAM IN THIS SO MUCH ,, he is such a diaster of a person and it’s wonderful !! they have a great dynamic & i’m sucker for general puppy pack content ( and erica reyes being a badass ) !! also theo plays lacrosse in this & i really like it ahhhhh ,, also liam is just being an artic monkeys stan the whole time & theo is like *que confused repressed gay noises*

Inglorious Roommates - honeyscape

Summary: A roommate is defined as “a person with whom one shares a room.”

Theo would say a roommate was more along the lines of, “The person who's the bane of his existence. The weirdo that sleeps for days. The spaz that exercises at 3am. The guy with a revolving door of annoying friends. An insufferable human being that Theo has no control over living in his room.”

Example: Theo hates his roommate Liam.

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okay okay i hate myself but i have another WIP for y’all !! this one is jUST FANTASTIC. i’m genuinely so upset it’s most likely not going to updated again *incoherent screaming ensues*. for this story ,, it’s very theo-centric bUT thats bc it ends right before liam becomes a concrete member of the story !! ANYWAY: basic plot = theo & acquiring not one but two children ,, so #dad theo but he is still crusty & homeless and i love him very much. it’s just so GOOD !! just read if you want to experience my fav theo coming out story & him etching high school musical

Look who's talking - Captainmintyfresh

Summary: Theo had been labeled many things in his life. Evil, failure, monster. He'd never thought Father would be one of those things but as he looked across the table to a six year old with blue smears of bubble gum icecream across her face trying to coax the first words out of her sister. Finger jabbing towards Theo's face as she repeated 'Daddy' again and again he couldn't bring himself to dispute the label.

(Theo accidentally adopts two young werewolves)

Not Rated, Creator Chose Not to Use Archive Warnings, Not Completed, Chapters: 16/?, Words: 48740 ( 48k )

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so here me out: post-canon ( poetry like angst ) summer get away !! just the boys doing cute little domestic things together whilst pining !! theo’s guilt in this is just so powerful & aGjffkgkkfkvkdlv !! i think it’s so interesting to see how they interact in this one, it’s just very heart warming !! and it features one of my favorite niche teen wolf tropes of theo being great with like seven year old girls- it’s just so good ,, very much a wonderful little one shot that just makes your heart happy.

(next time i see you you'll show me) a hundred different ways to say the same things - cherrysprite

Summary: “...You deserve good things,” Liam says eventually. He makes sure not to look at Theo even though he can feel his eyes turn on him. Somehow he can already tell that Theo doesn’t believe him.

Liam instantly makes that the goal of this summer - making Theo believe him.

Rating: Teen and Up, No Archive Warnings Apply, Chapters: 1/1, Words: 28875 ( 28k )

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okay so this next section of fic recs is a bit different !!

two of my favorite authors !! and a compilation of fics i’ve read by them both !!

for context: these two have written some genuinely gorgeous fics, like pure poetry, they explore the real gritty & scary side of our boys relationship in such a wonderful way. they’ve both used some of my favorite tropes & i love them very much !!

whenever i need something soothing but so genuinely intresting & enticing these are my go to !! ( also they both write a lot of good nolan angst & some vv good fics with hayden )

go check out:

eneiryu

as well as fallingforboys

here are some of my favorite fics by them ~

darling i want you here in my arms (kiss the pain away, i know you can) - fallingforboys

even before you touched me, i belonged to you (all you had to do was look at me) - fallingforboys

memories linger like tattoo scars (but your touch on my skin is just as permanent) - fallingforboys

skin, bones, a stolen heart, and an ugly creature lurking underneath -fallingforboys

i don't know how to breathe in the place i called home - fallingforboys

whisper your gossamer truths into the shadow, maybe you'll find the answers you're searching for - fallingforboys

between the mountains and the valley we built a monument to our regret - eneiryu

cracked the hinges of the cage and waited for you - eneiryu

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okay and finally: since i am a self centered whore

my own fic: an rendition of the # elevator scene

it’s basically my version of post canon if we did get the kiss in the elevator. we got a classic liam pov in which he is has 12/10 for extreme bi diaster energy even whilst being shot at !! so go him ig…

Fuck Off, Fuck This & Fuck It! - nefelibata_peach

Summary: Liam thought to himself heart rate climbing, they were bound to be dead by morning. So he thought with everything but his brain and he kissed him.

Where Liam Dunbar is very confused, slightly traumatized, and just a bit scared but hey, aren't they all! Bad decisions ensue as two boys fight in a war they never did sign up for.

Rating: Teen and Up, Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Chapters: 1/1, Words: 3558 ( 3k )

[mandareeboo]

SU Music Rankings

Bc I can and I wanna start some Disk Horse rip. These are all in order of preference, with explanations, etc. It’s a long bitch. That said, I’m not counting little short jingles or small joke songs like Little Butler. This is the meat and potatoes of SU music- just under 30 songs. I might do the rest if people like my takes lol.

I scored it mostly on three bases- how dear it was to my heart, how much/often I relisten to it, and also what it means to the plot. That said, little fun songs don’t automatically go farther down than big, plot-heavy songs either! It’s a strange little balance.

Special Note: I don’t dislike any of this music! I love SU and that includes its bumps and glitches. I just pick favorite children lol.

1.) Change

Was there ever a more Steven moment than when he wiped the blood off his face and kissed it into sparkles? I think not. 

If “Be Wherever You Are” is an ode to young Steven, then this is teen Steven’s. Talking about change, and how much and how little it can do. How he holds his arms up for Spinel to hug him, so trusting. How he seems able to just. Break into soft tears at will, and not to be manipulative- it’s just his kind nature. The warmth in his voice. Fuck yesssss.

2.) Change Your Mind

This song is only fifty five seconds and it’s EVERYTHING to me. It really felt like someone was speaking the words I’d always held deep inside of me, unsure of how to say. It feels like a goodbye to someone who never really loved me. 

As much as I enjoyed Future, if this was the finale of SU, I would’ve been perfectly okay with that.

3.) Drift Away

This song gave me legitimate shivers the first time I heard it, and it still haunts me to this day. Spinel stayed, and waited, and all she got was a transmission thousands of years later. Fuck.

4.) Here We Are In The Future

THE MOVIE IS SU AS ITS BEST AND I WON’T BE SWAYED ON IT. Steven being a teen who loves his weird family but is growing just a bit sarcastic to their drama. The adorable love he and Connie share. His slow realization that he will always be working, always have things to do, is both somber and real. The Crystal Gems won’t be safe with one epic battle. They’ll be safe with years of hard work and love. HIS LITTLE HANDSHAKE WITH AMETHYST.

This is a helluva bop and a great way to summarize the main character’s backstories.

5.) Let’s Only Think About Love

Did ya’ll know that Zach Callison killed his throat with that last note? He gave his all for this performance in a vocal range he no longer comfortably do and by god did it SHINE. The FLAIR. The FORESHADOWING. All of the Gems all being awkward about Rose and Steven trying to bring them to the present. Peridot having a mini-existential crisis in a cute yellow dress. I love Zach Callison’s normal singing voice but man is that a fucking bop. Nothing will ever beat it.

6.) Here Comes A Thought

This bad boy helped me out a LOT with some mental issues I was dealing with in high school. I was unmedicated, unsupervised, and full of anxiety. I’d have break downs when I tried to speak about certain things. I couldn’t function. This song inspired me. It helped me feel okay with my intrusive thoughts.

And the episode! -chef’s kiss-. Once again bringing up the morally gray area of training child soldiers. Connie expanding her social group. Steven’s trauma hauling ass in that second half. The ANIMATION. Stevonnie’s gorgeous singing voice. GOD yes.

7.) It’s Over Isn’t It?

Just barely squeaking above Stronger Than You, this ballad is everything gorgeous. The whole episode is. I think Mr. Greg stands in the top five of my episodes for the entire show. It even got nominated!

There’s just so much about this song that I love. The gentle melancholy of Pearl’s voice. How the crew had to redo the shots for this bit bc Deedee went so fucking hard. The hard cuts between Pearl, remembering the love of her life, and Steven, who has begun to feel like he took her away. I’d recommend this song to anyone, regardless of what they do or don’t know about SU, simply bc it tugs so many heartstrings of love, loss, and responsibility.

8.) Stronger Than You

Did you realize this episode aired SEVEN years ago? This bitch was what got me into SU! Hearing about Ruby and Sapphire made my little gay heart so happy inside, and then getting a whole song confirming that they were a couple, that their love powered the strongest Gem on the team? Aaaaaaaaa

To this DAY I get excited when I hear Estelle start singing. This song is timeless. This song will live in media history. God I fucking love this song.

9.) Other Friends

I’m not the biggest musical person, so I hadn’t heard of Sarah Stiles before her casting as Spinel, but JESUS CHRIST the lady went hard. She went SO fucking hard. Sarah Stiles started on 100 and somehow just kept CLIMBING. You can just hear the sheer manic energy building in her voice, the anger and resentment. 10/10 Sarah Stiles is a queen.

10.) Independent Together

This made the list entirely bc the crew was like “you’re gonna get a himbo ass Steven-Greg fusion singing with Opal while Garnet flies across the moon on Lion while floating” and I am forever thankful to them for it

11.) Who We Are

Bismuth deserved more songs. ‘Nuff said.

12.) Peace and Love (On the Planet Earth)

It Could’ve been Great is EASILY one of my favorite s2 episodes. I love the entire concept of this song. Of Steven making music to reflect how much Earth means to him and his family. Of him teaching Peridot some self-care. Also Peridot’s singing voice is really cute and squeaky. 

I know it’s silly, but I would’ve really enjoyed a flip around of this in Future! Like Peridot reminding Steven how much he loves music, that he needs to take time to relax for himself, maybe with a new verse or just a remix of the original song!

13.) Something Entirely New

I watched this episode as it aired, and I legitimately almost cried. I love Charlyne Yi’s voice so much ya’ll- her raspy, not perfect singing voice against Sapphire’s deep soothing lull is great.

And to have Ruby and Sapphire’s meeting be the way it was- for Ruby to bemoan Sapphire losing Homeworld, to being stuck with a single Ruby, while Sapphire is a noble who has always been taught everyone in her “caste” is vitally important (and has, in her own mind, taken that to mean every Gem, as she should) and how they come together and make each other happy. Good shit good shit.

14.) I’m Just a Comet

The fact that Greg’s music career never really blasted off pisses me off to this day bc Tom Scharpling’s voice is fucking BUTTER. Also the song really feels like a jab at his parents now that we know the kind of dynamic he had growing up. “This life in the stars if all I’ve ever known” is definitely him wiping away their existence after reminding them (and himself) the things they used to say about him.

15.) Do It For Her

This episode. This fucking episode. This episode got me permanently hooked on SU. I’d just binged season 1 and was kinda meh about it overall after the bop of Stronger Than You. “Oh,” I thought to myself, foolishly, “I’ll probably just casually watch this from time to time.”

Like three days later Sworn to the Sword aired and that was it. I was hooked! Pearl’s gentle training song turning darker and darker, Connie’s accompaniment from nervous to determined to fully into such a toxic mindset. The fact that SU had the BALLS to discuss the repercussions of training child soldiers, now and later. This episode was everything to me, STILL is everything to me.

Six years and well over 100 fanfics written later, I think it’s safe to say this show swallowed me whole and never let go.

16.) System/Boot.pearl_final(3)

I debated putting this on the list because it’s not anything crazy important, just a way to show things are Wrong, but I had to do it entirely bc Pearl is so damn SALTY.

Like telling us about the Gems makes sense, she felt like she was given a duty, but she went so damn petty. WHY is that Ruby alone. Gross. This Amethyst is a trash dump. Wtf are you people.

17.) Full Disclosure

This episode really feels like a turning point for SU. Before, the show had its dark moments- but now we’re in the thick of it, and it’s not going away. Full Disclosure felt like an rebuff to the idea of returning to any normal we’d established in season 1. Gems are actually a giant species now. Gems tried to kill us now. There’s this Yellow Diamond bitch who got namedropped. Something about a Cluster. 

The song itself is BALLER, with its ingenious use of Steven’s ringtone and photos as he tries to decide whether to clue in Connie on all this nonsense. Meanwhile we, the audience, already know damn well Connie about to yeet some common sense into him.

18.) What’s the Use of Feeling Blue?

I’mma admit it- I’m a Yellow Diamond stan. I’ve always loved her- her anger, her poise, her hardworking nature. I actively argued against the “Yellow Shattered Pink” theories back in the day. But, man, when this arc leaked? I got so overexcited I was too jittery to watch it for like two days. It’s easily my favorite arc of the series. The sheer alien nature of the zoo, the Famethyst, and absolutely Patti Lupone’s beautiful ballad. Goddamn. Yellow singing to Blue to try and help her regain her old status, the warble in her voice as she reminds Blue she misses Pink too, the movement of the bubbles as she talks about attack. It gives me shivers to this day. FUCK.

19.) Tower of Mistakes

This is, fun fact, that only SU song I have completely memorized. The story itself is kinda funny! See, we lost internet at my house for a solid 5 to 6 months when these episodes aired, so I only got a very brief window to view them all. But this was the first Amethyst song in a long while, and I didn’t want to forget it! So I keep replaying it in my head for ages. And that’s still definitely a thing.

Anyway will never not be sad that this entire song was about making it up to Garnet for Amethyst’s perceived slights with Sugilite (which was a two-way road), only for Garnet to pressure her into fusion later when pissed and never discuss it again bc Garnet probably never thought twice about it and Amethyst has the emotional openness of a clam that’s just been told its ugly. Helluva way to make someone feel like shit, G. Helluva way to bottle that shit, Ames.

20.) On the Run

I’ve said it once, I’ve said it a million times: Amethyst! Needed! More! Songs! 

The dichotomy between Steven’s play and Amethyst’s honest desire to run away from home is so well-done, especially when you consider a lot of Steven and Amethyst’s actions are playing together. The song is also near and dear to me simply bc it’s my favorite Amethyst episode to exist (well, maybe second to What’s Your Problem, but not by much). Moments like these are all the proof I need that they were right to fuse first.

21.) Be Wherever You Are

This tune really just feels like an ode to who Steven was as a kid. Trapped on an island with no way home, and he’s just happy to be with his friends. The stars are beautiful and not oppressive. Also that one animatic with Lars and the Off Colors playing in the Homeworld Kindergarten to this music was iconic and made this song get stuck in my head for a solid month.

22.) Familiar

I ADORE how the crew use bright neon colors to show how alien Homeworld can be. And Steven recognizing that the Diamonds treat him how the CGs used to, and how prepared he is to “fix” a broken family. It’s a soft, gentle tune about melancholy. Also the Pebbles are beautiful.

23.) Let Me Drive My Van Into Your Heart

Such a cute little love ballad, but every time I listen to it now I just imagine the heart attack Rose must’ve had at the line “And if we look out of place/Well, baby, that's okay/I'll drive us into outer space.” like there’s a Vietnam war flashback if I ever heard one

24.) What Can I Do?

I’m kind of neutral on this one? Rose and Greg both have great voices, but the song itself lacks many lyrics. I think it was definitely a good way to show Rose’s flaws in thinking.

Also, I’m shocked they managed cram that much vaguely sexual innuendo into two minutes, followed by how Not Hetereo that dance between Rose and Pearl was, and not get their asses chewed by it. You go guys.

25.) Cookie Cat

I love a lot of the vibes this song has. The lyrics are so damn prophetic, but they also sound like the kind of weird 90s commercials I grew up on. It’s been like two decades since I saw the Shirley Temple commercial but I’ll be damned if I don’t remember “Animals crackers in my soup! Monkey and rabbits loop-de-loop.”

26.) Giant Woman

I am. NOT the biggest fan of Steven’s original singing voice. I feel bad saying that, since it was just Zach Callison as a kid, but he never jived well with me for some reason. So I wouldn’t listen to this on the fly. 

The song itself is still really good though, with all sorts of fun animation of Amethyst and Pearl being bitchy to each other. It’s a bit sad in hindsight to see tiny Steven trying to get his moms to get along. Ahh, season 1.

27.) Strong in the Real Way

This song has SUCH a strong start. Pearl reflecting on Sugilite’s problems, but the show making sure to show us that Pearl’s lack of enthusiasm towards her also lends itself to jealousy as well as just general malaise. How much she cares about Steven, and wants him to grow up strong. 

And then Steven just kinda. Ruins it? I appreciate his enthusiasm for tryna bulk up but to take what was starting as such a rich, personal song and broadcasting it to random strangers just makes me a bit sad. Almost a bit angry on her behalf?

28.) That Distant Shore

I KNOW this is gonna create some discourse, but I’m just not the biggest Lapis stan. I love her voice. I love the visuals of the song. And I get why she felt afraid and needed to flee.

But Lapis never got to take responsibility for her own actions. And, in the end, the song feels hollow to me- because we all know she’ll never talk to anyone about it, know she’ll burst back in and destroy the barn, and no one will ever question it. I like Lapis a lot, but I feel like her arc never was fully finished. She never got help. She never learned to feel safe.

29.) Dear Old Dad

I’ve yet to meet a single human being who likes this episode tbh. There’s some great discussion about what kind of parent Greg is from it, and what kind of dynamic he has with the Gems that he felt he had to fake an injury to hang out with his son. Honestly the first half was fine and dandy. It’s just that then they Greg just went out of his way to drag Steven away from missions and such. It never jived well with his character before or after.

Also, is it just me, or does Zach himself sound like he hates the song as he sings it? There’s no passion or heart in his voice. It sounds like they told him to read off cue cards and he did. Tom Scharpling’s best attempts didn’t save this one for being a skipper. But the episode, unfortunately, isn’t, so it gets a spot on here.

[iidasman]

✧*•.:*.• how the main boys would react to you blasting your favorite song in the car

notes: i don't normally write my own input but i live for this prompt and i love writing for it (and yall better blow this tf up i spent way too much time figuring out how to write for todoroki </3)

requested?: no.

warnings: swearing, caps lock

wc: n/a

midoriya would be concerned-? not so much that, he would be wondering why you need to yell so loud, more so.

(song - love by keyshia cole)

• he loves you

• he really does but

• pretty please stop yelling </3

• hes around katsuki all the time, so youd think hed be used to it, but he isnt used to driving with a katsuki clone screaming "NEVER KNEW WHAT I WAS MISSING, BUT I ONEW ONCE WE START KISSIN'-" his ears cant handle it

• once he gets in the car with you more, he gets used to it!

• and he will totally ask you to turn it down if it gets to be too much for him :)

• but the convos you both have while the musics blasting are so funny LMAO

"n-NAme-?? NAME! WHATS THIS SONG CALLED? HUH?? GOOD WHAT??"

bakugō would definitely sing with you, no matter the song.

• i hc that he either loves heavy metal or just like 2014 myspace mcr type bands

• he would scream with you 100%

• all the cars around you would be so worried

"hey- hey y/n, put that one song on? the one by skillet or whatever. yeah, that one."

• IF YOU HAD THE BAKUSQUAD WITH YOU THE MUSIC WOULD BE AMAZING

• minas playing pop songs everyone knows the words to, while sero and kaminari are playing stupid good songs like all star

• kirishima just vibes in the backseat

• when a simple plan or all-american rejects song comes on youll hear bakugō screaming and smiling to all the words

"YO N/N, ONCE THIS SONGS OVER, ITS YOUR TURN TO PICK ONE, GOT IT? PICK A GOOD ONE."

todoroki would be so confused, but hed softly sung along with you.

• why did you have to scream the song at full volume??

• why not just play it at a normal volume-?

• he doesn't necessarily mind it, he would just rather you put the windows down if you did blast your music

• he gets butterflies when he sees you so happy singing your favorite songs

• seeing you happy just

• UGH it makes him so happy too

• if you played one of those catchy "sad" songs like be alright by dean lewis, he would sing with you

• thats the only time he actually knows the words bc hes an edgy teen leave him alone

denki would be the one to scream the lyrics with you.

(song - dont stop me now by queen)

• loves singing with you!!!

• whether its outside the door while youre doin something in the other room, or blasting music in your/his car!

• it puts him over the moon to see you so carefree and happy

• doesnt really mind the noise, because he blasted his music even before he met you!

• even if its a super short trip to, say, the grocery store, he loves playing metallica and queen with you

• he would sing in such an annoying voice until the parts he could scream came on pls

"tonigght~ im gonna have mySELLLF A REALL GOOD TIME"

• he may or may not use his quirk to turn the music up a little,,,

kirishima is like a mix of kaminari and midoriya. he doesnt hate the music, but if its on like.. not full volume hes ok with it!

• he wont let you play songs he doesnt know, vise versa

• not bc he doesnt want you to play songs you like, he just wants to sing with you!!

• most of the time that rule doesnt exist if its a more happy song

• he would absolutely love hoizer?? hozier? idk but eijiro would live for his music

• ooh maybe mitski too?

• either way, he wants to shout the lyrics with you versus just sitting there and nodding his head

• kirishima would let you take the lead vocals though like

• if there was ever a part in the song where there was no bg music and it was just vocals, yknow those kinds of songs??

"yo, n/n! do you know that one song? i think it was by a dude named hozier?"

iida would not let you unless it was your car.

• IM SO SORRY IIDA FANS

• BUT HE WOULDNT

• he would just turn it down slowly,,, or just not let you put music on at all-

• mf would listen to elevator music or just bone at all-

• if you were driving in your car, however

• obvi yk he doesnt really enjoy the loud aspect of your music, so please turn it down for him

sero would love blasting music with you!

• so bc the mha fandom has collectively headcannoned sero as latino, he would love introducing you to his music (if you arent latino, too!)!!!

• if you arent latino or just dont listen to their cultures music, please please please show him your music

• even if its your favorite fandoms music like anime ops or game osts!! he lives hearing new stuff and learning abt it :)

• also! he loves when you sing his music!

• *disclaimer i dont know anything abt latino culture, so please tell me if these lyrics are wrong-*

"once de la noche en san salvador, el salvador,"

• its his favorite thing ever to sing with you fr

all posts on this blog belong to iidasman © 2021.

[choptop-sawyer]

Hi again 😎💫 im here to dig at ur brain again bcs i. M. Aaa sorry i just love ur stuff but. I have this kinda rly specific storyline type hc area and I'd love to hear any hcs you might get from it if its at all jr thing. But um I keep sometimes thinking back to the idea of kinda, vaguely growing up in the same area as the Sawyers, being childhood friends (and being stupid 2gether, running arount the countryside, ditching school & playing in corn fields) -

But then having to leave in your late teens to school / whatever (I mean 😎 my sappy ass also thinks abt mutual pining w Bobby but you know...... nearly unrelated.......)

Then, later on (Bobbys now Chop Top, Nubbins is..... dead I guess but also >:( maybe not, the family is up to being a mess etc) returning to town to take a break from work or whatever. N meeting up w the family again, i mean, oblivious to the bullshit they get up to but.... yk

This is a bit rambly i should probs have waited to sleep but I can't get the thought of returning to the Sawyer door wearing Bobbys tie dye sweatshirt that hr borrowed u years ago and all the impact of being a former family member bc u were also kind of an outsider or whatever but also the drama of leaving so uwu sksjd

This got so long. All i wanted to ask is: sawyer family headcanons for a childhood friend returning to town after being away for years. Rip.

THANK YOU FOR SENDING THIS god I love the image too of just standing in the doorway,, you're not home, you've changed a little bit, but you still fit into some of the old aspects you know so well they fit you and cover you.

Actually this is great because that fic that I swear exists has pretty much the same premise but!!! I can make this one less tragic than that one. 😎

(This is mostly Chop Top n you centric please don't mind)

Also this timeline is all fucky. I think that as soon as Chop came home from Vietnam the Sawyers had basically uprooted themselves and were living in North Texas because of the... Hardesty incident. But like can we pretend that that never happened they r still there in Newt? Just for this. (Hope you like it!)

Chop Top's Childhood Friend Returns

You don't think you would have turned out the way you did without the Sawyers.

They were the main element of your childhood, a mystery that you had to be a part of. A mystery, because they were closed off. Mistrustful. The sickness of small towns carried to the extreme, because they were mostly alone. The loneliness made them more miserable, the misery made them more isolated. A cycle, a legacy.

So it was a a miracle that you were even allowed to be apart of some of it, but you attribute that miracle to Bobby.

He seemed to think you were as much of mystery as what you thought the Sawyers were. Two kids looking through a small window into another world. But he liked that. He liked that you were something different, something new. From beyond that small world of loneliness that lived in the house.

You learned quickly that he had a desire for anything beyond that world. So he'd invite you out with him, when you were kids, to run free in the tall grass, when you got older, to drive with him to places unknown. He had a knack for finding these odd places, and he always brought you along with the music cranked up loud on the radio.

Bobby told you many times that he wanted to see the world. He had this lust for life that went beyond the restlessness of the young. He also said that he wanted to bring you along with him when he saw the world. You didn't ever mention how that always made your heart skip a beat when he said that.

Maybe you should have. But the past is the past and you can't change that.

You knew the other Sawyers too, but Bobby tended to avoid them sometimes. But occasionally, you got to hang out with them.

Nubbins was an enigma. You didn't think Nubbins was his real name. But that's the only one you heard from him, but the name situation was the least confusing thing. He was the most open person you knew. And yet you couldn't understand him, and decided at some point that you wouldn't ever. But he was fun. His energy was infectious, if he was filled with joy, you couldn't help but laugh with him too. That was Nubbins, so absent of any purposeful deceit that he was almost a mirror, you saw yourself around him, sometimes it was uncomfortable, but other times it was fun.

Bubba was the opposite. He seemed to be legitimately wary of you. Bobby once told you that Bubba didn't like to leave the house, ever. He stayed and did the chores. You wondered if he minded, being stuck with all the chores but Bobby said he didn't. It was comforting for him. Always having something set to do. You only saw him once. Nubbins had made him tag along when he needed him to hang some things from a tree. Bones from indeterminate animals, a clock with a nail through it. You don't think Nubbins actually needed Bubba to reach the branches (he climbed pretty well) but he just wanted his little brother to see his work. Bubba didn't make eye contact with you the entire time. He was wholly focused on his task of helping Nubbins. But he was gentle when he helped his brother, careful, and for that you liked him.

Drayton was... well. He was the one Bobby argued with the most. He was his brother, but with how much age between the two, it was almost hard to believe sometimes. Drayton was the one that everybody in Newt knew the most. People liked him well enough, but they said he was odd behind his back. He knew that. You don't think he trusted anything outside the insular world he and his family had existed in for years, and was at odds with Bobby because he didn't get why Bobby wanted anything to do with the world outside.

Oftentimes you would see Bobby after he and Drayton got into it. He'd be fuming, but he'd smile when he saw you. You'd leave with him whenever he came to you. These adventures were the most fun you had when you were there.

The other times you'd go off were when he'd convince you to skip school. Bobby never went himself. He didn't get the idea of all those kids sitting in classrooms for hours, doing nothing but writing and listening. Why do that when you can find things out for yourself? Get into some trouble? In his mind, he was saving you from a very boring thing.

You two knew the area around Newt well. The fields and the flat expanses were the best kind of playground. Your dreams were still set in them. A kind of sunshine filled melancholy.

Bobby told you things in the grass. His dreams yes, but his own thoughts. On music, on late night radio, on movies, on you. He perhaps thought of you as wonderful as voices on the radio, stars on the screen. He never told you that though. But your name was never far from his mouth when Bobby talked about the things he loved.

You and him loved each other as much as two kids who didn't know how to could. He was always on your mind now, with not much tangible objects to remember him with. A photograph taken by Nubbins, your faces blurred because you were laughing. A button, the pin on the back bent. A sweatshirt, which he tie dyed himself, and gave to you one night. The colors were faded. You never did get to return it.

The years away did nothing to lessen thoughts of him. No, they just blurred all together now, and the stream of the sunshine filled melancholy was almost endless. You needed a break. There was only one place you could think of that could help you with that.

So you came back. All things led back to this place eventually. Newt was dying, or dead. Didn't you see somewhere that when a ship went down, it took everything with it? You didn't want to stay for long. But you had to see all of them, you had to know that they were all not these strange figures you had dreamt up.

You went right to the house. You'd never actually been allowed inside, Bobby just always said something along the lines of 'Grandma and Grandpa are napping upstairs' or 'there's a mess' (never mind that he could care less usually about messes.) But you figured he had had a good reason. Maybe he was embarrassed.

When you knocked on the door, your heart was pounding. And that was all. Nothing happened, no indication that anyone was there. You waited, the sweatshirt was too hot but you didn't want to take it off.

Maybe you should come back another time. You were just about to turn around and leave when the door burst open, almost whacking you in the face. And there (you couldn't believe your eyes you couldn't this was a dream) he was.

Bobby had a hammer raised over his head, grinning, he was poised to swing it down, but then he saw you and he felt as if he was in a dream too.

It's been so long. He thought he made you up, a dream to carry him through misery, and you looked the part, even as you stood before him on the doorway. The light of the setting sun shone behind you, heat waves shimmered in the dusk, and you... you.

Facing each other, you stood, just staring. Over head the sky grew colorful, in the fields the grass whispered in the wind. Nothing had changed. Everything had changed. Bobby dropped the hammer and grabbed for your face, and he held it, fingers digging in so tight it hurt.

"H-hey you." He said, and fell to his knees, releasing your face. You numbly touched the marks his fingers left. Bobby still looked like a man who had seen a ghost.

You called his name, and his eyes looked lost, like he hadn't heard it in a long time. He looked up at you, and you could really get a good look at him. His face was leaner, he looked sickly and wiry, but his eyes were just as you remembered. You sank down to the porch to sit with him.

"Fuck... FUCK I didn't... I- I thought ya'd forgotten all about me... uh.. uhm. Fuck! I mean, r-really! Turnin' up out of the blue like you're some kinda... ghost or whatever... WHOA man... like, ya here to return m-my, my sweatshirt? You're wearin' it, you can keep it! You look better in it anyway... heh, fuck." He rambled on and on, hands tensing and twitching as if they were moving to touch you again, just to reaffirm your existence. Did he know how glad you were to see him? Did he know that you hadn't felt right for the longest time being away?

You forgot all about the sweatshirt, the hammer he had raised with a sadistic grin. You reached out and held one of his twitching hands, and he stilled and stopped talking. There was a peace now.

It didn't seem possible for your heart to feel this full. But it was. And by god, if this wasn't the best decision you made in your life to visit your old hometown, if only just for this moment.

Bobby stood, with your hand still in his, pulling you up. He smiled at you, and you knew you still loved him, and in your deepest heart, you knew he loved you too.

But this time around, maybe you and him could love each other right.