#bc if it hadn’t been for that
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i made myself mad by breaking down the take home pay of my current hourly to that of what mcdonald’s is offering their managers hourly (at the high end of the scale) and i make $11 over half of their take home over 2 weeks 🫶🏻
been doing hair 6 years, been with my current job for over 3, and i have only struggled to keep my head above water with small pockets of stability
#o posts#they make us depend on tips to supplement our income#which only fucks us over when we go to buy a house or car#it nearly fucked me over when i tried getting the car i had before my current one#bc they couldn’t prove my income based on my pay stubs#luckily we had tip cards that i took the money from and deposited it in my bank#bc if it hadn’t been for that#i wouldn’t have been able to get my car at all#it’s so fucking ridiculous that i’m depending on strangers for my income#because some people won’t tip you at all or if they do it’s $1-2#they don’t fucking care and i want to leave so fucking bad but i’m fucking stuck
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despite Laios low self esteem making him think that if he’d been eaten, Chilchuck and Marcille wouldn’t have helped Falin,
theres a small part of me that thinks the reason Chilchuck stayed with the party and went back in the dungeon in the first place was because he didn’t want to leave Laios alone. That Laios was moreso the reason he stayed.
#dungeon meshi#chilaios#OK SORRY. THE DEMONS. I REALLY DID NOT WANT TO LIKE THIS PAIRING. I DIDNT. BUT. HHH. FHFHJFJV. I FEEL CRAZY. LET ME EXPLAIN.#Pre canon it seems Laios is the person Chilchuck is really the closest to#He gets along with Namari and they are probably way better as buddies than he and Laios but#He and Laios seem *closer*#If that makes sense#Laios calls him his first name enough and without any issue or hesitation from Chilchuck#That I sort of inagine its not like. A misunderstanding. Laios is on a first name basis with him for a reason.#He also worries probably more than anyone about Laios#And his biggest criticism of him is that hes “reckless”#he’s comfortable around Laios in a very specific way and so is Laios around him#and in the series he shows many times that he’ll risk his life to protect Laios#Like staying with him to confront the elves because he was worried Laios would say something stupid#Hes the first one to run up to him when Falin punches him#I mean I think he was also going back for Falin like its not like I think he doesn’t care about her or anything#He clearly does#But I don’t know if he’d have gone back if Laios hadn’t#And if Laios had been eaten I think he wouldn’t have even had to be convinced by Falin#I also think Marcille would’ve gone back for him but probably more bc Falin was going back#Like sort of a reversed thing#AGAIN not that I don’t think she cared about Laios at the beginning either#But she before the story she was mostly Falin’s friend who knew Laios through Falin#She only really got to know him when Falin got eaten and they had to do a team building exercise#Though now I sort of want to see an actually reversed scenario#Bc we also know that Chilchuck is sort of uncomfortable around Falin (said in relationship chart)#So I would love to see them be forced into a team building exercise to find a person they both love the way Laios and Marcille were
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I do think that referring to Essek as irredeemable for regretting his actions only because he was caught and risked losing his friends is both kind of reductive to him as a character and a misunderstanding of the concept of redemption arcs in media.
A person generally isn't changed because you sit them down and hand them a bunch of political theory to read. They change because their circumstances and relationships do. It's like that guy who was deradicalized because he got a bunch of shrimp and started to care for them. It’s our relationships that change us, because they give us not a logical but an emotional reason to do so.
Caleb explicitly says "these people will change you" (or something along that line; I don’t remember the exact quote). Essek, before the m9, didn’t genuinely care about anyone. The people who would die if a war started because of his actions were irrelevant and abstract to him. Caleb, similarly, also started c2 not really caring about others. He had no interest in taking on Ikithon or the Assembly to save others from going through what he did, too preoccupied with his own trauma and his own goals to care. In that sense, he started the campaign in a similar place as Essek post ep. 97: regretful, but too busy wallowing in his own self-loathing to productively do anything to prevent future harm due to his previous actions.
Being with the m9, being reminded of the importance of other people and realizing that they’re capable of caring for them, is what changes Caleb and Essek both. Of course Essek starts out more concerned with losing the nein than with strangers killed in a war. They’re his starting step, the opening through which he realizes that the people hurt by his actions are real, that he cares, that he has the ability to, if not undo his harm, help stop furthering of it.
#critical role#cr2#essek thelyss#nella talks cr#esseks return has brought back old essek discourse#and I'm taking the excuse to ruminate on the nature of redemption in fiction#like lets not forget that essek starts out categorized as literally evil#caleb had over a decade to carry his guilt and regret before the entrance of the m9#he wasn't good yet but he hadn’t been evil for a while#(and lets not pretend young caleb wasn't categorized as evil. he was brainwashed sure but he was just as responsible for his actions as any#radicalized young adult who made the choice to hurt others. boy tortured and murdered people bc he believed in nationalistic propaganda)#essek in comparison spedruns his redemption bc he has the m9 from the start#but he’s still going to need some time. you can’t expect him to immediately Become Good
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wwaid (what would aabria iyengar do)
#saw emily had one but hadn’t seen one for aabria and thought that needed to be rectified bc lbr she is one of my reasons for living#mari is irrelevant#dimension 20#aabria iyengar#quiddie#the ravening war#trw#a court of fey and flowers#acofaf#misfits and magic#mismag#i would tag her many other wonderful things she has been a part of alas i have not watched any dnd content outside of d20 so
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shep. i finished xisuma's s8. i am plagued with so many thoughts /silly
Oh my gognfjgmgimfggfmgnmfdnffgh it’s. It’s so much. I have so much to say and so many thoughts they make me so crazy. They make me so crazy THEY MAKE ME SO CRAZY IS THIS THING ON CAN ANYONE HEAR ME
#hermitcraft#ask#artsy-book#hermitcraft season 8#xisumavoid#xisuma#evil x#not tagging this dbhc bc im talking about canon xisuma#not to say there aren’t theme overlaps but#yeah#the way I could write an essay about Xisuma’s mental state at the end of the season. what it must be like#to slowly come out of that state of being literally manipulated and controlled… to slowly like. gain consciousness again only to find#that the moon has gotten so big that it’s like. too late to do anything.#that he had been so distracted and busy with making the evil empire as profitable and helpful to the hermits as possible#that he just… hadn’t noticed#or been manipulated to believe it wasn’t a bug deal#big deal#or that it was just a rumor#and now it’s too late#but also… the moon is the REASON he’s free from EX’s control#isn’t it.#so… isn’t there a part of him that kind of NEEDS the moon to get closer?#so he can be free?#not that I think Xisuma ignoring the moon was an entirely conscious choice#anyway I’m fine about xisuma finally being free only to realize hermitcraft (and his hermits) are doomed#could he have done anything to stop it had he known about it earlier? who knows#I’m sure xisuma will say for a long time that he could have#but he didn’t in the end#and it wasn’t really his fault but i’m sure he’ll say it was#I need to stop talking before I’m dragged away
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Marvel will never convince me that Steve and Natasha weren’t in constant contact during the blip years bc (besides the fact that they’ve been partners for the better part of a decade prior to this including those *two years* on the run together) people who haven’t seen each other in five years don’t operate like they did the rest of that movie (joined at the hip, communicating constantly across the room with looks and nods, taking on every situation as a unit)
It seems to me that they just had Steve leave her/the compound bc they didn’t like the implications of ‘Steve and Natasha have been living in the avengers compound alone together for the past five years’ and came up with a reason for him to leave her so we’d believe he was suddenly into Peggy again
#romanogers#they were in love idc#should’ve been them#Steve didn’t deserve the giant dump they took on his character development in this movie#smh#endgame#avengers#mcu#marvel#tbh I know a lot of people who assumed they were a couple in iw#if they hadn’t gone out of their way to keep them apart#I honestly would’ve just kept assuming that tbh#but endgame starts and he’s suddenly like#omg Peggy the love of my life#who’s loss I’m apparently still more upset about than all of my other best friends who *just* got blipped out of existence#like we get almost no Steve content for seven years#bc they didn’t both let giving us a movie of him and nat and Sam on the run#which would’ve been awesome#and then we see him again in endgame and he’s suddenly completely fixated on Peggy ??#like sorry I’m calling bs on that one idc#make it make sense
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i do tend to think we are at this point a little overly reliant on the trinity as a concept. like instead of creating a new miniature Wonder Woman to pair with damian and jon, why not look at the existing superheroes of a similar age and see who has a good dynamic to complete their group. why does it have to be a super, a wonder, and a bat.
diana and clark and bruce are good because of the history between them, and that is not necessarily reliant on the legacy mantles they wear. we seem to understand this, at least to some extent, in that we aren’t always pairing a lantern with an arrow despite the success and love for hal and ollie and the way they’ve worked as a team throughout history.
but for some reason every bat has to have a super and a wonder at his side (and it is he; Cass and Steph (and Duke) don’t get this. wonder why.) even when it means erasing those characters’ core traits or inventing a new one whole cloth just to make sure The Trinity remains intact. and frankly it’s a little weird. I’d rather just see them with characters that make sense based on the development of stories and plotlines over time. idk maybe i’m just picky.
#I’m not even really bringing up the example of this that ACTUALLY makes me mad bc I don’t want to be shot#but there is one bat. who was given a trio. wherein the original character of the other members of his trio were erased.#for the sake of making him a team that suited his story.#and it made me so mad to see one person in particular made into a love interest and rewritten to be something she hadn’t been previously#so that he could have that#:)#text.tb
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the royal order of sartorial splendor blog isn’t available anymore :(
#not sure how long bc i just noticed but i get a “you don’t have permission to view this blog” message when i try#i know it hadn’t been updated in years but the archive was really great :(#morgan talks
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[ 2ND CHILDREN / 5TH CHILDREN ]
— The truth is, Unit 02 simply isn’t compatible with the other EVAs. (E14)
— I never imagined this boy could synchronize with Unit 02 without replacing its core. Quite astonishing. (E24)
Death & Rebirth Pamphlet / Cruel Angel’s Thesis OP / EVA-02 wiki / DEATH (TRUE ²) / E16 / E24 / DEATH (TRUE ²) / E22 / 3.0: You Can (Not) Redo Cover / E09 / The End of Evangelion / E09 / E24 / NGE Manga / The End of Evangelion
#neon genesis evangelion#nge#asuka langley soryu#kaworu nagisa#shinji ikari#mine#there’s something here that I find really interesting wrt narrative relevance#bc both asuka + kaworu r rly important thematically#point blank the show would be fundamentally different w/o asuka in it#but asuka exists outside of the ikari bloodline#if shinji dies there’s no show. if rei dies she’s replace bc she’s still necessary#asuka was incapacitated and they brought in a new pilot#all asuka wants is to be the most narratively relevant person in the room but she’s the least. she exists outside of the ikari bloodline#and so she ranks below shinji and she ranks below rei#unit 02 isn’t compatible w any of the other evas!#meanwhile kaworu is what kickstarts instrumentality. but if it hadn’t been kaworu it would’ve been smth else#he’s there for five minutes and then he’s gone. he shows up in glimpses#he doesn’t get to actually matter either not beyond a concept#i think there’s smth that ties them together there#which ofc makes their relationship to shinji fascinating#also lol I wasn’t going to include this as actually being anything but I do think it’s funny that 2+3=5 get it#2nd children + 3rd children = 5th children#im very funny#anyway where kaworu idealizes shinji well asuka has to tear him down#and in many ways this is for the same reason#all of the kids are means to an end. but i think asuka and kaworu r this the most#bc they could be anyone. Thats the thing#there’s no reason it has to be them. they could be anyone#the joke addition is ofc: feliz jueves vs quieres ser mi novio shinji?
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it’s been lovely to be on instagram today to see all of the heartwarming stories about mark margolis shared by brba and bcs actors, but my favorite has got to be from vincent fuentes (arturo), who shared some texts that mark sent him:
bonus:
#mark margolis#vincent fuentes#michael mando#better call saul#bcs#hector salamanca#also i hadn’t even heard about mm being cast in a ridley scott production#how could you blow that dude???#it’s also hilarious bc apparently he’s been replaced with wagner moura#who#(and no shade to michael mando whom i love)#is a much better actor#mando is great! don’t get me wrong!#but wagner moura in narcos is one of my favorite performances of all time#(they both have shaky spanish tho apparently 🤷♀️)#all the articles about this are hilarious bc in true hollywood reporting style they keep dropping his age#so they all basically read:#a 41-year-old grown adult man physically fought his coworker
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maybe a hot take but please don’t have or stop having children if you have an active eating disorder/body dysmorphia (including binge eating, not just restrictive disorders). seriously
thinking you’ll be the exception (because you’re So self-aware, unlike those Other disordered women) and won’t give your dysmorphia/eating disorder to your child is pride before a very slow and terrible fall
it never ever works. you’re never ever immune. i mean, such a huge reason of why there are so many of us now is bc our moms thought the same thing lmfao. didn’t matter how well-intentioned they were. no matter how much they tried to separate Their Problems from Ours. here we fucking are
i know it’s not women’s fault to begin with, but the reality is that those of us affected do incubate, nurture, and pass on the virus in the Current Way of Things
the buck needs to stop here. this isn’t a game. think of all the things your mother probably thought she was expertly hiding from you that you still picked up on and were profoundly affected by in a terrible and formative way. it will happen to you, too. don’t think it won’t.
if you know that you’re not solidly and confidently recovered, you have a responsibility to stop that buck and not actively attempt to create a child who will observe, mimic, internalize, adopt, and inherit your lifelong life-ruining behavior. the selfishness is breathtaking honestly
#eating disorders are one of the most treatment-resistant behavioral issues out there#once they take firm root#this is not quite the same as ‘don’t have children if you’re even a little bit mentally ill’ btw before anyone thinks it is#this is a very specific problem#and it is LEARNED#you cant always protect your child from the outside world influence but you can do something about what your child starts with at home#i am recovered now but i could’ve saved my whole life if my mom hadn’t been dieting when i was 7#so i started dieting too#bc she was my mom and i did what she did#cuz i was fucking 7#she never told me what a diet was. i just observed her.#and when she binged EYE binged#i blame her always for my food addiction
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okay wait maybe it’s time to redownload hsr again bc wdym sunday is finally coming and i’m getting robinhill moments too??
#[𐐪— rheya talks. 𐑂]#i literally hadn’t pulled anyone waiting for sunday#he’s finally here#and and and#the way i’ve been on the robinhill train since early penacony and everyone hated them#but now on my tiktok all i see is compilations of them talking to each other in the update#like wdym he calls her singing queen???#that’s actually so cute#i love them fr#but also…. i deleted hsr bc i don’t have storage#how tf am i supposed to get it back now#sobs
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got a new laptop, feeling like a kid on christmas eve & I’m learning to use notion bc idk it fits the agenda of today (which is to transfer my life onto this one now)
#(new laptop bc everything broke on me lol and like it was time)#also I’m finally living the dream & started it from fresh so won’r be carrying around all those highschool essays#bunch of downloading etc now tho bc there’s nothing (been at this for 5h already lmao but it’s fun honestly)#i’m so glad tho that most of the things I do are somewhere on the internet/cloud bc didn’t lose too much work now that the old laptop won’t#open anymore (just like one commit that I hadn’t yet pushed to github and a thesis ’’brain dumb’’ thing but I dont think I had anything too#important there (I hope bc like if I did oh well it’s gone & I dont remember))#february 2024#2024
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Got some Bnuyus in Minecraft, one black & one brown, guess what I named them
AND THEN GUESS WHAT HAPPENED
They actually have 8 kids but I didn’t take a more recent photo
,,then guess what I did
Also a lil difference between my two Rabitos
#I kept slapping carrots at them way before I named them actually#I have to keep them fenced in or they’ll run away & I need to keep my bun army#kny#demon slayer#octo’s art#tomioka giyuu#sabito#Sabigiyuu#Rabbitcraft au#I actually have no idea if this will be a whole au but I hadn’t planned for Sabibun to become a whole au & look where we are now with that#might as well name it now in case any other ideas come to me#Yall I was going THROUGH it with Minecraft last night#like almost too busy dying & getting my bed blown up & getting CREEPERS out of my house to focus on new years midnight long enough#playing on normal difficultly lmaoo#only been playing Craft for less than a year & I never get far bc I run out of things I wanna do#never been to the Nether or anything#but I DO have a nice Cherry house now :D
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if the southern raiders had been written with a focus on katara and sokka’s relationship with each other and with grief, the conflict would have revolved around whether confronting someone who caused you trauma is necessary to heal or would only end up causing you more pain. both choices would be presented as equally understandable and a personal choice one has to make for themself, rather than manufacturing conflict over the “right” or “wrong” way to deal with grief to uplift one person’s moral philosophy over another’s.
katara, having looked into the eyes of her mother's murderer just before he killed her mother for protecting her, had a uniquely traumatic experience with her mother's death that was different from her brother. especially because katara ended on taking on her mother's role after her death, which is an emotional burden that sokka did not have to bear. sokka's trauma from his mother's death is tied more to the aftermath of losing his mother, and then later his father to the war rather than a personal hatred for the faceless man who killed his mother. this doesn't make his grief lesser, just different.
so it would only make sense that in the southern raiders, sokka would be opposed to katara going after yon rha. not because he doesn't deserve to die - because sokka is not a pacifist, he understands the realities of war. sokka would worry that facing yon rha would hurt katara more than it would ever help her heal. because for him, confronting yon rha would mean putting a face to the war that broke his family apart - a despicable person that he doesn't like to think about, a person that he would never want to see.
but katara is different. she needs this closure, she needs to face the terrible man who took her mother away and not be that scared little girl who ran away all over again. she needs this trip to deal with the survivor's guilt she's been carrying with her for the last six years. and it makes sense that sokka doesn't understand that at first. just as it makes sense that katara doesn't understand why sokka wouldn't want the same.
that's why at the end of the episode, katara is in a better state mentally than she was earlier. even though she is still conflicted over her choice not to kill yon rha, she needed to face the personification of her trauma, the representation of the childhood she lost, and that was what helped her heal - it really wasn't about choosing "peace" or "violence." and the episode should have ended with a conclusion between katara and sokka, in which both come to understand that the pain they experienced over their mother's death was different, and so they each had a different (but equally valid) way of coping with their grief.
(as a side note - this is also why zuko is the perfect person to accompany katara on her journey. they both have very similar experiences with grieving the loss of their mothers who sacrificed themselves for them, and both choose to confront the man who took their mother away from them, which helped them both to heal. zuko understands katara's need to face the person that has caused her trauma, even if sokka and aang do not understand at first because their experiences were different)
#katara#sokka#atla critical#atla#the southern raiders#and a little#aang critical#katara analysis#sokka analysis#my meta#my post#i still believe tsr is one of the most well written episodes bc of the way that it explores katara's trauma which has been built up since b#but it would have been better if the creators hadn’t been so intent on prioritizing aang’s feelings over sokka’s
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the temptation of writing an Outsider POV fic on mid twenties private detective Shinichi and his funky teenage interns that are all horribly morbid
#dcmk#aus and ideas#shinichi kudo#detective conan#being Conan has taught shinichi that sometimes you gotta break some laws to solve crimes#which is why he isn’t a cop. he’s fully aware he’s breaking the law and has some integrity about it#also I think it would be funny if shinichi was being consulted about a case#while sitting in a cell bc he broke into the murderer’s home#I think adult shinichi has the potential to be fucking weird#in ways he wouldn’t have been if he hadn’t spent ages as a primary school kid
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