#bc if it Is a cyst again

[calamitouscynic]

.

[thecowboykatsuki-anon]

Shout out to my mom for passing on the genetic health problems to me but the big tit gene to my younger sister and then dying before I could ask for history on said genetic health issues. Real cash money of her

[dykethang]

the nurses "prescribed" netflix and lots of rest and after sleeping all day today i am choosing to interpret the netflix part as me being allowed to rewatch shameless again .

[deadrlngers]

went to get a refill of raoul's cbd prescription for his hips pain and the vet jokingly told me "you can take a few drops too for headaches". girl i live with a category 8 headache every day of my life, do not tempt me

[larnax]

"congratulations ma'am the hysterectomy went well" while im sitting there like

[bluebellhairpin]

Ever since I had that ovarian cyst burst, I get flashbacks when my lower tummy hurts.

[gentlethorns]

i hate my fucking body. i hate that it's turned against me and now it seems like there is always something wrong w me or something not working the way it should. i feel so much anger towards my body bc it literally feels like it works against me constantly and ik that's not a good relationship to have w my body but it's so frustrating to constantly have to overcome how my body feels so i can do the things i want or need to do

[zaiinab]

first fast has begun

[spacealiencafe]

insurance probably wouldn’t cover whatever’s wrong with me anyway

[crispy-ghee]

anxious boy is at the vet again bc the cyst on his paw was looking bad

[sergle]

had to go to the vet today bc Theo (cat) has a HUGE fuckin cyst on his neck (pastulio), also had to fix someone's commission, also had to call my doc to try and get my meds refilled and he didn't answer the phone and is probably too technologically incompetent to ever call me back so I'll have to try again, also we all struck out getting a personal loan to pay for the kia engine eaeaauUUHhhh

[blood-mocha-latte]

so i made a quiz a minute back and there was a question about my guinea pigs and a lot of people. followed up on that and wanted to know more lmao. AND if you've been here for even .5 seconds you are aware that i. love talking about my pets so let's get into it

i. Perdita Sue

name: -- perdita for 101 Dalmations (since she's black and white) -- sue for Sue Hendrickson (a world renowned paleontologist)

fun fact: as stated by the quiz she fucking. loves her water bottle. when she was a baby we were worried she had a blockage in her throat because she kept slamming it back against the wall of the hutch REALLY LOUDLY and her sister didn't do that. so we took her to the vet. nothings wrong. maybe it was just a thing when she was a baby no. no she just really fucking loves her water bottle and likes making it really loud

worst experience: she cut her paw open on a piece of hay when she was about a year and a half old and was bleeding SO FUCKING MUCH i almost missed a class final to stay home with her. she was fine lol

best experience: she likes to shake hands. i have a photo of this somewhere. if you put your hand down in the hutch she'll run over and put both her paws in your palm so you can "shake" them it's the funniest fucking thing

ii. Mei Rosalind

name: -- mei for my fiancee's middle name lmao (lenora-mei) -- rosalind for Rosalind Franklin (biochemist who discovered the structure of dna)

fun fact: again as in the quiz, she likes sunbeams. a whole fuckin' lot. like, too much. it was about noon and i walked into the room they're in and she was on her back. lil paws in the air. and i thought she was Fucking Dead but no. she was just sunbathing

worst experience: she once sneezed in my mouth and i thought i was gonna die

best experience: when i was studying for my organic chem final she slept on my desk the whole time and just generally kept me from Flipping The Desk and giving up lmao

iii. Meg Helen

name: -- meg for meg jay (clinical psychologist on adult development) -- helen for. helen keller. bc she's blind

fun fact: the only guinea pig we got from a pet store, who we weren't actually going to get. but she was curled up in the corner of a too small cage and was obviously miserable, so we ended up biting the bullet and adopting her. took her to the vet, vet told us she is The Most Blind Animal she has ever had the pleasure of meeting. take that as you will

worst experience: we got her when she was just a little over a week old and she had to be quarantined from the others. we ended up having to switch off and sit with her at night because she'd cry the whole time and she has the saddest fucking wheek

best experience: she has the croakiest voice of all time. we're pretty sure it's the same genetic inbreeding problems that made her blind, but it doesn't hurt her and it sounds Hilarious. when she finally got out of her quarantine hutch and to her real one (which is 45 feet squared lmao) she didn't stop popcorning and squeaking for fifteen minutes. i cried my fiancee cried i took a video and sent it to my parents and they cried it was a day

iv. Piper Florence

name: -- piper for the pied piper of war because she's the leader and the others follow after her like she's the. the pied piper -- florence for florence nightingale because again if you've been here for more than .5 seconds you know that i am a. healthcare bitch

fun fact: once jumped out of the hutch and then just stood in the middle of the room because she didn't know where to go. is Best Friends with meg and shows her where everything is in the hutch when we have to change it/replace objects. she does not like sue and ignores her. just doesn't like her there's nothing to be done

worst experience: we thought she had ovarian cancer about a year ago because she was lethargic/sick/swollen etc for a long period of time. tracking her poop what she ate all of that etc etc. turns out that she had a cyst which was still a fucking nightmare, but hey at least it wasn't cancer

best experience: when my fiancée got really sick a few years back piper would just sit on her chest and purr. it was cute and needed and she's fuckin BEEN there man she's basically our dog

anyways that's it. congratulations if you got through it all lmao. i also have four cats (i am. not good at fostering) and a dog so maybe i'll make a post about them idk. ok bye

[squeakadeeks]

had a wild one yesterday, had to go to the hospital and i have thoughts

honestly the whole thing was not that big of a deal, but it was a wild day.

I woke up at 5am, felt ok but with a mild pain in my left side. got ready and started going to work thinking "huh ok this pain is getting a little bit worse than i'd like but no big deal". got there and within an hour it went from "ouchie" to "HOLY FUCK". i tried to start with urgent care, but got sent to the ER immediately. spent the whole day there doing tests and imaging and they did actually find something which is a huge relief. plus what they found explains my experience to a tee so it offers some peace of mind.

but the funniest things to me are the following:

i know they have to do this, but I find it funny when the nurses ask "are you sexually active?" and I'm like "no" and then theyre like..."have you ever been sexually active" and again the answer is no, and the nurse is always without fail weird about it. like being apologetic bc i dont have any game, asking a bunch of questions like "are you sure", which ?? ??? girl what ??? ?? and most commonly thinking that im lying, when its like first of all:

second of all:

most of the time i get a kick out of how flustered they get when presented with the idea of an adult who has literally no interest in having sex despite that being a well known sexual orientation (like babygirl how in the hell is this a novel idea to you). but this time what ticked me off is they didn't believe me when i told them i had never been sexually active so much that they actually ordered a pregnancy test without telling me. which is also annoying bc my symptoms wouldve made no sense with pregnancy so they pretty much just did it because they didnt believe me.

and 2:

I was in horrible pain from a cyst and needed to get bloodwork done. but the person doing my blood work was so aggressive and bad at it that they had to try my left arm, right arm, and then my left hand and they burst the vein in all three locations. i've never had that happen before normally my blood draws are routine and painless. they also botched my hand blood draw so badly that my whole hand is bruised and swollen and ngl?? the pain is comparable to the cyst. like that nurse FUCKED me up. i wont go into detail about some of the specifics about what she did that was so painful during the draw bc it makes my skin crawl just thinking about how she handled the needle inside the vein but it was BAD bad.

hell of a day. im happy they found something and all but between being undiagnosed as asexual and having a nurse just absolutely fuck up my whole scene during a blood draw im just like. girl.

[intern-seraph]

hush my darling, don't fear my darling

After an incident in Alchemy, you flee to the Botanical Gardens to have a breakdown in private. Of course, things don't go quite as you expected — but that's not always a bad thing.

i started this fic when i was in a pretty shit place emotionally+self-esteem-wise. finished it in a similar state. so this is literally just leoyuu hurt/comfort bc i needed another clinically depressed person 2 cuddle me. intended as romantic, but can easily be read as platonic as well :) read beneath the cut!

Originally posted on Ao3

CWs: some gross medical metaphors, low self-esteem, nameless nrc students being nrc students (rude assholes)

You hate it when you get like this. After 5 overblots, you should be tougher. Tougher than this, tougher than breaking down over some stupid comment from an asshole classmate. But, well, you can’t really stop the tears once they start, so all you want to do right now is find an isolated place to hide and cry it out. Showing weakness in front of your classmates is a no-go. You’ve only recently managed to earn the rest of the school’s respect. That would put you back at square one.

“Why did the Headmage let a useless, magicless klutz like you in?”

It’s not even the meanest thing you’ve been called in your time here in Twisted Wonderland. But something about the venom in your classmate’s words as you sat sprawled out in a sea of broken glass just made you crack. You let Professor Crewel chew out the boy after helping you up and checking you for any injuries and fled the room. Ace and Deuce and Grim didn’t have any chance to follow you.

He ran into you! It wasn’t even your fault! You scold yourself again for taking his insult so personally, but that only brings you closer to the brink of tears. Angrily, you mash the heel of your palm into your eyes to get rid of the tears threatening to finally slip free. With your free hand, you reach out and open the door to the botanical garden. There’s nobody here at this time of day, not unless Professor Crewel needs someone to grab ingredients.

Well, nobody save for one person. But Leona is probably outside napping in a patch of sunlight (like the big kitty cat he is); at least, you hope he is. You don’t want him to see you like this. You don’t want him to see how pathetic you really are.

You duck under a mass of large, broad leaves. Your breath lodges in your chest, a hard lump of hurt that oozes out of you in quick bursts like fluid from a lanced cyst. Nobody’s here. You can cry now. The sobs you’ve been holding back make your body shake. Sharp, painful gulps of breath punctuate the thrum of your pulse in your ears. Clutching your uniform blouse, you fold in on yourself.

“... Hey, Herbivore.”

It sounds like you’re underwater. You move with the same sluggishness as you look up to meet Leona’s eyes. His face appears in blurry smears, though his frown manages to pierce through your tears.

“Oi. Hey. Quit crying,” he mutters, reaching out one hesitant hand while the other runs through his hair. “Look at me. Breathe.”

All you can do is wail even louder. He winces. Then, he seems to toss aside his reservations and touches your shoulder. In one sharp, jerky motion, you lurch into his arms. Leona hisses, but catches you nonetheless. Your trembling hands clutch at his vest as you cry into his chest.

“H-hey, whoa.” His hands fumble for only a moment before he wraps his arms around you more firmly. He pats your head with a distinct discomfort. “You’re getting snot all over me,” he says without malice. In one smooth motion, he scoops you up and cradles you like you’re made of porcelain. You let him carry you over to the shade of one of the larger plants and seat you on his lap. His touch grows more confident as he rubs your back and rocks you from side to side. “Breathe for me, Herbivore. Nice ‘n slow. I’ll do it with you, even. In… and out.”

You hiccup, but manage to mimic his slow, deep breaths. He scratches your scalp as a reward, the gentle scrape of his blunt nails helping to ground you.

“That’s better, yeah?” Without looking up, you nod. A slow sigh hisses through his teeth. “I hate seein’ you cry like that.”

“Sorry,” you mumble into his clothes.

“‘S not your fault. What the hell happened to make you cry like that?” He keeps scratching. You melt, sniffling but no longer sobbing. It takes a moment to put your thoughts together.

“It’s stupid.”

“So?”

“I-It’s really, really stupid. You’ll laugh.”

“Try me.”

You hesitate. With a slow, halting breath, you say, “There was an accident in Alchemy. One of my classmates yelled at me.” You don’t let him respond before you continue, “See? I told you it’s stupid.”

“An accident? Are you hurt?” Leona pushes you back so he can look you over. You bat at his hands and chest in protest.

“I’m not hurt! I swear! The only thing hurt is my pride…” You try to laugh, but it comes out as more of a croak. He scowls at you. “Don’t look at me like that!”

“You —” he yanks you into his chest, hand curling around the back of your head and keeping you firmly in place “— are such a pain in the ass. How about you let someone else worry about you for once in your life?”

“Didn’t think you cared.”

He scoffs. “Idiot,” he mutters as he squeezes you. “You’re part of my pride. ‘Course I care.” A gentle rumble builds in his chest as he flops onto his back, bringing you with him. He buries his face in your hair, ignoring the way you squirm. “Quit moving.”

“Leona, I’m fine now!”

“So?” He rolls you both onto your sides. Peering over his shoulder, you can see his tail flick with contentment. “You interrupted my nap, so I’m keeping you until I’m done with this one. ‘Sides, aren’t you all tuckered out from all that crying?”

That kills any argument. Because you are tired. Exhausted, even. After all, you ran all the way here from the alchemy lab, and you cried so hard…

With a sigh, you relent and wriggle closer. You don’t miss his quiet, triumphant chuckle, nor the subtle press of his lips to your scalp. “Fine,” you mumble, “but only for an hour or two.”

“Sure, Herbivore.”

Several hours later, you wake up drenched in dew, but warm and safe in the arms of a slumbering lion.

[heartfucksmouth]

spent the night in the ER. As we all may or may not know, I got an IUD placed in Oct when I was 4 months postpartum.

I've been bleeding ever since. Not "spotting," but bleeding. Heavily. I've had ultrasounds to check on the position - it's in place. at 6 months of bleeding, I was put on Junel Fe to see if it would calm down. Nope. I started getting cramping so bad, I thought I had another cyst burst. I was getting really big clots/tissue.

Back to the doctors, I'm taken off Junel and put on doxycycline bc I guess it can slow the bleeding? and an ultrasound is scheduled for the first week in June, where, after imaging, I'd most likely have it taken out.

well, 3 days later and I'm bleeding so heavily and passing tissue like I've given birth. I bled through a heavy overnight pad in 3 hours, and left a blood pool on my cough 6 inches wide. the tissue I passed was like the size of my palm. I called the on-call midwife and she told me to go to the ER.

So, new pants, fresh pad (heavy flow overnight ~guaranteed 10 hours!~, I go to the ER and I'm ofc crying bc I didn't know wtf is going on and I hate leaving Aidan. I think I sat in the waiting room for less than 2 hours, getting up twice to get vitals and bloodwork done. When i got up to be wheeled to ultrasound, I realized I had bled through my pad and my pants again. Badly. I told the attendant while holding up my blood covered hand and he just went "oh. I'm sorry" LOL K

The tech tells me to get undressed and get on the table etc and I'm like "um, I'm bleeding like really really bad.." she was just like "it's fine" and left. I'm crying a little, and I pull down my underwear and I shit you not, felt clots and blood just gush out and splatter on the floor.

Now I'm sobbing bc there's nothing for me to clean it up, I can't find a trash can, and I just keep bleeding anyways, so I put some paper towels over the murder scene on the floor and lay on the bed, covering my face with my arm unable to stop crying. the tech is a cold bitch as usual and then I'm told to get dressed (in my bloody clothes thanks!) and sit in the wheelchair to be picked up.

the attendant. brings me back. to the waiting room. WHICH HAS BEEN PACKED WITH PEOPLE BY THE WAY! I'm crying still, and I get out if the chair and go to the desk to be like "hi I'm bleeding through my clothes??" but the male nurse grabbed and was like "THERE YOU ARE! I've got a room ready for you! I tried to call ultrasound but they didn't answer. what were you looking for?" and I just mumbled that I didn't want to get blood on the furniture as I followed him.

he had the nurse get me mesh underwear and pads and it was the first time I felt like someone empathize with me. he said "it's gonna be ok" with a reassuring look, and left.

I waited a while in there. listening to the ridiculous chaos that they were dealing with, all definitely more acute than me - esp bc my bloodwork showed I wasn't bleeding out or anything. a man with dementia was being aggressive with the staff even though he had broken ribs and a pneumothorax and had been dosed with fentanyl. he kept trying to dismantle his bed, almost broke his foot, and I was just waiting for one of the nurses to get hurt.

I got a pelvic exam, and the doctor used about 12 gigantic swabs trying to get all the clots he saw. he said "yeah i see what you mean, it's a slow constant ooze" wow, I feel sexy.

ultrasound was apparently clear, and he asked if I preferred to go home for the night or stay -bc he wanted me to be seen by obgyn within 2 days. I chose to go home. it was after midnight. I asked for scrubs to go home in and thankfully got some.

my ultrasound showed my right ovary was fine, no torsion,cyst etc. then "suboptimal view of left ovary due to secondary location"

sorry What. also my uterus is LARGE and my endometrium is thickened to 11mm AND THATS AFTER 7 MONTHS OF BLEEDING THAT i KEPT GETTING TOLD WAS My UTERINE LINING THINNING OUT BC THATS THE IUD'S JOB

all I can think is endo/adenomyosis/cancer.

so I'm getting this thing (the iud) taken out. I want my hormones checked. and the dr im seeing already said i can get a hysterectomy or my tubes tied or whatever. and I can't stop thinking of my aunt who died of ovarian cancer bc they failed to catch it in time despite her going to doctors constantly with symptoms.

I'm really scared,actually. my history of medical trauma is on hyperdrive. I feel like I'm failing my kid. I'm not capable of being the mom I want to be. I feel betrayed and sabotaged by my body again. I also can't think straight whatsoever so I could be misunderstanding the meanings of things.

just don't kill me you piece of shit meatsack. not now that I've been trying to actually stay alive.

[ashleywool]

why are menstrual cycles

I began birth control meds a few years ago when my periods went from "tolerable nuisance" to "incapacitating sensory nightmare." I stopped taking BC as of June 8 so they wouldn't interfere with the cortisol testing.

Mind you: I'd had some intermittent spotting when I was on BC, but it was so brief and occasional that I was getting used to not even needing to keep maxipads around anymore, just an "emergency" bundle of pantyliners. I never bled enough to justify even attempting to use a tampon.

Yesterday, for the first time since 2021, I got my FULLLLLL period.

I was JUST beginning to come to terms with having to stay off BC at least through September to fully determine if my current health problems are a result of BC or if Otis (the cyst/tumor/both on my pituitary gland) is the real culprit. I thought, meh, it's annoying to have to wait, but I don't need this medication THAT badly anyway, it'll be a good way to see how my reproductive system calibrates itself--

Y'ALL. I forgot how AWFUL this is.

I forgot what it's like to be able to smell EVERYTHING--and in New York, there's even more of everything. Like, I can wash the dishes in the dark and know when the pot isn't entirely clean because I can smell a trace amount of olive oil. I can be awakened from sleep because I can SMELL the exact moment one of the cats uses the litterbox (the pine litter absorbs the smell almost instantly, which is amazing, but in the 0.2 seconds between the crap leaving their butt and the litter absorbing the smell, I SMELL IT).

I forgot what it's like to feel EVERY SINGLE ATOM that touches my skin and overthink every article of clothing in my closet before I get dressed for the day. Like, I can shave my legs and then FEEL my hair growing back. I put on a face mask in the doctor's office and my lip eczema is lurking right there with a taser like, "hahahaha, you say you care about public safety, but do you really? How much? *taser zap* HOW ABOUT NOW?"

I forgot the LEG CRAMPS--like, why? Yeah, the uterine liner is shedding, what does that even have to do with my legs? My back, fine. But leave my legs alone.

I forgot, most of all, what it's like to just cry at the smallest things. Like, not JUST the things that make sense to be sad/stressed/angry about, but like, I'll open a box of Scotch-Brite pads and then cry because they're all so perfectly positioned in that bag and I'm about to take one out and separate it from its brothers and sisters and they'll never see it again and now I'm so sad I want to jump off a bridge but I can't because my cats will miss me and I could never do that to my parents and--

HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO KEEP DOING THIS EVERY MONTH until we figure out whether or not the meds that prevented me from having to do this every month are causing MORE harm?

And if they are, then I'll have to...I don't know, stop taking them? Try something different? And if they're not, then I need to do whatever else we need to do in order to prove that the only reasonable next step is LITERAL BRAIN SURGERY LIKE--?!

Ok. I'm gonna go cry into my iced coffee about Scotch-Brite pads. And maybe put on real clothes. Maybe.